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Speaker 1: The Nikki's Nikki A guys, how's it going out there?

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Speaker 1: All the swells to you this Monday? Uh morn here

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Speaker 1: in Los Angeles, still here, extending my trip as I go. UM,

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Speaker 1: love this life that I've concocted for myself. I'm in

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Speaker 1: a great mood today. Um, as you know from last week.

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Speaker 1: First of all, i'd really hope you guys all had

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Speaker 1: a good weekend, and um, I got to interact with

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Speaker 1: a lot of you online and actually in person. Shout

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Speaker 1: out last night to the bestie Jess. Bestie Jess who

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Speaker 1: I saw in the parking lot of the show. I

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Speaker 1: did Supernova here in l A, which is if you

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Speaker 1: come to l A, definitely check out. Um Supernova, that's

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Speaker 1: the name of the show. But the place they do

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Speaker 1: that has a bunch of comedy, so check it out.

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Speaker 1: It's um in Hollywood. It's the best. It's so fun.

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Speaker 1: But anyway, last night I showed up for my set,

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Speaker 1: um like I was closing the show because I was

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Speaker 1: at dinner before with David Spade and my mom. Not

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Speaker 1: a big deal, just mom dropping, name name dropping my mom,

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Speaker 1: and um we went, we rushed over. I got there

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Speaker 1: just in time, ran up on stage and I took

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Speaker 1: my set was just like not what Sometimes Noah, people

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Speaker 1: get really excited to see me and come out like this.

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Speaker 1: This is the problem with shows at Super and Over

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Speaker 1: or anywhere like anywhere you go see comics and there's

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Speaker 1: like a bunch of comics on the bill. Uh in

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Speaker 1: a city like New Yorker, l A. It can go.

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Speaker 1: It can range from doing your A material that you

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Speaker 1: take it on the road and close with, or it

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Speaker 1: can be like new material because even though it's a

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Speaker 1: big show with headliners, like you might see your headliner

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Speaker 1: bomb because we're working on new stuff. Not bomb, but

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Speaker 1: you know, like not do as well to other people

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Speaker 1: in the show. So the one guy I said the

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Speaker 1: other night, he goes after it till he goes So

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Speaker 1: what is this like comics just like the this's just

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Speaker 1: a place for them to work out, and I go.

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Speaker 1: For me, it is I go, you are gonna see

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Speaker 1: every kind of thing. And sometimes I pull out the

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Speaker 1: A stuff because I'm in the mood to do that.

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Speaker 1: So it's whatever I'm in the mood for last night though,

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Speaker 1: um for oh, for instance, the other night I went

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Speaker 1: on stage, I posted a picture of it me and

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Speaker 1: Andrew Santino. If you want to see it, it's a

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Speaker 1: great picture. It's uh at Liz Vidge on Instagram l

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Speaker 1: I z v I G. She does the best comedy photography.

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Speaker 1: I mean it's insane. My dad, my Father's Day post. Um,

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Speaker 1: yesterday's all her because she came out. She I'm gonna

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Speaker 1: have her come out and shoot my tour because she

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Speaker 1: just captures great moments and has great style and um yeah,

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Speaker 1: Liz Vig l I z v I G and um

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Speaker 1: follow her on Instagram. There's a picture from the other

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Speaker 1: night of me and Andrew Santino, like he brought me

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Speaker 1: up and I'm just like coming up and in between

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Speaker 1: we're talking and it's the moment I go, was that on?

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Speaker 1: Was that? I go? Was that new? Because he killed

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Speaker 1: and it was really worked out stuff, Like I was like,

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Speaker 1: I haven't heard it before. I go, is that new?

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Speaker 1: When he goes yeah, and I fuck you, like I

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Speaker 1: was just it's about moment of me being like is

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Speaker 1: that now? Goddamn you? And I still think it wasn't

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Speaker 1: brand new. It was two worked out like I I

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Speaker 1: can see as a comedian when like something is like

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Speaker 1: I just know you know, but it was probably knew

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Speaker 1: in the sense of what he was saying, but I

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Speaker 1: was like, fuck, I'm doing stuff that I'm saying for

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Speaker 1: the first time. Like literally, I didn't get to talk

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Speaker 1: about my thoughts on Louis on mar because we didn't

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Speaker 1: just decided not to go there. But um, I I

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Speaker 1: have been like, oh, maybe I should talk about it

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Speaker 1: on stage. It like got my mind kind of thinking

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Speaker 1: about it and how to make it funny. And I'm

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Speaker 1: I'm on stage list a night like espousing about, you know,

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Speaker 1: my thoughts on Louie and cancel culture. And then I

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Speaker 1: realized I had no punch line, and I literally was like,

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Speaker 1: there's nothing there's nothing funny about what any of this,

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Speaker 1: and people I go, I, you know, then you do

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Speaker 1: the classic joke. This is a classic comedy save if

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Speaker 1: you ever hear a comedian go, I don't know why

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Speaker 1: I've turned this into a Ted talk. That is just

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Speaker 1: that is the hackiest out. There's only like one person

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Speaker 1: that used that original only once, and then all of

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Speaker 1: us since then have used it as like an easy out.

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Speaker 1: And it's true. I mean sometimes and especially in this

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Speaker 1: setting that I was in, it looks like a Ted

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Speaker 1: doc and it just cuts the tension of like I

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Speaker 1: acknowledged this is not funny. And then at the very

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Speaker 1: last so I got the light and I'm like, I

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Speaker 1: cannot get off stage. These people probably some of them

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Speaker 1: came to see me. Thoms A. Gurrow was also on

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Speaker 1: the show. Uh, there was like this little lineup was

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Speaker 1: sick last night. I got there late, so I didn't

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Speaker 1: see everyone that was on it. But you know, there

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Speaker 1: were really great comics on the show. Let's see who's

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Speaker 1: on it. I have a picture of it here. Um.

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Speaker 1: So they saw Anthony Jessinik, they saw Jeff Ross, Greg

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Speaker 1: fitz simmons, Ian Edwards. Yeah, they had a great show.

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Speaker 1: And then me, I come up there. I'm like and

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Speaker 1: I go, I'm sorry, I just like, I spent the

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Speaker 1: whole time proselytizing, and I go, by the way, I'm

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Speaker 1: fucking stoked that I just nailed that word. I go,

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Speaker 1: that's the first time I've ever attempted to say that word.

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Speaker 1: And I got nervous and I nailed it. Uh So

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Speaker 1: then I go, can I go, let me just acknowledge

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Speaker 1: because what I'm trying to do on stage now is

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Speaker 1: just always be as honest, like you have to do

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Speaker 1: material that you maybe are not in that same frame

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Speaker 1: of mind when you wrote it. But I try to

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Speaker 1: get there, and especially when I'm in a position where

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Speaker 1: I'm I'm out of like material, I really am just

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Speaker 1: up there. I've kind of like everyone's kind of like

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Speaker 1: underwhelmed by me, even though I'm the closer, and you know,

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Speaker 1: I walk on stage and people are like, like, it's

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Speaker 1: a huge response. It's really nice, like things have changed

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Speaker 1: for me. I'm coming back from the pandemic and now

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Speaker 1: people like know who I am and it's in a

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Speaker 1: way that they didn't before. It's so nice, but the

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Speaker 1: pressure is like, boy, like I know that afterwards you're

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Speaker 1: gonna be like, she just like wasn't as good. So

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Speaker 1: whenever I bomb, now I go, or last night I go,

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Speaker 1: let's can I just say I want to give you

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Speaker 1: guys a good show. I haven't yet. I have to

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Speaker 1: get off stage. Let me like really bring it home.

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna give you at least one minute, so you

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Speaker 1: can when you're on the car right home, you can

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Speaker 1: be like, she really bored us the whole time until

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Speaker 1: the last minute, and you'll maybe remember that. And I

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Speaker 1: go and I did a bit and it did it

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Speaker 1: did well, and then I closed with the joke of

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Speaker 1: you know my molestation chunk that I talked about on Uh,

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Speaker 1: that's it's going great. By the way, I've really figured

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Speaker 1: out that chunk of material. So I closed on that.

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Speaker 1: And then as I'm getting out stage, I go, so,

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Speaker 1: I go, please remember that this this was I was

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Speaker 1: working out stuff. I had to do that, and I go,

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Speaker 1: I know this wasn't as funny as the Rose compilations

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Speaker 1: you've watched with me on YouTube, because that's what everyone's

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Speaker 1: always compared. Like, people are fans of mine because they

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Speaker 1: see me on I have millions of hits on these

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Speaker 1: Rosse compilations where I fucking slay and it's just joke

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Speaker 1: chu chokoko, And then they come and see me and

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Speaker 1: I'm like, you know, I just think that if you're

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Speaker 1: not a bad person, you just know that if you

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Speaker 1: accidentally say the N word when you're singing Whop that

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Speaker 1: you didn't mean to it was an accident, people can

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Speaker 1: forgive you. And they're like, what is is just make

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Speaker 1: a joke about someone's you know, how you want someone

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Speaker 1: to die and um it. So it's just the best

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Speaker 1: part about comedy I feel is My job is always

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Speaker 1: just to be honest in the moment, So sometimes I

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Speaker 1: have to take a breath and go what am I

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Speaker 1: feeling right now? And what I was feeling was embarrassed

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Speaker 1: that it didn't do well. Needed to call it out.

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Speaker 1: And they left so hard when I said that, because

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Speaker 1: they all know, like, this was not what we wanted.

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Speaker 1: You didn't give us what we came here expecting. You

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Speaker 1: gave us something, but it wasn't, you know, it wasn't

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Speaker 1: what we expect from you know, Nikki glaz or whatever

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Speaker 1: that is, except um my besties by the way, like

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Speaker 1: my best these were that. So there were some besties there,

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Speaker 1: there was another. There was a mommy there from Your

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Speaker 1: Mom's House podcast. Comedy fans and my fans. Comedy fans

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Speaker 1: in general are the fucking best and they understand the process.

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Speaker 1: They are the ones that come to every show and

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Speaker 1: support comedians and are like part of the community and

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Speaker 1: like friends with us. Like this girl came alone from

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Speaker 1: the um your Mom's House podcast. She's just like, she's like,

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Speaker 1: I'm a mommy, you're a mom and she's like your mommy,

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Speaker 1: so I like love you and she's like I came

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Speaker 1: here to support Tom will come out any time to

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Speaker 1: support you. And it was so cute because during in

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Speaker 1: the middle of it, uh, I started talking about Louie

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Speaker 1: and I got some like jeers. I was like, it

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Speaker 1: was either like yeah or like I couldn't tell if

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Speaker 1: they were against what I was saying or positive. And

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Speaker 1: so at some point I go, are you like disagree?

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Speaker 1: Is is this in in favor of me of what

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Speaker 1: I'm saying or like against me? And she goes, we

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Speaker 1: love it, And I was like, and then she got

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Speaker 1: yelled at for a sayment. She goes, she asked me,

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Speaker 1: and I go, next time you yell out if I

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Speaker 1: ask you, you you always yell at. But I want to

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Speaker 1: shout out to both of them. Jess. Jess was so sweet.

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Speaker 1: It was funny because I was like hiding in the

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Speaker 1: side of the parking lot with my mom as we

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Speaker 1: waited for Uber, and I didn't really want to talk

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Speaker 1: to the audience or be not that I didn't want

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Speaker 1: to talk to them. I didn't want them to because I, after,

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Speaker 1: you don't do so well, people kind of like try

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Speaker 1: not to look at you. It's so awkward. I've when

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Speaker 1: I used to bomb back in the day and being

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Speaker 1: no like no one knew who I was. I was

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Speaker 1: in the middle act. I would have to stand out

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Speaker 1: in the lobby, and like I would always hide because

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Speaker 1: I didn't want people to be like feel sorry for me,

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Speaker 1: you know, and uh. And so I was standing there

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Speaker 1: with my mom and trying not to make I contact

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Speaker 1: with him, and trying not to hear anyone talking about

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Speaker 1: how I wasn't that they like, you know, because when

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Speaker 1: you see five comedies, six means you want to go

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Speaker 1: I liked him best, she was the worst, Like you

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Speaker 1: want to rank them, even I do that on the show.

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Speaker 1: So I didn't want to hear any disk questions that

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Speaker 1: people have when they leave a show. Like when I

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Speaker 1: leave a movie, I'm always like I didn't like it,

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Speaker 1: but I never think the director might be walking out

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Speaker 1: of Werenburg Theater into pair and like didn't like my

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Speaker 1: opinion about I don't know fucking Patch Adams, but the

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Speaker 1: artists are lingering. Famously infamously heard a girl in a

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Speaker 1: bathroom stall one time say she didn't like my She goes,

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Speaker 1: I don't know I like that last girl but the

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Speaker 1: girl that and I go stop talking, to stop talking.

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Speaker 1: I'm in the stall, and I told her to stop talking.

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Speaker 1: She was, I go, I'm in here. I'm in here.

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Speaker 1: I go, I know you're entitled to your opinion. I

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Speaker 1: just don't want to hear it. And she was like,

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Speaker 1: I'm so sorry. And I go, it's okay, babe. But

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Speaker 1: we're among you, We're we we walk among you. I'm

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Speaker 1: in the same building you saw me walk on stage.

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Speaker 1: This is an establishment where I don't have a special bathroom.

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Speaker 1: I have to, like so sometimes in the bathroom, and

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Speaker 1: I I at shows where I have to use the

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Speaker 1: same bathroom as the crowd, and by half to I

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Speaker 1: mean like not that I'm like I'm better, but like

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Speaker 1: there's not a green room bathroom. I always shut my

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Speaker 1: ears and I go, so I don't hear anyone talk

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Speaker 1: bad about me or good really, because the good is

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Speaker 1: never good enough all that bullshit. Um, but so Jess,

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Speaker 1: bestie Jess was talking out. She was like, she was like, Nicky,

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Speaker 1: I love you, or I said something like that, and

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Speaker 1: she was like, oh no, I listened to your podcast.

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Speaker 1: I love you. And I go, oh my god, thank you,

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Speaker 1: and she goes, um, I I I've heard you talk

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Speaker 1: about things on the podcast. She said something like, I've

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Speaker 1: heard a lot of the podcast on there, I like

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Speaker 1: knew the places you were going and like had the

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Speaker 1: inside track, and I was like, you fucking get it.

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Speaker 1: And I was like, you're definitely gonna hear me talk

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Speaker 1: about that sad on the podcast tomorrow. And she goes,

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Speaker 1: she goes, it was great, you know, she said it

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Speaker 1: was great. It was. She was like so excited. There

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Speaker 1: was no disappointment in her eyes. She was so sweet

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Speaker 1: and um and I was just like, thanks, bestie, and

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Speaker 1: I asked her name and I said, I'll give you

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Speaker 1: a shout out, so Jess, if you're listening, which I

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Speaker 1: know you are, thank you so much for that. It

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Speaker 1: made me feel so good and very cool in front

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Speaker 1: of my mom. And then another best or then another

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Speaker 1: girl from your mom's house. She chatted with us for

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Speaker 1: a while and was so sweet, and I was just like, God,

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Speaker 1: comedy fans are the best. They just like they're are friends,

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Speaker 1: Like they don't have to do calm, need to be

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Speaker 1: if they appreciate good comedy and good podcasts. They're one

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Speaker 1: of us and they just have different jobs. And I

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Speaker 1: just feel like we're a community. It's not like comedians

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Speaker 1: against their fans. It can be all together, and I

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Speaker 1: just honestly, Taylor Swift has taught me that, Like she's

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Speaker 1: friends with her fans. She invites them in, she has

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Speaker 1: them over to her house for listening parties, Like you

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Speaker 1: got to bring them in because they are It's not

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Speaker 1: to show your appreciation and be like, thank you for

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Speaker 1: liking me, it's like you need to there. They are

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Speaker 1: your friends. And like the way I feel about Taylor Swift,

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Speaker 1: I feel very connected to her in a way that

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Speaker 1: if I was talking about like if if something happened

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Speaker 1: to her like this weekend, and I almost started crying

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Speaker 1: because I was in my parents were probably like my

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Speaker 1: my dad really rolls his eyes about my love for

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Speaker 1: Taylor Swift, even though I'm like, you literally feel the

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Speaker 1: same way about the Beatles. But he would be like,

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Speaker 1: you could compure those and I'm like, yes, you could. Actually,

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Speaker 1: she's going to be as remembered as the Beatles and

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Speaker 1: you're just old and um. But I was like, if

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Speaker 1: she if something happened to her, I like, I would

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Speaker 1: definitely cry and be as devastated as a family member

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Speaker 1: or a friend. And I know that's ridiculous, but it's

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Speaker 1: or might seem ridiculous to you, but it's it's it

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Speaker 1: is just true. I would almost prefer a family member

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Speaker 1: or friend to die over Taylor Swift because I rely

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Speaker 1: on her to survive so much. I found out the

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Speaker 1: rerelease of Red, her my first album, and I fell

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Speaker 1: in love with Taylor Swift. Um. She's re releasing her

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Speaker 1: own version Uh in order to gain you know, UH,

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Speaker 1: like to own her own ship. She's releasing Taylor's version

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Speaker 1: of Red. It's coming in November, and I literally wrote

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Speaker 1: all my story ago gotta live, gott to survive till November.

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Speaker 1: And that's not like mental health, like don't kill yourself.

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Speaker 1: I mean it used to mean that way for me,

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Speaker 1: but now it means like I look both ways when

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Speaker 1: I'm crossing the street a little bit more. I just

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Speaker 1: gotta be around. She's releasing like ten new songs that

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Speaker 1: were written for Red. This girl is prolific as Funx.

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Speaker 1: She wrote ten new songs, and she's releasing a ten

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Speaker 1: minute version of All Too Well, which is everyone's favorite

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Speaker 1: song that has the effort in and apparently Taylor Show

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Speaker 1: fans are freaking the fuck out the She released the

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Speaker 1: album cover for Taylor's version Red, which is looks like

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Speaker 1: the original red thing, but it's more mature version. And

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Speaker 1: fans are freaking out because that picture we've already seen.

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Speaker 1: We didn't see that picture, but we saw that photo

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Speaker 1: shoot during the Evermore promo and were like, but Evermore

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Speaker 1: was in black and white, so we didn't know that

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Speaker 1: it was a red lip and a red beret was

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Speaker 1: the same, like, and we're all like, oh my god,

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Speaker 1: she was reading us the whole time. And now it

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Speaker 1: was like, I know, you guys are like Nikki chill out,

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Speaker 1: but it was I just love her interaction with fans

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Speaker 1: and I want the same kind. I want Easter eggs

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Speaker 1: with fans. I went inside jokes. I want you guys

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Speaker 1: to be trying to piece together the little hints I'm

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Speaker 1: dropping you so you know which guy I'm talking about

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Speaker 1: with me about me having to tell you which guy

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Speaker 1: so that that guy doesn't get actually mad. And I

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Speaker 1: want you guys are like, I drop you hints all

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Speaker 1: the time, and I just I treat you like my friends,

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Speaker 1: and I hope you appreciate it. And if you're near

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Speaker 1: the podcast, you might be like, I'm not ready for

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Speaker 1: this friendship, Well then get ready because it's it's starting.

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Speaker 1: But also at the same time. We just have a

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Speaker 1: great time on the show. And um, I did. Uh.

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Speaker 1: Jess actually wrote me on UM just our Bessie wrote

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Speaker 1: me and I'll share that um with Andrew when we

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Speaker 1: get him in here. Uh. And he's he's in Connecticut,

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Speaker 1: but maybe you can hear me from here. Hey Andrew, Hey, Nick,

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Speaker 1: how are you going? I'm good, I'm good. It feels

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Speaker 1: like forever since we talked. I know, we really have

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Speaker 1: not texted or anything. We haven't talked since um I

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Speaker 1: left last week and um or since the podcast. Actually,

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Speaker 1: where are you again? Is it Connecticut? Yeah? I'm in

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Speaker 1: a place called Greenwage, Connecticut where rich people come to

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Speaker 1: murder poor people. I think it's a very illuminati here.

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Speaker 1: You drive past these houses and it doesn't make sense,

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Speaker 1: these homes, I mean, it's wild. Well what doesn't make

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Speaker 1: sense is I just found out that that that your dad.

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Speaker 1: Instead of flying to Connecticut because he's scared of flying,

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Speaker 1: even though he won't admit it publicly, he decided to

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Speaker 1: I thought he was renting a sprinter van to drive

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Speaker 1: from Florida to Connecticut, which is twenty drive. He bought

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Speaker 1: a sprinter van instead of you said, instead of two

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Speaker 1: plane tickets. He bought a sprinter van. I mean this thing,

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Speaker 1: you sent me pictures of it. It's it's like, it's

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Speaker 1: this is insane. My dad is absurd. My dad. First

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Speaker 1: of all, my step mom doesn't want it. She wants

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Speaker 1: to fly. She was complaining that they got stuck in

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Speaker 1: traffic by DC on Apparently that's horrible traffic. Don't you

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Speaker 1: dare go by there? Ever? Again, she got stuck in

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Speaker 1: traffic one time. Don't ever go that way. But anyways, yes, well,

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Speaker 1: next time they drive from Florida to Connecticut, they'll take

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Speaker 1: the scenic route and they won't try to go through

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Speaker 1: cut through DC. I can't understand. I'm trying to think

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Speaker 1: of other modes of transportation other that he could have

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Speaker 1: spent a hundred and twenty could have got a private

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Speaker 1: a private train, he could have He could have taken

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Speaker 1: flying lessons. He could have gotten Elon Musk to give

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Speaker 1: him a piggyback ride. He probably Yeah, I honestly, I

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Speaker 1: think the technology is there and he could have found

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Speaker 1: a way to make it happen. It's absurd, and I

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Speaker 1: love it. And that's your family. How is family time?

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Speaker 1: It's it's fantastic until it isn't. I'm on an air mattress,

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Speaker 1: which this is the most amazing thing about an air mattress.

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Speaker 1: It's great when you fall asleep on it. It's firm

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Speaker 1: and you slowly deflate. What happens in the night, What happens?

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00:16:26,640 --> 00:16:28,800
Speaker 1: There's slight leaks in it. I mean that means that

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Speaker 1: there's tiny, tiny leaks, but a tiny leak, just like

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Speaker 1: right away you would like why it's seeping out? Um?

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Speaker 1: And then you wake up in your butt is on

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Speaker 1: the floor, and it's like you're on a swimming pool raft.

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Speaker 1: I know, I know, Um, watch you in an air

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Speaker 1: mattress in Greenwich, Connecticut. You're the only man on an

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Speaker 1: air mattress in Greenwich, fucking Connecticut, where literally the elite,

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Speaker 1: the one percent, the one percent of the one percent

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Speaker 1: live in Greenwich. I just want to be humble. You

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Speaker 1: know what's up with Noah? I noticed something on Andrew's

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Speaker 1: Instagram story. Do you have sheets on your air mattress?

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Speaker 1: Your dad was using it as a mouse and it

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Speaker 1: looks like, Noah, don't you you come in to call

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Speaker 1: me out on my sheets? First of all the kids.

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Speaker 1: It says, I'm in the playroom slash living room. So

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Speaker 1: the kids. Every day I leave my room, I come

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Speaker 1: back and there's four kids playing on my bed like

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Speaker 1: it's like, you know, like a bouncy castle, like a

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Speaker 1: bounty castle. Castle castle that you came on. You know what?

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Speaker 1: Are you reading me out? And then you wiped it

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Speaker 1: on the carpet like old times? Okay, so you comes

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Speaker 1: up like come tarp first of all, yes, no one

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Speaker 1: else in granted connecticuts on an air mattress. I like

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Speaker 1: to stay humble, you know that. Also, they don't have

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Speaker 1: a room for me because I'm a single brother. I

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Speaker 1: don't have kids, I don't have a wife. I should

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Speaker 1: just bring a girl or love dolls, so I get

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Speaker 1: a fucking bed. I need a girlfriend. Now eventually you'll

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00:18:03,840 --> 00:18:06,399
Speaker 1: probably told her along to be the fam and they're

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Speaker 1: not going to put her on an air mattress. I

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00:18:07,800 --> 00:18:09,359
Speaker 1: can't believe they didn't have an extra room for you.

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Speaker 1: How many I should sleep in the sprinter van and

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Speaker 1: the engine? Honestly, that would be a better situation. So

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Speaker 1: are you sleeping well on the horrible because because I

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Speaker 1: wake up at my so we're on Central time. You

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00:18:23,000 --> 00:18:25,199
Speaker 1: know how I like sleeping in their playroom. That's like

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Speaker 1: sleeping in the kitchen. So I get woken up by

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00:18:29,400 --> 00:18:31,600
Speaker 1: Aggie and Leo and they punched me in my face

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00:18:31,800 --> 00:18:34,560
Speaker 1: and then they go wake up. And then Aggie has

403
00:18:34,600 --> 00:18:36,760
Speaker 1: learned jiu jitsu. Ask them what that feels like, because

404
00:18:36,800 --> 00:18:38,320
Speaker 1: I just want to know what it feels like to

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00:18:38,359 --> 00:18:40,000
Speaker 1: punch you in the face. I've thought about so much

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00:18:40,000 --> 00:18:43,000
Speaker 1: and I just want to hear how it, how it how?

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00:18:43,040 --> 00:18:48,200
Speaker 1: Then I would never want to punch you. I don't

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00:18:48,400 --> 00:18:54,840
Speaker 1: it would hurt my hand. But but yeah, Aggie knows

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Speaker 1: jiu jitsu. So this morning he woke me up and uh,

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Speaker 1: I literally opened my eyes. He goes, he looks at

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Speaker 1: me in the eyes. He goes, can I choke you out? Oh?

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Speaker 1: My god, can I choke you? Can I choke you out?

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00:19:06,560 --> 00:19:09,000
Speaker 1: And I go, Aggie, I'm not even awake to get

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Speaker 1: choked out. You can't choke you out. That's so cute,

415
00:19:15,000 --> 00:19:18,479
Speaker 1: and I I know, I'm like, God, I gotta put

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Speaker 1: down my cum tarp. And the name Aggie does not

417
00:19:22,400 --> 00:19:24,200
Speaker 1: make me think of a little boy. Aggie sounds like

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00:19:24,240 --> 00:19:29,000
Speaker 1: an old man to Mell's like AGI's one of those

419
00:19:29,080 --> 00:19:31,080
Speaker 1: names that like it's coming back it's like more of

420
00:19:31,119 --> 00:19:33,719
Speaker 1: an old like a name you'd associate like in the nineties,

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00:19:33,760 --> 00:19:38,040
Speaker 1: and there's no like young aggies. Um, so I I

422
00:19:38,080 --> 00:19:39,760
Speaker 1: go to my go No, you can't choke me out.

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Speaker 1: And my worry, honestly is he's really good at jujitsu

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00:19:43,240 --> 00:19:45,480
Speaker 1: for his age and no, like when he's thirteen, he'll

425
00:19:45,520 --> 00:19:48,480
Speaker 1: be able. I'm gonna wake up with an armbar and

426
00:19:48,560 --> 00:19:50,639
Speaker 1: my bone will be like I got your bone out

427
00:19:50,680 --> 00:19:54,000
Speaker 1: of your skin. But that's how good of a fighter

428
00:19:54,080 --> 00:19:56,280
Speaker 1: you like. It's crazy what these kids can do. I

429
00:19:56,320 --> 00:19:58,520
Speaker 1: would love that if if my nephew Arlo was like,

430
00:19:58,560 --> 00:20:00,640
Speaker 1: can I choke you out? Because I'd be like, oh

431
00:20:00,640 --> 00:20:02,240
Speaker 1: my god, you want to hug my neck? Like I

432
00:20:02,240 --> 00:20:05,640
Speaker 1: would just take it as a whatever affection I could get. Um,

433
00:20:05,800 --> 00:20:08,760
Speaker 1: let me just read you. Have you ever slept over

434
00:20:08,880 --> 00:20:12,240
Speaker 1: your sister or brother in law's Yeah, they don't. They

435
00:20:12,240 --> 00:20:14,320
Speaker 1: don't like me. It's not like they do, like like

436
00:20:14,400 --> 00:20:17,080
Speaker 1: Poppy and Harlow asked. Poppy asked for me sometimes and

437
00:20:17,119 --> 00:20:19,639
Speaker 1: it's so cute. But then I got over to her

438
00:20:19,680 --> 00:20:21,919
Speaker 1: place one time and I was holding she ran into man.

439
00:20:22,000 --> 00:20:24,720
Speaker 1: I was holding her and um, she kept going nick.

440
00:20:24,880 --> 00:20:26,840
Speaker 1: It was Nikki, and I was like, it's me. And

441
00:20:27,240 --> 00:20:29,920
Speaker 1: then I go, oh, you mean she kept My sister

442
00:20:30,000 --> 00:20:31,800
Speaker 1: goes no, she's saying Luigi, and I go, oh my god,

443
00:20:31,840 --> 00:20:34,080
Speaker 1: I think she's always asking for Luigi. It's not me.

444
00:20:34,800 --> 00:20:36,440
Speaker 1: It's so cute. I went over there. Oh my god,

445
00:20:36,480 --> 00:20:39,040
Speaker 1: Andrew was so cute. We I went over there the

446
00:20:39,119 --> 00:20:42,080
Speaker 1: last time, and Arlow has been kind of you know,

447
00:20:42,440 --> 00:20:43,720
Speaker 1: they fight a lot. It's a four year old and

448
00:20:43,760 --> 00:20:46,000
Speaker 1: a two year old and poppies too, and Arlow will

449
00:20:46,840 --> 00:20:48,880
Speaker 1: like throw balls at her head like either a little

450
00:20:48,920 --> 00:20:52,240
Speaker 1: abusive because their kids or whatever, and Poppy will hit

451
00:20:52,320 --> 00:20:54,040
Speaker 1: him and then he'll hit her a lot more hard

452
00:20:54,080 --> 00:20:59,200
Speaker 1: because he doesn't understand. So I went over and yeah, exactly.

453
00:20:59,560 --> 00:21:03,760
Speaker 1: So I really hate when around Christmas time when we

454
00:21:03,800 --> 00:21:06,320
Speaker 1: say Santa's watching and then suddenly he's like a good

455
00:21:06,359 --> 00:21:08,760
Speaker 1: boy because of this threat that doesn't even He's gonna

456
00:21:08,800 --> 00:21:10,919
Speaker 1: find out some days a lie. So I said to him,

457
00:21:10,920 --> 00:21:14,320
Speaker 1: I go, r Low. So I go I brought because

458
00:21:14,320 --> 00:21:15,879
Speaker 1: I brought over a bag and I said I have

459
00:21:16,080 --> 00:21:18,640
Speaker 1: I have a present for you, and I just had

460
00:21:18,640 --> 00:21:20,840
Speaker 1: this little dear figuring that I found in a box,

461
00:21:20,880 --> 00:21:22,480
Speaker 1: and I'm like, ohr low. This is just something to

462
00:21:22,480 --> 00:21:25,040
Speaker 1: give him when I come over there. And um, and

463
00:21:25,080 --> 00:21:27,119
Speaker 1: I brought Poppy a scrunch because she just likes like

464
00:21:27,240 --> 00:21:30,359
Speaker 1: pretty little like hair things, and um, I go, I

465
00:21:30,400 --> 00:21:32,120
Speaker 1: have a present for you, but um, I'm gonna talk

466
00:21:32,119 --> 00:21:34,480
Speaker 1: to your mom first and hear how you've been, if

467
00:21:34,480 --> 00:21:36,800
Speaker 1: you've been a nice boy, and if if you if

468
00:21:36,800 --> 00:21:39,119
Speaker 1: I get a report, then you can have it. When

469
00:21:39,160 --> 00:21:40,280
Speaker 1: I leave, I'll give it to you. And he kept

470
00:21:40,280 --> 00:21:42,679
Speaker 1: being like, when are you leaving? And I go, Okay, Actually,

471
00:21:42,680 --> 00:21:44,440
Speaker 1: if you ask me when I'm leaving, I'm gonna move

472
00:21:44,480 --> 00:21:46,879
Speaker 1: in and I'm never gonna leave. I go. Every time

473
00:21:46,920 --> 00:21:48,560
Speaker 1: you ask me if I'm when I'm leaving, I'm seriously,

474
00:21:48,600 --> 00:21:50,480
Speaker 1: I'm gonna stay an hour longer. So that's not gonna

475
00:21:50,520 --> 00:21:53,080
Speaker 1: work for you, and I go and I and I

476
00:21:53,080 --> 00:21:55,200
Speaker 1: felt a little weird about bribing him to be good,

477
00:21:55,240 --> 00:21:57,040
Speaker 1: but I go, it's the same thing as the Santa stuff.

478
00:21:57,080 --> 00:21:59,440
Speaker 1: This is year round. And also I'm real, I will

479
00:21:59,480 --> 00:22:00,960
Speaker 1: give you a is it? And I go, I go,

480
00:22:01,040 --> 00:22:03,520
Speaker 1: here's the deal, arlow I for the rest of the

481
00:22:03,560 --> 00:22:06,119
Speaker 1: time you and I know each other, who knows, like

482
00:22:06,280 --> 00:22:07,919
Speaker 1: for your whole life? I go, I will bring a

483
00:22:07,960 --> 00:22:10,399
Speaker 1: present every time I see you, every single time. I

484
00:22:10,400 --> 00:22:12,520
Speaker 1: would have a present for you, but you only get

485
00:22:12,560 --> 00:22:14,160
Speaker 1: it if I get a report that you've been nice

486
00:22:14,200 --> 00:22:19,879
Speaker 1: to Poppy. Yeah, and uh, he got Wait one second,

487
00:22:20,600 --> 00:22:22,720
Speaker 1: I think this is how Santa Claus got started. What

488
00:22:22,800 --> 00:22:27,760
Speaker 1: you're doing to Arlow, I exist, I'm making a list

489
00:22:27,760 --> 00:22:29,879
Speaker 1: and I'm checking it twice. And if he throws a

490
00:22:29,920 --> 00:22:31,879
Speaker 1: ball at Poppy said, he ain't getting a little figuring

491
00:22:31,920 --> 00:22:33,320
Speaker 1: deer that I did dug out of a box that

492
00:22:33,320 --> 00:22:35,640
Speaker 1: I would have thrown away anyway, Like you can bring

493
00:22:35,640 --> 00:22:37,720
Speaker 1: a kid any like a little thing like a trinket,

494
00:22:37,720 --> 00:22:39,280
Speaker 1: and his is a prize, you know, like a piece

495
00:22:39,280 --> 00:22:41,240
Speaker 1: of candy or whatever. So I go, I can I

496
00:22:41,280 --> 00:22:43,080
Speaker 1: can follow through on this. It'll be fun because I'll

497
00:22:43,080 --> 00:22:45,080
Speaker 1: start collecting toys to like have in my box to

498
00:22:45,119 --> 00:22:47,320
Speaker 1: give him every time I go over. And it's just

499
00:22:47,359 --> 00:22:49,439
Speaker 1: like a fun thing, but it's contingent on, like you

500
00:22:49,440 --> 00:22:51,240
Speaker 1: have to be a good boy. So we sat down

501
00:22:51,280 --> 00:22:53,639
Speaker 1: and I'm holding Poppy and I'm trying to explain it.

502
00:22:53,680 --> 00:22:55,800
Speaker 1: We start running through scenarios of like, Okay, when Poppy

503
00:22:55,800 --> 00:22:57,720
Speaker 1: does this, what how could you what would you do

504
00:22:58,040 --> 00:23:00,399
Speaker 1: to respond? Like what what are you gonna do in

505
00:23:00,440 --> 00:23:04,440
Speaker 1: this scenario? And so we go, you know, um, when

506
00:23:04,440 --> 00:23:06,960
Speaker 1: Poppy hits you, what do you do? And he goes

507
00:23:07,040 --> 00:23:09,520
Speaker 1: be nice and I go, yeah, but isn't there a

508
00:23:09,520 --> 00:23:11,320
Speaker 1: part of you that you probably want to hit her back?

509
00:23:11,320 --> 00:23:13,520
Speaker 1: Because she hit you? Right, that makes sense, Like you

510
00:23:13,600 --> 00:23:16,160
Speaker 1: hit her, that makes sense. I think that that that's

511
00:23:16,240 --> 00:23:18,399
Speaker 1: why you've been doing it. And that's like, okay, that

512
00:23:18,400 --> 00:23:20,200
Speaker 1: makes sense, and I go, but guess what are low?

513
00:23:20,600 --> 00:23:23,280
Speaker 1: Poppy is a little little baby, and we have to

514
00:23:23,320 --> 00:23:26,600
Speaker 1: protect her because she's stupider than you. Because when you

515
00:23:26,600 --> 00:23:28,919
Speaker 1: get older, you get smarter, and so she's kind of

516
00:23:29,040 --> 00:23:32,200
Speaker 1: dumb right now because she's a baby. All babies are dumb.

517
00:23:32,240 --> 00:23:34,120
Speaker 1: I go, you were a dumb baby once, and guess

518
00:23:34,160 --> 00:23:37,800
Speaker 1: what we did. We didn't let any boys throw balls

519
00:23:37,800 --> 00:23:40,639
Speaker 1: at your head ever. We never let them do that

520
00:23:40,680 --> 00:23:42,520
Speaker 1: because you're a little baby and we need to protect you.

521
00:23:42,560 --> 00:23:45,639
Speaker 1: We need to all work together because you're so babies

522
00:23:45,640 --> 00:23:47,920
Speaker 1: are so dumb. We need your help to be You're

523
00:23:47,960 --> 00:23:51,479
Speaker 1: so smart. You gotta, you gotta. When Poppy hits it's

524
00:23:51,480 --> 00:23:54,880
Speaker 1: because she's she's stupid. And my sister's kind of like, well,

525
00:23:55,080 --> 00:23:57,040
Speaker 1: and I'm like but she's gonna get smart, but you

526
00:23:57,080 --> 00:23:58,760
Speaker 1: have to teach her how to be as smart as you.

527
00:23:59,160 --> 00:24:02,439
Speaker 1: And I was like, okay, so when Poppy wants my

528
00:24:02,480 --> 00:24:05,359
Speaker 1: sister goes, okay, what about when you're eating, um, some

529
00:24:05,440 --> 00:24:08,600
Speaker 1: goldfish and Poppy sticks her hand in the bag and

530
00:24:08,680 --> 00:24:11,200
Speaker 1: want some. What do you do? And he went and

531
00:24:11,200 --> 00:24:13,359
Speaker 1: grabbed the goldfish and then just like gives them to

532
00:24:13,400 --> 00:24:15,600
Speaker 1: her and it was really cute, and I was like, yeah,

533
00:24:15,720 --> 00:24:17,919
Speaker 1: so he's just trying to get check these off. But

534
00:24:17,960 --> 00:24:19,440
Speaker 1: I thought that was a good way to break through

535
00:24:19,480 --> 00:24:21,639
Speaker 1: to him because he goes, were you because he's always

536
00:24:21,680 --> 00:24:24,240
Speaker 1: asking us about who were babies. He goes, I was

537
00:24:24,280 --> 00:24:26,080
Speaker 1: a baby, and I go, you were a baby? And

538
00:24:26,280 --> 00:24:29,240
Speaker 1: he goes you baby, and I go yeah. He goes,

539
00:24:29,280 --> 00:24:32,679
Speaker 1: you want me to choke you out? No, he goes, theory,

540
00:24:32,680 --> 00:24:34,560
Speaker 1: I'm smarter than you. Is that what you're saying because

541
00:24:34,560 --> 00:24:40,040
Speaker 1: I'm older? Yeah? And you you're dumb, dumb little baby,

542
00:24:40,080 --> 00:24:42,080
Speaker 1: I mean. And this is all very sexual for me too.

543
00:24:42,200 --> 00:24:46,680
Speaker 1: I love playing the character of Poppy and bed Unfortunately, um,

544
00:24:46,720 --> 00:24:50,440
Speaker 1: I'm a dumb baby. Please throw balls in my head.

545
00:24:52,160 --> 00:24:56,600
Speaker 1: The life there goes my social life clueless. Oh oh

546
00:24:56,640 --> 00:24:58,320
Speaker 1: my God. Speaking of place, did I tell you guys

547
00:24:58,320 --> 00:25:01,840
Speaker 1: all breck and Meyer the other day show? Um, he

548
00:25:01,960 --> 00:25:10,400
Speaker 1: plays uh the skateboard like burnout. He was awesome. He's

549
00:25:10,400 --> 00:25:13,360
Speaker 1: been in a million things. Breck and Meyer. He's definitely

550
00:25:13,440 --> 00:25:15,280
Speaker 1: very famous. And he's at the other night at the

551
00:25:15,280 --> 00:25:17,520
Speaker 1: comedy store. I walk over to go, hey, will you

552
00:25:17,560 --> 00:25:19,240
Speaker 1: let me. I'm gonna do ten minutes not fifteen. The

553
00:25:19,280 --> 00:25:21,399
Speaker 1: show is running way and I was tired, and I

554
00:25:21,440 --> 00:25:23,920
Speaker 1: walk over the booth and I go, I'm like, is

555
00:25:23,960 --> 00:25:26,040
Speaker 1: that breck and Meyer And they go, I don't know.

556
00:25:26,119 --> 00:25:30,600
Speaker 1: I go, I love you and like and Air Griffins

557
00:25:30,640 --> 00:25:31,960
Speaker 1: on stage. No, this was on the side of the

558
00:25:32,000 --> 00:25:35,399
Speaker 1: ring I love you, and he kind of like, and

559
00:25:35,480 --> 00:25:38,520
Speaker 1: I go, I love you, I love for you, and

560
00:25:38,560 --> 00:25:42,360
Speaker 1: he was like thanks, and I was like and then

561
00:25:42,359 --> 00:25:45,000
Speaker 1: I then literally Andrews did do was like Nicky Glazer

562
00:25:45,040 --> 00:25:46,840
Speaker 1: and I just like ran up on stage. So I'm like, okay, good.

563
00:25:46,880 --> 00:25:48,200
Speaker 1: He thinks the girl that said I love you is

564
00:25:48,240 --> 00:25:50,280
Speaker 1: not like he didn't know what he was, but it

565
00:25:50,359 --> 00:25:55,080
Speaker 1: was I seeing a guy that was on clueless. Still

566
00:25:55,640 --> 00:25:57,800
Speaker 1: he looks the same age. I mean, I don't even

567
00:25:57,800 --> 00:26:01,280
Speaker 1: know I know him from he was in Seth Green's

568
00:26:01,320 --> 00:26:04,040
Speaker 1: film that I watched. Remember that movie we watched where

569
00:26:04,040 --> 00:26:08,160
Speaker 1: they go to Thailand. It was a great movie, Seth,

570
00:26:08,560 --> 00:26:11,120
Speaker 1: I forget what it was. Yeah. Oh breck and Meyer.

571
00:26:11,160 --> 00:26:15,360
Speaker 1: He's so cute. I once saw him at um A

572
00:26:15,400 --> 00:26:18,240
Speaker 1: Cafe as well, but I didn't I know. He looks

573
00:26:18,320 --> 00:26:22,720
Speaker 1: fucking great. He was also on the show with Zach Morris,

574
00:26:22,720 --> 00:26:25,520
Speaker 1: What a Mall Part my best friend Mark, Paul um

575
00:26:25,640 --> 00:26:29,040
Speaker 1: Risolian Aisles or whatever that show was, you know, Uh,

576
00:26:29,280 --> 00:26:32,199
Speaker 1: burtin Brainstorm. I don't know what it was called Burten

577
00:26:32,240 --> 00:26:35,639
Speaker 1: Brainstorm sounds like a legging line that would be promoted

578
00:26:35,680 --> 00:26:40,240
Speaker 1: to me on Instagram. Um so uh, I said, I

579
00:26:40,280 --> 00:26:41,960
Speaker 1: love you too him. It was so much fun, got Andrew.

580
00:26:41,960 --> 00:26:43,360
Speaker 1: I have so much stuff to tell you. I'm sure

581
00:26:43,359 --> 00:26:46,080
Speaker 1: you have so much stuff to tell you. Can I

582
00:26:46,160 --> 00:26:47,919
Speaker 1: just share one second? I said, I was gonna do it.

583
00:26:48,200 --> 00:26:49,960
Speaker 1: Jess one of our best ties who I ran to

584
00:26:50,000 --> 00:26:51,960
Speaker 1: the parking lot last night, she sent a d M

585
00:26:52,160 --> 00:26:55,280
Speaker 1: two our account and I just want to say the

586
00:26:55,359 --> 00:26:57,960
Speaker 1: nice things she said about us. One second. No, let

587
00:26:57,960 --> 00:27:00,399
Speaker 1: me find your d M. NICKI M the best to you,

588
00:27:00,440 --> 00:27:02,840
Speaker 1: said I in the parking lot after your show at Supernova.

589
00:27:03,080 --> 00:27:04,840
Speaker 1: I'm in l A from Chicago and truly believe I

590
00:27:04,920 --> 00:27:07,520
Speaker 1: manifested one seeing you perform in two meeting you during

591
00:27:07,520 --> 00:27:09,439
Speaker 1: this trip anyway, I just want to emphasize how much

592
00:27:09,440 --> 00:27:10,919
Speaker 1: I admire and look up to you. I've dabbled in

593
00:27:10,960 --> 00:27:12,560
Speaker 1: stand up and just started my own podcast, and you're

594
00:27:12,760 --> 00:27:14,720
Speaker 1: someone I looked to as an example. The way you're

595
00:27:14,760 --> 00:27:17,679
Speaker 1: authentically yourself, unapologetic, risk taking in bold it pushes me

596
00:27:17,720 --> 00:27:19,840
Speaker 1: to being afraid to do the same. So sweet. Watching

597
00:27:19,840 --> 00:27:21,879
Speaker 1: you trout new material tonight, material that I've heard you

598
00:27:21,880 --> 00:27:23,880
Speaker 1: talk through on the podcast was so incredible. I learned

599
00:27:23,880 --> 00:27:25,439
Speaker 1: a ton by following you, and I needed to make

600
00:27:25,440 --> 00:27:28,239
Speaker 1: sure to thank you for doing so. Doing that so

601
00:27:28,320 --> 00:27:30,480
Speaker 1: vulnerably you inspire people, whether you realize it or not.

602
00:27:30,560 --> 00:27:32,959
Speaker 1: Thank you, and I love you. Bestie. You two Noah

603
00:27:33,000 --> 00:27:36,040
Speaker 1: and Andrew or Andrew and Noah. She put you hers.

604
00:27:36,400 --> 00:27:39,040
Speaker 1: Let's let's let's und Will you look up Noah what

605
00:27:39,240 --> 00:27:43,240
Speaker 1: Justice podcast is? Because shout out to everyone who UH

606
00:27:43,520 --> 00:27:49,040
Speaker 1: supported uh bestie Lisa, Um, Lisa Doll who has an

607
00:27:49,080 --> 00:27:53,159
Speaker 1: only fans and is a suicide girl. UM that's what

608
00:27:53,280 --> 00:27:55,280
Speaker 1: people call me too, because I talked about so much

609
00:27:55,560 --> 00:27:59,280
Speaker 1: but I love bestie supporting besties. It was so nice.

610
00:27:59,320 --> 00:28:01,919
Speaker 1: She wrote that she got she got people signing up

611
00:28:01,920 --> 00:28:04,120
Speaker 1: for only fans from my mention on the podcast. So

612
00:28:04,840 --> 00:28:07,320
Speaker 1: you know, let's let's I love the idea of promoting

613
00:28:07,400 --> 00:28:09,200
Speaker 1: Bestie's doing cool stuff. So we'll find out just this

614
00:28:09,280 --> 00:28:10,840
Speaker 1: podcast and we'll have it for the final thought and

615
00:28:10,920 --> 00:28:12,880
Speaker 1: let you know about her new podcast. And it's cool

616
00:28:12,920 --> 00:28:15,399
Speaker 1: to support new podcasts because it's cool to get on

617
00:28:15,400 --> 00:28:17,200
Speaker 1: the ground floor of something. I'll tell you that. And

618
00:28:17,320 --> 00:28:19,639
Speaker 1: just seemed fucking cool as ship. Oh you haven't, Noah,

619
00:28:20,280 --> 00:28:22,000
Speaker 1: you want to? Should we go away for a guy

620
00:28:22,040 --> 00:28:24,919
Speaker 1: to say, Hey, Andrew, you're great in that thing on

621
00:28:25,040 --> 00:28:28,040
Speaker 1: that thing. Oh, by the way, I sell spark plugs

622
00:28:28,080 --> 00:28:33,120
Speaker 1: like you can. Yeah, we're not going to anything. You're yeah, yes,

623
00:28:33,600 --> 00:28:36,600
Speaker 1: but I do you and you well, we'll let you

624
00:28:36,640 --> 00:28:38,440
Speaker 1: know what do you want to do it an hour later?

625
00:28:39,440 --> 00:28:42,200
Speaker 1: Let's just do it now, because who knows where this

626
00:28:42,200 --> 00:28:46,760
Speaker 1: show is gonna go. It's it's at Peeking Podcast peaking

627
00:28:47,320 --> 00:28:51,040
Speaker 1: p a K or is it about p A K

628
00:28:52,040 --> 00:28:54,800
Speaker 1: K I n G. Yeah, it's a self help podcast.

629
00:28:54,840 --> 00:28:58,280
Speaker 1: He can oh love it? So check out the Peeking

630
00:28:58,320 --> 00:29:06,120
Speaker 1: podcast from bestie. Just let get into the news yours.

631
00:29:07,720 --> 00:29:10,960
Speaker 1: I mean, just this is a class. I'm obsessed with

632
00:29:11,000 --> 00:29:13,840
Speaker 1: all the SoundBite summer show. I hope people also love

633
00:29:13,880 --> 00:29:17,360
Speaker 1: our our theme songs. It makes me really happy, especially

634
00:29:17,400 --> 00:29:19,000
Speaker 1: when I'm here for four days. I hope you had

635
00:29:19,040 --> 00:29:21,920
Speaker 1: a great weekend and had all the swells out there. Um,

636
00:29:22,040 --> 00:29:25,160
Speaker 1: I know we did. Uh we really did. I think we.

637
00:29:25,280 --> 00:29:28,000
Speaker 1: Oh my god, We're gonna come back even stronger together

638
00:29:28,440 --> 00:29:30,680
Speaker 1: in our new podcast studio. Should we talk about it?

639
00:29:30,880 --> 00:29:33,680
Speaker 1: Maybe later? Yeah, we'll love video up soon you guys.

640
00:29:33,920 --> 00:29:36,600
Speaker 1: All right? So first story, folks. A webcam that takes

641
00:29:36,600 --> 00:29:39,480
Speaker 1: photos on top of a national park in Austria every

642
00:29:39,520 --> 00:29:43,560
Speaker 1: twenty minutes captured a couple having sex and publishing software

643
00:29:43,600 --> 00:29:46,520
Speaker 1: posted it online. You know why they posted it because

644
00:29:46,560 --> 00:29:50,160
Speaker 1: they didn't get facial recognition because they were doing doggies style.

645
00:29:50,440 --> 00:29:52,520
Speaker 1: So it was just the guy. I didn't know it

646
00:29:52,600 --> 00:29:57,520
Speaker 1: was people. Oh my god, two goats. Where was this

647
00:29:58,400 --> 00:30:01,920
Speaker 1: in Austria? Oh my god? And so it's right from me.

648
00:30:02,040 --> 00:30:05,240
Speaker 1: It's literally if you were behind the man about I

649
00:30:05,240 --> 00:30:08,640
Speaker 1: would say, uh, it's a it's a blurry photo. Almost

650
00:30:08,680 --> 00:30:10,760
Speaker 1: looks like I was watching big Foot footogo footage last

651
00:30:10,800 --> 00:30:14,000
Speaker 1: night because my friend believes in Bigfoot and told me

652
00:30:14,040 --> 00:30:16,240
Speaker 1: that it's like this person is a smart person who

653
00:30:16,280 --> 00:30:17,800
Speaker 1: I trust, and he believes in Bigfoot, and he was

654
00:30:17,800 --> 00:30:20,400
Speaker 1: showing me big Foot foo footage from cameras like this

655
00:30:20,440 --> 00:30:23,200
Speaker 1: where they like, you know, they're on an eagle's nest

656
00:30:23,240 --> 00:30:25,120
Speaker 1: and they're like, oh, you can watch baby eagles. And

657
00:30:25,160 --> 00:30:27,520
Speaker 1: then in the background of foot watch by that guy

658
00:30:27,600 --> 00:30:31,560
Speaker 1: it's directly behind this tale ass Austrian dude, and he's

659
00:30:31,600 --> 00:30:33,400
Speaker 1: doing said the girl, you can't even see here. It

660
00:30:33,440 --> 00:30:37,800
Speaker 1: looks like he's um playing uh you know, what's that

661
00:30:37,880 --> 00:30:39,920
Speaker 1: game where you spend the thing and you put on

662
00:30:40,000 --> 00:30:43,200
Speaker 1: hair on red dot twist. It looks like he's playing

663
00:30:43,200 --> 00:30:46,200
Speaker 1: Twister on a towel. I mean what's great is it's

664
00:30:46,200 --> 00:30:48,479
Speaker 1: every twenty minutes. So were they fucking for you know,

665
00:30:49,240 --> 00:30:51,800
Speaker 1: one minutes or were they fucking you know? I wonder

666
00:30:51,840 --> 00:30:56,480
Speaker 1: how you know if it's caught at both times? Yeah, um,

667
00:30:56,520 --> 00:30:59,200
Speaker 1: I love this and good for them, and I wonder, Yeah,

668
00:30:59,240 --> 00:31:02,320
Speaker 1: you can't see who that guy is. That could be anyone,

669
00:31:02,800 --> 00:31:05,000
Speaker 1: but or he may be lost to contact. And he's

670
00:31:05,000 --> 00:31:07,160
Speaker 1: honest because you can't see the girl and he's just

671
00:31:07,320 --> 00:31:09,760
Speaker 1: he got naked to look for his contact. Man, I

672
00:31:09,800 --> 00:31:12,960
Speaker 1: did a yeah, I got it's about the way to find.

673
00:31:13,000 --> 00:31:17,080
Speaker 1: It makes you want to get up there. Huh yeah,

674
00:31:17,200 --> 00:31:19,240
Speaker 1: you know what. It's changing everything I think about hiking

675
00:31:19,280 --> 00:31:24,320
Speaker 1: and travel. Um, bring it on, that's what I did say,

676
00:31:24,360 --> 00:31:26,000
Speaker 1: like I want to go bang out in the That's

677
00:31:26,000 --> 00:31:27,680
Speaker 1: why I Noah put that in their cut down. My god,

678
00:31:27,760 --> 00:31:30,360
Speaker 1: you know how many Google maps there's probably someone given

679
00:31:30,400 --> 00:31:32,400
Speaker 1: a like a blow job through a window of a house.

680
00:31:32,920 --> 00:31:35,360
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, for sure. You've got to start that. That's

681
00:31:35,480 --> 00:31:36,800
Speaker 1: that's what you need to do in your life. Start

682
00:31:36,800 --> 00:31:41,080
Speaker 1: combing around Google. There's this really fun thing called um

683
00:31:41,080 --> 00:31:44,200
Speaker 1: It's a fun game where you it's a map of

684
00:31:44,200 --> 00:31:47,680
Speaker 1: the world. They pick a random Google Map image of

685
00:31:47,720 --> 00:31:49,640
Speaker 1: like a road, like a you know, like you know,

686
00:31:49,800 --> 00:31:51,400
Speaker 1: You put it on and then they show the scene

687
00:31:51,720 --> 00:31:53,400
Speaker 1: and you have to guess. You go back to the

688
00:31:53,400 --> 00:31:55,480
Speaker 1: map of the world and you try to guess where

689
00:31:55,520 --> 00:31:57,800
Speaker 1: in the world this is, and then it shows you

690
00:31:57,880 --> 00:31:59,920
Speaker 1: how many miles you get and it's like a game.

691
00:32:00,240 --> 00:32:03,960
Speaker 1: I love this, It's so fun. I'll in the final thought,

692
00:32:03,960 --> 00:32:06,200
Speaker 1: I will tell you what that website is because it's

693
00:32:06,400 --> 00:32:07,880
Speaker 1: I heard someone talking about it the other day. It's

694
00:32:07,960 --> 00:32:10,400
Speaker 1: so fun to play. And it's when you get it close,

695
00:32:10,440 --> 00:32:13,040
Speaker 1: when you're within like a thousand miles, which for the

696
00:32:13,080 --> 00:32:15,920
Speaker 1: world is like close, you're like fuck yeah, you know,

697
00:32:16,120 --> 00:32:18,560
Speaker 1: and you try to guess by like that definitely looks

698
00:32:18,560 --> 00:32:22,040
Speaker 1: like it's not America. So it's it's just it's really fun.

699
00:32:22,120 --> 00:32:25,680
Speaker 1: So we'll tell you about that genocide happening. I know this.

700
00:32:25,960 --> 00:32:32,880
Speaker 1: I noticed genocide down it's mostly water. I wonder if

701
00:32:32,880 --> 00:32:36,960
Speaker 1: they have Google like Google Maps or like you can

702
00:32:37,080 --> 00:32:42,280
Speaker 1: see Google Earth in like you know, Yemen, where there's

703
00:32:42,280 --> 00:32:47,000
Speaker 1: like billions of starving kids. I know they probably don't,

704
00:32:47,320 --> 00:32:52,320
Speaker 1: so I'm guessing, don't click on Yemen. Don't guess. I

705
00:32:52,360 --> 00:32:56,520
Speaker 1: would guess probably. I said Yemen like eighteen times and

706
00:32:56,520 --> 00:33:01,280
Speaker 1: then you said, ye oh oh, I didn't know that. Okay,

707
00:33:01,360 --> 00:33:05,000
Speaker 1: well no man, um, Let's get to the next story,

708
00:33:05,400 --> 00:33:08,760
Speaker 1: all right. The next story, A woman thinks of Florida

709
00:33:08,840 --> 00:33:11,680
Speaker 1: bartender who saved her and her friend from being hit

710
00:33:11,720 --> 00:33:14,280
Speaker 1: on by a creep by passing him a note the

711
00:33:14,320 --> 00:33:17,880
Speaker 1: skies as a receipt. The receipt said, if this guy

712
00:33:17,960 --> 00:33:20,840
Speaker 1: is bothering you, put your ponytail on the other side.

713
00:33:20,840 --> 00:33:23,720
Speaker 1: Of your shoulder and I will have him removed. He's

714
00:33:23,760 --> 00:33:28,040
Speaker 1: giving me the creeps, me the creeps, he said, and

715
00:33:28,120 --> 00:33:30,520
Speaker 1: this guy and there's a picture of this guy. She goes,

716
00:33:30,600 --> 00:33:32,080
Speaker 1: this man was harassing me in my friend and the

717
00:33:32,120 --> 00:33:33,880
Speaker 1: bartender passed this note to me, acting like it was

718
00:33:33,880 --> 00:33:36,120
Speaker 1: my receipt. Legit. The type of legit, the type of

719
00:33:36,120 --> 00:33:39,760
Speaker 1: bartender everyone needs. Love it so cute. Here's the thing.

720
00:33:39,840 --> 00:33:41,280
Speaker 1: Flip your put when you deal to the side. What

721
00:33:41,320 --> 00:33:44,280
Speaker 1: if you were like, but this look doesn't like it's

722
00:33:44,320 --> 00:33:46,920
Speaker 1: the side pone like, it doesn't. What if like you're

723
00:33:46,920 --> 00:33:48,600
Speaker 1: you have a short little bond or something and you

724
00:33:48,600 --> 00:33:53,240
Speaker 1: can't get it over there or um the I will

725
00:33:53,280 --> 00:33:55,800
Speaker 1: say that the mere fact that she even had to

726
00:33:55,880 --> 00:33:58,080
Speaker 1: guess it. There's no way this girl or that he

727
00:33:58,120 --> 00:33:59,959
Speaker 1: had that he noticed this guys creep. There's no way

728
00:34:00,040 --> 00:34:02,160
Speaker 1: this girl was enjoying it. No one. I've never once

729
00:34:02,200 --> 00:34:05,680
Speaker 1: been seeing guy hit on a girl and been like

730
00:34:05,760 --> 00:34:07,800
Speaker 1: she's annoyed and been like, do I need to ask

731
00:34:07,800 --> 00:34:10,240
Speaker 1: her for help? But but actually that's true because sometimes

732
00:34:10,239 --> 00:34:11,680
Speaker 1: people are like, do you want me to get you

733
00:34:11,719 --> 00:34:13,439
Speaker 1: away from this guy? And I'm like, I love this guy.

734
00:34:14,040 --> 00:34:17,680
Speaker 1: Carlyle Carlyle, yesterday I was telling people at a party

735
00:34:17,760 --> 00:34:19,400
Speaker 1: or the other night at Ben Glee's party, she was

736
00:34:19,440 --> 00:34:22,200
Speaker 1: telling about some um comedians she's been trying to like

737
00:34:22,360 --> 00:34:24,600
Speaker 1: pet She's friends with him, but she knows how annoying

738
00:34:24,640 --> 00:34:26,799
Speaker 1: he is, so she goes, do you want to stand?

739
00:34:27,040 --> 00:34:30,040
Speaker 1: She's something? Someone she goes For years, I've been trying

740
00:34:30,080 --> 00:34:32,120
Speaker 1: to keep him away from Nikki and protect her so

741
00:34:32,280 --> 00:34:34,440
Speaker 1: she doesn't have to meet this guy because he's so annoying.

742
00:34:34,640 --> 00:34:36,759
Speaker 1: I've been for years, Nicky. You don't even know the

743
00:34:36,840 --> 00:34:39,920
Speaker 1: efforts I've made. But somehow it finally happened. And I

744
00:34:40,040 --> 00:34:42,200
Speaker 1: come up and Ninki he's got Nicki in the corner

745
00:34:42,320 --> 00:34:44,840
Speaker 1: and he's talking to her. And I was like, oh no,

746
00:34:45,360 --> 00:34:47,200
Speaker 1: I failed. And I didn't even know she was keeping

747
00:34:47,239 --> 00:34:48,839
Speaker 1: me from this guy. And she goes and I walked

748
00:34:48,920 --> 00:34:51,080
Speaker 1: up and uh, and Nicki finally got free and I

749
00:34:51,160 --> 00:34:52,560
Speaker 1: go up and I'm like, oh my god, I'm so sorry,

750
00:34:52,560 --> 00:34:54,320
Speaker 1: and I go I love that guy, and she's like, so,

751
00:34:54,440 --> 00:34:55,840
Speaker 1: I don't know what to do with you, and I go,

752
00:34:56,120 --> 00:34:58,880
Speaker 1: that guy was fucking great. And I go, literally, Carlyle,

753
00:34:58,920 --> 00:35:01,120
Speaker 1: anyone who your friend with who might be annoying I'm

754
00:35:01,160 --> 00:35:04,480
Speaker 1: gonna like I have annoying friends. I'm annoying. But if

755
00:35:04,600 --> 00:35:06,919
Speaker 1: if it's a good person and he's annoying, I'm gonna

756
00:35:07,000 --> 00:35:13,880
Speaker 1: like you. But it was just so funny. That's just funny.

757
00:35:13,880 --> 00:35:15,719
Speaker 1: If it was like some like gorgeous man that you

758
00:35:15,719 --> 00:35:18,759
Speaker 1: would definitely date. And she's like, I gotta keep him, yes,

759
00:35:19,400 --> 00:35:23,840
Speaker 1: because I do have different tastes. And no, he's just

760
00:35:24,200 --> 00:35:27,239
Speaker 1: he's just like an overly like excited open micro kind

761
00:35:27,239 --> 00:35:30,160
Speaker 1: of not even open micro like comic. But he's sweet

762
00:35:30,680 --> 00:35:34,560
Speaker 1: and I hear he's funny and I just love his enthusiasm. Uh,

763
00:35:34,840 --> 00:35:37,120
Speaker 1: he's just great. So she had it wrong, and I go,

764
00:35:37,320 --> 00:35:39,440
Speaker 1: I go, don't protect me. I go, I can protect myself.

765
00:35:39,520 --> 00:35:42,080
Speaker 1: I really appreciate it, but don't go to valiant efforts

766
00:35:42,160 --> 00:35:44,600
Speaker 1: behind my back to protect me from someone. I'm a

767
00:35:44,680 --> 00:35:46,799
Speaker 1: big girl. And I go, that's really nice, but don't

768
00:35:46,880 --> 00:35:51,000
Speaker 1: do that. I'm sure someone. Yeah, I go, can I

769
00:35:51,080 --> 00:35:53,400
Speaker 1: get him to hang out with me more? So? I

770
00:35:53,440 --> 00:35:55,600
Speaker 1: don't want to talk to you. Carla was so funny

771
00:35:55,640 --> 00:35:57,880
Speaker 1: the other night. I love her so much. She um,

772
00:35:58,080 --> 00:36:00,719
Speaker 1: we go to Ben Bleep's party. Yeah. Uh And on

773
00:36:01,000 --> 00:36:03,800
Speaker 1: Saturday night, so much fun I can't even believe I

774
00:36:03,840 --> 00:36:05,480
Speaker 1: will be telling you about Ben Gleave's party for the

775
00:36:05,560 --> 00:36:08,200
Speaker 1: rest of time. He had a birthday party that I

776
00:36:08,320 --> 00:36:11,200
Speaker 1: co hosted. I have to um, and that means like

777
00:36:11,239 --> 00:36:13,839
Speaker 1: I'm I offered to pay for a lot of like, uh,

778
00:36:14,200 --> 00:36:16,040
Speaker 1: I want to pay for all of it because it

779
00:36:16,160 --> 00:36:17,640
Speaker 1: was just such a fun night. My parents had a

780
00:36:17,719 --> 00:36:21,080
Speaker 1: great time. He had a food truck, he had um bartenders,

781
00:36:21,120 --> 00:36:23,840
Speaker 1: a doorman. He had a scavenger like he had a

782
00:36:24,000 --> 00:36:26,360
Speaker 1: map of the party that he printed up that was

783
00:36:26,400 --> 00:36:28,400
Speaker 1: a scavenger hunt that if someone found the treat at

784
00:36:28,400 --> 00:36:30,799
Speaker 1: the end of the party. He had a weird room

785
00:36:30,880 --> 00:36:33,520
Speaker 1: that had like a shed like thing that was decked

786
00:36:33,560 --> 00:36:36,840
Speaker 1: out with like a Moroccan theme, with pillows and amazing

787
00:36:36,920 --> 00:36:38,759
Speaker 1: lightning with candles that people were like hanging out in

788
00:36:38,800 --> 00:36:41,000
Speaker 1: this room. He had a heated pool that was heated

789
00:36:41,320 --> 00:36:44,000
Speaker 1: like a like a hot tub. It was hot tub pool.

790
00:36:44,120 --> 00:36:46,880
Speaker 1: It was amazing. He had amazing like floats, all the

791
00:36:46,880 --> 00:36:49,040
Speaker 1: different kinds of floats you'd want. He had. I mean,

792
00:36:49,160 --> 00:36:50,680
Speaker 1: it goes on and on this party. It was a

793
00:36:50,800 --> 00:36:54,200
Speaker 1: karaoke room, a dance room, UM, a photo booth. How

794
00:36:54,280 --> 00:36:57,200
Speaker 1: many people were there, I think probably undred and fifty

795
00:36:57,239 --> 00:36:59,880
Speaker 1: over the course of the night. Think was happening at

796
00:36:59,880 --> 00:37:02,400
Speaker 1: the house? No, it wasn't that kind of party. It

797
00:37:02,520 --> 00:37:04,520
Speaker 1: was so much fun. I stayed. I stayed up until

798
00:37:04,640 --> 00:37:08,640
Speaker 1: six am. I left it six I was not drunk

799
00:37:08,800 --> 00:37:11,439
Speaker 1: or high, like I was high, but like, I don't

800
00:37:11,440 --> 00:37:13,640
Speaker 1: like to smoke weed at night. At Like I've been

801
00:37:13,680 --> 00:37:15,359
Speaker 1: smoking weed all day and it energizes me, and then

802
00:37:15,360 --> 00:37:17,800
Speaker 1: at night I'm like, it's like doesn't it doesn't. So

803
00:37:17,880 --> 00:37:20,080
Speaker 1: I was just like having a good time. And um,

804
00:37:20,160 --> 00:37:23,040
Speaker 1: I'll tell you what. My mom goes why we're because

805
00:37:23,080 --> 00:37:24,680
Speaker 1: they my mom wanted to say. She left it to

806
00:37:24,840 --> 00:37:26,560
Speaker 1: thirty because my dad was like, I gotta leave in

807
00:37:26,600 --> 00:37:28,160
Speaker 1: the morning. My mom's staying out here by the way

808
00:37:28,880 --> 00:37:31,080
Speaker 1: so she can go with me tomorrow to um a

809
00:37:31,160 --> 00:37:33,840
Speaker 1: shoot that I'm doing. Uh, and she's being my emotional

810
00:37:33,840 --> 00:37:37,200
Speaker 1: support animal for that shoot. And because it's gonna be

811
00:37:37,239 --> 00:37:41,759
Speaker 1: a triggering day, I'll tell you that fashion and so

812
00:37:42,360 --> 00:37:46,640
Speaker 1: I um. So my mom left and she was like, oh,

813
00:37:46,719 --> 00:37:49,080
Speaker 1: we left, and you like, was it so much fun?

814
00:37:49,160 --> 00:37:50,680
Speaker 1: Would you do? And I go, I stayed until sick

815
00:37:50,680 --> 00:37:52,800
Speaker 1: and she goes, nicky, you've never stapped to sex? And

816
00:37:52,880 --> 00:37:57,640
Speaker 1: I go, I know that is the power boy talking

817
00:37:57,719 --> 00:38:00,360
Speaker 1: to a cute boy. I go, and you he was

818
00:38:00,480 --> 00:38:04,080
Speaker 1: drunk and everyone there is drunk, and when you're sober,

819
00:38:04,160 --> 00:38:07,120
Speaker 1: you just didn't realize how less cool people are that

820
00:38:07,200 --> 00:38:09,840
Speaker 1: you love when they're drunk. But I remember talking to

821
00:38:09,960 --> 00:38:13,120
Speaker 1: him and he's you know, he was being like, you know,

822
00:38:13,320 --> 00:38:15,920
Speaker 1: drunk people they like talk louder, and they'd like say

823
00:38:15,960 --> 00:38:18,200
Speaker 1: that you repeat themselves a lot. And I remember being like,

824
00:38:19,000 --> 00:38:22,239
Speaker 1: I wouldn't tell her the rate this from literally and

825
00:38:22,800 --> 00:38:24,560
Speaker 1: like it could be Tom Hanks and I would go,

826
00:38:24,760 --> 00:38:28,799
Speaker 1: I need to leave. But a boy that is really

827
00:38:28,840 --> 00:38:33,040
Speaker 1: attractive who I like, just want to and he was drunk,

828
00:38:33,080 --> 00:38:35,120
Speaker 1: so he's like, you know, touching me a lot, and

829
00:38:35,200 --> 00:38:38,280
Speaker 1: like like I was just like I will. I started

830
00:38:38,320 --> 00:38:40,279
Speaker 1: hearing the birds chirp. I'm like, I thought it was

831
00:38:40,360 --> 00:38:43,000
Speaker 1: eleven o'clock at night, and I go, that's the power

832
00:38:43,040 --> 00:38:46,560
Speaker 1: of a handsome man. Mom. That's why with the idea

833
00:38:46,600 --> 00:38:50,040
Speaker 1: of like, oh, maybe we'll make out or maybe no, no, no, no,

834
00:38:50,200 --> 00:38:52,239
Speaker 1: he tried to kiss me and I said no, I

835
00:38:52,360 --> 00:38:53,759
Speaker 1: go no, no, no, no, do I go try that

836
00:38:53,800 --> 00:38:58,760
Speaker 1: when you're sober, but no, no, you yeah, yeah, feeling

837
00:38:58,760 --> 00:39:03,520
Speaker 1: out last night. What Yeah, I'll tell you who later. No,

838
00:39:03,680 --> 00:39:05,880
Speaker 1: I just like really want to explore of I just

839
00:39:05,920 --> 00:39:07,839
Speaker 1: want to be this person's friend. We're both going through

840
00:39:08,640 --> 00:39:12,799
Speaker 1: um breakups and like we're both like really getting out

841
00:39:12,840 --> 00:39:14,840
Speaker 1: of something that we both like fell in love for

842
00:39:14,920 --> 00:39:16,839
Speaker 1: the first time in our lives and we're both coming

843
00:39:16,880 --> 00:39:19,560
Speaker 1: out of it and like processing like wait, I didn't

844
00:39:19,600 --> 00:39:22,040
Speaker 1: know you could feel that way, And now what do

845
00:39:22,160 --> 00:39:25,080
Speaker 1: we do? And it's kind of interesting. So it's nice

846
00:39:25,120 --> 00:39:27,040
Speaker 1: because we've we've known each other forever and always had

847
00:39:27,040 --> 00:39:29,200
Speaker 1: a flirtation and now it's just kind of like I

848
00:39:29,560 --> 00:39:33,399
Speaker 1: definitely don't want to enter into anything new, but it's

849
00:39:33,440 --> 00:39:35,600
Speaker 1: just like but the thing is what's nice about it

850
00:39:35,719 --> 00:39:38,719
Speaker 1: is like I just like to touch people that I

851
00:39:38,800 --> 00:39:40,880
Speaker 1: care about and like intimately, and it feels weird to

852
00:39:40,920 --> 00:39:42,960
Speaker 1: do that with like girlfriends. Just like sometimes with girlfriends,

853
00:39:42,960 --> 00:39:45,319
Speaker 1: I'll like hold their hand or stuff like that. But um,

854
00:39:45,880 --> 00:39:49,000
Speaker 1: like like holding a guy's hand, it doesn't mean to

855
00:39:49,200 --> 00:39:51,200
Speaker 1: mean I hope he calls me the next day or

856
00:39:51,200 --> 00:39:53,040
Speaker 1: and he doesn't need to freak out like Nikki wants

857
00:39:53,040 --> 00:39:55,719
Speaker 1: to be my girlfriend. It's like I just go, can

858
00:39:55,800 --> 00:39:58,279
Speaker 1: I just like can we just like touch because I

859
00:39:58,400 --> 00:40:01,120
Speaker 1: just I miss touching someone and it like and it

860
00:40:01,360 --> 00:40:03,520
Speaker 1: feels good and like this doesn't have to mean anything,

861
00:40:03,600 --> 00:40:05,560
Speaker 1: like literally, we don't even have to this doesn't even

862
00:40:05,600 --> 00:40:08,040
Speaker 1: mean something romantic, like I just want like we hung

863
00:40:08,040 --> 00:40:09,600
Speaker 1: out last night. We were just like talking in the

864
00:40:09,680 --> 00:40:11,560
Speaker 1: lobby of my hotel because I just didn't want to

865
00:40:11,880 --> 00:40:13,440
Speaker 1: put it in a situation where it was like in

866
00:40:13,560 --> 00:40:15,320
Speaker 1: the in my room, and so we were just like

867
00:40:15,520 --> 00:40:16,839
Speaker 1: we're in the lobby of the hotel because we got

868
00:40:16,880 --> 00:40:18,600
Speaker 1: kicked out of the bar because it closed, and I

869
00:40:18,719 --> 00:40:20,520
Speaker 1: was just like, can you just like sit next to

870
00:40:20,560 --> 00:40:21,640
Speaker 1: me and we can touch me. I mean we were

871
00:40:21,680 --> 00:40:24,600
Speaker 1: touching last night because you were drunk and like very

872
00:40:24,760 --> 00:40:26,840
Speaker 1: handsy and it was awesome but like I didn't say that,

873
00:40:26,920 --> 00:40:29,680
Speaker 1: but um, and it was just nice to like touch

874
00:40:29,719 --> 00:40:31,880
Speaker 1: and be like, just be honest, like this doesn't have

875
00:40:31,960 --> 00:40:34,160
Speaker 1: to mean anything. It's just we could literally be two

876
00:40:34,320 --> 00:40:37,160
Speaker 1: friends that are like touching. Obviously there's more to it

877
00:40:37,239 --> 00:40:39,920
Speaker 1: than that, but it was just so nice, and um,

878
00:40:40,120 --> 00:40:45,040
Speaker 1: I just feel for the first time, uh, like I'm

879
00:40:45,760 --> 00:40:48,239
Speaker 1: He's someone that I've always pursued and been like I

880
00:40:48,320 --> 00:40:49,880
Speaker 1: want him to like me so bad and now I'm like,

881
00:40:50,600 --> 00:40:52,160
Speaker 1: I'm just in a place with him because he's my friend,

882
00:40:52,200 --> 00:40:55,400
Speaker 1: where I'm like, oh, like, I don't even know if

883
00:40:55,440 --> 00:40:58,600
Speaker 1: I want this. Let's go super duper slow, like the

884
00:40:58,719 --> 00:41:02,200
Speaker 1: slowest I have no I have no agenda, And it's

885
00:41:02,280 --> 00:41:05,279
Speaker 1: like so freeing to be like I don't even know

886
00:41:05,400 --> 00:41:06,960
Speaker 1: I'll see you again. I'm not trying to like stay

887
00:41:06,960 --> 00:41:08,560
Speaker 1: in how longer so I can hang out longer. It's

888
00:41:08,560 --> 00:41:11,759
Speaker 1: just like, yeah, it's like it does. It shouldn't happen

889
00:41:11,880 --> 00:41:14,479
Speaker 1: right now because I am like heartbroken still a little

890
00:41:14,520 --> 00:41:16,560
Speaker 1: bit coming out of it more and more every day.

891
00:41:16,560 --> 00:41:19,800
Speaker 1: I'm like, I don't even honestly, liking a new person

892
00:41:19,920 --> 00:41:22,120
Speaker 1: takes you out of it so much. Maybe if you

893
00:41:22,200 --> 00:41:24,200
Speaker 1: have sex with the guy, maybe maybe you have your

894
00:41:24,239 --> 00:41:26,399
Speaker 1: mom in the room to be there for you. Yeah,

895
00:41:26,480 --> 00:41:28,520
Speaker 1: my mom's staying in town and my dad left, and

896
00:41:28,600 --> 00:41:30,600
Speaker 1: my mom is so cute. She goes, did you hook

897
00:41:30,719 --> 00:41:32,759
Speaker 1: up with that? I told your dad when we left,

898
00:41:32,800 --> 00:41:35,439
Speaker 1: that boy like sneaky, he they're gonna hook I hope

899
00:41:35,440 --> 00:41:36,960
Speaker 1: she doesn't hook up with him because he's you know,

900
00:41:37,400 --> 00:41:40,200
Speaker 1: he was drinking and he wasn't like belligerent or anything,

901
00:41:40,239 --> 00:41:42,000
Speaker 1: but like she was just like, I hope she he

902
00:41:42,960 --> 00:41:45,520
Speaker 1: I can tell he likes her, and she likes him,

903
00:41:45,600 --> 00:41:47,839
Speaker 1: and and the next day she goes, what happened with him?

904
00:41:47,840 --> 00:41:49,640
Speaker 1: And I go, nothing. He tried to kiss me and

905
00:41:49,680 --> 00:41:51,359
Speaker 1: I was like no, and it was like when he's

906
00:41:51,360 --> 00:41:53,640
Speaker 1: ready to kiss me, I was like, thank you, I

907
00:41:53,760 --> 00:41:57,279
Speaker 1: love And we've kissed before. I like, you know, it

908
00:41:57,400 --> 00:42:00,759
Speaker 1: was like eight years ago or something forever go, and

909
00:42:00,880 --> 00:42:02,440
Speaker 1: we kissed, and I liked him so much and want

910
00:42:02,520 --> 00:42:04,080
Speaker 1: him to be my boyfriend. I even told another and

911
00:42:04,120 --> 00:42:06,080
Speaker 1: I go, if you would have been like, let's be

912
00:42:06,160 --> 00:42:08,160
Speaker 1: boyfriend and girlfriend, I would have been like, oh, so,

913
00:42:08,440 --> 00:42:10,920
Speaker 1: I'm glad you didn't. And I honestly hated you for

914
00:42:11,040 --> 00:42:12,879
Speaker 1: so long for it because I was like, why would

915
00:42:12,880 --> 00:42:14,120
Speaker 1: you kiss me and hang out with me and like

916
00:42:14,280 --> 00:42:16,000
Speaker 1: me so much? And I want to be my boyfriend.

917
00:42:16,040 --> 00:42:18,080
Speaker 1: I was like I literally tried to, like I probably

918
00:42:18,120 --> 00:42:19,960
Speaker 1: tried to destroy you as much as I could and

919
00:42:20,080 --> 00:42:22,440
Speaker 1: like not be nice to you and punish you. And

920
00:42:22,520 --> 00:42:24,160
Speaker 1: I just like, don't ever want to do that again.

921
00:42:24,239 --> 00:42:25,399
Speaker 1: I don't even want to do that to the person

922
00:42:25,520 --> 00:42:28,000
Speaker 1: that just broke my heart, Like I don't want to

923
00:42:28,040 --> 00:42:30,160
Speaker 1: be the type of girl that I like being the

924
00:42:30,200 --> 00:42:32,680
Speaker 1: tailor's with of comedy and like working out my frustrations

925
00:42:32,719 --> 00:42:34,920
Speaker 1: with men and my feelings with men and my art.

926
00:42:35,320 --> 00:42:37,279
Speaker 1: But I don't want them to hear it and go

927
00:42:38,200 --> 00:42:42,799
Speaker 1: I feel bad about myself. And because I just want,

928
00:42:43,200 --> 00:42:46,160
Speaker 1: especially someone that I love, I hope that they have

929
00:42:46,239 --> 00:42:48,920
Speaker 1: a good life for you. You don't want to stay spiteful.

930
00:42:49,000 --> 00:42:51,840
Speaker 1: It's so much energy and it takes away from your shine.

931
00:42:53,239 --> 00:42:55,120
Speaker 1: It's just not a good look when people hear you

932
00:42:55,280 --> 00:42:58,439
Speaker 1: bitching and being like moaning and calling a guy gay

933
00:42:58,520 --> 00:43:01,000
Speaker 1: because he didn't like you, or saying he you know

934
00:43:01,239 --> 00:43:03,680
Speaker 1: whatever it is, and and that's just me, you know,

935
00:43:04,120 --> 00:43:06,960
Speaker 1: making a joke, but like having being like a bit

936
00:43:07,040 --> 00:43:08,640
Speaker 1: about it. Like when I used to date a vegan

937
00:43:08,680 --> 00:43:10,440
Speaker 1: guy and I hated him, I would like make it

938
00:43:10,719 --> 00:43:12,320
Speaker 1: and I wasn't even vegan myself, but I used to

939
00:43:12,360 --> 00:43:14,879
Speaker 1: go like, oh he was vegan. Having sex with him

940
00:43:14,920 --> 00:43:18,160
Speaker 1: was like we we would scissor Like I made it like, oh,

941
00:43:18,239 --> 00:43:20,200
Speaker 1: he must be a lesbian because he's vegan, and it

942
00:43:20,320 --> 00:43:22,960
Speaker 1: was just like it was just hurt, you know, and

943
00:43:23,040 --> 00:43:24,360
Speaker 1: it's just not a good look. So I can be

944
00:43:24,520 --> 00:43:26,880
Speaker 1: funny about guys that hurt me in ways, that aren't

945
00:43:26,960 --> 00:43:30,439
Speaker 1: like spiteful and um, and that is a good place

946
00:43:30,520 --> 00:43:32,160
Speaker 1: to be it and it's nice to tell tell this

947
00:43:32,280 --> 00:43:36,439
Speaker 1: person like I used to destroy any guy that hurt

948
00:43:36,480 --> 00:43:38,920
Speaker 1: me intentionally or unintentionally. I used to like have I

949
00:43:39,040 --> 00:43:41,160
Speaker 1: want on one of their life to be hell and

950
00:43:41,280 --> 00:43:43,680
Speaker 1: I don't. And I can tell you that. And so

951
00:43:43,840 --> 00:43:45,800
Speaker 1: that might be like, oh god, I don't want to

952
00:43:45,840 --> 00:43:48,600
Speaker 1: be around this girl that has done that. She and

953
00:43:48,719 --> 00:43:51,759
Speaker 1: she might just be saying, to be honest, I don't

954
00:43:51,800 --> 00:43:54,200
Speaker 1: want to do that anymore. I really don't. And it

955
00:43:54,320 --> 00:43:56,279
Speaker 1: was just nice and he wasn't like I was just

956
00:43:56,360 --> 00:43:59,920
Speaker 1: not like it's not even like I like a guy romantically.

957
00:44:00,000 --> 00:44:02,359
Speaker 1: I just like a person and like like them as

958
00:44:02,400 --> 00:44:04,680
Speaker 1: a friend that I like to have them touch my

959
00:44:04,800 --> 00:44:07,319
Speaker 1: leg and try to kiss me. Um. But the thing

960
00:44:07,320 --> 00:44:08,600
Speaker 1: I was going to say about the drunk before we

961
00:44:08,640 --> 00:44:11,880
Speaker 1: get to the final story, Carlyle was freaking out the

962
00:44:11,960 --> 00:44:14,680
Speaker 1: other night at the party because she was drinking. And

963
00:44:14,719 --> 00:44:17,000
Speaker 1: when we met she was sober and we have always

964
00:44:17,000 --> 00:44:19,879
Speaker 1: smoked pot together. But like she just started drinking again

965
00:44:20,120 --> 00:44:22,600
Speaker 1: and she doesn't it's not like ruining her life like

966
00:44:22,680 --> 00:44:25,880
Speaker 1: it used to. And but she gets a little everyone

967
00:44:25,960 --> 00:44:30,400
Speaker 1: gets louder and more and and repeats themselves. Those are

968
00:44:30,400 --> 00:44:32,640
Speaker 1: the two things, and kind of stupider, and you don't

969
00:44:32,719 --> 00:44:34,520
Speaker 1: like and they don't understand when you talk to them

970
00:44:34,560 --> 00:44:36,200
Speaker 1: as much, they don't. That's the things that happened. When

971
00:44:36,200 --> 00:44:38,000
Speaker 1: people to get a little bit drunk because you have to,

972
00:44:38,320 --> 00:44:41,920
Speaker 1: they get more stupid, They get more like Poppy, remember Poppy,

973
00:44:41,960 --> 00:44:47,040
Speaker 1: my stupid fucking yeah, you throw balls at their heads

974
00:44:47,080 --> 00:44:49,440
Speaker 1: and um. But Carlisle goes, we're on the way home

975
00:44:49,440 --> 00:44:50,799
Speaker 1: because I had to get a ride home from raw

976
00:44:50,840 --> 00:44:52,800
Speaker 1: Do Bondar shout out to rod Do, I love you

977
00:44:52,920 --> 00:44:54,680
Speaker 1: so much. He gave me a ride home from the

978
00:44:54,680 --> 00:44:56,600
Speaker 1: party because you cannot get Uber's past four am, which

979
00:44:56,600 --> 00:44:58,040
Speaker 1: I didn't know, so I was stranded in the valley.

980
00:44:58,360 --> 00:45:00,200
Speaker 1: Rod Do gives me a ride home. I'm in the

981
00:45:00,280 --> 00:45:02,480
Speaker 1: worst mood because I'm tired and I'm mad that I

982
00:45:02,520 --> 00:45:06,120
Speaker 1: stayed until sun up. Um, I'm like, I was just

983
00:45:06,200 --> 00:45:08,120
Speaker 1: in a bad mood and and it wasn't because of

984
00:45:08,400 --> 00:45:09,799
Speaker 1: the boy or anything. I was just like, oh, I'm

985
00:45:09,800 --> 00:45:11,480
Speaker 1: so disgusting. Why to say up all night like I

986
00:45:11,520 --> 00:45:13,920
Speaker 1: have to get up early to morrow and um, and

987
00:45:14,000 --> 00:45:17,120
Speaker 1: Carlos in the back seat like, oh, the seatbelt didn't

988
00:45:17,120 --> 00:45:21,719
Speaker 1: work because she was there and we went swimming and stuff. Yeah,

989
00:45:21,760 --> 00:45:23,640
Speaker 1: we were just hanging out. It was so fun. It

990
00:45:23,719 --> 00:45:25,960
Speaker 1: was the party was still kicking until eight am, like

991
00:45:26,160 --> 00:45:28,120
Speaker 1: that was still making drinks for people. He's so fun.

992
00:45:28,880 --> 00:45:31,880
Speaker 1: So Carlyle was like because I was talking about how

993
00:45:31,920 --> 00:45:34,200
Speaker 1: annoying drunk people were and on the way home, and

994
00:45:34,280 --> 00:45:36,200
Speaker 1: Carlo was like, I'm just feel like I just like

995
00:45:36,239 --> 00:45:37,759
Speaker 1: didn't even want to be around you because you're like

996
00:45:37,880 --> 00:45:40,040
Speaker 1: they're gonna hate me. And I was like, babe, I

997
00:45:40,960 --> 00:45:44,200
Speaker 1: will never hate you, like I don't. It's not gonna happen. Like, yes,

998
00:45:44,239 --> 00:45:46,400
Speaker 1: you're a little bit more annoying, but I you were

999
00:45:46,440 --> 00:45:47,799
Speaker 1: avoiding me if I didn't even know she was at

1000
00:45:47,800 --> 00:45:49,359
Speaker 1: the party because she was avoiding me because she was drinking.

1001
00:45:49,400 --> 00:45:52,279
Speaker 1: And I go, and I was a little annoyed at

1002
00:45:52,640 --> 00:45:55,279
Speaker 1: some stuff that she like, my mom got a little drunk.

1003
00:45:55,320 --> 00:45:56,960
Speaker 1: My like the guy was talking to it was a

1004
00:45:56,960 --> 00:45:58,919
Speaker 1: little drunk. I was annoyed everyone that got a little drunk,

1005
00:45:58,920 --> 00:46:02,480
Speaker 1: including Carlyle. But it was it's not I go. I

1006
00:46:02,560 --> 00:46:04,839
Speaker 1: can always. I'm gonna let it slide tomorrow. Nothing you're

1007
00:46:04,880 --> 00:46:06,040
Speaker 1: gonna do. It's gonna make me not want to be

1008
00:46:06,120 --> 00:46:08,040
Speaker 1: friends with you, and she got we were driving home

1009
00:46:08,040 --> 00:46:11,000
Speaker 1: and she was like, I'm gonna fucking wake up tomorrow

1010
00:46:11,040 --> 00:46:13,879
Speaker 1: and have so much anxiety and feel so bad about

1011
00:46:13,920 --> 00:46:16,120
Speaker 1: how I acted tonight. And I woke up at like

1012
00:46:16,280 --> 00:46:17,960
Speaker 1: eleven the next day and I sent her a voice

1013
00:46:18,040 --> 00:46:20,920
Speaker 1: memo that was like, I need to let you know

1014
00:46:21,320 --> 00:46:24,800
Speaker 1: that I love you. Are great, and you are so

1015
00:46:25,040 --> 00:46:27,160
Speaker 1: funny and so fun and when you get a little drunk,

1016
00:46:27,520 --> 00:46:30,000
Speaker 1: you're not a bad person, you are not embarrassing. Let

1017
00:46:30,080 --> 00:46:32,200
Speaker 1: yourself off of the hook. You had fun last night.

1018
00:46:32,680 --> 00:46:34,000
Speaker 1: And she was like, I need to hear this. I'm like,

1019
00:46:34,000 --> 00:46:35,680
Speaker 1: I wish I would have woken up earlier to tell you,

1020
00:46:35,800 --> 00:46:37,680
Speaker 1: because I was such a bitch last night that she

1021
00:46:38,000 --> 00:46:40,080
Speaker 1: probably thought I was mad at her. But I just

1022
00:46:40,120 --> 00:46:42,239
Speaker 1: want to say I love Carlile Forrester. I would love

1023
00:46:42,320 --> 00:46:45,520
Speaker 1: if you would support her Patreon Carlile Forrester and like

1024
00:46:45,640 --> 00:46:47,960
Speaker 1: follow her on Instagram. She's funny as fucking, she's hot

1025
00:46:48,040 --> 00:46:50,360
Speaker 1: as fun and she's one of my best friends. Hilarious

1026
00:46:50,400 --> 00:46:53,120
Speaker 1: comedian and I would really appreciate you. And you will

1027
00:46:53,200 --> 00:46:56,320
Speaker 1: see how crazy and homeless and scary West Hollywood is

1028
00:46:56,600 --> 00:46:59,720
Speaker 1: she films the alley that is behind outside her bedroom

1029
00:46:59,760 --> 00:47:02,880
Speaker 1: wind and there's fires and bums like shitting on the

1030
00:47:03,200 --> 00:47:06,239
Speaker 1: you know, on the road right outside her window. Which,

1031
00:47:06,280 --> 00:47:08,560
Speaker 1: by the way, I made a joke about homelessness on

1032
00:47:08,719 --> 00:47:10,560
Speaker 1: on Bill mart and I got some about it. Yeah,

1033
00:47:11,400 --> 00:47:15,000
Speaker 1: but it wasn't even it was funny. I don't whatever. Yeah, whatever,

1034
00:47:15,719 --> 00:47:19,000
Speaker 1: next story, alcohol, though, Why do you think it hits

1035
00:47:19,000 --> 00:47:23,480
Speaker 1: you so hard? Because like just dealing with being drunk,

1036
00:47:24,120 --> 00:47:27,959
Speaker 1: because thanks for asking that, because you know, I because

1037
00:47:28,000 --> 00:47:31,040
Speaker 1: it makes people louder, not listen to what I'm saying.

1038
00:47:31,320 --> 00:47:32,800
Speaker 1: I tell them stories that I have to repeat the

1039
00:47:32,880 --> 00:47:35,919
Speaker 1: next time I see them. They aren't It's just your

1040
00:47:36,120 --> 00:47:39,239
Speaker 1: Your friends get dumb. Alcohol does not make you more fun.

1041
00:47:39,400 --> 00:47:42,480
Speaker 1: You get more fun because you're stupider. Doesn't give you courage.

1042
00:47:42,560 --> 00:47:45,279
Speaker 1: You guys, doesn't you talk to the girl that you'd

1043
00:47:45,280 --> 00:47:47,160
Speaker 1: be scared to talk to because you're dumber? You know what?

1044
00:47:47,280 --> 00:47:49,799
Speaker 1: Dumb people? I was talking about this the other day.

1045
00:47:50,040 --> 00:47:51,880
Speaker 1: I get hit on and asked out in my d

1046
00:47:52,040 --> 00:47:53,640
Speaker 1: MS all the time. I guys are like I saw

1047
00:47:53,680 --> 00:47:55,680
Speaker 1: you in Rogan. I just I've never felt like I've

1048
00:47:55,719 --> 00:47:57,640
Speaker 1: never heard someone talk to what you talk I really,

1049
00:47:57,760 --> 00:47:59,560
Speaker 1: I know you like need a boyfriend. I would love

1050
00:47:59,600 --> 00:48:01,160
Speaker 1: to take you. And this guy lives in Des Moines

1051
00:48:01,560 --> 00:48:04,480
Speaker 1: and is disgusting by the way, like not attractive, like

1052
00:48:05,160 --> 00:48:08,839
Speaker 1: it's it boggles my and and I'm sorry to hey,

1053
00:48:08,920 --> 00:48:11,160
Speaker 1: I was drunk last night. They have three kids. No, no, no,

1054
00:48:11,320 --> 00:48:13,359
Speaker 1: they have three kids. Know they're sincerely shooting their shot,

1055
00:48:13,400 --> 00:48:14,560
Speaker 1: and they're like, when you're in town, I would love

1056
00:48:14,600 --> 00:48:16,680
Speaker 1: to take you out, And I go, what in your

1057
00:48:16,760 --> 00:48:19,400
Speaker 1: mind thinks that I'm going to be your girlfriend? You

1058
00:48:19,480 --> 00:48:23,319
Speaker 1: live for when you live in Des Moines and your

1059
00:48:23,480 --> 00:48:26,440
Speaker 1: accountless private, so I can only see the weird close up,

1060
00:48:26,520 --> 00:48:30,640
Speaker 1: grainy photo of you with some weird you know, sunglasses

1061
00:48:30,719 --> 00:48:33,320
Speaker 1: that have like the purple tint on that like, I

1062
00:48:33,360 --> 00:48:36,480
Speaker 1: would never date a guy. It's what you're insane to

1063
00:48:36,560 --> 00:48:38,200
Speaker 1: think that you would like. And then the guys that

1064
00:48:38,440 --> 00:48:40,279
Speaker 1: I would go out with would never ask me out

1065
00:48:40,360 --> 00:48:42,719
Speaker 1: like that because they either are intimidated or like that's

1066
00:48:42,719 --> 00:48:44,879
Speaker 1: such a weird thing to do. So you only get

1067
00:48:45,280 --> 00:48:48,480
Speaker 1: I tend to think, am I not aware of what

1068
00:48:48,600 --> 00:48:50,719
Speaker 1: I deserve? Is this what I deserve? Because it's only

1069
00:48:50,800 --> 00:48:52,719
Speaker 1: guys that look like that and talk like that that

1070
00:48:52,760 --> 00:48:55,520
Speaker 1: are asking me out. So I go, am I like

1071
00:48:55,760 --> 00:48:59,279
Speaker 1: a four and I think I'm a comedy nine. And

1072
00:48:59,360 --> 00:49:01,399
Speaker 1: the truth is, I it's not that I think. It's

1073
00:49:01,480 --> 00:49:04,279
Speaker 1: those guys are dumb guys and and not. And I'm

1074
00:49:04,320 --> 00:49:07,880
Speaker 1: not being um mean when I say dumb, they you

1075
00:49:07,960 --> 00:49:10,719
Speaker 1: know they just aren't. I'm not being um what's it

1076
00:49:10,800 --> 00:49:14,560
Speaker 1: called when I'm being dumb? Right now? You're negatively connotated.

1077
00:49:14,640 --> 00:49:18,160
Speaker 1: I when some when I say someone's dumb, I'm not

1078
00:49:18,239 --> 00:49:20,200
Speaker 1: as smart as Meal de gross Tyson. He could call

1079
00:49:20,280 --> 00:49:22,840
Speaker 1: me dumb, like if someone's less intelligent or like doesn't.

1080
00:49:23,320 --> 00:49:25,719
Speaker 1: So when you get dumber when you drink, it makes

1081
00:49:25,760 --> 00:49:28,839
Speaker 1: you dumber and you take chances that these dumb guys take,

1082
00:49:29,280 --> 00:49:31,279
Speaker 1: and it does it's not and it makes some of

1083
00:49:31,360 --> 00:49:33,520
Speaker 1: that is good because that's what you really feel. But

1084
00:49:33,719 --> 00:49:36,880
Speaker 1: you know, I was with a guy on Saturday night

1085
00:49:37,000 --> 00:49:39,160
Speaker 1: who tried to kiss me and then I see him sober,

1086
00:49:39,600 --> 00:49:42,520
Speaker 1: and he sits across the table from me catty corner

1087
00:49:42,719 --> 00:49:46,440
Speaker 1: as far as he can because it's like and and uh,

1088
00:49:46,480 --> 00:49:48,120
Speaker 1: and I go, you're drunk. You know that night? I go,

1089
00:49:48,239 --> 00:49:50,800
Speaker 1: you're drunk and like that there and and he was like, no,

1090
00:49:51,440 --> 00:49:53,080
Speaker 1: I get honest when I'm drunk, and I'm like, I

1091
00:49:53,200 --> 00:49:55,759
Speaker 1: don't believe that, because I think the honest person is

1092
00:49:55,800 --> 00:49:58,200
Speaker 1: the sober person being like, I'm not ready to make

1093
00:49:58,280 --> 00:50:00,600
Speaker 1: this move on her. I'm a little nervous. Then nervousness

1094
00:50:00,800 --> 00:50:02,880
Speaker 1: is what sometimes you need to combat that and overcome

1095
00:50:02,920 --> 00:50:06,160
Speaker 1: your nerves. But that's your body telling you, like, maybe

1096
00:50:06,560 --> 00:50:09,279
Speaker 1: hold on. So when you get dumber when you drink,

1097
00:50:09,360 --> 00:50:11,520
Speaker 1: it's not actually courage. And that's what got me to

1098
00:50:11,600 --> 00:50:13,640
Speaker 1: quit drinking, is to realize all the things I thought

1099
00:50:13,640 --> 00:50:17,200
Speaker 1: I was getting from drinking, more social, more comfortable, I'm

1100
00:50:17,280 --> 00:50:20,160
Speaker 1: just more dumb because dumb people are comfortable. And maybe

1101
00:50:20,239 --> 00:50:22,799
Speaker 1: that's a good thing. But when my friends drink, When

1102
00:50:22,800 --> 00:50:25,120
Speaker 1: my friends have more than one point three drinks, one

1103
00:50:25,160 --> 00:50:27,640
Speaker 1: point three, they're up until one point three drinks, they're great.

1104
00:50:27,880 --> 00:50:31,040
Speaker 1: Literally the sip that makes it one point three four

1105
00:50:32,360 --> 00:50:35,479
Speaker 1: I they get louder in my face so it hurts

1106
00:50:35,600 --> 00:50:38,080
Speaker 1: my face. Their breath they're not aware of their breath

1107
00:50:38,160 --> 00:50:40,760
Speaker 1: stinking in my face. And and this is not Carlyle,

1108
00:50:40,800 --> 00:50:42,520
Speaker 1: if you're listening, this is not about you. You always

1109
00:50:42,520 --> 00:50:44,439
Speaker 1: I've never smelled your breath before ever. You always smell

1110
00:50:44,480 --> 00:50:48,280
Speaker 1: good and um, and they get and they don't remember

1111
00:50:48,320 --> 00:50:49,759
Speaker 1: the things you say, and you have to repeat yourself

1112
00:50:49,800 --> 00:50:51,920
Speaker 1: a bunch. I don't judge them, and I don't hate them,

1113
00:50:51,960 --> 00:50:53,719
Speaker 1: but it's my choice to leave. I would have left

1114
00:50:53,760 --> 00:50:56,160
Speaker 1: this party a lot sooner if the drunk guy I

1115
00:50:56,280 --> 00:50:59,759
Speaker 1: was talking to wasn't so freaking handsome and you know,

1116
00:51:00,080 --> 00:51:04,440
Speaker 1: is like complex and interesting. Even The only thing that

1117
00:51:04,480 --> 00:51:07,719
Speaker 1: I would say is like, sometimes if I had a

1118
00:51:07,800 --> 00:51:09,759
Speaker 1: situation like that where the person was drunk and I

1119
00:51:09,920 --> 00:51:12,360
Speaker 1: wasn't drunk, a little bit of me would be like, gosh,

1120
00:51:12,400 --> 00:51:14,800
Speaker 1: I wish I was maybe had one point five drinks,

1121
00:51:14,840 --> 00:51:17,279
Speaker 1: so I my inhibitions would be gone, so I'd have

1122
00:51:17,400 --> 00:51:19,840
Speaker 1: a fun romp and I'd have a fun story of

1123
00:51:19,920 --> 00:51:22,040
Speaker 1: how I had sex in a shed or whatever. No,

1124
00:51:22,200 --> 00:51:24,759
Speaker 1: I totally agree with you, and then you just wake

1125
00:51:24,880 --> 00:51:27,560
Speaker 1: up and you kind of regret it. But I'm just saying, like,

1126
00:51:27,640 --> 00:51:31,719
Speaker 1: those are like things. When she was saying, oh my god,

1127
00:51:31,760 --> 00:51:33,480
Speaker 1: I asked acted so stupid, I was so loud, I

1128
00:51:33,520 --> 00:51:35,480
Speaker 1: was probably so annoying blah blah, because she's hearing me

1129
00:51:35,560 --> 00:51:37,839
Speaker 1: talk about how annoying every drunk person is the party.

1130
00:51:37,880 --> 00:51:39,560
Speaker 1: On the way home, I'm just like bitching about like

1131
00:51:39,680 --> 00:51:41,120
Speaker 1: because I was in a bad mood and I wasn't

1132
00:51:41,160 --> 00:51:43,960
Speaker 1: being very compassionate as I am now. So it's just

1133
00:51:44,040 --> 00:51:45,920
Speaker 1: like I'm just I can't be around my friends when

1134
00:51:45,920 --> 00:51:48,200
Speaker 1: they're drunk anymore. I just can't do it because they're

1135
00:51:48,239 --> 00:51:50,279
Speaker 1: just It's not because I'm like I want to be drunk.

1136
00:51:50,320 --> 00:51:53,200
Speaker 1: It's like, it's just it's just exhaust It's like babysitting,

1137
00:51:53,280 --> 00:51:54,680
Speaker 1: you know. It's just like kind of being stuck in

1138
00:51:54,760 --> 00:51:58,239
Speaker 1: a bad conversation with someone you love and um, and

1139
00:51:58,360 --> 00:51:59,919
Speaker 1: she goes, I was such an idiot, I go, Carl.

1140
00:52:01,000 --> 00:52:03,279
Speaker 1: Everyone at that party was just as drunk as you are,

1141
00:52:03,520 --> 00:52:05,799
Speaker 1: and they're all having those thoughts about themselves. So let

1142
00:52:05,880 --> 00:52:07,800
Speaker 1: yourself off the hook that, Yeah, when you go to

1143
00:52:07,840 --> 00:52:09,920
Speaker 1: a party, you act drunk. Most people are drunk. Yeah

1144
00:52:09,920 --> 00:52:12,239
Speaker 1: I'm the sober one judging you. But let me tell you,

1145
00:52:12,800 --> 00:52:15,200
Speaker 1: I anyone who gets drunk, I have been a drunk

1146
00:52:15,239 --> 00:52:19,279
Speaker 1: idiot before. One more story the other night, and I

1147
00:52:19,440 --> 00:52:22,200
Speaker 1: hope my parents don't hear this, but it's actually a

1148
00:52:22,239 --> 00:52:26,560
Speaker 1: good story. We're backstage at Supernova and I'm bringing I'm

1149
00:52:26,680 --> 00:52:28,800
Speaker 1: toting my parents along. It's the night before, it's the

1150
00:52:28,920 --> 00:52:31,200
Speaker 1: night before Bill Maher and I'm doing three sets. It's

1151
00:52:31,239 --> 00:52:33,759
Speaker 1: just like from set to set, and we get to

1152
00:52:33,840 --> 00:52:36,080
Speaker 1: set in in the back of the room, Kevin Neilan

1153
00:52:36,160 --> 00:52:39,520
Speaker 1: walks into the door. My parents are huge Kevin Delon fans.

1154
00:52:39,560 --> 00:52:42,360
Speaker 1: I mean weeds down to SNL that like to his

1155
00:52:42,560 --> 00:52:45,080
Speaker 1: They followed him on Instagram for his art and my

1156
00:52:45,200 --> 00:52:46,800
Speaker 1: dad looks like Kevin Neil and my dad has always

1157
00:52:46,800 --> 00:52:48,840
Speaker 1: reminded me of Kevin Neil and Kevin Neilan Wilson. They

1158
00:52:48,880 --> 00:52:50,880
Speaker 1: know I'm friends with him, and I'm like, Kevin fucking

1159
00:52:51,080 --> 00:52:52,680
Speaker 1: and I'm like, yes, Heria, and I like I'll get

1160
00:52:52,719 --> 00:52:53,960
Speaker 1: and I'm like, these are my parents. And he's like,

1161
00:52:54,000 --> 00:52:56,560
Speaker 1: I know you as he's just like so charming. And

1162
00:52:56,640 --> 00:52:58,640
Speaker 1: my dad's like, it was like, we actually saw you

1163
00:52:58,840 --> 00:53:03,239
Speaker 1: perform at in Cincinnati in nineteen whatever, nineteen o one,

1164
00:53:04,040 --> 00:53:07,439
Speaker 1: and uh and uh, he goes, you probably don't remember.

1165
00:53:07,440 --> 00:53:09,640
Speaker 1: It was a Riverfront downs and and he goes, I

1166
00:53:09,719 --> 00:53:11,839
Speaker 1: think it was I was with Gary and he was like, yeah,

1167
00:53:11,880 --> 00:53:13,840
Speaker 1: Gary Shandling was in there, like yeah, Gary Shandling is

1168
00:53:13,880 --> 00:53:15,759
Speaker 1: on the show. And he goes, I used to be

1169
00:53:15,960 --> 00:53:17,600
Speaker 1: like I worked at a cable company, so we were

1170
00:53:17,760 --> 00:53:20,120
Speaker 1: you know backstage and we met Gary and oh my god,

1171
00:53:20,200 --> 00:53:22,040
Speaker 1: Julie did the most embarrassing my mom sitting there and

1172
00:53:22,080 --> 00:53:24,880
Speaker 1: he tells a story about my mom embarrassing him in

1173
00:53:24,960 --> 00:53:27,279
Speaker 1: front of Gary Schandling because she was my mom was

1174
00:53:27,360 --> 00:53:30,880
Speaker 1: drunk and um just maybe trying to like out of

1175
00:53:31,080 --> 00:53:33,640
Speaker 1: like feeling uncomfortable, so she like bragged to Gary Shandling

1176
00:53:33,760 --> 00:53:35,600
Speaker 1: that my dad was like a cable executive. She was like,

1177
00:53:35,880 --> 00:53:39,000
Speaker 1: he's the like you know, he's bragging to him and

1178
00:53:39,400 --> 00:53:42,280
Speaker 1: it embarrassed my dad and he was like, I'm sure, Gary,

1179
00:53:42,440 --> 00:53:45,279
Speaker 1: and it went back and made fun of you. And

1180
00:53:45,400 --> 00:53:47,399
Speaker 1: he's like, always makes my mom feel bad about the story.

1181
00:53:47,400 --> 00:53:49,279
Speaker 1: I've heard the story like dozens of times in my

1182
00:53:49,360 --> 00:53:51,239
Speaker 1: life and it's always my mom was always like I

1183
00:53:51,280 --> 00:53:52,960
Speaker 1: don't want to hear it's so embarrassing. I didn't mean

1184
00:53:53,000 --> 00:53:55,040
Speaker 1: to and I'm always just like, shut the funk up down,

1185
00:53:55,080 --> 00:53:56,640
Speaker 1: I'm just so annoyed. And why would you say this

1186
00:53:56,680 --> 00:53:59,080
Speaker 1: part of Kevin Ellen where we just met two minutes ago,

1187
00:53:59,160 --> 00:54:01,080
Speaker 1: just say you met Gary Handling without the story about

1188
00:54:01,120 --> 00:54:04,200
Speaker 1: mom being wasted and embarrassing you and saying embarrassing things.

1189
00:54:04,640 --> 00:54:06,840
Speaker 1: So literally tells that story and to go, well, it

1190
00:54:06,920 --> 00:54:10,000
Speaker 1: must run in our family because I said the most

1191
00:54:10,200 --> 00:54:14,200
Speaker 1: embarrassing drunk stuff to David Tell when I met him,

1192
00:54:14,760 --> 00:54:17,200
Speaker 1: and I go, Mom, you would not believe the stuff

1193
00:54:17,200 --> 00:54:18,440
Speaker 1: I said. And then I told the story of how

1194
00:54:18,480 --> 00:54:20,719
Speaker 1: I embarrassed myself in front David Tell when I was drunk,

1195
00:54:21,120 --> 00:54:24,719
Speaker 1: and and I think, God, I had that story to

1196
00:54:24,760 --> 00:54:27,879
Speaker 1: build my mom out. But like, if you're a drunk

1197
00:54:27,920 --> 00:54:31,879
Speaker 1: person you've done something embarrassing, forgive yourself. I forgive myself

1198
00:54:31,920 --> 00:54:33,799
Speaker 1: for the dump stuff I've done. And don't make your

1199
00:54:33,840 --> 00:54:36,000
Speaker 1: friends feel bad about it, because the only reason you're

1200
00:54:36,040 --> 00:54:38,600
Speaker 1: doing that is because you're embarrassed by stuff you've done

1201
00:54:38,880 --> 00:54:41,000
Speaker 1: and you want to make their thing worse so that

1202
00:54:41,120 --> 00:54:44,839
Speaker 1: years feels better. So trying not to embarrass people. Uh,

1203
00:54:45,040 --> 00:54:47,840
Speaker 1: And I told that dad, everyone's because he Then my

1204
00:54:47,920 --> 00:54:50,719
Speaker 1: mom brought up something that my dad was like, I

1205
00:54:50,760 --> 00:54:53,319
Speaker 1: think she had thought my dad was flirting with one.

1206
00:54:54,360 --> 00:54:56,359
Speaker 1: I just was saying that I love that. Your mom

1207
00:54:56,480 --> 00:55:01,680
Speaker 1: was like, oh, he's the best awning man. Now, No,

1208
00:55:01,840 --> 00:55:03,920
Speaker 1: my mom was so proud of him. I'm sure it's

1209
00:55:03,920 --> 00:55:05,840
Speaker 1: just embarrassed that my mom was even trying to like

1210
00:55:05,920 --> 00:55:07,399
Speaker 1: talk him up in front of it. But it wasn't

1211
00:55:07,400 --> 00:55:10,719
Speaker 1: even that bad. But my mom got like, like what

1212
00:55:10,920 --> 00:55:12,719
Speaker 1: they were joking that my dad started chatting up some

1213
00:55:12,800 --> 00:55:14,799
Speaker 1: woman on the rooftop of this hotel when they went

1214
00:55:14,800 --> 00:55:16,520
Speaker 1: to the pool and she came up there and he's

1215
00:55:16,520 --> 00:55:18,279
Speaker 1: like throwing her kid like in the pool and like

1216
00:55:18,600 --> 00:55:20,760
Speaker 1: having fun with this kid, like kind of being grandpa.

1217
00:55:20,880 --> 00:55:22,680
Speaker 1: And my mom was like, who is this woman they're

1218
00:55:22,680 --> 00:55:24,279
Speaker 1: talking to her? And so they just started making a

1219
00:55:24,360 --> 00:55:26,200
Speaker 1: joke of like, oh, I gotta go see Diane later,

1220
00:55:26,360 --> 00:55:29,040
Speaker 1: like like my dad has a been a girlfriend and um,

1221
00:55:29,640 --> 00:55:31,880
Speaker 1: and my mom brought up something my dad said that

1222
00:55:32,000 --> 00:55:34,920
Speaker 1: was like maybe a little like embarrassing, And my dad goes,

1223
00:55:34,920 --> 00:55:36,080
Speaker 1: why do you have to bring that up? And I go,

1224
00:55:36,160 --> 00:55:37,600
Speaker 1: why did you have to bring up the Gary Schandling

1225
00:55:37,600 --> 00:55:40,200
Speaker 1: story in front of Kevin Ellen. I go, you both

1226
00:55:40,239 --> 00:55:43,360
Speaker 1: need to stop bringing up embarrassing moments that you go,

1227
00:55:43,560 --> 00:55:45,840
Speaker 1: why did you say that? No one wants to be embarrassing,

1228
00:55:45,920 --> 00:55:47,840
Speaker 1: So each of you, I never want to hear that

1229
00:55:47,880 --> 00:55:50,560
Speaker 1: story again. Oh I don't tell that Gary Shandlings. I've

1230
00:55:50,600 --> 00:55:52,840
Speaker 1: told that one time. And I go, Dad, I haven't memorized.

1231
00:55:52,840 --> 00:55:54,839
Speaker 1: You've told it at least three times in the past

1232
00:55:54,880 --> 00:55:56,960
Speaker 1: two years, I've heard it, and that's only when I'm

1233
00:55:56,960 --> 00:55:58,399
Speaker 1: around you guys, and you always do it in front

1234
00:55:58,400 --> 00:56:00,640
Speaker 1: of someone to make mom feel It's just like stop it,

1235
00:56:01,320 --> 00:56:05,000
Speaker 1: stop it, um or now, don't stop it. Be aware

1236
00:56:05,080 --> 00:56:06,880
Speaker 1: of it so that you can maybe get ahead of it.

1237
00:56:07,000 --> 00:56:10,400
Speaker 1: It's awareness is the key. Do I care? Number one

1238
00:56:10,440 --> 00:56:13,040
Speaker 1: Cable guy, we see through it. I can see through

1239
00:56:13,120 --> 00:56:15,600
Speaker 1: you a big deal and he should be proud. My

1240
00:56:15,640 --> 00:56:18,640
Speaker 1: mom should be bragging. What do we care? Why do

1241
00:56:18,760 --> 00:56:21,600
Speaker 1: I care? Why do you care? NIGGI let's find out.

1242
00:56:21,719 --> 00:56:25,400
Speaker 1: Dave Chappelle sings Radio Heads Creep with the Food Fighters

1243
00:56:25,440 --> 00:56:29,920
Speaker 1: that Madison Square Garden. Wow, I didn't see this. Can

1244
00:56:29,960 --> 00:56:48,720
Speaker 1: we here a little bit? Damn? I'm a he looks awesome.

1245
00:56:48,960 --> 00:56:54,160
Speaker 1: He's wearing sunglasses, a shirt, a green shirt. Oh Davis

1246
00:56:54,200 --> 00:56:58,000
Speaker 1: fucking jamming out behind him. I love this. First of all,

1247
00:56:58,040 --> 00:57:00,080
Speaker 1: I heard Dave Grohl talk about playing guitar let just

1248
00:57:00,120 --> 00:57:02,000
Speaker 1: while I'm so sorry you guys in the middle of

1249
00:57:02,000 --> 00:57:06,200
Speaker 1: eating breakfast. That's so road one second now sounds all right?

1250
00:57:07,880 --> 00:57:11,080
Speaker 1: I Noah as a guitar player, I will say something

1251
00:57:11,080 --> 00:57:15,040
Speaker 1: about Dave girl that opened up my world. Um, Dave

1252
00:57:15,080 --> 00:57:19,560
Speaker 1: Grohl obviously drummer for Nirvana always was musical, played all

1253
00:57:19,560 --> 00:57:23,000
Speaker 1: the instruments. But he said, I always think of guitar

1254
00:57:23,120 --> 00:57:25,480
Speaker 1: as a percussive instrument. As soon as I looked at

1255
00:57:25,520 --> 00:57:29,120
Speaker 1: it as like I'm just making like like like doing

1256
00:57:29,640 --> 00:57:33,080
Speaker 1: percussion on it and using it like a drum kit essentially,

1257
00:57:33,880 --> 00:57:36,000
Speaker 1: it suddenly made sense to me. And I was like,

1258
00:57:36,120 --> 00:57:39,520
Speaker 1: oh my god, that I can listen to look at

1259
00:57:39,560 --> 00:57:40,840
Speaker 1: the drug. I can just bang on the drum like

1260
00:57:40,960 --> 00:57:43,320
Speaker 1: I don't have to technically follow the perfect thing like

1261
00:57:43,760 --> 00:57:46,880
Speaker 1: I can make I can make it work for me. Um.

1262
00:57:46,960 --> 00:57:49,080
Speaker 1: Because that but that I never thought about, um the

1263
00:57:49,160 --> 00:57:52,360
Speaker 1: guitar being drums and drums make more sense to me

1264
00:57:52,480 --> 00:57:54,520
Speaker 1: than a guitar, and so that opened it up to me.

1265
00:57:54,560 --> 00:57:57,560
Speaker 1: And he was just definitely UM doing a drum solo

1266
00:57:57,560 --> 00:58:00,800
Speaker 1: on that guitar, and Dave is Dave good at everything, Dave,

1267
00:58:01,280 --> 00:58:06,400
Speaker 1: I mean, that was the best thing. Yeah, he looked

1268
00:58:06,440 --> 00:58:09,360
Speaker 1: cool as fuck. He didn't look like he was doing karaoke.

1269
00:58:09,560 --> 00:58:12,000
Speaker 1: I mean, he looked like he doesn't feel like. I

1270
00:58:12,040 --> 00:58:15,360
Speaker 1: feel like Dave has a way of getting I mean,

1271
00:58:15,400 --> 00:58:17,840
Speaker 1: I'm sure I don't know what the percentage of people

1272
00:58:17,880 --> 00:58:20,560
Speaker 1: that actually knew who he was in that audience probably

1273
00:58:20,840 --> 00:58:29,760
Speaker 1: what is at Merison Square Garden. You think seventy percent

1274
00:58:29,800 --> 00:58:34,640
Speaker 1: of them knew Dave Chappelle was. Are you sticking kidding me? Honestly?

1275
00:58:34,760 --> 00:58:37,520
Speaker 1: Are you drunk? Are you like? Are you you're popping

1276
00:58:37,600 --> 00:58:44,000
Speaker 1: out hard right now? I would say people knew who

1277
00:58:44,040 --> 00:58:47,400
Speaker 1: Dave Sabelle was. Dave Mibel. He's more famous than the

1278
00:58:47,400 --> 00:58:51,080
Speaker 1: Food Fighters. Unfortunately, you think so, you think I don't think.

1279
00:58:51,320 --> 00:58:55,840
Speaker 1: I think more people for certainly the word Dave Grohl.

1280
00:58:55,920 --> 00:58:58,040
Speaker 1: I will say he's more famous than Dave Girl. His

1281
00:58:58,160 --> 00:59:01,240
Speaker 1: name is more recognizable. Food Fighters possibly the same level.

1282
00:59:01,280 --> 00:59:04,800
Speaker 1: But DAVEA. Chabelle is everyone Ask your step mom who

1283
00:59:04,880 --> 00:59:09,560
Speaker 1: I bet you think doesn't know Innapolis. By the way,

1284
00:59:09,960 --> 00:59:12,720
Speaker 1: the other day, that was pretty funny. She goes in Minnapolis.

1285
00:59:13,080 --> 00:59:16,880
Speaker 1: It sounds kind of like St. Louis Lewis. But yes,

1286
00:59:17,040 --> 00:59:19,480
Speaker 1: I agree. I'm just saying that he crossed like him

1287
00:59:19,520 --> 00:59:22,640
Speaker 1: and John May are being best friends. It's all. It's

1288
00:59:22,800 --> 00:59:26,720
Speaker 1: it's another fan base that he hits with still being cool.

1289
00:59:27,000 --> 00:59:29,520
Speaker 1: Is My point is that like he still hits another

1290
00:59:29,600 --> 00:59:31,480
Speaker 1: fan base. He gets up at the Food Fighters, he's

1291
00:59:31,520 --> 00:59:34,560
Speaker 1: on stage, he's looking cool in glasses. It's just another

1292
00:59:34,640 --> 00:59:38,080
Speaker 1: way to be like, Hey, I'm Dave Chappelle, as we

1293
00:59:38,160 --> 00:59:40,320
Speaker 1: know from Bob Sagett, as we know from me telling

1294
00:59:40,360 --> 00:59:42,040
Speaker 1: you that when I was on Folon with him, he

1295
00:59:42,120 --> 00:59:45,000
Speaker 1: stayed on the zoom to watch me and like gave

1296
00:59:45,080 --> 00:59:46,960
Speaker 1: me a shout out. At the beginning it was say

1297
00:59:46,960 --> 00:59:48,320
Speaker 1: at a Nikki, and then at the end it was like,

1298
00:59:48,360 --> 00:59:50,280
Speaker 1: where's NICKI tell hers she did great. Like he's a

1299
00:59:50,360 --> 00:59:53,200
Speaker 1: fucking real dude, and like, I love Dave Chapelle. He

1300
00:59:53,240 --> 00:59:55,600
Speaker 1: can do anything. That's why I care and I'm and

1301
00:59:55,920 --> 00:59:57,760
Speaker 1: you know why I also care about that. A guy

1302
00:59:58,880 --> 01:00:02,439
Speaker 1: on a date to uh, I wish to a high

1303
01:00:02,760 --> 01:00:05,240
Speaker 1: um to Medicine Square Garden. This guy that I've been

1304
01:00:05,480 --> 01:00:07,800
Speaker 1: uh texting with, we met on Riot. We actually met

1305
01:00:07,840 --> 01:00:11,240
Speaker 1: in person a while ago and just passing. I think

1306
01:00:11,240 --> 01:00:12,520
Speaker 1: he was with someone at the time, so but I

1307
01:00:12,600 --> 01:00:13,880
Speaker 1: was like, that guy's cute and then they were like

1308
01:00:13,960 --> 01:00:16,919
Speaker 1: his a girlfriend. Years later we matchined, right, I always

1309
01:00:16,920 --> 01:00:19,400
Speaker 1: start texting. He writes to me, you know you were

1310
01:00:19,440 --> 01:00:21,800
Speaker 1: amazing on mar and you looked stunning to the And

1311
01:00:21,880 --> 01:00:24,480
Speaker 1: I invited him to Bend Gleeb's party and he goes um,

1312
01:00:25,160 --> 01:00:27,200
Speaker 1: I'm in New York for a few shows. I can't

1313
01:00:27,280 --> 01:00:29,920
Speaker 1: go when I get back, though, Uh, let's hang out

1314
01:00:30,360 --> 01:00:32,560
Speaker 1: and or get on a plane tomorrow morning and come

1315
01:00:32,600 --> 01:00:35,120
Speaker 1: see food Fighters and in MSG with me and I said,

1316
01:00:35,160 --> 01:00:37,080
Speaker 1: oh good, Christ wouldn't offer. He goes, I dare you?

1317
01:00:37,520 --> 01:00:38,880
Speaker 1: And then he wrote me the next day what time

1318
01:00:38,880 --> 01:00:41,480
Speaker 1: do you land? And sent me of like the Madson

1319
01:00:41,480 --> 01:00:43,240
Speaker 1: Square Garden like thing, and I said, God, I wish

1320
01:00:43,280 --> 01:00:44,800
Speaker 1: can't make it, but thank you for the offer. He said,

1321
01:00:44,960 --> 01:00:48,240
Speaker 1: I know I was being somewhat sarcastic. I'll sure, I'll

1322
01:00:48,320 --> 01:00:50,680
Speaker 1: sure will do my best to make you regret the

1323
01:00:50,760 --> 01:00:53,720
Speaker 1: lack of spontaneity. Though, if you would have offered to

1324
01:00:53,720 --> 01:00:58,320
Speaker 1: fly me out, I would have gone, he said, get

1325
01:00:58,400 --> 01:01:02,240
Speaker 1: on a plane and go. Listen. He would have, but

1326
01:01:02,360 --> 01:01:04,800
Speaker 1: I also was with my parents, and it would have

1327
01:01:04,840 --> 01:01:09,520
Speaker 1: been it's I think it's yeah, I think that's fine.

1328
01:01:09,520 --> 01:01:11,000
Speaker 1: Oh I thought it was so sexy. I was really

1329
01:01:11,160 --> 01:01:12,440
Speaker 1: really like, oh my god, I would have done it.

1330
01:01:12,560 --> 01:01:14,800
Speaker 1: He's so cute. And have you ever done anything like

1331
01:01:14,920 --> 01:01:19,680
Speaker 1: that up? Yes, to follow up when he got there, Yes, yeah,

1332
01:01:20,200 --> 01:01:25,520
Speaker 1: it's spontaneous things, but never like but let me just say,

1333
01:01:27,240 --> 01:01:30,280
Speaker 1: get me a plane ticket, like if a guy's gonna

1334
01:01:30,320 --> 01:01:32,040
Speaker 1: make that bolt of a mood, like let's go all

1335
01:01:32,080 --> 01:01:34,800
Speaker 1: the way and go. I will fly you here if

1336
01:01:34,840 --> 01:01:36,560
Speaker 1: you want to go with me. But at this the

1337
01:01:36,640 --> 01:01:38,480
Speaker 1: fact that he invited me was so cool, and I

1338
01:01:38,560 --> 01:01:40,200
Speaker 1: bet he was trying not to like show off his

1339
01:01:40,320 --> 01:01:42,360
Speaker 1: money and in respect the fact that I can buy

1340
01:01:42,360 --> 01:01:44,440
Speaker 1: my own plane ticket, like that's probably I didn't offer that,

1341
01:01:44,640 --> 01:01:46,320
Speaker 1: you know, and he probably didn't think you would take

1342
01:01:46,320 --> 01:01:50,760
Speaker 1: it serious. I really appreciate the offer, and I probably

1343
01:01:50,800 --> 01:01:52,280
Speaker 1: even if you offered to win me a plane ticket,

1344
01:01:52,320 --> 01:01:56,200
Speaker 1: I wouldn't have, but I probably would have come later

1345
01:01:56,280 --> 01:01:57,720
Speaker 1: on thinking about the fact that you offered to buy

1346
01:01:57,760 --> 01:01:59,320
Speaker 1: me a plane ticket. Flat Pam. Let's get to our

1347
01:01:59,440 --> 01:02:01,520
Speaker 1: regular day segment. I think we skipped it last week,

1348
01:02:01,520 --> 01:02:04,240
Speaker 1: but we're bringing it back this week. Top one bottom one.

1349
01:02:04,600 --> 01:02:06,520
Speaker 1: This is where we take a category and we eat

1350
01:02:06,760 --> 01:02:09,440
Speaker 1: each Noah, Andrew and I go around the horn and

1351
01:02:09,520 --> 01:02:13,560
Speaker 1: say our top one bottom one of this category. Today's category,

1352
01:02:13,880 --> 01:02:19,720
Speaker 1: as we decided before the show, um, is Noah, things

1353
01:02:19,800 --> 01:02:21,960
Speaker 1: that your dad has said to you? In honor of

1354
01:02:22,000 --> 01:02:24,600
Speaker 1: Father's Day, we're gonna say things that your dad has said.

1355
01:02:24,600 --> 01:02:28,080
Speaker 1: Do you top one. Bottom one. Uh, let's start with

1356
01:02:28,160 --> 01:02:30,320
Speaker 1: our bottoms, as we always always like to end on

1357
01:02:30,400 --> 01:02:32,640
Speaker 1: the top. Uh, Andrew, can you kick us off with

1358
01:02:32,760 --> 01:02:36,160
Speaker 1: the worst thing your dad has ever said? I mean,

1359
01:02:36,600 --> 01:02:39,200
Speaker 1: the list is long, and it's tattooed on my leg.

1360
01:02:40,480 --> 01:02:45,000
Speaker 1: Let's see. Um yeah, okay, So I would say it

1361
01:02:45,120 --> 01:02:47,040
Speaker 1: was this is kind of funny because my dad is

1362
01:02:47,120 --> 01:02:50,360
Speaker 1: here and I was sitting with him when you guys

1363
01:02:50,400 --> 01:02:52,920
Speaker 1: were texting. So I asked him, I go, what do

1364
01:02:52,960 --> 01:02:56,320
Speaker 1: you think your bottom? I asked for which I never

1365
01:02:56,360 --> 01:02:58,320
Speaker 1: would have done in our past. I'd be too afraid

1366
01:02:58,360 --> 01:03:02,240
Speaker 1: to do something I love it. And uh so he said, uh,

1367
01:03:02,680 --> 01:03:05,440
Speaker 1: we agree, that is bottom one. When I told him

1368
01:03:05,440 --> 01:03:08,040
Speaker 1: I want to be a comedic writer before I even

1369
01:03:08,080 --> 01:03:10,080
Speaker 1: wanted to do stand up, he looked at me and

1370
01:03:10,160 --> 01:03:13,880
Speaker 1: he goes, hey, Andrew, I also want to Oh yeah,

1371
01:03:13,920 --> 01:03:15,280
Speaker 1: you want to be a comedic writer. I want to

1372
01:03:15,280 --> 01:03:20,320
Speaker 1: play third base for the Yankees, meaning it's impossible, you

1373
01:03:20,440 --> 01:03:23,880
Speaker 1: can't do it. I want this crazy dream. Get over it,

1374
01:03:24,240 --> 01:03:28,040
Speaker 1: get a career, don't be a fucking idiot. Essentially, don't

1375
01:03:28,040 --> 01:03:31,640
Speaker 1: be a poppy. Yeah, don't be a poppy. And I

1376
01:03:31,680 --> 01:03:33,320
Speaker 1: can't wait till Poppy is old enough to know that

1377
01:03:33,400 --> 01:03:36,520
Speaker 1: we've used her name to mean dumb, because she'll get it.

1378
01:03:36,560 --> 01:03:38,440
Speaker 1: She'll think it's really funny because she's gonna grow up

1379
01:03:38,440 --> 01:03:40,400
Speaker 1: and she's not gonna be a dumb baby anywhere. Um,

1380
01:03:41,080 --> 01:03:43,040
Speaker 1: or she might be dumb. Who knows, probably might be dumb,

1381
01:03:43,080 --> 01:03:44,600
Speaker 1: and I'll still love her and she's still a great

1382
01:03:44,720 --> 01:03:46,800
Speaker 1: human that has as much value as a smart human.

1383
01:03:46,840 --> 01:03:48,240
Speaker 1: By the way, if you're dumb out there and you're like,

1384
01:03:49,200 --> 01:03:51,520
Speaker 1: I'm not anti dumb because people are, there is a

1385
01:03:52,480 --> 01:03:54,520
Speaker 1: a racism, not racist, but there is an is m

1386
01:03:55,240 --> 01:03:59,760
Speaker 1: for um. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I don't forget what it's called.

1387
01:03:59,800 --> 01:04:03,320
Speaker 1: But because I'm I'm a poppy, but um, people talk

1388
01:04:03,400 --> 01:04:05,760
Speaker 1: down like, oh they're dumb, and it's like, yeah, you

1389
01:04:05,800 --> 01:04:07,320
Speaker 1: know what they were. They can choose to have the

1390
01:04:07,360 --> 01:04:09,400
Speaker 1: brain that doesn't have as much information and then and

1391
01:04:09,440 --> 01:04:11,280
Speaker 1: they didn't choose to go to the schools that they

1392
01:04:11,320 --> 01:04:14,720
Speaker 1: went to. It's like, people, you shouldn't discriminate because someone's dumb.

1393
01:04:14,840 --> 01:04:17,600
Speaker 1: And I truly I think dumb people are awesome and

1394
01:04:17,680 --> 01:04:20,640
Speaker 1: I think too dumb to do this, and some people

1395
01:04:20,640 --> 01:04:22,720
Speaker 1: are way more fun, Like I said, they take more chances,

1396
01:04:22,800 --> 01:04:25,120
Speaker 1: they shoot their shot, and symptimes. Those shots work. I'll

1397
01:04:25,120 --> 01:04:28,520
Speaker 1: see you in de Moines, Steve. Um, We'll remember Joe

1398
01:04:28,600 --> 01:04:31,360
Speaker 1: Bucks golf caddy was talked about in golf you either

1399
01:04:31,400 --> 01:04:34,760
Speaker 1: want to be insanely dumb or insanely smart. Yeah. He

1400
01:04:34,800 --> 01:04:39,959
Speaker 1: said that the best golfers are either like so, because

1401
01:04:40,000 --> 01:04:42,200
Speaker 1: you have to be so locked in and meditative that

1402
01:04:42,360 --> 01:04:44,280
Speaker 1: there can be nothing else going on your brain when

1403
01:04:44,320 --> 01:04:46,880
Speaker 1: you are out there. So some people really have nothing

1404
01:04:46,920 --> 01:04:48,280
Speaker 1: in their brain and that's why they're so good, and

1405
01:04:48,360 --> 01:04:50,000
Speaker 1: other people have to meditate and get to a place

1406
01:04:50,040 --> 01:04:51,840
Speaker 1: where they have nothing in their brains. So that was

1407
01:04:51,920 --> 01:04:54,440
Speaker 1: very interesting. Okay, that is the worst. That is a

1408
01:04:54,520 --> 01:04:58,240
Speaker 1: bad thing. Because your dad was being your dad's funny

1409
01:04:58,360 --> 01:05:02,439
Speaker 1: your dad to be a comedy writer. Um that was yeah,

1410
01:05:03,080 --> 01:05:06,320
Speaker 1: and um uh, but you had a good laugh about

1411
01:05:06,320 --> 01:05:07,920
Speaker 1: it this morning. Did he reflect on it and say

1412
01:05:07,920 --> 01:05:09,280
Speaker 1: I'm sorry I said that to you or did he

1413
01:05:09,360 --> 01:05:11,720
Speaker 1: just laugh and go that was that was right? No? No,

1414
01:05:11,920 --> 01:05:14,600
Speaker 1: he yeah, he's definitely reflected. I mean I would get

1415
01:05:14,640 --> 01:05:17,160
Speaker 1: back to the top dad. Actually, I wrote on f

1416
01:05:17,400 --> 01:05:20,520
Speaker 1: Boy Island, so suck my dick, and he goes, I

1417
01:05:20,560 --> 01:05:22,480
Speaker 1: can't wait to seeing the credits. I go, well, dad,

1418
01:05:22,680 --> 01:05:25,320
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna exactly be in the credits because I

1419
01:05:25,520 --> 01:05:31,520
Speaker 1: was hired corporation didn't really believe in me. But yeah,

1420
01:05:31,640 --> 01:05:33,280
Speaker 1: so they didn't know about you until I brought you

1421
01:05:33,320 --> 01:05:35,880
Speaker 1: to the Island as my podcast co host that I

1422
01:05:36,080 --> 01:05:37,640
Speaker 1: worked out in my deal and then I snuck the

1423
01:05:37,680 --> 01:05:40,880
Speaker 1: into set and he were a vital component of that show.

1424
01:05:40,960 --> 01:05:42,080
Speaker 1: By the way, I can't wait for you guys to

1425
01:05:42,120 --> 01:05:46,080
Speaker 1: see it. F Boy Island coming soon. Um let's bottom up, Noah,

1426
01:05:47,120 --> 01:05:50,040
Speaker 1: bottom thing your dad said to you, all right, this

1427
01:05:50,280 --> 01:05:54,880
Speaker 1: was I'm sorry triggering. Yeah, alright, So I guess the

1428
01:05:54,960 --> 01:05:58,400
Speaker 1: thing that I can think of is like any time

1429
01:05:58,560 --> 01:06:01,280
Speaker 1: my dad would share stories from his childhood growing up

1430
01:06:01,320 --> 01:06:05,920
Speaker 1: in communism, and it made me realize as an adult

1431
01:06:05,960 --> 01:06:08,720
Speaker 1: because you know, like who we are as adults stems

1432
01:06:08,760 --> 01:06:11,919
Speaker 1: from our childhood. Like the reason why my dad has

1433
01:06:12,000 --> 01:06:16,160
Speaker 1: absolutely no emotional intelligence is because he had to hide

1434
01:06:16,200 --> 01:06:19,400
Speaker 1: a lot of his feelings just from his circumstances growing up.

1435
01:06:20,360 --> 01:06:25,720
Speaker 1: So communism makes your made your dad a poppy emotionally

1436
01:06:25,800 --> 01:06:28,800
Speaker 1: an emotion an emotional poppy. Is there an example of

1437
01:06:28,880 --> 01:06:31,800
Speaker 1: a kind of emotional lack of emotional intelligence that stands

1438
01:06:31,800 --> 01:06:34,280
Speaker 1: out to you that wouldn't UM make you sad to

1439
01:06:34,480 --> 01:06:37,520
Speaker 1: recount or make us all go oh poor Noah, because

1440
01:06:37,560 --> 01:06:39,000
Speaker 1: we all have those Like I didn't want to I

1441
01:06:39,040 --> 01:06:41,440
Speaker 1: didn't want to make you guys like say things that

1442
01:06:41,880 --> 01:06:43,720
Speaker 1: we've all had our dad say hurtful things that we

1443
01:06:43,840 --> 01:06:45,720
Speaker 1: might not want to share. But this is more of

1444
01:06:45,800 --> 01:06:47,520
Speaker 1: like a fun like what a dumb thing for him

1445
01:06:47,560 --> 01:06:49,800
Speaker 1: to say. It's okay if you say now, I guess

1446
01:06:49,840 --> 01:06:52,400
Speaker 1: like any time UM we would talk about my career

1447
01:06:52,480 --> 01:06:54,520
Speaker 1: and he would tell me like, oh, you know, just

1448
01:06:54,640 --> 01:06:58,640
Speaker 1: don't shake anything up, Just don't say anything like right

1449
01:06:59,200 --> 01:07:02,720
Speaker 1: for more than you don't, don't demand anything else, which Noah,

1450
01:07:02,800 --> 01:07:07,640
Speaker 1: by the way, as such, Ah, we should we should

1451
01:07:07,640 --> 01:07:11,080
Speaker 1: talk about it later, like in working with you on

1452
01:07:11,240 --> 01:07:14,560
Speaker 1: building this podcast and in the in the interim when

1453
01:07:14,600 --> 01:07:16,440
Speaker 1: we didn't know what we were going to do next together.

1454
01:07:16,640 --> 01:07:19,320
Speaker 1: And no Ah as someone I've learned a lot from

1455
01:07:19,960 --> 01:07:23,680
Speaker 1: Uh who's done the work to value herself as much

1456
01:07:23,760 --> 01:07:27,080
Speaker 1: as she is good, like knows her value now and

1457
01:07:27,320 --> 01:07:30,040
Speaker 1: like asked for what she deserves and gets what she

1458
01:07:30,120 --> 01:07:33,160
Speaker 1: fucking deserves. And it's like if you if you are

1459
01:07:33,200 --> 01:07:37,200
Speaker 1: someone who works in a corporate environment and you're thinking

1460
01:07:37,280 --> 01:07:39,200
Speaker 1: of how to like ask for what you want, you

1461
01:07:39,240 --> 01:07:43,520
Speaker 1: feel like you deserve more. Um shoot, Noah injection a

1462
01:07:43,640 --> 01:07:46,000
Speaker 1: d M because she might have some good pieces of

1463
01:07:46,080 --> 01:07:49,000
Speaker 1: advice that helped her as someone who was raised to

1464
01:07:49,080 --> 01:07:52,600
Speaker 1: not think that way about herself, to overcome those in

1465
01:07:52,680 --> 01:07:55,360
Speaker 1: a you know, Noah, she's so nice, you guys, she

1466
01:07:55,520 --> 01:07:58,080
Speaker 1: talks like this and she's like very helpful and like

1467
01:07:58,240 --> 01:08:07,160
Speaker 1: once to be happy that bitch leans in comes from

1468
01:08:07,640 --> 01:08:10,240
Speaker 1: like you. You leaned in, girl, and I've learned a lot,

1469
01:08:10,400 --> 01:08:13,560
Speaker 1: Like I definitely don't know that I would be able

1470
01:08:13,600 --> 01:08:16,000
Speaker 1: to do the same kind of stuff like that you've

1471
01:08:16,080 --> 01:08:18,120
Speaker 1: done to get what you deserve and not ask for

1472
01:08:18,240 --> 01:08:21,400
Speaker 1: more than you deserve, nothing like that, not take advantage,

1473
01:08:21,760 --> 01:08:26,760
Speaker 1: but just feel compensated for what you're doing. And guess what,

1474
01:08:26,880 --> 01:08:29,280
Speaker 1: when you get comp when you're probably compensated for what

1475
01:08:29,400 --> 01:08:33,320
Speaker 1: you do, works so much harder and better and you

1476
01:08:33,560 --> 01:08:36,200
Speaker 1: actually have more, so much feels so good. That's why

1477
01:08:36,240 --> 01:08:39,719
Speaker 1: I'm always like, if you can afford to pay movers

1478
01:08:39,920 --> 01:08:42,800
Speaker 1: tip movers a hundred bucks that are moving some couch

1479
01:08:42,880 --> 01:08:45,040
Speaker 1: and if you could afford the ex hundred bucks, fucking

1480
01:08:45,120 --> 01:08:47,840
Speaker 1: do it. They're not always My mom goes well, the

1481
01:08:47,920 --> 01:08:51,519
Speaker 1: tips included. I go, this society doesn't pay people enough,

1482
01:08:51,880 --> 01:08:56,600
Speaker 1: and the minimum wage has not increased with inflation. We

1483
01:08:56,760 --> 01:08:58,439
Speaker 1: need to step it up. And you know, well the

1484
01:08:58,479 --> 01:09:00,720
Speaker 1: government needs to figure it out. They're not figuring it out.

1485
01:09:00,800 --> 01:09:02,760
Speaker 1: So if you have enough money, you gotta step it up,

1486
01:09:02,760 --> 01:09:05,360
Speaker 1: and you've gotta people need to be compensated more. I don't.

1487
01:09:05,680 --> 01:09:08,240
Speaker 1: When I leave tips, I leave a percent. Sometimes my

1488
01:09:08,280 --> 01:09:11,000
Speaker 1: parents go, nikky, that's too much. I go, it's because

1489
01:09:11,080 --> 01:09:13,959
Speaker 1: it's not because they did a fantastic topics. Because they're underpaid.

1490
01:09:14,400 --> 01:09:16,679
Speaker 1: They are underpaid for what they do. Garbagement are underpaid.

1491
01:09:16,840 --> 01:09:19,280
Speaker 1: I should not be paid for how much I get paid.

1492
01:09:19,320 --> 01:09:23,240
Speaker 1: It's not right. But because I do, I gotta give

1493
01:09:23,280 --> 01:09:25,840
Speaker 1: more money to other people, because I'm a fucking hero.

1494
01:09:26,600 --> 01:09:30,000
Speaker 1: My bottom thing that my dad um has said to me,

1495
01:09:30,080 --> 01:09:35,120
Speaker 1: hold on, I actually have it recorded one How could

1496
01:09:35,240 --> 01:09:42,200
Speaker 1: you do this? As long as called babe? It's by

1497
01:09:42,280 --> 01:09:46,439
Speaker 1: sugar Lands and it's Taylor Swift. We ain't it in

1498
01:09:46,680 --> 01:09:51,479
Speaker 1: through this long? Baby, baby, baby babe. This is the

1499
01:09:51,600 --> 01:09:56,080
Speaker 1: last time I love call you, babe. Thank God I

1500
01:09:56,200 --> 01:09:57,920
Speaker 1: cued that up. I was walking with my mom this morning.

1501
01:09:58,000 --> 01:09:59,760
Speaker 1: I go, people make fun of me because one day

1502
01:09:59,800 --> 01:10:03,519
Speaker 1: on the podcast, I answer the phone and Dad goes, hey, babe,

1503
01:10:03,640 --> 01:10:05,519
Speaker 1: and I go, I gotta say, it's babe. No. The

1504
01:10:05,560 --> 01:10:07,519
Speaker 1: worst thing my dad ever said besides babe, which I

1505
01:10:07,600 --> 01:10:11,200
Speaker 1: didn't think was bad, was I was, um, I've told

1506
01:10:11,240 --> 01:10:12,880
Speaker 1: the story a bunch, but I was like, you know,

1507
01:10:13,240 --> 01:10:15,760
Speaker 1: probably thirty twelve or thirteen, and I was in a

1508
01:10:15,800 --> 01:10:19,120
Speaker 1: swimsuit from swim practice and I was eating tomato soup,

1509
01:10:20,120 --> 01:10:22,360
Speaker 1: seeking some kind of soup. Such a weird thing to

1510
01:10:22,400 --> 01:10:24,960
Speaker 1: eat coming out of a pool soup because you I

1511
01:10:26,479 --> 01:10:28,400
Speaker 1: and soup. You know, I was wearing this was it

1512
01:10:28,479 --> 01:10:29,880
Speaker 1: was dry by the time. We spent all day at

1513
01:10:29,880 --> 01:10:31,320
Speaker 1: the pool. And then I'm home and I'm still in

1514
01:10:31,560 --> 01:10:34,000
Speaker 1: dry some soup and I'm eating a dinner and it's

1515
01:10:34,400 --> 01:10:38,439
Speaker 1: and my dad goes, Nick, it looks like it looks

1516
01:10:38,479 --> 01:10:42,439
Speaker 1: like you're getting some boobs there, and I just dropped

1517
01:10:42,479 --> 01:10:46,040
Speaker 1: my spoon and I was like, and I cried and

1518
01:10:46,280 --> 01:10:48,479
Speaker 1: ran into my and my mom goes, why would you

1519
01:10:48,680 --> 01:10:51,360
Speaker 1: say anything like that to her? And I go, oh

1520
01:10:51,479 --> 01:10:53,439
Speaker 1: my god, and he goes, oh my god, I don't

1521
01:10:53,439 --> 01:10:55,280
Speaker 1: know what I said. And she goes, you don't say

1522
01:10:55,360 --> 01:10:57,720
Speaker 1: that to her, and I ran in my bedroom. I

1523
01:10:57,800 --> 01:10:59,240
Speaker 1: leaned up against the door because I didn't have a

1524
01:10:59,320 --> 01:11:01,559
Speaker 1: lock on my door, and I go, dude, welcome ahead.

1525
01:11:01,920 --> 01:11:03,479
Speaker 1: I never want to talk about this I had, and

1526
01:11:03,520 --> 01:11:05,680
Speaker 1: he's like, nicky, I'm so sorry. I didn't. I didn't know.

1527
01:11:05,800 --> 01:11:08,519
Speaker 1: I I'm so sorry, and I'm like, I had never

1528
01:11:09,000 --> 01:11:10,760
Speaker 1: talking about this. And I'm in my room and I'm

1529
01:11:10,760 --> 01:11:12,640
Speaker 1: like fucking hungry. This sucks that I have to like

1530
01:11:12,760 --> 01:11:14,519
Speaker 1: stay in here, and I'm like, what am I gonna do?

1531
01:11:14,560 --> 01:11:15,920
Speaker 1: I have to come out and see my dad again,

1532
01:11:16,280 --> 01:11:19,280
Speaker 1: and I eventually left. We never talked about it again

1533
01:11:19,360 --> 01:11:21,080
Speaker 1: ever until I was an adult, and I was remember

1534
01:11:21,080 --> 01:11:22,880
Speaker 1: when you told me I was getting some boobs, and

1535
01:11:22,960 --> 01:11:23,960
Speaker 1: he was like, I was just trying to make you

1536
01:11:24,000 --> 01:11:25,519
Speaker 1: feel good about your you know, when you were like

1537
01:11:25,560 --> 01:11:28,360
Speaker 1: excited about getting pubes. I was not excited about becoming

1538
01:11:28,360 --> 01:11:30,439
Speaker 1: a woman, and having my dad pointed out was just

1539
01:11:30,560 --> 01:11:32,960
Speaker 1: horrified to me. But the other day, you guys, I'm

1540
01:11:33,000 --> 01:11:36,560
Speaker 1: not joking you. It wasn't as bad as this, but

1541
01:11:36,720 --> 01:11:38,600
Speaker 1: it was. I was at Bill mar I go in

1542
01:11:38,720 --> 01:11:41,160
Speaker 1: the next dressing room to get dressed because I got

1543
01:11:41,240 --> 01:11:42,920
Speaker 1: my makeup done in normal clothes. My parents are in

1544
01:11:42,920 --> 01:11:46,320
Speaker 1: the dressing room, my publicists there, Bill Dixon is there,

1545
01:11:46,360 --> 01:11:49,840
Speaker 1: my friend, and um, I walk in after getting dressed

1546
01:11:49,880 --> 01:11:51,840
Speaker 1: and I walk in, I'm like Tata and you know,

1547
01:11:51,880 --> 01:11:55,719
Speaker 1: I look all gussied up, and my dad goes, god damn,

1548
01:11:56,200 --> 01:11:58,560
Speaker 1: like he says that. He goes. It was literally it

1549
01:11:58,600 --> 01:12:01,200
Speaker 1: wasn't even God damn. It was like hubbub. It literally

1550
01:12:01,320 --> 01:12:03,600
Speaker 1: was I'm not joking you. And I go, Dad, you

1551
01:12:03,720 --> 01:12:06,280
Speaker 1: don't say that to your daughter. And everyone was like, yeah,

1552
01:12:06,360 --> 01:12:08,960
Speaker 1: you don't. Like everyone agreed. Even my publicist was like, yeah,

1553
01:12:09,000 --> 01:12:11,439
Speaker 1: that was a little weird. I go. He goes, you

1554
01:12:11,560 --> 01:12:14,040
Speaker 1: just look I mean like you look like he would

1555
01:12:14,040 --> 01:12:16,360
Speaker 1: be like, you look sucky, and I'm like, but that's me,

1556
01:12:16,560 --> 01:12:22,280
Speaker 1: don't I go. Don't see like So that's probably the

1557
01:12:22,320 --> 01:12:24,360
Speaker 1: worst thing. Uh, Andrew, what's the best thing your dad's

1558
01:12:24,360 --> 01:12:26,120
Speaker 1: ever said? Let's do the top one. Best thing your

1559
01:12:26,200 --> 01:12:28,599
Speaker 1: dad's ever said, The top one my dad has ever said.

1560
01:12:28,640 --> 01:12:31,160
Speaker 1: He goes, man, I could see your thick cock through

1561
01:12:31,200 --> 01:12:33,560
Speaker 1: to his umbros and I was like, thanks dad. No,

1562
01:12:34,880 --> 01:12:39,519
Speaker 1: he said, your dick's really coming in there. Yeah, with

1563
01:12:39,600 --> 01:12:43,320
Speaker 1: your dick. I just remember the soup splashing because I

1564
01:12:43,400 --> 01:12:46,280
Speaker 1: threw the spoon and it's splashed in like this whole thing.

1565
01:12:46,320 --> 01:12:47,960
Speaker 1: And it was probably period blood because I was really

1566
01:12:47,960 --> 01:12:52,680
Speaker 1: good at my period too. Ever said best thing is

1567
01:12:53,280 --> 01:12:55,679
Speaker 1: it came full circle? Or not full circle? Have circle?

1568
01:12:55,760 --> 01:12:58,439
Speaker 1: I don't know whatever. When I did my one man show,

1569
01:12:58,520 --> 01:13:02,920
Speaker 1: what you watch that? You're so good? Dude? I again,

1570
01:13:03,560 --> 01:13:06,760
Speaker 1: did you record that? I think it is recorded. There's

1571
01:13:06,800 --> 01:13:09,519
Speaker 1: gotta you gotta put you gotta put that out. I'm serious,

1572
01:13:09,600 --> 01:13:11,840
Speaker 1: I gotta find it. But so my dad at the end,

1573
01:13:11,960 --> 01:13:15,040
Speaker 1: I you know, I ended it, and I uh, I asked,

1574
01:13:15,120 --> 01:13:16,680
Speaker 1: you know, because I talked about being in debt and

1575
01:13:16,720 --> 01:13:20,000
Speaker 1: I talked about my anxieties all that. I go, hey, Dad,

1576
01:13:20,040 --> 01:13:22,599
Speaker 1: would you who would invest? And I planned it out

1577
01:13:22,640 --> 01:13:25,439
Speaker 1: with my dad before and and I go, dad, would

1578
01:13:25,479 --> 01:13:28,840
Speaker 1: you invest in me? And he goes, Andrew, I'm all in,

1579
01:13:29,320 --> 01:13:33,200
Speaker 1: which it's like it's cheesy, but it was really to

1580
01:13:33,479 --> 01:13:36,280
Speaker 1: make me cry. That's so sweet and it's so proud

1581
01:13:36,360 --> 01:13:38,519
Speaker 1: of you. Yeah, to go from third base of the

1582
01:13:38,640 --> 01:13:41,599
Speaker 1: Yankees to I'm all in. Uh, you know, to come

1583
01:13:41,600 --> 01:13:43,720
Speaker 1: from a family where your dad doesn't have money to

1584
01:13:43,880 --> 01:13:46,640
Speaker 1: just buy a sprinter van because he doesn't want to

1585
01:13:46,680 --> 01:13:48,639
Speaker 1: take a flight like and and to have a brother

1586
01:13:48,720 --> 01:13:53,160
Speaker 1: who was has more money than you'll ever even come

1587
01:13:53,320 --> 01:13:56,560
Speaker 1: like than Kevin Hart because of what the industry he

1588
01:13:56,640 --> 01:13:58,320
Speaker 1: works in, where that's that kind of money to be

1589
01:13:58,439 --> 01:14:02,479
Speaker 1: made and to have been a dogwalker, worked in grilled cheese.

1590
01:14:02,560 --> 01:14:05,920
Speaker 1: Wanted to like you. Finally at the age of like

1591
01:14:06,160 --> 01:14:08,800
Speaker 1: I would say, by thirty nine, you were doing stuff

1592
01:14:08,800 --> 01:14:11,120
Speaker 1: that you were always doing stuff that was like people,

1593
01:14:11,280 --> 01:14:13,680
Speaker 1: you were well respected in comedy, didn't really have much

1594
01:14:13,720 --> 01:14:15,760
Speaker 1: to show for that to your family unless you're on TV.

1595
01:14:15,840 --> 01:14:17,840
Speaker 1: Your family doesn't get how like the open mic scene

1596
01:14:17,960 --> 01:14:21,960
Speaker 1: views you. But now like you have made it. I

1597
01:14:22,000 --> 01:14:25,200
Speaker 1: mean they must be like freaking out, like yeah, it's cool, man,

1598
01:14:25,520 --> 01:14:29,120
Speaker 1: it's really cool, and I I just yeah, I mean

1599
01:14:29,880 --> 01:14:32,680
Speaker 1: that has no clear cut. When your dad is a

1600
01:14:32,840 --> 01:14:36,680
Speaker 1: Jewish doctor, the last thing he wants to hear is like, oh,

1601
01:14:37,080 --> 01:14:40,200
Speaker 1: you want to make it as a comedian, as an

1602
01:14:40,439 --> 01:14:43,800
Speaker 1: you know, as an artist. He's like, no, and get

1603
01:14:43,840 --> 01:14:48,479
Speaker 1: a career. I wanted to be a comedian, and my

1604
01:14:48,600 --> 01:14:52,280
Speaker 1: mom was like, just be an English teacher, because I

1605
01:14:52,320 --> 01:14:55,880
Speaker 1: was really good at English, always was excelled in those

1606
01:14:55,960 --> 01:14:59,360
Speaker 1: classes very easily. And um, she was like, I just

1607
01:14:59,479 --> 01:15:01,840
Speaker 1: you should be college professor. And that was like her

1608
01:15:01,960 --> 01:15:04,200
Speaker 1: safe dream for me because it was achievable. It was

1609
01:15:04,240 --> 01:15:07,519
Speaker 1: like clear cut, there's a She probably googled the salary

1610
01:15:07,640 --> 01:15:09,760
Speaker 1: and was like, that's good for my daughter. And I

1611
01:15:09,880 --> 01:15:12,120
Speaker 1: just was always like, that's why would you want me

1612
01:15:12,160 --> 01:15:13,600
Speaker 1: to do something that I don't even want to do

1613
01:15:13,800 --> 01:15:16,240
Speaker 1: just because it's safe. But then, you know, I looked

1614
01:15:16,240 --> 01:15:18,080
Speaker 1: out having parents that, But that's what I did for

1615
01:15:18,400 --> 01:15:21,400
Speaker 1: fifteen years after college. I just did things that were

1616
01:15:21,439 --> 01:15:27,640
Speaker 1: safe because it was through but that wasn't that was

1617
01:15:27,760 --> 01:15:31,160
Speaker 1: such a hot dot com but that was real, I know.

1618
01:15:31,400 --> 01:15:33,360
Speaker 1: But it was like on top of like doing a

1619
01:15:33,479 --> 01:15:36,040
Speaker 1: safe and my dogs weren't safe when you were walking them,

1620
01:15:36,080 --> 01:15:41,040
Speaker 1: but maybe you were safe. Um, you're right and those

1621
01:15:41,120 --> 01:15:46,599
Speaker 1: things are not safe. Try to COMI but yes, yes, yes, yes, yes,

1622
01:15:46,680 --> 01:15:49,000
Speaker 1: yes no, what's the top one thing your dad said

1623
01:15:49,040 --> 01:15:52,840
Speaker 1: to you? Alright? So for a father who was an

1624
01:15:52,880 --> 01:15:56,360
Speaker 1: emotional poppy, Um, he tells this story of when I

1625
01:15:56,479 --> 01:15:58,560
Speaker 1: was two years old and I was in a like

1626
01:15:58,680 --> 01:16:02,200
Speaker 1: a daycare, fell on my on my finger. So he

1627
01:16:02,280 --> 01:16:04,800
Speaker 1: tells a story of holding me while the doctor is

1628
01:16:04,840 --> 01:16:08,360
Speaker 1: sowing my finger back together, and he's like, so just

1629
01:16:08,479 --> 01:16:10,840
Speaker 1: the way he tells it, how I was crying in

1630
01:16:11,000 --> 01:16:13,280
Speaker 1: his arms and he almost fainted while he was holding me.

1631
01:16:13,880 --> 01:16:16,599
Speaker 1: Just like the most emotion that I will ever get

1632
01:16:16,640 --> 01:16:18,400
Speaker 1: out of my father. And it's the sweetest thing. And

1633
01:16:18,479 --> 01:16:22,160
Speaker 1: I love it. I love that. That's so sweet. What

1634
01:16:22,280 --> 01:16:25,360
Speaker 1: a sweet category thing we picked. I'm like getting emotional,

1635
01:16:26,360 --> 01:16:28,880
Speaker 1: Like hearing your dad tell about this harrowing time where

1636
01:16:28,920 --> 01:16:32,120
Speaker 1: he was so scared finally lets him open up emotionally

1637
01:16:32,200 --> 01:16:33,800
Speaker 1: enough to show how much he loves you. But it

1638
01:16:33,880 --> 01:16:36,680
Speaker 1: has to be through almost thinking he's like losing you

1639
01:16:36,760 --> 01:16:39,040
Speaker 1: in a way. That's the hardest part about these things,

1640
01:16:39,200 --> 01:16:40,800
Speaker 1: is like, why do we have to wait till my

1641
01:16:40,880 --> 01:16:46,479
Speaker 1: finger explodes? Can't you just tell me to not feel

1642
01:16:46,960 --> 01:16:52,400
Speaker 1: especially if they're raised. Yeah, but at least it can

1643
01:16:52,439 --> 01:16:55,479
Speaker 1: come out then That's that's the beauty, is that sometimes

1644
01:16:55,520 --> 01:16:58,880
Speaker 1: emotions you can't push them down and they come out

1645
01:16:59,080 --> 01:17:02,160
Speaker 1: finally and and I yeah, I just want to add

1646
01:17:02,240 --> 01:17:05,479
Speaker 1: I only heard this story like maybe three years ago

1647
01:17:06,640 --> 01:17:09,200
Speaker 1: from his pursuit story two nights ago, that I was

1648
01:17:09,320 --> 01:17:12,400
Speaker 1: born eight months a month early. I didn't had no

1649
01:17:12,479 --> 01:17:16,040
Speaker 1: idea it was a premiun last night or two nights

1650
01:17:16,040 --> 01:17:18,679
Speaker 1: ago I had. I didn't have a heartbeat. They checked

1651
01:17:18,720 --> 01:17:22,439
Speaker 1: my mom's my heartbeat. I was at thirty heartbeats or

1652
01:17:22,520 --> 01:17:25,479
Speaker 1: thirty whatever beats percause a minute, I guess, or whatever

1653
01:17:25,560 --> 01:17:27,680
Speaker 1: it is. They thought I was dying in there. The

1654
01:17:27,800 --> 01:17:29,800
Speaker 1: cord was around my neck, so they had emergency c

1655
01:17:29,920 --> 01:17:33,439
Speaker 1: section when I was eight months. Jesus and my dad

1656
01:17:33,520 --> 01:17:35,519
Speaker 1: just told me this story. I mean, it's just I

1657
01:17:35,520 --> 01:17:37,120
Speaker 1: don't know. I was eight pounds eight ounces, so I

1658
01:17:37,200 --> 01:17:41,799
Speaker 1: was a really fast brady cardia, which is low pulse

1659
01:17:42,320 --> 01:17:44,519
Speaker 1: heartbeat like whenever I get That's why I ended up

1660
01:17:44,560 --> 01:17:47,120
Speaker 1: actually going to the hospital for an rexy. Is like

1661
01:17:47,320 --> 01:17:49,960
Speaker 1: I was dying, but my heartweight was so low that

1662
01:17:50,040 --> 01:17:52,040
Speaker 1: they were like if you leave the hospital. I was

1663
01:17:52,080 --> 01:17:54,360
Speaker 1: there for check up when I was like, you know,

1664
01:17:54,520 --> 01:17:56,240
Speaker 1: everyone was in denial about me being sick, but I

1665
01:17:56,320 --> 01:17:58,680
Speaker 1: was just there for physical to go to college. And

1666
01:17:58,800 --> 01:18:01,680
Speaker 1: they took my heart like they you know, they did

1667
01:18:01,760 --> 01:18:04,960
Speaker 1: the regular like blood pressure, and they were like, unfortunately,

1668
01:18:05,080 --> 01:18:07,120
Speaker 1: like it's so low, like we can't like you you're

1669
01:18:07,120 --> 01:18:09,280
Speaker 1: gonna die, and like we can't let you go. But

1670
01:18:09,439 --> 01:18:11,280
Speaker 1: the thing is, I came to find out later on

1671
01:18:11,360 --> 01:18:14,200
Speaker 1: as I got healthy, like my heart rate is always

1672
01:18:14,920 --> 01:18:17,320
Speaker 1: so low. They everyone always thinks I'm a marathon runner,

1673
01:18:17,680 --> 01:18:19,920
Speaker 1: and I have. I've had a lot of e kg s,

1674
01:18:20,000 --> 01:18:24,559
Speaker 1: but my resting pulse rate is always about forty nine,

1675
01:18:25,080 --> 01:18:27,759
Speaker 1: which is really low. And when I'm actually really relaxed,

1676
01:18:27,920 --> 01:18:32,360
Speaker 1: it's like can get down to like forty or high thirties, which, um,

1677
01:18:32,640 --> 01:18:34,640
Speaker 1: and if you're dumb like Poppy, you probably gonna get

1678
01:18:35,479 --> 01:18:38,200
Speaker 1: b Yeah. Oh man, I keep getting slower, but I

1679
01:18:38,400 --> 01:18:41,560
Speaker 1: have that thirties. Your sister gonna kill us for this. No,

1680
01:18:41,720 --> 01:18:43,439
Speaker 1: I think they're gonna like it. And because I think

1681
01:18:43,680 --> 01:18:45,759
Speaker 1: and I think we should keep using it because Poppy

1682
01:18:45,960 --> 01:18:49,439
Speaker 1: is so poppy. Is so not poppy by the way, Poppy,

1683
01:18:49,680 --> 01:18:53,040
Speaker 1: if you're listening in the future, you are so smart

1684
01:18:53,200 --> 01:18:55,320
Speaker 1: and like the fact that you can't talk yet, it's

1685
01:18:55,360 --> 01:18:58,639
Speaker 1: like it's so weird to me because I know there's

1686
01:18:58,720 --> 01:19:00,280
Speaker 1: so much going on in your head and like you

1687
01:19:00,439 --> 01:19:03,760
Speaker 1: understand so much more than maybe even I do, And

1688
01:19:03,800 --> 01:19:06,160
Speaker 1: so I can't wait till you start like really talking

1689
01:19:06,240 --> 01:19:08,280
Speaker 1: and sharing what's in your head, because you are so

1690
01:19:08,439 --> 01:19:12,120
Speaker 1: not poppy. Poppy, You're not poppy. Um, But I think

1691
01:19:12,160 --> 01:19:16,160
Speaker 1: it's so funny. My top thing. I had a hard

1692
01:19:16,200 --> 01:19:18,040
Speaker 1: time with this because my dad does say so many

1693
01:19:18,120 --> 01:19:21,560
Speaker 1: like great things about me. But he I'll read a

1694
01:19:21,640 --> 01:19:25,360
Speaker 1: text that I got from him this weekend, uh about

1695
01:19:25,560 --> 01:19:28,960
Speaker 1: the trip that we had this weekend. It was really sweet.

1696
01:19:29,000 --> 01:19:31,360
Speaker 1: My dad cried backstage of Bill Maher. Both my mom

1697
01:19:31,439 --> 01:19:34,120
Speaker 1: and they don't usually cry that much about the stuff,

1698
01:19:34,120 --> 01:19:36,840
Speaker 1: Like they'll tear up when. My dad will tear up

1699
01:19:36,880 --> 01:19:38,479
Speaker 1: a lot more than my mom in terms of like

1700
01:19:38,600 --> 01:19:41,200
Speaker 1: pride for me, especially when his heroes, Like he hears

1701
01:19:41,240 --> 01:19:43,719
Speaker 1: his heroes like like me or like I've been accepted

1702
01:19:43,760 --> 01:19:46,640
Speaker 1: in some way by like the industry, and like he

1703
01:19:46,720 --> 01:19:48,920
Speaker 1: gets emotional, like it'll be like I'm well enough. Like

1704
01:19:49,080 --> 01:19:52,559
Speaker 1: it's really sweet and um. But when after we got

1705
01:19:52,600 --> 01:19:54,640
Speaker 1: done with Bill Maher, I sat in the audience with them.

1706
01:19:54,680 --> 01:19:56,479
Speaker 1: My segment was, first we watched the whole show, had

1707
01:19:56,520 --> 01:19:58,880
Speaker 1: a great time, and then we went backstage because I asked, like,

1708
01:19:59,080 --> 01:20:00,479
Speaker 1: is there any way that might it's gonna get a

1709
01:20:00,520 --> 01:20:02,439
Speaker 1: picture with Bill afterwards. So we're waiting in this room

1710
01:20:02,479 --> 01:20:04,240
Speaker 1: waiting for Bill to show up. After he like you know,

1711
01:20:04,400 --> 01:20:06,320
Speaker 1: changes out of his suit and he's like getting ready

1712
01:20:06,320 --> 01:20:09,240
Speaker 1: to go, he stops by or no, while we're waiting.

1713
01:20:10,080 --> 01:20:12,920
Speaker 1: We're there in this like kind of green room area,

1714
01:20:13,120 --> 01:20:15,680
Speaker 1: and I was just like so like I was just

1715
01:20:15,720 --> 01:20:17,120
Speaker 1: in a good mood, but like not wanting to be

1716
01:20:17,200 --> 01:20:18,960
Speaker 1: like how good was you know? I didn't, I really

1717
01:20:19,120 --> 01:20:20,680
Speaker 1: I felt good about it. I didn't need to hear that.

1718
01:20:20,760 --> 01:20:23,040
Speaker 1: But they were but might they were both just like

1719
01:20:23,800 --> 01:20:25,840
Speaker 1: I can't I can't think about how good you just

1720
01:20:25,960 --> 01:20:28,000
Speaker 1: were and how much you know the fact that he

1721
01:20:28,120 --> 01:20:30,320
Speaker 1: goes like, I love you, America's falling in love with you,

1722
01:20:30,560 --> 01:20:33,320
Speaker 1: like him to say those things and and give me

1723
01:20:33,439 --> 01:20:35,640
Speaker 1: that like stamp of approval from the guy that is,

1724
01:20:35,680 --> 01:20:39,320
Speaker 1: they're like they value his opinion about people and politics

1725
01:20:39,360 --> 01:20:42,200
Speaker 1: and everything so much, whether or not he's right or

1726
01:20:42,200 --> 01:20:44,599
Speaker 1: whether or not they're right. It's just like the number

1727
01:20:44,640 --> 01:20:47,120
Speaker 1: one person. It's like Obama, Obama saying that I'm cool

1728
01:20:47,280 --> 01:20:50,360
Speaker 1: or something like they got they were both like that

1729
01:20:50,560 --> 01:20:52,880
Speaker 1: was just like that was insane, Like they were just

1730
01:20:53,000 --> 01:20:55,360
Speaker 1: so proud. It wasn't like it was the first time

1731
01:20:55,360 --> 01:20:59,040
Speaker 1: I had seen like they they can't believe and I go, well,

1732
01:20:59,120 --> 01:21:01,920
Speaker 1: you made I go. They go, My mom goes, I

1733
01:21:02,000 --> 01:21:04,600
Speaker 1: just don't understand that, like how who you are? Like

1734
01:21:04,680 --> 01:21:06,479
Speaker 1: what I just she was like I just can't handle it.

1735
01:21:06,479 --> 01:21:08,439
Speaker 1: And I go, well, you guys made me and there

1736
01:21:08,479 --> 01:21:10,120
Speaker 1: go we we had nothing to do with that. And

1737
01:21:10,160 --> 01:21:12,320
Speaker 1: I go, yes, you did, like I was able to

1738
01:21:12,360 --> 01:21:14,800
Speaker 1: do that because if you guys like you know, it

1739
01:21:14,880 --> 01:21:17,200
Speaker 1: wasn't adopted, not that even if adopted, like even if

1740
01:21:17,240 --> 01:21:19,240
Speaker 1: I was adopted, they made that like it's I go,

1741
01:21:19,360 --> 01:21:22,880
Speaker 1: it's nurture. Um, so that was your that's what you did.

1742
01:21:22,960 --> 01:21:28,280
Speaker 1: But so um my dad said, uh, oh ship he

1743
01:21:28,320 --> 01:21:29,920
Speaker 1: wrote it on the thing with my mom and dad.

1744
01:21:30,160 --> 01:21:32,960
Speaker 1: He goes, what a fun time, so great to meet

1745
01:21:33,000 --> 01:21:36,719
Speaker 1: and hang out. Um wait, can I fuck? He wrote

1746
01:21:36,760 --> 01:21:39,960
Speaker 1: a whole thing. Goddamn it. One second you guys, Um,

1747
01:21:41,000 --> 01:21:48,000
Speaker 1: do you tell Bill marta Garish Handley story? He said, Uh,

1748
01:21:48,840 --> 01:21:52,000
Speaker 1: that was a legendary day. Oh this was um after

1749
01:21:52,040 --> 01:21:54,080
Speaker 1: this is Friday after Bill maher. He sent me after

1750
01:21:54,160 --> 01:21:56,360
Speaker 1: we said goodbye, my parents went to their hotel room.

1751
01:21:56,600 --> 01:21:58,560
Speaker 1: My dad text My dad like sent me at u

1752
01:21:58,680 --> 01:22:01,519
Speaker 1: up text at um baby. He wrote, that was a

1753
01:22:01,600 --> 01:22:03,920
Speaker 1: legendary day and night of my life. I'm so proud

1754
01:22:03,960 --> 01:22:06,600
Speaker 1: of the person you are. I love you, Dad. And

1755
01:22:06,680 --> 01:22:09,280
Speaker 1: he never like writes he never like it was just

1756
01:22:09,400 --> 01:22:12,240
Speaker 1: like so sweet. But I think it's it's that like

1757
01:22:13,200 --> 01:22:14,960
Speaker 1: It's funny when I when my mom was able to

1758
01:22:15,000 --> 01:22:16,679
Speaker 1: take credit from me and go and I was able

1759
01:22:16,680 --> 01:22:20,240
Speaker 1: to go, like, Mom, I'm great because of you. That

1760
01:22:20,640 --> 01:22:22,800
Speaker 1: was like I always want to remind my mom it's

1761
01:22:22,840 --> 01:22:24,720
Speaker 1: because of you, and I sometimes want to remind my

1762
01:22:24,840 --> 01:22:27,760
Speaker 1: dad it's not all you, like you know what my dad.

1763
01:22:27,840 --> 01:22:30,800
Speaker 1: Like my dad was to take credit for I would say,

1764
01:22:30,920 --> 01:22:32,960
Speaker 1: is quicker to take credit like that's my daughter and

1765
01:22:33,120 --> 01:22:35,439
Speaker 1: I am responsible for some of that in a good way,

1766
01:22:36,040 --> 01:22:39,680
Speaker 1: whereas my mom is like that I don't even know

1767
01:22:39,760 --> 01:22:41,240
Speaker 1: how I made you. You're not You're not from me,

1768
01:22:41,280 --> 01:22:43,360
Speaker 1: And I go, no, Mom, it is from you and Dad,

1769
01:22:44,000 --> 01:22:45,760
Speaker 1: it's not all you. Like as some of this is

1770
01:22:45,880 --> 01:22:47,840
Speaker 1: like trying not to be you dad, like you know

1771
01:22:47,880 --> 01:22:50,280
Speaker 1: what I mean. But uh, for the first time, my

1772
01:22:50,400 --> 01:22:52,800
Speaker 1: dad didn't. It wasn't about him. It wasn't about like

1773
01:22:53,439 --> 01:22:56,120
Speaker 1: I'm your father and like, it's so cool to be

1774
01:22:56,439 --> 01:22:59,280
Speaker 1: the dad of this person. It's like and that I

1775
01:22:59,479 --> 01:23:00,680
Speaker 1: might have had to do with it. It was like

1776
01:23:01,040 --> 01:23:06,080
Speaker 1: you are special and um, yeah, my mom the other night,

1777
01:23:06,160 --> 01:23:07,920
Speaker 1: she was drunk at the Ben Glaves party, but she

1778
01:23:08,040 --> 01:23:09,880
Speaker 1: came up to me and she told me yesterday she

1779
01:23:09,960 --> 01:23:12,000
Speaker 1: was like you should hear the way Ben had talked

1780
01:23:12,040 --> 01:23:14,320
Speaker 1: talked about you to me, and Ben so sweet everyone

1781
01:23:14,360 --> 01:23:15,840
Speaker 1: at the party. He goes, Nikki, I want you to

1782
01:23:15,880 --> 01:23:17,680
Speaker 1: meet this person. They're one of the best producers. Like

1783
01:23:17,720 --> 01:23:19,679
Speaker 1: he interrogets everyone with their best credit and like talks

1784
01:23:19,720 --> 01:23:21,160
Speaker 1: him up. So he does this a lot, but he's

1785
01:23:21,160 --> 01:23:22,920
Speaker 1: telling the truth. But he told my mom. He goes,

1786
01:23:23,200 --> 01:23:26,320
Speaker 1: you need to understand your daughter, Like, I don't think

1787
01:23:26,320 --> 01:23:31,840
Speaker 1: you understand she's an icon. Final thought last night at dinner, Um,

1788
01:23:32,320 --> 01:23:34,519
Speaker 1: I went to there with Spade at like six fifteen.

1789
01:23:34,600 --> 01:23:36,560
Speaker 1: He was goes early. I had to said at and

1790
01:23:36,720 --> 01:23:39,400
Speaker 1: I met him at dinner and then I go, can

1791
01:23:39,479 --> 01:23:41,400
Speaker 1: I have my mom come later so we can get

1792
01:23:41,439 --> 01:23:44,280
Speaker 1: some alone time? And then my mom she just she's awesome.

1793
01:23:44,360 --> 01:23:46,240
Speaker 1: She's not like regular moms. And he was like, of course,

1794
01:23:46,439 --> 01:23:48,280
Speaker 1: So my mom came at seven thirty. We had a

1795
01:23:48,280 --> 01:23:53,280
Speaker 1: great time. And while I was like texting that I

1796
01:23:53,360 --> 01:23:55,559
Speaker 1: was going to be later or something, I heard him

1797
01:23:55,800 --> 01:23:57,160
Speaker 1: talking to her and I was trying to like not

1798
01:23:57,560 --> 01:24:01,200
Speaker 1: hear it, and he goes, and I mean, Savid fucking Spade.

1799
01:24:01,200 --> 01:24:03,160
Speaker 1: Everyone knows how I feel about him. He's literally the

1800
01:24:03,160 --> 01:24:05,160
Speaker 1: funniest person a live and which my mom confirmed last night.

1801
01:24:05,200 --> 01:24:07,439
Speaker 1: She goes, oh my god, Nicky, I can't believe how

1802
01:24:07,520 --> 01:24:09,880
Speaker 1: funny he is and how she goes, he's timeless. He

1803
01:24:09,920 --> 01:24:12,840
Speaker 1: doesn't look any different than on just shoot me. He

1804
01:24:12,920 --> 01:24:16,120
Speaker 1: looks the same. I mean, he looks so young and

1805
01:24:16,320 --> 01:24:18,439
Speaker 1: um and he has the spirit of a young person too.

1806
01:24:18,520 --> 01:24:20,320
Speaker 1: And last night I even said to David, I was like,

1807
01:24:20,560 --> 01:24:23,200
Speaker 1: because he was talking about he has a daughter, um

1808
01:24:23,280 --> 01:24:24,960
Speaker 1: who's in middle school, and he's like, I don't you know,

1809
01:24:25,040 --> 01:24:26,559
Speaker 1: I don't want a visitor at school. I don't want

1810
01:24:26,560 --> 01:24:28,240
Speaker 1: her friends to know like who I am because I

1811
01:24:28,240 --> 01:24:29,560
Speaker 1: don't want her to get teased for it. And I go,

1812
01:24:29,640 --> 01:24:32,240
Speaker 1: you're right, Like in middle school people are so girls

1813
01:24:32,240 --> 01:24:35,320
Speaker 1: are so jealous that's of someone famous, that they might

1814
01:24:35,360 --> 01:24:37,280
Speaker 1: be bullier for it. But in high school, it's gonna

1815
01:24:37,280 --> 01:24:39,080
Speaker 1: make her cool, so you should stop by her high school.

1816
01:24:39,160 --> 01:24:41,280
Speaker 1: And he goes, but it's they're not gonna know who

1817
01:24:41,280 --> 01:24:43,880
Speaker 1: I am, and I go, I go, you're cool. I go,

1818
01:24:44,160 --> 01:24:45,840
Speaker 1: you know you're cool, right, Like you've been cool since

1819
01:24:45,840 --> 01:24:47,840
Speaker 1: you came on the scene, and you're always gonna be cool.

1820
01:24:47,880 --> 01:24:51,040
Speaker 1: I go, Coolness for you does not go away, Like

1821
01:24:51,240 --> 01:24:53,720
Speaker 1: you're always cool. Everyone will always think you're cool. I go,

1822
01:24:53,760 --> 01:24:55,280
Speaker 1: you'll be cool when you're a hundred. You're gonna be

1823
01:24:55,320 --> 01:24:57,479
Speaker 1: like the epitome cool. And he was like, thanks for

1824
01:24:57,560 --> 01:24:59,439
Speaker 1: saying that. I'm like, it's just true. And my mom

1825
01:24:59,560 --> 01:25:02,400
Speaker 1: later and go, he's timeless, and I go, you're absolutely right.

1826
01:25:02,479 --> 01:25:04,519
Speaker 1: David Smaid is fucking he's he's the same person that

1827
01:25:04,560 --> 01:25:07,760
Speaker 1: you met on SNL when he did Hollywood Minute and goes, uh,

1828
01:25:08,080 --> 01:25:10,479
Speaker 1: he goes, I saw the bodyguard this weekend and UH

1829
01:25:12,479 --> 01:25:16,040
Speaker 1: want my money back. He's like, um, oh, sorry, sorry,

1830
01:25:16,040 --> 01:25:19,000
Speaker 1: I don't mean good. What does he know like Tom Petty?

1831
01:25:19,040 --> 01:25:21,439
Speaker 1: You know Tom Petty never really aged until he dies.

1832
01:25:22,320 --> 01:25:24,479
Speaker 1: And granted they have like the same kind of blonde hair,

1833
01:25:24,680 --> 01:25:28,679
Speaker 1: but like it's that same vibe of just And here's

1834
01:25:28,680 --> 01:25:32,160
Speaker 1: the thing, David smaide, you don't if you got introduced

1835
01:25:32,200 --> 01:25:34,120
Speaker 1: to her high school friends, they don't need to know

1836
01:25:34,280 --> 01:25:37,880
Speaker 1: you as David's You're already like in person cool enough

1837
01:25:38,080 --> 01:25:42,840
Speaker 1: without that. I told him last night. I go, I'm

1838
01:25:42,920 --> 01:25:45,559
Speaker 1: not joking you. The biggest achievement of my career as

1839
01:25:45,600 --> 01:25:47,400
Speaker 1: being friends with you, like actual friends with you. And

1840
01:25:47,720 --> 01:25:49,280
Speaker 1: I will say that till the day I die until

1841
01:25:49,320 --> 01:25:51,200
Speaker 1: I meet become friends of Taylor Swift. But for now,

1842
01:25:51,360 --> 01:25:55,000
Speaker 1: being friends with David's made real friends. Like where he's

1843
01:25:55,040 --> 01:25:57,080
Speaker 1: on my top, he's a he's a best friend for

1844
01:25:57,200 --> 01:25:59,320
Speaker 1: me in terms of what we shared and what he

1845
01:25:59,400 --> 01:26:02,280
Speaker 1: shared with me, that is the coolest thing of my life.

1846
01:26:02,320 --> 01:26:04,000
Speaker 1: But he told my mom last night, I'm sorry this

1847
01:26:04,040 --> 01:26:06,439
Speaker 1: is turning into a breakfast. But he told my mama's

1848
01:26:06,600 --> 01:26:09,880
Speaker 1: when I wasn't listening, because she later told me, Uh,

1849
01:26:10,439 --> 01:26:12,679
Speaker 1: he was like just saying, like, she goes, well, Nikki

1850
01:26:12,800 --> 01:26:14,439
Speaker 1: just loves you so much, and and he was like,

1851
01:26:14,520 --> 01:26:16,640
Speaker 1: we love Nikki, and like was just being like, you know,

1852
01:26:16,800 --> 01:26:19,000
Speaker 1: telling a mom what she wants to hear kind of thing.

1853
01:26:19,280 --> 01:26:21,320
Speaker 1: But later on we were getting an uber home and

1854
01:26:21,360 --> 01:26:23,600
Speaker 1: I go, how fun was that fucking Spading? She was like,

1855
01:26:23,720 --> 01:26:26,639
Speaker 1: I can't get over it. She was thinking he said

1856
01:26:26,680 --> 01:26:28,840
Speaker 1: the nicest things about you, and I go, really, I

1857
01:26:28,880 --> 01:26:30,960
Speaker 1: go what he's saying. She was like, he just said,

1858
01:26:31,080 --> 01:26:35,920
Speaker 1: your daughter is very well respected by this industry, Like

1859
01:26:36,040 --> 01:26:39,280
Speaker 1: everyone talks well about her and she's very well respected.

1860
01:26:39,439 --> 01:26:42,720
Speaker 1: And having that come from David Spade to my mom,

1861
01:26:43,280 --> 01:26:46,160
Speaker 1: like that David Spade respects me artistically, you know, like

1862
01:26:46,240 --> 01:26:50,719
Speaker 1: not just as a person, was like, you know, there's

1863
01:26:51,200 --> 01:26:53,120
Speaker 1: it's done. I've I don't. I don't need to do

1864
01:26:53,160 --> 01:26:55,439
Speaker 1: anything else like this whole dream of like wanting my

1865
01:26:55,560 --> 01:26:57,719
Speaker 1: parents to think I'm cool, and that's why we're driven

1866
01:26:57,760 --> 01:27:00,160
Speaker 1: by everything. That's like our parents trying. It's really is that,

1867
01:27:00,200 --> 01:27:02,760
Speaker 1: like mom and daddy, look at me. I've got it now.

1868
01:27:02,880 --> 01:27:04,639
Speaker 1: I just need them to Now. I need to become

1869
01:27:04,680 --> 01:27:06,120
Speaker 1: a pop star and prove to my dad that I

1870
01:27:06,240 --> 01:27:08,559
Speaker 1: actually I am a great singer. Yeah, yeah, you definitely

1871
01:27:08,560 --> 01:27:11,000
Speaker 1: need to keep working. You haven't achieved. I don't even

1872
01:27:11,080 --> 01:27:14,160
Speaker 1: think about it. Final thought if no, no, no, I

1873
01:27:14,240 --> 01:27:16,040
Speaker 1: just want to be a pop star. You took a

1874
01:27:16,160 --> 01:27:18,640
Speaker 1: happy thing. I was kidding. I was cutting it with

1875
01:27:18,880 --> 01:27:24,400
Speaker 1: I was. It was a joke. And I need I

1876
01:27:24,479 --> 01:27:26,880
Speaker 1: need to drive, I need things to like, I need

1877
01:27:26,960 --> 01:27:29,200
Speaker 1: a new goal, and my goals have already been met. Yeah,

1878
01:27:29,200 --> 01:27:31,240
Speaker 1: I'd like to Hostess now, but I really I don't

1879
01:27:31,280 --> 01:27:33,320
Speaker 1: need to. I've literally done everything I want to do.

1880
01:27:33,760 --> 01:27:37,120
Speaker 1: Um but besides be friends with Taylor Swift and maybe

1881
01:27:37,160 --> 01:27:39,240
Speaker 1: perform with her some day like an after part the

1882
01:27:39,280 --> 01:27:43,559
Speaker 1: Grammys or something where tell you that she loved your outfit.

1883
01:27:43,680 --> 01:27:46,880
Speaker 1: The other night. Thank you. Yeah, I know I just

1884
01:27:46,920 --> 01:27:48,680
Speaker 1: said that too. We'll talk about more, Bill Mars. I

1885
01:27:48,760 --> 01:27:50,519
Speaker 1: have so much more to get into from this weekend,

1886
01:27:50,880 --> 01:27:53,760
Speaker 1: but I do want to say that, UM, if you

1887
01:27:53,840 --> 01:27:55,519
Speaker 1: live in the St. Louis area or would like to

1888
01:27:55,600 --> 01:27:58,439
Speaker 1: make a trip to the St. Louis area Thursday night.

1889
01:27:58,520 --> 01:28:01,760
Speaker 1: This Thursday Night at Joe's Cafe, which is a really

1890
01:28:01,840 --> 01:28:04,320
Speaker 1: cool venue in St. Louis, my dad will be performing

1891
01:28:04,400 --> 01:28:06,559
Speaker 1: with his band, Glaze in the Moon Kings from eight

1892
01:28:06,640 --> 01:28:10,160
Speaker 1: to ten doors at seven Joe's Cafe in St. Louis.

1893
01:28:10,320 --> 01:28:13,320
Speaker 1: You can go to tickets. UM Edgeler. You can follow

1894
01:28:13,439 --> 01:28:17,120
Speaker 1: him on Instagram E D G E U L A R.

1895
01:28:17,160 --> 01:28:19,800
Speaker 1: Don't ask me why Edgeler and then he has all

1896
01:28:19,840 --> 01:28:22,400
Speaker 1: the info in the um in the post his most

1897
01:28:22,439 --> 01:28:26,000
Speaker 1: recent post, I believe um and Yeah, Joe's Cafe, my

1898
01:28:26,120 --> 01:28:29,719
Speaker 1: dad is going to perform and I'll probably be there. Andrew,

1899
01:28:30,000 --> 01:28:34,400
Speaker 1: are you in town on Thursday? I'll be there, Um, besties,

1900
01:28:34,439 --> 01:28:37,000
Speaker 1: we'd love to see you come out and UM, and

1901
01:28:37,160 --> 01:28:38,840
Speaker 1: my dad's just really talented, so I'm not asking you

1902
01:28:38,920 --> 01:28:41,880
Speaker 1: to go watch something that's gonna suck. His band is great,

1903
01:28:41,920 --> 01:28:44,080
Speaker 1: Glaze in the Moon Kings and um, yeah, so I'll

1904
01:28:44,120 --> 01:28:47,880
Speaker 1: see you there. Andrew, Uh, what are you doing today today?

1905
01:28:48,320 --> 01:28:50,280
Speaker 1: I don't know. I'll probably go hit some golf balls

1906
01:28:50,320 --> 01:28:52,800
Speaker 1: with my dad and my brothers. And we watched the

1907
01:28:52,920 --> 01:28:56,360
Speaker 1: US Open on Sunday. It was a father's day US

1908
01:28:56,439 --> 01:29:01,040
Speaker 1: Open as a family. It's fantastic. It really is incredible.

1909
01:29:01,080 --> 01:29:03,240
Speaker 1: And it was an incredible match and I could get

1910
01:29:03,280 --> 01:29:10,960
Speaker 1: into it tomorrow. Oh wait, that's not golf funk. I

1911
01:29:11,040 --> 01:29:16,200
Speaker 1: was thinking of, um, tennis. Know this guy, Oh my god,

1912
01:29:16,240 --> 01:29:18,880
Speaker 1: you would like this story. This guy rom r a

1913
01:29:19,240 --> 01:29:22,439
Speaker 1: h M. He won last tournament he was in. He

1914
01:29:22,600 --> 01:29:25,000
Speaker 1: was up by five or six strokes. He had like

1915
01:29:25,040 --> 01:29:27,320
Speaker 1: a few more holes to play. He was gonna make

1916
01:29:27,360 --> 01:29:29,680
Speaker 1: like six million dollars. And they came up to him

1917
01:29:29,760 --> 01:29:32,400
Speaker 1: on the course and go, hey, you tested posit for COVID.

1918
01:29:32,479 --> 01:29:35,960
Speaker 1: You can't finish. Oh my god. So he's like, Karmen.

1919
01:29:36,040 --> 01:29:38,880
Speaker 1: He goes, They interviewed him, they go, look, I went home.

1920
01:29:39,200 --> 01:29:40,920
Speaker 1: I was like, Karma is gonna work out for me.

1921
01:29:41,080 --> 01:29:43,640
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna be upset about this. Something better is

1922
01:29:43,680 --> 01:29:45,880
Speaker 1: going to come up. And two weeks later, he won

1923
01:29:45,960 --> 01:29:48,000
Speaker 1: the US Open, sucking wrong. He said that he was like,

1924
01:29:48,040 --> 01:29:52,240
Speaker 1: I'm not going to take this as a loss. Yes, yes,

1925
01:29:52,479 --> 01:29:56,360
Speaker 1: let's rom it out. Don't be a poppy if you're poppy.

1926
01:29:57,000 --> 01:30:00,240
Speaker 1: We coined a new phrase today, guys, So besties get

1927
01:30:00,280 --> 01:30:02,720
Speaker 1: in Poppy means dumb but poppy. If you're listening in

1928
01:30:02,720 --> 01:30:04,760
Speaker 1: the future, you're not poppy. It's just because, I mean,

1929
01:30:04,760 --> 01:30:06,639
Speaker 1: because you're a baby. I set it up in the beginning.

1930
01:30:06,680 --> 01:30:08,880
Speaker 1: Go back and listen to it. Poppy in the future. Um,

1931
01:30:09,000 --> 01:30:11,240
Speaker 1: and I'm I'm sorry that I wasn't the aunt you

1932
01:30:11,280 --> 01:30:12,760
Speaker 1: wanted to be. And I'll bring you a president next

1933
01:30:13,439 --> 01:30:16,120
Speaker 1: if you're nice to yourself, because it's always contingent on

1934
01:30:16,200 --> 01:30:18,320
Speaker 1: being nice to Poppy Harlow. If you're listening, you're not listening.

1935
01:30:18,520 --> 01:30:22,519
Speaker 1: Uh yeah, Um, Andrew, have a great day. I'll see

1936
01:30:22,520 --> 01:30:24,680
Speaker 1: you tomorrow. No, uh, have a great day. I will

1937
01:30:24,720 --> 01:30:27,679
Speaker 1: see you tomorrow. And besties, I will see you around

1938
01:30:27,760 --> 01:30:29,639
Speaker 1: town in l A. I. Um, I don't think I'm

1939
01:30:29,640 --> 01:30:32,040
Speaker 1: doing any more shows, but love when you say hi.

1940
01:30:32,640 --> 01:30:34,320
Speaker 1: You guys are the best. Thank you for listening. We'll

1941
01:30:34,320 --> 01:30:36,080
Speaker 1: see tomorrow. On The Nikki Glazer Podcast