1 00:00:00,120 --> 00:00:37,760 Speaker 1: Welcome. You are now listening to the Professional Professional Hey 2 00:00:37,840 --> 00:00:42,880 Speaker 1: are you cool? Cats? And Kiddin's no let me stop playing. 3 00:00:43,440 --> 00:00:48,240 Speaker 1: Hey guys, welcome to this week's episode of the PhD Podcast. 4 00:00:48,760 --> 00:00:51,880 Speaker 1: It's your girl, Ebane and like always, I am super 5 00:00:51,920 --> 00:00:56,080 Speaker 1: excited about this week's episode because child, I am about 6 00:00:56,120 --> 00:00:59,880 Speaker 1: to get in my bag. But before we begin, let's 7 00:00:59,880 --> 00:01:02,880 Speaker 1: do some housekeeping. Please make sure to follow me on 8 00:01:03,000 --> 00:01:06,880 Speaker 1: Instagram at the Professional home Girl, at the PhD Podcast, 9 00:01:07,000 --> 00:01:09,880 Speaker 1: and last but not least, at Eben a Beauty. Please 10 00:01:09,920 --> 00:01:12,520 Speaker 1: make sure to follow me on Twitter at th h 11 00:01:12,640 --> 00:01:16,320 Speaker 1: E PhD on the score, and last but not at least, 12 00:01:16,319 --> 00:01:19,679 Speaker 1: make sure you show the website some love at www 13 00:01:19,800 --> 00:01:24,919 Speaker 1: dot the PhD podcast dot com. If you are listening 14 00:01:24,959 --> 00:01:27,320 Speaker 1: to this on an iPhone, please make sure to leave 15 00:01:27,360 --> 00:01:30,320 Speaker 1: a five star review at the bottom of this episode. 16 00:01:30,560 --> 00:01:31,800 Speaker 1: Or you have to do is just scroll all the 17 00:01:31,800 --> 00:01:34,040 Speaker 1: way down and you will be able to see write 18 00:01:34,080 --> 00:01:36,400 Speaker 1: a review, or you can just leave a five star 19 00:01:37,080 --> 00:01:39,520 Speaker 1: this um. The podcast is growing and I have so 20 00:01:39,600 --> 00:01:42,200 Speaker 1: much in store, but I cannot grow it without my 21 00:01:42,240 --> 00:01:46,880 Speaker 1: professional home girls. Oh and shout out to the niggas 22 00:01:46,880 --> 00:01:49,080 Speaker 1: that listen to the PSHD podcast. Thank you all. For 23 00:01:49,120 --> 00:01:52,080 Speaker 1: holding it down as well. All right, so this is 24 00:01:52,080 --> 00:01:55,680 Speaker 1: gonna be a solo episode, so please get ready because 25 00:01:55,760 --> 00:01:57,360 Speaker 1: I really want to share what y'all has been on 26 00:01:57,440 --> 00:02:00,600 Speaker 1: my heart. I hope by me being trans parents would 27 00:02:00,640 --> 00:02:04,240 Speaker 1: help you to begin your journey on embracing your own 28 00:02:04,320 --> 00:02:07,240 Speaker 1: higher self and to never forget to always remain solid. 29 00:02:08,840 --> 00:02:11,080 Speaker 1: So I always been a spiritual person, and at a 30 00:02:11,200 --> 00:02:14,320 Speaker 1: very early age, my beloved Nana would always tell me, 31 00:02:14,840 --> 00:02:18,000 Speaker 1: don't take any Wooden Nichols. So of course as a kid, 32 00:02:18,040 --> 00:02:20,919 Speaker 1: I would be like child Nicolas Ain't wouldn't. But as 33 00:02:20,960 --> 00:02:24,119 Speaker 1: I got older, I learned to understand what she really meant, 34 00:02:24,280 --> 00:02:28,360 Speaker 1: and now it is one of my daily affirmations. I 35 00:02:28,440 --> 00:02:32,120 Speaker 1: was an emotional, abusive relationship and it took someone from 36 00:02:32,160 --> 00:02:36,160 Speaker 1: outside to let me know what I was experienced. I 37 00:02:36,200 --> 00:02:39,480 Speaker 1: had just got through arguing with this nigga via text, 38 00:02:39,520 --> 00:02:41,840 Speaker 1: and I remember my home girl Noodles, who was in town, 39 00:02:41,880 --> 00:02:44,720 Speaker 1: shout out to her, and I went to her hotel 40 00:02:44,800 --> 00:02:47,560 Speaker 1: room and I broke down. I couldn't believe that I 41 00:02:47,600 --> 00:02:49,880 Speaker 1: was trying my best to be the best for someone 42 00:02:49,960 --> 00:02:51,840 Speaker 1: that wasn't even trying to be the best for me. 43 00:02:52,440 --> 00:02:55,960 Speaker 1: Like that ship sounds so fucking crazy, right, So to 44 00:02:56,000 --> 00:02:59,399 Speaker 1: be with someone that constantly reminded me of my temporary shortcomings, 45 00:03:00,360 --> 00:03:02,720 Speaker 1: constantly reminded me that I wasn't good enough and told 46 00:03:02,720 --> 00:03:04,600 Speaker 1: me that if it wasn't for him and I got 47 00:03:04,600 --> 00:03:07,239 Speaker 1: this on in a text message, I wouldn't have gotten 48 00:03:07,280 --> 00:03:11,000 Speaker 1: as far as I did. Nigga. Please let me tell 49 00:03:11,040 --> 00:03:13,840 Speaker 1: y'all something. Never let nigga play you and take credit 50 00:03:13,880 --> 00:03:15,720 Speaker 1: for the work that you did to the reason why 51 00:03:15,760 --> 00:03:17,680 Speaker 1: this nigga thought that he could play me is because 52 00:03:17,720 --> 00:03:20,760 Speaker 1: I allowed it to continue. No one can continue anything 53 00:03:20,800 --> 00:03:23,560 Speaker 1: with you if you don't allow it. We see I couldn't. 54 00:03:24,040 --> 00:03:26,080 Speaker 1: I can't give him or anyone else all the credit 55 00:03:26,120 --> 00:03:28,040 Speaker 1: for trying to play me because I play a part 56 00:03:28,320 --> 00:03:31,320 Speaker 1: and playing myself as well. See, I didn't love myself 57 00:03:31,320 --> 00:03:34,720 Speaker 1: deeply enough because if I did, niggas that couldn't match 58 00:03:34,720 --> 00:03:36,600 Speaker 1: the energy that I had for myself would have it 59 00:03:36,680 --> 00:03:39,320 Speaker 1: even tried me and I wouldn't have even entertained it. 60 00:03:40,120 --> 00:03:43,280 Speaker 1: So after that breakup, I constantly were hearing my nana 61 00:03:43,600 --> 00:03:46,640 Speaker 1: constantly telling me not to take any wood nickels and 62 00:03:46,680 --> 00:03:50,840 Speaker 1: to stay solid. What does stay in solid mean when 63 00:03:50,880 --> 00:03:53,440 Speaker 1: you love yourself? So deep and you move with love, 64 00:03:53,560 --> 00:03:57,400 Speaker 1: you move with integrity and honesty. There will always be resistance, 65 00:03:57,640 --> 00:04:00,240 Speaker 1: but never let that resistance knock you off your game. 66 00:04:00,520 --> 00:04:02,000 Speaker 1: And for those people that are in your life for 67 00:04:02,080 --> 00:04:04,760 Speaker 1: a season, they would try you because they can't reach 68 00:04:04,800 --> 00:04:07,280 Speaker 1: the standard that you set for your life. See, we 69 00:04:07,320 --> 00:04:09,560 Speaker 1: are all on this path, and well some of us 70 00:04:10,280 --> 00:04:13,440 Speaker 1: on being the best version of ourselves or just embracing 71 00:04:13,440 --> 00:04:16,120 Speaker 1: the hi yourself. But you can't lose yourself or what 72 00:04:16,200 --> 00:04:19,279 Speaker 1: you believe in for the sake of the journey. And 73 00:04:19,320 --> 00:04:21,880 Speaker 1: no disrespect to the pent of niggas as listening to 74 00:04:21,920 --> 00:04:25,080 Speaker 1: this right now. But to my ladies, my professional home girls, 75 00:04:25,480 --> 00:04:30,680 Speaker 1: I say this so many times. Focus on yourself. Gee, 76 00:04:31,200 --> 00:04:33,159 Speaker 1: we were taught at such a young age to dream 77 00:04:33,200 --> 00:04:35,160 Speaker 1: about our wedding day, but we were not taught to 78 00:04:35,240 --> 00:04:37,400 Speaker 1: dream of having a full life. I know in the 79 00:04:37,440 --> 00:04:39,320 Speaker 1: Bible it says that when a man finds a wife, 80 00:04:39,320 --> 00:04:42,240 Speaker 1: he finds a good thing. But I always remember, ladies, 81 00:04:42,279 --> 00:04:45,560 Speaker 1: that you are still the prize. Not only are you chosen, 82 00:04:45,600 --> 00:04:48,360 Speaker 1: but you are the chooser, never allowing niggas to make 83 00:04:48,400 --> 00:04:51,239 Speaker 1: you think anything else. I pray that you all would 84 00:04:51,240 --> 00:04:53,400 Speaker 1: know that you would be okay on your own and 85 00:04:53,440 --> 00:04:56,560 Speaker 1: reminded daily of your strength. I pray that you are 86 00:04:56,600 --> 00:04:59,120 Speaker 1: not afraid to know your worth. It's so easy to 87 00:04:59,160 --> 00:05:01,200 Speaker 1: work up a whole, but it's so hard to maintain 88 00:05:01,200 --> 00:05:03,640 Speaker 1: a good woman because she knows her work, and niggas 89 00:05:03,640 --> 00:05:06,000 Speaker 1: know they can't introduce her to a bob. They can't 90 00:05:06,080 --> 00:05:11,480 Speaker 1: maintain okay child, And no shade to the holes out 91 00:05:11,480 --> 00:05:13,640 Speaker 1: there either, because you know I love holes and how 92 00:05:13,720 --> 00:05:17,000 Speaker 1: his life. But niggas be having a fucking nerve to 93 00:05:17,120 --> 00:05:20,160 Speaker 1: play you in your temporary show comments, but they expect 94 00:05:20,160 --> 00:05:23,920 Speaker 1: you to turn felons, cheatas community dick and liars and 95 00:05:23,960 --> 00:05:27,400 Speaker 1: to fucking kings. I get the funk out of here, ship. 96 00:05:29,440 --> 00:05:31,919 Speaker 1: You know. Being on this journey of embracing my higher 97 00:05:31,960 --> 00:05:34,760 Speaker 1: self has taught me so much, y'all. It's like one 98 00:05:34,800 --> 00:05:37,000 Speaker 1: day I woke up and I really felt that peace, 99 00:05:37,080 --> 00:05:39,680 Speaker 1: like I felt, I felt like Ebanet, I felt like me, 100 00:05:40,080 --> 00:05:42,400 Speaker 1: and I would not be of service to you if 101 00:05:42,440 --> 00:05:45,080 Speaker 1: I didn't share the else that taught me so many lessons. 102 00:05:45,440 --> 00:05:48,080 Speaker 1: One thing that I constantly pray for on my journey, 103 00:05:48,320 --> 00:05:50,760 Speaker 1: and I still pray to this day, is to continue 104 00:05:50,800 --> 00:05:53,280 Speaker 1: to live in my truth and to be more understanding, 105 00:05:53,320 --> 00:05:56,080 Speaker 1: and stead of being understood, I understand now that I 106 00:05:56,120 --> 00:05:58,760 Speaker 1: have so much to accomplish. I am constantly walking in 107 00:05:58,880 --> 00:06:01,120 Speaker 1: my purpose and I know I am walking to my 108 00:06:01,160 --> 00:06:03,320 Speaker 1: purpose because I get emotional when I speak on it. 109 00:06:04,000 --> 00:06:05,760 Speaker 1: That ask what I do and who I do it for? 110 00:06:05,920 --> 00:06:07,960 Speaker 1: And I do it for you all, professional home girls. 111 00:06:08,240 --> 00:06:10,680 Speaker 1: I'm always going to keep it real with you. One 112 00:06:10,720 --> 00:06:12,800 Speaker 1: of my favorite lyrics from jay Z is whole did 113 00:06:12,839 --> 00:06:14,720 Speaker 1: that so you don't have to go through that? And 114 00:06:14,800 --> 00:06:18,000 Speaker 1: that embodies with the professional home girl stand for and 115 00:06:18,080 --> 00:06:20,960 Speaker 1: I really felt that ship. We can't heal what we 116 00:06:21,000 --> 00:06:24,320 Speaker 1: don't reveal. Y'all, stay solid and who you are through 117 00:06:24,360 --> 00:06:28,080 Speaker 1: it all the good, the bad, and the ugly. Never 118 00:06:28,160 --> 00:06:31,440 Speaker 1: be afraid of not knowing, but don't take any wooden 119 00:06:31,520 --> 00:06:34,640 Speaker 1: nickels while learning. Thank you for coming to my TED 120 00:06:34,800 --> 00:06:35,920 Speaker 1: talk later.