WEBVTT - It's not my favorite

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<v Speaker 1>Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of iHeartRadio. Good Morning,

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<v Speaker 1>This is Laura. Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast. Today's

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<v Speaker 1>tip is to find a phrase to express your preferences tactfully,

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<v Speaker 1>and teach your kids to do the same. Some folks

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<v Speaker 1>grew up being told that if you don't have anything

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<v Speaker 1>nice to say, don't say anything at all, and there

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<v Speaker 1>is wisdom in this. Nobody wants to be around people

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<v Speaker 1>who are always criticizing and complaining. If you aren't being

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<v Speaker 1>asked for your feedback, and especially if there's nothing to

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<v Speaker 1>be done to change a situation, it is often better

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<v Speaker 1>to keep your opinions to yourself. But there are also

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<v Speaker 1>times when you do have to say something, such as

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<v Speaker 1>when you are asked directly what you think. In general,

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<v Speaker 1>it is not a good idea to lie or to

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<v Speaker 1>tell your kids that it is okay to lie. So

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<v Speaker 1>that means that there is wisdom in having a phrase

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<v Speaker 1>that allows you to express your opinion in a tactful way.

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<v Speaker 1>I know of a family whose kids use the phrase

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<v Speaker 1>it's not my favorite to acknowledge their dislikes. They are

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<v Speaker 1>adventurous eaters, but like everyone, they have some foods that

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<v Speaker 1>they don't love. If there serve foods they don't like,

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<v Speaker 1>they will eat a reasonable amount without drama, But if

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<v Speaker 1>they are asked about the food, they will say politely,

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<v Speaker 1>it's not my favorite. If you ask their opinion of

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<v Speaker 1>a book or movie or restaurant they don't love, you

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<v Speaker 1>will get the same response, it's not my favorite. Experiences

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<v Speaker 1>they don't like get the same description, how as performing

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<v Speaker 1>in the class play being on stage isn't my favorite.

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<v Speaker 1>They are not uncomfortable expressing their preferences, but the tone

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<v Speaker 1>isn't negative or critical, and they don't insult something that

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<v Speaker 1>someone else likes. They don't say ooh, that's gross about

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<v Speaker 1>a food they don't like, and thus make people who

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<v Speaker 1>do like that food feel bad. It's not my favorite

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<v Speaker 1>is about their preferences, not a demand for the way

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<v Speaker 1>the world has to be. I think this is a

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<v Speaker 1>great phrase, and there are others that are similar. Sometimes

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<v Speaker 1>people use it's not for me to get it the

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<v Speaker 1>same thing. If you are asked about the decor of

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<v Speaker 1>a new restaurant, you could comment on how cohesive it is,

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<v Speaker 1>but acknowledge that the decor is not for you. When

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<v Speaker 1>asked about a book or movie or TV show and

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<v Speaker 1>a genre that would never appeal to you. It's not

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<v Speaker 1>for me conveys all you need to same for an

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<v Speaker 1>Instagram account you find annoying, a cookbook author you find pretentious,

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<v Speaker 1>or Halloween decorations that strike you as tacky. If you

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<v Speaker 1>are asked your opinion, it's not for me works just

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<v Speaker 1>as well. Sometimes when I am asked point blank about

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<v Speaker 1>things I don't want to get too into the details on,

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<v Speaker 1>I'll say something like I haven't thought much about it.

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<v Speaker 1>I can avoid expressing an opinion, which is sometimes the

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<v Speaker 1>right call. If like me, you sometimes wish your kids

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<v Speaker 1>would complain a little less, you could try modeling one

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<v Speaker 1>of these phrases in front of them until they start

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<v Speaker 1>to pick it up. It's not my favorite or it's

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<v Speaker 1>not for me can be great in all kinds of circumstances.

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<v Speaker 1>In many cases, your kids don't want to actively insult anyone.

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<v Speaker 1>They just haven't thought about how people hear other phrases.

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<v Speaker 1>They may find this a welcome tool, or if not,

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<v Speaker 1>maybe they can at least be taught that tact goes

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<v Speaker 1>a long way knowledge our own preferences while still respecting others.

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<v Speaker 1>In the meantime, This is Laura, Thanks for listening and

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<v Speaker 1>here's to making the most of our time. Thanks for

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<v Speaker 1>listening to Before Breakfast. If you've got questions, ideas, or feedback,

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<v Speaker 1>you can reach me at Laura at Laura vandercam dot com.

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<v Speaker 1>Before Breakfast is a production of iHeartMedia. For more podcasts

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<v Speaker 1>from iHeartMedia, please visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or

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