WEBVTT - Ep110: What's a Doula do? Feat Michellee 0:00:02.600 --> 0:00:05.480 Hey, everybody, welcome to another episode of Horrible Decisions. My 0:00:05.559 --> 0:00:07.920 name is Wheezy, this girl Mandy, and we have a 0:00:07.960 --> 0:00:10.080 guest in the studio whose name I'm going to get 0:00:10.200 --> 0:00:14.160 right because it is this is so much pressure, that's 0:00:14.200 --> 0:00:18.480 so easy. Michelle mich Shelley is in the studio today. 0:00:18.600 --> 0:00:22.240 Because I was a little inspired to have all of us, 0:00:22.320 --> 0:00:26.000 not just men, but women as well, have a lot 0:00:26.120 --> 0:00:29.560 more respect for mama's I tweeted that I was on 0:00:29.640 --> 0:00:33.080 Bleaker Street going up the subway steps and this girl 0:00:33.320 --> 0:00:35.519 was carrying her baby up the stairs, and when I 0:00:35.560 --> 0:00:37.600 offered to help her, she said, I got it. Cist, 0:00:37.720 --> 0:00:40.199 these men can watch me do it by myself. She 0:00:40.360 --> 0:00:42.279 was really piste off because it was a long way up. 0:00:42.720 --> 0:00:44.560 And for those of you that live in New Yorker 0:00:44.640 --> 0:00:46.240 have seen in the news there was a woman who 0:00:46.280 --> 0:00:49.640 died recently midtown after like a stroller fell on top 0:00:49.680 --> 0:00:52.640 of her. She was carrying her child. Child lived she didn't. 0:00:52.680 --> 0:00:55.920 So I want us to all finished this hour up 0:00:55.960 --> 0:00:58.160 with a lot more respect for women helping out moms 0:00:58.160 --> 0:01:00.800 in the street with strollers. Whatever we got to do, 0:01:00.880 --> 0:01:05.399 our sisters, our moms are girlfriends, baby mamas, all of them. 0:01:05.440 --> 0:01:08.480 So let's get it started. How much blood comes out 0:01:08.920 --> 0:01:12.680 a lot? Okay, I was just kidding. Actually, let's start 0:01:12.680 --> 0:01:16.199 with Okay, we don't want to start with the book. 0:01:16.200 --> 0:01:21.559 We're gonna start slow. You don't want the nasty stuff yet, Okay, 0:01:20.560 --> 0:01:23.880 we take it easy. Listen, this is how we all 0:01:23.920 --> 0:01:26.280 got here. Technically, we need this episode, you know what 0:01:26.280 --> 0:01:29.160 I'm saying. Um, let's start with kink of the week though. Alright, 0:01:29.240 --> 0:01:31.679 so guys, we're going to start with our kink of 0:01:31.680 --> 0:01:34.080 the week. As you know, every week we bring you 0:01:34.080 --> 0:01:37.319 guys a kink. Lets you know the paraphilia and the 0:01:37.480 --> 0:01:41.000 kind of medical term of that. Um and so this 0:01:41.040 --> 0:01:46.399 week it is Zoomi tophilia or pophilia. I don't know, 0:01:46.600 --> 0:01:51.640 so Zoomi tophilia. It is another more modern fetish incarnation. 0:01:51.840 --> 0:01:53.960 I really was gonna say that different what I was 0:01:53.960 --> 0:01:58.560 gonna say, zoo my pophilia. Oh I did say that 0:01:58.840 --> 0:02:02.240 is probably not all right? Probably is zu Mitho. You're right, 0:02:02.640 --> 0:02:09.280 that's real elementary Zumi sophelia. Okay, it you says my thought. Okay, 0:02:09.960 --> 0:02:14.000 Lactually it was real childish zoom me you right, Okay, 0:02:14.000 --> 0:02:19.959 bitch zu Mitho. There we go, I like zametho. Zamitho. Okay, bitch, 0:02:19.960 --> 0:02:26.320 it ain't zoom me. You're right. Another more modern fetish incarnation, zamitophobia, 0:02:26.919 --> 0:02:30.200 describes the act of being turned on by the thoughts 0:02:30.280 --> 0:02:35.280 of having sex with mythical creatures and animals. These would 0:02:35.320 --> 0:02:41.240 be such as trolls, werewolves, dragons, and merman or mermaids 0:02:41.400 --> 0:02:45.240 um and no mythical creature stays sacred stinks. See why 0:02:45.280 --> 0:02:47.880 you gotta words? I don't know what that word is. 0:02:49.400 --> 0:02:51.839 I totally get the dragon thing because after watching Game 0:02:51.840 --> 0:02:53.800 of Thrones, you want to wait, what is it? You 0:02:53.800 --> 0:02:57.040 want to dragons? They're like lizards. You got iguanas with 0:02:57.240 --> 0:02:59.120 in Florida. Bitch, I mean, I don't want to think 0:02:59.160 --> 0:03:05.839 about some alligators. I'm just saying that. Getting that's kind 0:03:05.840 --> 0:03:10.040 of bestality, bro, I say all mythical creatures. She goes 0:03:10.440 --> 0:03:17.040 d dragging my ship. I went straight to Twilight Ben 0:03:17.480 --> 0:03:21.840 with the goddamn where wolf like before where we wait 0:03:21.919 --> 0:03:25.959 down saying dogs? So now where wolds? What would I 0:03:26.360 --> 0:03:28.840 what mythical creature? I want to suck? So you know what? 0:03:29.120 --> 0:03:31.120 And I don't know if this is bestality too, though, 0:03:31.480 --> 0:03:33.720 like the half man half horse, because that did go 0:03:33.880 --> 0:03:40.080 be big? What's it called mega mega metatur? Cent centaur? 0:03:41.080 --> 0:03:43.640 Are you listening to this right now? And you know 0:03:43.680 --> 0:03:46.280 what it is screaming into your headphone? It's a metal, 0:03:46.320 --> 0:03:53.840 it's a metatur. Well that's what I wanted here when 0:03:53.880 --> 0:03:58.400 we had white people, when anyone's here that Niger had notes, 0:03:58.960 --> 0:04:01.400 he had it right, Yeah, we're gonna look, don't be 0:04:02.120 --> 0:04:07.480 every time. I'm not that serious. She was right, she said, Centaur. 0:04:10.000 --> 0:04:12.360 So I feel like if but so the problem is 0:04:12.400 --> 0:04:14.320 I've never seen a black man, so would have to 0:04:14.360 --> 0:04:17.640 be half black man, half horse type in black. He 0:04:17.720 --> 0:04:20.880 got dress on Google? He got dressed. Oh yeah, I'll 0:04:20.920 --> 0:04:23.560 fuck him. Hold on, look, why are you looking up? 0:04:23.600 --> 0:04:32.200 Don't look up? Black horse? Maybe African American centaur? Oh 0:04:32.240 --> 0:04:35.000 wait wait wait, don't not that one front. That's not 0:04:35.080 --> 0:04:37.920 a good image. Okay, so the second wait wait, wait, 0:04:37.960 --> 0:04:40.279 what mythical creature? Let's let's get off the animals. What 0:04:40.360 --> 0:04:43.960 other mythical creature? Would you like? A wizard? Oh, I 0:04:44.720 --> 0:04:49.839 I'll fun will Smith. That don't count. That's like a genie. Okay, 0:04:50.120 --> 0:04:53.560 genie is a mythical create What about you? I for money, 0:04:53.560 --> 0:04:55.000 I'd be like, let me get. Why do you think 0:04:55.000 --> 0:04:57.840 gott to be for money? Just say you want because 0:04:57.839 --> 0:05:00.160 I'm saying one of my wishes gonna be money. It's 0:05:00.160 --> 0:05:02.320 something like, if you get a wish, you ain't gotta 0:05:02.320 --> 0:05:05.040 sucking for the money. You just wish sucking for one more? 0:05:05.080 --> 0:05:07.279 You get three? Right, you get three wishes. Let me 0:05:07.320 --> 0:05:13.040 see what about a troll? Nah? A ugly trolls are 0:05:13.080 --> 0:05:16.200 like midgets? Yeah, my bad. I know you'd be coming 0:05:16.200 --> 0:05:18.240 for me. But they called me midgets all they called 0:05:18.279 --> 0:05:22.400 me a midget. Oh yeah, I ain't fucking I'm good. 0:05:22.560 --> 0:05:24.920 There's a hilarious joke that I think. It's um. John 0:05:25.080 --> 0:05:27.240 Laney tells He's like, when I was doing TV, I 0:05:27.279 --> 0:05:29.800 had this bit or someone said about midget and they 0:05:29.800 --> 0:05:31.400 were like, you can't say that. It's like saying the 0:05:31.520 --> 0:05:32.800 N word. And he's like, you know how I know 0:05:32.920 --> 0:05:38.239 it's not the N word because you just said midget. Fat. 0:05:38.760 --> 0:05:42.560 I mean that facts. I'm trying to really trying wanted 0:05:42.600 --> 0:05:47.320 me to see nine. That's bad. But how much money 0:05:47.360 --> 0:05:50.760 were you looking for? Why we always gotta break up 0:05:50.760 --> 0:05:54.039 the money so how so how much money? How much 0:05:54.080 --> 0:05:57.120 money would I need to sucking? Midget? Basically, ugly face. 0:05:57.640 --> 0:06:01.440 That's what a little birth to? What ugly face? So 0:06:01.760 --> 0:06:04.520 ugly midget? How much money? How much money would you do? 0:06:05.240 --> 0:06:07.360 Like the head? Wait, the hat regular side. I was 0:06:07.640 --> 0:06:10.640 a little person. Just if they're attractive for cheap. No, 0:06:10.760 --> 0:06:12.760 but they have to look like a troll. No, that's 0:06:12.760 --> 0:06:14.200 what I'm saying. They have to look like a troll. 0:06:16.800 --> 0:06:19.480 We're talking about mythical creatures. But I don't know. I mean, 0:06:19.520 --> 0:06:22.120 it's not like I'm doing something crazy. How much money 0:06:22.200 --> 0:06:24.279 you said you would get shipped on for what? Twenty bands? 0:06:24.320 --> 0:06:27.560 Ten bands? You went down? Say that? I said that 0:06:27.680 --> 0:06:30.440 it was a hard ship. I didn't say twenty. I 0:06:30.440 --> 0:06:33.080 said fifty. Okay, So how much you sucking a troll for? 0:06:35.640 --> 0:06:37.800 I want to say higher now, because I mean, if 0:06:37.839 --> 0:06:40.200 y'all know why we get wait, I just wanted prefaces 0:06:40.200 --> 0:06:42.680 by saying if you never heard the ship episode, I 0:06:42.720 --> 0:06:45.240 started at like a quarter mill. But did I work 0:06:45.279 --> 0:06:48.760 my way down? I don't know. I'm going like seventy five. 0:06:49.960 --> 0:06:53.479 You were lying like, hell, bit that image we're looking 0:06:53.520 --> 0:07:01.800 at right now, that i'd have to do that bron out. Okay, 0:07:01.839 --> 0:07:04.120 I can dig it. I can dig their faces a right? 0:07:04.320 --> 0:07:06.000 What is another method. Hold on, where was on? There 0:07:07.520 --> 0:07:10.680 were wolves, dragons, a mermaid? Real quick, that might be 0:07:10.720 --> 0:07:14.480 hot done. That's like Ariel. Yeah he's gonna it's like 0:07:14.600 --> 0:07:20.800 Ariel Mermaid. Oh yeah, he's fine. We ain't got no dick. 0:07:20.920 --> 0:07:27.800 How you gonna eat? That's exactly what y'all doing. You know, 0:07:27.840 --> 0:07:29.400 it's real gross. It would be like if you put 0:07:29.400 --> 0:07:34.840 a goldfish to play with your pussy your clip. Nah, 0:07:34.840 --> 0:07:45.040 that's the black Mermaid. Wait on, y'all, if you're a patron, 0:07:45.320 --> 0:07:48.320 we're gonna definitely ask y'all with which mythical creatures you 0:07:48.400 --> 0:07:50.640 want to, but we're gonna put some pictures up of um, 0:07:50.840 --> 0:07:54.440 these black mermaids. So when Jeeves and I were first dating, 0:07:54.520 --> 0:07:56.920 I thought that, like he really freaked me out. He 0:07:56.960 --> 0:08:00.960 sent me he had like a tumbler thing of like, um, 0:08:00.960 --> 0:08:03.760 not anime, but it was more so like fawns and 0:08:03.880 --> 0:08:06.200 like they had pointy ears and ship and he has 0:08:06.200 --> 0:08:07.840 a mythical creature. Yeah. He was like, you think this 0:08:07.880 --> 0:08:11.120 is hot? And I'm like I could see it, so 0:08:11.200 --> 0:08:14.840 I'm not gonna I used to like, um, what was 0:08:14.880 --> 0:08:18.880 it called Neverland? Um the Peter Pan movie. I they 0:08:18.920 --> 0:08:21.800 looked so cute. Yeah, when they got them little ears 0:08:21.800 --> 0:08:24.680 in that movie. But like, how cute. I mean I 0:08:24.720 --> 0:08:27.080 was young watching the movie, so I got turned. This 0:08:27.080 --> 0:08:30.640 is actually at this point I like, I thought I 0:08:30.720 --> 0:08:32.080 liked white guys. This is when I was like in 0:08:32.080 --> 0:08:34.640 the insynct Backstreet Boys. So when I watched Neverland, I 0:08:34.679 --> 0:08:39.240 was into the little white actors. Now, no, I mean 0:08:40.080 --> 0:08:43.760 I'd rather fun him than the troll. Oh yeah, oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. 0:08:44.400 --> 0:08:48.920 Definitely scissoring situation. I mean, honestly, it's like paraplegic, like 0:08:49.040 --> 0:08:51.360 dudes they can't feel their dick. Remember we were talking 0:08:51.360 --> 0:08:54.520 about was it no, maybe you were here when Ashley 0:08:54.559 --> 0:08:56.199 was here, the girl who was in a wheelchair, and 0:08:56.200 --> 0:08:58.040 we were talking about like people that could jerk you off, 0:08:58.080 --> 0:08:59.599 and like, I mean, we could have figure out a 0:08:59.600 --> 0:09:03.000 way to it. He definitely fingering you with them Finns. 0:09:03.800 --> 0:09:06.720 I'll take it. It might be slim and like, oh 0:09:06.800 --> 0:09:11.160 it's slapping. That's true. So I do want to say, 0:09:11.200 --> 0:09:14.680 if you guys have not checked us out, we were again. 0:09:14.760 --> 0:09:17.600 We mentioned this before on the cover of Salty If 0:09:17.600 --> 0:09:20.560 you guys have not, go to at Salty dot World 0:09:20.679 --> 0:09:23.880 on Instagram, click the link on their bio and subscribe 0:09:23.960 --> 0:09:26.040 to read our interview with them, and then just a 0:09:26.080 --> 0:09:30.880 ton of stories really dope yesterday or maybe this morning 0:09:30.880 --> 0:09:33.120 and said how to talk straight June into pegging, not 0:09:33.200 --> 0:09:35.920 saying that you have to. But what I did was 0:09:35.960 --> 0:09:37.719 I was looking for a news article today and I 0:09:37.800 --> 0:09:39.800 was like, okay, well let me just look on Salty 0:09:40.000 --> 0:09:43.760 and they had a motherhood section. Um so I got. 0:09:43.880 --> 0:09:45.240 I know it's a long one, but I got the 0:09:45.240 --> 0:09:47.520 brunt of what I really found interest ring. I'm so 0:09:47.600 --> 0:09:49.480 glad so we don't have to listen to you read 0:09:49.520 --> 0:09:53.240 it bit so it's a right. Let's get the summary headline. 0:09:53.240 --> 0:09:56.240 And I want to ask, because Michelle has kids, oh 0:09:56.320 --> 0:10:00.160 you have you do have kids now and she's pregnant away, 0:10:01.600 --> 0:10:05.079 why you should buy a sex toy for your teen? Okay? 0:10:05.320 --> 0:10:07.440 What if we taught our children from the beginning to 0:10:07.559 --> 0:10:10.720 not seek out relief of these sexual desires and other people, 0:10:11.160 --> 0:10:14.199 but teach them something that they can relieve themselves. Studies 0:10:14.200 --> 0:10:16.680 have shown the kids that are educated about masturbation and 0:10:16.720 --> 0:10:19.199 do it more confident with their own bodies and sexuality 0:10:20.000 --> 0:10:22.720 are funk. Man. I didn't want to mess it up. 0:10:23.120 --> 0:10:26.600 You already did. It's the fresh it's the fucking what 0:10:26.840 --> 0:10:30.600 is it? It's the presh I don't know, de Fresh. 0:10:30.679 --> 0:10:33.360 It's like tens of thousands of people are going to 0:10:33.440 --> 0:10:36.280 listen to me. You say a word wrong opposed to 0:10:36.320 --> 0:10:40.160 like when I'm just like improvin, I just said ZOOMI yeah, 0:10:40.160 --> 0:10:43.439 but like that was a hard like I almost said 0:10:43.720 --> 0:10:46.800 some random It's just because I don't know. I don't 0:10:46.800 --> 0:10:48.959 want to, Okay. So it's funny that you brought this 0:10:49.120 --> 0:10:51.600 article up though, because if you guys came to our 0:10:51.720 --> 0:10:56.760 d C live show, we brought up masturbating um as 0:10:56.840 --> 0:11:01.079 teens and if parents should punish their children if they 0:11:01.120 --> 0:11:05.240 caught them masturbating, or if we should ship in d 0:11:05.360 --> 0:11:10.000 C was a woman wanting to teach masturbation for ages 0:11:10.040 --> 0:11:12.959 eight to thirteen, and then our audience to the audience 0:11:13.000 --> 0:11:14.920 was they would They said that most of them said 0:11:14.920 --> 0:11:16.320 they wouldn't pun I think all of them said they 0:11:16.320 --> 0:11:18.880 wouldn't punish. But the headline for this ship is like 0:11:19.000 --> 0:11:22.560 normalizing sexuality in subtle ways. Picking a toy for them 0:11:22.600 --> 0:11:25.360 can be awkward, but they're basically saying, you pick it 0:11:25.440 --> 0:11:28.920 and keep the conversation going. And they're saying like, instead 0:11:28.920 --> 0:11:32.400 of um, you know, it says, imagine a kid billy 0:11:32.400 --> 0:11:35.040 who wanted to experiment with harmless as play. If he 0:11:35.080 --> 0:11:37.360 had a small plug to use on himself, he could 0:11:37.360 --> 0:11:39.360 have avoided that e R trip with a sharpie stuck 0:11:39.400 --> 0:11:43.600 in his butt. Okay, so here's here's my thing. And 0:11:43.640 --> 0:11:47.880 I think this is why I even said um, there 0:11:47.960 --> 0:11:50.400 was there was a slight argument in people not wanting 0:11:50.400 --> 0:11:52.320 to exploit this. I shared a story about a friend 0:11:52.360 --> 0:11:56.960 of mine who caught her younger daughter, her daughter's thirteen 0:11:57.040 --> 0:12:03.760 or fourteen, reading um erotic novels and she went immediately 0:12:04.160 --> 0:12:07.040 to take away her laptop, take away her phone, and like, 0:12:07.080 --> 0:12:09.440 oh my god, you should not be reading this. And 0:12:09.480 --> 0:12:12.760 instead of having that sex conversation to where if she's 0:12:12.800 --> 0:12:16.960 being aroused this way, this isn't opening to where you 0:12:16.960 --> 0:12:19.360 guys can have the conversation whether she's masturbating to it, 0:12:19.600 --> 0:12:22.120 whether you know this is what what's arousing her. At 0:12:22.160 --> 0:12:25.319 least she's not maybe playing with the boys yet, Like 0:12:25.559 --> 0:12:29.040 this would have been a conversational, like I've googled like 0:12:29.240 --> 0:12:31.760 people kissing her girls kissings like that. You know, one 0:12:31.800 --> 0:12:33.080 of my friends I might have said it on this 0:12:33.120 --> 0:12:35.880 podcast before, but a close friend of mine, says her daughter. 0:12:35.960 --> 0:12:38.160 She caught her masturbating, and she let her know it 0:12:38.200 --> 0:12:40.640 was okay because the daughter was locking the door, because 0:12:40.640 --> 0:12:42.760 she was like, locked my door too, you ain't walking 0:12:42.800 --> 0:12:49.480 in wait. The daughter just said, Mom, I'm locking my 0:12:49.559 --> 0:12:52.400 door because I'm playing. She didn't, so she kept saying, like, 0:12:52.400 --> 0:12:54.040 why the fund is your door locked? And then she 0:12:54.160 --> 0:12:56.719 told her mom. So then she says, she's like, no, 0:12:56.840 --> 0:12:59.520 this little bit is getting it overboard, talking about I'm stressed, 0:12:59.559 --> 0:13:03.520 I'm as I need to lock my door. That is funny. Yeah, 0:13:03.559 --> 0:13:05.920 that's funny. I mean, I get it. Um So it 0:13:06.000 --> 0:13:08.480 says if you can't do it in person and have 0:13:08.559 --> 0:13:12.040 a talk about masturbation or a toy, it's okay to 0:13:12.120 --> 0:13:13.760 leave the toy in their bed, with the notes saying 0:13:14.240 --> 0:13:17.080 you're going through a lot of changes. This will help 0:13:17.120 --> 0:13:23.319 you explore everybody yourself totally normal. Don't be embarrassed. I'm 0:13:23.400 --> 0:13:26.640 here to talk about it if you want or if not. No, right, 0:13:26.679 --> 0:13:30.760 that's not a solution. I don't like that. One can 0:13:32.000 --> 0:13:33.720 them and asked them if they got the gift and 0:13:33.760 --> 0:13:36.120 if they have any questions. We live in a different 0:13:36.120 --> 0:13:38.000 era than our parents did, and we can't be as 0:13:38.000 --> 0:13:42.480 passive and absent minded about education. So here's the I 0:13:42.480 --> 0:13:46.319 guess here's another thing that I would think of if 0:13:46.360 --> 0:13:50.280 we all look at our childhoods. How many times did 0:13:50.320 --> 0:13:53.160 we find our parents toys? I feel like that's a 0:13:53.200 --> 0:13:56.840 story that a lot of people have without meaning to 0:13:56.880 --> 0:14:02.040 come across the dildo ill long right right. The crazy 0:14:02.040 --> 0:14:04.400 thing is that could be my mom has seven kids, right, 0:14:04.440 --> 0:14:05.960 so you think that she will be sucking a lot. 0:14:06.480 --> 0:14:08.680 I literally like, I had this conversation with my husband 0:14:08.679 --> 0:14:11.600 the other day. I'm like, I have no memory of 0:14:11.640 --> 0:14:15.320 like hearing my mom fucking like finding anything. Like she 0:14:15.480 --> 0:14:17.520 was so secretive. And the other day I asked her, 0:14:17.520 --> 0:14:19.840 I'm like, how did you do it? And she's like, oh, 0:14:19.880 --> 0:14:22.360 I just waited for you guys to go to sleep. Yeah, 0:14:22.400 --> 0:14:24.120 I know, but like how the fund did? I not 0:14:24.200 --> 0:14:26.440 here because I'm the oldest, I never heard it, but 0:14:26.480 --> 0:14:28.680 I did. I never heard it. I never walked in 0:14:29.760 --> 0:14:33.200 And I'm like that, have you ever walked in around? No? 0:14:33.280 --> 0:14:35.400 But I definitely heard. My mom is a owner. She's 0:14:35.440 --> 0:14:38.880 so extra. So my mom was like the man that 0:14:38.960 --> 0:14:45.760 reship like carpet. I don't like the child floors anymore. 0:14:46.720 --> 0:14:49.400 Your kids are, how old are you kids? Well, my 0:14:49.480 --> 0:14:53.680 daughters eight and my son is too. Okay, so right 0:14:53.680 --> 0:14:56.360 now what we're going through is like they still sleep 0:14:56.360 --> 0:14:59.600 in my bed, so we're just like ye, no, judge 0:14:59.600 --> 0:15:05.560 and BILLI um. And the thing is is like now 0:15:05.600 --> 0:15:07.800 we're like teenagers and we like sneak around to funk. 0:15:07.840 --> 0:15:11.400 So we're like, okay, maybe downstairs in the liver or 0:15:11.520 --> 0:15:13.640 maybe here and meet me there. And it's just like 0:15:13.720 --> 0:15:16.120 so we kind of like cover it up. But I 0:15:16.160 --> 0:15:19.800 feel like my daughter's like kind of like oblivious to it. Stef. 0:15:20.600 --> 0:15:25.040 She's nine, she's going on nine, but she's like so 0:15:25.080 --> 0:15:27.120 now my husband's like, oh, maybe we gotta like no 0:15:27.200 --> 0:15:30.200 more like morning sex or you know, because like now 0:15:30.240 --> 0:15:32.400 she's like she'll send my son upstairs, like oh go 0:15:32.480 --> 0:15:34.440 see what they're doing. Now. Let me ask you at 0:15:34.600 --> 0:15:37.760 nine with social media, because at nine I didn't have 0:15:37.960 --> 0:15:40.440 the access to phones and TV important like not to 0:15:40.520 --> 0:15:42.640 the extent that it is now, do you feel like 0:15:42.720 --> 0:15:46.120 at nine that conversation about sex or sex toys would 0:15:46.120 --> 0:15:47.640 happen or at what age do you think that's going 0:15:47.680 --> 0:15:52.000 to happen? In this age right now? I kind of 0:15:52.000 --> 0:15:54.160 test the waters with her, like I'm very open with her, 0:15:54.360 --> 0:15:56.360 like she knows I'm adulla. She knows that babies come 0:15:56.360 --> 0:15:58.880 out of vaginas, like she knows, like you know, not 0:15:59.000 --> 0:16:09.000 just like you like, we don't story a story, she said, 0:16:09.040 --> 0:16:14.800 the story is I'm like, what's the stewardess? So now 0:16:14.840 --> 0:16:26.640 that's yo, so low. I'm coming from work. I went 0:16:26.640 --> 0:16:29.840 out last night. I had company. So then we was 0:16:29.880 --> 0:16:32.840 cuddling all night. We was cuddling this morning, like what 0:16:33.360 --> 0:16:36.760 I'm sor I was just drinking. We drink a lot. 0:16:36.960 --> 0:16:40.960 Dumb so um k Camp and Genius were intown rappers, 0:16:41.080 --> 0:16:42.800 so once met them at the studio. Then we went 0:16:42.840 --> 0:16:44.840 to PhD. Then we went to Dumblehouse and we went 0:16:44.880 --> 0:16:47.200 to another bar. We like bar hopped all night. Nick, 0:16:47.320 --> 0:16:48.560 I was in Brooklyn. That's how you know. I was 0:16:48.560 --> 0:16:51.400 out late. Who was your company? That's what you're not 0:16:51.440 --> 0:16:55.040 gonna be all look at my business about a friend. 0:16:55.320 --> 0:16:57.480 He was a friend and we had, you know, a 0:16:57.560 --> 0:17:01.640 nice cuddle session. So I was up late. Did you 0:17:01.680 --> 0:17:04.440 cuddle something into your mouth? Now it was only cuddling, 0:17:04.920 --> 0:17:09.280 thank you saying there's a big old belly right there. Yeah, no, 0:17:09.520 --> 0:17:12.240 that wouldn't happen with me and now I don't know, 0:17:12.280 --> 0:17:15.000 I get, I get really weird. Look, so Adam and 0:17:15.000 --> 0:17:17.119 Eve like sent us a whole bunch of like condoms. 0:17:17.560 --> 0:17:19.800 So now I have like mad options. And he was 0:17:20.080 --> 0:17:22.480 this is let me tell you the embarrassing part real quick. 0:17:22.520 --> 0:17:24.119 This is an embarrassing part of the story. And I 0:17:24.160 --> 0:17:27.639 felt like a whore. So we get to the house 0:17:27.840 --> 0:17:29.800 and I take a shower because I went to work then, 0:17:30.000 --> 0:17:31.959 like we were out everywhere in all these clubs. So 0:17:32.000 --> 0:17:34.119 I go to take a shower and I put my 0:17:34.119 --> 0:17:36.440 my winter robe on like this like furry robe that 0:17:36.520 --> 0:17:38.840 I have from Victoria's Secret. So we get in the 0:17:38.840 --> 0:17:40.960 bed and he goes to cuddle with me and my 0:17:41.080 --> 0:17:45.000 robe has pockets. There was fucking condoms in the pockets. 0:17:45.000 --> 0:17:46.880 I must have left them in there when Lawyer Bay 0:17:46.920 --> 0:17:49.240 came over like a month and a half ago, and 0:17:49.359 --> 0:17:51.359 so he's like, oh, you came to the bed ready. 0:17:51.400 --> 0:17:53.040 I said, I showed you not. I don't know what 0:17:53.119 --> 0:17:55.000 those are doing in there, and threw them across the room. 0:17:55.080 --> 0:17:57.520 But it was so embarrassing because I'm like, oh, he 0:17:57.600 --> 0:17:59.520 must think I'm a whore. There's just condoms ready in 0:17:59.560 --> 0:18:05.320 my robe. That made me feel like a horror fuck. 0:18:05.880 --> 0:18:09.200 I think the bigger issue is how fucking cheesy. I'm 0:18:09.200 --> 0:18:12.040 trying to imagine you're watching TV in your robe and 0:18:12.080 --> 0:18:15.320 suddenly you're like like flips out. So no, no, no, no no. 0:18:15.920 --> 0:18:19.520 When when Lawyer Bay came over, I like, because we 0:18:19.520 --> 0:18:22.600 were already laying in bed, so I hate the awkward 0:18:23.119 --> 0:18:24.879 You got a condom? Yeah, let me get up and 0:18:24.880 --> 0:18:27.600 go get it. Draws halfway hanging off for Dick is 0:18:27.600 --> 0:18:29.800 out already and now we got to go find a condom. 0:18:30.000 --> 0:18:32.439 So I'd normally like either put it in my pillowcase 0:18:32.880 --> 0:18:35.119 or in that case, it was in my robe, but 0:18:35.320 --> 0:18:37.639 so this was for another nick and he found it 0:18:37.640 --> 0:18:39.520 and thought I came to the bed ready for him, 0:18:39.560 --> 0:18:43.360 and I was like, no, damn, how did those get there? 0:18:46.520 --> 0:18:49.399 He was ready, bit I was like, no, we're you know, 0:18:49.440 --> 0:18:51.960 I'm trying to slide, I hope, so into every podcast 0:18:52.040 --> 0:18:54.399 here forward, I'm like making a commitment that I just 0:18:54.480 --> 0:18:57.440 get to say that. I'm talking like Kodak like so much. 0:18:57.480 --> 0:18:58.919 The white people at my job think it's like a 0:18:59.000 --> 0:19:03.320 thing I do, and I'm like the thin I'm like 0:19:04.040 --> 0:19:10.120 hilarious and like, no, that's funny, Okay, So get in it. Okay, 0:19:10.200 --> 0:19:15.080 So let's start with the basics first. What is a duela? Okay, 0:19:15.240 --> 0:19:17.800 A duela is pretty much a woman, a man. It 0:19:17.840 --> 0:19:21.119 could be there's some men duelas um and it's just 0:19:21.200 --> 0:19:24.840 a person that's there for support for a pregnant woman. 0:19:25.119 --> 0:19:28.000 There's actually so many different types of duela. Is not 0:19:28.040 --> 0:19:32.399 even just a midwife, No, it's not the same. A 0:19:32.440 --> 0:19:35.239 midwife is like actually like she catches the baby like 0:19:38.160 --> 0:19:40.800 they shoot out, Wait, you you'll be the one to 0:19:40.840 --> 0:19:45.119 hold the hand. Just so I welcome through it. Like 0:19:45.160 --> 0:19:48.040 I'm basically the one that like preps them for the midwife. 0:19:48.400 --> 0:19:51.640 So it's like I'm there for like their support while 0:19:51.680 --> 0:19:54.040 they're pregnant, you know, if they have any questions, like 0:19:54.080 --> 0:19:56.639 oh sha, what's an epidural? There's some women that have 0:19:56.720 --> 0:19:59.560 no idea, So do you do this only when they're 0:19:59.600 --> 0:20:03.439 having their babies delivered like in a house or naturally 0:20:03.720 --> 0:20:06.560 you'd be going to hospitals like GMA. Just Dan, I've 0:20:06.640 --> 0:20:10.080 only attended one. I'm home birth and I didn't I 0:20:10.119 --> 0:20:12.720 thought when I thought about I thought, I thought in 0:20:12.720 --> 0:20:15.320 your house in the bathroom. Now, okay, everything is like 0:20:15.440 --> 0:20:18.520 mostly all my page my patients, not my patients, my 0:20:18.560 --> 0:20:21.000 clients are in the hospital, where do they find you? 0:20:21.160 --> 0:20:24.520 And onist they signed me like Facebook, like I promote 0:20:24.520 --> 0:20:27.800 on my Facebook. Um, there's actually like this website that's 0:20:27.840 --> 0:20:33.720 called UM Yeah. So it's like you go there and 0:20:33.760 --> 0:20:36.080 how do you get the profile? And then they see 0:20:36.119 --> 0:20:38.359 like your qualifications and then they hit you up like 0:20:38.400 --> 0:20:42.120 hey this person, could you explain your qualifications? Well, it's 0:20:42.200 --> 0:20:47.400 on your doula apps is my page? No, you don't swep, 0:20:47.640 --> 0:20:51.720 but it's kind of like like my Space kind of thing. 0:20:52.240 --> 0:20:55.119 You have profile. Yeah, like you have your own profile, 0:20:55.200 --> 0:20:57.040 like a little picture of you and then like where 0:20:57.040 --> 0:21:00.960 you're located, top eight and basically you gotta put all that. 0:21:01.560 --> 0:21:04.720 So doctors, these are my favorite books. So these are 0:21:04.800 --> 0:21:10.120 like what I love to do, like reviews from previous clients. Um. 0:21:10.160 --> 0:21:13.399 And it's basically like what information I know over the 0:21:13.400 --> 0:21:16.560 next person, So like someone might like me because I 0:21:16.640 --> 0:21:19.800 am the same here as them. It's simple because it's 0:21:19.840 --> 0:21:23.280 like so it's like when you pick out a doctor. 0:21:23.400 --> 0:21:27.920 So think about retology as a duela. I wouldn't want 0:21:27.920 --> 0:21:30.760 to go to a white doula. Okay, that makes sense, 0:21:30.800 --> 0:21:32.399 I mean, and it's not even like a race thing. 0:21:32.400 --> 0:21:34.959 It's just something that can we what do we have 0:21:35.040 --> 0:21:37.680 in common? You know, like if a person comes in 0:21:37.720 --> 0:21:41.240 and there and and like let's say it's fully all 0:21:41.280 --> 0:21:44.119 white doctors, all white nurses, So what are we have 0:21:44.200 --> 0:21:47.560 in common? Because now you're on their team and you know, 0:21:47.840 --> 0:21:49.360 I was looking for a black dula, but I knew 0:21:49.359 --> 0:21:54.600 it was sucked up not to like get even though 0:21:54.640 --> 0:21:57.480 the thing is is like as a duela, it's like 0:21:57.520 --> 0:22:00.119 so rare to find Latinos and it's kind of her 0:22:00.160 --> 0:22:02.920 to find even black dulas because I would hire a 0:22:02.920 --> 0:22:06.120 black dula before I hire a white Dulah is black. 0:22:06.440 --> 0:22:09.240 It sounds like some Africa. What is actually Greek? It 0:22:09.280 --> 0:22:12.840 comes from the like the word doul and it's um 0:22:12.840 --> 0:22:18.600 it means female slave. So that's kind of basically what 0:22:18.760 --> 0:22:23.679 I want to be. So that's basically like what I 0:22:23.760 --> 0:22:25.920 am if you think about it, because like I'm your 0:22:26.520 --> 0:22:28.960