1 00:00:02,759 --> 00:00:06,680 Speaker 1: Welcome back to Family Therapy. I'm Elliot Connie, and this 2 00:00:06,800 --> 00:00:09,800 Speaker 1: is season two of Family Therapy. We have a new 3 00:00:09,840 --> 00:00:12,879 Speaker 1: family joining us this season. I think I would describe 4 00:00:12,880 --> 00:00:19,119 Speaker 1: as family as being without an anchor, and a really 5 00:00:19,160 --> 00:00:25,840 Speaker 1: really healthy family will we'll have something of a matriarch 6 00:00:26,040 --> 00:00:30,000 Speaker 1: or a patriarch that brings a family together for family 7 00:00:30,080 --> 00:00:34,000 Speaker 1: routines and family events, like for example, you might have 8 00:00:34,120 --> 00:00:38,840 Speaker 1: like a grandmother and everybody everybody congregates there for Christmas, 9 00:00:39,280 --> 00:00:43,400 Speaker 1: or you might have a grandfather and everybody congregates there 10 00:00:43,520 --> 00:00:47,680 Speaker 1: for a July fourth celebration, or maybe one of the 11 00:00:48,800 --> 00:00:51,760 Speaker 1: fathers or aunts and uncles. But there's there's something that 12 00:00:51,800 --> 00:00:55,080 Speaker 1: becomes like the center point or the anchor of the 13 00:00:55,160 --> 00:00:59,960 Speaker 1: family that causes the family to reconnect and stay connected. 14 00:01:00,800 --> 00:01:02,920 Speaker 1: And I think the best way I'd describe this family 15 00:01:03,120 --> 00:01:08,680 Speaker 1: as being without those anchor points and you have people 16 00:01:09,840 --> 00:01:12,480 Speaker 1: that it's almost like we love each other, but we 17 00:01:12,520 --> 00:01:16,240 Speaker 1: don't know how to build a routine that includes one another. 18 00:01:17,160 --> 00:01:22,480 Speaker 1: And I think that started early on from the father 19 00:01:22,800 --> 00:01:26,120 Speaker 1: of the adult children that will be featured in this season, 20 00:01:27,280 --> 00:01:32,200 Speaker 1: because the family was very disconnected almost from the very beginning. 21 00:01:33,200 --> 00:01:37,800 Speaker 1: This family never really learned how to build routines and relationships. 22 00:01:38,440 --> 00:01:45,440 Speaker 1: And I think this was a journey of not just reconnecting, 23 00:01:46,959 --> 00:01:52,280 Speaker 1: but in the reconnection, learning how to build habits and 24 00:01:52,400 --> 00:01:55,640 Speaker 1: routines that sustain the reconnection. 25 00:02:04,240 --> 00:02:09,560 Speaker 2: Jaman, this is my sister, my brother, my nephew. I 26 00:02:09,600 --> 00:02:12,919 Speaker 2: begged for them to be here, so I'm truly grateful. 27 00:02:13,440 --> 00:02:17,919 Speaker 2: I'm the youngest on my dad's side. They're the oldest. 28 00:02:19,320 --> 00:02:22,480 Speaker 3: Hi, my name is Gladys. I'm super excited to be 29 00:02:22,600 --> 00:02:27,720 Speaker 3: here with my family. I am my father's second eldest 30 00:02:28,720 --> 00:02:35,280 Speaker 3: of the girls, so I'm just really grateful for this opportunity. 31 00:02:35,320 --> 00:02:39,040 Speaker 3: I'm so happy. When Jasmine told me and I was like, yeah, 32 00:02:39,120 --> 00:02:42,720 Speaker 3: I was really excited to even hear that I had joined. 33 00:02:42,760 --> 00:02:45,840 Speaker 3: And I was like, all right, Auntie, all right, gathering 34 00:02:46,000 --> 00:02:46,639 Speaker 3: us all up. 35 00:02:46,720 --> 00:02:49,560 Speaker 4: I see, I'm the oldest from my father. 36 00:02:49,840 --> 00:02:53,959 Speaker 5: I'm Chris, so I was the and I don't know 37 00:02:54,000 --> 00:02:56,360 Speaker 5: if I'm the last one to be found. We have 38 00:02:56,400 --> 00:02:59,160 Speaker 5: a mystery sibling, so we don't know yet. We have 39 00:02:59,200 --> 00:03:02,000 Speaker 5: a mystery sibling out there, so it might be the 40 00:03:02,040 --> 00:03:06,760 Speaker 5: second to last. But it was wild for the founder. 41 00:03:07,240 --> 00:03:10,400 Speaker 1: Wow, Okay, how long how long has it been since 42 00:03:10,400 --> 00:03:11,440 Speaker 1: you've been found Chris. 43 00:03:11,880 --> 00:03:14,400 Speaker 5: Well, shoot, almost like twenty years. I was in my 44 00:03:14,440 --> 00:03:18,200 Speaker 5: mid thirties, so I'm like fifty two getting up there. 45 00:03:18,800 --> 00:03:21,840 Speaker 4: But but yeah, twenty years. 46 00:03:22,240 --> 00:03:26,040 Speaker 6: Hey, yeah, I'm going by Elisha, and I guess I'm 47 00:03:26,080 --> 00:03:28,560 Speaker 6: the odd one out because I don't have any siblings. 48 00:03:28,720 --> 00:03:32,919 Speaker 6: So yeah, I am what's it called twenty two years old? Now? 49 00:03:33,040 --> 00:03:35,520 Speaker 6: Just turned twenty two a couple of months ago, and 50 00:03:35,960 --> 00:03:39,480 Speaker 6: you know, Auntie Jasmine came here and asked me to join. 51 00:03:39,760 --> 00:03:42,480 Speaker 6: At first I was a bit skeptical, but after learning 52 00:03:42,480 --> 00:03:44,600 Speaker 6: I can you know, have being more non ins I 53 00:03:44,600 --> 00:03:46,520 Speaker 6: was like, oh, okay, I'm fine, coming on. 54 00:03:46,760 --> 00:03:50,320 Speaker 1: I love it. And so you know you're not one 55 00:03:50,320 --> 00:03:53,320 Speaker 1: of their siblings, So what is your familial connection? 56 00:03:53,640 --> 00:03:56,800 Speaker 6: Gladys is my mom and uncle Chris is my uncle. 57 00:04:00,080 --> 00:04:04,880 Speaker 1: Elijah is a young man on a journey of authenticity that, 58 00:04:05,000 --> 00:04:08,800 Speaker 1: for one reason or another, some things have happened along 59 00:04:08,880 --> 00:04:10,720 Speaker 1: his journey that make it hard for him to be 60 00:04:10,840 --> 00:04:13,160 Speaker 1: his authentic self. It makes it hard for him to 61 00:04:13,200 --> 00:04:16,720 Speaker 1: express his wants, needs, emotions, especially when those emotions might 62 00:04:16,720 --> 00:04:22,880 Speaker 1: be negative, and also needing to remind himself that the 63 00:04:22,960 --> 00:04:26,480 Speaker 1: things that bring him happiness and joy are things he 64 00:04:26,560 --> 00:04:28,640 Speaker 1: needs to make sure are a part of his life. 65 00:04:29,440 --> 00:04:38,280 Speaker 1: Gladys is intense. Gladys loves her family so much that 66 00:04:38,320 --> 00:04:41,560 Speaker 1: I think sometimes some of her siblings and some of 67 00:04:41,600 --> 00:04:46,320 Speaker 1: the family members experience her love is abrasive, and experience 68 00:04:47,360 --> 00:04:52,280 Speaker 1: her language and her desires for them as abrasive. And 69 00:04:52,640 --> 00:04:55,520 Speaker 1: I think I think Gladys needed to learn throughout this 70 00:04:55,720 --> 00:05:02,080 Speaker 1: journey patience to allow people, autonomy, to allow people to 71 00:05:02,200 --> 00:05:07,080 Speaker 1: be who they are supposed to be, and she does 72 00:05:07,120 --> 00:05:09,560 Speaker 1: not have to control each and every detail. 73 00:05:11,120 --> 00:05:11,600 Speaker 7: Chris. 74 00:05:12,120 --> 00:05:15,680 Speaker 1: Chris is interesting to me because I think Chris he 75 00:05:15,760 --> 00:05:20,159 Speaker 1: has such leadership qualities and such a desire to be 76 00:05:20,240 --> 00:05:24,880 Speaker 1: the leader, to be the patriarch, if you will, and 77 00:05:24,920 --> 00:05:27,320 Speaker 1: I think his journey is about learning how to do 78 00:05:27,360 --> 00:05:31,560 Speaker 1: that and to bring people in and to be the 79 00:05:31,600 --> 00:05:35,920 Speaker 1: person that the younger generation in the family can look 80 00:05:36,040 --> 00:05:40,120 Speaker 1: up to and depend on to keep them to continue 81 00:05:40,120 --> 00:05:43,640 Speaker 1: to function with routines that are good and healthy for 82 00:05:43,800 --> 00:05:47,560 Speaker 1: a family. Jasmine is also on a journey, maybe not 83 00:05:47,640 --> 00:05:50,640 Speaker 1: so much of a journey of authenticity as I described 84 00:05:50,640 --> 00:05:54,400 Speaker 1: with Elijah, but potentially more so a journey of self 85 00:05:54,440 --> 00:05:58,960 Speaker 1: confidence and self esteem, a journey of realizing her own 86 00:05:59,040 --> 00:06:03,080 Speaker 1: truth and her own payer hour and realizing that though 87 00:06:03,200 --> 00:06:05,719 Speaker 1: mistakes have been made throughout life, like you can still 88 00:06:05,760 --> 00:06:09,159 Speaker 1: be the things that you want to still be and 89 00:06:09,240 --> 00:06:16,599 Speaker 1: make yourself and others proud of you. I think the 90 00:06:16,600 --> 00:06:22,320 Speaker 1: biggest challenge is how easy it is to not build 91 00:06:24,160 --> 00:06:28,160 Speaker 1: family sustaining routines. Like we live in a world where 92 00:06:28,200 --> 00:06:30,280 Speaker 1: it's just so easy to like live our own lives 93 00:06:30,360 --> 00:06:32,200 Speaker 1: and be in our own silo and just be in 94 00:06:32,240 --> 00:06:35,520 Speaker 1: our own bubble. And if you do that, before you 95 00:06:35,520 --> 00:06:38,000 Speaker 1: know what, you're going to turn around and that cousin 96 00:06:38,120 --> 00:06:42,120 Speaker 1: you knew when they were two is now twenty two, 97 00:06:42,520 --> 00:06:47,200 Speaker 1: or that uncle you haven't seen in you know, however 98 00:06:47,279 --> 00:06:51,440 Speaker 1: long is now passed away. Like it's just so easy 99 00:06:53,240 --> 00:06:55,919 Speaker 1: to just live our own lives and to be in 100 00:06:56,120 --> 00:07:00,680 Speaker 1: our own bubble. And I think the biggest challenge is 101 00:07:02,000 --> 00:07:06,080 Speaker 1: when you are working to reconnect with family, you have 102 00:07:06,160 --> 00:07:09,960 Speaker 1: to do some really uncomfortable work, which is I have 103 00:07:10,040 --> 00:07:14,160 Speaker 1: to step outside my bubble and do actions that I 104 00:07:14,200 --> 00:07:18,200 Speaker 1: wouldn't ordinarily do to reconnect with family. And the other 105 00:07:18,240 --> 00:07:21,560 Speaker 1: thing you have to do is you have to expose 106 00:07:21,600 --> 00:07:24,880 Speaker 1: yourself to hurts because one of the things that the 107 00:07:24,960 --> 00:07:32,080 Speaker 1: family experienced throughout this journey was rejection, because what happens 108 00:07:32,080 --> 00:07:34,360 Speaker 1: when you reach out to that cousin or that uncle 109 00:07:34,480 --> 00:07:38,280 Speaker 1: or that aunt or that you know, long long lost 110 00:07:38,480 --> 00:07:41,040 Speaker 1: sibling you haven't talked to in a minute. You reach 111 00:07:41,080 --> 00:07:42,840 Speaker 1: out to them and they don't return your phone call, 112 00:07:42,880 --> 00:07:46,320 Speaker 1: don't return your text message, or something gets lost in 113 00:07:46,360 --> 00:07:50,000 Speaker 1: translation because we're not super bonded, and you get your 114 00:07:50,000 --> 00:07:54,119 Speaker 1: feelings hurt, Like you have to expose yourself to being hurt, 115 00:07:54,520 --> 00:07:58,360 Speaker 1: to being rejected, and most people that's not a fun 116 00:07:58,400 --> 00:08:01,560 Speaker 1: experience to do. And I think the biggest challenge was 117 00:08:01,600 --> 00:08:05,040 Speaker 1: overcoming all of that and being like, in spite of 118 00:08:05,040 --> 00:08:09,120 Speaker 1: it being uncomfortable, in spite of it being unusual, it 119 00:08:09,200 --> 00:08:21,280 Speaker 1: is valuable and we must do it. So I just 120 00:08:21,320 --> 00:08:23,920 Speaker 1: want to kind of get to know, you guys, what 121 00:08:24,120 --> 00:08:29,600 Speaker 1: should I know as we go into this experience that 122 00:08:29,680 --> 00:08:32,280 Speaker 1: you guys think would be helpful, Like, what's important for 123 00:08:32,360 --> 00:08:32,800 Speaker 1: me to know? 124 00:08:33,760 --> 00:08:37,480 Speaker 5: My thing is learning about my siblings, my nephew, about 125 00:08:37,480 --> 00:08:40,600 Speaker 5: their struggles, their traumas. That way, I can also be 126 00:08:40,640 --> 00:08:43,679 Speaker 5: able to assist and understand their struggles, what they've been through, 127 00:08:43,800 --> 00:08:46,880 Speaker 5: they can understand mine, so we can move forward. And 128 00:08:47,000 --> 00:08:49,600 Speaker 5: because that's the thing, like I understand what therapy did 129 00:08:49,600 --> 00:08:54,079 Speaker 5: for me, how it helped me, and how I can 130 00:08:54,120 --> 00:08:56,439 Speaker 5: say that it's okay, you know, to be able to 131 00:08:56,440 --> 00:08:59,640 Speaker 5: talk to someone, because mental health is everything. It's one 132 00:08:59,640 --> 00:09:02,839 Speaker 5: of the most important things besides having health itself in 133 00:09:02,920 --> 00:09:07,520 Speaker 5: the body. So for me, I know how important, you know, 134 00:09:07,559 --> 00:09:09,560 Speaker 5: therapy is, and I know how important it is to 135 00:09:09,600 --> 00:09:13,240 Speaker 5: have family around you that you can talk to and 136 00:09:13,280 --> 00:09:16,839 Speaker 5: express and understand you know, it's okay not to be 137 00:09:16,920 --> 00:09:20,800 Speaker 5: okay sometimes and be able to build strength and love 138 00:09:20,880 --> 00:09:23,600 Speaker 5: within each other and know that you know, we all 139 00:09:23,640 --> 00:09:25,520 Speaker 5: love each other and we have love and have each 140 00:09:25,559 --> 00:09:29,040 Speaker 5: other back because sometimes you know, like I come from 141 00:09:29,080 --> 00:09:32,280 Speaker 5: a big family from my adopter side, my father's side, 142 00:09:32,280 --> 00:09:34,920 Speaker 5: on my mom's side, they're all a big family. And 143 00:09:35,880 --> 00:09:39,360 Speaker 5: my nephew, you know, he's the only but like for me, 144 00:09:39,480 --> 00:09:42,840 Speaker 5: I have so many siblings, so many cousins. You can 145 00:09:42,960 --> 00:09:48,000 Speaker 5: kind of sometimes get separated from family because it's so big, 146 00:09:48,200 --> 00:09:50,440 Speaker 5: or you don't always talk to all your siblings or 147 00:09:50,600 --> 00:09:54,160 Speaker 5: family members. Sometimes you you know, move apart from them. 148 00:09:54,440 --> 00:09:59,040 Speaker 5: So to come together, especially with this and have individuals 149 00:09:59,040 --> 00:10:02,240 Speaker 5: that understand you, it makes it easy to go to 150 00:10:02,240 --> 00:10:04,080 Speaker 5: your life because it makes it easier to pick up 151 00:10:04,080 --> 00:10:05,920 Speaker 5: that phone to be like, oh, I know who I 152 00:10:05,960 --> 00:10:08,400 Speaker 5: can call. I know who I have within my family 153 00:10:08,480 --> 00:10:10,280 Speaker 5: that I can talk to and relate to. 154 00:10:10,720 --> 00:10:13,960 Speaker 1: Chris, do I understand you were adopted and raised in 155 00:10:14,000 --> 00:10:16,599 Speaker 1: a different family and then these guys found you? 156 00:10:16,720 --> 00:10:18,080 Speaker 4: Is that right? Yeah? 157 00:10:18,120 --> 00:10:20,080 Speaker 1: What was that like to be found by these guys? 158 00:10:20,160 --> 00:10:21,960 Speaker 3: Chris's girlfriend found us? 159 00:10:22,440 --> 00:10:26,640 Speaker 1: Chris girlfriend, Chris, why did she do that? 160 00:10:27,480 --> 00:10:30,000 Speaker 5: I had expressed to her, I was trying to find 161 00:10:30,000 --> 00:10:32,040 Speaker 5: my family a long time ago. 162 00:10:31,760 --> 00:10:34,880 Speaker 4: Through the Navy. It didn't work out. She was in 163 00:10:34,920 --> 00:10:35,560 Speaker 4: the Navy with me. 164 00:10:36,120 --> 00:10:39,120 Speaker 5: She had got out and she still does, but she 165 00:10:39,160 --> 00:10:42,160 Speaker 5: works for the FBI. Up when I was actually stationed 166 00:10:42,200 --> 00:10:44,880 Speaker 5: out here in Florida, I think around oh three be four, 167 00:10:45,559 --> 00:10:47,600 Speaker 5: she had asked me, Hey, I remember you know us 168 00:10:47,640 --> 00:10:50,040 Speaker 5: talking about you not finding your family. You want to 169 00:10:50,040 --> 00:10:53,360 Speaker 5: find your family? She goes, I'm in that position to 170 00:10:53,480 --> 00:10:56,040 Speaker 5: do that. I said, I only know my grandmother's name. 171 00:10:56,080 --> 00:10:56,400 Speaker 4: That's it. 172 00:10:56,440 --> 00:10:58,680 Speaker 5: I didn't even know my dad's name. He was not 173 00:10:58,720 --> 00:11:04,920 Speaker 5: on my birth certificate. Dad's grandmother, my mom's grandmother. So yeah, 174 00:11:04,920 --> 00:11:06,880 Speaker 5: because I didn't know the last time I had seen 175 00:11:07,200 --> 00:11:10,400 Speaker 5: our father, I was seven years old. I remember the 176 00:11:10,480 --> 00:11:14,280 Speaker 5: day I was like in front of my adopted grandmother's 177 00:11:14,920 --> 00:11:17,880 Speaker 5: y already pulled up, like and you know, some small 178 00:11:17,960 --> 00:11:20,400 Speaker 5: station wagon budget you know, Puerto Rican family. 179 00:11:21,040 --> 00:11:23,160 Speaker 4: Hey, and like hey, I'll take you to the movies. 180 00:11:23,200 --> 00:11:24,480 Speaker 4: I was like, oh okay. He was like you want 181 00:11:24,520 --> 00:11:24,760 Speaker 4: to do that? 182 00:11:24,840 --> 00:11:27,560 Speaker 5: Like yeah, then boom that was it. Never seen him 183 00:11:27,840 --> 00:11:31,160 Speaker 5: dad was young when Yeah. Yeah, he was a teenager 184 00:11:31,200 --> 00:11:33,959 Speaker 5: when he had me. So he was trying to get 185 00:11:33,960 --> 00:11:35,720 Speaker 5: his life together. And I know he was at that 186 00:11:35,800 --> 00:11:39,720 Speaker 5: time back and forth through Puerto Rico and the United States. 187 00:11:39,760 --> 00:11:42,040 Speaker 4: But like I said, I was seven years old when 188 00:11:42,040 --> 00:11:46,720 Speaker 4: I last seen him. Yeah, it was like sixteen. He's 189 00:11:46,760 --> 00:11:47,360 Speaker 4: like sixteen. 190 00:11:48,679 --> 00:11:48,920 Speaker 6: Yeah. 191 00:11:50,200 --> 00:11:53,959 Speaker 4: So I grew up with my adopted family. I had 192 00:11:53,960 --> 00:11:54,600 Speaker 4: my traumas. 193 00:11:55,080 --> 00:11:57,360 Speaker 5: I had to get used to being separated from my family, 194 00:11:57,920 --> 00:12:00,520 Speaker 5: had a lot of questions why I didn't grow up 195 00:12:00,520 --> 00:12:01,320 Speaker 5: with my real family. 196 00:12:02,280 --> 00:12:04,320 Speaker 4: So it was a lot going through. 197 00:12:05,120 --> 00:12:06,680 Speaker 5: I had therapy all the way into I was in 198 00:12:06,960 --> 00:12:10,280 Speaker 5: high school because I just went through a lot, you know. 199 00:12:10,880 --> 00:12:12,720 Speaker 5: And then Boston is not a great city to go 200 00:12:12,760 --> 00:12:14,800 Speaker 5: through something like that because I grew up in Roxburgh. 201 00:12:14,800 --> 00:12:16,960 Speaker 4: I grew up in the Burry right on Blue Hill ass. 202 00:12:17,320 --> 00:12:22,160 Speaker 5: And so trying to deal with that, trying to deal 203 00:12:22,200 --> 00:12:25,320 Speaker 5: with the inner city was a lot. I had been 204 00:12:25,360 --> 00:12:28,760 Speaker 5: locked up dys all that, but like you know, I 205 00:12:28,800 --> 00:12:30,360 Speaker 5: went to a couple of therapists, so I found my 206 00:12:30,480 --> 00:12:33,000 Speaker 5: right therapists and it helped me. 207 00:12:33,080 --> 00:12:34,120 Speaker 4: Like like I said, it helped me. 208 00:12:34,160 --> 00:12:37,360 Speaker 5: But with finding my family was the last piece of 209 00:12:37,360 --> 00:12:42,040 Speaker 5: my life, you know, not being complete, like the last puzzle, right, 210 00:12:42,559 --> 00:12:45,719 Speaker 5: So when that happened, that was that was cool. I 211 00:12:45,760 --> 00:12:49,200 Speaker 5: remember my little sister Jasmine was there with my little 212 00:12:49,240 --> 00:12:51,280 Speaker 5: niece at the time, she was a baby, and that 213 00:12:51,360 --> 00:12:51,720 Speaker 5: was cool. 214 00:12:51,760 --> 00:12:55,520 Speaker 4: I still got the pictures and everything. It was on 215 00:12:55,559 --> 00:12:57,239 Speaker 4: the eleven o'clock news. 216 00:12:57,080 --> 00:13:00,560 Speaker 1: Chris, Why was your family reuniting on the news? Lots 217 00:13:00,559 --> 00:13:02,400 Speaker 1: of families night, what made yours? 218 00:13:02,880 --> 00:13:05,840 Speaker 5: What happened was when I was four years old, my 219 00:13:05,880 --> 00:13:07,720 Speaker 5: mom got in a fight with one of my siblings, 220 00:13:07,720 --> 00:13:11,800 Speaker 5: one of my siblings on my mom's side. My youngest brother, 221 00:13:11,840 --> 00:13:16,240 Speaker 5: Marcle got into a fight within that fight. It was 222 00:13:16,280 --> 00:13:21,400 Speaker 5: a tragedy night, so I was for my My mom 223 00:13:21,480 --> 00:13:25,400 Speaker 5: was in there fighting, having a physical fight. She ended 224 00:13:25,440 --> 00:13:27,840 Speaker 5: up sustaining a lot of wounds hit her head, so 225 00:13:28,120 --> 00:13:29,079 Speaker 5: she had a brain hemage. 226 00:13:29,720 --> 00:13:32,480 Speaker 4: So she died that night during that fight. 227 00:13:33,000 --> 00:13:35,600 Speaker 5: My two year old sister, she was in the Bathtom 228 00:13:35,960 --> 00:13:39,960 Speaker 5: alone during that fight, so she had slipped, hit her 229 00:13:40,000 --> 00:13:40,960 Speaker 5: head and drowned on the water. 230 00:13:41,720 --> 00:13:44,280 Speaker 4: So that's why he was crazy. 231 00:13:44,320 --> 00:13:47,520 Speaker 5: Because my other brother had took our younger brother out 232 00:13:47,600 --> 00:13:51,040 Speaker 5: the house to go out and call the police. He 233 00:13:51,120 --> 00:13:53,800 Speaker 5: was five, and so that's why it became like a 234 00:13:53,960 --> 00:13:56,000 Speaker 5: tragic thing, and it was on the news. 235 00:13:56,520 --> 00:13:57,840 Speaker 4: So that's why it made the news. 236 00:13:57,880 --> 00:14:02,719 Speaker 1: All those years later. Your family also made the news. Yeah, 237 00:14:02,800 --> 00:14:05,560 Speaker 1: do you remember when you're then girlfriend told you she 238 00:14:05,640 --> 00:14:06,440 Speaker 1: found your family. 239 00:14:07,559 --> 00:14:08,960 Speaker 4: Well, she surprised it on me. 240 00:14:10,320 --> 00:14:13,120 Speaker 5: The day like they had planned, like they were at 241 00:14:13,160 --> 00:14:15,959 Speaker 5: a center that was in Roxbury up in the Mission Hill. 242 00:14:16,679 --> 00:14:19,080 Speaker 5: I thought I was just going to see my little sister, 243 00:14:19,120 --> 00:14:21,880 Speaker 5: Jasmine for the first time. That's how our dad brought 244 00:14:21,920 --> 00:14:23,480 Speaker 5: it to me. He was like, oh, you know your sister, 245 00:14:23,480 --> 00:14:25,520 Speaker 5: We're gonna go pick up your sister. I was like, 246 00:14:25,560 --> 00:14:28,040 Speaker 5: all right, cool, I'm just going for the ride. She 247 00:14:28,120 --> 00:14:30,520 Speaker 5: was like, oh, yeah, your sister, she's at some party. 248 00:14:30,640 --> 00:14:32,680 Speaker 5: We got to pick her up from there. I'm like 249 00:14:32,880 --> 00:14:34,360 Speaker 5: all right, you know, I'm not you know, I'm just 250 00:14:34,400 --> 00:14:36,400 Speaker 5: like all right, that's cool. I'm just trying to see 251 00:14:36,400 --> 00:14:39,640 Speaker 5: my sister. I walk in and everybody was there because 252 00:14:39,720 --> 00:14:44,040 Speaker 5: my girlfriend at the time, she had told me she 253 00:14:44,040 --> 00:14:46,160 Speaker 5: had to go back to DC, back to d C, 254 00:14:46,480 --> 00:14:50,880 Speaker 5: so she faked like she left, went back out of town. 255 00:14:51,920 --> 00:14:53,840 Speaker 5: So I'm just like, I'm just chilling with my dad 256 00:14:53,880 --> 00:14:57,640 Speaker 5: and going and had my son with me. We walked 257 00:14:57,720 --> 00:14:59,440 Speaker 5: up in the center, read it by everybody. It was 258 00:14:59,440 --> 00:15:01,520 Speaker 5: a big shop because I was like, what was going on? 259 00:15:01,560 --> 00:15:03,800 Speaker 4: You know? But that was cool, you know, and had 260 00:15:03,840 --> 00:15:05,840 Speaker 4: the news. I'm looking around like what in the world. 261 00:15:06,360 --> 00:15:08,760 Speaker 5: My younger brother, Marca, was one of the first person 262 00:15:08,760 --> 00:15:10,800 Speaker 5: that came up and grabbed me. And I've never seen 263 00:15:10,800 --> 00:15:12,680 Speaker 5: my brothers, so that was cool. 264 00:15:13,160 --> 00:15:15,920 Speaker 1: You reminded me of something I don't always think about. 265 00:15:16,440 --> 00:15:21,200 Speaker 1: Bluehill Ave. I spent a lot of my childhood. My 266 00:15:21,320 --> 00:15:23,880 Speaker 1: dad lived right off of Blue Hill Ave and my 267 00:15:24,160 --> 00:15:26,880 Speaker 1: childhood church it was in Georchester and it was right 268 00:15:26,920 --> 00:15:31,720 Speaker 1: off Blue Hill AF. It was called Refuge Church of Christ. Yeah, 269 00:15:31,720 --> 00:15:33,840 Speaker 1: I think that was where I spent every Sunday in 270 00:15:33,840 --> 00:15:34,560 Speaker 1: my childhood. 271 00:15:34,680 --> 00:15:35,840 Speaker 4: Mine was St. Patrick's. 272 00:15:35,840 --> 00:15:38,960 Speaker 1: Oh wow, very nice? Okay, cool, all right? What does 273 00:15:39,000 --> 00:15:41,080 Speaker 1: anybody else want to share something they think? I need 274 00:15:41,120 --> 00:15:43,720 Speaker 1: to know as we go it in this journey. Thank 275 00:15:43,760 --> 00:15:45,160 Speaker 1: you Chris Well. 276 00:15:45,000 --> 00:15:49,720 Speaker 2: I will share mit. I was a bit skeptical as well. 277 00:15:50,600 --> 00:15:55,120 Speaker 2: I can't be an overshare, which makes me nervous about 278 00:15:55,760 --> 00:16:00,000 Speaker 2: relationships on my mom's side of the family, so I 279 00:16:00,520 --> 00:16:04,920 Speaker 2: coming into this, I wanted to pour into It feels 280 00:16:04,920 --> 00:16:06,920 Speaker 2: weird saying like my dad's side, my mom's side, but 281 00:16:07,000 --> 00:16:10,920 Speaker 2: my dad, my siblings on my dad's side, because we've 282 00:16:11,000 --> 00:16:15,320 Speaker 2: always I feel like since we've found Chris, we've all 283 00:16:15,360 --> 00:16:18,560 Speaker 2: tried to stay in contact with each other because we 284 00:16:18,600 --> 00:16:22,120 Speaker 2: also found my brother Lance right before we found Chris. 285 00:16:22,320 --> 00:16:27,320 Speaker 2: So yeah, it was like since Chris came it kind 286 00:16:27,360 --> 00:16:31,360 Speaker 2: of connected that clue, we've always stayed in contact. I've 287 00:16:31,400 --> 00:16:36,680 Speaker 2: had a lot of trauma with my siblings on my 288 00:16:36,840 --> 00:16:41,160 Speaker 2: mom's side. Now that I'm in a healing space, I 289 00:16:41,240 --> 00:16:44,720 Speaker 2: want to pour into my siblings that have been there 290 00:16:44,720 --> 00:16:47,440 Speaker 2: for me, which I've been on my dad's side, which 291 00:16:47,480 --> 00:16:50,080 Speaker 2: is so weird because my dad didn't raise any of us. 292 00:16:51,400 --> 00:16:54,880 Speaker 7: So out anytime. 293 00:16:54,360 --> 00:16:56,760 Speaker 2: We get together, even if it's two of us, three 294 00:16:56,800 --> 00:16:59,800 Speaker 2: of us, five of us, a thousand of us, people 295 00:17:00,040 --> 00:17:03,240 Speaker 2: literally think grew up together because we're just so tight 296 00:17:03,280 --> 00:17:06,639 Speaker 2: but we haven't even we haven't all been together one time. 297 00:17:07,520 --> 00:17:10,680 Speaker 2: My brother's wedding will be the first time we're all 298 00:17:10,720 --> 00:17:13,760 Speaker 2: gonna be together, except for the one that's missing. 299 00:17:16,000 --> 00:17:18,200 Speaker 7: We don't know if she's we don't know, We don't 300 00:17:18,200 --> 00:17:18,480 Speaker 7: know her. 301 00:17:20,040 --> 00:17:27,280 Speaker 2: But yes, I I I lost my oldest brother and 302 00:17:27,359 --> 00:17:32,040 Speaker 2: I lost my oldest sister on my mom's side. 303 00:17:32,480 --> 00:17:38,080 Speaker 1: And that's the night to right. No, no, this is 304 00:17:38,320 --> 00:17:39,960 Speaker 1: on my mom's side. 305 00:17:40,520 --> 00:17:43,520 Speaker 7: I didn't even know that about Chris. I just learned 306 00:17:43,520 --> 00:17:44,200 Speaker 7: this right now. 307 00:17:44,400 --> 00:17:47,920 Speaker 1: Hey, Jasmine, can I interpt for a second? How many 308 00:17:48,040 --> 00:17:49,240 Speaker 1: kids did your father have? 309 00:17:50,080 --> 00:17:51,720 Speaker 4: Oh that. 310 00:17:53,480 --> 00:17:55,160 Speaker 7: You want to Chris is the oldest. 311 00:17:55,480 --> 00:17:58,600 Speaker 3: We don't know if Jasmine's actually the baby, but she's 312 00:17:58,600 --> 00:17:59,480 Speaker 3: the baby right now. 313 00:18:00,080 --> 00:18:00,760 Speaker 7: He was the baby. 314 00:18:00,800 --> 00:18:05,080 Speaker 3: But there's a sister who is Italian. Her mother's Italian, 315 00:18:05,119 --> 00:18:08,200 Speaker 3: and she is in Connecticut. So our dad really has 316 00:18:08,240 --> 00:18:14,200 Speaker 3: helped populate the New England area. The only two siblings 317 00:18:14,240 --> 00:18:17,600 Speaker 3: from my father that grown up together from birth and 318 00:18:17,920 --> 00:18:20,960 Speaker 3: up is Lewis and I. So my mom had two 319 00:18:21,040 --> 00:18:24,800 Speaker 3: children with my father, and my dad does have one 320 00:18:24,800 --> 00:18:28,600 Speaker 3: more child. That is she's a young woman who's out 321 00:18:28,640 --> 00:18:31,560 Speaker 3: in the world that we would love to connect with. 322 00:18:31,640 --> 00:18:33,359 Speaker 3: That's one of the things that just to be fair 323 00:18:33,359 --> 00:18:36,840 Speaker 3: about our father growing up, because I was his eldest 324 00:18:36,920 --> 00:18:41,119 Speaker 3: without knowing where Chris was. My dad always prayed to 325 00:18:41,200 --> 00:18:45,040 Speaker 3: find all his children always, you know it said, like 326 00:18:45,560 --> 00:18:48,320 Speaker 3: I just pray, and he always spoke about Chris. So 327 00:18:48,760 --> 00:18:51,840 Speaker 3: I grew up knowing I had my big brother Chris, 328 00:18:52,280 --> 00:18:55,919 Speaker 3: but I didn't know about Lance, nor did I know 329 00:18:56,040 --> 00:19:01,000 Speaker 3: about the youngest sister until later on. But yeah, we're 330 00:19:01,040 --> 00:19:03,360 Speaker 3: so much alike all of our siblings that are from 331 00:19:03,359 --> 00:19:08,520 Speaker 3: our mother. The interesting thing about us, we don't, like 332 00:19:08,600 --> 00:19:11,760 Speaker 3: Jasmine said, it's weird saying my siblings from my mom 333 00:19:11,800 --> 00:19:16,440 Speaker 3: because when we're all together, no one separates that that's 334 00:19:16,560 --> 00:19:20,439 Speaker 3: just Jasmine's sister. No, we all claim each other's siblings. 335 00:19:20,520 --> 00:19:24,440 Speaker 3: I never remembered growing up that the women my dad 336 00:19:24,480 --> 00:19:28,480 Speaker 3: had children with, I've never seen our mothers disagree. Our 337 00:19:28,520 --> 00:19:30,920 Speaker 3: mothers were always four. Like, if you're going to see 338 00:19:30,920 --> 00:19:34,560 Speaker 3: your sibling, go see your siblings. So it's where although 339 00:19:34,560 --> 00:19:41,040 Speaker 3: we're just a different family as far as DNA, we 340 00:19:41,119 --> 00:19:42,000 Speaker 3: all claim each other. 341 00:19:42,280 --> 00:19:46,280 Speaker 1: So yeah, yeah, so that means they're six right now. 342 00:19:46,359 --> 00:19:46,840 Speaker 3: It is six. 343 00:19:46,920 --> 00:19:49,240 Speaker 7: Dad's biological children are six. 344 00:19:50,200 --> 00:19:54,760 Speaker 1: Elijah, what was it like growing up in a family 345 00:19:55,359 --> 00:19:59,080 Speaker 1: like this one, discovery uncles and aunts. 346 00:19:59,320 --> 00:20:03,199 Speaker 6: When you something that I wanted to bring up was 347 00:20:03,280 --> 00:20:06,800 Speaker 6: sort of uncertainty for me. I grew up with a 348 00:20:06,880 --> 00:20:12,040 Speaker 6: lot of uncertainty because my childhood was vastly different from 349 00:20:12,080 --> 00:20:16,480 Speaker 6: everyone else's. Here once again the only child. I had 350 00:20:16,720 --> 00:20:19,800 Speaker 6: both of my parents in my life for a while, 351 00:20:19,960 --> 00:20:22,280 Speaker 6: but it was more because I had to move back 352 00:20:22,320 --> 00:20:26,800 Speaker 6: and forth between them. At one point, it was just 353 00:20:26,840 --> 00:20:30,440 Speaker 6: different neighborhoods, and then it eventually grew to different states. 354 00:20:31,000 --> 00:20:36,000 Speaker 6: I got to see different parts of my family, from 355 00:20:36,040 --> 00:20:39,879 Speaker 6: my dad and mom's side and my stepmom's side because 356 00:20:40,080 --> 00:20:45,480 Speaker 6: I like stepmom, I got to see different family dynamics. 357 00:20:46,520 --> 00:20:50,240 Speaker 6: It has made me through the good and bad, and 358 00:20:50,400 --> 00:20:54,600 Speaker 6: very uncertain about certain things. I've always been a loner 359 00:20:54,680 --> 00:20:58,639 Speaker 6: by nature, but then also I've also grown up to 360 00:20:58,640 --> 00:21:04,880 Speaker 6: be somewhat cynical two and because that's like when you 361 00:21:04,960 --> 00:21:08,320 Speaker 6: grow up with so many different people and you see 362 00:21:08,400 --> 00:21:11,879 Speaker 6: how much like when people will first present themselves to 363 00:21:11,920 --> 00:21:18,880 Speaker 6: be one thing and then they eventually be ill approach 364 00:21:18,920 --> 00:21:23,400 Speaker 6: a situation with a certain amount of caution. That has 365 00:21:23,520 --> 00:21:29,800 Speaker 6: made me question things about family, love, relationships, myself and 366 00:21:30,840 --> 00:21:37,040 Speaker 6: you know, I'm not necessarily Yeah, it's a it's a 367 00:21:37,200 --> 00:21:41,399 Speaker 6: very interesting what's it called conversation? Because when you guys, 368 00:21:42,040 --> 00:21:46,000 Speaker 6: when all everyone here talks about how you know, it 369 00:21:46,080 --> 00:21:51,879 Speaker 6: didn't differentiate between siblings or who's really connected. They just 370 00:21:51,920 --> 00:21:55,919 Speaker 6: all adopted each other. For me, it would be I 371 00:21:55,960 --> 00:21:58,120 Speaker 6: would be a but more I guess you could say 372 00:21:58,119 --> 00:22:04,800 Speaker 6: skeptical and analytical about it, because you know, I just 373 00:22:04,840 --> 00:22:07,679 Speaker 6: that's the way I grew up. Like separation was the 374 00:22:07,760 --> 00:22:09,240 Speaker 6: name of the game and a lot. 375 00:22:09,119 --> 00:22:12,440 Speaker 1: Of instances, how did you deal with that? 376 00:22:14,800 --> 00:22:19,560 Speaker 6: Moving around? I did stuff on my own. I learned 377 00:22:19,560 --> 00:22:22,720 Speaker 6: to entertain myself be in my own world. It wasn't 378 00:22:22,720 --> 00:22:26,680 Speaker 6: as confusing in that situation. Oftentimes I would be the 379 00:22:26,720 --> 00:22:31,879 Speaker 6: oldest of the group, and for a while I learned 380 00:22:31,880 --> 00:22:35,400 Speaker 6: to be able to, you know, get people together. Or 381 00:22:36,400 --> 00:22:39,159 Speaker 6: if I wasn't on my own, I was with other people, 382 00:22:39,200 --> 00:22:42,000 Speaker 6: but I would always either be like the one who 383 00:22:42,119 --> 00:22:45,040 Speaker 6: was the quietest or the one who was the loudest. 384 00:22:45,040 --> 00:22:48,879 Speaker 6: Like it just depended on the situation, and it was 385 00:22:49,000 --> 00:22:53,960 Speaker 6: mostly just adapting to whether the situation needed that. I 386 00:22:54,040 --> 00:22:54,520 Speaker 6: learned to do. 387 00:22:55,040 --> 00:22:58,800 Speaker 1: Eliza, you use the word confusing a few times about 388 00:23:00,240 --> 00:23:04,040 Speaker 1: that upbringing. Would it be good for you if there 389 00:23:04,119 --> 00:23:06,199 Speaker 1: was some clarity that came out of this process, some 390 00:23:06,280 --> 00:23:08,000 Speaker 1: family clarity. 391 00:23:08,080 --> 00:23:10,640 Speaker 6: I think it would be, but I'm not sure if 392 00:23:10,640 --> 00:23:11,440 Speaker 6: that's possible. 393 00:23:11,760 --> 00:23:13,679 Speaker 1: But if it is possible, you think it'd be a 394 00:23:13,680 --> 00:23:16,000 Speaker 1: good thing. If we're able to pull it off, that 395 00:23:16,000 --> 00:23:18,119 Speaker 1: would be a good thing for you in your life. 396 00:23:18,920 --> 00:23:19,960 Speaker 3: Sure you cool? 397 00:23:20,000 --> 00:23:24,760 Speaker 1: Okay, Thanks Elijah. The conversation doesn't stop here. We'll be 398 00:23:24,880 --> 00:23:35,959 Speaker 1: right back with more family therapy, anything else that anyone 399 00:23:36,000 --> 00:23:38,480 Speaker 1: wants to share that might be helpful and useful for 400 00:23:38,560 --> 00:23:40,000 Speaker 1: me as we go into this process. 401 00:23:40,280 --> 00:23:45,639 Speaker 3: Well, Elijah, you're like, you're you're full on right just here. Yeah, 402 00:23:45,680 --> 00:23:48,239 Speaker 3: you know, thank you so much for bringing up the 403 00:23:48,280 --> 00:23:51,520 Speaker 3: confusion and speaking on that, because I do think that 404 00:23:51,520 --> 00:23:56,560 Speaker 3: that is important, and I think for me, like Elijah 405 00:23:56,560 --> 00:24:00,840 Speaker 3: and I, I've always wanted us to have therapy. So 406 00:24:01,000 --> 00:24:04,760 Speaker 3: this is a beautiful opportunity. I just didn't know that 407 00:24:04,840 --> 00:24:07,400 Speaker 3: it was going to be in this dynamic of us 408 00:24:07,440 --> 00:24:10,880 Speaker 3: being able to speak about everything, as far as whatever 409 00:24:10,960 --> 00:24:14,600 Speaker 3: we could clear up between son and mother, because I'm 410 00:24:14,680 --> 00:24:18,639 Speaker 3: so I'm big on everything happens at home. You know, 411 00:24:18,760 --> 00:24:20,840 Speaker 3: war and peace happened at home, and we bring it 412 00:24:20,880 --> 00:24:26,000 Speaker 3: into the world. Elijah has always been a peaceful soulful 413 00:24:27,119 --> 00:24:31,360 Speaker 3: old soul, freight straight from the wound, like Homie came 414 00:24:31,400 --> 00:24:36,679 Speaker 3: out with a little mustache like he was. There's so 415 00:24:36,800 --> 00:24:39,560 Speaker 3: many times I remember that I would just sit down 416 00:24:39,600 --> 00:24:43,320 Speaker 3: with him and ask him, like who was he reincarnated for? 417 00:24:43,640 --> 00:24:45,679 Speaker 3: And did he really come into the world to, like, 418 00:24:46,400 --> 00:24:49,240 Speaker 3: you know, save and help so many people in the world. 419 00:24:49,359 --> 00:24:53,520 Speaker 3: So I am opened and elliot, I'm a complete open book. 420 00:24:53,600 --> 00:24:56,760 Speaker 3: So I don't know where or what questions you want 421 00:24:56,840 --> 00:25:00,199 Speaker 3: to ask, but like, I really want Elijah to be 422 00:25:00,240 --> 00:25:04,000 Speaker 3: able to come out of here with as much clarity 423 00:25:04,200 --> 00:25:07,239 Speaker 3: as possible, with the support of my siblings as well, 424 00:25:07,280 --> 00:25:11,040 Speaker 3: because we've all been around like Chris coming into our 425 00:25:11,080 --> 00:25:14,040 Speaker 3: lives was when Elijah was two. Chris has been a 426 00:25:14,160 --> 00:25:17,040 Speaker 3: huge part as well as although we didn't know him 427 00:25:17,080 --> 00:25:21,320 Speaker 3: growing up, we know each other's children per se like 428 00:25:21,400 --> 00:25:22,000 Speaker 3: you know so. 429 00:25:22,920 --> 00:25:25,240 Speaker 1: And the reason why I think that stood out to 430 00:25:25,240 --> 00:25:29,160 Speaker 1: me is if I put myself in Elijah's shoes, most kids, 431 00:25:29,160 --> 00:25:31,760 Speaker 1: it's like, Okay, there's Mom, and there's I know who 432 00:25:31,800 --> 00:25:34,200 Speaker 1: my uncles and aunts are, I know my cousins are. 433 00:25:34,320 --> 00:25:38,159 Speaker 1: It helps us form the world in Elijah's case, he 434 00:25:38,280 --> 00:25:40,399 Speaker 1: was being introduced to, like, oh, you've now got a 435 00:25:40,440 --> 00:25:44,000 Speaker 1: new uncle that we didn't know Aunt. Things were moving pieces, 436 00:25:44,200 --> 00:25:47,760 Speaker 1: which is not necessarily bad. It would be probably a 437 00:25:47,760 --> 00:25:51,919 Speaker 1: wonderful thing to help like clarity and crystallization happen. Because 438 00:25:52,040 --> 00:25:55,679 Speaker 1: Elijah said something super important and I agree with you. 439 00:25:55,720 --> 00:25:58,720 Speaker 1: There's something about Elijah, Gladdys, there's something about your son 440 00:25:59,520 --> 00:26:01,880 Speaker 1: when you describemen as an old soul. I was like, yep, 441 00:26:01,960 --> 00:26:05,600 Speaker 1: that's how I experience him too. He seems peaceful in 442 00:26:05,640 --> 00:26:08,720 Speaker 1: the zen kind of way. He said something that my 443 00:26:08,760 --> 00:26:13,520 Speaker 1: psychotherapy ears really stood out, which is I'm skeptical of relationships, 444 00:26:14,080 --> 00:26:17,000 Speaker 1: and I think that speaks to growing up in an 445 00:26:17,040 --> 00:26:20,760 Speaker 1: environment where things were moving around him, which isn't anybody's 446 00:26:20,760 --> 00:26:23,760 Speaker 1: fault necessarily. Like I'm not saying anyone did a bad 447 00:26:23,840 --> 00:26:27,000 Speaker 1: job or anything, but the environment he was in contributes 448 00:26:27,000 --> 00:26:30,240 Speaker 1: to him being cautious in those ways now and I 449 00:26:30,280 --> 00:26:33,320 Speaker 1: as I hear these the story and I'm just like, Wow, 450 00:26:33,960 --> 00:26:36,000 Speaker 1: this is going to be super impactful when we get 451 00:26:36,000 --> 00:26:44,359 Speaker 1: it organized and making sense. Because Elijah is like the 452 00:26:44,400 --> 00:26:49,399 Speaker 1: next generation. He will experience the impact of that. The 453 00:26:49,440 --> 00:26:52,399 Speaker 1: stuff you guys are doing are going to impact Elijah's 454 00:26:52,480 --> 00:26:56,960 Speaker 1: unborn children because it'll it'll kind of take the family 455 00:26:57,040 --> 00:27:00,000 Speaker 1: and make it make sense because your your family story 456 00:27:00,080 --> 00:27:04,399 Speaker 1: is an unusual family story. It's not the typical family story. Again, 457 00:27:04,440 --> 00:27:08,359 Speaker 1: it doesn't make it bad in anyway, but it means wow, like, 458 00:27:08,400 --> 00:27:10,159 Speaker 1: what if we did some things kind of organize it 459 00:27:10,160 --> 00:27:13,840 Speaker 1: in a way that made sense and added safety. You 460 00:27:14,200 --> 00:27:18,040 Speaker 1: probably start experiencing Elijah's being more confident and being more 461 00:27:18,160 --> 00:27:20,680 Speaker 1: kind of assured of himself as he goes into other 462 00:27:20,760 --> 00:27:24,400 Speaker 1: dynamics in his life. And it's exciting. I'm super excited 463 00:27:24,400 --> 00:27:26,960 Speaker 1: now to start to start this journey. 464 00:27:27,359 --> 00:27:32,359 Speaker 2: I have a special relationship with Elijah and I you know, 465 00:27:32,440 --> 00:27:35,720 Speaker 2: there's things, you know, I feel like the best auntie, 466 00:27:35,920 --> 00:27:39,119 Speaker 2: so you know, they vent to me a lot. And 467 00:27:39,440 --> 00:27:42,960 Speaker 2: because I want to keep you know, our relationship sacred 468 00:27:43,080 --> 00:27:45,800 Speaker 2: and I want their voice to be heard, I think 469 00:27:45,840 --> 00:27:49,200 Speaker 2: this is going to be a great opportunity for all 470 00:27:49,240 --> 00:27:52,359 Speaker 2: of us, but especially Elijah, so. 471 00:27:52,359 --> 00:27:54,440 Speaker 7: His voice can be heard as well. 472 00:27:54,640 --> 00:27:55,840 Speaker 3: I agree. 473 00:27:56,640 --> 00:27:59,959 Speaker 1: This was the beginning the gathering of four family men 474 00:28:00,359 --> 00:28:03,800 Speaker 1: with mixed reviews about therapy, coming together for the purpose 475 00:28:03,880 --> 00:28:10,280 Speaker 1: of understanding one another more. Chris Gladys Elijah and Jasmine, 476 00:28:10,600 --> 00:28:15,320 Speaker 1: four voices, one table and stories on top of stories 477 00:28:15,359 --> 00:28:18,400 Speaker 1: of the past and of the present. And as we 478 00:28:18,480 --> 00:28:22,280 Speaker 1: proceed in the coming episodes, I will aim to inspire 479 00:28:22,320 --> 00:28:26,000 Speaker 1: these stories to pivot towards the future, the stories that 480 00:28:26,119 --> 00:28:31,080 Speaker 1: haven't happened yet. But it's important to envision our ideal selves, 481 00:28:32,040 --> 00:28:35,240 Speaker 1: who we want to be, how we want to interact, 482 00:28:35,600 --> 00:28:39,280 Speaker 1: and the connections we seek to have with our family members. 483 00:28:39,960 --> 00:28:43,720 Speaker 1: We'll go deeper into the legacy of trauma, into the 484 00:28:43,800 --> 00:28:47,880 Speaker 1: role of survival, into the fragile yet powerful work of 485 00:28:47,960 --> 00:28:50,880 Speaker 1: healing between a mother and her son, and how to 486 00:28:51,000 --> 00:28:54,080 Speaker 1: get out of your own way. Because this is not 487 00:28:54,160 --> 00:28:57,680 Speaker 1: just therapy, this is a family's journey and we are 488 00:28:57,840 --> 00:29:01,640 Speaker 1: just getting started. I would love to hear from you 489 00:29:01,840 --> 00:29:05,440 Speaker 1: about your healing journey, your family and your feedback. Leave 490 00:29:05,480 --> 00:29:08,120 Speaker 1: a review, send a DM, connect with me on socials 491 00:29:08,160 --> 00:29:12,320 Speaker 1: at Elliott Speaks. Family Therapy is a production of iHeartRadio 492 00:29:12,440 --> 00:29:15,160 Speaker 1: and The Black Effect Podcast Network. Special thanks to our 493 00:29:15,200 --> 00:29:18,959 Speaker 1: assistant Glendale Seppe. It's produced by jack Quee Thomas and 494 00:29:19,040 --> 00:29:20,959 Speaker 1: the executive producer Dolly S. 495 00:29:20,960 --> 00:29:21,400 Speaker 7: S Fisher. 496 00:29:21,640 --> 00:29:24,960 Speaker 1: For more podcasts from The Black Effect, visit the iHeartRadio 497 00:29:25,040 --> 00:29:28,200 Speaker 1: app or wherever you listen to your favorite shows. The 498 00:29:28,240 --> 00:29:31,120 Speaker 1: content presented on the Family Therapy Podcast serves solely for 499 00:29:31,280 --> 00:29:34,040 Speaker 1: educational and informational purposes. It should not be considered a 500 00:29:34,040 --> 00:29:36,920 Speaker 1: replacement for personalized medical or mental health guidance and does 501 00:29:36,960 --> 00:29:40,200 Speaker 1: not constitute a provider patient relationship. It is advisable to 502 00:29:40,240 --> 00:29:42,880 Speaker 1: consult with your healthcare provider or health team for any 503 00:29:42,920 --> 00:29:44,760 Speaker 1: specific concerns or questions you may have.