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Speaker 1: Two hopeless one dating app. Then there's you swipe right.

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Speaker 2: The question is.

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Speaker 3: Whose love life is more tragic.

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Speaker 2: It's Battle of the Dates.

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Speaker 4: It's a dating game show that's hotter than a metal

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Speaker 4: spoon in a crack den battle of where we find

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Speaker 4: out whose love life is the most tragic.

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Speaker 2: We'll explain the rules in just a second.

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Speaker 4: First, let's meet today's contestants over in this corner. When

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Speaker 4: it comes to dating men, she likes some tall, gray

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Speaker 4: and rail thin. That's why they call her Antenna Jenna.

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Speaker 2: Well yeah, yeah.

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Speaker 4: And in the other corner, her perfect date night ends

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Speaker 4: with a romantic couple's bath in a giant tub filled

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Speaker 4: with maple syrup.

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Speaker 2: That's how she got the name Sticky Nicky.

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Speaker 5: Oh my god, you must be extractive if you can

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Speaker 5: talk anyone into that.

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Speaker 2: But here's how the game works.

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Speaker 4: We gotta have one contestant start by telling one of

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Speaker 4: their worst dating stories. Then the other will try and

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Speaker 4: counter with the nightmare story of their own. We're going

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Speaker 4: back and forth for three rounds until we declare a winner.

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Speaker 2: We're gonna start things off today with Antenna Jenna. Let's

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Speaker 2: go all right.

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Speaker 5: So a guy and I went out to dinner at

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Speaker 5: a fond due place, and so we get bread and

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Speaker 5: some other things to dip in it, and we're having

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Speaker 5: a great time, and I get up to use the

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Speaker 5: powder room and then when I come back, I catch

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Speaker 5: him holding the pot with two hands and drinking out

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Speaker 5: of it like its soup.

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Speaker 2: Melted cheese.

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Speaker 5: Oh yeah, don't think this was his first time.

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Speaker 2: No, not lactose intolerant. That kind of impressed. Let's go

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Speaker 2: over to Nikki. Can you punch that?

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Speaker 3: Yeah? Hey, guys, So one of the guys they dated,

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Speaker 3: he came back to my place after an amazing date, okay,

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Speaker 3: and we both kept drinking obviously, you know, but he

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Speaker 3: ended up not being able to handle it, and he's

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Speaker 3: really becoming more out of it, to say the least.

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Speaker 3: And at one point he sees a picture of me

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Speaker 3: and my sister, and you know, he says, oh, you

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Speaker 3: might be a seven, but your sister for sure isn't eight.

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Speaker 1: And then he pukes on the picture.

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Speaker 5: Oh gosh, So you made out with him that right?

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Speaker 1: Oh for sure? I did. Definitely.

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Speaker 4: All right, off to a strong start round around number two.

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Speaker 4: And that means, Jenna, we're back.

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Speaker 1: To you, all right.

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Speaker 5: So a guy and I went out a few times,

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Speaker 5: and so one weekend we planned to hang out and

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Speaker 5: he told me to pack a suitcase. We're going to

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Speaker 5: do a day trip somewhere and it's a surprise. He

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Speaker 5: tells me to meet him at the airport.

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Speaker 2: Okay.

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Speaker 5: I get there and meet him and I'm like, all right, so, like,

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Speaker 5: where are we going? Turns out it was the airport.

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Speaker 5: Our day trip was to the airport. Oh, you couldn't

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Speaker 5: even go through security because you didn't have tickets, so

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Speaker 5: you just the outside.

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Speaker 2: I mean, in his.

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Speaker 4: Defense, there's a lot of nice coffee shops and stores,

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Speaker 4: but on the other side of t s A you've

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Speaker 4: got a bite ticket to access them.

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Speaker 3: Couple.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, all right, not as exciting as we thought. Nikki,

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Speaker 2: it's your turn.

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Speaker 1: I met a guy who was kind of cute but

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Speaker 1: kind of but man, you know, he held that British

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Speaker 1: accent pretty.

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Speaker 4: Good, you know, time that adds like five points to

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Speaker 4: any hotness scale men or women.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: Well, halfway through our drinks that accent disappeared.

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Speaker 5: I mean, who hasn't faked an accent for a night?

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Speaker 2: I know, I hate It's really fun.

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Speaker 1: This is super rare on the guys and be honest,

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Speaker 1: I called him out. Okay, Okay, Well that's when he

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Speaker 1: admits that he's been just watching Harry Potter on repeat.

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Speaker 2: We were doing when Guardian Leveosa on you.

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Speaker 1: All night, yeah, to stop it all off. He told

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Speaker 1: me he's gone way more dates because of it.

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Speaker 4: Yeah. I think we're pretty much tied up at this point.

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Speaker 4: It's anybody's game. That means as we go into the

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Speaker 4: third and final round, we need your best stories ladies.

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Speaker 2: So, Jenna, what have you got?

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Speaker 5: Okay? So I had this guy take me on one

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Speaker 5: of those huge city ferris wheels and at the top

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Speaker 5: we stopped moving.

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Speaker 2: That's the very top, very top.

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Speaker 5: Okay, but you know it's nice because you're seeing pretty things,

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Speaker 5: but it's like it's it's an unnatural amount of time.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, when you're like, oh my god.

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Speaker 5: So I asked, you know, like you think everything's okay,

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Speaker 5: and then this guy's like, oh no, my buddy runs this.

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Speaker 5: So I asked him if you could stop it while

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Speaker 5: we were at the top, you know, for a quick

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Speaker 5: cook up.

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Speaker 6: It's gonna be romantic and it's gonna be like for

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Speaker 6: a little kids.

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Speaker 2: Quick. He's like, we only need like three to hook up.

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Speaker 2: With the whole view of the city. You went through

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Speaker 2: with it obviously, no, no, no, no. And then the ferris

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Speaker 2: wheel booth is rocket bring us down? Yeah.

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Speaker 5: So then he calls his buddy on speakerphone and says, hey,

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Speaker 5: press the button. Another one said no one.

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Speaker 4: Wow, it's kind of cool that he can just call

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Speaker 4: his buddy control the whole thing. Okay, we only got

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Speaker 4: time for one more, Nikki, let's hear it.

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Speaker 1: So me and this guy did an escape room together.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: Well I am so not good at them, but I

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Speaker 1: figured it'd be fun. So we're in there, like in

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Speaker 1: it and we couldn't figure out like any of the clues,

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Speaker 1: any of them.

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Speaker 2: Of them and not like go to the book.

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Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, no, I need some brush up on like

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Speaker 1: all of the games. Obviously it does. Two. When I

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Speaker 1: looked over in the corner, he was crying.

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Speaker 3: He was like, you guys, legitimately breaking down, and I

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Speaker 3: mean the worst part of it, you know.

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Speaker 1: He refused to even go to the emergency exit.

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Speaker 2: No, ye, walk out door.

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Speaker 3: I'm sorry.

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Speaker 2: If I was the people running that, I wouldn't let

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Speaker 2: you out either.

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Speaker 5: This ideal of what would be happening would be too

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Speaker 5: good to watch.

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Speaker 1: Oh my god, so rude.

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Speaker 6: But the I mean the worst worst is instead of

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Speaker 6: going through the emergency exit, like he insisted up calling

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Speaker 6: his mom, did she call?

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Speaker 1: It? Became this childhood trauma talk with like how he

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Speaker 1: blamed her for it because they didn't do enough puzzles

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Speaker 1: when they were a kidd.

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Speaker 4: Oh god, her faults that he couldn't solve the escape roam.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, can we vote for the mom in this game

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Speaker 5: because that you're.

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Speaker 2: The worst for her for some reason.

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Speaker 4: I blame her too for making that date back. But

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Speaker 4: we heard the final bell that means the matches over judges.

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Speaker 4: Let's score it, Alexis.

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Speaker 2: I gotta go Jenna for the ferris wheel. Already got

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Speaker 2: a fear of those. Oh my god, I can't still

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Speaker 2: get over the fon du pot.

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Speaker 4: Jenna, you got my I mean, congratulations, Antenna, Jenna, you

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Speaker 4: have our sympathy and our respect for the worst dating.

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Speaker 2: Life of the week.

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Speaker 5: I am getting something out of this nightmare.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, thank you for playing. Remember Textan seventy five nine

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Speaker 4: to two. If you want to appear on the next

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Speaker 4: edition of Battle of the Tender Dates, your phone TAP's

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Speaker 4: coming up right after this