1 00:00:00,760 --> 00:00:05,840 Speaker 1: Hello there, Hi, So, how are you holding up? I'm 2 00:00:05,880 --> 00:00:09,520 Speaker 1: having you in there, you know, just locked in my parents. 3 00:00:09,520 --> 00:00:12,760 Speaker 1: How you just told me you've been wearing the same 4 00:00:12,840 --> 00:00:16,079 Speaker 1: sweatpants for four days straight as that? She said, well, no, 5 00:00:16,200 --> 00:00:19,320 Speaker 1: I mean pretty much since I got here today after Thanksgiving. 6 00:00:19,360 --> 00:00:22,400 Speaker 1: But my mom does laundry, like I mean, you would 7 00:00:22,440 --> 00:00:24,799 Speaker 1: think that this is a hotel that has, you know, 8 00:00:26,000 --> 00:00:28,400 Speaker 1: guess with sheets that need to be changed every day. 9 00:00:29,080 --> 00:00:32,360 Speaker 1: She's always like, bring down your towels and your dirty clothes. 10 00:00:32,400 --> 00:00:36,760 Speaker 1: I'm like, it's a pair of underwear and a T shirt. 11 00:00:37,360 --> 00:00:39,920 Speaker 1: That's what constitutes my dirty clothes. You know. Some people 12 00:00:39,960 --> 00:00:41,920 Speaker 1: like to keep up on that. My boyfriend does laundry 13 00:00:41,960 --> 00:00:45,239 Speaker 1: every day. Yeah, he does not like to let it 14 00:00:45,280 --> 00:00:47,760 Speaker 1: build up, so he just like he'll wash whatever is 15 00:00:47,760 --> 00:00:49,600 Speaker 1: in there that day. I mean, I think when you 16 00:00:49,600 --> 00:00:52,320 Speaker 1: have kids there's a little bit more, but yeah, it's 17 00:00:52,360 --> 00:00:54,400 Speaker 1: like every day or every other day. And at first 18 00:00:54,480 --> 00:00:57,560 Speaker 1: I was like, what the like, You're making yourself have 19 00:00:57,640 --> 00:00:59,960 Speaker 1: so much work. And now I'm kind of in the program, 20 00:01:00,000 --> 00:01:01,920 Speaker 1: Like I kind of like it. I'm still at my house, 21 00:01:02,000 --> 00:01:05,560 Speaker 1: like let's have stuck up a little bit. But it's 22 00:01:05,640 --> 00:01:08,360 Speaker 1: kind of nice sometimes because you just you don't have 23 00:01:08,440 --> 00:01:12,280 Speaker 1: to like go through so many clothes. Maybe I don't know. 24 00:01:12,360 --> 00:01:14,840 Speaker 1: Are you just like when you actually do laundry, the 25 00:01:14,920 --> 00:01:17,319 Speaker 1: actual session doesn't take as long, you know, Like I'm 26 00:01:17,400 --> 00:01:20,280 Speaker 1: usually like doing it for a couple of hours. Well, 27 00:01:20,319 --> 00:01:23,640 Speaker 1: you know, for me, I don't mind doing laundry. I 28 00:01:23,680 --> 00:01:28,120 Speaker 1: hate cold and laundry too. I don't have a good 29 00:01:28,120 --> 00:01:31,000 Speaker 1: TV show on or something. Yeah, it ends up just 30 00:01:31,040 --> 00:01:32,880 Speaker 1: a pile on my I've got a big island in 31 00:01:32,959 --> 00:01:36,440 Speaker 1: my kitchen, and it just ends up on island, like 32 00:01:36,880 --> 00:01:38,720 Speaker 1: on the end of the island. It's just a pile 33 00:01:38,840 --> 00:01:41,920 Speaker 1: and um. But there's nothing better than like having a 34 00:01:42,000 --> 00:01:44,560 Speaker 1: nice folded stack of laundry when you're done. So it's 35 00:01:44,560 --> 00:01:46,560 Speaker 1: like you need to like change the way that I 36 00:01:46,560 --> 00:01:49,160 Speaker 1: think about it. But amen to that. Well, maybe your 37 00:01:49,160 --> 00:01:51,440 Speaker 1: mom can do that for you over the holidays. Yeah, 38 00:01:51,600 --> 00:01:53,840 Speaker 1: I mean it would. What would help is if she 39 00:01:53,920 --> 00:01:57,240 Speaker 1: was like, do your own fucking laundry, right, because she 40 00:01:57,240 --> 00:01:59,960 Speaker 1: wouldn't let me like leave a pile laying around unfold 41 00:02:00,280 --> 00:02:03,800 Speaker 1: were right. Well, I have to tell you, I just 42 00:02:03,840 --> 00:02:06,600 Speaker 1: had the most funny conversation with an old friend of mine. 43 00:02:06,680 --> 00:02:10,840 Speaker 1: We were She called me I know. She called me Um, 44 00:02:11,360 --> 00:02:13,800 Speaker 1: and she works for a skincare company. So we were 45 00:02:13,800 --> 00:02:15,920 Speaker 1: talking about ways we could work together, like with velvets 46 00:02:16,000 --> 00:02:19,079 Speaker 1: Edge and her company and they have really amazing products. 47 00:02:19,120 --> 00:02:22,520 Speaker 1: And we had this like lengthy business conversation and then 48 00:02:22,560 --> 00:02:23,880 Speaker 1: so we were kind of at the end of it 49 00:02:23,919 --> 00:02:26,720 Speaker 1: and just catching up and she goes, and I have 50 00:02:26,880 --> 00:02:31,000 Speaker 1: to tell you congratulations on you and Chip. And I 51 00:02:31,040 --> 00:02:34,320 Speaker 1: was like, that's interesting, Like, I mean, I just thought 52 00:02:34,360 --> 00:02:36,560 Speaker 1: she like I was kind of confused by it, but 53 00:02:36,639 --> 00:02:40,280 Speaker 1: I literally just thought she must just think, like or 54 00:02:40,360 --> 00:02:42,440 Speaker 1: be looking at my Instagram or something and know that 55 00:02:42,440 --> 00:02:44,720 Speaker 1: the podcast is doing really well, and so she's like 56 00:02:44,760 --> 00:02:47,880 Speaker 1: congratulating me on that. Like I just was like yeah. 57 00:02:47,880 --> 00:02:49,680 Speaker 1: And she goes, you know, I no, Chip, like she 58 00:02:49,760 --> 00:02:52,320 Speaker 1: knows you from a couple of years ago and from 59 00:02:52,320 --> 00:02:55,000 Speaker 1: some work stuff too, and she was like I just 60 00:02:55,080 --> 00:02:58,119 Speaker 1: love him, Um, that's so great. And I was like, yeah, 61 00:02:58,200 --> 00:03:01,519 Speaker 1: he's Chips the best, Like he's so amazing, and we 62 00:03:01,680 --> 00:03:04,160 Speaker 1: just keep going on and on, right, and she goes 63 00:03:04,880 --> 00:03:07,640 Speaker 1: she said something and then I go wait what And 64 00:03:07,680 --> 00:03:13,800 Speaker 1: she goes, wait, you guys are dating, right, And I 65 00:03:13,880 --> 00:03:18,880 Speaker 1: was like what. No. I was like, Okay, I'm not 66 00:03:18,919 --> 00:03:25,040 Speaker 1: really his god died like the fact that she said 67 00:03:25,080 --> 00:03:27,079 Speaker 1: her and her husband even more like I mean, he's 68 00:03:27,080 --> 00:03:31,359 Speaker 1: different than her normal type. But like they really analyzed it. 69 00:03:31,440 --> 00:03:35,880 Speaker 1: They really analyzed our relationship because you know, I could 70 00:03:35,880 --> 00:03:39,400 Speaker 1: see like someone getting actually the name of your boyfriend 71 00:03:39,400 --> 00:03:45,800 Speaker 1: and me, um, yeah, I guess it's like once little names, 72 00:03:45,600 --> 00:03:54,480 Speaker 1: it's about it. But oh, I died. What did she 73 00:03:54,600 --> 00:03:57,200 Speaker 1: say that? We laughed forever and she was like I 74 00:03:57,240 --> 00:04:00,240 Speaker 1: feel like that grandmother that doesn't know what Facebook is, 75 00:04:00,440 --> 00:04:02,520 Speaker 1: you know, like she just could not get over it. 76 00:04:02,720 --> 00:04:05,440 Speaker 1: I guess it's like, truthfully, though, you're the only guy 77 00:04:05,480 --> 00:04:08,080 Speaker 1: I post about on my Instagram, So I guess people 78 00:04:08,240 --> 00:04:10,240 Speaker 1: here that like I'm in a relationship, and that would 79 00:04:10,280 --> 00:04:13,760 Speaker 1: be an easy assumption, you know, like strangers have asked 80 00:04:13,760 --> 00:04:16,960 Speaker 1: me that before, like is this the guy you're dating? 81 00:04:17,040 --> 00:04:20,560 Speaker 1: Like on the Instagram? But no, like, no one I know. 82 00:04:21,520 --> 00:04:28,240 Speaker 1: Oh my god, So yeah, you're the serious boyfriend. Well 83 00:04:28,360 --> 00:04:30,320 Speaker 1: you're gonna have to work with your sexy voice now, 84 00:04:30,480 --> 00:04:36,840 Speaker 1: you know. Damn, I'm gonna keep keep it up. I'm 85 00:04:36,880 --> 00:04:39,039 Speaker 1: not gonna be allowed at your house because you know, 86 00:04:39,160 --> 00:04:45,080 Speaker 1: your real boyfriend's gonna get suspicious. I'm sure it's like, 87 00:04:45,320 --> 00:04:50,440 Speaker 1: are you guys recording? Are you recording? Yeah, I gotta 88 00:04:50,480 --> 00:04:53,080 Speaker 1: record a podcast later. And he's like, I bet you do. 89 00:04:54,720 --> 00:04:59,840 Speaker 1: Standing outside my window. Anyway, it gave me great pleasure today. 90 00:04:59,839 --> 00:05:02,040 Speaker 1: I and I laughed thoroughly, and then I just started 91 00:05:02,120 --> 00:05:04,599 Speaker 1: laughing thinking about you and I in a relationship. Oh 92 00:05:04,640 --> 00:05:06,960 Speaker 1: my god, I'm dating. I feel like you would murder 93 00:05:07,040 --> 00:05:09,400 Speaker 1: me for some reason. Oh, I don't think I would 94 00:05:09,520 --> 00:05:15,120 Speaker 1: murder you. Don't you think. I mean, you only have 95 00:05:15,720 --> 00:05:19,320 Speaker 1: your friends, literally only have three things of hummics, no 96 00:05:19,560 --> 00:05:23,760 Speaker 1: crackers on the diet. I wish that I could say 97 00:05:23,800 --> 00:05:25,880 Speaker 1: my refridgerator got better. It did for like a week, 98 00:05:25,960 --> 00:05:28,960 Speaker 1: and then now I'm back to nothing. Oh my god. 99 00:05:29,000 --> 00:05:31,360 Speaker 1: It's like the exact opposite here at my parents house, 100 00:05:31,440 --> 00:05:35,680 Speaker 1: Like I don't know how she finds my mom finds 101 00:05:35,680 --> 00:05:38,800 Speaker 1: things in the fridge because it is so much. I'm like, 102 00:05:39,400 --> 00:05:42,320 Speaker 1: I'm craving a pickle. I'm like, it is the biggest 103 00:05:42,320 --> 00:05:46,240 Speaker 1: game of tetris you've ever played, just to give the 104 00:05:46,240 --> 00:05:50,039 Speaker 1: pickle jar out. Yeah, it's not fun. And I just 105 00:05:50,480 --> 00:05:52,440 Speaker 1: I don't know, and I don't know, like because I'm 106 00:05:52,480 --> 00:05:55,800 Speaker 1: really weird about leftovers. I don't like to eat leftovers, 107 00:05:55,920 --> 00:05:59,640 Speaker 1: And I wonder if it's some sort of like PTSD. 108 00:06:00,000 --> 00:06:05,240 Speaker 1: It could be from my childhood, like not knowing how 109 00:06:05,279 --> 00:06:09,320 Speaker 1: old the ship in the fridge was because of she 110 00:06:09,680 --> 00:06:14,000 Speaker 1: has containers for everything. Yeah yeah, so it's like God 111 00:06:14,040 --> 00:06:16,640 Speaker 1: knows how old the ship is. So I'm really weird 112 00:06:16,680 --> 00:06:19,760 Speaker 1: about the eating leftovers now. Isn't it so funny how 113 00:06:19,800 --> 00:06:23,080 Speaker 1: we overcompensate because actually, as you speaking, like my boyfriend 114 00:06:23,080 --> 00:06:26,000 Speaker 1: says the same thing about his mom, like they grew 115 00:06:26,080 --> 00:06:27,520 Speaker 1: up just and he would be like, I don't know 116 00:06:27,560 --> 00:06:30,440 Speaker 1: how old that that dressing is like, or that mayonnaise, 117 00:06:30,480 --> 00:06:32,039 Speaker 1: Like I'd have to check the dates because she would 118 00:06:32,080 --> 00:06:33,720 Speaker 1: have she would go to Costco and just have so 119 00:06:33,839 --> 00:06:36,440 Speaker 1: much stuff in there or whatever. I guess I took it. 120 00:06:37,000 --> 00:06:42,279 Speaker 1: I took for granted how um organized and clean my 121 00:06:42,360 --> 00:06:45,280 Speaker 1: mom was growing up because I didn't really even know 122 00:06:45,400 --> 00:06:47,839 Speaker 1: that there was anything different. But like he now is 123 00:06:47,960 --> 00:06:51,240 Speaker 1: super neat, he hates clutter. He never really like he 124 00:06:51,720 --> 00:06:54,000 Speaker 1: goes to the grocery leg you know, on the daily, 125 00:06:54,279 --> 00:06:57,400 Speaker 1: versus like stalking it for the week. And so I 126 00:06:57,440 --> 00:07:00,880 Speaker 1: wonder if it's like we we just overcompensate for whatever 127 00:07:00,920 --> 00:07:04,479 Speaker 1: it was that we didn't like as a child totally. Yeah. 128 00:07:05,040 --> 00:07:06,719 Speaker 1: I was making a salad the other day with some 129 00:07:06,800 --> 00:07:09,720 Speaker 1: like baby spinach, and I was like there were parts 130 00:07:09,720 --> 00:07:11,880 Speaker 1: of it that, like, you know, when spinach starts to 131 00:07:11,880 --> 00:07:14,840 Speaker 1: go bad, it just looks like it's like been soaked 132 00:07:14,880 --> 00:07:18,200 Speaker 1: in water. And I was like this this feels and 133 00:07:18,200 --> 00:07:20,720 Speaker 1: my mom's like here and it to me, and she 134 00:07:20,840 --> 00:07:23,560 Speaker 1: like feels off the piece of the leaf and then 135 00:07:23,600 --> 00:07:25,760 Speaker 1: like throws the gross part away and like throws the 136 00:07:25,840 --> 00:07:29,080 Speaker 1: like rest on my plate parts. Fine, just watch it 137 00:07:29,120 --> 00:07:33,880 Speaker 1: off and oh my gosh. Yeah, I mean it's just 138 00:07:34,080 --> 00:07:36,120 Speaker 1: it's just a different like look. I think too. When 139 00:07:36,120 --> 00:07:38,480 Speaker 1: they grew up, it was like I was gonna make 140 00:07:38,520 --> 00:07:40,200 Speaker 1: them sound so old, but it was like coming out 141 00:07:40,240 --> 00:07:43,680 Speaker 1: of the depression era. And he didn't throws it away 142 00:07:43,840 --> 00:07:48,200 Speaker 1: likely um, and me, I'm just like this smells a 143 00:07:48,240 --> 00:07:50,600 Speaker 1: little off. I'm gonna just throw it all way. Well. 144 00:07:50,600 --> 00:07:53,360 Speaker 1: I actually I did a podcast with a financial guy 145 00:07:53,480 --> 00:07:55,520 Speaker 1: a couple of weeks ago, and his name is Daniel 146 00:07:55,520 --> 00:07:57,560 Speaker 1: Bark and he's amazing, and he was talking about that 147 00:07:57,600 --> 00:08:02,760 Speaker 1: about how the programming from older generations, um, because of 148 00:08:02,800 --> 00:08:06,040 Speaker 1: the depression, you know, like they don't erase those memories. 149 00:08:06,080 --> 00:08:09,160 Speaker 1: So even though they're not living in the same capacity 150 00:08:09,240 --> 00:08:12,840 Speaker 1: that they were, their mentality is still like save or 151 00:08:12,880 --> 00:08:15,720 Speaker 1: like you don't waste food or you know, things like that. 152 00:08:15,800 --> 00:08:17,240 Speaker 1: And he was saying, he was like, I think it's 153 00:08:17,240 --> 00:08:20,800 Speaker 1: gonna be really interesting after COVID to see what our 154 00:08:20,840 --> 00:08:24,640 Speaker 1: messages are because like, you know, like I financially, that's 155 00:08:24,640 --> 00:08:26,440 Speaker 1: a big thing. I think we were all kind of 156 00:08:26,440 --> 00:08:28,440 Speaker 1: living or I know, I was like, the last couple 157 00:08:28,480 --> 00:08:31,239 Speaker 1: of years have been great for me financially, and so 158 00:08:32,120 --> 00:08:35,120 Speaker 1: it really rocked me when COVID hit and our industry 159 00:08:35,160 --> 00:08:39,240 Speaker 1: basically disappeared overnight, and I'm like, oh my god, you know, 160 00:08:39,320 --> 00:08:42,640 Speaker 1: like there's no guarantees anymore, and you really don't ever 161 00:08:42,760 --> 00:08:45,520 Speaker 1: have that, but that security that we had, I think 162 00:08:45,559 --> 00:08:49,040 Speaker 1: a lot of us have been rocked, and I'm curious 163 00:08:49,080 --> 00:08:52,520 Speaker 1: after COVID, Like, you know, definitely now I'm so glad 164 00:08:52,559 --> 00:08:54,839 Speaker 1: I have a savings account and like I will never 165 00:08:54,960 --> 00:08:58,880 Speaker 1: not live in that mindset anymore because of the experience 166 00:08:58,880 --> 00:09:04,360 Speaker 1: we've had. Totally. Yeah, it's um, I m my my. 167 00:09:04,360 --> 00:09:06,600 Speaker 1: My mom has always been like I was making fun 168 00:09:06,640 --> 00:09:09,160 Speaker 1: of her today because like, you know, I'm here for 169 00:09:09,200 --> 00:09:10,559 Speaker 1: a month, so I didn't want to just feel like 170 00:09:10,600 --> 00:09:13,080 Speaker 1: I was living out of the suitcase. UM, so I 171 00:09:13,120 --> 00:09:16,400 Speaker 1: wanted to unpack and put stuff into the dresser in 172 00:09:16,440 --> 00:09:19,480 Speaker 1: my room. But I mean, there's she is saved ship, 173 00:09:19,800 --> 00:09:21,920 Speaker 1: I said to I was like, there are enough like 174 00:09:22,600 --> 00:09:24,720 Speaker 1: hand towels in this house to clean up the next 175 00:09:24,840 --> 00:09:29,760 Speaker 1: X time ald spilled, Like my dresser is full of 176 00:09:29,800 --> 00:09:32,000 Speaker 1: like we call them tea towels, but just like you 177 00:09:32,000 --> 00:09:34,160 Speaker 1: know what you would use like a kitchen rag kind 178 00:09:34,160 --> 00:09:37,760 Speaker 1: of what why do do you need to fill drawers 179 00:09:37,880 --> 00:09:41,000 Speaker 1: in my bedroom of this ship? It's so fine. You're 180 00:09:41,000 --> 00:09:43,120 Speaker 1: not running up here when you spill something in the 181 00:09:43,200 --> 00:09:45,120 Speaker 1: kitchen to be like, oh I need one more of those. 182 00:09:45,280 --> 00:09:47,640 Speaker 1: Maybe she is you never know, maybe she's spill too 183 00:09:47,720 --> 00:09:51,160 Speaker 1: much tea. I found I found a two thousand twelve calendar, 184 00:09:51,360 --> 00:09:56,160 Speaker 1: and now that I meant a two thousand, two thousand two, 185 00:09:56,240 --> 00:10:02,120 Speaker 1: sorry eighteen years. God. I was cleaning a cabinet the 186 00:10:02,160 --> 00:10:06,160 Speaker 1: other day and I found, UM, I found cat medicine 187 00:10:06,640 --> 00:10:10,240 Speaker 1: from the year two thousand nine. So wow, maybe that's 188 00:10:10,240 --> 00:10:12,760 Speaker 1: what you should make your project. While you're there clean 189 00:10:13,600 --> 00:10:15,960 Speaker 1: you can she can do your laundry, You can help her, 190 00:10:16,320 --> 00:10:19,800 Speaker 1: um declutter. You can Maricondo that ship? Yeah, that's what 191 00:10:19,840 --> 00:10:23,520 Speaker 1: I should get her, that Maricondo book for Christmas. You're like, 192 00:10:24,040 --> 00:10:29,920 Speaker 1: merry Christmas. That's like. Remember when I was in college, 193 00:10:30,040 --> 00:10:32,800 Speaker 1: my mom gave me a financial book and it was 194 00:10:32,880 --> 00:10:35,360 Speaker 1: like it was like a self help book and a 195 00:10:35,400 --> 00:10:39,200 Speaker 1: financial book for Christmas. And I was like, jeez, things 196 00:10:39,440 --> 00:10:45,680 Speaker 1: mom to tell me. Damn. Anyway, all right, let's get 197 00:10:45,720 --> 00:10:48,360 Speaker 1: to it. Um. I got into her email and we 198 00:10:48,400 --> 00:10:51,559 Speaker 1: have a couple we're going to go through today. Uh. 199 00:10:51,600 --> 00:10:55,240 Speaker 1: This one is in reference to what we talked about 200 00:10:55,400 --> 00:10:59,080 Speaker 1: last week about the S t I S. Do you 201 00:10:59,080 --> 00:11:03,680 Speaker 1: remember the conversation was basically that it was at middle aged, 202 00:11:03,920 --> 00:11:07,600 Speaker 1: like forty five to fifty five or that age range 203 00:11:07,679 --> 00:11:11,040 Speaker 1: kind of is the number of S t I S 204 00:11:11,280 --> 00:11:16,040 Speaker 1: is growing incredibly high, and it's just it just keeps going. 205 00:11:16,120 --> 00:11:18,040 Speaker 1: And they're saying it's because a lot of people are 206 00:11:18,040 --> 00:11:21,319 Speaker 1: getting out of long term relationships and not really understanding 207 00:11:21,360 --> 00:11:24,199 Speaker 1: the new dating world, and so they're just passing. I mean, 208 00:11:24,240 --> 00:11:26,480 Speaker 1: I keep wanting to say STDs, but we learned last 209 00:11:26,520 --> 00:11:30,520 Speaker 1: week that they're now called uh S t I S infections, 210 00:11:30,640 --> 00:11:33,120 Speaker 1: not disease. So this is this is called I got 211 00:11:33,160 --> 00:11:37,240 Speaker 1: an incurable s t I from my boyfriend, she says. Hi, 212 00:11:37,400 --> 00:11:39,800 Speaker 1: Kelly and Chip I listened in on this week's podcast 213 00:11:39,840 --> 00:11:43,120 Speaker 1: about STI transmission. That ship happened to me. I had 214 00:11:43,160 --> 00:11:45,679 Speaker 1: the same boyfriend my entire life and married him, but 215 00:11:45,720 --> 00:11:49,400 Speaker 1: got divorced about three years ago after a sixteen year relationship. 216 00:11:49,720 --> 00:11:52,520 Speaker 1: I began seeing a co worker, not someone who works 217 00:11:52,559 --> 00:11:54,280 Speaker 1: with me, with someone who works at the same place. 218 00:11:54,360 --> 00:11:57,360 Speaker 1: I do spoiler, we are still together. We started having 219 00:11:57,440 --> 00:12:00,720 Speaker 1: sex a few weeks into dating in an entire year. Later, 220 00:12:00,960 --> 00:12:04,840 Speaker 1: the day before my birthday, he tells me he wants 221 00:12:04,880 --> 00:12:07,000 Speaker 1: to talk and that he has herpies and has had 222 00:12:07,040 --> 00:12:10,160 Speaker 1: it since he was a teenager. We did use protection 223 00:12:10,160 --> 00:12:13,559 Speaker 1: early on, but after we became exclusive, we stopped. I 224 00:12:13,600 --> 00:12:15,920 Speaker 1: was devastated that he didn't tell me before we ever 225 00:12:16,000 --> 00:12:19,160 Speaker 1: had sex. Long story short, I now have herpies too, 226 00:12:19,360 --> 00:12:22,240 Speaker 1: and as you know, it's for life. The worst part 227 00:12:22,360 --> 00:12:25,520 Speaker 1: is is that I'm still harboring some resentment towards him 228 00:12:25,520 --> 00:12:28,680 Speaker 1: for not telling me and protecting me or damn allowing 229 00:12:28,720 --> 00:12:31,680 Speaker 1: me to protect myself. I mean, most days I'm fine 230 00:12:31,720 --> 00:12:34,000 Speaker 1: and I don't think about it, but this week's podcast 231 00:12:34,000 --> 00:12:36,520 Speaker 1: brought those feelings to the surface and they are real. 232 00:12:37,040 --> 00:12:39,199 Speaker 1: I mean, what do I do? I already have it, 233 00:12:39,320 --> 00:12:41,800 Speaker 1: so now we both do. I guess it takes away 234 00:12:41,840 --> 00:12:43,959 Speaker 1: the awkwardness of having to date and tell another guy 235 00:12:44,000 --> 00:12:47,760 Speaker 1: I have the herb full disclosure. I love the guy now. 236 00:12:47,960 --> 00:12:49,640 Speaker 1: But what if I had known about this before we 237 00:12:49,679 --> 00:12:52,200 Speaker 1: got down and dirty, would we be together? I wonder 238 00:12:52,520 --> 00:12:56,600 Speaker 1: what are your thoughts? Oh god, yeah, I mean it's 239 00:12:56,679 --> 00:12:58,560 Speaker 1: like I don't know how I would react to that, 240 00:12:58,679 --> 00:13:02,120 Speaker 1: because yeah, it's like my initial knee jerk reaction would 241 00:13:02,120 --> 00:13:07,840 Speaker 1: be just like bye, yeah, you know, because it's like 242 00:13:07,880 --> 00:13:11,000 Speaker 1: a daylight and a dollar short, like I do think 243 00:13:11,040 --> 00:13:15,440 Speaker 1: he did her dirty, Like I think that that. Unfortunately, 244 00:13:15,679 --> 00:13:18,120 Speaker 1: if you do find yourself in that position, is something 245 00:13:18,120 --> 00:13:21,360 Speaker 1: that needs to be disclosed before you have sex, because 246 00:13:21,400 --> 00:13:25,880 Speaker 1: if not, you're like starting your relationship with you know, 247 00:13:26,000 --> 00:13:30,120 Speaker 1: like lies basically like you're starting your foundation is not 248 00:13:30,200 --> 00:13:34,440 Speaker 1: even truthful, and so without that transparency, it would be 249 00:13:34,480 --> 00:13:42,360 Speaker 1: hard to like build a trusting, fully fully transparent relationship. Yeah, 250 00:13:42,679 --> 00:13:46,640 Speaker 1: and now there's a there's like resentment has been injected 251 00:13:46,640 --> 00:13:51,480 Speaker 1: into the relationship, so it's like, you know, the smallest 252 00:13:51,520 --> 00:13:56,200 Speaker 1: of argument you can grow go back to, like and 253 00:13:56,200 --> 00:13:59,400 Speaker 1: then you gave me herpes, right, you know what I mean, 254 00:13:59,480 --> 00:14:03,319 Speaker 1: It's like you can't win anything, like from his position, 255 00:14:03,440 --> 00:14:07,960 Speaker 1: you know what a major funk up. Like like a 256 00:14:08,080 --> 00:14:12,200 Speaker 1: year later, I'm like, WHOA. I think it would be 257 00:14:12,320 --> 00:14:15,160 Speaker 1: very difficult to tell someone that, especially if you really 258 00:14:15,240 --> 00:14:17,520 Speaker 1: liked them, because then you'd be scared that they would 259 00:14:17,600 --> 00:14:22,040 Speaker 1: be like by those are the that's a consequence of 260 00:14:22,080 --> 00:14:25,320 Speaker 1: like S T I S you know. And it's and 261 00:14:25,360 --> 00:14:29,200 Speaker 1: I don't mean to like I'm not sort of shaming anybody, 262 00:14:29,240 --> 00:14:32,240 Speaker 1: but because a lot of people end up getting them 263 00:14:32,400 --> 00:14:35,520 Speaker 1: in situations exactly like this. When she decides, if she 264 00:14:35,600 --> 00:14:39,680 Speaker 1: decides to move on, when she meets another sexual partner, 265 00:14:40,000 --> 00:14:44,000 Speaker 1: it is her responsibility now to be like, hey there's 266 00:14:44,040 --> 00:14:46,680 Speaker 1: something I need to tell you, and it's really fucking embarrassing, 267 00:14:47,200 --> 00:14:50,320 Speaker 1: but I have this and I wish I didn't and 268 00:14:50,400 --> 00:14:52,960 Speaker 1: it was completely out of my control that I got it, 269 00:14:53,280 --> 00:14:55,480 Speaker 1: but it is what it is. So it's like then 270 00:14:55,640 --> 00:14:58,960 Speaker 1: at least, like give somebody the opportunity to be like, Okay, 271 00:14:58,960 --> 00:15:01,360 Speaker 1: well I'm gonna do whatever I needed you to protect myself. 272 00:15:02,680 --> 00:15:05,800 Speaker 1: I mean it's this, it's it goes with like I mean, 273 00:15:05,800 --> 00:15:08,560 Speaker 1: there are people that are HIV positive, that are on 274 00:15:08,680 --> 00:15:11,880 Speaker 1: drugs that are make them nondetectable. That's still I mean 275 00:15:11,920 --> 00:15:14,920 Speaker 1: they have to say I'm HIV positive, I'm nondetectable. But 276 00:15:15,040 --> 00:15:18,200 Speaker 1: you have to like it's it's just part of being 277 00:15:18,240 --> 00:15:22,720 Speaker 1: a responsible adult. Yeah, I mean, you're not man enough 278 00:15:22,760 --> 00:15:26,760 Speaker 1: to like fucking say that in the beginning. How what's 279 00:15:26,880 --> 00:15:29,720 Speaker 1: how is he going to like deal with any other 280 00:15:29,840 --> 00:15:35,280 Speaker 1: sort of uncomfortable situations or conversations in a relationship. Well, 281 00:15:35,320 --> 00:15:37,440 Speaker 1: I think that's what it brings up, right, Like the 282 00:15:37,760 --> 00:15:40,280 Speaker 1: fact that he wasn't honest and especially for such a 283 00:15:40,320 --> 00:15:44,040 Speaker 1: long time that they assume we're having sex. I mean, 284 00:15:44,040 --> 00:15:46,840 Speaker 1: he's putting her at risk without her her knowing it, 285 00:15:47,080 --> 00:15:50,080 Speaker 1: and obviously she ended up getting it. So it was 286 00:15:50,560 --> 00:15:54,440 Speaker 1: a serious situation, and um, she wasn't allowed to make 287 00:15:54,440 --> 00:15:56,600 Speaker 1: the decision for herself. And so it's like, if you could, 288 00:15:56,680 --> 00:15:59,720 Speaker 1: it feels very disrespectful to me in a lot of ways. 289 00:15:59,760 --> 00:16:02,800 Speaker 1: And it's like, if you could disrespect me on that level, 290 00:16:02,840 --> 00:16:05,400 Speaker 1: like what else, Like that's where my head goes always. 291 00:16:05,440 --> 00:16:08,880 Speaker 1: It's like like that's why you know, I mean, like 292 00:16:08,960 --> 00:16:12,600 Speaker 1: I have friends who we've had this conversation recently. Actually, 293 00:16:12,640 --> 00:16:16,640 Speaker 1: I have a friend who told a mistruth. But now 294 00:16:17,120 --> 00:16:19,400 Speaker 1: she's like dug herself into this place and she's like, 295 00:16:19,440 --> 00:16:20,840 Speaker 1: you know, but it's like it's not that big of 296 00:16:20,880 --> 00:16:24,520 Speaker 1: a deal, so let's just like leave it as is, 297 00:16:24,760 --> 00:16:27,280 Speaker 1: and let's not like like I don't need to like 298 00:16:27,360 --> 00:16:29,400 Speaker 1: go back and correct it because like it doesn't matter, 299 00:16:29,440 --> 00:16:31,840 Speaker 1: it's irrelevant. And like if I go back now, then 300 00:16:31,840 --> 00:16:33,720 Speaker 1: I have to say I was lying. But I'm like, 301 00:16:33,800 --> 00:16:37,960 Speaker 1: but if you're lying and they find out, it makes 302 00:16:37,960 --> 00:16:40,400 Speaker 1: it into a bigger issue, you know. And I just 303 00:16:40,440 --> 00:16:42,840 Speaker 1: think that, like we get ourselves in these holes sometimes 304 00:16:42,840 --> 00:16:45,600 Speaker 1: where because we don't want to be adults or because 305 00:16:45,640 --> 00:16:49,040 Speaker 1: we don't want to own up to being imperfect or human, um, 306 00:16:49,560 --> 00:16:55,040 Speaker 1: we back ourselves into these corners that end up causing resentments, mistrust, 307 00:16:55,480 --> 00:16:57,680 Speaker 1: like all of these bigger issues, when if you could 308 00:16:57,760 --> 00:17:02,120 Speaker 1: just be honest and try to have a conversation, seems 309 00:17:02,160 --> 00:17:05,320 Speaker 1: like the outcome might be better. Yeah, sometimes in the 310 00:17:05,400 --> 00:17:07,560 Speaker 1: in the in the moment, like a little white lie 311 00:17:07,800 --> 00:17:12,359 Speaker 1: or a the end of the truth assion or on 312 00:17:12,440 --> 00:17:16,080 Speaker 1: a mission of the truth, like is right in that moment. 313 00:17:16,480 --> 00:17:19,719 Speaker 1: But what you can't ever predict in that moment, is 314 00:17:20,760 --> 00:17:24,919 Speaker 1: um something coming up that like sheds new light on 315 00:17:25,000 --> 00:17:28,280 Speaker 1: what you said, and then you're like, whoa what I 316 00:17:28,400 --> 00:17:32,240 Speaker 1: met was? And so I look, I think it's just always, 317 00:17:32,880 --> 00:17:39,919 Speaker 1: especially when it affects somebody else. Yeah, it's like it 318 00:17:40,000 --> 00:17:44,680 Speaker 1: is incredibly selfish to just go for the poon. You know, Yeah, 319 00:17:45,840 --> 00:17:51,720 Speaker 1: what were you thinking, dude? I mean, just thinking about 320 00:17:51,720 --> 00:17:54,919 Speaker 1: getting some action. That's the truth. And I'm sure he 321 00:17:55,000 --> 00:17:58,240 Speaker 1: really really likes this this girl or now it sounds 322 00:17:58,280 --> 00:18:00,679 Speaker 1: like maybe they're even more serious than just like, but 323 00:18:01,560 --> 00:18:03,680 Speaker 1: I think it's hard. I think it is super hard 324 00:18:03,720 --> 00:18:06,720 Speaker 1: to authentically be ourselves and own all of our faults, 325 00:18:06,800 --> 00:18:08,280 Speaker 1: Like I know it is for me, and I think 326 00:18:08,280 --> 00:18:11,280 Speaker 1: it is for everyone else, but especially when it comes 327 00:18:11,280 --> 00:18:15,600 Speaker 1: to health, I always advocate for the truth. So I 328 00:18:15,680 --> 00:18:21,280 Speaker 1: understand her resentment. Uh, Samantha, Hopefully you can um get 329 00:18:21,320 --> 00:18:22,840 Speaker 1: to a better place and I hope you guys can 330 00:18:22,880 --> 00:18:25,040 Speaker 1: have a conversation and I hope that he owns up 331 00:18:25,080 --> 00:18:31,639 Speaker 1: to like that. That was a huge, huge funk up. Okay, 332 00:18:31,960 --> 00:18:41,600 Speaker 1: good one. Okay, this one comes from Claudia. She says, Hi, 333 00:18:41,760 --> 00:18:46,720 Speaker 1: Kelly and Chip, maybe it is your mom. Let's see, 334 00:18:47,040 --> 00:18:49,399 Speaker 1: she says. Love the podcast Thank you so much for 335 00:18:49,480 --> 00:18:51,640 Speaker 1: keeping it real and funny. I'm hoping that you can 336 00:18:51,680 --> 00:18:54,239 Speaker 1: help with an issue that I've been dealing with that 337 00:18:54,359 --> 00:18:56,960 Speaker 1: seems to have only gotten worse in quarantine. I have 338 00:18:57,000 --> 00:19:00,480 Speaker 1: a neighbor who has really loud sex a end at 339 00:19:00,520 --> 00:19:03,840 Speaker 1: all hours of the day. She goes through draft wells. 340 00:19:03,840 --> 00:19:07,800 Speaker 1: So it's not a constant nuance, no nuisance, sorry, but 341 00:19:07,920 --> 00:19:10,520 Speaker 1: recently it's been pretty consistent and it's causing me to 342 00:19:10,640 --> 00:19:14,440 Speaker 1: lose sleep, and occasionally I'm worried that my coworkers might 343 00:19:14,480 --> 00:19:16,760 Speaker 1: hear it when I'm on calls her zooms and think 344 00:19:16,800 --> 00:19:23,639 Speaker 1: I have porn playing in the background, dying. What do? 345 00:19:24,040 --> 00:19:29,879 Speaker 1: What do you suggest I do? Join in? Knock on 346 00:19:29,920 --> 00:19:33,520 Speaker 1: the window with a bottle of wine. That's like a 347 00:19:33,560 --> 00:19:36,320 Speaker 1: Sex in the City episode. I feel like Samantha does that, 348 00:19:36,359 --> 00:19:39,480 Speaker 1: Like she somehow gets involved in a threesome because she's 349 00:19:39,480 --> 00:19:41,280 Speaker 1: been on the other side of the wall and she's 350 00:19:41,280 --> 00:19:43,920 Speaker 1: been masturbating when these people are having sex next door 351 00:19:44,000 --> 00:19:47,520 Speaker 1: or something. It's pretty funny. Actually, that's funny. You know. 352 00:19:47,600 --> 00:19:50,560 Speaker 1: I lived in New York for six years and it 353 00:19:50,680 --> 00:19:52,960 Speaker 1: was one of the things that, like I full on 354 00:19:53,119 --> 00:19:56,200 Speaker 1: was like, all right, I'm you know, bringing on neighbors. 355 00:19:56,280 --> 00:19:58,560 Speaker 1: I'm gonna see people naked in their windows. I'm gonna 356 00:19:58,560 --> 00:20:01,760 Speaker 1: hear like loud sex all that time, just because everyone's 357 00:20:01,800 --> 00:20:03,320 Speaker 1: living on top of each other and a lot of 358 00:20:03,320 --> 00:20:06,560 Speaker 1: the buildings are so old and retrofitted in the walls 359 00:20:06,560 --> 00:20:09,959 Speaker 1: and the floors. And did you mean I think? I 360 00:20:10,000 --> 00:20:12,439 Speaker 1: think there was like two nights that I heard people fucking. 361 00:20:12,440 --> 00:20:19,040 Speaker 1: It was so sad, like, like I know, I wanted 362 00:20:19,080 --> 00:20:21,560 Speaker 1: to hear it, Like, look, I guess I should be 363 00:20:21,560 --> 00:20:23,680 Speaker 1: thankful that I was never like just kept up by 364 00:20:23,760 --> 00:20:26,600 Speaker 1: like you know, loud moaning for hours and hours and hours. 365 00:20:26,680 --> 00:20:29,840 Speaker 1: But it sounds like Claudia has got an issue that 366 00:20:30,200 --> 00:20:34,000 Speaker 1: she needs to deal with. I've never had the issue 367 00:20:34,000 --> 00:20:37,240 Speaker 1: at a place I've lived, but definitely like a hotel situation, 368 00:20:37,280 --> 00:20:40,879 Speaker 1: I've experienced this, right, I've had that happen at a 369 00:20:40,960 --> 00:20:42,679 Speaker 1: hotel too. I think it's pretty hot when you hear 370 00:20:42,680 --> 00:20:48,080 Speaker 1: it in an hotel. Well, look, I'm not into being 371 00:20:48,119 --> 00:20:50,199 Speaker 1: kept up all night, and I'm certainly not into my 372 00:20:50,240 --> 00:20:53,960 Speaker 1: coworkers thinking I'm listening to like horn playing in the background, 373 00:20:54,640 --> 00:20:58,280 Speaker 1: like if I'm on a zoom call um. But I did. 374 00:20:58,520 --> 00:21:01,680 Speaker 1: I just pulled up an article in Psychology Today that 375 00:21:01,800 --> 00:21:04,280 Speaker 1: has like ten things that you can do if your 376 00:21:04,280 --> 00:21:08,960 Speaker 1: neighbors are having wild sex. UM. It says the number 377 00:21:08,960 --> 00:21:11,639 Speaker 1: one is remember that you're not alone. People live in 378 00:21:11,720 --> 00:21:15,479 Speaker 1: close orders. UM. It just means that, like there's probably 379 00:21:15,520 --> 00:21:17,320 Speaker 1: a lot of people that this is happening to in 380 00:21:17,320 --> 00:21:21,399 Speaker 1: your building, so that you're not alone. It's the number 381 00:21:21,400 --> 00:21:25,840 Speaker 1: two is know that it's natural for you to feel embarrassed. UM. 382 00:21:26,560 --> 00:21:32,720 Speaker 1: So what's funny is is like I think that um 383 00:21:32,840 --> 00:21:35,840 Speaker 1: says your embarrassment maybe directly related to how mortified you'd 384 00:21:35,840 --> 00:21:38,760 Speaker 1: be if you discovered that you've been overheard. So there's 385 00:21:38,800 --> 00:21:43,879 Speaker 1: like an inherent like like why why is why is 386 00:21:43,880 --> 00:21:46,320 Speaker 1: there any qual to me? For Claudie, it's like it's 387 00:21:46,320 --> 00:21:50,439 Speaker 1: almost like the fact that she is like what do 388 00:21:50,520 --> 00:21:53,200 Speaker 1: I do? It shows that there's like a little embarrassment. 389 00:21:53,240 --> 00:21:57,040 Speaker 1: Like if you're if your neighbor was like constantly parking 390 00:21:57,080 --> 00:22:00,640 Speaker 1: your parking spot or leaving trash outside or you would 391 00:22:00,640 --> 00:22:03,960 Speaker 1: be like stop doing that, you know, like you wouldn't 392 00:22:04,000 --> 00:22:06,680 Speaker 1: be like what do I do? But there is like 393 00:22:07,640 --> 00:22:09,600 Speaker 1: I mean, what if you knock on your neighbor's store 394 00:22:09,600 --> 00:22:11,679 Speaker 1: and you're like, um, your sex is keeping me up. 395 00:22:11,720 --> 00:22:14,520 Speaker 1: And she's like, I can hear you farting all the time, 396 00:22:14,960 --> 00:22:17,400 Speaker 1: or you know what I mean, like they just come 397 00:22:17,440 --> 00:22:22,240 Speaker 1: back or like like I haven't heard you. You know, Um, 398 00:22:22,720 --> 00:22:27,520 Speaker 1: give people the benefit of the doubt. Um, except that 399 00:22:27,560 --> 00:22:29,840 Speaker 1: it's normal to be turned on when you hear sex 400 00:22:30,240 --> 00:22:32,959 Speaker 1: sex noises. So this one says your brain is wired 401 00:22:33,000 --> 00:22:38,720 Speaker 1: to mirror neurons, which makes you automatically um intimately would 402 00:22:38,720 --> 00:22:43,000 Speaker 1: which make you automatically imitate the psychology, actions and emotions 403 00:22:43,040 --> 00:22:47,560 Speaker 1: of others. They yawned, you law you yawn. They're aroused. 404 00:22:47,760 --> 00:22:52,600 Speaker 1: You're aroused. You're not a burb. Yeah that's interesting. So, um, 405 00:22:52,720 --> 00:22:55,919 Speaker 1: she didn't touch on that. So I wonder if, um, 406 00:22:55,960 --> 00:22:59,040 Speaker 1: you know, there's a part of her that's like actually 407 00:22:59,119 --> 00:23:03,160 Speaker 1: enjoys listening. Well, I think it's like anytime. I mean, 408 00:23:03,240 --> 00:23:07,720 Speaker 1: I've read some articles about different things like that. I 409 00:23:07,720 --> 00:23:10,240 Speaker 1: can't remember exactly what the topic is, but it's how 410 00:23:10,359 --> 00:23:15,680 Speaker 1: you associate the feelings of that. So like, if you're 411 00:23:15,760 --> 00:23:19,040 Speaker 1: hearing other people like moan and grown and like really 412 00:23:19,040 --> 00:23:22,119 Speaker 1: get into it, you've probably been in a situation like that, 413 00:23:22,160 --> 00:23:24,560 Speaker 1: and so you take yourself into that place. And so 414 00:23:24,640 --> 00:23:26,199 Speaker 1: then of course it would turn you on because like, 415 00:23:26,240 --> 00:23:29,600 Speaker 1: you know how it feels and it feels good. Yeah, 416 00:23:30,359 --> 00:23:34,080 Speaker 1: makes sense to me totally. Then the next number five 417 00:23:34,200 --> 00:23:37,840 Speaker 1: is to keep perspective. You know. It basically says you 418 00:23:37,840 --> 00:23:39,919 Speaker 1: have to acknowledge that sex as normal and pleasure role 419 00:23:39,960 --> 00:23:42,680 Speaker 1: and it's an act of love. It could be worse. 420 00:23:42,720 --> 00:23:44,119 Speaker 1: You could have a neighbor that has a dog that 421 00:23:44,160 --> 00:23:47,000 Speaker 1: barks all day. I mean, I agree with I would 422 00:23:47,119 --> 00:23:50,640 Speaker 1: so much rather listen to people have sex. Yeah. Um, 423 00:23:51,040 --> 00:23:53,040 Speaker 1: you also know it's like a limited amount of time 424 00:23:53,280 --> 00:23:55,920 Speaker 1: to it's you know, a dog barking all day while 425 00:23:55,960 --> 00:23:59,840 Speaker 1: they're gone is an all day thing. Um. Number six 426 00:23:59,880 --> 00:24:02,960 Speaker 1: is asked him, asked them to change, and we asked 427 00:24:02,960 --> 00:24:06,080 Speaker 1: them to change their ways. Um. It says, you know, 428 00:24:06,160 --> 00:24:08,520 Speaker 1: you can write a note, you can intervene, you can 429 00:24:08,600 --> 00:24:11,880 Speaker 1: say something in the mailbox. But I remember that fly. 430 00:24:12,320 --> 00:24:15,639 Speaker 1: You catch more flies with honey than vinegar. Um, but 431 00:24:16,480 --> 00:24:19,480 Speaker 1: that last part and you catch more flies with honey 432 00:24:19,520 --> 00:24:22,959 Speaker 1: than vinegar. So be sweet about you know you fu 433 00:24:23,119 --> 00:24:26,200 Speaker 1: too loud? Shut up right right right right okay, Um, 434 00:24:26,800 --> 00:24:32,159 Speaker 1: just like cry mag magmack o, Hey, neighbor, here's some muffins, 435 00:24:32,520 --> 00:24:35,400 Speaker 1: just to let you know. That I can hear you 436 00:24:35,480 --> 00:24:40,720 Speaker 1: having sex, which totally thinking. I'm totally fine. I heard 437 00:24:40,760 --> 00:24:45,800 Speaker 1: you're getting pounded all night last night. I just want 438 00:24:45,840 --> 00:24:52,720 Speaker 1: to yeah. Yeah, I was about to say, you bring 439 00:24:52,760 --> 00:24:56,800 Speaker 1: over some sort of cream. Yeah. Um. The other things 440 00:24:56,800 --> 00:25:00,400 Speaker 1: has changed your ways, so it's like, you know, by 441 00:25:00,480 --> 00:25:06,280 Speaker 1: a sound machine, vacuum, yeah, airplugs, noise canceling air plugs, 442 00:25:06,320 --> 00:25:10,560 Speaker 1: things like that. Headphones, yeah, lest outside intervention. You can 443 00:25:10,600 --> 00:25:13,920 Speaker 1: ask your apartment complex manager to say something. And even so, 444 00:25:14,080 --> 00:25:16,600 Speaker 1: some people resort to calling the police, but this should 445 00:25:16,600 --> 00:25:21,959 Speaker 1: be allow. So aggressive loud sex is not exactly an 446 00:25:22,000 --> 00:25:26,000 Speaker 1: emergency unless you're chronically to distressed, sleep depride or think 447 00:25:26,040 --> 00:25:29,040 Speaker 1: that someone safety. I mean, that's ridiculous, like nine on one, 448 00:25:29,119 --> 00:25:31,800 Speaker 1: what's your emergency? I'm sorry, but my neighbors are having 449 00:25:31,800 --> 00:25:35,679 Speaker 1: sex a way too loud, Like that's very ridiculous. I 450 00:25:35,760 --> 00:25:39,159 Speaker 1: really want people don't tie up emergency phone lines with 451 00:25:39,280 --> 00:25:42,679 Speaker 1: that kind of bullshit. Right, I'm going the cops. The 452 00:25:42,720 --> 00:25:45,280 Speaker 1: cops have better things to deal with. I mean, they 453 00:25:45,280 --> 00:25:49,520 Speaker 1: probably would love to deal with that situation, but I 454 00:25:49,560 --> 00:25:51,320 Speaker 1: mean that would be more exciting than some of the 455 00:25:51,359 --> 00:25:53,800 Speaker 1: stuff they have to do. Hey, you know what if 456 00:25:53,800 --> 00:25:56,600 Speaker 1: you're if your neighbors are having loud sex, call at casual, 457 00:25:58,200 --> 00:26:02,880 Speaker 1: record it, we'll play it. Oh my god, we're about 458 00:26:02,880 --> 00:26:11,800 Speaker 1: to start getting some Number nine. Number nine is contemplate this. 459 00:26:12,080 --> 00:26:17,600 Speaker 1: Do you have loud sex? Well, right, judge Jon, And 460 00:26:17,640 --> 00:26:21,560 Speaker 1: the last one is alternatively embraced the loud sex. That's 461 00:26:21,560 --> 00:26:24,520 Speaker 1: what you said. I mean why, I mean, just get 462 00:26:24,520 --> 00:26:30,359 Speaker 1: out your vibrator, Claudia. Let's see what happens. Yeah, my attorney. Yeah, 463 00:26:30,440 --> 00:26:33,800 Speaker 1: and y'ell back, yell back back at you, like you know, 464 00:26:33,920 --> 00:26:36,960 Speaker 1: calling your your boyfriend or your girlfriend or ever, get 465 00:26:37,000 --> 00:26:40,640 Speaker 1: you off and have loud sex right back at them. Well, 466 00:26:40,680 --> 00:26:43,160 Speaker 1: I do think it's like you could make a joke 467 00:26:43,200 --> 00:26:46,119 Speaker 1: about it, like be like what up, guys, and like 468 00:26:46,160 --> 00:26:48,280 Speaker 1: if they can hear you, they're probably going to tone 469 00:26:48,280 --> 00:26:51,160 Speaker 1: it down a little bit, you know, like if they realize, oh, ship, 470 00:26:51,359 --> 00:26:54,399 Speaker 1: we just heard her through the wall. Um. But I 471 00:26:54,440 --> 00:26:57,080 Speaker 1: think my suggestion was going to be get a sound machine, 472 00:26:57,080 --> 00:26:59,080 Speaker 1: because that's what I do in hotels, Like you just 473 00:26:59,119 --> 00:27:01,119 Speaker 1: crank that ship up up and you can't hear anything 474 00:27:01,119 --> 00:27:02,960 Speaker 1: anymore if you need to go to sleep or whatever. 475 00:27:03,800 --> 00:27:06,520 Speaker 1: But yeah, I mean, I don't know. I think there's 476 00:27:06,560 --> 00:27:10,040 Speaker 1: worst problems. To be honest, I do understand the zoom calls. 477 00:27:10,119 --> 00:27:13,560 Speaker 1: I mean, this girl sounds like she's getting getting a lot. 478 00:27:13,600 --> 00:27:17,919 Speaker 1: Oh my god, good for her. You live in that 479 00:27:18,000 --> 00:27:21,560 Speaker 1: quarantine dream. Yeah, I think, Claudia. Our advice is get 480 00:27:21,640 --> 00:27:24,720 Speaker 1: us invest in a nice sound machine, or just join in, 481 00:27:25,560 --> 00:27:33,119 Speaker 1: or a vibe writer, a casual. All right. This last 482 00:27:33,119 --> 00:27:35,800 Speaker 1: one comes from Jenny, and it's about gift giving. Obviously 483 00:27:35,840 --> 00:27:39,119 Speaker 1: we're a minute, Wait a minute, how does how j 484 00:27:39,440 --> 00:27:44,879 Speaker 1: E in? Okay? Because that's Jenny, I would say Jenny 485 00:27:44,920 --> 00:27:47,720 Speaker 1: for that. Jenny is my sister saying g I N 486 00:27:47,840 --> 00:27:52,800 Speaker 1: N Y, And I thought, oh my god, how weird, Like, no, 487 00:27:53,000 --> 00:27:55,919 Speaker 1: it's Jenny, but this is a different name spelling for 488 00:27:56,000 --> 00:28:00,119 Speaker 1: Jenny j E N and I but Jenny. So this 489 00:28:00,240 --> 00:28:02,840 Speaker 1: is Christmas season, obviously, so there's a lot of gift 490 00:28:02,880 --> 00:28:05,840 Speaker 1: giving going around, and she has a question about it. 491 00:28:05,880 --> 00:28:08,240 Speaker 1: She said, I love and hate gifts. I love getting 492 00:28:08,280 --> 00:28:11,320 Speaker 1: gifts for people randomly, and if I see what I 493 00:28:11,359 --> 00:28:13,720 Speaker 1: think is the perfect gift for someone that I just 494 00:28:13,840 --> 00:28:15,960 Speaker 1: get it and give the gift, not for a birthday 495 00:28:16,040 --> 00:28:19,160 Speaker 1: or celebration of a holiday, but just because I hate 496 00:28:19,200 --> 00:28:21,800 Speaker 1: giving gifts for people on a schedule, and normally I 497 00:28:21,840 --> 00:28:24,000 Speaker 1: can avoid it with friends and family, but this year 498 00:28:24,000 --> 00:28:26,760 Speaker 1: I got myself a boyfriend and yep, he comes with 499 00:28:26,800 --> 00:28:30,840 Speaker 1: the family, his parents, his sister, and brother in law. 500 00:28:31,119 --> 00:28:33,480 Speaker 1: I was talking to my girlfriend about this anxiety of 501 00:28:33,520 --> 00:28:36,200 Speaker 1: getting gifts, and she just chugged her wand she mentioned 502 00:28:36,240 --> 00:28:39,120 Speaker 1: that her ex used to complain about the unevenness of 503 00:28:39,120 --> 00:28:42,160 Speaker 1: their gifts, as in, he spent more than her. As 504 00:28:42,280 --> 00:28:44,840 Speaker 1: ungrateful as that seems, and as much as I love 505 00:28:44,920 --> 00:28:46,800 Speaker 1: my girlfriend, I feel that there's a little bit of 506 00:28:46,840 --> 00:28:49,320 Speaker 1: truth in that sentiment. It has nothing to do with 507 00:28:49,400 --> 00:28:53,560 Speaker 1: economic status. I totally get lived living within your means. Plus, 508 00:28:53,600 --> 00:28:56,920 Speaker 1: like they say, it's the thought that counts. But if 509 00:28:56,960 --> 00:28:59,560 Speaker 1: I get him an autographed football and he just gets 510 00:28:59,560 --> 00:29:01,880 Speaker 1: me a path back of my favorite candy, then yeah, 511 00:29:02,240 --> 00:29:05,640 Speaker 1: seems a little weird and off. It seems awkward to 512 00:29:05,680 --> 00:29:08,360 Speaker 1: talk about a cap and even more so, what do 513 00:29:08,400 --> 00:29:11,600 Speaker 1: I cap it for? His family? Is our first holiday 514 00:29:11,600 --> 00:29:14,040 Speaker 1: together and I hate to make an impression with a 515 00:29:14,040 --> 00:29:17,600 Speaker 1: half bait gift with a cheap or two expensive price tag. 516 00:29:18,000 --> 00:29:21,080 Speaker 1: Plus I don't know them very well. Apparently they already 517 00:29:21,080 --> 00:29:23,640 Speaker 1: got me gifts to help. I know people are going 518 00:29:23,680 --> 00:29:26,440 Speaker 1: to tell me I'm overthinking it. Believe me, I want 519 00:29:26,560 --> 00:29:32,920 Speaker 1: to act casual. What do you think, Chip, Well, Um, 520 00:29:33,120 --> 00:29:35,360 Speaker 1: there's a few things to sort of unpack here, the 521 00:29:36,200 --> 00:29:40,640 Speaker 1: sort of equality and gifts. Um, that's a really tough 522 00:29:40,680 --> 00:29:45,560 Speaker 1: thing because often like the more creative and thoughtful gift, 523 00:29:47,200 --> 00:29:51,000 Speaker 1: the cheaper it can be. Yeah, if you know, someone 524 00:29:51,200 --> 00:29:54,120 Speaker 1: is like a huge Joe Montana fan and you're like, 525 00:29:54,160 --> 00:29:58,520 Speaker 1: I'm gonna get the autograph football like what a decade? 526 00:29:59,600 --> 00:30:03,960 Speaker 1: Like God, But so then you go back to the 527 00:30:04,040 --> 00:30:14,000 Speaker 1: first football player of all times, right yeah, yeah, sports ball. 528 00:30:14,680 --> 00:30:20,520 Speaker 1: But anyway, like I was saying, sorry, if if, if 529 00:30:20,920 --> 00:30:22,800 Speaker 1: a lot of thought would go into being like, oh 530 00:30:22,840 --> 00:30:25,840 Speaker 1: he loves this, I'm gonna get this person to autograph this. 531 00:30:26,160 --> 00:30:28,960 Speaker 1: So there's like legwork and it might not necessarily be 532 00:30:29,080 --> 00:30:31,520 Speaker 1: I mean that might cost you, but like it might 533 00:30:31,560 --> 00:30:34,680 Speaker 1: not necessarily be expensive, but there's like thought and heart 534 00:30:34,760 --> 00:30:37,680 Speaker 1: and work that goes into it, which makes it more 535 00:30:37,840 --> 00:30:42,000 Speaker 1: valuable totally. You know, you and I both have a 536 00:30:42,040 --> 00:30:45,000 Speaker 1: friend that like buys us the greatest gifts ever and 537 00:30:45,040 --> 00:30:50,240 Speaker 1: she's like impossible to buy for um. Yeah, and it's um, 538 00:30:50,280 --> 00:30:53,440 Speaker 1: you know, it can be very stressful, but like last year, 539 00:30:53,600 --> 00:30:58,160 Speaker 1: like I fucking nailed both her birthday and it wasn't 540 00:30:58,280 --> 00:31:01,800 Speaker 1: like I wasn't breaking the bank to do it. So, um, 541 00:31:01,840 --> 00:31:05,040 Speaker 1: you know, sometimes it's I look, I stressed about gifts 542 00:31:05,040 --> 00:31:07,840 Speaker 1: buying too, and I hate it when I feel forced 543 00:31:07,880 --> 00:31:10,080 Speaker 1: to do it. I love to buy something when I'm 544 00:31:10,120 --> 00:31:14,240 Speaker 1: like this is perfect for that yeah, yeah, yeah, or 545 00:31:14,320 --> 00:31:17,360 Speaker 1: if you have the idea like luckily, like you know, 546 00:31:17,400 --> 00:31:19,800 Speaker 1: I feel like even with your your microphone, it was 547 00:31:19,880 --> 00:31:22,719 Speaker 1: like I felt like I had a great idea fortune 548 00:31:22,760 --> 00:31:26,320 Speaker 1: to do and you know, but like those ideas don't 549 00:31:26,400 --> 00:31:29,440 Speaker 1: hit every time, you know, so it can be really stressful. 550 00:31:30,160 --> 00:31:32,800 Speaker 1: Then you have to buy for people that you don't 551 00:31:32,920 --> 00:31:36,440 Speaker 1: know very well. Actually stresses me out. That's really hard 552 00:31:36,480 --> 00:31:42,200 Speaker 1: because you could buy a really fucking nice, expensive candle, um, 553 00:31:42,360 --> 00:31:45,520 Speaker 1: and I think that it's like, well it's at least 554 00:31:45,560 --> 00:31:47,360 Speaker 1: it's a nice gift. But then it's like, but you 555 00:31:47,440 --> 00:31:50,520 Speaker 1: bought me a candle, you know what I mean, Like, which, look, 556 00:31:50,560 --> 00:31:54,000 Speaker 1: I love a nice candle, but it also feels like 557 00:31:54,080 --> 00:31:56,000 Speaker 1: something that had no thought put into it, you know. 558 00:31:56,120 --> 00:32:01,040 Speaker 1: So it's that's a really stressful position to be in. Um. 559 00:32:01,080 --> 00:32:03,760 Speaker 1: You know, I think too, like you could pick. If 560 00:32:03,760 --> 00:32:07,640 Speaker 1: you know anything about the family or something or something 561 00:32:07,640 --> 00:32:09,720 Speaker 1: about their like ideals or what's important to them, you 562 00:32:09,720 --> 00:32:14,320 Speaker 1: can always donate to a charity that idea their family belief. 563 00:32:14,520 --> 00:32:17,600 Speaker 1: You know, a certain amount for each person and then 564 00:32:18,120 --> 00:32:19,760 Speaker 1: you know, give them a card that says that you 565 00:32:19,840 --> 00:32:23,120 Speaker 1: did that, um, because then it's not something that's material, 566 00:32:23,360 --> 00:32:26,640 Speaker 1: it's actually like a feel good sort of gift. Yeah, 567 00:32:26,680 --> 00:32:30,120 Speaker 1: I'm with you. I think thoughtful gifts are always more, um, 568 00:32:30,480 --> 00:32:33,760 Speaker 1: I appreciate them more than like I think as adults, 569 00:32:33,800 --> 00:32:36,200 Speaker 1: it's sort of like you have your own money, you 570 00:32:36,240 --> 00:32:38,120 Speaker 1: kind of buy what you want to buy or save 571 00:32:38,240 --> 00:32:40,280 Speaker 1: for what you want to buy, and you know, whatever 572 00:32:40,320 --> 00:32:43,000 Speaker 1: that looks like in your life. But like when someone 573 00:32:43,040 --> 00:32:45,800 Speaker 1: puts a lot of thought into something, it's like it 574 00:32:45,920 --> 00:32:48,520 Speaker 1: just means more and it actually is, you know, the 575 00:32:48,560 --> 00:32:51,360 Speaker 1: most important gift and it could be twenty dollars or something. 576 00:32:51,600 --> 00:32:55,640 Speaker 1: But the question about the cap. Last year, you know, 577 00:32:55,800 --> 00:32:58,920 Speaker 1: my boyfriend and I we did that and that was 578 00:32:59,040 --> 00:33:01,000 Speaker 1: good for me. Mean, I think it was like our 579 00:33:01,040 --> 00:33:05,360 Speaker 1: first Christmas together and we just decided that we'll just 580 00:33:05,400 --> 00:33:07,880 Speaker 1: spend this amount of money because it just was like 581 00:33:07,920 --> 00:33:10,160 Speaker 1: it's like kind of awkward when you're like, you know, 582 00:33:10,360 --> 00:33:13,000 Speaker 1: newly doing something, and you know, I think that changes 583 00:33:13,040 --> 00:33:16,600 Speaker 1: the longer you're in a relationship. But like for me, 584 00:33:16,800 --> 00:33:18,680 Speaker 1: that was a really good way to do it because 585 00:33:18,720 --> 00:33:22,240 Speaker 1: then I felt like I had a wheelhouse of where 586 00:33:22,240 --> 00:33:24,200 Speaker 1: he was going to go. He ended up doing way 587 00:33:24,240 --> 00:33:26,640 Speaker 1: better than me because he got he nailed the thoughtful 588 00:33:26,760 --> 00:33:31,400 Speaker 1: part and did a really great gift um, but we didn't. 589 00:33:31,520 --> 00:33:34,640 Speaker 1: Neither one of us was like overly extravagant or overly 590 00:33:34,800 --> 00:33:37,000 Speaker 1: then the other one was like cheaper, you know, So 591 00:33:37,160 --> 00:33:40,560 Speaker 1: especially with the family, I would personally say, I think 592 00:33:40,560 --> 00:33:43,040 Speaker 1: that that's such an easy thing to say to your boyfriend, 593 00:33:43,040 --> 00:33:46,600 Speaker 1: like hey, like you give me a range here or 594 00:33:46,680 --> 00:33:48,680 Speaker 1: like is there a cap of like how much you 595 00:33:48,680 --> 00:33:51,280 Speaker 1: guys usually spend? And then I think with your boyfriend 596 00:33:51,280 --> 00:33:53,120 Speaker 1: you can just openly be like, okay, let's put it 597 00:33:53,160 --> 00:33:56,000 Speaker 1: like a hundred dollar cap or whatever you're you're spending 598 00:33:56,040 --> 00:33:58,960 Speaker 1: limit is, and and just say like that's where we 599 00:33:59,000 --> 00:34:01,400 Speaker 1: go this year, like you know, if we want to 600 00:34:01,400 --> 00:34:04,240 Speaker 1: do more later whatever you can. But like I think 601 00:34:04,320 --> 00:34:09,600 Speaker 1: a cap is a good gauge, especially in a new relationship. Yeah, 602 00:34:09,920 --> 00:34:11,880 Speaker 1: I don't really is that awkward because to me it 603 00:34:11,920 --> 00:34:14,279 Speaker 1: wasn't augread. It actually felt great and I got the 604 00:34:14,320 --> 00:34:16,640 Speaker 1: clarity unneeded of like where do you even look or 605 00:34:16,640 --> 00:34:19,799 Speaker 1: where to start? Like it totally felt casual to me, 606 00:34:20,040 --> 00:34:23,080 Speaker 1: and it made the whole process a way more casual 607 00:34:23,920 --> 00:34:29,640 Speaker 1: and less stressful. Yeah. Um, talking about money in general 608 00:34:29,800 --> 00:34:36,000 Speaker 1: stresses me out. So it's like I I could, I 609 00:34:36,640 --> 00:34:40,200 Speaker 1: would approach it like, um, I don't want to put 610 00:34:40,200 --> 00:34:42,560 Speaker 1: a cap on it, but I'm not gonna like I'm 611 00:34:42,560 --> 00:34:45,680 Speaker 1: gonna look for something that is thoughtful and I don't 612 00:34:45,680 --> 00:34:47,480 Speaker 1: want I would say I don't want you to spend 613 00:34:47,520 --> 00:34:49,840 Speaker 1: a ton of money on me either, you know, like totally, 614 00:34:51,080 --> 00:34:52,759 Speaker 1: and I would just kind of leave it at that. 615 00:34:53,320 --> 00:34:57,040 Speaker 1: But then you also have to like check your expectations, 616 00:34:57,080 --> 00:35:00,560 Speaker 1: Like on Christmas morning, you can't open something and be 617 00:35:00,640 --> 00:35:05,760 Speaker 1: like this motherfucker just got me through, you know, unless 618 00:35:05,800 --> 00:35:08,560 Speaker 1: it's something that feels like he grabbed you a candle 619 00:35:09,080 --> 00:35:11,480 Speaker 1: at TJ Max when he was checking out. You know 620 00:35:11,520 --> 00:35:15,920 Speaker 1: what a candle reference look and I love a good candle. 621 00:35:17,680 --> 00:35:19,680 Speaker 1: It better it better be a candle that it looks 622 00:35:19,680 --> 00:35:21,960 Speaker 1: like you put some fucking thought into and not just 623 00:35:22,040 --> 00:35:26,080 Speaker 1: like one that he got at you know. Yeah, it's 624 00:35:26,120 --> 00:35:32,160 Speaker 1: like so just to have something so um to me. 625 00:35:32,239 --> 00:35:33,960 Speaker 1: It's like the more that you can see that there 626 00:35:34,040 --> 00:35:36,799 Speaker 1: is thought in it um and too. It's like when 627 00:35:36,800 --> 00:35:38,680 Speaker 1: I've gotten gifts where I'm like, you should not have 628 00:35:38,680 --> 00:35:41,080 Speaker 1: spent this much money on me. When I can tell 629 00:35:41,200 --> 00:35:44,000 Speaker 1: like the reason why they got it for me was 630 00:35:44,080 --> 00:35:46,520 Speaker 1: because of the thought and they really did not care 631 00:35:46,560 --> 00:35:49,200 Speaker 1: about the price. Fact, it sort of takes the guilt 632 00:35:49,239 --> 00:35:54,080 Speaker 1: away to Yeah. I mean, it's a weird dynamic gifts giving. 633 00:35:54,200 --> 00:35:58,040 Speaker 1: It's like not necessarily my love language. So I don't 634 00:35:58,040 --> 00:36:02,320 Speaker 1: know that I will relate to the it to relate 635 00:36:02,360 --> 00:36:04,640 Speaker 1: to the stresses of it, because especially when you're on 636 00:36:05,719 --> 00:36:07,480 Speaker 1: like you have to do it like a Christmas or 637 00:36:07,480 --> 00:36:08,680 Speaker 1: a birthday, and you have to do it on a 638 00:36:08,680 --> 00:36:11,480 Speaker 1: certain schedule. It's it is. It's like, uh, and you know, 639 00:36:11,520 --> 00:36:13,080 Speaker 1: when you think of a good idea, it's just so 640 00:36:13,160 --> 00:36:15,960 Speaker 1: much more fun to like give it to that person 641 00:36:16,200 --> 00:36:19,960 Speaker 1: randomly or whatever. Um. But yeah, so I I think 642 00:36:20,000 --> 00:36:22,000 Speaker 1: you can court. You can back yourself into a corner 643 00:36:22,040 --> 00:36:24,879 Speaker 1: with a limit to like and you're like, okay, let's 644 00:36:24,920 --> 00:36:27,400 Speaker 1: like we're only doing fifty bucks. Like then you're like, god, 645 00:36:27,520 --> 00:36:31,359 Speaker 1: damn it, I can't find anything like like that's yeah, 646 00:36:31,400 --> 00:36:35,000 Speaker 1: you might miss something that's sixty and like you're you 647 00:36:35,040 --> 00:36:37,480 Speaker 1: know what I mean, it's just a range. I think 648 00:36:37,480 --> 00:36:40,719 Speaker 1: a range is good. Like let's say your range was 649 00:36:40,800 --> 00:36:43,319 Speaker 1: fifty two a hundred, so you're not so locked in, 650 00:36:43,480 --> 00:36:46,600 Speaker 1: but like you have like a little bit of a wheelhouse. Also, 651 00:36:46,760 --> 00:36:48,799 Speaker 1: like the good news is with the Internet these days, 652 00:36:48,920 --> 00:36:52,880 Speaker 1: you can google anything from gift guides to thoughtful gifts, 653 00:36:53,200 --> 00:36:55,320 Speaker 1: and I think those are great ways to get some ideas. 654 00:36:55,640 --> 00:36:58,000 Speaker 1: I will say, like my boyfriend's gift to me was 655 00:36:58,160 --> 00:37:01,840 Speaker 1: so good. He did, um, he got me this super 656 00:37:01,880 --> 00:37:03,560 Speaker 1: cool He's gonna be so embarrassed if you ever know, 657 00:37:03,600 --> 00:37:05,680 Speaker 1: as I told this story, but he got mean this 658 00:37:05,840 --> 00:37:08,759 Speaker 1: super cool leather journal, like but it was probably off 659 00:37:08,760 --> 00:37:10,920 Speaker 1: of like Etsy, like a twenty dollar thing, but it 660 00:37:11,000 --> 00:37:14,319 Speaker 1: was beautiful like leather anyway, so I thought that was it. 661 00:37:14,520 --> 00:37:16,000 Speaker 1: Like when I opened it, I was like, oh my gosh, 662 00:37:16,040 --> 00:37:18,000 Speaker 1: this is so nice because he knows I like to journal, 663 00:37:18,160 --> 00:37:20,040 Speaker 1: and I just thought that that was it. But he 664 00:37:20,120 --> 00:37:21,920 Speaker 1: was like, well you can open it, and he had 665 00:37:22,040 --> 00:37:25,480 Speaker 1: inside of it. He does this with his daughters, but 666 00:37:26,000 --> 00:37:30,319 Speaker 1: he um writes down like funny things they say or 667 00:37:30,840 --> 00:37:34,400 Speaker 1: funny memories or cool memories or sweet memories so that 668 00:37:34,480 --> 00:37:37,000 Speaker 1: he'll remember them, you know, because like we're all like 669 00:37:37,080 --> 00:37:39,520 Speaker 1: so overloaded all the time. It's like he forgets stuff, 670 00:37:39,560 --> 00:37:42,320 Speaker 1: and especially with kids, I think you want to remember. 671 00:37:42,360 --> 00:37:45,640 Speaker 1: And so in my journal he had written down all 672 00:37:45,800 --> 00:37:51,920 Speaker 1: these like fun um fun times, sweet times, nice things, 673 00:37:51,960 --> 00:37:55,160 Speaker 1: are like moments he realized how he felt about me, 674 00:37:55,600 --> 00:37:57,640 Speaker 1: but so he wouldn't forget, like he wrote him in 675 00:37:57,680 --> 00:37:59,239 Speaker 1: this journal, and he was like, we can keep this 676 00:37:59,360 --> 00:38:02,279 Speaker 1: going like throughout our relationship, but so we can keep 677 00:38:02,400 --> 00:38:05,040 Speaker 1: note of like all the monumental things or all the 678 00:38:05,160 --> 00:38:08,040 Speaker 1: like memories we never want to forget, all the moments, 679 00:38:08,080 --> 00:38:09,680 Speaker 1: all the things we say to each other, those kind 680 00:38:09,680 --> 00:38:11,640 Speaker 1: of things. And it was like, literally the best gift 681 00:38:11,680 --> 00:38:14,160 Speaker 1: I've ever gotten. I love that. I love What if 682 00:38:14,160 --> 00:38:16,600 Speaker 1: you had like fake dramatic and you're like, well ship, 683 00:38:16,719 --> 00:38:19,640 Speaker 1: now you've already written in it like this isn't my journal, 684 00:38:20,080 --> 00:38:24,800 Speaker 1: like would never first of all rude, but second of all, 685 00:38:24,800 --> 00:38:26,960 Speaker 1: like it was like I think I cried. He gave 686 00:38:27,040 --> 00:38:29,239 Speaker 1: me that, and then he took the angiogram test and 687 00:38:29,280 --> 00:38:31,680 Speaker 1: printed out with his stuff ment and I was like, 688 00:38:31,920 --> 00:38:36,360 Speaker 1: oh my god, he's a one I'm a four. Yeah, 689 00:38:36,560 --> 00:38:39,960 Speaker 1: but we that literally I was like, oh my god, 690 00:38:40,120 --> 00:38:42,279 Speaker 1: he like nailed it. If you know anything about me, 691 00:38:42,280 --> 00:38:44,640 Speaker 1: I'm obsessed with the angiogram, and like I had been 692 00:38:44,680 --> 00:38:47,440 Speaker 1: begging him to take it and he thought he was 693 00:38:47,480 --> 00:38:49,799 Speaker 1: just like, this is so ridiculous. He hates stuff like that, 694 00:38:50,040 --> 00:38:51,440 Speaker 1: but he did it for me. And so I of 695 00:38:51,520 --> 00:38:54,480 Speaker 1: course have read every single part of the packet of 696 00:38:54,560 --> 00:38:56,759 Speaker 1: his thing, and I think it's fascinating and he like 697 00:38:56,800 --> 00:38:59,600 Speaker 1: doesn't give two ships, but he knew I would love it. 698 00:38:59,719 --> 00:39:02,719 Speaker 1: So it was like two of the best gifts I've 699 00:39:02,719 --> 00:39:06,640 Speaker 1: ever received, but very thoughtful and didn't cost a ton. 700 00:39:06,800 --> 00:39:09,799 Speaker 1: You know. It was just like the sentiment behind it. 701 00:39:09,960 --> 00:39:13,799 Speaker 1: So there you go. I love that. That wasn't really 702 00:39:13,800 --> 00:39:16,400 Speaker 1: sweet gift. Yeah, he did well, he did well. And 703 00:39:16,640 --> 00:39:20,280 Speaker 1: then you did you you you mentioned Etsy. I think 704 00:39:20,400 --> 00:39:23,919 Speaker 1: that first of all, like all these major retailers are 705 00:39:23,960 --> 00:39:26,480 Speaker 1: like so behind on all their shipping and stuff. Now 706 00:39:26,560 --> 00:39:29,040 Speaker 1: you're going to get to it. Do not yet, Do 707 00:39:29,280 --> 00:39:34,640 Speaker 1: not forget about Etsy. These are small businesses people, um Like, 708 00:39:34,800 --> 00:39:37,440 Speaker 1: these people need your money more than Target and Walmart 709 00:39:37,480 --> 00:39:41,759 Speaker 1: and Amazon totally, and they're not as overwhelmed and the 710 00:39:41,920 --> 00:39:45,120 Speaker 1: creativity is higher you're gonna find and you can get 711 00:39:45,200 --> 00:39:48,160 Speaker 1: so specifical what you're looking for, and people do a 712 00:39:48,160 --> 00:39:51,520 Speaker 1: lot of custom stuff, so I think Etsy is like 713 00:39:51,640 --> 00:39:54,120 Speaker 1: where it's at this Christmas for people. Absolutely. I have 714 00:39:54,200 --> 00:39:56,400 Speaker 1: two gift guides up on velvet edge dot com to 715 00:39:56,520 --> 00:39:58,880 Speaker 1: if this is helpful to you guys, but I have 716 00:39:59,040 --> 00:40:01,760 Speaker 1: one for him, it one for her, And within each 717 00:40:01,760 --> 00:40:06,879 Speaker 1: of those posts we have multiple different like fashion, text, stuff, 718 00:40:06,920 --> 00:40:10,160 Speaker 1: you know, miscellaneous, all the random stuff that you wouldn't 719 00:40:10,200 --> 00:40:12,960 Speaker 1: necessarily think of if you're looking for gift ideas. Also 720 00:40:13,040 --> 00:40:15,200 Speaker 1: did under one hundred gifts because I think a lot 721 00:40:15,239 --> 00:40:17,040 Speaker 1: of people are shopping on a budget this year with 722 00:40:17,080 --> 00:40:20,560 Speaker 1: COVID and everything. Um yeah, but there's definitely some Etsy 723 00:40:20,640 --> 00:40:22,160 Speaker 1: links too, because I agree with you. I think that 724 00:40:22,239 --> 00:40:25,960 Speaker 1: is a great place to shop for thoughtful and different gifts, 725 00:40:26,000 --> 00:40:30,720 Speaker 1: which we all kind of seem to want, especially this year. Yeah, well, Chip, 726 00:40:30,800 --> 00:40:32,799 Speaker 1: this is great catching up. I hate not seeing you 727 00:40:32,840 --> 00:40:37,239 Speaker 1: in person every week. This makes me so sad, I know, 728 00:40:37,320 --> 00:40:39,359 Speaker 1: but think about how fun it will be when I'm back. 729 00:40:39,920 --> 00:40:42,960 Speaker 1: That's true. I'll really really appreciate seeing you every week. 730 00:40:43,040 --> 00:40:44,680 Speaker 1: And I have to you know, we're gonna have to 731 00:40:44,760 --> 00:40:47,080 Speaker 1: really tie one on next time when we're face to 732 00:40:47,160 --> 00:40:53,560 Speaker 1: face for our next date as boyfriend or girlfriend, our 733 00:40:53,719 --> 00:40:57,759 Speaker 1: next drink date. Um, you guys, don't forget. We are 734 00:40:57,800 --> 00:41:03,080 Speaker 1: now officially on camera under Act Casual. We will pretty 735 00:41:03,160 --> 00:41:05,759 Speaker 1: much do anything we've got to record. We have. We 736 00:41:05,840 --> 00:41:10,719 Speaker 1: have a video request for seeing sorry, a dramatic reading 737 00:41:10,840 --> 00:41:13,200 Speaker 1: this is the latest one. A dramatic reading of the 738 00:41:13,239 --> 00:41:16,040 Speaker 1: whop lyrics. Did you see that one? Come in, Chip, 739 00:41:17,200 --> 00:41:19,560 Speaker 1: it's so funny, so that'll be entertaining. I might actually 740 00:41:19,600 --> 00:41:22,319 Speaker 1: have to post that if it turns out okay, But um, 741 00:41:22,360 --> 00:41:26,680 Speaker 1: you guys submit your Act Casual cameo request. Hey, if 742 00:41:26,680 --> 00:41:29,680 Speaker 1: you're looking for a gift idea. Speaking of gift ideas, 743 00:41:30,000 --> 00:41:32,120 Speaker 1: we'll do Christmas stuff. I think that could be actually 744 00:41:32,120 --> 00:41:39,279 Speaker 1: really funny. We can sing um some carols maybe or anything. Chip, 745 00:41:41,719 --> 00:41:46,879 Speaker 1: we'll record your neighbors having sex really loud. I will. 746 00:41:46,880 --> 00:41:49,399 Speaker 1: I threw the idea out, like if if anybody has 747 00:41:49,400 --> 00:41:52,239 Speaker 1: a song they want us to review, I'll review it. 748 00:41:52,600 --> 00:41:56,840 Speaker 1: Oh yeah, like you were saying, Chip works in music management, 749 00:41:56,880 --> 00:41:58,560 Speaker 1: so he was like, yeah, if I mean, any new 750 00:41:58,680 --> 00:42:01,400 Speaker 1: artists want to send in their things things Act Casual, 751 00:42:02,400 --> 00:42:05,560 Speaker 1: I'll be I'll be honest, but ship what if you 752 00:42:05,719 --> 00:42:09,160 Speaker 1: hate it? Well, I don't think I would say like 753 00:42:09,280 --> 00:42:12,759 Speaker 1: I hate this. I would say this isn't my thing, 754 00:42:13,840 --> 00:42:16,480 Speaker 1: um and this is These are the areas that I 755 00:42:16,520 --> 00:42:20,680 Speaker 1: think that some improvement could, you know, or I maybe 756 00:42:20,719 --> 00:42:23,680 Speaker 1: maybe I'll be a little meaner. But the point is 757 00:42:23,680 --> 00:42:25,200 Speaker 1: is I don't want to be mean. I want to 758 00:42:25,200 --> 00:42:27,480 Speaker 1: help people. So do you feel you're definitely not the 759 00:42:27,560 --> 00:42:31,160 Speaker 1: Simon Cowl? Do you feel like you're maybe the Randy? 760 00:42:31,320 --> 00:42:34,239 Speaker 1: I think you're the Randy. I'm the Randy. I'm like, 761 00:42:34,560 --> 00:42:39,640 Speaker 1: I'm now I'm kind of Simon Cowell without being like 762 00:42:40,719 --> 00:42:45,319 Speaker 1: you know, means snarky but not malicious. I think that 763 00:42:45,560 --> 00:42:49,480 Speaker 1: Simon often like said what everyone was thinking, but oh 764 00:42:49,560 --> 00:42:51,160 Speaker 1: he was the one that had the balls to say it. 765 00:42:51,680 --> 00:42:55,520 Speaker 1: His delivery was just like brutal. Right. Yeah, I love 766 00:42:55,560 --> 00:42:58,600 Speaker 1: that we're referencing the old judges, like the American idolism 767 00:42:58,640 --> 00:43:02,000 Speaker 1: one now and I have complete different judges, like for 768 00:43:02,000 --> 00:43:04,560 Speaker 1: for some reason we're going to Simon cal Well. You know, 769 00:43:04,680 --> 00:43:06,319 Speaker 1: you know the reason why I think we do that 770 00:43:06,480 --> 00:43:09,120 Speaker 1: is because there what I mean, granted, there had been 771 00:43:09,120 --> 00:43:11,960 Speaker 1: talent shows, you know, as long as there's been talent, 772 00:43:12,080 --> 00:43:16,239 Speaker 1: but he it was like a brand new paradigm, Like 773 00:43:16,320 --> 00:43:20,120 Speaker 1: it was so different. And now anything that follows, like 774 00:43:20,400 --> 00:43:23,319 Speaker 1: people are play they play roles because the paradigm has 775 00:43:23,360 --> 00:43:25,200 Speaker 1: been broken. Oh I see what you're saying, like the 776 00:43:25,880 --> 00:43:34,360 Speaker 1: mold Yeah yeah, yeah, so Simon did for sure. Oh man, Well, 777 00:43:34,440 --> 00:43:36,160 Speaker 1: whatever it is that you guys want us to do, 778 00:43:36,280 --> 00:43:39,080 Speaker 1: just send in the request. I mean, if it's too racy, 779 00:43:39,239 --> 00:43:41,600 Speaker 1: we might not do it. But I actually can't think 780 00:43:41,640 --> 00:43:45,719 Speaker 1: of that many things that we do. I mean we're 781 00:43:45,760 --> 00:43:49,040 Speaker 1: acting casuals, so you know, like I don't think we 782 00:43:49,080 --> 00:43:56,520 Speaker 1: have any facts left to give in anyway. You never know, 783 00:43:56,680 --> 00:44:01,200 Speaker 1: we might totally change. We're gonna be like prude, totally 784 00:44:01,239 --> 00:44:04,160 Speaker 1: shift gears here. All right, you guys keep the emails coming. 785 00:44:04,239 --> 00:44:06,440 Speaker 1: We'll be back next week with more at casual. It's 786 00:44:06,480 --> 00:44:08,840 Speaker 1: at Casual at velvet edge dot com and you can 787 00:44:08,880 --> 00:44:12,600 Speaker 1: find us on cameo at act Casual. I am on 788 00:44:12,680 --> 00:44:15,440 Speaker 1: Instagram at velvet Edge and Chip is at Chip dorsh. 789 00:44:16,000 --> 00:44:23,160 Speaker 1: Do you have any sounding offer marks, Chip m Do 790 00:44:23,160 --> 00:44:26,080 Speaker 1: you have big plans this weekend? The Are you gonna 791 00:44:26,120 --> 00:44:30,160 Speaker 1: get out of the sweatpants? That is what I'm gonna 792 00:44:30,160 --> 00:44:32,440 Speaker 1: help my dad around the yard. So you might actually 793 00:44:32,440 --> 00:44:36,080 Speaker 1: put on some real pants or I'll wear that. I'm 794 00:44:36,120 --> 00:44:37,879 Speaker 1: just saying, good for you. I'm glad your mom's gonna 795 00:44:37,920 --> 00:44:42,560 Speaker 1: wash them all right. You guys, have a great rest 796 00:44:42,640 --> 00:44:48,839 Speaker 1: of your week, great weekend, and always remember a casual 797 00:44:49,719 --> 00:44:50,800 Speaker 1: bye bye