Speaker 1: Welcome guys to yeah, another episode of Horrible Decisions. I'm
Speaker 1: your Grandmandy be aka Pantistan aka bitch everybody, it's again
Speaker 1: for my husband. I mean pleasing here. I blink twice.
Speaker 1: I blinked three times. Nobody helped. Oh my god. Well, guys,
Speaker 1: I'm excited we are bringing you another episode of Horrible Decisions,
Speaker 1: and this one I am joined by someone that I
Speaker 1: met last year. But also we just ran back into
Speaker 1: each other. So let me give you a good, warm welcome. Guys.
Speaker 1: Today we have one of maybe are one of five
Speaker 1: white people who have joined us on here so occasions
Speaker 1: shout out to our On one hand, I feel like
Speaker 1: we were listen my friend the Arthur. The other the
Speaker 1: girl who wrote that book that I liked, right, the
Speaker 1: which bitch right, the Herpes girl. Damn, that's up. I mean,
Speaker 1: but she she talks about it openly self. She at
Speaker 1: Lex but that was Patreon, Alex Demo, Alex Demo, but
Speaker 1: that was who Lena Kay, the porn start. That's right.
Speaker 1: So you're number six. We're almost getting there. But guys,
Speaker 1: who we are joining with today is Zachary Zane. He
Speaker 1: is a sex advice columnist at men's health and also
Speaker 1: a relationship advice columnists at Queer Majority UM. And he's
Speaker 1: also very active in the space here in New York.
Speaker 1: And I say that because we just ran into each
Speaker 1: other last week. Do tell us the team a very
Speaker 1: fine man. I can't say that, So tell us what
Speaker 1: they were doing. We want to know did you see this?
Speaker 1: Was there come swapping? How nasty you can share? I
Speaker 1: don't care. Like, what's funny? Is we all ranted to
Speaker 1: each other? So of course is B y O B
Speaker 1: shout out to Daniel sat we were at? Was there
Speaker 1: a certain was it a a theme night? No? It
Speaker 1: was kind of just like Daniel hit me up, was like, hey,
Speaker 1: so we have a few people coming by tonight if
Speaker 1: you want to come by. And me and um my
Speaker 1: boyfriend had did the last day kind of at the
Speaker 1: nude beach together. So literally we were at the nude
Speaker 1: beach all day that day. Let me go ahead and
Speaker 1: tell you before we got uh. So after Labor Day weekend,
Speaker 1: it just like there's no lifeguards, people can bring their dogs.
Speaker 1: And also just the temperature drops in New York. No
Speaker 1: one wants to be at a nude beach with a
Speaker 1: fucking hoodie on, you know what I mean. So I'm
Speaker 1: fucking exhausted. We spent like eight hours there. So we
Speaker 1: get to the house, we eat, he puts on the game.
Speaker 1: I'm like, oh, I know what I'm gonna do because
Speaker 1: I knew he wanted to go to that. I was exhausted,
Speaker 1: so I went and put on my little teddy. When
Speaker 1: it took, the shower came out. We're watching the game
Speaker 1: on TV. So I'm like, oh, I got my little
Speaker 1: my little outfit on. So I started sucking his dick.
Speaker 1: I'm like, oh, perfect. He's like, all right, baby, okay, dress,
Speaker 1: We're gonna go to the Sexton. He knew I was
Speaker 1: trying to get him into the room so we could
Speaker 1: just fucking to sleep. He was like, I just know
Speaker 1: we were going to go in the room. You were
Speaker 1: just we were gonna go to sleep, and I like
Speaker 1: wanted to go out. So we go out um to
Speaker 1: the sex club, and we didn't know what to expect.
Speaker 1: This was our second time there. He actually really enjoys it, um,
Speaker 1: and so he was like, you know, we'll just go
Speaker 1: with the flow. So a beautiful girl, because you were
Speaker 1: also at someone very beautiful, So a beautiful girl walks
Speaker 1: up to me and it's like, what's your stage name?
Speaker 1: And I'm just like, you know, to me, that's a tripper.
Speaker 1: I'm like, I like my name Mandy coming to stay,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean? Stage name is a tripper
Speaker 1: name Bushing. So she's like she's like, no, it's like
Speaker 1: full court and I was like, oh yeah, yeah yeah.
Speaker 1: And then she's like, see, babe, you didn't have to
Speaker 1: be be oh. So she didn't seem like I was
Speaker 1: being so shine, Like is that Mandy? Do you know
Speaker 1: who is? Because I didn't see you with the new hair.
Speaker 1: Yeah you know, I told you niggas don't recognize you.
Speaker 1: But no. The last time um I had met you.
Speaker 1: We actually were a part of a pro sex panel
Speaker 1: together last year in a s W and I had
Speaker 1: the long bundles in, so I get it. I'm also
Speaker 1: naked at this point, I believe where everyone's naked, so
Speaker 1: we're like, hey, this same so so I hate you.
Speaker 1: So we're literally drinking at the bar um and we
Speaker 1: do shots and everyone goes goes back to their way.
Speaker 1: So I actually wanted to start the episode off this
Speaker 1: way specifically because I wanted to talk about how crazy
Speaker 1: people think I am period that I'm in a sex
Speaker 1: club during a pandemic. Yeah. I this is probably the
Speaker 1: first time I've spoken about it, just for the sake
Speaker 1: of like not necessarily that I was hiding it. But
Speaker 1: I definitely know that some people are like, oh, you
Speaker 1: should absolutely not be doing this. It's being responsible, You're
Speaker 1: making crazy. And the way I mean I just started going,
Speaker 1: it's like I'm going every week, but I just not going.
Speaker 1: I've lived there now, by the way, I'm actually you
Speaker 1: didn't know that I woke up monthly. I'm just the
Speaker 1: guy in the gim suit who cleans up all the
Speaker 1: condoms afterwards. Um. But no, I like I the second
Speaker 1: time I went since it's like and it's very different,
Speaker 1: I think, than what people are expecting. Right. It's like
Speaker 1: when I used to go to s W there would
Speaker 1: be a hundred people people fucking all over the players.
Speaker 1: It's crazy versus now it's like like twelve of us. No,
Speaker 1: but we do get our temperature taken at the door. Um,
Speaker 1: And there is we love to see someone with a
Speaker 1: mask on. There is hand sanitizer, and of course he
Speaker 1: has a bathroom. There's a shower if you if you
Speaker 1: feel like you want to get all the way clean first.
Speaker 1: I guess that's usually Daniel. Daniel be like here's a ball.
Speaker 1: I'm like, am I gonna do from the like fifty
Speaker 1: people in the bathroom? No, dude, Like we're not having
Speaker 1: sex right, Like there was this girl I wanted to
Speaker 1: that was there, and then like she went to the
Speaker 1: bathroom for a second and she came out and she
Speaker 1: was like, should baby wife, I'll never forget. Oh, you
Speaker 1: can come go ahead right in. We didn't go to
Speaker 1: bath And I'm like, well now, But you know, it's
Speaker 1: funny because I've actually said I feel safer at the
Speaker 1: sex club than I did Home Goods. Home Goods allows
Speaker 1: a hundred and twenty eight motherfucker's in there at any
Speaker 1: given time. Literally you go there, and yet there was
Speaker 1: maybe fifteen maybe fifteen people, and at least I'm going
Speaker 1: now with the people that I am seeing or dating
Speaker 1: already looking up, so I'm not going and like fucking
Speaker 1: random people. Okay, I did that the first time, don't know,
Speaker 1: but like I mean, like maybe I've done that, but
Speaker 1: like I'm gonna say no, um, yeah, it's different. I
Speaker 1: wouldn't have done this, you know, four months ago three
Speaker 1: months ago, like numbers have been super low consistently and
Speaker 1: things started to like raise back up again. I wouldn't
Speaker 1: be doing this as if I was in Los Angeles
Speaker 1: right now where numbers are super high. It's just like
Speaker 1: you gotta look at the numbers. You gotta look at
Speaker 1: your odds. I'm doing as safely as possible, and like,
Speaker 1: so let's talk about it. How right now do you
Speaker 1: have safe sex during COVID or at a sex club?
Speaker 1: What does safe sex look like right now? Because we
Speaker 1: really said, ain't nobody wear a mask? While we now
Speaker 1: it's actually did that yesterday for the first time. But
Speaker 1: I'll tell you that's a different story's story. But actually
Speaker 1: literally just wrote an article about this, Like I really
Speaker 1: was called what constitutes save sex? Because you ask certain people,
Speaker 1: answer is nothing Like it is whatever you want it
Speaker 1: to be and whatever your partners agree upon. Um, but
Speaker 1: you have people I interviewed someone who would suck like
Speaker 1: thirty different people are like I still think I'm having
Speaker 1: say sex. These are partners I know, these are people
Speaker 1: that are getting COVID tested regularly. These are people part
Speaker 1: of the polyamorous sex positive community. That's what she said.
Speaker 1: That's not what I would say, and you have certain
Speaker 1: people are like, but that's what she feels as safe.
Speaker 1: It's it's that's what she feels as safe. And as
Speaker 1: long as you have consenting partners. The only thing that's
Speaker 1: different about this, right because like when people often compared
Speaker 1: to HIV, it's like HIV, you of a consenting partner,
Speaker 1: it's between you and them. The idea with this is like,
Speaker 1: if you have it, you could potentially spread it to
Speaker 1: someone at the grocery store or something. So that's the
Speaker 1: fear that you can give it to other people. But
Speaker 1: I think we're kind of realizing and I know there's
Speaker 1: like new data and information at all the time, but
Speaker 1: it's like if you wear a mask and someone else
Speaker 1: wears a mask and you're six ft apart, or you're
Speaker 1: at the grocery store and you're not in anyone like
Speaker 1: face her business, and you're both wearing masks, like you're
Speaker 1: not going to spread it, Like if you're being smart
Speaker 1: and good about it and doing the precautions, you're not.
Speaker 1: So I see it more as being between you and
Speaker 1: your partners and what they can send to and what
Speaker 1: they're knowledgeable about. As long as you're doing ship right correctly,
Speaker 1: if you're walking out without a mask, you're going to
Speaker 1: the grocery store and coughing on ship Like no, if
Speaker 1: you're like be smart, be safe, But otherwise it's between
Speaker 1: whatever you and your partners feel comfortable with. So Liz Goldwyn,
Speaker 1: I don't know if you know who she is. She
Speaker 1: was one of our other white people that's right, is
Speaker 1: not bitch. So she came during COVID and was basically like,
Speaker 1: I'm not seeing a lot of people, but we had
Speaker 1: both just got a PCR test and she was like,
Speaker 1: I feel safe. I want to see you. And Liz
Speaker 1: was telling me that she feels like we have so
Speaker 1: much to learn from the kink and b d s
Speaker 1: M community about safety with sex. She's like, I think
Speaker 1: that people need to be consulting with them and how
Speaker 1: they use precautions. Because she was like, nobody else has
Speaker 1: safer sex than people that are into and it was
Speaker 1: a great point and she's like, and everyone's leaving them out.
Speaker 1: They eve been the one who've been using masks, getting
Speaker 1: tested regularly, asking for space. Are they allowed to touch
Speaker 1: each other? Who else was doing that? Ship? Nobody in
Speaker 1: the same with the poly community to like they really
Speaker 1: have this down in terms of they've always been thinking
Speaker 1: about how this affects my boyfriend's wife's girlfriend's husband. So
Speaker 1: you've always been taking into account multiple people, and like
Speaker 1: even me, like I never let my married niggas sucked
Speaker 1: me wrong, you know what I mean? I was like,
Speaker 1: we got to use condom the irony. What I don't
Speaker 1: know if you're saying that you don't know what you have, No,
Speaker 1: it's not that I don't know what I have, but
Speaker 1: protect their wine. Yeah, I mean that's what I was.
Speaker 1: I've been thinking with the wife in mine, I don't
Speaker 1: want to ruin your marriage. I don't need you bringing
Speaker 1: nothing back. And I do have And at the time,
Speaker 1: I was having casual sex not only with married men,
Speaker 1: but seven and my other lovers. So to me, like, yes,
Speaker 1: as someone who was having multiple partners, That's why I
Speaker 1: was such a condom stickler. Now reminding me of people
Speaker 1: who are like, I can't do that with you because
Speaker 1: you know you live at home with your mom. You
Speaker 1: know what I mean, she could get COVID. Man, I'm
Speaker 1: worried about you. Same thing. I mean, you know I
Speaker 1: get that too. I tend to be much more careful
Speaker 1: and like use condoms with women as opposed to men.
Speaker 1: I think a lot of it just comes down to
Speaker 1: the fact, like when you're having unprotected sex with men
Speaker 1: on grinder all the fucking time, like they're used to
Speaker 1: getting gnera in clamydia, you text like like I don't
Speaker 1: want to perpetuate this, like stereotypes like gay men are
Speaker 1: like slutty and doing the ship. But in New York,
Speaker 1: every game man I know gets gonoree and clamydia once
Speaker 1: a year. If you're like sexually active, it is just
Speaker 1: a very common No, I mean, because I kind of
Speaker 1: just thought this was in the community that I know.
Speaker 1: Oh no, it's just it's fine. Maybe it's that they
Speaker 1: go to P Town. If you guys don't know what
Speaker 1: P Town is, Providence Town is in Rhode Island, Massachusetts. That, yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm thinking of probably Providence, Rhode Island. Province Town is
Speaker 1: on the Cave of Massachusetts. The town is like a
Speaker 1: place where the gays, much like a fire island if
Speaker 1: you've ever heard of it, just come together to fund
Speaker 1: each other. Actually, Vinnie was telling me Benny's a friend
Speaker 1: of the show in our assistant. He was telling me
Speaker 1: how oh my god, there's this doc Dick. It's on Google.
Speaker 1: Bit is what is about? But are we to put
Speaker 1: this out there? You know a lot of people listen
Speaker 1: to It's that one to one commercial commercial provin It's
Speaker 1: been there for like decades. It is a known cruising
Speaker 1: hot ST's underneath the boat slip. I'll let you go.
Speaker 1: Five star reviews and one one star reviews on Google.
Speaker 1: My name okay, Daniel says, I only visit here when
Speaker 1: showing to a curious p town guest, although I did
Speaker 1: find a twenty dollar billed in the stand. Please the
Speaker 1: sign open to all lawful purposes right, And they've got
Speaker 1: a picture of Daniel on there that he took. Here's
Speaker 1: another one awesome spot that a bit sandy definitely will
Speaker 1: recommend if you're looking for a real romantic en or
Speaker 1: next to the water under the moonlight, will definitely come back.
Speaker 1: Don't forget your papers. I think people are trolling with you.
Speaker 1: I think not Renee left that review has you know
Speaker 1: a few he's a local guide. He's got a start
Speaker 1: on that yelled certified or something. I am very shocked.
Speaker 1: So when I heard about Dick Doc, I googled it
Speaker 1: just too. I was like let me see that fine,
Speaker 1: And I couldn't believe the dick doc was on Google.
Speaker 1: I saw a guy I like, I've definitely gone, not
Speaker 1: during COVID, but I've definitely gone and like fucked people there.
Speaker 1: And I remember seeing this guy called this like older daddy,
Speaker 1: maybe in the sixties. Like I don't know how long
Speaker 1: he was there, but I see him like finish, get up,
Speaker 1: go to like the ocean, and I just see him
Speaker 1: like ship out like so much semen like literally like bads.
Speaker 1: And I was there like, yeah, it's time for me
Speaker 1: to go. Yeah, I think I think I should leave now.
Speaker 1: But I remember just saying what you saw the semen
Speaker 1: like when you like shoot out, see like you I mean,
Speaker 1: maybe not, it's like this like farting, queeping. You just
Speaker 1: feel like your bootle is loose. I was like, what
Speaker 1: how many loads did you just take? Not that I
Speaker 1: am sex shaming at all, We've all taken our fair amount, flad.
Speaker 1: I've just never seen that happen. And I was just like,
Speaker 1: was it was? It was just an image that's forever
Speaker 1: burned in my head. I'm drinking something like that has
Speaker 1: a consistency of it's oh wait, let me read you
Speaker 1: at Mandy. We could get into renewed ship, but I
Speaker 1: just want to know stuffing to post the real quick
Speaker 1: on the Dick Doc, Come one, Come all, the most
Speaker 1: notorious game like they should today, we embark on an
Speaker 1: adventure to one of the most notorious gay cruising spots
Speaker 1: in the world. It's an open secret for years. Gay
Speaker 1: bye and curious men come here to uncover their quote
Speaker 1: unquote darkness. Much like a bath house. It's often anonymous
Speaker 1: glances and body fluids or exchange more than names and formalities.
Speaker 1: And yet the sex can be passionate, wild, ecstatic, even
Speaker 1: oddly intimate. Under the Dick Doc. There's a magic that
Speaker 1: happ happens involved in our history. I sat down with
Speaker 1: Brad Tantra Code from North Carolina to talk about how
Speaker 1: the Dick Doc can really help men get into the
Speaker 1: magic of sex and when they engaged, and it goes
Speaker 1: into so many stories of people at the Dick Doc
Speaker 1: wasn't magical for you, Za, This is such like honestly
Speaker 1: an exploitative, like funked up peace to write that, like
Speaker 1: like like why are we writing about Like, oh, there's
Speaker 1: a subset of cruising culture and let's just expose this
Speaker 1: to the rest of the world. We're telling you yeah,
Speaker 1: and I go lie, we damn near probably been bigger
Speaker 1: than an article written nobody read the damn I do.
Speaker 1: Have you Have you seen women at the Dick Doc? No, okay, no, no,
Speaker 1: I don't know. There was like a hag was like
Speaker 1: I want to come. You know what I'm saying. Oh no,
Speaker 1: it's not. It's like the guy also described as man,
Speaker 1: it's like a dark, seedy cruising area and like the
Speaker 1: eighties and nineties you also see like syringes and ships,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean. They have to go underneath.
Speaker 1: The guys at the Boat Slip would have to go
Speaker 1: every morning and clean up like the drugs and the
Speaker 1: ship in the past paid at the Dick Doctor. Some
Speaker 1: people like like, you know, no, So all it is
Speaker 1: is like the boat Slip, which is above it is
Speaker 1: like this like barpool open space. And then just the
Speaker 1: way it's set up is there is this underneath area
Speaker 1: that is not It's not like an official place that
Speaker 1: you signed into that you walk into. Just underneath it
Speaker 1: is a dark, sandy area and motherfucker's just no they
Speaker 1: could go there and get they handled exactly or poked
Speaker 1: or sucks or whatever it is. All it is there. Well,
Speaker 1: I want to go ahead and get into our vanilla ship.
Speaker 1: Our vanilla ship does come from Daily Star. Um. And
Speaker 1: because we have a man with us today, I did
Speaker 1: want to ask you as well, UM in guessing because
Speaker 1: men reveal the three words that they love to hear
Speaker 1: during sex. Now it's big. Now we've had, we've had,
Speaker 1: we've had a conversation regarding um dirty talk in the bedroom.
Speaker 1: But these are actually, um three terms that or three
Speaker 1: words that men really enjoy hearing during sex. So before
Speaker 1: I read the top three, I would like for you
Speaker 1: to guess maybe two three word phrases that you enjoy
Speaker 1: hearing during sex. Wait, so they're like they're literally three words. Uh,
Speaker 1: fuck me, daddy, harder me, daddy, daddy, fuck me harder,
Speaker 1: give me one more. It's your pussy. Oh okay, I
Speaker 1: still think I still think it's so big? Is it? Oh?
Speaker 1: I tell everybody it's there pussy. Okay, So are you
Speaker 1: all ready? Are you all ready to find out? So
Speaker 1: for the ladies listening, these are the top three phrases
Speaker 1: that men loved to hear while they are fucking the
Speaker 1: dog shit out of you or damn we just talked
Speaker 1: about I just came, you know what I mean. So
Speaker 1: we'll start the start on the phrase that is at
Speaker 1: the very bottom. Okay, I love you? Oh wait, I
Speaker 1: thought I'm thirteen percent of men want to hear I
Speaker 1: love you while they're fucking you never. I mean, we've
Speaker 1: been married for fifteen years. Then you can say, maybe
Speaker 1: you could say that. So we'll go to number three
Speaker 1: at seventeen percent, as Wheezy's guests, You're so big. That
Speaker 1: was seventeen percent. At six percent, it was that feels
Speaker 1: good sense? And then are you all ready for the
Speaker 1: one that had percent of the vote. I'm thinking to Daddy,
Speaker 1: please don't stop, so please don't please don't stop. Um.
Speaker 1: I think that that makes sense because it lets your
Speaker 1: partner know that whatever he is doing is right and
Speaker 1: making in these rooms like Cosmopolitan normally does these things
Speaker 1: do they get men at a round table and they're like,
Speaker 1: here we are. I do want to know how these
Speaker 1: surveys aren't suck me, Daddy? Is it be I'm so
Speaker 1: try my ass? Or is it d it's so big? Well,
Speaker 1: because one thing that I've been saying is it doesn't
Speaker 1: fit and that's one thing that I know. He actually
Speaker 1: said he likes to here because he hates that I
Speaker 1: can take the dildoes so like I take certain dialdos
Speaker 1: better than others. But when he gets to King Noir,
Speaker 1: like he tried to put King Noir's dick in my
Speaker 1: ass and I was like, no, it ain't been. He's like,
Speaker 1: I want to hear you say that about money, and
Speaker 1: I was like, well, all right, well maybe you need
Speaker 1: to give a break. Let me tell you break. I
Speaker 1: said some ship one time. But I was so high
Speaker 1: when I said this ship, and I'll just be saying
Speaker 1: dumb ship. I let's hear yo high ship, you say
Speaker 1: dar and say. I was like he was trying to
Speaker 1: suck me in. It was like I can't remember what
Speaker 1: was going on, but like it's not that it wasn't fitting.
Speaker 1: Maybe I wasn't ready for dick. I was like, oh
Speaker 1: my god, it doesn't fit, but I'm gonna make room.
Speaker 1: That's cute, but we know, we know we like saying
Speaker 1: paragraphs though in the middle of like she literally has
Speaker 1: a whole like go ahead and do she does her Wow,
Speaker 1: look at that glorious cock you're putting in my pussy today,
Speaker 1: thank you so much for stopping by the Lower east Side.
Speaker 1: So we're gonna go ahead now and get into UM.
Speaker 1: I decided to add Hope Facts to this episode. I
Speaker 1: love it. This one is actually very interesting and I
Speaker 1: felt it recently, so I was like, oh, maybe this
Speaker 1: is why I'm coming so much. So Hope Facts for
Speaker 1: those of you who are maybe listening for the first time, UM,
Speaker 1: and shout out to maybe the white people you're bringing over.
Speaker 1: Our Hope Fact segment is just facts about sex that
Speaker 1: maybe you didn't know. This actually says that a strong
Speaker 1: sense of smell makes you more orgasmic. Did we did you? So? Actually,
Speaker 1: it's saying that it's not even about like smelling lavender
Speaker 1: or candles. It's actually the smell of vaginal fluids and
Speaker 1: and sweat that can make your sexual experience more enhanced.
Speaker 1: It says that there is a positive correlation between a
Speaker 1: heightened sense of smell and having more pleasurable sex, as
Speaker 1: well as more frequent organ How the guy used to
Speaker 1: that did not like me to shower before sex, And
Speaker 1: I think there's a difference between like your natural musk
Speaker 1: and odor and b oh, and I think what they're
Speaker 1: going to say it's like that's your natural smell versus
Speaker 1: just like I think if you just like but then
Speaker 1: some people obviously just like sweaty and if you smell
Speaker 1: like that in a live show, like something like what
Speaker 1: does body smell of my pussy? When I can smell
Speaker 1: my pussy, like I think it's not I'm not not
Speaker 1: talking about like when I'm even equal. I'm talking about
Speaker 1: like just me sitting here, like I think I have
Speaker 1: a nice smelling puss and I like the smell of it.
Speaker 1: But this dude be like, don't go in the shower,
Speaker 1: Like I will say. The crazy thing is like, especially
Speaker 1: right now, like I am enjoying just a sex smell,
Speaker 1: but the smell that actually bothered me during sex was
Speaker 1: the smell of fucking condoms, specifically that gold Rounder Magnum ship.
Speaker 1: You smell that skin would ruin it a little bit.
Speaker 1: What's your guys favorite condoms? Mine, sk y and skin
Speaker 1: And it's had a wide fit. Oh well, I mean
Speaker 1: I like Trojan, I like anything but the Gold Rapper, honestly,
Speaker 1: And I mean I've mentioned this often, but I think
Speaker 1: that there's and I don't know, I guess because we
Speaker 1: identify the gold Rapper with meaning extra large or something
Speaker 1: it is. It's bullshit though, and it smells awful. Let's
Speaker 1: not even talk about how it tastes. You know, there's
Speaker 1: I think a few articles I've read about like you're
Speaker 1: having a higher chance of getting baby after Magnum's really yes,
Speaker 1: definitely don't use skin for what it is worth. And
Speaker 1: I used the extra thin skins which they have. Can
Speaker 1: they have the ribbed kind? Skin actually has a lot
Speaker 1: of options they do. I know who's like skin it's lifestyle.
Speaker 1: I'm pretty sure it's lifestyle. I feel like lifestyle. You're
Speaker 1: thinking bear skin um a lot of the way. We're
Speaker 1: not sponsored by any of these tims yet, but if
Speaker 1: you want to sponsors, we can. Really, you don't know.
Speaker 1: One of my friends shout out to Gucci and her
Speaker 1: name is Anna, but she loves Gucci Mane. She designed
Speaker 1: a uh like a casing for this condom called one,
Speaker 1: and she was like it was on condom Like I
Speaker 1: guess she used to teach sex set and she's like,
Speaker 1: it's one of the only ones, like has the most durability.
Speaker 1: But I don't know if I mean I can gonna
Speaker 1: hold you. I got bored one day on Live and
Speaker 1: I have a variety. Now. I started like literally putting
Speaker 1: either my hand or my foot in these condoms because
Speaker 1: a lot of guys will sit here and be like,
Speaker 1: oh it's too small. Oh I can't fit it, making
Speaker 1: it seem like they did. And I'm like, my foot
Speaker 1: fitt in this one, so I don't believe you. It's
Speaker 1: not that tight. I did my own experiment on Instagram Live.
Speaker 1: I didn't imagine if someone like screen grabbed out of Mandy. Now,
Speaker 1: I'd be so scared of what I got me, Uh,
Speaker 1: making lettuce and making a salad, and I was holding
Speaker 1: the cucumber and I was like, do y'all think that
Speaker 1: is expired because it's when it gets squishy and all
Speaker 1: you see is a cucumber should never be squishy. Well
Speaker 1: that's my point, is expired. And it was right by
Speaker 1: my mouth and he screenshot at it and I was like, Wow,
Speaker 1: people are just gonna think I'm giving dick sucking lessons
Speaker 1: on the internet. Well, there was a there was a
Speaker 1: nice rain for the cucumber and en and go hold
Speaker 1: you on a nice little rain. R E I g N.
Speaker 1: I did not hear that at first. It said rain,
Speaker 1: What did you hear. I was like what it was
Speaker 1: when the raining, I thought it was raining cucumbers. Alright, bitch. Anyways,
Speaker 1: we're gonna go ahead and get into our hord derve. Now.
Speaker 1: Our our hord derve is our sex tip segment and
Speaker 1: when we basically speak franch hord derve. Okay, anyway, we're
Speaker 1: actually gonna give this on to Zach for this episode.
Speaker 1: I actually wanted you to drop too. So you've already
Speaker 1: mentioned that you're bisexual. You have sex with both men
Speaker 1: and women, So I wanted you to provide a tip
Speaker 1: from the male perspective on a sex hip for sex
Speaker 1: men with men and then men with women. I okay,
Speaker 1: so I think we'll start with men with man. I
Speaker 1: think we are so used to grinder and casual hookups
Speaker 1: that we do not do nearly enough for play, Like
Speaker 1: we just like fucking are so used to getting straight
Speaker 1: to business immediately and um, and that kind of carries
Speaker 1: over even when you like someone. I feel like when
Speaker 1: I have sex with a woman, usually that sexual experience
Speaker 1: lasts like double as long as when I have sex
Speaker 1: with a man, like every single time, and just because
Speaker 1: like maybe you'll suck each other's dicks for like a
Speaker 1: minute if that like all to do with it being
Speaker 1: harder to come as a woman, and I think it
Speaker 1: takes more without like perpetuating gender norms. I do think
Speaker 1: it takes more to potentially turn a woman on versus
Speaker 1: a man's just like oh that's a dick and I'm
Speaker 1: hard now. And with me, I don't even be seeing
Speaker 1: a soft dick's very often it's like it's it's just
Speaker 1: rock solid. Yeah, it's ready. I think it takes it
Speaker 1: just takes a lot more yeah, effort and where I
Speaker 1: mean like because also with guys, like you know, even
Speaker 1: when you have a bad sexual experience, I feel like
Speaker 1: most of the time if you come like okay, Like
Speaker 1: I'll go over to Grinder's a guy's house on Grinder
Speaker 1: and he would did not look like his pictures like funk,
Speaker 1: I'm here whatever, I'm going to turn him around. I'll
Speaker 1: sex for three minutes, I'll come, I'll be out within
Speaker 1: eight minutes, you know what I mean. Like limiting, but
Speaker 1: so yeah, my bike surmads like slow it the fuck down.
Speaker 1: We're so used to like being these casual, quick encounters.
Speaker 1: And maybe I'm just speaking to like the slutty Grinder
Speaker 1: community but that is I know, like pretty much everyone
Speaker 1: I know, So I feel like that is a big
Speaker 1: demographic of gay men. Uh for men with women. I
Speaker 1: think one of the big things is sex is not
Speaker 1: over just because you come. I think that's huge and
Speaker 1: I think there's a way afterwards because what I used
Speaker 1: to do and I think it was wrong. So I
Speaker 1: would like finish and then afterwards I'd like stop, I'd pause,
Speaker 1: I'd catch my breath, and he'd be like, hey, like
Speaker 1: do you want me? Do you want me to go? Like, hey,
Speaker 1: how are you? Are you it? It's kind of what
Speaker 1: I would ask, and they would always say yes, even
Speaker 1: if they weren't. I feel because a lot of them
Speaker 1: were baby just like, Okay, he just finished, he's tired,
Speaker 1: he's done. I don't want to be a pain in
Speaker 1: the ass and asked for more. So I think to
Speaker 1: kind of avoid that, especially if you afterwards you finish,
Speaker 1: you're like, oh, are you good, and then they have
Speaker 1: to be like, no, I'm not good. You need to
Speaker 1: finish me off right now, actually, and you should say that,
Speaker 1: and you should say that, but also maybe take the
Speaker 1: pressure off or afterwards it's like you just go back
Speaker 1: to eating them out or fingering them, like, don't necessarily
Speaker 1: like assume that they've come because you've come, Yeah, and
Speaker 1: don't necessarily make it that awkward thing of being like,
Speaker 1: well do you want more? Because I can like if
Speaker 1: you want more, and that's how it comes a ch Yeah,
Speaker 1: just like we don't feel like just get just do
Speaker 1: it without asking. And I mean, obviously you have consent
Speaker 1: in the situation to keep going, but like instead of
Speaker 1: just pausing and then make it seem like it's a
Speaker 1: big deal or you don't really want to, just like
Speaker 1: you're still excited, you're still there, you're present, and then
Speaker 1: just keep going quickly inconvenience. Yeah, right right. I don't
Speaker 1: like that. Well, I love those tips. I hope that
Speaker 1: you guys enjoy those tips. We are going to get
Speaker 1: into our horrible decision and it's kind of called sexplanation.
Speaker 1: How is it kind of called? I mean, because I don't.
Speaker 1: I'm kind of gonna start a kind of I like
Speaker 1: kind of because it ain't kind it's the name of
Speaker 1: my sex column at me, So I didn't, I didn't
Speaker 1: added added to it or whatever. Okay, So what we're
Speaker 1: gonna do is basically sex plain commen dating issues and sex.
Speaker 1: So I actually I went ahead and picked through not
Speaker 1: only seeing what you had written, but I went through
Speaker 1: and picked um certain issues that I think a lot
Speaker 1: of our listeners go through, as well as maybe some
Speaker 1: that are just constantly coming up. So the first one is,
Speaker 1: and I got this one from your page, I'm constantly
Speaker 1: being cheated on? Is it me? What do I do
Speaker 1: pretty much to get to where I am not being
Speaker 1: cheated on? So you give a lot of advice and
Speaker 1: all of the columns that you work on. So for
Speaker 1: someone who's listening and feels like every time I'm in
Speaker 1: a relationship, I've been cheated on, what advice would you
Speaker 1: give them, um to maybe not be cheated on in
Speaker 1: the future or eliminate feeling like it's their faults. Yeah.
Speaker 1: I think initially when I read this, a part of
Speaker 1: me was just like, oh, this like ship happens. But
Speaker 1: I think at some point because I was looking at
Speaker 1: the numbers of like how often do people cheat? So
Speaker 1: if you're getting cheated on five six partners in a row,
Speaker 1: I do slightly want a victim blame you a little bit.
Speaker 1: I think there might be something that you are doing
Speaker 1: because you know, once or twice this ship happens. But
Speaker 1: if this is happening repeatedly, I think this is a
Speaker 1: pattern or behavior. So I think you're either picking or
Speaker 1: wrong people. You're somehow enabling this type of behavior. Uh.
Speaker 1: Specifically for that column, I like the guy asked more
Speaker 1: and he just seemed to be someone with absolutely no
Speaker 1: backbone kind of whatsoever. Like people people know when like
Speaker 1: they can walk all over you. I say it all
Speaker 1: the time. People will only do what you allow them
Speaker 1: to do. So to me, it is more so like
Speaker 1: if they felt like they could get away with it,
Speaker 1: or they felt like you wouldn't leave them for it,
Speaker 1: and then they're going to continue doing It's also I
Speaker 1: think just people don't like that type of they like,
Speaker 1: people want to be challenged in a good way. People
Speaker 1: want to like or want to have someone with their
Speaker 1: own opinion. So I think this guy, the way I
Speaker 1: read it was like, I think the women with them
Speaker 1: were just kind of like fucking board. If this is
Speaker 1: yes man who's going to say yes to absolutely everything,
Speaker 1: let me decide everything. I'm going to start seeking things
Speaker 1: out elsewhereks I want to be with a partner or
Speaker 1: not someone who's always just saying yes whatever you want honey.
Speaker 1: So there you go. So you need a backbone, if
Speaker 1: you could pay you being cheated on, that's the advice.
Speaker 1: You know, it's harsh, it's tough love. It's tough love.
Speaker 1: But I mean this is again, sometimes it just happens
Speaker 1: one to three times, but when it's when you're at six, seven,
Speaker 1: eight times, like every relationship, you're getting cheated on coming.
Speaker 1: So the next one is, um, we often talk about threesomes. Um,
Speaker 1: my partner keeps asking for it reason, but I am
Speaker 1: in no way interested in myself, which is also common.
Speaker 1: What advice do you have for someone in this situation?
Speaker 1: Don't Yeah, it's boundaries. I mean, it's especially if what
Speaker 1: you agreed upon in the relationship is you guys being monogamous.
Speaker 1: Like if someone wants to have a threesome and you
Speaker 1: don't want to just make it clear, Hey, this is
Speaker 1: something I'm not interested in. Please don't keep asking me.
Speaker 1: Keep please don't keep talking about it. And if it's
Speaker 1: something that you know they really want to do and
Speaker 1: this is a deal breaker, okay, then you guys need
Speaker 1: to potentially talk about opening up your relationship. I just
Speaker 1: think that people get especially women, have way too much
Speaker 1: pressure on them from men by having about having threesomes,
Speaker 1: because it's this ultimate fantasy thing, and we've got to
Speaker 1: stop the idea of thinking like I'm going to have
Speaker 1: this threesome to keep them, you know what I mean.
Speaker 1: I really don't believe that there's one specific sexual thing
Speaker 1: that you've got to do that will make someone love
Speaker 1: you forever. Like I think that's bullshit. Good sex will
Speaker 1: keep you a little bit longer, but sex, ultimately isn't it.
Speaker 1: Love is not enough either. There's a lot of components
Speaker 1: to lationship, and about threesome is the thing that someone's
Speaker 1: asking for and you feel pressured enough to do with
Speaker 1: that person obviously doesn't give a because I wouldn't want
Speaker 1: someone to do something they weren't comfortable with either, agreed.
Speaker 1: And speaking of that, that comes to my next question,
Speaker 1: because of course, bringing someone in as a third or
Speaker 1: even maybe a couple is a lot for a lot
Speaker 1: of people. Because now we're bringing someone else into our union,
Speaker 1: our relationship. The other thing is and I'm using slapping
Speaker 1: as the example, my partner is completely turned on by
Speaker 1: slapping me, but it completely ruins the mood for me.
Speaker 1: How do I tell my partner what he or she
Speaker 1: enjoys is actually a complete turn off for me. It's
Speaker 1: the same thing. It's the same answer, you know what
Speaker 1: I mean. If you you don't have to do anything
Speaker 1: that you don't want to do, period, full stop. That's it.
Speaker 1: And especially when it's something like sometimes there could be
Speaker 1: things that are like relatively more harmless for you to
Speaker 1: potentially try and see if you like. But slapping is
Speaker 1: not one of those things. Slapping things that's very clearly like, yeah,
Speaker 1: I know I will not like this because I don't
Speaker 1: like being hit. I feel very uncomfortable by this. And yeah,
Speaker 1: you say, hey, I know something that really turns you on,
Speaker 1: this is not for me. And then also potentially giving
Speaker 1: different options of things that are like alternatives that you
Speaker 1: like that potentially they like to heying sapping, maybe she
Speaker 1: would be more the other speaking, like as opposed to
Speaker 1: For some reason, I interpreted that his face lapping, And
Speaker 1: I mean that's been a thing that I've had partners
Speaker 1: that enjoy that I've done it myself where on the
Speaker 1: tips too, that is oh my god, Like I rarely
Speaker 1: ask for it, but it feels so good to me.
Speaker 1: I think I always forget to ask for it. But
Speaker 1: like yeah, I think it happened on accident. It was
Speaker 1: meant to be a face nesative. I was like, we
Speaker 1: keep going, but I like intense nip nipple sensitivity, but
Speaker 1: I can't handle like a clamp. But his lap is enough,
Speaker 1: it's perfect A quick yeah, did you see that? We
Speaker 1: were like, this was the first time actually at the
Speaker 1: sex clip, did you see when I was flogging? I did,
Speaker 1: so this is where at the sexy on his ass though,
Speaker 1: there's like this whole little like contraption at the sex
Speaker 1: club and so honestly too, there's all these sex uh,
Speaker 1: these sex toys, but he has the cleaner, so I
Speaker 1: put the little phone on it or whatever, clean off
Speaker 1: the toy and normally he's slapping me. So we've had
Speaker 1: constant talks right now because I have felt completely powerless
Speaker 1: with him, and you see him. He's huge, He's very dominant.
Speaker 1: He demands like all the attention when we walk in
Speaker 1: the room, he takes it all away from me. Like
Speaker 1: I feel completely powerless from him. Like people will literally
Speaker 1: be like, hey, you're cool, you're maybe even god damn
Speaker 1: what he bad? You know? And I think hard, But
Speaker 1: the person I'm dating is just the same way. They're
Speaker 1: constantly bringing energy from other people and I'm not used
Speaker 1: to it. But even but like that's our bring the attention.
Speaker 1: This nigga has been named fucking I think even he
Speaker 1: ain't to the pool party with me and my friend
Speaker 1: was referring to him as Goliath. I'm like, Goliath tomorrow
Speaker 1: more bors coulda like you get all of this attract
Speaker 1: and I'm just like, I'm right here. So aside from
Speaker 1: even him demanding attention, like he has that or about
Speaker 1: him in the bedroom, he's very dominant. So when he
Speaker 1: allowed me to spank him, it was like super and
Speaker 1: I was trying to make it hard. I was like
Speaker 1: and he was like all right, all right now, But
Speaker 1: I enjoyed that. So even even I think it's nice
Speaker 1: to take a step back and like you guys said,
Speaker 1: if you don't enjoy being slapped on the face, or
Speaker 1: if you don't enjoy being spitting them out, like maybe
Speaker 1: find somewhere else on your body to where they can
Speaker 1: still get their pleasure out of it. Um, but maybe
Speaker 1: it's not going to ruin the mood for you. What
Speaker 1: an that maybe somebody wouldn't be into like personally, yes,
Speaker 1: and like am I sharing that but I can maybe
Speaker 1: if you could just give us one that was a
Speaker 1: situation with someone where you to bring it up and
Speaker 1: they were into it, and how you combat that and
Speaker 1: they weren't into it? This so I have I can
Speaker 1: say I have a puke fetish, Like I fucking love
Speaker 1: like puking on people puking on my dick, I puke
Speaker 1: on their dick, like I love. Like I don't think
Speaker 1: it's already we already did call him like emin ophelia.
Speaker 1: There's like a term for the kids, but it's specifically
Speaker 1: I like, how many followers here I know, But it's like,
Speaker 1: you know, it's one of those things where it's just
Speaker 1: kind of like it's almost an extreme version of sloppy
Speaker 1: head and like deep throating, you know what I mean,
Speaker 1: and just um, but yeah, I mean usually like i'll
Speaker 1: like asked like well, I mean usually get a sense,
Speaker 1: but like yeah, all asks just being like hey, I
Speaker 1: really want to suck your dick soaper hard, like yeah,
Speaker 1: I don't really want to deep throat, and I'm like, yeah,
Speaker 1: I really, And then you kind of from there, I'm like, okay,
Speaker 1: so he's into deep throat, he's into rough head. Yeah
Speaker 1: I really want to puke on your dick, and I'll
Speaker 1: just say that boot playing. Will you take my tongue,
Speaker 1: You're gonna take my tongue, You're gonna take this finger,
Speaker 1: you gonna take this thing, You're gonna take my strap.
Speaker 1: And at some point like, yeah, I'm ended that. No,
Speaker 1: I'm not into that. That's too much. I said, okay,
Speaker 1: and then they take a step back. What about you?
Speaker 1: Is there anything that you feel like you've had with
Speaker 1: a partner where they like to do something and you realize, oh,
Speaker 1: after doing it, I was you were not interested at all. No,
Speaker 1: But normally I feel like I'm the one, oh that
Speaker 1: gets them to an uncomfortable space. Yeah. I feel like
Speaker 1: I've like brought up three stoms with every single partner
Speaker 1: and they're not always into it, including you're the one
Speaker 1: bullying people. And that dude like hospital Dick is one
Speaker 1: person that when I was dating him, he was not
Speaker 1: into the idea of me being with other women with him.
Speaker 1: He was like, I don't need that, like I need
Speaker 1: to be with you, that's what I want, Like I
Speaker 1: don't need us to fund somebody else, Like I don't
Speaker 1: see the purpose of it. And I was like, okay, Well,
Speaker 1: I like both, and he was like, well, I like you,
Speaker 1: like he's very door ball, but like, yeah, don't you
Speaker 1: want It's like, it's crazy because I'll be honest with
Speaker 1: you with this, With this show, my mind goes to
Speaker 1: like way out and beyond. And it's crazy because the
Speaker 1: fact that my my nigga feels like we ain't done everything.
Speaker 1: Let me tell you, I got super drunk after a
Speaker 1: pool party um that we were with high I really
Speaker 1: shouldn't have ate the edible. So we go home, we
Speaker 1: start fucking and he had never seen me this drunk.
Speaker 1: So he goes to bring me to the bathroom, puts
Speaker 1: a little pillow down from my knees and goes to
Speaker 1: lift up the toilet and me with this fucking podcast
Speaker 1: and how kinky he is, I'm like, I don't want
Speaker 1: to drink the toilet water. And I literally thought he
Speaker 1: was trying to make me drink toilet water. He's like, babe,
Speaker 1: I thought you needed to throw up, And the whole
Speaker 1: time I'm like, no, babe, you wanted me to drink
Speaker 1: toilet water. You're so nasty. That's how fucking crazy this
Speaker 1: fucking podcast has made my mind go. He's literally trying
Speaker 1: to take care of my drunk ass, and I'm like, Pep,
Speaker 1: you're nasty. I don't want to drink toilet water, and
Speaker 1: he's like, your life. But I didn't throw up and
Speaker 1: I was like, hey, I'm not gonna throw up, but
Speaker 1: he like that. I mean, it was cute. But then
Speaker 1: it's you know, I think I'm starting to date, like, um,
Speaker 1: the woman he met there. So we've been dating and
Speaker 1: she's so cute. She's the best, and it's nice dating
Speaker 1: someone who is like equally, if not fucking sluttier, just
Speaker 1: like I don't think to like were I call her
Speaker 1: my slutty angel. That's like my endearing turn right um,
Speaker 1: And she loves that. But it's just like it's I
Speaker 1: feel like so often it's tough when you're not quite
Speaker 1: on the same page with someone when you're just like, hey,
Speaker 1: I really like you, I really like you, and we're
Speaker 1: also going to funk everyone, but you know what, are
Speaker 1: used to that? Like, I've just gotten to the point
Speaker 1: and I love it. Oh my god. When he goes
Speaker 1: out of town and I'm like, so, it's almost like
Speaker 1: he knows I'm gonna be disappointed. He's like, there's some
Speaker 1: bitches or whatever. I want to sleep, Blade Tennis went
Speaker 1: to sleep. I'm like, why go fuck them? Plussy? Oh
Speaker 1: my god, I think like Miami is the place he
Speaker 1: goes where I'm like, I know you're gonna get some
Speaker 1: and he'll call me in the morning and then the
Speaker 1: have and be like yeah, I mean like me telling
Speaker 1: me that happen. It's so much fun and I love it,
Speaker 1: and like, I've learned so much about compersion through that.
Speaker 1: I learned that mainly from Aisha, who I think was
Speaker 1: on the sex Panel that's where you met her. We
Speaker 1: had her on our show. I should that. Damn no, no, no,
Speaker 1: I should she she was there that night. I don't know,
Speaker 1: but we made it. Aisha is a girl who runs
Speaker 1: the Violet b k wait you name. Her name is Aisha,
Speaker 1: but she spelled like y e asa. I think we are.
Speaker 1: I was like, oh my god. He taught me a
Speaker 1: lot about compulsion, Like I first met her on Tender
Speaker 1: some years ago, and like she was like yeah, like
Speaker 1: I genuinely get joy from watching my partners with other
Speaker 1: people in intimate ways, like I've learned. By the way,
Speaker 1: do we have to believe her name out? No? She
Speaker 1: bought our show. She talked about it with us, like
Speaker 1: we talked about the sex we had on the show. Um,
Speaker 1: but anyway, she said in front of me and was like, yeah,
Speaker 1: we made out. I was like, did we? That was
Speaker 1: after I drink toilet water. Concursion is really the opposite
Speaker 1: of jealousy, and like when you get to that point
Speaker 1: where you're like congratulating your partner for being slutty, like
Speaker 1: you're fucking there. And I think what's so important to
Speaker 1: know is compersion. People often think of like, oh, you're
Speaker 1: innately experienced this, And I used to be someone who
Speaker 1: was super jealous and seeing my partner talk to someone else,
Speaker 1: and it was a matter of being insecure, not feeling
Speaker 1: confident in myself, not trusting my partner. Also, when I
Speaker 1: was monogamous, I think I was more worried of theun
Speaker 1: lying to me than actually cheating on me. Take up
Speaker 1: over a lie dude, more than I would achieved you
Speaker 1: fu somebody else. I'm cool, But if you lie to
Speaker 1: me and tell me you didn't, I'm done. And exactly,
Speaker 1: but I think so with compersion because especially the party, like,
Speaker 1: oh I could never do that. I just want to
Speaker 1: be like I was one of those people who thought
Speaker 1: that and used to say that, and then I kind
Speaker 1: of like worked hard on being like, I really trust myself,
Speaker 1: I really trust my partner. I really love my partner.
Speaker 1: Word that conversion. Trust is the biggest thing, because here's
Speaker 1: what it is. I believe. I don't even believe it
Speaker 1: necessarily has to do with insecurity in yourself more than
Speaker 1: it does the relationship. Let's say you could be a
Speaker 1: confident person, but you're not feeling good about this person
Speaker 1: with someone else, if you're not in a place with
Speaker 1: that person to where they feel like yours and you
Speaker 1: feel like you could lose them to someone else, or
Speaker 1: as though your sex isn't enough or you're not enough,
Speaker 1: but that's why they're looking at someone else. They've got
Speaker 1: to make you feel that. It's on both ends. It's yourself,
Speaker 1: but it's also that person. If someone's not making you
Speaker 1: feel comfortable and secure, you're not going to get to
Speaker 1: a place where you won't be jealous. That's why the threesome,
Speaker 1: because they want it is a very fucked up thing
Speaker 1: to do. You have to make sure that that person
Speaker 1: that you're going to have the threesome with feels like
Speaker 1: this is about us, us enjoying our time together and
Speaker 1: experiencing something new opposed to I need. But not only
Speaker 1: that for the men listening, um, it's it's also something
Speaker 1: with affirming the relationships, like even with the titles kind
Speaker 1: of mad and not even with the titles though, like
Speaker 1: with me and my partner. It's crazy because I felt
Speaker 1: like I almost cheated on him. The other night I
Speaker 1: was with my homegirl. We ended up making out, cuddling,
Speaker 1: it got crazy, but she was on a period so
Speaker 1: we didn't suck. But I told him the next day
Speaker 1: and I was like, I think we may be able to,
Speaker 1: you know, I'll have a threesome together. And so I
Speaker 1: sent him her picture and he was like, yeah, babe,
Speaker 1: like she looks great, but I want you to know
Speaker 1: you don't have to be worried or anything. And he
Speaker 1: literally just affirmed like, if she comes in, you don't
Speaker 1: have to worry about me wanting to take her out
Speaker 1: or me wanting anything, like she's cool, let's have fun together,
Speaker 1: but just no, you don't have to worry. And he
Speaker 1: literally like, real sure that I thought you looked great naked,
Speaker 1: and he was like, well, baby, you want to go
Speaker 1: join them? Literally that this is the guy you were
Speaker 1: talking about. She was like, there was a white man there.
Speaker 1: He was tall. Yeah, you look like a whole little attack.
Speaker 1: Even though you're hot, you are not in my mind
Speaker 1: many's white. But he's spore. He looked like a basketball
Speaker 1: player he was. He was like, he's, well, my man
Speaker 1: is a little taller than you because he like, you
Speaker 1: need the wigger type. Though, no, I don't want to wigger.
Speaker 1: And I said, I don't want to wigger like and
Speaker 1: I want no Paul wall Bro. He reminds me of
Speaker 1: like Keaven Love with his hair grown out so like basketball. No,
Speaker 1: I mean he's on the basketball team, but he's talk anyways.
Speaker 1: And his girl had this little cute little linger right
Speaker 1: she has. Like, so I'm telling my man like, you know,
Speaker 1: I've never had pink dick before, but they look really good.
Speaker 1: And he was like, you should go telling this you're
Speaker 1: We just had an episode where we discussed the sex
Speaker 1: club and it was like actually there wasn't like it
Speaker 1: was literally and that was like damn, I actually like
Speaker 1: as itterad and my man was like, well you should go.
Speaker 1: And it's weird because he thinks I have this this
Speaker 1: guard up to where I have not played the other
Speaker 1: black guy that's at that Seth club often. I don't
Speaker 1: know if you know who he is there. He has
Speaker 1: blonde here and UM like literally, my guys, like, you know,
Speaker 1: I've given him permission, but you have to be comfortable.
Speaker 1: But I'm it's crazy because I want an MMF but
Speaker 1: for whatever reason, not with him, don't. I don't know
Speaker 1: where my mind is right now. Honestly, I think it's
Speaker 1: gonna take time. Like I think that you probably can't
Speaker 1: wrap around it yet because one, you're just falling for
Speaker 1: this person. It's a new relationship and you're having this
Speaker 1: new experience and I think the rules of monogamy like you,
Speaker 1: but you're being a monogamous because you're feeling in love.
Speaker 1: And I think that's the other thing. When you're feeling
Speaker 1: like that. At least for myself, it's very hard to
Speaker 1: be like, well, I'm so into you, I don't want
Speaker 1: someone else, And I think this is no shade. I
Speaker 1: think when our puppy loves smoking, mirrors goes. And that's
Speaker 1: why communication is great in establishing your boundaries. When that goes,
Speaker 1: and then you're like kind of out of that, you're secure,
Speaker 1: you know what you have with this person. You're like, no,
Speaker 1: you're getting too bad of an idea, and I think
Speaker 1: you can't get there yet because you're still in it.
Speaker 1: I always say this to people, like people aways asking me,
Speaker 1: would you be open to being like monogamous again, I said,
Speaker 1: I'd be monogamous in the beginning of a relationship, knowing
Speaker 1: that it will open so you can like build that
Speaker 1: trust and do that. And I say that to partners
Speaker 1: to where they're like, hey, we like he kind of
Speaker 1: wants to be open. He's coming from this place. I'm like,
Speaker 1: start with monogamy. Start with three months. It's not the
Speaker 1: end of the world. You guys will live or you'll
Speaker 1: cheat and realize this is not for me And I
Speaker 1: really hate this. You like that why you build that
Speaker 1: foundational trust you know you love them, you've had this
Speaker 1: time together, and then you can branch out from there.
Speaker 1: I would started start with start with what you want,
Speaker 1: and then just reassess. You know what I and I think.
Speaker 1: So maybe every three months, you know, I mean, reveal
Speaker 1: on this guy damn relationship. I want to power point
Speaker 1: out you were fine. Now that we're branching into flights
Speaker 1: opening up. You know, Nick's got a little masks on
Speaker 1: and off. No one's coming down. I feel like, seriously,
Speaker 1: before we get out of guys, we are gonna get
Speaker 1: into our homemail real quick, because our wholemail comes from
Speaker 1: a freak home in need. All right, He'll said, Hi, ladies,
Speaker 1: I just want to start my email off letting you
Speaker 1: guys know how much I love y'all. In this podcast.
Speaker 1: My friends put me on at the beginning of the pandemic,
Speaker 1: and I'm working my way through until I finished each episode.
Speaker 1: Only about thirty five left. Or you got a lot
Speaker 1: to go, let's go. This podcast has opened me up
Speaker 1: and made me realize I liked so much more than
Speaker 1: I ever knew, and I was already into some hole ship.
Speaker 1: Little backstory. In January, I made a tender I matched
Speaker 1: with this finance freak Terrell and my current boyfriend de Marcus.
Speaker 1: I hope these ain't real names, because I'm I'm reading
Speaker 1: through it. So I slept with Currell literally two days
Speaker 1: after we exchanged numbers on a Monday. Alright, bit you
Speaker 1: you real detail bomb ass sex bomb ass head, and
Speaker 1: he ate my ass like no other. I had my
Speaker 1: first date with DeMarcus that Thursday, and he's been bay
Speaker 1: ever since. My issue is this Terrell fulfills all of
Speaker 1: my sexual desires I have and DeMarcus doesn't. With Terrell,
Speaker 1: I've gotten to fulfill my fantasy of eating ass, pegging,
Speaker 1: shout out to you, Mandy, and even getting Pete on.
Speaker 1: All right, there's there's nothing romantic between us, just incredible
Speaker 1: sexual chemistry. He is so open sexually, and I love
Speaker 1: it because I am too. De Marcus, on the other hand,
Speaker 1: while a great lover doesn't do the nasty things I like.
Speaker 1: His dick and head are a one and he makes
Speaker 1: me come hard as fun, but our sex is still
Speaker 1: very vanilla. I've mentioned to him that I like different
Speaker 1: things like gay porn and piss porn to be met
Speaker 1: with ILL, and I know the oh to be met
Speaker 1: with ILL. I guess that's what he says, and I
Speaker 1: know the relationship would be over if I ever attempted
Speaker 1: to go near his ass outside of sex. Our relationship
Speaker 1: is incredible. I feel like he's the one, but I
Speaker 1: feel guilty because this is the only issue I have
Speaker 1: with this relationship. I'm in a dilemma because I genuinely
Speaker 1: am happy with this relationship, but I ultimately am sexually unsatisfied.
Speaker 1: DeMarcus and I have had conversations about different things sexually
Speaker 1: because of this podcast, in fact, and it all ends
Speaker 1: the same. It just ain't happening. I haven't slept with
Speaker 1: Harrell since being in an official relationship, which has now
Speaker 1: been a few months. And it's been and I've been
Speaker 1: able to hold out so far, but it's getting difficult. Um,
Speaker 1: I'm really needing those freak needs met. A bitch can
Speaker 1: only masturbate that tension away, but for so long. Please
Speaker 1: help sign a freak co in need. And this is
Speaker 1: crazy because this is kind of what we discussed, even
Speaker 1: in our horrible decision, where she's hung up with not
Speaker 1: enjoying her sex but this man. Ever, she enjoys the
Speaker 1: sex with this nigga Terrell, but he doesn't fulfill her emotionally.
Speaker 1: But this other guy who's giving her everything she needs
Speaker 1: as far as a relationship, she loves being with him.
Speaker 1: The sex is cool, but it's not freaky enough for her.
Speaker 1: So now she's in the space where I haven't sucked
Speaker 1: the nigga who sucks me amazing and freaky in months,
Speaker 1: but she she feels like she's about to break. What
Speaker 1: would you suggest because we also don't meant it was
Speaker 1: so far. He feels like she's about break and I
Speaker 1: feel for her. She feels I see the whole way
Speaker 1: feeling because I feel for her in the sense to
Speaker 1: where we have never suggested cheating bro so I'm not
Speaker 1: gonna tell her to cheat on this man otherwise is great.
Speaker 1: I feel for her, bro ship. I felt like we
Speaker 1: were talking about like I can't even get my words.
Speaker 1: If anyone's watching on YouTube, Mandy put her hand over
Speaker 1: her heart and she's looking at the columnists. We have
Speaker 1: like hell, so aside from cheating, because we often say
Speaker 1: that communication is key and cheating is betraying, you start
Speaker 1: getting your sex needs met from cheating, you get obsessed
Speaker 1: with that sex and you don't stop, and you get
Speaker 1: caught up. What would be your advice? And then we're
Speaker 1: gonna ask you as well as that, what would your
Speaker 1: advice be? I gotta be honest, be honest. I do
Speaker 1: believe that even though there's not a lot of fish
Speaker 1: in to See, there's also a lot of trash in
Speaker 1: the See. And and you know, like the nigga that
Speaker 1: you have to say you when you have a kinks
Speaker 1: and you know he's meeting your emotional needs, but I
Speaker 1: don't believe those things go away. So if he's not
Speaker 1: allowing you to do with someone else, which much like
Speaker 1: we were saying, if you need to do these things,
Speaker 1: do it with someone else. If he won't allow you
Speaker 1: to do it with someone else, and like you're getting
Speaker 1: to the point where you feel like you're about to
Speaker 1: break bitch, I mean that's the same with like, you
Speaker 1: know my partner now, pegging is completely I ain't gonna lie,
Speaker 1: like I don't even thing, You're not going. It's the
Speaker 1: tightest I've ever felt ever. So I'm just like nothing.
Speaker 1: I don't even enjoy trying to fit a finger because
Speaker 1: my nail don't. I've never, I've never he's not into
Speaker 1: pegging to the point where you, like my nigga has said,
Speaker 1: like listen, if that's really what gets you off and
Speaker 1: you need to peg someone, I'm gonna allow you to
Speaker 1: go do that because you're not gonna do that with me.
Speaker 1: But I'm also not going to be the one to
Speaker 1: tell you you can't do something. And so that's the
Speaker 1: thing too, Like at this point, like yeah, he's meeting
Speaker 1: your emotional needs, but now you have to think Okay,
Speaker 1: So is this man controlling? He's telling me I can't
Speaker 1: do something with him, but is he also eliminating your
Speaker 1: option to do it at all? I don't think it's
Speaker 1: controlling to have bound Like I'm gonna be honest with you,
Speaker 1: Like if someone needed me to constantly be on them,
Speaker 1: I'd be like, dude, I can't like maybe want of tries,
Speaker 1: I'll on you, but I don't want to get paid
Speaker 1: on So like what am I gonna do? Like I
Speaker 1: don't feel like I'm being Uh, what was I gonna say,
Speaker 1: like controlling? Because I'm saying you can't do this with me.
Speaker 1: You're he's allowed to have his bound. It's just that
Speaker 1: the way that she's writing that to act as they're
Speaker 1: like she can't handle like it's yeah, I mean it's
Speaker 1: it seems like an open relationship is off the table.
Speaker 1: That's why it's saying that. It seem like and like
Speaker 1: it's been it's only been holding them, been dating this
Speaker 1: like two months, a couple of months, and she's already
Speaker 1: gonna break at this point, like like she can she
Speaker 1: imagine just like what about your six months from now?
Speaker 1: What about you from what if you got married? Like
Speaker 1: the grocery store. That happens. What do you I feel
Speaker 1: like when people can't like, act on the things that
Speaker 1: they want to, they turn into a fucking animal. You'll
Speaker 1: look at someone, you'll run into a bathroom like that scene,
Speaker 1: and I may destroy the next thing. You know, you're
Speaker 1: getting Pete on the public, not Pete on in public.
Speaker 1: I took it too far, but you know what I'm saying,
Speaker 1: it's like pet in public. I just feel like, So,
Speaker 1: here's the thing too like, And we talked about this before.
Speaker 1: It when sex becomes a lot for you. So what
Speaker 1: it sounds like is she met both of these guys
Speaker 1: within the same week. One the living ships out of
Speaker 1: her and let her live out her kink fantasies. The
Speaker 1: other one she saw is more relationship type. But now
Speaker 1: that she's kind of in more of a relationship with
Speaker 1: this guy, she doesn't want to cheat on this Niga
Speaker 1: to go get her king needs met, but this guy
Speaker 1: isn't doing it. I believe that you have to be
Speaker 1: able to look at something and not feel like this
Speaker 1: is my limitator on Earth. Yeah, I feel like you're
Speaker 1: limiting yourself. You think that this guy is perfect, but
Speaker 1: in actuality, this might not actually be the person for you. Okay,
Speaker 1: with that not a match. And yeah, DeMarcus in Terrell
Speaker 1: ain't listening bit because I don't know. If I don't
Speaker 1: know anyone listening to name DeMarcus, you might want to
Speaker 1: ask you a bit about it. Tom Thilds are definitely
Speaker 1: fake black names. You think that, you think? So? She
Speaker 1: was like, okay, his name is really Marcus, but d Marcus.
Speaker 1: His name is Darryl. But we'll go with any fake
Speaker 1: name I've ever given is so bad. Like I remember
Speaker 1: someone asked me, like, who the dude I was sing
Speaker 1: were these were these favorite black name growing up? And
Speaker 1: we was talking about it was to Quantus. I never
Speaker 1: to this day met to Quantis. Bro. I don't know
Speaker 1: where it came from me because I never heard, but
Speaker 1: nothing like me. I was so bad at lying about
Speaker 1: this name. The guy was like, who are you fucking?
Speaker 1: And he's like, hurry, ever tell me before you can lie.
Speaker 1: I was like, Dike, bike Mike. So bad. To Quantus
Speaker 1: is not a word. The Quantis Kroger at Mississippi State University. Okay,
Speaker 1: is a competitive driver and uh is he he's a
Speaker 1: bus operator? Okay, all right, to Quantis Rashad White, however,
Speaker 1: did pop up for Orange County public records. Let's see
Speaker 1: what he did. Why, So this is probably who you
Speaker 1: don't one time you don't even remember. That's that's possible.
Speaker 1: That's not that, it's possible, possession of cocaine and cannabis.
Speaker 1: Maybe I didn't did because I'm like bitch to quantis,
Speaker 1: I never heard about. But as far as in thing
Speaker 1: as always like, we're not going to tell you to cheat,
Speaker 1: but I think that as women we need to kind
Speaker 1: of be ready to wear that's what man, you ain't cheating?
Speaker 1: Well no, she said, they together the relationship anyway, though, Zack,
Speaker 1: thank you for finding Like I said, you gotta come
Speaker 1: to horrible decisions last year when we did the panel
Speaker 1: and here we are, your lady sucking next to each other,
Speaker 1: to be like like literally like it took us the
Speaker 1: fun in the same room. Bring you on the you
Speaker 1: know what I mean, you know what's crazy, like the proximity.
Speaker 1: The last guest we had, I actually fucked. She sucked
Speaker 1: my man kind of next to me. So look yes
Speaker 1: at us bringing on like you know, bring everyone together,
Speaker 1: you know, um so Za go ahead and let our
Speaker 1: audience know where they can find you if they can
Speaker 1: or cannot slide in them d M s um and
Speaker 1: what you got coming up or going on? If you're cute,
Speaker 1: you can slide. That's subjective. No, Yeah, Twitter and Instagram
Speaker 1: is anso the best way. Zachary Zane underscore the underscores
Speaker 1: after it, so z A, c h A, R Wise,
Speaker 1: z A and E underscore. Okay, And that's on Twitter,
Speaker 1: Twitter and Instagram and Instagram all right, and um, where
Speaker 1: else can they catch your columns again? Like, honestly, that's
Speaker 1: the way to do it. And it's called sex planets.
Speaker 1: That's the best place to find I love it. And
Speaker 1: you're giving really good advice on there too, because I've
Speaker 1: already liked went Do and Red like super dope. That's
Speaker 1: why I wanted you for the advice that. Thank you, M.
Speaker 1: I do also want to let you guys know y'all
Speaker 1: can listen to us everywhere. I know that we announced
Speaker 1: our I heart um partnership with the Black Effect Podcast
Speaker 1: Network and Charlemagne, and a lot of people still think,
Speaker 1: oh my god, can I only listen to you guys
Speaker 1: on right now? We're not going anywhere wherever you listen
Speaker 1: to us. We're gonna stay there. We had to work
Speaker 1: hard nose and one of them was, you can't have
Speaker 1: this I pussy, I p And we want to be
Speaker 1: everywhere because we are for the people. Hoos. Yeah, and
Speaker 1: we need to hear about join us on Patreon. If
Speaker 1: you don't, you're getting it for free. Yeah. But guys,
Speaker 1: if y'all do um want to listen to more bonus
Speaker 1: content because you're all the way caught up. Even the
Speaker 1: girl who wrote us, and she says she only got
Speaker 1: thirty five episodes left, but no deaths a lot because
Speaker 1: we got over eighty episodes on the Patreon. So if
Speaker 1: you want to go ahead and support us and what
Speaker 1: we have going on and and and bonus content and
Speaker 1: us getting some more photo shoots and other ship that
Speaker 1: costs a whole lot of money. Once you you know
Speaker 1: got ship to do, go ahead and become a patron.
Speaker 1: That's patreon dot com backslash horrible decisions. We are going
Speaker 1: to leave you, guys with a five minute bonus clip
Speaker 1: and if you enjoy what you hear there, go on
Speaker 1: over to patroon and listen to us. Also, if you're
Speaker 1: done listening with this episode and you're like funk now
Speaker 1: what am I gonna listen to? Um Periods That is
Speaker 1: my other podcast and UM it's Tales of Womanhood. So
Speaker 1: I'm joined by women every week to share their stories,
Speaker 1: their journeys on different things that we go through as women.
Speaker 1: And if you don't hate men, you can listen for
Speaker 1: Facts Sake podcast with a half white half half white. Okay,
Speaker 1: and he tells us happy he's got a little Latino
Speaker 1: in there. We talked about fund ship, different facts every week. Zach,
Speaker 1: You've got to get a podcast like this is great.
Speaker 1: It's not that problematic if you told a black person
Speaker 1: you're really speaking well. I didn't guess what got cut
Speaker 1: out at the live show like bitch. I go to
Speaker 1: an HB said, I don't know what she said, but
Speaker 1: she cuts me out in Atlanta. But I say, you
Speaker 1: speak well because you don't speak like this. And when
Speaker 1: we listen to us, thank you guys. It's been yet
Speaker 1: another episode of Harvard Decisions. If we're not going to
Speaker 1: open the conversation, you just leave room for people to
Speaker 1: talk ship. And that's what makes its o unhealthy to me.
Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying. And I understand they want
Speaker 1: to protect him and everything, but and by them. I mean,
Speaker 1: you know, his wife, I will say though TLC again
Speaker 1: is a messy bitch that lives for trauma. And they
Speaker 1: had a show about the mixed weight couples. Do y'all
Speaker 1: remember that? And people got bad? Did you care about this?
Speaker 1: Remember that they I don't know who is is working
Speaker 1: there that and how much they pay extra to come
Speaker 1: up with the wildest ship they can. But they had
Speaker 1: a show about mixed weight couples. The fact that they
Speaker 1: call it mixed weight couples really killed me. And it
Speaker 1: was only four episodes. It's called Hot and Heavy, and
Speaker 1: it was skinny guys with BBWs, but I don't mean
Speaker 1: to regular BBWs, I mean beating them and stuff like that. Yes,
Speaker 1: one of the girls was like, oh uh, you know,
Speaker 1: I want to get a trainer and get healthier so
Speaker 1: I can have a baby and get pregnant. Her man
Speaker 1: was like, oh hey, I'll no like. And the ship
Speaker 1: was really blowing my mind because it was only women
Speaker 1: that were big. They weren't really showing big dudes. And
Speaker 1: I wanted to see the opposite because like, I feel
Speaker 1: like in time that bitches just fucking fattening because it's wintertime,
Speaker 1: like we need to know, like yes, like cold Brianna.
Speaker 1: By the way, where are you from, because you've got
Speaker 1: a little bit of Angela and you no, don't do
Speaker 1: that to me. I'm from Georgia though, so hezel Hurst like, yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm close to tellahassee, so I want to get into
Speaker 1: in cinema, we talked about sex scenes that we would
Speaker 1: like to or like you know that got us turned
Speaker 1: on or whatever. But this article came out about fiance
Speaker 1: stars who have an only fans account ranked by price.
Speaker 1: So Stephanie Matto was recent on ninety Day Fiance. Before
Speaker 1: the ninety she was a lesbian chick no excuse me, bisexual. Yes,
Speaker 1: she was a hot not the colorful hair, she's the
Speaker 1: other one. She visited Australia to meet this girl. But
Speaker 1: let me tell you what I found the most interesting
Speaker 1: about this cast member. So she lived in the Yonkers
Speaker 1: and she had an autoimmune disease and she was wearing
Speaker 1: masks on planes and sanitizing everything. Honey, all I could
Speaker 1: think about was her during the coronavirus. I was like, bro,
Speaker 1: they filmed this ship like a year ago. You gotta
Speaker 1: wear masking gloves. She was literally on the show talking
Speaker 1: about how she couldn't like. She was like, I need
Speaker 1: to be careful what I touched and how much I
Speaker 1: washed my hands because I could get sick and die.
Speaker 1: And the girlfriend was like, bitch, you ain't tell me
Speaker 1: this before you gave me the funk right before she
Speaker 1: came there. She tell her she wasn't gay before she
Speaker 1: came there. Listen, I felt so bad watching these two girls.
Speaker 1: She was hot, but when are you gonna fuck me? Lot?
Speaker 1: Did you don't? You don't want to have sex to me?
Speaker 1: It was so fucking sad, but you know, it was
Speaker 1: a big yeah because they were their first lesbian couple
Speaker 1: that they had. So Stephanie's on only fans for five bucks.
Speaker 1: I'm opposed to Linxy. You can go through and see
Speaker 1: their faces on Fista now. She was my favorite and
Speaker 1: I think almost hottest ninety Yes, she was the fat one.
Speaker 1: What was his name? He? Who is skinny? Now? Bitch,
Speaker 1: so let me to boy hey and on FISA they
Speaker 1: were on ninety Day Fiance season four and they were
Speaker 1: one of my favorites. So he's a Latino dude or
Speaker 1: George Shorge. I'm saying for it. So they were Fance
Speaker 1: season four. She was a Russian girl because she brought
Speaker 1: her over to the States and she was pretty, lips
Speaker 1: done titties, like very like fakey Instagram model, but she
Speaker 1: was She wasn't as hot as she thought she was,
Speaker 1: but she was way hot than him. So there is
Speaker 1: one of my favorite seats where they're out to eat.
Speaker 1: He looks at her and he goes, if it wasn't
Speaker 1: for my money, would you be with me? And she
Speaker 1: was like, no, no, I wouldn't know. I would not
Speaker 1: do it. Why why would I know? And then she,
Speaker 1: which I appreciate homegirl, said if I didn't look good,
Speaker 1: would you bean with me? Bitch? Okay, thank you. Everybody
Speaker 1: knows I got a trash personality. They watched me every
Speaker 1: motherfucking Monday. So anyway, he ends up going to jail
Speaker 1: for transporting hundreds of pounds of marijuana, and I guess
Speaker 1: she went through financial troubles, made that only fans, started
Speaker 1: a bodybuilding Instagram account. Bitch looks fire now as crazy
Speaker 1: she is twelve dollars a month. Then we're gonna move
Speaker 1: on to a man named Corey. What a little bitch
Speaker 1: Corey was. Corey was one fiance with a girl named Evelyn.
Speaker 1: From Colombia and Corey looks like he just ground with
Speaker 1: his tail between