Speaker 1: Countdown with Keith Olderman is a production of iHeartRadio.
Speaker 2: Now.
Speaker 1: The question becomes, how do we get Elon Musk and
Speaker 1: his teenage mutant Ninja Turtles arrested? The Democratic Party Rip
Speaker 1: van Winkle chairman, has awakened from its slumber and the
Speaker 1: nation with it. It has appreciated the reality of the
Speaker 1: crises of the tech pro coup and the push to
Speaker 1: privatize government and the multi trillion dollar attempted heist, and
Speaker 1: Trump's plan to invade Gaza so he can personally own it.
Speaker 1: Lawsuits are flying, impeachment symbolic but even symbolically undefeated is underway,
Speaker 1: and more on each in a moment. Trump is immune
Speaker 1: until we eventually replace this Supreme Court with something to
Speaker 1: do with the law and the constitution. However, Musk is
Speaker 1: not immune. Marco Els, the twenty five year old Musk
Speaker 1: fop allegedly rewriting code and in a position to do
Speaker 1: anything he wants your tax dollars, He's certainly not immune.
Speaker 1: The new Treasury Secretary Besant is not immune. Nicole Hollander
Speaker 1: is not immune. Akasha Baba is not immune. Luke Farretor
Speaker 1: is not immune. F Then Shao Tran is not immune.
Speaker 1: Edward Korstine is not immune. Gautier cole Killian is not immune.
Speaker 1: Gavin Kligger is not immune. And any of the officials
Speaker 1: at USAID or in the Treasury Department or anywhere else
Speaker 1: who admitted these little clowns into secure areas as has
Speaker 1: been alleged, they are not immune. In fact, they are
Speaker 1: subject to espionage charges, and they will still be subject
Speaker 1: to them four years from now. But Elon Musk is
Speaker 1: especially not immune. And what the hell is going on
Speaker 1: with him now? Anyway, his usual state semi delusional, frantic, irrational,
Speaker 1: it's given way to full fledged euphoria and delusional delusions,
Speaker 1: not of grandeur but of omnipotence. Somebody listed the names
Speaker 1: of his teenage mutant Ninja Turtles in a post on
Speaker 1: Twitter x, and Musk, acting like he was zonked out
Speaker 1: of his mind, responded, you have committed a crime, even
Speaker 1: though hours earlier he Musk amplified another post on Twitter
Speaker 1: x listing the same names. Musk has conflated a violation
Speaker 1: of Twitter doxing rules with actual violations of the law,
Speaker 1: And then it turned out that simply giving somebody's name
Speaker 1: is in fact not a violation of Twitter doxing rules.
Speaker 1: You have committed a crime. No elon check your mirror,
Speaker 1: you may have committed a crime. The lawsuits have already
Speaker 1: begun by government employee unions whose pensions, they say Musk
Speaker 1: and others have illegally put at risk by the Democrats,
Speaker 1: by ethics groups to whom Trump gave the priceless gift
Speaker 1: of declaring Musk and administration employee making Musk subject to
Speaker 1: conflict of interest laws. A federal judge in Maryland has
Speaker 1: already stopped Trump dead in his tracks on sabotaging birthright citizenships.
Speaker 1: There are six other lawsuits already in progress just on
Speaker 1: birthright citizenship. There are five over various aspects of his
Speaker 1: executive orders on immigration policy. There are thirteen about the
Speaker 1: phony buyouts and the attempts to thus dissolve the CIA, USAID,
Speaker 1: the Department of Education. There are four lawsuits about acts
Speaker 1: against transgender people. Just security dot org has a litigation
Speaker 1: tracker up go there. Odds are like one in three.
Speaker 1: While you are looking at this, it will update while
Speaker 1: you're reading it because there's been a new lawsuit and
Speaker 1: the bids to get temporary restraining orders against Musk and
Speaker 1: the other pirates in the Trump maladministration have unexpectedly been
Speaker 1: as efficient and as subtle as Trump has been. In
Speaker 1: Trump's work as a saboteur of the courts, it is
Speaker 1: the exact opposite of what Musk has been in his
Speaker 1: cyber version of Ocean's eleven meets the Nigerian Prince who
Speaker 1: only needs your bank routing number. But Trump has yet
Speaker 1: to completely destroy the justice system, and there are still
Speaker 1: enough judges to tie Musk up in local jurisdictions for
Speaker 1: the rest of his goddamned life, and especially to tie
Speaker 1: up these little shit weasels of his who will suddenly
Speaker 1: discover that their secret mainframes and social media accounts and
Speaker 1: SpaceX business cards don't mean crap, and that, as my
Speaker 1: friend William H. Macy once said in a classic pro
Speaker 1: for his show Shameless, Real Worlds out here Pal, but
Speaker 1: the goal has got to be to put Musk in prison.
Speaker 1: The side effect to Trump getting away with it for
Speaker 1: now is the residual rage for all of us, from
Speaker 1: nine year old politically aware kids to liberal Supreme Court justices,
Speaker 1: all of us who know Trump deserves to die in jail,
Speaker 1: not in the White House bathroom. We can't do anything
Speaker 1: about this for now. So who's the next best choice
Speaker 1: to absorb our legal wrath? Two hints that person will
Speaker 1: never corner any product nor industry the way he has
Speaker 1: cornered the world supplies of smug and snide, and visually
Speaker 1: he looks like a skull with some coagulated botox stretched
Speaker 1: across it. The key to getting Elon Musk arrested is publicity.
Speaker 1: What he is doing is a story, by the way,
Speaker 1: created for local television news for the older, less affluent
Speaker 1: audience of local television news. Musk's hackers allegedly go into
Speaker 1: the government, where they write, now could be stealing your
Speaker 1: Medicaid money and Social Security live at eleven. It is
Speaker 1: exactly what local television producers want. It's exactly what they
Speaker 1: dream of. Let's take you now live to Jack liveshot
Speaker 1: in Scarsdale with his concerned guest, concerned Grandma. Call your
Speaker 1: local newsroom. Once the publicity cycle begins to inflate, then
Speaker 1: we get to the local prosecutions. Because Trump has not
Speaker 1: corrupted the entirety of the legal system yet, and he's
Speaker 1: not forced out all the US attorneys, and a clever city, county,
Speaker 1: or state prosecutor could bring countless charges against Musk or
Speaker 1: his saboteurs or anybody else for everything from I don't know, theft,
Speaker 1: breaking an entering. You could do it in DC too.
Speaker 1: The Watergate burglars were not arrested by the FBI for
Speaker 1: you know, seventeen counts of trying to end democracy. They
Speaker 1: were arrested for burglary by the Washington Metropolitan Police Department.
Speaker 1: This is low hanging fruit because everybody hates Elon Musk. Everybody,
Speaker 1: especially all the little tech pros, are gonna hate Elon
Speaker 1: Musk after it turns out Musk is not omnipotent, and
Speaker 1: to do his dirty work for him ends up with
Speaker 1: you getting your ass taken to jail. First one to
Speaker 1: flip on Musk gets probation and a brand new hotmail
Speaker 1: account and an Aol installation.
Speaker 2: Disc Impeachment today, impeachment tomorrow, impeachment forever.
Speaker 1: Preach Al Green, preach, I rise to announce.
Speaker 3: That the movement to impeach the president has begun. I
Speaker 3: rise to announce that I will bring articles of impeachments
Speaker 3: against the President for destately deeds proposed and desperately deeds done.
Speaker 1: Congressman Al Green al Green of Texas. I have mentioned before,
Speaker 1: I will mention again, no, it will not pass. I
Speaker 1: know that Congressman Green knows that we all know that.
Speaker 1: But we are for the time being limited to carefully
Speaker 1: tactical actions in the courts, holds in the Senate, and
Speaker 1: impeachment bills one a week in the House. And the
Speaker 1: history of impeachment since Richard Nixon is simple and instructive.
Speaker 1: Impeachment bills pass, and impeachment bills fail, and impeachments happen,
Speaker 1: and impeachments don't happen, and no president has ever been
Speaker 1: removed from office. And it don't matter the party that
Speaker 1: merely attempts and fails to impeach, no matter, the outcome
Speaker 1: is thirteen and oh in the following how Senate and
Speaker 1: presidential elections, that includes the Republicans and all the crap
Speaker 1: from Lauren Bobert and Jamie Comer in twenty twenty three
Speaker 1: and twenty twenty four. You don't even have to get
Speaker 1: a vote on your bill. Just keep saying the word impeachment.
Speaker 1: Damn thing works. The statistic the precise number thirteen and
Speaker 1: oh is disputed. As a historian, I would note it's
Speaker 1: probably fourteen and Oh, the infeatument of Andrew Johnson worked
Speaker 1: because it was one faction of the then monopolistic Republicans
Speaker 1: defeating the other faction of the monopolistic Republicans. On the
Speaker 1: other hand, a Congressional aid of my acquaintance says it
Speaker 1: shouldn't be thirteen and ohero and fourteen and oh, it's
Speaker 1: thirteen and one because Trump was impeached as his term
Speaker 1: ended in twenty twenty one, and the Republicans won the
Speaker 1: House in twenty twenty two. I replied that the Democrats
Speaker 1: lost fewer seats in twenty twenty two, then predicted, then
Speaker 1: predicted the morning of the election. And so you say
Speaker 1: the Republicans won the House in twenty twenty two, how
Speaker 1: did that work out for them? Elsewhere? Surprisingly enough, Trump's
Speaker 1: plan to take Gaza and maybe own it himself and
Speaker 1: turn it into the Middle Eastern Riviera. The division of
Speaker 1: trump World, inc oh, and to what amounts to ethnic
Speaker 1: cleansing of the current two million Palestinians who live there,
Speaker 1: as if he were doing the world a favor, has
Speaker 1: made him an international laughing stock the way nothing else
Speaker 1: in ten years has. And this is a world, after
Speaker 1: all that laughed at him during his speech to the UN.
Speaker 1: The bar is kind of high. The man who ran
Speaker 1: on ending forever wars and who mocks Bush to this
Speaker 1: day about Iraq at every opportunity, who falsely claims he
Speaker 1: was against the Iraq invasion, is ready to send what
Speaker 1: would have to be dozens of times as many American
Speaker 1: troops as went into Iraq six hundred miles east, to
Speaker 1: forcibly remove anybody still in Gaza and send them to
Speaker 1: Egypt and Jordan, whether they like it or not, or
Speaker 1: Egypt and Jordan like it or not. Oh, by the way,
Speaker 1: there's still Hamas in Gaza, and I'm not thinking they're
Speaker 1: going to be lining up at the counter for their
Speaker 1: tickets on the Trump shuttle to Aman. And of course
Speaker 1: Trump is still sending little twits like Marco Rubio around
Speaker 1: insisting we're going to take back the Panama Canal and
Speaker 1: his son idiot Junior to take over Greenland, and all
Speaker 1: of a sudden, those million, three hundred thousand active duty
Speaker 1: American troops they're just not going to be enough, now,
Speaker 1: are they. So now Trump's backed himself into the next
Speaker 1: corner bringing back the draft. Hasn't said it yet, Wait
Speaker 1: for it. If there is one thing that will guarantee
Speaker 1: riots in the streets that, oh, by the way, the
Speaker 1: rioters will win. It's another draft. The last one was
Speaker 1: expanded for Vietnam in the sixties, at a time when
Speaker 1: the nation still largely believed its government meant well and
Speaker 1: had judgment, and when parents would actually willingly let the
Speaker 1: government take their children to send them to die meaninglessly
Speaker 1: in a conflict we could not win or even influence,
Speaker 1: when we still believed in large part that the government's
Speaker 1: judgment on such things could be trusted. And still within
Speaker 1: three years there were daily protests and draft card burnings
Speaker 1: and violent underground terrorist organizations, and enough chaos to end
Speaker 1: Lyndon Johnson's presidency and force an end to the war
Speaker 1: and the draft within the decade. If Trump, if any president,
Speaker 1: for Gaza or Greenland or Panama or whatever else he
Speaker 1: pulls out of his own ass, If Trump or any
Speaker 1: president tried a draft, except in the event of something
Speaker 1: on the scale of World War Two, in these days,
Speaker 1: when the idea of people agreeing to be forced by
Speaker 1: the government to risk their lives in an optional war
Speaker 1: is met with only rage and uncontrollable laughter. If Trump
Speaker 1: actually tried a draft, and to clean out Gaza, he'd
Speaker 1: have to have a draft. If he actually did it,
Speaker 1: I'd give his presidency it a week to ten days
Speaker 1: before he and everybody in it were forced out of office.
Speaker 1: It may not have occurred to Trump yet that to
Speaker 1: do just Gaza, maybe just Greenland, or just Panama, it
Speaker 1: would require a draft. And by the way, I'd like
Speaker 1: to take this opportunity to congratulate those who protested Israel
Speaker 1: and Biden's attempts to find a way out of the
Speaker 1: Gordian not of the Middle East by not voting for
Speaker 1: Kamala Harris, Your boy Trump is demanding all Palestinians get
Speaker 1: out of Gaza. Nice protests, it's ethnic cleansing. Wait until
Speaker 1: Trump responds to the blowback to that, domestic and international,
Speaker 1: to his insane belief that he personally can make gazillions
Speaker 1: in Gaza tourism when somebody tells him he has just
Speaker 1: damaged himself and beclowned himself and made the world wonder
Speaker 1: if it needs to try to forcibly remove him because
Speaker 1: he's crazy. His next move won't be all out Palestinians
Speaker 1: out of Gaza. It will be all Palestinians out of America.
Speaker 1: I'm not favoring that, by the way, I'm just saying
Speaker 1: that's how he will react. Good call vote against Kamala Harris.
Speaker 1: What could go wrong? Who knew this could happen? Everybody
Speaker 1: told us this, but we thought they were just who knows,
Speaker 1: you bought it, you lie in it. The irony of
Speaker 1: the first two weeks of the Trump reducs is that
Speaker 1: his minions have been studdingly successful. Illegally successful, of course,
Speaker 1: but still we don't got to show you any stinking badges.
Speaker 1: The drag on their plan for world domination is this
Speaker 1: idiot Trump and is idiot pal idiot Musk, whereas they
Speaker 1: may soon be known Thelma and Louise Tariffs Tariff's tariffs
Speaker 1: start now, let me just talk to Canada and Mexico. First,
Speaker 1: Oh okay, no tariffs end results headline in the Wall
Speaker 1: Street Journal, Trump blinks on North American tariffs. Well played, sir,
Speaker 1: all in one first sixty shots didn't count. Then there
Speaker 1: was yesterday's farce of quote banning transgendered women from competing
Speaker 1: in women's sports at the collegiate and grade school and
Speaker 1: high school level, which part of Trump's promise to return
Speaker 1: all control of education to the States. Would this be
Speaker 1: all control of education of the States except for sports.
Speaker 1: I will also remind you of two things I have
Speaker 1: mentioned before. The estimated number of women athletes at the
Speaker 1: scholastic level whose birth gender was male in this country
Speaker 1: is one hundred and five one one hundred and five.
Speaker 1: Of course, that estimate is old. It's a month ago.
Speaker 1: It was made by a group seeking to ban them,
Speaker 1: so it may now be up to one hundred and six.
Speaker 1: And I will add that nearly fifty years ago and
Speaker 1: my friend doctor Renee Richards formerly doctor Richard Raskin, reached
Speaker 1: tennis's US Open. She of course wiped out Chris Everett
Speaker 1: and Martina Navratilova and all the rest. And you'll remember
Speaker 1: she won twenty three consecutive Wimbledon's and she destroyed women's
Speaker 1: tennis for all time because of her bone structure advantage.
Speaker 1: Oh that's right. None of that happened, because this issue
Speaker 1: is trivial, because there's one hundred and six of them
Speaker 1: in the country, and it only became a cause celebra
Speaker 1: for morons and mediocrits like the swimmer Riley Gaines, who
Speaker 1: finished well behind a transgendered woman once and then devoted
Speaker 1: her life to hounding transgendered people. Congrats on the Riley
Speaker 1: Gains was a mediocre swimmer, but a worse person order.
Speaker 1: Couple of vsh media notes, as Marjorie Taylor Green, who
Speaker 1: declared yesterday that the music magazine and news outlet is
Speaker 1: called Rolling Stones, demanded NPR and PBS testify to some
Speaker 1: committee she runs or subcommittee at the doge who knows
Speaker 1: hai this is the subcommittee for morons. PBS has commissioned
Speaker 1: a poll in which seventy two percent of Trump voters
Speaker 1: said they valued PBS for its kids programming. Sixty five
Speaker 1: percent of Trump voters think PBS is either adequately funded
Speaker 1: by the government or insufficiently funded government by the government. Unbelievable.
Speaker 1: There's large group of Trump voters who believe we should
Speaker 1: be giving more taxpayer money to PBS. Government funds are
Speaker 1: only fifteen percent of the PBS budget. Anyway, have a
Speaker 1: nice time with that data, Marge. I don't know a
Speaker 1: number as big as sixty five. She may just faint.
Speaker 1: Stephen A. Smith is skating further and further onto thin ice.
Speaker 1: He says it would be a sacrifice, but he might
Speaker 1: run for the Democratic nomination in twenty twenty eight, how's
Speaker 1: your shoulder for? Did you have an injury panning yourself
Speaker 1: on the back with both arms at the same time?
Speaker 1: Surgery Polling and it's by a Trump pollster has Kamala
Speaker 1: Harris at thirty five percent right now for the twenty
Speaker 1: twenty eight nomination, and nobody else in double digits. But
Speaker 1: just for giggles, here's the rest of the list. Buddha
Speaker 1: Jedge nine, Newsom seven AOC six, Governor Shapiro three, Governor
Speaker 1: Walls three, Governor Whitmter three, Senator Klobashar three, Corey Booker two,
Speaker 1: Governor Moore two, Stephen A. Smith two, Governor Pritzker one,
Speaker 1: Beto O'Rourke one, Governor Murphy one, Governor Polis one. So
Speaker 1: Stephen trails, Tim Walls and Amy Klobashar. But he's got
Speaker 1: twice the support of Jared Polis, who's been collaborating with Republicans.
Speaker 1: Well done, Steve. The problem with Stephen A. Smith is
Speaker 1: I'm not sure if he doesn't realize that two percent
Speaker 1: is nothing, or if he was just so excited to
Speaker 1: see his name on the list that he didn't even
Speaker 1: look at the number. And we have a nearly weekly,
Speaker 1: self owned by Van Jones, now in its tenth year,
Speaker 1: Van Jones is still on CNN. Van Jones commented on
Speaker 1: Scott Jennings, the racist, misogynist CNN platforms every night in
Speaker 1: hopes of getting an audience that just will not show
Speaker 1: up for Abby Phillip Show no matter who you put
Speaker 1: on it. She is at a little better than one
Speaker 1: third the Lawrence O'Donnell audience. And I assume most of
Speaker 1: Loade's audience at this point is people who died in
Speaker 1: front of the team and left it on MSNBC. That's
Speaker 1: just my guest based on my experience with him. Anyway,
Speaker 1: Van Jones told The Wall Street Journal about mister Jennings
Speaker 1: of the Abby Phillips Show, quote, I've never fell on
Speaker 1: air that Scott was saying something he didn't believe in
Speaker 1: a way that was unnecessarily incendiary just to go viral.
Speaker 1: So so, Ben, you're saying, Scott Jennings isn't a white
Speaker 1: supremacist asshole, clickbaiting poser. He's a real white supremacist asshole.
Speaker 1: And that's better somehow. If CNN canceled its primetime lineup
Speaker 1: and went all cartoons, the quality of CNN commentary and
Speaker 1: CNN journalism would shoot through the roof. In the interim,
Speaker 1: I have this suggestion CNN should try to get Van
Speaker 1: Jones and Scott Jennings shoot through the roof. See you boys.
Speaker 1: Also of interest here, Rom Emmanuel and David Axelrod are
Speaker 1: upset at the democrats reaction to Musk canceling the US
Speaker 1: AID program. Not righteously indignant enough, not protesting enough, not
Speaker 1: acting enough. No, no, no, These two dinosaurs think Democrats
Speaker 1: should not have reacted at all. Happily, my pal Will
Speaker 1: Bunch ended Rom Emmanuel's remaining credibility with one of the
Speaker 1: greatest burns I have ever read. That's next. This is countdown.
Speaker 1: This is countdown, with Keith Elberman still ahead. I was
Speaker 1: quoted in the Washington Post the other day as saying
Speaker 1: about Rachel Matadow quote, television political commentary is better when
Speaker 1: she's on the air. My understanding is she's pissed about that.
Speaker 1: Why because there's an article about her in which I
Speaker 1: am quoted. This is not an odd phenomenon, although she
Speaker 1: has elevated it to real weirdness. Not long after I
Speaker 1: got to ESPN in nineteen ninety two, people magazine found
Speaker 1: out that I had gone to school with was a
Speaker 1: protege there of and then successor to Chris Berman, and
Speaker 1: they were doing a story on him, so they interviewed
Speaker 1: me about him, and when it came out, Chris took
Speaker 1: me into a studio and they rolled up. Copy of
Speaker 1: the magazine was in his hand, and he was angry,
Speaker 1: they've quoted you in here more than they have quoted me.
Speaker 1: What I pointed out that I'd only said nice things, Chris,
Speaker 1: and this is him in brief quickly apologized, I'm sorry
Speaker 1: a family member is upset. Anyway.
Speaker 4: What I really should have said was I'm glad somebody
Speaker 4: who knew me before I was a big deal still
Speaker 4: likes me now when I am a big deal.
Speaker 1: That is also Chris. It's way less conceited than it sounds.
Speaker 1: I could not resist the joke though, that he had
Speaker 1: just set up. I pointed at his copy of People,
Speaker 1: and I said, where in there does it say I
Speaker 1: like you? He scowled, and then said, so, if they
Speaker 1: ever do a piece on you for some reason, I'll
Speaker 1: just say you were as big a wise ass now
Speaker 1: as you were when you were thirty. I said that
Speaker 1: was fair, and that was the end of it. When
Speaker 1: they did do a story on me, they didn't even
Speaker 1: call him Mattow though didn't apologize. And a last to that,
Speaker 1: the post noted quote that I helped jumpstart Matdow's career
Speaker 1: and that of other network stars, which is the first
Speaker 1: time that reality has sneaked into print in like five years.
Speaker 1: And it's true, but it doesn't get to the gist
Speaker 1: of it, which is I fought my bosses for a year,
Speaker 1: the ones who said MSNBC viewers would never watch a
Speaker 1: woman do political news. One of those geniuses is now
Speaker 1: president of her production company. Because TV damages the brains
Speaker 1: of everybody connected to it, myself included, you have to
Speaker 1: work your way back from that kind of damage. Few do.
Speaker 1: In point of fact, I actually wound up personally stopping
Speaker 1: MSNBC from losing Madow to CNN when Larry King offered
Speaker 1: her two hundred and fifty dollars to be a guest
Speaker 1: one night. Turned out we were getting her work for
Speaker 1: first here. That's right, two hundred and fifty dollars. I
Speaker 1: stepped in, hired her myself, spent four hundred and thirty
Speaker 1: seven dollars literally out of my own wallet to keep
Speaker 1: her there and billions of dollars later. I will tell
Speaker 1: you the story in full, because I think this is
Speaker 1: the anniversary of the event. It is a story that
Speaker 1: sounds crazier and crazier every time I tell it. I
Speaker 1: will tell it in full next in Things I promised
Speaker 1: not to tell first, Believe it or not, there's still
Speaker 1: more new idiots to talk about. The daily roundup of
Speaker 1: the miss Grants, morons undone in Kruger Effects specimens who
Speaker 1: constitute today's other worst persons in the world. Today's episode
Speaker 1: is dedicated to dishonorable Mention recipient Nancy Mace, the congresswoman
Speaker 1: stood on the floor of the House yesterday and shouted repeatedly,
Speaker 1: quote tranny, tranny, tranny, which wouldn't be news. She has
Speaker 1: episodes like that also. And Mace does not have a
Speaker 1: screw loose. She has a hardware store full of screws loose.
Speaker 1: The reason this matters is that after her former communications director,
Speaker 1: Natalie Johnson wrote to Mace on social about quote your
Speaker 1: botched cheap hooker inspired boob job unquote, it is evident
Speaker 1: that the average transgendered person has had less plastic surgery
Speaker 1: than has Nancy Mace any who. Thus we proceed to
Speaker 1: the medallists the bronze worse. The NFL, the National Football
Speaker 1: League from the athletic a Super Bowl change, something that
Speaker 1: had been in place since the twenty twenty one game.
Speaker 1: By the way, can we drop the moronic Roman numerals already?
Speaker 1: This isn't ancient rome. We barely use them at all
Speaker 1: anymore except for this stupid game. And nobody knows what
Speaker 1: LX means in mathematics anymore. Anyway, l i X everybody
Speaker 1: already has a joke about what LIX could mean. Anyway.
Speaker 1: The change from the athletic NFL to remove end racism
Speaker 1: messaging in end zone ahead of Super Bowl sources, And
Speaker 1: there is a picture of a preceding Super Bowl that
Speaker 1: the chief slogo in the end zone and then above
Speaker 1: it in smaller letters right under the goalpost and racism. Hey,
Speaker 1: Roger Goodell, commissioner of the NFL, I know you're an idiot,
Speaker 1: but certainly somebody's had to you. Somebody had to have
Speaker 1: mentioned this. Hey, you know what if we suddenly become
Speaker 1: against end racism, isn't that the same as being for racism?
Speaker 1: NFL not see Football League the runner up generic Get
Speaker 1: off My Lawn, Republican octagenarian Jack Miladden, who decided to
Speaker 1: engage Justin Trudeau with one of the oldest cliches of
Speaker 1: all time on social media. It's literally at least two
Speaker 1: thousand years old, and Jack screwed it up. Trudeau wrote,
Speaker 1: the United States has confirmed that it intends to impose
Speaker 1: twenty five percent tariffs on most Canadian goods, with ten
Speaker 1: percent tariffs on energy starting February fourth. Obviously things have
Speaker 1: changed since this was written. I've met with the premieres
Speaker 1: and our cabinet today and I'll be speaking with President
Speaker 1: Scheinbaum of Mexico. Shortly we did et cetera, et cetera,
Speaker 1: and Jack Maladden, whose handle is at John Maladden, signifying
Speaker 1: a life of utter confusion on his part. Had Canada
Speaker 1: been treating us fairly, Jack added, this would never have happened,
Speaker 1: So buckle up, Canada, you're taking on Goliath. It got
Speaker 1: community noted because, of course, as the note said, Goliath
Speaker 1: died in that story. This Maladden guy, whoever it was is,
Speaker 1: was reduced to explaining that he knew all that, of course,
Speaker 1: But then clearly this time the odds were Goliath will win.
Speaker 2: Ms.
Speaker 1: Maloden is, of course mister Maladen. Whatever he is is,
Speaker 1: of course more representative of a different Biblical bit of imagery,
Speaker 1: namely the jawbone of an ass. But our winner is
Speaker 1: Rom Immanuel. Boy, oh boy, did this idiot not recognize
Speaker 1: his own sell by date? Never noticed when the sand
Speaker 1: had run out in his hour glass. His Washington post
Speaker 1: op ed was bad enough. Democrats had become the pointy
Speaker 1: of permissiveness. That's ballot box poison. This whole article, flimsy,
Speaker 1: badly written, repetitive, was an excuse to explain that only
Speaker 1: Bill Clinton's campaign in nineteen ninety two really got that
Speaker 1: balance right between big issues and kitchen table issues, and
Speaker 1: who worked on that campaign? Why it was whiny, holier
Speaker 1: than now, sound of one hand clapping, and the hand
Speaker 1: was immanuals and he was looking at a picture of
Speaker 1: himself as he did it. Rom Emmanuel, Well, that op
Speaker 1: ed was bad enough. But Emmanuel's interview with Politico, in
Speaker 1: which he insists that the Democrats are wrong to devote
Speaker 1: any time to try to stop Elon Musk savaging American
Speaker 1: foreign aid and breaking into the digital equivalent of Fort Knox,
Speaker 1: that's way worse. Rom Emmanuel is a fool. He got
Speaker 1: lucky once, like David Axelrod got lucky once. Axelrod is
Speaker 1: in the same story. He echoed to Politico, this same
Speaker 1: stick to kitchen table issues, while Trump is trying to
Speaker 1: steal everybody's kitchen table and gaza and open up. I
Speaker 1: don't know a restaurant with your kitchen table in it.
Speaker 1: Rom Emmanuel, David Axelrod, and Politico all in the same place,
Speaker 1: the all star team of conventional wisdom. As long as
Speaker 1: it's still nineteen ninety six, missing only Chuck Todd and Christial,
Speaker 1: how could it get worse? Well, I will offer for
Speaker 1: one immanual quote with this preface. I've mentioned it before.
Speaker 1: I brought up Chris Berman in high school, Will Bunch
Speaker 1: of the Philadelphia Inquirer, who used to answer to Bill Bunch,
Speaker 1: by the way, was from the day he joined our
Speaker 1: high school newspaper, which Berman had just graduated from. Bunch
Speaker 1: was our best reporter, my best reporter. I was news
Speaker 1: editor and editor in chief, and I'd been on the
Speaker 1: paper four years, and I really was a good editor.
Speaker 1: It was my calling. And then this got in the way. Anyway,
Speaker 1: Bunch was so good back then. This is fifty two
Speaker 1: years ago that I remember saying to him at the time,
Speaker 1: your article is the first one I'll do my voice
Speaker 1: from then, your article is the first one. I can't
Speaker 1: do anything too to make it better. Well, Bunch is
Speaker 1: still that good. First the Immanual quote from Politico that
Speaker 1: I referred to, then Bunch responding to it with the
Speaker 1: best burn of the year so far. Quote Manual, the
Speaker 1: former House leader, Chicago mayor, and diplomat, told me much
Speaker 1: the same quote. You don't find every fight, you don't
Speaker 1: swing at every pinch. And my view is, while I
Speaker 1: care about the USAID as a former ambassador, that's not
Speaker 1: the hill I'm going to die on, he said. Will
Speaker 1: Bunch screenshot at this and posted it with this kill
Speaker 1: shot directed at Immanuel, quoting, will please tell me the
Speaker 1: hill that you will die on, so that I can't
Speaker 1: transport you there immediately. Oh, I'll pay for the uber.
Speaker 1: Will rom your dead son, get yourself buried? Immanuel, Today's
Speaker 1: worst person than the word.
Speaker 3: Ah.
Speaker 1: The geniuses of MSNBC. So I looked up the details
Speaker 1: of this, and it looks like this is the anniversary.
Speaker 1: It's somewhere around here at the beginning of February from
Speaker 1: two thousand and eight. Late in November two thousand and seven,
Speaker 1: after several months of pressuring my MSNBC bosses to hire
Speaker 1: Rachel Maddow to try out as My guest host with
Speaker 1: a goal of then showcasing her and spinning her off
Speaker 1: into her own show, the vice president in charge of
Speaker 1: the network, Phil Griffin, agreed to give Madow a deal
Speaker 1: for forty or fifty grand as an MSNBC contributor. It
Speaker 1: would do nothing more than lock her in place so
Speaker 1: that CNN would not steal her from us. I mean,
Speaker 1: I knew that that conversation and that concession still would
Speaker 1: not get her her own show. What I did not
Speaker 1: know was the concession I was told about the contributors contract.
Speaker 1: It was a lie. And by January two thousand and eight,
Speaker 1: as the Clinton Obama primary race turned into a tong war,
Speaker 1: we were imposing upon Rachel Meadow to join the desk
Speaker 1: each Tuesday for Primary Night. She was not anchoring, she
Speaker 1: was not even the lead analyst. And my uncontrollable fire
Speaker 1: hose co host Matthews, who was consistently pretending that she
Speaker 1: did not actually exist, but she existed, she was there,
Speaker 1: and I quizzed her about every topic every chance I got.
Speaker 1: Soon I began to include her appearances in the pre
Speaker 1: recorded open that I would write two minutes of hyperbole
Speaker 1: that was really designed merely to give everybody enough time
Speaker 1: to get my fat ass into the anchor chair and
Speaker 1: everybody else's mics on with Tim Russard in the NBC
Speaker 1: News Washington Bureau, David Gregory at Clinton Headquarters, Howard Feineman
Speaker 1: and Eugene Robinson in New York, Chuck Todd at the
Speaker 1: exit poll desk, Tom broke off the perspective desk, MC
Speaker 1: Esher at the lack of Perspective Desk. Then came Super Tuesday,
Speaker 1: February fifth, two thousand and eight. I was writing this
Speaker 1: orgasmic drivel, as I always did on Tuesday, crossing the
Speaker 1: names of who was where off the list as I
Speaker 1: went the list handed to me by the executive producer, Izypovich.
Speaker 1: When I noticed the list did not include either Rachel
Speaker 1: or the Rachel Desk, I knocked on the wall that
Speaker 1: separated our little offices at thirty Rock, and she shuffled
Speaker 1: in complete with a sincere smile, friendship, but always also
Speaker 1: with what seemed to be a little space kept in
Speaker 1: reserve where she could wonder if I was mad enough
Speaker 1: to try to take somebody hostage. Yes, my third child.
Speaker 1: Where's Rachel tonight? I asked, as I waved the paper
Speaker 1: at her, assuming oversight, but leaving my own little space
Speaker 1: in reserve where my earlier nightmare had come true. Not
Speaker 1: on paper. Please to put name Rachel on paper? Is
Speaker 1: Isipovich said it matter of factly. Oh, yeah, well, oh,
Speaker 1: I was in trouble. That elongated consonant always meant trouble.
Speaker 1: She's on Larry King tonight. Momentarily, I went very stupid.
Speaker 1: How in the hell does that work when she has
Speaker 1: a contract with us? I'll tell you, but you have
Speaker 1: to promise not to hate me. The Izypovich fake cringe
Speaker 1: and crouch ensued. Phil made me promise not to tell you.
Speaker 1: Rachel doesn't have a contract with us. He told me
Speaker 1: he told you he'd get her one, then his boss
Speaker 1: refused to give him the money. I'm sorry, you promised
Speaker 1: not to hate me. Momentarily, I was calm. Momentarily, but
Speaker 1: why didn't you tell me that before? Approximately? Oh right, now,
Speaker 1: why didn't you tell me this before? She agreed to
Speaker 1: go on Larry King's show, while she only decided this morning,
Speaker 1: apparently she really needs the cash. I told Phil, and
Speaker 1: he said, those are the breaks, buddy. The last thing
Speaker 1: I actually remember doing, the last part that I did
Speaker 1: not need to recreate from the memories of others and
Speaker 1: an occasional flashback in therapy, was asking how much my
Speaker 1: old friend Larry King was going to give Rachel Is
Speaker 1: he pursed her lips two hundred and fifty dollars. I
Speaker 1: remember screaming that figure several times, along with all the
Speaker 1: swear words I knew. I remember vocalizing, we are going
Speaker 1: to lose Rachel Meadow, the next great talent of cable news,
Speaker 1: to effing CNN, for two hundred and fifty fing dollars.
Speaker 1: Everything else after that statement is darkness. I know. I
Speaker 1: phoned Phil Griffin and threatened him. Is He recently confirmed
Speaker 1: for me that I asked her to leave before I
Speaker 1: called him and threatened him. I believe I warned him
Speaker 1: that if he did not sign her to a contributor's
Speaker 1: contract within twenty four hours, I would walk off the
Speaker 1: set during that night's primary coverage, or maybe the next
Speaker 1: week's or maybe during countdown tomorrow night. It would be
Speaker 1: a surprise. I'm also confident that I warned him that
Speaker 1: of all the talent on television, Larry King had the
Speaker 1: best knowledge of what and who else would succeed more
Speaker 1: than the rest of us combined. He was a savant,
Speaker 1: and when he saw her in real time on his
Speaker 1: primary night panel, we would never see her again, and
Speaker 1: she would have a CNN contract before midnight. I told
Speaker 1: Phil that when that happened, I would then kill him
Speaker 1: with my bare hands, or Jeff Zucker would kill him
Speaker 1: when she wound up beating the hell out of us
Speaker 1: in the ratings. This statement all took longer than this
Speaker 1: paragraph would imply, because I know, without fear of contradiction,
Speaker 1: every other word out of my mouth was either what
Speaker 1: we used to call an oath or the phrase Jesus
Speaker 1: h ka Christ. Mind you, these people the president of NBC,
Speaker 1: Jeff Zucker, and it's a year since they got rid
Speaker 1: of him at CNN, the president of NBC News Steve Cappus,
Speaker 1: and the soon to be president of MSNBC, Phil Griffin.
Speaker 1: These had been the same people who, about a year earlier,
Speaker 1: had decided that their ten PM host, Tucker Carlson, yep,
Speaker 1: Tucker Carlson was on MSNBC that Tucker Carlson did not
Speaker 1: need two people to play the role of liberal foil
Speaker 1: on his show at like fifty grand a year, So
Speaker 1: they kept one of them, his name was Max Kellerman,
Speaker 1: and they fired the other one. Her name was Rachel Maddow.
Speaker 1: They fired Rachel Maddow at MSNBC to save fifty thousand dollars.
Speaker 1: She was back now at MSNBC only because my producer
Speaker 1: is He had suggested making her a regular guest, and
Speaker 1: within a couple of months I realized she would be
Speaker 1: the next great host in cable news. And after months
Speaker 1: of pleading, including pleading with her because she didn't want
Speaker 1: to do it, I had just convinced them to put
Speaker 1: her back under contract. Except they had lied to me,
Speaker 1: and they had not put her back under contract. I
Speaker 1: may have mentioned this to Phil Griffin during our phone
Speaker 1: call one hundred and eleven different times. I may have
Speaker 1: mentioned it to him. I also telephoned Rachel. I did
Speaker 1: not swear at her here. Every other word out of
Speaker 1: my mouth was not an oath but an apology, I said.
Speaker 1: I had genuinely believed she was already being paid, and
Speaker 1: I was not only humiliated on behalf of my network,
Speaker 1: but that I was far more humiliated that I had
Speaker 1: not double checked with her that they'd actually given her
Speaker 1: the contract they told me they had given her. I
Speaker 1: begged her to please, please, please, don't go and see
Speaker 1: an end tonight. I did not ask her to skip
Speaker 1: out on them and return to us unless she thought
Speaker 1: she could pull that off gracefully and with a clean conscience,
Speaker 1: but just not to go on with Larry. And that's
Speaker 1: where I at the little four hundred and thirty seven
Speaker 1: dollars stunt. I'm sorry about the money situation, I said.
Speaker 1: I didn't know. Now I know I can only do this.
Speaker 1: I think they will give you forty or fifty thousand
Speaker 1: for a contributors deal, just to start. But what I
Speaker 1: will do is, and while making as many sound effects
Speaker 1: of exertion as I could dream up, I stretched around it,
Speaker 1: pulled my wallet out of my back pocket, and I
Speaker 1: emptied it onto my desk. I need to keep five
Speaker 1: bucks to tip my driver tonight. You can have the
Speaker 1: rest of whatever cash I have on me. I'm counting
Speaker 1: it now. There's one hundred twenty twenty twenty. My play
Speaker 1: by play skipped no bills four hundred and forty two
Speaker 1: bucks American five for the driver, the rest for you
Speaker 1: four hundred and thirty seven dollars. Rachel deal, She laughed,
Speaker 1: I'll see you tonight. I'll just tell Larry I couldn't
Speaker 1: be disloyaled to you. Oh, and I will take the money.
Speaker 1: And she took the money. In point of fact, when
Speaker 1: I like to say anything that Rachel Mattow did with
Speaker 1: her career after we got her show on the air
Speaker 1: in August of two thousand and eight, that's all her doing.
Speaker 1: I have nothing to do with that except being the
Speaker 1: lead in for the first two years. That's true. But
Speaker 1: I also like to say that I got that show
Speaker 1: on the air. And I also like to say I
Speaker 1: hired Rachel Mattow at MSNBC. And this is my point,
Speaker 1: it was not figuratively, it was not metaphorically. I hired
Speaker 1: her out of my own pocket. I literally hired Medow
Speaker 1: at MSNBC for four hundred and thirty seven dollars. And
Speaker 1: I will point this out again, I never even got
Speaker 1: the four hundred and thirty seven dollars back when I
Speaker 1: sent a segment a go doing TV damages the brain.
Speaker 1: I don't know if it's something in the camera. I
Speaker 1: don't know if it's something in the wiring. I don't
Speaker 1: know if it's something that attracts already flawed people to it.
Speaker 1: But the first thing it does is it takes whatever
Speaker 1: part of you is grateful and burns that to a cinder.
Speaker 1: You begin to think. I used to think this myself,
Speaker 1: that the people who helped you succeed somehow subtracted from
Speaker 1: your own value today and you had to erase them.
Speaker 1: The premise, as near as I can figure out, was
Speaker 1: if they were important to your success, were you important
Speaker 1: to your own success? Or was it all an accident
Speaker 1: of timing. It's illogical, paranoid and the epitome of ingratitude.
Speaker 1: Of course, then, of course that's the definition of MSNBC.
Speaker 1: Any who let me descend from the so box and
Speaker 1: send you on your way with my thanks for listening.
Speaker 1: Brian Ray and John Phillip Shaneil, the musical directors of Countdown, Arranged,
Speaker 1: produced and performed most of our music. Mister Chanelle handled
Speaker 1: orchestration and keyboards. Mister Ray was on the guitars, bass
Speaker 1: and drums as the third member of Tko Brothers, which
Speaker 1: produced it. I'm very grateful to them. Both our satirical
Speaker 1: and pithy musical comments are by the best baseball stadium
Speaker 1: organist ever, Nancy Faust. I am grateful to her contributions
Speaker 1: and the fact that she gave me an interview at
Speaker 1: UPI in nineteen eighty. The sports music is the Olderman
Speaker 1: theme from ESPN two. I'm grateful that Mitch Warren Davis
Speaker 1: wrote it, and I'm grateful to ESPN for letting me
Speaker 1: play it. Other music arranged and performed by the group
Speaker 1: No Horns Allowed, and I'm grateful to them. My announcer
Speaker 1: today was my friend John Dean, whose friendship is one
Speaker 1: of my greatest sources of pride and to whom I
Speaker 1: thank every day. And everything else was as ever my fault.
Speaker 1: That's countdown today just and forty five days until the
Speaker 1: scheduled end of his lane duck lame brained term, unless
Speaker 1: Musk removes him sooner. The next scheduled countdown is Monday.
Speaker 1: As always, bulletins, as the news warrants, remember Al Green
Speaker 1: is right, impeach Trump and Keith impeaching Trump. It won't
Speaker 1: pass now, it won't work now, it will win the
Speaker 1: Democrats the midterms until next time, I'm Keith Olberman. Good morning,
Speaker 1: good afternoon, goodnight, and good luck. Countdown with Keith Olderman
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Speaker 1: visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get
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