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Speaker 1: All right, break it down.

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Speaker 2: If you ever have feelings that you just won't Amy

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Speaker 2: and Cat gotcha, Cob and locking m brother, ladies and felts.

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Speaker 2: We just follow Anna spirit where it's all the front

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Speaker 2: over real stuff, tell the chill stuff and him.

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Speaker 3: But Swayne.

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Speaker 2: Sometimes the best thing you can do it just.

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Speaker 3: Stop you feel things.

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Speaker 4: This is feeling things with Amy and Kat.

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Speaker 1: Happy Tuesday. Welcome to feeling things. I'm Amy and I'm

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Speaker 1: Kat and our feeling of the day.

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Speaker 4: I'm ringing the feeling.

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Speaker 1: Okay, it is I feel relief because my boyfriend met

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Speaker 1: my ex husband.

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Speaker 4: Check.

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Speaker 5: Well, I don't know the story.

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Speaker 1: So my daughter had a birthday and we all went

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Speaker 1: out to eat. I didn't tell you this part. Alex,

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Speaker 1: we've said his.

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Speaker 2: Name, okay, okay.

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Speaker 5: Alex was with you.

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Speaker 4: Well, no, sheer invited him.

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Speaker 1: My daughter said he could, but he had not met

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Speaker 1: her dad, my ex husband, And he said, it's her birthday.

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Speaker 4: I don't want that to.

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Speaker 1: Be like a overshadow overshadow her birthday because not that

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Speaker 1: it totally would, but we just didn't Eve want to

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Speaker 1: run the risk of that. He said, how about after

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Speaker 1: her dinner, all stop by the house and he did

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Speaker 1: that my in laws, my ex in laws, were in

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Speaker 1: town though I still call them my in laws, but

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Speaker 1: they're my ex in laws, and they were coming by

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Speaker 1: my house because they gave me a ride to the dinner.

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Speaker 1: And then at dinner I talked to Ben about how, hey,

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Speaker 1: Alex is going to be coming by the house.

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Speaker 4: It was like, why don't you stop by?

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Speaker 1: Your parents gonna be coming, and then I don't know

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Speaker 1: if you had something to pick up or drop off.

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Speaker 4: I don't know. Because this happened.

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Speaker 1: My relief is I've been able to exhale for the

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Speaker 1: last like, I don't know, a week and a half,

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Speaker 1: two weeks now, So this happened a minute ago, which

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Speaker 1: is so funny that we haven't talked about it. But

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Speaker 1: I think sometimes we hold off stuff because well, we

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Speaker 1: know we're going to record it for the podcast, or

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Speaker 1: we talk about other things. So my exhale is like

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Speaker 1: I just feel relief, like it it felt so good

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Speaker 1: to have it go well, and I guess in my

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Speaker 1: mind I was like, I don't know how this is

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Speaker 1: ever going to go or what it's going to be like,

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Speaker 1: and it's going to be so awkward, And it wasn't

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Speaker 1: awkward at all.

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Speaker 2: And so what was.

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Speaker 5: It like, like did he come to the door and who?

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Speaker 1: Well, first of all, Ben always comes to the back door,

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Speaker 1: but this day he came to the front door, and

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Speaker 1: I think he just thought.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, and I'm like, what are you doing? Like you

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Speaker 4: always come through the back.

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Speaker 1: So he came to the front door, knocked, and I'm like,

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Speaker 1: I knew you were coming over and your parents are here,

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Speaker 1: just walk in. So he knocked and then he came in,

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Speaker 1: and then Alex is already talking to his parents.

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Speaker 4: So they met.

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Speaker 1: So Alex met my ex inlaws okay, and my ex

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Speaker 1: husbin and he walks in and they both just like

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Speaker 1: lean towards each other with like a firm grip.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, Cryocat was here.

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Speaker 1: It was like this very firm like, like the firmest like.

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Speaker 4: And then it was first name, last name, both of them.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, and he was like, hey, I'm boom Beam and

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Speaker 1: He's like not.

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Speaker 2: Not, you know, I'm sorry. I don't think I've ever

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Speaker 2: introduced myself as Catherine Defotta to anybody or van Be okay.

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Speaker 4: So we can act it out with our names.

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Speaker 1: I could be like if I walked in your your

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Speaker 1: say I always came in your back door, but today

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Speaker 1: I come to your front door. And then I walk

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Speaker 1: in and with a very firm him shake, I'm like.

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Speaker 2: Hey, Amy Brown, Catherine van Buren, No.

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Speaker 4: You need Cat vaan Buren, Cat van Buren shake?

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Speaker 2: Wait wait what if? What if?

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Speaker 1: Then introduced himself and I was like, just so you

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Speaker 1: can remember his name?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I don't.

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Speaker 4: I don't think I'll have trouble forgetting it.

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Speaker 2: But that is that's such a dude thing of like,

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Speaker 2: oh my first name and my last name.

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Speaker 1: Yes, for both of them. Like I was like, what

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Speaker 1: I was sitting? I was like, what is going on

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Speaker 1: just now? It was very interesting to see men in

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Speaker 1: their natural habitat.

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Speaker 2: What did they say after they said it.

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Speaker 4: Was they just started touching casual Alex.

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Speaker 1: They had Alex do a mutual friend of Ben's, and

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Speaker 1: Ben had just put on this awesome charity event for

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Speaker 1: foster kids like that week. That's why his parents were

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Speaker 1: in town, and then it was to Shear's birthday, so

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Speaker 1: they stayed in town for that as well. But Alex

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Speaker 1: asked him how the event went, and Ben was sort

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Speaker 1: of like, how how did you know about that? He's like, oh,

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Speaker 1: my friend was going And then they talked about the

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Speaker 1: night and Alex said like, oh, yeah, well, congratulations, that's

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Speaker 1: really awesome, and it was a very normal I just

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Speaker 1: you know, that exhale, that relief, and so the gift

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Speaker 1: of relief is something stressful or.

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Speaker 4: Painful has ended or east.

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Speaker 1: Yes, and not that it was painful, but I did

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Speaker 1: have a little bit of stress of like, when is

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Speaker 1: this going to happen?

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Speaker 4: How is it going to happen?

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Speaker 1: Because I thought maybe it would happen at a track

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Speaker 1: meet for one of the kids, but then it never

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Speaker 1: really worked out to where Alex could get there because

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Speaker 1: he's got three kids and then or at a time

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Speaker 1: when Ben was gonna be there.

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Speaker 4: So it just never happened.

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Speaker 1: Until it did, and then I was like, yay, So

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Speaker 1: I'm glad that I get to lean into my exhale,

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Speaker 1: because without relief, if you don't let yourself sit in

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Speaker 1: the relief and feel it and like, then wins will

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Speaker 1: feel exhausting.

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Speaker 4: Even yeah, that's what I heard, and.

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Speaker 2: It sounds like too. The biggest one of the biggest

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Speaker 2: parts of this is the unknown. It's you didn't know

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Speaker 2: how it was going to happen, and that was the

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Speaker 2: most probably consuming.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, and I was it like it was organic.

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Speaker 1: Yet I was also able to give a heads up,

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Speaker 1: so nobody was surprised.

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Speaker 4: Like I didn't know it would happen that night.

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Speaker 1: But at dinner, Bin and I sat by each other

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Speaker 1: and we had a really good conversation, and so I

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Speaker 1: just decided to shoot my shot and say, hey, you know,

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Speaker 1: swing by the house.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: I think Vin's Varens were probably more nervous than Vin was,

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Speaker 1: because they were like, oh, he's coming, Oh.

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Speaker 4: He were going to meet him?

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Speaker 1: Oh okay, okay, okay, And then they did and everyone

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Speaker 1: was great, Yeah, yeah.

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Speaker 5: So okay. Well, also, good job Alex for meeting the

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Speaker 5: whole fam.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, wins or successful moments should feel energizing, not exhausting.

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Speaker 4: You look energized, lean into the relief.

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Speaker 2: Love it.

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Speaker 1: And now we can go anywhere and do anything and

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Speaker 1: run into anybody and I don't have to freak out.

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Speaker 4: And by anybody, I mean like.

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Speaker 5: I think you would have freaked out if you ran organically.

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Speaker 1: I think if we were to organically, like if we

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Speaker 1: were to run into him.

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Speaker 4: Just at a restaurant or at the mall, I guess

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Speaker 4: it would be okay, I.

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Speaker 5: Thank you, Okay.

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Speaker 2: See that's unknown it's like we build it up in

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Speaker 2: our heads, but I think you'd be able to handle.

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Speaker 4: It, and I handled it. I handled it well, okay.

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Speaker 1: Which speaking of my relationship, you and I were talking

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Speaker 1: on the phone before we recorded, and I had a

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Speaker 1: kind of an emotional day with my relationship, my with

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Speaker 1: my widower boyfriend, which I do want to acknowledge. Really quickly,

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Speaker 1: we got a really nice email from Lindsay, who is

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Speaker 1: a listener that also married a widower, and she sent

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Speaker 1: an email. I'm not going to read the whole thing,

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Speaker 1: but I did copy and paste it onto our little

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Speaker 1: doc here because I wanted to give her a shout

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Speaker 1: out because she gave me encouragement for talking.

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Speaker 4: About my relationship the way that I.

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Speaker 1: Have, because she knows that she felt the same even

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Speaker 1: though now they're officially married.

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Speaker 4: I'm just dating one.

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Speaker 1: But he also had kids, and she shared a little

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Speaker 1: bit of her experience becoming a stepmom, and also that

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Speaker 1: she knows there's so many other people that are going

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Speaker 1: through this and it's a different type of struggle that

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Speaker 1: not a lot of people may understand.

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Speaker 4: So she was grateful that I was talking about it.

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Speaker 1: So Lindsay, also, thank you for sending the email because

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Speaker 1: that gave me encouragement to also know that I'm not alone.

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Speaker 2: And I think also you talking about it. I just

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Speaker 2: wonder if the reason a lot of people aren't talking

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Speaker 2: about these types of relationships and the struggles and them

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Speaker 2: is you don't ever want to say anything wrong because

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Speaker 2: you just wanted to be respectful in everything that you've

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Speaker 2: said when you you do talk about it, and that

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Speaker 2: keeps people because I don't know, I don't want to

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Speaker 2: say the wrong thing. So that probably did mean a

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Speaker 2: lot to a lot of people who.

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Speaker 5: Like, why does anybody talk about about this? So good

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Speaker 5: for you. I should be proud of yourself.

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Speaker 1: So to anybody out there dating a widower or a widow,

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Speaker 1: do you know there's a difference widowers or men and

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Speaker 1: widows or women? Really that was a long pause we're

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Speaker 1: about I was thinking.

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Speaker 2: About what I have called people. You don't call a

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Speaker 2: woman a widower, she's a widow, she's the widow. Why

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Speaker 2: does that sound sort of like.

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Speaker 4: Like, well, female male widow actor? Actress later say actor, Now,

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Speaker 4: well then maybe we progressed and it's just widow or widow, which.

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Speaker 2: My pause was I was trying to like, but then

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Speaker 2: I'm like, I don't really use that word often, so

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Speaker 2: I don't know what I say.

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Speaker 4: I didn't know either until I started dating him.

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Speaker 5: Did you google it?

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Speaker 2: Like?

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Speaker 5: What do I?

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Speaker 1: Well, he just started calling he called himself a widower

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Speaker 1: and then yeah, I think at one point I looked

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Speaker 1: it up and saw that widower man, widow woman.

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Speaker 5: Interesting. All right, well thanks for that.

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Speaker 1: So but dating a widower and the emotions that come

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Speaker 1: with that sometimes. I was crying earlier today talking to

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Speaker 1: Cat about something, and I'm in a quote. Cat, Now

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Speaker 1: this is the quote of the day, She replied back

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Speaker 1: to me. Good news is your eyebrows held up through

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Speaker 1: the cry?

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Speaker 2: They did?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, because if you're if you're new here, I lasered

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Speaker 1: off my microbladed eyebrows and I've been drawing them on

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Speaker 1: and it takes me about ten minutes a day per

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Speaker 1: brow and they still look I'm getting faster, no total total.

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Speaker 5: Well, they looked perfect, so you should be.

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Speaker 4: I don't know that's faked, but well they look Also.

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Speaker 2: I think it's good.

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Speaker 1: It's funny that you were like, your brows survived the

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Speaker 1: cry when crying is from the eyes down.

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Speaker 2: Okay, I don't know how you guys cry. But when

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Speaker 2: I cry, I'm like, oh, and I like rubbing my

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Speaker 2: face I have.

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Speaker 1: I think I still have probably a makeup on my

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Speaker 1: sleeve because I was like doing this.

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Speaker 5: You probably did a very like dainty cry. Is that

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Speaker 5: what it was like?

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Speaker 2: Cry?

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Speaker 4: Like, I think I still have streaks in my makeup

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Speaker 4: or whatever work.

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Speaker 5: If there is wetness, I could see it get in

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Speaker 5: my eyebrow. I'm an ugly anyway.

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Speaker 1: Quote of the day, Yeah, quote me, Yeah, quote Kat

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Speaker 1: good news. Is your eyebrows held up through the cry? Okay,

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Speaker 1: so Shannon did a little researcher. Widow is a woman

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Speaker 1: whose husband has died, while a widower is a man

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Speaker 1: whose wife has died.

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Speaker 2: She's confirming yes.

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Speaker 1: Both terms are used to describe someone who has lost

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Speaker 1: their spouse through death and has typically not remarried. Well,

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Speaker 1: so you no longer If Alex and I get married,

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Speaker 1: is he no longer? He wouldn't be a widower anymore,

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Speaker 1: because now he's.

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Speaker 5: No longer a husband, but he still is though he is.

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Speaker 4: But I'm alive if I marry him.

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Speaker 2: That means and at one time he was.

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Speaker 4: Okay, he was a widower and now he's a husband.

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Speaker 1: Okay, we can we call it he's a wedded widower?

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Speaker 2: Why?

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Speaker 4: Okay, Shanon's got it. Remarriage.

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Speaker 1: While the terms are usually used when a person is

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Speaker 1: not remarried, a woman who remarries is no longer referred

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Speaker 1: to as a widow. Similarly, a man who remarries is

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Speaker 1: no longer considered a widow or the more you know.

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Speaker 4: These are the fact.

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Speaker 2: The more you know. Now, now you guys know how

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Speaker 2: to go into those kinds of conversations prepared. Yeah, now

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Speaker 2: you know.

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Speaker 4: Okay, Kat, I need to know. Did you watch Body

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Speaker 4: in the Snow?

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Speaker 2: I was waiting for you to ask me this. I

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Speaker 2: watched it and Patrick watched it. Disclaimer This is a

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Speaker 2: spoiler alert for anybody who has not watched this and

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Speaker 2: wants to watch Body in the Snow, which is a

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Speaker 2: documentary on what was on Matt Max. Okay, it's Karen Reid.

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Speaker 2: By the way, we didn't know if it was red

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Speaker 2: or read.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, it's read.

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Speaker 5: Okay, so I can free right now that I gave

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Speaker 5: the spoiler alert. I wait, am I gonna say what

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Speaker 5: I think?

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Speaker 1: Yeah?

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Speaker 2: Okay, because I do not know what you say.

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Speaker 4: At the same time, Sure.

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Speaker 2: We're gonna say guilty or not guilty? Okay, one, two three?

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Speaker 2: I don't you think he's guilty guilty? Oh? My really? Yes?

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Speaker 2: Really yes. Also, she is not a likable person in

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Speaker 2: that documentary. There's no likability.

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Speaker 4: Well, I'm trying to figure out what I would be

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Speaker 4: like if I was you.

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Speaker 1: Would not be on trial for allegedly murdering my boyfriend.

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Speaker 1: And I was like, I probably wouldn't act like she's acting.

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Speaker 2: You wouldn't. But also she's from Boston, so I don't

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Speaker 2: I know, personalities are different. And she did say something

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Speaker 2: in the very beginning where she was like, I don't

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Speaker 2: like talking about this because no matter how I answer questions,

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Speaker 2: people are going to pick apart my answer the way

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Speaker 2: they want it to be. So if I smile, it

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Speaker 2: means this, But if I don't smile, it also means this.

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Speaker 2: So I can't do anything right. So I get that,

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Speaker 2: and it must be really hard. I was also wondering

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Speaker 2: did they know they were going to make a documentary

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Speaker 2: about this trial before the trial, because why did.

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Speaker 5: They film that?

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Speaker 4: I mean, maybe, I'm not sure I was.

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Speaker 2: I was curious because they were they filmed it while

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Speaker 2: the trial was happening. I just thought that I've never

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Speaker 2: seen something like that where.

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Speaker 1: You get this like usually like inside, look at what's

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Speaker 1: happening from the get go.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, okay, these are my thoughts. She Turtleman, you know,

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Speaker 2: I'm talking about Turtle Boy. Interesting part of the show.

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Speaker 2: People are way too invested with her fans, like the

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Speaker 2: fanfare of it all very strange. I actually, for the

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Speaker 2: first two episodes thought that she wasn't guilty. And I

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Speaker 2: don't know if it's the evidence that I believe that

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Speaker 2: proves it was her. The evidence isn't that strong. It's

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Speaker 2: the vibe.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, but I just don't think someone can be guilty

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Speaker 4: because of their vibe.

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Speaker 5: Well that's my opinion, right, you put me on the jury.

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Speaker 5: She is guilty.

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Speaker 1: You put me on the jury, and I'm like, whoever

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Speaker 1: spoke last? And I'm like yeah, yeah, I'm like wow, okay,

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Speaker 1: because every time like her guy would speak, I'd be like, oh, man.

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Speaker 4: Got him, got him?

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Speaker 5: Yeah, wow's good.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, he's good.

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Speaker 1: And I was like, she's innocent, and then the other

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Speaker 1: people would speak and I would be like, oh my gosh,

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Speaker 1: she did it.

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Speaker 2: But that prosecutor, I know some help.

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Speaker 5: If I was on the jury, I don't think I would.

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Speaker 5: I think I would say, I don't know.

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Speaker 2: I don't. It's not definitive enough for me to put

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Speaker 2: her in jail for the rest of her life. But

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Speaker 2: since I'm not on the jury, I feel more freedom

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Speaker 2: and sane. I think she did it okay, which is

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Speaker 2: it's a mistrial.

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Speaker 1: But we'll keep we'll talking about it in case people

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Speaker 1: want to watch it and they fast forward a little bit.

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Speaker 4: Hey, we're done talking about body in the snow.

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Speaker 2: Oh, yeah, we're done. You can listen to us now,

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Speaker 2: mm hmm.

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Speaker 1: Hello, hello, hello, Yeah, but you gave your verdict, and really, honestly,

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Speaker 1: I'm dead serious about mine. I'm telling you is why

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Speaker 1: I can't be on a jury. You don't if you

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Speaker 1: did something you do not want me.

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Speaker 5: You'd be the person that makes the jury a hung jury.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, Like we'd be in deliberation for like a long time.

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Speaker 1: I'd be like, book your hotel rooms, people, we're gonna

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Speaker 1: be here a while.

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Speaker 4: Can we get some snacks?

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Speaker 5: How long do you get do you know?

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Speaker 1: Like?

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Speaker 5: How long does a jury get until it's a hung dury?

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Speaker 4: Oh?

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Speaker 1: I don't know. Maybe I get that information, we get

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Speaker 1: that thanks got our fact checker over there.

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Speaker 4: So wait, you got scammed somehow.

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Speaker 2: Okay, I'm glad you brought this up.

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Speaker 5: I got scammed.

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Speaker 2: The one who's been looking out for your scamming got god.

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Speaker 4: Yes, if you are laying on top of this, how

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Speaker 4: did you get got?

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Speaker 2: So? You know last week I told you that your

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Speaker 2: eyeball was as big as a tangerine or a clementine.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, and I think I even supported that because I'm like, yeah,

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Speaker 1: I've heard, but I feel like it is well.

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Speaker 2: I was telling I was telling everybody this fact. I

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Speaker 2: posted on my Instagram. I was telling girls at work,

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Speaker 2: so it's the scam. Well. So one of my therapists

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Speaker 2: at work was like, that doesn't feel right, and I

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Speaker 2: was like, no, this lady that I took her training,

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Speaker 2: she told me. She even brought an orange to show

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Speaker 2: me how big an eyeball was. That's how convinced she

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Speaker 2: was that the eyeball was that big.

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Speaker 1: Okay, but an orange is one size, and then a tangerine.

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Speaker 1: There can be tangerines that are size of a ping

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Speaker 1: bong ball, and nur as is the size of a

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Speaker 1: ping pong ball.

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Speaker 2: She brought like a b Okay, are you talking about

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Speaker 2: a bing bong ball? Or a ping pong ball, I said.

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Speaker 4: I said, I said a ping pong ball? What a

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Speaker 4: ping pong ball?

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Speaker 5: Stop? Say slow down a ping.

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Speaker 1: I have tangerines in my fridge right now that are

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Speaker 1: the size.

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Speaker 4: Of a ping pong ball.

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Speaker 5: Why I want you to breathe and then say ping

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Speaker 5: pong ball.

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Speaker 1: It's just because I put emphasis probably on pong okay,

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Speaker 1: ping pong pong ball.

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Speaker 2: Put it together, ping pong ball, perfect, ping pong ball.

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Speaker 2: I thought you were saying ping pong ball.

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Speaker 4: No, No, I'm saying ping pong ball.

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Speaker 2: Okay, okay, I'm not trying to shame the way you

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Speaker 2: talk about. Sorry, keep going. Oh so anybody somebody was like, cat,

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Speaker 2: that's not true, and I was like, yeah, it is,

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Speaker 2: And so I went to Google because I was gonna

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Speaker 2: prove it.

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Speaker 4: Uh huh.

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Speaker 2: It's the size of it is the size of a

401
00:17:33,440 --> 00:17:36,520
Speaker 2: ping pong ball, A ping pong ball in a clementine

402
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Speaker 2: orange are not the same. She brought an orange that

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Speaker 2: like a clementine that.

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00:17:40,240 --> 00:17:41,200
Speaker 5: Was like a little cutie.

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Speaker 2: It's at least double the size of a can we

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Speaker 2: get the size of a clementine orange. I think that

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Speaker 2: they they vary. There are some that she brought. But

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Speaker 2: my point is she brought a big one. She brought

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Speaker 2: one that was not the size of a bing bong ball,

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Speaker 2: So then you're a long. She brought like a naval orange. No, no,

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Speaker 2: she brought a clementine, but it was double the size

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Speaker 2: of a ping pong heay.

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Speaker 1: Well, she just picked up a big one. But I

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Speaker 1: do think they have smaller ones.

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Speaker 2: My point is if she thought that the eyeball was

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Speaker 2: the size of a ping pong ball, she would have

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Speaker 2: brought us a ping pong ball. She was saying, the

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Speaker 2: eyeball is huge. It's bigger than you thought it was.

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Speaker 2: This is how big it right? Right?

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Speaker 4: Okay?

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Speaker 5: So I believed her because she's I went to her training.

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Speaker 5: I trusted her. I was paying her a lot of money,

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Speaker 5: and she got me.

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Speaker 1: So do you think she meant after you peel it,

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Speaker 1: because sometimes when you remove the skin, what's actually left

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Speaker 1: is smaller.

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Speaker 2: If she thought it was after you peeled it, then

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Speaker 2: she would have said, your eyeball is the size of

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Speaker 2: a clementine after you peel it, okay, or she would

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Speaker 2: have just.

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Speaker 5: Okay.

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Speaker 1: So clementines are small, such as fruits, generally about two

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Speaker 1: inches in diameter.

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Speaker 5: So double the size because a.

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Speaker 4: Ping pong ball it was like one inch, right.

436
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Speaker 5: It's one yeah.

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00:19:00,880 --> 00:19:02,800
Speaker 2: Yeah, So I don't know if she meant I think

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Speaker 2: she really thinks that. So I don't know who told

439
00:19:05,080 --> 00:19:07,840
Speaker 2: her that, But I learned a lesson that I even

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00:19:07,840 --> 00:19:11,240
Speaker 2: if I learned something from a trusted person, I should

441
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Speaker 2: really critically think about it before I put it on

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Speaker 2: a podcast.

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Speaker 4: Or that's why we fact check everything here.

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Speaker 2: We're going to start now. We should have like you

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Speaker 2: know you do.

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Speaker 4: I'm about to tell you how long a juror has okay,

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Speaker 4: but or a.

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Speaker 2: Jury you know how on Armchair Expert they do fact

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Speaker 2: check at the end of every episode episode. We should

450
00:19:30,600 --> 00:19:33,199
Speaker 2: allow ourselves that grace because sometimes we say things and

451
00:19:33,720 --> 00:19:35,399
Speaker 2: I wanted the chance to clear this up. Thank you

452
00:19:35,400 --> 00:19:38,480
Speaker 2: guys for being with me on this Clementine journey. Yeah,

453
00:19:38,640 --> 00:19:40,320
Speaker 2: we might have to start fact checking.

454
00:19:40,359 --> 00:19:40,840
Speaker 4: You're welcome.

455
00:19:40,880 --> 00:19:42,880
Speaker 1: Although I think size of this very but she did

456
00:19:42,920 --> 00:19:44,760
Speaker 1: have one there as a demo that was too big.

457
00:19:45,760 --> 00:19:47,320
Speaker 5: You really want her to because have.

458
00:19:47,280 --> 00:19:49,719
Speaker 1: You ever seen sometimes at Chipotle do you go did

459
00:19:49,760 --> 00:19:51,639
Speaker 1: Chipotle get the kid's meal and it comes with a

460
00:19:51,680 --> 00:19:53,439
Speaker 1: fruit cup or a bagg of chips and you get

461
00:19:53,480 --> 00:19:55,840
Speaker 1: fruit cup and it's a little teeny tiny orange that

462
00:19:55,880 --> 00:19:56,640
Speaker 1: fits in the cup.

463
00:19:57,480 --> 00:19:59,440
Speaker 4: It's it's the size of a ping bob pole.

464
00:20:00,080 --> 00:20:03,240
Speaker 2: But my point with that is that's not the size

465
00:20:03,280 --> 00:20:03,960
Speaker 2: she brought us.

466
00:20:04,040 --> 00:20:07,560
Speaker 1: Okay, I know, but if you were then saying that online,

467
00:20:07,720 --> 00:20:11,040
Speaker 1: I don't think that you sounded that offze. It's not

468
00:20:11,080 --> 00:20:13,880
Speaker 1: like you were online holding a big orange would be like,

469
00:20:14,240 --> 00:20:14,680
Speaker 1: this is.

470
00:20:14,640 --> 00:20:16,159
Speaker 2: The size of you're kind of finding me.

471
00:20:16,480 --> 00:20:18,520
Speaker 1: Yeah, Like I'm saying, like, I don't think you you

472
00:20:18,600 --> 00:20:20,880
Speaker 1: came off as a scammer moron.

473
00:20:21,040 --> 00:20:22,879
Speaker 2: Okay, Yeah, well you weren't trying to.

474
00:20:23,119 --> 00:20:24,560
Speaker 5: I didn't feel like I was a moron.

475
00:20:24,640 --> 00:20:27,359
Speaker 2: It was more so like I got got like I

476
00:20:27,440 --> 00:20:30,000
Speaker 2: was a gullible and I should have thought more critically

477
00:20:30,040 --> 00:20:32,840
Speaker 2: about that. So I will now be thinking more critically

478
00:20:32,880 --> 00:20:34,800
Speaker 2: with Google before I share those kinds of facts.

479
00:20:34,880 --> 00:20:35,400
Speaker 4: Yeah.

480
00:20:35,600 --> 00:20:38,240
Speaker 1: So, speaking of Google and Shannon, thank you. Now we

481
00:20:38,280 --> 00:20:42,880
Speaker 1: know there is no fixed time for a jury. There's

482
00:20:42,880 --> 00:20:45,359
Speaker 1: no specific number of hours or days after which a

483
00:20:45,440 --> 00:20:49,159
Speaker 1: jury automatically becomes a hung jury. The judge ultimately decides

484
00:20:49,200 --> 00:20:53,280
Speaker 1: if the jury is deadlocked, and further deliberation won't lead

485
00:20:53,280 --> 00:20:55,920
Speaker 1: to a verdict, which you did see at the end

486
00:20:55,960 --> 00:20:58,680
Speaker 1: of the documentary won't say exactly what the judge says,

487
00:20:58,720 --> 00:21:01,560
Speaker 1: but I watched that part twice actually, because I was like, wait,

488
00:21:01,600 --> 00:21:02,760
Speaker 1: what are the judge just said?

489
00:21:02,800 --> 00:21:04,000
Speaker 4: I'm not going to do that to y'all.

490
00:21:04,280 --> 00:21:06,560
Speaker 2: Okay, So can I be honest about something? What I

491
00:21:06,560 --> 00:21:08,840
Speaker 2: don't think I saw like the last twenty minutes.

492
00:21:08,760 --> 00:21:10,719
Speaker 4: And you didn't see the last twenty minutes, and you're

493
00:21:10,720 --> 00:21:11,480
Speaker 4: saying she's guilty.

494
00:21:11,880 --> 00:21:14,760
Speaker 2: Yeah, I fell asleep, and then I I Patrick said

495
00:21:14,760 --> 00:21:16,240
Speaker 2: you didn't see the last twenty minutes, and I was like,

496
00:21:16,280 --> 00:21:18,520
Speaker 2: I think I got it, So maybe.

497
00:21:18,280 --> 00:21:19,560
Speaker 5: I'll go back and watch that far.

498
00:21:22,280 --> 00:21:24,280
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't know that either one of

499
00:21:24,359 --> 00:21:25,479
Speaker 4: us would be good on a jury.

500
00:21:25,880 --> 00:21:26,960
Speaker 5: Your hair looks good today.

501
00:21:27,200 --> 00:21:30,800
Speaker 4: Why what I do? Does it because I crimped.

502
00:21:30,520 --> 00:21:34,040
Speaker 1: It or I did the I had that Little Mermaid

503
00:21:34,080 --> 00:21:37,480
Speaker 1: the three prong or it's called three barrel clamper.

504
00:21:37,720 --> 00:21:42,240
Speaker 2: I was just trying to give you a compliment. Oh

505
00:21:42,280 --> 00:21:43,880
Speaker 2: and you were one of the why So I read

506
00:21:43,880 --> 00:21:48,000
Speaker 2: this article from Psychology Today last weekend, and it was

507
00:21:48,040 --> 00:21:52,840
Speaker 2: talking about why flattery is so difficult for women specifically

508
00:21:53,000 --> 00:21:56,440
Speaker 2: to consume. So I was seeing how you were when

509
00:21:56,480 --> 00:21:59,320
Speaker 2: you took compliments and you that was me?

510
00:21:59,400 --> 00:22:02,240
Speaker 1: Why, Yeah, that's pretty much what I do. So, oh,

511
00:22:02,280 --> 00:22:05,080
Speaker 1: your makeup looks good? Why or you'd be like, oh no,

512
00:22:05,240 --> 00:22:06,000
Speaker 1: or I like your outfit.

513
00:22:06,080 --> 00:22:08,200
Speaker 5: Why is that what you usually say?

514
00:22:08,240 --> 00:22:08,440
Speaker 2: Why?

515
00:22:08,520 --> 00:22:10,920
Speaker 5: I don't really know I got it on sale or this?

516
00:22:11,040 --> 00:22:13,800
Speaker 2: Well, I've had it forever. I always say if somebody

517
00:22:13,800 --> 00:22:16,159
Speaker 2: says I like your shirt, oh thanks, it was unclear

518
00:22:16,160 --> 00:22:17,120
Speaker 2: into his five dollars.

519
00:22:17,160 --> 00:22:18,399
Speaker 5: Like sometimes I say.

520
00:22:18,280 --> 00:22:20,520
Speaker 2: That even if it wasn't on sale.

521
00:22:20,840 --> 00:22:21,000
Speaker 1: Why.

522
00:22:21,440 --> 00:22:22,040
Speaker 5: I don't know.

523
00:22:22,040 --> 00:22:23,120
Speaker 4: What a weird thing?

524
00:22:23,520 --> 00:22:25,040
Speaker 5: I think sometimes I have to have like.

525
00:22:25,160 --> 00:22:26,640
Speaker 1: It in a bad way, but like it's just that's

526
00:22:26,640 --> 00:22:27,440
Speaker 1: an odd Uh.

527
00:22:27,480 --> 00:22:31,639
Speaker 5: I know, I'm a liar. I'm a liar now, I

528
00:22:31,960 --> 00:22:32,760
Speaker 5: think I get so.

529
00:22:33,040 --> 00:22:36,159
Speaker 2: I don't think you're a liar. That's a lie. If

530
00:22:36,160 --> 00:22:37,720
Speaker 2: I didn't get on sale, I told you I got

531
00:22:37,720 --> 00:22:39,920
Speaker 2: it on sale, that's a lie. I'm a liar.

532
00:22:40,160 --> 00:22:41,760
Speaker 4: Yeah, that is weirdy weird liar.

533
00:22:44,640 --> 00:22:48,399
Speaker 2: So I think I do that because I don't know

534
00:22:48,400 --> 00:22:51,399
Speaker 2: how to just receive that. It just like feels like

535
00:22:51,480 --> 00:22:54,240
Speaker 2: that can't be true. In this article confirmed that it

536
00:22:54,320 --> 00:22:57,760
Speaker 2: was talking about how it brings about this thing called

537
00:22:57,800 --> 00:22:58,840
Speaker 2: cognitive dissonance.

538
00:22:59,160 --> 00:23:01,880
Speaker 5: You know what I mean, I say, I think two things.

539
00:23:01,720 --> 00:23:03,760
Speaker 2: Are not able to like sit in our brain, right,

540
00:23:03,800 --> 00:23:06,720
Speaker 2: I believe like if I think my outfit's ugly, or

541
00:23:06,720 --> 00:23:08,960
Speaker 2: if I think that I can't dress well, or if

542
00:23:09,000 --> 00:23:11,879
Speaker 2: I have some negative belief about me and what I

543
00:23:11,920 --> 00:23:12,320
Speaker 2: look like.

544
00:23:12,760 --> 00:23:13,520
Speaker 5: Or your hair.

545
00:23:14,359 --> 00:23:16,399
Speaker 2: Do you have some thoughts about your hair lately?

546
00:23:17,000 --> 00:23:18,280
Speaker 4: Yeah, I felt like it's a little frizzy.

547
00:23:18,280 --> 00:23:22,080
Speaker 2: But yeah, so exactly, So you can't receive that because

548
00:23:22,080 --> 00:23:24,280
Speaker 2: it goes against what I'm already believing.

549
00:23:24,600 --> 00:23:27,359
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, so if there's a disconnect.

550
00:23:27,000 --> 00:23:31,280
Speaker 2: Yes, And I think also they were saying that paired

551
00:23:31,320 --> 00:23:35,400
Speaker 2: with women are taught to be like modest and not

552
00:23:35,560 --> 00:23:38,760
Speaker 2: to be like boastful, so we don't also want to

553
00:23:38,800 --> 00:23:41,359
Speaker 2: accept that because it feels like almost like prideful. We

554
00:23:41,400 --> 00:23:42,240
Speaker 2: need to be more humble.

555
00:23:42,880 --> 00:23:45,520
Speaker 4: Oh that's you're just trying to be humble. Thanks, got

556
00:23:45,520 --> 00:23:46,200
Speaker 4: it on sale.

557
00:23:46,600 --> 00:23:48,879
Speaker 2: I think that's part of it, Like, oh, I can't

558
00:23:48,920 --> 00:23:51,320
Speaker 2: be like, oh, I know I love it. Like what

559
00:23:51,359 --> 00:23:53,160
Speaker 2: if you said if I say I like your hair

560
00:23:53,200 --> 00:23:55,919
Speaker 2: and you were like, I know I love it today?

561
00:23:56,440 --> 00:23:58,240
Speaker 5: That would feel weird, right, Yeah, I can.

562
00:23:58,280 --> 00:24:00,760
Speaker 1: Hear it depends on the day or the outfit, because

563
00:24:00,800 --> 00:24:03,640
Speaker 1: like I was at iHeart country festival the other night,

564
00:24:03,680 --> 00:24:05,400
Speaker 1: and I was obsessed with my outfit, like.

565
00:24:05,359 --> 00:24:06,040
Speaker 4: I loved it.

566
00:24:06,280 --> 00:24:09,080
Speaker 1: I loved it, and so yeah, when people will compliment,

567
00:24:09,200 --> 00:24:11,080
Speaker 1: I would say, thank you so much.

568
00:24:11,200 --> 00:24:13,240
Speaker 4: Ay, although a few people.

569
00:24:13,040 --> 00:24:15,560
Speaker 1: Were like, it looks like you maybe need to get

570
00:24:15,600 --> 00:24:17,960
Speaker 1: some mothballs because like a moth.

571
00:24:17,840 --> 00:24:18,480
Speaker 4: Was eating at your car.

572
00:24:18,720 --> 00:24:19,639
Speaker 5: Was it a guy that said that?

573
00:24:19,720 --> 00:24:20,320
Speaker 4: Multiple men?

574
00:24:20,560 --> 00:24:24,600
Speaker 1: Yeah, y' all circulating the mothball joke like around backstage.

575
00:24:24,640 --> 00:24:26,919
Speaker 2: But that's some I feel like my dad would always

576
00:24:26,920 --> 00:24:29,280
Speaker 2: say if you had jeans with holes in him, he'd like,

577
00:24:29,320 --> 00:24:33,000
Speaker 2: did you pay extra for those holes? That's such a dad,

578
00:24:33,040 --> 00:24:35,359
Speaker 2: And you're like, he still will say it, Yeah I did.

579
00:24:35,680 --> 00:24:37,880
Speaker 2: If he saw a picture, I'll show him a I'm

580
00:24:37,880 --> 00:24:39,560
Speaker 2: gonna send him a picture of your outfit and see

581
00:24:39,560 --> 00:24:41,200
Speaker 2: what he says. Okay, oh, say I wonder if she

582
00:24:41,280 --> 00:24:42,479
Speaker 2: paid extra for those holes?

583
00:24:42,800 --> 00:24:44,040
Speaker 4: Yeah, okay, I did.

584
00:24:45,400 --> 00:24:47,399
Speaker 2: Can you tell him she did so?

585
00:24:47,640 --> 00:24:50,320
Speaker 4: But I did feel confident that night in my outfit.

586
00:24:50,359 --> 00:24:52,280
Speaker 4: I didn't so much love. My hair was like this too.

587
00:24:52,280 --> 00:24:53,399
Speaker 1: I don't know why I keep doing this way, but

588
00:24:53,400 --> 00:24:54,879
Speaker 1: it felt a little frizzy to me, and I was

589
00:24:54,880 --> 00:24:55,760
Speaker 1: feeling a little self.

590
00:24:56,240 --> 00:24:57,879
Speaker 5: I loved you, I told you. I liked your hair

591
00:24:57,920 --> 00:24:58,560
Speaker 5: in the high pony.

592
00:24:58,600 --> 00:25:02,160
Speaker 4: Oh, thank you, good job. I'm a quick learner.

593
00:25:02,240 --> 00:25:05,440
Speaker 2: Okay, well, I have some tips for how to accept compliments.

594
00:25:05,600 --> 00:25:08,080
Speaker 2: But I thought this was very interesting from this article.

595
00:25:08,200 --> 00:25:10,840
Speaker 2: And also I want to mention this article was written

596
00:25:10,840 --> 00:25:14,040
Speaker 2: by Lindsay Goodwin. So thank you Lindsay for this article.

597
00:25:14,160 --> 00:25:14,959
Speaker 2: I really enjoyed it.

598
00:25:15,080 --> 00:25:15,800
Speaker 4: She's a PhD.

599
00:25:16,040 --> 00:25:17,200
Speaker 5: She is a doctor.

600
00:25:18,280 --> 00:25:20,840
Speaker 1: I only see that here in the notes. I don't

601
00:25:20,880 --> 00:25:23,880
Speaker 1: have no idea what this is. I just see the headline,

602
00:25:23,880 --> 00:25:25,720
Speaker 1: and I had no idea you were about to compliment

603
00:25:25,800 --> 00:25:26,840
Speaker 1: me or you needed that.

604
00:25:26,880 --> 00:25:28,879
Speaker 4: You were like, that was your intro into this. Because

605
00:25:29,119 --> 00:25:30,240
Speaker 4: I have no idea why. I was like.

606
00:25:30,200 --> 00:25:33,160
Speaker 2: Why, I think you were thrown off because I randomly

607
00:25:33,200 --> 00:25:33,600
Speaker 2: said that.

608
00:25:33,760 --> 00:25:36,280
Speaker 1: So just some insider baseball is Kat and I. We

609
00:25:36,320 --> 00:25:38,479
Speaker 1: have our little iPads here, which we're obsessed with. We

610
00:25:38,520 --> 00:25:42,200
Speaker 1: love that we got like iPads, don't you feel more professional?

611
00:25:42,640 --> 00:25:44,840
Speaker 2: Yes? I tried to use this iPad at work because

612
00:25:44,840 --> 00:25:48,000
Speaker 2: I got the pencil thing and I thought this would

613
00:25:48,000 --> 00:25:49,679
Speaker 2: be a great thing to take notes with because I

614
00:25:49,680 --> 00:25:51,439
Speaker 2: felt like I would feel so like, oh let me

615
00:25:51,480 --> 00:25:55,639
Speaker 2: get my notes out. It's a little distracting it's too loud.

616
00:25:55,720 --> 00:25:59,119
Speaker 2: It's loud, and I feel like this is too professional.

617
00:25:58,560 --> 00:26:00,560
Speaker 4: For it feels like linical.

618
00:26:00,720 --> 00:26:03,959
Speaker 1: Yes, yes, as and you want to be like a

619
00:26:04,000 --> 00:26:07,240
Speaker 1: warm suppose vibe yeah, not clinician.

620
00:26:07,680 --> 00:26:10,439
Speaker 4: Yeah, like yeah, yeah, I get that.

621
00:26:10,600 --> 00:26:13,119
Speaker 1: So anyway, we have our nifty little iPads and we

622
00:26:13,200 --> 00:26:15,240
Speaker 1: have a Google doc and Cat and I both add

623
00:26:15,240 --> 00:26:17,520
Speaker 1: to it, so like we'll have the date of the

624
00:26:17,520 --> 00:26:20,480
Speaker 1: episode and we'll just throw in like headlines or things

625
00:26:20,520 --> 00:26:22,680
Speaker 1: like all I see here is like how I knew

626
00:26:22,720 --> 00:26:25,280
Speaker 1: to say, Cat, you got scammed? All I see here

627
00:26:25,320 --> 00:26:28,239
Speaker 1: is Cat got scammed. But I had no idea what

628
00:26:28,280 --> 00:26:32,000
Speaker 1: it was about. Yeah, you know, yeah, that's and and

629
00:26:32,160 --> 00:26:35,120
Speaker 1: and my color is blue, and Cat's color is purple.

630
00:26:35,400 --> 00:26:37,679
Speaker 5: And wait, what's green? Oh that's Shannon.

631
00:26:37,760 --> 00:26:38,640
Speaker 4: Shannon's green.

632
00:26:39,200 --> 00:26:42,639
Speaker 1: So while we're talking, Shannon's over there, you know, looking

633
00:26:42,720 --> 00:26:45,600
Speaker 1: up things like the size of clementines, so that we can,

634
00:26:46,000 --> 00:26:49,119
Speaker 1: you know, teach you things here. We're trying to educate you.

635
00:26:49,320 --> 00:26:52,600
Speaker 2: Did you make purple my color? Because purple's my favorite color? Yeah?

636
00:26:52,640 --> 00:26:53,280
Speaker 5: Thanks?

637
00:26:54,200 --> 00:26:56,800
Speaker 2: Okay, back to the facts. I thought this was very

638
00:26:56,800 --> 00:26:59,560
Speaker 2: interesting before I give you the tips. It was talking

639
00:26:59,560 --> 00:27:03,800
Speaker 2: about how well a study found that women deflected or

640
00:27:03,840 --> 00:27:08,160
Speaker 2: minimized compliments from men sixty percent of the time when

641
00:27:08,160 --> 00:27:11,239
Speaker 2: the compliment winner was a woman. I'm going to ask

642
00:27:11,280 --> 00:27:13,000
Speaker 2: you this, since you haven't read this, do you think

643
00:27:13,000 --> 00:27:16,800
Speaker 2: they rejected it more or less if it was from

644
00:27:17,000 --> 00:27:19,520
Speaker 2: So when a compliment was given by a man to

645
00:27:19,600 --> 00:27:22,960
Speaker 2: a woman, the women rejected the compliment sixty percent of

646
00:27:23,000 --> 00:27:26,359
Speaker 2: the time when the compliment was given by a woman

647
00:27:26,440 --> 00:27:28,560
Speaker 2: to a woman. How often do you think they do

648
00:27:28,600 --> 00:27:31,560
Speaker 2: you think it was higher like one hundred percent, seventy

649
00:27:31,600 --> 00:27:32,040
Speaker 2: eight percent?

650
00:27:32,119 --> 00:27:33,960
Speaker 5: Okay, isn't that crazy?

651
00:27:34,040 --> 00:27:34,240
Speaker 3: Why?

652
00:27:35,320 --> 00:27:38,760
Speaker 2: I don't know why. It's maybe just because women in

653
00:27:38,840 --> 00:27:42,639
Speaker 2: general are more likely to feel like they need to

654
00:27:42,640 --> 00:27:43,280
Speaker 2: be modest.

655
00:27:43,600 --> 00:27:45,320
Speaker 5: I guess a woman a woman.

656
00:27:45,640 --> 00:27:48,560
Speaker 2: But I found that was very interesting that I'm going

657
00:27:48,640 --> 00:27:50,800
Speaker 2: to accept it from Maybe we feel like we can

658
00:27:50,840 --> 00:27:54,639
Speaker 2: be more honest with women, like I don't know, yeah,

659
00:27:54,760 --> 00:27:56,440
Speaker 2: how I just thought it was an interesting fact.

660
00:27:56,680 --> 00:27:58,160
Speaker 4: We're safe, feel more safe.

661
00:27:58,280 --> 00:27:59,720
Speaker 2: Okay, So I'm going to give you three tips to

662
00:27:59,720 --> 00:28:02,160
Speaker 2: accept compliments because I know that I can use these,

663
00:28:02,200 --> 00:28:02,480
Speaker 2: and it.

664
00:28:02,440 --> 00:28:03,320
Speaker 5: Sounds like you can't.

665
00:28:03,880 --> 00:28:04,640
Speaker 4: I definitely can.

666
00:28:05,840 --> 00:28:08,320
Speaker 2: And she said, why it matters? Accepting compliments isn't just

667
00:28:08,359 --> 00:28:11,960
Speaker 2: about boosting your ego. It's about fostering connection, which to

668
00:28:12,040 --> 00:28:15,800
Speaker 2: that it is when you give somebody a compliment. I'm like,

669
00:28:15,840 --> 00:28:18,440
Speaker 2: oh my gosh, you did such a good job on

670
00:28:18,480 --> 00:28:25,880
Speaker 2: that report that you gave in school. That's okay, let

671
00:28:25,880 --> 00:28:31,720
Speaker 2: me start off. Was that a compliment to me? I

672
00:28:31,720 --> 00:28:33,080
Speaker 2: don't know where I was going with that. Let me

673
00:28:33,119 --> 00:28:33,520
Speaker 2: try again.

674
00:28:33,600 --> 00:28:34,359
Speaker 4: Okay, try again.

675
00:28:34,440 --> 00:28:37,480
Speaker 2: Oh my gosh, you did so good hosting I heeart

676
00:28:37,600 --> 00:28:38,360
Speaker 2: this weekend.

677
00:28:38,800 --> 00:28:41,680
Speaker 1: You were just because I wasn't technically Howstbobby was. I

678
00:28:41,720 --> 00:28:44,520
Speaker 1: was just there doing I mean I I did some

679
00:28:44,560 --> 00:28:46,720
Speaker 1: things on Hulu and then I did.

680
00:28:46,560 --> 00:28:48,480
Speaker 4: Some radio stuff, but yeah, he was the host. So

681
00:28:48,520 --> 00:28:50,280
Speaker 4: you're already giving me I did a couple of stage hits.

682
00:28:51,040 --> 00:28:52,320
Speaker 5: Can I finish my compliment?

683
00:28:52,520 --> 00:28:54,040
Speaker 4: Yeah, we're playing.

684
00:28:54,080 --> 00:28:54,200
Speaker 3: You know.

685
00:28:54,240 --> 00:28:55,640
Speaker 5: It's what you did there good.

686
00:28:55,720 --> 00:28:57,840
Speaker 1: I know exactly what I was doing there. Yeah, I

687
00:28:57,920 --> 00:28:58,600
Speaker 1: was just letting you know.

688
00:29:00,840 --> 00:29:03,760
Speaker 2: You really don't want to accept my complimentage, Okay, thank you.

689
00:29:04,040 --> 00:29:08,440
Speaker 2: So when you do that, it creates like a disconnect

690
00:29:08,440 --> 00:29:10,360
Speaker 2: between somebody I'm trying to connect with you saying like,

691
00:29:10,360 --> 00:29:12,680
Speaker 2: oh my gosh, I saw some clips that you posted.

692
00:29:12,720 --> 00:29:14,240
Speaker 2: You look like you said such a good job.

693
00:29:14,520 --> 00:29:14,880
Speaker 4: Thank you.

694
00:29:15,160 --> 00:29:17,320
Speaker 2: Okay, if you're like, oh my gosh, it was horrible

695
00:29:17,320 --> 00:29:19,960
Speaker 2: blah blah blah, that is like, okay, never mind, So

696
00:29:20,000 --> 00:29:21,400
Speaker 2: I'm trying to connect with you. And a lot of

697
00:29:21,440 --> 00:29:24,400
Speaker 2: times when people give compliments, whether or not they mean

698
00:29:24,440 --> 00:29:26,520
Speaker 2: them or not, it's a point of connection to start

699
00:29:26,560 --> 00:29:27,200
Speaker 2: a conversation.

700
00:29:28,000 --> 00:29:30,440
Speaker 5: There are actually tips that people will give, like.

701
00:29:30,880 --> 00:29:35,120
Speaker 2: Small talk experts or just relationship experts in general say,

702
00:29:35,240 --> 00:29:37,800
Speaker 2: start with something common. You can go up and share

703
00:29:37,840 --> 00:29:40,080
Speaker 2: a positive note to somebody to start a conversation.

704
00:29:40,600 --> 00:29:41,280
Speaker 4: So when we.

705
00:29:41,240 --> 00:29:45,400
Speaker 1: Don't accept it or receive it, we're robbing them of

706
00:29:45,480 --> 00:29:48,960
Speaker 1: the opportunity to connect with us and in ourselves too. Yeah.

707
00:29:49,120 --> 00:29:51,240
Speaker 2: So imagine somebody new comes up to you and it's like,

708
00:29:51,280 --> 00:29:53,840
Speaker 2: oh my gosh, girl, I love your jacket, and you're like, oh,

709
00:29:53,880 --> 00:29:57,520
Speaker 2: that's so ugly. Now where do we go? Yeah, like

710
00:29:57,640 --> 00:30:02,240
Speaker 2: never mind. So just be open to conversation is a

711
00:30:02,360 --> 00:30:05,080
Speaker 2: huge part of that. So why it matters. It's a

712
00:30:05,360 --> 00:30:08,320
Speaker 2: way to connect with people. When we brush them off,

713
00:30:08,360 --> 00:30:11,080
Speaker 2: we dis miss the other person's thoughts, and learning to

714
00:30:11,120 --> 00:30:13,720
Speaker 2: accept praise can rewrite those negative stories in our head.

715
00:30:14,200 --> 00:30:17,400
Speaker 2: So if I think like, oh I don't know how

716
00:30:17,400 --> 00:30:19,720
Speaker 2: to dress, I have such bad style. Well, the more

717
00:30:19,760 --> 00:30:22,840
Speaker 2: we deflect the compliments, the more we're gonna make that

718
00:30:22,880 --> 00:30:26,360
Speaker 2: story true. The more we accept it, we're like, oh, she.

719
00:30:26,360 --> 00:30:27,600
Speaker 5: Likes my outfit. She likes my outfit.

720
00:30:27,680 --> 00:30:28,360
Speaker 4: She likes my outfit.

721
00:30:28,560 --> 00:30:43,920
Speaker 2: Maybe I know how to dress.

722
00:30:42,040 --> 00:30:44,480
Speaker 1: My outfit is awesome. I've been trying to read write

723
00:30:44,520 --> 00:30:45,920
Speaker 1: that story in my head. In the morning is when

724
00:30:45,920 --> 00:30:48,240
Speaker 1: I'm getting ready for work. I've been saying over and

725
00:30:48,240 --> 00:30:50,520
Speaker 1: over because I don't feel like I get dressed with ease,

726
00:30:50,560 --> 00:30:52,360
Speaker 1: and I don't I want to be like a little

727
00:30:52,360 --> 00:30:55,200
Speaker 1: more creative with my outfits, and I just feel like

728
00:30:55,200 --> 00:30:57,160
Speaker 1: I don't know how to put things together the way

729
00:30:57,200 --> 00:30:59,760
Speaker 1: that I would like. So in the mornings, right when

730
00:30:59,760 --> 00:31:02,120
Speaker 1: I I start this little mantra, like I go down

731
00:31:02,120 --> 00:31:04,520
Speaker 1: the kitchen, I make my coffee, and I'm like, I

732
00:31:04,520 --> 00:31:07,720
Speaker 1: put on my clothes with these. I put on my

733
00:31:07,800 --> 00:31:08,720
Speaker 1: clothes with these.

734
00:31:09,240 --> 00:31:11,520
Speaker 4: I go into my closet and it is so easy

735
00:31:11,520 --> 00:31:12,800
Speaker 4: for me to fake out clothes.

736
00:31:13,640 --> 00:31:16,400
Speaker 1: I go, you know, I just do that, keep going, yeah,

737
00:31:16,480 --> 00:31:18,760
Speaker 1: that I am creative with my clothes.

738
00:31:19,200 --> 00:31:21,520
Speaker 4: And then I put on a tan top jeans.

739
00:31:22,040 --> 00:31:25,880
Speaker 2: Okay, I was gonna say, that's so interesting because I

740
00:31:25,960 --> 00:31:28,240
Speaker 2: was actually talking to Patrick about I was like, I

741
00:31:28,240 --> 00:31:30,720
Speaker 2: feel like Amy always has something cute on on my record,

742
00:31:31,040 --> 00:31:34,440
Speaker 2: and I never know what to wear. So I was

743
00:31:34,480 --> 00:31:36,880
Speaker 2: complimenting you without you around. But it's just interesting that

744
00:31:36,960 --> 00:31:38,600
Speaker 2: you think that, but I think the opposite.

745
00:31:38,760 --> 00:31:40,760
Speaker 4: Oh see, I think you look cute and I love

746
00:31:40,800 --> 00:31:41,320
Speaker 4: your headband.

747
00:31:41,480 --> 00:31:45,320
Speaker 5: Thinks I'm trying something new. I accepted you did it good?

748
00:31:45,360 --> 00:31:47,400
Speaker 4: Yeah, you were like, thanks, I got it on sale,

749
00:31:47,840 --> 00:31:48,280
Speaker 4: just kidding.

750
00:31:48,280 --> 00:31:51,320
Speaker 2: I paid full price, so, to be honest, the only

751
00:31:51,320 --> 00:31:53,400
Speaker 2: reason I bought it is because it wasn't sale. Yeah,

752
00:31:53,440 --> 00:31:56,000
Speaker 2: that's not a lie. I told kat that earlier. Just

753
00:31:56,000 --> 00:31:57,680
Speaker 2: because you told her that earlier doesn't make it.

754
00:31:57,560 --> 00:32:00,920
Speaker 5: It was target was to sale. Prove check it. I'll

755
00:32:00,920 --> 00:32:02,000
Speaker 5: show you my receipt.

756
00:32:01,760 --> 00:32:04,200
Speaker 1: Okay, okay, receipt or it didn't happen, Okay, I'll show

757
00:32:04,200 --> 00:32:04,680
Speaker 1: it to you later.

758
00:32:05,120 --> 00:32:07,040
Speaker 4: That's so funny that that's like your lie.

759
00:32:07,720 --> 00:32:09,720
Speaker 2: I don't think I always lie, but I've just caught

760
00:32:09,760 --> 00:32:11,920
Speaker 2: myself before, and I'm like, why did I just tell

761
00:32:12,120 --> 00:32:12,640
Speaker 2: my God, I.

762
00:32:15,760 --> 00:32:16,080
Speaker 4: Don't know.

763
00:32:16,320 --> 00:32:19,440
Speaker 2: I'd be like, no, I didn't. Yeah, yeah, I'm just kidding.

764
00:32:19,440 --> 00:32:21,200
Speaker 2: I don't know why I said that. I'm a liar.

765
00:32:25,160 --> 00:32:28,880
Speaker 1: They were like okay, like not looking for connection with

766
00:32:28,920 --> 00:32:30,360
Speaker 1: you anymore, that's for sure.

767
00:32:33,920 --> 00:32:35,920
Speaker 2: I don't want people to think that I lie to them.

768
00:32:36,000 --> 00:32:38,240
Speaker 1: In general, I get it like it's a you're trying,

769
00:32:38,320 --> 00:32:39,520
Speaker 1: it's you're uncomfortable.

770
00:32:39,600 --> 00:32:42,400
Speaker 2: I will never do it again saying it.

771
00:32:42,840 --> 00:32:44,560
Speaker 4: Yeah, okay.

772
00:32:44,720 --> 00:32:47,560
Speaker 2: So do you want three tips to accept compliments? Yes? Okay.

773
00:32:48,200 --> 00:32:53,880
Speaker 2: The first one, just say thank you and pause. Okay,

774
00:32:54,120 --> 00:32:57,880
Speaker 2: so thank you and then in your head say paus pause, pause, pause, pause.

775
00:32:58,280 --> 00:33:02,520
Speaker 1: I can imagine people going thank you pause, like they

776
00:33:02,560 --> 00:33:03,480
Speaker 1: say that part out loud.

777
00:33:03,520 --> 00:33:04,600
Speaker 4: Okay, so just think you pause?

778
00:33:04,680 --> 00:33:07,600
Speaker 1: Why because this allows the other person to now connect

779
00:33:07,600 --> 00:33:08,040
Speaker 1: with you more.

780
00:33:08,720 --> 00:33:12,479
Speaker 2: Well, I think that is a like an addition to

781
00:33:12,520 --> 00:33:14,880
Speaker 2: what it brings, because if I'm not feeling that space

782
00:33:14,920 --> 00:33:16,200
Speaker 2: and they can be like where did you get it?

783
00:33:16,320 --> 00:33:18,800
Speaker 2: Or they can add something else to whatever compliment they're

784
00:33:18,800 --> 00:33:21,480
Speaker 2: giving you. But the pause really is and why I said,

785
00:33:21,520 --> 00:33:24,840
Speaker 2: say it in your brain, it's removing that instinct to

786
00:33:24,880 --> 00:33:28,400
Speaker 2: give the disclaimer. So oh, like, let's if it wasn't

787
00:33:28,400 --> 00:33:31,360
Speaker 2: about my outfit. You did really great on your report

788
00:33:31,440 --> 00:33:34,200
Speaker 2: that you gave in class. Oh no, I messed up.

789
00:33:34,200 --> 00:33:35,920
Speaker 5: I forgot this whole part and blah blah blah blah

790
00:33:35,920 --> 00:33:36,280
Speaker 5: blah blah.

791
00:33:36,440 --> 00:33:37,640
Speaker 2: You go on and on and on and on and on and

792
00:33:37,560 --> 00:33:40,240
Speaker 2: on when you don't have to do that, so it

793
00:33:40,280 --> 00:33:42,120
Speaker 2: takes that spot away.

794
00:33:42,400 --> 00:33:45,520
Speaker 1: Oh I have an example too of sometimes we I

795
00:33:45,560 --> 00:33:46,840
Speaker 1: don't know if this is related at all.

796
00:33:47,000 --> 00:33:49,400
Speaker 5: Okay, let's see, we'll see.

797
00:33:50,200 --> 00:33:51,160
Speaker 2: Welcome to my brain.

798
00:33:51,880 --> 00:33:53,920
Speaker 1: But how sometimes we make things about us when it's

799
00:33:53,960 --> 00:33:57,680
Speaker 1: not about us. Where because it is related? Because someone

800
00:33:57,760 --> 00:33:59,560
Speaker 1: was trying to give me a compliment saying I did

801
00:33:59,560 --> 00:34:01,600
Speaker 1: something well well, and this was actually at iHeart. I

802
00:34:01,640 --> 00:34:04,440
Speaker 1: was doing this hit for Hulu because it's streaming live

803
00:34:04,480 --> 00:34:07,400
Speaker 1: on Hulu, and we do artist interviews backstage, and it's

804
00:34:07,440 --> 00:34:09,600
Speaker 1: really chaotic back there. It's loud, there's a lot going on.

805
00:34:09,640 --> 00:34:12,640
Speaker 1: You have a teleprompter and there's sometimes you have to

806
00:34:12,719 --> 00:34:17,719
Speaker 1: vamp and what's vamp like a they call it an accordion,

807
00:34:18,160 --> 00:34:21,920
Speaker 1: uh segment, But you vamp for however long, maybe thirty seconds,

808
00:34:21,960 --> 00:34:23,879
Speaker 1: like you just have to talk talk talk. There's nothing

809
00:34:23,920 --> 00:34:26,680
Speaker 1: on the teleprompter. It's like what was on the prompter

810
00:34:26,760 --> 00:34:28,960
Speaker 1: with sixty seconds. But now the truck, so the trucks

811
00:34:28,960 --> 00:34:31,880
Speaker 1: are outside, you know, like news trucks where they like

812
00:34:31,960 --> 00:34:34,320
Speaker 1: do all the editing and streaming, so the Hulu truck

813
00:34:34,360 --> 00:34:36,879
Speaker 1: was outside, so they say, the guys in the truck say,

814
00:34:36,920 --> 00:34:38,960
Speaker 1: now we need thirty more seconds, so you need to

815
00:34:39,000 --> 00:34:41,520
Speaker 1: just vamp, or you need we need sixty more seconds,

816
00:34:41,600 --> 00:34:45,719
Speaker 1: or sometimes even god forbid, two minutes, which feels like

817
00:34:46,280 --> 00:34:50,560
Speaker 1: eternity in vamp world. So you know going into it

818
00:34:50,600 --> 00:34:53,359
Speaker 1: that you may have an accordion section, so you kind

819
00:34:53,360 --> 00:34:55,279
Speaker 1: of have some stories in your mind.

820
00:34:56,040 --> 00:34:58,120
Speaker 4: But there was a.

821
00:34:58,080 --> 00:35:02,040
Speaker 1: Situation where he was setting holding up his iPad with

822
00:35:02,239 --> 00:35:04,719
Speaker 1: thirty more seconds, but he put it to the right

823
00:35:04,800 --> 00:35:07,479
Speaker 1: of the camera and when really under the camera would

824
00:35:07,480 --> 00:35:10,160
Speaker 1: have been an easier spot for me to see, so

825
00:35:10,239 --> 00:35:13,600
Speaker 1: I couldn't see. Otherwise I'm like gazing off camera, and

826
00:35:13,680 --> 00:35:17,080
Speaker 1: I kind of thought the vamping was over and it wasn't,

827
00:35:17,440 --> 00:35:18,759
Speaker 1: so then I had to keep going and I was

828
00:35:18,760 --> 00:35:19,560
Speaker 1: stumbling my words.

829
00:35:19,600 --> 00:35:19,880
Speaker 4: Whatever.

830
00:35:19,960 --> 00:35:22,880
Speaker 1: Well, when we got done, the guy with the headset

831
00:35:23,120 --> 00:35:24,680
Speaker 1: he was listening to the truck and I saw him

832
00:35:24,719 --> 00:35:28,200
Speaker 1: make some face and I instantly was like, oh, I suck.

833
00:35:28,560 --> 00:35:29,440
Speaker 4: I didn't handle that.

834
00:35:29,400 --> 00:35:31,200
Speaker 1: Well, like I messed up, and that he made this

835
00:35:31,320 --> 00:35:34,320
Speaker 1: face and da da dah. Well, then my girl, Elizabeth,

836
00:35:34,680 --> 00:35:37,799
Speaker 1: you know Buzzio she sent me a text when I

837
00:35:38,400 --> 00:35:40,680
Speaker 1: like twelve hours later, because I guess she talked to

838
00:35:40,719 --> 00:35:42,400
Speaker 1: some people and she said, hey, by the way, I

839
00:35:42,440 --> 00:35:44,319
Speaker 1: know you got real worked up, but I got worked up,

840
00:35:44,320 --> 00:35:46,440
Speaker 1: and I let it almost impact my performance for the

841
00:35:46,480 --> 00:35:49,279
Speaker 1: rest of the night because of his face. And I'm like, no, no,

842
00:35:49,320 --> 00:35:53,160
Speaker 1: I saw his face, like they're disappointed. That was horrible.

843
00:35:53,719 --> 00:35:56,440
Speaker 1: And she said that the truck had said something completely

844
00:35:56,440 --> 00:35:58,319
Speaker 1: different to him, it had nothing to do with me,

845
00:35:58,400 --> 00:36:01,319
Speaker 1: and he made the face, and he also was mad

846
00:36:01,360 --> 00:36:03,840
Speaker 1: at himself for putting it to the side and not underneath,

847
00:36:04,280 --> 00:36:07,160
Speaker 1: and like the truck sent a whole apology to Elizabeth

848
00:36:07,200 --> 00:36:08,840
Speaker 1: to forward to me, and they said, let Amy know

849
00:36:08,920 --> 00:36:12,480
Speaker 1: that was one hundred percent our fault and we take responsibility.

850
00:36:12,520 --> 00:36:15,040
Speaker 1: And but it did sort of derail some of my

851
00:36:15,080 --> 00:36:16,759
Speaker 1: performance the rest of the night because and I'm reading

852
00:36:16,840 --> 00:36:20,080
Speaker 1: a prompter on the main stage, and if you start

853
00:36:20,160 --> 00:36:22,959
Speaker 1: to get nervous, fumbled, and you're all in your head,

854
00:36:23,480 --> 00:36:27,120
Speaker 1: you're more likely to mess up more. So I had

855
00:36:27,160 --> 00:36:30,319
Speaker 1: to like really use the power of thought to like

856
00:36:30,560 --> 00:36:33,400
Speaker 1: push that face that he made out of my brain.

857
00:36:33,480 --> 00:36:35,359
Speaker 1: But the rest of the night I definitely still thought

858
00:36:35,360 --> 00:36:36,920
Speaker 1: it was about me. Until twelve hours later when she

859
00:36:36,960 --> 00:36:38,319
Speaker 1: texted me and she was like, Amy, that had nothing

860
00:36:38,360 --> 00:36:41,040
Speaker 1: to do with you, And I was like, oh, well.

861
00:36:40,880 --> 00:36:43,120
Speaker 4: Gosh darn it, I made it about I made it

862
00:36:43,160 --> 00:36:43,640
Speaker 4: about me.

863
00:36:44,120 --> 00:36:47,480
Speaker 1: And so it's just a reminder to like, don't make

864
00:36:47,600 --> 00:36:49,759
Speaker 1: up stories, right, you know, we talk about that part,

865
00:36:49,840 --> 00:36:54,000
Speaker 1: but then also receive the compliment, because at the time

866
00:36:54,080 --> 00:36:56,120
Speaker 1: Elizabeth is like standing side shage. She's like, I saw

867
00:36:56,120 --> 00:36:58,040
Speaker 1: the whole thing you did great, but I was so

868
00:36:58,120 --> 00:37:00,400
Speaker 1: worked up about his face that I couldn't receive her compliment.

869
00:37:00,760 --> 00:37:02,520
Speaker 5: So this is going to tie into another one of

870
00:37:02,520 --> 00:37:03,000
Speaker 5: our tips.

871
00:37:03,000 --> 00:37:05,480
Speaker 4: Boom see, I knew, thank you. I knew it was relatable.

872
00:37:06,239 --> 00:37:10,960
Speaker 2: So consider the evidence is a second tip. When you

873
00:37:11,000 --> 00:37:15,760
Speaker 2: want to downplay the compliment, take a second and consider

874
00:37:15,880 --> 00:37:18,680
Speaker 2: the evidence. People with lower self esteem, or if you

875
00:37:18,760 --> 00:37:20,759
Speaker 2: just are like anxious or have low self esteem about

876
00:37:20,760 --> 00:37:24,200
Speaker 2: one thing, self conscious about one thing, they tend to

877
00:37:24,239 --> 00:37:26,799
Speaker 2: paint themselves with a broad stroke brush, which is like

878
00:37:26,840 --> 00:37:29,240
Speaker 2: all or nothing, black and white thinking. So when Sony

879
00:37:29,280 --> 00:37:32,919
Speaker 2: gives you a compliment about something, consider the evidence for

880
00:37:33,000 --> 00:37:34,640
Speaker 2: that compliment versus.

881
00:37:34,400 --> 00:37:35,520
Speaker 5: The evidence against it.

882
00:37:35,920 --> 00:37:39,200
Speaker 2: So you were thinking about all the negative stuff versus wait,

883
00:37:39,480 --> 00:37:42,759
Speaker 2: considering all the circumstances, I did a pretty good job

884
00:37:43,239 --> 00:37:46,400
Speaker 2: with what I was vamping, vamping if I had to vamp.

885
00:37:46,640 --> 00:37:50,000
Speaker 2: Sometimes when you say filibuster when we're recording, I'm like,

886
00:37:50,320 --> 00:37:53,320
Speaker 2: I have nothing in my brain, Like it just goes blank.

887
00:37:53,520 --> 00:37:56,960
Speaker 1: So I definitely fumbled, But I mean I think that's

888
00:37:57,000 --> 00:37:58,799
Speaker 1: to be expected. And a lot they're like, look, you

889
00:37:58,880 --> 00:38:01,239
Speaker 1: had to like juggle, you handled it well, but I

890
00:38:01,239 --> 00:38:02,160
Speaker 1: couldn't receive that.

891
00:38:02,680 --> 00:38:04,480
Speaker 4: But I feel like you always handle it well.

892
00:38:05,080 --> 00:38:05,239
Speaker 2: Well.

893
00:38:05,239 --> 00:38:10,280
Speaker 1: Thank you you yeah, post post post pust pause, You're welcome.

894
00:38:11,640 --> 00:38:12,000
Speaker 2: Okay.

895
00:38:12,480 --> 00:38:16,200
Speaker 5: The last tip is revisit your compliments later. I thought

896
00:38:16,200 --> 00:38:17,400
Speaker 5: this was interesting.

897
00:38:17,120 --> 00:38:20,120
Speaker 4: Like with yourself, bear with me, this feels weird.

898
00:38:20,239 --> 00:38:23,440
Speaker 2: Maybe keep a compliment journal. No way, so see it

899
00:38:23,480 --> 00:38:25,960
Speaker 2: feels so wrong, but this is why it's not.

900
00:38:27,560 --> 00:38:28,080
Speaker 5: Be open.

901
00:38:28,440 --> 00:38:29,680
Speaker 2: I need you to be open.

902
00:38:29,719 --> 00:38:30,880
Speaker 5: Can you just give me an open?

903
00:38:30,920 --> 00:38:32,960
Speaker 2: Thank you give me an open You're giving me bad

904
00:38:33,000 --> 00:38:34,080
Speaker 2: body language. Be open.

905
00:38:34,719 --> 00:38:39,719
Speaker 1: Cry Okat's like I'm I'm gonna tattoo the ma my body.

906
00:38:40,280 --> 00:38:42,960
Speaker 2: Cat is like, can you actually send me some compliments

907
00:38:43,000 --> 00:38:44,480
Speaker 2: later so I can put them in my journal?

908
00:38:44,640 --> 00:38:50,040
Speaker 1: The thing is words of words of affirmation. Is that's

909
00:38:50,040 --> 00:38:52,600
Speaker 1: my love language like, I like words of affirmation.

910
00:38:53,080 --> 00:38:54,680
Speaker 5: Why is it weird for you to give them to yourself?

911
00:38:55,160 --> 00:38:55,960
Speaker 4: Well, you weren't saying that.

912
00:38:56,000 --> 00:38:57,759
Speaker 1: I thought you were saying, keep a compliment journal of

913
00:38:57,880 --> 00:38:59,360
Speaker 1: compliment you've heard from other people?

914
00:38:59,640 --> 00:39:00,520
Speaker 5: Why is that bad?

915
00:39:00,760 --> 00:39:02,959
Speaker 1: What I'm not saying it's bad. If somebody else wants

916
00:39:02,960 --> 00:39:06,000
Speaker 1: to do it, I love that for them. I don't

917
00:39:06,040 --> 00:39:10,239
Speaker 1: see myself at night being like, huh, today Kat saying

918
00:39:10,719 --> 00:39:11,680
Speaker 1: my report.

919
00:39:13,640 --> 00:39:16,600
Speaker 4: My hair looked pretty. So this is gonna help me?

920
00:39:16,640 --> 00:39:18,040
Speaker 1: Okay, fine, I need to do it because I think

921
00:39:18,080 --> 00:39:20,360
Speaker 1: I have I don't know that I have low self esteem,

922
00:39:20,400 --> 00:39:22,680
Speaker 1: but it's it can dabble down there.

923
00:39:24,520 --> 00:39:27,719
Speaker 2: I can dabble in the low self esteem. It can hang.

924
00:39:27,560 --> 00:39:29,719
Speaker 4: Low at times, but I've really been working on it

925
00:39:29,800 --> 00:39:30,359
Speaker 4: so well.

926
00:39:30,400 --> 00:39:32,520
Speaker 2: We all have things that were self conscious of, yeah,

927
00:39:32,520 --> 00:39:35,920
Speaker 2: and all the things that we're insecure about. So I

928
00:39:35,960 --> 00:39:38,200
Speaker 2: guess I was being on a little bit judgmental of you.

929
00:39:38,960 --> 00:39:43,080
Speaker 2: What makes you so off put by the idea of

930
00:39:43,120 --> 00:39:44,720
Speaker 2: a compliment journal?

931
00:39:45,320 --> 00:39:49,560
Speaker 1: Will you want me to take inventory of compliments I

932
00:39:49,640 --> 00:39:51,280
Speaker 1: received throughout the day and you want me to write

933
00:39:51,280 --> 00:39:55,000
Speaker 1: them down at night? That just does not sound like

934
00:39:55,120 --> 00:39:58,479
Speaker 1: something I could do. But I will try what's off putting,

935
00:39:58,560 --> 00:40:02,600
Speaker 1: it feels weird, it feels wrong, it feels wrong, and

936
00:40:02,840 --> 00:40:03,640
Speaker 1: self adulger.

937
00:40:03,920 --> 00:40:07,560
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, but that is what what are you trying

938
00:40:07,600 --> 00:40:15,280
Speaker 2: to say? Yeah, okay, So that speaks to the beginning

939
00:40:15,320 --> 00:40:17,480
Speaker 2: of this article is talking about how women were taught

940
00:40:17,520 --> 00:40:20,640
Speaker 2: to downplay their success and we're taught to be humble.

941
00:40:20,920 --> 00:40:24,200
Speaker 2: We're taught to like not be self indungent, indulgent, and

942
00:40:24,280 --> 00:40:27,080
Speaker 2: to accept a compliment that feels the opposite. So this

943
00:40:27,200 --> 00:40:31,120
Speaker 2: is retraining your brain to one be able to receive that. No,

944
00:40:31,239 --> 00:40:33,560
Speaker 2: it's okay for me to like know that people think

945
00:40:33,600 --> 00:40:36,080
Speaker 2: this about me. Also, it's okay if I think this

946
00:40:36,160 --> 00:40:40,000
Speaker 2: is a this about me. But outside of that part,

947
00:40:40,520 --> 00:40:43,520
Speaker 2: it's good for you to see that because when we

948
00:40:43,880 --> 00:40:47,120
Speaker 2: neglect them, even when we're doing the pause thing and

949
00:40:47,200 --> 00:40:50,960
Speaker 2: our brain we might still be like no, pause no, like,

950
00:40:51,000 --> 00:40:52,920
Speaker 2: we might still also be having.

951
00:40:52,680 --> 00:40:53,600
Speaker 5: That war in our brain.

952
00:40:54,200 --> 00:40:57,040
Speaker 2: So if we're writing them down and we are your words,

953
00:40:57,080 --> 00:40:59,719
Speaker 2: taking inventory of them, it gives us a chance to

954
00:40:59,800 --> 00:41:02,440
Speaker 2: let that sink in and then we get to if

955
00:41:02,480 --> 00:41:07,719
Speaker 2: we're having Okay, the best gift I ever received you Actually, well,

956
00:41:08,080 --> 00:41:10,000
Speaker 2: I was thinking about this because you asked us at

957
00:41:10,000 --> 00:41:14,000
Speaker 2: a dinner party months ago when I met Alex. We

958
00:41:14,040 --> 00:41:16,080
Speaker 2: did conversation cards and one of the questions you asked

959
00:41:16,120 --> 00:41:19,240
Speaker 2: us what's the best gift you ever received? And I froze.

960
00:41:19,320 --> 00:41:21,040
Speaker 2: It almost was like I was feeling you're asking me

961
00:41:21,080 --> 00:41:23,480
Speaker 2: to vamp. I froze and I said.

962
00:41:24,080 --> 00:41:25,160
Speaker 5: Do you remember what I said?

963
00:41:26,200 --> 00:41:26,960
Speaker 4: I'm trying to think.

964
00:41:27,000 --> 00:41:29,360
Speaker 1: I'm stuck on what Gracie said, because Gracie and Rudin

965
00:41:29,440 --> 00:41:31,200
Speaker 1: was there too, and that's when we learned that Gracie

966
00:41:31,239 --> 00:41:32,360
Speaker 1: was the high school mascot.

967
00:41:34,600 --> 00:41:37,360
Speaker 2: And that's when I learned that Patrick was his mascot.

968
00:41:37,360 --> 00:41:39,880
Speaker 2: I didn't know that he had so cats.

969
00:41:40,080 --> 00:41:43,120
Speaker 1: Husband and Gracie were both the high school mascot, So

970
00:41:43,200 --> 00:41:46,000
Speaker 1: then I don't that's the That's my big takeaway from

971
00:41:46,000 --> 00:41:47,760
Speaker 1: that night is the story Gracie.

972
00:41:48,160 --> 00:41:51,359
Speaker 4: I know, hilarious, So we'll revisit that later. But so now,

973
00:41:51,360 --> 00:41:53,160
Speaker 4: I don't remember your answer to your question.

974
00:41:53,360 --> 00:41:56,879
Speaker 2: I said this journal that my mom and dad thought

975
00:41:56,920 --> 00:42:00,600
Speaker 2: me the invisible one that had invisible black light pen

976
00:42:00,920 --> 00:42:02,920
Speaker 2: that was my which that gift was cool.

977
00:42:03,040 --> 00:42:04,480
Speaker 4: I feel like that is cool, but.

978
00:42:04,560 --> 00:42:05,759
Speaker 5: My favorite gift, I know.

979
00:42:05,840 --> 00:42:07,480
Speaker 2: I don't know why I didn't think this My favorite

980
00:42:07,520 --> 00:42:10,239
Speaker 2: gift I know it is, and that's why I ended

981
00:42:10,320 --> 00:42:13,400
Speaker 2: up giving it to you. Was my sister gave me

982
00:42:13,560 --> 00:42:16,520
Speaker 2: a blessing jar. This is my birthday, right after I

983
00:42:16,520 --> 00:42:18,920
Speaker 2: went through a really bad breakup where I was like

984
00:42:19,239 --> 00:42:23,000
Speaker 2: knocking out of bed. I cried every day, and she

985
00:42:23,160 --> 00:42:26,520
Speaker 2: had all my best friends write down ways that I'm

986
00:42:26,520 --> 00:42:28,239
Speaker 2: a blessing to them in their life, and then she

987
00:42:28,280 --> 00:42:29,720
Speaker 2: put them in a jar and we went to dinner.

988
00:42:29,760 --> 00:42:31,400
Speaker 2: She gave it to me, and I was a puddle

989
00:42:31,400 --> 00:42:36,120
Speaker 2: of tears, but like happy, grateful tears, and that blessing

990
00:42:36,200 --> 00:42:36,799
Speaker 2: jar I still have.

991
00:42:36,920 --> 00:42:38,680
Speaker 5: I keep it in my bathroom. I don't read them

992
00:42:38,680 --> 00:42:39,280
Speaker 5: all the time.

993
00:42:39,440 --> 00:42:41,279
Speaker 2: I used to every once in a while when I

994
00:42:41,280 --> 00:42:43,000
Speaker 2: was still trying to build myself back up in that

995
00:42:43,080 --> 00:42:47,040
Speaker 2: time would read like one a day, and that helped

996
00:42:47,040 --> 00:42:49,480
Speaker 2: me build my self esteem back up after I'd gone

997
00:42:49,520 --> 00:42:54,640
Speaker 2: through this horrible, horrible experience. And I still have it

998
00:42:54,719 --> 00:42:57,839
Speaker 2: because I think it's okay for me to acknowledge how

999
00:42:57,920 --> 00:43:00,200
Speaker 2: other people view me in a positive way.

1000
00:43:00,600 --> 00:43:02,799
Speaker 1: Yes, and I love that you gave me that too.

1001
00:43:02,840 --> 00:43:04,239
Speaker 1: I love my blessing jar. I have it in my

1002
00:43:04,280 --> 00:43:07,400
Speaker 1: closet so when i's just nice to know it's struggling

1003
00:43:07,440 --> 00:43:11,760
Speaker 1: to get dressed. I do care it in my closet.

1004
00:43:11,800 --> 00:43:14,520
Speaker 1: It's in a little like a nook area with like

1005
00:43:14,600 --> 00:43:16,520
Speaker 1: jewelry and whatnot. But I have my blessing jar, and

1006
00:43:16,560 --> 00:43:19,160
Speaker 1: I think that's great. That's notes coming from other people.

1007
00:43:19,200 --> 00:43:20,880
Speaker 1: I think it was just me documenting at the end

1008
00:43:20,880 --> 00:43:22,759
Speaker 1: of the day, writing it down. But I do get

1009
00:43:22,800 --> 00:43:27,759
Speaker 1: the whole exercise. It's kind of even different. We're gonna

1010
00:43:27,760 --> 00:43:29,920
Speaker 1: have to agree to disagree on this. Listen, I'll do

1011
00:43:30,000 --> 00:43:32,879
Speaker 1: this activity for you, this assignment, or I'll try it.

1012
00:43:32,920 --> 00:43:34,319
Speaker 1: But then this is one of the things. If something

1013
00:43:34,360 --> 00:43:37,080
Speaker 1: happens to me, you burn it. I cannot have someone

1014
00:43:37,120 --> 00:43:38,120
Speaker 1: finding my journal of.

1015
00:43:38,200 --> 00:43:40,040
Speaker 4: Me writing down all the compliments.

1016
00:43:41,560 --> 00:43:44,560
Speaker 2: Can you imagine on it there's like a documentary about

1017
00:43:44,560 --> 00:43:46,319
Speaker 2: your life. And they're like, And when we went through

1018
00:43:46,320 --> 00:43:49,120
Speaker 2: a closet, we found a journal where she wrote every.

1019
00:43:49,080 --> 00:43:53,160
Speaker 3: Compliment anybody ever gave her. Cat said I had beautiful

1020
00:43:53,160 --> 00:43:56,920
Speaker 3: hair today. The other cat told me that I looked

1021
00:43:56,960 --> 00:44:01,279
Speaker 3: good on camera during the Country Croc post, Shannon told me,

1022
00:44:01,719 --> 00:44:02,560
Speaker 3: and that's all it was.

1023
00:44:02,760 --> 00:44:04,399
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, I.

1024
00:44:04,360 --> 00:44:06,440
Speaker 2: Don't think that would be negative. I think people are like,

1025
00:44:06,640 --> 00:44:10,200
Speaker 2: she must have been working on her mental Yeah.

1026
00:44:10,440 --> 00:44:14,000
Speaker 1: Now they're gonna think that for sure, just on this podcast.

1027
00:44:14,400 --> 00:44:16,680
Speaker 1: Then they'll know this is what she was doing. It

1028
00:44:16,719 --> 00:44:18,320
Speaker 1: was an assignment, or maybe I put that at the

1029
00:44:18,360 --> 00:44:21,759
Speaker 1: beginning of the journal. This is an assignment from Kat.

1030
00:44:21,840 --> 00:44:25,319
Speaker 1: I don't want to do this. I hate this. If

1031
00:44:25,360 --> 00:44:31,600
Speaker 1: anybody finds this, this is homework for my mental health, sincerely, Amy.

1032
00:44:31,680 --> 00:44:35,560
Speaker 2: If that gets you to do it, I'm fine, perfect, Yeah, Okay, I.

1033
00:44:35,480 --> 00:44:36,080
Speaker 5: Can get it.

1034
00:44:47,480 --> 00:44:50,720
Speaker 1: Shannon said that keeping birthday cards or notes from family

1035
00:44:50,760 --> 00:44:54,120
Speaker 1: and friends that say something nice, if you keep those around.

1036
00:44:53,800 --> 00:44:56,040
Speaker 2: Then you reread them and.

1037
00:44:56,120 --> 00:44:57,920
Speaker 1: You come across them, and that can be very helpful

1038
00:44:58,000 --> 00:44:59,960
Speaker 1: for Yeah, so it's sort of the same thing as

1039
00:45:00,080 --> 00:45:00,839
Speaker 1: like the blessing jar.

1040
00:45:01,000 --> 00:45:02,640
Speaker 5: But y'all, do you keep your cards?

1041
00:45:03,280 --> 00:45:03,440
Speaker 2: Yeah?

1042
00:45:03,440 --> 00:45:05,680
Speaker 1: I have a shoe box full of some of them, Yeah,

1043
00:45:06,000 --> 00:45:08,520
Speaker 1: like from way of them. Some I don't know what

1044
00:45:08,600 --> 00:45:10,280
Speaker 1: determines when I keep it or when I don't.

1045
00:45:10,320 --> 00:45:11,919
Speaker 2: I wonder if any of my cards are in there.

1046
00:45:12,680 --> 00:45:15,760
Speaker 2: Probably I probably haven't even given you a card. I

1047
00:45:15,800 --> 00:45:17,600
Speaker 2: and notoriously don't put cards in gifts.

1048
00:45:18,160 --> 00:45:19,520
Speaker 4: Yeah. Cat loves cards.

1049
00:45:19,640 --> 00:45:20,600
Speaker 5: I like getting them.

1050
00:45:20,960 --> 00:45:26,040
Speaker 1: The other cry ocat Sometimes I'm like, oh a card. Yeah,

1051
00:45:26,360 --> 00:45:29,840
Speaker 1: y'all need different names. Therapy cat, cryocat, that's what I

1052
00:45:29,880 --> 00:45:30,359
Speaker 1: call y'all.

1053
00:45:30,400 --> 00:45:34,279
Speaker 2: But oh she's okay, ye wait, who calls you Catherine?

1054
00:45:34,560 --> 00:45:35,720
Speaker 4: That's what she calls herself.

1055
00:45:35,760 --> 00:45:38,080
Speaker 5: Sometimes Catherine's a different person.

1056
00:45:38,200 --> 00:45:40,719
Speaker 1: She'll be like, Catherine's tired of this.

1057
00:45:42,480 --> 00:45:45,719
Speaker 2: Patrick calls me Catherine, and I'm like in trouble, but

1058
00:45:46,239 --> 00:45:54,440
Speaker 2: I don't tell us more. Well, the other day, Catherine's

1059
00:45:54,440 --> 00:45:59,040
Speaker 2: been a bad, bad car. What do you call him?

1060
00:45:59,080 --> 00:45:59,719
Speaker 2: Right into the.

1061
00:46:03,560 --> 00:46:05,680
Speaker 5: Would I call him when he's a bad boy?

1062
00:46:07,600 --> 00:46:07,680
Speaker 2: You?

1063
00:46:07,840 --> 00:46:08,120
Speaker 5: Dirty?

1064
00:46:08,160 --> 00:46:09,719
Speaker 2: Dirty Tom? No?

1065
00:46:10,080 --> 00:46:11,760
Speaker 4: Well, his full name he is Patrick.

1066
00:46:12,080 --> 00:46:14,960
Speaker 2: Like if if he was called pat people call him Patty,

1067
00:46:15,080 --> 00:46:16,880
Speaker 2: but I don't.

1068
00:46:16,640 --> 00:46:20,240
Speaker 4: Call him that, Patrick van Buren, Patrick, Thomas Patrick.

1069
00:46:20,520 --> 00:46:22,160
Speaker 2: You know what my mom called me when I got

1070
00:46:22,239 --> 00:46:23,120
Speaker 2: in trouble as a kid.

1071
00:46:23,560 --> 00:46:25,120
Speaker 5: What have I not told you this?

1072
00:46:25,840 --> 00:46:30,759
Speaker 2: Katherine Mary, Elizabeth, Francis, Sally, Brittany, Defada, get your butt down.

1073
00:46:30,920 --> 00:46:32,319
Speaker 4: Why are there so many middle names?

1074
00:46:32,320 --> 00:46:34,640
Speaker 2: She said one day she started adding names when she

1075
00:46:34,680 --> 00:46:36,360
Speaker 2: was mad at me, and that's what she would call me.

1076
00:46:36,680 --> 00:46:37,440
Speaker 2: And I was in trouble.

1077
00:46:38,480 --> 00:46:46,120
Speaker 1: Katherine Mary, Mary, Elizabeth, Elizabeth, Francis, Francis, Sally, Sally, Brittany, Brittany, If.

1078
00:46:46,160 --> 00:46:48,319
Speaker 4: Not as a mom. I can barely get like one

1079
00:46:48,400 --> 00:46:49,240
Speaker 4: kid's name straight.

1080
00:46:49,320 --> 00:46:52,640
Speaker 5: Well, yeah, okay, had a lot. Maybe she'd loved me more.

1081
00:46:52,719 --> 00:46:53,279
Speaker 4: That is a lot.

1082
00:46:53,320 --> 00:46:55,240
Speaker 1: I love that. That's funny. Your mom's funny.

1083
00:46:56,160 --> 00:46:56,359
Speaker 2: Hi.

1084
00:46:56,600 --> 00:47:05,400
Speaker 1: If you're listening, Hi, Kat's Hi, Catherine, Elizabeth, Brittany, Tina Defadas.

1085
00:47:05,440 --> 00:47:07,520
Speaker 2: Now are you adding on? Yeah? I have a question.

1086
00:47:07,640 --> 00:47:10,520
Speaker 2: Actually this is on topic but kind of off. Have

1087
00:47:10,560 --> 00:47:13,239
Speaker 2: you seen that trend on TikTok that goes into like

1088
00:47:13,280 --> 00:47:14,960
Speaker 2: all the different names people call you?

1089
00:47:15,400 --> 00:47:17,279
Speaker 4: Oh no, it is, yes, I've seen great.

1090
00:47:17,400 --> 00:47:19,560
Speaker 2: So I want to know what your like nicknames are, Like,

1091
00:47:19,560 --> 00:47:20,759
Speaker 2: does your sister call you something?

1092
00:47:20,800 --> 00:47:21,600
Speaker 5: She calls you seister?

1093
00:47:22,480 --> 00:47:22,760
Speaker 2: Yeah?

1094
00:47:22,840 --> 00:47:25,360
Speaker 5: Is there another name called bbb? Okay, so what are

1095
00:47:25,400 --> 00:47:25,959
Speaker 5: all your names?

1096
00:47:26,440 --> 00:47:29,080
Speaker 1: We Bb to my sister and her kids, where does

1097
00:47:29,160 --> 00:47:33,040
Speaker 1: that come from? That's my my niece was the first

1098
00:47:33,120 --> 00:47:35,560
Speaker 1: one born, my sister's first kid.

1099
00:47:35,680 --> 00:47:36,200
Speaker 2: And I don't know.

1100
00:47:36,400 --> 00:47:37,400
Speaker 4: Her middle name's Elizabeth.

1101
00:47:37,440 --> 00:47:39,680
Speaker 1: My middle name is Elizabeth, and I think like maybe

1102
00:47:39,760 --> 00:47:42,840
Speaker 1: Christy was trying to do like an Ebby thing or Elizabeth.

1103
00:47:43,480 --> 00:47:45,880
Speaker 4: I don't know, bb came out with her first. I

1104
00:47:45,920 --> 00:47:47,759
Speaker 4: don't know if it's like not quite sure.

1105
00:47:47,840 --> 00:47:49,200
Speaker 5: Okay, So no real story there.

1106
00:47:49,400 --> 00:47:50,640
Speaker 2: Yeah, I love to.

1107
00:47:50,719 --> 00:47:52,480
Speaker 4: Ask, but I think I had something to do with

1108
00:47:52,719 --> 00:47:53,520
Speaker 4: like Elizabeth.

1109
00:47:53,680 --> 00:47:56,880
Speaker 5: Okay, but BB, I love the name Elizabeth.

1110
00:47:57,680 --> 00:48:00,320
Speaker 4: Thanks, is that really one of yours?

1111
00:48:00,440 --> 00:48:03,200
Speaker 2: So? What is your real my certificate?

1112
00:48:03,440 --> 00:48:03,600
Speaker 1: Yeah?

1113
00:48:04,320 --> 00:48:06,000
Speaker 5: Yes, which which of those names are on my?

1114
00:48:06,440 --> 00:48:06,960
Speaker 2: I know what it is?

1115
00:48:07,120 --> 00:48:08,640
Speaker 4: Hold on? I know your middle name?

1116
00:48:09,360 --> 00:48:09,560
Speaker 2: Yeah?

1117
00:48:09,920 --> 00:48:12,520
Speaker 5: No, Mary, Well, Marie wasn't in the names that I

1118
00:48:12,680 --> 00:48:13,200
Speaker 5: just listed.

1119
00:48:15,239 --> 00:48:16,360
Speaker 2: Katherine, Mary.

1120
00:48:16,560 --> 00:48:17,799
Speaker 5: My sister's middle name is Marie.

1121
00:48:17,880 --> 00:48:23,600
Speaker 1: Yeah, you're m A R y Katherine, Marie defauda No, Mary,

1122
00:48:23,800 --> 00:48:24,359
Speaker 1: that's what I meant.

1123
00:48:24,440 --> 00:48:26,920
Speaker 2: Okay, you said Marie. She said Marie, But you just

1124
00:48:26,960 --> 00:48:27,399
Speaker 2: said Marie.

1125
00:48:27,520 --> 00:48:31,040
Speaker 4: I said Mary. But then no, you just said Marie.

1126
00:48:31,280 --> 00:48:33,480
Speaker 2: I know, roll back to the table. I know I did,

1127
00:48:33,600 --> 00:48:37,560
Speaker 2: but I said Mary. Alex saying you're uber and your

1128
00:48:37,920 --> 00:48:40,200
Speaker 2: ubber or whatever he called it uber you.

1129
00:48:41,440 --> 00:48:43,360
Speaker 1: He's like, we need to order a you buber And

1130
00:48:43,440 --> 00:48:44,880
Speaker 1: I was like, you mean uber. He's like, that's what

1131
00:48:45,040 --> 00:48:49,879
Speaker 1: I said, so that I know, but I meant Mary. Well,

1132
00:48:49,960 --> 00:48:54,439
Speaker 1: he met uber, but he said you were. You said okay,

1133
00:48:54,440 --> 00:48:55,200
Speaker 1: any whatever, I want.

1134
00:48:55,200 --> 00:48:55,799
Speaker 5: You know their names.

1135
00:48:56,320 --> 00:48:56,560
Speaker 2: BB.

1136
00:48:57,160 --> 00:48:58,920
Speaker 4: My pastor calls me Ames.

1137
00:48:59,360 --> 00:49:01,600
Speaker 5: That's cute. What if you made the real and you're

1138
00:49:01,640 --> 00:49:03,160
Speaker 5: like Aimes to my pastor.

1139
00:49:03,880 --> 00:49:04,640
Speaker 2: I'm trying to think of.

1140
00:49:04,680 --> 00:49:07,000
Speaker 4: Like anybody that call it, But some people call me.

1141
00:49:07,680 --> 00:49:10,520
Speaker 4: My boyfriend's son calls me amster.

1142
00:49:11,560 --> 00:49:14,600
Speaker 5: Cute the twelve year old that's cute.

1143
00:49:14,640 --> 00:49:16,320
Speaker 4: Yeah, I'd be like, uh, amster.

1144
00:49:16,880 --> 00:49:19,399
Speaker 5: I feel like that's something that like a dad would

1145
00:49:19,480 --> 00:49:22,560
Speaker 5: call you two, like, hey, amster, how you doing?

1146
00:49:22,719 --> 00:49:26,359
Speaker 4: Growing up? My neighbor, my neighbor was Jill.

1147
00:49:26,440 --> 00:49:29,759
Speaker 1: Her mom was Susan. Our moms were friends, and she

1148
00:49:29,840 --> 00:49:33,640
Speaker 1: always called me famous amos. And I saw her when

1149
00:49:33,680 --> 00:49:35,960
Speaker 1: my cousin's mom passed away a couple of years ago.

1150
00:49:36,040 --> 00:49:37,840
Speaker 1: That's the last time I saw her was at that funeral,

1151
00:49:37,920 --> 00:49:40,160
Speaker 1: and she's still she's like, famous Amos.

1152
00:49:40,560 --> 00:49:43,440
Speaker 4: How's it going? Because you know there's this famous amous cookies.

1153
00:49:43,560 --> 00:49:44,239
Speaker 5: Yes, they're so good.

1154
00:49:44,840 --> 00:49:45,040
Speaker 2: Yeah.

1155
00:49:45,640 --> 00:49:46,759
Speaker 4: So I'm trying to think that I don't know that

1156
00:49:46,800 --> 00:49:47,840
Speaker 4: I have any other nicknames.

1157
00:49:48,160 --> 00:49:49,120
Speaker 2: That's enough. That's a lot.

1158
00:49:49,520 --> 00:49:51,120
Speaker 5: You can make one of those reels. See if he

1159
00:49:51,160 --> 00:49:51,640
Speaker 5: goes viral.

1160
00:49:51,840 --> 00:49:57,400
Speaker 2: Who don't really? My pastor amos to my mom's friends, cousins, sisters,

1161
00:49:57,480 --> 00:50:00,799
Speaker 2: my neighbor, neighbor, she was ready ever growing up Because

1162
00:50:00,800 --> 00:50:02,440
Speaker 2: I'm like, yeah, I don't know that I am like

1163
00:50:02,560 --> 00:50:04,640
Speaker 2: what your friends in high school called you. Amy.

1164
00:50:05,400 --> 00:50:07,600
Speaker 5: You have a short name, so I think it's harder

1165
00:50:07,640 --> 00:50:09,239
Speaker 5: to have a nickname for a short name.

1166
00:50:11,680 --> 00:50:13,080
Speaker 4: Amsy amsy.

1167
00:50:14,239 --> 00:50:15,439
Speaker 5: Ams is her name.

1168
00:50:17,120 --> 00:50:18,520
Speaker 4: To cry okat, I am princess.

1169
00:50:19,360 --> 00:50:21,520
Speaker 5: Wait, funny reel If you did it.

1170
00:50:24,160 --> 00:50:26,040
Speaker 2: So frantic, I know, but that would kind of be

1171
00:50:26,120 --> 00:50:28,200
Speaker 2: like what you called when you're making like a spoof

1172
00:50:28,239 --> 00:50:31,759
Speaker 2: of something to satire, it would make satire. Aims to

1173
00:50:31,840 --> 00:50:34,600
Speaker 2: my pastor, as I know.

1174
00:50:34,800 --> 00:50:36,280
Speaker 4: To my kids, I'm mom.

1175
00:50:42,680 --> 00:50:45,600
Speaker 5: What it is, But you have to make this reel? Now,

1176
00:50:45,680 --> 00:50:48,120
Speaker 5: this is funny. So how would I do it? I

1177
00:50:48,160 --> 00:50:51,120
Speaker 5: would say, from Amy to the government.

1178
00:50:51,719 --> 00:50:55,719
Speaker 1: Okay, so the government. I'm Amy to my kids, I

1179
00:50:55,800 --> 00:50:59,760
Speaker 1: am Mom to my sister and her kids. I'm Beattie

1180
00:51:00,320 --> 00:51:02,200
Speaker 1: to my pastor. I'm Aims.

1181
00:51:04,680 --> 00:51:06,000
Speaker 4: To my neighbor growing up.

1182
00:51:06,160 --> 00:51:14,400
Speaker 2: I just to my friend Cat, I am princess. I

1183
00:51:14,480 --> 00:51:16,640
Speaker 2: think it's funny you put it on TikTok because TikTok

1184
00:51:16,680 --> 00:51:17,640
Speaker 2: you can do whatever you want there.

1185
00:51:17,719 --> 00:51:20,600
Speaker 5: It's like posting stuff. Nobody cares. I think it's funny.

1186
00:51:20,960 --> 00:51:22,960
Speaker 4: Actually did it on TikTok because our feeling things is

1187
00:51:23,000 --> 00:51:23,480
Speaker 4: on TikTok.

1188
00:51:23,480 --> 00:51:25,640
Speaker 2: Okay okay, okay, what are yours?

1189
00:51:26,040 --> 00:51:26,480
Speaker 5: Mine aren't?

1190
00:51:26,560 --> 00:51:29,200
Speaker 2: Is good? I, well, it's debatable.

1191
00:51:30,160 --> 00:51:31,319
Speaker 4: They probably are better.

1192
00:51:31,640 --> 00:51:38,440
Speaker 2: So Catherine to some of my family, Cat to my

1193
00:51:39,239 --> 00:51:45,759
Speaker 2: other some of my family and friends after college Cat

1194
00:51:46,880 --> 00:51:51,720
Speaker 2: Catherine to Little Jesus to friends from college fraternity parties.

1195
00:51:53,280 --> 00:51:54,120
Speaker 2: Little that was my.

1196
00:51:54,160 --> 00:51:54,960
Speaker 5: Nickname in college.

1197
00:51:55,080 --> 00:51:57,000
Speaker 2: They called me Kitty Cat, and then they called me

1198
00:51:57,480 --> 00:52:00,319
Speaker 2: Little Jesus, and then it went to LJ. I that's

1199
00:52:00,360 --> 00:52:02,680
Speaker 2: what people like afratornity parties would call me. Well J.

1200
00:52:03,480 --> 00:52:05,960
Speaker 2: I was very religious my freshman year of college, and

1201
00:52:06,040 --> 00:52:08,560
Speaker 2: I was like the chaplain of our sorority. I was

1202
00:52:08,600 --> 00:52:12,040
Speaker 2: like very into Little Jesus. So I was like, why

1203
00:52:12,080 --> 00:52:13,520
Speaker 2: did none of the guys ever try to take me

1204
00:52:13,640 --> 00:52:14,480
Speaker 2: home freshman year?

1205
00:52:14,560 --> 00:52:15,239
Speaker 5: Probably because I.

1206
00:52:15,239 --> 00:52:16,520
Speaker 2: Would be called Little Jesus.

1207
00:52:17,680 --> 00:52:21,080
Speaker 4: Oh, I don't want to think about reason my freshman

1208
00:52:21,480 --> 00:52:22,920
Speaker 4: child being taken home.

1209
00:52:23,080 --> 00:52:24,799
Speaker 2: Well, I didn't mean it like that, Like why didn't

1210
00:52:24,960 --> 00:52:28,600
Speaker 2: the guys, why weren't they buying me drinks? Mean it

1211
00:52:28,680 --> 00:52:30,160
Speaker 2: that way? You just said it that way?

1212
00:52:32,760 --> 00:52:36,120
Speaker 4: Got a liar rolled the tape.

1213
00:52:36,640 --> 00:52:41,720
Speaker 2: Liar like I got it on tail. Okay, I wouldn't

1214
00:52:41,719 --> 00:52:43,920
Speaker 2: have probably gone home with them, but I wanted to

1215
00:52:43,960 --> 00:52:48,520
Speaker 2: be invited. Yeah, like we just want to get asked,

1216
00:52:49,080 --> 00:52:51,920
Speaker 2: want to try to? No, I don't. Okay, moving on

1217
00:52:52,600 --> 00:52:55,040
Speaker 2: LJ and the Kitty Cat and.

1218
00:52:56,840 --> 00:52:58,520
Speaker 4: Years are better then.

1219
00:52:58,960 --> 00:53:01,080
Speaker 2: Some of my friends call me cat, but like as

1220
00:53:01,080 --> 00:53:04,640
Speaker 2: a joke, the guys from high school called me Kath.

1221
00:53:05,480 --> 00:53:08,040
Speaker 4: Which well I just thought it one from grade school?

1222
00:53:08,239 --> 00:53:11,120
Speaker 4: What was it, motormouth Moffitt, that.

1223
00:53:12,840 --> 00:53:13,480
Speaker 5: Has to go on there.

1224
00:53:13,600 --> 00:53:15,600
Speaker 2: Yeah, it was my maiden name.

1225
00:53:15,640 --> 00:53:18,120
Speaker 4: And that's also remember because don't you remember when I

1226
00:53:18,200 --> 00:53:19,279
Speaker 4: ran for treasure in fourth grade?

1227
00:53:21,160 --> 00:53:23,320
Speaker 2: I wasn't there, so I don't remember.

1228
00:53:24,360 --> 00:53:25,600
Speaker 4: I know, but I've told you this story.

1229
00:53:25,719 --> 00:53:27,560
Speaker 5: I don't remember. I'm just kidding, Okay.

1230
00:53:27,840 --> 00:53:30,399
Speaker 1: Obviously we've experienced a lot of life together at this point,

1231
00:53:30,520 --> 00:53:32,880
Speaker 1: or a lot of stories, so like we can't remember everything.

1232
00:53:33,040 --> 00:53:36,200
Speaker 5: Yeah, thanks for that. Do you want to share this?

1233
00:53:36,280 --> 00:53:36,440
Speaker 2: Yeah?

1234
00:53:36,440 --> 00:53:39,319
Speaker 4: I ran for treasure. I didn't make it, Thank god.

1235
00:53:40,280 --> 00:53:41,840
Speaker 4: Money would have you.

1236
00:53:41,840 --> 00:53:44,560
Speaker 2: Would the name machines would be free. Is that what

1237
00:53:44,680 --> 00:53:45,080
Speaker 2: you said?

1238
00:53:47,400 --> 00:53:49,560
Speaker 4: Vote for Amy Moffatt? You can't top it? And I

1239
00:53:49,640 --> 00:53:50,960
Speaker 4: had dollar bills all over it.

1240
00:53:51,200 --> 00:53:51,680
Speaker 5: Oh cute.

1241
00:53:52,320 --> 00:53:57,720
Speaker 2: They didn't vote mine for me. My nickname in middle

1242
00:53:57,760 --> 00:54:01,560
Speaker 2: school was Catherine A lotta defada, So when they did,

1243
00:54:01,640 --> 00:54:03,520
Speaker 2: like the morning announcements and read like the stats from

1244
00:54:03,560 --> 00:54:06,520
Speaker 2: like the soccer games, same like and four stops from

1245
00:54:06,600 --> 00:54:09,200
Speaker 2: Katherine a lotta Defada because you were stopping the ball

1246
00:54:09,239 --> 00:54:13,040
Speaker 2: Alata a lotta And my last name was Defada. I

1247
00:54:13,520 --> 00:54:17,400
Speaker 2: aunt Kat to my nieces and nephews. I don't have

1248
00:54:17,440 --> 00:54:19,040
Speaker 2: any like cool names.

1249
00:54:19,200 --> 00:54:24,680
Speaker 4: I think Little Jesus takes the cakes. L J for sure, LJ. Yeah,

1250
00:54:24,719 --> 00:54:26,759
Speaker 4: all right, well LJ. Where can people find you?

1251
00:54:27,480 --> 00:54:30,920
Speaker 2: Well, they can find me on Instagram at kat van Buren.

1252
00:54:31,080 --> 00:54:33,760
Speaker 2: They can find us on Instagram at Feeling Things podcasts.

1253
00:54:33,840 --> 00:54:36,200
Speaker 1: Yeah, and then I am at Radio Amy And before

1254
00:54:36,280 --> 00:54:39,680
Speaker 1: we close, we're gonna get to our email.

1255
00:54:39,760 --> 00:54:40,480
Speaker 5: It's not your part.

1256
00:54:41,040 --> 00:54:46,319
Speaker 1: Oh sorry, I see I already forgot that. It's ok

1257
00:54:46,400 --> 00:54:49,040
Speaker 1: and you won't mean to remember the question you answered

1258
00:54:49,080 --> 00:54:49,880
Speaker 1: back in January?

1259
00:54:50,600 --> 00:54:51,520
Speaker 5: What question did I ask you?

1260
00:54:51,600 --> 00:54:52,399
Speaker 2: And you said earlier?

1261
00:54:52,520 --> 00:54:53,880
Speaker 1: Mir were like, remember we played that game. Then I

1262
00:54:54,080 --> 00:54:56,359
Speaker 1: met your boyfriend and we asked like tons of questions.

1263
00:54:56,080 --> 00:54:56,680
Speaker 2: And you forgot that.

1264
00:54:57,120 --> 00:55:00,239
Speaker 5: Okay, ready, Okay, So now it's time for the part

1265
00:55:00,280 --> 00:55:01,120
Speaker 5: of the show Monday.

1266
00:55:01,160 --> 00:55:04,320
Speaker 1: Guys, we're gonna get this down. We're still only in

1267
00:55:04,400 --> 00:55:05,319
Speaker 1: our second month.

1268
00:55:05,680 --> 00:55:08,600
Speaker 2: Did you watch Veggie Tails some when I was like,

1269
00:55:08,800 --> 00:55:14,839
Speaker 2: any ing, Oh, you guys watched it right. Well, when

1270
00:55:14,840 --> 00:55:16,600
Speaker 2: I said now it's time of the part of the show,

1271
00:55:17,160 --> 00:55:18,800
Speaker 2: this isn't gonna make any sense to you because in

1272
00:55:18,880 --> 00:55:21,160
Speaker 2: the show it goes and now it's time for silly

1273
00:55:21,239 --> 00:55:23,000
Speaker 2: songs with Larry, the part of the show where Larry

1274
00:55:23,040 --> 00:55:24,840
Speaker 2: sings a silly song, and it sounded the same, you know.

1275
00:55:25,160 --> 00:55:26,920
Speaker 4: Yeah, No, I'm telling you, I did watch it when

1276
00:55:26,960 --> 00:55:29,040
Speaker 4: I nannied kids, so I know what you're talking about.

1277
00:55:29,239 --> 00:55:31,120
Speaker 5: Well, you made it seem like it was loserrous.

1278
00:55:31,120 --> 00:55:33,440
Speaker 4: No, I was making it seem that I'm older than you.

1279
00:55:33,840 --> 00:55:37,080
Speaker 5: Ok Okay, So it's okay, But it was cool that

1280
00:55:37,120 --> 00:55:37,279
Speaker 5: I was.

1281
00:55:37,360 --> 00:55:39,080
Speaker 4: Actually slight dig at my age.

1282
00:55:40,280 --> 00:55:41,480
Speaker 2: Okay. I just want you to tell me it was

1283
00:55:41,520 --> 00:55:43,120
Speaker 2: cool that I watched it. It was cool, Okay.

1284
00:55:43,880 --> 00:55:47,840
Speaker 1: Veggie tales, veggie tales, veggie tales.

1285
00:55:47,760 --> 00:55:48,800
Speaker 2: Veggee tails.

1286
00:55:49,200 --> 00:55:50,000
Speaker 5: See, I know.

1287
00:55:50,680 --> 00:55:51,000
Speaker 2: Sweet.

1288
00:55:51,160 --> 00:55:57,279
Speaker 5: Okay. Now ready, are you ready for the Email of

1289
00:55:57,480 --> 00:55:57,839
Speaker 5: the day?

1290
00:55:58,520 --> 00:55:59,239
Speaker 2: That was really good?

1291
00:55:59,280 --> 00:56:02,160
Speaker 5: Okay, wait, I'm not supposed to say that. You want

1292
00:56:02,200 --> 00:56:04,600
Speaker 5: me to do it again? Yeah, now it's time for

1293
00:56:04,719 --> 00:56:07,920
Speaker 5: the Email of the Day.

1294
00:56:08,840 --> 00:56:12,040
Speaker 1: Hi was listening to your recent podcast and wanted to

1295
00:56:12,120 --> 00:56:14,320
Speaker 1: drop a note saying that I am a male listener

1296
00:56:14,400 --> 00:56:17,960
Speaker 1: in Montana. I have been a longtime Bobby Bone show listener.

1297
00:56:17,680 --> 00:56:19,960
Speaker 4: And love lov in all caps.

1298
00:56:20,520 --> 00:56:24,640
Speaker 1: This new podcast for y'all great content that I can

1299
00:56:24,760 --> 00:56:26,840
Speaker 1: relate to, and I think it's hitting a much needed

1300
00:56:26,880 --> 00:56:29,399
Speaker 1: area of content that is overlooked. Keep up the good

1301
00:56:29,480 --> 00:56:39,040
Speaker 1: work on positive vibes. Pete from Montana wants me to

1302
00:56:39,200 --> 00:56:43,120
Speaker 1: journal Pete things that we're relatable in a much needed

1303
00:56:43,160 --> 00:56:44,319
Speaker 1: area that's overlooked.

1304
00:56:44,400 --> 00:56:45,280
Speaker 4: So thank you, Pete.

1305
00:56:45,800 --> 00:56:47,840
Speaker 1: And we should get a bell for like you know,

1306
00:56:48,440 --> 00:56:50,160
Speaker 1: like every time you know this, an angel gets their

1307
00:56:50,160 --> 00:56:51,719
Speaker 1: wings or whatever, and we get a little bell that's

1308
00:56:51,760 --> 00:56:55,279
Speaker 1: like every male listener we get. We're like, wait, that's

1309
00:56:55,320 --> 00:56:57,000
Speaker 1: a great idea because I think now we have like

1310
00:56:57,320 --> 00:57:00,600
Speaker 1: with Pete's thirteen, No, we're up to it least thirteen.

1311
00:57:01,480 --> 00:57:03,960
Speaker 4: So we're growing with our male listeners.

1312
00:57:04,120 --> 00:57:05,000
Speaker 5: And thanks for the email.

1313
00:57:05,120 --> 00:57:08,040
Speaker 1: And so if every male listener, all thirteen of you,

1314
00:57:08,160 --> 00:57:12,360
Speaker 1: could just pass this episode or any episode the whole

1315
00:57:12,640 --> 00:57:16,440
Speaker 1: podcast to the show, pass it on to your one

1316
00:57:16,520 --> 00:57:18,400
Speaker 1: mail that you know, then we're up to twenty six.

1317
00:57:19,200 --> 00:57:21,360
Speaker 2: Yeah, it can be like a pass it in an

1318
00:57:21,400 --> 00:57:23,720
Speaker 2: email chain and say if you don't forward this to

1319
00:57:23,840 --> 00:57:26,320
Speaker 2: four of your friends, you will die. And if you,

1320
00:57:26,560 --> 00:57:28,560
Speaker 2: if you do pass it to four of your friends,

1321
00:57:28,920 --> 00:57:31,800
Speaker 2: just some dimmer like we'll show up in your right.

1322
00:57:32,000 --> 00:57:34,080
Speaker 4: That's true, sincerely, little Jesus.

1323
00:57:36,160 --> 00:57:42,120
Speaker 5: Right, yes, if Jesus says it, then it must be true. Okay,

1324
00:57:42,200 --> 00:57:42,880
Speaker 5: that's a great idea.

1325
00:57:42,960 --> 00:57:45,720
Speaker 2: Okay, all right, Well have thed you need to have.

1326
00:57:46,040 --> 00:57:46,280
Speaker 1: Bye.

1327
00:57:46,400 --> 00:57:46,600
Speaker 2: Bye,