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Speaker 1: Hello the Internet, and welcome to this episode of another

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Speaker 1: transites the dust. That's courtesy of No Clue. But who

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Speaker 1: did it? No Clue? Oh wow, got us again, no

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Speaker 1: clue on the discord. I like that you gave up

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Speaker 1: on I feel like who's on first works better if

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Speaker 1: after the second time I forget it. I know. It's

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Speaker 1: just I know, I know you're talking about Okay, oh damn,

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Speaker 1: two lines along. Just a great series of videos, very

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Speaker 1: well known bits, but you just bail on them so early,

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Speaker 1: like realistic versions where the persons like, oh who oh damn. Right.

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Speaker 1: I was confused there for a second. The family comes

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Speaker 1: in and they say they're auditioning for the show and

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Speaker 1: it's called the Aristocrats. All right, Uh, State of the Union,

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Speaker 1: it's all anyone's talking about right now, we're not talking about.

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Speaker 1: We're talking about it wasn't talked about. I might just

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Speaker 1: be on this, uh, trying not to be swayed by

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Speaker 1: my own take ahead of the State of the Union

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Speaker 1: that nobody gives a sh about states states of the

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Speaker 1: Union anymore. But in the aftermath of the State of

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Speaker 1: the Union, it does feel like it didn't happen, Like

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Speaker 1: there there's stuff on the front page of the New

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Speaker 1: York Times. I guess, but it's not like I don't know.

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Speaker 1: It just feels like I did. I didn't, could have

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Speaker 1: easily missed it. Yeah, And who can blame you when

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Speaker 1: there's like an actual conflict happening, like real ship happening

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Speaker 1: on the other side of the planet and you're like this.

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Speaker 1: I don't blame you, though, Um yeah, I mean like

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Speaker 1: I I feel like that's there. There's that. And also

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Speaker 1: because he didn't say look like we were saying, if

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Speaker 1: you're gonna announce something, actually uh you know, interesting they

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Speaker 1: say something that's going to help people, especially working people,

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Speaker 1: then yeah, may be that would have been something. But

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Speaker 1: if a lot of it was him just sort of

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Speaker 1: clarifying the U S's position on Ukraine then being like,

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Speaker 1: what if we gave you little bits and bobs have

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Speaker 1: build back better? Do it like that the b B

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Speaker 1: B B B bits and bobs of build back better? Exactly?

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Speaker 1: I gotta keep it all literative. Well, I know, my

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Speaker 1: girl MTG and Lauren Bobert were trying to bring some

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Speaker 1: of that world wrestling entertainment energy to the to the show. Surprise,

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Speaker 1: they didn't have fucking signs like they were actually at

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Speaker 1: a w W E like fucking show. Yeah, because they

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Speaker 1: were standing up and heckling and turning around and um yeah.

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Speaker 1: That was what was wild to me, is that, like

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Speaker 1: it does feel like the sort of thing you like

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Speaker 1: see trending and everybody's talking about when you know, the

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Speaker 1: open white supremacist in Congress starts shouting at the president

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Speaker 1: during the State of the Union. Like in the past,

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Speaker 1: the most we got was somebody saying, you why, and

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Speaker 1: everybody be like, what shut the funk up? Man? Um,

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Speaker 1: this time she was you know, heckling throughout she she

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Speaker 1: was doing director's commentary and was booed, you know pretty quickly,

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Speaker 1: even like Republicans are like, yo, shut the funk up,

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Speaker 1: Like so on some level, the olds of the Congress,

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Speaker 1: uh still believe in, you know, decorum on some level,

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Speaker 1: especially when you're like talking about like your your son

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Speaker 1: who died and you're talking about like their service like

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Speaker 1: in the military and like being your burn bits and

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Speaker 1: then like blah blah blah, like you shut up, shut

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Speaker 1: up really quick, Sorry about that, Joe, go on, we'll

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Speaker 1: slam you after this is over, like polite Republicans. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I still can't get. Anytime I think too long about

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Speaker 1: Marjorie Taylor Green, I can't not think of what she

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Speaker 1: thinks of pull up looks like. But that's you know,

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Speaker 1: like the distraction. I shouldn't care that much about that,

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Speaker 1: but I'm just I feel for the bulging disks in

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Speaker 1: her back it. But you know, her pull up form

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Speaker 1: is kind of like it sums up the mentality of

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Speaker 1: like right wing conserved, like you know, super right wing people,

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Speaker 1: which is like, yeah, maybe everyone else says this is

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Speaker 1: absolutely the incorrect way of doing something, even experts, but

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Speaker 1: it's how I do it, and therefore it's right. And

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Speaker 1: I don't mind putting it on the internet because I

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Speaker 1: am the main character. Like if somebody were to create

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Speaker 1: a interpretive dance wherein the thesis was fuck your science,

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Speaker 1: I think Marjorie Taylor Green's would be the that the

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Speaker 1: human body in motion version of that sentence, right, and

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Speaker 1: in that context it would have been like a circus

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Speaker 1: la dance performance that might have moved people, like in

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Speaker 1: a different setting. And like the way she convulses shows

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Speaker 1: like the absolute violent Yeah, when she's just out here

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Speaker 1: being like and this is why I'm strong, You're like, Okay,

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Speaker 1: we get it also mentioned as an AOC pointed out

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Speaker 1: to no mention a student debt relief. We're just kicking

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Speaker 1: that can down the road until May one and then

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Speaker 1: we'll see what happens again. But like, my god, were

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Speaker 1: you not talking out loud about that on your way

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Speaker 1: to the White House? M And you're not even like,

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Speaker 1: oh yeah about that. I think we'll get to them later.

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Speaker 1: Haven't they made like reverse progress on that? Didn't they

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Speaker 1: say that they were gonna not relieve the student debt?

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Speaker 1: I mean so far? I mean yeah, the most was

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Speaker 1: like okay, they said we weren't. They're like, okay, actually,

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Speaker 1: we'll extend the morator until May one, will pause it

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Speaker 1: till then, and then we'll see will there be developments?

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Speaker 1: Will they realize that you can't just keep I don't know,

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Speaker 1: like when you look at the significant amount of people

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Speaker 1: who would benefit from it, it's like this is this

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Speaker 1: winds but whatever bullet train just dropped for anybody needing

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Speaker 1: a distraction? Uh? This which I think is everyone a

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Speaker 1: new action or starring Bread Pitt, Bread Pitts, My Bad,

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Speaker 1: your Dad, and a bunch of other like Bad Bunny,

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Speaker 1: paper Boy, I think is in there. Um, a couple

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Speaker 1: other people. It has all the trappings of a movie

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Speaker 1: I would be like, yeah, okay, but it also feels

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Speaker 1: like it needs something like a vision behind it, like that,

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Speaker 1: you know, the this is the sort of thing that

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Speaker 1: you usually see come with like from the director that

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Speaker 1: brought you this like exciting movie. Um, and it's from

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Speaker 1: the director of Deadpool two, which it is not. I

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Speaker 1: don't know. I guess I didn't think that that was.

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Speaker 1: I was expecting a respected autour like Mick g or

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Speaker 1: something like that. You know. Well, I mean yeah, also,

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Speaker 1: did uh did he direct Atomic Blonde to Oh? Okay,

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Speaker 1: that's why that's why the stunts are director? Yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 1: all right, now I'm back on board your back, baby.

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Speaker 1: I was like, they should have given it to somebody

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Speaker 1: like the stunt guy from john Wick, I mean, just

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Speaker 1: from like the little first john Wick, right, I think so?

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Speaker 1: And then I know he did like the second one.

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Speaker 1: And that's how like after Atomic Blond, they're like, yeah, okay,

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Speaker 1: this they do good action stuff. We like that. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: and there's like a son of the Hidoyakis in it, um,

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Speaker 1: like a few other you know, Japanese actors too. I

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Speaker 1: was like, Okay, look at them again. It looks fun.

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Speaker 1: It looks fun. I don't know, it makes me miss

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Speaker 1: the funk out of Japan, though I can't like, I

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Speaker 1: just want to go back. But it's hard. It's hard

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Speaker 1: right now. Uncredited director of John Wick. Then Atmic Blond,

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Speaker 1: than Deadpool two, then Fast and Furious presents Hobbs and Shaw.

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Speaker 1: So this man's out here putting some putting together a

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Speaker 1: career of action movies. Yeah, I hear very remixed things

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Speaker 1: on so but like the people who really who like

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Speaker 1: Atomic Blonde or hobs On Shaw really seem to like it,

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Speaker 1: um and vice versa. Well, I'm I'm gonna keep an

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Speaker 1: eye on that. One target is trending because they I mean,

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Speaker 1: this is like some good news targets. So this week

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Speaker 1: it would lift hourly wages for workers and distribution centers

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Speaker 1: and stores to a range of fifteen dollars to four

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Speaker 1: dollars an hour, depending on location position. The total investment

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Speaker 1: will amount to three million dollars um. That's yeah, that's it.

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Speaker 1: Only I believed didn't they do something like a hundred

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Speaker 1: and hundred billion and like they did something create like

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Speaker 1: really out ridiculous in the last few years. But their

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Speaker 1: revenues keep growing and you're like, you know, three million

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Speaker 1: eight shit right compared to what you fucking make. And

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Speaker 1: I was like, I was interesting to see that number

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Speaker 1: put in, you know what I mean, because typically just

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Speaker 1: say you'll you'll hear headlines or read headlines or it says, oh, yeah,

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Speaker 1: they're gonna be raising wages and not actually quantifying that

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Speaker 1: it's an investment of this x amount of dollars, because

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Speaker 1: that really helps put into perspective that you're like, you

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Speaker 1: have all this leftover fucking money on the side to

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Speaker 1: go to everybody else, but you can't even chip off

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Speaker 1: a little bit there million to keep the people that

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Speaker 1: are making you the fucking money, uh, putting them in

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Speaker 1: a place of some what prosperity. The thing that really

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Speaker 1: shocked me about this news is that their stock price

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Speaker 1: actually seems to have gone up, which usually the stock

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Speaker 1: market is like, what is this hippie bullshit? They got no,

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Speaker 1: they got hit when they said they wouldn't raise prices already.

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Speaker 1: I think that's when the real scummy, like, I mean,

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Speaker 1: anybody who's like, you know, a shareholder they're in demanding

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Speaker 1: answers is scummy. But it seemed like there was more

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Speaker 1: upset when like more upset feelings when they said they're like,

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Speaker 1: I don't know if we need to be raising prices

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Speaker 1: right now, and they're like, what the funk everyone else

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Speaker 1: is You guys are doomed, but like we don't need to,

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Speaker 1: but everyone else is, and you can and you can

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Speaker 1: squeeze people from for every cent they got until they're

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Speaker 1: completely destitute and then they'll but then they'll go to

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Speaker 1: our competitors. Actually, no, that's an interesting idea. Okay, maybe

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Speaker 1: the um the inflation thing that we've kind of talked

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Speaker 1: about over the past six months that like the conventional

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Speaker 1: wisdom was like inflation is happening because democrat and too

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Speaker 1: many giveaways. And it turns I told you I was

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Speaker 1: in trouble miles an almond had an almond and that's

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Speaker 1: that's always a dangerous game before I start recording. Anyways,

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Speaker 1: it turns out all the CEOs just decided they could

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Speaker 1: raise prices and are like just soaking up any excess

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Speaker 1: money that people have and then reporting record profits and

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Speaker 1: saying funk everything. So anyways, cool shout out to target

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Speaker 1: that targets, Like what if a corporation decided to like

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Speaker 1: be the good guy. I mean, they're they're smart and

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Speaker 1: that they're they're getting in front of it. You know, like,

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Speaker 1: I don't know how many real ben elevent benevolent, uh

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Speaker 1: gigantic retail outfits are out there in this country that

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Speaker 1: are truly motivated to be like, no, man, we gotta

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Speaker 1: really rethink how this whole thing works. We gotta, we

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Speaker 1: gotta really, we really gotta show the workers that that

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Speaker 1: they're part of this and they should share in the

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Speaker 1: spoils of it all. But I don't know, it just

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Speaker 1: seems like because even their press release around it was like,

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Speaker 1: you know, these are the people like who who help

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Speaker 1: us achieve our goals. It only makes sense to reinvest

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Speaker 1: in them. Um. So yeah, I don't know, but believe

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Speaker 1: the stock market didn't just go fuck you, Target, which

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Speaker 1: I'm sure some people did. But yeah, great, you know

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Speaker 1: you love to see it. So let's see. Let's see

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Speaker 1: more now, I mean, they should they should just be

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Speaker 1: like our minimum ways now. Yeah, all right, let's take

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Speaker 1: a quick break. We'll be right back to talk Girl Scout, Cookies,

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Speaker 1: Rhonda Santis, and the thing on everyone's mind. The Cola

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Speaker 1: Wars have reached a new level. Starlight v. Nitro Ever winds,

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Speaker 1: we all lose terrible wrestling match, and we're back. So

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Speaker 1: parents and Girl Scout leaders are reporting that Girl Scouts

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Speaker 1: are being harassed while selling cookies. It's not not shocking

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Speaker 1: to me, just based on like where we find ourselves.

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Speaker 1: It seems like America collectively is going through some ship

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Speaker 1: just generally based on those videos of people who have

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Speaker 1: to be like, you know, tied up on planes and

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Speaker 1: ship um. But it's yeah, it's scary and weird and

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Speaker 1: a scary place to be as a civilization. When you

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Speaker 1: sell Girl Scout cookies, you kind of have to be

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Speaker 1: in a place where everybody is. You can't just be

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Speaker 1: like I'm gonna be at this thing that specifically appeals

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Speaker 1: to one certain political ideal like ideology. It's like it's

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Speaker 1: the supermarket, right like most of the time, and everybody

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Speaker 1: goes a supermarket, and I think that's when they're seeing

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Speaker 1: more things where people are either coming up to them.

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Speaker 1: They said. Girls as young quote girls as young as

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Speaker 1: five have been lectured for selling unhealthy food or um

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Speaker 1: or or getting upset over the cookies high prices. Why

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Speaker 1: are you haggling with a child over price? This is

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Speaker 1: not You're not in some like bizarre uh in another

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Speaker 1: country and you're like, I don't want to pay that

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Speaker 1: much for a Morocca. That's just too much. It's a

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Speaker 1: fucking this is a charitable endeavor and also training for

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Speaker 1: them to be salespeople. But the other thing is they've

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Speaker 1: also quote been berated over a conspirat c theory falsely

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Speaker 1: linking girl Scouts to planned parenthood. M hm, so you

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Speaker 1: got it all. You got the woo woo high fructost

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Speaker 1: corn corn syrup poison set. That's like this y'all should

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Speaker 1: be ashamed or how much they cost you know how

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Speaker 1: much they used to cost when I was your age

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Speaker 1: group of people, and then the straight up conspiracy theorists too.

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Speaker 1: So yeah, tough tough times for Girl Scouts. I think

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Speaker 1: humans of all time, he says. It says a lot though,

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Speaker 1: when you have adults pulling up to five year olds

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Speaker 1: like you, you really don't know how anything works, Like

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Speaker 1: I don't even know when I would ever be like,

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Speaker 1: hold on, man, I need this five year old to

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Speaker 1: be held accountable. Yeah. I feel like it's just um,

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Speaker 1: they have all this anger being held down and it's

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Speaker 1: coming out on the thing that doesn't scare them. They

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Speaker 1: like they can let it unleash it on. Yeah yeah,

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Speaker 1: and what better than a shift shivering and fear child.

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Speaker 1: I was just trying to sell young uh De Santis.

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Speaker 1: We just we always got to check in with this man,

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Speaker 1: uh want potentially the future president of these United States.

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Speaker 1: Uh speaking at University of South Florida, asked some students

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Speaker 1: to take their darn masks off. Yeah, this is I mean,

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Speaker 1: I think we'll talk about it on the show. There's

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Speaker 1: we're currently like in a moment where the rhetoric really

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Speaker 1: not matching the data at all. Um And in this instance,

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Speaker 1: it's clear that Rhonda Santis like absolutely just wants uh

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Speaker 1: like people to forget that there's a pandemic. So this

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Speaker 1: is him right before he takes like a lectern in

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Speaker 1: front of some university students. You do not have to

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Speaker 1: wear those masks. I mean, please take Honestly, you can

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Speaker 1: think we got to stop with this cocus theater. So

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Speaker 1: you want to wear it, fine, but this isn't This

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Speaker 1: is ridiculous. Damn he was piste too. Tell the the

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Speaker 1: black students take those masks off. Rates just proportionately affected

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Speaker 1: your community. Take those stupid things. Then he turns around

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Speaker 1: like they were Dr Fauci or some ship like God Gole.

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Speaker 1: I mean, this is just more right wing assholes punching down.

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Speaker 1: They just this is how they this is who they bully,

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Speaker 1: the bullyable, you know as kids. Asshole. Yeah, people need

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Speaker 1: to check that clip out of you. I mean yeah,

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Speaker 1: he really looks like they're trying to fucking like funk

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Speaker 1: his whole life up by wearing masks because they're because

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Speaker 1: they're they're like, I don't know, I'm not I don't

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Speaker 1: feel comfortable without wearing it in this situation. Also, b

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Speaker 1: you're like so reckless with your life. I don't know

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Speaker 1: where you've been. But it's interesting that he said the

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Speaker 1: COVID theater right, because I feel like that was there's

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Speaker 1: this thing there's always like this, like uh and now

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Speaker 1: I don't know where exact that came from, but I

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Speaker 1: felt like I would see more mainstream media outlets that

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Speaker 1: aren't necessarily like Fox News, but more like Slate or

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Speaker 1: The Daily Beast or things like that, say like right

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Speaker 1: up right on the topic of COVID theater, right of

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Speaker 1: like why are we disinfecting all this stuff like that?

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Speaker 1: When it doesn't need to be like it's just all

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Speaker 1: theatrical for us to feel safer and and makes like

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Speaker 1: decent points of like if it if it's actually not needed,

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Speaker 1: then what's the point um. But then that gets co

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Speaker 1: opted where Republicans like we're like have you heard they

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Speaker 1: say this thing COVID theater when they talk about that,

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Speaker 1: Like okay, let's use that, but apply that now to

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Speaker 1: people just trying to protect themselves, not about how it's

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Speaker 1: about over using cleaners and things like that, when they're

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Speaker 1: not necessary to just say you're wearing a mask that's

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Speaker 1: COVID theater. They do nothing, even though the science does

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Speaker 1: it absolutely says they do a lot. It's interesting because

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Speaker 1: it's also like the clip really illustrates the difference between

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Speaker 1: like the modern Republican and like what a politician used

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Speaker 1: to be. Like I could see a politician, like a

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Speaker 1: Republican early two thousands in the same scenario, like turning

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Speaker 1: into a joke but like saying it jokingly but meaning

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Speaker 1: it but like being able to pull it off. But

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Speaker 1: he like gets all huffy with the kids and like

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Speaker 1: he's like, dude, you're fucking stepdad. Ron sucks. The man

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Speaker 1: stressed out when he gets home from work and just

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Speaker 1: like takes it out on you. I mean, I wanted

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Speaker 1: to push right past this and get to the thing

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Speaker 1: everybody's really talking about. But uh, you know, can't you

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Speaker 1: you have to watch this clip, But we do want

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Speaker 1: to talk about the thing on everyone's mind. Uh, Coca

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Speaker 1: cola starlight versus pepsi nitro. Yeah, I think pepsi nitro.

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Speaker 1: I think sorry nitro pepsi ipsi. Whoops, sorry nitro pepsi.

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Speaker 1: Um yeah, everyone's got new things out. I think with

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Speaker 1: the pepsi one, i'm i'm i'm war inested in starlight

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Speaker 1: because I have no idea what the fun those words

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Speaker 1: mean when connected with Coca cola. But nitro pepsi is

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Speaker 1: basically nitrogen infused pepsi, you know, like Guinness or you know,

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Speaker 1: you see like nitro infused cold brewing ship like that. Um,

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Speaker 1: but that the rating or the review seemed to be

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Speaker 1: beyond lackless. Yeah. Yeah, the takeout nitro pepsi undermines the

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Speaker 1: purpose of soda, so there's just no fizz. You know.

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Speaker 1: That's like the Guinness is its own like uh, separate

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Speaker 1: beverage almost because it is tastes like a flat beer.

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Speaker 1: But it also tastes like you're drinking a loaf of

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Speaker 1: very um, very filling bread when you drink it. So

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Speaker 1: it's like there there's something there. It's to the experience.

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Speaker 1: That's why it's been around for over century. But like,

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Speaker 1: this is not what people I don't think want from soda. No,

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Speaker 1: but possibly I and I just get that out of

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Speaker 1: the way, because I just need you to tell me

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Speaker 1: about Starlight. Coca Cola. Now, this, on the other hand, friends,

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Speaker 1: is what not just we want from a soda, but

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Speaker 1: what we want from humankind. Uh. Coca Cola has released

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Speaker 1: a product called Starlight. It sounds like it seems like

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Speaker 1: these came out of similar marketing meetings where they're like,

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Speaker 1: we gotta like come up with the future of soda

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Speaker 1: because people are realizing that it's bad for you. Coca

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Speaker 1: Cola Starlight described thus lee. It's taste includes additional notes

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Speaker 1: reminiscent of star gazing around a campfire, as well as

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Speaker 1: a cooling sensation that evokes the feeling of a cold

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Speaker 1: journey to space. I added the question mark, um, so

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Speaker 1: what it tastes like wood ash? It's very very interesting,

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Speaker 1: Like you know, it seems like they're trying to be

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Speaker 1: impression is stic and like poetic. Let's be real, you're

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Speaker 1: selling a product that you don't need to do all

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Speaker 1: this with. I bought fucking gallons of Surge, uh, that

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Speaker 1: that green soda from the nineties, just because you had

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Speaker 1: a commercial where a bunch of teenagers out in the

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Speaker 1: streets being like such. And I was like, okay, good

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Speaker 1: enough for me. They used to know what they were doing,

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Speaker 1: but um, yeah, so they The person from the takeout

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Speaker 1: who reviewed it said it just tastes like cotton candy coke,

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Speaker 1: Like that's kind of the vibe. It's like got a

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Speaker 1: reddish color to it. Um has you know, cotton candy

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Speaker 1: when you eat it doesn't taste like this, but cotton

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Speaker 1: candy flavoring is usually like a less tart berry flavoring,

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Speaker 1: you know. And I don't know. He's like, it's not

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Speaker 1: it's not good. Yeah, certainly not the future of soda. Nay,

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Speaker 1: the human race. And can't we like accept in certain

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Speaker 1: arenas like we're we've hit peak this thing. Yeah, we

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Speaker 1: can gonna go past, so we can. Uh the that's

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Speaker 1: the that's the cool part of capitalism, Yeah, I mean,

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Speaker 1: like that's the future of bottled water. The Pepsi logo

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Speaker 1: redesign is a great example the like this, These products

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Speaker 1: that keep coming out that are like trying to invent

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Speaker 1: the next thing, like the number of i Q points

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Speaker 1: that are being not i Q points because i Q

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Speaker 1: test is fucking bullshit and problematic. But you know, people

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Speaker 1: who believe in the i Q test and think they

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Speaker 1: have a huge i Q probably people like the number

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Speaker 1: of Ivy League tuition dollars that are being pointed poured

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Speaker 1: into just like trying to sell people Pepsi and Coca

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Speaker 1: Cola products and just complete absence of any value to

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Speaker 1: society Like this always is just such a great example

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Speaker 1: of you know where where we went wrong? How you're

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Speaker 1: going wrong? Yeah, we're fucked anyway. This episode brought to

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Speaker 1: you by Nitro Pepsi. Yeah, it's actually really good, you

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Speaker 1: guys check it out. Actually really good. And the starlight

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Speaker 1: too pretty cool. It reminds me of a summer camp. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: it's I don't know if you've ever like had the

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Speaker 1: experience of drinking the actual fucking cosmos, but it's a

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Speaker 1: little bit like that. I have. I was on psilocybin though, right,

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Speaker 1: that's where I feel like that's the only way you

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Speaker 1: can go with ship like this, right, Like, most people

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Speaker 1: drink because they're thirsty, and all you give them is

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Speaker 1: a flavor. I wonder if Coca Cola starlight marks the

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Speaker 1: Sorry did I interrupt you, No, I'm just saying, add

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Speaker 1: psilocybin to this ship and then this might be the

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Speaker 1: future drinks. I wonder if Coca Cola starlight marks the

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Speaker 1: like advent of psychedelics, because like, now there there's a

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Speaker 1: bunch of articles and like magazines that you know, people

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Speaker 1: who like have you know, t T per centers read

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Speaker 1: that are about like how all the rich and like

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Speaker 1: cool people are doing psychedelics. Now. I wonder if this

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Speaker 1: is like we're starting to see the extremely whack result

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Speaker 1: of that is like just shitty, watered down like brands

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Speaker 1: of soda that like all those tech people who are

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Speaker 1: micro dosing in like this, we're on the other side

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Speaker 1: of that. And I like, and now this is what

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Speaker 1: they're coming up with, ladies and gentlemen, I give you quirdle.

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Speaker 1: Uh all right, well, those are the things that are

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Speaker 1: trending on this Wednesday afternoon. We're back tomorrow with a

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Speaker 1: whole episode of the show. Until then, be kind to

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Speaker 1: each other, be kind to yourselves, get the vaccine, don't

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Speaker 1: do nothing about white supremacy, and we will talk to

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Speaker 1: you all tomorrow. Bye bye, three