Speaker 1: My grandma and your grandma wasn't bad fire my grandma
Speaker 1: to your grandma. I'm gonna say, on fire, you're talking
Speaker 1: about hind I like, go on date Jagomo jago. Hello,
Speaker 1: Lost Cultures is calling, guys. This is Last Culture, this podcast.
Speaker 1: This is Matt Rogers. I just said that, like Last
Speaker 1: Culture you because I just finished eating a TikTok and
Speaker 1: that's some product placement for you right here on Lost Culture.
Speaker 1: You know what, I'm going to have a TikTok? Want
Speaker 1: Why why did I get a TikTok? And then explain
Speaker 1: how it feels when it hits your taste buds and
Speaker 1: how it makes your mouth feel all right, So this
Speaker 1: is of course the winter green flavor here right here
Speaker 1: we go m a blast of fresh air like like
Speaker 1: some culture, like good culture, and less than two calories
Speaker 1: permit to we should say that this is amazing. It's
Speaker 1: something that makes your breath feel better, it makes you
Speaker 1: feel good, makes you feel like ready to take on
Speaker 1: the world, and almost no calories. So there you go
Speaker 1: tik taks. Guys. Today we are joined by a great friend. Um,
Speaker 1: let's look at this list of credits. Let's let's go
Speaker 1: through them. Honey, let's go through the bit. She's an
Speaker 1: editor cracked. She's an editor cracked. She formally worked over
Speaker 1: at Reductress and really helped to make Reductors of the amazing,
Speaker 1: the amazing, amazing, amazing place for comedy that it is.
Speaker 1: I think you read Reductress headlines, you're reading Ana Dressin's voice. Yeah,
Speaker 1: sure are Um what else has she done, honey? Well,
Speaker 1: she's a member of the sketch group Gentleman Party, well
Speaker 1: known over at the Pit. They travel everywhere. She hosts
Speaker 1: open Michelle at You See the Ease and he's open mic.
Speaker 1: We love it. And my favorite, she's the co host
Speaker 1: with good friend of ours Joe Kim Booster over at
Speaker 1: Videology every second Friday of the month. She hosts Fuck
Speaker 1: That Movie, which is really one of my favorite shows
Speaker 1: of the show New York and I love it. And
Speaker 1: her name is Anna Dressen, Hianna Puppy here, and I'd
Speaker 1: say she really does like a little piece of poopy
Speaker 1: because we put her in this crazy fucking hat. It's
Speaker 1: a turd hat. It's a little turn They wore it
Speaker 1: back in the Turkeys and the nineteen on a Scandal,
Speaker 1: Notes on a scandal. Don't get the reference. I feel
Speaker 1: like I'm in a BBC mini series that's it about
Speaker 1: like women who bleed out after botched abortion. That's so
Speaker 1: basically no, no, no, it's you must know now, you
Speaker 1: must well even if you don't know now, you must
Speaker 1: know for future. So notes on the scand Judy Judy,
Speaker 1: it's about when she sucks a teenager notes, okay, and
Speaker 1: so Judy took notes. Yeah, actually the old she said,
Speaker 1: scandal you take notes, and then it's no note book.
Speaker 1: She took notes on the scandal that was happening because
Speaker 1: she's like an old lesbian who wants Cape Blanche at
Speaker 1: all for herself. And then at the end there's a
Speaker 1: great scene where they're living in a home together because
Speaker 1: the press like is hounding them because they found out
Speaker 1: that cap Lenchet like Fox Kids, and she the actress.
Speaker 1: We know she of Blue Jasmine fame, she Fox Kids,
Speaker 1: but the character was fucking teens, and she's like putting
Speaker 1: on all this makeup because she's like really depressed in
Speaker 1: the house and she's like trying on, trying on all
Speaker 1: the clothes and the house she's so bored, and she
Speaker 1: stumbles upon Judy Den's diary and it's like an obsessive
Speaker 1: diary of her, and there's an amazing and there's an
Speaker 1: amazing scene where she runs out into the street and
Speaker 1: she says, you want to fucking me Barbara? And that
Speaker 1: to me is that's that's an addresses brand. That's literally me,
Speaker 1: you want to things have gotten so bad. No, you
Speaker 1: don't leave the house and then you run into the
Speaker 1: street and aggressively scream for people to fuck you to
Speaker 1: the name Barbara and I don't like taking nutes. When
Speaker 1: a great scene she lost the Oscar to Jennifer Hudson, Wow,
Speaker 1: you that was her. Her whole family would give her
Speaker 1: the oscar. She they killed her family. They were like,
Speaker 1: we'll give you an Oscar, but family. And she was
Speaker 1: like four years later and find she was like, honestly,
Speaker 1: that is that it like to pay something. They're like, no,
Speaker 1: would you would you accept an Oscar if it meant
Speaker 1: one or more of your family? You got to go,
Speaker 1: Who's oscar? You're You're very own oscar with your naming grave.
Speaker 1: Donna would get an Oscar for a musical. I would
Speaker 1: win Best Musical, Best Supporting, I won Best Musical. I
Speaker 1: would do it myself. I would kill my family. I'm not.
Speaker 1: That's basically an egot because it's on TV. The Oscars
Speaker 1: has never been nominated for an Emmy, which is insane
Speaker 1: to me. That's true. The Emmy Awards has never been
Speaker 1: nominated for the for the Emmy. All right, you think
Speaker 1: that they would figure it out that they should award themselves.
Speaker 1: But you're the best musical. Oscar is the equivalent to
Speaker 1: an ego because it's on TV. There's music, and um,
Speaker 1: it's it's a musicals and it's a musical. And I'm
Speaker 1: not following the logic because how do you win the
Speaker 1: Oscar for you because it's already an Oscar? To get it?
Speaker 1: You get it? Matt would would you? Would you accept
Speaker 1: an Oscar if I met your family members dying? Um? No,
Speaker 1: I would? I would. I would gold glow, get it
Speaker 1: out of here. I want to globe. Wouldn't it be
Speaker 1: nice to to win an award that was paid for
Speaker 1: by your representatives? Okay? No, train back. I'd love a
Speaker 1: Weinstein Emmy turned back and turned back, turned back. I
Speaker 1: think you're saying I want to Weinstein. I want to wine.
Speaker 1: Throw your weight wine on me. I want one okay,
Speaker 1: speaking of Jennifer Headset, the reason why, uh why Lost
Speaker 1: Culture Ristos gathers bi weekly is to talk about the
Speaker 1: big cultural events that have been happening. And I wanted
Speaker 1: to discuss the end of American Idol because I feel
Speaker 1: like it's you know, culture dot com, that's American Idol.
Speaker 1: I mean, it's crazy that it ended like that's a
Speaker 1: big time. But then I heard from Bowen that he
Speaker 1: actually he said, quote shockingly, I don't I've never watched
Speaker 1: that much American Idol. I don't know much about saying
Speaker 1: the TV shows. And then Anna says she doesn't know
Speaker 1: about it either, So what are we gonna do about
Speaker 1: I've seen so many clips of it. I've probably seen
Speaker 1: the entire series, but in a series of like YouTube
Speaker 1: clips that I watch on my phone at like seven
Speaker 1: in the morning when I'm not quite ready to wake up, right,
Speaker 1: And that is and that is a great um summarine
Speaker 1: assessment of the whole series. I think it's it's something
Speaker 1: that you would watch that ended up sort of fragmenting
Speaker 1: culture in a way. When don't you say so? We've
Speaker 1: said in the past on this show, in our very
Speaker 1: first episode that American Idol invented common culture. We do.
Speaker 1: We do think that like people being so confident in
Speaker 1: I think started like when everyone was like, look how
Speaker 1: funny it is for that to happen to all these people,
Speaker 1: and like on a mass level, I think like American
Speaker 1: Idol did have a lot to do with that. So
Speaker 1: it's really interesting, Yeah, because you're watching people watching something exactly,
Speaker 1: You're watching people watch something and then say what they
Speaker 1: do and do not like about it, which is in
Speaker 1: no way natural. That is YouTube but must be. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and three people who probably shouldn't have ever been asked
Speaker 1: to give to give feedback to profession I mean, how
Speaker 1: did the three of them? What was the elimination process?
Speaker 1: Like I think that is I mean, we take it.
Speaker 1: It's such a it's such a meme, the three of them,
Speaker 1: but like, you know, well, it's kind of interesting because
Speaker 1: I think they were trying to come at it from
Speaker 1: like three different perspectives, which is like a producer and
Speaker 1: executive and an artist. But what they got was like
Speaker 1: this producer who, to be honest with you, like Simon Cowell.
Speaker 1: I think he was peripherally involved with the Spice Girls,
Speaker 1: but he never really broke huge music artist. It wasn't
Speaker 1: like they had like l A Read on the show
Speaker 1: or Clive Davis. It wasn't like he was this pioneer
Speaker 1: in creating artist. So they got kind of a B
Speaker 1: level executive in that regard who had a great personality
Speaker 1: for television. I guess Randy Jackson. I mean sure, I
Speaker 1: guess he was involved in the music industry, but he
Speaker 1: was definitely like the least exciting personality of the three
Speaker 1: of them. And Paula Abdul, Sure, you've got a musical artist,
Speaker 1: I guess, But she can she competently judge singing? No,
Speaker 1: she wasn't. She was. She was never a good vocalist,
Speaker 1: not known for that. And like you know what, I
Speaker 1: also know a lot of really shitty comedians, but and
Speaker 1: like they the thing about them is like there are
Speaker 1: around comedy all the time. So it's like, even if
Speaker 1: Paula Abdul is not a good singer, like she's around
Speaker 1: a lot of singers. I guess she's a lot of
Speaker 1: performance I'm playing Devil's advocate with myself, which is I think, Yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean she she definitely you could say she had
Speaker 1: an insider's point of view, and I get it, Like
Speaker 1: but then years later, you know, they did have like
Speaker 1: the singer of all singers, Mariah Carry, judged the show
Speaker 1: years later, and she, I guess, was also an awful judge,
Speaker 1: probably worse than Paul Abdul, so I guess it doesn't
Speaker 1: really matter. I feel like none of the judges after
Speaker 1: the original three were good. But anyway, let's some let's
Speaker 1: let's should we start from the very beginnings of the show.
Speaker 1: I mean, I guess that's that's that's well. I basically
Speaker 1: just wanted to just talk about the fact that it's
Speaker 1: over and like now to do like a porch more
Speaker 1: post Porsche mortem, like a post mortem on the show
Speaker 1: I remember, And I do agree with you. I think
Speaker 1: that it's something that everyone's at least like familiar with
Speaker 1: in some way, Like there was a time when it
Speaker 1: was inescapable, and I do think everybody legitimately watched it,
Speaker 1: I guess when we were like in fucking middle school
Speaker 1: or something, when it was just on the television. But
Speaker 1: isn't it funny that like that kind of thing, like
Speaker 1: watching people get judged get judged, became like the number
Speaker 1: one thing for Americans to do. Like that's kind of
Speaker 1: funny to me, it's kind of interesting. I think it
Speaker 1: says a lot. We also love putting numbers on the
Speaker 1: fronts of people's bodies. Yeah, that's true, cattle. That's such
Speaker 1: an American thing. Marathon's beauty pageants, American idol. Of course.
Speaker 1: Marathon started in America, the marathon in New York City,
Speaker 1: and that was how running started. They said good, Yeah,
Speaker 1: they said, good, this is good. Let's keep doing this
Speaker 1: every year. They said, yeah. There's actually a rule if
Speaker 1: you don't if you finish a marathon and you don't
Speaker 1: say I like this, it doesn't count your it's discoved.
Speaker 1: And most people aren't told that, so their first marathon
Speaker 1: is sort of like a test roond and then yeah,
Speaker 1: and they don't stop the clock until they said I've
Speaker 1: liked this. Yeah, So that's why people's times are so high,
Speaker 1: that's why. And they'll never reveal the really everyone finishes
Speaker 1: the marathon in like they just forget to say they
Speaker 1: forget they like that, They say I like this, and
Speaker 1: then five hours later they're like wrapped in a tinfoil
Speaker 1: blanket drinking a beer and someone's like, what can I
Speaker 1: go a tangent on tinfoil blankets really quick? One time
Speaker 1: they wrapped me in a tinfoil blanket because I had
Speaker 1: a panic attack a track camp and they wrapped me
Speaker 1: in a tinfoil blanket. And this is actually kind of
Speaker 1: tangential to the running thing and the tinfoil blanket because
Speaker 1: I was at track camp. I'm gonna bravely share this story.
Speaker 1: I had an anxiety attack a track camp because I
Speaker 1: got very sick one day and I was like a
Speaker 1: sophomore in high school and I was really very closeted,
Speaker 1: and I all my friends kind of bailed on the
Speaker 1: track camp, so I went alone. And it was a
Speaker 1: week like an upstate New York and I was really
Speaker 1: kind of kind of irritated because I was going to
Speaker 1: be by myself, and I was very nervous because I
Speaker 1: didn't like really make a new friends stuff like that.
Speaker 1: Sleepaway camp really hurt really really hard. Everyone sticks are
Speaker 1: waggling around. Yeah, it's tough. And there was this one
Speaker 1: girl from like a neighboring town. I think that kind
Speaker 1: of got a crush on me. And I actually recognized
Speaker 1: her because I had seen her across the stadium at
Speaker 1: an O A R. Concert. Oh all right, so this
Speaker 1: is to start from the beginning. I was at an
Speaker 1: O R concert with all my friends on August twelve,
Speaker 1: two thousand five, six six, and we all want to
Speaker 1: go see O R. With opening act Jack's mannequin, which
Speaker 1: is the most long island thing. I think it was
Speaker 1: August twelve. I think that's um. I think that's the
Speaker 1: day I got fingered for the first time. Oh yeah,
Speaker 1: so so milestones and that was the day that you
Speaker 1: know that because you scrawled it in with your own
Speaker 1: nail on your and he was upset, stopped, what are
Speaker 1: you doing? Never mind? I was like, no, it's on
Speaker 1: a scandal, on scandal. That was the day that I
Speaker 1: was in China, And my my cousin said for the
Speaker 1: first time, but when you talk like a girl, So
Speaker 1: that's that was a big day for me too. But
Speaker 1: going so anyway, I saw this girl across like we
Speaker 1: were like in the slight mezzanine and she was like
Speaker 1: in the end of the ground floor. And so my
Speaker 1: friend my friends were like, yo, those girls are like
Speaker 1: said whatever straight men say about women, those girls, and
Speaker 1: so they turned around and we were just like and
Speaker 1: it was just like that idiosy. So like I remember,
Speaker 1: like I clocked what she looked like and then like
Speaker 1: months later, no, actually like weeks, weeks later, you clocked
Speaker 1: the look. Weeks later, I went to track camp and
Speaker 1: I clocked the face and I was like, oh my god,
Speaker 1: that's that girl from the O I R. Concert And
Speaker 1: she was she was just as surprised to see me.
Speaker 1: And it was like basically Sandy and Danny but a
Speaker 1: hell escape. Yeah. So it was like I was like
Speaker 1: in hell absolute how because I was like I had
Speaker 1: like flirted with her across the stadium, because you can't
Speaker 1: do anything sexual across the stadium. That's perfect for gay man.
Speaker 1: I say, you, hundreds of yards away, this is the
Speaker 1: most it will ever get. I probably honestly did like
Speaker 1: the gross like pussy things. Actually, the story gets really dark.
Speaker 1: I'll keeping, god, how old are you? I was sixteen,
Speaker 1: so very very Long Island closets from Long Island too,
Speaker 1: so sorry. Um. So, basically, like she gets to the
Speaker 1: track camp, we see each other, and I freak out
Speaker 1: and I started, I start to really panick, but we
Speaker 1: kind of start to become friends. But her friends come
Speaker 1: over to our like bunk a lot to talk to
Speaker 1: us of a different girl, know, the same girl, very girl.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, they broke all the rules. So basically three
Speaker 1: days in was like the big track camp dance where
Speaker 1: they were going to where they were going to serve
Speaker 1: like milkshakes and it was like a social but there'd
Speaker 1: also be a DJ kind of campuses. It was ridiculous.
Speaker 1: So basically, so you have warm I don't know, but
Speaker 1: it was. I remember it was such a big deal.
Speaker 1: We were getting milkshakes. That's that's insane. So we um,
Speaker 1: We're all like at the camp and we're at the
Speaker 1: camp dance and like they I'm in my bunk because
Speaker 1: I'm not leaving the bunk. I'm like, I'm sick, and
Speaker 1: they were like, no, you have to come out, and
Speaker 1: I had been making up that I was sick. So
Speaker 1: I got. I got to the dance and I like
Speaker 1: danced with her or whatever, and we like grinding and
Speaker 1: the whole thing to the point where I was able
Speaker 1: to grind with her but like and it was like
Speaker 1: non sexual enough where I could like convince everyone I
Speaker 1: was enjoying it. And one of the camp counselors came
Speaker 1: over and shine a flashlight on us, which means you
Speaker 1: had to back up. So I was like, I guess
Speaker 1: we have to stop, and I went back to my bunk,
Speaker 1: and it was like convinced them. So basically the next day,
Speaker 1: I wake up in like with like a hundred three fever, horrible, horrible,
Speaker 1: like my like in stitches, like from from something. So
Speaker 1: I go to the infirmary which they had set up,
Speaker 1: and then nurse practitioner was there like all right, let's
Speaker 1: do this, this, this, and she took my temperature and
Speaker 1: I'm miraculously somehow didn't have a fever. But I felt horrible.
Speaker 1: So I went back to my bunk. Was miserable, back
Speaker 1: and forth and back and forth because I can't run,
Speaker 1: so I'm just like literally doubled over in pain. I
Speaker 1: go to the nurse practitioner like a fourth time, and
Speaker 1: she says to me, she looks at me in the eyes,
Speaker 1: and she goes, is this the first time you've been
Speaker 1: away from home? And literally the second she said that,
Speaker 1: I hit the ground and I had full body convulsion
Speaker 1: and I lost complete control of my body. I had
Speaker 1: to rip all my clothes off on the spot. I
Speaker 1: started sweating through my skin. I started shaking uncontrollably and
Speaker 1: proceeded to not stop shaking for an hour and a
Speaker 1: half and they had to wrap me a metal sheet
Speaker 1: and I was like in front of all these kids
Speaker 1: that were just having like um, you know, like they
Speaker 1: were like cramping up or something, and I'm literally and
Speaker 1: let somebody who would like to be And so I'm
Speaker 1: literally there like having a complete what I think is
Speaker 1: mental breakdown, asking the woman if I am going to
Speaker 1: die because because I really didn't know what was going on,
Speaker 1: I didn't know and the worst thing they could have
Speaker 1: done they did to me, which was as it was happening,
Speaker 1: they looked at me dead in the eyes and held
Speaker 1: my shoulders back and went, you're having on an attack
Speaker 1: and I was like, oh my god. And They're like
Speaker 1: and then basically once I finally stopped freaking out, they
Speaker 1: were like, yeah, basically we think that you're sick because
Speaker 1: you're very anxious about being away from home in your
Speaker 1: mind is creating all this stuff. And I was like, well,
Speaker 1: all I know is one thing, which is called my parents,
Speaker 1: like I'm getting because they had repeatedly up until that
Speaker 1: point said no, no, no, because they didn't want me
Speaker 1: to ask for my money back, I was like, I'm
Speaker 1: not going to ask my money back. I just want
Speaker 1: to go home. So they came and get me and
Speaker 1: they took me home. The leader of the track camp,
Speaker 1: who was like this track sense a goes to me
Speaker 1: before I left, what are you going to do in college?
Speaker 1: How will you last? I can't make it. One week,
Speaker 1: I was like, I'm sick. And my parents had such
Speaker 1: a fight in the car home because I guess my
Speaker 1: mom was like upset that my dad had and said something.
Speaker 1: But I think we're all in just such shock that
Speaker 1: he was doing this. So, oh my god, this ended
Speaker 1: up being such a longer thing. But I have to
Speaker 1: tell this last part of the story because I think
Speaker 1: it's insane. So the girl is crying as I'm leaving,
Speaker 1: like it's like it's like, oh my god, It's it's
Speaker 1: as if the breakup. It's as if, you know, she
Speaker 1: was like discovering like super power. It's as if like
Speaker 1: we had been all summer and this was like me
Speaker 1: being taken away. It was like when you're a kid
Speaker 1: and you move away to a new town. It's the
Speaker 1: way your best friend. She's crying, crying, So I gave
Speaker 1: her my phone numb at some point because we had
Speaker 1: just all gone cell phones. So I got back till
Speaker 1: it got to Long Island. Then a few weeks go
Speaker 1: by and she's texting me a lot. So at the time,
Speaker 1: I had this friend Ryan, who was like a year
Speaker 1: older than me. He had a car, so we were
Speaker 1: like and he was really interested like going on on
Speaker 1: dates with girls at the time. Sound was like, this
Speaker 1: girl really wants to hang out, maybe we should go
Speaker 1: do it. So we went to go hang out and
Speaker 1: we went to the ground Round. What's that good? It's
Speaker 1: like a Friday's restaurant. I'm sure it was the Gun.
Speaker 1: It was like the one in when Yeah, near the mall,
Speaker 1: ye Nell. So basically like we went to ground Round.
Speaker 1: We drove around for a little bit. We dropped them off,
Speaker 1: and Ryan says to me after, uh, honestly, I did
Speaker 1: not like hanging out with them, and I was like
Speaker 1: why and he was like nothing happened, and I was
Speaker 1: like okay. And then I think he also had a
Speaker 1: problem with the fact that I think she was like mixed.
Speaker 1: I think she was like a mixed race, like black white.
Speaker 1: And of course this is Long Island, so everyone's a
Speaker 1: fucking idiot, just like an open races. So like basically
Speaker 1: like it was she black. I don't even know, and
Speaker 1: I was like, oh my god, and like the voice
Speaker 1: inside me that would become like who I am now
Speaker 1: was like, what the funk is this? What? Get like,
Speaker 1: get out of this stupid fucking town. But me, I
Speaker 1: was like, oh, yeah, I don't know, maybe it was
Speaker 1: weird whatever. And then two days later, it was still
Speaker 1: the weekend because we had like a long weekend, they
Speaker 1: texted again and said, do you guys want to hang
Speaker 1: out with us? And Ryan literally said to me, oh.
Speaker 1: He literally said to me, tell them that I'll hang
Speaker 1: out with him if they stuck our dicks. And I
Speaker 1: was like, I am not going to tell her that,
Speaker 1: and he was like, honest, I don't know why you
Speaker 1: won't say it. They probably will be down to do it.
Speaker 1: So sixteen year old me, so brainwashed by Long Island,
Speaker 1: ended up doing that. I was like, we'll hang out
Speaker 1: with you if you suck our dicks and they didn't
Speaker 1: respond for a while, and then they finally did respond
Speaker 1: and the only thing they said was when, And I
Speaker 1: was like, and I literally when they said that, because
Speaker 1: it was so sad. I could just feel how sad
Speaker 1: it was. I was like, I'm so sorry. Ryan took
Speaker 1: my phone and sent that like that is that was
Speaker 1: just a joke. That's not the way it is blah
Speaker 1: blah blah blah blah. And I felt so shitty that
Speaker 1: I said him that text and I was like goodbye.
Speaker 1: So um and then I remember, uh, like weeks later,
Speaker 1: they were texting me again to hang out, and I
Speaker 1: was like, these girls have no idea like what it
Speaker 1: means to be like they were. We just like, here's
Speaker 1: the thing. If you send your daughters to the ground round,
Speaker 1: they're gonna come out a bunch of painted harlots who
Speaker 1: are hungry for media grade steaks and sixteen year old
Speaker 1: old Absolutely, but can you believe that? No? I mean, yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm from Long Island. Yeah, Like all of my friends
Speaker 1: sort of dated the same guy with like really dark
Speaker 1: roots and like orange tips and who was like just
Speaker 1: always greasy and had like bars in all of his
Speaker 1: um parts of his face. Uh, and he just sort
Speaker 1: of sucked all of them or like they blowed. I
Speaker 1: don't know if they but they blow. I don't want
Speaker 1: a lot of straight dudes. Did you ever experienced this phenomenon?
Speaker 1: Like probably later on in high school, a lot of
Speaker 1: the guys were getting thigh tattoos, know what the fuck?
Speaker 1: I got a lot of bicep tats. There was a
Speaker 1: guy in all of my classes who had a sublime
Speaker 1: tat that took up his whole bicep. There was a
Speaker 1: guy bicep tattoos makes sense, But thigh tattoos, like inner thighs,
Speaker 1: like tattoos on their thighs. I've heard of guys getting
Speaker 1: tattoos like on a ring around their thighs, which must
Speaker 1: be an entrance into being gay, I think, yeah. And
Speaker 1: then I also knew a guy that got the word
Speaker 1: beer tattooed on his upper phone. That is the most
Speaker 1: trashy I think. I mean, yeah, it was six but like, yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean those that like those stories of tattoos don't
Speaker 1: surprise me about Long Island. But that story that, that
Speaker 1: long story you just told us just is riddled with
Speaker 1: like every it's discussed, it's riddled with no, it's not no,
Speaker 1: it's not even that's everything that's wrong and oppressive about
Speaker 1: it's just yeah, society, teenage angst at that specific time.
Speaker 1: It's and like that story has every example of every
Speaker 1: form of that which I think is linked back to
Speaker 1: American idol. I will also I went to summer camp
Speaker 1: also on Long Island, and we American idol is huge.
Speaker 1: When I was there and I was in love with
Speaker 1: the British councilor named Ben who was later an extra
Speaker 1: and Sweeney Todd, and I was pretty sure he was
Speaker 1: like maybe a pedophile, like we could probably work it out,
Speaker 1: like really in love, like crazy in love with him,
Speaker 1: and uh I was. I wrote a sketch called Counselor
Speaker 1: Idol that we're going to do a council fire at
Speaker 1: the end of the week and I was to play
Speaker 1: bad and uh, I stole his shirt, like me and
Speaker 1: my counts are like hatched a plan to steal his
Speaker 1: shirt because he was playing shirts of the Skins soccer.
Speaker 1: I'm just like leaving a slime trail behind me, like
Speaker 1: so excited. And I wore it and it was great
Speaker 1: and then afterwards he said keep it. I just said no, no,
Speaker 1: not at all. He's very sweet, um, not a petal,
Speaker 1: which was like a bummer at the time, but I
Speaker 1: guess now I'm like cool. Um. But my counselor who
Speaker 1: helped me steal it, was like, I don't think it's appropriate.
Speaker 1: I think you should give it back. And I found
Speaker 1: a hair in the shirt and it's still in a
Speaker 1: plastic um um container in my house. Wow, that's very
Speaker 1: good work. So American idol is a part of teenage
Speaker 1: genitals everywhere. But I do I do think it's along
Speaker 1: the same path of like you, why do you do
Speaker 1: inside these things because you're told that that's what's fine
Speaker 1: to do. So like with common culture, and like the
Speaker 1: way we all tear each other down, like and like
Speaker 1: with the way we talked about each other, like it's
Speaker 1: only because like on a on a big macro scale,
Speaker 1: we're shown that it's fine as long as the people
Speaker 1: do actually suck you should you can you're able to
Speaker 1: say they're bad, which sucks. I guess Wow, that's I mean.
Speaker 1: Remember um, like William Hung. We were just talking about
Speaker 1: William off the record before you came here. We were
Speaker 1: just talking about how it was like like I've dressed
Speaker 1: up as William Hung, like my sophomore year homecoming like celebrity.
Speaker 1: Like there's a celebrity day where people just dressed well
Speaker 1: you want homecoming king, didn't you That was the same
Speaker 1: year when homeoming you give a little no no, no no,
Speaker 1: no um, that was not the year no um. But
Speaker 1: they remember that the next year when it came to
Speaker 1: about two years later, I did. I did win homecoming.
Speaker 1: I had one homecoming lord, which is the fresh in
Speaker 1: royalty homecoming Lord. Our entire core was I was as
Speaker 1: freshmen were Lord and lady. Sophomores were duke and duchess.
Speaker 1: Then juniors were printed princess kin. They were both just
Speaker 1: I did win prom king in my high school, and
Speaker 1: I wanted it so bad. Both of you. I hate
Speaker 1: I what is this? I hated because I thought, no
Speaker 1: longer relate to either of you. Well know, can you
Speaker 1: relate to this? Because I thought I was convinced that
Speaker 1: my homecoming king win was a total joke. It was like, oh,
Speaker 1: like this is I was a joke candidate, and like
Speaker 1: people just like even still even even still in like
Speaker 1: sixty sure it was a joke. I don't think so.
Speaker 1: And I think that they voted for you. Then again,
Speaker 1: I don't know what your high school experience was like.
Speaker 1: But you don't want to guess there. I mean you
Speaker 1: were there. Everyone's both of you. I want I want
Speaker 1: to guess at you gaslight And I said, I want
Speaker 1: to guess at you. People have been using the term
Speaker 1: gaslight you an Ton, Yeah, because it's it's it's been
Speaker 1: twenty four year old man named Brian just learned what
Speaker 1: it means. It's rule rule number. We haven't we haven't
Speaker 1: named any rules yet this episode Rule number sixty seven
Speaker 1: Gas Culture. Yeah. Um, I just wanted to tag onto,
Speaker 1: uh the idea of like it being sad that we
Speaker 1: criticize people. I think a part of that is you
Speaker 1: got to look at it from the other side too,
Speaker 1: because like I think it's not just about criticizing, but
Speaker 1: like our this like new emerging need that we have
Speaker 1: in our generation, especially to be evaluated and to be
Speaker 1: constantly like sized up and told whether or not we're
Speaker 1: doing well. And like we'd rather hear that we're not
Speaker 1: doing well than like I don't know if that's true,
Speaker 1: but like I think like we need to be monitored
Speaker 1: and viewed and like seen individually. Uh So I think
Speaker 1: it's Yeah, it's like definitely the like John ronson side
Speaker 1: of it of like shaming people that yeah, yeah, I
Speaker 1: mean it ignores a lot of like issues of racism
Speaker 1: and stuff. Um, but yeah, it's still like that concept
Speaker 1: is really interesting. So it's not just that, it's like
Speaker 1: also that we need to be seen. Yeah, I think
Speaker 1: that came out came about too, and I think that's
Speaker 1: so interesting what you said, and I totally agree. And
Speaker 1: I think it also came about like as we were
Speaker 1: able to get more things, like like when you were
Speaker 1: able to just get whatever music you want, like the
Speaker 1: fact that we can just play any song we want
Speaker 1: to listen to right now, like like you can get
Speaker 1: anything like tangible. So then it becomes like, well, what
Speaker 1: are the intangible things that we can't get? I want
Speaker 1: those now I have everything else, So it becomes this
Speaker 1: thing of like what do you think about me? Like
Speaker 1: everyone's just very self centered and so this is like
Speaker 1: a very kind of heavy thing. But like I agree
Speaker 1: that it's just moving forward from like all these tangible
Speaker 1: things that were satisfied on now because we're so kind
Speaker 1: of saturated with all of it now we're like, what
Speaker 1: else can I get that I need? I need affirmation,
Speaker 1: I need love, I need respect, I need this. So
Speaker 1: I need to get it from you at whatever means
Speaker 1: necessarily doesn't mean it doesn't matter if I'm humiliated in
Speaker 1: the process. Exactly. We'll hang out with you if you
Speaker 1: suck our dicks. That's what it is. So sad. Wow,
Speaker 1: that's really tranject. I bet you guys had great dicks,
Speaker 1: though I've always had a large dick. I can't speak.
Speaker 1: I know, I know, I do. You know. Look, there's
Speaker 1: this need in society to like, um, always like talk
Speaker 1: about your dick size and have that be evaluated and
Speaker 1: judged and commented on. And I think it needs to stop.
Speaker 1: Well how far away with me? How far away from
Speaker 1: like America's biggest dick? Are we? Not very far? I
Speaker 1: think like who has it? Does Guinness track that? I mean,
Speaker 1: I feel like Guinness has to be pretty pretty because
Speaker 1: because their whole market is like allergic to outside. I
Speaker 1: used to get the Guinness Book of World Records every same.
Speaker 1: I got that for my brother this year. I hate
Speaker 1: me liked it and it was thirty It is expensive,
Speaker 1: it's big to it. I have hated the Guinness Booker
Speaker 1: World Records ever since they showed the man with the
Speaker 1: longest fingernails and oh my god, that was a classic,
Speaker 1: no fucking way this book suck. Those finger nails were insane.
Speaker 1: That was a rude thing they did to us. It
Speaker 1: was very rares. So guys just talking, we've not talked
Speaker 1: about American idol a little bit, and we're talking about
Speaker 1: a little bit. This is we've talked about America for sure,
Speaker 1: we sure have when I think, but I think we've
Speaker 1: talked about American idols much as we possibly can. We
Speaker 1: haven't even said the words like carry underwood, but like
Speaker 1: who needs it? So we get what it is. So
Speaker 1: like some people are sure have surely gone on to success.
Speaker 1: Most people haven't. Like it pretty much sucks, but it
Speaker 1: is the end of a big era. Now I ask you, guys,
Speaker 1: what era do you wish would end next? What is
Speaker 1: going on right now in the landscape, in the culture
Speaker 1: that you're like, fuck skateboards. I almost got hit by
Speaker 1: a guy just before who was on a skateboard going
Speaker 1: the wrong way down a one way street when I
Speaker 1: had the light and he almost hit she. And he
Speaker 1: was like a male blond, which I take issue with,
Speaker 1: and he like fell off his board. He looked back
Speaker 1: and then like stumbled off his board. I was like,
Speaker 1: you're not a victim here, You're not also a victim
Speaker 1: after the facts right right? And I went, how long
Speaker 1: have skateboards been? A too long? Too long? Too long?
Speaker 1: Six the sixties it was surfer culture, yeah, those little
Speaker 1: short plastic ones. That was like apparently what they were
Speaker 1: like back then. I don't try to cover board culture now.
Speaker 1: I thought he was on a hoverboard at first. I
Speaker 1: was so confused. I don't know, there's always going to
Speaker 1: be a sucking board for people to be get off aboard.
Speaker 1: My little cousin who's like gonna grow marijuana basic, he's
Speaker 1: just waiting for legalized. He's like in the school for
Speaker 1: not bought any whatever. It's called agriculture. Um. And he
Speaker 1: when he was like fifteen, I was like, do you
Speaker 1: know what you want to do? And he said, um,
Speaker 1: like for a job like after school. He said, I
Speaker 1: said what do you want to go to school for?
Speaker 1: And he said like longboarding. I was like, that is
Speaker 1: barely a form of transportation, much less a career. Could
Speaker 1: any of you ever do it? Though? Because my other
Speaker 1: cousin had a skateboard and it didn't work out for me,
Speaker 1: that that was like a big like huge, that was
Speaker 1: a huge thing that made me feel insecure about being
Speaker 1: a boy. Oh, I have to tell you one time,
Speaker 1: every year my cousin would have like these skateboard birthday parties.
Speaker 1: And my cousin had had they had a lot of
Speaker 1: money and they were able to make a half pipe.
Speaker 1: My cousin owned a half pipe. What and such A
Speaker 1: giggled into his fists. It's a giggle just started building
Speaker 1: in a half pipe. Just can't see this, But let
Speaker 1: me tell you, I never felt worse or more or
Speaker 1: less included than like at those birthday parties where it
Speaker 1: was like, oh of us, I can do this, like
Speaker 1: like fringe athletic thing like everyone else. Wait, I'm so
Speaker 1: sorry to I want to hear. But um, this guy
Speaker 1: in my first grade class, Matt Barnathon, who we all
Speaker 1: wanted to kiss. Uh um. He I was forced by
Speaker 1: his mom in first grade to invite his whole class
Speaker 1: to his laser tag birthday party. And he was so
Speaker 1: mad about it. And he told us that and he
Speaker 1: put all the kids he didn't like, which is mostly girls,
Speaker 1: on one team, and then all of his friends on
Speaker 1: the other, and they just like shot us for an hour.
Speaker 1: And you guys were like, oh, I was like Mezza,
Speaker 1: I was like, I love that the team. It was
Speaker 1: what do you think? But I don't know. You could
Speaker 1: have been like a cool timboy girl? Are you fucking
Speaker 1: kidding me? What were you like? In elementary school, quiet smart, um, weird,
Speaker 1: I like to giggle, makes sense. Hot a ship was
Speaker 1: like get out of get out, you get out. I'm
Speaker 1: not old than I'm Yeah, I don't get what you
Speaker 1: like an elementary school boing. But here's the thing before
Speaker 1: I answer that, I don't think I don't understand the
Speaker 1: concept of their being hot kids, Like we'll look like
Speaker 1: I I moved to the US as a fourth grader
Speaker 1: and then like there was just this thing that wasn't
Speaker 1: that didn't exist in Canada or maybe even in the
Speaker 1: third grade, where it was like, oh, like things are
Speaker 1: starting to stratify a bit, like these are the cool
Speaker 1: kids and these are like the lame ones. But I
Speaker 1: was like, but wait, aren't we all like all of
Speaker 1: us like are fucking idiots? Like there's no like there's
Speaker 1: like what are the markers of status? You probably knew
Speaker 1: that because you're very smart, and like, I think it's
Speaker 1: that hive mind thing that happens, which is the second
Speaker 1: year old enough to be sexually aware. You can look
Speaker 1: around and see what's desirable and what's not assirable in
Speaker 1: the moment, and you do make calls and hierarchical decisions
Speaker 1: getting made based on that ship. I just want to
Speaker 1: say that I went into the fourth grade like hot,
Speaker 1: hot as fun but I like, I went into fourth
Speaker 1: the fourth grade being like, Okay, I'm just gonna be
Speaker 1: really smart and try to be funny because you have
Speaker 1: to choose the qualities that you're going to have. It's
Speaker 1: so dumb, and so I would like fucking. There was
Speaker 1: this girl, Laura Henderson, who she sounds really complex. She
Speaker 1: was she was no, she was Australian, pasty, fucking Australian
Speaker 1: girl who was like the not hot, well she was pretty,
Speaker 1: but she was like the overachieving girl in class, and
Speaker 1: like you could tell that everyone in the class was
Speaker 1: like a little intimidated by her, and they were like,
Speaker 1: we need someone to like strike her down. And so
Speaker 1: I came in and I was the first person to
Speaker 1: beat her at spelling be Oh my god. That was
Speaker 1: such a thing too. That was such a watershed moment
Speaker 1: in the in the politics of that class where it
Speaker 1: was like, oh my god, someone's someone's defeated. Lord st
Speaker 1: No for me, no, for like that was like that
Speaker 1: was like a power thing for me. They were like wow, Bowen, Oh, oh,
Speaker 1: Bowen is good because he's and that was moved from
Speaker 1: a different school from Canada, from a different country, and
Speaker 1: so I had a similar experience when I moved schools
Speaker 1: because I think maybe some schools just do things at
Speaker 1: a different rate, like in terms of what you learn,
Speaker 1: or because I moved to a new school and then
Speaker 1: all of a sudden, I was the smartest kid in
Speaker 1: class and they were like, you're the smartest person. And
Speaker 1: it was just so weird. And it was based on
Speaker 1: the spelling, because the spelling that's like the big like
Speaker 1: that's the big like singer swim moment. Yeah. I just
Speaker 1: think it's like when a new kind of intelligence or
Speaker 1: a new kind of aesthetic comes in, like everyone's gonna
Speaker 1: be like, oh, what's this? Because I remember when I
Speaker 1: was in third grade of fourth grade, I had we
Speaker 1: had a new kid moved into the class, and he
Speaker 1: was like a totally average looking kid. But then all
Speaker 1: the girls, I think because they were like their their
Speaker 1: sexual button it just gotten pushed. They were like, oh
Speaker 1: I want to fuck justin like that's what they were
Speaker 1: all saying. Was like, and I was like, those kids dumb,
Speaker 1: those kids are here, the kids, these kids are dump
Speaker 1: started dump. But he was and I was like really
Speaker 1: upset because again I had chosen my two qualities and
Speaker 1: they were like cute and smart. That's so funny. And
Speaker 1: then the hot, the hot fourth Greers ended up growing
Speaker 1: up into being horrible. Well, no, they grew up into
Speaker 1: also being hot high schoolers. I was like, oh, then
Speaker 1: I guess you can back then I can tell, but
Speaker 1: everyone else could and I was like, wait, what do
Speaker 1: you guys thinking that I'm not Anyway, Well, it's funny
Speaker 1: because from elementary school to high school, yeah, the hot
Speaker 1: kids stayed hot, but then after high school, by god,
Speaker 1: did they take a dive. Yeah, but there's always the
Speaker 1: ones who don't, and then that's a bummer. Or they do,
Speaker 1: and then they get married and their wives take their names,
Speaker 1: which like, if I were guy, I would like come buckets.
Speaker 1: If she did that, that's like incredible. And then they
Speaker 1: like buy a house and the house looks incredible, and
Speaker 1: they have a baby girl and then they just put
Speaker 1: the giantest flower headband on her head and it's bigger
Speaker 1: than her body. And then like they have a dog
Speaker 1: named Bent lean's like a cockapoo, and you're like, fuck,
Speaker 1: they're still winning. They're still winning, Like okay, fine, you
Speaker 1: stop playing football, you started baulding, you put on weight,
Speaker 1: you still have a wife who has your literal name.
Speaker 1: That's incredible. I know. It's just different the way we
Speaker 1: look at things too, in the way like that they
Speaker 1: like people that remained with traditional lives look at things
Speaker 1: like and then sometimes I think to myself, like, maybe
Speaker 1: we're the funked up ones because we want all these
Speaker 1: complicated things and want to have all these complicated ideas
Speaker 1: about like what to do and what they're not doing.
Speaker 1: Then I'm like, no, everyone's oppressed, never mind, Yeah, but
Speaker 1: are just are those are those like are the people
Speaker 1: who are still winning? Like I don't know if they're
Speaker 1: even oppressed anymore. They I feel like they've been in
Speaker 1: Laighten because that's not a part of what they're thinking about.
Speaker 1: Like you're you're never gonna know that you're oppressed if
Speaker 1: you don't know what that means. Like that's like why
Speaker 1: women in the fifties and sixties didn't work because they
Speaker 1: didn't know they could, like and if they once they
Speaker 1: found out, it was like almost too late because it
Speaker 1: was too late to compete with everyone who had educations
Speaker 1: in those things and stuff like that. That's what the
Speaker 1: whole funked up like wound in society is is the
Speaker 1: fact that like, we lied to everyone about the American Dream.
Speaker 1: I sound like so insane, but this is true. I think, um,
Speaker 1: we lied to everyone about the American Dream and everyone
Speaker 1: bought it and it wasn't fair. Two people bought it
Speaker 1: lock Stock and Barrel. But the thing is, like, I
Speaker 1: don't know. I went to a wedding with a friend
Speaker 1: of mine as a favor because she didn't know anyone.
Speaker 1: But it was a close friend and it was on
Speaker 1: Long Island. Yea, thank you, um. And it was literally
Speaker 1: everyone that I wouldn't have um ever talked to in
Speaker 1: high school. Not my actual high school. It was all
Speaker 1: of the friends from when they worked at path Mark
Speaker 1: as teenagers. And they got ship faced and we're like
Speaker 1: grinding on me on the dance floor and I was
Speaker 1: like oh no no, no, absolutely not no, no no no,
Speaker 1: and this guy like shoved me into the dance floor.
Speaker 1: I was like, oh no, no no. And then we
Speaker 1: had to take the shuttle back with everyone and they
Speaker 1: were like, oh, table four shut the I was like,
Speaker 1: oh my god, we're on a bush and yeah, and
Speaker 1: table six. This guy said like, oh see, Apaul did
Speaker 1: he went up to the barto at the end of
Speaker 1: the night he was rereleaving, and he said, hey, how
Speaker 1: much And then they all laughed and I was like, oh,
Speaker 1: you all have wives who took your last names, and
Speaker 1: you're happier than me. Because the thing is, like in
Speaker 1: high school, I would have said, like, you know what,
Speaker 1: I'm going to be so much better than you, like
Speaker 1: you're just gonna be unhappy after graduation. But the thing is,
Speaker 1: like I had a panic attack next to a bird
Speaker 1: wing last night, and like like listening to the comedy
Speaker 1: Bang Bang like theme song, um, so it's like, you know,
Speaker 1: and he's got azalea bushes that look fucking right, so like, yeah,
Speaker 1: you know those you know, those homes are prisons. No,
Speaker 1: they're not. What if they're happier, They are happier. Have
Speaker 1: you seen American beery? Yeah, there are roses. Well, I
Speaker 1: will say I was actually pretty grateful in high school
Speaker 1: because I did have like a nice group of friends
Speaker 1: that that knew that everything was bullshit, so that was
Speaker 1: kind of nice. And I think that they've like we've
Speaker 1: all really kind of remained like sort of sort of cool.
Speaker 1: But the thing is like I wonder like if I
Speaker 1: had really fallen into a like a group of people
Speaker 1: in high school that took themselves very seriously, if like
Speaker 1: it really happens that early, like if people just like
Speaker 1: if people make decisions, big decisions as early as high school.
Speaker 1: I think they did, because I feel like I'm behind.
Speaker 1: I feel like I slowly forgot to become an adult.
Speaker 1: And like, I guess part of it is I'm like
Speaker 1: working at like a more like a company now, like
Speaker 1: a corporate that like they are functional, but you'll pick
Speaker 1: that up very quick. But it's like I just feel
Speaker 1: like I'm such an unwashed, like street brat, and I
Speaker 1: like have no idea. No, I'm not worried about you.
Speaker 1: You know, it's interesting that we're like talking about our
Speaker 1: upbringing a lot because I think it is very connected
Speaker 1: to American Idol because it was like it started when
Speaker 1: we were pretty young at a very critical point. It's
Speaker 1: like a it's like a shelter dog that lives eighteen years. Well,
Speaker 1: I have to say I would try. I would tune
Speaker 1: in occasionally to it this season, like really occasionally while
Speaker 1: I was on the road with the show, I was
Speaker 1: I was doing I watched the episode that was um
Speaker 1: they had. Kelly Clarkson returned to the show as a judge,
Speaker 1: of course, and she performed at the end of the show.
Speaker 1: She performed this like super emotional song that she wrote
Speaker 1: about being abandoned by her father and how she didn't
Speaker 1: trust men until she was much older and now she's
Speaker 1: married to a man that respects her and they have
Speaker 1: children together and she knows that. So it's actually beautifully,
Speaker 1: really powerfully performed song that happened on American Idol, And
Speaker 1: I found myself watching it like and I was like,
Speaker 1: I just rose off my chair because I was like, Wow,
Speaker 1: this show actually did create something for me, which was
Speaker 1: like I did. Look, I did really idolize her at
Speaker 1: that when she when she won that show. Remember being
Speaker 1: in sixth grade and like like maybe going into seventh
Speaker 1: grade and then feeling really stressed because I just realized
Speaker 1: I was gay like a couple of years ago. And
Speaker 1: what I liked about her, which is totally something I bought,
Speaker 1: I understand, but I still like, I think it's um
Speaker 1: valuable is that she was very herself. Is that she
Speaker 1: had like a weird sense of humor and she was
Speaker 1: like down to earth and very talented, and everyone fell
Speaker 1: in love with her. And so I said to myself
Speaker 1: in my in my mind, like wow, like if you
Speaker 1: be yourself, maybe people will like you. And then I would,
Speaker 1: And then that actually was a positive thing that I
Speaker 1: carried with me. Wait, you know when you just said that,
Speaker 1: you know what I just realized I used. The way
Speaker 1: I used American idol was after season two when Clay
Speaker 1: and Alma was runner up and he came out with
Speaker 1: his album Measure of a Man. My sister and I
Speaker 1: would listen to it in the car and I would
Speaker 1: use American idol as the way to mask my, uh
Speaker 1: like my closeted status. I was like, oh, well, this
Speaker 1: is a popular thing that I can latch onto and
Speaker 1: people don't have to get that suspicious because it's like popular.
Speaker 1: Everyone likes it, like it's it's definitely get it's so gay,
Speaker 1: but like at least you can hide behind the mask
Speaker 1: of it being this thing that everyone can be on
Speaker 1: board with. And so I was like, great, this is
Speaker 1: like something I can I can take cover behind for
Speaker 1: like at least a year. It was really like cla
Speaker 1: and know well, it was the birth of metro sexual.
Speaker 1: It was because we had to justify what the funk
Speaker 1: Ryan Seacrest was. I was like, forget that he's involved
Speaker 1: with that show. Oh he has been since. Oh no,
Speaker 1: I like forget that that's why he came out of
Speaker 1: the sea. Yeah. Right. Literally, them trying to like masculinize
Speaker 1: men that seemed like pretty gay or gay at all,
Speaker 1: was like, well, they're metro sexual. It just means that
Speaker 1: they're concerned with their appearance and habits. But they're straight.
Speaker 1: They love women, like, please don't believe that. They remember
Speaker 1: how they remember how during clayag and season they tried
Speaker 1: to like spin some bullshit narrative about him and kimberly
Speaker 1: Lock know him and Karmen was her name, and she
Speaker 1: was like this like really kind of an average like singer.
Speaker 1: But they did they try to push the romance between
Speaker 1: kimberly Lock and someone else. Yeah, they did. They constantly
Speaker 1: tried to be like, oh, there's something going on with
Speaker 1: Clay and a woman, and you were just like watching
Speaker 1: it and there's no way. What's crazy is how many
Speaker 1: American alcateestents have come out since the show. It's like
Speaker 1: don like in the first season, like there was five
Speaker 1: men in the top five, and four of them were gay.
Speaker 1: Everyone but Justin Guarini with the with the first is
Speaker 1: not gay. He's not gay. He's got just Sanjaia sa gay. Well,
Speaker 1: he wasn't the one I was thinking about, like Clay
Speaker 1: has been coming out as gay. I mean it's were
Speaker 1: killed that senator. That's true. That is a funny story.
Speaker 1: I love the claic. We live in a world now,
Speaker 1: like it's been long enough. The claic and came to
Speaker 1: us that he like was denying murder allogations during a
Speaker 1: political campaign, right right right, like there's nothing rash turned out. Okay,
Speaker 1: it'll be Clayake and writing for senator denying murder allegations,
Speaker 1: and you live in a shock. I love it. Oh man,
Speaker 1: that is so funny. But he definitely didn't get a
Speaker 1: seat in Congress right now, that didn't. I think it
Speaker 1: was they were in the same party, but I don't
Speaker 1: know that because one of them is an incumbent. I
Speaker 1: think I don't know. I might have been happy. I remember,
Speaker 1: I think it was post the election. The person that
Speaker 1: won it was. It was the like it was like
Speaker 1: the seat elect I don't remember. I thought it was before.
Speaker 1: I thought it was before the election. That's why that
Speaker 1: could couldn't be true. I know that he did not
Speaker 1: rightfully win a seat, but also, um, weird that even
Speaker 1: and I think it was like two thousand eight, like
Speaker 1: when Adam Lambert was on the show, they weren't saying
Speaker 1: he couldn't have been more gay? What a weird? It
Speaker 1: was so recent that the whole country was like what gay?
Speaker 1: Like our are you fucking kidding me? And now like
Speaker 1: Neil Patrick Harrison is gorgeous. Family are like posing as
Speaker 1: the Joker and Robin and Batman like in People magazine
Speaker 1: and no one that's a fucking eye. Last yea, that
Speaker 1: is funny because so rapidly and that actually gets me
Speaker 1: like hot and bothered. I said this on Facebook once,
Speaker 1: but like when when people post that that clip of
Speaker 1: Hillary Clinton saying I don't believe in gay marriage, Yeah,
Speaker 1: fucking everyone else was saying that too until three minutes ago,
Speaker 1: so shut up. Yeah yeah, yeah, that's what. I just
Speaker 1: don't like it, like we like we pretend like we've
Speaker 1: always been cool with gay people, and like that stuff
Speaker 1: that we said didn't matter. I remember like sitting on
Speaker 1: the couch with my mom in high school, like my
Speaker 1: mom and my sister would be in the room and
Speaker 1: we turn on Gray's Anatomy, and like Kellie and Arizona
Speaker 1: would kiss and they would freak out like we were
Speaker 1: watching the Twin Towers come down. I was like, and
Speaker 1: they would not We needed to turn the channel. I
Speaker 1: was like, this is crazy, and I was like, don't
Speaker 1: melt steal games. They can't if they don't burn hot enough.
Speaker 1: But almost you guys have a conspiracy theory. We're gradsing
Speaker 1: out of me lesbian truth Melton my steel beam if
Speaker 1: you know it. Oh, I just couldn't. I wish it
Speaker 1: were an inside job. Sorry, nice, I couldn't believe. Like
Speaker 1: it's been about a month and a half. Okay, that's
Speaker 1: that's good. Storre than Wait, what do you mean since sex? Yeah,
Speaker 1: I made out with that's when did you make out?
Speaker 1: You can do? I know him? You told me already. Yeah,
Speaker 1: sat on Sunday, Okay, because I love when people make
Speaker 1: up people that I know. I love making up people.
Speaker 1: Forget about making this love making. You can just make
Speaker 1: out with someone. It's great. Ess. Actually one of my
Speaker 1: one of my favorite things to do. This is a
Speaker 1: funny story. Well we'll talk about this later. It's a
Speaker 1: really funny story. Well, oh yeah, it's like I'm like
Speaker 1: the most mentally fragile I've ever been, and like with
Speaker 1: the thought of like having a podcast come back to
Speaker 1: bite me in the ass is just not something I
Speaker 1: need to be married that happens to me. Um. So, guys,
Speaker 1: speaking of being married, let's talk about someone who's been
Speaker 1: married several times and it's involved with American idol um
Speaker 1: Jennifer Lopez. Jennifer Lopez. So wait, by the way, what
Speaker 1: did we decide on that we want? Oh, skateboarding, we
Speaker 1: want that area. And for me, I want wedding like
Speaker 1: the current wedding culture now, oh yes, I don't have
Speaker 1: to talk about that. It's weird. Just have a party. No,
Speaker 1: I agree with you that the whole the whole era
Speaker 1: of like we're having a wedding, it needs to end.
Speaker 1: I literally just want the city the city Hall thing
Speaker 1: for new It's after all this fucking nonsense oft of
Speaker 1: modernity in wedding culture, Like, it's just no, it makes
Speaker 1: no sense. Yeah, I agree with both of you. Guys.
Speaker 1: What air, what air needs to go for you know
Speaker 1: what air needs to go for me? I'm going to say,
Speaker 1: you know, what. I'm gonna keep thinking about it, um,
Speaker 1: because I just don't know, right um. But I do
Speaker 1: know about this next topic. This next topic is we
Speaker 1: talked about American idol. Let's talk about the queen of
Speaker 1: it right now, Jennifer Lopez. Jennifer, what's your favorite Jennifer
Speaker 1: Lopez Era? All right, I'll start And this is a
Speaker 1: very unconventionally answer. Okay, go ahead. Her last album promotion cycle,
Speaker 1: when she was promoting what was it called The on
Speaker 1: the Floor? Is it called love question mark? No? No, no,
Speaker 1: it's the K That's what it was. Only we know
Speaker 1: the titles of her albums US and Her, US and Her,
Speaker 1: And she came up with a song called I Love You,
Speaker 1: I Love your Poppy, I love You. But the song
Speaker 1: is really good and the video is really cute and funny.
Speaker 1: I like the video to videos, like really. It's like
Speaker 1: she's with her friends and they're talking to this like
Speaker 1: music video producer. They're writing a dreaming for the music video,
Speaker 1: and they're like, what if j Lo like like falls
Speaker 1: and hits her head and like has a dream about
Speaker 1: a boy like and her and all our friends are like,
Speaker 1: excuse me, we can't do that they're like, I don't
Speaker 1: think so she needs to be fierce. It's really good.
Speaker 1: It's really good. And then the video so you like
Speaker 1: like j Lo dripping swag ou well, she because she
Speaker 1: didn't give a fuck. She was like, you know what, like,
Speaker 1: I'm never gonna be like seen as like a Beyonce anymore.
Speaker 1: Like I think for a while she was trying to
Speaker 1: be like before Beyonce became Beyonce, she was trying to
Speaker 1: be that figure, like that untouchable like I mean, she's
Speaker 1: physically flawless, but like that physical like pillar of perfection. Like,
Speaker 1: but then like I think that the last album cycle,
Speaker 1: she was just like, you know what, I'm just gonna
Speaker 1: have fun. I will say that my favorite j Lo
Speaker 1: is romantic comedy j Love. Just watch Made in Manhattan.
Speaker 1: What holds Up? No, it does not. It's the most
Speaker 1: bat shit crazy thing I've ever seen. It. Definitely crazy.
Speaker 1: But isn't she charming. She takes a woman's clothes and
Speaker 1: wears them, and her son's like, go go go get
Speaker 1: fucked moms, and he's like, mom, you have to go
Speaker 1: get fused. And then all of her friends are just
Speaker 1: there and they're like, you gotta get fused and then
Speaker 1: he comes in and they're all like he's white, and
Speaker 1: then everyone's like your hispanic and then they like go
Speaker 1: for a walk and she's just wearing someone else's clothes
Speaker 1: and it's like his wife or something he's wearing. It's insane.
Speaker 1: It is the most it feels like it, you know,
Speaker 1: like art created by serial killers. Like it felt like, oh,
Speaker 1: this is creative by a death throw in me. That
Speaker 1: is like fried meat loaf. That is not my favorite one.
Speaker 1: Can I tell you what my favorite one is? My
Speaker 1: favorite Dre Little roum Come is Wedding Planner because it
Speaker 1: has this moment at the end. Okay, wedding Planter is
Speaker 1: with it's with her and Matthew McConaughey and Matthew McConaughey
Speaker 1: is getting married and she's the wedding planner and during
Speaker 1: the preparations for the wedding they fall in love. So
Speaker 1: basically like there's nightmare, what a night There's nothing worse
Speaker 1: than this. Did she give them their deposit back? I mean,
Speaker 1: so well, let me get there. So basically, like I
Speaker 1: guess to the point later on where oh this is
Speaker 1: so funny, this is a great look. Communicant gym. So
Speaker 1: they're in the car riding back from seeing the venue
Speaker 1: and and the white the wife was like so thin
Speaker 1: and so blonde, like so severe, and I think she
Speaker 1: definitely is like Pete Sampras's wife and that actress. She's
Speaker 1: like that. She's like a sweetheart. Um, we don't have
Speaker 1: a song, and we need to pick a song right now,
Speaker 1: So I'm gonna flick through the wedding song CD and
Speaker 1: you tell You're like and earlier in the movie, um
Speaker 1: J Loo is having a talk with her like friends
Speaker 1: about how she can tell how long a marriage is
Speaker 1: gonna last, and she goes, I always know a marriage
Speaker 1: is doom. When they picked the wedding song and they
Speaker 1: choose I Honestly Love You by Olivia Newton John and
Speaker 1: they're flicking, flicking through and and the woman goes like, no,
Speaker 1: not this song, not this song, not the song, And
Speaker 1: then I Honestly Love You by Olivia Newton John comes
Speaker 1: on and she goes, Olivia Newton John, I love this song.
Speaker 1: And Matthew McConnelly is like, I like it too, and
Speaker 1: Jennifer Lopez is like, I think it's perfect. And that's
Speaker 1: how you know that she's gonna win. But then there's
Speaker 1: a crushing moment where it looks like it's not going
Speaker 1: to work out, and j Lo is like packing up
Speaker 1: her ship to leave the venue and this song is playing,
Speaker 1: and this is the words of the song, how can
Speaker 1: I plan on forever when I plan on you? So
Speaker 1: it's like works because she's a wedding plan, plan, plan plan,
Speaker 1: I plan to plan in wedding. Well, it's the worst
Speaker 1: and it's the best. And then do you ever see
Speaker 1: a monster in law? No? Well, in the end after yeah,
Speaker 1: Jane Fonda in her And at the end when j
Speaker 1: Loo gives a speech that says like she gives her
Speaker 1: final speech to Jane Fonda and want to sex. One
Speaker 1: of the Sikes goes man, that girl can give a
Speaker 1: good little speech, Oh my god, poor one wander s
Speaker 1: give a little speech, oh my god. And then Wanda
Speaker 1: will come in and compliment the person, and then that's
Speaker 1: a wrap on Wanda. Honestly, it was like that. She
Speaker 1: plays like Jane Pond is best friend, which like sure,
Speaker 1: no never, but also she is like her employee. People
Speaker 1: who wear leotards are always racist, j Lo era your
Speaker 1: favorite Anna dressin it's a good question. I love Selena.
Speaker 1: I mean, I love truly good word. I love her
Speaker 1: natural nose. I thought it was really cute. I like
Speaker 1: knowing that she's like a girl from the block, you know,
Speaker 1: Like I like knowing that she's like the pretty girl
Speaker 1: in high school who's like famous, and now she just
Speaker 1: looks like she you know, came out of the c
Speaker 1: phone again. Um, but I like I like that. Um My, grandma,
Speaker 1: we watched the was it the v m as when
Speaker 1: she wore the dress or the MTV? I think it
Speaker 1: was the Grammys, the Grammys for first acci Dress. Yeah.
Speaker 1: Um My grandma lost her mind because Ellen Dejenneres was
Speaker 1: doing the Red carpet interviews and she was gay and
Speaker 1: she kept yelling you're gay, you're gay, and you're gay
Speaker 1: and disgusting and you're gay. And then Jennifer Lopez came
Speaker 1: out and she kept saying, pig, you're a pig. And
Speaker 1: then Ellen interviewed j Lo and she was like, pig gay, gay,
Speaker 1: pig gay. Um. I say that's my favorite because I
Speaker 1: love David Dukovany and I love when he's like, I'm
Speaker 1: horny cool. Did I would tell you, Oh my god,
Speaker 1: this is so funny. I was at dojo, which is
Speaker 1: like now right now, are from where we are right now. Um,
Speaker 1: when it was old dojo and we were there and
Speaker 1: I was like waiting around with my friend Lauren from
Speaker 1: my school, and we were watching like David Dukovany sat
Speaker 1: there with his kids, and he was so upset. And
Speaker 1: then tayley On he walks in and they said no
Speaker 1: words to each other, and like he left and they
Speaker 1: did like a child handoff, and I said later to
Speaker 1: my expense, um, and yeah, David Dukovany looked miserable the
Speaker 1: whole time. Mike goes, well, that's because he probably wanted
Speaker 1: to fund his food all night. Is such an insane
Speaker 1: sex attict, right, he's such a I do think he's hot.
Speaker 1: I would make sure you watch Californication. There's some good
Speaker 1: like uh uh, you know, celebrity skin type websites that
Speaker 1: will give you just what you need to see. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I'll get you know what. I'm gonna buy some rubber sheets,
Speaker 1: a couple of tarps, playing on the tarps, so I'm
Speaker 1: just gonna let it get She gushes. Goosh um cool, Jennifer.
Speaker 1: I feel like she's so incredibly beautiful right now, like
Speaker 1: her hair and her makeup her and boy next door
Speaker 1: was like, oh you in theaters? Yeah? Um, but yeah.
Speaker 1: She just looks incredible in every scene, which is distracting
Speaker 1: because she's supposed to be like I'm going through a divorce.
Speaker 1: She's like, Oh, I'm like a homely wife. I'm just
Speaker 1: like a teacher wife. I'm just like a teacher wife.
Speaker 1: I just I'm I'm sorry, I can't talk right now,
Speaker 1: Like I'm a teacher wife. I'm busy, I'm a teach
Speaker 1: your wife, I have to do these papers and this
Speaker 1: wife and he got me a copy of The Odyssey
Speaker 1: first editions and also and also her acting in that
Speaker 1: scene was just so Her in acting in general is
Speaker 1: curious because she like just sort of doesn't open and
Speaker 1: her job at all just like whoa Like, I don't
Speaker 1: like there's her acting technique is small mouth? Do you know?
Speaker 1: What I can't believe is like this whole time we're
Speaker 1: talking about her, and she's literally on that NBC show
Speaker 1: Shades of Blue or whatever it's called, and like it's
Speaker 1: a thing, and my thing is like, how did she
Speaker 1: work it out that she could do a Fox show
Speaker 1: at an NBC show at the same time, Because she's Jifer.
Speaker 1: I think yeah rights incredible lawyers. She also I saw
Speaker 1: her say on each Your Hollywood story that she loves
Speaker 1: love um, which confused me even though I was I
Speaker 1: just love to buy that this snake is starting to
Speaker 1: eat its own talent. She loves love guys. With that
Speaker 1: being said, I want to at this time, I want
Speaker 1: to present our Lifetime Achievement Awards to Jennifer Lopez. Bowen,
Speaker 1: you have the floor. Please present your Lifetime Achievement Awards
Speaker 1: to Jolo, who's truly deserved that at this point. Visionary artist, innovator, body,
Speaker 1: image disruptor. These are just some some of the words
Speaker 1: that I have used to describe the recipient of the
Speaker 1: Lost Culture Asta's Lifetime Achievement Award to myself in the
Speaker 1: silence of my own room. Jennifer Lopez is such an
Speaker 1: inspiration to me and two millions across the world, and
Speaker 1: I hope she comes to my next birthday party at
Speaker 1: an outdoor bar. Thank you, Anna present your Lifetime Achievement Awards,
Speaker 1: Jennifer Lopez. When a human being is born, they exit
Speaker 1: a female body. Sometimes they themselves are female bodies, sometimes
Speaker 1: they're not. The answer, of course, is left up to
Speaker 1: the toy costs of chance Jennifer Lopez as a woman,
Speaker 1: but more than that, she came from a woman, as
Speaker 1: did we all. I was just that's it. That's it, Matt,
Speaker 1: your turn, Jennifer, girl. What a road, what a path,
Speaker 1: what a day? I stand before you humbly, as your friend,
Speaker 1: as your collaborator, as your ex husband. My name is
Speaker 1: Chris Judd. I want to thank you for putting me
Speaker 1: on the map, for putting so many of us on
Speaker 1: the map. You putting Mark Anthony on the map. No
Speaker 1: miamis to my son. No miamis cuss And yeah, that's
Speaker 1: what I have to say. I feel like she'd be
Speaker 1: so judgments all she heard this at all, I think
Speaker 1: she would crack her ass up. I don't. I don't
Speaker 1: think she would. I think she think it's funny. You do, Yeah,
Speaker 1: I do. I think I think that she had a
Speaker 1: good sense of humor. Her makeup would not have been
Speaker 1: as good in The Boy next stor because it looks
Speaker 1: incredible in every scene. You don't think she has a
Speaker 1: good sense of humor For doing the War next Door?
Speaker 1: Absolutely not, No, because that could have been an amazing
Speaker 1: piece of camp and instead they made they tried to
Speaker 1: make it like fucking what lies beneath that's not her?
Speaker 1: That might not have been her problem. She was an
Speaker 1: ep on it. It's her vehicle. There's no way someone
Speaker 1: wrote that movie not for Jennifer Lopez. No one was like,
Speaker 1: I want to write this movie. I don't care who's
Speaker 1: in it. So now comes, Um, we have a couple
Speaker 1: things that we have to do before we wrap, and
Speaker 1: this first segment is called I don't Think so honey,
Speaker 1: which is you have sixty seconds on the clock to
Speaker 1: rail against something using the words I don't think so honey,
Speaker 1: and you can get as upset as you want. You
Speaker 1: have sixty seconds, and it's anything in culture, anything in
Speaker 1: your life, as long as you present a case and
Speaker 1: you complete the case. Man, I think I think either
Speaker 1: one of us should start first, and I can see
Speaker 1: I think that should go first. All right, I don't.
Speaker 1: I don't haven't thought of one, okay, but let's let's
Speaker 1: do one. Well. That's part of part of what makes
Speaker 1: this amazing is it's off the cuff great because we
Speaker 1: find out what's truly bothering you love it. I don't
Speaker 1: Think so honey. With Boonen Yang starting right now, you
Speaker 1: know what, I don't think so, honey, strep throat I've
Speaker 1: been having. I've been in I've been mid bat with
Speaker 1: strep throughat for the last four days. And it is
Speaker 1: a mobilized me. It is paralyzed my mind. I haven't
Speaker 1: been able to function at all in the workplace with
Speaker 1: my collaborators, with um, with my projects. And it's really
Speaker 1: just ground everything to a screeching hall. I don't think so, honey,
Speaker 1: strap through. You know what this is. This is not
Speaker 1: a modern day sickness anymore. It is an old perennial
Speaker 1: bacterial infection that you know at this talk about what
Speaker 1: it is should be cured, honey, and and listen, and
Speaker 1: you know what I've I've I've dealt with this strap
Speaker 1: through it. But now I'm out of that whole fever
Speaker 1: body eg zone and I'm into this canker store at
Speaker 1: the back of my throat jone. And it is it
Speaker 1: is really still just lingering with me, and honey, it is.
Speaker 1: It is truly a crippling, crippling condition that I I
Speaker 1: think we just get angry ten seconds. I don't even
Speaker 1: think that we it has a place in society anymore
Speaker 1: or in culture honey. So at this point, I want
Speaker 1: to I want to get back on my feet. No
Speaker 1: throw culture is honey, yes, and I need a throw
Speaker 1: culture now. So I'm wanna get back on my might
Speaker 1: be without straps is. I don't think so. I don't
Speaker 1: think so, honey. Oh my word, that was hard, because
Speaker 1: you know what's still hard for me to talk. Yeah.
Speaker 1: Sometimes the things that we don't think so, honey are
Speaker 1: the things that are keeping us back from talking. That's true.
Speaker 1: And I've known this for a while. Okay, mat you're
Speaker 1: not right. I don't think so, honey, And then time starts.
Speaker 1: Now I don't think so honey. People they don't want
Speaker 1: to get tickled. If I feel like I want to
Speaker 1: tickle you, it's because I like you and because I
Speaker 1: love you even and if I want to come over
Speaker 1: to you and have you get a little bit of
Speaker 1: affection because I want to tickle you, it doesn't mean
Speaker 1: you have to get so touchy about it, no pun intended.
Speaker 1: I don't think so, honey. Especially my boyfriend. If I
Speaker 1: want to tickle him all over and he doesn't like
Speaker 1: being typical, he sends to it. That's fine, I want
Speaker 1: to do it. And you know what, all my friends,
Speaker 1: if I want to tickle them, I don't think they
Speaker 1: should have a problem with it. I think that that's
Speaker 1: my way of showing affection, and you stifle me. I
Speaker 1: don't think so, honey. So when I come up to
Speaker 1: you with my fingers, first of all, don't still I'm
Speaker 1: gonna tickle you. Maybe I don't even like you that much.
Speaker 1: But if I do start tickle you, you take it
Speaker 1: for the ten fifteen seconds it's gonna be until I'm done,
Speaker 1: and you let me tickle you the way you you
Speaker 1: need it, because sometimes you needed to laugh and you
Speaker 1: needed some joy. And I see that, and I read
Speaker 1: that when I go in the room. So, bitch, if
Speaker 1: I'm gonna tickle you, I don't think so, honey. You
Speaker 1: say now, I think you said, yes, tank, let me
Speaker 1: take let me said to me. That's a minute. Wow.
Speaker 1: This might be the first time I disagree with you.
Speaker 1: I don't think so, honey. Yeah, I don't think so.
Speaker 1: How do you I think that no one. I think
Speaker 1: that that's an invasionive person, literally, an indefensible position to take.
Speaker 1: I think that you guys are there's nothing more heinous
Speaker 1: than what you just said. It's just tickling. All right, okay, well,
Speaker 1: and I want you want to you want to go
Speaker 1: into one? Start the clock? Okay, and you start? We do.
Speaker 1: I'm sorry, Do I have permission to speak in sort
Speaker 1: of a gay accent? I didn't. I wanted to say
Speaker 1: something that wasn't gay, but I couldn't know. Okay, say it, Okay, ready,
Speaker 1: time starts now. I don't think so honey being upright
Speaker 1: fuck that. No, no, no, I have a bed. You
Speaker 1: can I work in my bed, I sleep in my bed,
Speaker 1: I think in my bed. I look at my phone
Speaker 1: in my bed. And you know what, even when I'm
Speaker 1: not in my bed, I can be on my couch. Okay,
Speaker 1: I can be on my couch and I can lie down.
Speaker 1: When I'm upright. That means that my head has to
Speaker 1: balance on the rest of my fucking body. Are you
Speaker 1: kidding me? What am I jenga? No? No, no, no,
Speaker 1: I am not a tower. Humans were once crawling when
Speaker 1: we were babies and when we're monkeys, and when we
Speaker 1: were sea slugs because we were sea slugs. And I'm
Speaker 1: not having this argument right now inside of I don't
Speaker 1: think so honey, interior. I don't think so honey. People
Speaker 1: who said, we're not sea slugs because we are back
Speaker 1: to the regular. I don't think so, honey, being upright.
Speaker 1: I don't want to stand. I don't want to sit.
Speaker 1: I don't want to kneel. I don't want to lean.
Speaker 1: I don't wanna tippy toe. I don't want to jump.
Speaker 1: I want to lie down. I want to lean. I
Speaker 1: want to be on the ground. And when I visit
Speaker 1: my parents, they have carpet because they're old, and I
Speaker 1: can lie on the carpet and it's like a big
Speaker 1: bed for my whole house. And fuck being upright, I
Speaker 1: don't think so honey. I don't think so honey. I
Speaker 1: don't want to agree. I want to be lying. I
Speaker 1: like being on my belly, on my background. You know,
Speaker 1: I'm a belly girl. Everyone looks at me, said, she's
Speaker 1: a belly girl. Belly girl. Can I tell you, I
Speaker 1: think I'm gonna throw my back at last night like
Speaker 1: partaking in some like semi sexual activities. Yet to do
Speaker 1: that stuff upright? Okay, man, let's move on to some
Speaker 1: some other stuff. All right. So now we've got all
Speaker 1: of our negative negativity out of the way. Um, it's
Speaker 1: time to award the culture of the week. We gotta
Speaker 1: do this really quickly. Were necessarily We're going to get there,
Speaker 1: all right. So my culture of the week, um, and
Speaker 1: this is to the best culture of this week, to
Speaker 1: the institution that I think to culture the best. Um,
Speaker 1: it's gonna go do Walt Disney World yet again. Um,
Speaker 1: Walt Disney World. I think that they had an American
Speaker 1: Idol attraction. I think that they're doing everything right. We
Speaker 1: discussed how how happy it makes everyone to judge people. Well,
Speaker 1: guess what at American Idol the experience in Disney Hollywood Studios.
Speaker 1: It's since closed, but for many years they were able
Speaker 1: to provide people with the opportunity to judge people live
Speaker 1: while on a family vacation. So I think that's amazing.
Speaker 1: And you know, I recently met someone who played the
Speaker 1: Simon in the show, and um, she seemed lovely and
Speaker 1: I think that she had a really good time tearing
Speaker 1: people down while they were paying, um good money to
Speaker 1: be on a family vacation. And I want to thank
Speaker 1: Disney for creating that experience and for creating that culture.
Speaker 1: Now even you and your family can go rip each
Speaker 1: other apart absolutely and the family units of others. So
Speaker 1: thank you. Disney World for this, Thank you Disney. What
Speaker 1: do you think? Okay? Um, well, it's it's if I
Speaker 1: am because I was going to go into my Culture
Speaker 1: the Week, but my Culture the Week was also going
Speaker 1: to be weal Disney World for the second week in
Speaker 1: a row, um and again for their commendable uh take
Speaker 1: on the American Idol experience. How do you gamify? How
Speaker 1: do you create a theme park experience for such a
Speaker 1: specific show, with such a specific, tight format, and that
Speaker 1: is to open up the judgment process to uh, the
Speaker 1: entire public and the entire theme park, um, all of
Speaker 1: those patrons and so um. I don't personally know anyone
Speaker 1: who's ever worked on that ride, so I can't speak
Speaker 1: to that on a on a personal level, but I
Speaker 1: am sure that everyone who's been a part of that
Speaker 1: experience has enjoyed it, enjoyed creating that singular experience for
Speaker 1: Walt Disney World part goers from all over the world.
Speaker 1: So Anna, what's your culture of the week? My culture
Speaker 1: of the week is um hair things that are flat,
Speaker 1: uh flat ones? Because I didn't know and I went
Speaker 1: to a wet that wedding and they had a really
Speaker 1: well stocked basket in the ladies room, like they had
Speaker 1: a fucking pregnancy test in there. It was like very
Speaker 1: tricked out. It was tricked out, it had everything in it.
Speaker 1: And they had here things. I mean, my friend were
Speaker 1: just like going through and taking things. Um and I
Speaker 1: took one of their flat here things and it's changing
Speaker 1: my life. That's great because normally it's round your pony.
Speaker 1: When it's flat, it's flat. It flat, it flat flat
Speaker 1: when your pony, it's flat. So I love that. I agree. Um.
Speaker 1: So now fulture of the week, it's our failed culture
Speaker 1: of the week. We talked about the worst culture of Okay, okay,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna say, um, roll on deodorant because it gets
Speaker 1: very clumpy when you put it in your armpits. Actually
Speaker 1: when you have hair, um, when you roll on the deodorant,
Speaker 1: especially if you're really trying to get it. Good. Um,
Speaker 1: good luck returning to your arm pit, you know, six
Speaker 1: seven hours later and not seeing what are clumps of deodorant. Yeah,
Speaker 1: very hard. When you make love. Um, when you make love. Well,
Speaker 1: my faulture of the week, um and this is this
Speaker 1: is nowhere near it is this is nowhere near as
Speaker 1: cultured or is um affecting as Matt's I'm sorry Deoran deodorant. Yeah,
Speaker 1: but my fault of the week failed culture is um
Speaker 1: the h holistic works of Haruki Murakami. Um. You know what,
Speaker 1: everyone loves the wind Up Bird Chronicle. It's a fantastic book.
Speaker 1: What what a beautiful piece of modern magic realist storytelling.
Speaker 1: But as a whole, he does not write women well.
Speaker 1: They are always objects of desire and sexual sexual intercourse.
Speaker 1: They are not characters with depth, They are never characters
Speaker 1: with complex emotions. Um. But all of his male protagonists
Speaker 1: are these repressed, reticent um Japanese men who need sex
Speaker 1: to complete them. And you know what, it's a tire narrative,
Speaker 1: hurukee I, I think you should change that, so Boots,
Speaker 1: So my little wag of the finger to Huruke Mirakami. Um,
Speaker 1: I guess I'm sort of behind enemy lines here because
Speaker 1: my filter is uh, well, Disney World. Um, it is
Speaker 1: an expensive sunburn. It's a fight with your family that
Speaker 1: you'll remember forever. Productive and every girl is shoplifted in
Speaker 1: high school gets married there, So um, it's worthless. It's
Speaker 1: um culturally bankrupt, I don't it's forced joy, it's the
Speaker 1: commodification of uh enjoyment, even though there's nothing there that's
Speaker 1: inherently enjoyable at all besides alcohol. Um, all joy these
Speaker 1: days is commodified. Well you know what, actually I think
Speaker 1: we're about at a time. So um with that, with that,
Speaker 1: don't push answer, get her out, get her out there,
Speaker 1: thank you. We do very no hard feelings against Anna.
Speaker 1: We're talking about well Disney World, but we do want
Speaker 1: to say we didn't say why we looked like little poops. Um,
Speaker 1: it's because we're in these wide brim hats. This is
Speaker 1: large cultu races. We're coming at you with culture, with
Speaker 1: with capped culture. We have little hats, were all wearing hats.
Speaker 1: We're gonna take a beautiful instagram for you. And what's
Speaker 1: the piece of the merchant that they can get from
Speaker 1: this episode? Well, man, I think the piece of merchant
Speaker 1: in this episode is, um, what was that? What was
Speaker 1: our little thing that we talked about as the culture tip?
Speaker 1: What wash? Don't get a gaslight culture? Gaslight culture. We're
Speaker 1: gonna we're gonna make a little napkin, a stack of napkins,
Speaker 1: paper napkins. That that's a gaslight culture. Uh yeah, don't
Speaker 1: gaslight me, don't gaslight me. Bro, it's gonna be a
Speaker 1: little stack of napkins. And you, yes, you, the last
Speaker 1: culturetener can own the stack of napkins. There's only going
Speaker 1: to be one, all right. Thank you guys so much,
Speaker 1: thank you. And a Dressen please look up, and a
Speaker 1: Dressen online at an address and she is like a
Speaker 1: Twitter goddess um and probably a productress, member of Gentlemen Party,
Speaker 1: host the Open. Michelle used to be used to that
Speaker 1: movie every second Friday at the month of Videology. And
Speaker 1: you're gonna need to buy her book on Amazon. Re
Speaker 1: order on Amazon. Guys, Bye bye, my grandma and your
Speaker 1: grandma was sitting back. This has been a Forever Dog
Speaker 1: production executive produced by Joe Cilio, Alex Ramsay, and Brett Bom.
Speaker 1: For more podcasts, please visit Forever Dog Productions dot com.