1 00:00:00,880 --> 00:00:03,800 Speaker 1: All right time now for today's Strawberry Letter. And if 2 00:00:03,800 --> 00:00:07,480 Speaker 1: you need advice on relationships, dating, work, sex, parenting, and more. 3 00:00:08,039 --> 00:00:11,600 Speaker 1: Please submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve HARVEYFM dot com 4 00:00:11,600 --> 00:00:14,560 Speaker 1: and click submit Strawberry Letter. We could be reading your 5 00:00:14,640 --> 00:00:17,520 Speaker 1: letter live on the air, just like we're gonna read 6 00:00:17,600 --> 00:00:21,200 Speaker 1: this one right here, right now for you, Jay. That 7 00:00:21,360 --> 00:00:24,160 Speaker 1: is for you. Buckle up, hold on tight, We got 8 00:00:24,160 --> 00:00:28,120 Speaker 1: it for you. Here it is. Thank you, nephew. Subjects 9 00:00:28,120 --> 00:00:33,160 Speaker 1: sanctified and saved Swingers. Oh you're not gonna believe this one, guys, 10 00:00:33,200 --> 00:00:36,360 Speaker 1: but here we go. Dear Stephen Shirley, I'm a black 11 00:00:36,360 --> 00:00:39,440 Speaker 1: man in my mid thirties and I'm married to the 12 00:00:39,520 --> 00:00:43,120 Speaker 1: woman of my dreams. We moved back to my home 13 00:00:43,200 --> 00:00:45,800 Speaker 1: state a few years back and we joined a great 14 00:00:45,920 --> 00:00:48,800 Speaker 1: new church. We are friends with several of the young 15 00:00:48,880 --> 00:00:52,320 Speaker 1: married couples there, but we're having a problem with one 16 00:00:52,360 --> 00:00:55,440 Speaker 1: couple in particular. We used to hang out with them 17 00:00:55,480 --> 00:00:58,800 Speaker 1: and we got really close and we will double date 18 00:00:58,880 --> 00:01:01,400 Speaker 1: with this couple and have game night at their house 19 00:01:01,600 --> 00:01:04,440 Speaker 1: or hours. Not too long ago, we decided to have 20 00:01:04,520 --> 00:01:10,280 Speaker 1: our first swinger's experience with them. My wife has always 21 00:01:10,280 --> 00:01:13,440 Speaker 1: wanted to try it, but I was always a little skeptical. 22 00:01:13,920 --> 00:01:16,280 Speaker 1: We were at the couple's house and they decided it 23 00:01:16,319 --> 00:01:18,800 Speaker 1: was time to try it, but my wife and I 24 00:01:18,880 --> 00:01:22,200 Speaker 1: were caught off guard. My wife was all into it 25 00:01:22,240 --> 00:01:24,440 Speaker 1: and had a great time with a guy, but I 26 00:01:24,440 --> 00:01:28,120 Speaker 1: didn't hold up my end of the deal. I couldn't. 27 00:01:28,600 --> 00:01:31,959 Speaker 1: I could not do it or her. I could not 28 00:01:32,080 --> 00:01:35,640 Speaker 1: do it or her. The other female got really upset, 29 00:01:35,920 --> 00:01:39,680 Speaker 1: so when things simmered down, we left a few days later, 30 00:01:39,760 --> 00:01:42,920 Speaker 1: I reached out to the guy to plan another game night. 31 00:01:43,280 --> 00:01:45,600 Speaker 1: He told me that he and his wife are still 32 00:01:45,640 --> 00:01:49,560 Speaker 1: angry because I didn't satisfy his wife. We said that 33 00:01:49,640 --> 00:01:52,680 Speaker 1: our friendship. He said that our friendship is one sided. 34 00:01:53,120 --> 00:01:56,960 Speaker 1: I thought that we all had bonded and it would 35 00:01:56,960 --> 00:01:59,880 Speaker 1: be something great and private between us. We saw them 36 00:02:00,160 --> 00:02:03,280 Speaker 1: church Sunday and they barely spoke to us. My wife 37 00:02:03,280 --> 00:02:05,600 Speaker 1: thinks that the other couples that we hang up with 38 00:02:06,040 --> 00:02:09,680 Speaker 1: are all into swinging, are all into swinging, because the 39 00:02:09,720 --> 00:02:13,520 Speaker 1: women acted funny with her. I would not put it 40 00:02:13,560 --> 00:02:17,120 Speaker 1: past them, But how can all these church people be 41 00:02:17,320 --> 00:02:21,360 Speaker 1: doing this? Is swinging that mainstream? Now I should have 42 00:02:21,400 --> 00:02:24,519 Speaker 1: followed my first mind and not even tried it. How 43 00:02:24,560 --> 00:02:26,960 Speaker 1: can we fix this and save face at our church 44 00:02:27,000 --> 00:02:31,120 Speaker 1: with these saved swingers? Or should we leave this church 45 00:02:31,240 --> 00:02:34,240 Speaker 1: all together? Any advice you can offer would be great. 46 00:02:35,040 --> 00:02:43,600 Speaker 1: What any advice we could offer? Save swingers? How was 47 00:02:43,639 --> 00:02:48,200 Speaker 1: that even in the same sentence save swingers? How is 48 00:02:48,200 --> 00:02:51,440 Speaker 1: that putting that doesn't go together? Come on, now, you 49 00:02:51,520 --> 00:02:54,640 Speaker 1: guys joined a great new church. It's a swinging culture 50 00:02:54,760 --> 00:02:58,200 Speaker 1: at your church. I mean, you know, I suppose anything 51 00:02:58,320 --> 00:03:01,040 Speaker 1: is possible, but quite frankly, this is the first time 52 00:03:01,080 --> 00:03:04,399 Speaker 1: I've ever heard of this, ever heard of this. We'll 53 00:03:04,440 --> 00:03:07,480 Speaker 1: see if Steve's ever heard of it when he gives 54 00:03:07,520 --> 00:03:10,480 Speaker 1: his answer. But you know, I gotta say this as 55 00:03:10,480 --> 00:03:13,120 Speaker 1: an aside. This is how you know that these letters 56 00:03:13,120 --> 00:03:16,320 Speaker 1: are not made up? That's the question we get a lot. 57 00:03:16,400 --> 00:03:19,360 Speaker 1: Do you make these letters up? How could we? How 58 00:03:19,440 --> 00:03:23,640 Speaker 1: can we think something like this up? This is real stuff. 59 00:03:23,680 --> 00:03:28,320 Speaker 1: We know we don't make these letters up. Okay, I'll 60 00:03:28,320 --> 00:03:31,040 Speaker 1: just tell you that as Christians in the church, this 61 00:03:31,160 --> 00:03:34,000 Speaker 1: is not what's supposed to be going on in church. 62 00:03:34,320 --> 00:03:36,880 Speaker 1: I don't know who your pastor is, what church this is. 63 00:03:37,120 --> 00:03:39,440 Speaker 1: You say it's a great new church, you say you 64 00:03:39,560 --> 00:03:41,840 Speaker 1: married the woman of your dreams. Well, the woman of 65 00:03:41,840 --> 00:03:45,880 Speaker 1: your dreams was swinging with someone else's husband. That's the 66 00:03:45,960 --> 00:03:50,480 Speaker 1: woman of your dreams, and you allowed it. I don't 67 00:03:50,560 --> 00:03:54,360 Speaker 1: understand what's going on in your marriage in this church 68 00:03:54,520 --> 00:03:59,040 Speaker 1: with all this swinging. I don't get it. But listen, 69 00:03:59,080 --> 00:04:03,280 Speaker 1: if you want to continue with your marriage, you're gonna 70 00:04:03,280 --> 00:04:07,480 Speaker 1: have to do something about this. I mean seriously. Because 71 00:04:07,640 --> 00:04:10,560 Speaker 1: your wife was into it and you weren't. That's that's 72 00:04:10,560 --> 00:04:14,960 Speaker 1: a problem. You didn't say that the other woman was unattractive. 73 00:04:15,480 --> 00:04:17,560 Speaker 1: You didn't say that. You just said you couldn't do 74 00:04:17,600 --> 00:04:20,080 Speaker 1: it for her. Yeah, you said you just couldn't do 75 00:04:20,120 --> 00:04:23,680 Speaker 1: it to her. The other female got very upset. You 76 00:04:23,720 --> 00:04:26,960 Speaker 1: wanted to plan okay, you wanted to plan another game night. 77 00:04:27,279 --> 00:04:30,039 Speaker 1: But they're still mad at you. So you know. My 78 00:04:30,120 --> 00:04:35,280 Speaker 1: advice to you guys is maybe you should join another 79 00:04:35,360 --> 00:04:38,600 Speaker 1: church where they don't swing and it's about you know, 80 00:04:38,839 --> 00:04:42,280 Speaker 1: Christianity and following Christ and things like that. I don't 81 00:04:42,279 --> 00:04:46,679 Speaker 1: know this this letter right here? Then people really do this, Steve, Yeah, 82 00:04:46,720 --> 00:04:50,680 Speaker 1: come on, I got it, Okay, go. This letter Safetified 83 00:04:50,800 --> 00:04:56,240 Speaker 1: and Saved Swingers is a letter feel with bad judgment. 84 00:04:57,839 --> 00:05:04,400 Speaker 1: This is a letter feel with bad judgment and poor understanding. 85 00:05:05,000 --> 00:05:10,000 Speaker 1: Let's start with bad judgment and poor understanding. I'm married 86 00:05:10,160 --> 00:05:14,520 Speaker 1: to the woman of my dreams who likes to sleep 87 00:05:14,640 --> 00:05:20,679 Speaker 1: with other men and get off doing it. Okay, that's 88 00:05:20,760 --> 00:05:24,479 Speaker 1: for starters. We move back to my home state and 89 00:05:24,600 --> 00:05:29,840 Speaker 1: we joined a great new church. The great new church 90 00:05:30,400 --> 00:05:38,039 Speaker 1: is filled with couples who swing. The whole letter is 91 00:05:38,080 --> 00:05:46,440 Speaker 1: a misunderstandings misrepresentation. The facts is blurred, you tripping dog. 92 00:05:47,000 --> 00:05:49,760 Speaker 1: And then on top of all this, you're a black 93 00:05:49,839 --> 00:05:53,400 Speaker 1: dude on your thirty that writes into a radio station. 94 00:05:55,839 --> 00:05:59,400 Speaker 1: Are you kidding me? You're married to the woman of 95 00:05:59,440 --> 00:06:04,120 Speaker 1: your dreams who wants to swing, and you joined a 96 00:06:04,160 --> 00:06:08,520 Speaker 1: great new church, and the church is full of swingers. 97 00:06:08,680 --> 00:06:11,720 Speaker 1: And you got a problem with both of these. You 98 00:06:12,000 --> 00:06:15,320 Speaker 1: friends with a young couple. You having problems with one couple. 99 00:06:15,680 --> 00:06:17,719 Speaker 1: Y'all used to hang out because you got close. You 100 00:06:17,800 --> 00:06:20,320 Speaker 1: double dated, and you had game night at day house, 101 00:06:20,480 --> 00:06:23,880 Speaker 1: not hours or hours. Then you decided to hear your 102 00:06:23,920 --> 00:06:27,880 Speaker 1: first swingers experience with the whoa hold apart? Y'all was 103 00:06:27,960 --> 00:06:34,040 Speaker 1: doing game night? Ain't that clue? Monopoly? Boggle? Hold on, man, 104 00:06:34,200 --> 00:06:39,880 Speaker 1: let's screw each other? Hold on? Okay? Well, at two 105 00:06:39,880 --> 00:06:43,880 Speaker 1: of your response coming up in twenty three minutes after 106 00:06:43,960 --> 00:06:47,520 Speaker 1: the hour. Sanctified and saved Swingers. That is the subject 107 00:06:47,560 --> 00:06:50,400 Speaker 1: of my strawberry letter for today. We'll get into it 108 00:06:50,600 --> 00:06:55,880 Speaker 1: right after this. You're listening, Steven show. All right, Steve, 109 00:06:55,880 --> 00:06:59,560 Speaker 1: come on, let's recap today's Strawberry letters subject sanctified and 110 00:06:59,680 --> 00:07:04,799 Speaker 1: saved swingers. Let's deal with this letter feel of misconceptions. 111 00:07:06,000 --> 00:07:09,360 Speaker 1: I'm married to the woman of my dreams, who he 112 00:07:09,440 --> 00:07:12,640 Speaker 1: finds out after they get married at game night, really 113 00:07:12,840 --> 00:07:16,480 Speaker 1: is a swinger. He goes back home to his home state, 114 00:07:16,520 --> 00:07:21,000 Speaker 1: and we joined a great new church. The great new 115 00:07:21,080 --> 00:07:23,760 Speaker 1: church is full of swingers. Let's go back to the 116 00:07:23,800 --> 00:07:29,480 Speaker 1: top of the letter, Sanctified and saved swingers. Now, just 117 00:07:29,560 --> 00:07:33,320 Speaker 1: because you saved does not mean you are seeing free. 118 00:07:34,000 --> 00:07:37,560 Speaker 1: So I ain't pass a judgment here. But save people 119 00:07:37,800 --> 00:07:43,440 Speaker 1: are nothing but sinners saved by grace. Please stop using 120 00:07:43,480 --> 00:07:53,120 Speaker 1: the words sanctified. That means holy and clean. All y'all 121 00:07:53,200 --> 00:07:57,960 Speaker 1: dirty in this one, y'all. Look now, if you're a 122 00:07:58,240 --> 00:08:02,720 Speaker 1: saved person, and you must admit, and once again, Uncle Steve, 123 00:08:02,720 --> 00:08:06,440 Speaker 1: ain't passing judgment, but you must know that this is 124 00:08:06,480 --> 00:08:11,360 Speaker 1: a scene to cover another man's wife to have an 125 00:08:11,360 --> 00:08:15,480 Speaker 1: affair to commit adultshire. You all, this is wrong. I 126 00:08:15,520 --> 00:08:19,160 Speaker 1: ain't judging you, but dog man, come on now. We 127 00:08:19,320 --> 00:08:22,680 Speaker 1: decided that they got really close to this couple of 128 00:08:22,760 --> 00:08:25,200 Speaker 1: days to hang out. We got really close and double dating. 129 00:08:25,760 --> 00:08:28,600 Speaker 1: The couple had game night at their house of hours 130 00:08:28,640 --> 00:08:31,679 Speaker 1: not too long ago. We decided to have our first 131 00:08:31,720 --> 00:08:35,840 Speaker 1: swingers experience with them. Hold up, it was game night. 132 00:08:36,720 --> 00:08:39,880 Speaker 1: It was it was clue, it was boggle. Y'all was 133 00:08:39,920 --> 00:08:47,599 Speaker 1: playing Spades, bid Whiz Monopoly. Sorry, I don't want to 134 00:08:47,640 --> 00:08:52,480 Speaker 1: be the cup. Y'all was playing clue. Who was dealing them? 135 00:08:52,520 --> 00:08:54,920 Speaker 1: Cause and said, you know what, ain't man? Hey man, 136 00:08:54,960 --> 00:08:57,880 Speaker 1: hold on, hold on, hold on, Let's screw each other. 137 00:09:00,559 --> 00:09:04,360 Speaker 1: Let's turn this card table like that. Let's put something 138 00:09:04,360 --> 00:09:09,960 Speaker 1: else on this table. Now, your wife has always wanted 139 00:09:10,000 --> 00:09:14,480 Speaker 1: to try, but you were a little skeptical. So y'all 140 00:09:14,559 --> 00:09:17,720 Speaker 1: was at the couple's house and they decided it was 141 00:09:17,760 --> 00:09:21,360 Speaker 1: time to try. It's like watching that Slingers commercial on 142 00:09:21,440 --> 00:09:24,400 Speaker 1: TV when that couple says, do you sling and that 143 00:09:24,559 --> 00:09:28,160 Speaker 1: dude when they started, but because he didn't know what 144 00:09:28,480 --> 00:09:32,560 Speaker 1: he said, y'all sw yeah, okay, cool, Well, your wife 145 00:09:32,600 --> 00:09:34,840 Speaker 1: was all into it and had a great time with 146 00:09:34,960 --> 00:09:37,920 Speaker 1: the guy. But I didn't hold up my end of 147 00:09:38,000 --> 00:09:42,000 Speaker 1: the deal. I just could not do it or her. 148 00:09:42,960 --> 00:09:46,800 Speaker 1: The other female got really upset. Now let's stop right here, 149 00:09:47,720 --> 00:09:51,560 Speaker 1: let's talk about what happened. Dog. You obviously wasn't happy 150 00:09:51,880 --> 00:09:56,480 Speaker 1: with them, because obviously she ain't fine as your wife. 151 00:09:58,080 --> 00:10:01,040 Speaker 1: So now you over here, you got bad into the stick. 152 00:10:01,200 --> 00:10:06,280 Speaker 1: The other dude happy, your wife cool, his wife cool. 153 00:10:06,559 --> 00:10:10,880 Speaker 1: You upset? You know why you upset? You wouldn't have 154 00:10:10,880 --> 00:10:13,640 Speaker 1: married her. No, damn what you have said to yourself 155 00:10:13,679 --> 00:10:16,080 Speaker 1: at several games, not to hear he married her? For 156 00:10:16,520 --> 00:10:20,280 Speaker 1: next thing? You know, you sleeping with it? And and 157 00:10:20,520 --> 00:10:26,240 Speaker 1: I got news for you. You can't perform in front 158 00:10:26,240 --> 00:10:31,920 Speaker 1: of other people. And the reason you can't perform in 159 00:10:31,960 --> 00:10:34,800 Speaker 1: front of other people, dog, is you just really ain't 160 00:10:34,840 --> 00:10:39,040 Speaker 1: that good at it. You ain't donk, you just ain't 161 00:10:39,040 --> 00:10:41,560 Speaker 1: that good at it. Everybody ain't good at sex like 162 00:10:41,679 --> 00:10:44,559 Speaker 1: that any time anywhere. See you met the girl of 163 00:10:44,640 --> 00:10:47,199 Speaker 1: your dream, that's all you wanted. You ain't good at 164 00:10:47,200 --> 00:10:50,320 Speaker 1: this other stuff. You ain't no player. And even when 165 00:10:50,320 --> 00:10:52,840 Speaker 1: you're performing, that's why your girl wanted to try to 166 00:10:52,920 --> 00:10:56,520 Speaker 1: swingle stuff anything because she had to try something because 167 00:10:56,600 --> 00:10:59,839 Speaker 1: you ain't trying to baking at the house yourself. Any 168 00:11:00,080 --> 00:11:03,040 Speaker 1: time you see a woman wanting to step outside the relationship, 169 00:11:03,320 --> 00:11:05,760 Speaker 1: it's usually cause something you ain't doing at the house. 170 00:11:05,920 --> 00:11:07,800 Speaker 1: So you ain't at the house frying to bacon like 171 00:11:07,840 --> 00:11:09,200 Speaker 1: you want. I know you didn't want to hear this 172 00:11:09,240 --> 00:11:11,400 Speaker 1: part from a little thirty year old black dude, but 173 00:11:11,480 --> 00:11:14,480 Speaker 1: you might as well hid. You just ain't that good 174 00:11:14,520 --> 00:11:17,920 Speaker 1: at it, and so now you want to go back 175 00:11:17,960 --> 00:11:20,079 Speaker 1: over there. And then my wife has always wanted to try. 176 00:11:20,559 --> 00:11:22,800 Speaker 1: My wife was into it. I couldn't do it. The 177 00:11:22,880 --> 00:11:26,440 Speaker 1: other female got upset. So when things simme it down, 178 00:11:26,679 --> 00:11:29,360 Speaker 1: we left a few days later, I reached out to 179 00:11:29,400 --> 00:11:32,120 Speaker 1: the guy to play in another game. Now, then the 180 00:11:32,160 --> 00:11:34,960 Speaker 1: guy told you here and his wife still mad because 181 00:11:35,000 --> 00:11:38,760 Speaker 1: I didn't satisfy his wife. He said, our friendship at 182 00:11:38,800 --> 00:11:42,520 Speaker 1: one side. It See, I satisfied your wife. Your wife 183 00:11:42,600 --> 00:11:46,240 Speaker 1: satisfied me. But you can't do nothing to brun Hilton. Now, 184 00:11:46,240 --> 00:11:48,680 Speaker 1: brun Hilda sitting over there with her mouth stuck out, 185 00:11:50,480 --> 00:11:53,440 Speaker 1: because obviously you can't handle it. Brun Hild, big girl. 186 00:11:54,679 --> 00:11:56,960 Speaker 1: Look now I can't say big girl. Let's just say, 187 00:11:57,040 --> 00:12:01,000 Speaker 1: molding you can handle. So now here you go. So 188 00:12:01,080 --> 00:12:02,679 Speaker 1: I reached out the guy. You on a plan that, 189 00:12:02,800 --> 00:12:06,600 Speaker 1: he said, the fishop one side, and I thought we 190 00:12:06,679 --> 00:12:12,000 Speaker 1: all had bonded. See once again he go, you thinking again. 191 00:12:12,880 --> 00:12:15,240 Speaker 1: He thought you had the woman to your dream. He 192 00:12:15,400 --> 00:12:18,200 Speaker 1: thought you was at a great church. You thought everybody 193 00:12:18,360 --> 00:12:21,120 Speaker 1: was saved and sanctified, and then you thought we all 194 00:12:21,160 --> 00:12:23,720 Speaker 1: had bonded and it would be something great in private 195 00:12:23,800 --> 00:12:26,800 Speaker 1: between us. We saw him at church Sunday. They barely 196 00:12:26,800 --> 00:12:30,520 Speaker 1: spoke to us. I should have followed my first mind 197 00:12:30,559 --> 00:12:33,240 Speaker 1: and not even tried it. Now everybody know you ain't nothing. 198 00:12:33,760 --> 00:12:36,280 Speaker 1: How can we fix this and save face of our church? 199 00:12:36,760 --> 00:12:39,960 Speaker 1: And with these saved swinger you't started bringing it, Pardner, 200 00:12:41,160 --> 00:12:46,000 Speaker 1: that's all you got. You ain't got it the whole 201 00:12:46,080 --> 00:12:49,040 Speaker 1: damn church. You don't even fit in this church called 202 00:12:49,080 --> 00:12:52,640 Speaker 1: they slanging up in there. Thank you Steve post your 203 00:12:52,720 --> 00:12:58,240 Speaker 1: comments on Today's Strawberry Letter and Steve Swingle and you 204 00:12:58,320 --> 00:13:02,319 Speaker 1: don't have a good slanger. Check out this job should 205 00:13:04,000 --> 00:13:07,240 Speaker 1: on demand coming up at forty six minutes after the hour. 206 00:13:07,440 --> 00:13:11,559 Speaker 1: Stop panic buying stuff due to the coronavirus. We'll tell 207 00:13:11,600 --> 00:13:14,839 Speaker 1: you about it right after this you're listening to The 208 00:13:15,080 --> 00:13:16,439 Speaker 1: Dave Harvey Morning Show.