Speaker 1: The nick A Gliser Podcast.
Speaker 2: Glaser.
Speaker 1: Here's Nicky.
Speaker 3: Hello here, I am welcome to the show Nicky Glaser Podcast.
Speaker 3: Starting off having to respond to a text urgently. Let's
Speaker 3: at the stage, Noah's here, Shawn's here, Brian's here. I
Speaker 3: just have to tell Chris that he's talking to my
Speaker 3: money guy. And he just said, can you please let
Speaker 3: him know that you he can tell me the state
Speaker 3: of your finances. You have full permission to tell Chris
Speaker 3: anything about my money.
Speaker 1: Okay, I have just said that, tell him it's whatever.
Speaker 4: Whatever.
Speaker 5: Finances and couples, that's like a topic that's hard to
Speaker 5: talk about, like death and sex.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it is it, I guess, Yeah, I guess.
Speaker 2: I just don't.
Speaker 4: I don't.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, I guess it is.
Speaker 3: But I'm just like I don't care what people. I do.
Speaker 1: Just don't really have any secrets, so I don't know.
Speaker 1: It's also big, like it just shows commitment.
Speaker 5: Like I remember when Avi and I like combined our finances,
Speaker 5: you know, our bank accounts or whatever.
Speaker 3: We still have our separate ones. But how do you
Speaker 3: do that together? Like how do you determine what's separate
Speaker 3: and what's come joined.
Speaker 5: Well, we just went to the bank and opened a
Speaker 5: joint one and then every month we put the same
Speaker 5: amount of money into it to cover our expenses.
Speaker 3: So, like, what do you if you're getting your hair done?
Speaker 3: Where where do you pull that from?
Speaker 1: Oh, that's my money?
Speaker 3: Well then what if you're buying a new hair dryer
Speaker 3: for your home that you're going to mostly use?
Speaker 5: U Avi has no hair, so that's a Noah expense.
Speaker 5: But isn't that also?
Speaker 4: Okay?
Speaker 1: What if you buy a snack that only you eat.
Speaker 3: Like uts is like hot groceries, chips, yeah, combined, even
Speaker 3: even if it's a snack that you.
Speaker 5: Want, But yeah, utsuts I love those.
Speaker 1: Okay, that's interesting. Yeah, it's how do you like? How
Speaker 1: do you not like? If you?
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's it's I don't know how anyone does it.
Speaker 1: It is fucked up.
Speaker 2: It just just either put it all together or keep it.
Speaker 3: No, that's nice because then you can be like, I'm
Speaker 3: buying this for myself and you don't get to weigh
Speaker 3: in on what I spend my money on because I'm
Speaker 3: using my own thing on this.
Speaker 6: Yes, it's very it's very Destiny's child of you.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna make them that song.
Speaker 6: Yeah, I think in my head, I'm like bills, bills,
Speaker 6: bills about.
Speaker 3: Bills, yes, yes, bills that.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 6: Oh, I'm terrified at being a bugaboo. That is like
Speaker 6: my least a scrub.
Speaker 2: I don't want to scrubs.
Speaker 4: Fortunately, I know I'm a scrub.
Speaker 3: I could hang out your best friends ride.
Speaker 2: Trying to holler I don't. I have separate bank accounts
Speaker 2: with my wife, and the way we.
Speaker 1: Say, yeah, how do you do the like combining things
Speaker 1: to it.
Speaker 2: We just pay for certain bills individually, like I have
Speaker 2: Alli's cell phone on my cell phone contract or whatever,
Speaker 2: and she pays for health insurance because I'm on her
Speaker 2: health insurance. So it's like we just have like different
Speaker 2: responsibilities that we're that we take care of, okay, but
Speaker 2: we don't have a joint. I tried to get a
Speaker 2: safe deposit box at the bank the other day so
Speaker 2: we can put our important valuables in there. And I
Speaker 2: go in there and I go, can I get a
Speaker 2: safe deposit box?
Speaker 1: And they said, isn't a safety deposit box?
Speaker 2: Oh? Is it.
Speaker 1: A safe deposit box?
Speaker 2: I thought it was a safe deposit box because it's a.
Speaker 6: It's in a safe and it's like a deposit box. Yeah,
Speaker 6: what the fuck?
Speaker 1: Okay, see, go on.
Speaker 4: Don't tell you that it's no longer than nineteen thirties.
Speaker 2: Why they said, they said, But the way you said
Speaker 2: it was, He's like, we don't have those and we
Speaker 2: won't have them for a long time.
Speaker 1: Well didn't they burn? Did people lose stuff in the fire?
Speaker 3: I would be worried if, like, not only do you
Speaker 3: have to grab your valuables from your house and fire,
Speaker 3: you have to then go down to the post office.
Speaker 2: I guess it is wise to put your safe deposit
Speaker 2: box in a bank that's kind of far away from
Speaker 2: your house in case.
Speaker 3: The whole time, po box is the weirdest thing I've
Speaker 3: ever heard. I feel like I'm being I feel like
Speaker 3: this is Mandela fact. Like I've never heard anyone call
Speaker 3: it a safe deposit. It's always been safety.
Speaker 1: I think it's great.
Speaker 5: Both.
Speaker 1: Oh thank god, because both are showing up on Googles.
Speaker 3: This is.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it was the whole time. I thought it was
Speaker 2: Destiny's children.
Speaker 1: It should be Wait what they should there's three of them?
Speaker 2: Yeah, No, it doesn't make any sense.
Speaker 1: That or four.
Speaker 6: There were there were four. One really got left out,
Speaker 6: the other two only mildly got left out.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2: It feels like in every great band there's always one
Speaker 2: person who got left out early on. That happened to
Speaker 2: the Beatles. Yeah, Pete Best happened to me and uh
Speaker 2: Huba stank I was the fourth. I was the stank.
Speaker 1: Wait, so what made you?
Speaker 5: Like?
Speaker 3: What valuables do you have to go like put in
Speaker 3: this thing? I don't even understand what you would put it.
Speaker 2: Recently, my brother came to me and he said, I
Speaker 2: have your birth certificate, your actual birth certificate. And I
Speaker 2: don't know why he had it, but he had it
Speaker 2: and he mailed it to me, and I was like,
Speaker 2: I'm not going to like that is so valuable because
Speaker 2: it's your original book.
Speaker 1: Isn't because you didn't even know you it was, it existed.
Speaker 1: I have to use it without it.
Speaker 2: I hadn't use it for the mail. I forgot what
Speaker 2: I had to use it for. But there was a
Speaker 2: thing like I think it was like setting up a
Speaker 2: payment thing where they were like I had my passport,
Speaker 2: was like, so I couldn't use my passport. The only
Speaker 2: other thing is your birth certificate. Okay, psychopath still has
Speaker 2: their birth certificate.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't know where mine is we're social Security
Speaker 3: card that limp little piece of paper.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 3: Like literally every driver who gives me their card has
Speaker 3: a more sturdy like card than the Social Security card,
Speaker 3: which is made with Egyptians.
Speaker 2: And you're perforated edges that you can pull off terror.
Speaker 6: I laminated my social Security card, and like when I
Speaker 6: was like seventeen and I got scaled at trying to
Speaker 6: get a passport saying that this is illegal to laminate,
Speaker 6: I'm like.
Speaker 1: It's illegal to protect it.
Speaker 3: We want to we want you to lose this and
Speaker 3: damage it by the time you have to do anything.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 6: Here, I am just trying to sell it to like
Speaker 6: a Malaysian teenager.
Speaker 1: God, laminating was so fun.
Speaker 3: I can't believe seventeen year old Sewan laminated something.
Speaker 4: My mom had a laminator and I.
Speaker 1: Was okay, yeah, you were looking for anything.
Speaker 2: What were you doing at seventeen, Sean? What were you like?
Speaker 5: Oh?
Speaker 2: I was draken smoking? And did you when you were
Speaker 2: in high school? Did you hang out with like nerves?
Speaker 2: Did you play sports at all? What was going on?
Speaker 6: I played sports and I was in a an emo band,
Speaker 6: which I've talked about on this before. Yeah, I I
Speaker 6: played baseball and base and okay, and I truly truly
Speaker 6: just a pathetic person. But someone to someone pointed out
Speaker 6: recently that I was semi popular in high school and
Speaker 6: it just, uh, it redefined everything. I like it. It
Speaker 6: changed how I viewed myself in high school.
Speaker 3: I actually Sean ran into a woman this weekend at
Speaker 3: the Vanity Fair party who came up to me and
Speaker 3: said that she saw us both in Cabo, her and
Speaker 3: her husband. And she was the one that went up
Speaker 3: to you afterwards and was like, I went to the
Speaker 3: same high school as you, and she disclosed to me
Speaker 3: that she was like and it was really awkward because
Speaker 3: we both suffered so much trauma at that school being beat.
Speaker 3: Is that true?
Speaker 6: Oh oh no, no, I well, this was the woman
Speaker 6: who came up and she was like, I went to
Speaker 6: that high school.
Speaker 4: And then I was like, oh, what year did you graduate?
Speaker 6: And she was like nineteen eighty nine and I was
Speaker 6: like what And she looked so young?
Speaker 3: Yes, yes, I like froze when she said that, because
Speaker 3: I was like, I remember Sean telling me something about
Speaker 3: how either she looked too old or too young, and
Speaker 3: I just didn't want to say anything, so I was like, oh,
Speaker 3: that's crazy, even though I knew something. But she said that,
Speaker 3: like she was like, oh my god, and I just
Speaker 3: was like, she didn't say she was really living trauma
Speaker 3: hearing you talk. You like had a story about the
Speaker 3: school or something and in your stand up and she
Speaker 3: said that it like she was like, oh my god,
Speaker 3: we were both so traumatized by that school.
Speaker 4: Oh interesting. I was not beat at all.
Speaker 1: Do you think it went on though, Oh?
Speaker 6: Absolutely, because like my mom went to that school and
Speaker 6: she would always talk about how they would like hit
Speaker 6: the students.
Speaker 1: Oh great, and so she sent you there, Yeah.
Speaker 4: Because thanks man. Yeah. And they didn't even hit me,
Speaker 4: and I was ready for it.
Speaker 1: No, you don't seem like someone who would get hit.
Speaker 3: Speaking of getting hit, have you guys seen the Vince
Speaker 3: McMahon documentary, No, Oh, okay. I watched the first part
Speaker 3: of it last night with my parents. I went over there,
Speaker 3: and like the first episode is all just about like
Speaker 3: him kind of uh taking over the WWF from his
Speaker 3: dad and then like expanding and stealing all these territories
Speaker 3: and making it like this cultural phenomenon. And then they
Speaker 3: did this one They talked about this one part in
Speaker 3: like the late eighties.
Speaker 1: I'm guessing maybe mid eighties, where.
Speaker 3: You know, pro wrestling was like all the rage and
Speaker 3: people were starting to have this kind of discourse of.
Speaker 1: Like it's fake, is it real? Is it fake?
Speaker 3: Which, like I grew up hearing all the time that's
Speaker 3: all you talked about was that you thought any guy
Speaker 3: who liked pro wrestling was so dumb because it's obviously fake,
Speaker 3: and it's like, yeah, duh, it's like it's like a play.
Speaker 3: What's wrong with that? Like why couldn't we accept that
Speaker 3: about it?
Speaker 1: Like I don't even know.
Speaker 3: Stand, but like why did you guys do such a
Speaker 3: poor job of describing what it was?
Speaker 1: You were just like, no, it's real.
Speaker 3: Like I just you should have just been like yet
Speaker 3: it is, but so is TV that you watch, Like
Speaker 3: why did you all not have really a good defense
Speaker 3: for it when you're like, it is real.
Speaker 1: You believe it was real right when.
Speaker 2: You're six and you're seven, when you're first getting into it,
Speaker 2: you think it's real, and you slowly when you get
Speaker 2: into like harvice age. I I don't know it's quite
Speaker 2: like Sanna, but it's a little bit because you are
Speaker 2: living the lie and like you don't realize it until
Speaker 2: like somebody older than you points it out.
Speaker 4: But like also, like when I was thirteen.
Speaker 6: I thought it was real because me and my friends
Speaker 6: would do like backyard wrestling and like we were really
Speaker 6: hurting each other.
Speaker 4: Right, the same.
Speaker 2: Thing about it, yeah, is that it actually does hurt,
Speaker 2: and especially when like the ECW came out, which was
Speaker 2: another wrestling link that's still around, Like they were particularly
Speaker 2: into like actually hurting each other and making sure that
Speaker 2: like the moves were vicious and people.
Speaker 1: Think throw each other into thumbtacks and yeah, glad to
Speaker 1: cut them.
Speaker 3: Yeah, they're still getting injured, but it's still like, you know,
Speaker 3: like there are people that are you know, that do
Speaker 3: a role like you know what's his name, Jeremy Strong
Speaker 3: gets injured emotionally from portraying someone. Like it's still fake though,
Speaker 3: like I'm not saying it's it is.
Speaker 1: It is a play.
Speaker 3: It is fictional, and like, yes, things can happen where
Speaker 3: it's like you know what's his name? The Andre the Giant,
Speaker 3: like his body kind of failed him during one match
Speaker 3: and so Hulk Hogan ended up winning it, even though
Speaker 3: it was kind of pretermaned that the other guy would
Speaker 3: win because he couldn't get it back up, and Hulk
Speaker 3: was trying to tell him, like, keep falling into the
Speaker 3: rope so it can spring you back up, because once
Speaker 3: he woul fall in his back, he like couldn't get
Speaker 3: up because his body was like starting to h crumble.
Speaker 3: So there's like, I'm sure there's things on the fly
Speaker 3: that happened that are like, well that's not pre German,
Speaker 3: but it's okay that it's fake. And but there was
Speaker 3: this so anyway, in the mid eighties, there was this
Speaker 3: huge backlash of it's fake, and they were kind of
Speaker 3: covering up being like it's not, which is not. I
Speaker 3: just don't think that was a good defense. So then,
Speaker 3: did you guys remember John Stossel did a report for.
Speaker 1: ABC News or something like that.
Speaker 3: Yeah, and he went under the guise of like saying
Speaker 3: like I wanna just you know, uh see interview Hulk
Speaker 3: Hogan and like kind of cover this phenomenon that is this,
Speaker 3: you know, hulk Mania. But instead it started getting around
Speaker 3: that he was asking about like the fakeness of it,
Speaker 3: and he was saying like, I hear you guys cut
Speaker 3: your like cut yourselves with the razor blades.
Speaker 1: I just assume they use fake blood. But I guess
Speaker 1: they literally cut themselves with razor blade.
Speaker 6: There's a way, there's a place to cut over your eyebrow,
Speaker 6: like I've that, Like if you do like a little cut,
Speaker 6: it doesn't leave a mark and old gosh.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's like.
Speaker 3: Yeah, got it, got it, Like okay, but okay. So
Speaker 3: then John John Sassel's backstage interviewing someone and the guy
Speaker 3: fucking punches him two times, like he gives him tenadus
Speaker 3: in the ear, like permanent ear damage. He sued the
Speaker 3: WWF got a settlement out. You know, we don't know
Speaker 3: how much he got. And then Richard Belzer also got
Speaker 3: attacked by Whole Cogan who put him in a headlock
Speaker 3: on the show. And then when he like let him
Speaker 3: out of the headlock because he was kind of giving
Speaker 3: him a hard time him mister t and they were like, oh,
Speaker 3: well we'll show you. We put him in headlock, and
Speaker 3: he fell out of the headlock and slammed his head
Speaker 3: on the like the ground of.
Speaker 1: His studio he had like a talk show. He was
Speaker 1: bleeding from.
Speaker 3: The back of his head and he's like, yeah, that's real, real,
Speaker 3: But it was so lame that they were like, we're
Speaker 3: gonna like, fuck up these like little nerdy reporters.
Speaker 1: It was so lame, it was so gross and that.
Speaker 3: But I'm not even happy I haven't gotten to I'm like,
Speaker 3: get to the poop. I know, vis Vince McMahon like
Speaker 3: made like pooped on women or something. I'm like, let's
Speaker 3: get to that.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 6: The first episode is basically very very pro Vince McMahon, Like.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you're like kind of like this guy rules. He
Speaker 1: really knew what he was doing.
Speaker 3: He like he kind of went out and conquered the
Speaker 3: United States in terms of wrestling. He was like his
Speaker 3: dad never really loved him, didn't really believe in him,
Speaker 3: kind of sold him the company under the guys of
Speaker 3: like he'll never actually own this company. He set him
Speaker 3: up to fail. He actually succeeded. He's like kind of
Speaker 3: a you're like rooting for him and then he's gonna
Speaker 3: poop on women or something.
Speaker 1: I can't.
Speaker 3: I mean me, I'm sick o, like when are we
Speaker 3: going to poop on women? But even though I don't
Speaker 3: want that to happen? Like, do you guys get like
Speaker 3: that on these documentaries, like get to the sick.
Speaker 4: Shit, it's it's coming. They had to.
Speaker 6: They had to set up like he's not rich yet
Speaker 6: like rich god like once again, that's that's when the
Speaker 6: depravity shows up?
Speaker 1: Is it always there?
Speaker 3: Like I'm looking for it in his eyes as like
Speaker 3: a young boy where he's trying to like earn his
Speaker 3: dad's respect, Like I'm I'm trying to see like the
Speaker 3: psychopathic tendencies and I don't really see it. And then
Speaker 3: they cut to like an interview with him now and
Speaker 3: you're like, oh, it's there, Like what does does becoming
Speaker 3: a billionaire like corrupt people in this way?
Speaker 4: That isn't there before?
Speaker 6: I think like the power and control that you start
Speaker 6: to feel is just like it has to feel like
Speaker 6: you're kind of godlike where no one could like touch you.
Speaker 4: But I I wonder.
Speaker 6: Is in the first episod because I watched the whole thing,
Speaker 6: the part where he's talking about like his abusive step dad. No, okay,
Speaker 6: So I think it's always been there because there's like
Speaker 6: a line he says about his abusive stepdad going like
Speaker 6: it's a shame he died because I would have enjoyed
Speaker 6: killing him. Like it's like so insane that you're like
Speaker 6: this guy is has always.
Speaker 4: Been this way?
Speaker 3: Yeah? Yeah, Well that kind of vengeance and being beat
Speaker 3: in that way, just like not if you're never taught
Speaker 3: empathy or shown any kindness, you just like don't have
Speaker 3: a chance. I was watching like a fucking Instagram reel
Speaker 3: the other day, which is I shouldn't even say that, like,
Speaker 3: if I have any information, it's from a fucking Instagram reel,
Speaker 3: but it really does not even need to be said anymore.
Speaker 3: So I was I was living, and so I, uh,
Speaker 3: you know, came across this video of like these inmates
Speaker 3: that were doing some kind of like therapy session one day,
Speaker 3: had the thing and they all stood in a circle
Speaker 3: in the yard and then they like in the middle
Speaker 3: was this therapist being like step forward if you were
Speaker 3: raised by one parent, And then they're like all.
Speaker 1: Step forward, step forward if.
Speaker 3: You you know, witnessed animal abuse in your life, step
Speaker 3: forward if you written this abuse. And it's just like
Speaker 3: all of them and it's like they pretty much were
Speaker 3: like these people didn't have a fucking chance, Like they
Speaker 3: never were shown even an ounce of love or compassion
Speaker 3: or even example of it in any part of their life.
Speaker 3: Can you really blame them that they ended up here?
Speaker 3: And it was so sweet because there was this one
Speaker 3: guy that was like, this was the this was the
Speaker 3: literal best day of my entire life. And it was
Speaker 3: like the first time he had ever like talked about
Speaker 3: his feelings. And he's like sitting in this prison. He's
Speaker 3: like an old man withering away, and it's the best
Speaker 3: day of his life that like a compassionate woman came
Speaker 3: in and like asked him how he's feeling or like
Speaker 3: how he was raised. It's like, it's so fucked poor
Speaker 3: people were so lucky if like we did even anyone
Speaker 3: care about us at all ever once, because some people
Speaker 3: don't have it literally ever.
Speaker 2: Mm hmmm, yeah, No, it's sad. That's where where we
Speaker 2: were heading. Nature and nurture is definitely nurture is as
Speaker 2: important so is nature. But like I think you can
Speaker 2: overcome a lot of nature problems with nurture. And yeah,
Speaker 2: there are people it doesn't even have to be like
Speaker 2: an abusive parent. It can be like so little too
Speaker 2: that makes that sets you down that path and makes you,
Speaker 2: uh lose that ability to empathize and be you know,
Speaker 2: a member of society.
Speaker 4: Yeah, it never even this.
Speaker 6: I guess this is not very empathetic of me, but
Speaker 6: it never crossed my mind that people are actually going
Speaker 6: through their life without that, especially because I've dedicated my
Speaker 6: entire life to seeking out the approval of love of others. Yes,
Speaker 6: so it's like so baffling to me that somebody could
Speaker 6: make it that bar and be like, no one's ever
Speaker 6: asked me how I'm doing.
Speaker 3: No. Whenever I see like someone in public blaring their
Speaker 3: phone and listening to it full volume, I mean, there's
Speaker 3: a part of me that I think, the first part
Speaker 3: of me is just like, what a fucking asshole? How
Speaker 3: could you even be that kind of person that has
Speaker 3: no regard for anyone around you? And we all want
Speaker 3: to hear this sermon or whatever you're listening to at
Speaker 3: full volume and not even good speakers, like your phone's
Speaker 3: on some water and it sounds tinny, and you're blasting
Speaker 3: it in this common area. And then I realize, oh
Speaker 3: my god, this person never had a parent look out
Speaker 3: for them in terms of their like hearing. They probably
Speaker 3: were blaring the TV and screaming while that kid was
Speaker 3: sleeping that the kid is. That person has no example
Speaker 3: in their life of someone being like, hey, let's let
Speaker 3: me like respect you, and so why would they show.
Speaker 1: It to anyone else. Yeah, and that's kind of like
Speaker 1: what it's about.
Speaker 3: Like I just I have to remember that more times
Speaker 3: than when I get like upset about how someone's acting
Speaker 3: or like, and just the idea that you know, like
Speaker 3: the idea that anyone thinks anyone like wants to be homeless,
Speaker 3: because there's this whole argument now about homeless people.
Speaker 1: It's like they don't even want help.
Speaker 3: You try to give them help and they're they you
Speaker 3: have to want it, and they don't even they want
Speaker 3: to be on the streets. It's like, no one really
Speaker 3: wants to be on the streets. They're there and they've
Speaker 3: been like hurt by this and so they don't have
Speaker 3: an option. But like, no, they didn't actually start just
Speaker 3: like they just don't. They don't love like camping so
Speaker 3: much that they were just like, oh, I want to
Speaker 3: end up here. People don't choose to do drugs and
Speaker 3: become drug addicts, like they're predisposed to do it and
Speaker 3: you would too if you had their whole life, but
Speaker 3: people just seem to think I would never do that.
Speaker 2: I think they love camping. I think that they went
Speaker 2: to ARII they spent too much money and they were like, well,
Speaker 2: I guess we have to use all this dumb.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's just you know, it's but I have to
Speaker 3: be reminded of it all the time because I constantly
Speaker 3: am getting mad at my fellow man and being like,
Speaker 3: how could you do that?
Speaker 1: Or think like that? But it's like, okay, if I was,
Speaker 1: I think like that too.
Speaker 4: But no, thank god, I'm I'm so thankful that. Uh.
Speaker 6: I guess my parents were the people who were like,
Speaker 6: never do heroin or like the DARE program did not work.
Speaker 6: The DARE program made drugs seem so fucking cool. Oh yeah,
Speaker 6: like I'll never forget scared me?
Speaker 4: Did it scare you?
Speaker 6: Oh? They played pressure by Billy Joel and they're like,
Speaker 6: this is what cocaine feels like.
Speaker 4: And I was like, oh my god, so is incredible.
Speaker 4: I can't wait to do cocaine.
Speaker 3: Oh my god, no, I I think it. I just
Speaker 3: wanted to be good though. Did you not want to
Speaker 3: be good like and not get in trouble? That's what
Speaker 3: scared me of drugs.
Speaker 6: I think I I there was definitely a shift where
Speaker 6: I started wanting to get into trouble a little bit.
Speaker 3: Because you're such a good boy, like you follow all
Speaker 3: the rules, like as someone who's worked with you, you
Speaker 3: like are like have the assignment in right on time.
Speaker 1: You're just like aimed to please and.
Speaker 3: Like of you know, in not a way that you're
Speaker 3: like scared and like oh, whatever you want, but like
Speaker 3: you seem to like to be good or.
Speaker 4: Do you like being good later for you or it
Speaker 4: was way later?
Speaker 6: Yeah, like interesting, I like poking buttons and I liked,
Speaker 6: like I really hated it.
Speaker 1: Oh, I've seen that side of you as well, by
Speaker 1: the way I have, I've seen you that.
Speaker 3: That's when did I see that come out of you
Speaker 3: where you were kind of being a little rabble rouser
Speaker 3: and I don't even know what that, but I was like, oh, Sean,
Speaker 3: there's like some time where you were kind of like
Speaker 3: being a little bit where there's just someone that, like
Speaker 3: I could tell was.
Speaker 1: Annoying you, and you're like, I'm gonna let them have it,
Speaker 1: and I've really enjoyed it.
Speaker 4: But yeah they needed to really break me down.
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, yeah, I can do it sometimes too. I'll
Speaker 3: give an example when we get back right after this.
Speaker 3: So this past week, there was a circumstance where I
Speaker 3: was getting ready for something and a producer was talking
Speaker 3: to me about a thing I was gonna do, and
Speaker 3: it was someone that I just.
Speaker 1: I had spoken with on the phone.
Speaker 3: We had a really good conversation, but then I met
Speaker 3: them in person. They were kind of like talking to
Speaker 3: me about what I was about to do, and they
Speaker 3: said that I couldn't mention this part of myself. That
Speaker 3: there's nothing wrong with mentioning it, but it's like a
Speaker 3: conflict of interest within the thing I.
Speaker 1: Was going to be on.
Speaker 3: Like let's say I was going to be in an
Speaker 3: ad for Sephora, it would have been like mentioning like
Speaker 3: one time I shopped at Alta or I was in
Speaker 3: an ad for Walmart, and I was like, I just
Speaker 3: part of it was like, let's say, like my grandfather
Speaker 3: started target, Like I wasn't allowed to say anything about
Speaker 3: my grandfather, And it's like, but that's who I am,
Speaker 3: do you know what I mean? This isn't really tracking,
Speaker 3: but it's like literally a part of who I am
Speaker 3: I couldn't mention because of a conflict of interest within
Speaker 3: this other thing. And I understood it was like way
Speaker 3: above his pay grade where this kind of was coming down,
Speaker 3: this this this mandate. But I was annoyed because it
Speaker 3: wasn't told me before, and I didn't really know who was.
Speaker 1: I knew where it was coming from, but it was
Speaker 1: just kind of getting to me too late.
Speaker 3: And I was like in the makeup chair and I
Speaker 3: just said to this really nice guy, I go, this
Speaker 3: would have been nice to know that I can't say
Speaker 3: this part of myself beforehand, because I never would do
Speaker 3: this if if I knew that, I couldn't say. And
Speaker 3: I go and then and he was just like good
Speaker 3: to know, and I was like, so just next time,
Speaker 3: like I just need to like that. I just know
Speaker 3: I wouldn't be here right now if if I would
Speaker 3: have known this ahead of time and I wasn't trying
Speaker 3: to be an asshole, it.
Speaker 2: Was just true, Like it you really want.
Speaker 3: I really did my grandfather, Earl Target I felt was
Speaker 3: an important part of my origin story anyway. So I
Speaker 3: said that, and then I instantly was like, oh, that
Speaker 3: might be kind of bitchy, and I don't want this
Speaker 3: guy to I also, I don't want this guy to
Speaker 3: feel like I'm mad at him. I go, listen, I
Speaker 3: know it's this is your This is not your your decision.
Speaker 1: You're just the person. You're just a messenger. I'm not
Speaker 1: mad at you.
Speaker 3: I'm just letting you know, like uh that I'm I'm
Speaker 3: kind of pissed off. And then he then we like
Speaker 3: joked about something else and everything was fine. And then
Speaker 3: my makeup artist after he left was like, that was
Speaker 3: so badass, Like you stood up for yourself. You let
Speaker 3: him know like exactly like I wouldn't fucking be here
Speaker 3: right now. I didn't say fucking, but she's like, you
Speaker 3: let him know you wouldn't be here, and that was
Speaker 3: so cool. And then you like totally like made him
Speaker 3: feel comfortable again by like joking and smiling and laughing
Speaker 3: about something to let him know that like it was okay.
Speaker 3: And I really appreciated that she noticed that because it
Speaker 3: wasn't insincere that I was like trying to make him
Speaker 3: feel better. I was like, and I I love your shirt,
Speaker 3: like just giving him some kind of flimsy compliment to
Speaker 3: like soothe him. I really did feel bad, like this,
Speaker 3: it's not this guy's fault, he's just doing his job,
Speaker 3: and I wanted to re establish like we're still cool man,
Speaker 3: Like we're still joking. It's still fine because I feel
Speaker 3: like I can be both, like I want to be
Speaker 3: able to let people know exactly how I feel, but
Speaker 3: I also want to be able to just instantly go
Speaker 3: back to being friends, like I like, I think sometimes
Speaker 3: people misconstrue when I like am like, hey, we're not
Speaker 3: doing that and I don't want to do that again,
Speaker 3: don't bring it up. And they're like, oh, oh my god,
Speaker 3: Nikki's mad at me. I'll never recover from this. She's
Speaker 3: gonna fire me that this is all bad, and I
Speaker 3: like I but to me, I'm just like, oh, I'm
Speaker 3: just saying like what I feel in the moment, and
Speaker 3: that's doesn't it's not going to negatively impact the rest
Speaker 3: of our lives. It's just like a thing I needed
Speaker 3: to know, right It's like, hey, by the way, we're
Speaker 3: not doing that, and I never want to make a
Speaker 3: joke like that or like whatever I'm saying.
Speaker 1: And then I feel like I.
Speaker 3: Forget sometimes that like it's other people aren't inside my
Speaker 3: brain and don't know that, like I'm fine. So I
Speaker 3: feel like I, for a book in my life, did
Speaker 3: a good job of kind of like re establishing that
Speaker 3: we're okay, like without having to say it, and he
Speaker 3: walked away feeling okay.
Speaker 6: I think that's interesting because I think it's funny that
Speaker 6: you put it back on yourself, because I do think
Speaker 6: when you do that, I think everyone is kind of
Speaker 6: not used to pure honesty, like especially in Hollywood, where
Speaker 6: everyone is like double speaking.
Speaker 4: And like really not how they feel all.
Speaker 6: Positive, which, by the way, is exactly how this person
Speaker 6: got into the situation. Is they knew that you couldn't
Speaker 6: do that, but they had to wait for the last
Speaker 6: moment because they're.
Speaker 2: Like, by the way, you can't tell any jokes. Yeah, yes, yes,
Speaker 2: kes super serious.
Speaker 3: It's just being direct. And I think that a lot
Speaker 3: of times being direct is misconstrued for being mean.
Speaker 2: Y're giving a.
Speaker 3: Boundary and saying I don't like when you do that,
Speaker 3: or I don't like when that's happening. It doesn't mean
Speaker 3: I hate you. And I think we are all a
Speaker 3: lot of people, including myself. I you know, I'm trying
Speaker 3: to consider what i'd be like on the other side
Speaker 3: of this, but like when someone gives me a boundary
Speaker 3: of like, hey, I really don't like when you do that,
Speaker 3: Like I could I can take that and make a
Speaker 3: fucking meal of it and be like, well, then I'm
Speaker 3: the worst person in the world. And if that one
Speaker 3: part of me is bad, then I must be the
Speaker 3: worst all over. And I do that all the time,
Speaker 3: so I should have more empathy about it. But I
Speaker 3: just feel like, you know, a lot of times have
Speaker 3: gotten back to me later on of like I thought
Speaker 3: you hated me because you said that one thing, and
Speaker 3: I'm like, oh, I just was like I don't want
Speaker 3: that brand of water anymore, or whatever you think.
Speaker 1: I think that's like.
Speaker 5: The stigmata that women have to carry that when you're
Speaker 5: direct and you ask for something, you're kind of labeled
Speaker 5: as like either emotional or a bitch. So I think
Speaker 5: it's harder for women to do that, whereas with men
Speaker 5: it's kind of like, oh wow, look he's taking the
Speaker 5: leadership role. He's he's a service line and the same
Speaker 5: and right. But one of the qualities that I really well,
Speaker 5: many qualities that I admire about Nikki, and I know
Speaker 5: that like you don't like to be set on this
Speaker 5: pedestal as like you know, like advancing the women's agenda,
Speaker 5: but like you're so good about setting these boundaries in
Speaker 5: like a very assertive but neutral way, and you're also
Speaker 5: really good at asking for what you want, which I
Speaker 5: think it's so challenging for women to do it because
Speaker 5: we are more inclined to be like emotional, so we
Speaker 5: just overthink it. But you don't have that, which is
Speaker 5: a really an admirable quality.
Speaker 1: It's me saying, no one drinks at this at the stable.
Speaker 3: You don't need to tell us the drink menu, like
Speaker 3: it's instead of just like sitting there and listening to
Speaker 3: it to be polite or like yes, you know when
Speaker 3: the waiter like I find my friends, like when the
Speaker 3: waiter is like, do we have any dietary restrictions, like Kirsten,
Speaker 3: if you're listening, like.
Speaker 1: Hey, so I have a like mango, there's mango and anything.
Speaker 3: It's just like I can't have mango, Like I like,
Speaker 3: if literally anything in mango, I'm gonna die.
Speaker 1: So just no mango, Like it's not it's not mad
Speaker 1: at him.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's just like we don't need to be like
Speaker 3: I'm sorry, like mang right, she's a nice person and
Speaker 3: so like I get that that goes and I can
Speaker 3: be thought of this rather harsh sometimes.
Speaker 2: Sure, the song and dance is getting harder and harder.
Speaker 2: I feel like as I get older, you you're like this.
Speaker 3: Too bright, like you're really direct and like you can
Speaker 3: come off as rude when you're just saying exactly how
Speaker 3: you feel.
Speaker 1: And I was saying this to you. I think Sean
Speaker 1: and I.
Speaker 3: Were talking about you behind your back the other day
Speaker 3: and we were like, I was being I was being comfortable.
Speaker 5: What isn't that?
Speaker 1: But and I don't know if it was behind your back.
Speaker 1: We could have been facing you.
Speaker 3: We were just in a different like I heard Canada,
Speaker 3: we could have been facing the same way, but I
Speaker 3: don't based on latitude and longitude, I don't know if
Speaker 3: we're literally behind your back. But we were talking about
Speaker 3: how like you, you're not a you will never lie,
Speaker 3: and like we even talked about the other day on
Speaker 3: the podcast of Like You, and you were like I
Speaker 3: would just tell them the truth or I would be
Speaker 3: I want to know because I'm like, why would you
Speaker 3: lie to me? And I'm like, Brian doesn't lie. He's
Speaker 3: just like always gonna shoot you straight. Like I never
Speaker 3: question where I stand with Brian. I'm never like is
Speaker 3: he mad at me about something? But I think that
Speaker 3: you probably encountered that a lot where people like think
Speaker 3: you're mad or something and you're like, what, like has
Speaker 3: that happened to you a lot.
Speaker 2: Well when I was I had to like learn how
Speaker 2: to turn this down because I remember when I was
Speaker 2: like in my twenties or maybe even a little younger,
Speaker 2: I would jokingly, as a joke, I'd pretend to be
Speaker 2: angry or.
Speaker 1: Upset about Oh I've seen that too, yeah yeah, and
Speaker 1: it's just.
Speaker 2: Always backfires where it's like, oh my god, and then
Speaker 2: it becomes a big thing, and because it's exactly what
Speaker 2: you were saying, where it's like in my head, I
Speaker 2: know that I'm all cool and everything's fine, yeah, But
Speaker 2: to them, they just see some guy yelling yeah, and
Speaker 2: that's not good. So there was I mean, there was one.
Speaker 2: There was a moment in time I think I've talked
Speaker 2: about it before in history where I realized, oh my god,
Speaker 2: I got to stop doing this. And it was during
Speaker 2: an improv warm up or whatever that was that an
Speaker 2: improv theater and there are these two people who I
Speaker 2: know who are on my improv team, who are talking
Speaker 2: and I was just walking towards them, and as a joke,
Speaker 2: I thought I was like, get out of my way,
Speaker 2: and I went right through the middle of it. Be funny, like,
Speaker 2: imagine if I actually did that. Yeah yeah, they actually
Speaker 2: did just do that.
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, you did actually do it, and there were
Speaker 3: people that would actually do that, and you might be
Speaker 3: oh no, yeah yeah, so I.
Speaker 2: Have to like, Okay, I gotta be like and I'm
Speaker 2: just kidding after I do it.
Speaker 3: Maybe, But we're talking about sometimes you will you like
Speaker 3: in a writer's room, like if something's not funny, you'll
Speaker 3: you'll just say something like you'll be like, uh yeah
Speaker 3: we could do that, or we could do something that's
Speaker 3: funny something like that, and you're not trying to even
Speaker 3: be Like sometimes I think you're trying to be comical
Speaker 3: the way you're like presenting that and trying to just
Speaker 3: kind of like you know, just bust balls a little bit.
Speaker 3: But sometimes you will literally say that like you're not
Speaker 3: even insult because everyone's allowed to not be funny sometimes,
Speaker 3: like in your world I'm imagining, like you're not funny sometimes,
Speaker 3: or like you've presented something that isn't good so you
Speaker 3: don't feel bad calling it out in someone else, whereas
Speaker 3: everyone else is like we all have to like just
Speaker 3: fake laugh at everything everyone says and go maybe.
Speaker 4: That would work, but not right now?
Speaker 2: Why possible?
Speaker 1: So quick?
Speaker 3: Yes, exactly is totally it's not time you're in the
Speaker 3: and and I think that that's what I've learned in
Speaker 3: writers rooms because I I've never been on the other
Speaker 3: side of it as a writer, and so I've never
Speaker 3: felt the rejection that I think I would feel if
Speaker 3: someone's like no.
Speaker 1: Not that one, like oh god, you know, like it would.
Speaker 3: But you guys have kind of grown like a callous
Speaker 3: to that because I know Sean, you're very sensitive to that,
Speaker 3: more so than I think even Brian would be about
Speaker 3: like having a joke or an idea rejected and now
Speaker 3: it's you have an immunity to it.
Speaker 6: At this point, there's definitely an immunity. But I also know,
Speaker 6: like I could for some reason the only place I'm
Speaker 6: empathetic is like in a writer's room, and I know
Speaker 6: exactly how people are feeling at all times. Yeah, And
Speaker 6: like that's why I really enjoy teaming up with Brian,
Speaker 6: because I feel like he has a paternal energy and
Speaker 6: I have a maternal energy.
Speaker 4: And yes, I think and I and like, especially the
Speaker 4: Globes room, I.
Speaker 6: Was like looking around being like, all right, I know
Speaker 6: who's feeling a little insecure, So I know who I
Speaker 6: could like compliment so they'll do a better job.
Speaker 3: Yes, yes, it's you gotta. I do want to like
Speaker 3: take care of people's feelings all the time. And I
Speaker 3: feel like I am aware of like if someone's you know,
Speaker 3: uncomfortable or whatever. But I I definitely have those blind
Speaker 3: spots because I'm definitely someone that people have told me
Speaker 3: is like like I'm just harsh and I'll just tell
Speaker 3: you exactly how I feel or if I don't like something.
Speaker 3: And but what I have, what I notice I do
Speaker 3: do that I really want to like stop doing. Is
Speaker 3: when I'm having an insecurity, like finding a way to
Speaker 3: blame someone else for it. I think it's like I
Speaker 3: get it from my dad of like you know, if
Speaker 3: my hair looks shitty, like I'm just like, well, you know,
Speaker 3: like I'll blame whoever did my hair last or something
Speaker 3: or like not I won't talk think you even think
Speaker 3: about my diet which is not like good for my
Speaker 3: hair or like what whatever it is like or I'll
Speaker 3: be like, well I'm not getting it if I'm not
Speaker 3: getting enough of sleep, my publicists aren't looking out for me,
Speaker 3: and they're not looking at my schedule and Chris, is
Speaker 3: it look like I have to find some one else
Speaker 3: to blame when really it's just like just let it
Speaker 3: be instead of trying to. Like when I when I'm underslept,
Speaker 3: it just becomes like a blame game, and I really
Speaker 3: hate that so much.
Speaker 6: It's so hard not to blame others, like especially because
Speaker 6: like you know, like you know, sometimes it is other
Speaker 6: people's fault. Like occasionally I'm like, I didn't, like I
Speaker 6: really half asked this, and I know that, So I'm
Speaker 6: like I could be hard on myself for that. So
Speaker 6: most of the time, I'm like totally willing to be like, no,
Speaker 6: I could really get to the bottom of this and
Speaker 6: tell you exactly who fault this one?
Speaker 4: Wow, and it was mine.
Speaker 2: I'm the exact opposite. I blame myself exclusively. Well, it's okay,
Speaker 2: I could have done better. I should have worked harder,
Speaker 2: I should have figured out that this person was going
Speaker 2: to do this, and I should have been able to
Speaker 2: what if you?
Speaker 3: So I took someone's advice once, and it's something that
Speaker 3: I deeply regret that I did. Like in a performance
Speaker 3: that I had and I took some advice and like
Speaker 3: I didn't even question it. I was just like the
Speaker 3: person was so sure of it that I was like, yeah,
Speaker 3: I'm gonna do that, and then I did it and
Speaker 3: I look back and I'm like, oh, that's the one thing.
Speaker 1: I like, why did I do it that way?
Speaker 3: But it was like the person that was giving me
Speaker 3: the advice was just so confident and so like like
Speaker 3: just sure of it that I took it, and I
Speaker 3: wanted to blame them so much of like that person
Speaker 3: like sabotaged my performance. But it's like, but bitch, you listened,
Speaker 3: so like I I had to then go, it is
Speaker 3: not that person's fault whatsoever. That person actually did believe
Speaker 3: they were confident, So I can't be mad at them
Speaker 3: for being confident. And I have to be better about
Speaker 3: knowing my gut and what works.
Speaker 1: Instead of just trust.
Speaker 3: Even with my house, I'm like you, like, I'm starting
Speaker 3: to have like a little bit of like cold feet
Speaker 3: of like do I really want this? And I'm like, well,
Speaker 3: my mom really liked it, and then Chris's mom really
Speaker 3: liked it. No, I'm like feeling like now I am
Speaker 3: like I don't even know if I like it or
Speaker 3: if I'm just liking it because of them. And it's like, well,
Speaker 3: that's still your fault, bitch, like you still need to
Speaker 3: you can't blame.
Speaker 1: The people's influence.
Speaker 2: It's the I'm not going to name names, but it's
Speaker 2: the uh the Golden Globes host prior to use problem,
Speaker 2: which is like you're blaming your writers, but ultimately you
Speaker 2: chose to tell those jokes yep, yep.
Speaker 3: And that's and I get I get there almost right
Speaker 3: away now, like where I'm like I have an knee
Speaker 3: jerk response of like, oh fuck, that's their fault, and
Speaker 3: I'm like no, It's like I okay, great, Now this
Speaker 3: is a lesson that like the next time someone is emphatic,
Speaker 3: I have that feeling of like whoa, I thought the
Speaker 3: other thing, but man, this person's really confident about this.
Speaker 3: Just give it one talk to one more person about it,
Speaker 3: one more like don't just like blindly trust, and now
Speaker 3: I'll be more perceptive of that. It's just like these
Speaker 3: lessons just keep coming in, like they you'll never end.
Speaker 4: You're You're right.
Speaker 6: I mean I succumb to this all the time. Like
Speaker 6: confidence is the most assuring thing in the entire world.
Speaker 6: If somebody is confident with me, I'm like, well, they
Speaker 6: have all of life's answers, I.
Speaker 4: Should, Yeah, I should absolutely get in the back of
Speaker 4: their van. Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker 2: The key to I think you do this too, So
Speaker 2: like the key to being blunt successfully and saying like
Speaker 2: something's bad something's good is to also be free and
Speaker 2: open with your compliments, Like if you think something like
Speaker 2: sometimes people are just negative all time, but if you
Speaker 2: think something's good, you also have to be blunt about that. Yeah,
Speaker 2: and that's how it evens out. Then you're just a
Speaker 2: good judge of things as opposed to just being a
Speaker 2: negative piece of good.
Speaker 4: I love that.
Speaker 3: Yeah, you can be blunt either way. Yeah, and just
Speaker 3: be and let yeah, just don't hold back anything.
Speaker 2: Like there were times during the Globes where I was like, no,
Speaker 2: not not effusive about a joke. But then there were
Speaker 2: other times where I was like, I think this might
Speaker 2: be the best joke that was ever written.
Speaker 3: Yes, yes, And we we would often tell people if
Speaker 3: that person was like in the bathroom while you said
Speaker 3: that about that, we would be like, when you were gone,
Speaker 3: Brian said, this was the best joke ever written, and
Speaker 3: it was. It was so exciting to relay that because.
Speaker 2: You know, there was one joke that I did say
Speaker 2: that I remember what it was. We didn't wind up
Speaker 2: using it.
Speaker 1: It was someone was saying to.
Speaker 3: The left of me who was saying it was shot
Speaker 3: Maybe it was who was sitting to the left it. No,
Speaker 3: it wasn't John Max. It was so I forget. I
Speaker 3: don't think we ended up using it, but it was something. Well,
Speaker 3: there was one moment, one moment that like I think
Speaker 3: was one of the funniest moments was when I think
Speaker 3: we'd already talked about it, but it's funny to repeat
Speaker 3: again when we were trying to get the word still
Speaker 3: out of a like we'd said still too many times
Speaker 3: in one joke, Like we had started off where it's
Speaker 3: still time to say this and and we needed to
Speaker 3: stay still again. But you don't want to say the
Speaker 3: still twice in one joke. So we were like, how
Speaker 3: do we get that still out? Like we got to
Speaker 3: take it out and we're like struggling. It's like, but
Speaker 3: I think we need it, and Noah, I think it
Speaker 3: was Noah garfiggle right it. If we really need it,
Speaker 3: we can just put it in another joke, like it
Speaker 3: was about the whole act itself, like this still just
Speaker 3: needs to be somewhere in there.
Speaker 1: That was so fucking funny.
Speaker 2: Okay, I'm remembering a little bit. I don't remember the joke,
Speaker 2: but it was a jest uk joke.
Speaker 4: Okay, it was.
Speaker 2: I think it was about Wicked and I don't remember
Speaker 2: the joke, but I remember that was the best joke
Speaker 2: ever written.
Speaker 6: Oh yes, where we were certain, we were as certain
Speaker 6: that we had cracked the case. My case, wicked wick
Speaker 6: was the Bane of December because we.
Speaker 2: Said that we were going to give out a trophy
Speaker 2: to whoever cracked the wicked joke.
Speaker 1: We didn't even what did Okay, I guess what cracked
Speaker 1: it was? My uh it was a wicked was amazing.
Speaker 1: I loved it.
Speaker 3: My boyfriend loved it. My boyfriend's boyfriend really loved it.
Speaker 3: Was that our that was our wicked like crescendo?
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, I think Conan cracked it in the Oscars.
Speaker 2: I really liked his wicked joke.
Speaker 1: What was his wicked joke?
Speaker 2: His wicked joke was you know how we all loved
Speaker 2: the Wizard of Oz. What if we took all of
Speaker 2: the supporting characters that we didn't even care about and
Speaker 2: find us story They're going to college?
Speaker 5: Yeah?
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I mean they're like, yeah, that's
Speaker 1: pretty good.
Speaker 3: There was some it was fun to watch the monologue
Speaker 3: and see like, oh, we were really close to that
Speaker 3: joke but we didn't quite get it, or like, oh,
Speaker 3: we did do that joke but we didn't we didn't
Speaker 3: keep it, or.
Speaker 2: Like, oh there was one in particular that we like
Speaker 2: that was like, oh man, we came up with that
Speaker 2: joke and we didn't use it, and then Conan.
Speaker 6: I felt that at least three or four times in
Speaker 6: the monologue where we had tried out that joke and
Speaker 6: like it we we cut it and then whatever it was, yeah,
Speaker 6: like because yeah, like uh, just through testing we like
Speaker 6: the show.
Speaker 3: Wasn't like because a lot of jokes just didn't work
Speaker 3: because of the rest of it. Like it was like
Speaker 3: there's that's not to say that if Conan did a
Speaker 3: joke that we decided not to do or some version
Speaker 3: of it, it's like it wasn't a good joke.
Speaker 1: It like didn't fit with the rest of the.
Speaker 2: Tone of what I Yeah, one of them was we
Speaker 2: seriously discussed for a long time the possibility of doing
Speaker 2: a sandworm costume that appears in an audience. Oh really
Speaker 2: did it? Yeah, No, we talked about it for a
Speaker 2: long time. I remember because I was in the park.
Speaker 4: It came out. It came up like maybe five times.
Speaker 3: They killed it with that. That was so fun, so silly, Yeah,
Speaker 3: I was. I went to my parents' house last night again.
Speaker 3: I didn't spend the night, but I went to go
Speaker 3: hang out with them again. And and yeah, I was
Speaker 3: uh talking about what it was. I just about to say,
Speaker 3: did you show you her new spear?
Speaker 4: Yeah?
Speaker 1: They did show me.
Speaker 3: There they found they found in Indian artifacts Native American artifacts.
Speaker 1: Do we say Indian anymore?
Speaker 2: Depends on what you're talking about.
Speaker 3: Well, I've heard Indian casino a ton, and I'm like,
Speaker 3: doesn't that that doesn't sound appropriate to me.
Speaker 2: I mean, I think in the commercials for Indian casinos
Speaker 2: they still say Indian.
Speaker 3: They do advertisements all over the place. In this DFW,
Speaker 3: I was walking around and said, Indian casino is some
Speaker 3: and I was like, is that okay?
Speaker 4: Is two verbose?
Speaker 2: Like, I'm sure there are some Indians who don't mind Indians,
Speaker 2: and I'm sure there's some Native Americans who don't mind
Speaker 2: Native Americans. And I think it's up to the individual
Speaker 2: to decide what they want to be called, well.
Speaker 3: My parents found Native American spears. They love looking for arrowheads.
Speaker 3: That is a big part of their relationship and just
Speaker 3: my dad loves My dad loves Native American culture and
Speaker 3: reading about He knows everything about that and so he
Speaker 3: they they're always like looking at riverbanks and for hours.
Speaker 1: And they found two the other day and I asked.
Speaker 3: My mom picked me up from the airport and she
Speaker 3: was like, your dad and I found two arrowheads And
Speaker 3: I go, I go, as years better than his, and
Speaker 3: she goes, you know it.
Speaker 2: And they really found arrowheads like recently.
Speaker 1: Yeah, they find them all the time, Like it's crazy.
Speaker 3: Yeah, my dad is hundreds Nikki, don't say that people
Speaker 3: are going to try to steal them. They're worth literally nothing.
Speaker 3: Please don't go steal my parents Missouri Indian.
Speaker 4: Artifacts safe deposit box.
Speaker 1: That's where they are, so you can't even find them
Speaker 1: in their house.
Speaker 2: Please wait. So they find these on like this in
Speaker 2: the side of a river. Yeah, like there isn't that
Speaker 2: like incredibly hard and difficult to find an.
Speaker 1: Arrowhead thinks they're no, not in my family.
Speaker 3: And they follow a guy online who like finds them
Speaker 3: every day, like multiple ones every day. They're like all
Speaker 3: over the place, like they they were, you know, before
Speaker 3: we got to this land. I think they were around
Speaker 3: for hundreds and hundreds maybe thousands of years. I don't
Speaker 3: really know anything. And so and they were cutting things
Speaker 3: all the time, you know, and that's how they ate.
Speaker 3: So there's like thousands for us. I hate to tell
Speaker 3: you a pair allegedly.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I think I think they were put there with
Speaker 4: the dinosaur bones.
Speaker 1: Right, confuse us. That's a good point.
Speaker 3: But yeah, I'm impressed by it too. It's like it's insane.
Speaker 3: But my sister, my brother in law find them all
Speaker 3: the time because they're you know, out in nature. And yeah,
Speaker 3: whenever we were kids, whenever there would be like a
Speaker 3: field we were driving pass that would be freshly tilled,
Speaker 3: we would have to like pull over and they would
Speaker 3: go like look, and you know, it's fun because like
Speaker 3: an east drag hunt, when you find one, you just
Speaker 3: like are so excited, and yeah, it's cool.
Speaker 1: It's a really cool thing.
Speaker 3: Actually, during your wedding, Brian, when I was in wherever
Speaker 3: that was, Colorado, what was the town called Grand Lake,
Speaker 3: Grand Lake, Colorado, there was a shop that had a
Speaker 3: bunch of fake arrowheads, and I bought a handful of
Speaker 3: them to trick my parents and like sweat out like
Speaker 3: whenever I would go out to their cabin and I
Speaker 3: haven't been out. And Chris thought that was the most
Speaker 3: diabolical thing he had ever heard of. You cannot do
Speaker 3: that to your hands. And I'm like, it's a joke, like,
Speaker 3: and it'll make them happy. I'll never even tell them
Speaker 3: they're not real, Like they don't get them checked, you know,
Speaker 3: like they won't know, and it'll just make them happy.
Speaker 3: I think it's actually a nice thing to do. But
Speaker 3: if they hear this podcast, then I guess.
Speaker 5: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Like there was a commercial where I fort what it
Speaker 2: was for, is like for Dura cel batteries or something
Speaker 2: where one of the daughters was really into dinosaurs. Yeah,
Speaker 2: this parents' daughter was into dinosaurs, so she got a
Speaker 2: bunch of fake bones and buried them in the backyard
Speaker 2: so that she could find the bones the bones, And no,
Speaker 2: I find that to be diabolical.
Speaker 1: I think it's diabolical. I think it is. I recently
Speaker 1: did something like that to.
Speaker 3: My nephew and I feel really really bad. Well, i'll
Speaker 3: tell you when we go break. I already told this
Speaker 3: story in the podcast but my we we made it
Speaker 3: seem like my nephew broke a world record for sitting
Speaker 3: on a ball.
Speaker 2: On what happened? Wait? Was there a fallout?
Speaker 3: Yeah, he like bragged about it at school, and then
Speaker 3: one of his schoolmates said that he had sat longer
Speaker 3: on a ball than my nephew did, which was I
Speaker 3: think he did an hour and three minutes and someone
Speaker 3: at his school did an hour and five minutes or
Speaker 3: something and didn't get a record, so didn't get no certificate,
Speaker 3: and so he was like, I know it's fake, and
Speaker 3: so I felt so bad because I'm like, oh my god,
Speaker 3: I made my nephew look stupid at school like that's
Speaker 3: I didn't even think of the fallout from that, and
Speaker 3: I should have because I'm like, I'm so upset still
Speaker 3: about my parents never not telling me that Santa wasn't
Speaker 3: real until so late, because it made me look so
Speaker 3: dumb for so long.
Speaker 1: But you know, you make mistakes. I learned I won't
Speaker 1: do that to him again.
Speaker 2: Well here, real, here's how you make up for it.
Speaker 2: You got to find the other kids that told him
Speaker 2: he was a liar. You got trick. Yeah, you can
Speaker 2: either get a certificate or you can tell them something
Speaker 2: wrong about like uh, the Grand Canyon or something so
Speaker 2: that they're they have some stupid thing rattling.
Speaker 6: Yeah, well, I would say, show up at the school,
Speaker 6: find that kid and be like, hey, listen, I'm this
Speaker 6: boy's aunt.
Speaker 4: Santa isn't real.
Speaker 3: It destroy the He just can be like, my aunt
Speaker 3: is famous and that will be a currency for the
Speaker 3: rest of his life. That I actually do think about
Speaker 3: as a gift giving to my niece and nephews.
Speaker 1: I do think that is a gift. I don't care.
Speaker 3: I don't look at it like wow, I'm famous, and
Speaker 3: I'll walk around like that. But I know that if
Speaker 3: I were a kid, final thought. I know, if I
Speaker 3: were a kid, yeah, I would have killed for a
Speaker 3: famous aunt or uncle. I mean, I remember one time
Speaker 3: my TV Bob, my uncle TV was on TV one
Speaker 3: time for a segment for being a Maleman, and I
Speaker 3: talked about that endlessly. I was like, my uncle was
Speaker 3: on TV, So I'm like, I do think there's part
Speaker 3: of the reason I like success is so that people
Speaker 3: in my life can brag about it. So whenever someone
Speaker 3: is like I didn't tell them I know you, I'm.
Speaker 1: Always like please.
Speaker 3: That is the only reason I do this isn't that
Speaker 3: that's like a cool thing to give your friends and
Speaker 3: family Like myself, I do.
Speaker 4: It for them.
Speaker 2: I tell people that Nikki Glazers my aunt all the.
Speaker 1: Time, Brian, we have a really weird family where h yeah,
Speaker 1: I know, I love it.
Speaker 6: That's that should be every child's dream. Like when I
Speaker 6: was ten at basketball camp, I told everyone I was
Speaker 6: Chris Farley's cousin, yes, and like I'm not, but well.
Speaker 3: Sean, even you, sometimes I'm like, no one like You'll
Speaker 3: I'll be on the road with you or something and
Speaker 3: be able to be like, how should I introduce you?
Speaker 3: And you're like, just say Comedy Central and uh, just
Speaker 3: like he's a guy, And I'm like, how about you
Speaker 3: were like Norm McDonald's best friend and opener and show
Speaker 3: like like and you were, you know, like having a
Speaker 3: Norm McDonald next to your name and like being having
Speaker 3: the approval of Nor McDonald is like the best achievement
Speaker 3: in comedy like any comedian and like instantly gives you
Speaker 3: this like uh status within our community, even with fans
Speaker 3: of comedy. And that's always surprising to me that you
Speaker 3: like kind of hold back on that.
Speaker 6: Oh, I'm just like I'm just so so embarrassed to
Speaker 6: give credits, Like I really wish I could still do
Speaker 6: clubs and colleges all over.
Speaker 3: We can will still let you have that, But like,
Speaker 3: what is that in you that like finally reached that
Speaker 3: level where like, you know, if someone would have asked
Speaker 3: you what your dream job would have been when you
Speaker 3: first got in this business, it would have been like
Speaker 3: being buddies with Norm McDonald, like writing for him, writing
Speaker 3: with him, being on the road with him.
Speaker 1: And then you achieve it and you don't want to
Speaker 1: talk about it. I think, what is that?
Speaker 4: I don't know?
Speaker 6: I you know what, this is actually a great thing
Speaker 6: that I should probably bring up in therapy because like
Speaker 6: it really was like my dream.
Speaker 2: It's any sure, maybe it's like low self esteem, like
Speaker 2: you don't believe that you deserve that time.
Speaker 3: I think that's it too, because you also don't You
Speaker 3: didn't we just talk about this. Don't you feel like
Speaker 3: you tricked Norm in some way and that he actually
Speaker 3: even though he did tell you you were hilarious, you
Speaker 3: still think you, like somehow tricked Norm.
Speaker 6: Yeah, I thought I tricked him or he was fucking
Speaker 6: with me, and I can't I'm constantly going between the two.
Speaker 3: God, it's like even once you get it, you can't
Speaker 3: even it will never Like we were talking about this,
Speaker 3: it will never land the other night we were talking
Speaker 3: about with Emily Catalana. We were on the road and
Speaker 3: Canada backstage, and we were talking about is there any
Speaker 3: compliment that would ever land for you where you wouldn't
Speaker 3: kind of go like that, where you wouldn't try to
Speaker 3: weasel the compliment away or kind of excuse it. And
Speaker 3: I went through every compliment I could ever get from anyone,
Speaker 3: and I just couldn't really, I couldn't really let any
Speaker 3: of them in. There was always some kind of excuse
Speaker 3: I could make of like they're being nice or or
Speaker 3: they've only seen this work that I've done, and that
Speaker 3: thing was actually really good, but like the rest of
Speaker 3: the work I've done was like crap. And if they
Speaker 3: really saw that? Who did I just see that was
Speaker 3: talking this way and I was like, oh, oh, oh
Speaker 3: it was this morning. Do I have to stay where
Speaker 3: I saw it?
Speaker 2: No?
Speaker 3: I don't, Okay, So this morning I was my eyes
Speaker 3: were open, so you know where they were looking, and
Speaker 3: I saw a thing.
Speaker 1: About it was Billie Eilish singing beautifully.
Speaker 3: It's like her infinius in their bedroom that they share,
Speaker 3: I'm guessing, and they were recording and she's on the bed,
Speaker 3: she's on their bed, he's at the desk and the
Speaker 3: recording and she does some like amazing whisper falsetto beautiful,
Speaker 3: like you know, run, and she's singing and then he goes,
Speaker 3: all right, that was good, and he's like stops the tape.
Speaker 3: But she was like that was disgusting and horrible and
Speaker 3: it sounded literally perfect right like Billie Eilish perfection.
Speaker 4: And she was like ough.
Speaker 3: She was like this, so I'm so bad and he
Speaker 3: was like, no, it wasn't that was great, and he's
Speaker 3: like used to this. You can tell he's like used
Speaker 3: to this at this point. And she's like, I cannot
Speaker 3: believe we have to have this album done a day
Speaker 3: before my birthday. He goes, no, we have to have
Speaker 3: it mastered a day before your birthday. I'll be done
Speaker 3: weeks before then. And she was like, well, it's not
Speaker 3: going to be because I'm crap and I always have
Speaker 3: been crap, and I'm horrible and I'm terrible and I'm
Speaker 3: the worst singer. And it's just like it was. I
Speaker 3: send it to Chris because I was like, oh my god,
Speaker 3: this is you are phineas I am Billy. Like we
Speaker 3: only have sex a little like once a month when
Speaker 3: we're in the creative process and there's not like a
Speaker 3: lot of romance going on. No, So I was like,
Speaker 3: that's so us Like it felt really good to see
Speaker 3: that kind of It sounds really good to see that
Speaker 3: kind of doubt in someone that is inarguably just insanely
Speaker 3: talented and almost seems to be naturally talented. Doesn't even
Speaker 3: have to try, even though I think there's definitely a
Speaker 3: lot of effort behind it in a good way, like
Speaker 3: she's trained, you know. But it was so good to
Speaker 3: hear her say like, literally, she's dog shit. She was like,
Speaker 3: I'm horrible, and she believes it. I mean, she really
Speaker 3: believes it in a way that I'm like, that's the
Speaker 3: way I feel about myself when I'm trying to convince
Speaker 3: someone who's like, no, you're good, Like I felt so
Speaker 3: hard the exact same way she felt, And it felt
Speaker 3: so good to see someone that I know is inarguably
Speaker 3: the best feel that way.
Speaker 4: It was.
Speaker 3: It's like that really made my day to see that
Speaker 3: Billie Elish is insecure.
Speaker 4: Of course she is, Yes, why wouldn't you be insecure?
Speaker 6: Like insecurity is Honestly, feeling secure is just so foreign
Speaker 6: to me.
Speaker 4: I love being insecure.
Speaker 6: I embrace it, and also it helps me push through
Speaker 6: then I try harder.
Speaker 2: It's like, yeah, that's the key, Like insecurity is one
Speaker 2: way in order for you to become great. Is constantly
Speaker 2: manifests in different ways for different people. But I think
Speaker 2: like you need to constantly be saying you're bad in
Speaker 2: order to actually propel yourself to greatness. I'm sure Michael
Speaker 2: Jordan was like this is I'm not good enough, I'm
Speaker 2: not good enough, Oliver and over again. Kobe was probably
Speaker 2: like that in order to become the great, the great,
Speaker 2: But also he didn't.
Speaker 1: I think there is. I think it's harmful at some
Speaker 1: point to be like that self loathing.
Speaker 3: I think that some happy medium like where you and Oh,
Speaker 3: I wanted to share this quick thing about like let's
Speaker 3: talk about famous people. I said it yesterday where I've
Speaker 3: learned about some famous person that actually.
Speaker 1: Like there was a story that really disappointed me.
Speaker 3: So this weekend in at the hotel for the oscars,
Speaker 3: Emily was running down to go get something urgently, and
Speaker 3: she had to jump in this elevator that was kind
Speaker 3: of full because the elevators were kind of all fucked up,
Speaker 3: you know. She jumped in this elevator and she like
Speaker 3: immediately felt the vibe and there was like what are
Speaker 3: you doing in here? And she got on the elevator
Speaker 3: and instantly someone she's standing next to a very famous person.
Speaker 1: And that person, who we.
Speaker 3: All thought was like cool, I would have been like,
Speaker 3: oh my god, I can't wait to be friends with
Speaker 3: this person. The person that person gave her like a
Speaker 3: really dirty look. And Emily, by the way, is like doesn't.
Speaker 3: She's never like that person's a bit. She's always like
Speaker 3: understanding of like, no, they're a famous person, they should
Speaker 3: be that way.
Speaker 1: But she was like, this was so disappointing.
Speaker 3: And then that person like kind of gave her a
Speaker 3: look like what are you doing on this elevator even
Speaker 3: though it's a public fucking elevator. The person that person's
Speaker 3: like handler or whatever, was like, do you are you
Speaker 3: staying in this hotel to Emily and she goes, no,
Speaker 3: my client is, and she goes, do you really need
Speaker 3: to be in here right now? And like it almost
Speaker 3: asked her to get out of the next floor. Emily
Speaker 3: stayed the whole time, and so she said, it was
Speaker 3: like there was another example of like there's a person that,
Speaker 3: like Emily once encountered in an elevator who uh uh,
Speaker 3: Like it was the vibe at this event where you
Speaker 3: do not ride the elevator with this person like they
Speaker 3: if they're in the elevator, you do not ride with
Speaker 3: them like they are to ride alone, which is like
Speaker 3: a standard. And she accidentally got on this elevator like
Speaker 3: in a rush because she was in a rush, and
Speaker 3: she like slid in and then she got in and
Speaker 3: realized I'm in.
Speaker 1: The elevator with the person, and it was like and
Speaker 1: you're just not supposed to.
Speaker 3: So we she was like it was giving that energy
Speaker 3: even though that person would like deserve to have their
Speaker 3: own elevator, Like it wasn't like a bad thing. It
Speaker 3: was just kind of like the vibe of it was
Speaker 3: like the rule, you know, because that person needed to
Speaker 3: be wherever they need to be. This person, however, didn't
Speaker 3: need to have this vibe and it instantly ruined them.
Speaker 3: For me, I'll never know who it is because I'm
Speaker 3: not going to divulge enough and just I just know
Speaker 3: though that I like, I went from like loving this person,
Speaker 3: always watching everything they do on my feed, and I
Speaker 3: went to like almost to the lengths. I'm almost at
Speaker 3: the point where I'm because I got served them so
Speaker 3: much yesterday and I'm like, I need to mute this
Speaker 3: person's name, like I don't want to see this person
Speaker 3: ever again, because they were rude to my friend not cool.
Speaker 3: Like now doesn't surprise me because I'm like looking at
Speaker 3: all the signs, I'm like, yeah, of course they're rude.
Speaker 3: And so our new phrase when someone when I like
Speaker 3: because then later on we were talking to like my
Speaker 3: hair and makeup team about this person. We were like
Speaker 3: talking shit and and then Emily said something that was
Speaker 3: kind of like ball busty to me, and I was like,
Speaker 3: I'm gonna need you to get out of my elevator.
Speaker 3: And so that that's a new phrase for when someone
Speaker 3: is like needs to just stop what they're saying because
Speaker 3: you're not in the mood for it.
Speaker 1: You need them to get out of your elevator. So
Speaker 1: I want to like spread that.
Speaker 3: I think we can all use that right now of like, hey,
Speaker 3: I'm gonna need you to get out of my elevator
Speaker 3: right where you need to be left alone and you
Speaker 3: need to ride and pee.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I love it. I can't believe June and Squib
Speaker 4: was such a fun. Yeah.
Speaker 3: This person, I'm not even gonna give them a gender,
Speaker 3: was just like it's just so disappointing when someone is
Speaker 3: like you think they're gonna be cool and they're not. Like, man,
Speaker 3: it's I just want to celebrate the people who are
Speaker 3: cool and like, here, let me give a le let's
Speaker 3: end on a high note. I just posted a picture
Speaker 3: of Jackie Tone, who is on Nobody Wants This among
Speaker 3: many other things. She was also in Glow, I believe.
Speaker 3: But Jackie Tone t hn so funny, so charismatic, so kind.
Speaker 3: I ran into her at the Elton John party. She
Speaker 3: like invited me into her People magazine like photo shoot.
Speaker 3: We did a picture together. And then Lisa Curry, another comedian,
Speaker 3: after I posted that picture, wrote to me and was
Speaker 3: like I love her so much, and I was like,
Speaker 3: isn't it? And she just got upgraded to a series
Speaker 3: regular on Nobody Wants This. She was a you know,
Speaker 3: a supporting character before and then they made her a
Speaker 3: main character, which is like speaks to her town like
Speaker 3: they only do that when the person like people want
Speaker 3: more of them. And she plays like a bitch on
Speaker 3: the show, like it's it's amazing that she's able to
Speaker 3: build this carric like she just shines.
Speaker 1: She's so good.
Speaker 3: But Lisa Currey wrote to me and was like, she
Speaker 3: was so nice to me at this one event she
Speaker 3: like remembered my name, was so kind and we were
Speaker 3: both just like, isn't it great when nice people are successful?
Speaker 3: And we're both like, yeah, fucking Jackie Tone, Like that's
Speaker 3: that's the kind of person you want succeeding. And I
Speaker 3: would have thought the elevator person was a Jackie Tone.
Speaker 1: I really would have. So sometimes they trick you, man,
Speaker 1: Sometimes they trick you.
Speaker 4: Just be nice. Everyone should be nice. It's free, Yeah.
Speaker 2: I mean, I would argue that it costs something to
Speaker 2: be nice.
Speaker 1: It takes, yeah, it does. It takes extra hours so much.
Speaker 2: Rather just like ignore everything you know.
Speaker 1: And just be like, oh my god, it's so easy
Speaker 1: to be cunty.
Speaker 2: When you're in the mood. It's easy to be nice,
Speaker 2: But when you're in a bad mood, it's just can't
Speaker 2: just keep going.
Speaker 3: Yeah, people go oh, smile and take this many muscles
Speaker 3: and frowning takes four times as many.
Speaker 1: I'm like, but no one is like walking around.
Speaker 2: Like yeah, I'm not.
Speaker 1: Lily Rose dep on the Red Carpet. It's like doing nothing,
Speaker 1: takes no muscles.
Speaker 3: Knows that reference. Lily Rose Depp is art. Lily Rose
Speaker 3: dep go look, go google Lily Rose dep on Red carpets.
Speaker 3: She makes this face every single time.
Speaker 4: Wow, it's just she is cost and.
Speaker 3: It's art because a second I've seen like some of
Speaker 3: the video of her posing on the red carpet. The
Speaker 3: second she's done posing, she goes into a smile and
Speaker 3: is like natural again. She is trying to look like
Speaker 3: cunty on the red carpet. And I used to judge
Speaker 3: it and be like, why is she making that face?
Speaker 3: And now I'm like, I fucking love it. I love
Speaker 3: a choice that is like kind of antagonizing people who
Speaker 3: are supposed to just you know, you're always suposed to
Speaker 3: be cheery and like so effervescent on the red carpet.
Speaker 1: Fucking cool, cool move. I love it.
Speaker 3: All right, gotta go, Thank you for listening this week.
Speaker 3: We'll be back next week. Don't you think we won't
Speaker 3: Sean O'Connor, Brian Frajie, thank you, Noah, and thank you
Speaker 3: for listening so much. We'll be in Hartford, Connecticut this
Speaker 3: weekend Portland, Maine, two shows.
Speaker 1: I'll see you then or maybe I won't, but we'll
Speaker 1: see you next week on the show Don't Be good Bye.
Speaker 3: The Nicki Glazer Podcast is a production by Will Ferrell's
Speaker 3: Big Money Players and iHeart Podcasts. Created and hosted by
Speaker 3: me Nicki Glazer, co hosted by Brian Frangie, Executive produced
Speaker 3: by Will Ferrell, Hans Sonny and Noah Avior edited it
Speaker 3: engineered by Lean and Loaf, video production Mark Canton, and
Speaker 3: music by Anya Marina. You can now watch full episodes
Speaker 3: of the Nicki Glazer Podcast on YouTube, follow at Nicki
Speaker 3: Glazer Pod and subscribe to our channel