WEBVTT - "MY BOYFRIEND WORE MY THONG" 0:00:00.160 --> 0:00:03.480 The whole drive. I'm just crying. I'm sobbing the whole way. 0:00:03.960 --> 0:00:07.560 That's almost an hour drive, no music type of drive. 0:00:08.640 --> 0:00:11.560 So when I come home, I want to bend. 0:00:11.400 --> 0:00:14.880 To my boyfriend, you know. So I come home and 0:00:15.000 --> 0:00:17.279 I open I go to my bedroom because he's in there, 0:00:17.680 --> 0:00:19.520 and the first thing I see is him just. 0:00:19.680 --> 0:00:23.760 Laying in the bed faith down, asked so high. 0:00:24.520 --> 0:00:25.280 So you know, he's. 0:00:25.160 --> 0:00:30.280 Noticeable in one of my pink lace songs. And uh, 0:00:31.640 --> 0:00:34.080 I really don't know, man, we don't. We both just 0:00:34.080 --> 0:00:36.280 sort of look at each other. And I'm still sobbing 0:00:36.680 --> 0:00:38.200 because the day was just so ship. 0:00:38.880 --> 0:00:44.839 Georgia. Yes, yeah, Georgia. What's going on with you? 0:00:45.880 --> 0:00:46.280 Uh? 0:00:46.400 --> 0:00:47.800 Not a whole lot? 0:00:49.920 --> 0:00:52.000 What's your are you? You're in a car right now. 0:00:52.040 --> 0:00:53.159 I just heard a turn signal. 0:00:54.840 --> 0:00:57.280 Uh yes, I am actually. 0:00:57.640 --> 0:01:00.000 Where are we going? Are we turning right or left? 0:01:00.120 --> 0:01:00.880 That's what I want to know. 0:01:02.440 --> 0:01:04.280 I am actually turning left. 0:01:04.319 --> 0:01:06.000 I'm going home, going home. 0:01:07.040 --> 0:01:08.559 Okay, what's what's home? 0:01:10.880 --> 0:01:11.080 Home? 0:01:11.080 --> 0:01:12.920 In Oklahoma? 0:01:13.480 --> 0:01:15.800 Where are we coming from? 0:01:16.040 --> 0:01:18.920 We're coming from my boyfriend's work and McDonald's. He doesn't 0:01:18.959 --> 0:01:21.600 work at McDonald's. He works actually a piece of please. 0:01:22.040 --> 0:01:24.240 But I also wanted to get McDonald's. 0:01:24.480 --> 0:01:27.800 So you know, what'd you get at McDonald's. 0:01:29.200 --> 0:01:31.240 I got a cheese burger happy nail. 0:01:33.360 --> 0:01:37.400 I also do. I don't get mine with any onions 0:01:37.440 --> 0:01:39.080 or any pickles. 0:01:39.600 --> 0:01:40.600 I do get the pickles. 0:01:40.600 --> 0:01:44.080 Sometimes it really depends on my mood that day. 0:01:45.280 --> 0:01:47.640 Did you get a toy? What's the toy problem they 0:01:47.640 --> 0:01:48.160 got going on? 0:01:48.280 --> 0:01:48.440 Is it? 0:01:48.440 --> 0:01:48.880 Batman? 0:01:49.080 --> 0:01:52.680 You know, I haven't checked yet because I was too 0:01:52.720 --> 0:01:55.320 excited to like rush home, because I was nervous if 0:01:55.320 --> 0:01:57.640 you were going to answer before I got home, or. 0:01:57.640 --> 0:02:01.560 If I was still driving. But that ends up happening anywhere. 0:02:03.400 --> 0:02:05.480 By the way, your turn signal has been on the 0:02:05.640 --> 0:02:07.880 entire time we've been talking, and I'm are you did 0:02:07.880 --> 0:02:08.280 you make. 0:02:08.480 --> 0:02:11.400 No, I'm just now turning. I'm finally turning. Don't worry, 0:02:11.440 --> 0:02:12.320 it's about to turn off. 0:02:13.120 --> 0:02:15.480 Oh okay. You know, for a second, for a second, 0:02:15.560 --> 0:02:21.800 I thought you were just like taking aly long right turn. 0:02:22.120 --> 0:02:23.560 Oh wait, you said you're turning left. I thought would 0:02:23.560 --> 0:02:25.400 take a really long left turn. And then I and 0:02:25.440 --> 0:02:27.040 then it came to me, I was like, oh, I'm dumb. 0:02:27.080 --> 0:02:30.240 She's in the left lane waiting to turn. 0:02:30.400 --> 0:02:31.920 Yeah. 0:02:31.280 --> 0:02:34.399 But by the way, but if you're in. If you're 0:02:34.560 --> 0:02:37.080 in the left lane, do you really and do you 0:02:37.120 --> 0:02:40.840 really need a turn signal? Because everyone behind you is 0:02:40.880 --> 0:02:45.320 also turning left, so they and like just being being 0:02:45.480 --> 0:02:50.280 in the lane that itself signifies that you are turning left, 0:02:50.320 --> 0:02:51.880 So do you need to add a turn signal on 0:02:51.960 --> 0:02:52.440 top of it? 0:02:54.160 --> 0:02:57.080 I have actually had arguments with people, well, I want 0:02:57.080 --> 0:03:03.119 to say, arguments just over there. In my opinion, I 0:03:03.160 --> 0:03:05.880 think that the turn signal is there for you should 0:03:05.919 --> 0:03:08.000 just use it, Just use it just in case you 0:03:08.040 --> 0:03:11.080 never know. I mean, granted the point, it's true, but 0:03:11.240 --> 0:03:13.840 like I don't know. I've seen people do some function 0:03:14.080 --> 0:03:16.480 on the road and you can't trust their turn signals. 0:03:16.520 --> 0:03:18.640 They're not and they do some of their stuff. So it's 0:03:18.720 --> 0:03:22.200 just like, okay, just just follow the general guidelines and 0:03:22.280 --> 0:03:23.000 we're all cool. 0:03:23.919 --> 0:03:26.720 Georgia. It says here you one day came home from 0:03:26.760 --> 0:03:31.000 work crying, and then you when you got home you 0:03:31.120 --> 0:03:35.920 found your boyfriend face down, ass up, wearing one of 0:03:35.960 --> 0:03:39.200 your pink thongs, and then that and that made you 0:03:39.280 --> 0:03:42.440 feel worse. What tell me that story? 0:03:44.440 --> 0:03:48.440 So I used to work, uh, I mean, it doesn't 0:03:48.480 --> 0:03:50.720 really matter where you used to work, But I was 0:03:50.760 --> 0:03:53.720 having a terrible, terrible day at work. I used to 0:03:53.720 --> 0:03:58.000 cut in there and just at the place they wanted to. 0:03:58.120 --> 0:04:00.200 They wanted us to like cut so many people, and 0:04:00.240 --> 0:04:02.480 the men there were so rude. It was a barbershop 0:04:02.560 --> 0:04:06.840 takes place, and it was just terrible. So I'm coming home. 0:04:06.960 --> 0:04:10.320 The whole drive, I'm just crying. I'm sobbing the whole way. 0:04:10.800 --> 0:04:14.400 That's almost an hour drive, no music type of drive. 0:04:14.760 --> 0:04:18.640 That's it was terrible. So when I come home, I 0:04:18.680 --> 0:04:19.960 wanna bend. 0:04:20.000 --> 0:04:22.840 To my boyfriend, you know, because ship fav that's what 0:04:22.880 --> 0:04:28.960 you do. And so I come home and I open 0:04:29.080 --> 0:04:31.320 I go to my bedroom because he's in there, and 0:04:31.360 --> 0:04:33.159 the first thing I see is him just. 0:04:33.160 --> 0:04:38.080 Laying in the bed, face down, asked so high, so 0:04:38.200 --> 0:04:42.400 you know, he's noticeable in one of my pink lace songs. 0:04:43.240 --> 0:04:46.440 And I really don't know. 0:04:46.480 --> 0:04:47.040 Man, we don't. 0:04:47.120 --> 0:04:48.760 We both just sort of look at each other. And 0:04:48.800 --> 0:04:51.720 I'm still sobbing because the day was just so shit, 0:04:52.279 --> 0:04:56.280 and he's sort of just laying there awkwardly, and for 0:04:56.680 --> 0:04:58.240 I swear to god, it it felt like it was 0:04:58.320 --> 0:05:00.800 an hour. It was probably just thirty seconds. 0:05:00.839 --> 0:05:03.000 But eventually he, you know, suits up and he's like. 0:05:04.080 --> 0:05:06.880 I wanted to like make you laugh. 0:05:07.240 --> 0:05:10.200 I guess when you came home and I just kept. 0:05:10.000 --> 0:05:13.200 Crying and it was just really, really fucking awkward. He 0:05:13.240 --> 0:05:16.840 then was like consoling me and his in the song 0:05:16.960 --> 0:05:19.000 still his balls were hanging out and everything, and I 0:05:19.080 --> 0:05:22.080 was just crying. He was comforting me with it was 0:05:22.120 --> 0:05:22.719 a whole thing. 0:05:24.520 --> 0:05:27.840 Uh, you know, that's actually nice. So when I first 0:05:27.880 --> 0:05:31.599 read this, I thought it was I I didn't realize 0:05:31.640 --> 0:05:37.280 that he intentionally wanted to be walked in on in 0:05:37.320 --> 0:05:41.280 this position. I thought he was doing something discreet and 0:05:41.360 --> 0:05:44.119 you encountered upon him in the act. 0:05:46.080 --> 0:05:50.080 Nope, he uh, he likes to be seen doing these 0:05:50.279 --> 0:05:54.359 things for for shiitts and giggles. I guess he's I 0:05:54.360 --> 0:05:56.560 don't even know where he got the idea from. He 0:05:57.640 --> 0:06:00.720 I don't know, I think I honestly, I just don't know. 0:06:01.680 --> 0:06:06.680 And did you eventually find yourself amused by this once 0:06:06.720 --> 0:06:10.279 you calmed down or or I mean you said you 0:06:10.279 --> 0:06:12.040 said it made it it made it worse? 0:06:13.640 --> 0:06:15.720 Yeah, because you know, I was already having a bad 0:06:15.839 --> 0:06:17.760 day and I just wanted to talk to him about it, 0:06:17.800 --> 0:06:23.440 and just something about knowing that like his his I mean, 0:06:23.480 --> 0:06:25.719 he's a man you know, and sometimes men are like 0:06:25.839 --> 0:06:28.120 nasty and sweaty and shit, and like he was in 0:06:28.240 --> 0:06:30.680 my thong and I don't know something about his ball. 0:06:30.640 --> 0:06:31.520 Just being up in my phone. 0:06:31.640 --> 0:06:34.160 Just it was just a weird I was already having 0:06:34.200 --> 0:06:40.120 a bad day, so I see bad situations. But yeah, Honestly, 0:06:40.160 --> 0:06:42.480 after I had calmed down, though, we both laughed so 0:06:42.880 --> 0:06:45.760 fucking hard about it. We were talking about it last night. Actually, 0:06:46.240 --> 0:06:48.760 I told him that, uh, I was. 0:06:48.680 --> 0:06:51.800 Probably gonna potentially talk to you and tell you about this, 0:06:51.839 --> 0:06:53.000 and he was like, that's great. 0:06:53.360 --> 0:06:56.320 He says, it's the most embarrassing thing he ever had 0:06:56.320 --> 0:06:56.720 to deal with. 0:06:57.880 --> 0:07:01.320 I like that your boyfriend, and ten only puts himself 0:07:01.400 --> 0:07:05.600 in embarrassing situations. I think that there is a strong 0:07:05.920 --> 0:07:06.680 power in that. 0:07:08.120 --> 0:07:11.480 No, honestly, it's it's one of the he makes my 0:07:11.560 --> 0:07:15.680 life really amazing with that. I'm never bored with him ever. 0:07:18.040 --> 0:07:20.760 Matt. That's so great to hear, because I think a 0:07:20.760 --> 0:07:24.800 lot of people think, like, oh, if I'm doing this 0:07:24.880 --> 0:07:28.560 way or whatever, women won't like that. But here you are, 0:07:29.120 --> 0:07:34.840 this guy is in your thong, ass up, and you 0:07:34.840 --> 0:07:39.600 you're you're you enjoy that. It's a part of his whimsy. 0:07:41.360 --> 0:07:44.920 Oh, yeah, it's amazing. Truthfully, while in the moment, yeah, 0:07:44.920 --> 0:07:47.880 it was kind of shitty. It's it's it's fucking hilarious 0:07:47.880 --> 0:07:49.120 to look back up for sure. 0:07:50.960 --> 0:07:54.000 How long he has been dating for? 0:07:54.040 --> 0:07:55.239 About three years? 0:07:55.280 --> 0:07:55.640 Now? 0:07:56.480 --> 0:08:04.000 Three years? Wow? Is he with you right now? Oh no, yeah, okay, 0:08:04.120 --> 0:08:08.360 Well let me know. Uh, I'm wondering what he's probably 0:08:08.440 --> 0:08:11.800 like setting something up right now, like he's wearing one 0:08:11.840 --> 0:08:14.440 of your bras, or he's put one of your tampons 0:08:14.480 --> 0:08:16.880 in and you'll walk in through the door and he'll 0:08:16.880 --> 0:08:17.640 be spread eagle. 0:08:19.440 --> 0:08:21.720 That would be a you know, I hope so. 0:08:21.880 --> 0:08:23.360 And I'll update you all for sure. 0:08:23.280 --> 0:08:25.640 Update you or oh yes, oh yes, let us know. 0:08:25.680 --> 0:08:28.600 Thank you very much for calling Georgia untily. 0:08:28.720 --> 0:08:34.600 Thank you, Jacob, Yeah, Jacob, Jacob. 0:08:34.760 --> 0:08:40.839 It says here that you're having anxiety about whether or 0:08:40.920 --> 0:08:42.359 not you are an asshole. 0:08:45.520 --> 0:08:46.960 Yeah. 0:08:47.600 --> 0:08:49.800 Actually, a. 0:08:51.320 --> 0:08:54.520 Few weeks ago, I had a few drinks with some 0:08:54.679 --> 0:09:03.320 friends at a concert and uh, I made some I 0:09:03.360 --> 0:09:08.520 guess asshole has joked out loud and it seems like 0:09:08.520 --> 0:09:12.360 a few people heard and I said, out loud, am 0:09:12.440 --> 0:09:16.240 I a dick? And my friends started laughing, And I 0:09:16.800 --> 0:09:18.360 believe they think that I'm a dick. 0:09:19.880 --> 0:09:25.440 All right, So you make a joke, h then you 0:09:26.320 --> 0:09:29.080 second guess the joke. I wonder if you're an asshole, 0:09:29.720 --> 0:09:34.040 and then your friends laugh along, and that makes you 0:09:34.040 --> 0:09:35.080 think that you're an asshole. 0:09:37.000 --> 0:09:41.160 That's not I mean, that's when I started thinking about it. 0:09:41.200 --> 0:09:49.320 But now I okay, So I'm sorry, can't continue. 0:09:50.800 --> 0:09:56.800 I just feel like I'm micro analyzing my actions day 0:09:56.880 --> 0:10:01.840 to day and I guess the and take much micro analyzing. 0:10:01.920 --> 0:10:04.560 But I feel like I am a dick. 0:10:05.920 --> 0:10:07.240 Why do you feel like you're a dick. 0:10:09.720 --> 0:10:16.800 Well, I'm a delivery guy or a delivery company in 0:10:17.440 --> 0:10:24.800 the not so nice part of town here, and I 0:10:24.840 --> 0:10:27.679 don't have very good customer service skills. I've come to 0:10:27.760 --> 0:10:36.679 found or at least not now, but my road rage 0:10:36.720 --> 0:10:41.360 has gone up. If someone gives me attitude, I just 0:10:41.520 --> 0:10:43.439 don't I don't. 0:10:44.679 --> 0:10:44.880 Care. 0:10:45.360 --> 0:10:48.480 I just go off or I'll give him a finger. 0:10:49.559 --> 0:10:53.800 And all right, So, so you feel like you, as 0:10:53.840 --> 0:10:57.640 you've gotten older, have become more prone to anger. 0:11:00.160 --> 0:11:09.680 Maybe anger, yeah, bitterness, frustration Okay, I'd like soak like 0:11:10.200 --> 0:11:11.240 all day long. 0:11:12.000 --> 0:11:15.560 Yeah, so you're getting agitated. So you have a lot 0:11:15.880 --> 0:11:21.600 like of stimulus and variables coming in, do you feel 0:11:21.600 --> 0:11:26.800 like all this stimulus and variables are like going through 0:11:26.840 --> 0:11:30.880 you and then coming out of you in the form 0:11:30.960 --> 0:11:34.480 of assholeish behavior as defined by you. 0:11:36.880 --> 0:11:38.600 Yeah, that's not a bad way to put it yet. 0:11:39.559 --> 0:11:46.960 Okay, so do you let me ask you something. Do 0:11:47.000 --> 0:11:48.880 you care about whether or not you're an asshole? Do 0:11:48.920 --> 0:11:51.160 you desire not to be an asshole? 0:11:53.160 --> 0:11:53.360 Well? 0:11:53.440 --> 0:11:57.920 Yeah, well yeah, so this went hand in hand with 0:11:57.960 --> 0:12:00.800 some other thoughts that I've been having and just about 0:12:01.559 --> 0:12:04.120 why we're here and why this is all. 0:12:04.320 --> 0:12:07.559 Well well okay, well let's let's let's focus. I want 0:12:07.559 --> 0:12:09.120 to focus on one thing because if we get on 0:12:09.200 --> 0:12:14.600 other thoughts go crazy, We'll never you know. So all right, 0:12:14.720 --> 0:12:17.360 but why let me ask you? Let me ask you 0:12:17.679 --> 0:12:22.640 what what makes someone? Do you Do you desire to 0:12:22.640 --> 0:12:25.120 be actively good or you just desire not to be 0:12:25.200 --> 0:12:25.960 actively bad? 0:12:29.760 --> 0:12:29.840 No? 0:12:29.960 --> 0:12:32.800 I want to I want to be I want to 0:12:32.800 --> 0:12:35.880 be actively not bad if we have to all be 0:12:36.000 --> 0:12:37.200 in this world together. 0:12:38.480 --> 0:12:40.600 And yeah, that's not what I'm asking there, Like, do 0:12:40.640 --> 0:12:43.080 you want do you want to be actively good or 0:12:43.120 --> 0:12:46.800 do you just like want to cease this behavior that 0:12:46.880 --> 0:12:48.680 you say is being an asshole? 0:12:51.480 --> 0:12:52.559 No, I want to be good. 0:12:53.280 --> 0:12:55.920 Okay, let's I want to. I want to with you 0:12:56.000 --> 0:12:59.640 right now. I want to define what does it mean 0:13:00.160 --> 0:13:02.800 to be an asshole? Like do we even know or 0:13:02.840 --> 0:13:05.200 are we just like or are we just saying that, 0:13:05.840 --> 0:13:07.360 like we don't even know what we don't even know 0:13:07.400 --> 0:13:11.079 what that means? Being an asshole is just words? 0:13:11.160 --> 0:13:11.480 What is that? 0:13:11.520 --> 0:13:13.280 What does that actually mean? To be an asshole? 0:13:14.480 --> 0:13:21.560 Sure? So, I guess an asshole is someone who should 0:13:21.920 --> 0:13:27.240 affect the way a person is feeling and not care. 0:13:29.559 --> 0:13:35.320 Okay, an asshole, in your definition is somebody who negatively 0:13:35.360 --> 0:13:40.360 affects the way another person is feeling and doesn't care. 0:13:41.640 --> 0:13:48.520 Well yeah, uh. When is the last time you feel 0:13:48.520 --> 0:13:50.840 as though you negatively affected another person? 0:13:55.960 --> 0:13:56.200 Well? 0:13:59.280 --> 0:14:03.800 They but perhaps they negatively affected me? First? 0:14:05.360 --> 0:14:09.640 Jacob, Jacob, When is the last time you feel like 0:14:09.679 --> 0:14:11.360 you negatively affected another person? 0:14:12.720 --> 0:14:13.880 Today? 0:14:13.960 --> 0:14:18.079 Today? What happened today? 0:14:21.680 --> 0:14:25.320 I yelled at a lady at worked? 0:14:26.600 --> 0:14:30.160 Okay, you yelled at a lady at work? 0:14:31.480 --> 0:14:32.440 Yeah? 0:14:32.480 --> 0:14:33.560 Do you feel bad about that? 0:14:36.600 --> 0:14:37.560 Not so much? 0:14:38.760 --> 0:14:39.840 But there's a reason. 0:14:41.840 --> 0:14:47.200 Okay, all right, So yelled at lady at work and 0:14:47.240 --> 0:14:50.600 you don't feel bad about it, and you feel like 0:14:50.600 --> 0:14:55.160 you negative affected that lady? Hm, what was what's the reason? 0:14:57.240 --> 0:14:57.680 Her dog? 0:14:57.760 --> 0:14:58.440 Bit my hand. 0:14:59.480 --> 0:15:02.920 Her dog tod bit your hand, so you yell at her. 0:15:04.440 --> 0:15:07.120 I tried to handle the package and her dog jumped 0:15:07.160 --> 0:15:08.200 up and bit my hands. 0:15:09.960 --> 0:15:14.880 M hmm. Okay, what would you like to have done 0:15:14.880 --> 0:15:15.640 in that situation? 0:15:15.760 --> 0:15:19.080 If I had set the scene this this place is what? 0:15:19.680 --> 0:15:22.560 Jacob, Jacob, jac what would you like to have in 0:15:22.600 --> 0:15:23.080 that situation? 0:15:27.680 --> 0:15:27.800 Hm? 0:15:28.520 --> 0:15:31.560 I guess gotten in my car or my truck and left. 0:15:32.880 --> 0:15:38.080 But it's just hard to compose myself in those situations. 0:15:39.120 --> 0:15:41.360 Why is it hard to compose yourself in these situations? 0:15:42.560 --> 0:15:45.800 Because getting bit by someone's dog hurts, and they could 0:15:45.800 --> 0:15:46.560 have stopped the dog. 0:15:47.600 --> 0:15:53.280 Mm hmm. All right, I'm gonna tell you this is 0:15:53.320 --> 0:15:56.040 something like I've been reading a little bit about this. 0:15:57.200 --> 0:16:02.240 Look look at me. I've been reading you know, uh, 0:16:02.600 --> 0:16:07.280 you know, you know stoic philosophy. You ever heard about 0:16:07.280 --> 0:16:16.600 that Shitai? Yeah, basically like trying to have I'm not 0:16:16.720 --> 0:16:18.560 coming at this as a master of it. I'm just 0:16:18.640 --> 0:16:22.920 coming at this again as a thought exploration alongside you, 0:16:22.920 --> 0:16:28.680 you know, accepting things that we can't control. Right, this 0:16:28.840 --> 0:16:33.160 dog bit you, This dog bit you. You cannot control 0:16:34.200 --> 0:16:38.600 other people you can't control if somebody puts you off 0:16:38.600 --> 0:16:41.160 in traffic. He said, you have road rage. Can't control 0:16:41.200 --> 0:16:45.080 if a lady's dog bites you, but you can control 0:16:45.880 --> 0:16:49.520 how you act, and you desire. 0:16:50.560 --> 0:16:50.600 It. 0:16:50.720 --> 0:16:52.680 Seems it seems like you desire this, because if you 0:16:52.680 --> 0:16:54.720 didn't desire this, you wouldn't be calling me, we wouldn't 0:16:54.760 --> 0:16:59.160 be talking about this. So you do. You've bought Your 0:16:59.200 --> 0:17:05.480 actions are shoying. You desire to be cooler and calmer 0:17:05.520 --> 0:17:11.440 in these situations. Okay, So you can't control if the 0:17:11.520 --> 0:17:13.960 lady's dog bites you. You can't control if the guy's car 0:17:14.359 --> 0:17:16.080 hits you or cuts you off or whatever, but you 0:17:16.080 --> 0:17:20.280 can control how you act towards it. So if a 0:17:20.359 --> 0:17:25.600 lady's dog bites you, you have an opportunity. You look at 0:17:25.600 --> 0:17:28.520 it not as a bad thing. You look at it 0:17:28.600 --> 0:17:33.200 as an opportunity. You're get to retrain your brain. Here 0:17:33.880 --> 0:17:36.960 to go. Oh, a bad thing happened to me that 0:17:37.119 --> 0:17:41.920 was under no circumstances my control. Here's now an opportunity 0:17:43.359 --> 0:17:49.440 for me to work toward this thing I want by 0:17:50.480 --> 0:17:56.000 choosing not to care, by choosing not to yell at 0:17:56.040 --> 0:18:02.160 the lady, choosing not to get upset, because it's the 0:18:02.200 --> 0:18:07.600 most logical choice, right, Because the dog bit you that 0:18:07.840 --> 0:18:14.159 that already happened, So why would you not take that 0:18:14.280 --> 0:18:17.320 as an opportunity. It's like, logical, this isn't like this 0:18:17.400 --> 0:18:24.120 doesn't feel good, wholesome bullshit. This is like, yeah, legit, Logically, 0:18:26.080 --> 0:18:30.200 it is of your best interest to see it as 0:18:30.200 --> 0:18:36.080 an opportunity to work toward what you want, which is 0:18:36.720 --> 0:18:43.000 a greater control over your emotions. So take this bad 0:18:43.040 --> 0:18:48.560 thing that happened, decide to use it as an opportunity 0:18:49.119 --> 0:18:54.159 to not get upset. And dude, fucking you don't have 0:18:54.200 --> 0:18:58.840 to become a monk overnight. But like, next time, like 0:18:59.000 --> 0:19:07.280 some homework here, next time that happens, gain like be conscious, 0:19:07.680 --> 0:19:10.080 you know, because because because you're you're gonna you're gonna 0:19:10.080 --> 0:19:15.640 slip into your unconscious habit of getting pissed. Next time 0:19:15.680 --> 0:19:19.639 this happens, choose not to be upset about it. Choose 0:19:19.720 --> 0:19:23.760 to just get back into your car and see how 0:19:23.760 --> 0:19:29.680 that feels. Because once you've been able to consciously choose 0:19:29.720 --> 0:19:32.840 how you feel about a situation, once you then learn, 0:19:33.400 --> 0:19:37.080 oh shit, this is within my power, this is of 0:19:37.119 --> 0:19:41.600 my control, and maybe that'll make you feel empowered to 0:19:41.680 --> 0:19:45.720 keep acting in that direction. What do you think about 0:19:45.760 --> 0:19:46.119 all of that. 0:19:47.640 --> 0:19:54.280 I like that good advice. It's easy to get caught 0:19:54.359 --> 0:19:59.280 up in the moment, especially because I'm listening to you 0:19:59.400 --> 0:20:02.480 in my right year all day long while I'm driving, 0:20:03.480 --> 0:20:11.240 and uh yeah, sometimes it just seems to happen so fast. 0:20:11.960 --> 0:20:16.560 People are fucking crazy. They're definitely steel packages and down 0:20:16.600 --> 0:20:20.959 to get my fucking truck. Like they need to know 0:20:21.040 --> 0:20:22.520 that I'm not putting up with that shit. 0:20:22.640 --> 0:20:25.000 Why why do they need Why does anyone need to 0:20:25.040 --> 0:20:29.080 know anything? James, because James, could you have me, James, 0:20:29.080 --> 0:20:31.560 it's just that, James. This is like you're telling you're 0:20:31.720 --> 0:20:34.919 we're on the phone, you're telling me like the thesis 0:20:34.960 --> 0:20:36.760 of the reason why you called. I don't know. Maybe 0:20:36.800 --> 0:20:38.960 you called in just to tell me these stories, like 0:20:39.640 --> 0:20:42.199 just for fun, which is fine, I guess that's the 0:20:42.200 --> 0:20:45.720 whole point of this. But like it sounded to me 0:20:46.000 --> 0:20:52.400 like you you have a desire to like change your behavior. 0:20:52.400 --> 0:20:54.359 I don't know if you actually do. It's fine, by 0:20:54.359 --> 0:20:56.440 the way, by the way, it's fuck. It's fucking fine 0:20:56.480 --> 0:20:58.720 if you don't, like, you don't have to, so you 0:20:58.720 --> 0:21:02.480 can you can continue, you know, doing whatever it is 0:21:02.520 --> 0:21:04.480 you're doing. No one gives a ship, but I know 0:21:04.520 --> 0:21:05.760 if you do. I don't know if you do. You 0:21:05.800 --> 0:21:10.000 might not, but like, do do you do? You do 0:21:10.040 --> 0:21:11.840 you want to be a little bit calmer? 0:21:13.240 --> 0:21:14.480 Oh yeah for sure. 0:21:15.440 --> 0:21:21.359 Okay, next time, next time, next time, next time, something 0:21:21.440 --> 0:21:25.960 like that happens. Just like make the decision to take 0:21:26.000 --> 0:21:28.840 the path of least resistance and be calm about it. 0:21:29.440 --> 0:21:32.800 Just make that conscious decision, and if you do that enough, 0:21:32.800 --> 0:21:34.000 it'll become a happy. 0:21:35.840 --> 0:21:36.119 Word. 0:21:39.160 --> 0:21:42.000 James, Good luck to you, my friend. I'll talk to 0:21:42.040 --> 0:21:47.399 you soon. I love your gay I will damn dude. 0:21:47.680 --> 0:21:50.000 Oh yeah, no, iouly wasn't sure if I was going 0:21:50.040 --> 0:21:51.000 to actually connect with you. 0:21:51.880 --> 0:21:54.800 Well here we are. We've connected. Whatever that means. How 0:21:54.840 --> 0:21:58.959 are you doing, will, Yeah, I'm doing good. 0:21:59.040 --> 0:22:01.719 While Oh yeah, fucking uh? 0:22:01.840 --> 0:22:02.280 What's up? 0:22:02.320 --> 0:22:04.000 What's happening? What's cracking? 0:22:05.280 --> 0:22:07.440 Not much? Can I can? I read what it says here. 0:22:07.480 --> 0:22:11.800 It says here that you were homeless sleeping in a 0:22:11.880 --> 0:22:17.520 dumpster two years ago, but you have your life. I 0:22:17.920 --> 0:22:21.959 was behind a dumpster. That's a little bit n I mean, 0:22:22.000 --> 0:22:24.960 I mean that's a little bit nicer than in the dumpster. 0:22:28.640 --> 0:22:35.480 Yeah yeah, yeah, so you know I was probably I 0:22:35.520 --> 0:22:40.520 don't know, like eighteen at that point, and I'm like 0:22:40.560 --> 0:22:45.919 twenty one now, for reference, didn't necessarily have like a 0:22:46.000 --> 0:22:50.120 super troubled childhood or anything, but you know, got into 0:22:50.200 --> 0:22:53.439 drugs when I was like fourteen or fifteen, you know, 0:22:54.080 --> 0:22:56.200 started playing the drums in a punk band and on 0:22:56.359 --> 0:22:59.160 my nose pierced and all that jazz, and I was like, hell, yeah, 0:22:59.240 --> 0:23:03.360 let's you know, do a bunch of coke and speed 0:23:03.440 --> 0:23:08.080 and stuff. I guess, yeah, obviously got me into some trouble. 0:23:08.200 --> 0:23:11.320 So I got kicked out of my parents' house and 0:23:11.640 --> 0:23:15.560 got kicked out of school, wound up in the city nearby, Calgary. 0:23:16.680 --> 0:23:20.480 And yeah, it wasn't like I was sleeping behind a 0:23:20.560 --> 0:23:24.760 dumpster regularly, but I was couch hopping and whenever I 0:23:24.760 --> 0:23:27.680 couldn't find a place, I'd hop on down to seventh Tab. 0:23:27.760 --> 0:23:32.359 And so you had. 0:23:34.040 --> 0:23:36.120 You had a dumpster in particular that. 0:23:37.760 --> 0:23:40.240 Oh yeah, yeah, you know it was a spot. 0:23:40.640 --> 0:23:46.520 How did you find that spot and declare it as 0:23:46.960 --> 0:23:51.280 your spot? Did you like sort of go looking around 0:23:51.400 --> 0:23:53.800 or did you happen upon it. What's the story of 0:23:53.840 --> 0:23:54.919 how you found your spot? 0:23:56.480 --> 0:23:59.720 Honestly, it was just like I used to just check 0:23:59.760 --> 0:24:03.800 around with a couple of pairs of clothes and a 0:24:03.840 --> 0:24:08.800 blanket on my backpack. And this spot was not too 0:24:08.800 --> 0:24:12.080 far from one of the train stations downtown, so I 0:24:12.200 --> 0:24:16.720 was buying an W burger chain. So you know, I 0:24:16.760 --> 0:24:19.080 used to hang around to that burger chain with some 0:24:19.119 --> 0:24:23.199 of the other hoboes. And yeah, no, just you know, 0:24:23.240 --> 0:24:26.960 it's just right behind the ANW. Pretty pretty secure. There's 0:24:27.720 --> 0:24:32.080 like some kind of generator or heater or some shit nearby, 0:24:32.440 --> 0:24:35.520 so it was actually pretty warm in the winter. And 0:24:36.440 --> 0:24:38.800 did it's not too bad for being a burger chain. 0:24:39.880 --> 0:24:46.920 Oh yeah, yeah, like good beef at least. Yeah. Yeah, No, 0:24:47.000 --> 0:24:48.720 ANW is a good one. I wanted to ask you 0:24:48.760 --> 0:24:51.200