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Speaker 1: Amy Robach gave birth to her youngest daughter, Analyse, on

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Speaker 1: May tenth, two thousand and six. Now this month, August

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Speaker 1: of twenty twenty four, Amy Robach is going to drive

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Speaker 1: that same baby, now eighteen years old, to the airport,

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Speaker 1: put that baby on a plane, and send that baby

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Speaker 1: off to college in Europe. And at that point, it's

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Speaker 1: likely Robock will experience what millions of parents experience every

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Speaker 1: single year, feelings of loneliness, anxiety, depression. It's something called

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Speaker 1: empty nest syndrome. Meanwhile, I'll be back at the house,

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Speaker 1: turning Analice's bedroom into a home office. And with that,

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Speaker 1: welcome everybody to this episode of Amy and Tza. You

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Speaker 1: knew I wasn't going to come on. That's not how

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Speaker 1: I was supposed to go. No, no, no, no. Now

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Speaker 1: this is fun, This is renewal, this is exciting. Everybody's

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Speaker 1: getting a new chapter. But tell me this, babe, when

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Speaker 1: was the last time you lived alone?

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Speaker 2: I only lived alone for ten months and it was

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Speaker 2: when I was twenty two years old. That is the

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Speaker 2: last time I have lived alone.

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Speaker 1: Wait, in life, your entire life only lived by yourself.

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Speaker 2: At twenty, when I went to my first job at

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Speaker 2: WCBD TV two Action News. I moved into my sad

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Speaker 2: little apartment on Palmetto Boulevard, and I had ten months

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Speaker 2: until Analisa's dad moved in while we were engaged before

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Speaker 2: we got married.

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Speaker 1: Wow, ten months to think. Okay, so let's let's talk

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Speaker 1: to everybody about what we're talking about here. That Yes,

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Speaker 1: your daughter, who is sitting in studio with us now

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Speaker 1: and Alicia, baby eighteen, is about to go to college

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Speaker 1: and it's a very texciting time for her, but for

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Speaker 1: you and a bunch of other parents, this is a

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Speaker 1: very difficult time of transition. And even though empty nest

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Speaker 1: syndrome we were saying is not a clinical diagnosed.

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Speaker 2: It's not a medical diet, yes, but.

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Speaker 1: It's a real thing, a phenomenon.

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Speaker 2: We should call it, yes, And I think I have

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Speaker 2: been scared about it for the last year. Yeah, I've

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Speaker 2: been nervous, like letting go.

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Speaker 1: What are you nervous about? I'm asking that genuinely.

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Speaker 2: And they do say that women are disproportionately affected than men,

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Speaker 2: But I think.

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Speaker 1: They say we're not emotionally prepared. We're just we're not

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Speaker 1: emotionally mature enough to handle it.

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Speaker 3: I think, especially with the trajectory of my life. And

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Speaker 3: the one thing that's stayed the same, the one thing

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Speaker 3: that's never wavered, is my relationship with my children.

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Speaker 4: Like I have never.

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Speaker 3: All the ins and outs and ups and downs with life,

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Speaker 3: that love was the one constant in my life that

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Speaker 3: never changed.

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Speaker 2: And so it's not going to change. But the location,

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Speaker 2: the logistics, that is what's going to change. And that

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Speaker 2: is hard to let go of.

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Speaker 3: Because your purpose, of course is to live a full

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Speaker 3: and exciting life.

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Speaker 2: But a big part of that purpose.

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Speaker 3: When you're a mom is making sure your kids are

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Speaker 3: okay and making sure they have what they need and

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Speaker 3: that they you know, when you have to let them just.

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Speaker 2: Go off in the world. You have to let go.

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Speaker 2: And that's hard.

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Speaker 3: And I'll be fine and I'll get there, but I

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Speaker 3: have been I have not been looking forward to this.

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Speaker 1: Well, if it's any relief, the statistics show you'll get

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Speaker 1: over it really soon.

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Speaker 2: Because I laugh because I was looking at that too.

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Speaker 2: They said sometimes it takes a couple of weeks. Yep,

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Speaker 2: in some cases it does take a couple months. My

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Speaker 2: mom will tell you it took her about two years.

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Speaker 2: She really has been honest about that. But hilariously.

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Speaker 3: I saw on the flip side, some parents report feeling relief.

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Speaker 2: And then guilt because they feel relieved. But there's a

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Speaker 2: whole new way of operating when you don't have to

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Speaker 2: worry or think about or just be constantly monitoring your children.

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Speaker 2: All of a sudden, you have all this time back mentally, physically, logistically,

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Speaker 2: and it can be great, but it's a big change.

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Speaker 1: You h you talked about all the sad stuff, and

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Speaker 1: then you listed all these things that sound like you're

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Speaker 1: looking forward to later.

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Speaker 4: I'm not.

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Speaker 1: I'm not.

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Speaker 2: I'm just laughing that I saw some people immediately feel really.

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Speaker 1: And others don't. But look, everybody listening here. You've if

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Speaker 1: you've listened to at least two of these previous episodes,

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Speaker 1: you've heard Analyst's name because we're constantly talking about the girls. Analyst,

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Speaker 1: Eva and Sabine there are always here and by our side.

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Speaker 1: But Analyse is actually in the studio with us, now,

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Speaker 1: only a couple of days away from getting on a

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Speaker 1: plane and starting her college journey. Can I ask, before

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Speaker 1: we're getting into anything, Analyse, I was watching as your

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Speaker 1: mom is sitting here you and I wait, I don't

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Speaker 1: want to say we're unemotional people. But Mom is sitting

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Speaker 1: here crying and we're just taking it in there it is,

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Speaker 1: that's the way to put it. But what do you

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Speaker 1: what are you thinking and feeling hearing your mom? I

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Speaker 1: mean we're ten seconds into the podcast and she's already

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Speaker 1: crying about leaving.

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Speaker 4: I mean there's been a lot of chairs already, eight months,

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Speaker 4: in the past few weeks, in the past few days.

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Speaker 4: But I mean, I'm sad, definitely, but I'm not I'm

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Speaker 4: not crying as much because I think I'll cry when

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Speaker 4: I get there. I'm excited. I don't know, but I'm

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Speaker 4: sad for you, but I think you'll have a good time.

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Speaker 2: We'll see. And I don't want to put the guilt

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Speaker 2: of that on you, because I was telling you my

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Speaker 2: mom was a wreck when I went to school, and

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Speaker 2: I remember being.

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Speaker 4: You're still going to be a wreck.

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Speaker 2: Of course I am, And I'm not hiding it very

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Speaker 2: well at all. I remember being mad at her for

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Speaker 2: not hiding it better because I didn't want to feel

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Speaker 2: guilty about leaving her, and I thought, I'm never going

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Speaker 2: to do that, And here I am doing it, and

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Speaker 2: it's not like anyone's doing it to someone. It's just

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Speaker 2: it's a sign of love and it's a part of

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Speaker 2: the process, you know, And for me, I come by

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Speaker 2: it naturally obviously, like this was my mom. My grandmother

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Speaker 2: was like this. We we love hard and it's hard

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Speaker 2: to like go unless you.

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Speaker 1: Feel any guilt. You are any way. You want to

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Speaker 1: comfort your mom out of what we've seen in over

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Speaker 1: the past couple of weeks. Do you feel that at all?

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Speaker 4: I don't feel guilty. Good, But yeah, I don't. I don't.

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Speaker 4: But because I'm excited for you. I think this is

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Speaker 4: in a chapter and I think it will be fun.

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Speaker 4: You have many things to look forward to.

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Speaker 2: That's very sweet. What are you most excited about, m.

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Speaker 4: I'd definitely say new experiences, new friends. I love all

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Speaker 4: my friends, don't get me wrong, but I think just

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Speaker 4: like new characters in my life, and especially in Boulder, hiking, skiing,

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Speaker 4: all the outdoor activities. Living in New York, you don't

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Speaker 4: really do that as much, so that will be exciting.

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Speaker 4: Classes picking my own classes is very fun. Never done that.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, you get some you get some autonomy. We were

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Speaker 2: talking we took the train up the w train up here,

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Speaker 2: and we were saying, I was saying to you, this

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Speaker 2: is going to be the like you've had a few

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Speaker 2: tastes of freedom, but you're gonna act actually have this

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Speaker 2: moment where you think, oh my god, Yeah, I can

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Speaker 2: get up when I want to, I can go to

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Speaker 2: bed when I want to, I can stay out as

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Speaker 2: late as I want. I can do and eat and

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Speaker 2: be whoever whatever I want. And that is a really

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Speaker 2: cool that moment when you're like, I am free and

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Speaker 2: you don't have a lot of responsibilities, at least financial

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Speaker 2: ones right now.

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Speaker 4: No, yeah, this is it.

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Speaker 1: You know, and we can you. I'll let you tell

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Speaker 1: everybody you're you're going to be enrolled. You are in

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Speaker 1: rolled now at University of Colorado at Boulder, but you

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Speaker 1: get to spend your first semester elsewhere. I'll let you

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Speaker 1: tell what's about to happen.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, I'm going to Spain for my first semester, which

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Speaker 4: will definitely be a culture shock for me. I've spent

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Speaker 4: some time in Europe, so hopefully it won't be too scary.

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Speaker 4: But that's yeah, that's only for September to December, so

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Speaker 4: don't be there for that long. But that will be

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Speaker 4: a fun little transition to my first semester in college

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Speaker 4: and then I go to Boulder.

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Speaker 2: And you say you were feeling a little bit of

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Speaker 2: anxiety because although it's super cool to get to go

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Speaker 2: to Seville or Sabilla, however you want to say it,

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Speaker 2: in Spain, you'll basically be going to Boulder in this

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Speaker 2: spring semester, and you were a little concerned that maybe

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Speaker 2: you'll be catching up or they'll be clicks already formed.

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Speaker 2: So there's some anxiety. Like you're always anticipating, you know,

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Speaker 2: what's going to happen next. So have you been able

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Speaker 2: to just focus on right here, right now today instead

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Speaker 2: of thinking, oh, no, what's going to happen next semester?

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Speaker 2: Don't we all do that and just psych ourselves out?

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Speaker 4: Sometimes I'm trying to focus on the present right now

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Speaker 4: and not the future because I will technically be a

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Speaker 4: transfer student even though I'm enrolled. But like people will

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Speaker 4: look at me as like, oh, she's coming and she

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Speaker 4: hated her school first semester, Like until I explain it,

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Speaker 4: I don't know. I just feel like, I mean, I

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Speaker 4: haven't really been the new kid that many times, but

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Speaker 4: I've seen all the movies, you know, all the TV shows,

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Speaker 4: and it always looks like the worst thing ever to

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Speaker 4: be the new girl. Yes, I'd rather not be that.

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Speaker 4: But my best friend is going to Boulder, so she'll

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Speaker 4: be there lay out the land for me.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, that's me. We talked about even the last podcast.

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Speaker 1: Yeah to me, why Boulder? Can you explain it?

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Speaker 2: It?

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Speaker 1: Golda became the hot school when everybody was looking why, Yeah,

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Speaker 1: it was.

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Speaker 4: It was incredibly random. I wasn't even going to apply.

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Speaker 4: I applied to like eight other schools and all of

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Speaker 4: them I mainly got into. And I was like, don't

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Speaker 4: want to go. And I got into Boulder and this

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Speaker 4: like weird program didn't even get any money. Like it was.

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Speaker 4: It was very random. Not probably the best school for

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Speaker 4: me to go to logistically, but I saw it and

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Speaker 4: I was like, I have to go. I felt a

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Speaker 4: poll and I couldn't explain it. I couldn't tell you why,

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Speaker 4: but I just knew.

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Speaker 1: And it was really nobody was a ton of your

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Speaker 1: friends and everybody seemed to think that was.

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Speaker 4: The Yeah, it never was. It never was at school,

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Speaker 4: which is so weird, Like it kind of was a

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Speaker 4: kind of a I don't know. It wasn't the most

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Speaker 4: popular school, at least in New York. I don't know,

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Speaker 4: it just happened.

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Speaker 2: And I know the skiing and the hiking, and and

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Speaker 2: your degree also plays a role in that as well.

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Speaker 2: Where you wanted to go. And then we were wondering

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Speaker 2: if the Dione Sanders effect had some sort of impact

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Speaker 2: on people thinking suddenly the Boulder was school because their

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Speaker 2: football program has been in the national Yeah, I think so.

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Speaker 2: I mean, I know you're excited about football season when

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Speaker 2: you get their next ball.

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Speaker 4: Yeah. I was planning on joining the team.

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Speaker 1: Football.

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Speaker 2: But you have our word that we will be showing

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Speaker 2: up for a football game yes or two. Why did

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Speaker 2: you want to go so far away from mom? Like,

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Speaker 2: you know, I tried so hard to get you to

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Speaker 2: stay on the East Coast. I even was trying to

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Speaker 2: pitch University of Georgia, where a family is, and you

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Speaker 2: wanted nothing to do with it. You you only applied

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Speaker 2: to one school on the East Coast.

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Speaker 1: And isay.

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Speaker 4: She was.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, she never left and she probably never will.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, well, it had nothing to do with you, obviously.

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Speaker 4: I don't know. I wanted to change. I felt like

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Speaker 4: it was just right for me. There wasn't really that

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Speaker 4: much behind it, but I was kind of like why not.

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Speaker 4: I know, I want to live in New York when

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Speaker 4: I'm older, in my twenties, so it's like, why not

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Speaker 4: change it up for four years?

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Speaker 1: But specifically you did. I'm not getting away from Mom,

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Speaker 1: but you wanted to get kind of away from New

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Speaker 1: York and the Northeast. That was a part of distance

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Speaker 1: from this place.

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Speaker 2: Oh wow, And that's bold because you want to see

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Speaker 2: something else, you want to see something new. And for

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Speaker 2: those of us who weren't raised in New York, I

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Speaker 2: always appreciate people who do have the wherewithal to experience

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Speaker 2: other parts of either this country or the world, because

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Speaker 2: New York is truly a bubble and when you meet

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Speaker 2: folks and we know a lot of them who were

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Speaker 2: born and raised here and never left, there is a mindset.

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Speaker 2: And so I do think it's cool just because we've

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Speaker 2: had the experience of seeing how other people do things,

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Speaker 2: and New York is very much different than the rest

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Speaker 2: of the country for sure. And it was interesting because

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Speaker 2: I looked it up because I just thought, Wow, I

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Speaker 2: was upset that you were going so far away. But

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Speaker 2: I'm happy that you're going to where you want to go.

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Speaker 2: But do you know that only fifteen and a half

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Speaker 2: percent a freshman at ten schools more than five hundred

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Speaker 2: miles away. So wow, lucky me, I got one and

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Speaker 2: a fifteen percent. So only fifty percent of freshmen go

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Speaker 2: five hundred miles or more away from their home. Fifty

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Speaker 2: two percent of students don't go more than one hundred

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Speaker 2: miles from home. I think I went about forty miles

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Speaker 2: from home, and that's more typical. How about you went

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Speaker 2: very far.

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Speaker 1: Across the state. I don't know the mileage, but yeah, stay.

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Speaker 2: In state state for very much. Do you think you're

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Speaker 2: going to be homesick?

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Speaker 4: I think a little bit, yes, But I also you

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Speaker 4: didn't have phones or FaceTime.

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Speaker 2: That's true.

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Speaker 4: There's a big difference as to where, like I can

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Speaker 4: see your faces, I can see our dog's face.

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Speaker 2: Who or what will you miss the most?

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Speaker 4: Oh?

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Speaker 2: I was thinking she was going to say Brody the

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Speaker 2: dog or not. Well, I mean, just be honest. You

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Speaker 2: can't say and your sister your sister too?

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Speaker 4: Yeah?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, Is there is there something about New York that

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Speaker 2: you will miss? Forget the people the most?

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Speaker 4: Mmm, I'd say walking on my own. I feel like

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Speaker 4: I'm not going to be doing a lot of that,

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Speaker 4: even in Spain. I think it's going to be like

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Speaker 4: walking in groups to classes, just because I think they're

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Speaker 4: probably pretty protective of these eighteen year olds just being

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Speaker 4: dropped off in Europe. So I think that sense of freedom.

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Speaker 2: You're going to miss your alone time. Yes, you like

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Speaker 2: alone time.

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Speaker 4: I do like alone time.

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Speaker 2: I sent TJ picture. He's like, what's analyst doing? And

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Speaker 2: I sent him a picture of your door closed? And

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Speaker 2: I said, per usual, she's in her room. I thought

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Speaker 2: you might say asuka sushi.

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Speaker 4: Oh, I do love a suka. I'm going to miss

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Speaker 4: like Chipotle, Chick fil A, Keynes, all the good ones.

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Speaker 1: How about this? What is the thing you think will

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Speaker 1: be maybe even the day. I don't know how you're

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Speaker 1: gonna set up your room and everything when you get

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Speaker 1: over there. But what's the thing you think you would

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Speaker 1: see in your room often or that will remind you

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Speaker 1: of home and make you a little sad.

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Speaker 4: Well, I'm bringing a bulletin board. I don't really have

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Speaker 4: a lot of photos printed out. The I brought really

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Speaker 4: strange photos like it's I don't even know if it's

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Speaker 4: gonna remind me of good times because I don't have

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Speaker 4: any printed.

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Speaker 2: We can stop by Dwayne Reid tomorrow and print some

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Speaker 2: photos for you.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, photoed don't They're like really random, very strange.

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Speaker 2: I gave you a photo of us to take with you.

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Speaker 4: Yes, I have that, you have the wind, you have that,

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Speaker 4: and I have a few like friendom decor that I

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Speaker 4: took off my walls to bring.

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Speaker 2: Uh so, I wait, are you gonna bring your baby blanket?

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Speaker 2: Here's a little fun fact about Anally's. She never goes

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Speaker 2: anywhere without her Gigi overnight typically. I mean, I think

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Speaker 2: you've done some sleepovers without it recently. I didn't bring it.

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Speaker 2: But what kind of shape is it in? And are

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Speaker 2: you bringing it?

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Speaker 4: It almost looks like a sleeping bag. I wonder if

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Speaker 4: people can relate to that. I used to sleep in it.

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Speaker 2: It's very small too.

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Speaker 4: It's very small, incredibly small. So I don't really bring

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Speaker 4: up that many places.

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Speaker 2: It's in her room, trust me.

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Speaker 4: Here's the funny thing.

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Speaker 2: She actually had an original, beautiful baby blanket with her

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Speaker 2: name embroidered. I think one of my friends gave it

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Speaker 2: to you from Pottery Barn Kids or something. And then

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Speaker 2: you got carsick and we had to throw the blanket

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Speaker 2: out and desperation because you were like gig you just

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Speaker 2: that's what you called it. We had to stop by

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Speaker 2: a Coles and get a random you know, just pink

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Speaker 2: and white with clouds on it, and that is still

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Speaker 2: the blanket.

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Speaker 1: You have no idea.

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Speaker 4: I think Eva made it up.

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Speaker 1: I don't know brand.

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Speaker 2: So many parents are dealing with this, and if they

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Speaker 2: haven't already, they will soon enough. This is the day

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Speaker 2: that so many of us dread. And then we don't

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Speaker 2: know what to do, because yes, we're trying to give

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Speaker 2: you your freedom and let you have your independence. But

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Speaker 2: I have some questions for you, like genuine questions about

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Speaker 2: what you want, what you need from me while you're

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Speaker 2: at school. How often should I check in with you?

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Speaker 1: Really?

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Speaker 2: I think I think parents want to know what the

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Speaker 2: right call is.

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Speaker 1: But we won't know, will we?

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Speaker 2: Like?

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Speaker 1: So she gets this, she might miss mama. We might

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Speaker 1: want to give mama some suspence.

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Speaker 2: She can always call me. My question is you can

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Speaker 2: always text me? You can always call me? You know that?

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Speaker 2: How often should I be texting you daily? Weekly?

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Speaker 4: Not daily?

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Speaker 2: Okay? Once twice a week, three times a week, week,

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Speaker 2: twice a week, okay, that's fair.

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Speaker 1: I wish you would have asked me these questions.

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Speaker 2: No, what No. The next one is how should I

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Speaker 2: check in FaceTime? Text or call? So a text? Is

359
00:16:49,640 --> 00:16:50,640
Speaker 2: it okay to FaceTime?

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Speaker 4: Yeah? Text me first?

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Speaker 2: Text you.

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Speaker 4: You never know what I'm going to be doing. There's

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Speaker 4: also a time difference.

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Speaker 2: Oh yeah, that's true.

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Speaker 1: That sounds a little ominous. You never know where I'm

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Speaker 1: going to be, Like, what the what are your plans?

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Speaker 4: Still? I don't know?

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Speaker 2: All right, Okay, twice a week and I text you first. Okay,

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Speaker 2: I can handle that, and then you can call me anytime.

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Speaker 4: Hmm.

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Speaker 2: Okay, And that's probably a general letter. I think that's

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Speaker 2: a good thing to do, Okay. And I have been

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Speaker 2: people been giving you advice, like telling you what you

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Speaker 2: can expect or what you should do, like and if so,

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Speaker 2: what's the best advice you've received?

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Speaker 4: I honestly have not. I haven't really received advice from

377
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Speaker 4: a lot of college students, more like adults. Best advice

378
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Speaker 4: I've received definitely to not overthank it too much. I

379
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Speaker 4: feel like I've I've been thinking about it a lot,

380
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Speaker 4: not in a good way. I think I just kind

381
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Speaker 4: of need to show up, see how it is and

382
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Speaker 4: figure it out. Like that's like our life motto. Ever

383
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Speaker 4: since your kids like, you'll get there, you'll figure it out,

384
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Speaker 4: And I think that's that's how I'm gonna do it.

385
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Speaker 4: It's perfect way to go.

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Speaker 1: You rob, you have any learns about her readiness, I'd

387
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Speaker 1: say that, and that a lot of parents might understand

388
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Speaker 1: this that I actually didn't. I didn't fly for the

389
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Speaker 1: first time until I was a senior in college. And

390
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Speaker 1: you have kids who have traveled all over the world

391
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Speaker 1: and buy themselves in a lot of situations. So you

392
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Speaker 1: might not have the readiness issue. But do you haven't

393
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Speaker 1: you so?

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Speaker 2: So yes, And I do think that is something to

395
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Speaker 2: point out. I kind of always made it a point

396
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Speaker 2: to I didn't spoil my kids with things. You guys

397
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Speaker 2: didn't have a lot of material things. I wasn't buying

398
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Speaker 2: you lots of clothes or any of those things. But

399
00:18:38,240 --> 00:18:41,359
Speaker 2: what I did do is I went went hard on

400
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Speaker 2: the experience and so and you all did a lot

401
00:18:43,880 --> 00:18:47,600
Speaker 2: of travel on your own. You did service trips, and

402
00:18:48,160 --> 00:18:50,360
Speaker 2: you went and without me and for weeks at a time.

403
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Speaker 2: So I do feel like you're good at that independence.

404
00:18:52,960 --> 00:18:55,520
Speaker 2: You know how to navigate an airport. You even know

405
00:18:55,560 --> 00:18:58,400
Speaker 2: how to navigate an international airport, which is cool. What

406
00:18:58,480 --> 00:19:01,439
Speaker 2: I worry about is because you've had that experience that

407
00:19:01,480 --> 00:19:03,400
Speaker 2: you think you know more than you do. And that's

408
00:19:03,440 --> 00:19:07,479
Speaker 2: always my worry, that there's this elevated sense of I

409
00:19:07,520 --> 00:19:09,480
Speaker 2: got this, I know this. Also, being a New Yorker,

410
00:19:09,560 --> 00:19:12,919
Speaker 2: you you're street savvy to an extent. However, you're in

411
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Speaker 2: a foreign country, you don't fully speak the language. You

412
00:19:17,359 --> 00:19:21,480
Speaker 2: are fairly proficient in Spanish. But it's this idea of

413
00:19:22,040 --> 00:19:25,560
Speaker 2: not knowing what you don't know, and that's what always

414
00:19:25,600 --> 00:19:26,080
Speaker 2: worries me.

415
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Speaker 4: Okay, so you're saying I can be cocky.

416
00:19:29,640 --> 00:19:32,120
Speaker 2: No, it's just no, it's no. And that may sound

417
00:19:32,160 --> 00:19:33,359
Speaker 2: like that to you. That's not what I meant.

418
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Speaker 4: I meant that, I'm sorry.

419
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Speaker 2: Well, there's there's a there's a sense and it's not

420
00:19:39,920 --> 00:19:43,040
Speaker 2: it's not anything that that you are doing wrong. It's

421
00:19:43,119 --> 00:19:46,399
Speaker 2: just that you can't know what's out there. You can't

422
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Speaker 2: know what could be out there. So my big I'm

423
00:19:48,560 --> 00:19:51,000
Speaker 2: always about I don't want you to be alone. I

424
00:19:51,080 --> 00:19:53,640
Speaker 2: always want you to have a buddy. Those are things,

425
00:19:53,680 --> 00:19:55,600
Speaker 2: those are the things I worry about your safety more

426
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Speaker 2: than that.

427
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Speaker 4: Of course, well I will have a buddy. That's why

428
00:19:57,920 --> 00:20:01,800
Speaker 4: I said I was going to miss being alone. Yeah,

429
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Speaker 4: I don't. I don't want to put myself in a

430
00:20:03,560 --> 00:20:06,920
Speaker 4: situation where I wouldn't want to be doesn't sound like fun.

431
00:20:07,160 --> 00:20:11,520
Speaker 4: So I mean, I'm going to try my best. I mean,

432
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Speaker 4: I will say, your point goes both ways, so like,

433
00:20:15,000 --> 00:20:18,680
Speaker 4: I do know what's out there, but I also could

434
00:20:18,720 --> 00:20:21,359
Speaker 4: be too smart about that, So yes, I will. I

435
00:20:21,359 --> 00:20:23,320
Speaker 4: will keep an extry out be aware.

436
00:20:23,520 --> 00:20:26,119
Speaker 1: I never got that since in all the time that

437
00:20:26,160 --> 00:20:28,400
Speaker 1: she was ever had the feeling of Oh I got

438
00:20:28,400 --> 00:20:30,399
Speaker 1: the are you just worried about it or you see something.

439
00:20:30,440 --> 00:20:32,480
Speaker 2: Oh no, I'm just worried about it. I don't You're

440
00:20:32,520 --> 00:20:36,320
Speaker 2: You're not like that. Yeah, but she is the one

441
00:20:36,320 --> 00:20:39,040
Speaker 2: that people, even her older sister would lean on for

442
00:20:39,240 --> 00:20:43,280
Speaker 2: navigation logistics, Who has the tickets? What gator are we at?

443
00:20:43,320 --> 00:20:45,639
Speaker 2: You have always been that person who has all of

444
00:20:45,680 --> 00:20:49,840
Speaker 2: that together, and that is I do know that you're

445
00:20:50,000 --> 00:20:52,639
Speaker 2: You're very good with that. So I do appreciate that,

446
00:20:53,840 --> 00:20:56,359
Speaker 2: and that'll take you a long way when yeah, people

447
00:20:56,359 --> 00:20:57,520
Speaker 2: probably will be leaning on you.

448
00:20:57,840 --> 00:21:00,440
Speaker 4: Yeah. And except for the time I lost I forgot

449
00:21:00,480 --> 00:21:03,399
Speaker 4: my passport at home and we had to drive all

450
00:21:03,400 --> 00:21:08,920
Speaker 4: the way back and I just switched our flights. Remember that, Oh.

451
00:21:08,840 --> 00:21:12,000
Speaker 2: How could I forget? Yes? And yep, and you ended

452
00:21:12,080 --> 00:21:14,040
Speaker 2: up right next to the bathrooms at the back of

453
00:21:14,080 --> 00:21:14,399
Speaker 2: the plane.

454
00:21:14,560 --> 00:21:20,720
Speaker 4: That was great. Yeah, the next day.

455
00:21:20,880 --> 00:21:22,320
Speaker 1: My tip was I don't know if y'all did it

456
00:21:22,359 --> 00:21:24,800
Speaker 1: that morning, but my tip to folks who are flying internationally.

457
00:21:24,920 --> 00:21:27,640
Speaker 1: I have literally done this the night before. I will

458
00:21:27,800 --> 00:21:31,480
Speaker 1: take my physical passport and sit it at the front

459
00:21:31,480 --> 00:21:34,720
Speaker 1: door to where you care. It's impossible to forget it.

460
00:21:35,320 --> 00:21:38,160
Speaker 1: You can do anything as long as you have your passport.

461
00:21:38,200 --> 00:21:41,080
Speaker 2: That's true, you need your passport and you need some

462
00:21:41,200 --> 00:21:49,920
Speaker 2: form of financial support. But I know that this has

463
00:21:49,960 --> 00:21:52,520
Speaker 2: been a really tough two years and you have come

464
00:21:52,560 --> 00:21:54,680
Speaker 2: a long way, and I've been so proud of you

465
00:21:54,840 --> 00:21:57,600
Speaker 2: and impressed by you and how you've handled all. You

466
00:21:57,600 --> 00:21:59,800
Speaker 2: have been by my side through the whole thing. Was

467
00:21:59,880 --> 00:22:02,720
Speaker 2: you see with me the last two years going through

468
00:22:02,800 --> 00:22:04,359
Speaker 2: a lot of this together. Ava was with us too,

469
00:22:04,440 --> 00:22:06,280
Speaker 2: but she was in her own place in MoU so

470
00:22:06,320 --> 00:22:07,919
Speaker 2: it was a little bit of a distance from some

471
00:22:08,040 --> 00:22:11,720
Speaker 2: of what we went through. Are there any lessons that

472
00:22:11,960 --> 00:22:15,760
Speaker 2: you learned that you will take with you to college

473
00:22:15,920 --> 00:22:18,200
Speaker 2: what you've experienced these past two years, because it's probably

474
00:22:18,320 --> 00:22:21,840
Speaker 2: much different than most people your age.

475
00:22:21,920 --> 00:22:24,679
Speaker 4: I would definitely say not to dwell on the past.

476
00:22:25,320 --> 00:22:27,960
Speaker 4: That would be my big thing. Things happened for a

477
00:22:28,000 --> 00:22:31,520
Speaker 4: reason and might not be for a good reason, but

478
00:22:31,960 --> 00:22:34,760
Speaker 4: eventually it all works out. And I think that also

479
00:22:34,800 --> 00:22:37,199
Speaker 4: really applies to college. There's so many things that's going

480
00:22:37,280 --> 00:22:40,040
Speaker 4: to happen to me and I just kind of have

481
00:22:40,119 --> 00:22:40,680
Speaker 4: to keep going.

482
00:22:41,640 --> 00:22:44,720
Speaker 2: Yeah, you have to let go of control because you

483
00:22:44,800 --> 00:22:47,760
Speaker 2: never really had it anyway. Yeah, and then when you

484
00:22:47,840 --> 00:22:49,879
Speaker 2: learn that, you're like, Okay, now what do I do

485
00:22:50,000 --> 00:22:54,120
Speaker 2: with this? I have to I have to kind of surrender.

486
00:22:53,880 --> 00:22:55,560
Speaker 4: Right myself and keep going.

487
00:22:55,760 --> 00:23:01,120
Speaker 2: That's know who you are, and tomorrow's a new day,

488
00:23:01,359 --> 00:23:02,120
Speaker 2: exactly right.

489
00:23:02,520 --> 00:23:03,280
Speaker 4: Yeah.

490
00:23:03,400 --> 00:23:06,520
Speaker 2: I love the that's called resilience and that's and that's

491
00:23:06,640 --> 00:23:09,040
Speaker 2: I mean, those are hard lessons to learn, but they're

492
00:23:09,040 --> 00:23:12,639
Speaker 2: ones you'll never forget. Yeah, tell me about your classes. Well,

493
00:23:12,840 --> 00:23:14,200
Speaker 2: you said you got to pick your own classes. I

494
00:23:14,240 --> 00:23:15,960
Speaker 2: think I know what they are, but why don't you

495
00:23:15,960 --> 00:23:17,000
Speaker 2: tell us what the classes are?

496
00:23:17,560 --> 00:23:20,240
Speaker 4: I have an intro to psych, which I've never done.

497
00:23:20,960 --> 00:23:23,399
Speaker 4: That's not my intended major either, but I think that

498
00:23:23,440 --> 00:23:27,439
Speaker 4: would be interesting. I have a business and Entrepreneurship class,

499
00:23:27,440 --> 00:23:30,440
Speaker 4: which I want a major in marketing, so that should help.

500
00:23:31,960 --> 00:23:35,680
Speaker 4: I have a writing seminar, an intermediate Spanish one, which

501
00:23:35,720 --> 00:23:38,360
Speaker 4: is like the second best Spanish class, which I'm quite

502
00:23:38,400 --> 00:23:43,040
Speaker 4: worried about. I hope that goes well. And I have

503
00:23:44,640 --> 00:23:45,719
Speaker 4: I don't know what my last one is.

504
00:23:45,840 --> 00:23:48,720
Speaker 1: I clearly forgot the spanh you're proficient? Is it fair

505
00:23:48,720 --> 00:23:50,280
Speaker 1: to say you're proficient in Spanish?

506
00:23:50,359 --> 00:23:53,159
Speaker 4: I understand better than I can speak it?

507
00:23:53,200 --> 00:23:55,080
Speaker 1: Is there any will you have the option? I don't

508
00:23:55,080 --> 00:23:57,840
Speaker 1: think I've asked you this. Do you have the option

509
00:23:57,960 --> 00:23:59,439
Speaker 1: to extend your studies in Spain?

510
00:24:00,240 --> 00:24:05,320
Speaker 4: I could, yeah, but I don't want to ask.

511
00:24:07,000 --> 00:24:08,320
Speaker 1: What happens over there?

512
00:24:08,920 --> 00:24:11,000
Speaker 4: Yeah? What happens? It really stays over there.

513
00:24:11,040 --> 00:24:17,879
Speaker 2: Oh my goodness. And so we had we actually this

514
00:24:18,040 --> 00:24:20,760
Speaker 2: I think helped a lot. I was impressed because when

515
00:24:21,480 --> 00:24:24,320
Speaker 2: we went to college, unless you had a roommate or

516
00:24:24,359 --> 00:24:25,800
Speaker 2: someone who you were bringing with you, or you could

517
00:24:25,800 --> 00:24:27,920
Speaker 2: connect with from your high school going to college, which

518
00:24:27,960 --> 00:24:30,080
Speaker 2: is what I did, you kind of it was the

519
00:24:30,160 --> 00:24:32,040
Speaker 2: luck of the draw. Whatever roommate you got, you got.

520
00:24:32,080 --> 00:24:34,359
Speaker 2: But social media, as much as we liked bash it,

521
00:24:34,400 --> 00:24:36,760
Speaker 2: this has been really remarkable to see this process where

522
00:24:36,760 --> 00:24:39,000
Speaker 2: you get to meet all the kids and actually kind

523
00:24:39,000 --> 00:24:42,040
Speaker 2: of get to know each other online before you ever

524
00:24:42,160 --> 00:24:44,479
Speaker 2: decide who you're going to Spain with right or who

525
00:24:44,520 --> 00:24:45,159
Speaker 2: you're rooming with.

526
00:24:45,240 --> 00:24:48,000
Speaker 4: It's it's very interesting. Almost every single person I know

527
00:24:48,160 --> 00:24:50,479
Speaker 4: who are going to all different schools have this like

528
00:24:50,520 --> 00:24:54,000
Speaker 4: group chat. Somehow everyone just finds each other. I got

529
00:24:54,000 --> 00:24:56,400
Speaker 4: added to it randomly. I don't know how it was made.

530
00:24:56,720 --> 00:24:58,880
Speaker 4: I don't know how you found each other or got

531
00:24:59,000 --> 00:25:02,239
Speaker 4: their snapchats. But there's a huge group chat. And then

532
00:25:02,240 --> 00:25:04,760
Speaker 4: you go out to dinner and like everyone meets each

533
00:25:04,800 --> 00:25:08,760
Speaker 4: other and there's really random just like thirty girls in

534
00:25:08,840 --> 00:25:12,160
Speaker 4: this group. It's it's so weird. I think it's really strange.

535
00:25:12,359 --> 00:25:14,720
Speaker 4: But I will say it has been my process easier.

536
00:25:15,000 --> 00:25:16,560
Speaker 4: I have a roommate, I have a few people I

537
00:25:16,640 --> 00:25:19,240
Speaker 4: know going in. I mean I haven't I've met her twice,

538
00:25:19,280 --> 00:25:21,960
Speaker 4: but I haven't met the other people yet. So but

539
00:25:22,200 --> 00:25:25,320
Speaker 4: I will say social media is it's it's great.

540
00:25:25,400 --> 00:25:27,360
Speaker 2: That takes a lot of the stress away when you've ordered,

541
00:25:27,400 --> 00:25:27,880
Speaker 2: Like and we.

542
00:25:27,800 --> 00:25:30,359
Speaker 4: Would have stayed closer if I hadn't had that, because

543
00:25:30,359 --> 00:25:34,919
Speaker 4: I would have been nervous, worried. Really yeah, well, I.

544
00:25:34,920 --> 00:25:37,040
Speaker 2: Don't know, or you would have been sure that you

545
00:25:37,119 --> 00:25:39,800
Speaker 2: went somewhere where you knew was going, where your friend

546
00:25:39,880 --> 00:25:42,119
Speaker 2: was going. I mean, that's that's so much of it,

547
00:25:42,160 --> 00:25:44,040
Speaker 2: because it's all so new and different. So not to

548
00:25:44,080 --> 00:25:47,160
Speaker 2: have anyone you know, something that's very scary. So yeah,

549
00:25:47,160 --> 00:25:49,840
Speaker 2: we get to meet your roommate Jenna and her mom,

550
00:25:49,920 --> 00:25:52,920
Speaker 2: and that that every time you've met her twice now,

551
00:25:53,440 --> 00:25:56,000
Speaker 2: and that makes you feel a lot calmer and better. Like,

552
00:25:56,160 --> 00:25:57,720
Speaker 2: you know who I'm going with. You're actually going on

553
00:25:57,760 --> 00:26:00,720
Speaker 2: the same plane together, like plan that, and I'm not

554
00:26:00,800 --> 00:26:04,040
Speaker 2: going with you. I offered to what happened, But.

555
00:26:04,040 --> 00:26:06,800
Speaker 4: No other moms are going. I don't think anyone's family

556
00:26:06,880 --> 00:26:09,560
Speaker 4: is going. It's because it's it's such a quick semester.

557
00:26:09,640 --> 00:26:12,600
Speaker 4: It's it's only three and a half months. It's very quick.

558
00:26:12,640 --> 00:26:16,359
Speaker 4: If it was a full year, yes, but for Boulder.

559
00:26:17,440 --> 00:26:19,240
Speaker 2: For Boulder, I'll help move you in so and so

560
00:26:19,359 --> 00:26:22,560
Speaker 2: I'll go through the process again, all over.

561
00:26:22,560 --> 00:26:24,679
Speaker 4: Over again, and then next year you can do the

562
00:26:24,680 --> 00:26:25,080
Speaker 4: same thing.

563
00:26:26,000 --> 00:26:28,200
Speaker 2: Well I'll be good by then I will have gotten

564
00:26:28,280 --> 00:26:29,920
Speaker 2: used to it. But yeah, I think it'll be interesting

565
00:26:30,280 --> 00:26:32,840
Speaker 2: to kind of just say bye. And and that's a

566
00:26:32,840 --> 00:26:35,880
Speaker 2: weird thing seeing other people's parents pack up the door.

567
00:26:35,920 --> 00:26:37,840
Speaker 2: Even with Ava going to n y U, I still

568
00:26:37,960 --> 00:26:39,800
Speaker 2: drove a car over and helped her up in her

569
00:26:39,840 --> 00:26:42,120
Speaker 2: norm So to not help you set up your room

570
00:26:42,200 --> 00:26:44,000
Speaker 2: feels very very strange to me.

571
00:26:52,760 --> 00:26:55,360
Speaker 1: We gotta do this twice. Yeah, but by the time

572
00:26:55,400 --> 00:26:58,959
Speaker 1: you get over the empty nest syndrome, once she's settled

573
00:26:59,000 --> 00:27:02,200
Speaker 1: in Spain and you're good and you find your joy

574
00:27:02,280 --> 00:27:07,440
Speaker 1: and your freedom, she's gonna come back Christmas baby really tight,

575
00:27:08,280 --> 00:27:12,000
Speaker 1: and then you gotta take her back out to yeah,

576
00:27:12,240 --> 00:27:13,800
Speaker 1: and then do the whole thing again.

577
00:27:13,960 --> 00:27:14,280
Speaker 4: I do.

578
00:27:14,480 --> 00:27:15,959
Speaker 1: I all know of that.

579
00:27:15,960 --> 00:27:18,040
Speaker 2: That's tough and yeah, and I was also thinking, like

580
00:27:18,040 --> 00:27:19,440
Speaker 2: we've had to get all this stuff that you're gonna

581
00:27:19,440 --> 00:27:20,919
Speaker 2: be getting in Spain, Like what do you do? Just

582
00:27:20,960 --> 00:27:21,600
Speaker 2: like toss it.

583
00:27:21,600 --> 00:27:22,440
Speaker 4: It's a whole new thing.

584
00:27:22,720 --> 00:27:25,280
Speaker 2: I don't even know to drive it back Like great

585
00:27:25,960 --> 00:27:27,680
Speaker 2: for the next persons not have to buy all new

586
00:27:27,720 --> 00:27:30,480
Speaker 2: things to go to Boulder. But it's fine. It's a

587
00:27:30,520 --> 00:27:31,040
Speaker 2: five below.

588
00:27:31,240 --> 00:27:31,960
Speaker 4: That's a thing there.

589
00:27:32,080 --> 00:27:37,119
Speaker 3: Five below that was your favorite favorite favorite store growing up.

590
00:27:37,119 --> 00:27:39,760
Speaker 2: And I loved it too, because everything is five dollars.

591
00:27:39,960 --> 00:27:44,200
Speaker 4: I take my sisters now for their birthday Christmas. I'm like, guys,

592
00:27:44,240 --> 00:27:46,680
Speaker 4: five below trip, let's go, and they're so excited.

593
00:27:47,119 --> 00:27:49,200
Speaker 1: Who else do you have? Isn't it more than don't

594
00:27:49,240 --> 00:27:50,800
Speaker 1: you have several people you know going to Bolder?

595
00:27:50,960 --> 00:27:52,840
Speaker 4: Yeah they're not, I mean, not as close as I

596
00:27:52,880 --> 00:27:55,760
Speaker 4: am with Neve, But yeah, I do know quite a

597
00:27:55,760 --> 00:27:58,480
Speaker 4: few people. I'd say like ten, just from all parts

598
00:27:58,520 --> 00:28:01,639
Speaker 4: of life. Like those service trips. Were talking about three

599
00:28:01,640 --> 00:28:03,560
Speaker 4: of those people who I am that on one trip

600
00:28:03,640 --> 00:28:08,600
Speaker 4: in twenty twenty two are all going to Boulder. So random,

601
00:28:08,640 --> 00:28:11,000
Speaker 4: so weird, and I haven't talked to them in like

602
00:28:11,280 --> 00:28:12,880
Speaker 4: two years and they're going there.

603
00:28:13,440 --> 00:28:16,119
Speaker 2: So wow. And again the power of social media that

604
00:28:16,160 --> 00:28:18,639
Speaker 2: you could stay connected and know that you all are

605
00:28:18,680 --> 00:28:21,320
Speaker 2: going to go there. Yeah, what are you most looking

606
00:28:21,359 --> 00:28:25,920
Speaker 2: forward to? Like when you get to Boulder? Hm?

607
00:28:27,359 --> 00:28:28,240
Speaker 4: I really want to hike?

608
00:28:29,320 --> 00:28:30,280
Speaker 2: That is so funny.

609
00:28:30,359 --> 00:28:36,520
Speaker 4: Well yeah, and oh no, no, no, no skiing over hiking.

610
00:28:37,240 --> 00:28:40,400
Speaker 4: Hiking's more accessible for me. Skiing means like I have

611
00:28:40,440 --> 00:28:42,080
Speaker 4: to go and rent skis into the whole thing.

612
00:28:42,240 --> 00:28:44,360
Speaker 2: But it is funny. I mean, I will say this,

613
00:28:44,480 --> 00:28:47,040
Speaker 2: I'll brag on you a little bit because you were

614
00:28:47,160 --> 00:28:50,760
Speaker 2: just twelve years old when you summitted Killemanjarro and it

615
00:28:50,920 --> 00:28:54,080
Speaker 2: was remarkable because you were throwing up. I probably could

616
00:28:54,080 --> 00:28:56,000
Speaker 2: have gotten me. I don't know know. I was wondering

617
00:28:56,000 --> 00:28:58,280
Speaker 2: if I was the worst parent in the world or

618
00:28:58,840 --> 00:29:02,520
Speaker 2: this was a good motivating experience for you. But you

619
00:29:02,560 --> 00:29:05,240
Speaker 2: struggled and you did it anyway. And there were a

620
00:29:05,280 --> 00:29:06,840
Speaker 2: couple of times where you're like, and you've you've you

621
00:29:06,960 --> 00:29:09,640
Speaker 2: climbed Mount Baker, which is a glacier, You went up

622
00:29:09,680 --> 00:29:11,840
Speaker 2: the Roman Wall. You said you couldn't do it. The

623
00:29:11,880 --> 00:29:15,440
Speaker 2: guy who actually had summited ever said you're going up.

624
00:29:15,560 --> 00:29:19,280
Speaker 4: Oh, he dragged me basically, but but you walked.

625
00:29:19,360 --> 00:29:21,200
Speaker 2: It was your feet that got you up. And I

626
00:29:21,360 --> 00:29:24,600
Speaker 2: and I've seen you've done the You've done the Andes Mountains.

627
00:29:24,600 --> 00:29:26,560
Speaker 2: You got up to like fifteen thousand feet there. So

628
00:29:26,720 --> 00:29:29,880
Speaker 2: you and you hated it every step of the way,

629
00:29:30,040 --> 00:29:32,480
Speaker 2: and and you complained every step of the way, which

630
00:29:32,480 --> 00:29:34,880
Speaker 2: I understand. You were a kid. So it's so funny

631
00:29:34,920 --> 00:29:38,200
Speaker 2: the kid who I I did force you, I did

632
00:29:38,240 --> 00:29:41,480
Speaker 2: push you now says you like hiking. What what was

633
00:29:41,560 --> 00:29:42,280
Speaker 2: the change?

634
00:29:42,320 --> 00:29:42,400
Speaker 3: Like?

635
00:29:42,480 --> 00:29:45,640
Speaker 2: How did you go from hating it and not honestly

636
00:29:45,720 --> 00:29:48,200
Speaker 2: like hating me for it and saying, now I hate

637
00:29:48,240 --> 00:29:50,640
Speaker 2: hiking because you made me do it. What was the

638
00:29:50,720 --> 00:29:53,040
Speaker 2: change where suddenly you're like, I like this, Well, I

639
00:29:53,120 --> 00:29:53,520
Speaker 2: love it.

640
00:29:53,640 --> 00:29:56,320
Speaker 4: I think I securely liked it all along. It's just

641
00:29:56,360 --> 00:29:58,680
Speaker 4: you want to hate things that your mom makes you do.

642
00:29:59,720 --> 00:30:04,000
Speaker 4: That's that's just a guarantee. I don't know. I I

643
00:30:04,560 --> 00:30:06,920
Speaker 4: being at the top is just that's an unmatched failing.

644
00:30:07,160 --> 00:30:10,160
Speaker 4: So I kind of just relished in that. We also

645
00:30:10,200 --> 00:30:12,360
Speaker 4: haven't hiked in a while, and so I do kind

646
00:30:12,360 --> 00:30:13,840
Speaker 4: of miss it because it really did take up a

647
00:30:13,920 --> 00:30:16,400
Speaker 4: lot of our time. Like we would go upstate and

648
00:30:16,440 --> 00:30:18,479
Speaker 4: we'd hike up, or we'd go up and down our

649
00:30:18,560 --> 00:30:19,720
Speaker 4: driveway what like.

650
00:30:19,760 --> 00:30:24,600
Speaker 2: The entire day with fortys yes, and ever.

651
00:30:27,040 --> 00:30:29,840
Speaker 4: We did that every single weekend.

652
00:30:29,520 --> 00:30:31,479
Speaker 2: Because you had to train. There's no way you can

653
00:30:31,800 --> 00:30:32,160
Speaker 2: walk up.

654
00:30:32,240 --> 00:30:34,560
Speaker 4: It's weird to not have that because it was so

655
00:30:35,160 --> 00:30:36,719
Speaker 4: it was a part of your life. It really was.

656
00:30:37,280 --> 00:30:41,040
Speaker 4: So I'm excited and also Colorado, like, you can't not

657
00:30:41,240 --> 00:30:43,640
Speaker 4: like hiking in those mountains. It's so pretty.

658
00:30:43,920 --> 00:30:45,920
Speaker 1: What age were you carrying them the packs?

659
00:30:46,040 --> 00:30:50,160
Speaker 2: Oh eleven, yeah, forty pound packs because to go up

660
00:30:50,160 --> 00:30:51,920
Speaker 2: Mount Baker, to go up a glacier like that, and

661
00:30:51,960 --> 00:30:55,680
Speaker 2: we were we actually camped on the glacier. Oh yeah, yes,

662
00:30:55,800 --> 00:30:57,880
Speaker 2: and we had crampons and anyway you have to carry.

663
00:30:58,680 --> 00:31:01,600
Speaker 2: Basically you have to carry possible you have to have

664
00:31:01,600 --> 00:31:03,440
Speaker 2: a pick axe. You have your crampons, but you also

665
00:31:03,480 --> 00:31:06,880
Speaker 2: have to have clothing for any possible weather. When you're

666
00:31:06,920 --> 00:31:09,360
Speaker 2: up that high on a mountain, when you're doing serious hiking,

667
00:31:09,600 --> 00:31:11,880
Speaker 2: you have to have rain, your warmth, you have to

668
00:31:11,920 --> 00:31:13,920
Speaker 2: be able to have layers. There's just a lot of

669
00:31:13,960 --> 00:31:15,600
Speaker 2: things you have to carry, and you're own water. We

670
00:31:15,640 --> 00:31:18,160
Speaker 2: actually drank the water from the glacier. But you know,

671
00:31:18,200 --> 00:31:22,360
Speaker 2: we had to carry MREs ready to eat meals. What

672
00:31:22,400 --> 00:31:23,640
Speaker 2: did I said? I don't know if I said that

673
00:31:24,080 --> 00:31:25,880
Speaker 2: meals ready to eat? Is that what it is? Yeah,

674
00:31:26,040 --> 00:31:27,760
Speaker 2: but yeah, there's a lot of things you have to carry. Now,

675
00:31:28,080 --> 00:31:29,800
Speaker 2: we did take some things out of your pack and

676
00:31:29,800 --> 00:31:32,520
Speaker 2: put it in ours to lighten your load, which I get.

677
00:31:32,560 --> 00:31:34,640
Speaker 2: And then the nice thing is the final stretch up

678
00:31:34,640 --> 00:31:37,360
Speaker 2: that Roman wall. Our guide let you leave the pack,

679
00:31:37,360 --> 00:31:42,120
Speaker 2: which is almost never allowed. But I don't yeah, at

680
00:31:42,160 --> 00:31:43,640
Speaker 2: the very end.

681
00:31:43,960 --> 00:31:45,920
Speaker 4: Because it was really rough. It was rough.

682
00:31:46,000 --> 00:31:48,480
Speaker 2: It was tough, but like you said, if you when

683
00:31:48,480 --> 00:31:50,120
Speaker 2: you get to the top, it's an unmatched feeling and

684
00:31:50,120 --> 00:31:52,320
Speaker 2: the only reason why it's an unmatched feeling is because

685
00:31:52,360 --> 00:31:54,840
Speaker 2: it was so hard. If it was easy. I remember

686
00:31:54,840 --> 00:31:56,720
Speaker 2: I told you guys this. I don't know if you

687
00:31:56,760 --> 00:31:59,280
Speaker 2: appreciated it, but I wanted you to feel what it

688
00:31:59,320 --> 00:32:01,000
Speaker 2: was like to get to the other side of pain.

689
00:32:01,120 --> 00:32:02,720
Speaker 2: To get on the other side of pain. That was

690
00:32:02,760 --> 00:32:07,239
Speaker 2: your favorite because it's a Umanism for life. If you

691
00:32:07,280 --> 00:32:09,400
Speaker 2: get through this really tough time, you don't think you

692
00:32:09,440 --> 00:32:12,160
Speaker 2: can do it. You actually want to quit a million times.

693
00:32:12,360 --> 00:32:14,040
Speaker 2: But when you keep pushing yourself and you get to

694
00:32:14,080 --> 00:32:15,640
Speaker 2: the other side of it, you're like it was You

695
00:32:15,680 --> 00:32:17,560
Speaker 2: always end up saying it was worth it.

696
00:32:18,440 --> 00:32:19,840
Speaker 4: Yeah, it was.

697
00:32:21,320 --> 00:32:24,080
Speaker 2: And now you're going to be hiking it. I'm so

698
00:32:24,120 --> 00:32:26,600
Speaker 2: excited to hear that that that is going to be

699
00:32:26,640 --> 00:32:29,320
Speaker 2: an awesome thing to see you hiking and skiing. And

700
00:32:29,600 --> 00:32:32,640
Speaker 2: I would say, my biggest advice to you is to

701
00:32:32,720 --> 00:32:37,320
Speaker 2: go to class. Don't skip class. Go to class. That's

702
00:32:37,360 --> 00:32:41,360
Speaker 2: the plan. It would be more than a plan, it's

703
00:32:41,440 --> 00:32:41,880
Speaker 2: my life.

704
00:32:42,040 --> 00:32:43,840
Speaker 4: No I will, I promise.

705
00:32:44,720 --> 00:32:47,960
Speaker 2: That's good. And what you say, you're getting a marketing degree,

706
00:32:48,000 --> 00:32:49,880
Speaker 2: But what is it that you are hoping that you

707
00:32:49,920 --> 00:32:51,640
Speaker 2: can do with your college degree?

708
00:32:51,720 --> 00:32:57,120
Speaker 4: No idea? I got nothing honest answer that decision will

709
00:32:57,120 --> 00:32:58,160
Speaker 4: be made throughout time.

710
00:32:59,160 --> 00:32:59,920
Speaker 2: That's very fair.

711
00:33:00,080 --> 00:33:01,960
Speaker 4: I kind of want to be like Emily in Paris

712
00:33:02,720 --> 00:33:03,720
Speaker 4: if anyone's seen that.

713
00:33:03,800 --> 00:33:07,400
Speaker 2: Show one of your favorites. And how you mean you

714
00:33:07,400 --> 00:33:10,040
Speaker 2: want to live abroad and be in a marketing firm.

715
00:33:10,440 --> 00:33:12,640
Speaker 4: Yeah, it doesn't have to be abroad. Maybe there's like

716
00:33:12,720 --> 00:33:17,800
Speaker 4: offices abroad and I can travel, but yeah, something like that.

717
00:33:17,840 --> 00:33:18,440
Speaker 4: I have no idea.

718
00:33:18,600 --> 00:33:22,920
Speaker 1: You get the reference to Emilion parents reference. I'm not

719
00:33:22,960 --> 00:33:23,680
Speaker 1: alone in the room?

720
00:33:23,760 --> 00:33:25,960
Speaker 2: Okay, season four just drop? Did you finish?

721
00:33:26,840 --> 00:33:28,320
Speaker 4: It's only one part? One part?

722
00:33:28,400 --> 00:33:28,640
Speaker 1: Okay?

723
00:33:29,880 --> 00:33:33,840
Speaker 2: We were actually all at TJ's. Was that at TJ's birthday? Yeah,

724
00:33:33,840 --> 00:33:35,840
Speaker 2: the first night when Emily and Paris dropped.

725
00:33:35,880 --> 00:33:37,400
Speaker 4: Oh, and then.

726
00:33:37,320 --> 00:33:39,080
Speaker 2: I was like, I don't think we're gonna watch that

727
00:33:39,240 --> 00:33:42,040
Speaker 2: because half the room doesn't watch it, meaning TJ has

728
00:33:42,160 --> 00:33:43,640
Speaker 2: no idea what the show even is.

729
00:33:43,760 --> 00:33:47,320
Speaker 1: I said, do your thing, say you could go ahead.

730
00:33:46,760 --> 00:33:49,240
Speaker 1: I just some four seasons behind.

731
00:33:50,040 --> 00:33:53,560
Speaker 2: Apparently if you watched the first episode you'd be like, nah,

732
00:33:53,600 --> 00:33:54,640
Speaker 2: you would not like it.

733
00:33:54,880 --> 00:33:55,880
Speaker 4: Really now.

734
00:33:57,840 --> 00:34:02,480
Speaker 1: Italy thing something? And then what was the Rome and

735
00:34:02,720 --> 00:34:03,960
Speaker 1: the Under?

736
00:34:04,000 --> 00:34:05,080
Speaker 4: The Under?

737
00:34:06,400 --> 00:34:08,440
Speaker 2: When we were in Rome, we found a really cheesy

738
00:34:08,520 --> 00:34:15,200
Speaker 2: movie called Gelato that you know what. You know what

739
00:34:15,719 --> 00:34:19,000
Speaker 2: if you watched that and enjoyed it for whatever reason

740
00:34:19,040 --> 00:34:21,400
Speaker 2: you enjoyed it, then you would enjoy Emily and Pass.

741
00:34:23,200 --> 00:34:25,800
Speaker 4: I love a good cheesy movie our TV show.

742
00:34:27,280 --> 00:34:30,640
Speaker 2: Can you explain why you like rom comms to tj M?

743
00:34:32,280 --> 00:34:35,160
Speaker 4: I don't know. I just I love the false perception

744
00:34:35,239 --> 00:34:39,360
Speaker 4: of love. I think it's very unrealistic, but it's also

745
00:34:39,560 --> 00:34:40,480
Speaker 4: so fun to watch.

746
00:34:42,719 --> 00:34:45,239
Speaker 2: Do you think it gives and I'll just say, specifically

747
00:34:45,320 --> 00:34:50,920
Speaker 2: young women a false expectation. Isn't that damaging?

748
00:34:51,040 --> 00:34:53,480
Speaker 4: It's so damaging. I mean, we grew up watching them,

749
00:34:53,520 --> 00:34:57,000
Speaker 4: you love them. We were even like the Barbie movies

750
00:34:57,200 --> 00:35:00,399
Speaker 4: and and their love interests. I'm like, what's happening? It's

751
00:35:00,440 --> 00:35:03,680
Speaker 4: not real, but that's my way to escape.

752
00:35:04,680 --> 00:35:06,799
Speaker 1: I'm not convinced. I've been saying this to her a

753
00:35:06,800 --> 00:35:10,600
Speaker 1: lot recently. I'm not convinced you are her kid, because

754
00:35:10,640 --> 00:35:14,600
Speaker 1: you all are so different. Just y'all both watch rom coms,

755
00:35:14,600 --> 00:35:17,319
Speaker 1: but for different reasons. You you answered like dead pant,

756
00:35:17,400 --> 00:35:20,759
Speaker 1: Yeah it's it's it's a total load of crape, but

757
00:35:20,920 --> 00:35:22,480
Speaker 1: still it gives a false import.

758
00:35:22,560 --> 00:35:27,400
Speaker 5: You're you all are so different, I swear, And what

759
00:35:27,440 --> 00:35:29,040
Speaker 5: did I tell you when you question whether or not

760
00:35:29,080 --> 00:35:34,120
Speaker 5: Analyst was actually mine from a DNA standpoint.

761
00:35:34,120 --> 00:35:34,839
Speaker 1: Wait, I don't know.

762
00:35:34,960 --> 00:35:37,759
Speaker 2: I told you that twenty three and meters has proved that,

763
00:35:38,040 --> 00:35:39,160
Speaker 2: in fact, is my child.

764
00:35:39,440 --> 00:35:42,040
Speaker 1: Even the fact that you have to turn to a d.

765
00:35:44,200 --> 00:35:46,040
Speaker 2: Well, I just be like that was irrefutable. I mean,

766
00:35:46,080 --> 00:35:48,800
Speaker 2: if you really had questions, I can promise you. I

767
00:35:48,840 --> 00:35:50,680
Speaker 2: can assure you she is my child.

768
00:35:50,719 --> 00:35:53,880
Speaker 1: I think you and Ava are pas. They say, exactly

769
00:35:53,920 --> 00:35:54,480
Speaker 1: the same person.

770
00:35:54,480 --> 00:35:55,560
Speaker 4: They grew up on the sandpod.

771
00:35:55,680 --> 00:35:57,759
Speaker 2: But who do I get along with better on a

772
00:35:57,800 --> 00:36:01,360
Speaker 2: day to day basis you? Because when you're too much alike,

773
00:36:01,400 --> 00:36:04,120
Speaker 2: you butt heads and we compliment each other. So I

774
00:36:04,200 --> 00:36:07,120
Speaker 2: think it's it's extra sad because you've just been like

775
00:36:07,160 --> 00:36:09,759
Speaker 2: such an awesome I don't want to call you a

776
00:36:09,840 --> 00:36:11,880
Speaker 2: roommate because you're my daughter, but to live with just

777
00:36:12,080 --> 00:36:15,399
Speaker 2: just like what a unique experience. You can look at

778
00:36:15,600 --> 00:36:18,560
Speaker 2: the bad and the negative with divorce and upheople and

779
00:36:18,600 --> 00:36:20,960
Speaker 2: all of that. That's not anything I would ever suggest

780
00:36:21,040 --> 00:36:23,960
Speaker 2: or want for anyone or any family. However, we have

781
00:36:24,080 --> 00:36:26,120
Speaker 2: had the unique experience of being able to just be

782
00:36:26,200 --> 00:36:28,719
Speaker 2: the two of us, and we always had so many

783
00:36:28,760 --> 00:36:30,839
Speaker 2: people in our apartment and so many people different living

784
00:36:30,840 --> 00:36:34,080
Speaker 2: with different people living with us at different times. And

785
00:36:34,160 --> 00:36:37,480
Speaker 2: we've always had a lot of people. Even during the pandemic,

786
00:36:37,840 --> 00:36:40,480
Speaker 2: we had a commune. Basically we had friends living with us.

787
00:36:40,480 --> 00:36:42,600
Speaker 4: It was like fifteen people up there.

788
00:36:42,400 --> 00:36:44,920
Speaker 2: We did, and it was a bubble, but it was

789
00:36:45,080 --> 00:36:47,920
Speaker 2: like fifteen people and so we're used to having just

790
00:36:48,760 --> 00:36:50,719
Speaker 2: a loud crowd around.

791
00:36:50,520 --> 00:36:51,920
Speaker 4: Us, and so it was. Yeah, it was a big

792
00:36:52,000 --> 00:36:55,279
Speaker 4: change though for just us too, it was. But I

793
00:36:55,520 --> 00:36:58,680
Speaker 4: think we did got into a groove. We did.

794
00:36:59,120 --> 00:37:01,799
Speaker 2: Yeah, and we've I think we've only had like one

795
00:37:01,960 --> 00:37:06,520
Speaker 2: or two flare ups ever, like in eighteen years. And

796
00:37:06,719 --> 00:37:10,319
Speaker 2: that I'm just appreciative of your You have a very

797
00:37:10,440 --> 00:37:14,560
Speaker 2: calm and cool like you're the cool girl. Everybody wants

798
00:37:14,680 --> 00:37:16,920
Speaker 2: you to be their friend. It's like TJ's the cool guy,

799
00:37:16,960 --> 00:37:21,080
Speaker 2: everybody wants him to like them. You have that same quality. Me.

800
00:37:21,239 --> 00:37:24,160
Speaker 2: I'm like, please like me, please like me, which is annoying.

801
00:37:24,239 --> 00:37:24,719
Speaker 2: And I get that.

802
00:37:24,960 --> 00:37:27,520
Speaker 1: So we get along, but we don't get it because

803
00:37:27,520 --> 00:37:29,920
Speaker 1: we're just sitting back mind in our own business in

804
00:37:29,960 --> 00:37:31,480
Speaker 1: the corner. Yeah, why are you all trying to pull

805
00:37:31,560 --> 00:37:35,520
Speaker 1: us into this? We are absolutely and I that's the

806
00:37:35,560 --> 00:37:37,360
Speaker 1: thing about Anily. There have been times we have a

807
00:37:37,440 --> 00:37:40,239
Speaker 1: room full of people and I don't understand anything they're

808
00:37:40,280 --> 00:37:43,160
Speaker 1: talking about, and I think it's ridiculous and silly, and

809
00:37:43,280 --> 00:37:45,440
Speaker 1: everybody's into it. And then I finally cut my ales

810
00:37:45,480 --> 00:37:47,440
Speaker 1: off an Anily. She's got the same look on her

811
00:37:47,480 --> 00:37:49,440
Speaker 1: phrase as I do. I say, Okay, I found my tribe.

812
00:37:51,600 --> 00:37:55,440
Speaker 4: That shouldn't be my whole life. It's like Ava and

813
00:37:55,560 --> 00:37:59,240
Speaker 4: Mom talking and I'm like, just there, absolutely silent.

814
00:38:00,160 --> 00:38:02,239
Speaker 2: It's hard to get a word in. Edge Wise, I

815
00:38:02,320 --> 00:38:05,360
Speaker 2: will say yeah, and then add my mom, no, needn't miss.

816
00:38:05,200 --> 00:38:08,480
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, I'm we'll never speak again.

817
00:38:09,000 --> 00:38:10,920
Speaker 2: You and Pop my dad will just be like, I'll

818
00:38:10,960 --> 00:38:13,640
Speaker 2: take it in, observe, listen, and probably be the wiser

819
00:38:13,719 --> 00:38:16,000
Speaker 2: for it, because the less you talk, the more you learn.

820
00:38:24,880 --> 00:38:28,440
Speaker 1: How often did you Analyst feel like it was funny

821
00:38:28,440 --> 00:38:31,560
Speaker 1: at times but that you all were roommates, certainly more

822
00:38:31,600 --> 00:38:34,759
Speaker 1: so in recent months as you got more freedom, and yeah, graduate, yeah,

823
00:38:34,840 --> 00:38:37,000
Speaker 1: but it was It's funny that I absolutely see you

824
00:38:37,000 --> 00:38:39,360
Speaker 1: all texting or talk and say, hey, what are you

825
00:38:39,400 --> 00:38:42,319
Speaker 1: doing tonight? What are you doing? Can I have the apartment? Well,

826
00:38:42,360 --> 00:38:44,960
Speaker 1: we want the apartment? Like you do talk like we do.

827
00:38:45,840 --> 00:38:48,520
Speaker 4: Yeah, that's only been in recent months. Yes, I definitely

828
00:38:48,560 --> 00:38:52,200
Speaker 4: think in the beginning it was what was I like sixteen, Yeah,

829
00:38:52,640 --> 00:38:55,920
Speaker 4: I obviously had the trick curfew. It wasn't as much

830
00:38:55,960 --> 00:38:57,879
Speaker 4: as like, yes, I raised you like I'm going wherever

831
00:38:57,960 --> 00:38:58,200
Speaker 4: I want.

832
00:38:58,320 --> 00:39:01,080
Speaker 2: I raised you very strictly, yes, New York extity.

833
00:39:00,920 --> 00:39:03,440
Speaker 4: And that now it's I mean, what's the point I'm

834
00:39:03,480 --> 00:39:06,000
Speaker 4: living anyway, So it's kind of just I'm.

835
00:39:05,800 --> 00:39:08,919
Speaker 2: A big believer. This past year it's I've I made

836
00:39:08,920 --> 00:39:14,200
Speaker 2: a conscious effort to loosen the rope and to let

837
00:39:14,280 --> 00:39:18,160
Speaker 2: you have more freedom, just because when it happens drastically

838
00:39:18,239 --> 00:39:20,600
Speaker 2: and everyone has their own way of parenting, but when

839
00:39:20,640 --> 00:39:24,120
Speaker 2: you go from being strict and curfuse and you know,

840
00:39:24,440 --> 00:39:25,800
Speaker 2: do this, don't do this, and if you do this,

841
00:39:25,880 --> 00:39:28,040
Speaker 2: you're gonna be punished and there's gonna be consequences. I

842
00:39:28,920 --> 00:39:32,560
Speaker 2: absolutely raised you like that up until this last.

843
00:39:32,400 --> 00:39:34,520
Speaker 4: Year, and then I thought, which I think is totally fair.

844
00:39:34,760 --> 00:39:38,200
Speaker 2: I just wanted it to be a little bit more

845
00:39:38,239 --> 00:39:43,160
Speaker 2: of a transition and less of a jarring, completely opposite experience, right,

846
00:39:43,600 --> 00:39:47,040
Speaker 2: And it's been fun because A I trust you, You've

847
00:39:47,520 --> 00:39:49,799
Speaker 2: I don't I don't think you've you're not somebody who

848
00:39:49,920 --> 00:39:54,279
Speaker 2: was sneaking around or yeah, so I've just I felt

849
00:39:54,480 --> 00:39:55,440
Speaker 2: more comfortable doing that.

850
00:39:56,480 --> 00:40:00,520
Speaker 1: You come back some nights, Oh.

851
00:40:02,120 --> 00:40:03,160
Speaker 4: That was this year.

852
00:40:03,760 --> 00:40:07,040
Speaker 2: Well, the first time you had no curfew was your

853
00:40:07,080 --> 00:40:08,040
Speaker 2: prom I said.

854
00:40:08,200 --> 00:40:09,920
Speaker 4: Oh, yes, I didn't even stay at that late that night,

855
00:40:09,960 --> 00:40:10,399
Speaker 4: and you didn't.

856
00:40:10,480 --> 00:40:12,560
Speaker 2: But I told you you didn't have a curfew. You

857
00:40:12,640 --> 00:40:14,719
Speaker 2: were like home at a fairly decent hour. I was like,

858
00:40:14,760 --> 00:40:16,200
Speaker 2: that's funny. It's not how it always works.

859
00:40:16,280 --> 00:40:17,239
Speaker 4: It's hilarious.

860
00:40:18,320 --> 00:40:21,400
Speaker 2: It's more fun when you can sneeze, right. But no,

861
00:40:21,560 --> 00:40:24,160
Speaker 2: it's been it's been a really it's been a really

862
00:40:24,200 --> 00:40:28,040
Speaker 2: good year. And I've been, like I said, so impressed

863
00:40:28,120 --> 00:40:32,000
Speaker 2: with how you've handled everything. I mean, paparazzi. You you

864
00:40:32,120 --> 00:40:34,200
Speaker 2: actually even handled all that so while that that upset

865
00:40:34,280 --> 00:40:36,319
Speaker 2: me more than anything that you know, he was at

866
00:40:36,360 --> 00:40:39,080
Speaker 2: the time, you were under eighteen and your picture was

867
00:40:39,120 --> 00:40:41,920
Speaker 2: being taken without you wanting it to and and you

868
00:40:42,040 --> 00:40:45,040
Speaker 2: handled that with grace, because yeah, what.

869
00:40:45,120 --> 00:40:45,520
Speaker 4: Did you say?

870
00:40:45,560 --> 00:40:46,960
Speaker 2: One time You're like, ooh, they got me good.

871
00:40:47,360 --> 00:40:49,000
Speaker 4: Well, we were in a fight. Do you remember that?

872
00:40:49,239 --> 00:40:52,400
Speaker 4: We were bickering home from the gym. I was, I

873
00:40:52,640 --> 00:40:54,440
Speaker 4: was so mad and you were so mad at me,

874
00:40:55,000 --> 00:40:57,440
Speaker 4: and there there's a picture. I'm like, I have this

875
00:40:57,680 --> 00:41:00,279
Speaker 4: disgusted look on my face and you look like there's

876
00:41:00,320 --> 00:41:03,160
Speaker 4: steam coming out of you. And they got us right,

877
00:41:03,239 --> 00:41:03,880
Speaker 4: we were doing that.

878
00:41:04,080 --> 00:41:07,000
Speaker 2: It was just either you said something or did something

879
00:41:07,080 --> 00:41:09,600
Speaker 2: else like that is inappropriate analyst. So I was giving

880
00:41:09,640 --> 00:41:10,880
Speaker 2: you a stern talking to.

881
00:41:11,320 --> 00:41:13,520
Speaker 1: The headline to try to make.

882
00:41:13,400 --> 00:41:15,839
Speaker 4: Fun of the fact that, No, I don't think they

883
00:41:15,920 --> 00:41:19,279
Speaker 4: caught on that we were fighting, but we knew we were.

884
00:41:20,480 --> 00:41:22,640
Speaker 2: And yes, and you're like, they got me good.

885
00:41:23,239 --> 00:41:25,560
Speaker 4: They've gotten this. They've gotten me good a few times.

886
00:41:25,560 --> 00:41:27,360
Speaker 2: And then you've taken pictures and made fun of me,

887
00:41:27,520 --> 00:41:30,640
Speaker 2: like the one on the city bike. We ended up

888
00:41:30,719 --> 00:41:31,920
Speaker 2: trying to treat a lot of this to.

889
00:41:31,920 --> 00:41:35,120
Speaker 4: Make light of the situation. It's very strange, and we've tried.

890
00:41:34,960 --> 00:41:37,080
Speaker 2: To treat a lot of this with humor and humility.

891
00:41:37,160 --> 00:41:39,160
Speaker 2: And I think you know, as hard as it's been, like,

892
00:41:39,280 --> 00:41:41,839
Speaker 2: those are lessons you will take with you when things

893
00:41:41,880 --> 00:41:44,560
Speaker 2: get tough. Sometimes humor is the only thing that gets

894
00:41:44,600 --> 00:41:44,879
Speaker 2: you through.

895
00:41:45,040 --> 00:41:45,879
Speaker 4: We love dark humor.

896
00:41:46,280 --> 00:41:47,440
Speaker 2: You're great at dark himmer.

897
00:41:47,600 --> 00:41:48,560
Speaker 4: Yeah, it's my forte.

898
00:41:50,280 --> 00:41:52,640
Speaker 2: So does this one over here? Another thing you have

899
00:41:52,760 --> 00:41:56,680
Speaker 2: in common that that dark humor, that what did I say, devilish,

900
00:41:57,760 --> 00:42:02,880
Speaker 2: devilish la something like, ye, do you have the same thing.

901
00:42:02,920 --> 00:42:05,600
Speaker 4: It's my favorite thing to do. It always makes people laugh,

902
00:42:05,840 --> 00:42:08,640
Speaker 4: and I love making people laugh. That's the goal.

903
00:42:08,880 --> 00:42:10,920
Speaker 2: From the time you were a little like you were

904
00:42:10,920 --> 00:42:13,880
Speaker 2: a one year old little bobblehead, could barely walk. You

905
00:42:14,000 --> 00:42:17,120
Speaker 2: were making us laugh that but that's you have always

906
00:42:17,200 --> 00:42:19,239
Speaker 2: been the comedic relief in the family, which has been

907
00:42:19,520 --> 00:42:20,200
Speaker 2: which has been fine.

908
00:42:20,200 --> 00:42:22,720
Speaker 4: I actually just got a fortune cookie and my fortune

909
00:42:22,880 --> 00:42:26,080
Speaker 4: was like you make the room like happy with your

910
00:42:26,560 --> 00:42:27,480
Speaker 4: comedy or something.

911
00:42:28,560 --> 00:42:31,560
Speaker 2: And that has absolutely been the truth. Ava likes to

912
00:42:31,640 --> 00:42:34,239
Speaker 2: tell you all the time that you were an accident, yes,

913
00:42:34,840 --> 00:42:35,440
Speaker 2: or a mistake.

914
00:42:35,560 --> 00:42:38,520
Speaker 4: She goes, a mistake is her favorite thing.

915
00:42:38,719 --> 00:42:41,360
Speaker 2: I think it's a mistake. You weren't planned, is the point.

916
00:42:41,800 --> 00:42:44,719
Speaker 2: But it's I and I said, yeah, but she knows this,

917
00:42:45,160 --> 00:42:49,560
Speaker 2: this this is fully discussed. But I was one and done.

918
00:42:50,640 --> 00:42:52,920
Speaker 2: But you know what I said, you were like the

919
00:42:53,120 --> 00:42:59,200
Speaker 2: greatest joy that I ever ever got. That I wasn't

920
00:42:59,320 --> 00:43:01,200
Speaker 2: choosing or that I I didn't think I wanted, Like

921
00:43:01,320 --> 00:43:03,120
Speaker 2: you were something that came into my life that was

922
00:43:03,280 --> 00:43:06,040
Speaker 2: just turned into the most beautiful thing. Have you ever

923
00:43:06,120 --> 00:43:08,600
Speaker 2: had something where you didn't intend to have it or

924
00:43:08,640 --> 00:43:10,600
Speaker 2: you didn't want it necessarily and then you got it

925
00:43:10,640 --> 00:43:14,560
Speaker 2: and you're like, this is the best thing that ever happened. Yes, okay,

926
00:43:17,640 --> 00:43:22,320
Speaker 2: that's how Annie was this sweet little thing and I

927
00:43:22,360 --> 00:43:24,640
Speaker 2: called her my beanbag you and I think this is

928
00:43:24,719 --> 00:43:28,759
Speaker 2: what makes me cry, because you never wanted to leave

929
00:43:28,800 --> 00:43:31,840
Speaker 2: my side when you were little, and Aba was the opposite. Hilariously,

930
00:43:32,000 --> 00:43:34,719
Speaker 2: she was always running away and saying see you later, bye.

931
00:43:35,320 --> 00:43:38,000
Speaker 2: And and now you kind of have done a reversal,

932
00:43:38,760 --> 00:43:44,840
Speaker 2: weave my side and you're like, see I you. You

933
00:43:45,000 --> 00:43:47,680
Speaker 2: declared early on, maybe even middle school, I am not

934
00:43:47,840 --> 00:43:48,839
Speaker 2: going to college in New York.

935
00:43:49,200 --> 00:43:53,359
Speaker 4: You knew. I knew. Yeah that was not because I've

936
00:43:53,400 --> 00:43:55,719
Speaker 4: lived here. I don't know. I just I couldn't. I

937
00:43:55,760 --> 00:43:56,560
Speaker 4: couldn't keep doing it.

938
00:43:56,800 --> 00:43:56,960
Speaker 1: Well.

939
00:43:57,080 --> 00:43:59,640
Speaker 2: I love that you're sprouting your wings, and I will

940
00:43:59,680 --> 00:44:03,239
Speaker 2: be okay. I will be okay, And I never want

941
00:44:03,280 --> 00:44:06,160
Speaker 2: you to worry about that or make a decision based

942
00:44:06,200 --> 00:44:09,160
Speaker 2: on that, because I love seeing you do your thing,

943
00:44:09,320 --> 00:44:11,480
Speaker 2: and I love that you're different than me, and I

944
00:44:11,600 --> 00:44:13,400
Speaker 2: love that you're different than your sister. I love that

945
00:44:13,480 --> 00:44:17,040
Speaker 2: you have your own way of operating and going through life.

946
00:44:17,760 --> 00:44:20,080
Speaker 2: It's fun to watch you and I can't wait to

947
00:44:20,120 --> 00:44:20,960
Speaker 2: see what you do next.

948
00:44:21,600 --> 00:44:21,840
Speaker 4: Thank you.

949
00:44:22,160 --> 00:44:23,960
Speaker 1: Is there anything rooms you're looking forward to?

950
00:44:24,760 --> 00:44:24,800
Speaker 3: Like?

951
00:44:24,960 --> 00:44:26,920
Speaker 1: Is there anything? Not as a joke here, but a

952
00:44:27,000 --> 00:44:29,920
Speaker 1: lot of parents who do their kids. There was even

953
00:44:29,960 --> 00:44:32,640
Speaker 1: this thing? Was it emptiness? Divorce? Right? Once you have

954
00:44:32,800 --> 00:44:35,399
Speaker 1: time to now focus on each other, you realize, oh,

955
00:44:35,640 --> 00:44:37,960
Speaker 1: we don't like each other. Yep, there's a thing, But

956
00:44:38,160 --> 00:44:42,239
Speaker 1: a lot of folks start to re discover themselves and

957
00:44:42,239 --> 00:44:45,160
Speaker 1: start doing. But is there anything you are looking forward

958
00:44:45,200 --> 00:44:45,680
Speaker 1: to possible?

959
00:44:45,680 --> 00:44:48,000
Speaker 2: Well? There? The thing is, there's been so much change,

960
00:44:48,280 --> 00:44:51,160
Speaker 2: and my focus and your focus has been on making

961
00:44:51,200 --> 00:44:54,000
Speaker 2: sure our kids are okay. Now that I've got the

962
00:44:54,080 --> 00:44:58,200
Speaker 2: two girls like out in the world living their lives,

963
00:44:58,800 --> 00:45:01,200
Speaker 2: and I don't know how much much you know, I've

964
00:45:01,760 --> 00:45:05,600
Speaker 2: focused on me or on me and on us. Of

965
00:45:05,680 --> 00:45:07,560
Speaker 2: course there's been an element to that, but it's always

966
00:45:07,600 --> 00:45:13,040
Speaker 2: been in the background of them. And so they say

967
00:45:13,160 --> 00:45:15,080
Speaker 2: to your point that either a lot of times what

968
00:45:15,160 --> 00:45:17,879
Speaker 2: happens in a marriage or any relationship is either when

969
00:45:17,920 --> 00:45:20,520
Speaker 2: you have that now quality time where you're not distracted

970
00:45:20,880 --> 00:45:24,640
Speaker 2: with kids, you either find this new bond and you

971
00:45:24,719 --> 00:45:26,680
Speaker 2: grow closer and you have this like I think that

972
00:45:26,760 --> 00:45:30,600
Speaker 2: happened for my parents big time, like significantly, which was

973
00:45:30,680 --> 00:45:34,759
Speaker 2: cool to see. But or you realize that you don't

974
00:45:34,800 --> 00:45:36,920
Speaker 2: need to be together and you need to find something

975
00:45:36,960 --> 00:45:39,759
Speaker 2: else or someone else, So it's a time to really

976
00:45:39,840 --> 00:45:40,920
Speaker 2: re evaluate everything.

977
00:45:41,040 --> 00:45:44,880
Speaker 1: So, wow, this is gonna be the no.

978
00:45:45,280 --> 00:45:46,960
Speaker 2: But you know, you know what's interesting too, is like

979
00:45:47,120 --> 00:45:49,840
Speaker 2: getting in a relationship later in life when you already

980
00:45:49,880 --> 00:45:52,560
Speaker 2: have kids. You never got that honeymoon period where you

981
00:45:52,800 --> 00:45:54,160
Speaker 2: just got to be the two of you, right, And

982
00:45:54,239 --> 00:45:58,040
Speaker 2: I know we have Sabine, but the thing is you

983
00:45:58,520 --> 00:46:01,919
Speaker 2: are always focused the kids. You're always a major part

984
00:46:02,040 --> 00:46:04,920
Speaker 2: of any relationship you have. So this will be kind

985
00:46:04,960 --> 00:46:08,800
Speaker 2: of the first time where I can focus lucky you

986
00:46:10,280 --> 00:46:13,360
Speaker 2: on you and us in a way that how's that

987
00:46:13,360 --> 00:46:13,640
Speaker 2: going to go?

988
00:46:14,120 --> 00:46:15,879
Speaker 4: I haven't been able to do before, Scared.

989
00:46:17,920 --> 00:46:18,600
Speaker 2: It'll be too much.

990
00:46:18,680 --> 00:46:20,680
Speaker 1: Well, it's true. Every single morning, I think you know this,

991
00:46:20,800 --> 00:46:24,400
Speaker 1: at least we our day is structured. We can't do

992
00:46:24,520 --> 00:46:27,440
Speaker 1: anything until we hear from you and Toby about what

993
00:46:27,600 --> 00:46:30,239
Speaker 1: the day and then we fill it in around you guys.

994
00:46:30,320 --> 00:46:33,919
Speaker 1: So to think now we only have the being schedule, yeah,

995
00:46:34,360 --> 00:46:37,120
Speaker 1: right to consider and we usually can't fill out our

996
00:46:37,160 --> 00:46:39,759
Speaker 1: schedule at least until later because.

997
00:46:40,040 --> 00:46:42,319
Speaker 4: I never wake up my mind, and you don't wake

998
00:46:42,400 --> 00:46:43,120
Speaker 4: up till eleven.

999
00:46:43,480 --> 00:46:47,000
Speaker 1: Yes, you don't wake up until eleven o'clock.

1000
00:46:47,280 --> 00:46:49,320
Speaker 4: No, I wake up that like ted, That is a

1001
00:46:49,480 --> 00:46:51,560
Speaker 4: normal time to wake up. But you guys are just crazy.

1002
00:46:51,680 --> 00:46:53,840
Speaker 1: But you don't come out and say hello until eleven.

1003
00:46:54,120 --> 00:46:57,040
Speaker 4: Yeah, I have to I have to process be waking up.

1004
00:46:57,560 --> 00:46:59,960
Speaker 2: That is where different significant.

1005
00:47:01,120 --> 00:47:03,880
Speaker 4: Maybe when I'm older, I could see myself being an earlier.

1006
00:47:04,040 --> 00:47:06,640
Speaker 2: But you know, but how how much have I annoyed

1007
00:47:06,680 --> 00:47:09,200
Speaker 2: you in the last and a half every day asking

1008
00:47:09,239 --> 00:47:10,080
Speaker 2: you what are you doing?

1009
00:47:11,880 --> 00:47:14,200
Speaker 4: And you're like, You've never acted like this. You've never

1010
00:47:14,360 --> 00:47:16,719
Speaker 4: like said that before, because there's always like, oh, you

1011
00:47:16,800 --> 00:47:18,520
Speaker 4: went to work, I went to school. We kind of

1012
00:47:18,600 --> 00:47:19,719
Speaker 4: like met at home, you know.

1013
00:47:19,920 --> 00:47:22,160
Speaker 2: But now I have a lot more time, and I'm

1014
00:47:22,280 --> 00:47:24,160
Speaker 2: trying to incorporate you, and I know you're leaving soon,

1015
00:47:24,239 --> 00:47:26,080
Speaker 2: so I was trying to incorporate you in as much

1016
00:47:26,120 --> 00:47:28,640
Speaker 2: as possible and you were like, now you're suffocating.

1017
00:47:28,719 --> 00:47:30,880
Speaker 4: Yeah, I'm like, mom, I've never had someone care this

1018
00:47:31,120 --> 00:47:32,280
Speaker 4: much about my schedule.

1019
00:47:33,800 --> 00:47:36,080
Speaker 2: Can you please go back to what you used to

1020
00:47:36,120 --> 00:47:37,719
Speaker 2: do in the morning and I didn't have to see you.

1021
00:47:37,920 --> 00:47:40,400
Speaker 1: I could go to work many times that I say, heye,

1022
00:47:40,560 --> 00:47:43,320
Speaker 1: just give her a beat. Don't worry about it because

1023
00:47:43,360 --> 00:47:46,239
Speaker 1: she's stressing you out about your schedule, because she's trying

1024
00:47:46,280 --> 00:47:47,920
Speaker 1: to make some plan. Think I don't know.

1025
00:47:48,200 --> 00:47:50,200
Speaker 4: I let it go. Thank you.

1026
00:47:50,680 --> 00:47:52,960
Speaker 1: What are we going to do now? There's no wow.

1027
00:47:54,840 --> 00:48:00,239
Speaker 4: I there will be a.

1028
00:48:00,239 --> 00:48:05,560
Speaker 2: Transition, and I think we will all find some freedom

1029
00:48:05,719 --> 00:48:09,360
Speaker 2: that we didn't have before, and we can still have

1030
00:48:09,680 --> 00:48:12,239
Speaker 2: a beautiful, loving relationship. But it's just gonna it's gonna

1031
00:48:12,520 --> 00:48:15,200
Speaker 2: change a little bit, and it's been changing this past year. Yeah,

1032
00:48:15,480 --> 00:48:17,600
Speaker 2: you shift. I'll always be your mom, but I get

1033
00:48:17,640 --> 00:48:19,080
Speaker 2: to be a little bit more of your friend now,

1034
00:48:19,760 --> 00:48:22,239
Speaker 2: and that's kind of fun. I can I can take

1035
00:48:22,320 --> 00:48:25,520
Speaker 2: my hands off the wheel a little bit, and I

1036
00:48:25,880 --> 00:48:28,000
Speaker 2: you know, little kids, little problems, big kids, big problems.

1037
00:48:28,000 --> 00:48:30,680
Speaker 2: I always wanted to do the hard work early, not

1038
00:48:30,840 --> 00:48:32,440
Speaker 2: that you weren't going to make mistakes. I hope you

1039
00:48:32,520 --> 00:48:34,440
Speaker 2: make plenty of them. I just hope you make them safely,

1040
00:48:35,000 --> 00:48:37,759
Speaker 2: but that's how you learn. But I do feel like

1041
00:48:38,840 --> 00:48:41,680
Speaker 2: it's nice to know that I put in the work early,

1042
00:48:42,160 --> 00:48:44,640
Speaker 2: and now you get to lead the way and make

1043
00:48:44,680 --> 00:48:46,320
Speaker 2: your own path. And I feel good about it.

1044
00:48:46,760 --> 00:48:48,640
Speaker 4: I feel good about it, definitely.

1045
00:48:49,120 --> 00:48:51,839
Speaker 2: Well, I can't wait. I can't wait to watch you fly.

1046
00:48:52,040 --> 00:48:52,319
Speaker 4: Oh wait.

1047
00:48:52,360 --> 00:48:54,120
Speaker 2: I had these cute little quotes I wanted to leave

1048
00:48:54,160 --> 00:48:57,760
Speaker 2: anyone who's going through this. Sometimes I like quotes, tej.

1049
00:48:57,680 --> 00:49:00,800
Speaker 1: You like quotes. I was bracing for it.

1050
00:49:01,239 --> 00:49:01,680
Speaker 4: I oh no.

1051
00:49:01,800 --> 00:49:03,520
Speaker 2: So these were the two quotes I really liked, and

1052
00:49:03,560 --> 00:49:05,600
Speaker 2: I wanted to share these with any other parent out

1053
00:49:05,640 --> 00:49:09,440
Speaker 2: there who's going through this. These these made me. The

1054
00:49:09,480 --> 00:49:13,120
Speaker 2: first one's from the Dali Lama give the ones you love,

1055
00:49:13,520 --> 00:49:17,439
Speaker 2: wings to fly, roots to come back, and reasons to stay.

1056
00:49:18,280 --> 00:49:19,560
Speaker 2: I thought that was very sweet.

1057
00:49:20,040 --> 00:49:20,320
Speaker 4: Preach.

1058
00:49:20,960 --> 00:49:22,880
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm gonna get that tattooed on me.

1059
00:49:24,120 --> 00:49:26,080
Speaker 2: I love that I had that impact on you or

1060
00:49:26,120 --> 00:49:32,799
Speaker 2: the doll. I would you say in your handwriting, Oh wow,

1061
00:49:32,960 --> 00:49:36,360
Speaker 2: that's not cheesy. This one, however, has some humor to it,

1062
00:49:36,480 --> 00:49:38,400
Speaker 2: and this made me laugh. And I think sometimes, as

1063
00:49:38,440 --> 00:49:40,240
Speaker 2: we talked about, that's what we need in these moments

1064
00:49:40,239 --> 00:49:43,440
Speaker 2: when we're a little sad. However painful, the process of

1065
00:49:43,600 --> 00:49:46,680
Speaker 2: leaving home for parents and for children, the really frightening

1066
00:49:46,719 --> 00:49:48,880
Speaker 2: thing for both would be the prospect of the child

1067
00:49:49,280 --> 00:49:50,080
Speaker 2: never leaving home.

1068
00:49:52,000 --> 00:49:52,719
Speaker 4: It was kind of fun.

1069
00:49:53,840 --> 00:49:57,840
Speaker 2: This is what is supposed to happen for all parties involved.

1070
00:49:58,360 --> 00:50:00,480
Speaker 2: And I remember when I first held you. You, I

1071
00:50:00,600 --> 00:50:03,560
Speaker 2: told myself, my job is to make sure this little

1072
00:50:03,600 --> 00:50:07,279
Speaker 2: girl can live on her own and be happy with

1073
00:50:07,400 --> 00:50:11,719
Speaker 2: herself and move on from you know, from being under

1074
00:50:11,840 --> 00:50:14,400
Speaker 2: my under my wing. That my job is to make

1075
00:50:14,400 --> 00:50:18,040
Speaker 2: her independent of me and to be successfully independent and happy.

1076
00:50:18,080 --> 00:50:21,600
Speaker 2: And so I remember reminding myself of that along the way,

1077
00:50:21,719 --> 00:50:24,120
Speaker 2: that that was my number one job to guide you

1078
00:50:24,520 --> 00:50:26,080
Speaker 2: to be your own person.

1079
00:50:26,719 --> 00:50:28,800
Speaker 4: Think about how annoyed you would be if I stayed

1080
00:50:28,800 --> 00:50:31,239
Speaker 4: at home entire life.

1081
00:50:34,680 --> 00:50:36,839
Speaker 1: You know, if you stayed for the next couple of years.

1082
00:50:36,880 --> 00:50:38,759
Speaker 1: I don't think she'd be upset. I think she'd be

1083
00:50:38,840 --> 00:50:40,520
Speaker 1: excited about that. I think you would.

1084
00:50:40,640 --> 00:50:44,120
Speaker 2: Yeah, well, I still have a winter break and summer break.

1085
00:50:44,520 --> 00:50:47,480
Speaker 2: Although wat she'll start becoming like an instructor and staying

1086
00:50:47,560 --> 00:50:49,640
Speaker 2: there and everything. I could see you doing all sorts

1087
00:50:49,640 --> 00:50:52,719
Speaker 2: of stuff, But it's your life to live, and I'll

1088
00:50:52,760 --> 00:50:57,280
Speaker 2: be okay, and I can't. I'll be your cheerleader, cheerleader

1089
00:50:57,360 --> 00:51:00,360
Speaker 2: back home no matter what. I love you, I love you.

1090
00:51:02,480 --> 00:51:08,440
Speaker 1: I love you guys too. All folks. We appreciate you

1091
00:51:08,480 --> 00:51:10,920
Speaker 1: all listening as always. Folks, if you're out there, if

1092
00:51:10,920 --> 00:51:12,320
Speaker 1: you're about to send your kid off, you're going to

1093
00:51:12,360 --> 00:51:17,759
Speaker 1: be okay. The three steps they say of this, what

1094
00:51:17,960 --> 00:51:22,000
Speaker 1: is it the empty nest syndrome. It's grief, relief, and

1095
00:51:22,080 --> 00:51:25,400
Speaker 1: then joy. It's coming. Everybody's going to be fine. It's

1096
00:51:25,440 --> 00:51:28,040
Speaker 1: tougher on some than others, but a lot of folks

1097
00:51:28,120 --> 00:51:29,439
Speaker 1: go through and they make it through, are just fine,

1098
00:51:29,480 --> 00:51:31,359
Speaker 1: and some come out really well on the other side.

1099
00:51:31,400 --> 00:51:34,680
Speaker 1: So es, you're going to be okay. I'll be here

1100
00:51:34,800 --> 00:51:36,600
Speaker 1: with you through this one and then the next time

1101
00:51:36,680 --> 00:51:40,120
Speaker 1: we have to do it with their in December, right oday,

1102
00:51:41,239 --> 00:51:43,600
Speaker 1: I'll be here with you. Now, let's go get that

1103
00:51:43,760 --> 00:51:45,560
Speaker 1: contractor and start working on her room.