1 00:00:01,639 --> 00:00:09,040 Speaker 1: You're listening to I Choose Me with Jenny Girl. Welcome 2 00:00:09,080 --> 00:00:12,399 Speaker 1: to I Choose Me, the podcast about the choices we 3 00:00:12,440 --> 00:00:17,000 Speaker 1: make to redefine what it means to evolve and thrive 4 00:00:17,560 --> 00:00:21,440 Speaker 1: on our own terms. From reluctantly agreeing to an on 5 00:00:21,640 --> 00:00:26,200 Speaker 1: air mammogram that ultimately saved her life, to weathering a 6 00:00:26,480 --> 00:00:31,560 Speaker 1: very public departure from network television to finding love and partnership. 7 00:00:31,680 --> 00:00:35,080 Speaker 1: Amy Robach exemplifies what it means to be a role 8 00:00:35,120 --> 00:00:39,080 Speaker 1: model for choosing Me, I'm so thrilled to have her 9 00:00:39,120 --> 00:00:43,400 Speaker 1: with me today. Hi, hello, beautiful. When's the last time 10 00:00:43,440 --> 00:00:46,000 Speaker 1: I saw you? Was it jingle Balls? 11 00:00:46,200 --> 00:00:49,960 Speaker 2: Was it? I feel like we saw you for a 12 00:00:50,080 --> 00:00:53,600 Speaker 2: fleeting boat. Yes, but it was like and I thought 13 00:00:53,600 --> 00:00:55,279 Speaker 2: we would see you again and then we never did. 14 00:00:55,440 --> 00:00:56,960 Speaker 1: No, it was literally a drive by. 15 00:00:57,480 --> 00:00:59,080 Speaker 2: Yeah, that's exactly. 16 00:01:00,320 --> 00:01:04,160 Speaker 1: It is so funny. You are beautiful, you are glowing. 17 00:01:04,440 --> 00:01:06,840 Speaker 1: I think, oh, love looks great on you. 18 00:01:07,200 --> 00:01:09,160 Speaker 2: Thank you. 19 00:01:09,160 --> 00:01:12,440 Speaker 1: You know. I was thinking life changes so much and 20 00:01:12,480 --> 00:01:16,280 Speaker 1: love looks so different at our age, and it will 21 00:01:16,360 --> 00:01:19,280 Speaker 1: when we're eighty two. What does love and connection look 22 00:01:19,440 --> 00:01:22,399 Speaker 1: like at this stage for you compared to when you 23 00:01:22,400 --> 00:01:22,959 Speaker 1: were younger? 24 00:01:23,319 --> 00:01:27,520 Speaker 2: Yeah, well I understand it now. I think I did 25 00:01:27,560 --> 00:01:30,480 Speaker 2: not know what love was. I was in love with 26 00:01:30,520 --> 00:01:36,400 Speaker 2: my career, I was in love with ambition. I really 27 00:01:36,520 --> 00:01:42,520 Speaker 2: didn't focus on giving and actually loving someone until I 28 00:01:42,560 --> 00:01:47,000 Speaker 2: found the right person. And it's amazing when you realize 29 00:01:47,240 --> 00:01:50,600 Speaker 2: you didn't know what you didn't know until you actually 30 00:01:50,640 --> 00:01:55,320 Speaker 2: find it. And for me, love is about respect, It 31 00:01:55,360 --> 00:02:00,400 Speaker 2: is about trust, and it is about friendship and compatibility, 32 00:02:00,560 --> 00:02:07,160 Speaker 2: and just for me, it's just so beautiful to want 33 00:02:07,320 --> 00:02:12,760 Speaker 2: to be with someone and never wanting to leave their side. 34 00:02:12,840 --> 00:02:15,960 Speaker 2: It's just it's I've never had this experience before, so 35 00:02:16,080 --> 00:02:20,920 Speaker 2: this has been it's I saved the best for last. 36 00:02:22,000 --> 00:02:24,960 Speaker 1: Well speaking and not leaving each other's side. You guys 37 00:02:24,960 --> 00:02:28,600 Speaker 1: are always together, your life partners, your business partners, you 38 00:02:28,760 --> 00:02:29,919 Speaker 1: do the podcast together. 39 00:02:31,040 --> 00:02:35,600 Speaker 2: Some people pull it unhealthy. Yeah, you know, it's funny. 40 00:02:35,639 --> 00:02:40,639 Speaker 2: We spent eight years being each other's really really good friends, 41 00:02:40,880 --> 00:02:42,799 Speaker 2: and I'd say the last two years of that were 42 00:02:42,800 --> 00:02:46,080 Speaker 2: being each other's best friend and missing each other and 43 00:02:46,160 --> 00:02:49,919 Speaker 2: always wanting to try to hang out and just chill 44 00:02:49,960 --> 00:02:53,160 Speaker 2: and go do our thing, and never being able to 45 00:02:53,400 --> 00:02:57,239 Speaker 2: actually figure it out until we ended up in our 46 00:02:57,440 --> 00:03:00,440 Speaker 2: romantic relationship. And now it's kind of like almost if 47 00:03:00,440 --> 00:03:01,720 Speaker 2: we're making up for lost time. 48 00:03:02,919 --> 00:03:04,720 Speaker 1: That sounds so fun. 49 00:03:06,680 --> 00:03:10,799 Speaker 2: We have fun almost every day. We try to make 50 00:03:10,800 --> 00:03:11,520 Speaker 2: it a priority. 51 00:03:11,800 --> 00:03:15,560 Speaker 1: Okay, so aside from work, how do you guys find 52 00:03:15,680 --> 00:03:16,399 Speaker 1: a couple time? 53 00:03:17,960 --> 00:03:20,240 Speaker 2: You know what? It sounds funny because we already gethered 54 00:03:20,280 --> 00:03:22,240 Speaker 2: twenty four to seven, and yet we will look at 55 00:03:22,240 --> 00:03:26,040 Speaker 2: each other and say I miss you, and we have 56 00:03:26,160 --> 00:03:29,960 Speaker 2: tried to. We have our spots. On the weekends, we 57 00:03:30,040 --> 00:03:31,919 Speaker 2: always try to go to a brunch just the two 58 00:03:31,960 --> 00:03:33,320 Speaker 2: of us, and we try to make a rule no 59 00:03:33,600 --> 00:03:38,520 Speaker 2: talk about work, and I'm usually guilty. I'll start saying 60 00:03:38,560 --> 00:03:43,480 Speaker 2: something like it is hard and we have to make 61 00:03:43,520 --> 00:03:46,000 Speaker 2: an effort. So we usually go to any big horror 62 00:03:46,000 --> 00:03:48,960 Speaker 2: movie that's coming out. That's like a date afternoon for 63 00:03:49,040 --> 00:03:51,040 Speaker 2: us because we get up really early, so date nights 64 00:03:51,040 --> 00:03:53,160 Speaker 2: are like date late afternoons for us. 65 00:03:53,920 --> 00:03:56,240 Speaker 1: And wait, did you say horror movie? 66 00:03:56,440 --> 00:04:00,000 Speaker 2: Oh yeah, we're obsessed with horror movies. Okay, any horror movie. 67 00:04:00,040 --> 00:04:02,360 Speaker 2: In fact, that was initially in terms of our friendship, 68 00:04:02,960 --> 00:04:07,080 Speaker 2: something that connected us immediately because we didn't know a 69 00:04:07,120 --> 00:04:08,800 Speaker 2: lot of other people who liked them, and when we 70 00:04:08,880 --> 00:04:12,480 Speaker 2: found that we both loved I mean upset why why? 71 00:04:12,520 --> 00:04:14,760 Speaker 2: Why are you obsessed with them? Since I was in 72 00:04:14,880 --> 00:04:19,400 Speaker 2: second grade and sneaked to my neighbor's house and saw Poltergeist, 73 00:04:19,720 --> 00:04:22,559 Speaker 2: I have been hooked thrill. I think what it is 74 00:04:22,560 --> 00:04:27,640 Speaker 2: is you get to experience heart pounding fear and like 75 00:04:27,680 --> 00:04:31,760 Speaker 2: a thrill, a high and adrenaline rush without actually being 76 00:04:31,800 --> 00:04:34,440 Speaker 2: in danger. And I don't think I knew that initially 77 00:04:34,480 --> 00:04:37,440 Speaker 2: what attracted me to horror movies, but I do think 78 00:04:37,440 --> 00:04:41,359 Speaker 2: it's this excitement and this you get to experience fear 79 00:04:41,440 --> 00:04:46,480 Speaker 2: without being threatened. Actually, and there's this, I see it. 80 00:04:46,600 --> 00:04:48,200 Speaker 2: I get excitement about that. 81 00:04:48,360 --> 00:04:53,080 Speaker 1: Yeah, so you guys connected over your love of horror. 82 00:04:52,720 --> 00:04:55,479 Speaker 2: Movies one hundred percent. That was one of our I 83 00:04:55,520 --> 00:04:58,600 Speaker 2: think the first thing were like you two, and then 84 00:04:58,640 --> 00:05:01,400 Speaker 2: we just started listing like like deep cuts and then 85 00:05:01,440 --> 00:05:04,680 Speaker 2: you know, if someone is a true horror fan, like, okay, 86 00:05:04,960 --> 00:05:06,160 Speaker 2: you're legit. Yeah. 87 00:05:06,640 --> 00:05:10,000 Speaker 1: I definitely wouldn't connect with somebody based on my horror 88 00:05:10,000 --> 00:05:10,680 Speaker 1: film knowledge. 89 00:05:11,120 --> 00:05:15,200 Speaker 2: I get scared. So yes we are. We're slightly strange, 90 00:05:15,240 --> 00:05:17,919 Speaker 2: and we've been judged for our love of horror movies. 91 00:05:17,960 --> 00:05:19,200 Speaker 2: So yes, we had that in common. 92 00:05:19,640 --> 00:05:22,560 Speaker 1: Oh I don't want to who's going to judge you 93 00:05:22,640 --> 00:05:24,520 Speaker 1: for what kind of movie you like my mom? 94 00:05:24,880 --> 00:05:28,960 Speaker 2: Oh why in the mom? Well would you get like 95 00:05:29,200 --> 00:05:32,800 Speaker 2: any sort of pleasure out of that? I don't understand. 96 00:05:33,000 --> 00:05:39,040 Speaker 1: Yes, you said before you were driven by work and 97 00:05:39,240 --> 00:05:43,520 Speaker 1: by achieving. Where did that come from? Did that come 98 00:05:43,520 --> 00:05:44,440 Speaker 1: from your upbringing? 99 00:05:45,680 --> 00:05:52,640 Speaker 2: Yes, my parents were. My dad was cut off from 100 00:05:52,680 --> 00:05:54,880 Speaker 2: his family financially, and not that they had a ton 101 00:05:54,880 --> 00:05:58,400 Speaker 2: of money. And my mom came from nothing that in Harbor, Michigan, 102 00:05:58,480 --> 00:06:01,760 Speaker 2: one of nine children, and my grandfather I think made 103 00:06:01,800 --> 00:06:03,919 Speaker 2: fifteen thousand dollars a year as a home builder, not 104 00:06:04,000 --> 00:06:07,960 Speaker 2: college educated, and the children of immigrants. So yes, they 105 00:06:08,000 --> 00:06:09,920 Speaker 2: came from nothing. And then my mom got pregnant with 106 00:06:09,960 --> 00:06:12,800 Speaker 2: me at eighteen and had two kids by twenty one. 107 00:06:12,839 --> 00:06:17,320 Speaker 2: They were on food stamps and built themselves up slowly 108 00:06:17,360 --> 00:06:20,080 Speaker 2: but surely. But I saw the struggle. I was in 109 00:06:20,120 --> 00:06:23,040 Speaker 2: a household where we were always worried about money, and 110 00:06:23,880 --> 00:06:27,359 Speaker 2: my mom and dad really invested in my brother and 111 00:06:27,400 --> 00:06:31,480 Speaker 2: I in our education and not they actually couldn't afford college, 112 00:06:31,520 --> 00:06:34,840 Speaker 2: but invested in the support of getting good grades and 113 00:06:34,880 --> 00:06:38,120 Speaker 2: accomplishing and pulling yourself up by your bootstraps. And so 114 00:06:38,680 --> 00:06:40,160 Speaker 2: they sat as sound and said, we have no money 115 00:06:40,160 --> 00:06:42,159 Speaker 2: for college, so you got to get all you got. 116 00:06:42,240 --> 00:06:46,080 Speaker 2: You have to get an academic scholarship or you'll, you know, 117 00:06:46,120 --> 00:06:48,120 Speaker 2: you'll have to take out loans. And so it was motivating. 118 00:06:48,160 --> 00:06:51,120 Speaker 2: And so I just think that mindset of I got 119 00:06:51,160 --> 00:06:53,560 Speaker 2: a hustle, I got to make this happen, and it 120 00:06:53,760 --> 00:06:56,839 Speaker 2: just it moved me. It stayed with me, it's never 121 00:06:56,920 --> 00:07:00,719 Speaker 2: left me. And that my dad. I watch my dad 122 00:07:01,080 --> 00:07:04,560 Speaker 2: get his master's degree, become an amazing microbiologist. So you know, 123 00:07:05,040 --> 00:07:07,800 Speaker 2: I saw people because they were so young when they 124 00:07:07,920 --> 00:07:11,840 Speaker 2: had me. We grew up together, all right. I mean 125 00:07:11,920 --> 00:07:13,840 Speaker 2: my parents were empty nesters at thirty seven. 126 00:07:14,400 --> 00:07:16,200 Speaker 1: Oh my god, that sounds amazing. 127 00:07:17,960 --> 00:07:20,600 Speaker 2: My friends were having children at forty two, forty three, 128 00:07:20,920 --> 00:07:22,400 Speaker 2: and there's nothing wrong with that, but it's just so 129 00:07:22,480 --> 00:07:26,720 Speaker 2: funny because my grandmother was a grandma at forty. 130 00:07:27,320 --> 00:07:30,120 Speaker 1: It sounds amazing because I mean I had kids young too. 131 00:07:30,720 --> 00:07:32,440 Speaker 1: Now I was twenty three, I had my first daughter, 132 00:07:32,760 --> 00:07:36,080 Speaker 1: so and I love loved every second of being a 133 00:07:36,120 --> 00:07:39,600 Speaker 1: young mom. And like you said, I fully just grew 134 00:07:39,680 --> 00:07:40,880 Speaker 1: up with my kids along the way. 135 00:07:42,000 --> 00:07:45,480 Speaker 2: So that you know, I think seeing them struggle and 136 00:07:45,520 --> 00:07:49,480 Speaker 2: seeing them work their way out of struggle was a 137 00:07:49,560 --> 00:07:51,560 Speaker 2: lesson that didn't have to be talked to me because 138 00:07:51,560 --> 00:07:52,440 Speaker 2: I witnessed it. 139 00:07:52,640 --> 00:07:55,440 Speaker 1: Right at fifty I know you're at the same age 140 00:07:55,440 --> 00:07:58,960 Speaker 1: as me. At fifty three, I'll say my age, but 141 00:07:59,000 --> 00:07:59,760 Speaker 1: I won't say your age. 142 00:07:59,800 --> 00:08:02,560 Speaker 2: I'm oh, I just turned fifty three. I forget it. 143 00:08:02,840 --> 00:08:04,640 Speaker 1: I didn't want to like say it if you don't 144 00:08:04,680 --> 00:08:08,640 Speaker 1: say it. Yeah, So at fifty three, do you ever 145 00:08:08,800 --> 00:08:12,320 Speaker 1: step back and be like I just I'm tired of 146 00:08:12,360 --> 00:08:12,840 Speaker 1: the hustle. 147 00:08:14,080 --> 00:08:19,360 Speaker 2: Oh yes, but the cool thing is right now, I 148 00:08:19,440 --> 00:08:23,560 Speaker 2: teach and I are, we're our own bosses, and so 149 00:08:23,640 --> 00:08:27,800 Speaker 2: we're hustling for us, and we're hustling in a different way. 150 00:08:28,560 --> 00:08:33,160 Speaker 2: Initially it was rebuilding what we had lost, not just 151 00:08:33,200 --> 00:08:41,120 Speaker 2: financially or but like credibility wise, like rebuilding our our 152 00:08:41,120 --> 00:08:45,840 Speaker 2: trust and ourselves are our audience that we had built 153 00:08:45,840 --> 00:08:49,520 Speaker 2: and spent three decades building almost. I mean, my goodness, 154 00:08:49,640 --> 00:08:53,400 Speaker 2: I had been in the business for twenty seven years, hustling, hustling, hustling, 155 00:08:53,440 --> 00:08:59,119 Speaker 2: and you feel like in one one fell swoop unfairly 156 00:08:59,400 --> 00:09:02,040 Speaker 2: all of a sudden, and everything you work for just crumbled. 157 00:09:02,080 --> 00:09:05,160 Speaker 2: So you're fighting for your reputation, your credibility, and now 158 00:09:05,280 --> 00:09:10,400 Speaker 2: we feel like we've built up a really cool audience 159 00:09:10,440 --> 00:09:13,760 Speaker 2: where we get to tell the news with our perspective 160 00:09:14,400 --> 00:09:17,240 Speaker 2: and give folks updates. We've kind of created this little 161 00:09:17,280 --> 00:09:20,640 Speaker 2: mini news network here out of our apartment, in our 162 00:09:20,679 --> 00:09:23,640 Speaker 2: podcast room, and it's fun because the hustle now is 163 00:09:23,720 --> 00:09:25,760 Speaker 2: for us. It's not for someone else, and I'm not 164 00:09:25,800 --> 00:09:28,520 Speaker 2: proving anything to anyone else. Now, we're actually just doing 165 00:09:28,520 --> 00:09:30,839 Speaker 2: what we love. When we get to do it together, that. 166 00:09:30,880 --> 00:09:31,880 Speaker 1: Makes a big difference. 167 00:09:32,240 --> 00:09:32,679 Speaker 2: It does. 168 00:09:34,160 --> 00:09:38,280 Speaker 1: Yeah, I can't imagine what that must have been like when. 169 00:09:38,520 --> 00:09:41,000 Speaker 2: It was hell. It was worse than it was, worse 170 00:09:41,080 --> 00:09:43,920 Speaker 2: than cancer. It was the hardest, hardest year of my life. 171 00:09:43,960 --> 00:09:47,960 Speaker 2: And I think anyone who has had who's been misunderstood, 172 00:09:48,559 --> 00:09:53,200 Speaker 2: who's had a who's been judged off a false narrative 173 00:09:53,200 --> 00:09:55,360 Speaker 2: that you can never reclaim, I've learned even though I 174 00:09:55,400 --> 00:09:57,280 Speaker 2: was in the business of communication and certainly in the 175 00:09:57,280 --> 00:09:59,880 Speaker 2: business of media, I did not realize what it was 176 00:10:00,280 --> 00:10:03,920 Speaker 2: like once someone else tells your story, once it's already 177 00:10:03,920 --> 00:10:07,120 Speaker 2: out there, you can never you lose control, you lose 178 00:10:07,200 --> 00:10:10,640 Speaker 2: your narrative, and you'll never get it back. So there's 179 00:10:10,720 --> 00:10:14,440 Speaker 2: this acceptance that has to follow. That is really hard, 180 00:10:14,720 --> 00:10:16,720 Speaker 2: and it's a part of what we all have to 181 00:10:16,760 --> 00:10:19,800 Speaker 2: learn in life that we actually don't have control. And 182 00:10:19,880 --> 00:10:22,840 Speaker 2: as long as we're so obsessed with making sure other 183 00:10:22,880 --> 00:10:24,720 Speaker 2: people look at us the way we want them to 184 00:10:25,120 --> 00:10:27,040 Speaker 2: or see us the way we think we should be seen, 185 00:10:27,120 --> 00:10:29,240 Speaker 2: we're always going to be frustrated and angry because it's 186 00:10:29,280 --> 00:10:31,160 Speaker 2: never gonna happen. You have to let it go. You 187 00:10:31,880 --> 00:10:34,600 Speaker 2: have to know who you are, respect you are, love 188 00:10:34,600 --> 00:10:36,800 Speaker 2: who you are, and just be okay with that and 189 00:10:36,840 --> 00:10:39,280 Speaker 2: have that be enough. Because if you're constantly seeking approval, 190 00:10:39,320 --> 00:10:42,960 Speaker 2: which I have done for my entire life, I'm working 191 00:10:43,000 --> 00:10:47,320 Speaker 2: on it, but I'm all of this pain that I 192 00:10:47,400 --> 00:10:50,800 Speaker 2: have been through over the last several years has just 193 00:10:50,920 --> 00:10:53,680 Speaker 2: broken me open in the most incredible way. But it's 194 00:10:53,679 --> 00:10:54,240 Speaker 2: been painful. 195 00:10:55,600 --> 00:11:05,280 Speaker 1: Well, growth is painful, that's for sure. When you when 196 00:11:05,320 --> 00:11:07,960 Speaker 1: that all happened, did you kind of like lose a 197 00:11:08,000 --> 00:11:13,280 Speaker 1: sense inside yourself of who amy was like or what 198 00:11:13,280 --> 00:11:17,120 Speaker 1: what like? Did you did the negative voices that you 199 00:11:17,160 --> 00:11:19,160 Speaker 1: heard outside or even in your own head? Did they 200 00:11:19,200 --> 00:11:19,800 Speaker 1: convince you? 201 00:11:21,559 --> 00:11:21,679 Speaker 2: Oh? 202 00:11:21,760 --> 00:11:23,319 Speaker 1: Yes, of like bad messages? 203 00:11:23,679 --> 00:11:26,480 Speaker 2: One hundred percent? Yes. Oh, I'm telling you I had 204 00:11:26,480 --> 00:11:30,480 Speaker 2: to go into therapy and I had. I had been 205 00:11:30,520 --> 00:11:33,240 Speaker 2: in it actually after both of my divorces, so it 206 00:11:33,360 --> 00:11:36,880 Speaker 2: wasn't a foreign concept to me. But I am still 207 00:11:37,040 --> 00:11:40,040 Speaker 2: actually in therapy just because I was so scared of 208 00:11:40,679 --> 00:11:43,720 Speaker 2: I'm somebody who is a very positive person. I'm just naturally. 209 00:11:43,720 --> 00:11:47,880 Speaker 2: I think I've got maybe even an annoying amount of 210 00:11:48,080 --> 00:11:50,440 Speaker 2: positive energy that I was just born with. It's hard 211 00:11:50,480 --> 00:11:53,840 Speaker 2: to bring me down, it really is. I had never 212 00:11:54,000 --> 00:11:57,480 Speaker 2: had any sort of negative thoughts about myself, not wanting 213 00:11:57,480 --> 00:11:59,160 Speaker 2: to get up in the morning, not wanting to live, 214 00:12:00,200 --> 00:12:02,880 Speaker 2: wanting to have another day of pain and doubt, and 215 00:12:02,880 --> 00:12:05,679 Speaker 2: feeling like I was being chased. We were both being 216 00:12:05,760 --> 00:12:09,760 Speaker 2: chased by the paparazzi every day for a year, like unrelenting, 217 00:12:09,800 --> 00:12:11,600 Speaker 2: and it just became to a point where you actually 218 00:12:11,600 --> 00:12:13,559 Speaker 2: feel like you just wanted to go away, You just 219 00:12:13,640 --> 00:12:16,680 Speaker 2: want pain to end. And those thoughts scared me. I'd 220 00:12:16,880 --> 00:12:19,240 Speaker 2: never had them before in my life. But I started 221 00:12:19,320 --> 00:12:23,480 Speaker 2: feeling incredible anxiety, and it was I had to deal 222 00:12:23,520 --> 00:12:25,679 Speaker 2: with it. And I think what happens is so many 223 00:12:25,720 --> 00:12:30,199 Speaker 2: times your value and your sense of self is wrapped 224 00:12:30,280 --> 00:12:32,680 Speaker 2: up in all the things that it shouldn't and it 225 00:12:32,760 --> 00:12:34,840 Speaker 2: was wrapped up in my career, and wrapped up in 226 00:12:34,880 --> 00:12:38,520 Speaker 2: my title, and wrapped up in what I thought people 227 00:12:38,559 --> 00:12:42,439 Speaker 2: thought of me, my status that I thought I had 228 00:12:42,559 --> 00:12:45,920 Speaker 2: in my career, in my profession, in my life, in 229 00:12:45,960 --> 00:12:49,280 Speaker 2: my friend group, all of that just blew completely open 230 00:12:49,400 --> 00:12:53,920 Speaker 2: and I had to actually recognize that I was putting 231 00:12:53,960 --> 00:12:58,960 Speaker 2: my worth in something that was completely worthless. 232 00:13:01,360 --> 00:13:03,040 Speaker 1: You had to start at the bottom and work your 233 00:13:03,040 --> 00:13:03,959 Speaker 1: way back up. 234 00:13:04,280 --> 00:13:05,840 Speaker 2: In a way, and I thought I had done that 235 00:13:05,920 --> 00:13:08,480 Speaker 2: work when I had breast cancer. I had a you know, 236 00:13:08,559 --> 00:13:12,000 Speaker 2: I had a year of hell of surgeries and chemo 237 00:13:12,160 --> 00:13:15,720 Speaker 2: and uncertainty, and then all the years that follow you know, 238 00:13:15,760 --> 00:13:18,760 Speaker 2: you're always worried about remission, sorry about recurrence when you're 239 00:13:18,760 --> 00:13:22,360 Speaker 2: in permission, And so I thought that was that was 240 00:13:22,400 --> 00:13:24,400 Speaker 2: my rock bottom. That's where I learned. You know what, 241 00:13:24,640 --> 00:13:28,839 Speaker 2: just when you think you've you've did it, life will 242 00:13:28,840 --> 00:13:32,719 Speaker 2: remind you that you can still go lower things. Life 243 00:13:33,000 --> 00:13:35,720 Speaker 2: course things can and I and I actually know that 244 00:13:35,840 --> 00:13:39,880 Speaker 2: in a way that it's almost freeing because when when, honestly, 245 00:13:39,920 --> 00:13:41,640 Speaker 2: if you could ask me what the worst possible thing 246 00:13:41,640 --> 00:13:43,720 Speaker 2: would have been like to go through a divorce, to 247 00:13:43,760 --> 00:13:49,240 Speaker 2: go through it publicly, to be publicly humiliated, shamed to 248 00:13:49,280 --> 00:13:55,160 Speaker 2: have your face plastered across tabloids with the scarlet letter 249 00:13:55,679 --> 00:13:58,200 Speaker 2: over you, having your teenage daughter see it all and 250 00:13:58,280 --> 00:14:01,360 Speaker 2: have to live with it among their friends, losing your 251 00:14:01,400 --> 00:14:05,640 Speaker 2: crew job, losing your career. It all happened at the 252 00:14:05,800 --> 00:14:10,600 Speaker 2: same time. It was about short of losing someone you love, 253 00:14:10,720 --> 00:14:13,320 Speaker 2: and of course you could always go short of having 254 00:14:13,360 --> 00:14:17,800 Speaker 2: something happened to a family member. It was like the 255 00:14:17,880 --> 00:14:22,240 Speaker 2: perfect storm where everything that could have happened short of 256 00:14:22,280 --> 00:14:25,600 Speaker 2: death happened. Isn't that interesting? 257 00:14:25,640 --> 00:14:29,040 Speaker 1: I can kind of relate to that because after my 258 00:14:29,600 --> 00:14:35,600 Speaker 1: divorce my dad died, or just before my divorce, my 259 00:14:35,680 --> 00:14:39,200 Speaker 1: dad died and my daughter got really sick. I thought 260 00:14:39,200 --> 00:14:42,960 Speaker 1: she was dying, like it all poured down like a 261 00:14:43,560 --> 00:14:51,280 Speaker 1: torrential rainstorm. And I honestly, I've had other times since 262 00:14:51,320 --> 00:14:53,640 Speaker 1: then that have been challenging and have been, you know, 263 00:14:53,840 --> 00:14:57,200 Speaker 1: not great, but that made me kind of realize, like, 264 00:14:57,800 --> 00:15:00,200 Speaker 1: you can survive pretty much anything. 265 00:15:00,720 --> 00:15:03,000 Speaker 2: Yep, that's short. 266 00:15:03,160 --> 00:15:05,480 Speaker 1: I mean it's short of like losing a child. I 267 00:15:05,520 --> 00:15:06,720 Speaker 1: don't know about that. 268 00:15:06,840 --> 00:15:09,680 Speaker 2: To me, that is every time and every time I 269 00:15:09,720 --> 00:15:15,360 Speaker 2: see a story and I've covered obviously of those moments 270 00:15:15,360 --> 00:15:18,520 Speaker 2: and had to speak to parents and grandparents who've just 271 00:15:19,040 --> 00:15:21,200 Speaker 2: experienced it thin well, and I did. That perspective has 272 00:15:21,240 --> 00:15:24,520 Speaker 2: always stayed with me. I always appreciated that part of 273 00:15:24,800 --> 00:15:29,120 Speaker 2: my job because it was always the ultimate perspective of 274 00:15:29,760 --> 00:15:32,200 Speaker 2: at least my children are healthy, like I get that, 275 00:15:32,520 --> 00:15:35,840 Speaker 2: and that Honestly, my children were what kept me saying 276 00:15:35,880 --> 00:15:38,600 Speaker 2: because I knew, no matter how horrible I felt and 277 00:15:38,640 --> 00:15:41,200 Speaker 2: how weak I felt, and how much I wanted the 278 00:15:41,240 --> 00:15:43,360 Speaker 2: pain to stop, I knew I had to figure this 279 00:15:43,440 --> 00:15:46,880 Speaker 2: out for them because I had to show them. I 280 00:15:46,920 --> 00:15:49,520 Speaker 2: had to show them that you're stronger than you think. 281 00:15:49,640 --> 00:15:52,240 Speaker 2: I had to walk the walk that I had been talking. 282 00:15:54,040 --> 00:15:56,960 Speaker 2: It's my cancer diagnosis. This is the biggest irony, Jenny. 283 00:15:57,000 --> 00:16:02,000 Speaker 2: I was actually giving a motivational speech. It was Breast 284 00:16:02,040 --> 00:16:04,880 Speaker 2: cancer Awareness Month. I was standing at a podium in Washington, 285 00:16:04,960 --> 00:16:07,400 Speaker 2: d C. Talking to I don't know, five hundred and 286 00:16:07,400 --> 00:16:10,280 Speaker 2: seven hundred and fifty people, giving them advice, telling them 287 00:16:10,280 --> 00:16:15,440 Speaker 2: how to live better, when that tabloid was publishing those 288 00:16:15,440 --> 00:16:19,040 Speaker 2: photos that were completely misleading. Because I just want to 289 00:16:19,080 --> 00:16:21,240 Speaker 2: say here and now, and I've said it publicly. TG 290 00:16:21,320 --> 00:16:23,040 Speaker 2: and I both have, but we had been out of 291 00:16:23,040 --> 00:16:25,880 Speaker 2: our marriages for many, many months. We both had our 292 00:16:25,880 --> 00:16:28,680 Speaker 2: own places, we had divorce attorneys. Mine was actually close 293 00:16:28,720 --> 00:16:30,840 Speaker 2: to being wrapped up when those when we were followed, 294 00:16:30,840 --> 00:16:32,960 Speaker 2: when those pictures were taken, we just weren't public with 295 00:16:33,040 --> 00:16:37,480 Speaker 2: our relationship yet. But this was not what it was 296 00:16:37,520 --> 00:16:40,360 Speaker 2: sold to be. This was just them catching us in 297 00:16:40,480 --> 00:16:43,320 Speaker 2: a relationship. It was not catching us in an affair. 298 00:16:43,400 --> 00:16:45,920 Speaker 2: But it didn't matter because that's how it was sold. 299 00:16:46,120 --> 00:16:48,880 Speaker 2: So here I am standing at this podium and my 300 00:16:49,040 --> 00:16:52,120 Speaker 2: phone starts just ringing, ringing, and I'm just like, what 301 00:16:52,280 --> 00:16:54,120 Speaker 2: is going on? And I were walking out of there, 302 00:16:54,200 --> 00:16:57,440 Speaker 2: like just everyone I'm handing taking pictures with people, and 303 00:16:57,520 --> 00:17:00,600 Speaker 2: I walk out of there and I I couldn't have 304 00:17:00,640 --> 00:17:04,600 Speaker 2: known at that point, but my entire world just completely collapsed. 305 00:17:04,640 --> 00:17:08,040 Speaker 2: And oh the irony of me telling people how to 306 00:17:08,160 --> 00:17:11,720 Speaker 2: deal with adversity. I had no idea what I was 307 00:17:11,760 --> 00:17:13,879 Speaker 2: about to just actually have to deal with for the 308 00:17:13,920 --> 00:17:17,480 Speaker 2: next you know, two solid years. It was just one 309 00:17:17,480 --> 00:17:19,400 Speaker 2: of those watershed moments that you will need. 310 00:17:19,960 --> 00:17:26,600 Speaker 1: Please explain to me how a false story can lose 311 00:17:26,640 --> 00:17:29,879 Speaker 1: you your job, Like, how couldn't how can that happen? 312 00:17:31,000 --> 00:17:32,639 Speaker 2: Yes, I would like to know the answer to that. 313 00:17:32,720 --> 00:17:35,400 Speaker 2: As well. I didn't think it could. Again. I think 314 00:17:35,440 --> 00:17:38,000 Speaker 2: it was just an unbelievable confluence of events. But the 315 00:17:38,080 --> 00:17:40,399 Speaker 2: problem was, we of course wanted to keep our jobs, 316 00:17:40,520 --> 00:17:42,639 Speaker 2: and I think we were just like, please, this is 317 00:17:43,760 --> 00:17:45,920 Speaker 2: We knew we did nothing wrong. We knew we didn't 318 00:17:46,040 --> 00:17:53,159 Speaker 2: violate any any ethical boundary. In fact, I my parents, 319 00:17:53,160 --> 00:17:56,159 Speaker 2: my family, they had all known that I was in 320 00:17:56,200 --> 00:18:00,680 Speaker 2: the middle of a divorce. But I just I really 321 00:18:00,720 --> 00:18:03,760 Speaker 2: did feel and I know TJ did too, that once 322 00:18:03,800 --> 00:18:06,000 Speaker 2: the truth came out, it was fine and we had 323 00:18:06,280 --> 00:18:09,439 Speaker 2: I hate receipts, but we did. DJ's like, here's my 324 00:18:09,760 --> 00:18:12,600 Speaker 2: new apartment. I've been here, I've been paying on it 325 00:18:12,600 --> 00:18:15,119 Speaker 2: for three months, and you know, same for me. I 326 00:18:15,160 --> 00:18:17,000 Speaker 2: was like, my marriage was over in the summer. We're 327 00:18:17,040 --> 00:18:18,360 Speaker 2: talking about why is it there? 328 00:18:18,920 --> 00:18:19,560 Speaker 1: Why is that? 329 00:18:19,640 --> 00:18:22,159 Speaker 2: And I didn't problem. I did exactly, And we had 330 00:18:22,200 --> 00:18:25,280 Speaker 2: every intention of going after the holidays. We were just 331 00:18:25,480 --> 00:18:28,240 Speaker 2: going to get our family, our kids comfortable with it, 332 00:18:28,280 --> 00:18:29,800 Speaker 2: and then we're going to go to ABC. We had 333 00:18:29,960 --> 00:18:34,000 Speaker 2: our plan in place, and look, we were threatened. We've 334 00:18:34,040 --> 00:18:35,960 Speaker 2: talked about this. We were threatened. We won't get into 335 00:18:35,960 --> 00:18:38,199 Speaker 2: who it was, but someone wanted it to make it 336 00:18:38,200 --> 00:18:40,840 Speaker 2: look the way they made it look. And once that happens, 337 00:18:41,119 --> 00:18:44,600 Speaker 2: and we're talking to our our bosses and our network, 338 00:18:44,600 --> 00:18:47,520 Speaker 2: and they're telling us. We had a statement prepared to say, 339 00:18:47,560 --> 00:18:49,560 Speaker 2: we're in the middle of divorces, you know, all of 340 00:18:49,600 --> 00:18:52,080 Speaker 2: what we wanted the world to know. When those pictures 341 00:18:52,119 --> 00:18:55,040 Speaker 2: came out and we were told that we could not 342 00:18:55,280 --> 00:18:57,920 Speaker 2: put out a story, they didn't want us to say anything. 343 00:18:58,240 --> 00:19:00,560 Speaker 2: They said, if you put out a statement, there'll be 344 00:19:00,600 --> 00:19:05,080 Speaker 2: more stories. And so we did what we were told. 345 00:19:05,560 --> 00:19:07,159 Speaker 2: We did what we were asked to do, and we 346 00:19:07,240 --> 00:19:08,960 Speaker 2: did not put out a story. The problem, we have 347 00:19:09,040 --> 00:19:11,040 Speaker 2: learned now the hard way, is that when you don't 348 00:19:11,040 --> 00:19:13,840 Speaker 2: tell the story, someone else tells it for you, and 349 00:19:13,880 --> 00:19:15,960 Speaker 2: then it just builds and it builds and it builds, 350 00:19:15,960 --> 00:19:19,600 Speaker 2: and once you've lost that narrative, you cannot get it back. 351 00:19:20,640 --> 00:19:24,199 Speaker 2: It was excruciating not to be able to speak, not 352 00:19:24,240 --> 00:19:25,840 Speaker 2: to be able to tell our side, not to be 353 00:19:25,840 --> 00:19:28,080 Speaker 2: able to say, is this a joke? And we actually 354 00:19:28,119 --> 00:19:31,080 Speaker 2: believed and trusted that ABC would do the right thing, 355 00:19:31,480 --> 00:19:33,639 Speaker 2: because once they did their investigation, they knew that they 356 00:19:33,680 --> 00:19:36,760 Speaker 2: had nothing. So you know, we got fully paid. It 357 00:19:36,840 --> 00:19:38,399 Speaker 2: wasn't you know, I'm. 358 00:19:38,240 --> 00:19:40,360 Speaker 1: Sorry to keep asking you questions about this, but I'm 359 00:19:40,400 --> 00:19:44,520 Speaker 1: actually so interested, Like what happened between them saying don't 360 00:19:44,520 --> 00:19:46,639 Speaker 1: put out a statement and everything. 361 00:19:46,720 --> 00:19:48,879 Speaker 2: They let us back on the air for several days. Yea, 362 00:19:48,920 --> 00:19:51,639 Speaker 2: and the weekend happened and I was getting ready for 363 00:19:51,680 --> 00:19:55,040 Speaker 2: work on Monday, and they something happened over the weekend. 364 00:19:55,200 --> 00:19:57,560 Speaker 2: Someone made a decision and they just said we're going 365 00:19:57,800 --> 00:19:59,320 Speaker 2: and I just said, please don't do this. If you 366 00:19:59,320 --> 00:20:01,240 Speaker 2: take us off beer, this is now going to become 367 00:20:01,440 --> 00:20:03,360 Speaker 2: because by the way, at that point, only a couple 368 00:20:03,400 --> 00:20:06,720 Speaker 2: of tabloids were covering it. But when they removed us 369 00:20:06,720 --> 00:20:11,560 Speaker 2: from the air, then it became just a juggernaut of 370 00:20:11,600 --> 00:20:13,880 Speaker 2: the story that we couldn't shake. And then they told 371 00:20:13,960 --> 00:20:16,720 Speaker 2: us we were a distraction. They made it a distraction 372 00:20:16,800 --> 00:20:18,760 Speaker 2: by taking us off the air. If they had just 373 00:20:18,800 --> 00:20:22,280 Speaker 2: said we've done We've looked into it. Both Amy and 374 00:20:22,280 --> 00:20:24,760 Speaker 2: TJ were clearly in the middle of divorces. We actually 375 00:20:24,760 --> 00:20:28,480 Speaker 2: have proof of that, which we had and we support them, 376 00:20:28,560 --> 00:20:30,919 Speaker 2: and you know, this is their private life. We support them. 377 00:20:30,960 --> 00:20:32,560 Speaker 2: We hope you can wish them well. We certainly do. 378 00:20:33,359 --> 00:20:37,560 Speaker 2: And if that had happened, you know, everything would have 379 00:20:37,600 --> 00:20:40,639 Speaker 2: been different. But you know what, I would just say, Clearly, 380 00:20:40,640 --> 00:20:43,359 Speaker 2: there were lessons that I needed to learn. Clearly, I 381 00:20:43,400 --> 00:20:46,360 Speaker 2: needed to go through this, and it's hard to acknowledge 382 00:20:46,400 --> 00:20:48,680 Speaker 2: that in the middle of it, but I actually I 383 00:20:48,760 --> 00:20:50,280 Speaker 2: knew it in the back of my head. I was like, 384 00:20:50,560 --> 00:20:53,520 Speaker 2: this is happening for a reason. It was unthinkable, it 385 00:20:53,560 --> 00:20:57,560 Speaker 2: was overwhelming, it was devastating, but I kept telling myself, 386 00:20:57,600 --> 00:21:00,160 Speaker 2: I know that this is happening for a reason, and 387 00:21:00,200 --> 00:21:04,000 Speaker 2: I am a completely different person because of it, and 388 00:21:04,080 --> 00:21:06,960 Speaker 2: I wouldn't want it any other way. What do you 389 00:21:07,000 --> 00:21:11,080 Speaker 2: think The reason was that I needed I needed to 390 00:21:11,240 --> 00:21:15,560 Speaker 2: reassess what was important in life. I needed to understand 391 00:21:16,320 --> 00:21:20,640 Speaker 2: where I needed to grow, who I needed to become, 392 00:21:21,080 --> 00:21:23,119 Speaker 2: and what I needed to let go of. There were 393 00:21:23,160 --> 00:21:25,440 Speaker 2: things I needed to let go of that I wasn't 394 00:21:25,480 --> 00:21:27,280 Speaker 2: going to let go of. They had to kind of 395 00:21:27,320 --> 00:21:31,080 Speaker 2: be ripped from my clutches. And when they were gone 396 00:21:31,680 --> 00:21:34,359 Speaker 2: and I felt like I couldn't breathe, I had to 397 00:21:34,400 --> 00:21:40,120 Speaker 2: realize I'm okay. I'm still okay, and I didn't think 398 00:21:40,119 --> 00:21:42,560 Speaker 2: I would be, and I was, and I am, and 399 00:21:42,600 --> 00:21:46,359 Speaker 2: I'm better than ever before. I am so happy, I 400 00:21:46,440 --> 00:21:51,639 Speaker 2: am so in love with my best friend, and I 401 00:21:51,720 --> 00:21:54,720 Speaker 2: get to wake up with him every day, I get 402 00:21:54,720 --> 00:21:59,080 Speaker 2: to work with him every day. And when we kind 403 00:21:59,119 --> 00:22:00,639 Speaker 2: of take a step back, we both looked at each 404 00:22:00,640 --> 00:22:04,520 Speaker 2: other all the time, say, I still can't believe we're together. 405 00:22:05,640 --> 00:22:07,680 Speaker 2: And it's not how we wanted it to happen. It's 406 00:22:07,720 --> 00:22:11,840 Speaker 2: not when we wanted it to happen, but here we are. 407 00:22:12,359 --> 00:22:22,600 Speaker 1: Wow, that's incredible. So that all happened about the same 408 00:22:22,640 --> 00:22:24,960 Speaker 1: time you found out you had breast cancer or was 409 00:22:25,000 --> 00:22:25,720 Speaker 1: that before? 410 00:22:25,800 --> 00:22:28,400 Speaker 2: No, I mean I thought so I had gone through 411 00:22:28,440 --> 00:22:33,520 Speaker 2: breast cancer in twenty thirteen. So I when I met 412 00:22:33,520 --> 00:22:35,919 Speaker 2: Tej just as a friend, it was twenty fourteen. It 413 00:22:35,920 --> 00:22:37,640 Speaker 2: was a year I had very short hair, my hair 414 00:22:37,720 --> 00:22:41,959 Speaker 2: was growing back. I had just come out of I 415 00:22:41,960 --> 00:22:44,040 Speaker 2: think I just started my drug therapy. I'd been out 416 00:22:44,040 --> 00:22:45,520 Speaker 2: of Keemo for a couple months, but I met him 417 00:22:45,560 --> 00:22:49,760 Speaker 2: for the first time. So, No, that was a journey 418 00:22:49,800 --> 00:22:52,679 Speaker 2: I took with just and that was a tough That 419 00:22:52,760 --> 00:22:55,679 Speaker 2: was a really tough part of my life. And I 420 00:22:55,720 --> 00:22:59,119 Speaker 2: went into kind of like hyper prove myself mode after that. 421 00:22:59,440 --> 00:23:03,520 Speaker 2: So I started to climbing mountains Kiliman Jarrow and like 422 00:23:03,640 --> 00:23:07,640 Speaker 2: literally like oh, I literally climbed two of the seven summits. 423 00:23:07,640 --> 00:23:11,840 Speaker 2: I've run seven marathons all. I basically when I recovered, 424 00:23:11,920 --> 00:23:15,720 Speaker 2: I just went into hyper mode of live like you're dying, 425 00:23:16,240 --> 00:23:19,840 Speaker 2: live like you're in a country music. I surrounded myself 426 00:23:19,880 --> 00:23:24,679 Speaker 2: with just a huge swath of friends, just was living 427 00:23:24,720 --> 00:23:27,960 Speaker 2: out loud and also avoiding the relationship I was in. 428 00:23:28,440 --> 00:23:31,960 Speaker 2: So I was just putting myself into accomplishments even more 429 00:23:32,000 --> 00:23:33,920 Speaker 2: than I already had at work. Now I was doing 430 00:23:34,000 --> 00:23:36,560 Speaker 2: it every free second I had. I was training for 431 00:23:36,600 --> 00:23:41,359 Speaker 2: a marathon. I was training for climbing Coziosko, climbing Mont Blanc, 432 00:23:41,480 --> 00:23:45,959 Speaker 2: climbing Mount Baker. I had my kids climbing glaciers. We 433 00:23:45,960 --> 00:23:49,960 Speaker 2: were doing technical climbs in the French Alps. I was, yeah, 434 00:23:50,080 --> 00:23:53,720 Speaker 2: I was running away. I was running away from the 435 00:23:53,800 --> 00:23:56,120 Speaker 2: relationship I was in. I was running away from having 436 00:23:56,160 --> 00:24:01,200 Speaker 2: to deal with any actual self reflection. I distracting myself 437 00:24:01,200 --> 00:24:03,639 Speaker 2: from fear. And I can look back now and it 438 00:24:03,720 --> 00:24:05,680 Speaker 2: was all cool and fun and amazing, and I don't 439 00:24:05,720 --> 00:24:07,680 Speaker 2: regret any of it, but I can see it for 440 00:24:07,760 --> 00:24:10,800 Speaker 2: what it was now. Yeah. Mom used to always say, 441 00:24:10,840 --> 00:24:14,040 Speaker 2: can't you just be still? And there's a reason why 442 00:24:14,119 --> 00:24:16,800 Speaker 2: I was never able to be still because I was 443 00:24:16,840 --> 00:24:20,640 Speaker 2: just searching for something outside of me, and every time 444 00:24:20,680 --> 00:24:25,120 Speaker 2: I found it, it ended up disappointing me, and I 445 00:24:25,200 --> 00:24:29,760 Speaker 2: had to Actually, it sounds so cheesy, but I actually 446 00:24:29,840 --> 00:24:35,120 Speaker 2: had to start just being quiet and being still with TJ. Yes, 447 00:24:35,160 --> 00:24:37,639 Speaker 2: we travel against we have fun, but I am so 448 00:24:37,680 --> 00:24:41,200 Speaker 2: still I am and it's hard for me still sometimes. 449 00:24:41,760 --> 00:24:45,600 Speaker 2: But this has been the most beautiful, reflective, incredible amount 450 00:24:45,680 --> 00:24:48,919 Speaker 2: of like spiritual growth and self growth I've had in 451 00:24:48,960 --> 00:24:49,879 Speaker 2: my entire life. 452 00:24:50,920 --> 00:24:54,639 Speaker 1: It's so beautiful how the things that challenge us the 453 00:24:54,640 --> 00:24:57,720 Speaker 1: most end up teaching us the most about ourselves. 454 00:25:00,640 --> 00:25:04,720 Speaker 2: You only learn when you're uncomfortable. If everything's great, you're 455 00:25:04,760 --> 00:25:06,680 Speaker 2: not going to change. In fact, you might be a 456 00:25:06,680 --> 00:25:08,360 Speaker 2: little cocky. 457 00:25:08,480 --> 00:25:13,119 Speaker 1: Yeah, talking about your breast cancer situation. You initially felt 458 00:25:13,160 --> 00:25:16,320 Speaker 1: really resistant to doing that on air, mammogram I read that, 459 00:25:17,240 --> 00:25:19,040 Speaker 1: but you did it anyway because they asked you to 460 00:25:19,040 --> 00:25:19,320 Speaker 1: do it. 461 00:25:19,440 --> 00:25:19,760 Speaker 2: Yeah. 462 00:25:19,840 --> 00:25:22,560 Speaker 1: I mean, looking back, how do you process the fact 463 00:25:22,560 --> 00:25:26,960 Speaker 1: that a moment of professional obligation essentially saved your life. 464 00:25:27,480 --> 00:25:29,639 Speaker 2: Yeah, And honestly, I've always said I can never I 465 00:25:29,640 --> 00:25:34,600 Speaker 2: can never be mad at ABC News or regret being 466 00:25:34,640 --> 00:25:38,239 Speaker 2: in the profession. I'm in because it absolutely saved my life. No, 467 00:25:38,320 --> 00:25:40,560 Speaker 2: I was not going to get a mammogram at that point. 468 00:25:41,840 --> 00:25:44,320 Speaker 2: I think the recommendation was fifty. I was. I had 469 00:25:44,440 --> 00:25:47,359 Speaker 2: just turned forty. My mom is one of nine, my 470 00:25:47,480 --> 00:25:50,480 Speaker 2: dad is one of six. I have so many and 471 00:25:51,119 --> 00:25:53,120 Speaker 2: so many I actually cannot even tell you how many 472 00:25:53,160 --> 00:25:56,320 Speaker 2: first cousins I have. And at the time, I had 473 00:25:56,400 --> 00:25:59,679 Speaker 2: all my grandparents alive. So I always kind of was. 474 00:26:00,040 --> 00:26:03,040 Speaker 2: I prided myself on our good genes and I no 475 00:26:03,080 --> 00:26:05,800 Speaker 2: one had breast cancer. It just was not even on 476 00:26:05,840 --> 00:26:08,280 Speaker 2: my radar. And so when they asked me to get 477 00:26:08,280 --> 00:26:10,640 Speaker 2: a mammogram, I was. I just said, this is I'm 478 00:26:10,680 --> 00:26:13,280 Speaker 2: not the right person. I have no connection, no one 479 00:26:13,280 --> 00:26:17,480 Speaker 2: has cancer in my family. I'm really healthy. You know, 480 00:26:17,840 --> 00:26:20,600 Speaker 2: I'm not your girl. And that's when Robin Roberts told me, 481 00:26:20,680 --> 00:26:22,560 Speaker 2: you're exactly the person who should do this because you 482 00:26:22,560 --> 00:26:23,880 Speaker 2: think you don't need it. And she's like, and I'm 483 00:26:23,920 --> 00:26:25,960 Speaker 2: sure you're fine, But she was like, if you walk 484 00:26:26,000 --> 00:26:28,640 Speaker 2: into that mammogram or the Mammo van that they had 485 00:26:28,640 --> 00:26:29,360 Speaker 2: in times. 486 00:26:29,200 --> 00:26:31,240 Speaker 1: Realy one Mammo Van live. 487 00:26:31,080 --> 00:26:33,120 Speaker 2: In the middle of the show of Good Morning America, 488 00:26:33,960 --> 00:26:35,520 Speaker 2: she was like, if you walk into that, Mamma Van 489 00:26:35,520 --> 00:26:38,119 Speaker 2: and you get a mammogram on live national television. I 490 00:26:38,160 --> 00:26:40,440 Speaker 2: guarantee you you will save well life. Some woman will 491 00:26:40,440 --> 00:26:42,800 Speaker 2: make her appointment, she will go and she will find 492 00:26:42,800 --> 00:26:45,520 Speaker 2: her cancer because of you. That was impossible for me 493 00:26:45,560 --> 00:26:47,679 Speaker 2: to say no to. At that point, I was like, Okay, 494 00:26:47,680 --> 00:26:50,600 Speaker 2: I'll do it. I just know. I was sitting here 495 00:26:50,680 --> 00:26:53,600 Speaker 2: telling Robin I have no connection to the disease, and 496 00:26:53,840 --> 00:26:57,159 Speaker 2: meantime I have. I have two malignant tumors in my 497 00:26:57,240 --> 00:27:00,960 Speaker 2: right breast. I have a positive note and I'm sitting 498 00:27:01,000 --> 00:27:03,160 Speaker 2: here telling her I don't want to do it, and 499 00:27:03,400 --> 00:27:06,120 Speaker 2: I just say thank god I did, because yes, that 500 00:27:06,200 --> 00:27:11,159 Speaker 2: led to a stage two breast cancer diagnosis and I 501 00:27:11,200 --> 00:27:13,280 Speaker 2: had a double mistectomy. I had to do six rounds 502 00:27:13,320 --> 00:27:17,120 Speaker 2: of chemo. My auncle score came back moderate for recurrence. 503 00:27:17,160 --> 00:27:21,560 Speaker 2: So I was on the opposite of hormone replacement therapy 504 00:27:21,640 --> 00:27:24,679 Speaker 2: for eight years. I was on tmoxifen, which is a 505 00:27:25,160 --> 00:27:29,720 Speaker 2: rapidly aging drug. Yeah, at forty I went into menopause. 506 00:27:29,840 --> 00:27:32,040 Speaker 2: You know that's I know people go they hate their 507 00:27:32,080 --> 00:27:33,840 Speaker 2: period and they complain about their period. But I have 508 00:27:33,880 --> 00:27:36,119 Speaker 2: to tell you when it's taken from you. At forty 509 00:27:36,160 --> 00:27:40,240 Speaker 2: and you're told you cannot have children. You know you're done. 510 00:27:39,560 --> 00:27:45,520 Speaker 2: It is. That wasn't the scary. That wasn't the worst part, obviously, 511 00:27:45,640 --> 00:27:48,400 Speaker 2: just being afraid and concerned about having cancer and recurrence. 512 00:27:48,440 --> 00:27:51,520 Speaker 2: But it's just another layer of just it part of 513 00:27:51,560 --> 00:27:56,000 Speaker 2: your womanhood, your feminine way. It's a lot to take 514 00:27:56,040 --> 00:27:58,560 Speaker 2: on at any age. But you know, and I have 515 00:27:59,080 --> 00:28:01,320 Speaker 2: a really good your friend who was diagnosed at twenty eight. 516 00:28:01,320 --> 00:28:04,439 Speaker 2: She's one of my best friends. She's Stage four for 517 00:28:04,680 --> 00:28:07,040 Speaker 2: seven years now. That is static thirty five, dealing with 518 00:28:07,080 --> 00:28:09,919 Speaker 2: stuff that most young women never could imagine, and so 519 00:28:10,240 --> 00:28:13,560 Speaker 2: is she is an absolute inspiration to me every day 520 00:28:13,600 --> 00:28:16,240 Speaker 2: and constant perspective. We complain about all the little things 521 00:28:16,320 --> 00:28:19,520 Speaker 2: in life. Guess what, people every day out there are 522 00:28:19,560 --> 00:28:22,000 Speaker 2: fighting for their lives to get one more day, to 523 00:28:22,080 --> 00:28:25,440 Speaker 2: get one more week, one more moment with the people 524 00:28:25,440 --> 00:28:25,840 Speaker 2: they love. 525 00:28:26,800 --> 00:28:30,280 Speaker 1: It's so helpful for you to put that in perspective 526 00:28:30,320 --> 00:28:34,720 Speaker 1: for people, because we forget, Oh what I forget? Yeah, 527 00:28:35,160 --> 00:28:39,040 Speaker 1: we forget. We start complaining about things and not you know, 528 00:28:39,400 --> 00:28:43,480 Speaker 1: leading with gratitude and get caught up in the all 529 00:28:43,520 --> 00:28:44,960 Speaker 1: the day to day minutia. 530 00:28:45,920 --> 00:28:48,440 Speaker 2: Yup, we all do it. And I'm telling you, even 531 00:28:48,440 --> 00:28:52,680 Speaker 2: as a cancer survivor who is constantly reminded. You know, 532 00:28:52,720 --> 00:28:54,800 Speaker 2: when you've had a double misectomy and you've got scars, 533 00:28:54,800 --> 00:28:57,520 Speaker 2: you've got these like hard rocks, you have no feeling 534 00:28:57,600 --> 00:29:01,240 Speaker 2: like you're I feel like I have two foreign objects 535 00:29:01,280 --> 00:29:04,720 Speaker 2: like sewn onto me, Like your chest never feels the same. 536 00:29:05,360 --> 00:29:07,959 Speaker 2: It's the strange sensation. So in a way, like just 537 00:29:08,000 --> 00:29:12,400 Speaker 2: from that sensation of the double mistectomy, you it's always 538 00:29:12,480 --> 00:29:14,920 Speaker 2: on the back of your mind. You know that you're 539 00:29:14,960 --> 00:29:18,040 Speaker 2: a cancer survivor and it and you'd think that that 540 00:29:18,080 --> 00:29:20,920 Speaker 2: would just always put me like in a you know, 541 00:29:21,320 --> 00:29:23,240 Speaker 2: a mood where I'm not going to complain about someone 542 00:29:23,240 --> 00:29:25,640 Speaker 2: cutting me off, or it's raining, when I want son 543 00:29:25,920 --> 00:29:30,720 Speaker 2: or son, sonny or whatever, I forget. I have to 544 00:29:30,760 --> 00:29:36,080 Speaker 2: remind myself that, hey, I'm here, I woke up. It's good. 545 00:29:36,360 --> 00:29:38,120 Speaker 2: I'm good. Yeah. 546 00:29:38,120 --> 00:29:42,320 Speaker 1: Man, Okay, So from that diagnosis, you learned how to 547 00:29:42,400 --> 00:29:45,200 Speaker 1: let go of control, and you actually wrote a book 548 00:29:45,200 --> 00:29:49,880 Speaker 1: about it Better I did. It's called Better What does control? What? 549 00:29:49,880 --> 00:29:50,320 Speaker 1: What does? 550 00:29:51,480 --> 00:29:51,680 Speaker 2: Do? 551 00:29:51,760 --> 00:29:53,880 Speaker 1: You still feel like you've let go of control? 552 00:29:54,400 --> 00:29:56,880 Speaker 2: I still struggle with it every day. So it's funny. 553 00:29:56,920 --> 00:29:59,800 Speaker 2: I know the line on my book because I did. You. 554 00:30:00,000 --> 00:30:02,040 Speaker 2: I have to let go of control when you have 555 00:30:02,040 --> 00:30:05,080 Speaker 2: a cancer diagnosis, because when you start being invested in 556 00:30:05,120 --> 00:30:07,360 Speaker 2: the outcome, and that's all you're thinking about is the outcome. 557 00:30:07,400 --> 00:30:09,440 Speaker 2: Will I live? Will I die well? And then you 558 00:30:09,480 --> 00:30:11,440 Speaker 2: have to kind of get to a point where saying, yeah, 559 00:30:11,440 --> 00:30:13,880 Speaker 2: I'm gonna die, We're all gonna die. I don't know 560 00:30:13,920 --> 00:30:15,800 Speaker 2: if I'm going to die of breast cancer or if 561 00:30:15,840 --> 00:30:19,760 Speaker 2: I'm going to die of something else, but accepting that 562 00:30:20,000 --> 00:30:23,880 Speaker 2: and recognizing that you actually can't control ninety nine percent 563 00:30:23,920 --> 00:30:26,480 Speaker 2: of what happens to you. And so that did start 564 00:30:26,520 --> 00:30:30,400 Speaker 2: me on that path. But Jenny, I am still having 565 00:30:30,400 --> 00:30:33,880 Speaker 2: to learn how to let go of control every day 566 00:30:34,560 --> 00:30:39,280 Speaker 2: in little moments, Arguments with TJ, arguments with my daughters. Wait, 567 00:30:39,280 --> 00:30:41,520 Speaker 2: why do I need to win right now? Let them 568 00:30:41,600 --> 00:30:43,720 Speaker 2: I actually love. I don't know if you've read s 569 00:30:43,760 --> 00:30:49,560 Speaker 2: Mel Robbins, but yeah, definitely, I tell myself that let them, 570 00:30:49,920 --> 00:30:53,440 Speaker 2: let be, let it be what it is. So I'm 571 00:30:53,560 --> 00:30:55,720 Speaker 2: on the journey. I hope I can get to a 572 00:30:55,720 --> 00:30:58,440 Speaker 2: point where I can say that I have totally let 573 00:30:58,440 --> 00:31:01,200 Speaker 2: go of control. I'm I'm still working on it. 574 00:31:01,560 --> 00:31:03,480 Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't think you need to worry about that 575 00:31:03,520 --> 00:31:08,000 Speaker 1: being the end goal for you. I think, you know, 576 00:31:08,200 --> 00:31:11,400 Speaker 1: stop controlling if you can let go of control. 577 00:31:11,480 --> 00:31:16,640 Speaker 2: Right, is not going to control myself to not control anymore? 578 00:31:17,480 --> 00:31:21,160 Speaker 1: Oh man, Amy Roebuck. Before I let you go, what 579 00:31:21,280 --> 00:31:23,040 Speaker 1: was your last I Choose me moment? 580 00:31:25,640 --> 00:31:29,280 Speaker 2: I would say my therapy session I had a week ago. 581 00:31:29,640 --> 00:31:36,640 Speaker 2: I was feeling I was feeling anxiety, I was feeling 582 00:31:37,000 --> 00:31:40,280 Speaker 2: like I didn't have my shit together, and I said, 583 00:31:40,280 --> 00:31:42,400 Speaker 2: I'm I'm going to I'm going to talk to my therapist. 584 00:31:42,560 --> 00:31:47,880 Speaker 2: And look, I walked out of that room. I do 585 00:31:47,960 --> 00:31:53,680 Speaker 2: it on zoom, and I felt lighter. I felt, I 586 00:31:53,680 --> 00:31:56,400 Speaker 2: felt relaxed. I felt because I felt I was. I 587 00:31:56,520 --> 00:31:58,360 Speaker 2: know I'm on the path I need to be on, 588 00:31:58,440 --> 00:32:00,200 Speaker 2: and I know I'm not always going to stay on it. 589 00:32:00,240 --> 00:32:01,680 Speaker 2: I'm going to fall off it, but I know I 590 00:32:01,720 --> 00:32:04,080 Speaker 2: how to get back on it. And so yeah, I 591 00:32:04,200 --> 00:32:07,640 Speaker 2: chose me in that moment because it wasn't what I 592 00:32:07,680 --> 00:32:10,880 Speaker 2: wanted to do, but I knew it was an investment 593 00:32:10,920 --> 00:32:13,680 Speaker 2: in who I want to become. And so yeah, that 594 00:32:13,800 --> 00:32:15,160 Speaker 2: was my last I choose me a moment. 595 00:32:15,280 --> 00:32:18,520 Speaker 1: I love that. That's a beautiful moment. Good for you, 596 00:32:19,000 --> 00:32:22,320 Speaker 1: hopefully somebody out there listening will yes listen to that 597 00:32:22,400 --> 00:32:25,400 Speaker 1: and it'll resonate with them. Well, thank you so much. 598 00:32:25,520 --> 00:32:28,120 Speaker 1: I'm so happy we got to chat today, like actually 599 00:32:28,280 --> 00:32:30,160 Speaker 1: talk without TJ and Dave around. 600 00:32:30,520 --> 00:32:33,720 Speaker 2: I know, I know, Jenny, thank you. I loved it 601 00:32:33,840 --> 00:32:36,200 Speaker 2: talking with you two, and I love your podcast. I 602 00:32:36,240 --> 00:32:37,680 Speaker 2: love how empowering it is. 603 00:32:37,920 --> 00:32:40,080 Speaker 1: Wait, we didn't talk about that we have a podcast together. 604 00:32:40,560 --> 00:32:41,760 Speaker 2: Yes, I do part two. 605 00:32:42,160 --> 00:32:42,920 Speaker 1: I do part two. 606 00:32:43,440 --> 00:32:45,680 Speaker 2: I don't because we don't get it right the first 607 00:32:45,680 --> 00:32:47,920 Speaker 2: time a lot of us Nope, but the second time. 608 00:32:47,880 --> 00:32:51,280 Speaker 1: Or the second time fingers crossed for the third time 609 00:32:51,400 --> 00:32:56,080 Speaker 1: for both of us, that's the job. Thanks Samy, Thanks Jenny, 610 00:32:56,400 --> 00:32:59,600 Speaker 1: you guys. I'm very excited to share that my book 611 00:32:59,680 --> 00:33:04,560 Speaker 1: I Use Me Chasing Joy, Finding Purpose and Embracing Reinvention 612 00:33:04,880 --> 00:33:09,120 Speaker 1: is coming April fourteenth, and it would mean the world 613 00:33:09,200 --> 00:33:12,480 Speaker 1: to me if you would pre order a copy or 614 00:33:12,520 --> 00:33:15,960 Speaker 1: the audiobook wherever you get your books. And yes, I 615 00:33:16,040 --> 00:33:18,680 Speaker 1: am definitely narrating the audiobook. So it's going to be 616 00:33:18,720 --> 00:33:19,120 Speaker 1: so fun.