WEBVTT - “Little Goalposts” | Resolutions 0:00:00.960 --> 0:00:03.680 That I think is what happens in January for a 0:00:03.680 --> 0:00:05.800 lot of people with their new yous resolutions. I'm gonna 0:00:05.840 --> 0:00:08.200 throw everything at the wall, and then you're two weeks 0:00:08.200 --> 0:00:11.520 in and you're like, oh, I'm so tired. I hate this. 0:00:12.160 --> 0:00:16.680 I'm ordering a pizza. I love pizza. I love pizza. 0:00:17.840 --> 0:00:34.520 More Better, More Better, Hi, and welcome to More Better, 0:00:34.560 --> 0:00:36.519 a podcast where we stop pretending to have it all 0:00:36.560 --> 0:00:39.599 together and embrace the journey of becoming a little more better. 0:00:39.400 --> 0:00:42.440 Every day, or at least trying to. That's most of 0:00:42.440 --> 0:00:46.600 a merrow, and that's Stephanie Beatrice. Welcome back, Yeah, welcome back. 0:00:46.640 --> 0:00:46.800 Here. 0:00:46.840 --> 0:00:49.800 We are doing the pod. Here, we are talking to you. 0:00:50.880 --> 0:00:58.360 How are you, mel I am great for the most part. No, 0:00:58.440 --> 0:00:59.280 I'm good. I'm good. 0:00:59.320 --> 0:01:03.240 I'm working. I'm in Atlanta happy. You know, it's great 0:01:03.680 --> 0:01:07.640 all being productive. I'm like on the go. I'm always 0:01:07.680 --> 0:01:08.800 feeling good when I'm like. 0:01:09.000 --> 0:01:15.400 One on the go, like a little cartoon, Melissa, just 0:01:15.480 --> 0:01:18.240 like on a little hamster wheel. Just I don't know 0:01:18.240 --> 0:01:20.800 why I always think of a working girl when I 0:01:20.840 --> 0:01:22.679 hear on the go. On the go, I think I'm 0:01:22.720 --> 0:01:23.800 so addressed. 0:01:23.360 --> 0:01:27.080 In like an eighties business a pencil shirt. I've got 0:01:27.160 --> 0:01:31.480 a clipboard. Yeah, white tennis on noise. Got my white 0:01:31.520 --> 0:01:33.119 tennis noise noise. 0:01:33.319 --> 0:01:37.040 Checking things off. Okay, I like doing. I'm okay, yeah, yeah, 0:01:37.080 --> 0:01:38.880 you know I'm getting my life together a little bit. 0:01:39.080 --> 0:01:39.240 Uh. 0:01:39.920 --> 0:01:43.240 Yeah. I love a new year. I love a new year, 0:01:44.959 --> 0:01:48.400 you know. I love a I love a new Year's 0:01:48.400 --> 0:01:50.520 resolutions moment, which is like what we're going to talk 0:01:50.520 --> 0:01:53.800 about today. But like I feel like when I when 0:01:53.800 --> 0:01:55.840 I start to get my life together, I feel ready 0:01:56.080 --> 0:02:01.520 to take on new things. It's usually like when I 0:02:01.520 --> 0:02:03.880 actually give myself time to breathe, whether that's like a 0:02:03.960 --> 0:02:07.520 day or two or a couple of weeks, Like, yeah, 0:02:07.680 --> 0:02:09.400 I feel like I'm starting to Yeah. I mean like 0:02:09.480 --> 0:02:12.160 like I'm sitting in my office, which like I never do, 0:02:13.600 --> 0:02:17.480 primarily because for a long time it was my guest room. 0:02:17.560 --> 0:02:19.720 And now it's like gonna be in office and it's like, 0:02:19.760 --> 0:02:24.600 look like look behind me right there. Yeah. One of 0:02:24.639 --> 0:02:28.880 the first illustrations they ever did of Mirabelle from in Gunhal. Oh. 0:02:29.320 --> 0:02:31.480 That's sweet. And they gave it to me at Disney 0:02:31.600 --> 0:02:33.720 and I'm gonna, like I need to reframe it, but 0:02:33.760 --> 0:02:37.760 I'm gonna hang it I'm very picky about my frames. 0:02:38.000 --> 0:02:40.239 It has to be like a white or a like 0:02:40.639 --> 0:02:44.040 a gold. I'm very picky. I'm very picky about my frames. 0:02:44.120 --> 0:02:47.480 I shop even for my frames. Oh that does not 0:02:47.560 --> 0:02:50.120 surprise me. No, but you are very good at aesthetics. 0:02:50.160 --> 0:02:50.840 So thank you. 0:02:51.000 --> 0:02:53.520 Whenever I redo my kitchen, you will be involved in 0:02:53.560 --> 0:02:54.120 the process. 0:02:54.320 --> 0:02:59.640 I can't wait. I can't wait. But I love that. 0:02:59.680 --> 0:03:00.640 I like. 0:03:02.639 --> 0:03:06.000 Having I feel like this came from something and I 0:03:06.040 --> 0:03:08.440 can't remember what because I've done it for so long, 0:03:08.520 --> 0:03:11.799 but I read something a long long time ago that 0:03:12.040 --> 0:03:17.720 it's like really good energy to have your work career 0:03:18.000 --> 0:03:23.760 successes sort of displayed in a space like usually an office, 0:03:24.480 --> 0:03:27.680 to have a space that reminds you of all the 0:03:27.680 --> 0:03:31.600 great things you've done or the high points the successes, 0:03:31.680 --> 0:03:35.920 especially when you're feeling low or you're feeling uninspired. And 0:03:35.960 --> 0:03:38.880 I always try to make sure our office has that. 0:03:39.000 --> 0:03:42.440 And we just moved the boys, so their room became 0:03:42.480 --> 0:03:49.120 our new office, and we bought a new desk, which 0:03:49.200 --> 0:03:51.200 was great. It's got all these like you know, it's 0:03:51.200 --> 0:03:53.920 one of those kind of hutch sort of big desks, 0:03:54.720 --> 0:04:00.320 shelves and stuff, and we put you know, some like 0:04:00.360 --> 0:04:02.360 Awards on the very top of it, and we hung 0:04:02.400 --> 0:04:06.360 some things on the wall, and I realized, like, uh, 0:04:06.440 --> 0:04:09.320 for David that that Power when he was on Power, 0:04:09.400 --> 0:04:13.400 they gave him this really cool framed thing of his 0:04:13.600 --> 0:04:17.719 character with the name and like something else from the show, 0:04:17.800 --> 0:04:20.440 and it's it's beautiful, and we just like, for some reason, 0:04:20.480 --> 0:04:22.440 never hung it up, and I was like, what the fuck. 0:04:22.600 --> 0:04:23.640 I was like, we have to hang this up. 0:04:23.640 --> 0:04:25.200 And he's like, oh, it's so old, and I was like, 0:04:25.440 --> 0:04:26.320 it doesn't matter. 0:04:27.120 --> 0:04:29.000 You were on a great show and you did a 0:04:29.040 --> 0:04:33.400 great job. This should be on the wall. I would 0:04:33.440 --> 0:04:36.359 have all those pictures of me walking those runways in 0:04:36.400 --> 0:04:40.600 Paris framed up and down my house. Do you know what, Seth, 0:04:40.839 --> 0:04:43.599 I want to fucking do that. I'm usual fucking frames. 0:04:43.640 --> 0:04:44.560 I'm a couple of them. 0:04:44.560 --> 0:04:48.240 Gorgeous pictures of him were gorgeous incredibles from like any 0:04:48.240 --> 0:04:50.840 of your campaigns, and like, yeah, on a. 0:04:51.040 --> 0:04:55.600 Race, on a freaking you know, fashion house campaign, like 0:04:55.760 --> 0:05:01.000 walking out walking walking for them like often in the 0:05:01.040 --> 0:05:02.960 show for them, that's something that I'm going. 0:05:02.839 --> 0:05:05.600 To do the dream about and he's done it multiple times. 0:05:05.720 --> 0:05:08.719 He's got to put those up somewhere. Yeah, I'm going 0:05:08.800 --> 0:05:10.919 to do that? Is that for me? I would like 0:05:11.000 --> 0:05:12.920 get those printed on flyers and hand them to people 0:05:12.920 --> 0:05:14.680 when they walked into my house. I'd be like, here's 0:05:16.600 --> 0:05:18.839 just so you know what you're walking into. This is 0:05:18.880 --> 0:05:23.520 me for door. Yeah, yeah, no, I agree. I think 0:05:23.520 --> 0:05:26.320 it's like a good thing to have a space where, 0:05:26.440 --> 0:05:28.760 even if it's a small space, you know, like a 0:05:28.800 --> 0:05:31.120 little space where you don't hide away those things. 0:05:31.120 --> 0:05:33.520 It could be a shout out, it could be what yeah, 0:05:33.839 --> 0:05:36.039 just like little moments you're proud of, you know. 0:05:36.160 --> 0:05:37.239 Yeah, even if it's picture. 0:05:37.320 --> 0:05:39.800 It doesn't have to be professional. It can be no too. 0:05:39.800 --> 0:05:42.120 But I just think that I feel good when I 0:05:42.160 --> 0:05:44.599 go in there, you know what I mean. Like I 0:05:44.680 --> 0:05:47.679 go in there to like read scripts or study and stuff, 0:05:47.720 --> 0:05:50.320 and sometimes when I'm feeling alone, just like oh it's 0:05:50.360 --> 0:05:53.520 all gonna be fine, Like yeah, yeah, look what we've done. 0:05:53.680 --> 0:05:55.880 We've got it ditched. Yeah yeah I did. 0:05:56.080 --> 0:05:56.440 Yeah. 0:05:56.560 --> 0:05:58.120 The space is going to be that as soon as 0:05:58.120 --> 0:06:01.200 I get rid of all the clothes that I've called 0:06:01.240 --> 0:06:03.880 from my closet and give them a way to friends, 0:06:04.240 --> 0:06:06.800 which is happening today hopefully. Oh my god, I'm so 0:06:06.839 --> 0:06:07.599 mad that I'm not there. 0:06:09.880 --> 0:06:10.640 More better. 0:06:11.920 --> 0:06:13.880 It's funny that we're talking about this stuff because when 0:06:13.880 --> 0:06:17.120 this episode airs, it'll be the New Year, and our 0:06:17.360 --> 0:06:19.839 episode today is about New Year's resolutions, and we're kind 0:06:19.839 --> 0:06:23.200 of talking about stuff that we're gearing up for or 0:06:23.320 --> 0:06:27.000 like planning or getting rid of and like making way for. 0:06:27.279 --> 0:06:29.840 I think we're already sort of in that headspace, and 0:06:29.880 --> 0:06:31.880 that's kind of why we wanted to talk about it today. 0:06:32.920 --> 0:06:37.080 Yeah, what's your relationship with New Year's resolutions? 0:06:37.120 --> 0:06:39.560 Do you do them? You know, I think they used 0:06:39.600 --> 0:06:42.680 to be for many a woman in this world. I 0:06:42.720 --> 0:06:44.839 think they used to be all about, like I'm gonna 0:06:44.839 --> 0:06:47.520 lose ten pounds, you know, Like, yeah, I think they 0:06:47.560 --> 0:06:50.240 all just used to be related to wait and like, 0:06:50.400 --> 0:06:52.280 so for a really long time, I had a bad 0:06:52.320 --> 0:06:54.720 relationship with them. It was either that I was engaging 0:06:54.720 --> 0:06:56.240 in that and I was like trying to get my 0:06:56.839 --> 0:06:58.280 you know, I'm gonna get a gym membership and I'm 0:06:58.279 --> 0:06:59.680 gonna take this so many classes a week and I'm 0:06:59.680 --> 0:07:01.520 gonna do this and I'm gonna eat this, and it's 0:07:01.560 --> 0:07:04.839 like that I always set myself up for failure in 0:07:04.839 --> 0:07:09.000 that way. I think now that I'm I've kind of 0:07:09.040 --> 0:07:11.800 come to terms with myself and my body in a 0:07:11.800 --> 0:07:15.320 different way, in a happier and healthy way, healthier way. 0:07:16.040 --> 0:07:20.560 I think about them now as like, I don't I'm 0:07:20.560 --> 0:07:22.120 not the kind of person it's like I'm gonna do 0:07:22.160 --> 0:07:24.280 bes ten things in the new year. It's more like 0:07:24.320 --> 0:07:26.640 these are some stuff. These are the things that I 0:07:26.720 --> 0:07:28.560 kind of want to get at in the new year. 0:07:29.240 --> 0:07:30.920 I don't know that I need to do them all 0:07:30.960 --> 0:07:34.320 by a certain date or like this year, I'm not 0:07:34.400 --> 0:07:36.840 eating cheese, you know, like I'm not setting myself up 0:07:36.840 --> 0:07:39.240 for failure by doing something like dumb like that. You 0:07:39.280 --> 0:07:43.000 know what about you? Yeah, I think similarly. 0:07:43.080 --> 0:07:47.200 I think I definitely went through phases where similarly, I, yeah, 0:07:47.640 --> 0:07:51.200 I've had kind of toxic stuff on my resolution's list 0:07:51.360 --> 0:07:54.040 that puts so much pressure, and then yeah, setting myself 0:07:54.120 --> 0:07:58.200 up for failure. And then I went through a phase 0:07:58.280 --> 0:08:02.559 where I just kind of of made the list more 0:08:02.720 --> 0:08:05.640 about like markers. 0:08:05.200 --> 0:08:07.480 I would love to hit throughout the year, Like I 0:08:07.520 --> 0:08:08.640 remember when I used to. 0:08:10.280 --> 0:08:12.000 When I still lived in New York and I used 0:08:12.000 --> 0:08:14.360 to fly out to LA for pilot season, and so 0:08:14.560 --> 0:08:18.240 like during those few years, a lot of times on 0:08:18.320 --> 0:08:20.280 MI New Year's resolution, I would put I just want 0:08:20.280 --> 0:08:23.600 to test for something. It wasn't about booking, it wasn't 0:08:23.600 --> 0:08:25.680 about you know, I want to I want to get 0:08:25.680 --> 0:08:27.840 a few calls. I want to hopefully get some good 0:08:27.840 --> 0:08:30.240 callbacks this year, and I would love to test for 0:08:30.320 --> 0:08:31.200 one project. 0:08:31.400 --> 0:08:33.680 Can you explain to listeners that might. 0:08:35.240 --> 0:08:37.160 So this is a little bit more back in the 0:08:37.240 --> 0:08:39.840 day that the model has sort of changed. But back 0:08:39.880 --> 0:08:41.520 in the day, there used to be more of a 0:08:41.559 --> 0:08:46.480 pilot season in from like mid January to mid late March, 0:08:47.320 --> 0:08:49.319 and it's when they would you would audition. 0:08:49.080 --> 0:08:50.360 For all the pilots that they had that. 0:08:50.360 --> 0:08:54.760 Year, and you know, some years you'd be busy. 0:08:54.800 --> 0:08:57.120 Some years you audition for like two. 0:08:56.920 --> 0:09:01.600 Pilots, you know, and then uh, if you get a callback, 0:09:01.640 --> 0:09:03.280 and then after the callback, you would go to do 0:09:03.320 --> 0:09:07.000 a screen test for the network and studio and that 0:09:07.040 --> 0:09:09.840 would look different my screen for every project. 0:09:09.880 --> 0:09:11.839 My screen test for Brooklyn. 0:09:11.520 --> 0:09:14.400 Nine nine was just in a room with Dan and 0:09:14.440 --> 0:09:17.480 Mike and Andy and I think Phil and Chris. 0:09:17.720 --> 0:09:19.920 I can still see that room when I close my eye, 0:09:19.920 --> 0:09:21.160 I know. And it was a small. 0:09:20.960 --> 0:09:23.880 Room and they were just recording it to show the 0:09:23.880 --> 0:09:27.320 studio network later. I've also done a screen test where 0:09:27.320 --> 0:09:30.400 it was like in a small screening room on the 0:09:30.440 --> 0:09:34.760 lot and the whole audience was full of network executive. 0:09:34.360 --> 0:09:37.280 Nightmare, nightmare, night, hell, hell. 0:09:37.360 --> 0:09:40.679 And you had to stand there by yourself in front 0:09:40.720 --> 0:09:43.240 of them, and the reader was sitting in the front 0:09:43.320 --> 0:09:45.280 row and absolutely did your audition. 0:09:45.800 --> 0:09:51.240 What, yeah, that sounds so I've run the game. You 0:09:51.400 --> 0:09:53.520 tell me that show is not is not even on 0:09:53.640 --> 0:09:55.080 air anymore. And it didn't even like. 0:09:55.160 --> 0:09:58.680 No, I don't think it lasted long either, and then yeah, 0:09:59.240 --> 0:10:02.440 such a or the pilot and sometimes it gets picked up, 0:10:02.480 --> 0:10:04.040 sometimes it doesn't, but they used to do. 0:10:04.000 --> 0:10:06.880 A lot more of them. Yeah, So the thing for 0:10:07.000 --> 0:10:09.360 you was like I want to hit this thing. I'm 0:10:09.440 --> 0:10:11.920 trying to hit this marker, just. 0:10:11.880 --> 0:10:16.120 Trying to hit this marker, you know, and sometimes it 0:10:16.120 --> 0:10:18.320 wouldn't happen, but it was like having that sort of 0:10:18.360 --> 0:10:21.120 aspirational and it wasn't I never put I want to book, 0:10:21.200 --> 0:10:22.160 I want to book a pilot. 0:10:22.200 --> 0:10:23.400 I want to book a you know. 0:10:23.880 --> 0:10:26.400 It was like I want to work this year, I 0:10:26.440 --> 0:10:29.120 want to make money as an actor hopefully this year, 0:10:29.960 --> 0:10:34.679 and I want to test for a pilot. And I 0:10:34.720 --> 0:10:37.000 had a few years where like I hit that that marker. 0:10:37.040 --> 0:10:39.200 I didn't. I didn't book the pilots, but I did test. 0:10:41.440 --> 0:10:45.000 And then it just, yeah, it became more about like 0:10:46.880 --> 0:10:49.920 sort of I guess longer term things for the year, 0:10:50.120 --> 0:10:52.440 like I love putting, Like I want to go on 0:10:52.480 --> 0:10:55.240 a great trip this year, you know, like something that's 0:10:55.320 --> 0:11:00.520 in the future. Yeah, because I find with like the 0:11:00.520 --> 0:11:03.040 the things you have to like hit the ground running 0:11:03.040 --> 0:11:05.520 in January, like you're just setting yourself up for failure, 0:11:05.559 --> 0:11:06.120 you know what I mean. 0:11:06.240 --> 0:11:06.839 If it's like I. 0:11:06.800 --> 0:11:09.960 Want to meditate every day for fifteen minutes, oh my god, 0:11:10.400 --> 0:11:12.559 you know, it's like it's too much. 0:11:12.600 --> 0:11:13.640 It's too much pressure. 0:11:14.440 --> 0:11:16.520 I just try to like or I try to make 0:11:16.559 --> 0:11:18.599 it more like so anyway, what I'm saying is the 0:11:18.640 --> 0:11:21.200 long winded way of saying, like used to hate them 0:11:21.480 --> 0:11:23.559 and hate the pressure with them. And I think when 0:11:23.600 --> 0:11:26.439 I sort of shifted to just more like what are 0:11:26.520 --> 0:11:29.920 some things I would love to have happen this year, 0:11:30.080 --> 0:11:32.679 or what are some things I'm working on now that 0:11:32.800 --> 0:11:35.760 I want to keep working on or keep like remind 0:11:35.800 --> 0:11:42.280 myself to be more better at yeare and you know, 0:11:43.360 --> 0:11:47.319 to keep the train moving feels better to me and 0:11:47.440 --> 0:11:50.720 less pressure and more like little gold posts. 0:11:50.840 --> 0:11:51.520 You know that I. 0:11:51.440 --> 0:11:56.880 Don't have to like immediately attack and make happen in January, right. 0:11:57.800 --> 0:12:03.320 More better, more better. 0:12:04.160 --> 0:12:06.520 I think the thing that has changed a lot. I mean, 0:12:06.520 --> 0:12:09.760 as we're talking about this, I'm realizing when I was younger, 0:12:09.840 --> 0:12:13.240 it was like this has to happen, and now it's 0:12:13.400 --> 0:12:17.239 much more. I don't necessarily always do New Year's resolutions 0:12:17.280 --> 0:12:20.320 because the whole year I'm kind of like manifesting like 0:12:21.080 --> 0:12:24.440 not to use a wooa word, but manifesting what I 0:12:24.600 --> 0:12:27.040 want to have happen in my life and how I 0:12:27.120 --> 0:12:30.200 want to feel when those things are happening, you know, 0:12:30.440 --> 0:12:36.240 Like yeah, and so much of of stuff for me 0:12:36.320 --> 0:12:38.440 lately is how do I want to feel when I'm 0:12:38.440 --> 0:12:38.840 doing it? 0:12:39.000 --> 0:12:39.160 Right? 0:12:39.240 --> 0:12:41.880 Like, cause you can have Let's say you are like 0:12:41.920 --> 0:12:44.200 my new Year's resolution is to like make more money. 0:12:44.240 --> 0:12:47.600 It's like, okay, cool, so but what if you're like 0:12:47.720 --> 0:12:50.120 miserable while you're making that money. I mean, obviously you 0:12:50.160 --> 0:12:52.360 can be non miserable when you spend in it, but 0:12:52.640 --> 0:12:55.640 like you know what I mean, Like or like if 0:12:55.720 --> 0:12:57.760 your new Year's resolution is like I want to lose 0:12:57.800 --> 0:13:00.840 ten pounds, like okay, well you could do that in 0:13:00.880 --> 0:13:03.000 a way that's going to make you feel connected to 0:13:03.040 --> 0:13:06.600 your body and really happy inside yourself, or you could 0:13:06.600 --> 0:13:08.800 do it in a way that's really punishing and cruel 0:13:08.920 --> 0:13:11.120 and mean. And it's like so much of it for 0:13:11.200 --> 0:13:13.200 me lately is like how do I want to feel 0:13:13.320 --> 0:13:15.760 when I'm going after this thing, or when I'm holding 0:13:15.800 --> 0:13:18.400 this thing, or when I have this thing? How do 0:13:18.440 --> 0:13:22.360 I want to feel inside myself? And that isn't just 0:13:22.640 --> 0:13:24.800 for the New Year, It's more like for all the time. 0:13:25.160 --> 0:13:26.800 And it's a good reminder for myself. I mean, like 0:13:26.840 --> 0:13:29.520 I was already like, oh about today because I feel 0:13:29.559 --> 0:13:32.320 like I have so many things to do, but actually 0:13:33.720 --> 0:13:35.640 I can change that for myself right now, like how 0:13:35.640 --> 0:13:37.840 do I want to feel? You know, Like it's kind 0:13:37.880 --> 0:13:40.040 of great. I have some friends coming over later and like, 0:13:40.720 --> 0:13:43.800 you know, not for nothing. I spent the last couple 0:13:43.840 --> 0:13:45.800 of years being kind of like lonely. I think one 0:13:45.800 --> 0:13:49.600 of my not New Year's resolutions, but resolutions was like 0:13:49.640 --> 0:13:52.240 I want to make more friends, and like I'm starting 0:13:52.280 --> 0:13:54.400 to make them and that's kind of nice, you know. 0:13:55.320 --> 0:13:57.400 Or like later I have an event to go to 0:13:57.520 --> 0:13:59.680 and it's like I get to go to this thing, 0:13:59.720 --> 0:14:01.680 and like I get to dress up and have a 0:14:01.720 --> 0:14:05.680 fun time. And one of my friends reframe it. Yeah, 0:14:06.000 --> 0:14:08.439 I think it was my sister. She was like, oh, yeah, well, 0:14:08.559 --> 0:14:11.679 you know, for a lot of people, you what, like 0:14:11.720 --> 0:14:15.360 you get dressed up on prom, you get maybe really 0:14:15.400 --> 0:14:19.560 dressed up if you get married, and like if you 0:14:19.720 --> 0:14:23.800 marry someone or have a job that is kind of 0:14:23.840 --> 0:14:26.120 a fancier job, you go to like maybe a fancy 0:14:26.160 --> 0:14:28.320 gala once a year. But like we're really lucky we 0:14:28.360 --> 0:14:29.880 get to go to like stuff where we get to 0:14:29.920 --> 0:14:34.040 dress up and like, oh it's fun. You know, it's 0:14:34.080 --> 0:14:37.600 really fun. If I frame it in that way for myself, 0:14:37.640 --> 0:14:41.040 if I if I if I don't write, then I 0:14:41.040 --> 0:14:43.480 can sort of spin out and make it become this 0:14:43.520 --> 0:14:45.840 other thing. So much of it is like how am 0:14:45.880 --> 0:14:48.640 I holding the thing? Am I holding it? Is like 0:14:48.640 --> 0:14:50.800 a punishment for myself, like this new year, I have 0:14:50.880 --> 0:14:53.080 to do this, you know, or am I getting it? 0:14:53.080 --> 0:14:55.520 It's like holding it like these are some things that 0:14:55.560 --> 0:14:57.400 I want to achieve. These are the markers that I 0:14:57.400 --> 0:14:58.240 want to hit this year. 0:14:59.240 --> 0:15:02.440 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, It's so true, and it's and 0:15:02.480 --> 0:15:05.280 it's you know even with like the you know, the 0:15:05.320 --> 0:15:10.920 working out one that you brought up like I've I've 0:15:11.200 --> 0:15:13.520 done that, I've put that on the you know, resolution, 0:15:13.640 --> 0:15:15.280 and then you get to like the second or third 0:15:15.320 --> 0:15:18.720 week of January and you're completely like destroyed and you're like, 0:15:18.720 --> 0:15:19.720 I'm never working out again. 0:15:19.760 --> 0:15:20.560 Fuck this, you know. 0:15:21.080 --> 0:15:23.200 And then there's been the years where I've been like, Okay, 0:15:23.320 --> 0:15:27.000 I want to like incorporate more movement into my life, 0:15:27.040 --> 0:15:29.200 like you. The way you frame it, I think is 0:15:29.240 --> 0:15:31.600 so important, you know. And I've had years where I 0:15:31.680 --> 0:15:33.720 then am like I'm not I'm gonna go I'm gonna 0:15:33.720 --> 0:15:35.360 show up twice a week, twice a week. 0:15:35.400 --> 0:15:35.640 That's it. 0:15:35.640 --> 0:15:37.920 I'm gonna show up twice a week. And then the 0:15:37.960 --> 0:15:41.000 goal is in February or March, maybe I go to 0:15:41.040 --> 0:15:44.360 three times a week, you know, and like setting like 0:15:44.560 --> 0:15:48.160 long term markers for myself and starting out at a 0:15:48.200 --> 0:15:52.560 reasonable pace, yeah, to like incorporate. 0:15:51.920 --> 0:15:53.520 A new habit, you know. 0:15:53.800 --> 0:15:55.600 Like I feel like one year I was even that 0:15:55.680 --> 0:15:58.400 with cooking, you know, and I was like, I'm just 0:15:58.440 --> 0:16:01.080 gonna cook one extra meal a week. I'm going to 0:16:01.160 --> 0:16:05.640 try to just add one a week for a while, yeah, 0:16:05.680 --> 0:16:08.080 and then see how it goes. And then naturally you 0:16:08.160 --> 0:16:11.840 like do a little more, you know, it's like building 0:16:12.080 --> 0:16:15.680 I think habits, and like the initial intention is great, 0:16:16.000 --> 0:16:18.960 but like you really have to feel like think about 0:16:19.000 --> 0:16:20.320 how we frame. 0:16:20.040 --> 0:16:23.000 It in our minds and how we and plan out 0:16:23.000 --> 0:16:25.600 and approach. Yeah, well and that's the thing, right, Like 0:16:25.720 --> 0:16:27.560 U do you remember I don't know if you remember 0:16:27.600 --> 0:16:31.080 this or not when you when you had your children, 0:16:31.200 --> 0:16:34.280 but I remember reading in some book they were like, listen, 0:16:34.480 --> 0:16:37.400 you're the adrenaline is gonna make you feel like you 0:16:37.480 --> 0:16:40.320 can do anything, like the three days after that baby 0:16:40.400 --> 0:16:42.960 is born, you are gonna And I was like, I 0:16:42.960 --> 0:16:45.080 don't think I'll be tired. And I woke up the 0:16:45.160 --> 0:16:47.600 day after and I was like, I'm gonna make granola. 0:16:47.800 --> 0:16:51.600 And I made granola from scratch and like cleaned the 0:16:51.680 --> 0:16:54.680 house and was like, oh my god, a post baby 0:16:54.760 --> 0:16:57.600 is gonna be amazing for me. And then I crashed 0:16:57.680 --> 0:17:01.800 like two days later, but because I was like amped 0:17:01.880 --> 0:17:04.640 up on, like I can do it all, and like, yeah, 0:17:05.000 --> 0:17:07.720 that I think is what happens in January. For a 0:17:07.720 --> 0:17:10.119 lot of people with their New York's resolutions, they don't 0:17:10.359 --> 0:17:12.119 look at it, they don't break it down in an 0:17:12.160 --> 0:17:15.359 approachable way like you said. They go like I'm gonna 0:17:15.359 --> 0:17:17.760 throw everything at the wall, and then you're two weeks 0:17:17.800 --> 0:17:21.080 in and you're like, oh, I'm so tired. I hate this. 0:17:21.720 --> 0:17:27.600 I'm ordering a pizza. Pizza. Yeah. It's that that talk, right, 0:17:27.680 --> 0:17:31.520 Like I say, I can't stick to anything. I'm the worst. Yeah, yeah, 0:17:31.560 --> 0:17:35.399 you know that's worthless talk like meaning like it doesn't. 0:17:35.560 --> 0:17:37.439 It doesn't. It's not valuable for you to talk that 0:17:37.480 --> 0:17:40.560 way to yourself. We all do it, we all do it. 0:17:40.600 --> 0:17:42.600 Maybe that should be one of my newest resolutions is 0:17:42.640 --> 0:17:44.840 to not talk to myself that way. I'm getting better 0:17:44.880 --> 0:17:49.480 at it. What was the the thing that I just 0:17:49.520 --> 0:17:51.800 told us about, It was like the two week mark. 0:17:51.960 --> 0:17:54.159 Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, second week in January. 0:17:55.320 --> 0:18:00.400 The second week in January is known as quitters Day. 0:18:00.520 --> 0:18:04.160 The second Friday in January is known as Quitter's Day, 0:18:04.240 --> 0:18:06.879 when people are most likely to throw the towel in 0:18:07.000 --> 0:18:10.480 on their resolutions. Brutal, so depressing, but also I think 0:18:10.520 --> 0:18:13.040 comforting and that like if that happens to you, you're 0:18:13.040 --> 0:18:13.560 not alone. 0:18:14.440 --> 0:18:18.639 You just need to reframe your approach. 0:18:18.800 --> 0:18:21.479 Yeah, right, Like you tried to do too much, babe, 0:18:21.640 --> 0:18:24.520 tried to too much, did too much, babe, Just back up, 0:18:24.600 --> 0:18:26.280 back it up a little bit, back back it up, 0:18:26.359 --> 0:18:28.360 back it up a little bit, back it up, take 0:18:28.359 --> 0:18:30.560 a take a rest, rest. 0:18:30.160 --> 0:18:34.400 It out, honey, relax, yes, and then baby steps, little 0:18:34.440 --> 0:18:37.800 steps patience, do you like? I think that part of 0:18:37.800 --> 0:18:41.280 that is like people share their resolutions like on the internet, 0:18:42.200 --> 0:18:44.680 oh or with people, and there they feel like they 0:18:44.720 --> 0:18:48.920 have to they have to like show up or show 0:18:49.000 --> 0:18:50.840 up and show out right, like I don't tell I 0:18:50.840 --> 0:18:52.880 don't tell people what I'm working on. I also keep 0:18:52.920 --> 0:18:56.480 my manifestations private because like same evil eye, you know. 0:18:56.480 --> 0:18:56.800 What I mean. 0:18:56.840 --> 0:18:58.800 I'm like, I don't need to be telling people unless 0:18:58.800 --> 0:18:59.760 I trust all the lesson. 0:18:59.760 --> 0:19:02.600 There's time people lie because that's a very Latin thing. 0:19:02.920 --> 0:19:06.040 It's very it's it's just like it's Latin. It's like 0:19:06.080 --> 0:19:11.800 there's many men Mediterranean culture's South American, Central America like that. 0:19:12.040 --> 0:19:15.440 I think that almost all cultures, just like you don't 0:19:15.440 --> 0:19:19.679 want people listening to you and wishing bad on the 0:19:19.680 --> 0:19:22.520 thing that you want the most right because people's thoughts 0:19:22.560 --> 0:19:26.320 are powerful, good and bad. Your own thoughts growing like 0:19:26.400 --> 0:19:28.840 bad energy at you. No, I don't need that. So, 0:19:28.960 --> 0:19:32.879 like like you know, at these Hollywood parties, sometimes people 0:19:32.920 --> 0:19:34.880 be like, what are you working on? I'm like, oh, 0:19:35.600 --> 0:19:37.879 you know, just and that. You know, like I don't 0:19:37.920 --> 0:19:40.639 tell people unless I knew are them and like them. 0:19:41.119 --> 0:19:43.480 You're so good at that. I need to be better 0:19:43.520 --> 0:19:45.240 at that. I just pretend I'm not working at it 0:19:45.280 --> 0:19:47.800 all the time. I'm just like, you know, I have 0:19:47.880 --> 0:19:50.840 this thing coming out soon. I don't know when it's coming. 0:19:51.000 --> 0:19:53.920