WEBVTT - No. 68: Smiling Depression - Did You Know This Was An Actual Thing? 0:00:00.320 --> 0:00:03.040 Hand Me My Purse is a production of iHeart Podcasts, 0:00:04.400 --> 0:00:08.920 So Friends and Ken on woop be Goldberg's Internet. This week, 0:00:08.960 --> 0:00:12.760 I was reading and I found something and it reads 0:00:13.400 --> 0:00:16.400 and it's so good. It's so good you might want 0:00:16.400 --> 0:00:19.279 to get a pen and paper and jot this down. 0:00:19.400 --> 0:00:22.200 So go ahead and hit pause so that you can 0:00:22.280 --> 0:00:22.560 do that. 0:00:22.880 --> 0:00:23.720 It says. 0:00:24.920 --> 0:00:30.760 A gentle reminder, you will never hear another person's voice 0:00:31.640 --> 0:00:36.879 more than you hear your own. Be intentional about the 0:00:36.880 --> 0:00:42.159 way you talk to yourself. That is so good. I'm 0:00:42.159 --> 0:00:45.240 gonna read it for you again. And usually I find 0:00:45.280 --> 0:00:49.720 these on threads, and I follow a lot of inspirational, 0:00:50.760 --> 0:00:57.280 motivational meme dealers, okay, because they be shelling it out 0:00:57.320 --> 0:01:01.840 like dope. It says, one more time for your mind, 0:01:01.960 --> 0:01:04.160 just in case you lost it, or you lost me, 0:01:04.319 --> 0:01:09.399 or you didn't get a pen. A gentle reminder. You 0:01:09.480 --> 0:01:13.560 will never hear another person's voice more than you hear 0:01:13.640 --> 0:01:19.240 your own, so be intentional about the way that you 0:01:19.319 --> 0:01:26.240 talk to yourself. Man, listen, this episode is about to 0:01:26.240 --> 0:01:31.240 get real, so buckle up, Buttercup, because we're about to 0:01:31.280 --> 0:01:54.320 go on a ride. I can't see the path that Okay, 0:01:54.640 --> 0:01:57.320 what's up? Y'all welcome to hand me my purse the podcast. 0:01:57.480 --> 0:02:00.480 I am Mimi Walker, and I will be your forever 0:02:00.560 --> 0:02:05.120 host each and every time you tune into this podcast. 0:02:05.400 --> 0:02:10.280 So go ahead and get comfortable. Grab yourself a glass 0:02:10.280 --> 0:02:13.760 of your favorite beverage, whether that's a prickly pair margarita, 0:02:14.240 --> 0:02:16.600 and that I need to let you guys know, is 0:02:16.639 --> 0:02:24.120 absolutely delish if it's made with skill and love or 0:02:24.160 --> 0:02:27.480 some high sea fruit punch, which is the shout out 0:02:27.520 --> 0:02:32.280 to high seafruit punch. You know, I don't drink it 0:02:32.280 --> 0:02:32.799 that often. 0:02:32.919 --> 0:02:33.360 I had it. 0:02:35.919 --> 0:02:39.720 I went to California for my cousin's wedding and me, 0:02:39.919 --> 0:02:42.440 my little brother and my little cousin Lindsey, who was 0:02:42.440 --> 0:02:46.520 a friend of the show. We ordered some wingstop. I'd 0:02:46.520 --> 0:02:50.880 never had wingstops. A little story in between during the greeting, 0:02:51.400 --> 0:02:55.160 and the wingstop was horrible, and my cousin and my brother, 0:02:55.400 --> 0:02:59.360 my little brother Isaiah, swore up and down that no, 0:02:59.560 --> 0:03:02.120 you got to stop another chance, because this is not 0:03:03.400 --> 0:03:05.560 a good representation of what it tastes like. 0:03:06.120 --> 0:03:07.160 But I'm gonna tell you what. 0:03:07.440 --> 0:03:11.799 Was, as the kids say, busting that high seafruit punch. 0:03:12.520 --> 0:03:15.360 I forgot how delicious it is. Don't drink it on 0:03:15.360 --> 0:03:18.920 a regular basis, maybe have it once every other year. 0:03:19.560 --> 0:03:22.680 But it was delicious, I'll tell you that much. It 0:03:22.800 --> 0:03:30.840 was absolutely freaking delicious. Okay, moving forward, grab yourself some 0:03:30.919 --> 0:03:34.880 high seafruit punch or a caramel apple spice from Starbucks. 0:03:35.520 --> 0:03:38.680 You know, it's fall and all of you pumpkin spice 0:03:38.720 --> 0:03:42.960 lovers are talking. I mean, the Internet is flooded with 0:03:43.120 --> 0:03:47.960 pumpkin spice talk. I'm not a pumpkin spice gal at all, 0:03:48.280 --> 0:03:51.000 but I am a caramel apple spice girl from Starbucks. 0:03:51.600 --> 0:03:54.120 So go ahead and grab yourself one of those. Go 0:03:54.200 --> 0:03:59.160 light yourself a candle, some incense, or burn yourself some sage, 0:03:59.240 --> 0:04:03.760 and just get ready to chill out and have a 0:04:03.760 --> 0:04:09.720 good time. Although this episode is not very chill, It's 0:04:09.800 --> 0:04:13.800 got quite a bit of information, but you know what, 0:04:14.520 --> 0:04:16.960 all of my episodes have chill, So get ready to 0:04:17.040 --> 0:04:28.880 chill out and have yourself a good time. What's up friends, again, 0:04:28.960 --> 0:04:31.920 it's Mimi resident Auntie Supreme here at hand me my 0:04:31.920 --> 0:04:35.039 purse and today I am sipping on water and that's it. 0:04:35.200 --> 0:04:46.880 Nothing fancy, just water today, friends. Why because I had 0:04:46.880 --> 0:04:50.080 my first session with a personal trainer at my gym. Yes, 0:04:50.160 --> 0:04:51.880 I did join a gym. I thought I told you 0:04:51.920 --> 0:04:54.800 all that, but maybe I didn't. Either way, My membership 0:04:54.839 --> 0:04:58.800 comes with two free personal training sessions. The first session 0:04:59.240 --> 0:05:01.680 is all about getting to know the trainer, and it's 0:05:01.720 --> 0:05:04.720 like a consultation. It's a lot of talking. And y'all 0:05:04.720 --> 0:05:07.680 know Cis can talk. It's what I do, It's what 0:05:07.720 --> 0:05:10.400 I get paid to do. I'm a talker and I 0:05:10.440 --> 0:05:12.360 always have been. I tell y'all that all the time. 0:05:12.400 --> 0:05:13.479 I've been talking since. 0:05:13.279 --> 0:05:13.880 I could talk. 0:05:14.040 --> 0:05:17.039 Okay, the session was supposed to be thirty minutes, but 0:05:17.640 --> 0:05:21.560 it ended up being ninety minutes, not nineteen ninety an 0:05:21.560 --> 0:05:25.520 hour and a half. Because I like to ask a 0:05:25.560 --> 0:05:27.479 lot of questions because I need to understand. I have 0:05:27.520 --> 0:05:30.440 a serious need to understand, because that is how I 0:05:30.480 --> 0:05:33.400 process information. I need to understand it before I can 0:05:33.440 --> 0:05:36.240 actually process it. So I asked a lot of questions. 0:05:37.040 --> 0:05:39.880 During the ninety minutes, I learned so much. I did 0:05:39.920 --> 0:05:42.880 this old body scan thing. I scanned your whole body, 0:05:42.880 --> 0:05:45.760 and I learned all about like the fat, the muscles, 0:05:45.960 --> 0:05:50.680 the water, the pounds, the ratios, the percentages, the resting 0:05:50.760 --> 0:05:54.280 metabolic rates. I learned all these things which was really 0:05:54.320 --> 0:06:00.000 helpful because I, even though I'm super creative, I definitely 0:06:00.320 --> 0:06:05.560 learn in a very logical and practical way. So when 0:06:05.560 --> 0:06:09.200 I started seeing numbers and we started adding and subtracting, 0:06:09.279 --> 0:06:12.679 and I was like, okay, this now this makes sense 0:06:13.360 --> 0:06:17.520 when I could understand it that way from that perspective. 0:06:17.520 --> 0:06:23.160 But anyway, I did the body scan and I learned 0:06:24.000 --> 0:06:28.240 that I am fucking dehydrated. 0:06:28.440 --> 0:06:28.640 Oh. 0:06:30.360 --> 0:06:33.880 I was in complete shock and I was mildly devastated. 0:06:35.200 --> 0:06:37.599 But it's all good because you know, I have to 0:06:37.600 --> 0:06:41.160 say that the session has me kind of focused now 0:06:41.240 --> 0:06:43.680 on making some shifts in a different kind of way 0:06:43.680 --> 0:06:46.800 because I understand it in a much more logical and 0:06:46.839 --> 0:06:49.680 practical way. So I'm ready to get to it. My 0:06:49.800 --> 0:06:52.480 next appointment is next week and that's the workout session. 0:06:53.000 --> 0:06:56.360 So y'all pray my strength and the Lord. 0:06:56.200 --> 0:07:00.440 Please Jesus, Jesus, Jesus, this is here. 0:07:00.839 --> 0:07:04.960 Yeah. I just keep says lifted in prayer because I 0:07:05.000 --> 0:07:07.200 don't want this man to kill me. Actually, I do 0:07:07.440 --> 0:07:10.280 really enjoy working out once I finally get to the gym. 0:07:10.360 --> 0:07:14.760 It's getting me there that sometimes historically has been a struggle, 0:07:14.800 --> 0:07:16.880 but you know what, it's a new day. I'm on 0:07:16.920 --> 0:07:19.600 a new path. I have a new mindset and I'm 0:07:19.720 --> 0:07:24.400 ready to handle my business. So realistically, I ain't even 0:07:24.400 --> 0:07:26.280 tripping because I'm about to handle my scandal. 0:07:26.520 --> 0:07:36.040 You get what I'm saying. You understand me? Oh yeah? 0:07:36.280 --> 0:07:45.600 Friends and Ken, Today's gym is It's one of those 0:07:45.640 --> 0:07:48.280 songs that I just kind of get into when I 0:07:48.320 --> 0:07:53.200 get into it, and when I get into it, it's 0:07:53.240 --> 0:07:56.160 so motivational for me, but it may not be that 0:07:56.200 --> 0:08:03.320 way for everybody else. The song is a song from 0:08:03.360 --> 0:08:06.920 a sister that helps from the UK. Her name is 0:08:07.040 --> 0:08:12.400 Little Simms. She is a British Nigerian actress and rapper 0:08:12.920 --> 0:08:16.679 from Islington, London. And I don't know if you guys 0:08:16.720 --> 0:08:20.920 know about Top Boy on Netflix, but she plays Dushane's 0:08:20.920 --> 0:08:23.840 baby Mava on Top Boy. And if you don't know 0:08:23.880 --> 0:08:28.960 about Top Boy, Top Moy, Top Boy, get familiar. Like 0:08:28.960 --> 0:08:32.040 I said, it's on Netflix. I love the show and 0:08:32.240 --> 0:08:36.040 if I could say so, it is some funny ass 0:08:36.120 --> 0:08:38.120 black men on that show, you know what I'm saying? 0:08:38.480 --> 0:08:41.160 Like it Watching that show made me say to myself, 0:08:41.520 --> 0:08:44.120 I gotta get to London because that's where my dude is. 0:08:44.280 --> 0:08:46.760 Like I know, that's where my man is. He waiting 0:08:46.800 --> 0:08:47.360 for me too. 0:08:47.559 --> 0:08:50.120 But anyway, stick to the game plan. 0:08:50.640 --> 0:08:52.760 Anyway, sister is killing the game right now. I really 0:08:52.840 --> 0:08:57.200 love her music, her sound, her energy like she's funky. 0:08:58.559 --> 0:09:02.440 She gives Lauren Hill vibes, she gives Missy Elliott vibes. 0:09:03.920 --> 0:09:07.560 But she's totally in her own lane. But this song 0:09:07.640 --> 0:09:09.679 right here, and I like a lot of her music actually, 0:09:10.080 --> 0:09:13.000 but this song right here is my jammy jam. And 0:09:13.160 --> 0:09:15.559 like I said, the song is called point and Kill 0:09:16.240 --> 0:09:20.079 and it's a situation. So I'm gonna stop talking about it. 0:09:20.160 --> 0:09:22.160 I want you to hear it. So go ahead and 0:09:22.720 --> 0:09:27.000 check this out. 0:09:27.640 --> 0:09:43.359 This no feel no body, no body, no body? 0:09:45.240 --> 0:09:48.600 Why don't kill as a kid say it's a bob. 0:09:49.880 --> 0:09:51.079 I know you like it. 0:09:51.080 --> 0:09:55.240 It's so good right This song is, like I said, 0:09:55.240 --> 0:09:56.839 it's what I listened to when I want to get 0:09:56.840 --> 0:09:59.200 in the zone. In the zone that I'm talking about 0:09:59.320 --> 0:10:01.680 is the zone that puts me in the mood to 0:10:01.920 --> 0:10:05.520 grind out for what I want. It's a song that 0:10:05.640 --> 0:10:08.719 makes me feel like I'm gonna hustle because I want this, 0:10:09.360 --> 0:10:11.400 you know what I mean? The zone that says I 0:10:11.480 --> 0:10:13.600 do what I want and I don't give a shit 0:10:13.640 --> 0:10:16.840 about what anybody else says or what anybody else has 0:10:16.880 --> 0:10:19.679 going on, because I'm going after what is mine, and 0:10:19.840 --> 0:10:22.400 abundance is mine, and it. 0:10:22.320 --> 0:10:26.000 May not bring that out of you. You may not. 0:10:26.280 --> 0:10:29.680 You may listen to this and be like, what is 0:10:29.720 --> 0:10:33.360 she talking about? But when I hear this song and 0:10:33.400 --> 0:10:35.559 I listen to it, and I listen to the chorus 0:10:36.720 --> 0:10:40.679 point and kill if I want it, it's mine. You 0:10:40.720 --> 0:10:47.240 can't stop me. Hey, listen, that's that laser focus. I 0:10:47.360 --> 0:10:49.880 just I just imagine seeing like, you know, the guns 0:10:49.920 --> 0:10:53.360 like Tony Montana used to have with the laser beans. 0:10:53.440 --> 0:10:55.280 I don't know what they're called, because I don't like guns. 0:10:55.320 --> 0:10:58.880 Guns freak me out. But it is the song that 0:10:58.920 --> 0:11:01.400 I listen to when I want to zone, when I 0:11:01.440 --> 0:11:03.960 want to hone in. Excuse me, when I get into 0:11:04.040 --> 0:11:05.760 the zone and I want to hone in on a 0:11:05.840 --> 0:11:09.559 specific goal and I want to go hard. 0:11:10.040 --> 0:11:12.920 Go listen to it. And of course you already know 0:11:13.640 --> 0:11:14.160 the video. 0:11:14.320 --> 0:11:22.200 Oh my god, the video is fucking amazing. It's some black, excellent, African, beautiful, nostalgic, 0:11:22.640 --> 0:11:25.280 colorful shit. 0:11:25.200 --> 0:11:26.080 Going on in the video. 0:11:26.160 --> 0:11:28.679 The linkers in the show notes, go look at the video. 0:11:28.760 --> 0:11:31.439 Now go just go right now, but then make sure 0:11:31.480 --> 0:11:33.360 to bring your ass back and listen to the rest 0:11:33.400 --> 0:11:35.839 of the show. But go look at the video and 0:11:35.920 --> 0:11:37.600 check the song out. I want you to do that. 0:11:37.760 --> 0:11:39.600 Go ahead, and then just make sure you come back 0:11:39.640 --> 0:11:40.800 so you can listen to the rest of the show 0:11:40.800 --> 0:12:03.280 because it's pretty interesting. Ye all right, So friends and 0:12:03.360 --> 0:12:06.720 can let's get into it. Okay, I'm gonna be really 0:12:07.200 --> 0:12:11.240 transparent in this episode, like I'm gonna be a little 0:12:11.320 --> 0:12:14.000 vulnerable with you guys, which is not new, I've done that. 0:12:14.120 --> 0:12:17.880 But I'm gonna be transparent and I'm gonna be transparent 0:12:17.920 --> 0:12:22.040 about where I am in this moment right now. If 0:12:22.040 --> 0:12:24.880 you have been listening to Hand Me My Purse since 0:12:24.920 --> 0:12:32.280 its inception, then you know that around September ish Sis 0:12:32.440 --> 0:12:36.160 gets a little bit of the blues, and that is 0:12:36.200 --> 0:12:41.280 for several reasons. There are a lot of not a lot, 0:12:41.480 --> 0:12:45.360 let me stop. There's a specific date in the month 0:12:45.360 --> 0:12:51.600 of September that is very triggering for me, and God 0:12:51.600 --> 0:12:55.160 bless my best friend. She always tries to help me 0:12:55.240 --> 0:13:02.800 out around that date to make sure that I am 0:13:02.840 --> 0:13:06.240 you know, busy or you know, doing something that brings 0:13:06.280 --> 0:13:10.439 me some peace or that excites me or makes me happy. 0:13:10.960 --> 0:13:16.840 But it's not a major way to get around it, 0:13:16.880 --> 0:13:20.679 I guess. But I appreciate all the help and the 0:13:20.720 --> 0:13:24.200 support and the love and encouragement that I get around 0:13:24.200 --> 0:13:28.640 that date. And it's not a heavy depression where like 0:13:28.760 --> 0:13:31.480 I don't want to leave my bed, or you know, 0:13:32.160 --> 0:13:36.040 I want to harm myself, or you know, I'm crying 0:13:36.080 --> 0:13:41.720 all day. But we always have to remember that depression 0:13:42.360 --> 0:13:49.520 can manifest itself in so many different ways, and it's 0:13:49.600 --> 0:13:52.199 just so many ways that you wouldn't even think about. 0:13:52.559 --> 0:13:54.800 Did you know that it can show up in ways 0:13:54.800 --> 0:13:59.559 that you would never even associate with depression. And I'll 0:13:59.559 --> 0:14:03.480 get I'll get into that in a second. But after 0:14:03.520 --> 0:14:06.280 I've read some of these symptoms, I was like, uh, oh, 0:14:07.000 --> 0:14:11.920 I might be dealing with what I found out is 0:14:12.000 --> 0:14:14.800 actually a thing that I had never heard of, Okay, 0:14:15.320 --> 0:14:17.680 And so I also want to say that just because 0:14:18.240 --> 0:14:20.440 you may have some of these symptoms, or you may 0:14:20.480 --> 0:14:23.120 have one of these symptoms, that doesn't mean that you 0:14:23.200 --> 0:14:26.520 are dealing with depression. You may just have one of 0:14:26.560 --> 0:14:29.320 the symptoms and you'll see what I'm talking about. 0:14:29.360 --> 0:14:32.560 But I know for me, I know me, I know 0:14:32.640 --> 0:14:35.680 my body, I know my mind. And so. 0:14:37.840 --> 0:14:40.080 The thing that I was talking about, you know, I 0:14:40.120 --> 0:14:41.960 said to myself, like I said that I might be 0:14:42.040 --> 0:14:44.800 dealing with something that I didn't even know was a thing, 0:14:45.280 --> 0:14:47.680 Like you know, I didn't even know this was a thing. 0:14:47.720 --> 0:14:57.640 And that, my friends, is hidden depression. Right. I'm sure 0:14:57.680 --> 0:14:58.720 you're thinking. 0:14:58.800 --> 0:15:02.760 What in the world is hidden depression, friends, and ken 0:15:02.880 --> 0:15:07.560 is when someone works really hard to conceal their symptoms 0:15:07.640 --> 0:15:10.800 and to show the world that they are fine or 0:15:10.840 --> 0:15:13.880 a Okay, here's the funny thing about me, though, I'm 0:15:13.880 --> 0:15:17.720 not good at faking it, not at all. I mean, 0:15:17.800 --> 0:15:20.240 like people will ask me constantly, are you okay? What's wrong? 0:15:20.440 --> 0:15:22.840 You seem different than and it's like, let me alone, 0:15:23.600 --> 0:15:25.160 that's what I want to say. I don't say that, 0:15:25.200 --> 0:15:25.520 but in. 0:15:25.440 --> 0:15:30.880 My mind, I'm like, let me the ark alone. I'm sorry, 0:15:31.560 --> 0:15:32.600 I didn't mean it's snort like that. 0:15:32.720 --> 0:15:36.280 But people when they have hidden depression may appear to 0:15:36.320 --> 0:15:40.400 be high functioning at work and or in social situations, 0:15:40.440 --> 0:15:43.360 but behind closed doors sometimes they could very well be 0:15:43.480 --> 0:15:47.760 living with some of the classic symptoms of depression that 0:15:47.880 --> 0:15:50.640 you know, everybody knows of, you know, the land in bed, 0:15:50.800 --> 0:15:53.120 the not getting out of bed, the crime, the one 0:15:53.120 --> 0:16:00.480 to hurt themselves, you know, sleeping all day, there's so many, 0:16:00.560 --> 0:16:04.880 you know, so many, the crying, you know, all the 0:16:04.880 --> 0:16:13.000 classic symptoms of depression. And just because you have hidden depression, 0:16:13.040 --> 0:16:17.520 that doesn't mean that you are suffering or dealing with 0:16:17.560 --> 0:16:20.840 the classic symptoms of depression. And that's hence the term 0:16:21.400 --> 0:16:30.520 hidden depression, smiling depression, or concealed depression. Yes, so, without 0:16:30.560 --> 0:16:33.760 further ado, now let's get into the nitty gritty. Let's 0:16:33.840 --> 0:16:36.360 look at what some of these hidden signs of depression 0:16:36.840 --> 0:16:39.520 look like. Okay, I'm gonna run them down for you. 0:16:40.400 --> 0:16:48.640 Weight loss or weight gain, headaches. You might want to 0:16:48.640 --> 0:16:51.040 get a pin, Go get a pin, get your pin, 0:16:52.520 --> 0:16:54.480 get a pin. I'm gonna go ahead and pause it, 0:16:54.600 --> 0:16:56.120 and you get a pin, and I'm gonna. 0:16:55.960 --> 0:16:56.560 Be right back. 0:16:58.440 --> 0:17:02.480 Okay, hopefully you pause it and you got yourself a 0:17:02.560 --> 0:17:06.000 pen and paper, and you want to go ahead entitle 0:17:06.080 --> 0:17:13.240 this symptoms or hidden signs of depression, symptoms of hidden depression, 0:17:13.880 --> 0:17:19.600 weight loss or weight gain, headaches. Now, please the advised, 0:17:19.600 --> 0:17:21.760 just because you lost a lot of weight or gained 0:17:21.760 --> 0:17:24.679 a lot of weight, or you get headaches, sometimes that 0:17:24.720 --> 0:17:28.480 doesn't necessarily mean that you're suffering from hidden depression. Okay, 0:17:28.520 --> 0:17:31.680 so don't go running taking stuff and running with it. 0:17:33.040 --> 0:17:48.000 Heart palpitations, back aches, digestive problems, extreme fatigue, sleeping too 0:17:48.080 --> 0:17:57.760 much or not enough, body aches and pains, nervousness, grief, 0:18:00.560 --> 0:18:10.000 misplaced anger, panic, working too much or being a workaholic, 0:18:12.240 --> 0:18:20.800 consuming too much alcohol or drugs, irritability, child, don't get 0:18:20.800 --> 0:18:24.000 me started about irritability and being moody. I don't know 0:18:24.080 --> 0:18:29.119 if it's hidden depression, paramenopause, or me just being a 0:18:29.119 --> 0:18:37.879 moody es scorpio moon. Changes in your appetite, negative self talk, 0:18:40.080 --> 0:18:48.560 forced happiness, also known as toxic positivity, being extremely pessimistic 0:18:48.800 --> 0:18:57.560 or negative in decisiveness or difficulty making decisions, excessive worrying, 0:18:59.720 --> 0:19:08.560 and and lastly low sex drive, just to name a few. Oo, 0:19:08.640 --> 0:19:14.320 Lord have mercy, shall please baby listen? When I looked 0:19:14.320 --> 0:19:16.640 at this list, I said to myself, since you might 0:19:16.680 --> 0:19:19.560 want to look into this a little further, okay, because 0:19:19.560 --> 0:19:24.680 I'm gonna tell you I have been dealing with, particularly 0:19:25.280 --> 0:19:32.840 in the month of September in August, about ninety five 0:19:32.880 --> 0:19:42.560 percent of these, maybe ninety percent of these, And we 0:19:42.560 --> 0:19:44.560 ain't even gonna get into the symptoms that we already 0:19:44.560 --> 0:19:47.280 know about that we mentioned earlier, like, let's not even 0:19:47.320 --> 0:19:50.000 mention the major symptoms that get talked about all the time, 0:19:50.080 --> 0:19:54.920 the heavy hitters that are always associated with depression. However, 0:19:55.240 --> 0:19:58.879 as with lots of mental health conditions, depression is not 0:19:58.960 --> 0:20:03.159 a cookie cutter on a situation. This is why I 0:20:03.200 --> 0:20:06.440 wanted to share those other ways that it can manifest 0:20:06.600 --> 0:20:08.520 or that it can show up in our lives. And 0:20:08.560 --> 0:20:13.240 the reason that I'm bringing this up is because, in 0:20:13.280 --> 0:20:18.320 the words of the Weekend, I feel it coming. I 0:20:18.400 --> 0:20:22.760 feel it coming, baby, I feel it coming. So I'm 0:20:22.760 --> 0:20:25.399 gonna try really hard to get in front of this. 0:20:27.560 --> 0:20:30.479 I told my therapists a couple of weeks ago. Shout 0:20:30.520 --> 0:20:36.480 out to my therapist. I told my therapists a couple 0:20:36.480 --> 0:20:39.639 of weeks ago that I feel weird, that something is off. 0:20:39.720 --> 0:20:40.399 I could feel it. 0:20:40.720 --> 0:20:42.720 And she asked me if I had been handling my 0:20:42.840 --> 0:20:46.800 business when it comes to self care and being intentional, 0:20:47.080 --> 0:20:48.159 and guess what, I'm not. 0:20:49.280 --> 0:20:52.320 Nope, this is not. I am not. 0:20:53.280 --> 0:20:58.720 School started, cheer started, and I'm just in school, work mode, 0:20:59.359 --> 0:21:02.199 cheer mode. And then that made me think that I 0:21:02.240 --> 0:21:05.280 need to get back to myself at some point. I 0:21:05.320 --> 0:21:09.160 got away from me me right, and I just became 0:21:10.200 --> 0:21:15.720 focused on being an employee and working with kids and 0:21:16.520 --> 0:21:20.120 being a cheerleading coach in the host of a podcast. 0:21:21.080 --> 0:21:26.040 But I done got away from the essence. 0:21:25.760 --> 0:21:30.000 Or the root, the root of me. Right. 0:21:30.280 --> 0:21:32.560 All these things that I do are amazing things. I 0:21:32.600 --> 0:21:35.679 don't have a problem with these things. I'm grateful for 0:21:35.760 --> 0:21:38.800 all of these things in my life. I love all 0:21:38.840 --> 0:21:41.639 of these things. I really love coaching cheer. Does it 0:21:41.640 --> 0:21:42.560 get on my nerves sometimes? 0:21:42.680 --> 0:21:43.600 Yes? Duh? 0:21:43.800 --> 0:21:45.560 I really love my job. Does it get on my 0:21:45.600 --> 0:21:46.280 nerves sometimes? 0:21:46.359 --> 0:21:47.200 Yes? I'm a human. 0:21:47.800 --> 0:21:50.520 I really love my podcast. Does it get on my nerves? 0:21:50.520 --> 0:21:51.840 Sometimes? Not? Really? 0:21:52.040 --> 0:21:54.600 Actually, I'm still having a good time doing this. It's 0:21:54.600 --> 0:21:56.640 still a lot of fun to me and doesn't really 0:21:56.720 --> 0:22:02.640 feel like work. But I got to get back to me, right, 0:22:03.160 --> 0:22:05.399 the essence of me, like the root of me, the 0:22:05.440 --> 0:22:09.920 me that I am without work, without a podcast, without cheer, 0:22:10.080 --> 0:22:15.480 without being somebody's daughter, somebody's granddaughter, somebody's friend, somebody's sister, 0:22:15.600 --> 0:22:18.720 somebody's niece, somebody's cousin. I got to just get back 0:22:18.720 --> 0:22:23.320 to me, like bare naked raw met And this is 0:22:23.359 --> 0:22:27.920 probably adding excuse me, this is probably adding to why 0:22:28.040 --> 0:22:32.480 I'm feeling off kilter and I'm just not really taking 0:22:32.520 --> 0:22:35.080 care of myself the way that I do when I'm 0:22:35.160 --> 0:22:40.919 fully focused and intentional about my self care rituals and routines, 0:22:41.800 --> 0:22:44.240 and so I am Yep, I'm going to get back 0:22:44.240 --> 0:22:46.760 to it. I just need to get focused and lock 0:22:46.920 --> 0:22:50.600 in on the ways in which I do care for me. 0:22:51.480 --> 0:22:54.800 I'm going to focus on joy, I'm going to focus 0:22:54.840 --> 0:22:58.560 on peace, and I'm going to focus on gratitude. And 0:22:58.600 --> 0:23:02.000 after reading about these symptoms, I'm going to make sure 0:23:02.040 --> 0:23:07.040 that it's not the fake versions of joy, piece and gratitude, 0:23:07.080 --> 0:23:10.920 because sometimes folks be doing that. Okay, let's be clear. 0:23:11.240 --> 0:23:16.520 Sometimes folks be out here fake joyful, fake peaceful, and 0:23:16.600 --> 0:23:21.840 fake grateful. Okay, the fake fools, that's what they call. 0:23:21.880 --> 0:23:25.399 That's what I'm calling people, fake fuls, the fakefuls like 0:23:25.520 --> 0:23:28.639 they be out here fronting. And if you listen to 0:23:28.640 --> 0:23:30.359 the show, you already know that when it comes to 0:23:30.400 --> 0:23:34.439 not being authentic or being fake or phony, like that 0:23:34.520 --> 0:23:37.879 shit makes me want a barf man, Like it literally 0:23:38.080 --> 0:23:44.720 makes me uncomfortable, Like I literally have a visceral reaction 0:23:45.440 --> 0:23:50.520 to being people are, especially people around me, being fake 0:23:50.920 --> 0:23:54.040 but when I feel like I cannot be my authentic self, 0:23:54.600 --> 0:23:59.920 like it does something to my physical person, my physical embodiment, 0:24:00.240 --> 0:24:01.320 Like it throws me off. 0:24:02.640 --> 0:24:03.680 And I just really. 0:24:03.480 --> 0:24:07.080 Don't understand how people can manage that, Like being phony. 0:24:07.359 --> 0:24:10.600 It costs too much, too much energy, too much time. 0:24:10.760 --> 0:24:12.800 It just costs too much. And people be out here 0:24:12.840 --> 0:24:15.399 doing the most and getting the least back from what 0:24:15.440 --> 0:24:16.639 they put out into the world. 0:24:17.920 --> 0:24:19.280 I don't get it. But whatever. 0:24:34.640 --> 0:24:36.359 Now, what I want to do with you guys, is 0:24:36.400 --> 0:24:40.920 I want to share some information from the text from 0:24:41.080 --> 0:24:47.040 a book that my therapist shoutouts are my therapists gave 0:24:47.080 --> 0:24:49.600 me a while back. I'm going to share some quick 0:24:49.680 --> 0:24:52.800 tricks to instantly feel better. 0:24:53.359 --> 0:24:53.800 Now. 0:24:54.359 --> 0:24:58.480 I always talk about on this show all the different 0:24:58.520 --> 0:25:03.960 ways you can ritual lie as gratitude and ritualize self 0:25:04.000 --> 0:25:07.800 care and peace, and I talk about prayer and meditation 0:25:08.200 --> 0:25:11.320 and you know, ways to get back to your center 0:25:11.440 --> 0:25:14.119 and all those things. And there are things that you 0:25:14.160 --> 0:25:16.480 can do immediately, some of them and some of them 0:25:16.520 --> 0:25:19.399 take a little more work. But this text gives you 0:25:19.840 --> 0:25:25.480 some really cute quick tricks. Okay, this is like a 0:25:25.600 --> 0:25:28.399 cheat sheet, so you should already have a pen and 0:25:28.440 --> 0:25:32.120 paper out. If you're driving, don't worry about it. Come 0:25:32.160 --> 0:25:34.920 back to it if you can. If you don't, come 0:25:34.960 --> 0:25:37.040 back to it, see if you can just remember some 0:25:37.080 --> 0:25:42.359 of them. It's real simple. It ain't heavy, Okay. So 0:25:42.880 --> 0:25:44.600 this is going to be a cheat sheet for you 0:25:44.680 --> 0:25:48.399 guys and for me shit, because I'm the one that 0:25:48.760 --> 0:25:51.320 I don't already made it real clear. I'm the motherfucker 0:25:51.359 --> 0:25:55.280 that's in it. Knee deep, in it, shut out to 0:25:56.119 --> 0:26:00.760 Parliament Funkadelic. Knee Deep is a song by Parliament Funkadelic, 0:26:01.320 --> 0:26:03.880 and it was number one on the charts. I don't 0:26:03.880 --> 0:26:05.639 know if it was Billboard or what, but it was 0:26:05.720 --> 0:26:08.200 number one. I would I'm gonna assume it's the Billboard charts, 0:26:08.359 --> 0:26:10.480 number one on the Board charts when I was born 0:26:10.600 --> 0:26:18.679 in nineteen seventy nine. So let's get into these quick tricks. 0:26:18.760 --> 0:26:22.560 I'm gonna pause it. So actually I'm not gonna posit. 0:26:23.680 --> 0:26:25.600 Let's just I am gonna posit it because I care 0:26:25.640 --> 0:26:27.280 about you, just in case you didn't have a pen 0:26:27.359 --> 0:26:30.640 and paper before. Let's go, all right, friends and Kim, 0:26:30.720 --> 0:26:34.320 let's get into it, all right. So these are some 0:26:34.440 --> 0:26:37.320 quick tricks to make you feel better instantly. Some of 0:26:37.359 --> 0:26:42.080 these I have never mentioned on this show because well, 0:26:42.160 --> 0:26:45.640 I didn't know. But I like them because they are 0:26:45.720 --> 0:26:48.080 not as intense as some of the ones that I 0:26:48.200 --> 0:26:51.240 may have mentioned before when I talk about ways to 0:26:51.280 --> 0:26:54.159 get back to yourself or whatever it is I'll be 0:26:54.160 --> 0:26:56.800 talking about when I be talking. But I like this, 0:26:57.000 --> 0:27:00.520 And so the book says, when life gets stressful and 0:27:00.560 --> 0:27:04.000 you feel like you're losing your emotional balance, use one 0:27:04.080 --> 0:27:06.440