WEBVTT - Disability Is Not the End, It’s the Start of a New Story

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<v Speaker 1>Personally Oldsman.

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<v Speaker 2>One of my favorite parts of getting to do this

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<v Speaker 2>podcast is to share stories in topics of things that

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<v Speaker 2>either haven't impacted me or I can't speak from personal experience,

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<v Speaker 2>because it means I get to learn with all of

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<v Speaker 2>you as these guests come on. And that was the

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<v Speaker 2>case last week, and it's the case this week. Sarah

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<v Speaker 2>Todd Hammer is a disability advocate and author. She's twenty

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<v Speaker 2>three years old, and we'll share her story of being

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<v Speaker 2>disabled and walk us through the best ways to be

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<v Speaker 2>an advocate. You're gonna love this one, So let's do this.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm here right now with Sarah Todd Hammer. She's an

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<v Speaker 2>author and a disability advocate, and I'm so excited to

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<v Speaker 2>hear her story and have her on.

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<v Speaker 3>Hi, Sarah, how are you, Hie?

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<v Speaker 1>Hi Morgan, thank you so much for having me on.

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<v Speaker 3>I'm so excited to have you on. When I had

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<v Speaker 3>asked to have you on.

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<v Speaker 2>I watched your personal documentary Pressing Buttons short film on

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<v Speaker 2>your YouTube.

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<v Speaker 1>Yes, thanks so much for watching.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, and I would really just love to start here

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<v Speaker 2>by you sharing your story because that is a huge

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<v Speaker 2>part of who you are, and that's the reason we're

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<v Speaker 2>on and talking about this today of course.

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<v Speaker 1>Hi everyone. I'm Sarah Todd. I go by Sarah Todd

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<v Speaker 1>or st is a nickname, and I'm twenty three from

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<v Speaker 1>Atlanta and I've had a physical disability since i was

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<v Speaker 1>eight years old. I actually had my fifteen year disability

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<v Speaker 1>anniversary on April nineteenth. Related emotional anniversary, yes, I view

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<v Speaker 1>it as mostly like a happy day. I try to

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<v Speaker 1>do something fun on that day if I can.

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<v Speaker 3>Did you do something fun for this?

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<v Speaker 1>Yes? Yes, my friend was visiting actually, which wasn't planned

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<v Speaker 1>to specifically be on that day, but it just so

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<v Speaker 1>happened to be. So my friend from college was visiting.

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<v Speaker 1>We spent the weekend together, so that was super fun.

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<v Speaker 1>I had a great fifteen year anniversary.

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<v Speaker 2>Love that, and I love that you celebrate that every

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<v Speaker 2>year because it puts a positive light on something that happened.

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<v Speaker 1>Yes, I like to, as we'll get into, I'm sure,

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<v Speaker 1>I like to always view the positive sides of things

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<v Speaker 1>while still letting myself acknowledge the sad, emotional, or challenging

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<v Speaker 1>things because it's not healthy to ignore them.

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<v Speaker 2>So I try to have exactly correct and we totally

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<v Speaker 2>won't get into that, Okay, go on, I just.

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<v Speaker 1>Want to acknowledge, thank you. Yes. So on April nineteen,

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<v Speaker 1>twenty ten, so about fifteen years ago was when I

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<v Speaker 1>became disabled and I was at ballet class. My disability

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<v Speaker 1>happened to occur in ballet, but it's not related to ballet.

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<v Speaker 1>I was a really avid dancer, loved ballet, and I

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<v Speaker 1>was in my class try on my dance recital costume

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<v Speaker 1>for upcoming recital, and all of a sudden got a

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<v Speaker 1>really bad head and neck ache, which was so bad

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<v Speaker 1>that I was gonna go home, which was unusual for me.

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<v Speaker 1>I usually wasn't like that. I never wanted to leave class.

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<v Speaker 1>But on my way out of the studio to go home,

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<v Speaker 1>I reached down to adjust my ballet tights and my

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<v Speaker 1>arms and hands just stopped working out of nowhere. Obviously,

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<v Speaker 1>my mom and I didn't go home once that happened.

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<v Speaker 1>I was flown by a helicopter to the nearest hospital

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<v Speaker 1>and I was there for six hours that night. Didn't

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<v Speaker 1>receive any treatment except they gave me motrin, which I

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<v Speaker 1>could have gotten at home. They didn't do anything, and

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<v Speaker 1>they sent me home after six.

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<v Speaker 3>Hours and find me in a helicopter.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, they'd flown me in and then sent me home,

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<v Speaker 1>even though my mom was begging them to do something,

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<v Speaker 1>asking for a different doctor, asking if I had a

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<v Speaker 1>brain tumor, if I had a stroke, or various different things,

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<v Speaker 1>and they just didn't listen. So wasted our time there.

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<v Speaker 1>Was sent home really late at night, around eleven midnight,

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<v Speaker 1>and the next morning woke up and then couldn't move

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<v Speaker 1>my legs. So all in a matter of sixteen hours,

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<v Speaker 1>I became paralyzed from the neck down, completely out of

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<v Speaker 1>the blue.

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<v Speaker 3>How old are you at this time?

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<v Speaker 1>I was eight, so very young and obviously very scared.

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<v Speaker 1>But when I was sent home, I remember the doctor

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<v Speaker 1>told my mom, if she's not better in the morning,

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<v Speaker 1>bring her back. So I was like, okay, then he

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<v Speaker 1>thinks I'll be better in the morning. When I woke

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<v Speaker 1>up in the morning, I was excited because I was like, Oh,

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<v Speaker 1>everything's gonna be fine because he'd said that. So as

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<v Speaker 1>an eight year old, that's how your mind thinks. So yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>So it was completely paralyzed. In the nicktown. We went

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<v Speaker 1>back to the hospital. I was there for two months.

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<v Speaker 1>I had an MRI done that showed a spinal cord

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<v Speaker 1>injury from C two to T one on the spinal cord,

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<v Speaker 1>so very large section of my spinal cord was damaged,

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<v Speaker 1>and I regained the ability to walk in the hospital, thankfully,

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<v Speaker 1>but was left with partial paralysis in my arms and hands,

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<v Speaker 1>which is what I still have today. I have a

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<v Speaker 1>really unique disability because most people don't just have paralysis

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<v Speaker 1>in their arms and hands. Usually if they have that,

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<v Speaker 1>they're also in a wheelchair. But I'm walking, so a

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<v Speaker 1>lot of people actually don't realize that I have a disability,

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<v Speaker 1>even though my disability affects my day to day life.

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<v Speaker 1>So that's how everything happened.

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<v Speaker 2>And that was the wild thing when I was watching

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<v Speaker 2>your documentary was just how much.

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<v Speaker 3>This is something so random?

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<v Speaker 2>But I remember I broke my tailbone, and I didn't

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<v Speaker 2>realize how much that.

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<v Speaker 3>Impacted my life every single day.

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<v Speaker 2>I cannot simply imagine what it would be like for

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<v Speaker 2>someone who doesn't have the use of their arms in

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<v Speaker 2>their hands to do every single thing they need to

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<v Speaker 2>do in their day to day life.

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<v Speaker 3>And you went to college.

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<v Speaker 1>Yes, how we could talk about that too. Yeah, I'm

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<v Speaker 1>sure breaking your tailbone was so painful.

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<v Speaker 2>I did it rollerblady with him five minutes and I'm like,

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<v Speaker 2>Why did I do this?

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<v Speaker 3>Why did I do that to myself?

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<v Speaker 2>But if I think it gave me a perspective that

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<v Speaker 2>I would have never had, because you just don't realize

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<v Speaker 2>how important every single piece of your body is to

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<v Speaker 2>making everything work.

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<v Speaker 1>Yes, until you can't use a certain part of your body,

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<v Speaker 1>that's totally the case. But what's interesting is since I

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<v Speaker 1>was eight, I feel like I just had all of

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<v Speaker 1>this happen to me, and then I just moved on

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<v Speaker 1>in a way. Yeah, it's hard to explain because looking

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<v Speaker 1>back on it, I recognize that I very much just

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<v Speaker 1>wanted to go back to how things were before. So

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<v Speaker 1>when I went home from the hospital, I was like,

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<v Speaker 1>all right, I'm home. Everything should be normal now. But

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<v Speaker 1>then I needed help feeding myself, and I needed help

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<v Speaker 1>getting dressed, and I wasn't going back to school, and

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<v Speaker 1>so then you're like, oh, it's not how it used

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<v Speaker 1>to be. But I think kids are just very resilient,

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<v Speaker 1>So that actually helped me. If I had been older

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<v Speaker 1>and this had happened, I maybe wouldn't have adjusted as well.

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<v Speaker 1>So I'm old enough that I remember it and I

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<v Speaker 1>remember what it was like to be non disabled, But

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<v Speaker 1>I also was young enough that it helped me adjust.

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<v Speaker 2>Do you look back on that time of your life

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<v Speaker 2>and even the days, months, years that followed and remember

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<v Speaker 2>a lot of emotional moments in trying to understand why

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<v Speaker 2>all of the sudden this would happen.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I feel like I was just very focused on

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<v Speaker 1>going back to normal, and I didn't really let myself

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<v Speaker 1>sit with what had happened too much, which then made

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<v Speaker 1>everything come up later as I got older and realized,

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<v Speaker 1>oh wow, that happened, and I can't even believe that happened.

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<v Speaker 1>For example, certain memories from the hospital, I know looking

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<v Speaker 1>back on it that I was having like panic attacks

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<v Speaker 1>and anxiety, but as a child, I didn't know how

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<v Speaker 1>to share that with doctors, and they didn't know what

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<v Speaker 1>was happening, or they would just tell me you're okay.

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<v Speaker 1>I know that you're fine because you're talking things like that,

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<v Speaker 1>And so it's difficult because as a child, I was

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<v Speaker 1>scared of certain things, scared of medical procedures and all

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<v Speaker 1>of those things. But I wasn't able to comprehend this

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<v Speaker 1>was just a life altering event necessarily, and it was

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<v Speaker 1>more like, Okay, I'm getting through this. I'm out of

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<v Speaker 1>the hospital now, I'm at home. Oh, but now I'm

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<v Speaker 1>doing therapy for eight hours a day. Then I'm done

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<v Speaker 1>with that after this month, and then it's like you're

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<v Speaker 1>just going through the motions. That's more so, I was

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<v Speaker 1>thinking as a kid, dreading those things until those things

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<v Speaker 1>ended and then I could just live my life with

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<v Speaker 1>my disability without like the scary medical things.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I would imagine that would come with some trauma

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<v Speaker 2>of medical and understanding, especially been to you so young,

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<v Speaker 2>and especially that first even hearing you talk back that story,

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<v Speaker 2>that first moment of them being like she's fine, give

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<v Speaker 2>her a motrin, and you're like, I'm obviously not fine,

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<v Speaker 2>but okay.

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<v Speaker 1>Yes I knew I wasn't fine. But then I'm like,

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<v Speaker 1>he's a doctor, so as an eight year old, you're

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<v Speaker 1>going to trust the doctor. And then thinking too, looking

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<v Speaker 1>back on it, how powerless my mom had become. Because

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<v Speaker 1>when you're fighting with a doctor, you can't do anything.

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<v Speaker 1>They kick you out of the hospital, you can't stay,

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<v Speaker 1>they refuse to give you a new doctor. And that

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<v Speaker 1>makes me sad thinking about that too, how that happens

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<v Speaker 1>to not only just me and my mom, but so

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<v Speaker 1>many other people all the time. And I don't know

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<v Speaker 1>why it's a very common occurrence. Unfortunately, it very much is.

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<v Speaker 2>And that's a gosh story for a different day, I suppose,

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<v Speaker 2>because that has things.

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<v Speaker 3>All on its own.

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<v Speaker 2>But something that I was thinking about to when you

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<v Speaker 2>do return to normal life post this event happening, were

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<v Speaker 2>you worried about what other kids might think? Were you

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<v Speaker 2>worried about what those interactions were going to look like?

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<v Speaker 2>Did you have bad ones? Or was it a relatively

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<v Speaker 2>good experience for you.

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<v Speaker 1>I don't know if I was necessarily worrying what people

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<v Speaker 1>would think. I don't remember that. I feel like i've,

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<v Speaker 1>thankfully he's actually been a very confident person. So my

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<v Speaker 1>fears are really less about what people are going to

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<v Speaker 1>think of me and more about, oh, what's going to

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<v Speaker 1>happen if I have a fear, and how am I

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<v Speaker 1>going to react or how am I going to take

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<v Speaker 1>control or fix things? So I don't really remember worrying

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<v Speaker 1>about it. But then I do remember when I finally

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<v Speaker 1>went back to school, so I had finished second grade.

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<v Speaker 1>It was April when this happened, so I'd taken the

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<v Speaker 1>standard grised testing and they just let me finish. Third

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<v Speaker 1>grade came up. I did that at home so I

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<v Speaker 1>could focus on physical and occupational therapy. And then for

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<v Speaker 1>fourth grade, I returned back to the school building and

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<v Speaker 1>I had a full time aid with me to help

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<v Speaker 1>me with school supplies like writing, getting lunch out, doing

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<v Speaker 1>the bathroom door, stuff like that. And I don't remember

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<v Speaker 1>being scared of what people would think of having her

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<v Speaker 1>with me, but I do remember things definitely were different,

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<v Speaker 1>Like there was one instance where I knew one of

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<v Speaker 1>my friends had a birthday party and I wasn't invited,

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<v Speaker 1>and she told me that I could have gotten hurt

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<v Speaker 1>because they had a pinata, and I knew that wouldn't

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<v Speaker 1>have happened pre disability. There was one instance where i'd

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<v Speaker 1>one of my friends come over to my house after

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<v Speaker 1>school in fourth grade, and as she and I were

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<v Speaker 1>going up to my room, I heard her mom ask

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<v Speaker 1>mine if what I had was contagious. Wow, And that

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<v Speaker 1>stuck with me because it made me realize, oh, like,

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<v Speaker 1>she's worried about her daughter hanging out with me, even

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<v Speaker 1>though we were in the same class at school. And

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<v Speaker 1>I do remember friends, like, you know, I had a

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<v Speaker 1>best friend before school or before my dis ability, who

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<v Speaker 1>was a boy. And then when I returned to school.

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<v Speaker 1>We were in fourth grade instead of second grade, and

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<v Speaker 1>he didn't want to hang out with me as much,

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<v Speaker 1>probably because he was like getting older and becoming a

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<v Speaker 1>cool boy. And that was different to me because I

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<v Speaker 1>was like, oh, we were best friends when this happened.

0:12:17.400 --> 0:12:19.040
<v Speaker 1>Now you don't want to sit with me at lunch.

0:12:19.760 --> 0:12:25.160
<v Speaker 1>So definitely things that happened that were upsetting, but that

0:12:25.320 --> 0:12:27.560
<v Speaker 1>I didn't necessarily worry about because I didn't know what

0:12:27.600 --> 0:12:28.240
<v Speaker 1>to expect.

0:12:29.000 --> 0:12:32.240
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, and that's hard too because you're also a kid,

0:12:32.480 --> 0:12:37.120
<v Speaker 2>and that happens usually to kids too, So then you're

0:12:37.160 --> 0:12:39.040
<v Speaker 2>having probably this, Okay, is it happening?

0:12:39.120 --> 0:12:42.120
<v Speaker 3>Did I do something? You're not the way that I'm

0:12:42.160 --> 0:12:44.760
<v Speaker 3>hearing you talk to you. This is just part of

0:12:44.800 --> 0:12:47.520
<v Speaker 3>who you are, as it should be. That is how

0:12:47.559 --> 0:12:48.040
<v Speaker 3>it should be.

0:12:48.160 --> 0:12:51.760
<v Speaker 2>But to people who don't have disabilities, they see it

0:12:51.800 --> 0:12:52.680
<v Speaker 2>as a disability.

0:12:52.679 --> 0:12:55.120
<v Speaker 3>They treat you differently, which is the whole reason we're

0:12:55.120 --> 0:12:57.080
<v Speaker 3>having you on because we don't want people to do that.

0:12:57.640 --> 0:13:01.320
<v Speaker 1>Yes, even that quickly, it just became who I was,

0:13:01.480 --> 0:13:03.760
<v Speaker 1>even in fourth grade. It only been a year and

0:13:03.840 --> 0:13:07.000
<v Speaker 1>a half or so less than that, and I was

0:13:07.040 --> 0:13:11.000
<v Speaker 1>already like, oh, this is just my life and so

0:13:11.160 --> 0:13:13.520
<v Speaker 1>then when I was treated a little bit differently, it

0:13:13.640 --> 0:13:16.560
<v Speaker 1>was almost confusing because I was like, why what's different?

0:13:17.320 --> 0:13:18.880
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, you're like to me, I'm still me?

0:13:19.559 --> 0:13:22.079
<v Speaker 2>Yes, still who the person that the only thing that's

0:13:22.200 --> 0:13:23.160
<v Speaker 2>changed is for me?

0:13:23.920 --> 0:13:27.600
<v Speaker 1>Yes, exactly, not as much for the other students and friends.

0:13:27.640 --> 0:13:29.680
<v Speaker 1>It was my life that had changed.

0:13:30.960 --> 0:13:33.400
<v Speaker 2>You were talking about in that video too, And maybe

0:13:33.400 --> 0:13:36.680
<v Speaker 2>there's other things that you can pinpoint, But what can

0:13:36.760 --> 0:13:40.559
<v Speaker 2>this disability look like for you that people may not realize?

0:13:40.679 --> 0:13:43.959
<v Speaker 2>Because I do think that helps them understand the things

0:13:44.000 --> 0:13:46.680
<v Speaker 2>that you're going through while also being able to treat

0:13:46.679 --> 0:13:49.680
<v Speaker 2>you normally. When we understand things better, we can understand

0:13:49.679 --> 0:13:50.760
<v Speaker 2>how to interact better.

0:13:51.120 --> 0:13:56.400
<v Speaker 1>Yes, something I've been exploring a lot is how I

0:13:56.440 --> 0:14:00.920
<v Speaker 1>want to be seen and then how I've realized other

0:14:01.000 --> 0:14:04.800
<v Speaker 1>people see me and not in a looks type of

0:14:04.880 --> 0:14:09.000
<v Speaker 1>way or anything like that, just about like how my

0:14:09.120 --> 0:14:14.160
<v Speaker 1>disability makes itself known. Because I used to describe myself

0:14:14.160 --> 0:14:17.120
<v Speaker 1>as having an invisible disability, and I talked about that

0:14:17.160 --> 0:14:19.800
<v Speaker 1>a little bit in my short film because I had

0:14:19.960 --> 0:14:22.640
<v Speaker 1>just assumed that when people met me, they had no

0:14:22.720 --> 0:14:26.320
<v Speaker 1>idea that I had a disability based on just like

0:14:26.440 --> 0:14:28.560
<v Speaker 1>the interactions i'd had with people I would meet, I

0:14:28.600 --> 0:14:31.680
<v Speaker 1>felt like they had no clue. And I think a

0:14:31.720 --> 0:14:34.840
<v Speaker 1>lot of people don't know it, but then a lot

0:14:34.840 --> 0:14:38.040
<v Speaker 1>of people do. And when I was in college, I

0:14:38.040 --> 0:14:40.720
<v Speaker 1>took a class that was a disability studies class and

0:14:40.760 --> 0:14:46.320
<v Speaker 1>we explored invisibility and visibility of disability, and I realized

0:14:46.360 --> 0:14:51.080
<v Speaker 1>that this is a way more nuanced topic than people realize.

0:14:51.680 --> 0:14:55.040
<v Speaker 1>And so the things I have thought about, like even

0:14:55.160 --> 0:14:57.480
<v Speaker 1>back in high school, like I wrote an essay just

0:14:57.600 --> 0:15:01.480
<v Speaker 1>for fun called what you Don't See, and it was

0:15:01.560 --> 0:15:06.040
<v Speaker 1>directed towards my classmates, just in general, and it was

0:15:06.080 --> 0:15:08.760
<v Speaker 1>all about how my mom got me ready for school

0:15:08.760 --> 0:15:11.320
<v Speaker 1>by helping me put on shoes, helping me get dressed,

0:15:11.840 --> 0:15:14.880
<v Speaker 1>putting my hair in a braid or a bun, packing

0:15:14.920 --> 0:15:17.880
<v Speaker 1>my lunch for me. Someone drove me, even when I

0:15:17.920 --> 0:15:20.120
<v Speaker 1>was in tenth, eleventh, and twelfth grade and everyone else

0:15:20.200 --> 0:15:23.720
<v Speaker 1>was driving themselves. I show up to school looking super

0:15:23.720 --> 0:15:27.160
<v Speaker 1>put together, just like everybody else, but nobody saw what

0:15:27.280 --> 0:15:30.400
<v Speaker 1>it took to get me there. So that essay was

0:15:30.440 --> 0:15:32.680
<v Speaker 1>all about that what you don't see, You don't see

0:15:32.680 --> 0:15:34.920
<v Speaker 1>all of these things that go into my disability, but

0:15:34.920 --> 0:15:38.720
<v Speaker 1>they're there. But that doesn't mean they don't exist. So

0:15:38.800 --> 0:15:42.400
<v Speaker 1>I've actually found it very validating to refer to myself

0:15:42.440 --> 0:15:45.840
<v Speaker 1>as having a visible disability, because if I don't, I'm

0:15:45.920 --> 0:15:48.560
<v Speaker 1>centering how other people see me and not how I

0:15:48.600 --> 0:15:52.040
<v Speaker 1>see myself. So that's something I've been exploring. I found

0:15:52.080 --> 0:15:56.720
<v Speaker 1>it very helpful, honestly, to realize, no, it's not invisible.

0:15:57.000 --> 0:15:59.200
<v Speaker 1>It's just that people don't see these things, and that's

0:15:59.280 --> 0:16:01.400
<v Speaker 1>not their fault. That's just how it is.

0:16:04.400 --> 0:16:06.640
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, it's cool for you because growth is such a

0:16:06.640 --> 0:16:10.480
<v Speaker 2>beautiful thing, right when you can understand yourself better and

0:16:10.520 --> 0:16:13.480
<v Speaker 2>you're in those I remember.

0:16:13.280 --> 0:16:15.640
<v Speaker 3>My twenties and they're not long ago. I'm only thirty one,

0:16:15.760 --> 0:16:16.840
<v Speaker 3>but I do remember my.

0:16:16.840 --> 0:16:21.560
<v Speaker 2>Twenties being such formative years where I understood so much

0:16:21.600 --> 0:16:25.200
<v Speaker 2>more about myself than I ever knew that I needed

0:16:25.200 --> 0:16:29.200
<v Speaker 2>to learn. You're at that prime time where everything is

0:16:29.200 --> 0:16:30.440
<v Speaker 2>just starting to fall into.

0:16:30.280 --> 0:16:33.280
<v Speaker 3>Place and you're understanding and it's so fun.

0:16:33.360 --> 0:16:36.920
<v Speaker 2>It's also terrifying because so much of what you thought

0:16:36.960 --> 0:16:38.320
<v Speaker 2>you knew is not the same.

0:16:39.120 --> 0:16:41.680
<v Speaker 1>Yes, I know, I love this age. I love being

0:16:41.720 --> 0:16:45.440
<v Speaker 1>twenty three. You can literally feel your brain developing and

0:16:45.600 --> 0:16:48.200
<v Speaker 1>you understanding things more, and it is fascinating.

0:16:48.600 --> 0:16:50.480
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, I think they sound on the internet. My frontal

0:16:50.520 --> 0:16:51.600
<v Speaker 3>lobe has just developed.

0:16:52.120 --> 0:16:54.440
<v Speaker 1>It's so true, even compared to freshman year of college,

0:16:54.440 --> 0:16:57.640
<v Speaker 1>and you grow so much in college. Even by sophomore year,

0:16:57.640 --> 0:17:00.560
<v Speaker 1>I was so much different than freshman year. So much

0:17:00.600 --> 0:17:03.240
<v Speaker 1>growth happens and I love it. But it can be

0:17:03.320 --> 0:17:04.959
<v Speaker 1>challenging too, But overall I love it.

0:17:05.720 --> 0:17:08.719
<v Speaker 2>And speaking of college, you did go to college. You

0:17:08.760 --> 0:17:09.960
<v Speaker 2>graduated last year.

0:17:10.680 --> 0:17:12.480
<v Speaker 1>I can't believe it's been almost a year.

0:17:13.160 --> 0:17:15.240
<v Speaker 2>Which it trust me, it keeps getting further and further

0:17:15.280 --> 0:17:17.240
<v Speaker 2>away from me when I see that, like, holy crap,

0:17:17.280 --> 0:17:20.360
<v Speaker 2>that was so long ago. But this is something that

0:17:20.600 --> 0:17:22.760
<v Speaker 2>you always said you knew you'd do.

0:17:22.920 --> 0:17:23.960
<v Speaker 3>You you can.

0:17:23.800 --> 0:17:25.119
<v Speaker 2>Tell it in your voice, in the way that you

0:17:25.119 --> 0:17:26.840
<v Speaker 2>talk about things that you're very driven and you were

0:17:26.880 --> 0:17:29.679
<v Speaker 2>going to accomplish the things that you wanted to accomplish.

0:17:29.760 --> 0:17:33.480
<v Speaker 2>But is there things on the flip side of college

0:17:33.680 --> 0:17:36.200
<v Speaker 2>where you're like, oh, that's something I'm never going to

0:17:36.240 --> 0:17:36.880
<v Speaker 2>be able to do.

0:17:37.600 --> 0:17:39.320
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I definitely always knew it's going to go to

0:17:39.359 --> 0:17:42.040
<v Speaker 1>college because I knew I wanted to do that. There

0:17:42.040 --> 0:17:44.320
<v Speaker 1>are some things I know I'm never going to be

0:17:44.359 --> 0:17:48.280
<v Speaker 1>able to do, but I don't really care necessarily, see

0:17:48.320 --> 0:17:51.240
<v Speaker 1>I love this. Yeah, Like, I'm never going to be

0:17:51.320 --> 0:17:54.879
<v Speaker 1>a surgeon unless I've seen some people who can be

0:17:54.960 --> 0:17:58.200
<v Speaker 1>surgeons and they use the little robot things to do

0:17:58.320 --> 0:18:01.520
<v Speaker 1>the surgery instead of their actual hands and they're not

0:18:01.560 --> 0:18:04.920
<v Speaker 1>even necessarily disabled. So maybe in the future, but that's

0:18:04.960 --> 0:18:08.040
<v Speaker 1>just not even for me anyway. I'm not good at

0:18:08.320 --> 0:18:10.919
<v Speaker 1>art anyway, so I'm never going to be an artist,

0:18:11.000 --> 0:18:14.520
<v Speaker 1>like disability or not. But it's something I've thought about

0:18:14.520 --> 0:18:16.679
<v Speaker 1>maybe just doing for fun as a hobby, because I

0:18:16.720 --> 0:18:19.840
<v Speaker 1>do enjoy that type of thing. I was actually asked

0:18:19.840 --> 0:18:22.440
<v Speaker 1>the other day by one of my friends, if I

0:18:22.480 --> 0:18:25.920
<v Speaker 1>did a sport other than dancing, what would I want

0:18:25.920 --> 0:18:28.359
<v Speaker 1>to choose? And I was like, oh, I've never been

0:18:28.400 --> 0:18:31.680
<v Speaker 1>asked that. But I thought about tennis, and maybe there's

0:18:31.760 --> 0:18:34.159
<v Speaker 1>an adaptive way to do tennis, but with arm and

0:18:34.240 --> 0:18:38.240
<v Speaker 1>hand brousis tennis would be a difficult one. But I've

0:18:38.320 --> 0:18:41.040
<v Speaker 1>learned that there's so much that I can do and

0:18:41.040 --> 0:18:44.560
<v Speaker 1>that I have done. There's so many opportunities for a

0:18:44.680 --> 0:18:48.960
<v Speaker 1>joy in life that it doesn't matter if you can't

0:18:49.000 --> 0:18:53.560
<v Speaker 1>do some things. And in a lot of ways, there's

0:18:53.880 --> 0:18:57.960
<v Speaker 1>different avenues for doing what you did before, like with dancing.

0:18:58.000 --> 0:19:01.280
<v Speaker 1>For me, I just did it a bit differently after

0:19:01.320 --> 0:19:02.960
<v Speaker 1>becoming disabled. And that's okay.

0:19:03.800 --> 0:19:06.520
<v Speaker 2>I wanted to ask that question for the exact reason

0:19:06.560 --> 0:19:11.320
<v Speaker 2>that you answered it. I'm so glad because it sounds

0:19:11.359 --> 0:19:13.439
<v Speaker 2>funny when I asked it up front, but I wanted

0:19:13.440 --> 0:19:16.920
<v Speaker 2>you to share with people that there was always this

0:19:17.520 --> 0:19:19.720
<v Speaker 2>who you are as a human being came through that question.

0:19:19.920 --> 0:19:21.919
<v Speaker 2>You were going to do what you wanted to do regardless,

0:19:21.920 --> 0:19:23.360
<v Speaker 2>and you were going to figure it out.

0:19:23.920 --> 0:19:25.280
<v Speaker 3>Or the other side of you is I don't care,

0:19:25.320 --> 0:19:27.840
<v Speaker 3>I don't want to do that. It's fine, Yeah, it's fine.

0:19:27.880 --> 0:19:31.680
<v Speaker 2>So it shows the side of importance of this drive

0:19:31.800 --> 0:19:32.359
<v Speaker 2>that you have.

0:19:32.800 --> 0:19:34.800
<v Speaker 3>So just to make sure you know, I answered it,

0:19:34.800 --> 0:19:36.320
<v Speaker 3>But did you did great? You didn't even know?

0:19:36.600 --> 0:19:39.120
<v Speaker 1>Yes, thank you. Yeah, I love that. And I mean,

0:19:39.160 --> 0:19:42.639
<v Speaker 1>obviously it can be sad if you had a hobby

0:19:42.680 --> 0:19:45.240
<v Speaker 1>before disability and then you're disability takes away from you.

0:19:45.720 --> 0:19:49.480
<v Speaker 1>That can be devastating. That does happen, So I think

0:19:49.520 --> 0:19:52.760
<v Speaker 1>allowing yourself to sit with that is okay. But then

0:19:53.040 --> 0:19:55.960
<v Speaker 1>also thinking about all the beautiful things that have happened

0:19:56.480 --> 0:19:59.879
<v Speaker 1>from disability that wouldn't have happened before you would have

0:19:59.840 --> 0:20:02.840
<v Speaker 1>made you just had that hobby. But after disability you

0:20:02.960 --> 0:20:08.320
<v Speaker 1>can gain so many cool like new things like knowledge

0:20:08.359 --> 0:20:09.840
<v Speaker 1>and friends and opportunities.

0:20:10.359 --> 0:20:12.520
<v Speaker 3>And that was saying an opportunity hobby.

0:20:12.600 --> 0:20:14.320
<v Speaker 1>Then yeah, yeah, I did.

0:20:14.840 --> 0:20:17.280
<v Speaker 2>Sorry to interrupt you, but I do remember you met

0:20:17.320 --> 0:20:19.960
<v Speaker 2>somebody and you're really excited about it from your social

0:20:20.000 --> 0:20:20.720
<v Speaker 2>media pages.

0:20:21.320 --> 0:20:24.320
<v Speaker 1>Oh my gosh, who was it? Was it one direction? Yes,

0:20:25.520 --> 0:20:27.600
<v Speaker 1>I figured it was probably them, but I was like,

0:20:27.920 --> 0:20:29.880
<v Speaker 1>it could have been a few other people too, But yes,

0:20:30.600 --> 0:20:32.640
<v Speaker 1>I wouldn't have done that without my disability.

0:20:33.600 --> 0:20:36.880
<v Speaker 2>Yes, So your perspective and the way that you view

0:20:36.920 --> 0:20:39.800
<v Speaker 2>what has happened to you and your disability is just beautiful.

0:20:40.520 --> 0:20:43.840
<v Speaker 3>That perspective is so important, so I love it.

0:20:44.480 --> 0:20:48.680
<v Speaker 2>Yes, Yes, And as you're in college and you're doing

0:20:48.720 --> 0:20:50.160
<v Speaker 2>all these things, so you talk about how your mom

0:20:50.240 --> 0:20:52.359
<v Speaker 2>had really helped you, and a lot of people helped

0:20:52.359 --> 0:20:53.960
<v Speaker 2>you when you were getting ready for school.

0:20:54.400 --> 0:20:54.960
<v Speaker 3>When you were in.

0:20:54.920 --> 0:20:58.800
<v Speaker 2>College, did you have these moments where you're like, holy crap,

0:20:58.880 --> 0:21:00.960
<v Speaker 2>I'm by myself and I have to figure this out.

0:21:01.600 --> 0:21:05.119
<v Speaker 1>Oh my gosh. Yes, And sometimes I remember those they

0:21:05.200 --> 0:21:07.000
<v Speaker 1>just hit me and I'm like, because right now I'm

0:21:07.000 --> 0:21:09.080
<v Speaker 1>living at home and I'm very happy about it for

0:21:09.119 --> 0:21:11.160
<v Speaker 1>the time being where I'm like, oh, I'm so glad

0:21:11.160 --> 0:21:13.239
<v Speaker 1>to be home. There's some memories I have where I'm like, oh,

0:21:13.240 --> 0:21:16.800
<v Speaker 1>I would not go back. Overall, I loved college, had

0:21:16.920 --> 0:21:19.399
<v Speaker 1>such a great time, and I miss a lot of

0:21:19.400 --> 0:21:21.720
<v Speaker 1>things about it. But there were definitely some times where

0:21:21.720 --> 0:21:23.159
<v Speaker 1>I had to figure something out and I'd be like,

0:21:23.200 --> 0:21:26.159
<v Speaker 1>I just want my mom. But then I'm like, that

0:21:26.200 --> 0:21:29.399
<v Speaker 1>would happen disability or not too like the thing that

0:21:29.600 --> 0:21:32.640
<v Speaker 1>I was struggling with maybe was because of my disability,

0:21:32.680 --> 0:21:35.280
<v Speaker 1>but the thought was the same, Oh I just want

0:21:35.280 --> 0:21:38.639
<v Speaker 1>my mom. So many kids would think that and it

0:21:38.680 --> 0:21:42.359
<v Speaker 1>has nothing to do with disability necessarily, And those are

0:21:42.400 --> 0:21:45.600
<v Speaker 1>the times where you know, definitely good for growth. But

0:21:46.720 --> 0:21:48.119
<v Speaker 1>in the moment, I was just like, oh, I just

0:21:48.119 --> 0:21:48.800
<v Speaker 1>want to be at home.

0:21:49.480 --> 0:21:51.720
<v Speaker 2>Yes, And to your point, yes, I had many times

0:21:51.760 --> 0:21:53.560
<v Speaker 2>in college where I was like, oh my gosh, mom,

0:21:53.680 --> 0:21:55.680
<v Speaker 2>it's the mean girl's meme.

0:21:56.119 --> 0:21:58.600
<v Speaker 3>She were the guys yelling his mom picked me up.

0:21:58.640 --> 0:21:59.200
<v Speaker 3>I'm scared.

0:21:59.680 --> 0:22:01.560
<v Speaker 1>Yes, yes, that exact thought.

0:22:02.640 --> 0:22:06.800
<v Speaker 2>Yes, very often for you as someone with a disability,

0:22:07.200 --> 0:22:10.879
<v Speaker 2>do you we were mentioning this topic of to you,

0:22:11.000 --> 0:22:14.119
<v Speaker 2>it's not an invisible disability, and it's really important for

0:22:14.160 --> 0:22:17.760
<v Speaker 2>you to identify that as someone with a disability and

0:22:17.800 --> 0:22:20.480
<v Speaker 2>who isn't doesn't want to refer to it as invisible.

0:22:21.119 --> 0:22:22.560
<v Speaker 3>Do you want people.

0:22:22.720 --> 0:22:25.840
<v Speaker 2>To ask you about it, recognize it, bring it up

0:22:25.960 --> 0:22:28.800
<v Speaker 2>or would you prefer that they don't. And it's just

0:22:28.920 --> 0:22:31.840
<v Speaker 2>you're recognized as a normal human being without that, Like

0:22:31.920 --> 0:22:34.639
<v Speaker 2>what is the way that you would like to be

0:22:34.680 --> 0:22:36.240
<v Speaker 2>approached and interacted with?

0:22:37.240 --> 0:22:40.440
<v Speaker 1>It's so complicated because every situation is so different and

0:22:40.520 --> 0:22:43.919
<v Speaker 1>every human is so different. And see, honestly, I feel

0:22:43.920 --> 0:22:46.880
<v Speaker 1>like my disability is actually not even invisible. I think

0:22:46.960 --> 0:22:52.359
<v Speaker 1>people just don't notice things like my arms and hands

0:22:52.359 --> 0:22:55.280
<v Speaker 1>do look different. And I've actually found a lot of

0:22:55.320 --> 0:22:58.400
<v Speaker 1>comfort and now referring to myself as having a limb difference,

0:22:59.040 --> 0:23:01.320
<v Speaker 1>whereas a lot of people think you're an amputee or

0:23:01.359 --> 0:23:04.080
<v Speaker 1>you were born with some type of limb difference. But

0:23:04.960 --> 0:23:07.040
<v Speaker 1>I've had people refer to me that way, people who

0:23:07.080 --> 0:23:08.639
<v Speaker 1>know me, It is having a limb difference, and I

0:23:08.680 --> 0:23:12.280
<v Speaker 1>actually found it very validating. So I will say that.

0:23:12.359 --> 0:23:15.960
<v Speaker 1>But I think in general, I'm a super open person

0:23:16.160 --> 0:23:19.439
<v Speaker 1>and with my friendships, like once I'm close with someone,

0:23:19.520 --> 0:23:23.840
<v Speaker 1>I actually really like when they ask me questions and

0:23:24.119 --> 0:23:26.200
<v Speaker 1>I don't even care what the question is. If they

0:23:26.240 --> 0:23:29.720
<v Speaker 1>ask about if I can feel something, I don't care.

0:23:30.240 --> 0:23:32.680
<v Speaker 1>With strangers on the internet, I feel like they don't

0:23:32.720 --> 0:23:35.280
<v Speaker 1>really need to know the answers to those questions. But

0:23:35.320 --> 0:23:37.840
<v Speaker 1>I really like when friends do that because it shows

0:23:37.840 --> 0:23:41.639
<v Speaker 1>they're not afraid to ask. What I find interesting is

0:23:41.680 --> 0:23:43.720
<v Speaker 1>with some friendships I've had over the years. I think

0:23:43.760 --> 0:23:46.560
<v Speaker 1>I've had some friends who clearly aren't bothered by the

0:23:46.560 --> 0:23:48.480
<v Speaker 1>fact that I have a disability because they're friends with me.

0:23:49.160 --> 0:23:51.880
<v Speaker 1>But I get the sense that they don't feel super

0:23:51.920 --> 0:23:54.760
<v Speaker 1>comfortable talking about it or they don't know how to

0:23:54.800 --> 0:23:57.880
<v Speaker 1>talk about it, and I feel that honestly makes the friendship,

0:23:57.880 --> 0:24:01.520
<v Speaker 1>in my opinion, more there's just some awkwardness there where.

0:24:01.920 --> 0:24:05.320
<v Speaker 1>If it's just part of the friendship, then it's normal,

0:24:05.560 --> 0:24:08.080
<v Speaker 1>and with strangers it's interesting. Like this is why I

0:24:08.200 --> 0:24:10.679
<v Speaker 1>used to say I had an invisible disability, because when

0:24:10.680 --> 0:24:13.400
<v Speaker 1>I'm walking around at the mall or the grocery store,

0:24:13.400 --> 0:24:16.879
<v Speaker 1>people aren't coming up to me asking me questions. Really like,

0:24:17.320 --> 0:24:20.000
<v Speaker 1>some people might stare at me if they notice I'm

0:24:20.040 --> 0:24:24.080
<v Speaker 1>trying to do something and I look different, but I'm

0:24:24.119 --> 0:24:26.920
<v Speaker 1>not really being treated like a wheelchair user is at

0:24:26.920 --> 0:24:31.719
<v Speaker 1>the grocery store, where people might ask questions unnecessarily. When

0:24:31.760 --> 0:24:35.040
<v Speaker 1>I'm interacting with people, like if I need to ask

0:24:35.080 --> 0:24:39.520
<v Speaker 1>for help with something, I've honestly realized those interactions are

0:24:39.560 --> 0:24:43.320
<v Speaker 1>usually so normal and people are very good about things.

0:24:43.440 --> 0:24:46.400
<v Speaker 1>They don't really ask out of bucket things, and they

0:24:46.480 --> 0:24:49.280
<v Speaker 1>just listen and help me with what I need help with.

0:24:49.480 --> 0:24:53.920
<v Speaker 1>So anyway, Tangent long answer your question because it's just complicated.

0:24:53.960 --> 0:24:56.840
<v Speaker 1>But I feel like with friendships, I want it to

0:24:56.880 --> 0:24:59.560
<v Speaker 1>be acknowledged since it's such a huge part of me,

0:25:00.200 --> 0:25:03.480
<v Speaker 1>and with strangers, they don't need to know things. But

0:25:03.640 --> 0:25:05.280
<v Speaker 1>if it's someone I feel like I'm gonna end up

0:25:05.320 --> 0:25:09.479
<v Speaker 1>seeing again, I don't necessarily really mind a question.

0:25:10.600 --> 0:25:12.720
<v Speaker 2>I love that you gave a complicated answer because it's

0:25:12.720 --> 0:25:16.959
<v Speaker 2>a complicated topic. Yes, and it's again understanding, and the

0:25:16.960 --> 0:25:19.600
<v Speaker 2>only person that can help us understand that is someone

0:25:19.640 --> 0:25:19.960
<v Speaker 2>like you.

0:25:20.880 --> 0:25:21.359
<v Speaker 3>And that's a.

0:25:21.400 --> 0:25:24.240
<v Speaker 2>Catch twenty two because I don't like sitting here and

0:25:24.320 --> 0:25:27.680
<v Speaker 2>making somebody be the advocate in this situation where even

0:25:27.720 --> 0:25:29.439
<v Speaker 2>though you are an advocate and this is what you

0:25:29.480 --> 0:25:32.800
<v Speaker 2>love to do, I don't ever want someone to feel

0:25:32.840 --> 0:25:35.760
<v Speaker 2>like the sole responsibility of teaching other people who aren't

0:25:35.880 --> 0:25:37.240
<v Speaker 2>like them has to do you know.

0:25:37.280 --> 0:25:39.480
<v Speaker 1>As that does happen, it's like you want to involve

0:25:39.560 --> 0:25:42.959
<v Speaker 1>the people in the work, but then there's also a

0:25:42.960 --> 0:25:46.159
<v Speaker 1>lot of emotional and physical labor that goes into that.

0:25:46.720 --> 0:25:48.280
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, but because you're reliving this.

0:25:49.359 --> 0:25:53.440
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, And to your point, you in college, you were

0:25:53.480 --> 0:25:56.040
<v Speaker 2>a disability advocate who was really fighting to do a

0:25:56.080 --> 0:25:59.800
<v Speaker 2>lot of things at your college for those with disabilities.

0:25:59.119 --> 0:26:01.479
<v Speaker 3>Like you, I really love this work.

0:26:01.720 --> 0:26:03.840
<v Speaker 2>But even someone like you who loves his work, who

0:26:03.920 --> 0:26:06.879
<v Speaker 2>talks about it, who wrote a book, still has to

0:26:06.920 --> 0:26:09.159
<v Speaker 2>have moments where you're like, gosh, why can't I just

0:26:09.440 --> 0:26:10.240
<v Speaker 2>be me today?

0:26:10.600 --> 0:26:14.119
<v Speaker 1>Yes? Sometimes, definitely. In college, I would get that feeling

0:26:14.119 --> 0:26:17.240
<v Speaker 1>a lot where I would and this was a compliment,

0:26:17.320 --> 0:26:19.679
<v Speaker 1>but I would have other students come up to me

0:26:19.720 --> 0:26:24.399
<v Speaker 1>and ask me questions about their disability or where to

0:26:24.440 --> 0:26:26.680
<v Speaker 1>seek support for their disability. And it would be when

0:26:26.680 --> 0:26:29.560
<v Speaker 1>I was just walking to class, or not even at

0:26:29.600 --> 0:26:32.840
<v Speaker 1>a disability club meeting where that would maybe be more appropriate.

0:26:33.240 --> 0:26:36.520
<v Speaker 1>And I actually had to learn to set boundaries of

0:26:36.640 --> 0:26:41.720
<v Speaker 1>I can't help everyone. I love that they view me

0:26:41.800 --> 0:26:44.360
<v Speaker 1>as having the knowledge and the ability to do that.

0:26:44.359 --> 0:26:47.119
<v Speaker 1>That's a huge compliment. So it'd always thank them and

0:26:47.200 --> 0:26:50.840
<v Speaker 1>recognize that, but I would give them usually the disability

0:26:50.840 --> 0:26:53.320
<v Speaker 1>office director's email and say go to them or whoever

0:26:53.359 --> 0:26:56.199
<v Speaker 1>the right person was, because I just knew that wasn't

0:26:56.240 --> 0:26:57.400
<v Speaker 1>my responsibility.

0:26:58.280 --> 0:27:01.200
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, and I'm so proud of you for putting boundaries

0:27:01.240 --> 0:27:04.359
<v Speaker 2>because as someone who likes to help, it's often hard

0:27:04.400 --> 0:27:05.600
<v Speaker 2>to place those boundaries in.

0:27:06.000 --> 0:27:08.360
<v Speaker 1>Yes, it is because you can feel bad about it,

0:27:08.880 --> 0:27:10.639
<v Speaker 1>but it doesn't mean that you don't care. It just

0:27:10.680 --> 0:27:13.280
<v Speaker 1>honestly means you're not the right person for them to

0:27:13.359 --> 0:27:16.159
<v Speaker 1>go to, even though they might think you are, and

0:27:16.200 --> 0:27:20.000
<v Speaker 1>that's a compliment. The truth is that the college student

0:27:20.119 --> 0:27:22.760
<v Speaker 1>that you know is not really the right person to

0:27:22.800 --> 0:27:26.480
<v Speaker 1>go to for help with disability accommodations. And that's fine.

0:27:26.800 --> 0:27:29.800
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, which, again, just thank you for being on this

0:27:29.840 --> 0:27:32.120
<v Speaker 2>podcast to share so much of this because it helps

0:27:32.200 --> 0:27:35.639
<v Speaker 2>us understand having conversations like that between a stranger and

0:27:35.680 --> 0:27:39.560
<v Speaker 2>someone with a story gives us the knowledge that we

0:27:39.680 --> 0:27:44.119
<v Speaker 2>all should have to navigate people and humans that we

0:27:44.200 --> 0:27:47.919
<v Speaker 2>interact with every day. But why in college was it

0:27:47.960 --> 0:27:52.040
<v Speaker 2>so important for you to do these adapted processes?

0:27:52.080 --> 0:27:54.320
<v Speaker 3>Why was that something that you focused a lot of

0:27:54.440 --> 0:27:54.879
<v Speaker 3>energy on.

0:27:55.240 --> 0:27:57.760
<v Speaker 1>When I started college, it was because I had to

0:27:58.000 --> 0:28:00.520
<v Speaker 1>for me to be able to go to college andanty

0:28:00.640 --> 0:28:03.720
<v Speaker 1>without my mom or without an aid there with me,

0:28:04.240 --> 0:28:08.200
<v Speaker 1>I had to have accommodations in my Doream in place

0:28:08.680 --> 0:28:11.320
<v Speaker 1>for me to live there. I had alterations to the shower,

0:28:11.520 --> 0:28:15.560
<v Speaker 1>to the sinks, to the drawers, lots of different accommodations

0:28:15.600 --> 0:28:18.520
<v Speaker 1>were made. So it started with that. I did a

0:28:18.520 --> 0:28:21.360
<v Speaker 1>lot of self advocating there because I had to. Then

0:28:21.440 --> 0:28:25.800
<v Speaker 1>I knew that I wanted to be involved in extracurriculars,

0:28:25.800 --> 0:28:27.919
<v Speaker 1>but with high school and college, I liked just not

0:28:28.160 --> 0:28:32.240
<v Speaker 1>just doing school. I liked to have some activities, and

0:28:32.320 --> 0:28:34.399
<v Speaker 1>so I knew a disability club would be like the

0:28:34.440 --> 0:28:37.120
<v Speaker 1>perfect one. And so a lot of it just came

0:28:37.160 --> 0:28:39.520
<v Speaker 1>from that, and then also my social media at the time,

0:28:39.560 --> 0:28:44.200
<v Speaker 1>because I did a lot of videos in college about

0:28:44.200 --> 0:28:46.720
<v Speaker 1>my accommodations and so many people thought it was so

0:28:46.880 --> 0:28:50.440
<v Speaker 1>cool and they had tons of questions, and I realized

0:28:50.480 --> 0:28:52.840
<v Speaker 1>a lot of people weren't talking about this. I didn't

0:28:52.840 --> 0:28:56.200
<v Speaker 1>see any other disabled students online at the time. Now

0:28:56.240 --> 0:28:59.520
<v Speaker 1>I've thankfully seen more representation of that, but at the

0:28:59.560 --> 0:29:02.680
<v Speaker 1>time it was really being discussed, so that became an

0:29:02.720 --> 0:29:06.400
<v Speaker 1>avenue for activism. So it all just tied together and

0:29:06.480 --> 0:29:11.400
<v Speaker 1>started from me being forced to do it, but then

0:29:11.680 --> 0:29:14.280
<v Speaker 1>I enjoyed it and I think it's made me a

0:29:14.320 --> 0:29:18.160
<v Speaker 1>more confident and assertive person too, because I know how

0:29:18.160 --> 0:29:20.479
<v Speaker 1>to talk to people about what I need and I

0:29:20.560 --> 0:29:24.520
<v Speaker 1>can talk about what other people need, like just for

0:29:24.560 --> 0:29:27.360
<v Speaker 1>the community. Do that a lot on behalf of our

0:29:27.400 --> 0:29:28.160
<v Speaker 1>club at school.

0:29:31.480 --> 0:29:33.760
<v Speaker 2>It's so cool what you're doing, Sarah Tuk. I just

0:29:34.040 --> 0:29:40.320
<v Speaker 2>want to recognize that too. I'm curious your perspective because

0:29:40.640 --> 0:29:44.280
<v Speaker 2>having a disability, I've seen on your social media you

0:29:44.320 --> 0:29:45.160
<v Speaker 2>write two things.

0:29:45.280 --> 0:29:47.040
<v Speaker 3>You always read it on every video and.

0:29:46.960 --> 0:29:50.680
<v Speaker 2>It's oh, no advice please, yes, no advice please. And

0:29:50.720 --> 0:29:53.720
<v Speaker 2>then in your captions you always write out the captions

0:29:53.920 --> 0:29:57.719
<v Speaker 2>for others. So being disabled, do you feel like it

0:29:57.760 --> 0:30:01.800
<v Speaker 2>has allowed you to understand others with disabilities better and

0:30:01.840 --> 0:30:04.880
<v Speaker 2>make sure you're also recognizing the things that could be

0:30:04.960 --> 0:30:06.040
<v Speaker 2>hard for them.

0:30:06.480 --> 0:30:09.080
<v Speaker 1>Oh definitely, because I think about this all the time

0:30:09.120 --> 0:30:11.800
<v Speaker 1>that obviously we don't know how I would have been

0:30:11.880 --> 0:30:14.200
<v Speaker 1>as a human if this hadn't happened to me, But

0:30:14.280 --> 0:30:16.120
<v Speaker 1>what we do know is how I am now. But

0:30:16.280 --> 0:30:19.720
<v Speaker 1>I think that I would not have been a person

0:30:19.760 --> 0:30:22.320
<v Speaker 1>who would have known any of that stuff because I

0:30:22.320 --> 0:30:25.240
<v Speaker 1>wouldn't have had a reason to. So even when I

0:30:25.280 --> 0:30:28.040
<v Speaker 1>started making tiktoks five years ago, I didn't think about

0:30:28.040 --> 0:30:31.840
<v Speaker 1>putting captions on them until I saw someone in somebody

0:30:31.880 --> 0:30:34.480
<v Speaker 1>else's comment section mention it. Now I was like, oh, shoot,

0:30:35.080 --> 0:30:37.200
<v Speaker 1>I need to do that. So I was like, if

0:30:37.240 --> 0:30:40.160
<v Speaker 1>I'm making videos talking about disability inclusion, I need to

0:30:40.240 --> 0:30:43.560
<v Speaker 1>practice what I'm preaching as much as I can. Ever

0:30:43.600 --> 0:30:46.640
<v Speaker 1>since then, I've put captions for death and hard of

0:30:46.640 --> 0:30:50.160
<v Speaker 1>hearing people, and they're just more helpful in general, I

0:30:50.200 --> 0:30:52.040
<v Speaker 1>think if you want to watch without the sound on,

0:30:52.680 --> 0:30:55.840
<v Speaker 1>and they just improve comprehension. So I started doing that.

0:30:55.920 --> 0:30:59.000
<v Speaker 1>I put a video description on every video I post,

0:30:59.080 --> 0:31:02.800
<v Speaker 1>and then an image description for every photo, and that

0:31:03.000 --> 0:31:05.920
<v Speaker 1>helps blind and low vision people because they can use

0:31:05.920 --> 0:31:08.920
<v Speaker 1>a screen reader on their phone and it'll scan the

0:31:08.960 --> 0:31:11.920
<v Speaker 1>text and then read it out loud to them, so

0:31:11.960 --> 0:31:14.120
<v Speaker 1>then they have context for what the video or the

0:31:14.120 --> 0:31:17.040
<v Speaker 1>photo is. So I do that. I try to make

0:31:17.240 --> 0:31:20.840
<v Speaker 1>my fonts accessible if I'm ever making a poster or

0:31:20.880 --> 0:31:23.960
<v Speaker 1>something like that, and so I definitely do all of

0:31:23.960 --> 0:31:27.520
<v Speaker 1>that and know a lot about different disabilities, but I

0:31:27.560 --> 0:31:32.440
<v Speaker 1>also recognize I'm only an expert in my experience. So

0:31:32.720 --> 0:31:35.080
<v Speaker 1>for example, the other day, I posted a video looking

0:31:35.200 --> 0:31:38.280
<v Speaker 1>at different products at Sophora and talking about what was

0:31:38.320 --> 0:31:42.520
<v Speaker 1>accessible and inaccessible, and I would say, this pump from

0:31:42.640 --> 0:31:45.520
<v Speaker 1>two Faced doesn't work for me, but I could see

0:31:45.560 --> 0:31:49.080
<v Speaker 1>why other people would like pumps because maybe squeezing is

0:31:49.120 --> 0:31:52.640
<v Speaker 1>hard for them. There was another product that I could do,

0:31:52.880 --> 0:31:55.160
<v Speaker 1>but it was a little bit difficult, but I could

0:31:55.200 --> 0:31:58.320
<v Speaker 1>see that working super well for an amputee who has

0:31:58.360 --> 0:32:00.680
<v Speaker 1>the full strength in their one but they just have

0:32:00.800 --> 0:32:03.640
<v Speaker 1>one hand. So try to think about all of those things.

0:32:04.120 --> 0:32:06.200
<v Speaker 1>But at the end of the day, there's no way

0:32:06.240 --> 0:32:10.080
<v Speaker 1>I can know everything. Yeah, there's something I struggle with.

0:32:10.120 --> 0:32:13.400
<v Speaker 1>On TikTok. There's definitely some people who will comment and

0:32:13.440 --> 0:32:15.880
<v Speaker 1>be like, this works for me, So just because it

0:32:15.880 --> 0:32:18.920
<v Speaker 1>doesn't work for you doesn't mean it's bad. And I'm

0:32:18.920 --> 0:32:20.360
<v Speaker 1>always like, I didn't say it was bad, it just

0:32:20.360 --> 0:32:22.120
<v Speaker 1>said it didn't work for me. I'm not saying it

0:32:22.120 --> 0:32:26.400
<v Speaker 1>shouldn't exist. So we need like more options and variety

0:32:26.440 --> 0:32:27.120
<v Speaker 1>of things.

0:32:27.920 --> 0:32:31.280
<v Speaker 2>This leads me into this next question too, when it

0:32:31.320 --> 0:32:37.160
<v Speaker 2>comes to representation with disabilities. What has that experience been

0:32:37.240 --> 0:32:39.640
<v Speaker 2>like for you, And do you feel like we're going

0:32:39.680 --> 0:32:42.200
<v Speaker 2>in the direction of having more representation.

0:32:42.400 --> 0:32:45.920
<v Speaker 1>I think it obviously is better in recent years. I

0:32:46.040 --> 0:32:50.400
<v Speaker 1>still think what unfortunately happens those when there is disability representation,

0:32:50.560 --> 0:32:54.680
<v Speaker 1>it gets turned into that like inspiration feel like the

0:32:54.840 --> 0:32:59.680
<v Speaker 1>feel good emotions, like where the person with the disabilities

0:32:59.680 --> 0:33:02.760
<v Speaker 1>being objectified to make other people feel good or better

0:33:02.800 --> 0:33:07.080
<v Speaker 1>about their lives. And I almost feel like it's impossible

0:33:07.160 --> 0:33:10.040
<v Speaker 1>for that to not happen. No matter the tone of

0:33:10.600 --> 0:33:13.280
<v Speaker 1>the movie or TV show or what music they use

0:33:13.400 --> 0:33:16.600
<v Speaker 1>or the lines the person has, people are still gonna

0:33:16.600 --> 0:33:18.840
<v Speaker 1>see it that way because that's just like what happens.

0:33:19.120 --> 0:33:22.200
<v Speaker 1>It's almost just women are always going to be seen

0:33:22.240 --> 0:33:25.240
<v Speaker 1>a certain way by men because that's just what happens.

0:33:25.840 --> 0:33:29.200
<v Speaker 1>And it's very frustrating because it's like we don't want

0:33:29.200 --> 0:33:32.560
<v Speaker 1>that to happen. So I definitely think representations better, but

0:33:33.240 --> 0:33:37.600
<v Speaker 1>there's still room for improvement. The one really good movie

0:33:37.600 --> 0:33:40.000
<v Speaker 1>I watched a few months ago was the film version

0:33:40.040 --> 0:33:42.960
<v Speaker 1>of the book Out of My Mind, and it's about

0:33:43.600 --> 0:33:48.239
<v Speaker 1>I think preteen eighteen with cerebral palsy, and it was

0:33:48.320 --> 0:33:52.640
<v Speaker 1>so good, Like they definitely made it known her disabilities

0:33:52.680 --> 0:33:57.200
<v Speaker 1>a part of herself. It was very progressive and definitely

0:33:57.480 --> 0:34:01.000
<v Speaker 1>not that inspiration feel good vibe. It kept it showed

0:34:01.040 --> 0:34:05.040
<v Speaker 1>the challenges of her experience, but also the amazing parts

0:34:05.080 --> 0:34:08.040
<v Speaker 1>of her experience. So I really liked that. So that

0:34:08.080 --> 0:34:09.960
<v Speaker 1>gave me hope for the future of.

0:34:12.440 --> 0:34:13.600
<v Speaker 3>I love that. It's funny.

0:34:13.600 --> 0:34:16.360
<v Speaker 2>One of my shows that I watched, it's called Tracker

0:34:16.560 --> 0:34:19.960
<v Speaker 2>on Paramount and one of the characters they never talk

0:34:20.000 --> 0:34:22.839
<v Speaker 2>about it, but he doesn't have his leg and so

0:34:22.960 --> 0:34:23.879
<v Speaker 2>he's an amputee.

0:34:23.920 --> 0:34:25.520
<v Speaker 3>It's never think he's just a character.

0:34:25.840 --> 0:34:28.520
<v Speaker 1>Yes, that's not to see more of.

0:34:29.040 --> 0:34:31.080
<v Speaker 2>And as you're talking about this, I'm like, I want

0:34:31.080 --> 0:34:33.600
<v Speaker 2>to recognize that because I feel for me as someone

0:34:34.000 --> 0:34:36.799
<v Speaker 2>who just I really pay attention to characters and I

0:34:36.840 --> 0:34:39.120
<v Speaker 2>love seeing the evolution of inclusion.

0:34:39.680 --> 0:34:41.480
<v Speaker 3>And that's so cool.

0:34:41.239 --> 0:34:43.080
<v Speaker 2>To me because he's just a character, that's who he is,

0:34:43.120 --> 0:34:45.680
<v Speaker 2>and he's helping out this main character in this storyline.

0:34:45.719 --> 0:34:48.000
<v Speaker 1>I love that. Yes, I'm so glad you mentioned that

0:34:48.200 --> 0:34:50.839
<v Speaker 1>because the movie I mentioned is about disability. But it's

0:34:50.880 --> 0:34:53.600
<v Speaker 1>even cooler when it's there's a disabled character and.

0:34:54.400 --> 0:34:55.920
<v Speaker 3>That's just what they're just a character.

0:34:55.960 --> 0:34:58.000
<v Speaker 2>They're just a human being, which at the end of

0:34:58.040 --> 0:35:01.640
<v Speaker 2>the day, what people what disabilities are as a human being.

0:35:01.800 --> 0:35:05.160
<v Speaker 1>Yes, yes, and it's not all we talk about, like

0:35:05.320 --> 0:35:08.320
<v Speaker 1>even though like I love talking about it and do advocacy,

0:35:08.320 --> 0:35:11.200
<v Speaker 1>there's so much more to me than that too, And

0:35:11.320 --> 0:35:14.279
<v Speaker 1>not in a way of my disability being inferior to

0:35:14.320 --> 0:35:17.280
<v Speaker 1>the other aspects of me, but like just the same

0:35:17.320 --> 0:35:19.839
<v Speaker 1>as the other aspects of my personality, like me being

0:35:19.880 --> 0:35:22.799
<v Speaker 1>talkative and me having a disability kind of the same thing.

0:35:23.480 --> 0:35:25.960
<v Speaker 2>Yes, And that actually that perfectly leads me to the

0:35:26.040 --> 0:35:27.600
<v Speaker 2>last question that I was going to ask you, because

0:35:27.600 --> 0:35:29.799
<v Speaker 2>I saw you say something that you want to be

0:35:29.840 --> 0:35:33.959
<v Speaker 2>seen as a physically disabled young woman that you're also aligned.

0:35:33.600 --> 0:35:35.000
<v Speaker 3>With all of your other identities.

0:35:35.239 --> 0:35:38.640
<v Speaker 2>Yes, share with people why that matters so much, because

0:35:38.640 --> 0:35:39.920
<v Speaker 2>it's what you were just talking about.

0:35:39.920 --> 0:35:41.720
<v Speaker 3>But I want you to expand further.

0:35:42.239 --> 0:35:44.920
<v Speaker 1>Yes, I love that stood out to you because yeah,

0:35:45.000 --> 0:35:47.040
<v Speaker 1>I do say I want to be seen as the

0:35:47.040 --> 0:35:49.880
<v Speaker 1>physically disabled young woman that I am, along with all

0:35:49.960 --> 0:35:54.200
<v Speaker 1>my other qualities and things about my personality. And I

0:35:54.280 --> 0:35:58.000
<v Speaker 1>say that because if we try to ignore that my

0:35:58.080 --> 0:36:01.480
<v Speaker 1>disability exists. Like I was touching on earlier with how

0:36:01.520 --> 0:36:04.640
<v Speaker 1>I felt with some friendships over the years, it feels

0:36:04.640 --> 0:36:08.440
<v Speaker 1>like people aren't seeing the full picture of me because

0:36:08.520 --> 0:36:10.520
<v Speaker 1>so much of who I am has to do with

0:36:10.640 --> 0:36:13.840
<v Speaker 1>my disability, because it impacts my life every day. But

0:36:13.920 --> 0:36:15.719
<v Speaker 1>at the same time, I don't want it to be

0:36:15.760 --> 0:36:19.200
<v Speaker 1>seen as some pity thing or some sad tragedy or

0:36:19.239 --> 0:36:22.879
<v Speaker 1>anything like that. It's just part of me, and it's

0:36:23.000 --> 0:36:25.680
<v Speaker 1>just as much a part of me as me being outgoing,

0:36:25.800 --> 0:36:29.759
<v Speaker 1>me being confident, me loving social media, like they're all

0:36:29.800 --> 0:36:33.840
<v Speaker 1>just parts of me and integral parts of me and

0:36:33.880 --> 0:36:37.160
<v Speaker 1>big parts of my identity and everything I do is

0:36:37.680 --> 0:36:41.080
<v Speaker 1>shaped by my disability in a way, because I can't

0:36:41.320 --> 0:36:45.400
<v Speaker 1>not think about how that impacts my life or impacts

0:36:45.680 --> 0:36:48.040
<v Speaker 1>where I go and what I do. I like to

0:36:48.040 --> 0:36:50.960
<v Speaker 1>say that, and I think it also normalizes disability being

0:36:51.360 --> 0:36:54.880
<v Speaker 1>just part of someone, a big part of their identity

0:36:54.920 --> 0:36:55.640
<v Speaker 1>and who they are.

0:36:56.360 --> 0:36:58.040
<v Speaker 2>Then I know that was supposed to be my last

0:36:58.080 --> 0:37:00.279
<v Speaker 2>question that I had written here. It led me to

0:37:00.320 --> 0:37:03.640
<v Speaker 2>ask something else because I would imagine that you're in

0:37:03.680 --> 0:37:06.520
<v Speaker 2>the perfect place of your life where you're dating and

0:37:06.600 --> 0:37:08.320
<v Speaker 2>exploring opportunities in dating.

0:37:09.280 --> 0:37:11.319
<v Speaker 3>What's that experience been like for you?

0:37:11.600 --> 0:37:15.640
<v Speaker 2>Because I imagine it's a little bit different, and you're also

0:37:15.719 --> 0:37:17.600
<v Speaker 2>looking for a very specific partner.

0:37:18.200 --> 0:37:21.359
<v Speaker 1>Yes, I love that you asked this. I feel like

0:37:21.680 --> 0:37:24.400
<v Speaker 1>in high school, especially, I was not interested in dating.

0:37:24.440 --> 0:37:26.080
<v Speaker 1>I was just like, I'm here to go to school.

0:37:26.840 --> 0:37:28.960
<v Speaker 1>I lived far from my school, so I had to

0:37:28.960 --> 0:37:31.399
<v Speaker 1>get up really early to go and didn't have much

0:37:31.400 --> 0:37:33.400
<v Speaker 1>time to do homework and just like rest. So in

0:37:33.480 --> 0:37:36.840
<v Speaker 1>high school, I didn't even really think about it. In college,

0:37:37.440 --> 0:37:39.719
<v Speaker 1>I guess I got this idea, oh, I'll find my

0:37:39.760 --> 0:37:42.160
<v Speaker 1>future husband in college. And then I went to a

0:37:42.239 --> 0:37:45.560
<v Speaker 1>super small school with eighteen hundred students total, and there

0:37:45.560 --> 0:37:49.040
<v Speaker 1>were a few, like slightly more females than males there,

0:37:49.280 --> 0:37:51.239
<v Speaker 1>and so it just didn't happen. And I was like,

0:37:51.280 --> 0:37:54.200
<v Speaker 1>I'm not forcing anything to happen. And I also realized

0:37:54.280 --> 0:37:56.440
<v Speaker 1>any time I tried, I just didn't even feel like

0:37:56.480 --> 0:37:58.279
<v Speaker 1>putting in the effort. So I just realized it wasn't

0:37:58.320 --> 0:38:02.400
<v Speaker 1>a priority. College. I've thought about a bit more a

0:38:02.440 --> 0:38:06.400
<v Speaker 1>little bit, but once again, I'm still like, it's just

0:38:06.440 --> 0:38:09.920
<v Speaker 1>not really something I'm super desiring to do. But I

0:38:09.960 --> 0:38:14.080
<v Speaker 1>will say it's interesting because the times I've met guys,

0:38:14.239 --> 0:38:16.280
<v Speaker 1>we've gone out or we're at a bar, I'm talking

0:38:16.280 --> 0:38:19.080
<v Speaker 1>to someone, I feel like they have no clue. I'm

0:38:19.080 --> 0:38:21.680
<v Speaker 1>always just thinking. I had like, these guys are so clueless.

0:38:22.080 --> 0:38:24.839
<v Speaker 1>And I actually was talking to a guy I don't

0:38:24.840 --> 0:38:28.439
<v Speaker 1>know a few months ago outside a bar, like two

0:38:28.480 --> 0:38:31.520
<v Speaker 1>in the morning, and we were just talking, messing around,

0:38:31.560 --> 0:38:33.399
<v Speaker 1>and he grabbed both of my hands while we were talking.

0:38:33.440 --> 0:38:36.160
<v Speaker 1>He was like, your hands are so soft. And it's

0:38:36.160 --> 0:38:39.160
<v Speaker 1>so funny because people say my hands are softer because

0:38:39.160 --> 0:38:42.040
<v Speaker 1>there's not as much muscle tone, so they literally are softer.

0:38:42.800 --> 0:38:45.280
<v Speaker 1>And I was like, this dude has no freaking clue.

0:38:45.719 --> 0:38:47.440
<v Speaker 1>And I was just like, oh, I use hand cream.

0:38:49.000 --> 0:38:50.960
<v Speaker 3>I love this experience for you.

0:38:51.400 --> 0:38:53.680
<v Speaker 1>It's so funny. So honestly, okay, all that to say,

0:38:53.719 --> 0:38:57.040
<v Speaker 1>I just feel like they don't really know guys. They're

0:38:57.080 --> 0:39:00.759
<v Speaker 1>not thinking that deeply honestly about much, and especially not

0:39:00.800 --> 0:39:04.440
<v Speaker 1>a disability. But it's actually cast some interesting thoughts for me,

0:39:04.560 --> 0:39:07.359
<v Speaker 1>because back to the how I want to be seen thing,

0:39:08.000 --> 0:39:10.359
<v Speaker 1>I don't want it to be something that guys are

0:39:10.400 --> 0:39:14.800
<v Speaker 1>like or weird about or tiptoe around. And I feel

0:39:14.840 --> 0:39:18.359
<v Speaker 1>like guys are weird about it with me because they

0:39:19.040 --> 0:39:21.000
<v Speaker 1>can look at me and forget about it and push

0:39:21.080 --> 0:39:22.680
<v Speaker 1>it to the back of their minds and just see

0:39:22.680 --> 0:39:26.359
<v Speaker 1>the five foot blonde girl and then I fit into

0:39:26.400 --> 0:39:30.840
<v Speaker 1>that stereotype and that feels weird too, Like I want

0:39:30.880 --> 0:39:33.719
<v Speaker 1>them to see it just like how I do with

0:39:33.800 --> 0:39:38.200
<v Speaker 1>my friends, and I don't know. Maybe that'll happen eventually,

0:39:38.280 --> 0:39:41.200
<v Speaker 1>but I'm not going to force anything to happen, so

0:39:41.760 --> 0:39:44.360
<v Speaker 1>we'll see. But it's definitely more complicated as a disabled person,

0:39:44.840 --> 0:39:47.799
<v Speaker 1>and you have to be even more safe with it

0:39:47.840 --> 0:39:52.400
<v Speaker 1>too than most women too. I'm constantly thinking about how

0:39:52.920 --> 0:39:56.520
<v Speaker 1>I'm going to keep myself safe and what information I

0:39:56.520 --> 0:40:00.480
<v Speaker 1>would reveal to someone and keep to myself, because you

0:40:00.520 --> 0:40:03.560
<v Speaker 1>don't want to seem extra vulnerable because you're already vulnerable

0:40:03.600 --> 0:40:04.120
<v Speaker 1>as the woman.

0:40:04.760 --> 0:40:06.960
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, for sure, there's so many vulnerabilities and you're just

0:40:07.040 --> 0:40:10.120
<v Speaker 2>piling onto that. Yeah, And I love that you're not

0:40:10.160 --> 0:40:13.120
<v Speaker 2>forcing it, because I do. I think there's somebody for everybody,

0:40:13.160 --> 0:40:16.359
<v Speaker 2>and I think you'll meet someone who is going to

0:40:16.440 --> 0:40:19.520
<v Speaker 2>recognize you for you and have those conversations for you

0:40:19.560 --> 0:40:21.719
<v Speaker 2>and not put it in the back of their mind,

0:40:21.760 --> 0:40:23.120
<v Speaker 2>because that's also what you deserve.

0:40:23.600 --> 0:40:26.000
<v Speaker 1>Yes, thank you, Yes, Yeah, I feel like but if

0:40:26.000 --> 0:40:28.359
<v Speaker 1>I want that to happen, I'll be able to make

0:40:28.400 --> 0:40:30.840
<v Speaker 1>that happen too when the time is right. And I'm like,

0:40:30.880 --> 0:40:32.440
<v Speaker 1>twenty three is also so young.

0:40:32.600 --> 0:40:34.120
<v Speaker 3>Oh yeah, you got so much time.

0:40:34.400 --> 0:40:36.280
<v Speaker 1>I think people freak out and they're like, oh my gosh,

0:40:36.280 --> 0:40:38.080
<v Speaker 1>I need to find someone in college and then right

0:40:38.120 --> 0:40:41.200
<v Speaker 1>after college, and twenty three is so young. I'm not

0:40:41.440 --> 0:40:42.680
<v Speaker 1>rushed at all.

0:40:44.040 --> 0:40:45.680
<v Speaker 2>Sarah tied if I could look back at my life

0:40:45.800 --> 0:40:47.520
<v Speaker 2>and the person that I was at twenty three is

0:40:47.640 --> 0:40:50.080
<v Speaker 2>vastly different than the person I am now thirty one.

0:40:49.960 --> 0:40:53.279
<v Speaker 1>I'm sure so much growth happens, like it does so much.

0:40:53.360 --> 0:40:55.440
<v Speaker 1>The twenties are pivotal time for growth.

0:40:55.840 --> 0:40:59.160
<v Speaker 2>They are, and they're so much fun to do by yourself, honestly,

0:40:59.239 --> 0:41:01.200
<v Speaker 2>so keep doing it. But I wanted to ask because

0:41:01.239 --> 0:41:03.520
<v Speaker 2>I do know that's such an important part of this

0:41:03.680 --> 0:41:04.200
<v Speaker 2>life for you.

0:41:04.440 --> 0:41:05.520
<v Speaker 3>I do like to end on.

0:41:05.920 --> 0:41:08.040
<v Speaker 2>A piece of advice or a piece of something that

0:41:08.120 --> 0:41:10.279
<v Speaker 2>maybe we didn't get to that maybe you want to

0:41:10.320 --> 0:41:10.880
<v Speaker 2>share in.

0:41:10.960 --> 0:41:12.760
<v Speaker 3>This is open ended. You can go in any direction

0:41:12.800 --> 0:41:13.360
<v Speaker 3>that you want with this.

0:41:14.760 --> 0:41:18.759
<v Speaker 1>I think lately I've been talking a lot about confidence

0:41:18.800 --> 0:41:22.040
<v Speaker 1>and self advocacy on social media, and so I just

0:41:22.080 --> 0:41:25.000
<v Speaker 1>want to leave everyone with, especially if you're a disabled person,

0:41:25.160 --> 0:41:27.720
<v Speaker 1>don't be afraid to stand up for what you need.

0:41:28.040 --> 0:41:30.400
<v Speaker 1>Don't be afraid to ask a stranger for help. I

0:41:30.440 --> 0:41:32.480
<v Speaker 1>know it's so easy for me to say that, but

0:41:32.800 --> 0:41:35.520
<v Speaker 1>I still feel scared when I ask a random person

0:41:35.560 --> 0:41:38.160
<v Speaker 1>for help because I don't know how they're going to respond.

0:41:38.600 --> 0:41:41.919
<v Speaker 1>But I think trying your best to just do those

0:41:41.960 --> 0:41:45.919
<v Speaker 1>things and recognize it's okay to be scared while you're

0:41:45.920 --> 0:41:49.160
<v Speaker 1>doing it is good because there's so much power in

0:41:49.239 --> 0:41:52.680
<v Speaker 1>advocating for yourself and it will make you a more

0:41:52.719 --> 0:41:56.160
<v Speaker 1>confident person. You'll be a better communicator, you'll be more assertive,

0:41:56.920 --> 0:41:59.480
<v Speaker 1>and especially if you're a woman, like it feels so

0:41:59.600 --> 0:42:02.320
<v Speaker 1>good be able to be like that as a woman.

0:42:02.640 --> 0:42:05.319
<v Speaker 1>So I really love to encourage that with people, and

0:42:06.120 --> 0:42:10.000
<v Speaker 1>remember that you don't need to reveal any medical details

0:42:10.040 --> 0:42:12.680
<v Speaker 1>to anyone when you're asking for help, and you can

0:42:12.760 --> 0:42:16.680
<v Speaker 1>keep it succinct and kind and assertive. And I just

0:42:16.800 --> 0:42:19.280
<v Speaker 1>like to encourage people to do that as much as possible.

0:42:19.320 --> 0:42:21.680
<v Speaker 1>But I know it's difficult, so it sounds easy for

0:42:21.760 --> 0:42:23.840
<v Speaker 1>me to say, but there's a lot of power and

0:42:23.880 --> 0:42:25.440
<v Speaker 1>self advocacy. I'll leave with that.

0:42:26.200 --> 0:42:29.640
<v Speaker 2>There absolutely is, and there's also power in people like

0:42:29.719 --> 0:42:33.080
<v Speaker 2>me to make sure that we respond accordingly and also

0:42:33.200 --> 0:42:34.880
<v Speaker 2>kind and also open minded.

0:42:35.040 --> 0:42:36.800
<v Speaker 3>It's an important message for everybody.

0:42:37.560 --> 0:42:39.400
<v Speaker 2>Thank you so much for being here, for coming on,

0:42:39.480 --> 0:42:41.120
<v Speaker 2>for talking about these things that I do know that

0:42:41.160 --> 0:42:41.600
<v Speaker 2>it's hard.

0:42:42.120 --> 0:42:44.040
<v Speaker 1>Yes, I really love this. This is one of my

0:42:44.120 --> 0:42:47.200
<v Speaker 1>favorite conversations I feel like I've had on a podcast.

0:42:47.239 --> 0:42:48.719
<v Speaker 1>You ask such great questions.

0:42:49.000 --> 0:42:50.920
<v Speaker 2>I'm so glad it's important for me to be a

0:42:50.920 --> 0:42:53.320
<v Speaker 2>conversation and most of the time we leave as friends.

0:42:53.360 --> 0:42:57.000
<v Speaker 2>So if you ever end up being here Nashville in person,

0:42:57.360 --> 0:42:59.280
<v Speaker 2>we'll do another interview in person.

0:42:59.400 --> 0:43:03.360
<v Speaker 1>I will. I love Nashville, so we should totally do that.

0:43:03.360 --> 0:43:04.600
<v Speaker 3>That would be so much fun.

0:43:04.680 --> 0:43:07.239
<v Speaker 2>But Sarah Todd, thank you so much for coming on,

0:43:07.280 --> 0:43:09.360
<v Speaker 2>and thank you again for what you're doing for the

0:43:09.400 --> 0:43:11.360
<v Speaker 2>disabled community and for yourself.

0:43:11.719 --> 0:43:13.840
<v Speaker 1>Thank you so much. Thanks for having me, Morgan.

0:43:14.440 --> 0:43:16.680
<v Speaker 2>Sarah Todd Hammer was so much fun talking too, and

0:43:16.760 --> 0:43:19.480
<v Speaker 2>not only a great leader but also an awesome human.

0:43:19.920 --> 0:43:22.440
<v Speaker 2>In the coming weeks, I'll be doing episodes on friendship,

0:43:22.600 --> 0:43:25.279
<v Speaker 2>health and wellness, veterans and one of my favorite dog

0:43:25.320 --> 0:43:29.000
<v Speaker 2>rescuers on social media. Subscribe so you don't miss an episode.

0:43:29.080 --> 0:43:30.640
<v Speaker 2>I can't wait for you guys to hear these, and

0:43:30.680 --> 0:43:32.600
<v Speaker 2>as always, I'm so happy you're here.

0:43:32.719 --> 0:43:33.680
<v Speaker 3>I love you. Bye.