Speaker 1: Many mores, and then that you choose Canada banatisms all.
Speaker 2: Pass the real neighborhood from all the way.
Speaker 1: Around the world. It steptacle and maybe checked the backs,
Speaker 1: put your better believe because I haven't big news charticle,
Speaker 1: and maybe checked the backs at the stranger that the
Speaker 1: true driving me, but Dallas Baby put Dallas Banlan, thena
Speaker 1: driving me, but Dalla's baby put Dadas Bandada, and driving
Speaker 1: me but Dallas Baby put DAAs Bandela better driving me But.
Speaker 3: Guys, gals, non binary pals, Welcome to a bananimals bonusode.
Speaker 4: These little bonies are just because we want to help
Speaker 4: you get through your week and feel good about it.
Speaker 4: Have us a little extra something to look forward to,
Speaker 4: to break up the monotony that is being alive.
Speaker 3: This is a little holiday bonusode. It is, isn't it.
Speaker 3: I hope you're having a good little break, a good
Speaker 3: little break getting away. Maybe you're driving somewhere right now.
Speaker 4: Mm hmm this one. We have no idea if this
Speaker 4: is family friendly, so I would assume not. Most of
Speaker 4: the time these this is an adult podcasts for mature adults.
Speaker 4: We did get a season recap from Spotify. The podcast
Speaker 4: is growing folks. It's getting bigger. So thanks to all
Speaker 4: the Bananamals out there. But I was it was funny
Speaker 4: Kurt that our listenership, I won't say exact numbers, but
Speaker 4: I will say we got the millennials on Lockdown. Yeah,
Speaker 4: the percentage of millennials.
Speaker 3: I was like, oh, okay, this is US millennials and
Speaker 3: Gen X too.
Speaker 4: Yeah, they love us.
Speaker 3: Thank you, we appreciate it, and I love them I
Speaker 3: doing it.
Speaker 4: Yeah, it's a fun one to do. So I just
Speaker 4: got back from Phoenix, Arizona.
Speaker 3: You did, Why were you in Phoenix, Arizona.
Speaker 4: Well, I was at a dinner, a birthday party dinner
Speaker 4: about a month ago, and I was at a table
Speaker 4: with my friend and you know him, also, Adam Ray,
Speaker 4: the comedian. Ye, really nice guy, one of the nicest,
Speaker 4: funniest people in comedy. And I was sitting with me
Speaker 4: and his wife, Amanda, and he was like, dude, I'm
Speaker 4: doing a tour of Doctor Phil Live. And have you
Speaker 4: seen Adam doing this? Yeah? So Adam Ray, for those
Speaker 4: who don't know, and I'm sure almost all of you do,
Speaker 4: because if you have social media, you're aware of this.
Speaker 4: He dresses up full Doctor Phil suit, mustache, bald cap everything,
Speaker 4: and then performs a live version of you know, his
Speaker 4: version of the Doctor Phil Show. And it is so funny,
Speaker 4: it's incredible, and so I was like, where are you
Speaker 4: doing the next ones? He's like, well, I'm doing a
Speaker 4: really good one in Phoenix at the Celebrity Theater. And
Speaker 4: I've always wanted to see comedy at the Celebrity Theater.
Speaker 4: George Carlin did a special there, like it's that round
Speaker 4: theater in the round sits about three thousand people, and
Speaker 4: so I was like, well, come out. So I flew
Speaker 4: out just to hang with them, and they put me
Speaker 4: on the list. My buddy Norman got me in there,
Speaker 4: and so I had the day to myself having fun.
Speaker 4: And I'm like, what do I want to do? Because Phoenix,
Speaker 4: and you may know this, Curt Phoenix has some of
Speaker 4: the best bars in America.
Speaker 3: I did not know that.
Speaker 4: I think it's a fairly recent last ten fifteen years
Speaker 4: thing because of global warming and climate change, that it
Speaker 4: is now an insufferable hell escape for about six months
Speaker 4: a year, like in the one twenties, no water never rains.
Speaker 4: It was over one hundred degrees one hundred days in
Speaker 4: a row last year, So some wise people started making
Speaker 4: the list bars. You can imagine, and I talked about
Speaker 4: being on the train bar before, where it felt like
Speaker 4: you were on a train car. So I'm you know,
Speaker 4: I'm I'm at my hotel. It's got the south door
Speaker 4: bar space. I'm just googling best new bars, best new bars,
Speaker 4: and I saw this one called Carrie On, which is
Speaker 4: like the inside of a high end private plane. So
Speaker 4: when you're on it, you feel like you're on a plane.
Speaker 4: What the servers are just like flight attendants that have
Speaker 4: drink cars. Yeah, it seats well, it's big enough to
Speaker 4: stand up, but it is round shape like a fuselage
Speaker 4: of a plane, with plane sized windows at each table,
Speaker 4: and then all the windows have sinked monitors, high toft screens.
Speaker 4: That it's a flight from San Francisco to Mexico City.
Speaker 4: So the plane takes off. It's really cool. So I
Speaker 4: go and I see Adam's show as Doctor Phil Live
Speaker 4: and it destroys in a way that I haven't seen
Speaker 4: a comedy show destroy wal like ninety minute show, maybe
Speaker 4: more like crushingly and Adam could not be funnier at
Speaker 4: it taught a lot of fan interaction, good guess all
Speaker 4: that stuff. The best was early in the show. I
Speaker 4: got a feel for who the audience was. When he's
Speaker 4: doing some crowd work and there's a dude, a white
Speaker 4: dude in late twenties on a date. He's wearing a
Speaker 4: turtleneck and which is just a turtle neck, which is
Speaker 4: a bold choice. Yeah, yeah, some people look very If
Speaker 4: you're Idris Alba, wear that turtleneck, Yep, you look good.
Speaker 4: If you're you and me, it looks like the rest
Speaker 4: of our clothes blew away in a tornado and we're
Speaker 4: wearing long John's. This is this is all we got.
Speaker 4: It's like, hey, season screetings. So this guy's wearing a
Speaker 4: turtleneck front row and he goes where you're from, Bud
Speaker 4: and the guy goes Los Angeles, and three thousand people
Speaker 4: boo so hard, really like boo, like boo, And so
Speaker 4: then you just start laughing, and you know, doctor Phil
Speaker 4: covers and all that stuff, and it was got some
Speaker 4: laughs out of it. And I think one other time
Speaker 4: somebody mentioned southern California and it was like boo. It
Speaker 4: was incredible. So I'm like, thank god Adam wasn't trying
Speaker 4: to be funny and talk directly to me. I just
Speaker 4: like sunk lower in my seat. That's so crazy. I mean, like,
Speaker 4: you know, people hate LA, but then when you really
Speaker 4: hear it, you're like boom, all right.
Speaker 3: So it's a specific set of people who hate LA
Speaker 3: and hate California, and it's so funny to hate Californian.
Speaker 3: It's like choosing the most beautiful place in all of America.
Speaker 3: Be like, that's the that's the devil. That's the devil,
Speaker 3: and it's like we're all.
Speaker 4: Our delicious food grows. We hate these people.
Speaker 3: All our technology comes from.
Speaker 4: All the entertainment that we've defined our own personalities by.
Speaker 4: We're written by these idiots that we think are gross
Speaker 4: in California. As so, show's great hanging out backstage, Adam's like, dude,
Speaker 4: I do a meet and greet. It usually takes two hours,
Speaker 4: So why don't you just go to the after party bar?
Speaker 4: And I'm like, where is it? He goes, it's this
Speaker 4: new bar called carry On. It's an airplane. I go,
Speaker 4: are you serious? Because I couldn't get in tickets released
Speaker 4: on Mondays. This was like a Friday night show and
Speaker 4: I was on the flight Friday And he goes, yeah,
Speaker 4: I'm the voice of the pilot that says, ladies and gentlemen,
Speaker 4: welcome to blah blah blah. We'll be flying for San Francisco.
Speaker 4: The average flight time is it? So Adam Ray is
Speaker 4: the vo in of the pilot, the fake pilot on
Speaker 4: the plane bar. Okay, So the owners let him have
Speaker 4: the VIP after party there because it's a brand new
Speaker 4: bar and it is so cool.
Speaker 1: I go in.
Speaker 4: The flight attendants are these two beautiful women who stop
Speaker 4: by your table. We're all chit chatting all the comics
Speaker 4: and stuff, and then they're like, can I make you
Speaker 4: a martini, sir? And then they shake you on martini
Speaker 4: right there next to you. So table side martinis.
Speaker 3: Oh my god, that's so great.
Speaker 4: Then two people as pilots, as captains, you know, full ensemble,
Speaker 4: are serving chicken nuggets, homemade chicken nuggets with caviar on
Speaker 4: them that you Kurt, you, I've thought about you instantly.
Speaker 4: I'm like, Kurt would eat five hundred of these were
Speaker 4: so good and I hadn't eaten all day. And then
Speaker 4: so they're serving amazing food, they're making drinks and then
Speaker 4: you don't have to get up, and Adam's doing the signing,
Speaker 4: and then before I know, it's two thirty in the morning. Bar.
Speaker 4: Every other bar in the city is probably closed, but
Speaker 4: because we were so hidden away in this secret little bar,
Speaker 4: and so I'm like, all right, time to lift and
Speaker 4: get out of here. So I say my goodbyes, I
Speaker 4: hit lyft and then I get a message on my
Speaker 4: phone and I just see the thing and it says
Speaker 4: I'm your driver, brave man, and I go here we go.
Speaker 4: I'm like, of course this happens. So then the next
Speaker 4: and so I check it. I'm like, oh, I think
Speaker 4: my driver's here. And I walk outside and it just
Speaker 4: says have arrived. So notifications are I'm your driver, brave man,
Speaker 4: how arrived?
Speaker 3: Oh my god.
Speaker 4: So I'm looking for a red car and I walk outside.
Speaker 4: I say goodbye Adam, say goodbye to Amanda. And then
Speaker 4: I spot my guy and he's waving. He's out of
Speaker 4: his car. He's like two blocks away, just cruise right by.
Speaker 4: So then I so, now it's two thirty, it's two
Speaker 4: fifteen in the morning, and I am nine thousand chicken
Speaker 4: nuggets drunk, and I've had so many martinis it's unthinkable.
Speaker 4: Because they're bringing them to my chair. Yeah. So I
Speaker 4: look at the lift app it loads, and my driver's
Speaker 4: name is Brave Man. All one word.
Speaker 3: Oh oh that's his name. Oh oh, okay, I didn't
Speaker 3: know that man has arrived. Okay, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 4: Yeah, Brave Man's in a Corolla. I walk out.
Speaker 3: Every Brex is a Corolla.
Speaker 4: Great car, great car. I my first car was a
Speaker 4: champagne colored Corolla. Great.
Speaker 3: Nice Honda Civic for me.
Speaker 4: I bet they're still out there driving. That's the thing
Speaker 4: about Honda Civic. And toward Akrola, they go twenty five
Speaker 4: thirty years, no problem. Great in the snow too. And
Speaker 4: so I walked this long distance and Brave Man is
Speaker 4: laughing as I approach. I'm not I'm not stumbling drunk.
Speaker 4: I'm not doing that tripp. I'm not tripping. There's nobody
Speaker 4: else on the street downtown Phoenix, just me and Brave
Speaker 4: Man and a red crowler. And he goes, hello, sir,
Speaker 4: I'm Brave Man. I'm your driver. I go, hey, Brave Man,
Speaker 4: what's up? And he goes, I see you with a
Speaker 4: beautiful woman and I go yeah. He goes, and she's
Speaker 4: not coming back to the hotel with you, haha. And
Speaker 4: he's laughing. I go, well, did you see the guy
Speaker 4: next to him? That's the beautiful woman's husband. So he
Speaker 4: just blanked out the other guy and saw Amanda and me,
Speaker 4: even though her husband was directly next to us, and
Speaker 4: the guy I know better. So then I get in
Speaker 4: the car and as we're driving the hotel, he says,
Speaker 4: I said, Brave Man. That's a pretty cool name. He goes,
Speaker 4: it is brave. You want me to tell you how
Speaker 4: to turn off your camera? Yep? What does that mean?
Speaker 4: He goes, so you must have another woman waiting for
Speaker 4: you back at the hotel room. And I go, no,
Speaker 4: I don't. He goes, you're going home alone. I go yes,
Speaker 4: I am, and he goes, oh, man, what you need
Speaker 4: to do is you need to learn how to turn
Speaker 4: off the camera. So when your woman wants to FaceTime
Speaker 4: you in your hotel room, you can say I don't
Speaker 4: know how to turn my camera on, because she's gonna
Speaker 4: want you to show her your entire room to make
Speaker 4: sure there's not a new girl in there. And I'm
Speaker 4: starting to understand.
Speaker 3: That is how committed relationships work. Brave man. The required
Speaker 3: show me the entire room to make sure that you're
Speaker 3: got face timing me with another person in the room
Speaker 3: with you.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I'm starting to understand why his name was brave Man.
Speaker 4: And I was like, does this happen a lot? And
Speaker 4: he goes, he's like, just every time you say you
Speaker 4: get a new phone and you haven't updated yet, you
Speaker 4: don't know how to use your camera. I'm like, great,
Speaker 4: this is a great, great strategy, brave Man. So he
Speaker 4: drives me to my hotel and I oakingly say before
Speaker 4: I get out, hey, there's a bar here. You want
Speaker 4: to grab a drink. He goes, yeah, that sounds good,
Speaker 4: and I go, I think it's actually closed. And then
Speaker 4: I get out of the car and I look up.
Speaker 4: I'm like, yeah, they're shutdown. Thanks brave Man. He's like, Okay,
Speaker 4: don't remember the camera trick. I go, don't remember the
Speaker 4: camera trick. So now he's just reverse psychology and me
Speaker 4: or he's so mad that I invited him for a drink.
Speaker 4: I think Brave Man wanted me to bring him to
Speaker 4: the hotel room. But no, no, he did it. But
Speaker 4: it was so funny that, like I was like, of
Speaker 4: all the drivers, yeah, out here, I get this lunatic
Speaker 4: guy named well, he was at alutic he was the
Speaker 4: life of the party named Brave Man. And then I
Speaker 4: just was screenshotting all his messages everything the whole time
Speaker 4: because I'm like, this could go completely sideways. So Phoenix,
Speaker 4: I love you to everybody. Go say hi to owner
Speaker 4: Teddy at carry On. It's an incredible bar. And if
Speaker 4: Brave Man picks you up and you're not with a
Speaker 4: beautiful woman and you will feel like a loser for
Speaker 4: the next fifteen minutes. God, he was so funny, dude.
Speaker 3: Ah, here's one for Brave Man.
Speaker 4: Folks. Shout out to brave Man who did get me
Speaker 4: home safe and I do gave give him five dollars
Speaker 4: and a five star rating. Oh hell yeah, you want
Speaker 4: to do a hypothetical or yeah, hypothetical if we got one? Okay,
Speaker 4: I got a few actually. Oh Caroline Flannagan, the lovely
Speaker 4: and wonderful Caroline Flanagan sent Oh you know, we actually
Speaker 4: got this one from another person too, same question. If
Speaker 4: you were to partake in communion to you, what would
Speaker 4: your body of Christ food item be and what would
Speaker 4: your blood drink item be? Oh, she says, hers would
Speaker 4: be Core's light and tater tots.
Speaker 3: Great answer, great answer.
Speaker 4: I like that. So much worse light grape beer.
Speaker 3: I love that so much. Oh this is a great.
Speaker 4: So what if you were the body and the body
Speaker 4: and blood of Kurt or the body of blood of
Speaker 4: a Scottie. What would your my blood?
Speaker 3: I wear it for it to be I want my
Speaker 3: blood to be a vodka martini.
Speaker 4: See we're on a martini spin.
Speaker 3: You know what, Because I wanted to give a bit
Speaker 3: of a pop, you know I wanted And also I
Speaker 3: don't want it to be able to be faked like
Speaker 3: the wine was always faked.
Speaker 4: With juice and grape juice.
Speaker 3: Yeah. Yeah, And it's just like no, no, he wanted
Speaker 3: it to be wine, folks. He wanted to get a
Speaker 3: little bit drunk. Also, what a wild idea that we
Speaker 3: don't talk about enough.
Speaker 4: Very strange, and that you can just go onto Amazon
Speaker 4: and buy bags of eucharists whenever you want. There's just
Speaker 4: bags and bags of them. I'm going to hand them
Speaker 4: out of Halloween when you really spice the neighborhood up.
Speaker 3: But also the idea that like it was never there
Speaker 3: was never a thought in our minds as kids, or
Speaker 3: as eighteen year olds, or as twenty one year olds.
Speaker 3: Never a thought in our mind, is that like the
Speaker 3: religion that we had been raised in practiced cannibalism on
Speaker 3: like a base level. And then that was the originating
Speaker 3: idea of the of the of the religion, is that
Speaker 3: you actually ate the body and the blood of a
Speaker 3: human being, because that is what your Catholics believe, that
Speaker 3: it becomes the body, it becomes the blood when they
Speaker 3: do the little tinkly magic and the that is so
Speaker 3: crazy that it's all just based in cannibalism.
Speaker 4: Is wild.
Speaker 3: And then we judge like cannibalistic culture so crazily.
Speaker 4: And yeah, let's give cannibals a break. Are we really
Speaker 4: that different than the North Sentalese Islands or whatever? Are
Speaker 4: you really that different?
Speaker 3: So crazy? Okay, So that's gonna be my drink. What
Speaker 3: what are you feeling? Drink or food or bite?
Speaker 4: If I have a congregation, you know where I'm going.
Speaker 4: I'm bringing out a big dog ballful of ice and
Speaker 4: ice cold rumplements, and everybody's gonna be if you come
Speaker 4: to the Church of Scottie, you're gonna dog ball some rumple.
Speaker 3: You're gonna dog ball some rumple.
Speaker 4: They're also gonna be drunk within a shot and have
Speaker 4: incredibly fresh breath exactly.
Speaker 3: Oh and I think I do know my my my
Speaker 3: food item. Okay, it is a Ruffles plane ridged Ruffles
Speaker 3: have ridges plain potato chip with a dollup of full
Speaker 3: fat sour cream and a little spoonful a little spoonful
Speaker 3: of of caviar on top.
Speaker 4: God, I mean, that's why I knew you would love
Speaker 4: that nugget.
Speaker 1: It was.
Speaker 4: It was a it was a homemade chicken nugget with
Speaker 4: a dollup of sour cream and caviar on it. I like,
Speaker 4: I ate like ten because also the drunk you're getting
Speaker 4: and if they don't have peanuts on that flight, I'm
Speaker 4: gonna be eat in the caviar nugget.
Speaker 3: Yep.
Speaker 4: So that's my so specific and beautiful. I think I'll
Speaker 4: go dog bowl rumple for my blood and and uh
Speaker 4: and you know, for for my not drinking sober parishioners,
Speaker 4: I'll just have some listerine, yes, basically the same. So
Speaker 4: just a nice chilled shot of dog bowld listerine.
Speaker 3: It would be really funny that listerine is my blood.
Speaker 3: Don't drink it, wash your mouth, spit it on the ground.
Speaker 4: I once read and anybody who works in marketing or
Speaker 4: advertising or academia. I once read that the concept of
Speaker 4: bad breath was invented by Listine in advertising, like everybody halatosis?
Speaker 4: Was that true? Yeah?
Speaker 3: Yeah, the idea that that it was a medical condition
Speaker 3: called halatosis. They made that up. That's incredible, that's incredible, right,
Speaker 3: bad breath always existed because people smell bad, but.
Speaker 4: Teeth rotted out of their heads by their twenties, which
Speaker 4: is good for good for you know, fluoride in the
Speaker 4: water and stuff. And then I think my food would be. Man,
Speaker 4: I'm so tempted to say a party sub and you
Speaker 4: just pass out a little slivered everybody. But I'm gonna go.
Speaker 4: I'm gonna go just a tray of seven layer dip.
Speaker 4: I'm going rumpled seven layer dips, so everybody can take
Speaker 4: a scoop of whatever combination they want of those seven layers.
Speaker 4: I like that.
Speaker 3: I enjoy that a lot.
Speaker 4: You're going to church every week, you know you might
Speaker 4: some people put black olives on them. Get that that
Speaker 4: seven and a half layer. But you say you just
Speaker 4: want cheese and bean, I got your cup. You want
Speaker 4: sauce and guac. The choice is yours. So yeah, I'm
Speaker 4: going dog ball and rumple and seven layer dip Dealer's choice.
Speaker 3: I love that so much. But you mentioned party sub
Speaker 3: six foot party sub classic. Here's what I want to recommend.
Speaker 3: This is my six foot party sub recommendation because when
Speaker 3: you cut a foot party sub into eatable sub, yeah,
Speaker 3: it's size and it can't eat it because it's now
Speaker 3: you're holding the thinnest wedge of bread and it all
Speaker 3: just the shit just falls out. It's impossible to eat.
Speaker 3: So here's what my suggestion is. And I don't know
Speaker 3: if it's possible, but if you can cut lengthwise first,
Speaker 3: so you cut from tip to tail, cut it the
Speaker 3: whole thing in half, and then cut it and you
Speaker 3: give people larger pieces, but it's only half the bread.
Speaker 4: I understand what you're saying, and that I.
Speaker 3: Think you could hold maybe with like three fingers. Then
Speaker 3: all of a sudden you got something that you can
Speaker 3: actually eat, as opposed to it's a horrible it's a
Speaker 3: horrible situation. Look at this delightful six foot sub. You
Speaker 3: love it, you love it, you want to eat it,
Speaker 3: and you can.
Speaker 4: They are fine in Maryland. The place Santoni's Glyndon, Maryland
Speaker 4: did a circle sub. It's a party sub, but it's
Speaker 4: just a circle. What do you mean? Man? Thing is
Speaker 4: so good pizza? They know they bake their own round
Speaker 4: bread and so probably if you straighten it out would
Speaker 4: be like three or four feet and it's to your point.
Speaker 4: You can cut it into a wedge instead of those
Speaker 4: weird little triangle or rectangles that you can't hold onto. Also,
Speaker 4: you feel like you have to eat the party sub
Speaker 4: in normal times like corn on the cop which I love,
Speaker 4: you know, but you feel like you almost have to
Speaker 4: hold the sides and then eat the middle. Yeah, as
Speaker 4: if it's like a serial killer walked into the office
Speaker 4: party and was like, I understand how normal people do things.
Speaker 3: Also, why is it that of all the party food
Speaker 3: subs were the only one to be like, we're gonna
Speaker 3: make a six foot version of this, whereas like a
Speaker 3: pizza was never like you know what we're gonna do.
Speaker 3: We're gonna have an eighty inch pizza.
Speaker 2: You know, like no one.
Speaker 3: I guess there is one place in La that you
Speaker 3: can get that at, but like it's not a very
Speaker 3: common thing to just have like a giant round pizza.
Speaker 4: No, there's a place in La. So when I would
Speaker 4: throw those really big parties. Like those huge parties, I
Speaker 4: would buy like two or three four foot party subs
Speaker 4: from this place in my neighborhood, and I would keep
Speaker 4: them in the fridge until it got to be around
Speaker 4: eleven PM. Then I would just put all three of
Speaker 4: them out on my counter at once, and people would
Speaker 4: be like, what is this, and I was like, you'll see.
Speaker 4: And then somebody makes that first cut and everybody's been drinking,
Speaker 4: everybody's on drugs, everybody's having fun, and then those subs
Speaker 4: would disappear within two hours. We're talking twelve feet a
Speaker 4: sub or out the door.
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, I remember I've been recently doing. I used
Speaker 3: to do just multiple crave cases of White Castle at parties,
Speaker 3: just having those show up, and like midnight or something,
Speaker 3: people go ape shit for white Castle when they're drunk.
Speaker 4: There was a great night. I remember you doing this
Speaker 4: at one of the Halloween parties and you were like,
Speaker 4: I'm gonna go get one hundred white Castle sliders and
Speaker 4: we were like, oh awesome, and the party was raging
Speaker 4: and it took so long for those to get back.
Speaker 4: By the time you came back, there were like nine
Speaker 4: people there and you know I was there by myself.
Speaker 4: It was you, me and you know, the regular crew.
Speaker 4: But then there are a lot of people there that
Speaker 4: were like, we're going to hook up. I don't know
Speaker 4: if we really need to eat a bunch of oniony sliders.
Speaker 4: And I remember one time you brought them in and
Speaker 4: I could tell in your face You're like, oh my god,
Speaker 4: the party is over and now I have one hundred
Speaker 4: and I ate so many that night, just trying to
Speaker 4: help you out. I'm like, I think this is a
Speaker 4: great idea. I love the execution here. I'm riding the
Speaker 4: f train back for forty five minutes at least, so
Speaker 4: I ate like fifteen of those things just to be like,
Speaker 4: I want Kurt to see that damage was done.
Speaker 3: This what they are. Hot, They're one of the most
Speaker 3: amazing food items. I really do believe that. And cold,
Speaker 3: they are horrified. It is like entering the birth the
Speaker 3: birth area of a of a giant alien from aliens.
Speaker 3: Like it is that upset to eat a cold a
Speaker 3: cold white castle cheap.
Speaker 4: Yeah I missed that. I used to. It's like crystal
Speaker 4: in the South. It's like, you don't we don't have
Speaker 4: anything equivalent to out here. I'm trying to think if
Speaker 4: we have like sliders and bags out here, I don't
Speaker 4: think we'd the steamed ones. I don't think.
Speaker 3: So we can't get white Castle out here, can we.
Speaker 4: I've never seen anything close.
Speaker 3: Yeah, And I also for parties would do Jersey Mike's,
Speaker 3: which is delightful because Jersey Mikes has little boxes that
Speaker 3: they put. Ye do them all and then sometimes I
Speaker 3: do uh shake shack too. That's a delight Yeah, have
Speaker 3: like one hundred shake Shack Burgers show.
Speaker 4: Up and now Shakeshacks on Delta Airlines. Delta's what put what?
Speaker 4: You can now get shake Shack Burgers on Delta Airlines?
Speaker 3: Are you when did this start?
Speaker 4: Two weeks ago? We got sent it a bunch, but
Speaker 4: it's like their new thing, and I don't know if
Speaker 4: it's just for certain classes or whatever. Probably is just
Speaker 4: for business class and they're probably just like Capital rein
Speaker 4: superior again. But yes, now they have shake Shack Burgers
Speaker 4: on deltas.
Speaker 3: I'm excited.
Speaker 4: That sounds great. Here's advice from Emma Burke, who lives
Speaker 4: in LA. If you're doing advice for the bonus episode.
Speaker 4: I live in LA and have been out of work
Speaker 4: in post production, which is editing for those who don't
Speaker 4: know since April. Have you guys ever dealt with unemployment here?
Speaker 4: And how do you handle it or keep your spirits up?
Speaker 4: It's tough? Yeah, but I think em and I exchange
Speaker 4: a couple more messages and she is like working a
Speaker 4: regular job too, like to get by, And I am
Speaker 4: very pro like, just take work. All work is noble,
Speaker 4: All work is good, keep money coming in, no matter what.
Speaker 4: But when you have a dream and you're working your
Speaker 4: career job and then you're unemployed for ten months, that's
Speaker 4: really stressful.
Speaker 3: Oh, it's incredibly stressful. Yeah, and is the question for
Speaker 3: recommendations on.
Speaker 4: What to do or yeah, what to do, not like
Speaker 4: to what career to follow, but like how do stay?
Speaker 4: How to not be depressed and bummed out about being
Speaker 4: unemployed for so long?
Speaker 3: Yeah? I mean I always find like your own personal
Speaker 3: projects is what I find to be the way I've
Speaker 3: always dealt with it. And it's just like, Okay, so
Speaker 3: I'm not getting paid, no problem, Like I'm going to
Speaker 3: now just make stuff that I want to make, and
Speaker 3: usually by making stuff it leads to work.
Speaker 4: That's a good point. Yeah, that's a good point. That's
Speaker 4: like when people always talk about like if your dating
Speaker 4: apps are so stressful and all those things, but it's
Speaker 4: like then you just go into social situation you've never
Speaker 4: been in before, and like that's when the connection happens.
Speaker 4: It's like when you're zigging, you can all sudden you're zagging.
Speaker 4: And that's actually a really good point. I would say,
Speaker 4: as Kurta and I were joking about, I think in
Speaker 4: this episode earlier, like the one thing about California, LA
Speaker 4: is very expensive, but California is very beautiful, and within
Speaker 4: two hours of the city there are incredible things to do.
Speaker 4: And I would also say on the days off, when
Speaker 4: you can find ways to travel just outside of LA
Speaker 4: even if it's locker centaur or Alta Dina, just get
Speaker 4: out of your daily routine of waking up, not having
Speaker 4: the job you want, go in the same coffee shop,
Speaker 4: going all this stuff. Just switch it up a little bit.
Speaker 4: Make a day where you go, I'm going to go
Speaker 4: to Panga today and I'm going to take a twenty
Speaker 4: minute hike and then I'm going and my whole day
Speaker 4: is just doing something I've never seen and never done before.
Speaker 4: And the good thing about California is there is stuff
Speaker 4: all over the place that you can go. Yeah, I've
Speaker 4: never done that. I'm gonna go check that out.
Speaker 3: Yeah. Go, if you're on the east side, go straight
Speaker 3: up the two, go right into Angelus National Forest.
Speaker 4: Yeah, that's true.
Speaker 3: Pick a random hike and it is you. Within within
Speaker 3: five minutes, you are in the most beautiful woods that
Speaker 3: you've you've seen in southern California, and you're completely alone,
Speaker 3: and it's awesome.
Speaker 4: And I'm going to give you one that I'm going
Speaker 4: to do, maybe as soon as this week. I found
Speaker 4: out in Livermore, California, which is kind of up near
Speaker 4: San Francisco. And again, I know, gas prices are expensive,
Speaker 4: so it's not you want to dump one hundred dollars
Speaker 4: a gasoline in your car and go on a long trip.
Speaker 4: But in Livermore there is something called the Centennial light Bulb.
Speaker 4: Do you know what that is? Kurt No, I did
Speaker 4: not know what it was either. It's it is the
Speaker 4: longest burning light bulb in America. It was first lit
Speaker 4: in nineteen oh one and it has been burning now
Speaker 4: for so it's only it got turned off a couple times,
Speaker 4: but now it's one hundred and twenty years of constant illumination.
Speaker 3: Wait, I mean that's just crazy. I don't know it
Speaker 3: one light bulb, it's just light.
Speaker 4: But where is it? And it it's in Livermore? At
Speaker 4: it in a room? It's it a Yeah, it's a
Speaker 4: building that's like a museum. I think it's in like
Speaker 4: a community center or something. And it's uh, okay, here
Speaker 4: we go. It's at let me click this. Uh it
Speaker 4: is at four or five five zero East Avenue in Livermore, California.
Speaker 4: And yeah, it's fire station number six. Okay, so it's
Speaker 4: in a fire station. But uh, it's one hundred and
Speaker 4: twenty three year old light bulb and it is the
Speaker 4: oldest known continuously operating light bulb. So I'm gonna road
Speaker 4: trip just to see this light bulb, Curt.
Speaker 3: Has it's never been repaired, They've never had to replace
Speaker 3: a filament on it or no, that's the whole thing. No,
Speaker 3: I mean, like, did they turn it on in nineteen
Speaker 3: oh one and be like in one hundred years this
Speaker 3: is gonna be awesome or was it just on for
Speaker 3: like somebody forgot? Like I want to know the story.
Speaker 3: You go, you find it, give me the stort.
Speaker 4: I'm going to report back. I'm going to be a
Speaker 4: bananama in the wild. And if any other ban animals
Speaker 4: are in californ Bornia, Nevada, Oregon, wherever, and you want
Speaker 4: to do a dumb, silly bananas road trip, check out
Speaker 4: the centennial light bulb in the wonderful town of Livermore, California.
Speaker 4: Shout out to my buddy Franco Austin Wasson. You got
Speaker 4: one or you want me to do another one.
Speaker 3: I want to have the hypothetical hypothetical.
Speaker 1: M h.
Speaker 4: M hmmm. We did get quite a few of those.
Speaker 4: Let me find a good one for us here. Let
Speaker 4: me do another, Let me do it. Would you rather
Speaker 4: like hunt for hypotheticals? Would you rather have to shake
Speaker 4: hands with yourself? Oh? This was from the debonair Elliott Joyce.
Speaker 4: Would you rather have to shake hands with yourself every
Speaker 4: time you met someone? Or you have to offer your
Speaker 4: foot to them as your handshake? So yeah, you'd have
Speaker 4: to shake your own hand when you're meeting somebody, or
Speaker 4: when you meet somebody you have to offer your foot
Speaker 4: instead of your hand.
Speaker 3: I think hands shake my own hand.
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, but you are comedian and you are tall,
Speaker 4: so yeah, there's a it wouldn't be that, but the
Speaker 4: shaking the hand.
Speaker 3: Shaking your own hand is quickly done and you get
Speaker 3: get it and you don't even have to address it,
Speaker 3: whereas offering your foot only it has to be a
Speaker 3: conversation every single time you gotta talk about it. Sorry,
Speaker 3: I'm in this weird. My life is cursed.
Speaker 4: Hi, I responded incorrectly years ago to a hypothetical and
Speaker 4: a podcast, and now my life is cursed. Yeah. Also
Speaker 4: there's something else, shaking your own hand that is very
Speaker 4: funny to do.
Speaker 3: Anyways, it's very funny, exactly, It's a delight. I might
Speaker 3: just start doing it.
Speaker 4: Do you think it's worse when somebody has a very
Speaker 4: soft handshake or a too hard handshake?
Speaker 1: Oh?
Speaker 3: Great, great question? Both say so much.
Speaker 4: I know, and I know it's also a little this
Speaker 4: one goes a little different with men and women and stuff,
Speaker 4: because like, I've definitely shaking hands with women who had
Speaker 4: a extremely soft handshake and I wasn't like, what's wrong
Speaker 4: with her? Right? Yeah, But if a dude comes up
Speaker 4: to me and gives me that limp fish, I'm like, Bud,
Speaker 4: what happened?
Speaker 3: I used to do it on purpose as a funny
Speaker 3: joke with a frint with like certain people where we'd
Speaker 3: be like hi, and then we would just take our
Speaker 3: hands out and and just hang them and just kind
Speaker 3: of bump them against each other, like no one would
Speaker 3: would engage anything, and then we would just like rub
Speaker 3: them together and that would I said high to each
Speaker 3: other every single time we saw each other.
Speaker 4: I like that. I think it's worse when somebody squeezes
Speaker 4: her hand too hard. I think it is such a
Speaker 4: macho bullshit thing. And there was this dude in New
Speaker 4: York and he used to like double tap handshake you
Speaker 4: like you'd handshake, then you'd pull away, and then you'd
Speaker 4: like squeeze your fingers as you pull them away a
Speaker 4: little bit. And I was in a circle of friends
Speaker 4: and we were all meeting this dude for the first time,
Speaker 4: and he did it to me. First, I was like
Speaker 4: closest to him, and then I walked, should't do it,
Speaker 4: And then like I sho My buddy and I like
Speaker 4: looked at each other like what the hell was that,
Speaker 4: And it was almost like we wanted to fight the person.
Speaker 4: It was nuts.
Speaker 3: Yeah. Yeah, sometimes I will do a strong handshake to
Speaker 3: a man who obviously is like acting aggressive or like
Speaker 3: has like some sort of shirt on that's offensive, And
Speaker 3: sometimes I will purposefully do it, just be like I
Speaker 3: don't fuck with you.
Speaker 4: Yes, yeah, I know what you mean. Yeah, I think
Speaker 4: I got all the things we do. The the urinal
Speaker 4: posturing of being a man, where if you're like too
Speaker 4: close to somebody at a urinal, it's weird. That's a
Speaker 4: that's a strange dynamic man.
Speaker 3: Also the sometimes inability that I have at urinals. It
Speaker 3: doesn't happen much anymore, but he used to happen more
Speaker 3: when I was younger. Of being unable to pee because
Speaker 3: men are near me.
Speaker 4: I've heard that before and not me.
Speaker 1: No.
Speaker 3: I would always just get there and be like, ah,
Speaker 3: there's just too many dudes around here right now.
Speaker 4: I don't know. You just have to go.
Speaker 2: Great workfellas, looking good.
Speaker 4: Hey, there's a file fire in the ice cave. Oh
Speaker 4: I just had one. Let's see. Here's one for you.
Speaker 4: Here's a hypothetical. This is from the transcendent Melissa. I
Speaker 4: believe Brussard to cut your name off, but we're gonna
Speaker 4: go with Melissa Brussard. Thank you for sending this in, Kurt.
Speaker 4: If you could come back for your next life as
Speaker 4: a celebrities dog. What celebrity would you be the dog for? Oh,
Speaker 4: and Melissa said she can't decide between Oprah's or Martha's
Speaker 4: or the Queen's cor geese rest in peace the Queen.
Speaker 3: What is the like, do I understand what's happening? Or
Speaker 3: am I a dog? Is the question?
Speaker 4: Well, you know the way dogs and humans are so connected.
Speaker 4: If you if they could speak, maybe they're all just
Speaker 4: people inside there being like I'm a person. Yeah, maybe
Speaker 4: when they're barking at you, it's just a dog being like.
Speaker 3: I know what's going on here, because if it was
Speaker 3: just me just being a dog in a dog body,
Speaker 3: is that what we're gonna go with? Or is it
Speaker 3: I'm a I'm actually a dog, Like you're to kind
Speaker 3: of have a rough concept that maybe I was something previous,
Speaker 3: but I'm just a dog.
Speaker 4: I think it's more fun to have your consciousness in
Speaker 4: a dog. Okay, it's your it's your brain and experience
Speaker 4: in but you act, behave and look like a dog.
Speaker 3: Okay, I think I know what I will say? Do
Speaker 3: you have do you have a thought? First?
Speaker 4: Well, my first thought when I first read this was
Speaker 4: to be whoever the current world champion marathon runner would
Speaker 4: be because dogs seemed to love to like run, and
Speaker 4: if you were somebody that's like, hey just runs twenty
Speaker 4: six miles and two and a half hours, like that'd
Speaker 4: be a great owner. You're just like, I'm gonna run
Speaker 4: with that person every day. Yeah, But if we're doing
Speaker 4: it more like human me, I don't want to run
Speaker 4: that much very often. Yeah, So I would say celebrity
Speaker 4: is interesting too. My favorite current living celebrity is definitely
Speaker 4: John Waters. That would be a fun household to be in,
Speaker 4: a lot of weirdos, a lot of great conversation, probably
Speaker 4: would feed you very well. So I would lean towards that.
Speaker 4: I'm trying to think of what celebrity is just the known.
Speaker 4: I mean Betty White was like known, best animal owner,
Speaker 4: just loved him to death. Hmmm hm.
Speaker 1: You know.
Speaker 4: The first time I ever saw a dog on a
Speaker 4: plane was Daniel Tosh had a laptock on a flight
Speaker 4: and I didn't even know as possible, and I like
Speaker 4: looked and saw the dog and was so confused, looked
Speaker 4: up and it was Daniel Tosh and I was like,
Speaker 4: well this just keeps getting stranger and walk back to
Speaker 4: my poor person seat.
Speaker 3: What a fascinating person just.
Speaker 4: Loves his dogs apparently just absolutely loves dogs. Good for him.
Speaker 4: Who doesn't love a good dog.
Speaker 3: So my first feeling was Chelsea Handler, because Chelsea hand
Speaker 3: loves dog, treats her dogs like little princes. They come
Speaker 3: to work with her, remember that, Like they're everywhere with her.
Speaker 3: They just you know, And Chelsea, you know, loves drinking,
Speaker 3: loves doing drugs, probably has a fun house, you know,
Speaker 3: so it would be fun to kind of just be
Speaker 3: a dog around there. But then I'm more thinking, like
Speaker 3: who's the most interesting person? That's right, you know, because
Speaker 3: it's because like true, I think as a dog, you're
Speaker 3: pretty happy most of the time anyway, So who's the
Speaker 3: most interesting person to.
Speaker 1: Be with?
Speaker 4: I know that's the thing about dogs. They're always just
Speaker 4: having a ball. Yeah, what they really are so fun?
Speaker 3: I would say Banksy's dog.
Speaker 4: If if you could go we're cooking there we go.
Speaker 3: If Banksy took his dog on on like when he
Speaker 3: puts stuff.
Speaker 4: Up, Yeah, Banksy's dog would be good. I was wondering
Speaker 4: if you're gonna do like a Laird Hamilton or some
Speaker 4: like Kelly Slater, like some surfer where you're like, I
Speaker 4: just go to the beach.
Speaker 3: I ever watched an interview with surfers. They are the
Speaker 3: fucking dumbest people on the planet. It is they're so happy,
Speaker 3: but they are so and they're also just like, I
Speaker 3: don't know, I gotta go. Like, especially big wave surfers
Speaker 3: like Lard Hamilton is kind of interesting a little bit. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 3: but like when you watch the people who are just
Speaker 3: like I don't know. Every day I might die that
Speaker 3: I do this and my family would be ruined. But
Speaker 3: I just love to feel that adrenaline. It's just like
Speaker 3: go drink or something like you're gonna kill your big
Speaker 3: wave surfing to me is not I don't love big
Speaker 3: wave surfing.
Speaker 4: The I went to the Surf Awards once because they
Speaker 4: were at a hotel. We were shooting, and it was
Speaker 4: so eye opening that like the presenters or other surfers,
Speaker 4: so they would be like best wave of the year
Speaker 4: or whatever, like hot tallest wave, like whatever they were,
Speaker 4: like they would barely be able to read the thing
Speaker 4: that they were like the prompt and.
Speaker 3: Your sense of humor is always just smacking another man
Speaker 3: in the testicles, do you know what I mean? Like
Speaker 3: that's like the level of humor that's happening.
Speaker 4: And then when they would win every speech, they would
Speaker 4: start sentences and not finish them, but then they would
Speaker 4: all just evolve into you were there, and you were
Speaker 4: and then recognizing people. So it would be like Kurt
Speaker 4: brown Oller wins biggest wave ride of.
Speaker 2: The year, and then you'd be like, oh, what it was,
Speaker 2: you were there? You know what I'm talking about.
Speaker 4: And then I was like, they're not saying anything. They're
Speaker 4: just nervously pointing at people and saying you were there
Speaker 4: or like it was. And I'm like John, John Florence
Speaker 4: won one and he goes up there and he's talking
Speaker 4: about pipeline or something, and I was like, what is
Speaker 4: he even because he's like it was you and You're
Speaker 4: like these But then maybe dogs love that, so who knows,
Speaker 4: maybe maybe dog want Yeah, I mean, maybe those are
Speaker 4: Maybe it's the reverse. Maybe this is the reverse hyppathetical
Speaker 4: where dogs got to turn into people and they turned
Speaker 4: into surfers when given the choice, here's.
Speaker 3: Something you're doing, John Waters.
Speaker 4: I think so. Also, I have a feeling he watches
Speaker 4: great weird movies all the time and I can just
Speaker 4: cozy up on the corner of that couch and watch
Speaker 4: weird movies with John Waters. That seems fun.
Speaker 3: That's one last one.
Speaker 4: Here's a fun one scenario advice. This is from the
Speaker 4: fant task to Courtney Courtney something with an scch Sorry, Courtney,
Speaker 4: I screenshot at it. You'll know who you are. I'm
Speaker 4: twenty nine years old and I got semi drunk tonight
Speaker 4: on wine at Applebee's. Great start, Great start, fun person,
Speaker 4: Courtney rules interested, But I'm going dress shopping two hours
Speaker 4: away from home tomorrow, Cleveland to Columbus, Ohio, and my
Speaker 4: mom is sleeping over because we have to leave at
Speaker 4: seventy m I want to go to the bar at
Speaker 4: the end of my street. Me and my fiance are regulars.
Speaker 4: Fiance is asleep, but I'm scared my mom will get
Speaker 4: mad at me. What would the banana boys do? How
Speaker 4: would you sneak out of the house with your mom
Speaker 4: waiting in the wings, your fiance already asleep, You're already
Speaker 4: wine drunk from Applebee's.
Speaker 3: Oh oh, there's a bar at the it's happening right
Speaker 3: now kind of question. This is the first type of advice,
Speaker 3: which is very very present, moment, very specific. Once they
Speaker 3: get it, it will be way past this moment.
Speaker 4: I love it.
Speaker 3: I'm gonna set a sound machine outside the mom's door,
Speaker 3: loud sound machine going, even if it's on your phone
Speaker 3: or on like a computer, and then you can do
Speaker 3: whatever the fuck you want, because that's going to cover
Speaker 3: up all your coming and comings and goings.
Speaker 4: I think you just treat it all like a challenge.
Speaker 4: I think you start a timer on your phone, and
Speaker 4: you see how slowly you can creep out of your house.
Speaker 4: You see how quietly you can open unlock the door.
Speaker 4: You basically replay all of us in high school sneaking
Speaker 4: back into our houses, but you do it as a
Speaker 4: grown woman.
Speaker 3: And oh that's another option as well. Yeah, to just
Speaker 3: say I'm a grown adult and I'm allowed to go
Speaker 3: to the bar whenever i want, because that's what being
Speaker 3: an adult is. And you write that out of a
Speaker 3: piece of paper and put it on the and then
Speaker 3: you go to the bar.
Speaker 4: You oh, in your house and you find an item
Speaker 4: that you know your mom always thought was great and loved,
Speaker 4: and you wrap it in wrapping paper and you slip
Speaker 4: it in your purse. And when you come back, if
Speaker 4: she's mad at me, you go. But I was out
Speaker 4: getting you this, and then you give it to and
Speaker 4: say night mom, and go to sleep and let her
Speaker 4: deal with the guilt of second guessing your heart and
Speaker 4: your soul and your commitment to your mind. Here, Kirk,
Speaker 4: because since that one was, I'll do the real quick
Speaker 4: one that will just do a speed What do you
Speaker 4: rather from, Eric Simsick? You have the power flight, Kurt,
Speaker 4: but you can only fly with your back to the
Speaker 4: ground facing the sky. Or you have the power of
Speaker 4: super speed, but only if you're running backwards. You have
Speaker 4: to fly looking up always, or you have to run
Speaker 4: backwards always. Which one would you rather have?
Speaker 1: Oh?
Speaker 3: Man, I mean, I don't understand how you do either.
Speaker 4: You know, it's great, visual great.
Speaker 3: It's a very funny. I guess. I guess you could
Speaker 3: fly like that if you just went high enough so
Speaker 3: that you knew you weren't going to hit a building
Speaker 3: or anything. Yeah, and you just picked your direction. But
Speaker 3: then also it's like you don't it's almost impossible to
Speaker 3: figure out how to where you're gonna land.
Speaker 4: I think it's such a funny. Would you rather for
Speaker 4: exactly the reason you're talking? I would go flying back
Speaker 4: to ground?
Speaker 1: One?
Speaker 4: Flying seems great yeah two. But yeah, you don't really
Speaker 4: get the visuals of what's beneath you, but you could
Speaker 4: hold a mirror at some point and see what's beneath you.
Speaker 4: But then just the funny visual if you and the
Speaker 4: kids were in the front yard and you looked up
Speaker 4: and just saw me, hands threaded, relaxing like I'm just
Speaker 4: taking a nap, flying over I mean, funniest thing in
Speaker 4: the world. Yeah, that's say thank you.
Speaker 3: If we're going flying Eric, it's another bonusade, folks. Thank you.
Speaker 3: You can always send all of your advice or your
Speaker 3: hypotheticals or your would you rathers to our Instagram The
Speaker 3: Bananas Podcast, Thanks Gotti.
Speaker 4: Thanks Curty B. Bananas Man. Bananas is an exactly right
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Speaker 3: Our producer and engineer is Katie Levine.
Speaker 4: The catchy Bananas theme song was composed and performed by Kahon.
Speaker 3: Artwork for Bananas was designed by Travis Millard and.
Speaker 4: Our benevolent overlords are the great Karen Kilgareff and Georgia
Speaker 4: Hartstart
Speaker 3: And Lisa Maggott is our full human, not a robot
Speaker 3: intern