1 00:00:00,480 --> 00:00:04,160 Speaker 1: Calling all my sweeties to the forefront. I'm your host, CHRISTOPHINEE. 2 00:00:04,200 --> 00:00:07,800 Speaker 2: Hazel, and this is to Keep It Positive Sweetie Show. 3 00:00:09,560 --> 00:00:11,760 Speaker 2: Hello and welcome to this episode of the Keep It 4 00:00:11,760 --> 00:00:15,240 Speaker 2: Positive Sweetie Show, a safe space to heal, laugh, grow 5 00:00:15,400 --> 00:00:15,880 Speaker 2: and love. 6 00:00:16,239 --> 00:00:19,760 Speaker 3: I'm your host, CHRISTOPHINEE. Hazel, and today is another solo 7 00:00:19,840 --> 00:00:24,120 Speaker 3: episode because you guys love these. Today, I'm answering questions. 8 00:00:24,320 --> 00:00:24,960 Speaker 1: It's fun. 9 00:00:25,079 --> 00:00:27,560 Speaker 3: I even broke the fourth wall and included some of 10 00:00:27,600 --> 00:00:29,320 Speaker 3: my crews, so let's have a good time. 11 00:00:29,360 --> 00:00:30,760 Speaker 1: I hope you guys enjoyed this one. 12 00:00:31,040 --> 00:00:34,239 Speaker 3: All right, guys, So I'm gonna do something different on 13 00:00:34,280 --> 00:00:36,600 Speaker 3: this episode. I'm gonna be answering a few questions that 14 00:00:36,640 --> 00:00:40,080 Speaker 3: will also bring you into my mindset and how I 15 00:00:40,120 --> 00:00:41,040 Speaker 3: think about things. 16 00:00:41,280 --> 00:00:42,879 Speaker 1: The first one is de Lulu or. 17 00:00:43,040 --> 00:00:48,200 Speaker 3: Manifestation HM, the power of dreaming big. I can definitely 18 00:00:48,280 --> 00:00:50,600 Speaker 3: tend to be a little de Lulu. I remember like 19 00:00:50,640 --> 00:00:53,960 Speaker 3: growing up and my mom would always say, oh my goodness, 20 00:00:54,040 --> 00:00:59,000 Speaker 3: you are literally the biggest risk taker of the family. 21 00:00:59,560 --> 00:01:01,279 Speaker 3: And I think it got me to where I am 22 00:01:01,320 --> 00:01:04,399 Speaker 3: today because I see no bounds to how far I 23 00:01:04,440 --> 00:01:08,840 Speaker 3: can go. Some of the craziest things I did growing 24 00:01:08,959 --> 00:01:14,400 Speaker 3: up I remember when I was in Washington, DC working 25 00:01:14,440 --> 00:01:19,400 Speaker 3: on Capitol Hill, I drove from DC to New York 26 00:01:19,480 --> 00:01:22,479 Speaker 3: to audition for Diddy's assistant. 27 00:01:23,440 --> 00:01:23,640 Speaker 2: Yeah. 28 00:01:23,640 --> 00:01:26,880 Speaker 3: It was crazy because I wanted to be a singer. 29 00:01:26,880 --> 00:01:28,600 Speaker 3: I wanted to be entertainer, and I was like, Okay, 30 00:01:28,640 --> 00:01:29,600 Speaker 3: what's the best way to. 31 00:01:29,560 --> 00:01:30,040 Speaker 1: Go about this. 32 00:01:30,160 --> 00:01:33,600 Speaker 3: I've always, even from back then, I've always been a 33 00:01:33,640 --> 00:01:36,640 Speaker 3: firm believer of putting yourself around what you want to 34 00:01:36,680 --> 00:01:39,640 Speaker 3: do so that you can learn from all aspects of 35 00:01:39,640 --> 00:01:41,920 Speaker 3: that space. And that was one of the craziest things 36 00:01:41,959 --> 00:01:43,440 Speaker 3: I did. I did clearly didn't get it. 37 00:01:43,880 --> 00:01:44,480 Speaker 1: And then. 38 00:01:46,680 --> 00:01:49,040 Speaker 3: I remember another time when I was working on Capitol 39 00:01:49,120 --> 00:01:53,720 Speaker 3: Hill in DC that this was when then Senator Obama 40 00:01:53,760 --> 00:02:00,120 Speaker 3: was running for his first term in presidency and his 41 00:02:00,120 --> 00:02:02,800 Speaker 3: his I don't know if he's a legislative correspondent or 42 00:02:03,160 --> 00:02:05,520 Speaker 3: but he worked in Cender Obama's office at the time, 43 00:02:05,800 --> 00:02:07,360 Speaker 3: and he was like, hey, Crystal, he was like, center 44 00:02:07,400 --> 00:02:10,639 Speaker 3: Obama's running for president, and we have some paid positions 45 00:02:10,680 --> 00:02:11,919 Speaker 3: to come work on the campaign. 46 00:02:12,360 --> 00:02:13,400 Speaker 1: Would you want to come do it? 47 00:02:13,400 --> 00:02:16,239 Speaker 3: And I'm like heck yeah, And he was like alright 48 00:02:16,360 --> 00:02:18,400 Speaker 3: that so I call my parents. I'm like, hey, guys, 49 00:02:19,120 --> 00:02:21,760 Speaker 3: I'm going to quit my job and I'm gonna go 50 00:02:21,919 --> 00:02:25,120 Speaker 3: work on the Obama campaign. And my parents were like, 51 00:02:25,160 --> 00:02:29,520 Speaker 3: you are crazy, and I was like, no, I really 52 00:02:29,520 --> 00:02:32,280 Speaker 3: think he's gonna win. My parents were like, I don't know, 53 00:02:32,400 --> 00:02:33,840 Speaker 3: you know, cause we had never seen it, you know, 54 00:02:33,880 --> 00:02:37,600 Speaker 3: and this is no slight to them, Like nobody ever 55 00:02:37,639 --> 00:02:39,560 Speaker 3: thought that we would have a black president, you know. 56 00:02:39,600 --> 00:02:42,400 Speaker 3: We were hopeful that we would have one, But at 57 00:02:42,400 --> 00:02:45,160 Speaker 3: that moment, they really weren't sure that it was smart 58 00:02:45,200 --> 00:02:48,240 Speaker 3: for me to quit my job to go work on 59 00:02:48,360 --> 00:02:51,680 Speaker 3: a campaign for someone who I could possibly not have 60 00:02:51,720 --> 00:02:52,120 Speaker 3: a job. 61 00:02:52,240 --> 00:02:57,760 Speaker 1: After that moment needs to say I was right, they 62 00:02:57,760 --> 00:02:59,880 Speaker 1: were wrong. No, but he won. 63 00:03:00,280 --> 00:03:02,239 Speaker 3: And after that they were like, you know what, We're 64 00:03:02,280 --> 00:03:04,320 Speaker 3: not gonna tell you what you can and cannot do. 65 00:03:04,400 --> 00:03:06,079 Speaker 3: Just go for it, because I could have been working 66 00:03:06,120 --> 00:03:08,040 Speaker 3: in the White House for the first black president, you know, 67 00:03:08,639 --> 00:03:12,320 Speaker 3: but that's neither here nor there. So yeah, I'm I 68 00:03:12,320 --> 00:03:16,160 Speaker 3: think I'm definitely Delulu when it comes to manifesting my dreams. 69 00:03:16,240 --> 00:03:18,520 Speaker 3: So I guess that has played a huge part in 70 00:03:18,560 --> 00:03:23,200 Speaker 3: my success today and literally since a kid, I don't 71 00:03:23,240 --> 00:03:25,320 Speaker 3: care if anybody likes it or doesn't like it, as 72 00:03:25,400 --> 00:03:28,000 Speaker 3: long as I set my mind to it, there's no 73 00:03:28,200 --> 00:03:32,280 Speaker 3: stopping me. So call me de Lulu or whatever you 74 00:03:32,280 --> 00:03:36,320 Speaker 3: wanna call me. But yeah, alright, So the next one 75 00:03:36,520 --> 00:03:41,080 Speaker 3: is how do I make everyday moments feel magical. I 76 00:03:41,080 --> 00:03:42,880 Speaker 3: feel like I try to make everything that I do 77 00:03:42,920 --> 00:03:43,760 Speaker 3: fun and enjoyable. 78 00:03:43,800 --> 00:03:46,400 Speaker 1: I don't really do anything that I don't enjoy. 79 00:03:46,560 --> 00:03:48,920 Speaker 3: You know, there are some things where like, uh, this 80 00:03:48,960 --> 00:03:50,920 Speaker 3: isn't the most fun thing, but I know it's good 81 00:03:50,960 --> 00:03:52,600 Speaker 3: for me, so I do it and then I end 82 00:03:52,680 --> 00:03:58,080 Speaker 3: up loving it. But things that I make enjoyable and 83 00:03:58,120 --> 00:03:59,920 Speaker 3: that I just really love. I love my daily roots. 84 00:04:00,520 --> 00:04:03,360 Speaker 3: I love my self care routines. You guys know, in 85 00:04:03,400 --> 00:04:06,720 Speaker 3: the mornings, I do my meditation, I pray, I read 86 00:04:06,720 --> 00:04:09,680 Speaker 3: my Bible, and I journal in my like the Flame 87 00:04:09,680 --> 00:04:12,360 Speaker 3: Within journal. That is very therapeutic for me, and it 88 00:04:12,400 --> 00:04:14,720 Speaker 3: really helps me kind of get centered in the day 89 00:04:15,360 --> 00:04:18,520 Speaker 3: and helps me fight off all the craziness that I'm 90 00:04:18,560 --> 00:04:23,840 Speaker 3: ready to face throughout the day, things that make me 91 00:04:23,880 --> 00:04:26,280 Speaker 3: feel like I'm in a movie. 92 00:04:26,520 --> 00:04:27,400 Speaker 1: So I just had a moment. 93 00:04:27,400 --> 00:04:32,159 Speaker 3: I was in New York Fashion Week and I, uh, 94 00:04:32,880 --> 00:04:35,279 Speaker 3: I was sitting next to Oh my god, it's such 95 00:04:35,320 --> 00:04:38,880 Speaker 3: a amazing moment. I was sitting next to j Manuel, who 96 00:04:38,880 --> 00:04:41,960 Speaker 3: if you've watched America's Next Top Model, he was one 97 00:04:42,040 --> 00:04:45,000 Speaker 3: of the guest judges that always made appearances on America's 98 00:04:45,080 --> 00:04:45,760 Speaker 3: Next Top Model. 99 00:04:45,839 --> 00:04:50,839 Speaker 1: So I have an just a great, great love for 100 00:04:51,000 --> 00:04:51,680 Speaker 1: j Manuel. 101 00:04:51,760 --> 00:04:53,480 Speaker 3: So I got to sit next him at the Romeo 102 00:04:53,560 --> 00:04:55,800 Speaker 3: Hunt show. And anybody who knows me knows that the 103 00:04:55,800 --> 00:04:59,160 Speaker 3: Devil Wars product is one of my favorite movies starring 104 00:04:59,200 --> 00:05:03,320 Speaker 3: Mail Street. And we're at the show and the show 105 00:05:03,440 --> 00:05:05,880 Speaker 3: was getting started late, and I had a very very 106 00:05:06,000 --> 00:05:08,000 Speaker 3: tight schedule that day where I had to be at 107 00:05:08,040 --> 00:05:10,440 Speaker 3: another show by five o'clock, so I was banking on 108 00:05:10,560 --> 00:05:14,599 Speaker 3: that show starting on time, and Jago's honey, he was like, 109 00:05:14,960 --> 00:05:17,279 Speaker 3: you need to leave now, and I was like, what 110 00:05:17,279 --> 00:05:17,680 Speaker 3: do you mean. 111 00:05:17,720 --> 00:05:19,520 Speaker 1: He was like, you don't want to be late for 112 00:05:19,560 --> 00:05:19,960 Speaker 1: that show. 113 00:05:20,040 --> 00:05:22,760 Speaker 3: He said, in the fashion world there's a fifteen minute 114 00:05:22,760 --> 00:05:25,479 Speaker 3: grace period. And he was like, by now and a 115 00:05:25,520 --> 00:05:28,920 Speaker 3: winter would be walking out, you should go. And I 116 00:05:28,920 --> 00:05:30,840 Speaker 3: swear in that moment, I was like, this is a 117 00:05:30,880 --> 00:05:32,160 Speaker 3: scene from a movie. 118 00:05:32,920 --> 00:05:34,120 Speaker 1: It felt like a movie. 119 00:05:35,160 --> 00:05:37,720 Speaker 3: There's so many points in my life that I feel 120 00:05:37,760 --> 00:05:41,000 Speaker 3: like feel kind of like a movie where I look 121 00:05:41,040 --> 00:05:42,880 Speaker 3: back and I'm like, that's. 122 00:05:42,720 --> 00:05:44,880 Speaker 1: My life, that's really my life. 123 00:05:46,839 --> 00:05:49,360 Speaker 3: So yeah, those are ways that I'm that I make 124 00:05:49,440 --> 00:05:52,480 Speaker 3: my life fun. And then also moments of my life 125 00:05:52,480 --> 00:05:52,920 Speaker 3: that kind. 126 00:05:52,839 --> 00:05:57,920 Speaker 1: Of felt like a movie. Let's see what we have next, ooh, 127 00:05:58,160 --> 00:05:58,920 Speaker 1: the glow up era. 128 00:06:00,080 --> 00:06:03,200 Speaker 3: We need to find some pictures of me before now 129 00:06:04,279 --> 00:06:09,479 Speaker 3: I look crazy. Somebody found a like ill I probably 130 00:06:09,520 --> 00:06:10,960 Speaker 3: posted it, but it was a picture of me when 131 00:06:10,960 --> 00:06:11,479 Speaker 3: I was a kid. 132 00:06:11,560 --> 00:06:14,719 Speaker 1: My teeth were all over the place and I never wear. 133 00:06:14,560 --> 00:06:16,560 Speaker 3: Bracest, so it was like, I guess as they grew 134 00:06:16,560 --> 00:06:20,119 Speaker 3: and they just grew in straight, but at that moment 135 00:06:20,240 --> 00:06:22,159 Speaker 3: is like one was growing in. It was really bad. 136 00:06:23,920 --> 00:06:25,599 Speaker 3: Even like through high school. I look back at my 137 00:06:25,640 --> 00:06:28,400 Speaker 3: senior picture, like how thin my eyebrows were. I'd be like, 138 00:06:28,480 --> 00:06:30,279 Speaker 3: oh my gosh, what were you thinking? 139 00:06:30,320 --> 00:06:30,599 Speaker 1: Girl? 140 00:06:31,880 --> 00:06:38,360 Speaker 3: But becoming my best self inside out? I think for 141 00:06:38,440 --> 00:06:42,599 Speaker 3: the longest I've pretty much been a very confident person. 142 00:06:42,760 --> 00:06:44,680 Speaker 3: But there was a phase in my life where I 143 00:06:44,720 --> 00:06:47,800 Speaker 3: kind of lost myself in my identity and trying to 144 00:06:47,839 --> 00:06:48,760 Speaker 3: find myself. 145 00:06:49,160 --> 00:06:51,680 Speaker 1: And I think where I am. 146 00:06:51,640 --> 00:06:56,720 Speaker 3: Now, I am so firm and who I am. I 147 00:06:56,760 --> 00:06:58,960 Speaker 3: love who I am inside out. I love the skin 148 00:06:59,040 --> 00:07:02,320 Speaker 3: I'm in. Of course, there's moments where I gained little 149 00:07:02,320 --> 00:07:05,200 Speaker 3: weight and y'all be m I'll be seeing y'all, y'all 150 00:07:05,240 --> 00:07:08,280 Speaker 3: be talking about is she pregnant, she didn't, she can't fat, 151 00:07:08,839 --> 00:07:12,520 Speaker 3: all these things. But there's times where I I am 152 00:07:12,600 --> 00:07:14,240 Speaker 3: hard on myself. You guys don't even have to say 153 00:07:14,240 --> 00:07:16,240 Speaker 3: those things because I am so hard on myself. 154 00:07:16,280 --> 00:07:16,840 Speaker 1: I see it. 155 00:07:17,160 --> 00:07:18,680 Speaker 3: I'm like, all right, let me fix it. And there's 156 00:07:18,680 --> 00:07:20,440 Speaker 3: some things I have to do for work where they're like, 157 00:07:20,560 --> 00:07:22,280 Speaker 3: you do not lose any weight. We need to actually 158 00:07:22,320 --> 00:07:25,280 Speaker 3: gain some weight because you're pregnant or whatever the case 159 00:07:25,320 --> 00:07:29,400 Speaker 3: and being we need it to look real. But yeah, 160 00:07:29,440 --> 00:07:31,560 Speaker 3: that for the most part, I am very confident, but 161 00:07:32,280 --> 00:07:34,640 Speaker 3: there were times where I was like, ooh, girl, like 162 00:07:34,680 --> 00:07:37,320 Speaker 3: you gotta really pull it together. But I think things 163 00:07:37,360 --> 00:07:40,320 Speaker 3: that I've done to get to that point is honestly 164 00:07:41,560 --> 00:07:44,400 Speaker 3: just understanding that one year made in the image of God, 165 00:07:44,480 --> 00:07:46,640 Speaker 3: there is no one else like you. And I think 166 00:07:46,720 --> 00:07:49,600 Speaker 3: there was this moment in our culture in society where 167 00:07:49,640 --> 00:07:52,040 Speaker 3: everybody was just walk we all, everybody was looking the same, 168 00:07:52,160 --> 00:07:54,600 Speaker 3: like everybody had the body, and it was like there 169 00:07:54,680 --> 00:08:01,000 Speaker 3: was no uniqueness, and I would compare myself to all 170 00:08:01,040 --> 00:08:02,960 Speaker 3: these girls, you get on social media and everybody has 171 00:08:03,000 --> 00:08:07,160 Speaker 3: the perfect body. And it was a moment where I 172 00:08:07,200 --> 00:08:08,720 Speaker 3: was just like, Okay, maybe I need to do a 173 00:08:08,720 --> 00:08:09,400 Speaker 3: little something here. 174 00:08:09,480 --> 00:08:10,480 Speaker 1: You under staying a little here. 175 00:08:11,080 --> 00:08:15,360 Speaker 3: And I remember like not feeling my best self in 176 00:08:15,480 --> 00:08:18,440 Speaker 3: those moments. But once I got past that and realized, 177 00:08:18,560 --> 00:08:21,040 Speaker 3: you know what you are good, you know, like, do 178 00:08:21,080 --> 00:08:23,080 Speaker 3: your thing, do what works for you. And I don'tkno 179 00:08:23,160 --> 00:08:25,080 Speaker 3: nobody for what they do. Do you think it will 180 00:08:25,120 --> 00:08:27,720 Speaker 3: works for you? But as long as you feel good 181 00:08:27,760 --> 00:08:30,360 Speaker 3: about it. And once I got to that place, I 182 00:08:30,480 --> 00:08:32,760 Speaker 3: was good. But I had to stop comparing myself to 183 00:08:32,800 --> 00:08:34,280 Speaker 3: other people and put the phone down. 184 00:08:35,440 --> 00:08:35,760 Speaker 1: Child. 185 00:08:38,160 --> 00:08:42,000 Speaker 3: Confidence is contagious. How you walk into any room like 186 00:08:42,240 --> 00:08:44,560 Speaker 3: you own it. Okay, guys, let me tell you something. 187 00:08:47,559 --> 00:08:50,480 Speaker 3: I am a confident woman. But when I walk into rooms, 188 00:08:50,520 --> 00:08:52,880 Speaker 3: I'm not the girl that's like, Hi. 189 00:08:52,760 --> 00:08:54,719 Speaker 1: Hey, I'm Crystal, nice to meet you. 190 00:08:54,840 --> 00:08:58,079 Speaker 3: I am the girl that's in the corner, like, not networking, 191 00:08:58,200 --> 00:09:02,120 Speaker 3: not talking to people. So I had to take people 192 00:09:02,200 --> 00:09:05,080 Speaker 3: with me that don't mind doing that, you know. So 193 00:09:05,559 --> 00:09:07,960 Speaker 3: I don't know if I really walk into rooms like 194 00:09:08,000 --> 00:09:09,920 Speaker 3: I own it. You know, I do walk in and 195 00:09:09,920 --> 00:09:13,560 Speaker 3: if I'm spoken to I'm definitely going to speak with 196 00:09:13,600 --> 00:09:18,120 Speaker 3: you confidently and carrying a great conversation so that when 197 00:09:18,160 --> 00:09:20,040 Speaker 3: you leave it's like, Yo, that was a really dope conversation. 198 00:09:20,160 --> 00:09:22,640 Speaker 3: But as sorry as me walking in and just. 199 00:09:22,640 --> 00:09:24,040 Speaker 1: Kind of owning the room. 200 00:09:24,200 --> 00:09:27,960 Speaker 3: No, Like, I feel like when you live your life 201 00:09:27,960 --> 00:09:31,160 Speaker 3: in the spotlight, you kind of tend to like sit 202 00:09:31,280 --> 00:09:32,880 Speaker 3: back in those scenarios. 203 00:09:33,440 --> 00:09:36,120 Speaker 1: So I don't know if I really walk in and 204 00:09:36,160 --> 00:09:36,559 Speaker 1: own it. 205 00:09:36,520 --> 00:09:36,760 Speaker 3: But. 206 00:09:38,280 --> 00:09:41,920 Speaker 1: Yeah, I'll be chilling. I really be chilling. 207 00:09:42,640 --> 00:09:46,200 Speaker 3: Uh. Let's see soft life versus the hustle life. 208 00:09:46,240 --> 00:09:52,040 Speaker 1: Mm, can you have both? Oh? My goodness. So it's 209 00:09:52,080 --> 00:09:59,280 Speaker 1: just tough for me because I I feel like. 210 00:10:01,600 --> 00:10:05,720 Speaker 3: You have to be very intentional about your soft life 211 00:10:05,760 --> 00:10:08,760 Speaker 3: if you are a woman or man, whoever it is, 212 00:10:08,840 --> 00:10:12,720 Speaker 3: that is about your hustling about your business. A lot 213 00:10:12,720 --> 00:10:16,280 Speaker 3: of times, I think we have misconstrued the fact that 214 00:10:16,720 --> 00:10:19,560 Speaker 3: being about our business we put aside our soft side, 215 00:10:19,600 --> 00:10:21,600 Speaker 3: because when you're about your business, you had to you 216 00:10:21,600 --> 00:10:23,480 Speaker 3: don't put on your masculine hat and be tough so 217 00:10:23,480 --> 00:10:26,080 Speaker 3: people don't run over you and things like that. But 218 00:10:26,880 --> 00:10:31,160 Speaker 3: I think for me, I'm finally finding the balance of 219 00:10:31,280 --> 00:10:33,960 Speaker 3: doing things that bring out that softer side. Because honey, 220 00:10:34,000 --> 00:10:36,760 Speaker 3: I lost it for a minute, Like I was, I 221 00:10:36,760 --> 00:10:37,560 Speaker 3: gotta do everything. 222 00:10:37,559 --> 00:10:38,440 Speaker 1: I'm hard, you know what I'm saying. 223 00:10:38,440 --> 00:10:39,880 Speaker 3: If man, I ain't got nobody to help me, so 224 00:10:39,960 --> 00:10:41,880 Speaker 3: let me just do it myself, like I was doing everything. 225 00:10:41,880 --> 00:10:44,200 Speaker 3: And I remember at one point in my life, I 226 00:10:44,320 --> 00:10:46,440 Speaker 3: just like broke down crime cause I'm like, dang, like 227 00:10:46,480 --> 00:10:49,240 Speaker 3: I don't have anybody to like help with anything. You 228 00:10:49,280 --> 00:10:51,760 Speaker 3: ever feel like that, Dria, Yes, like, And it was 229 00:10:51,760 --> 00:10:57,199 Speaker 3: something as simple as the garbage disposal. My garbage disposal 230 00:10:57,240 --> 00:11:01,000 Speaker 3: broke and I was like, do everything. I'm trying to 231 00:11:01,000 --> 00:11:03,720 Speaker 3: build a business. I was new to acting and trying 232 00:11:03,720 --> 00:11:08,200 Speaker 3: to bounce out that schedule and my whole life is changing, 233 00:11:08,440 --> 00:11:11,040 Speaker 3: and I'm like, I literally am doing all this by myself, 234 00:11:11,440 --> 00:11:13,760 Speaker 3: you know, like I didn't have another human body to 235 00:11:13,840 --> 00:11:16,560 Speaker 3: help me with it. And I think in that moment, 236 00:11:16,600 --> 00:11:19,200 Speaker 3: I was like the soft life started to kind of 237 00:11:19,240 --> 00:11:21,640 Speaker 3: like become more populix. I think a lot of women 238 00:11:21,679 --> 00:11:25,320 Speaker 3: who are entrepreneurs and successful started to realize, dang, I'm 239 00:11:25,400 --> 00:11:27,400 Speaker 3: doing this on my own, and I've kind of become hard. 240 00:11:27,600 --> 00:11:28,400 Speaker 3: I'm very hard. 241 00:11:30,320 --> 00:11:33,880 Speaker 1: I'm harder than hard, harder than hard. 242 00:11:34,320 --> 00:11:37,840 Speaker 3: Self like me, I want yes, But do you feel 243 00:11:37,880 --> 00:11:39,880 Speaker 3: like that's something that we as women have to really 244 00:11:39,960 --> 00:11:42,080 Speaker 3: kind of take control of even if we don't have 245 00:11:42,120 --> 00:11:44,480 Speaker 3: a man that can make our lives easier, because I 246 00:11:44,480 --> 00:11:46,600 Speaker 3: think a lot of times we like think that somebody 247 00:11:46,640 --> 00:11:49,040 Speaker 3: else has to come in and do that. Is that 248 00:11:49,120 --> 00:11:51,960 Speaker 3: something that we can like implement into our own lives 249 00:11:52,080 --> 00:11:53,480 Speaker 3: or do you think it's just easier when you have 250 00:11:53,600 --> 00:11:55,320 Speaker 3: somebody to kind of land though? 251 00:11:55,520 --> 00:11:59,439 Speaker 4: Well, I think I'm a little different from you because 252 00:12:00,160 --> 00:12:03,280 Speaker 4: where you are a single parent, you're forced. 253 00:12:04,840 --> 00:12:07,440 Speaker 1: That's a different asset. Yeah, harder, Yeah. 254 00:12:07,520 --> 00:12:10,880 Speaker 4: Doing things yourself and stuff like that, versus being single. 255 00:12:11,240 --> 00:12:11,959 Speaker 1: That's being single. 256 00:12:12,000 --> 00:12:14,000 Speaker 4: You could kind of do more of the soft life. 257 00:12:14,200 --> 00:12:18,160 Speaker 4: But as a parent and an entrepreneur and a working 258 00:12:18,280 --> 00:12:22,760 Speaker 4: momb and the go gotta do, it's kind of hard. 259 00:12:23,000 --> 00:12:25,280 Speaker 1: Yeah, I can see that kind of hard. I didn't 260 00:12:25,320 --> 00:12:26,559 Speaker 1: think of that from that perspective. 261 00:12:27,040 --> 00:12:28,760 Speaker 3: Yeah, because I don't have any kids, so I don't 262 00:12:28,760 --> 00:12:29,920 Speaker 3: really have anything. 263 00:12:29,520 --> 00:12:30,439 Speaker 1: Else your soft life. 264 00:12:30,480 --> 00:12:31,719 Speaker 4: You're gonna get your cash. 265 00:12:34,800 --> 00:12:35,880 Speaker 1: You like, girl, what plates? 266 00:12:37,080 --> 00:12:39,199 Speaker 4: Why are you gonna apply on dropping kids off at school? 267 00:12:39,400 --> 00:12:39,800 Speaker 5: Right? 268 00:12:40,280 --> 00:12:43,199 Speaker 4: But there is a balance that you you can do 269 00:12:43,880 --> 00:12:46,280 Speaker 4: when you have a lot of things going on I 270 00:12:46,320 --> 00:12:48,319 Speaker 4: fit in my plates, I feel in going to work out, 271 00:12:48,360 --> 00:12:52,160 Speaker 4: I fit in my facials, but then an hour later, 272 00:12:52,800 --> 00:12:53,439 Speaker 4: I'm back to. 273 00:12:53,400 --> 00:12:54,160 Speaker 3: The hard life back. 274 00:12:54,600 --> 00:12:56,760 Speaker 1: Oh yeah, that's real. That's real. 275 00:12:57,000 --> 00:12:58,920 Speaker 3: So I think for both of us really more about 276 00:12:58,920 --> 00:13:01,640 Speaker 3: finding that balance and kind of pending in that time 277 00:13:01,720 --> 00:13:05,839 Speaker 3: to like I gotta have myself timed. Yes, well, I 278 00:13:06,000 --> 00:13:09,319 Speaker 3: k think that kind of also ties into like burnout 279 00:13:10,360 --> 00:13:12,199 Speaker 3: because you know what I'm saying, When you don't take 280 00:13:12,240 --> 00:13:14,559 Speaker 3: the time to be intentional about the time and space 281 00:13:14,600 --> 00:13:18,120 Speaker 3: that you need as women, it like we end up 282 00:13:18,160 --> 00:13:18,679 Speaker 3: burning out. 283 00:13:18,960 --> 00:13:19,760 Speaker 1: Definitely burn out. 284 00:13:20,200 --> 00:13:24,079 Speaker 3: Mm yeah, so it tell me how I recharge or burnout? 285 00:13:24,120 --> 00:13:29,920 Speaker 1: Now listen, I will tell everybody out. I can't. 286 00:13:30,200 --> 00:13:34,000 Speaker 3: Yeah, Like, I'm very firm when it comes to my boundaries. 287 00:13:33,559 --> 00:13:36,400 Speaker 1: Of No, you've got to sit boundaries. 288 00:13:36,960 --> 00:13:39,680 Speaker 3: I have to, like even like now, like I already 289 00:13:39,720 --> 00:13:41,480 Speaker 3: told them, on a certain date when I'm getting ready 290 00:13:41,520 --> 00:13:44,720 Speaker 3: prepare to go back for sisters, don't call me for anything. 291 00:13:44,800 --> 00:13:45,880 Speaker 1: Yep. Let you know, so we're do. 292 00:13:46,280 --> 00:13:49,120 Speaker 3: I will work my tail to the bone up until 293 00:13:49,120 --> 00:13:50,680 Speaker 3: that point so you have everything you need for me 294 00:13:50,760 --> 00:13:53,600 Speaker 3: to take that month off because once that I'm focused 295 00:13:53,640 --> 00:13:56,160 Speaker 3: on that and it's so much already knew, you know how, 296 00:13:56,200 --> 00:13:57,960 Speaker 3: like you can see it in uh, in advance, like 297 00:13:58,080 --> 00:14:00,439 Speaker 3: it's too much, Like so, l I kN know by 298 00:14:00,480 --> 00:14:01,839 Speaker 3: this point, I'm gonna be done. 299 00:14:02,040 --> 00:14:02,360 Speaker 1: Yeah. 300 00:14:02,480 --> 00:14:06,840 Speaker 3: So I think having those healthy boundaries of saying no 301 00:14:07,400 --> 00:14:08,920 Speaker 3: is like so important here, that's. 302 00:14:08,760 --> 00:14:12,600 Speaker 4: What anybody, friends. 303 00:14:12,640 --> 00:14:15,160 Speaker 1: Yeah, clients, all of that. Do you have trouble saying no? 304 00:14:16,000 --> 00:14:18,920 Speaker 1: I used to me too, but I I love it now. 305 00:14:20,840 --> 00:14:24,120 Speaker 1: No and no, that's it. It's a sentence. It's it's 306 00:14:24,120 --> 00:14:29,320 Speaker 1: a complete sentence. No, no, No, I don't. 307 00:14:29,120 --> 00:14:29,920 Speaker 4: Feel bad about it. 308 00:14:29,960 --> 00:14:30,240 Speaker 3: At first. 309 00:14:30,280 --> 00:14:31,400 Speaker 4: I used to feel bad, like I don't want to 310 00:14:31,440 --> 00:14:32,240 Speaker 4: hurt nobody feelings. 311 00:14:32,560 --> 00:14:32,880 Speaker 3: No. 312 00:14:32,960 --> 00:14:37,560 Speaker 1: No, you know, now if like the right person that 313 00:14:37,640 --> 00:14:44,400 Speaker 1: you she said, like. 314 00:14:44,520 --> 00:14:46,400 Speaker 4: Girl, let's go, girl, I don't feel like it. 315 00:14:48,720 --> 00:14:51,280 Speaker 1: You better get the way. 316 00:14:54,160 --> 00:14:59,720 Speaker 3: Yes it is, yeah, yeah, And I mean I think 317 00:14:59,760 --> 00:15:03,280 Speaker 3: that's to like finding the balance of like prioritizing your time. 318 00:15:03,120 --> 00:15:05,400 Speaker 1: With everybody, you know, so that you don't neglect people. 319 00:15:05,560 --> 00:15:08,320 Speaker 1: But also said that you're not neglecting yourself. Yep, because 320 00:15:08,320 --> 00:15:08,800 Speaker 1: there's weeks. 321 00:15:08,800 --> 00:15:10,560 Speaker 3: So I was like, oh my goodness, I have literally 322 00:15:10,640 --> 00:15:13,080 Speaker 3: like said yes to everybody every day of the week, 323 00:15:13,640 --> 00:15:15,160 Speaker 3: and by Saturday. 324 00:15:14,640 --> 00:15:16,400 Speaker 1: It's like I'm so tired. I just wish I had 325 00:15:16,480 --> 00:15:18,520 Speaker 1: said no to one of these things. 326 00:15:18,560 --> 00:15:20,480 Speaker 4: You get emotionally drained, yes. 327 00:15:20,440 --> 00:15:21,320 Speaker 1: Oh yeah, gird. 328 00:15:21,360 --> 00:15:25,320 Speaker 3: My battery ain't never fool so by the time, like 329 00:15:25,480 --> 00:15:26,640 Speaker 3: my drainage. 330 00:15:26,360 --> 00:15:27,360 Speaker 1: Is like fast. 331 00:15:27,440 --> 00:15:30,160 Speaker 3: It's like you know how your computer when it gets. 332 00:15:30,000 --> 00:15:32,600 Speaker 1: Like older, or your phone, you can't hold the charge. 333 00:15:32,720 --> 00:15:36,720 Speaker 3: I'm there, like the thing, it ain't hold the charge. 334 00:15:36,960 --> 00:15:38,440 Speaker 1: I get out, I go out, and I'm like, y'all 335 00:15:38,480 --> 00:15:41,720 Speaker 1: ready to go, Chris, we just got here. I don't. 336 00:15:41,760 --> 00:15:42,880 Speaker 1: I'm ready. 337 00:15:43,040 --> 00:15:43,800 Speaker 4: I don't wanna be here. 338 00:15:43,960 --> 00:15:48,280 Speaker 1: Mm mm, I don't wanna be here. That's good, friend, right, 339 00:15:49,720 --> 00:15:51,480 Speaker 1: that's it. I got my pictures. They know I was here. 340 00:15:51,480 --> 00:15:51,880 Speaker 1: We're good. 341 00:15:53,240 --> 00:15:56,440 Speaker 3: Mm this is another good one. Bouncing back the art 342 00:15:56,520 --> 00:16:01,280 Speaker 3: of the comeback. Ooh, oh my goodness. Let me think 343 00:16:01,320 --> 00:16:03,200 Speaker 3: of a moment where I had to bounce back. 344 00:16:08,080 --> 00:16:09,240 Speaker 1: I feel like it. 345 00:16:09,160 --> 00:16:11,800 Speaker 3: Would probably be when I first moved to Atlanta from DC, 346 00:16:13,000 --> 00:16:17,760 Speaker 3: going from having a regular paying job, consistent check and 347 00:16:17,800 --> 00:16:22,120 Speaker 3: then moving here and going like flat broke money ran 348 00:16:22,160 --> 00:16:25,680 Speaker 3: out fast. Everything I had saved up ran out, and 349 00:16:25,760 --> 00:16:29,240 Speaker 3: trying to figure it out, and that it was a 350 00:16:29,360 --> 00:16:30,920 Speaker 3: series of years for the comeback. 351 00:16:30,960 --> 00:16:33,240 Speaker 1: It wasn't like a quick season where like bounce back. 352 00:16:34,320 --> 00:16:35,880 Speaker 3: Now you know what I'm saying, Your money can get 353 00:16:35,880 --> 00:16:37,240 Speaker 3: low and then it's like, oh, I know I got this. 354 00:16:37,280 --> 00:16:40,680 Speaker 1: Com boom and boom. But even in that like learning. 355 00:16:40,360 --> 00:16:43,680 Speaker 3: The responsibility of how to manage things, because for me, 356 00:16:44,960 --> 00:16:47,280 Speaker 3: I went from making a good amount of money, you know, 357 00:16:47,320 --> 00:16:50,440 Speaker 3: a great amount of money to like making like a 358 00:16:50,480 --> 00:16:53,640 Speaker 3: lot of money in a very short amount of time 359 00:16:54,200 --> 00:16:58,920 Speaker 3: and not having everything I need to know and having 360 00:16:58,920 --> 00:17:00,880 Speaker 3: to learn really fast how to manage that so that 361 00:17:00,960 --> 00:17:04,200 Speaker 3: like when you do have down seasons, you know, okay, cool, 362 00:17:04,240 --> 00:17:08,199 Speaker 3: like I can I've already managed this properly so that 363 00:17:08,240 --> 00:17:09,560 Speaker 3: when I have a down season, I don't have to 364 00:17:09,560 --> 00:17:11,399 Speaker 3: figure out how to come back. And I think that 365 00:17:11,440 --> 00:17:15,879 Speaker 3: comes with maturity. But it wasn't always like that. So 366 00:17:15,960 --> 00:17:18,159 Speaker 3: that was probably one of the seasons a series of 367 00:17:18,240 --> 00:17:20,600 Speaker 3: years that I would call a season where I had 368 00:17:20,640 --> 00:17:23,280 Speaker 3: to literally fight my way back. 369 00:17:23,320 --> 00:17:24,720 Speaker 1: It wasn't just a quick comeback. 370 00:17:26,800 --> 00:17:31,840 Speaker 3: Let's see what else you got ooh the friend audit 371 00:17:32,400 --> 00:17:34,440 Speaker 3: keeping your circle strong? 372 00:17:35,640 --> 00:17:38,000 Speaker 1: This is really good And this goes with. 373 00:17:38,080 --> 00:17:40,639 Speaker 3: All type like I wanna say, this could be for 374 00:17:40,680 --> 00:17:43,159 Speaker 3: friends and family. You gotta really make sure that the 375 00:17:43,200 --> 00:17:45,920 Speaker 3: people around you serve the season that you are in, 376 00:17:46,000 --> 00:17:48,880 Speaker 3: because if you're around people and you're unequally yoked when 377 00:17:48,880 --> 00:17:50,879 Speaker 3: it comes to where you are in your life, it 378 00:17:50,920 --> 00:17:53,600 Speaker 3: can derail you so fast, you know. And I think 379 00:17:53,640 --> 00:17:56,520 Speaker 3: that for me, where I am in my life now 380 00:17:57,240 --> 00:18:00,280 Speaker 3: and I look around at my friend's circle, we are 381 00:18:00,359 --> 00:18:04,080 Speaker 3: so strong in our faith, in our firm foundation in Christ, 382 00:18:04,240 --> 00:18:07,119 Speaker 3: and it helps me stay focused. If I was running 383 00:18:07,119 --> 00:18:09,479 Speaker 3: around with people that were like still in the streets 384 00:18:09,480 --> 00:18:12,440 Speaker 3: in the club, being promiscuous and doing all these different 385 00:18:12,520 --> 00:18:15,520 Speaker 3: things like not saying that everybody everybody's walk is different, 386 00:18:15,600 --> 00:18:16,320 Speaker 3: let's be very. 387 00:18:16,160 --> 00:18:16,760 Speaker 1: Clear on that. 388 00:18:17,119 --> 00:18:19,239 Speaker 3: But if we're all striving for the same thing, if 389 00:18:19,280 --> 00:18:21,720 Speaker 3: we're all focused and we see each other at church 390 00:18:21,760 --> 00:18:24,800 Speaker 3: on Sundays, you know, like we're all like on that path, 391 00:18:25,280 --> 00:18:26,880 Speaker 3: it it helps. 392 00:18:26,600 --> 00:18:27,320 Speaker 1: With your walks. 393 00:18:27,359 --> 00:18:29,080 Speaker 3: So like when you look at your circle, you kind 394 00:18:29,080 --> 00:18:30,720 Speaker 3: of have to see, like, let's take a little inventory 395 00:18:30,720 --> 00:18:33,280 Speaker 3: and all to where are people in their lives who's 396 00:18:33,320 --> 00:18:35,080 Speaker 3: kind of stagnant right now, and how can we help 397 00:18:35,119 --> 00:18:37,880 Speaker 3: lift them up to where we are, you know, besides 398 00:18:37,960 --> 00:18:41,000 Speaker 3: just throwing people away, but also you have to be 399 00:18:41,040 --> 00:18:44,000 Speaker 3: around people who want that for themselves, you know. So 400 00:18:44,040 --> 00:18:47,919 Speaker 3: I think for me in my journey, it is I 401 00:18:48,000 --> 00:18:51,679 Speaker 3: do probably yearly kind of an otter. Maybe sometimes throughout 402 00:18:51,680 --> 00:18:56,720 Speaker 3: the year you kind of have to be very conscious 403 00:18:56,880 --> 00:18:59,520 Speaker 3: of your surroundings and who you can because you know, 404 00:18:59,560 --> 00:19:00,840 Speaker 3: sometimes you look and be like. 405 00:19:01,040 --> 00:19:03,639 Speaker 1: Wait a minute, why am I why acting like this? 406 00:19:03,840 --> 00:19:05,080 Speaker 1: Like what is that? 407 00:19:05,160 --> 00:19:07,360 Speaker 3: Cause I don't I don't really do this because you 408 00:19:07,440 --> 00:19:09,359 Speaker 3: start to pull you don't realize you are like the 409 00:19:09,359 --> 00:19:11,159 Speaker 3: people that you hang around the most. So like if 410 00:19:11,160 --> 00:19:12,960 Speaker 3: you guys like to cussin is like a sailor and 411 00:19:12,960 --> 00:19:15,880 Speaker 3: you're trying to stop cussing, You'll find yourself. 412 00:19:15,600 --> 00:19:17,000 Speaker 1: Like, wait, why am I cussing all the time. 413 00:19:17,040 --> 00:19:20,840 Speaker 3: It's like, oh, like okay, now I gotta talk to 414 00:19:20,840 --> 00:19:22,920 Speaker 3: my friend Hayber, like you gotta chill out cause I'm 415 00:19:22,960 --> 00:19:25,240 Speaker 3: really working on this and I'm starting to pick it up. 416 00:19:25,280 --> 00:19:27,440 Speaker 3: It's like a kid, you know, like you you got 417 00:19:27,480 --> 00:19:31,560 Speaker 3: a kid who like absorbs everything, and then you're like 418 00:19:31,560 --> 00:19:33,000 Speaker 3: where they get that from? Oh I got it from 419 00:19:33,000 --> 00:19:34,880 Speaker 3: a mama, you know. So it's like the same thing. 420 00:19:34,960 --> 00:19:38,240 Speaker 3: We we are constantly absorbing things. So I think the 421 00:19:38,320 --> 00:19:41,639 Speaker 3: friend audit is very very important, especially when it comes 422 00:19:41,640 --> 00:19:46,359 Speaker 3: to just evolving in life, you know. For me, even 423 00:19:46,440 --> 00:19:50,760 Speaker 3: with attaining fame and trying to figure out how to 424 00:19:50,880 --> 00:19:54,360 Speaker 3: navigate it, I've noticed that my friends I have even 425 00:19:54,400 --> 00:19:57,760 Speaker 3: had to kind of shift and even kind of elevate 426 00:19:57,840 --> 00:20:01,400 Speaker 3: and grow because they are around me. They're like, dang, 427 00:20:01,440 --> 00:20:03,359 Speaker 3: we realize, like we can't move how we used to 428 00:20:03,440 --> 00:20:07,600 Speaker 3: move because of you. And sometimes it can be a 429 00:20:07,640 --> 00:20:11,760 Speaker 3: heavy thing to carry when you're not the one that 430 00:20:11,880 --> 00:20:14,400 Speaker 3: has to bear that, you know, Like for me, it's 431 00:20:14,480 --> 00:20:16,160 Speaker 3: like it's a part of it, you know. But when 432 00:20:16,160 --> 00:20:18,800 Speaker 3: you're just attached to me and somebody who's just an 433 00:20:18,800 --> 00:20:21,400 Speaker 3: innocent bystander where they have to kind of shift too, 434 00:20:21,800 --> 00:20:24,600 Speaker 3: sometimes they don't understand why they have to shift or 435 00:20:24,600 --> 00:20:26,920 Speaker 3: even understand the importance of it because they're not living it. 436 00:20:27,160 --> 00:20:28,960 Speaker 3: But then other people that I'm around, they're like, no, 437 00:20:29,080 --> 00:20:31,159 Speaker 3: I get it, and I'm willing, you know what I'm saying, Like, 438 00:20:31,200 --> 00:20:33,560 Speaker 3: since I see, like I understand where you are and 439 00:20:33,600 --> 00:20:35,520 Speaker 3: where you're going, and I want to go too, and 440 00:20:35,560 --> 00:20:38,080 Speaker 3: I want to grow in my areas and I would 441 00:20:38,080 --> 00:20:40,000 Speaker 3: love to be around you because it inspires me. 442 00:20:40,440 --> 00:20:41,760 Speaker 1: But like when you have people. 443 00:20:41,560 --> 00:20:44,959 Speaker 3: Who aren't really quite there yet, you have to decide 444 00:20:45,000 --> 00:20:47,639 Speaker 3: when it's time to sever those ties or you know, 445 00:20:47,680 --> 00:20:50,360 Speaker 3: I feel like the saying that people are in your 446 00:20:50,359 --> 00:20:52,159 Speaker 3: life who are a reason in a season or a 447 00:20:52,200 --> 00:20:54,639 Speaker 3: lifetime is so true and you have to be okay 448 00:20:54,680 --> 00:20:56,560 Speaker 3: with that. You know, we want to hold on the 449 00:20:56,640 --> 00:21:00,000 Speaker 3: people and hold them tight forever. And that's not everybody 450 00:21:00,119 --> 00:21:02,439 Speaker 3: position in your life. And you have to understand that. 451 00:21:02,520 --> 00:21:04,480 Speaker 3: And that doesn't mean that you don't love me any less, 452 00:21:04,560 --> 00:21:07,440 Speaker 3: that they're not in your prayers, or that they can't call. 453 00:21:07,240 --> 00:21:08,880 Speaker 1: You if they need you for anything. 454 00:21:09,240 --> 00:21:11,800 Speaker 3: But some people just can't stay that close to you 455 00:21:11,880 --> 00:21:13,959 Speaker 3: all the time, you know, depending on where you are 456 00:21:13,960 --> 00:21:14,480 Speaker 3: in your life. 457 00:21:14,520 --> 00:21:17,240 Speaker 1: So the friend ought it is important. 458 00:21:17,560 --> 00:21:19,879 Speaker 3: Make sure you guys do that and check your circle. 459 00:21:19,880 --> 00:21:25,240 Speaker 3: You gotta keep it strong. Mm this is a good one. 460 00:21:25,880 --> 00:21:33,240 Speaker 1: Would you date you? Ooh ooh, that's so good. 461 00:21:34,280 --> 00:21:40,919 Speaker 3: Oh my goodness, wow, what I date me? I? I mean, 462 00:21:40,960 --> 00:21:43,439 Speaker 3: of course I would date me, But there are some 463 00:21:43,600 --> 00:21:45,639 Speaker 3: things when you ask me that, I'm like, there's some 464 00:21:45,680 --> 00:21:46,720 Speaker 3: things I need to work on. 465 00:21:47,800 --> 00:21:53,040 Speaker 1: I have like a like, I like the I like 466 00:21:53,119 --> 00:21:54,680 Speaker 1: things the way I like it, you. 467 00:21:54,600 --> 00:21:56,840 Speaker 3: Know, and I can when you've been by yourself for 468 00:21:56,840 --> 00:22:01,640 Speaker 3: so long, you have cultivated a way of life. You've 469 00:22:01,640 --> 00:22:04,840 Speaker 3: cultivated your patterns and the way you like to do things, 470 00:22:05,440 --> 00:22:07,840 Speaker 3: and sometimes it's hard. 471 00:22:07,600 --> 00:22:10,159 Speaker 1: To like shift those things when you're so stuck in 472 00:22:10,200 --> 00:22:10,840 Speaker 1: your ways. 473 00:22:11,680 --> 00:22:14,280 Speaker 3: So I know, for me, like when it comes to 474 00:22:14,560 --> 00:22:17,600 Speaker 3: dating me, if I was to date myself, those are 475 00:22:17,640 --> 00:22:19,280 Speaker 3: some things that this is good cause it's kind of 476 00:22:19,280 --> 00:22:21,800 Speaker 3: a little self reflection that I would need to work on, 477 00:22:21,960 --> 00:22:25,240 Speaker 3: like you know, being more like water, you know. You 478 00:22:25,280 --> 00:22:27,200 Speaker 3: know what I'm saying, Like if if I'm with somebody, 479 00:22:27,280 --> 00:22:29,240 Speaker 3: I want us to flow. You know, it doesn't have 480 00:22:29,280 --> 00:22:30,240 Speaker 3: to always be my way. 481 00:22:30,840 --> 00:22:32,080 Speaker 1: That's something I need to work on. 482 00:22:34,400 --> 00:22:36,679 Speaker 3: I think something else I would work on if I 483 00:22:36,840 --> 00:22:44,600 Speaker 3: was to date myself, would be wanting, oh, you know what, 484 00:22:44,840 --> 00:22:48,480 Speaker 3: if I was to date myself, I would also tell 485 00:22:48,560 --> 00:22:52,119 Speaker 3: Crystal to work on making sure that you give people 486 00:22:52,160 --> 00:22:52,960 Speaker 3: the grace that. 487 00:22:52,840 --> 00:22:55,240 Speaker 1: You want people to give you. 488 00:22:55,600 --> 00:23:00,000 Speaker 3: A lot of times we want people to come exactly 489 00:23:00,240 --> 00:23:01,600 Speaker 3: how we want them to come, you know, And. 490 00:23:01,600 --> 00:23:05,960 Speaker 1: I struggle with this myself, Like you have this list. 491 00:23:05,760 --> 00:23:09,080 Speaker 3: Of things, like I want somebody who is on the 492 00:23:09,119 --> 00:23:11,800 Speaker 3: same page as me spiritually, Like I want somebody. 493 00:23:11,480 --> 00:23:13,040 Speaker 1: Who's taken their walk with God. 494 00:23:13,160 --> 00:23:15,679 Speaker 3: Seriously, I want somebody who's got their stuff together. You know, 495 00:23:15,800 --> 00:23:18,720 Speaker 3: I want somebody who has this at least makes this 496 00:23:18,800 --> 00:23:20,320 Speaker 3: amount of money. You know, they don't have to make 497 00:23:20,320 --> 00:23:21,600 Speaker 3: the same amount. You have the list, you know what 498 00:23:21,600 --> 00:23:23,960 Speaker 3: I'm saying. Whatever your list is, we all have it. 499 00:23:24,800 --> 00:23:28,960 Speaker 3: And I think we have to understand that sometimes when 500 00:23:29,000 --> 00:23:32,800 Speaker 3: we put those limitations on people, we also block our 501 00:23:32,840 --> 00:23:36,360 Speaker 3: blessing of an amazing person. So I would definitely say, 502 00:23:36,480 --> 00:23:39,720 Speaker 3: learn to give grace more and kind of you know 503 00:23:39,720 --> 00:23:42,879 Speaker 3: what I'm saying, you can have your non negotiables, but 504 00:23:43,000 --> 00:23:45,080 Speaker 3: kind of throw the list away because sometimes the list 505 00:23:45,320 --> 00:23:47,240 Speaker 3: is just it's not realistic. 506 00:23:47,720 --> 00:23:50,400 Speaker 1: So I would do that, and then what else? 507 00:23:50,440 --> 00:23:53,760 Speaker 3: I think everything else, like I would keep you know, 508 00:23:53,840 --> 00:23:56,840 Speaker 3: like I'm a good time, Like I'm well traveled, so 509 00:23:56,880 --> 00:23:59,320 Speaker 3: I know a lot of things. I can introduce you 510 00:23:59,359 --> 00:24:02,000 Speaker 3: to different things, and. 511 00:24:03,680 --> 00:24:08,760 Speaker 1: I'm fun. I yeah, everything else, I'm good. 512 00:24:08,760 --> 00:24:10,359 Speaker 3: Those are a few things I need that control and 513 00:24:10,400 --> 00:24:12,199 Speaker 3: that grace I need to work on. 514 00:24:12,920 --> 00:24:16,560 Speaker 1: But other than that, yeah, I would take myself. I 515 00:24:16,560 --> 00:24:18,640 Speaker 1: would let's see. 516 00:24:18,520 --> 00:24:23,720 Speaker 3: What else, no more pick me energy, standing firm in 517 00:24:23,920 --> 00:24:24,639 Speaker 3: your worth. 518 00:24:25,040 --> 00:24:27,320 Speaker 1: I am their honey. I mm mm. 519 00:24:27,359 --> 00:24:29,119 Speaker 3: I used to be the girl I just had to 520 00:24:29,160 --> 00:24:30,120 Speaker 3: be in a relationship. 521 00:24:30,359 --> 00:24:33,480 Speaker 1: Please pick me? Please not anymore. 522 00:24:33,840 --> 00:24:36,920 Speaker 3: No, listen, I'm very open cause I did go through 523 00:24:36,920 --> 00:24:40,680 Speaker 3: a phase of my life where I just was very 524 00:24:40,720 --> 00:24:44,280 Speaker 3: closed minded and wasn't putting myself out there to meet anyone. 525 00:24:44,800 --> 00:24:48,720 Speaker 3: Now I'm very open minded. I've grown and mature in 526 00:24:48,800 --> 00:24:51,560 Speaker 3: the things that I wanted a man. But as far 527 00:24:51,600 --> 00:24:54,760 Speaker 3: as being desperate and like please pick me, like I, 528 00:24:54,760 --> 00:24:56,960 Speaker 3: I just I want to be a relationship so bad. 529 00:24:57,920 --> 00:25:00,639 Speaker 1: No, those days are over. I'm I'm not the girl anymore. 530 00:25:00,680 --> 00:25:02,200 Speaker 3: And I thank God that I have been delivered from 531 00:25:02,200 --> 00:25:04,840 Speaker 3: that because a lot of times when you had that 532 00:25:04,880 --> 00:25:07,520 Speaker 3: picked me energy, you are willing to do anything and 533 00:25:07,600 --> 00:25:12,399 Speaker 3: it turns into only how can I serve you? And 534 00:25:12,440 --> 00:25:15,159 Speaker 3: then the person's not reciprocated on the other end. But 535 00:25:15,160 --> 00:25:18,399 Speaker 3: when you have values and standards, you come to the 536 00:25:18,480 --> 00:25:21,439 Speaker 3: table with the man understanding from the jump, Oh. 537 00:25:21,359 --> 00:25:22,639 Speaker 1: This is how I have to approach her. 538 00:25:22,720 --> 00:25:24,800 Speaker 3: Oh these are the things that she needs and demands 539 00:25:24,800 --> 00:25:27,159 Speaker 3: in a relationship. And I think when you entered in 540 00:25:27,160 --> 00:25:29,920 Speaker 3: that way, it sets the tone for what you need. 541 00:25:29,960 --> 00:25:32,520 Speaker 3: And also you're open as a woman to give the 542 00:25:32,560 --> 00:25:35,280 Speaker 3: man what he needs, and it's not a one sided relationship. 543 00:25:35,600 --> 00:25:38,480 Speaker 3: But I think a lot of times as we get older, 544 00:25:38,600 --> 00:25:40,520 Speaker 3: for me, it was I had to phase in my 545 00:25:40,560 --> 00:25:42,720 Speaker 3: life as I was getting older and I wasn't settled 546 00:25:42,720 --> 00:25:45,879 Speaker 3: down yet that I did have that energy where I 547 00:25:46,000 --> 00:25:48,440 Speaker 3: just wanted someone to pick me like I was ready. 548 00:25:48,440 --> 00:25:50,080 Speaker 3: And I think a lot of times I settled in 549 00:25:50,119 --> 00:25:53,560 Speaker 3: relationships because of that energy, and I was with people 550 00:25:53,640 --> 00:25:56,639 Speaker 3: that God had not designed for me and that he 551 00:25:56,680 --> 00:25:59,280 Speaker 3: hadn't chosen for me. But I was so eager to 552 00:25:59,320 --> 00:26:02,439 Speaker 3: be in a relationship and just be chosen. And you know, 553 00:26:02,680 --> 00:26:04,760 Speaker 3: like you want that, you know, like we can't see it, 554 00:26:04,920 --> 00:26:07,280 Speaker 3: like I don't care. No, you want those things, but 555 00:26:07,359 --> 00:26:09,480 Speaker 3: you wanted to be with the person that God chose 556 00:26:09,560 --> 00:26:15,119 Speaker 3: for you. So that's my take on that plot twists 557 00:26:15,200 --> 00:26:20,240 Speaker 3: and pivots when life doesn't go as planned. All right, guys, 558 00:26:20,280 --> 00:26:23,479 Speaker 3: I am working on this because I work so hard 559 00:26:23,600 --> 00:26:25,920 Speaker 3: to plan things, and this is where the control comes 560 00:26:25,920 --> 00:26:26,399 Speaker 3: back into. 561 00:26:28,119 --> 00:26:30,000 Speaker 1: It's hard for me sometimes. 562 00:26:29,480 --> 00:26:31,679 Speaker 3: To immediately go into the all right, what are we 563 00:26:31,680 --> 00:26:36,600 Speaker 3: gonna do? Let's pivot, you know, I because when you 564 00:26:36,840 --> 00:26:40,440 Speaker 3: like so structured and you you plan everything to a t, 565 00:26:40,880 --> 00:26:45,480 Speaker 3: like you want things to go right, and sometimes depending 566 00:26:45,480 --> 00:26:48,640 Speaker 3: on if i'm PMS and I'm super aggy or if 567 00:26:48,640 --> 00:26:50,439 Speaker 3: I'm in that space like all right, it's fine, like 568 00:26:50,680 --> 00:26:53,160 Speaker 3: what are we gonna do? For the most part, i'ma 569 00:26:53,320 --> 00:26:55,399 Speaker 3: it's fine, what we're gonna do. But there's another like 570 00:26:56,160 --> 00:26:59,239 Speaker 3: I would say, forty nine percent of the time, I'm like, 571 00:26:59,560 --> 00:27:01,920 Speaker 3: all right, what we're gonna do? The other fifty one 572 00:27:01,920 --> 00:27:06,000 Speaker 3: percent of the time, I'm like, why is this not 573 00:27:06,040 --> 00:27:09,640 Speaker 3: going the way we planned it? And that just that's 574 00:27:09,680 --> 00:27:11,760 Speaker 3: not how life works. You know, life is going to 575 00:27:11,800 --> 00:27:14,280 Speaker 3: give you pivots, and that's something that I have to 576 00:27:14,359 --> 00:27:17,920 Speaker 3: work on to make sure that when those moments, those 577 00:27:17,920 --> 00:27:21,440 Speaker 3: plot twists happen, those moments occurred that I just say, 578 00:27:21,480 --> 00:27:22,840 Speaker 3: you know what, this is beyond my control. 579 00:27:23,160 --> 00:27:24,119 Speaker 1: How can we fix it? 580 00:27:24,680 --> 00:27:27,320 Speaker 3: If I was to give you an example of a 581 00:27:27,440 --> 00:27:34,960 Speaker 3: plot twist that I've had to bounce back from, Let's see, 582 00:27:36,880 --> 00:27:38,800 Speaker 3: besides the New York Fashion Week moment where I had 583 00:27:38,840 --> 00:27:42,040 Speaker 3: to we had to figure out what to do within 584 00:27:42,160 --> 00:27:46,120 Speaker 3: like three hours my very first fashion week, my day 585 00:27:46,119 --> 00:27:49,560 Speaker 3: one closed, left in Atlanta having to figure it out. 586 00:27:50,359 --> 00:27:51,959 Speaker 3: And that was when I tell y'all, that was like 587 00:27:52,000 --> 00:27:53,960 Speaker 3: one of the worst weeks. And I use the word 588 00:27:54,040 --> 00:27:57,639 Speaker 3: worse very loosely. Uh. We had just dropped the live show, 589 00:27:57,880 --> 00:28:01,400 Speaker 3: and I promise you like and every single day something 590 00:28:01,480 --> 00:28:03,879 Speaker 3: was going wrong. You know, the tickets were selling, but 591 00:28:04,280 --> 00:28:07,120 Speaker 3: I have my sweeties on Patreon, where there's certain things 592 00:28:07,119 --> 00:28:08,080 Speaker 3: that are supposed to go to them. 593 00:28:08,119 --> 00:28:09,240 Speaker 1: First things were. 594 00:28:09,160 --> 00:28:12,359 Speaker 3: Being leaked that wasn't getting to them, and I'm telling 595 00:28:12,359 --> 00:28:14,560 Speaker 3: them one thing and I'm confirming with my team, and 596 00:28:14,600 --> 00:28:17,640 Speaker 3: then other things that happened that's beyond their control. They've 597 00:28:17,640 --> 00:28:21,280 Speaker 3: sent explicit destructions on how this works in the chrystal 598 00:28:21,359 --> 00:28:23,520 Speaker 3: in a world. I'm just like, what is happening? Like, 599 00:28:23,560 --> 00:28:27,520 Speaker 3: why is nothing going right? And I feel like every 600 00:28:27,600 --> 00:28:29,760 Speaker 3: day that week in my my swedies can attest like 601 00:28:29,920 --> 00:28:35,160 Speaker 3: every day that week it was something. And then that Friday, 602 00:28:35,200 --> 00:28:37,280 Speaker 3: we get to New York, we Land and the guy 603 00:28:37,400 --> 00:28:39,360 Speaker 3: was like, alright, we got six bags. I'm but I'm 604 00:28:39,400 --> 00:28:43,640 Speaker 3: seeing a seventh bag in the queue, but it's not here, 605 00:28:43,680 --> 00:28:47,920 Speaker 3: And I'm like, what what what? 606 00:28:48,360 --> 00:28:51,000 Speaker 1: No, No, it's gotta be there. 607 00:28:51,440 --> 00:28:53,040 Speaker 3: We were at the airport an hour and a half 608 00:28:53,080 --> 00:28:57,040 Speaker 3: before we left. I paid extra for Delta VIP. Why 609 00:28:57,080 --> 00:28:59,480 Speaker 3: is my bag not on this plane? And they were like, 610 00:28:59,480 --> 00:29:02,360 Speaker 3: ma'am I have no idea, but we appreciate your dibbind 611 00:29:02,360 --> 00:29:03,120 Speaker 3: medallion's dadus. 612 00:29:03,160 --> 00:29:06,400 Speaker 1: We're gonna figure it out. And shout out Delta cause 613 00:29:06,440 --> 00:29:08,640 Speaker 1: y'all did figure it out. I appreciate y'all. 614 00:29:09,000 --> 00:29:10,640 Speaker 3: But it was one of those moments where I had 615 00:29:10,640 --> 00:29:12,320 Speaker 3: to pivot and you think about it like this is 616 00:29:12,320 --> 00:29:14,840 Speaker 3: a dream come true, Like I'm getting to do my 617 00:29:14,880 --> 00:29:15,680 Speaker 3: first New. 618 00:29:15,560 --> 00:29:18,440 Speaker 1: York Fashion Week and my clothes don't make it. That 619 00:29:18,520 --> 00:29:20,680 Speaker 1: was a moment. Shout out of Shauna, who she was. 620 00:29:20,640 --> 00:29:22,960 Speaker 3: So calm, and she's like it's okay, cause like a 621 00:29:23,040 --> 00:29:24,960 Speaker 3: year or two before the same thing happened to her 622 00:29:25,000 --> 00:29:27,120 Speaker 3: when she went to Paris Fashion Week, so she knew 623 00:29:27,160 --> 00:29:27,719 Speaker 3: how to pivot. 624 00:29:27,960 --> 00:29:28,960 Speaker 1: So I'm grateful for that. 625 00:29:29,720 --> 00:29:33,000 Speaker 3: Another situation in my life where I had to pivot 626 00:29:33,040 --> 00:29:41,600 Speaker 3: would probably be m on set. Okay, let's take to 627 00:29:41,640 --> 00:29:46,360 Speaker 3: set work. We're on set. We're moving ninety miles a minute, 628 00:29:46,560 --> 00:29:52,719 Speaker 3: super fast. It's a very intense. Herman, you can attest 629 00:29:52,720 --> 00:29:56,360 Speaker 3: to this, how fast we move at tps, very intense, 630 00:29:57,640 --> 00:29:58,800 Speaker 3: the speed of lightning. 631 00:29:58,920 --> 00:29:59,959 Speaker 1: And you've gone through it. 632 00:30:00,000 --> 00:30:03,040 Speaker 3: You're every single look and you know, okay for this outfit. 633 00:30:03,080 --> 00:30:06,400 Speaker 3: If I'm gonna be in this outfit for two weeks, baby, this. 634 00:30:06,480 --> 00:30:08,920 Speaker 1: The one Yeah, and you. 635 00:30:08,840 --> 00:30:11,120 Speaker 3: Get in their dressing room and that's the wrong outfit, 636 00:30:11,120 --> 00:30:13,040 Speaker 3: and it's you're like, you know what I'm saying, not 637 00:30:13,160 --> 00:30:16,400 Speaker 3: your most favorite outfit, and you gotta word and you're like, 638 00:30:16,480 --> 00:30:20,920 Speaker 3: I gotta be in this for two weeks and they 639 00:30:20,920 --> 00:30:23,280 Speaker 3: don't have time to get the outfit from the dream building, 640 00:30:24,200 --> 00:30:26,520 Speaker 3: you know what I'm saying. That's a moment where it's 641 00:30:26,560 --> 00:30:29,120 Speaker 3: like you just gotta swallow it and pivot and be like, 642 00:30:29,120 --> 00:30:31,560 Speaker 3: all right, I just gotta wear this outfit. 643 00:30:31,400 --> 00:30:32,280 Speaker 1: Gotta make it work. 644 00:30:32,600 --> 00:30:36,400 Speaker 3: And it's because you do, like take your character so seriously, 645 00:30:36,520 --> 00:30:38,880 Speaker 3: and you know the clothes that you just cause there's 646 00:30:38,880 --> 00:30:41,280 Speaker 3: certain pieces that just hit you know, and you want 647 00:30:41,320 --> 00:30:43,680 Speaker 3: to wear that piece the longest, and that's happened a 648 00:30:43,720 --> 00:30:45,480 Speaker 3: few times. But then you also have to understand the 649 00:30:45,480 --> 00:30:48,080 Speaker 3: culture and how fast we're moving where you gotta give grace. 650 00:30:48,120 --> 00:30:50,680 Speaker 3: That's where grace has to be extended and it's like, Okay, 651 00:30:50,680 --> 00:30:53,880 Speaker 3: we're not saving lives here, it's nothing to do the world, Like. 652 00:30:54,120 --> 00:30:57,000 Speaker 1: It's just an outfit, but it's the outfit. 653 00:30:57,320 --> 00:30:59,640 Speaker 3: So that's another moment of like, I feel like we're 654 00:30:59,640 --> 00:31:02,960 Speaker 3: having to to pivot and make things work. 655 00:31:04,080 --> 00:31:05,120 Speaker 1: Yeah, what about you? 656 00:31:05,120 --> 00:31:07,760 Speaker 3: Has there any many moments in your life where you 657 00:31:07,760 --> 00:31:10,040 Speaker 3: had to, like where God threw you apply to us 658 00:31:10,040 --> 00:31:10,840 Speaker 3: and you had to pivot. 659 00:31:16,120 --> 00:31:23,200 Speaker 5: God's throwing so many, so many tools for me to pivot. 660 00:31:23,440 --> 00:31:28,360 Speaker 5: I'm not gonna name one specifically, okay, but earlier when 661 00:31:28,360 --> 00:31:32,960 Speaker 5: I was prepping your wardrobe for today and I was 662 00:31:33,000 --> 00:31:36,240 Speaker 5: doing all of these things, I was saying to myself, 663 00:31:38,360 --> 00:31:44,480 Speaker 5: you know, TPS Tylersburg Studios prepared me for this for 664 00:31:44,640 --> 00:31:48,600 Speaker 5: so many things because you have to you have to 665 00:31:48,640 --> 00:31:52,080 Speaker 5: be able to wear so many hats, and you have 666 00:31:52,200 --> 00:31:55,720 Speaker 5: to adjust that you have to move at the speed 667 00:31:55,720 --> 00:31:59,600 Speaker 5: of lightening. But at the same time you have to 668 00:31:59,600 --> 00:32:02,320 Speaker 5: be like perfect because you can't mess up. 669 00:32:02,360 --> 00:32:03,640 Speaker 1: Oh my gosh. 670 00:32:04,080 --> 00:32:06,760 Speaker 4: And I was grateful for that journey. 671 00:32:07,200 --> 00:32:11,920 Speaker 1: Disappointed. Oh I love that. That is so true. 672 00:32:11,960 --> 00:32:17,640 Speaker 3: Like when I think about our time at TPS, and like, man, 673 00:32:17,880 --> 00:32:20,160 Speaker 3: w if we had done like a reality show member 674 00:32:20,200 --> 00:32:22,280 Speaker 3: at one point they were like doing a show that 675 00:32:22,560 --> 00:32:25,280 Speaker 3: during COVID if they had a air like to see 676 00:32:25,360 --> 00:32:28,800 Speaker 3: that's the real show. The real show is behind the scenes, y'all. 677 00:32:29,360 --> 00:32:31,640 Speaker 3: And like seeing how we pivot and if you take 678 00:32:31,680 --> 00:32:33,200 Speaker 3: that and apply it to real life. 679 00:32:33,520 --> 00:32:33,640 Speaker 1: There. 680 00:32:33,800 --> 00:32:35,760 Speaker 3: There are so many life lessons that we learned through 681 00:32:35,760 --> 00:32:40,080 Speaker 3: work there, and I think one thing up, there's many 682 00:32:40,120 --> 00:32:42,720 Speaker 3: things that I'm grateful for Tyler for, but his work 683 00:32:42,760 --> 00:32:47,440 Speaker 3: ethic and how he pushed us and stretched us and 684 00:32:47,840 --> 00:32:50,600 Speaker 3: like it was like the pressure of diamonds being made. 685 00:32:50,640 --> 00:32:52,040 Speaker 1: We were diamonds in the rough there. 686 00:32:53,160 --> 00:32:56,480 Speaker 5: Like you said, it feels like we are saving lives. 687 00:32:56,720 --> 00:32:58,560 Speaker 1: No, and he has your mind, he set we're not. 688 00:32:59,000 --> 00:33:02,040 Speaker 4: Yeah, there's a lot of money on the line. 689 00:33:01,680 --> 00:33:02,200 Speaker 1: A lot of. 690 00:33:03,680 --> 00:33:07,040 Speaker 3: How much money was something crazy crazy crazy amounts like 691 00:33:07,120 --> 00:33:08,440 Speaker 3: money every second? 692 00:33:08,880 --> 00:33:10,959 Speaker 2: Like a lot of money, admitute a seconds. 693 00:33:11,440 --> 00:33:15,160 Speaker 1: Yeah, when he breaks it down, you'll be like, we 694 00:33:15,320 --> 00:33:19,200 Speaker 1: got it. Sorry, No, that's so true. I love that. 695 00:33:19,280 --> 00:33:23,840 Speaker 1: Thank you for timing and Herman. All right, I think 696 00:33:23,920 --> 00:33:25,120 Speaker 1: that's good. That's it. 697 00:33:25,160 --> 00:33:25,720 Speaker 3: That was good. 698 00:33:25,840 --> 00:33:28,840 Speaker 1: I like this, Dria, thank you for this idea for 699 00:33:28,880 --> 00:33:30,840 Speaker 1: this solo episode. I loved it. 700 00:33:34,560 --> 00:33:36,560 Speaker 3: All right, guys, thank you so much for tuning into 701 00:33:36,640 --> 00:33:38,720 Speaker 3: this episode of the Keep It Positive Sweetish Show. 702 00:33:39,040 --> 00:33:40,479 Speaker 1: I'm your host, Christopher A. Hayeselick. 703 00:33:40,560 --> 00:33:43,400 Speaker 3: You guys can follow me on all social media platforms. 704 00:33:42,960 --> 00:33:44,320 Speaker 1: At Love Chris Doorinee. 705 00:33:44,440 --> 00:33:46,920 Speaker 3: You can also follow our show at keep it Positive, 706 00:33:46,880 --> 00:33:49,560 Speaker 3: Sweetie and that's sweety with an ie. You can write 707 00:33:49,560 --> 00:33:52,560 Speaker 3: into our positive Outcomes listening letter at keep it Positive 708 00:33:52,560 --> 00:33:56,120 Speaker 3: Sweete at gmail dot com. In the meantime, in between time, 709 00:33:56,400 --> 00:33:57,160 Speaker 3: you already. 710 00:33:56,880 --> 00:33:58,760 Speaker 1: Know what to do. Keep it positive, Sweeties,