WEBVTT - Bonus: Listener Stories, Episode 3

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<v Speaker 1>Family Secrets is a production of I Heart Radio. I'm

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<v Speaker 1>Danny Shapiro, and this is family Secrets, the secrets that

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<v Speaker 1>are kept from us, the secrets we keep from others,

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<v Speaker 1>and the secrets we keep from ourselves. As I tore

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<v Speaker 1>the nation from my book Inheritance, I've heard from so

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<v Speaker 1>many about your own family secrets and realize that what

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<v Speaker 1>we are creating for each other on this podcast is

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<v Speaker 1>a community, a community for those who are looking for

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<v Speaker 1>a safe and supportive space to unburden themselves. To that end,

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<v Speaker 1>we've created a number for listeners to call in to

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<v Speaker 1>record stories to share here in this space. This week,

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<v Speaker 1>I'd like to share a few of those stories from

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<v Speaker 1>our community. Thanks for listening, Hi, I wanted to share

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<v Speaker 1>my story worry about being protected from a secret and

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<v Speaker 1>share a first cousin story who's still in the throws

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<v Speaker 1>of the family secret. So, growing up, my mother was

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<v Speaker 1>a single mom for a little while to three children,

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<v Speaker 1>and she met my dad or my stepdad, UM when

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<v Speaker 1>I was years old, and I, of course, just as

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<v Speaker 1>a little girl, film up with him. He was so

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<v Speaker 1>much fun and um. Over the course of quite a

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<v Speaker 1>few years, I remember my mom pulling me aside and

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<v Speaker 1>telling me, Um, you know you can call him dad.

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<v Speaker 1>He loved you, but he's not your father. There's another

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<v Speaker 1>man out there and one day you will get to

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<v Speaker 1>meet him, hopefully. And I did when I was twenty

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<v Speaker 1>years old, which is another long story. UM, I did

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<v Speaker 1>meet my biological father and UM last year I was

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<v Speaker 1>I'm in my thirties now, I took my whole family out.

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<v Speaker 1>We actually went to his house for the first time

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<v Speaker 1>ever and met some of my half siblings for the

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<v Speaker 1>first time ever, and it was amazing and I felt complete.

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<v Speaker 1>I know that sounds cheesy, but I felt very complete

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<v Speaker 1>and loved and it just explained these unexplainable, invisible things.

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<v Speaker 1>So the other side of the story is my first cousin.

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<v Speaker 1>It would be my mother's sister's son who UM grew

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<v Speaker 1>up calling my uncle dad, and it's not Actually he's

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<v Speaker 1>not his biological father. And unfortunately I'm privy to this

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<v Speaker 1>um unfortunate information through family drama and gossip. And my

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<v Speaker 1>aunt doesn't know that I know my cousin. He doesn't

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<v Speaker 1>even know anything about it. And I just really feel

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<v Speaker 1>for him because I've seen him over the years. We've

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<v Speaker 1>been very close for seven months apart. Um, there's something

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<v Speaker 1>missing in his life. I believe this is what it is,

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<v Speaker 1>not knowing that side of his family, and I could

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<v Speaker 1>be completely wrong, but my heart does ache for him.

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<v Speaker 1>He has a younger brother, and there's some very very

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<v Speaker 1>big differences, and you know, it just makes you wonder

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<v Speaker 1>why one sister would tell the truth and the other

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<v Speaker 1>one wouldn't. Um, maybe just hide it and be more private. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>so I wanted to share my story. And also I

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<v Speaker 1>have three small children, and I always tell them there

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<v Speaker 1>are no secrets in this house. There are no good secrets.

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<v Speaker 1>So I don't know if that's a good thing, but

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<v Speaker 1>I do tell them that. So I'm all about the truth,

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<v Speaker 1>even when it's hard. Thank you so much for your podcast.

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<v Speaker 1>That's really like hidden out with me in my heart,

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<v Speaker 1>and I just really am enjoying it. Hi. UM. My

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<v Speaker 1>family secret is that when I was about ten years old,

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<v Speaker 1>I found some family documents showing that um, the man

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<v Speaker 1>I believed to be my father had legally adopted me

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<v Speaker 1>when I was a child, and that I had a

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<v Speaker 1>man that did not want to be involved in my life. Um.

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<v Speaker 1>I did meet him later on, and he still adamantly

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<v Speaker 1>just did not want to be in vault. Um growing up.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm now in my thirties and at the ancestry DNA

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<v Speaker 1>just too. I think that I was proving that he

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<v Speaker 1>was my biological father, and come to find out he

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<v Speaker 1>is not. Um, I've now found this whole other family

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<v Speaker 1>that I did not know that I had, and this

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<v Speaker 1>man that is my biological father had wanted to be

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<v Speaker 1>involved in my life. So now we are in the

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<v Speaker 1>process of tracking him down and getting to know this

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<v Speaker 1>whole o their family. UM. So that is my family secret.

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<v Speaker 1>Thank you. Hi. I thought i'd call in and share

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<v Speaker 1>some of my story. So very long and convoluted story

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<v Speaker 1>with lots of twists and turns, So I'll try and

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<v Speaker 1>be brief and just pick the one that kind of

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<v Speaker 1>is the most present and prevalent in my current situation. UM.

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<v Speaker 1>My mother family had always told me that a certain

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<v Speaker 1>man was my father. UM. He was never involved in

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<v Speaker 1>my brother in my life. My brother and I are

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<v Speaker 1>two years apart. UM. He appeared all of a sudden

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<v Speaker 1>when my brother and I were thirteen and fifteen, respectively. Well,

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<v Speaker 1>I was thirteen and he was fifteen. He was in

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<v Speaker 1>town for a wedding and we and we met him,

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<v Speaker 1>and I remember when we met him, um for the

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<v Speaker 1>first time, looking at him and then looking at my

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<v Speaker 1>brother and thinking, wow, what a resemblance, but then feeling

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<v Speaker 1>really lost because I looked nothing like him. I should

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<v Speaker 1>mention that my family is is Italian and um, this

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<v Speaker 1>man was black. Um, and my brother was visibly mixed.

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<v Speaker 1>Um I was not. I never was. Fast forward into

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<v Speaker 1>my early twenties, I married, I have my first child,

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<v Speaker 1>and my husband is kind of poking fun at me

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<v Speaker 1>that you know, you can't possibly think that's your father.

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<v Speaker 1>And keeping in mind again, I had no relationship with

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<v Speaker 1>this man. He just you know, I know of him.

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<v Speaker 1>There's no name on my birth certificate. My mother gave

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<v Speaker 1>me her last name, but she gave my brother our

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<v Speaker 1>father's last name. Um, it's the last words. And I said,

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<v Speaker 1>you know, you might have a point. So I slide

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<v Speaker 1>to the province that he's in and we do a

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<v Speaker 1>DNA test, and of course she's not my father. I

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<v Speaker 1>confront my mother and UM, she denies, and she's she

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<v Speaker 1>shounds so convincing in her life that you know, I

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<v Speaker 1>don't know what you're talking about. This is he's the

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<v Speaker 1>only person that it could be so I kind of

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<v Speaker 1>leave it at that, and I asked the family and

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<v Speaker 1>they say, no, well, I mean this is that's to

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<v Speaker 1>your father's And he said, well, you know, I'm white

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<v Speaker 1>like she was black. Hello, um, I felt like it

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<v Speaker 1>was in the toilet, don't really. Just then fast forward

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<v Speaker 1>another ten years and my mother dies out there's various

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<v Speaker 1>things that she had along with her, and I do

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<v Speaker 1>the end sister Dnah test and it comes back that

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<v Speaker 1>UM with some second cousin matches UM from Portugal. So

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<v Speaker 1>I find out that my my father's family is from

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<v Speaker 1>the a source UM in Portugal. And so I'm on

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<v Speaker 1>a mission to try and locate my father and it's

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<v Speaker 1>very difficult because the families are you know, ten and

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<v Speaker 1>twenty siblings large. But I'm on my way, and at

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<v Speaker 1>least now I know what the other side of me is.

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<v Speaker 1>Thanks for letting me share my story. Take care. If

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<v Speaker 1>you'd like to share your story, call one eight eight

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<v Speaker 1>eight Secret zero and record your story. We won't be

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<v Speaker 1>able to run all the stories, but we do want

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<v Speaker 1>to shine a light on as many as we can.

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<v Speaker 1>The number again is one eight eight secret and in

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<v Speaker 1>the numeral zero for more podcasts for My Heart radio,

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<v Speaker 1>visit the I heart Radio app, Apple podcast, or wherever

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<v Speaker 1>you listen to your favorite shows.