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Speaker 1: It is time now for today's Strawberry Letter. And if

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Speaker 1: you need advice on relationships, works, sex, parenting and more,

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Speaker 1: please submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve HAARVEFM dot com

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Speaker 1: and all you have to do is click.

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Speaker 2: On submit Strawberry Letter. We could be reading.

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Speaker 1: Your letter live on the air, just like we're going

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Speaker 1: to read this one right here, right now, right now.

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Speaker 3: Buckle up, hold on tight. We got a point you here.

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Speaker 3: It is Strawberry Letter.

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Speaker 2: Thank you for you.

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Speaker 1: Subject is his mama that important. Dear Stephen Shirley. My

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Speaker 1: boyfriend and I have been engaged for three years. When

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Speaker 1: we set our wedding date, his mother asked us to

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Speaker 1: move it back because she was getting her kitchen renovated

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Speaker 1: and it wouldn't be done by our wedding date, so

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Speaker 1: her family could not stay with her. I asked if

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Speaker 1: her family could get hotel rooms, and she got hot

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Speaker 1: with me and said that I can't expect people to

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Speaker 1: spend money to come to my wedding and pay for

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Speaker 1: hotel rooms. I was so upset, and so was my boyfriend.

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Speaker 1: But we changed the date of our wedding. We moved

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Speaker 1: it to November of last year. His mother's house was done,

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Speaker 1: but then she had four trees cut down in her backyard.

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Speaker 2: She was outside being a.

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Speaker 1: Busybody one day and she tripped over a branch and

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Speaker 1: shattered her knee. This was late August of twenty twenty two,

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Speaker 1: and she told my boyfriend and I that she would

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Speaker 1: not be healed by our November wedding date, and she

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Speaker 1: insisted that we reschedule it yet again. I ran to

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Speaker 1: my mom very upset and crying. So my mom went

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Speaker 1: by my boyfriend's mom's house to see if she was

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Speaker 1: trying to sabotage our wedding. After the visit, my mom

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Speaker 1: was singing this woman's praises and she told me that

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Speaker 1: I needed to respect my future mother in law from

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Speaker 1: here on out and check in with her before we

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Speaker 1: set another wedding date. I asked her why my boyfriend's

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Speaker 1: mom was that important, and she told me that his

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Speaker 1: mother plans to pay for our entire.

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Speaker 2: Wedding and our honeymoon. Yeah. I do not give a

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Speaker 2: darn what she pays for. I don't want I don't

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Speaker 2: want her to hold this over our heads.

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Speaker 1: My boyfriend did not know about his mom's plans to

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Speaker 1: put the bill.

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Speaker 2: Is she being nice? Or controlling? Will we be wrong

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Speaker 2: to Elope?

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Speaker 1: Listen, this is your wedding, okay and ultimately your marriage

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Speaker 1: and all of that, and you have every right to

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Speaker 1: do it how you want to do it, Okay. Now,

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Speaker 1: will feelings be heard and all of that if you Elope,

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Speaker 1: Absolutely they will. People love weddings. People will be mad

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Speaker 1: if they don't get to partake in the festivities and

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Speaker 1: all of that, but there's nothing they can do about

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Speaker 1: it once you guys are married, if you decide to Elope,

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Speaker 1: So there's that, But you're really not doing a wedding

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Speaker 1: for people anyway. So his mother wants to be there,

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Speaker 1: and yes, she wants to be in control of something,

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Speaker 1: since she's paying for the whole thing. Now, you guys

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Speaker 1: say you didn't know that, but that answers the question

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Speaker 1: of why she thinks she can have so much input

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Speaker 1: in asking you guys to change the data and all

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Speaker 1: of that. You asked if she's being nice or if

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Speaker 1: she's being controlling, and.

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Speaker 2: The answer is probably a little bit of both.

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Speaker 1: I mean, you know, she thinks she's paying for it

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Speaker 1: is actually generous of It's definitely generous of her. But

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Speaker 1: the truth of the matter is it's still your day

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Speaker 1: and your way. So if you and your fiance can

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Speaker 1: afford it all and you don't need his mom's help,

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Speaker 1: and you don't want his mom's help. You've been engaged

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Speaker 1: for three years, you want to get it done, then

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Speaker 1: pay for the wedding yourselves, and have the wedding you

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Speaker 1: want when you want it. But just know that feelings

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Speaker 1: will be hurt, and mostly it'll be both your moms.

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Speaker 2: Steve, this is.

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Speaker 4: A weird letter because I thought it was going to

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Speaker 4: be about something else. What So I kind of prejudged

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Speaker 4: the letter because I was already not gonna like the girl.

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Speaker 4: Is your mama that important?

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Speaker 3: Yes she is?

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Speaker 4: Oh, And that was going to be the end of it,

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Speaker 4: and I didn't like after that. But after hearing the letter,

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Speaker 4: it took a goak. So here's a deal with this letter.

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Speaker 4: The lady who writes the letter has a valid point,

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Speaker 4: but it's also a lot of other stuff in here too.

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Speaker 4: Now you've been engaged for three years, y'all set your

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Speaker 4: wedding date. Then his mama asked you to move the

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Speaker 4: date back because she was getting her kitchen renovated and

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Speaker 4: it wouldn't be done by the wedding date. And now

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Speaker 4: so her family couldn't stay with her. So then the

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Speaker 4: girl went in that ask the mama, well, whytn't your

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Speaker 4: family just get some hotel rooms? And she got hot

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Speaker 4: with the girl and said, ain't nobody You can't expect

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Speaker 4: nobody come your wedding and spend money on the hotel

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Speaker 4: rooms too. Right, then the girl got upset and the

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Speaker 4: boyfriend got upset too. But y'all changed the date of

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Speaker 4: your wedding. Now understand something. You got to understand. Your

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Speaker 4: boyfriend's family. These regular folks, now they calculates every dollar. See,

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Speaker 4: you ain't even passed out no invitation to all them people.

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Speaker 4: They just know little little little Ray Ray getting married

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Speaker 4: and they all got to come.

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Speaker 3: So now all these.

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Speaker 4: People gonna come in that they ain't got no business

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Speaker 4: coming they driving in. Ain't nobody finish flying they do

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Speaker 4: regular people. Let's let's just stop saying this is these

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Speaker 4: people ain't got money for.

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Speaker 3: None of this here.

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Speaker 2: Uh huh.

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Speaker 4: These ain't no regular folks playing stuff different, So these

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Speaker 4: are sub regular people they do. They do group poverty.

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Speaker 4: They make group poverty decisions.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 4: See, regular people, regular people playing stuff, you know, budget

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Speaker 4: their money for their vacation and stuff like that.

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Speaker 3: I got that when people get together as.

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Speaker 4: A group to vote on PO activities, this is when

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Speaker 4: like we all come in here.

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Speaker 3: Who how many can fit in that car? Okay? Who

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Speaker 3: else can drive? Who got a car that can make it?

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Speaker 4: Who got a car that can come from Detroit and

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Speaker 4: get down here to Kentucky? Who got caught? And that

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Speaker 4: that knocks out two three people right there. So by

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Speaker 4: the time they get the three people that's got cars

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Speaker 4: that can.

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Speaker 3: Make it in them three.

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Speaker 4: Cars gonna be eighteen people, gonna be eighteen people.

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Speaker 3: Three in the front of the interpack. Get what you're

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Speaker 3: finished with.

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Speaker 4: That's crowded, and one of the car gonna have a

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Speaker 4: trailer and the other cargo had that ski rack on

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Speaker 4: top with luggage just bungee coated on top of it.

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Speaker 3: Hang on, hang on, Steve, come back. I'll tell you wrestle.

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Speaker 1: We'll have part two of Steve's response coming up at

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Speaker 1: twenty three minutes after the hour. Today's Strawberry letter subject

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Speaker 1: is his mama? That important? We'll get back into that

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Speaker 1: right after this.

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Speaker 2: You're listening hard Morning show.

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Speaker 1: All right, Come on, Steve, let's recap today's Strawberry letter.

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Speaker 1: The subject is his mama that important?

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Speaker 4: Well, at first I wasn't gonna like the lady, but look,

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Speaker 4: the lady that's getting married kind of has a valid

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Speaker 4: point in this whole thing. She's been a gage three years.

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Speaker 4: They set a wedding date.

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Speaker 3: The dudes.

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Speaker 4: Mama asked her to move the date back because she

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Speaker 4: was renovating her kitchen and won't be in time, won't

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Speaker 4: be ready in time for the wedding. And then but

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Speaker 4: the people won't have no where. The state is coming

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Speaker 4: in town, so she asked him moving back. She got

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Speaker 4: upset with her and told her Mama told the month

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Speaker 4: to step. Mama said that, I mean the mother in law,

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Speaker 4: potential mother in law. Why don't you just have everybody

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Speaker 4: stay in the hotel, She said, ain't nobody got no money,

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Speaker 4: come down here see your little wed and stay in

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Speaker 4: the hotel too, because this is like a poverty decision.

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Speaker 4: We're making a group poverty decision. So they'd have found

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Speaker 4: out three people that can drive from Detroit all the

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Speaker 4: way down here to Kentucky, and they got to figure

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Speaker 4: out how many cars can make it. So it's gonna

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Speaker 4: be three cars coming and it's gonna be eighteen people

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Speaker 4: eighteen people is coming in three cars. Ass ride. It's

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Speaker 4: gonna be a long ass ride right here. Three in

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Speaker 4: the front, three in the back. You ain't been in

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Speaker 4: a car like that alone long time, hat you. It's

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Speaker 4: going to be leting my arm rest up, So Junior,

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Speaker 4: tell all this to let them my arm rest up. Andybody,

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Speaker 4: somebody sitting on that hump, so get on that hump

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Speaker 4: and come on. All right, So now then y'all move

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Speaker 4: a date back. Okay, But then y'all, uh, she had

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Speaker 4: four trees cut down in the backyard, and then you

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Speaker 4: say she went out there being a busy body, tripped

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Speaker 4: over the branch and shat at her knee. Now that

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Speaker 4: was in August of twenty twenty two. She told my

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Speaker 4: boyfriend that she would not be healed by November.

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Speaker 3: Damn.

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Speaker 4: So you fail in August, you already know you ain't

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Speaker 4: gonna be healed by November. Now, I'm just gonna tell

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Speaker 4: you this because I know this type of stuff, and

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Speaker 4: don't ask me how I know. This is a fat

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Speaker 4: person here that fail. Yes, this is a fat person.

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Speaker 4: I'm just trying to tell you when you fall in

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Speaker 4: August and know your ass ain't gonna be healed by November.

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Speaker 3: You already.

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Speaker 4: No, you can't put this much weight on that damn knee.

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Speaker 4: You gonna shatter at that knee again. That's a fat

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Speaker 4: person that fell in the backyard. I don't care what

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Speaker 4: the doctor told her. The doctor knows. She can't put

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Speaker 4: this two eighty on top of the knees now and

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Speaker 4: be ready by November. This knee is shatty. She bedridden.

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Speaker 4: I'm telling you, I know fat people's stuff. I've been

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Speaker 4: my eye family full of fat people, so I know

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Speaker 4: when stuff happened to him. You getting August, September, October, November.

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Speaker 4: That's damn their four monthster healing. She can't get ready

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Speaker 4: by in because she too heavy anyway. So you ran

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Speaker 4: to your mama upset, crying, and your mama went over

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Speaker 4: to the boyfriend's house heat. She's trying to sabotage your

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Speaker 4: sabotized your whining. After the visit, your mama came back

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Speaker 4: talking about girl. This woman right here is everything because

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Speaker 4: she found out that the mother in law was playing

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Speaker 4: on paying for the wedding and everything, so she wanted

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Speaker 4: to have her say so with it. Now, that's a

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Speaker 4: great gift because really the father of the bride by tradition,

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Speaker 4: is supposed to pay for the web. But the lady

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Speaker 4: that wrote the letter may not have a father in

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Speaker 4: her life. I ain't mentioned about her parents paying for

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Speaker 4: the wedding. It's supposed to be the father's responsibility. The

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Speaker 4: mother of the groom that says she'll pay for this

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Speaker 4: whole thing. And so you said, I don't give a

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Speaker 4: damn what she paid for. I don't want her to

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Speaker 4: hold this over our head. My boyfriend did not know

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Speaker 4: about his mom planning to foot the bill and she

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Speaker 4: being nicer controlling.

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Speaker 3: Would we be.

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Speaker 4: Wrong to elow, Yeah, you would be wrong to elow.

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Speaker 4: But I think this is this is a little bit

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Speaker 4: of ego in here. You want to control. It is

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Speaker 4: your day, and understand that it's your day, and you

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Speaker 4: have every right. Surely said it best when you said,

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Speaker 4: is she being nicer controlling? Surely says she's being a

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Speaker 4: little bit of both, and she is. She's being very

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Speaker 4: nice and controlling. But if you just take your ego

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Speaker 4: out of it for a moment, little girl, you got

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Speaker 4: a chance to get the wedding of your dreams, because

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Speaker 4: obviously you ain't got the money for the wed in

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Speaker 4: your dream like her mother and La. No, she don't

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Speaker 4: like her, but she finish foot the bill for this

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Speaker 4: whole thing. You can get to day of your dreams

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Speaker 4: if you just take your ego out of it for

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Speaker 4: a moment, and they'll take the pressure off the boy

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Speaker 4: and all this here, because that's gonna between you and

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Speaker 4: his mama. That's gonna create a riff and y'all starting

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Speaker 4: y'all marriage off with a lot of little bumps over

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Speaker 4: this day. Now. I agree, it's your day and you

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Speaker 4: should have every right to pick a day. But you

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Speaker 4: got to wait on this big lady to heal now,

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Speaker 4: because she ain't gonna be putting no weight on his

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Speaker 4: knee for November. Yeah, because she gonna come down. She

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Speaker 4: don't want to live down there because she put the

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Speaker 4: she fit to buy that dress with that sequence on it.

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Speaker 4: You know that because all mothers of the bride and

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Speaker 4: groom they wear SeaQuest at all pole wedd special occasion. Yeah,

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Speaker 4: that's the poor people. That's poor people outfit, and it's

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Speaker 4: a beautiful outfit. I wore my first sequence jacket. I

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Speaker 4: remember when I first got my first SeaQuest jacket. What

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Speaker 4: it meant to me? I thought, I want an old

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Speaker 4: Jay's dog. You couldn't tell me nothing, so I'll follow you.

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Speaker 4: I would take my ego out of it, don't Elope.

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Speaker 4: You just now you just want to make sure you're

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Speaker 4: controlling the situation. That's just Elope. But I think you'll

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Speaker 4: regret eloping because I think you will deny your mother

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Speaker 4: an opportunity to see her baby go down the aisle.

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Speaker 3: You're gonna take her his.

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Speaker 4: Family away, And yeah, you will have controlled the situation,

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Speaker 4: but you won't have the beautiful pictures, the memories, the video.

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Speaker 4: You know, you pop people like when they cut the cake.

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Speaker 4: They cut them cakes in the little bitty squares so

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Speaker 4: everybody can get a piece Yo yop weining cake will

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Speaker 4: probably be backing by like two hundred and fifty square Listen.

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Speaker 1: Leave your comments on Today's Strawberry Letter on the Instagram

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Speaker 1: at Steve Harvey FM, and check us out on the

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Speaker 1: Strawberry Letter podcast on the Free iHeartRadio app where free

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Speaker 1: never sounded so good. Coming up next to this, Jor

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Speaker 1: Junior is back in the building.

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Speaker 2: With Sports Talk.

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Speaker 1: Right after this, you're listening Hardy Morning Show