Speaker 1: Ka boom. If you thought four hours a day, minutes
Speaker 1: a week was enough, I think again. He's the last
Speaker 1: remnants of the old Republic, a sole fashion of fairness.
Speaker 1: He treats crackheads in the ghetto gutter the same as
Speaker 1: the rich pill poppers in the penthouse. The clearing House
Speaker 1: of Hot takes break free for something special. The Fifth
Speaker 1: Hour with Ben Maller starts right now. It is the
Speaker 1: Fifth Hour with Ben Miller and David Yes, so we
Speaker 1: are in the air everywhere. The vast power of podcasting
Speaker 1: now eight days a week, because four hours are not
Speaker 1: enough on the Overnight and this I assume you figured
Speaker 1: this out now by downloading the podcast and subscribing and
Speaker 1: giving his five stars. But this is a spinoff of
Speaker 1: the Overnight Show. And this is what we call technically
Speaker 1: guessc on an evergreen podcast, which means that at any
Speaker 1: particular moment, if something crazy happens, we will go to
Speaker 1: this archive of evergreen podcast and here it is why
Speaker 1: I'm bad, Thank you, ma'am. And since we are in
Speaker 1: an evergreen mode, I get to not acknowledge the time lauds.
Speaker 1: But the Ben Mallard family sent a couple of couple
Speaker 1: of books my wife. I appreciate that sub right in
Speaker 1: the birthday and style. I gotta point out I like
Speaker 1: the fact that I immediately right after I say this
Speaker 1: is an evergreen podcast, you will immediately date the podcast. No,
Speaker 1: I didn't date the podcast. This is very ambiguous. No,
Speaker 1: it's not. Anybody listening knows exactly when we did this podcast.
Speaker 1: Because of your response, you have just dated the podcast.
Speaker 1: It literally a minute of me saying it's an evergreen podcast.
Speaker 1: Do you know what the word evergreen means? Yeah, of
Speaker 1: course they do. But what date did I give? What
Speaker 1: time did I give? I gave nothing of the sore
Speaker 1: it's twenty funny. We're indoors. We're in quarantine. So that's
Speaker 1: all people can speculate as to what time of the year.
Speaker 1: It is, somewhere between January and December. I'm gonna push
Speaker 1: back on that because you let me point something here.
Speaker 1: People listen. You don't understand how the Mallem militia operates.
Speaker 1: They listen to every stupid minute detail that gets said,
Speaker 1: and they can connect the dots backwards. These people have
Speaker 1: no lives, you understand. Some of these people have no lives,
Speaker 1: and they investigate everything. They have said, you have just dated.
Speaker 1: I would like you to apologize right now, how dare you? Well,
Speaker 1: there's one thing I've learned, at least that you have
Speaker 1: taught me, is that you want that you never apologize
Speaker 1: and to you never take the knee. So I'm not
Speaker 1: gonna apologize. I'm not gonna bend the knee. I'm not
Speaker 1: gonna genuine flagged and I haven't given any dates or time.
Speaker 1: So let's let's push on, Shelley. Alright, So on this again, Gascon,
Speaker 1: stay with me evergreen podcast, which is which is another
Speaker 1: way to say it is and this is timeless. This
Speaker 1: podcast is timeless and it will stand the many challenges
Speaker 1: of time, the corrosion of the elements and all of
Speaker 1: that stuff. So we will avoid all of that because again, Gascon,
Speaker 1: it is an evergreen podcast, which is very very important.
Speaker 1: So this podcast, we're gonna take a look at the
Speaker 1: type of people that call sports talk radio. Now, I
Speaker 1: had mentioned this years ago on the show, and I
Speaker 1: haven't done this in a long time, but there aren't
Speaker 1: too many of call in radio shows left. A lot
Speaker 1: of these sports talk show host uh, they don't want
Speaker 1: anything to do with the callers. The unwashed that call in.
Speaker 1: And so we're one of the last of the Mohegans
Speaker 1: that takes phone calls. A lot of the other shows
Speaker 1: just don't do it because for whatever reason they is
Speaker 1: think it's below them to talk to the people that
Speaker 1: listen to the show. So we still do it, but
Speaker 1: there are generally only a few types of people that
Speaker 1: call into sports talk radio shows. And and I'm gonna
Speaker 1: it's not a list, guess, because the list would be wrong.
Speaker 1: We don't do list radio here. That's something that you do,
Speaker 1: but we don't do that. But there are essentially ten
Speaker 1: types of people that we've compartmentalized that call into these
Speaker 1: radio shows. All right, So if we're not gonna do
Speaker 1: a list, does that mean we're gonna do like a
Speaker 1: pie chart or bar graph? Like how are you how
Speaker 1: are you designing this for the masses? Since that's a
Speaker 1: great question. It's like a ven diagram. I've got vent
Speaker 1: diagram out of here, so just imagine in your head
Speaker 1: event diagram. So we're not doing a mount Rushmore radio
Speaker 1: or list radio. We're doing even diagram radio. Is what
Speaker 1: we can't do Mount Rushmore radio because that sooner later
Speaker 1: will be canceled too. So we can't do that. Yeah,
Speaker 1: so exactly. So the goal here is to try to
Speaker 1: figure out which of our regular callers on the overnight show,
Speaker 1: which of my guys is in this particular department. So, uh,
Speaker 1: the first caller that we have that And these are
Speaker 1: all the types of people that call sports talk radio shows.
Speaker 1: The the first one I have written down here on
Speaker 1: my chicken scratch is the guy that's addicted to calling.
Speaker 1: And I have more of these type of people than
Speaker 1: than anybody else. Uh. And if you listen to sports radio,
Speaker 1: you know that this is the type of person that
Speaker 1: is so obsessed with not the host, not me, and
Speaker 1: it's not the show. They're just obsessed with calling in
Speaker 1: to any show. And it doesn't matter whether it's a
Speaker 1: sports show, they call in political shows. Um. Typically the
Speaker 1: problem is they don't normally have any material, so they
Speaker 1: really shouldn't be calling radio shows. But these are the
Speaker 1: type of people. And if you listen to other shows,
Speaker 1: and not just the Ben Mallor Show, but other shows,
Speaker 1: you'll hear the same people on over and over and
Speaker 1: over and sometimes now there's two different types of the
Speaker 1: addicted to calling, and it's the ky that has nothing
Speaker 1: to say, And then there's the guy that has some agenda,
Speaker 1: which is actually a different kind of caller. But they
Speaker 1: have a certain format they follow and every show they call,
Speaker 1: they do the same thing, and typically it's never that good. Uh,
Speaker 1: it's never original. And uh, we have a lot of
Speaker 1: these guys. Uh, and some of them I like, like
Speaker 1: Dick and Dayton comes to mind. Dick's been calling radio
Speaker 1: shows forever. Usually doesn't that much to say. Marcel in
Speaker 1: Brooklyn is is another guy. Marcell's addicted to calling radio shows. Well,
Speaker 1: I think Marcell is a little bit different because you
Speaker 1: purposely antagonize him and encourage him to call your show
Speaker 1: because you know what upsets the masses. That's a that's
Speaker 1: a little bit different. Well, he is a caller of
Speaker 1: the year. I know you don't respect those kind of
Speaker 1: you know, kind of awards that that you get in life,
Speaker 1: but he is a caller of the year. He's he's
Speaker 1: reached certainly a more decorated spot the mallamlish than you.
Speaker 1: But but no, So anyways, just I just wanted that's
Speaker 1: the first type of person that calls radio goes the
Speaker 1: person who's addicted the calling. Uh. Then some of the
Speaker 1: other types of people that call, we've got the person
Speaker 1: that's always interrupting, um, and you know, this kind of
Speaker 1: falls into that, Hey, I'm inebriated, I'm having a good time,
Speaker 1: I'm feeling no pain, I'm I'm doing the Molly wally,
Speaker 1: uh and that kind of thing. But usually, and you know,
Speaker 1: gets gonna like the back and forth, the ebb and
Speaker 1: flow of a conversation on a radio show, it's uh,
Speaker 1: you ta, I introduce you as the caller, you talk
Speaker 1: for a little bit, then I talk, and then you talk,
Speaker 1: and then I talk, and then usually it's over at
Speaker 1: that particular point. Be sure to catch live editions on
Speaker 1: The Ben Maller Show weekdays at two a m. Eastern
Speaker 1: eleven pm Pacific on Fox Sports Radio and the I
Speaker 1: Heart Radio. Wow, can we call this the Looney color
Speaker 1: because it seems like, at least back in the day
Speaker 1: when you worked with that infamous doctor Tom Looney, you
Speaker 1: guys did have conversations, but it was always like you
Speaker 1: were talking over him. He was talking over you, and
Speaker 1: nobody could hear anything coherent from what you guys were
Speaker 1: saying at any given time. Well, I know you're jealous
Speaker 1: of looney success in broadcasting, and how popular Looney was
Speaker 1: on that Litch show in a w ening show. But
Speaker 1: but there is a certain kind of verbal rat a
Speaker 1: tat tat ballet or whatever, that that is supposed to
Speaker 1: take place. And we get people that call up that
Speaker 1: have no concept of how this is supposed to work,
Speaker 1: and it is cringe worthy. It is uncomfortable, it is awkward.
Speaker 1: And that's only on my end. I can't imagine if
Speaker 1: you're listening to this crap what that must sound like.
Speaker 1: So you know, that's that's another one. You you know,
Speaker 1: just if you're gonna call in just trying to understand
Speaker 1: it's conversation. Yeah, there's people he's dropping into the conversation.
Speaker 1: But ultimately, for this to work, it's a conversation between
Speaker 1: the host and whoever's calling it. Of course it's like
Speaker 1: a nice casual dance. But but yeah, four hours that
Speaker 1: you get a lot of it, and I think oftentimes
Speaker 1: too much. Yeah, some of the other types of callers
Speaker 1: we get on the Ben Mallory Show and sports talk
Speaker 1: radio in general. The here's one of my favorites, they
Speaker 1: remember me guy. I get a lot of the remember
Speaker 1: me guy. And now I am not talking here gascon
Speaker 1: about the regulars that call the show all the time. Um,
Speaker 1: and you know the guys that have called me. When
Speaker 1: one guy called me when he was like, you know fifteen,
Speaker 1: I have a few of these people like fifteen, all
Speaker 1: of a sudden there twenty six or nine. They got
Speaker 1: a wife, they've got kids, you know that whole thing. Uh,
Speaker 1: it's it's it's not so much that it's not about
Speaker 1: the guy who randomly every other year will call you
Speaker 1: up and then try to reference the previous conversation that
Speaker 1: you had, right, you know, keep on. Most of these
Speaker 1: calls are like two and a half minutes, three minutes
Speaker 1: at the most, and uh, you know, you gotta remember me,
Speaker 1: and they get they get upset if you don't remember. Now,
Speaker 1: I have a pretty good memory for this. I remember
Speaker 1: a lot of these conversations, but not all of them.
Speaker 1: And then they want you to remember their their kids
Speaker 1: name or their dog's name something like that, and like,
Speaker 1: how does that even work? Now? Now full disclosure on this.
Speaker 1: Are are you talking about the actual callers that call
Speaker 1: on the show and say hey, remember me? Are you
Speaker 1: talking about the callers that's somehow finagle away to find
Speaker 1: your your own cell phone and then call you up
Speaker 1: on your cell phone, remember me. Well that's a whole
Speaker 1: different animal, the the personal cell phone, which I should change.
Speaker 1: But everyone I know in the business has that numbers.
Speaker 1: Oh I have. I feel like I have to keep
Speaker 1: the number. So I also get those uncomfortable phone calls
Speaker 1: from Doc Mike every week about drinking my own piss
Speaker 1: and the and those kind of things, which is which
Speaker 1: is great. But that but then remember me guy? Uh yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean that's just you know, chances are I'm not
Speaker 1: gonna remember you, and maybe I will remember you. But
Speaker 1: do we really need to waste time talking about how
Speaker 1: I remember you? Is that important? Yeah? Some of the
Speaker 1: other types of calls we have and looking at the
Speaker 1: not this is not a list. This is a VEN diagram,
Speaker 1: the ven diagram that we're using here. So you have
Speaker 1: the I told you so guy Gascon. Now, this is
Speaker 1: a raging lunatic. This type of guy is a raging
Speaker 1: lunatic who will call in right after his prediction like
Speaker 1: I don't know, I let's just use a super Bowl.
Speaker 1: I picked the Chiefs and Patrick has to win the
Speaker 1: Super Bowl. I told you you're that guy, obnoxious asshole.
Speaker 1: You just want to punch the guy in the face,
Speaker 1: that guy who probably made the prediction a couple of
Speaker 1: days before said Super Bowl or a week before or whatever.
Speaker 1: And then he is cannot wait to call in and
Speaker 1: pat himself on the back and gloat about how wonderful
Speaker 1: this person is and what a genius he is and
Speaker 1: everyone needs to listen to him. Uh. And of course
Speaker 1: we know that that is a total fraud. Uh and
Speaker 1: all that stuff because that same caller. What does that
Speaker 1: caller never do? Gascon never calls this team loses exactly,
Speaker 1: he vanishes. He vanishes. He never calls and said, well,
Speaker 1: I got that one wrong, that job by me. That
Speaker 1: never happens. The only time that person calls back is
Speaker 1: when they got it right. Otherwise they don't make a
Speaker 1: return phone call. So therefore there schmuck to prick and
Speaker 1: screw them. That reminds me of a couple of guys
Speaker 1: that used to call your show back in two thousands
Speaker 1: seventeen from Houston. I would talk a lot about that,
Speaker 1: and then all of a sudden, when the Houston Texans
Speaker 1: would crumble in the postseason or the Eastern Rockets, they
Speaker 1: could be nowhere to be found. So a little bit
Speaker 1: different with the Astros cheating their way to the World
Speaker 1: Series a couple of years ago. Well, and there that
Speaker 1: is the difference. So like, because I mean, the difference
Speaker 1: to this is really like I have to show up.
Speaker 1: Like when the Clippers go out and have the Tennessee
Speaker 1: Trots in a playoff game against the Rockets, I gotta
Speaker 1: come in here and talk. Or when the Rams go
Speaker 1: out and shift the bed against the Patriots in the
Speaker 1: Super Bowl, I still got to come in here and
Speaker 1: do the show. It would be a lot easier if
Speaker 1: I didn't. Now, sometimes it has worked out to my advantage.
Speaker 1: Where I had a scheduled day off Ember one year,
Speaker 1: the Clippers lost in the playoffs in the Lob City Days,
Speaker 1: and people thought I was running for the hills. I wasn't.
Speaker 1: I had a scheduled day off, I had a trip
Speaker 1: to Vegas and uh, and people thought I was I
Speaker 1: was like dodging, and I wasn't. It just happened. I
Speaker 1: didn't know that that series was gonna go all the way.
Speaker 1: I think they were playing that, like I said, the
Speaker 1: jazz I think and then they thought I was up
Speaker 1: some shady stuff. But I wasn't. So anyway, to be fair, though,
Speaker 1: some people want you at your lowest point because it
Speaker 1: does provide riveting talk radio. No, no, I'm at no, No,
Speaker 1: I'm at my best guest gon when I am on
Speaker 1: top of the mountain and I am basking in the
Speaker 1: greatness of wonderful success for my teams. Well, I mean,
Speaker 1: if you want to go through that, I don't know
Speaker 1: the last time any of your teams actually had butterfide success.
Speaker 1: So you can go back the Rams, the Clippers, well,
Speaker 1: hold on, sick. The Clippers just won a championship not
Speaker 1: that long ago, the Kawhi Leonard Championship. That's a championship
Speaker 1: that the Lakers wanted, the Toronto Raptors wanted, but the
Speaker 1: l A Clippers won the Kawhi Leonard Championship. The l
Speaker 1: A Rams when the NFC Championship beating that punk Drew
Speaker 1: Brees and then New Orleans Saints. By the way, Drew
Speaker 1: just apologized again. I just want you to know he's
Speaker 1: apologized again. And uh and then the the you know,
Speaker 1: the the other team, the Dodgers back to back World
Speaker 1: Series a couple of years ago. So yeah, I think
Speaker 1: I think the last time, I think lost time any
Speaker 1: of your teams actually want anything with two thousand and
Speaker 1: four team this l King's long their second Stanley Cup
Speaker 1: in three years, so that's the last time any of
Speaker 1: your teams have walked off of the championship. Be sure
Speaker 1: to catch live editions of The Ben Miller Show weekdays
Speaker 1: at two a m. Eastern eleven pm Pacific. So that
Speaker 1: moving on here on the event diagram we have, we
Speaker 1: went from the I Told You soap caller, which is
Speaker 1: always a staple of sports radio, to the conspiracy guy
Speaker 1: conspiracy guy, which I love, right, I love Now. The
Speaker 1: great thing about making predictions in sports is that you're
Speaker 1: going to be right approximately ninete percent of the time.
Speaker 1: Because you say, in the NFL is thirty two teams,
Speaker 1: only one of them is going to be standing on
Speaker 1: top of the mount at the end and win the
Speaker 1: Super Bowl. So if you say a team is not
Speaker 1: going to win the Super Bowl, you have a thirty
Speaker 1: one out of thirty two chants of being correct. Right.
Speaker 1: It's not even really that much because some teams are
Speaker 1: not even trying to win. Uh, And you can say
Speaker 1: that obviously the numbers are different depending on how many
Speaker 1: teams there are, but most of the time teams simply
Speaker 1: lose because you know they're not good enough for the
Speaker 1: players didn't perform well you know, standard standard stuff by
Speaker 1: the books and all that stuff. But the conspiracy guy
Speaker 1: calls up and the team didn't lose because they weren't
Speaker 1: good enough. They lost because the other team was up
Speaker 1: to some shinani. Right, And now there is proof with
Speaker 1: the Astros and so that is I didn't see that
Speaker 1: one coming, but there is proof of that. But oftentimes
Speaker 1: there's no tangible evidence to back up the claims. But
Speaker 1: you get the hey, this this game, that game is
Speaker 1: thrown and all that stuff, and uh or blame the officials,
Speaker 1: but it's some kind of conspiracy that that type of
Speaker 1: caller always brings up. And the only, the only time
Speaker 1: in the history of the show where this really played
Speaker 1: wonderfully was and it was a pre act. It was
Speaker 1: a pre emptive shot. I had a guy from Boston
Speaker 1: who might or might not be a made man in
Speaker 1: Boston who called me up before a random Pirates Cardinals
Speaker 1: series when the Cardinals were good, they had LaRussa as
Speaker 1: their manager and Albert Poojos and the Pirates were dogshit
Speaker 1: and he said, hey, he says, I got a tip.
Speaker 1: He says I got a tip. He says, you gotta
Speaker 1: bet on the Pirates. They're gonna sweep the Cardinals this weekend,
Speaker 1: and just bet on them, you know, let it, let
Speaker 1: it run, you know, let it roll. And uh. I
Speaker 1: was like, this guy is full of you know, he's
Speaker 1: full of happy. You don't know what he's talking about.
Speaker 1: And the Pirates won the first game. I was like, oh,
Speaker 1: wait a minute. So they won the second game and
Speaker 1: then and then they sure enough, and one of those
Speaker 1: games was like extra innings, and then they ended up
Speaker 1: winning all the games. The guy said they were gonna win.
Speaker 1: It was unbelievable. So you don't you don't subscribe to
Speaker 1: any kind of conspiracy theory about the Music City Miracle,
Speaker 1: then right, probably you acknowledge that that play was legit
Speaker 1: and that was a bush. That was a bullshit. That
Speaker 1: was an illegal forward past that was not called by
Speaker 1: the officials on the field or on instant replay. They
Speaker 1: were there holding their dicks. They had no idea what
Speaker 1: to do. It was embarrassing. It was It was a
Speaker 1: dark day in the history of the NFL, and it
Speaker 1: really fucked the Buffalo Bills franchise up. You know, I'm
Speaker 1: I'm an honorary member of Bill's mafia. So I'm offended,
Speaker 1: all right, Moving on again, these are the types of
Speaker 1: people to call sports radio shows. Here's another one on
Speaker 1: the event diagram, The old guy. I love the old
Speaker 1: guy that calls up. I get so many old guys
Speaker 1: that call up. Now. We dominate the older demographic on
Speaker 1: the Ben Mallther Show, and I have no problem. You know,
Speaker 1: elitist west of the four oh five guys like Gascon. Yeah,
Speaker 1: you look down upon older people. I I learned Guscon
Speaker 1: to respect my elders. You, of course do not, But
Speaker 1: I do not mind taking calls from from the older
Speaker 1: people that call up, right. It's it's hey, when when
Speaker 1: the guy drinking the Grandpa juse calls up and he
Speaker 1: can't sleep because he's got insomnia in the middle of
Speaker 1: the night and he can't go to the bathroom because
Speaker 1: he's got other problems there, or he goes to the
Speaker 1: bathroom too much. Ah, this is the highlight of their
Speaker 1: night calling into the show, and they've usually got pretty
Speaker 1: good stories to tell. You just gotta dig below the
Speaker 1: surface a little bit. Yeah, I think maybe a little
Speaker 1: bit of pushback on that is you're more relatable to
Speaker 1: the older crowd. You're more relatable to the sixty five
Speaker 1: and older, where I have this wide range of you know,
Speaker 1: I can relate to the twenty year olds, at thirty
Speaker 1: year olds of forty year olds, And part of the
Speaker 1: reason is because I don't trigger people like you do
Speaker 1: every so often. So yeah, I think that's why you're
Speaker 1: more inclined to be relatable to the seventy two and over. Well,
Speaker 1: here's it. I'm relatable to the blue collar worker. I'm
Speaker 1: relatable to the person of the factory, the person driving
Speaker 1: the truck, the person person working a grocery, star stocking shows.
Speaker 1: You're relatable to the asshole on top of the mountain
Speaker 1: mansion in Beverly Hills or out in the Hamptons in
Speaker 1: New York or Scottsdale. Uh, yeah, you're that type of person.
Speaker 1: So you're relatable to the to the very wealthy, the aristocrats,
Speaker 1: And I'm relatable to the people that bust their ass
Speaker 1: and work their work, work the tail off to make pennies. Well,
Speaker 1: don't forget that one percent actually provides the jobs for
Speaker 1: the other percent, So there's nothing wrong with that. They're
Speaker 1: the ones that pay the bills. But not when the
Speaker 1: Marxists take over. When the Marxist takeover, guess guy, it's
Speaker 1: not gonna be the jig is up, guest guy, and
Speaker 1: you're gonna have to move out of West of the
Speaker 1: four oh five. So but again, the old timers, Uh,
Speaker 1: this is a big thing for these guys. Uh, and
Speaker 1: and some of the things we have Skeener in Montana.
Speaker 1: Who qualifies as that? I guess Doc Mike, Doc Mike.
Speaker 1: He's not your typical old time caller. But Doc is
Speaker 1: in his seventies and he's still he's been calling me
Speaker 1: since he was in his fifties, and a lot of
Speaker 1: my regular guys are older. I haven't heard from Helmet
Speaker 1: Man in a while. No, he's not in his seventies.
Speaker 1: I think Helmet Man is probably in his late fifties,
Speaker 1: early sixties, I would think. But we have not heard
Speaker 1: from him in a while as we're doing this evergreen podcast,
Speaker 1: So hopefully helping Man's all right. But but the old
Speaker 1: guy calls up and you know, typically be like I
Speaker 1: like it the way it was back in the old days,
Speaker 1: you know that kind of thing, you know, back in
Speaker 1: my day, And uh, yeah, So who who doesn't enjoy
Speaker 1: a good back in my day rant or get off
Speaker 1: my lawn, And it's kind of an ode to one
Speaker 1: of your favorite guests, Fred Dryer, Yes, the great Fred
Speaker 1: Dryer who just had a birthday and not that long ago,
Speaker 1: the great Fred Dryer, of course. And I know you
Speaker 1: don't like Fred because you don't like Hollywood and you
Speaker 1: don't like guys that crossed over from the NFL. But
Speaker 1: Freend's a good guy. Be sure to catch live editions
Speaker 1: of The Ben Maller Show weekdays at two a m.
Speaker 1: Eastern eleven pm Pacific. Alright, so guess Scott the next
Speaker 1: I'm looking at my my ven diagram here. So the
Speaker 1: next type of regular caller that calls into sports talk
Speaker 1: radio is the blind supporter guy. The blind supporter guy. Now,
Speaker 1: this is the kool aid drinking, brainwashed, mesmerized fan boy,
Speaker 1: which I am generally offended by. Now. I like the
Speaker 1: teams I like, but I am the first one to
Speaker 1: rip them and to take pot shots when the When
Speaker 1: the Clippers play like crap, or the Rams or the
Speaker 1: Dodgers or any of the teams that I support, I
Speaker 1: will unload on them. But this blind supporter guy fan boy,
Speaker 1: if you will, will not the greatest example this would
Speaker 1: be Chris and Houston. Now Christopher called up one of
Speaker 1: the great calls. When I write a book, someday, I'm
Speaker 1: gonna write about this. So the night the jig was
Speaker 1: up with the Astros and all of their cheating, when
Speaker 1: the Athletic report came out and detailed everything from Mike
Speaker 1: fires on how the Astros were cheating, all these videos
Speaker 1: popped up confirming what was in the athletic story with
Speaker 1: audio and video of what was going on in the
Speaker 1: Bang Bang for the Astros to know what was going on,
Speaker 1: whether it was a fastball or a breaking ball to tell.
Speaker 1: And we took a phone call that night talking about
Speaker 1: seizing the day. We took a phone call from Chris
Speaker 1: and Houston who probably had his Astros onesie on and
Speaker 1: uh and he had his his Altobe Alboub fathead, and
Speaker 1: he said, there's no proof those videos were photos shop,
Speaker 1: I need proof and U. He went on this big
Speaker 1: rant and then of course they were is in hundreds
Speaker 1: of videos that were on YouTube that it all commenced
Speaker 1: at the same time there and it just shows you
Speaker 1: how you really look like an imbecile when when you
Speaker 1: do that. And then it is the other type of
Speaker 1: fanboy call though, that whenever you say anything even mildly
Speaker 1: critical about a player or a team, these people call
Speaker 1: up and just go ballistic, Oh, I I have to
Speaker 1: support my you know. It's like their children. It's like
Speaker 1: they're treating their team like they're their players, like they're
Speaker 1: their kids. It's well disturbing. What I guess what fan
Speaker 1: base is most synonymous with this? Is this a Yankees fan?
Speaker 1: Is this a Lakers fan? Is this a Cowboys fan?
Speaker 1: Or well, it's it's yeah, I mean, it's the I
Speaker 1: would say the Laker historians are are over the top.
Speaker 1: You of course are part of that. You're you're cuddled
Speaker 1: up with fan of James right now, you and you
Speaker 1: and it's a little place over there in Brentwood. Um.
Speaker 1: But yeah, the Lakers, the Cowboys. O. The Cowboys have
Speaker 1: been kicked in the nuts a lot recently. But the
Speaker 1: holy trinity would be Yankees, Lakers, Cowboys, the most obnoxious, annoying,
Speaker 1: despicable fan bases. But that's not a list, Gascon. This
Speaker 1: is a Evan diagram. Yes, yes, it is so, yes,
Speaker 1: all right, So some of the other types of yahoo's
Speaker 1: the call into these shows you you have the insider guy. Now, guess, Scott,
Speaker 1: do you know what the insider guy is? Yeah, you
Speaker 1: have infamously have blind Scott on the East Coast, who
Speaker 1: is one of your your one of your traders, one
Speaker 1: of your daytime traders. He's got inset information for you
Speaker 1: to do some stock trading. Uh, the same, the same
Speaker 1: thing that's applicable on the sports side of things. No, no, no, no, no,
Speaker 1: this is uh, this is hey. My barber cooks the
Speaker 1: hair of Jerry Jones dog, you know, Jerry Jones Son
Speaker 1: and told me so and so and you know, told
Speaker 1: me that cowboys are gonna release Dak Prescott, right, They're
Speaker 1: gonna release Dak Prescott. Um and so it's it's the
Speaker 1: person that calls up with claiming to have insider knowledge. Now,
Speaker 1: I will say, guess, to be fair to this insider guy,
Speaker 1: there have been maybe a handful of times that I
Speaker 1: have gotten phone calls from people claiming to be the
Speaker 1: insider guy trying to climb the social ladder, and it
Speaker 1: turned out to be true. But the vast majority, the
Speaker 1: vast majority of these type of situations is total bullshit
Speaker 1: and there's no truth to it at all. It's just
Speaker 1: made up mumbo jumbo. Every every once in a while
Speaker 1: it is actually the would you consider Sports Talk with
Speaker 1: Barry and Insider? I love Barry. I get a kick
Speaker 1: out of Barry. Anytime I see a story that looks
Speaker 1: like it should be fake, I think it's got to
Speaker 1: be a Berry story. And then oftentimes it's not a
Speaker 1: Berry story. Yeah times, or it's so good that it
Speaker 1: actually happens two, three, four months down the road. Yeah yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: Well where satire becomes reality right where satire intersects with
Speaker 1: reality and it takes a while. But so if you
Speaker 1: listen to sports talk radio enough, the Ben Maller Show,
Speaker 1: or any of these other shows that take calls, there's
Speaker 1: not many of them left. Were the last of the Mohegans.
Speaker 1: You will hear insider guy calling up and working his
Speaker 1: his magic is what you will hear. So what else
Speaker 1: do we have? We got a few more here. I
Speaker 1: know we've got to skit dattle, but we have the
Speaker 1: the business guy. Now, the business guy is we don't
Speaker 1: get a lot of these guys because we're a blue
Speaker 1: collar show. These are more daytime type of callers. The
Speaker 1: business guy. Uh, but they'll call up and try to
Speaker 1: brag about their credentials. Anytime you hear somebody call the
Speaker 1: radio show and talk about how they went to medical
Speaker 1: school or law school, you know, they're full of bullshit
Speaker 1: right there. But anybody calls up to demonstrate how credible
Speaker 1: they are, right Like, we've talked a lot during the
Speaker 1: pandemic about labor negotiations with baseball and these other sports
Speaker 1: leagues and things like that. So then you've got a
Speaker 1: guy that calls up, you know, I've I've practiced labor
Speaker 1: law for fifteen years in Manhattan in my younger days,
Speaker 1: and then tries to tell you exactly what's going on
Speaker 1: because they're they've got this glowing resume, and then they
Speaker 1: know exactly what they're talking about. And oftentimes this is
Speaker 1: just bullshit. It's just a way for you to It's
Speaker 1: like a pissing contest to show you show everyone how
Speaker 1: smart you are. Painting the ask well. On one occasion, though,
Speaker 1: we have had an East Coast doctor that listens to
Speaker 1: the show of the podcast that came on and was
Speaker 1: a guest of ours talking about the coronavirus. That was
Speaker 1: one nice thing that the other yeah, there are except well,
Speaker 1: I had a lawyer call up during the trial and
Speaker 1: tribut lations of Bob Kraft and when he was getting
Speaker 1: the tug of the rubbing tug or the tug and
Speaker 1: rub there in Florida, and I had this old guy
Speaker 1: who he checked you, talking about boxes. He was an
Speaker 1: old guy, he was resume guy, he was all of that.
Speaker 1: And he called up and said, Hey, I am I'm
Speaker 1: a lawyer. I'm not an active lawyer anymore. I'm retired.
Speaker 1: But Robert Kraft is going to get out of this.
Speaker 1: And I said, what are you? What are you? What
Speaker 1: are you talking about here? And he brought up this
Speaker 1: random legal statute that goes back many many years. It's uh,
Speaker 1: what was it? I gotta look it up here. Um,
Speaker 1: it was the fruit of the poisonous tree, I believe
Speaker 1: is what it's called. I think that's right. And uh,
Speaker 1: and it was. It was amazing because it was like
Speaker 1: explaining word for word how Robert Kraft was gonna get
Speaker 1: out of this. And I and no one else had
Speaker 1: brought this up, no one else else had brought this
Speaker 1: kind of thing up. And was, uh, No, I think
Speaker 1: it's across the board. Though I don't think it's just
Speaker 1: I don't think it's just in Florida. Um, and I'm
Speaker 1: trying to think. I don't I'm trying to think of
Speaker 1: the term here. I'm looking through some stuff. I'm trying
Speaker 1: to find it. But it was the uh. It was
Speaker 1: pretty crazy because yeah, I hear it is the uh yeah,
Speaker 1: it is the fruit of the poisonous tree. And this
Speaker 1: is from a lawyer in Florida, like a retired lawyer
Speaker 1: that called up and was the hey look at me,
Speaker 1: I look at my resume guy, and it stated if
Speaker 1: the tree is tainted, then anything gained from it is
Speaker 1: tainted as well. And then we're talking about the video
Speaker 1: evidence of Robert Kraft in the act and also some
Speaker 1: of the when he got pulled over by the police officer. Uh.
Speaker 1: And that was not a legal situation. So anyway that
Speaker 1: turned out to be legit and and well it's still
Speaker 1: going through the legal process, but Robert Craft has a
Speaker 1: very good chance of winning because of the fruit of
Speaker 1: the poisonous tree, which some random lawyer we just happen
Speaker 1: to be listening. Uh. And he couldn't sleep four in
Speaker 1: the morning in Florida and he called up and told
Speaker 1: us about it. So that was pretty cool. All right,
Speaker 1: what else do we have we have the don't understand
Speaker 1: the way the call in talk radio delay works. This
Speaker 1: is always a big one here. Uh this this is
Speaker 1: like an homage to Joe and san Antonio who's always
Speaker 1: in over his head. So Guesscott, now you know live radio.
Speaker 1: You plausibly do live radio. But the delay system has
Speaker 1: been in place since, believe it or not, nineteen fifty two.
Speaker 1: Did you know that? No, I didn't know you were
Speaker 1: around that long, but that's pretty fast in and L.
Speaker 1: I didn't know you're that old, but that's it's finally
Speaker 1: you got jokes. You got jokes. Bu K A P.
Speaker 1: You know what what city be? K he was in
Speaker 1: Gascon sestra radio knowledge? Did you pay attention in radio school?
Speaker 1: Probably I'll make a guess it is what would be St. Louis, Missouri.
Speaker 1: That is incorrect. W k P in Allantown, Pennsylvania, just
Speaker 1: outside Philadelphia, which at one point I don't know if
Speaker 1: it still is, but at one point that station became
Speaker 1: a Fox Sports radio affiliate, which was pretty cool. But
Speaker 1: that was the first broadcast in a five second delay.
Speaker 1: That's almost seventy years ago. So the delay in talk radio,
Speaker 1: which was actually invented the year the bar code and
Speaker 1: the hydrogen bomb were were discovered. So it's been around
Speaker 1: for almost seventy years, and um, anyway, it was it
Speaker 1: was pretty cool because that station carried the show. But
Speaker 1: the point of this is that we get the type
Speaker 1: of caller that calls into the show and does not
Speaker 1: understand that there's a delay and they have their radio
Speaker 1: turned up hollering. James does this a lot. Several of
Speaker 1: the callers will call up and and so then it
Speaker 1: creates this very weird again back and forth. We talked
Speaker 1: about it. You know, the the interrupting guy that interrupts
Speaker 1: all the time. Well, that's kind of a relatable situation
Speaker 1: to the person that doesn't understand how the delay works
Speaker 1: calling radio shows, because it creates this awkward situation. And
Speaker 1: so so that's the that's the deal on that. So
Speaker 1: you got that. I'm trying to what are some of
Speaker 1: the other types of callers here gascon that I did
Speaker 1: not mention in this ven diagram edition of The Fifth
Speaker 1: Hour with Ben Maller. Fox Sports Radio has the best
Speaker 1: sports talk lineup in the nation. Catch all of our
Speaker 1: shows at Fox Sports Radio dot com and within the
Speaker 1: I Heart Radio app search f s R to listen live.
Speaker 1: I'm surprised you to mention it. But there's two that
Speaker 1: come to mind. One is the drawing are intoxicated a caller, Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's that's that's a byproduct of being on overnight though.
Speaker 1: Uh well, you get a lot of listeners that can't sleep. There, insomniacts,
Speaker 1: They can't sleep, so they call in the other ones
Speaker 1: that passed out sleeper that you're You're basically their alarm clocks.
Speaker 1: So when they're passed out, you just you book them
Speaker 1: on live radio, and all of a sudden, you just
Speaker 1: let them snore into the phone. Yeah, my greatest We
Speaker 1: we had back to back and belly to belly snoring callers. Actually,
Speaker 1: I think at one point, well cowboy fell asleep, cowboy wins.
Speaker 1: We have this guy, this the voice guy from San Diego.
Speaker 1: This guy had big pipes, sounded like you should be
Speaker 1: a voiceover guy. And then a third call, three in
Speaker 1: a row, fell asleep that has never been duplicated, that
Speaker 1: will never be matched. That is that was virgin territory.
Speaker 1: No one, what are the odds that you will have
Speaker 1: three consecutive callers in one segment that are all sleeping.
Speaker 1: You talk about threading a needle gascon I believe. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean not an hour, but a segment that's that's
Speaker 1: comprised of what anywhere from twelve to fifty minutes. That's
Speaker 1: pretty phenomenal. Imagine how boring my monologue must have been
Speaker 1: to put everyone to sleep like that is a power,
Speaker 1: that is a superpower. To be able to do that,
Speaker 1: you must have been doing clip talk. Um. What about
Speaker 1: the ones where they just continue to swear no matter what.
Speaker 1: They don't understand that they can't cut on live radio.
Speaker 1: Uh yeah, well yeah, that that's related to the drunk.
Speaker 1: That's related to the person who's all schnuckered up that
Speaker 1: calls up and you know, they turn inside out. They
Speaker 1: don't they don't realize they're on the radio. That's what
Speaker 1: That's what I like to Also, when you have guys
Speaker 1: on for a certain amount that are regulars that they
Speaker 1: think they're just you know, we're a couple of guys
Speaker 1: at a bar hanging out, which is which is really
Speaker 1: funny because that's what program directors when I first got
Speaker 1: into radio, they always want to just make it seem
Speaker 1: like it's conversational, like you're at a restaurant or a bar,
Speaker 1: you're talking to your buddies. The problem with that is,
Speaker 1: long story short, the problem with that is when you
Speaker 1: do that and guys just randomly throw a fuck in
Speaker 1: there or ship um, which which is what guys do.
Speaker 1: That's what men do, and I'm guessing women do the
Speaker 1: same thing when they're talking to their girlfriends. But it
Speaker 1: doesn't create work when you have to dump it and
Speaker 1: then it's just yeah, so it's but it's tied with
Speaker 1: the drunk thing. Yeah, it's gotta be. I didn't. I didn't.
Speaker 1: I didn't put in I just want to. I didn't
Speaker 1: put in the handicap. I know you probably you wanted
Speaker 1: me to include the handicap because you're west of the
Speaker 1: four h five guy. But I I don't look at
Speaker 1: the handicap thing. I mean that people call up they're blind,
Speaker 1: whatever they got. I got guys that are in hospitals
Speaker 1: and listen to the show and all that and whatever
Speaker 1: can cheer them up.