WEBVTT - Pussy Healing in the Patriarchy

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<v Speaker 1>Once upon a time there was a good old traditional housewife.

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<v Speaker 2>She cooked, she cleaned, cared for her children and the

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<v Speaker 2>man of the house, and of course she didn't talk back.

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<v Speaker 1>She was both obedient and soft by nature. She was

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<v Speaker 1>a good woman who always made good choices. We're good

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<v Speaker 1>mom's bad choices.

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<v Speaker 2>Whose single mom?

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<v Speaker 1>Who said? But the patriarchy shared all.

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<v Speaker 2>Their bad choices and found out they were so bad

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<v Speaker 2>after all. We're experts overhairs and your new besties.

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<v Speaker 1>Sit back and hear the ride I can do. I

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<v Speaker 1>welcome back to good Mom's bad choices. I'm Erica and

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<v Speaker 1>I'm Mila. Happy hump Day, which is happy.

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<v Speaker 2>Good Mom's Day, which is also hump day because we'd

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<v Speaker 2>be humping' that's whatever. Mom's welcome to our shaw. We're

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<v Speaker 2>the moms that'd be humping.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm not doing any humping. I'm solibate again.

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<v Speaker 2>Okay, are you celibate until further notice? Or you just celibate?

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<v Speaker 2>I mean, I guess what do you mean?

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<v Speaker 1>What like, I'm never having sex ever?

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<v Speaker 2>In cell?

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<v Speaker 1>Celibate? You know what in cell means? Well, that's not noting.

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<v Speaker 1>They call the niggas that don't get no pussy, but

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<v Speaker 1>you know what it means, though, I don't want to

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<v Speaker 1>be nothing about what. I don't want to no, inel nothing.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm just saying that because I don't think a lot

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<v Speaker 2>of people realize, but in cell means because I didn't

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<v Speaker 2>realize in cell means involuntarily celibate.

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<v Speaker 1>Nothing about how I look is involuntarily celibated.

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<v Speaker 2>Well, if you, I'm okay, I'm saying, are you just

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<v Speaker 2>selivent because they are few and far between?

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<v Speaker 1>Are you celibate because you just don't want have sex

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<v Speaker 1>until everywhere? I just don't want any of them.

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<v Speaker 2>You know, there are niggas everywhere, and they have penises

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<v Speaker 2>and they're available, But do we want those penises in

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<v Speaker 2>our vaginas? No, the eligible penises are few and far between.

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<v Speaker 2>You know what I realized about the in cels and

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<v Speaker 2>the voluntary sellibants and the women and the men and

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<v Speaker 2>the men in the comments because the comments are crazy.

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<v Speaker 2>I realized that the men don't even realize that bitches

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<v Speaker 2>are not even fucking with them anymore because they're in cells.

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<v Speaker 2>They don't like they were never eligible anyway. And like

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<v Speaker 2>everybody's always talking about the birth rate dropping, and I'm like, duh,

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<v Speaker 2>because nobody was up sex with.

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<v Speaker 1>You because you're disgusting.

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<v Speaker 2>I realized if I didn't have Orlando, I definitely would

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<v Speaker 2>find a way back to lesbianism because.

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<v Speaker 1>They're so underwhelming.

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<v Speaker 2>And if you're a man listening to this and you're offended,

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<v Speaker 2>then you need to wake the fuck up, because you know,

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<v Speaker 2>nine out of ten of your homeboys are not fuckable.

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<v Speaker 1>Maybe I don't know if men are looking at their

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<v Speaker 1>men and no men, oh okay, maybe not what bro,

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<v Speaker 1>You're not fuckable?

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<v Speaker 2>Maybe not fuckable, But you know, if you're one smart

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<v Speaker 2>man in a group of ten, you know if your

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<v Speaker 2>homeboy is the homeboy that repels all the women.

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<v Speaker 1>You know, if your homeboy says some shit.

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<v Speaker 2>And you're like, likes, but you don't have to deal

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<v Speaker 2>with it as a fucking romantic partner, so you just

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<v Speaker 2>accept it. Niggas who act like you don't know what

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<v Speaker 2>we're talking about when we choose the bear, stop acting

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<v Speaker 2>like you don't know what we're talking about when we

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<v Speaker 2>choose the bear. And that's my issue is like men

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<v Speaker 2>is like, oh you hate men? No, nigga, do you

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<v Speaker 2>see the era of men right now? They're raping and

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<v Speaker 2>poisoning and being weird, so like, don't be surprised when

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<v Speaker 2>there's no more kids in the world because bitches are like,

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<v Speaker 2>we're good.

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<v Speaker 1>I agree. I do have to say I think that

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<v Speaker 1>the era of men has been this way for a

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<v Speaker 1>very long time. But I will say that I think

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<v Speaker 1>there is a there's more men than in the past

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<v Speaker 1>actually trying to be better, mostly because of the Internet

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<v Speaker 1>and mostly because of access to seeing other men leading

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<v Speaker 1>the way of like being more vulnerable, being more loving

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<v Speaker 1>to themselves, being more loving to women. I don't want

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<v Speaker 1>to say like I think that this has been the

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<v Speaker 1>era for I think we're living in an era of

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<v Speaker 1>generally like what it has been. It's just now people

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<v Speaker 1>have cell phones and keyboards and we're starting to see

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<v Speaker 1>people's opinions. This fucking earring, I swear to I saw

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<v Speaker 1>that use a little cushion. I used a beauty blender.

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<v Speaker 1>I used the tip of a beauty blender to try

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<v Speaker 1>to fuck it and secure this earring in my ear.

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<v Speaker 1>And now it doesn't want to stay. I'm taking it out.

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<v Speaker 2>I would say yes, and I do think the Internet

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<v Speaker 2>and social media has been no not highlighted, increasingly made

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<v Speaker 2>men worse because they don't have to go outside and play.

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<v Speaker 2>They don't have to go and touch grass. And there's

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<v Speaker 2>porn and there has unlimited access to pussy but not pussy.

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<v Speaker 2>So the like the less access to real pussy and

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<v Speaker 2>real interactions with women and like real rejection that you

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<v Speaker 2>have to like build the the like the tenacity to

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<v Speaker 2>keep going has like depleted.

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<v Speaker 1>It's gone.

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<v Speaker 2>So now they just hate women and they're in but

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<v Speaker 2>they like love port.

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<v Speaker 1>It's I don't know, I hate it's always been. I

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<v Speaker 1>just think it's that they have language. It's like they

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<v Speaker 1>have language for their hate. Now. I don't think the

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<v Speaker 1>uneducated ones they just see memes and then they see

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<v Speaker 1>people talk and then they say that's what I meant.

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<v Speaker 2>But listen to the music the men have, like the

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<v Speaker 2>music even hates women more. It's like it progressively, Like

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<v Speaker 2>I don't think like I think the patriarchy. I was

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<v Speaker 2>thinking about this last night. I have do thoughts at night.

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<v Speaker 2>I feel like the patriarchy is at a place where

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<v Speaker 2>they thought that being patriarchal was going to like put

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<v Speaker 2>them at the top. But now we're seeing that the

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<v Speaker 2>patriarchy is now harming them and they don't even realize it.

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<v Speaker 2>But they have been so like they've been so oh no,

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<v Speaker 2>stop calling me. They have been so suppressed, like they're patriarchy.

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<v Speaker 2>They thought they're going to be at the top, but

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<v Speaker 2>they're like, all you can do is provide and protect,

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<v Speaker 2>don't show a lot of emotions. Don't do this. I

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<v Speaker 2>saw this clip. Somebody think of this. I saw this

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<v Speaker 2>clip of Funky Diva. Funky Diva. You know, I don't know.

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<v Speaker 2>You know what I'm talking about. Funk Cameron. No, is

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<v Speaker 2>that Cam Newton? No, not him, not Funky Diva. He's

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<v Speaker 2>a gay guy. Hold on, let me show you. And

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<v Speaker 2>what he said was and this was really telling to me.

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<v Speaker 2>He said that he feels like he's a gay man.

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<v Speaker 2>He feels like straight man are jealous of gay black men.

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<v Speaker 2>Straight black men are jealous of gay black men because

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<v Speaker 2>they see gay black men be able to show up

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<v Speaker 2>in bright colors and expressive and showing themselves and being this.

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<v Speaker 2>He's like, I would never want to be a straight

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<v Speaker 2>man because they got so many rules. They can't eat bananas,

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<v Speaker 2>they can't do this, they can't do this. And I

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<v Speaker 2>was like, damn, that's true. Like imagine existence as a man,

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<v Speaker 2>especially as a black man. He said there's like, no

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<v Speaker 2>other group of people has as many rules and regulations

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<v Speaker 2>as black men. And that's true, and it's like a

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<v Speaker 2>lot of it has been self imposed, but also imposed

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<v Speaker 2>in a way that we didn't realize. It's the system

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<v Speaker 2>imposing it on us. So now they think everything's fucking gay.

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<v Speaker 2>Everything's gay, like you said, eating a banana and no

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<v Speaker 2>homo this, whatever, this, And it's like, if you create

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<v Speaker 2>a world where you can only exist in two colors,

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<v Speaker 2>gray and fucking black, then you dim your own light

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<v Speaker 2>and you suppress your own feelings. And now we're seeing

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<v Speaker 2>a world where that suppression is like like backfiring on them.

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<v Speaker 2>So now they're angry, they're sad, they're frustrated, and they

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<v Speaker 2>don't have words for it because they've told themselves that

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<v Speaker 2>they can only show up in these ways. And now

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<v Speaker 2>the women are growing, We're like, fuck y'all, we don't

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<v Speaker 2>really need y'all. We have a rose, we have our homegirls,

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<v Speaker 2>we have a career, we have education, and they're feeling

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<v Speaker 2>left behind without the language to say I'm sad.

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<v Speaker 1>I don't know why.

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<v Speaker 2>I've been sad for twenty years, but I haven't been

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<v Speaker 2>able to say it. And now like we're seeing the

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<v Speaker 2>result of a deep patriarchal suppression of expression and now

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<v Speaker 2>everybody is being fucked from it, including the United States.

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<v Speaker 2>So when he said that, I was like, wow, I

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<v Speaker 2>can't imagine a place where I had to suppress everything

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<v Speaker 2>about myself, every imagination, Like it's like really suppressing the imagination.

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<v Speaker 2>Can't wear this color, you can't do this, You can't

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<v Speaker 2>do that, and then expecting people to love and respect

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<v Speaker 2>me when I don't even understand my own feelings. So, yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>I agree with Funky Deneva or whatever his name is.

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<v Speaker 1>I agree too. I agree, And you know, unfortunately, you

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<v Speaker 1>know a lot of that has to do with not

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<v Speaker 1>it is the patriarchy, but it's whiteness. It's yeah, it's

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<v Speaker 1>avery's slavery, and it's all of it. And that's why

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<v Speaker 1>it's like I try as much as I know, like

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<v Speaker 1>like a lot of these men are not I don't

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<v Speaker 1>want to say they're not worth shit, because there's always

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<v Speaker 1>the opportunity to change your perspective, but a lot of

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<v Speaker 1>it is like the is guy, I don't know who

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<v Speaker 1>that is. You've never seen that guy. I think we're

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<v Speaker 1>on a different algorithm. You're on the other side of

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<v Speaker 1>the algorithms.

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<v Speaker 2>He's just a black like social hostess. He's been around

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<v Speaker 2>for a long time.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, Anyway, I just hope. I hope for freedom in

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<v Speaker 1>this in this month of Juneteenth, in this week of Juneteenth,

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<v Speaker 1>I hope for freedom for black men in all, in

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<v Speaker 1>all regards, whether you love men, whether you love women,

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<v Speaker 1>I hope freedom for all of you. Because our freedom,

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<v Speaker 1>our joy, is an active rebellion, and allowing women to

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<v Speaker 1>be free generally benefits you.

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<v Speaker 2>But that's what I realized that they're seeing, like especially us,

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<v Speaker 2>they see women be free and speak their mind and

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<v Speaker 2>be sexual and be sentual, and it repulses them because

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<v Speaker 2>they're projecting because they are not able to show up.

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<v Speaker 2>They're only able to show up in one way.

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<v Speaker 1>Well, and also because they never saw their mother show

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<v Speaker 1>up that way, so you know, they whatever they saw

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<v Speaker 1>in their own household, they deem as respectable, they deem

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<v Speaker 1>as that's how it's supposed to be, and so it's

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<v Speaker 1>just perpetuated over and over and over and over again.

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<v Speaker 1>So it's sad.

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<v Speaker 2>It is sad, and I do think they're hating on

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<v Speaker 2>us and they're mad at us because they don't realize

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<v Speaker 2>it's because we show up it in like a versatile

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<v Speaker 2>expressive way. I was also I saw this other girl.

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<v Speaker 2>I don't know if you've heard of her something k media.

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<v Speaker 2>She's like a singles expert or something. I don't know

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<v Speaker 2>how either, but someone she's like a singles expert. She's

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<v Speaker 2>like a million followers by a black lady, and she

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<v Speaker 2>was commenting on Daphne's thing, like, oh, I saw the

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<v Speaker 2>like the lingerie sexiness that she was posting before, and

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<v Speaker 2>she's like I used to know her, and I I think,

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<v Speaker 2>like I had to unfollow her because showing up this

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<v Speaker 2>way like this is how you're gonna get ditties, this

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<v Speaker 2>is how you're gonna get like this, and this is

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<v Speaker 2>how you gonna be like this, like like an OnlyFans person,

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<v Speaker 2>you're not gonna be respected or you're not gonna find

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<v Speaker 2>a man.

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<v Speaker 1>And I just.

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<v Speaker 2>Realized, like the respectability politics around women is also very

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<v Speaker 2>like pigeonholding, because like, since when do women see another

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<v Speaker 2>woman showing up because they look sexy and wearing a

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<v Speaker 2>little clothes and wearing lingerie. I mean, like the Internet

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<v Speaker 2>is a new error, so it's like is it for attention?

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<v Speaker 1>Is it for them? We'll never know. But who gives

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<v Speaker 1>a fuck.

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<v Speaker 2>Why are we judging another woman based on what the

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<v Speaker 2>fuck she's wearing or if she's not only fans or

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<v Speaker 2>if she is sucking dick.

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<v Speaker 1>That's her fucking prerogative. But I just.

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<v Speaker 2>Realized, like, as black people, there are so many rules

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<v Speaker 2>about how we're supposed to show up and what is

0:10:49.840 --> 0:10:51.959
<v Speaker 2>respectable and what is not. And I'm just like, I'm

0:10:52.000 --> 0:10:56.200
<v Speaker 2>tired of it. Let bitches live, let niggas live, live,

0:10:56.240 --> 0:11:02.200
<v Speaker 2>and let live. I agree, it makes me really sad.

0:11:03.880 --> 0:11:06.160
<v Speaker 1>Well, no, I mean it should make you happy, because

0:11:06.200 --> 0:11:08.360
<v Speaker 1>all you can do really is focus on your life

0:11:08.400 --> 0:11:10.560
<v Speaker 1>and what you're doing and our lives and what we

0:11:10.600 --> 0:11:15.839
<v Speaker 1>do perpetuate this idea that and allow other women and

0:11:16.200 --> 0:11:18.200
<v Speaker 1>maybe even men to have permission to do the same,

0:11:18.360 --> 0:11:19.679
<v Speaker 1>you know. I think that's why the work that we

0:11:19.720 --> 0:11:21.679
<v Speaker 1>do is really important. I think that's why the community

0:11:21.679 --> 0:11:25.520
<v Speaker 1>that we have is important, because there's a robust community

0:11:25.520 --> 0:11:29.160
<v Speaker 1>that we have of women that are actively either already

0:11:29.160 --> 0:11:31.920
<v Speaker 1>embodying it or trying to, you know, and that's how

0:11:31.960 --> 0:11:34.160
<v Speaker 1>the healing starts. But it does take I mean, there's

0:11:34.200 --> 0:11:35.839
<v Speaker 1>a lot of work to do. There's a lot and

0:11:35.880 --> 0:11:37.920
<v Speaker 1>whenever I do see those comments like even under like

0:11:38.080 --> 0:11:40.240
<v Speaker 1>you know, the comments that we had around this whole

0:11:40.280 --> 0:11:43.120
<v Speaker 1>Sarah font and not thing, and and the women in

0:11:43.160 --> 0:11:45.360
<v Speaker 1>the comments too, and the men in the comments too,

0:11:45.400 --> 0:11:49.000
<v Speaker 1>and it's like, you, really, I think I'm so much

0:11:49.000 --> 0:11:54.400
<v Speaker 1>sometimes in a bubble that that really exposes what the

0:11:54.480 --> 0:11:58.440
<v Speaker 1>mindset of generally most people are and where most people

0:11:58.480 --> 0:12:00.720
<v Speaker 1>are like reside in their lives.

0:12:00.800 --> 0:12:02.520
<v Speaker 2>I realized that I'm like, oh, the majority of people

0:12:02.520 --> 0:12:03.080
<v Speaker 2>are slow.

0:12:04.800 --> 0:12:08.480
<v Speaker 1>Well, it's like, it's not even that they're slow. I didn't, Well,

0:12:08.520 --> 0:12:10.440
<v Speaker 1>I guess I.

0:12:11.960 --> 0:12:14.400
<v Speaker 2>Realized that like what we think is common sense, the

0:12:14.440 --> 0:12:17.479
<v Speaker 2>way in which we think, like in a full spectrum

0:12:17.559 --> 0:12:19.679
<v Speaker 2>of like just like I don't know what I think

0:12:19.720 --> 0:12:22.040
<v Speaker 2>is common sense or step out of the box of

0:12:22.120 --> 0:12:25.200
<v Speaker 2>like what is allowed. I realized that most people do

0:12:25.280 --> 0:12:29.040
<v Speaker 2>not question the rules that are placed upon us. They

0:12:29.120 --> 0:12:30.200
<v Speaker 2>just exist within them.

0:12:30.600 --> 0:12:32.320
<v Speaker 1>No, they know. I was having this conversation with my

0:12:32.400 --> 0:12:34.760
<v Speaker 1>dad the other day last night, actually, and my dad

0:12:34.840 --> 0:12:37.320
<v Speaker 1>was pissing me the fuck off because some of his

0:12:37.679 --> 0:12:39.839
<v Speaker 1>your parents are just pissing you off yesterday left and right.

0:12:40.720 --> 0:12:42.400
<v Speaker 1>I thought maybe I needed to go to dinner with them,

0:12:42.440 --> 0:12:44.000
<v Speaker 1>and I was going to make me feel. And then

0:12:44.000 --> 0:12:47.679
<v Speaker 1>I was just like, I was like, I've waited all

0:12:47.679 --> 0:12:49.240
<v Speaker 1>my life to have dinner with my mom and dad

0:12:49.280 --> 0:12:50.760
<v Speaker 1>and here I am, what do you think happened? You

0:12:50.760 --> 0:12:55.400
<v Speaker 1>get annoyed? He was just I don't know, he was

0:12:55.760 --> 0:12:57.360
<v Speaker 1>I don't know what was he saying. He was talking

0:12:57.400 --> 0:13:00.360
<v Speaker 1>about how like this is just the rules. Rules are

0:13:00.400 --> 0:13:02.320
<v Speaker 1>the rules. And I was like, Dad, like, what the

0:13:02.320 --> 0:13:04.480
<v Speaker 1>fuck are you talking about? I was like, the rules

0:13:04.600 --> 0:13:06.480
<v Speaker 1>are made out? Who made them?

0:13:06.600 --> 0:13:06.920
<v Speaker 2>Dad?

0:13:07.559 --> 0:13:09.920
<v Speaker 1>What rules was he? What was he talking about? Specifically?

0:13:10.040 --> 0:13:12.880
<v Speaker 1>What rules? He was he was talking about politics again.

0:13:13.320 --> 0:13:16.120
<v Speaker 1>So politics, because you know, this week is you know,

0:13:16.200 --> 0:13:18.280
<v Speaker 1>voto a week, and it was the first time he

0:13:18.320 --> 0:13:21.480
<v Speaker 1>ever voted ever in his whole life. It's felt serious

0:13:21.480 --> 0:13:26.560
<v Speaker 1>this year. And he was really mad because because he

0:13:26.600 --> 0:13:32.240
<v Speaker 1>lives in Calabasas, it's considered a different it's it's La County.

0:13:32.640 --> 0:13:36.440
<v Speaker 1>But like, you can't vote for it's not the same mayor.

0:13:36.480 --> 0:13:38.599
<v Speaker 1>You vote for the mayor of Calabasas, you don't know

0:13:39.080 --> 0:13:42.679
<v Speaker 1>for the mayor of Los Angeles. So I was like,

0:13:42.720 --> 0:13:44.520
<v Speaker 1>my dad. My mom was trying to guess who he

0:13:44.600 --> 0:13:46.319
<v Speaker 1>voted for, and she was like, I don't think that

0:13:46.360 --> 0:13:48.600
<v Speaker 1>you would vote for Spencer Pratt. And he was like,

0:13:48.720 --> 0:13:50.840
<v Speaker 1>Spencer Pratt wasn't even on the ballot, but if he

0:13:50.880 --> 0:13:52.319
<v Speaker 1>was on the ballot, I would have voted for him.

0:13:52.360 --> 0:13:55.520
<v Speaker 2>I was like, what, I'm done. I don't want to

0:13:55.520 --> 0:13:58.880
<v Speaker 2>hear anything else. He said, well then he what, yeah,

0:13:59.080 --> 0:14:00.760
<v Speaker 2>shit the fuck up? He said, he want to call

0:14:00.800 --> 0:14:01.440
<v Speaker 2>your dad after this.

0:14:01.559 --> 0:14:03.959
<v Speaker 1>He said he would have voted for him because because

0:14:04.040 --> 0:14:06.960
<v Speaker 1>what because Karen Bass, because my dad was deeply impacted

0:14:06.960 --> 0:14:07.280
<v Speaker 1>by the.

0:14:07.200 --> 0:14:09.560
<v Speaker 2>Fires, because she forgot to fill up the water. I know,

0:14:09.640 --> 0:14:11.319
<v Speaker 2>but there's a hell of other people on the on

0:14:11.360 --> 0:14:13.200
<v Speaker 2>the ballot other than Karen and him.

0:14:13.760 --> 0:14:16.960
<v Speaker 1>Well, he couldn't vote, didn't he didn't have vote for

0:14:17.000 --> 0:14:21.320
<v Speaker 1>him anyway, but I'm very glad. I was just like Dad, like,

0:14:21.560 --> 0:14:23.400
<v Speaker 1>do you take everything at face value?

0:14:23.760 --> 0:14:27.600
<v Speaker 2>Like now that like all the fucking Laguna Beach, fucking

0:14:27.720 --> 0:14:28.840
<v Speaker 2>white fuck star.

0:14:29.160 --> 0:14:31.720
<v Speaker 1>Well, I'm just saying, like every like, just do you

0:14:31.760 --> 0:14:34.960
<v Speaker 1>take everything at face value? Because listen, I'm I'm not

0:14:35.080 --> 0:14:38.320
<v Speaker 1>that entrenched in politics, and I don't know Karen Bass's

0:14:38.360 --> 0:14:40.960
<v Speaker 1>history and all these things. But when she was voted in,

0:14:41.040 --> 0:14:42.720
<v Speaker 1>like it was like this big deal, like people were

0:14:42.800 --> 0:14:45.640
<v Speaker 1>rallying behind her all that she had done and messed

0:14:45.680 --> 0:14:47.520
<v Speaker 1>up one, and then she messed up. She went on vacation,

0:14:48.040 --> 0:14:50.760
<v Speaker 1>and you know who knows what happened. They're telling her,

0:14:50.760 --> 0:14:52.880
<v Speaker 1>probably we got it under control. It's fine, it's not

0:14:52.920 --> 0:14:54.560
<v Speaker 1>as bad as you think. It's not. It's never all

0:14:54.600 --> 0:14:57.120
<v Speaker 1>in that year, she had cut funding to the fire department,

0:14:57.520 --> 0:15:00.880
<v Speaker 1>probably because someone, someone advised her, advised her to do.

0:15:01.000 --> 0:15:04.119
<v Speaker 1>And I'm just saying, don't you ever question who is advising,

0:15:04.240 --> 0:15:06.640
<v Speaker 1>who's the person advising as a team is a board,

0:15:06.680 --> 0:15:09.440
<v Speaker 1>it's not just I'm saying, like there's so much dark

0:15:09.480 --> 0:15:12.080
<v Speaker 1>shit happening under the surface. Like I wouldn't put it

0:15:12.120 --> 0:15:15.480
<v Speaker 1>past anyone to say, this is the plan we're gonna

0:15:15.520 --> 0:15:18.280
<v Speaker 1>get Karenna have this bitch go on vacation, and then

0:15:18.280 --> 0:15:21.240
<v Speaker 1>when this sun advise her to cut the funding and

0:15:21.320 --> 0:15:23.440
<v Speaker 1>all these things are gonna be the perfect form to

0:15:23.480 --> 0:15:25.840
<v Speaker 1>fuck HERU her, this last woman in a tower and

0:15:26.000 --> 0:15:29.600
<v Speaker 1>like yes, like they're so calculated. And I was slightly like,

0:15:29.720 --> 0:15:33.320
<v Speaker 1>come on, like stop sometimes you're deby saying it. I'm like, nigga,

0:15:33.360 --> 0:15:35.560
<v Speaker 1>aren't you from Texas? I know you're from Texas.

0:15:35.640 --> 0:15:38.040
<v Speaker 2>And he's like, I don't see color. I'm like really,

0:15:39.040 --> 0:15:41.360
<v Speaker 2>I you know, that's what I That's.

0:15:41.200 --> 0:15:44.960
<v Speaker 1>What I mean. My my grandmother voted for Spencer Pratte bitch,

0:15:45.720 --> 0:15:46.800
<v Speaker 1>my eighties.

0:15:46.480 --> 0:15:49.200
<v Speaker 2>On year old Toddy who told her to do this.

0:15:50.080 --> 0:15:52.720
<v Speaker 1>My mom confronted her about it and she doubled down.

0:15:53.280 --> 0:15:56.040
<v Speaker 1>But why she's because I wanted to. It's my choice,

0:15:56.120 --> 0:15:57.640
<v Speaker 1>because my mom, my grandmother watches Fox.

0:15:57.840 --> 0:16:01.320
<v Speaker 2>This is fucking I'm I'm but you know what. When

0:16:01.320 --> 0:16:03.960
<v Speaker 2>I was voting, I went to Luna' school to vote,

0:16:04.520 --> 0:16:07.680
<v Speaker 2>and I was like close to this other woman, an

0:16:07.680 --> 0:16:09.840
<v Speaker 2>old woman, and she's like she definitely smokes Newports.

0:16:09.840 --> 0:16:10.640
<v Speaker 1>I could tell by your voice.

0:16:10.680 --> 0:16:13.880
<v Speaker 2>She's like, oh my god, I can't push more fucking cheaters.

0:16:13.880 --> 0:16:15.640
<v Speaker 2>This motherfucker's cheating.

0:16:15.760 --> 0:16:17.080
<v Speaker 1>I knew what this bullshit.

0:16:17.160 --> 0:16:20.040
<v Speaker 2>This is bullshit. I can't push Oh yeah, because they're

0:16:20.040 --> 0:16:22.920
<v Speaker 2>fucking cheating. Yeah, they're cheating. I knew they were cheating

0:16:22.960 --> 0:16:25.000
<v Speaker 2>the whole time. I was like, bitch, I am taking

0:16:25.000 --> 0:16:27.280
<v Speaker 2>a test that relies on the whole government. Can you

0:16:27.320 --> 0:16:28.080
<v Speaker 2>shut the fuck up.

0:16:28.440 --> 0:16:29.760
<v Speaker 1>She's like, Oh, they're fucking cheating.

0:16:29.840 --> 0:16:32.680
<v Speaker 2>I was like, how many old women, like how many

0:16:32.720 --> 0:16:35.760
<v Speaker 2>old people are like coming out in droves who have

0:16:35.880 --> 0:16:36.600
<v Speaker 2>no information?

0:16:37.000 --> 0:16:40.880
<v Speaker 1>Well, they're just literally just watching and picking numbers, picking names.

0:16:41.240 --> 0:16:43.280
<v Speaker 1>He was like Republican, Like I can I don't even know.

0:16:43.320 --> 0:16:44.560
<v Speaker 2>I don't know what she was, but I can tell

0:16:44.560 --> 0:16:48.200
<v Speaker 2>by that Newport's fucking sounding smoking voice talking about everybody's

0:16:48.280 --> 0:16:51.280
<v Speaker 2>cheating that she was fucking Republican. And I was just like,

0:16:53.120 --> 0:16:56.200
<v Speaker 2>we're living in the dark days. Literally, I was at

0:16:56.200 --> 0:16:58.840
<v Speaker 2>the pole, like you sent me that voter guide. I

0:16:58.920 --> 0:17:01.480
<v Speaker 2>was focused so intently, and I was like, if I

0:17:01.480 --> 0:17:04.080
<v Speaker 2>made the wrong answer, it's going to fuck the whole everything.

0:17:04.320 --> 0:17:06.600
<v Speaker 1>You see what's happening. I was there for thirty minutes, bitch,

0:17:06.800 --> 0:17:09.080
<v Speaker 1>looking through the voter guide, and then I realized. I

0:17:09.119 --> 0:17:12.120
<v Speaker 1>was like, I don't have to rush. There's no one's

0:17:12.200 --> 0:17:14.000
<v Speaker 1>rushing me. Because I literally felt like I was under

0:17:14.040 --> 0:17:15.840
<v Speaker 1>a time clock, right. But then I was like trying

0:17:15.840 --> 0:17:17.560
<v Speaker 1>to do research. I was like, I should have studied

0:17:17.560 --> 0:17:20.280
<v Speaker 1>before this. I don't know shit. I can't.

0:17:20.480 --> 0:17:25.160
<v Speaker 2>So Spencer Pratt is in the final the November.

0:17:25.920 --> 0:17:28.760
<v Speaker 1>I can't. I mean I can't. I can believe it,

0:17:29.080 --> 0:17:30.200
<v Speaker 1>but I also can't. I can't.

0:17:30.359 --> 0:17:32.919
<v Speaker 2>I can't believe that California is so dumb. But I

0:17:32.960 --> 0:17:36.480
<v Speaker 2>can because I realized that most people, well.

0:17:36.440 --> 0:17:39.159
<v Speaker 1>You know how many people didn't vote. A lot of

0:17:39.200 --> 0:17:39.800
<v Speaker 1>people didn't.

0:17:39.920 --> 0:17:42.640
<v Speaker 2>They probably gave up because look a lot of people

0:17:42.720 --> 0:17:43.480
<v Speaker 2>didn't vote, Like.

0:17:44.359 --> 0:17:44.960
<v Speaker 1>Why would you not?

0:17:45.160 --> 0:17:46.879
<v Speaker 2>I mean even I've said that I don't give a

0:17:46.880 --> 0:17:48.879
<v Speaker 2>fuck before because I know it's bigger than us. But

0:17:48.960 --> 0:17:50.960
<v Speaker 2>at this time, it's like, if it maybe will help,

0:17:52.280 --> 0:17:54.280
<v Speaker 2>that's all we got this point. If there isn't any

0:17:54.280 --> 0:17:58.399
<v Speaker 2>help for democracy, if the democracy's eating kids, and this

0:17:58.560 --> 0:18:01.040
<v Speaker 2>one ballot's going to make a difference, maybe let's just

0:18:01.119 --> 0:18:04.119
<v Speaker 2>try and see what happens. But I you know what,

0:18:04.240 --> 0:18:09.479
<v Speaker 2>I realize that hope my mom doesn't listen to this.

0:18:10.640 --> 0:18:11.960
<v Speaker 1>Did your mom listen to our podcast?

0:18:11.960 --> 0:18:14.000
<v Speaker 2>No? She hadn't even read the book, which is really

0:18:14.080 --> 0:18:15.320
<v Speaker 2>a kind of a blessing.

0:18:15.560 --> 0:18:19.760
<v Speaker 1>I know my mom doesn't listen, but my stepdad is recording. Rory,

0:18:19.800 --> 0:18:23.880
<v Speaker 1>shut up, don't be telling my mom nothing over there.

0:18:23.960 --> 0:18:26.919
<v Speaker 2>Okay, if you're if you were, if you were with

0:18:26.960 --> 0:18:28.960
<v Speaker 2>good moms, you know we're gonna we're gonna we're gonna

0:18:29.000 --> 0:18:32.080
<v Speaker 2>hire home, We're gonna hire our family, the husband, We're

0:18:32.080 --> 0:18:33.639
<v Speaker 2>gonna keep it in the family. And even if we

0:18:33.640 --> 0:18:35.560
<v Speaker 2>have to talk about Dick, this is the family business

0:18:35.720 --> 0:18:39.760
<v Speaker 2>and politics in front of them. We're gonna do it anyway.

0:18:40.400 --> 0:18:45.399
<v Speaker 2>I feel like our parents are kind of slow, like

0:18:45.520 --> 0:18:48.600
<v Speaker 2>they're kind of like, it's true, like the generation behind us.

0:18:48.800 --> 0:18:51.000
<v Speaker 2>Like I see my parents and I'm like.

0:18:51.080 --> 0:18:52.399
<v Speaker 1>That's what our kids are gonna say about us.

0:18:52.440 --> 0:18:54.160
<v Speaker 2>Okay, well no they're not, because look at our pup

0:18:54.160 --> 0:18:55.160
<v Speaker 2>aggressive we are, look at.

0:18:55.080 --> 0:18:57.359
<v Speaker 1>Our book you know.

0:18:57.440 --> 0:18:59.879
<v Speaker 2>I was so offended limited and inviting me to fucking

0:19:00.359 --> 0:19:03.760
<v Speaker 2>uh career day. I was like, are you embarrassing my career?

0:19:03.840 --> 0:19:06.240
<v Speaker 2>She's like, no, I just like other people do other stuff.

0:19:06.240 --> 0:19:10.240
<v Speaker 2>That's cool. I'm like, okay, well you whatever. My dad

0:19:10.280 --> 0:19:14.040
<v Speaker 2>listens to Kevin Samuels, but my dad probably does too,

0:19:16.119 --> 0:19:18.200
<v Speaker 2>and I'm like, who are you? I thought you were

0:19:18.200 --> 0:19:21.159
<v Speaker 2>like a progressive, smart man, but maybe not. You're just

0:19:21.200 --> 0:19:24.600
<v Speaker 2>a man that made me. And then my mom I

0:19:24.640 --> 0:19:25.800
<v Speaker 2>went out to a barbier. I told you went to

0:19:25.840 --> 0:19:27.960
<v Speaker 2>a barbecue with him last week and everything was fine.

0:19:28.000 --> 0:19:30.080
<v Speaker 2>My mom's been doing really good. And then I like progress.

0:19:30.119 --> 0:19:34.000
<v Speaker 2>I saw I saw the age limit of stopped fucking drinking.

0:19:34.560 --> 0:19:35.520
<v Speaker 1>She drank.

0:19:35.760 --> 0:19:38.200
<v Speaker 2>She started drinking tequila and immediately turned it to a

0:19:38.200 --> 0:19:40.680
<v Speaker 2>different bitch, and I was like, you don't need to

0:19:40.720 --> 0:19:44.879
<v Speaker 2>drink babe, you're embarrassing everybody. And she's just like, ah ah,

0:19:45.200 --> 0:19:46.160
<v Speaker 2>I know how to play.

0:19:46.359 --> 0:19:47.399
<v Speaker 1>I was like, time to go.

0:19:47.920 --> 0:19:51.160
<v Speaker 2>But I realized, I'm like, oh, my parents they're smart,

0:19:51.480 --> 0:19:55.000
<v Speaker 2>but like not as smart as I thought. Well, I mean,

0:19:55.040 --> 0:19:58.000
<v Speaker 2>I'm not like not smart, forgive me, but like there

0:19:58.000 --> 0:19:58.679
<v Speaker 2>are things that.

0:19:59.080 --> 0:20:03.000
<v Speaker 1>There's they get stuck. They're stuck in, they are time

0:20:03.160 --> 0:20:10.119
<v Speaker 1>stamped in a certain ide ideology, and they gravitate towards

0:20:10.160 --> 0:20:14.560
<v Speaker 1>whatever feels familiar. So Kevin Samuels feels familiar to your

0:20:14.600 --> 0:20:18.480
<v Speaker 1>father in whatever way it feels familiar, And Kevin Samuels

0:20:18.480 --> 0:20:20.920
<v Speaker 1>feels familiar to my father, my dad said. My dad

0:20:20.960 --> 0:20:25.480
<v Speaker 1>was on this podcast talking mad shit, saying ridiculous things

0:20:25.560 --> 0:20:30.080
<v Speaker 1>that are totally against everything that I stand for all

0:20:30.119 --> 0:20:33.280
<v Speaker 1>the time. And he's he's and he'll double down, you know,

0:20:33.560 --> 0:20:37.159
<v Speaker 1>Like so I don't know, it's it's how do you

0:20:37.240 --> 0:20:38.119
<v Speaker 1>keep the respect?

0:20:38.160 --> 0:20:40.320
<v Speaker 2>But I'm like, what the fuck are you talking about?

0:20:41.400 --> 0:20:41.520
<v Speaker 1>You know?

0:20:41.600 --> 0:20:42.960
<v Speaker 2>I guess it's like, are we in the place where

0:20:42.960 --> 0:20:45.199
<v Speaker 2>we just don't talk about politics or important things with

0:20:45.240 --> 0:20:47.040
<v Speaker 2>our parents or elso going to disappoint us?

0:20:48.240 --> 0:20:50.760
<v Speaker 1>I hope not. But I mean I've never really talked

0:20:50.760 --> 0:20:52.800
<v Speaker 1>about a lot. Like I talk, I think as I've

0:20:52.840 --> 0:20:54.520
<v Speaker 1>gotten older, I've opened up more to my mom. But

0:20:54.600 --> 0:20:56.680
<v Speaker 1>like as a kid, I helld I hid so much

0:20:56.720 --> 0:21:02.080
<v Speaker 1>from her, and I hid so much from her, but

0:21:02.760 --> 0:21:06.280
<v Speaker 1>a lot of it was because of the intense judgment

0:21:06.320 --> 0:21:08.760
<v Speaker 1>that I had or are you doing bad stuff? Probably?

0:21:09.640 --> 0:21:12.280
<v Speaker 1>I mean yeah, I was like I mean not all

0:21:12.320 --> 0:21:14.639
<v Speaker 1>the time though, But there was a level of distrust

0:21:14.680 --> 0:21:17.800
<v Speaker 1>my mom had for me before I was doing distrustful things.

0:21:18.200 --> 0:21:19.879
<v Speaker 1>So that already made me feel like, you don't want

0:21:19.880 --> 0:21:21.359
<v Speaker 1>to trust me, so I'm not, I don't I'm not

0:21:21.359 --> 0:21:23.520
<v Speaker 1>gonna tell you nothing now. Yeah. And then when I

0:21:23.560 --> 0:21:26.119
<v Speaker 1>did try to give her a little a little nugget

0:21:26.320 --> 0:21:29.560
<v Speaker 1>like like see what would happen, she would always do

0:21:29.600 --> 0:21:31.119
<v Speaker 1>exactly what I thought she was gonna do, which was

0:21:31.119 --> 0:21:33.360
<v Speaker 1>you low against me. Later like that's why you can't

0:21:33.400 --> 0:21:35.480
<v Speaker 1>hang out with that friend, because did it? I'm like, okay, well,

0:21:35.520 --> 0:21:38.040
<v Speaker 1>never telling me about that friend again. So that's why

0:21:38.119 --> 0:21:41.119
<v Speaker 1>I really try not to do that with Iri. And

0:21:41.760 --> 0:21:45.040
<v Speaker 1>you know, it's it's it's hard. And as a parent now,

0:21:45.160 --> 0:21:47.560
<v Speaker 1>like I get it, I get the fear. I get

0:21:47.880 --> 0:21:51.359
<v Speaker 1>I can put myself in her shoes and understand like

0:21:52.160 --> 0:21:55.439
<v Speaker 1>why she did the things that she did. It's just

0:21:55.640 --> 0:21:59.400
<v Speaker 1>I probably now I understand, like she did the best

0:21:59.440 --> 0:22:02.000
<v Speaker 1>that she could with probably what she thought I needed,

0:22:02.000 --> 0:22:05.439
<v Speaker 1>but she didn't really understand me and like how to

0:22:05.480 --> 0:22:08.080
<v Speaker 1>communicate with me and what would have made me feel safe.

0:22:08.119 --> 0:22:09.920
<v Speaker 1>And that's what I was trying to talk to Irie

0:22:09.920 --> 0:22:12.680
<v Speaker 1>about yesterday because I had a pretty I wasn't trying

0:22:12.680 --> 0:22:15.080
<v Speaker 1>to have an intense conversation with her, but the moment

0:22:15.119 --> 0:22:17.399
<v Speaker 1>I brought up something that like she thought she was

0:22:17.400 --> 0:22:20.280
<v Speaker 1>gonna get in trouble for, she immediately like broke, like

0:22:20.400 --> 0:22:22.440
<v Speaker 1>broke down crying, and I was like, oh my god.

0:22:22.480 --> 0:22:24.200
<v Speaker 1>And I asked her. I was like, Iri, is there

0:22:24.240 --> 0:22:26.680
<v Speaker 1>another way you need me to communicate with you about

0:22:26.760 --> 0:22:30.680
<v Speaker 1>like when I'm when I'm having conversations about just things

0:22:30.680 --> 0:22:34.199
<v Speaker 1>that I hope and dream for you, or even critiquing you.

0:22:34.480 --> 0:22:36.080
<v Speaker 1>And then then I was asking her this and I'm like,

0:22:36.119 --> 0:22:38.520
<v Speaker 1>she don't know how she can't, She don't know, she

0:22:38.520 --> 0:22:40.440
<v Speaker 1>don't have an answer for me. It's just like I'm

0:22:40.480 --> 0:22:42.160
<v Speaker 1>just weighing it and trying to figure it out as

0:22:42.160 --> 0:22:45.520
<v Speaker 1>I go. And that's that's the hardest part about parenting

0:22:45.560 --> 0:22:48.960
<v Speaker 1>in general. It's like she is not me. I can't parent.

0:22:49.200 --> 0:22:51.199
<v Speaker 1>I'm trying to parent her in the way that I

0:22:51.240 --> 0:22:53.400
<v Speaker 1>wish that I was parented in ways, But then I'm

0:22:53.440 --> 0:22:56.280
<v Speaker 1>also seeing how that's not backfiring in ways too. It's

0:22:56.359 --> 0:22:57.919
<v Speaker 1>not working sometimes, so it's.

0:22:57.800 --> 0:22:59.480
<v Speaker 2>Like, what do you mean, like being like, I'm cool,

0:22:59.480 --> 0:23:01.720
<v Speaker 2>you can tell me anything. Okay, it's not working, no.

0:23:03.160 --> 0:23:06.919
<v Speaker 1>And so you know, I mean maybe it is. She

0:23:07.000 --> 0:23:09.280
<v Speaker 1>ended up did She ended up divulging something to me

0:23:09.359 --> 0:23:12.639
<v Speaker 1>that I already knew, and I was really grateful and

0:23:12.680 --> 0:23:14.200
<v Speaker 1>I told her. I was like, thank you, like, thank

0:23:14.200 --> 0:23:17.399
<v Speaker 1>you for telling me that, Like that's exciting, you know,

0:23:17.680 --> 0:23:20.480
<v Speaker 1>And we talked about it in the car more like basically,

0:23:20.520 --> 0:23:21.800
<v Speaker 1>she told me she had a crush, and like I

0:23:21.800 --> 0:23:23.760
<v Speaker 1>already knew she had a crush, but she refused to

0:23:23.760 --> 0:23:26.800
<v Speaker 1>tell me. And I guess my bad choice of the

0:23:26.840 --> 0:23:28.960
<v Speaker 1>week was that when I told her about my crush,

0:23:29.000 --> 0:23:31.159
<v Speaker 1>I told her that, yeah, you know, I kissed, I

0:23:31.200 --> 0:23:34.359
<v Speaker 1>had my first cast at eleven, but my crush went

0:23:34.400 --> 0:23:37.480
<v Speaker 1>to jail. She was like what I was like, I

0:23:37.560 --> 0:23:41.239
<v Speaker 1>probably could have not told her that part, but I

0:23:41.320 --> 0:23:44.400
<v Speaker 1>was like, maybe if I gave her, maybe if I overshare,

0:23:44.880 --> 0:23:47.560
<v Speaker 1>then maybe she will feel more comfortable just giving me

0:23:47.640 --> 0:23:51.240
<v Speaker 1>a little bit, But I don't know. It's like this

0:23:51.320 --> 0:23:53.200
<v Speaker 1>parenting shit is so hard. I don't think our parents

0:23:53.200 --> 0:23:57.040
<v Speaker 1>are slow. I just think that they are on their

0:23:57.080 --> 0:24:00.320
<v Speaker 1>own side of the algorithm in their life, not just

0:24:00.359 --> 0:24:02.159
<v Speaker 1>on the Internet, but in their life, Like in the

0:24:02.200 --> 0:24:04.840
<v Speaker 1>people that they're with, the people that they're hanging out with,

0:24:04.880 --> 0:24:09.480
<v Speaker 1>who are also from whatever age or whatever time and

0:24:09.600 --> 0:24:12.080
<v Speaker 1>life and time and life, that's who they're talking to.

0:24:12.200 --> 0:24:14.159
<v Speaker 1>Those are the people that they're conversating with. They're not

0:24:14.200 --> 0:24:17.360
<v Speaker 1>conversating with people of our age and younger, Like that's

0:24:17.400 --> 0:24:18.720
<v Speaker 1>not the information that they're getting.

0:24:18.760 --> 0:24:21.479
<v Speaker 2>So it's like it's kind of like proof, like if

0:24:21.520 --> 0:24:26.280
<v Speaker 2>you don't expand your friend group or your environment, you

0:24:26.359 --> 0:24:28.919
<v Speaker 2>will be like you will believe the same shit that

0:24:28.960 --> 0:24:30.320
<v Speaker 2>you believe in twenty years ago.

0:24:30.320 --> 0:24:32.320
<v Speaker 1>I think that's why it's important that as we get older,

0:24:32.400 --> 0:24:36.000
<v Speaker 1>we stay connected, we stay connected to younger people because

0:24:36.040 --> 0:24:38.840
<v Speaker 1>like they're the closest, they're the heartbeat to what is

0:24:38.920 --> 0:24:42.520
<v Speaker 1>actually happening in the world right now, you know. So

0:24:42.560 --> 0:24:44.880
<v Speaker 1>it's easy for you'd be like, oh, like the gen zs,

0:24:44.880 --> 0:24:46.720
<v Speaker 1>they're stupid, they're dumb, but they don't know anything, and

0:24:46.720 --> 0:24:50.200
<v Speaker 1>it's like they know something. They they know something over there,

0:24:50.400 --> 0:24:53.680
<v Speaker 1>some of them, some of them. Yeah, but like millennials,

0:24:53.720 --> 0:24:55.960
<v Speaker 1>we're not the fucking smartest either, you know, like we're

0:24:55.960 --> 0:24:59.960
<v Speaker 1>all just trying our best. Yeah, so I don't know.

0:25:00.280 --> 0:25:03.160
<v Speaker 2>Well, Spencer Pratt's on the ballot, So.

0:25:04.480 --> 0:25:08.320
<v Speaker 1>I'm gonna smoke for that, because what the fuck? That's

0:25:10.119 --> 0:25:13.760
<v Speaker 1>that's crazy, It's really dumb. But did you see him

0:25:13.760 --> 0:25:18.000
<v Speaker 1>have lunch with the Rolling Sixties? Oh? You did it?

0:25:18.560 --> 0:25:20.800
<v Speaker 1>What the fuck are you talking about? He went to

0:25:20.800 --> 0:25:25.080
<v Speaker 1>the hood, the gang, yes, bitch. He there's a video

0:25:25.200 --> 0:25:29.240
<v Speaker 1>of him at some chicken spot, a chicken yet he's

0:25:29.280 --> 0:25:31.560
<v Speaker 1>eating chicken, yes, bitch with the hood?

0:25:32.359 --> 0:25:36.280
<v Speaker 2>Who put in this call? Who made this call for Spencer?

0:25:36.359 --> 0:25:40.119
<v Speaker 2>I have a huge problem. What nigga accepted the money

0:25:40.480 --> 0:25:42.880
<v Speaker 2>to get him a lunch date with the Rolling Sixties?

0:25:42.920 --> 0:25:47.760
<v Speaker 1>Bitch? Because you did. He's in lunch with the Rolling Sixties.

0:25:47.840 --> 0:25:49.600
<v Speaker 1>He even did an interview like I just had lunch

0:25:49.640 --> 0:25:54.119
<v Speaker 1>with the Rolling Sixties. It was great and they probably

0:25:54.160 --> 0:25:56.480
<v Speaker 1>loved it because he's like like a silly little like

0:25:57.440 --> 0:26:05.159
<v Speaker 1>powering white boys put not Palaestindian, Palasadian, Pacific Palisades specific Palsadian.

0:26:05.240 --> 0:26:07.639
<v Speaker 2>Okay, I never heard anyone who use that. I just,

0:26:08.000 --> 0:26:10.560
<v Speaker 2>you know, I think I'm gonna just take the road of.

0:26:12.359 --> 0:26:13.040
<v Speaker 1>Did see.

0:26:13.880 --> 0:26:16.520
<v Speaker 2>I'm gonna be like what evs If the world ends whatever,

0:26:17.359 --> 0:26:19.760
<v Speaker 2>I'm fine. I'm just gonna wear I'm gonna wear my

0:26:19.800 --> 0:26:20.880
<v Speaker 2>housewife clothes.

0:26:22.040 --> 0:26:24.000
<v Speaker 1>Yesterday, my mom said that Rory is ready to move

0:26:24.040 --> 0:26:27.879
<v Speaker 1>to Costa Rica, and I said, let's go, not Rory. Now.

0:26:28.000 --> 0:26:29.879
<v Speaker 2>Now everybody's ready for I'm just waiting for.

0:26:29.920 --> 0:26:31.600
<v Speaker 1>I don't know what I'm waiting for. I'm used to

0:26:31.720 --> 0:26:32.840
<v Speaker 1>go on my own and do it on my own.

0:26:32.920 --> 0:26:34.520
<v Speaker 1>But like I've been, at first, I thought it was

0:26:34.520 --> 0:26:36.240
<v Speaker 1>gonna be my nigga that was gonna like get me

0:26:36.320 --> 0:26:38.200
<v Speaker 1>to go. Like I just I don't want to go alone.

0:26:38.240 --> 0:26:39.840
<v Speaker 1>So I'm like, what are we going? Let's go.

0:26:39.920 --> 0:26:41.840
<v Speaker 2>We need to build the house. We need to build

0:26:42.080 --> 0:26:44.479
<v Speaker 2>something on our land, or just get a tent, for

0:26:44.680 --> 0:26:47.520
<v Speaker 2>God's sake, so just buy a good tent. If we

0:26:47.520 --> 0:26:52.440
<v Speaker 2>could just get a good tent, maybe a you're maybe.

0:26:50.920 --> 0:26:54.600
<v Speaker 1>See the container house two years. It's good air conditioning. Yeah,

0:26:54.640 --> 0:26:55.320
<v Speaker 1>that's all we need.

0:26:55.359 --> 0:26:57.560
<v Speaker 2>If we have air conditioning and some mosquito nets we'll

0:26:57.600 --> 0:26:58.080
<v Speaker 2>be fine.

0:26:59.080 --> 0:27:00.000
<v Speaker 1>It might not have a choice.

0:27:00.040 --> 0:27:04.920
<v Speaker 2>The fucking Spencer Pratt comes into office. Yeah, we're gonna

0:27:04.920 --> 0:27:07.760
<v Speaker 2>have to smoke. I'm just gonna smoke and just watch

0:27:08.280 --> 0:27:11.120
<v Speaker 2>Watch America like a movie that I'm not in.

0:27:14.960 --> 0:27:15.400
<v Speaker 1>Anyway.

0:27:16.800 --> 0:27:21.240
<v Speaker 2>It's Father's Day week. Did you make any bad choices

0:27:21.280 --> 0:27:21.640
<v Speaker 2>this week?

0:27:22.240 --> 0:27:26.240
<v Speaker 1>Bad mom? Not a bad mom, but a bad mom.

0:27:26.440 --> 0:27:35.720
<v Speaker 1>It's so good. I just told you my bad choice

0:27:37.119 --> 0:27:39.520
<v Speaker 1>that I told Iri that my eleven year old crush

0:27:39.560 --> 0:27:43.760
<v Speaker 1>went to jail. And she knows him too. That's the

0:27:43.800 --> 0:27:45.840
<v Speaker 1>craziest part too, is that she's met my loven year

0:27:45.880 --> 0:27:50.879
<v Speaker 1>old crush because of Luna. Because of Luna. Yeah, what

0:27:50.920 --> 0:27:53.280
<v Speaker 1>did Luna get to do with? Oh?

0:27:53.440 --> 0:27:55.639
<v Speaker 2>That that's my first that's what you're talking about. It

0:27:55.720 --> 0:27:57.440
<v Speaker 2>was my first crush and my first kid.

0:27:57.520 --> 0:27:58.480
<v Speaker 1>Now you went to jail.

0:27:58.480 --> 0:28:00.800
<v Speaker 2>I didn't know you were talking about. He did twice?

0:28:01.680 --> 0:28:04.640
<v Speaker 1>She said, was he there for a long time? I said, yeah, twice.

0:28:04.680 --> 0:28:06.640
<v Speaker 1>Out now he did this and I did. I said,

0:28:06.680 --> 0:28:08.840
<v Speaker 1>he changed his life though you saw his house. He's

0:28:08.840 --> 0:28:12.880
<v Speaker 1>living good. She went over there, Yes, recently, like last

0:28:12.880 --> 0:28:16.960
<v Speaker 1>summer with Luna with Bob. Yeah, Bobby and Luna. Don't

0:28:16.960 --> 0:28:20.040
<v Speaker 1>say her baby daddy's name one here you've never heard.

0:28:20.280 --> 0:28:22.560
<v Speaker 2>I don't think I said it before, okay, not that

0:28:22.600 --> 0:28:23.480
<v Speaker 2>anybody cares.

0:28:23.960 --> 0:28:26.399
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, Like what, I don't know him? I not.

0:28:31.359 --> 0:28:35.480
<v Speaker 2>Oh, okay, I heard that from the grapevine aka Luna.

0:28:35.520 --> 0:28:39.480
<v Speaker 2>He has two girlfriends, okay, explaining two bitches? Oh yeah,

0:28:39.480 --> 0:28:40.880
<v Speaker 2>she said, I don't know which. I don't know who's

0:28:40.880 --> 0:28:42.320
<v Speaker 2>the side one and who's the main one. I thought

0:28:42.320 --> 0:28:44.000
<v Speaker 2>it was other y around, but maybe I was wrong.

0:28:45.200 --> 0:28:46.840
<v Speaker 2>I was like, okay, I said. I asked her, does

0:28:46.840 --> 0:28:50.240
<v Speaker 2>your dad tell you not to mention other girls when

0:28:51.600 --> 0:28:53.560
<v Speaker 2>the other ones around? She said, yeah, he texts me

0:28:53.640 --> 0:28:54.680
<v Speaker 2>don't talk about so.

0:28:54.920 --> 0:28:56.880
<v Speaker 1>What the fuck? I was like, this is healthy for

0:28:56.920 --> 0:29:00.800
<v Speaker 1>a girl. I don't like that. That's not Louis responsibility.

0:29:00.880 --> 0:29:01.400
<v Speaker 1>What the fuck?

0:29:01.680 --> 0:29:03.280
<v Speaker 2>Oh baby, welcome to fatherhood.

0:29:03.400 --> 0:29:06.040
<v Speaker 1>Your dad never tell you that? You never said, don't

0:29:06.040 --> 0:29:08.080
<v Speaker 1>say anything about it? Absolutely not my dad.

0:29:08.120 --> 0:29:09.400
<v Speaker 2>My dad told me to keep saying it to my

0:29:09.440 --> 0:29:11.280
<v Speaker 2>mom all the time, really all the time.

0:29:11.360 --> 0:29:12.920
<v Speaker 1>Don't tell your mom. Don't tell your mom or did this?

0:29:12.920 --> 0:29:14.840
<v Speaker 1>Don't tell your around we're here, don't tell your mom.

0:29:14.880 --> 0:29:16.880
<v Speaker 1>Oh no, my dad's a sneaky fuck.

0:29:17.680 --> 0:29:18.880
<v Speaker 2>That's why I have trusted.

0:29:18.840 --> 0:29:21.080
<v Speaker 1>My dad was just an open ho. Well, I respect

0:29:21.120 --> 0:29:23.240
<v Speaker 1>to open ho. He was openly hoeing, So I don't

0:29:23.280 --> 0:29:25.040
<v Speaker 1>think it was ever that. I don't think the girls

0:29:25.040 --> 0:29:25.400
<v Speaker 1>all knew.

0:29:25.520 --> 0:29:27.920
<v Speaker 2>That's why I'm an open ho, because I didn't have

0:29:27.920 --> 0:29:29.080
<v Speaker 2>an open ho father.

0:29:31.320 --> 0:29:33.400
<v Speaker 1>Well, that was one big gift my dad gave me. Uh,

0:29:34.560 --> 0:29:41.239
<v Speaker 1>thank you, thanks Dad. Happy Father's Day, No, happy Father's Day,

0:29:41.280 --> 0:29:43.520
<v Speaker 1>to the to the good Dad's out there. You guys

0:29:43.960 --> 0:29:46.240
<v Speaker 1>guys are killing it. You guys are doing the Lord's

0:29:46.280 --> 0:29:50.880
<v Speaker 1>an amazing job. You know, children, boys, girls, you know

0:29:50.920 --> 0:29:52.600
<v Speaker 1>my dad. You know, my dad said yesterday that was

0:29:52.640 --> 0:29:58.520
<v Speaker 1>really interesting. He said, sons really need fathers. Oh really

0:29:59.320 --> 0:29:59.720
<v Speaker 1>you think?

0:30:00.880 --> 0:30:03.560
<v Speaker 2>And when he said that, sugared the fun kind. I

0:30:03.600 --> 0:30:04.480
<v Speaker 2>know that triggered the fuck.

0:30:04.600 --> 0:30:08.880
<v Speaker 1>I was like, okay, and he was telling Then he

0:30:08.920 --> 0:30:10.800
<v Speaker 1>proceeded to tell me, you know, all the ways in

0:30:10.840 --> 0:30:15.360
<v Speaker 1>which he's you know, guiding his son. And I'm just

0:30:15.400 --> 0:30:19.360
<v Speaker 1>thinking about just yeah, his relationship with his daughters, and

0:30:19.960 --> 0:30:24.080
<v Speaker 1>it's complicated for him. And I just want to say

0:30:24.120 --> 0:30:29.160
<v Speaker 1>that father's, your children, your daughters, your daughters really need you.

0:30:29.320 --> 0:30:32.520
<v Speaker 1>And it's equal for different reasons.

0:30:32.120 --> 0:30:34.520
<v Speaker 2>Because women and men provide different things that women and

0:30:34.600 --> 0:30:38.320
<v Speaker 2>men both need, yeah, to see examples of and for

0:30:38.360 --> 0:30:41.960
<v Speaker 2>that for romantic relationships. Did you say anything when he

0:30:41.960 --> 0:30:43.120
<v Speaker 2>said that? Or you just let them talk?

0:30:43.240 --> 0:30:45.680
<v Speaker 1>Girl, I had already had a day. I had no

0:30:45.840 --> 0:30:48.920
<v Speaker 1>fucks to give about communicating with either one of my parents.

0:30:50.240 --> 0:30:52.600
<v Speaker 1>I was like, let me just eat this motherfucking salad

0:30:53.720 --> 0:30:55.120
<v Speaker 1>and just get through this TenneT.

0:30:55.280 --> 0:30:57.320
<v Speaker 2>I'm telling you, like, it's best as an adult to

0:30:57.320 --> 0:30:59.719
<v Speaker 2>just be an observer, Like, don't you don't have what

0:30:59.800 --> 0:31:04.280
<v Speaker 2>it's Can you make this be quiet? You don't have

0:31:04.360 --> 0:31:08.240
<v Speaker 2>to I'm realizing in this big age, you don't have

0:31:08.320 --> 0:31:10.840
<v Speaker 2>to put yourself in the middle. You don't have to

0:31:10.920 --> 0:31:13.719
<v Speaker 2>like interject your opinion. Some people are just not going

0:31:13.800 --> 0:31:14.760
<v Speaker 2>to change anyway.

0:31:15.080 --> 0:31:15.800
<v Speaker 1>Most people are not.

0:31:15.880 --> 0:31:17.880
<v Speaker 2>Even if I see someone like my intuitively, like I

0:31:18.280 --> 0:31:19.960
<v Speaker 2>always want to like go to people like are you good?

0:31:20.000 --> 0:31:23.360
<v Speaker 2>Are you I'm like, I'm not doing that anymore. I'm

0:31:23.360 --> 0:31:26.760
<v Speaker 2>not interjecting myself into any conversations. If a strength, even

0:31:26.760 --> 0:31:28.360
<v Speaker 2>if I see a strength, like if you're crying, if

0:31:28.360 --> 0:31:29.880
<v Speaker 2>you fell down, you're bleeding, I'm the only one in

0:31:29.880 --> 0:31:30.240
<v Speaker 2>the corner.

0:31:30.320 --> 0:31:34.040
<v Speaker 1>Maybe you're not interjecting yourself in any conversations.

0:31:34.320 --> 0:31:38.720
<v Speaker 2>I will cry because you're like I'm talking ass a bitch.

0:31:38.760 --> 0:31:40.080
<v Speaker 1>I walk on the street.

0:31:40.080 --> 0:31:41.880
<v Speaker 2>I'm like, la la, la, la la, what'd you say?

0:31:42.080 --> 0:31:43.840
<v Speaker 1>Are you okay? I have an opinion about that? Let

0:31:43.840 --> 0:31:45.520
<v Speaker 1>me tell you about are you crying? I saw this

0:31:45.520 --> 0:31:46.400
<v Speaker 1>thing on Instagram and.

0:31:46.360 --> 0:31:48.920
<v Speaker 2>Actually, ya la la la la, I do and I

0:31:49.040 --> 0:31:53.959
<v Speaker 2>just I'm done. God brought it in Jamaica's actually in Jamaica.

0:31:54.000 --> 0:32:03.200
<v Speaker 2>God said, Dota be quiet. God said, dotta set You

0:32:03.240 --> 0:32:05.800
<v Speaker 2>know I told you about in Jamaica. I was in

0:32:05.840 --> 0:32:08.280
<v Speaker 2>a small town and I was like asking this nice lady, like,

0:32:08.320 --> 0:32:10.080
<v Speaker 2>how does your baby? She has a newborn and she

0:32:10.160 --> 0:32:13.320
<v Speaker 2>was like one month. I was like, oh, like I said,

0:32:13.360 --> 0:32:15.400
<v Speaker 2>your first baby. She's like, no, it's my last baby.

0:32:15.480 --> 0:32:17.480
<v Speaker 2>Is my wash belly. It's my last baby. And I

0:32:17.480 --> 0:32:19.120
<v Speaker 2>was like, oh, I'm gonna have my wash belly soon.

0:32:19.480 --> 0:32:20.920
<v Speaker 2>And she looked at me and she pointed at my

0:32:20.960 --> 0:32:24.280
<v Speaker 2>stomach and she said you're gonna have twins. And I

0:32:24.320 --> 0:32:27.480
<v Speaker 2>said what And Lena said, I told you stopp talking

0:32:27.480 --> 0:32:31.440
<v Speaker 2>to strangers. And literally I feel like she put a

0:32:32.800 --> 0:32:35.240
<v Speaker 2>calling on my life. And I was really scared, and

0:32:35.280 --> 0:32:36.440
<v Speaker 2>I was like, how did I meet the only one

0:32:36.480 --> 0:32:39.360
<v Speaker 2>Jamaican witch on this fucking block, And as soon as

0:32:39.400 --> 0:32:40.880
<v Speaker 2>I turned around and looked at Orlando, he said, I

0:32:40.920 --> 0:32:43.840
<v Speaker 2>told you to stop talking to strangers, and I said, okay,

0:32:44.520 --> 0:32:46.280
<v Speaker 2>I get it. And then, you know, I don't know

0:32:46.280 --> 0:32:48.440
<v Speaker 2>if anyone knows Orlando's mom is a twin. So now

0:32:48.480 --> 0:32:51.120
<v Speaker 2>I feel like I'm maybe she hext me. But it

0:32:51.160 --> 0:32:52.680
<v Speaker 2>was another time I was like wanting to talk to

0:32:52.720 --> 0:32:55.040
<v Speaker 2>a lady. She looked sad, and then I realized shortly

0:32:55.120 --> 0:32:56.960
<v Speaker 2>after she was like hell, like a real one, like

0:32:57.000 --> 0:32:59.320
<v Speaker 2>a prostitute. And I was like, this is where I

0:32:59.400 --> 0:33:02.520
<v Speaker 2>stopped talking to people, because just because I'm reading someone's

0:33:02.600 --> 0:33:05.840
<v Speaker 2>energy does not mean that they are open to anything

0:33:05.840 --> 0:33:07.840
<v Speaker 2>that I'm saying. Nine times out of ten they're not,

0:33:07.960 --> 0:33:09.160
<v Speaker 2>So I'm just gonna fucking.

0:33:08.880 --> 0:33:09.600
<v Speaker 1>Shut the fuck up.

0:33:10.240 --> 0:33:13.239
<v Speaker 2>I give blankets and food to people in need, but

0:33:13.280 --> 0:33:14.920
<v Speaker 2>I do not give conversation.

0:33:15.520 --> 0:33:17.280
<v Speaker 1>Welcome to the shot the fuck up side of the

0:33:17.280 --> 0:33:19.680
<v Speaker 1>world over here. You know, I thought my shut the

0:33:19.680 --> 0:33:20.200
<v Speaker 1>fuck up a lot.

0:33:20.240 --> 0:33:22.520
<v Speaker 2>I thought my calling was to like talk to people,

0:33:22.600 --> 0:33:24.960
<v Speaker 2>and sometimes it is, but that's only the retreat.

0:33:25.080 --> 0:33:29.160
<v Speaker 1>It's there's seasons. My life is the season of shut.

0:33:28.920 --> 0:33:32.320
<v Speaker 2>The fuck I'm as I go into thirty eight this

0:33:32.440 --> 0:33:35.680
<v Speaker 2>year thirty eight, I will be thirty eight. You guys,

0:33:35.760 --> 0:33:38.200
<v Speaker 2>I started Good Mom's Bad Choices when I was twenty nine,

0:33:39.120 --> 0:33:42.080
<v Speaker 2>So I will be thirty eight on this couch.

0:33:42.520 --> 0:33:44.360
<v Speaker 1>And wow, that's pretty cool.

0:33:45.360 --> 0:33:48.560
<v Speaker 2>But yeah, that's that's my new that's my download for

0:33:48.640 --> 0:33:51.400
<v Speaker 2>my going into year thirty eight. I'm an observer. I'm

0:33:51.440 --> 0:33:55.720
<v Speaker 2>not interjecting. Actually, unless you explicitly ask me for my opinion.

0:33:56.080 --> 0:33:58.440
<v Speaker 2>I'm not saying fucking shit. I'm just gonna smile and

0:33:58.520 --> 0:34:04.400
<v Speaker 2>nod or look away. So if you see me falling

0:34:04.440 --> 0:34:07.360
<v Speaker 2>into my old ways, snatch me up. Let's go, a bitch,

0:34:07.760 --> 0:34:10.879
<v Speaker 2>stop talking, Okay, practice it all right?

0:34:11.000 --> 0:34:13.520
<v Speaker 1>You know I have no problem snatching your web like

0:34:13.520 --> 0:34:20.560
<v Speaker 1>I'm ready to go, let's go. Yeah. So I'm well,

0:34:20.800 --> 0:34:23.279
<v Speaker 1>I'm trying to be more social. I meanwhile, I'm trying

0:34:23.280 --> 0:34:26.560
<v Speaker 1>to be more outside. I just booked my first solo trip.

0:34:26.760 --> 0:34:31.120
<v Speaker 1>Where are you going? I'm going to Mexico City and

0:34:31.160 --> 0:34:36.120
<v Speaker 1>I'm going to what does Gondido nice? And I'm really excited.

0:34:36.360 --> 0:34:40.480
<v Speaker 1>I'm excited. And this is my gift to myself for

0:34:40.760 --> 0:34:45.800
<v Speaker 1>uh A, raising a fifth grader going to middle school.

0:34:46.120 --> 0:34:48.840
<v Speaker 1>Number one, I can't believe it. Number two I realized

0:34:48.840 --> 0:34:49.960
<v Speaker 1>next year, I'm going to be forty.

0:34:50.000 --> 0:34:53.919
<v Speaker 2>I was like, what the fuck, that's crazier almost forty trip.

0:34:54.880 --> 0:34:56.239
<v Speaker 1>But I was just like, I just don't need to go.

0:34:56.280 --> 0:34:58.320
<v Speaker 1>I want to go and just reflect on my life

0:34:58.440 --> 0:35:00.640
<v Speaker 1>and like what's going on? Are you go? Like what

0:35:00.680 --> 0:35:02.680
<v Speaker 1>do you need to do? What do you where do

0:35:02.680 --> 0:35:06.240
<v Speaker 1>you want to be by the time that that milestone hits,

0:35:06.480 --> 0:35:08.759
<v Speaker 1>like and not putting so much pressure on myself, but

0:35:08.880 --> 0:35:14.279
<v Speaker 1>just giving myself some time to just be still and alone.

0:35:14.360 --> 0:35:16.279
<v Speaker 1>And I don't really have a I don't really have

0:35:16.320 --> 0:35:18.880
<v Speaker 1>a problem being alone, but I've never really been alone

0:35:19.320 --> 0:35:24.799
<v Speaker 1>traveling literally by myself through city to city, and I'm

0:35:24.840 --> 0:35:26.560
<v Speaker 1>really looking forward to it. It's so crazy.

0:35:26.600 --> 0:35:28.720
<v Speaker 2>I've literally been that's been on my heart for a while,

0:35:28.880 --> 0:35:31.160
<v Speaker 2>like like to go on a trip alone. And then

0:35:31.200 --> 0:35:32.680
<v Speaker 2>I was like, are you go to a silent retreat?

0:35:33.600 --> 0:35:34.759
<v Speaker 2>And then I you know, and then I was like,

0:35:34.760 --> 0:35:35.960
<v Speaker 2>I would like to go on to a silent retreat

0:35:35.960 --> 0:35:40.279
<v Speaker 2>that's one week silent with electronics, one week's silently with that.

0:35:41.280 --> 0:35:43.799
<v Speaker 2>But I was just like, I've never gone on a

0:35:43.920 --> 0:35:47.319
<v Speaker 2>solo trip, like not really like not like I'm going

0:35:47.360 --> 0:35:49.479
<v Speaker 2>to go not meet some like meet somebody or meet

0:35:49.520 --> 0:35:52.680
<v Speaker 2>people or like a retreat. I've never done that, and

0:35:52.719 --> 0:35:55.319
<v Speaker 2>I'm really and I wanted to do that, like four

0:35:55.360 --> 0:35:57.080
<v Speaker 2>years ago. I told Orlando that and then he'said, I'll

0:35:57.120 --> 0:35:59.800
<v Speaker 2>go I see you in Mexico, which that's not alone.

0:36:00.800 --> 0:36:02.120
<v Speaker 2>So I do I want to go on like a

0:36:02.239 --> 0:36:05.680
<v Speaker 2>like a you know, like a nice like nice length

0:36:05.800 --> 0:36:09.239
<v Speaker 2>trip alone. The only thing my problem, the only fear

0:36:09.280 --> 0:36:10.880
<v Speaker 2>I have, but maybe not since I'm going into this

0:36:10.880 --> 0:36:13.240
<v Speaker 2>new year at thirty eight of shutting the fuck up. Before,

0:36:13.360 --> 0:36:16.319
<v Speaker 2>I was like, I will get into trouble alone for me.

0:36:16.560 --> 0:36:18.480
<v Speaker 2>I know, like I go alone, I'm gonna be twenty

0:36:18.520 --> 0:36:20.719
<v Speaker 2>five friends. I'm gonna be on a nigga's yeah at

0:36:20.719 --> 0:36:23.400
<v Speaker 2>four am, and I am going to be at a

0:36:23.400 --> 0:36:25.600
<v Speaker 2>family's home, like I'm gonna be in the next city

0:36:25.640 --> 0:36:27.319
<v Speaker 2>over even though no one told me to go there.

0:36:27.440 --> 0:36:29.520
<v Speaker 1>This is my fear about traveling alone, is that I

0:36:29.520 --> 0:36:29.879
<v Speaker 1>will be.

0:36:29.840 --> 0:36:33.000
<v Speaker 2>Like, Okay, sure, let's go, and it will be fine,

0:36:33.040 --> 0:36:34.560
<v Speaker 2>and I will be fine, but then I'll come back

0:36:34.560 --> 0:36:36.680
<v Speaker 2>and be like I have fourteen adventures and not not

0:36:36.760 --> 0:36:39.400
<v Speaker 2>a lot alone time. So I'm like this year, I'm

0:36:39.400 --> 0:36:41.520
<v Speaker 2>gonna I'm gonna also do that, and I'm gonna make

0:36:41.520 --> 0:36:43.200
<v Speaker 2>it a habit to not make too many friends.

0:36:44.560 --> 0:36:47.600
<v Speaker 1>Okay, that sounds kind of sad, but I get. I

0:36:47.640 --> 0:36:48.360
<v Speaker 1>get what you're saying.

0:36:48.400 --> 0:36:50.080
<v Speaker 2>I have a lot of friends I have. I have

0:36:50.200 --> 0:36:52.719
<v Speaker 2>enough friends. I'm actually maybe at the maximum of my

0:36:52.800 --> 0:36:55.399
<v Speaker 2>friend list. I have maxed out.

0:36:55.680 --> 0:36:57.759
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I'm I want to go be in just like

0:36:57.840 --> 0:37:01.920
<v Speaker 1>my own energy outside, Like what am I like outside

0:37:02.239 --> 0:37:06.319
<v Speaker 1>by myself consistently and maybe not outside I'm probably gonna

0:37:06.360 --> 0:37:08.200
<v Speaker 1>be inside a lot too, because I want to do

0:37:08.280 --> 0:37:13.160
<v Speaker 1>some creating and stuff. But yeah, I'm like, what kind

0:37:13.160 --> 0:37:16.399
<v Speaker 1>of like going to a bar by yourself, like going

0:37:16.400 --> 0:37:20.040
<v Speaker 1>to dinner by yourself, like just get like small, going

0:37:20.080 --> 0:37:22.360
<v Speaker 1>to lunch by taking yourself out, and like it may

0:37:22.440 --> 0:37:24.480
<v Speaker 1>not be by myself. I make friends too outside like

0:37:24.520 --> 0:37:28.320
<v Speaker 1>I probably will like fall upon a friend or something.

0:37:28.360 --> 0:37:31.520
<v Speaker 1>But I really do want to experience that in this

0:37:31.600 --> 0:37:34.520
<v Speaker 1>next chapter of my life because I've I've gone through

0:37:34.520 --> 0:37:36.640
<v Speaker 1>a lot of changes, like I'm single now and like

0:37:37.239 --> 0:37:42.920
<v Speaker 1>I just I went from one relationship to another beautiful relationship.

0:37:43.880 --> 0:37:47.600
<v Speaker 1>But now it's like, Okay, I've been in the company

0:37:47.640 --> 0:37:50.560
<v Speaker 1>of a lot of people's energies close up for a

0:37:50.600 --> 0:37:53.160
<v Speaker 1>while on top of just being a mom, and I'm

0:37:53.200 --> 0:37:57.240
<v Speaker 1>just really looking forward to just being in my own. Yeah,

0:37:57.360 --> 0:38:02.120
<v Speaker 1>I in my own and like yeah, just like experiencing

0:38:02.120 --> 0:38:09.160
<v Speaker 1>myself in a new environment and allowing myself to be free,

0:38:09.200 --> 0:38:11.319
<v Speaker 1>which I don't really have. I'm a free ass bitch,

0:38:11.360 --> 0:38:14.799
<v Speaker 1>but like just I don't know, like who am I

0:38:14.880 --> 0:38:17.040
<v Speaker 1>now in this chapter of my life because I have

0:38:17.160 --> 0:38:23.000
<v Speaker 1>evolved and changed a lot, And yeah, I'm so excited.

0:38:23.520 --> 0:38:25.960
<v Speaker 1>I mean, I couldn't agree more.

0:38:26.320 --> 0:38:28.759
<v Speaker 2>I think that we have been going really hard for

0:38:28.800 --> 0:38:31.759
<v Speaker 2>a really long time, and I'm realizing now, like as

0:38:31.800 --> 0:38:34.520
<v Speaker 2>I'm I guess we've been hustling for a long time

0:38:34.560 --> 0:38:36.440
<v Speaker 2>and this has been like our baby, and then the

0:38:36.440 --> 0:38:39.239
<v Speaker 2>retreat is our baby, Like we literally have kids with

0:38:39.320 --> 0:38:43.799
<v Speaker 2>an s and like we've just been Like I know,

0:38:43.840 --> 0:38:45.239
<v Speaker 2>we talk a lot, we talk to a lot of people,

0:38:45.280 --> 0:38:48.440
<v Speaker 2>we learn a lot of things. We're growing something, we're

0:38:48.440 --> 0:38:52.359
<v Speaker 2>growing humans, and we're trying to grow ourselves. But like

0:38:52.640 --> 0:38:56.799
<v Speaker 2>the embodiment, like have we integrated all that information? I

0:38:56.800 --> 0:38:58.279
<v Speaker 2>know we like said that a couple of years ago,

0:38:58.320 --> 0:39:02.040
<v Speaker 2>but I do feel like still I'm still catching up.

0:39:02.400 --> 0:39:03.880
<v Speaker 2>I do feel like I've done so much in the

0:39:03.960 --> 0:39:07.839
<v Speaker 2>last like eight nine years and now I'm like I'm

0:39:07.920 --> 0:39:11.320
<v Speaker 2>kind of like in shock, like I'm still like my

0:39:12.000 --> 0:39:14.400
<v Speaker 2>body is catching up with all, like my mind is

0:39:14.440 --> 0:39:16.600
<v Speaker 2>catching up with all that I've done, and like I'm

0:39:16.760 --> 0:39:19.440
<v Speaker 2>married and like we're talking about having a kid, and

0:39:19.480 --> 0:39:22.800
<v Speaker 2>like I'm safe. I'm realizing like in this new found

0:39:22.920 --> 0:39:29.000
<v Speaker 2>like safety, I am still somewhat like don't believe that

0:39:29.040 --> 0:39:34.239
<v Speaker 2>I'm safe, and just like really sitting with yourself and

0:39:34.280 --> 0:39:36.520
<v Speaker 2>it's like all that you know, like when you and

0:39:36.520 --> 0:39:39.280
<v Speaker 2>even with Orlando now like going back to work full time,

0:39:39.560 --> 0:39:41.960
<v Speaker 2>I have more time by myself. But it's interesting to

0:39:42.000 --> 0:39:44.840
<v Speaker 2>observe yourself when you're not in the presence with other people,

0:39:44.880 --> 0:39:47.200
<v Speaker 2>when Luna's not there, when he's not there, when I've

0:39:47.239 --> 0:39:49.760
<v Speaker 2>been in the presence of other people for so long,

0:39:50.360 --> 0:39:52.440
<v Speaker 2>and like just the way and the way like I

0:39:52.480 --> 0:39:55.439
<v Speaker 2>won't eat oh like la la la la la la

0:39:55.560 --> 0:39:58.279
<v Speaker 2>unless I'm feeding someone else and then I'm last like

0:39:58.520 --> 0:40:02.000
<v Speaker 2>until I'm fucking starving. I'm gon kill somebody, And I'm like, well,

0:40:02.040 --> 0:40:03.560
<v Speaker 2>what is that? Like why would I just wake up

0:40:03.560 --> 0:40:06.319
<v Speaker 2>and feel like activated to feed myself or to do

0:40:06.360 --> 0:40:08.279
<v Speaker 2>this or like it's and even the other day I

0:40:08.320 --> 0:40:09.400
<v Speaker 2>was like asking Luna, do you want to go to

0:40:09.440 --> 0:40:10.960
<v Speaker 2>the park with me? And she's like no, because she's

0:40:11.000 --> 0:40:12.560
<v Speaker 2>a teen, like a preteen that doesn't want to do

0:40:12.560 --> 0:40:14.520
<v Speaker 2>shit even though it's a beautiful day outside, and like whatever,

0:40:14.640 --> 0:40:17.120
<v Speaker 2>I was realized I'm super sensitive and she's super black

0:40:17.160 --> 0:40:19.319
<v Speaker 2>and white, and I'm like whatever, you're so mean and

0:40:19.360 --> 0:40:22.640
<v Speaker 2>she's like I'm fine, like okay, and even Orlando like

0:40:22.640 --> 0:40:24.000
<v Speaker 2>I'm playing video games, I want to go to the park,

0:40:24.000 --> 0:40:24.839
<v Speaker 2>and I was like, fuck you guys.

0:40:24.880 --> 0:40:26.080
<v Speaker 1>I didn't say that. I was like, I'm going to

0:40:26.120 --> 0:40:26.840
<v Speaker 1>park alone.

0:40:27.000 --> 0:40:28.480
<v Speaker 2>So I went to the park lones and I was like,

0:40:28.800 --> 0:40:31.400
<v Speaker 2>I like me at the park alone actually, but generally

0:40:31.520 --> 0:40:33.239
<v Speaker 2>like unless it was like, hey, you guys are so

0:40:33.360 --> 0:40:35.600
<v Speaker 2>mean to me, I wouldn't have maybe packed my shit

0:40:35.680 --> 0:40:39.560
<v Speaker 2>up and gone. But just feeling activated to just go

0:40:39.640 --> 0:40:43.560
<v Speaker 2>do some shit alone, you know, like and and I

0:40:43.880 --> 0:40:47.280
<v Speaker 2>think there's not a morning. But like, I am married,

0:40:47.400 --> 0:40:49.680
<v Speaker 2>I do live with a child, that's all, you know.

0:40:49.800 --> 0:40:51.239
<v Speaker 2>I am gonna have another kid that's gonna be their

0:40:51.239 --> 0:40:55.239
<v Speaker 2>twenty four seven. I will never be alone again. I

0:40:55.280 --> 0:41:01.640
<v Speaker 2>will never live alone again. That's true. I mean it

0:41:01.680 --> 0:41:03.040
<v Speaker 2>isn't true because I feel like I could have another

0:41:03.040 --> 0:41:05.759
<v Speaker 2>house somewhere. Yeah, but I just like it's just like

0:41:05.880 --> 0:41:08.600
<v Speaker 2>taking I think I'm just in a time where I'm like,

0:41:09.360 --> 0:41:12.399
<v Speaker 2>when everything stops, what is there?

0:41:12.800 --> 0:41:13.960
<v Speaker 1>What's left? Who is there?

0:41:14.000 --> 0:41:16.120
<v Speaker 2>Like and even like in creativity, like you said, like

0:41:16.360 --> 0:41:18.520
<v Speaker 2>when there's so much going on, it's hard, like I

0:41:18.520 --> 0:41:21.279
<v Speaker 2>feel like out of ideas. I'm like I want to

0:41:21.480 --> 0:41:24.239
<v Speaker 2>I feel like not uninspired because I'm inspired, but like

0:41:24.239 --> 0:41:28.000
<v Speaker 2>almost like uninspired and over expired, Like I feel over inspired,

0:41:28.040 --> 0:41:29.440
<v Speaker 2>like the Internet.

0:41:29.200 --> 0:41:31.840
<v Speaker 1>Unexpired and over expired is amazing.

0:41:32.760 --> 0:41:36.440
<v Speaker 2>I love that overspired, like the Internet is. There's so

0:41:36.560 --> 0:41:37.680
<v Speaker 2>much inspiring things.

0:41:37.680 --> 0:41:39.399
<v Speaker 1>I've overspired. There's too much shit.

0:41:40.280 --> 0:41:42.520
<v Speaker 2>I'm screenshotting shit all day and I never look at

0:41:42.520 --> 0:41:44.560
<v Speaker 2>it again. I'm just like I actually want it to

0:41:44.600 --> 0:41:46.320
<v Speaker 2>go i want it to go away. I want to

0:41:46.360 --> 0:41:51.040
<v Speaker 2>have like thoughts that are not impeded by reels or

0:41:51.080 --> 0:41:54.319
<v Speaker 2>post or people, and like even to like even to

0:41:54.360 --> 0:41:55.759
<v Speaker 2>the point like I have so many friends, Like a

0:41:55.760 --> 0:41:58.320
<v Speaker 2>lot of people call me for things that I didn't

0:41:58.640 --> 0:42:00.680
<v Speaker 2>have to be called for, and I and I love

0:42:00.719 --> 0:42:01.439
<v Speaker 2>being there for people.

0:42:01.440 --> 0:42:04.200
<v Speaker 1>But then sometimes I'm like, you don't have to answer.

0:42:04.320 --> 0:42:06.400
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I'm realizing, like, oh my god, you don't.

0:42:06.280 --> 0:42:10.520
<v Speaker 1>Have to answer, and you can take phone technology breaks,

0:42:10.560 --> 0:42:14.719
<v Speaker 1>like you know, you just have to those It's it's important.

0:42:14.800 --> 0:42:18.040
<v Speaker 1>I mean, those are the things that I have other anxieties,

0:42:18.080 --> 0:42:19.960
<v Speaker 1>Like those things I don't have problems with. I can

0:42:20.080 --> 0:42:22.120
<v Speaker 1>fucking not answer moy the fucking phone call real quick.

0:42:22.440 --> 0:42:24.960
<v Speaker 1>I can say, hey, I'm deleting the app. Figure it out.

0:42:25.000 --> 0:42:27.120
<v Speaker 1>I don't know. But then there's other parts of me

0:42:27.280 --> 0:42:33.320
<v Speaker 1>that are like people pleasing or overwhelmed or super hyper focused,

0:42:33.320 --> 0:42:34.719
<v Speaker 1>and then all my energy goes in one place and

0:42:34.719 --> 0:42:38.440
<v Speaker 1>then I'm exhausted everywhere else. Yeah, you know, like it's

0:42:38.200 --> 0:42:40.880
<v Speaker 1>it's it's finding the ballace, and it isn't I think,

0:42:41.120 --> 0:42:43.759
<v Speaker 1>And actually I don't think. I know because I have,

0:42:44.480 --> 0:42:46.719
<v Speaker 1>you know, even though like I haven't gone on a

0:42:46.760 --> 0:42:49.640
<v Speaker 1>solo trip. I've gone on a lot of trips, either

0:42:49.719 --> 0:42:52.480
<v Speaker 1>with just one person or like when I was touring

0:42:52.480 --> 0:42:54.440
<v Speaker 1>with Macy, I kind of was alone, like I was

0:42:54.480 --> 0:42:56.000
<v Speaker 1>working with her, but then I would be in a

0:42:56.000 --> 0:42:59.080
<v Speaker 1>city by myself trying to like figure it out. And

0:42:59.719 --> 0:43:02.080
<v Speaker 1>what I've learned in those environments is like when you

0:43:02.160 --> 0:43:05.480
<v Speaker 1>put yourself in just foreign spaces, whether that's even just

0:43:05.600 --> 0:43:07.680
<v Speaker 1>turning your phone off can feel like a foreign space,

0:43:08.160 --> 0:43:11.560
<v Speaker 1>like you will find something over there, you will come

0:43:11.600 --> 0:43:14.160
<v Speaker 1>back with something, maybe not the first time, but like

0:43:14.600 --> 0:43:18.879
<v Speaker 1>just shifting and like taking away literally something that is

0:43:19.239 --> 0:43:22.480
<v Speaker 1>just doesn't feel good or is like feel semi addictive,

0:43:22.560 --> 0:43:24.440
<v Speaker 1>Like you're like I kind of feel like I you know,

0:43:24.800 --> 0:43:28.520
<v Speaker 1>like those things make a difference and it's just like

0:43:28.760 --> 0:43:33.720
<v Speaker 1>being aware of them. So yeah, friends don't answer.

0:43:34.480 --> 0:43:37.239
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I'm just like I can't believe it's taken thirty

0:43:37.280 --> 0:43:40.239
<v Speaker 2>eight years to be like, oh, okay, I'm overwhelmed. Yeah,

0:43:41.400 --> 0:43:43.280
<v Speaker 2>i think I've hit my I think I've hit my limit.

0:43:43.320 --> 0:43:45.720
<v Speaker 2>I think I'm on And and also just like accept

0:43:45.760 --> 0:43:50.759
<v Speaker 2>that too, like it's okay to feel overwhelmed. Yeah, it's

0:43:50.800 --> 0:43:53.560
<v Speaker 2>okay to to pivot and be like, Okay, I'm putting

0:43:53.600 --> 0:43:55.799
<v Speaker 2>this down now, I don't have to carry this.

0:43:56.000 --> 0:43:59.719
<v Speaker 1>I told Ashley that my friend actually that I was.

0:43:59.760 --> 0:44:01.640
<v Speaker 1>I was like, I'm debating whether I should bring my

0:44:01.680 --> 0:44:04.440
<v Speaker 1>computer or not, like, bitch, shut up, bring your motherfucking computer.

0:44:04.480 --> 0:44:07.480
<v Speaker 1>I was like, what is life before bringing your computer

0:44:07.600 --> 0:44:08.240
<v Speaker 1>on a trip?

0:44:08.320 --> 0:44:10.480
<v Speaker 2>Well, that's the thing, is like I'm like, why do.

0:44:10.480 --> 0:44:12.200
<v Speaker 1>I have to bring my computer? I don't want to

0:44:12.800 --> 0:44:14.759
<v Speaker 1>and and and then she made me feel bad, and

0:44:14.760 --> 0:44:15.920
<v Speaker 1>then I was like, well should I? And I was like,

0:44:15.920 --> 0:44:18.200
<v Speaker 1>what if I get an idea that requires my computer?

0:44:18.239 --> 0:44:20.239
<v Speaker 1>I'm like, what did you do before computers when you

0:44:20.280 --> 0:44:20.680
<v Speaker 1>had ideas?

0:44:20.800 --> 0:44:26.919
<v Speaker 2>You know what I want that a friend had that came, uh, desert.

0:44:28.160 --> 0:44:32.080
<v Speaker 1>My cousin, No, who's coming, oh, Dominique, Dominique. She had

0:44:32.719 --> 0:44:34.560
<v Speaker 1>a typewriter. Yeah, she bought it out here.

0:44:34.719 --> 0:44:36.279
<v Speaker 2>I know, she showed me. I'm like, I want one

0:44:36.320 --> 0:44:39.000
<v Speaker 2>of those. There's like a typewriter, but I it took

0:44:39.000 --> 0:44:41.160
<v Speaker 2>me back. I used to type on a typewriter as

0:44:41.200 --> 0:44:44.120
<v Speaker 2>a kid and I loved it. And now I was like,

0:44:44.760 --> 0:44:46.920
<v Speaker 2>I forgot that I'd done that. It's almost like when

0:44:46.960 --> 0:44:50.239
<v Speaker 2>you remove one sense, everything else will become more.

0:44:50.120 --> 0:44:54.000
<v Speaker 1>Like yeah, yeah, that's so true, more heightened.

0:44:53.719 --> 0:44:56.160
<v Speaker 2>More heightened. So it's like if you do remove your phone,

0:44:56.360 --> 0:44:58.560
<v Speaker 2>like all the ideas will start coming.

0:44:58.719 --> 0:45:00.520
<v Speaker 1>In a different and a more productive way.

0:45:00.800 --> 0:45:02.600
<v Speaker 2>And I'm more like, I feel like in a more

0:45:03.360 --> 0:45:08.600
<v Speaker 2>authentic way, like because we're so overspired by the Internet

0:45:08.719 --> 0:45:12.000
<v Speaker 2>and like by like it's it's that's my that's my

0:45:12.040 --> 0:45:17.800
<v Speaker 2>only like reluctance outside of the fucking globe, Like AI

0:45:18.280 --> 0:45:21.839
<v Speaker 2>to me, feels like taking the humanness out of creativity

0:45:22.239 --> 0:45:23.960
<v Speaker 2>and like giving it away to this machine that I

0:45:23.960 --> 0:45:25.080
<v Speaker 2>don't know what you're gonna do with it. And then

0:45:25.080 --> 0:45:27.840
<v Speaker 2>you're gonna have all our creativities because you've like taken

0:45:27.880 --> 0:45:30.719
<v Speaker 2>it from everywhere, data from everywhere, and it's like and

0:45:30.760 --> 0:45:32.920
<v Speaker 2>then there's gonna be also like a co creating with

0:45:33.000 --> 0:45:36.000
<v Speaker 2>AI that I don't fuck with, Like I want to

0:45:36.040 --> 0:45:38.000
<v Speaker 2>be able to turn this shit off and be like,

0:45:38.040 --> 0:45:40.600
<v Speaker 2>oh that's a good idea by itself, not because so

0:45:40.680 --> 0:45:43.400
<v Speaker 2>and so's real inspired me. And then I asked chat

0:45:43.480 --> 0:45:46.080
<v Speaker 2>gibt and I tell them three words of my own,

0:45:46.200 --> 0:45:48.600
<v Speaker 2>and now I have this bomb idea, like I want

0:45:48.600 --> 0:45:51.239
<v Speaker 2>to be like I want to I just want to

0:45:51.280 --> 0:45:53.759
<v Speaker 2>be disconnected so that I can connect for real, like

0:45:53.920 --> 0:45:56.040
<v Speaker 2>see the Like I'm already a person's like oh, look

0:45:56.040 --> 0:45:57.920
<v Speaker 2>at the flower. Let's look at the tree. But like

0:45:58.400 --> 0:46:00.759
<v Speaker 2>you realize when you put some shit like for real,

0:46:00.840 --> 0:46:02.560
<v Speaker 2>you're like, oh there.

0:46:02.400 --> 0:46:05.000
<v Speaker 1>I am, Oh the flowers pink. Oh there, it's not

0:46:05.040 --> 0:46:07.320
<v Speaker 1>just look at the flower. Oh it has a green stem?

0:46:07.520 --> 0:46:10.680
<v Speaker 1>Oh wow, leaves, Like you start to notice the things

0:46:10.719 --> 0:46:13.360
<v Speaker 1>that you generally just bypass.

0:46:13.040 --> 0:46:16.640
<v Speaker 2>And how much we're bypassing them. And this this era

0:46:17.560 --> 0:46:19.719
<v Speaker 2>more than it's more than any time, and it's not,

0:46:19.840 --> 0:46:22.400
<v Speaker 2>it's not it's not going to go backwards ever. So

0:46:22.440 --> 0:46:26.480
<v Speaker 2>we we literally have to disconnect, unplug ourselves. We have

0:46:26.560 --> 0:46:28.799
<v Speaker 2>to have the discipline unplug ourselves or else we will

0:46:28.800 --> 0:46:30.839
<v Speaker 2>get wrapped up in this addiction that we don't even see.

0:46:30.880 --> 0:46:33.080
<v Speaker 2>Is like this is psychological warfare.

0:46:33.120 --> 0:46:35.879
<v Speaker 1>We're at war, like it's this is not a game.

0:46:36.360 --> 0:46:42.479
<v Speaker 2>They are literally they're literally like manipulating how you feel

0:46:42.480 --> 0:46:46.239
<v Speaker 2>on a daily basis, while also taking data about who

0:46:46.280 --> 0:46:49.239
<v Speaker 2>you are as a profile, like I'm I just I

0:46:49.320 --> 0:46:54.480
<v Speaker 2>don't want to attach to this this world in this way.

0:46:54.600 --> 0:46:57.520
<v Speaker 2>I consciously want to be like, please get this shit

0:46:57.560 --> 0:46:57.960
<v Speaker 2>away from me.

0:46:58.200 --> 0:47:01.760
<v Speaker 1>I think it's now, it's more than ever. The most

0:47:01.800 --> 0:47:05.320
<v Speaker 1>important thing is to be in not even discipline with yourself,

0:47:05.320 --> 0:47:08.640
<v Speaker 1>but in devotion of yourself, like truth, like your real

0:47:08.680 --> 0:47:11.560
<v Speaker 1>true self, and like giving that time and space for

0:47:11.640 --> 0:47:14.640
<v Speaker 1>you to do that, because that's the whole ploy is

0:47:14.719 --> 0:47:19.440
<v Speaker 1>disconnecting ourselves, disconnecting us from ourselves, disconnecting us from nature,

0:47:19.520 --> 0:47:24.120
<v Speaker 1>disconnecting us from connection, just disconnecting us in general. That's

0:47:24.160 --> 0:47:27.279
<v Speaker 1>that's the agenda. And so it's it's it's there, and

0:47:27.320 --> 0:47:29.439
<v Speaker 1>it's there, and it's really no, we can't get away

0:47:29.440 --> 0:47:32.200
<v Speaker 1>from it. We can't. We can, but we can't. So

0:47:32.280 --> 0:47:34.360
<v Speaker 1>we have to be intentional and so that's part of it.

0:47:34.400 --> 0:47:36.240
<v Speaker 1>I feel like I've been in like a two year

0:47:36.640 --> 0:47:40.520
<v Speaker 1>journey of like figuring out what devotion looks like in

0:47:40.560 --> 0:47:44.080
<v Speaker 1>my life, like being devoted in a relationship, being devoted

0:47:44.160 --> 0:47:47.840
<v Speaker 1>to like my wellness practices, like being like devoted to

0:47:47.920 --> 0:47:50.799
<v Speaker 1>my daughter, like and all at different spectrums, and like

0:47:51.200 --> 0:47:54.520
<v Speaker 1>I'm figuring out the balance of what actually makes me

0:47:54.560 --> 0:47:57.440
<v Speaker 1>feel good. And it's been fun and it's been really hard,

0:47:57.719 --> 0:48:01.239
<v Speaker 1>and it's been sad, and it's been fun and it's

0:48:01.280 --> 0:48:04.719
<v Speaker 1>been emotional. But I feel like, more than ever, like

0:48:04.760 --> 0:48:06.560
<v Speaker 1>that's the ship we need to be studying. We can

0:48:06.600 --> 0:48:10.000
<v Speaker 1>study all the every other thing in the world they

0:48:10.000 --> 0:48:12.439
<v Speaker 1>want us to distract ourselves with, but like it's time

0:48:12.480 --> 0:48:14.640
<v Speaker 1>to like understand what you need in order to just

0:48:14.680 --> 0:48:17.120
<v Speaker 1>stay connected to yourself, because if not, you're just gonna

0:48:17.160 --> 0:48:20.000
<v Speaker 1>be lost and you're just gonna be like a robot.

0:48:20.080 --> 0:48:22.879
<v Speaker 1>You'll eventually just be one of these lambs that are

0:48:23.080 --> 0:48:26.759
<v Speaker 1>just whatever they say. It's like there's already people that

0:48:26.800 --> 0:48:29.920
<v Speaker 1>have already been programmed, like they're done. It's done, like

0:48:30.080 --> 0:48:32.680
<v Speaker 1>they're clicked off NPCs, you know what I'm saying. Like

0:48:32.760 --> 0:48:37.960
<v Speaker 1>it's and and this type of technology is like the

0:48:38.040 --> 0:48:42.560
<v Speaker 1>last piece of the puzzle. I think before we either

0:48:42.600 --> 0:48:45.759
<v Speaker 1>totally implode as a society, or maybe God comes out

0:48:45.800 --> 0:48:48.279
<v Speaker 1>it takes us out, or we awaken. Something happens and

0:48:48.320 --> 0:48:49.600
<v Speaker 1>there's a mass awakening.

0:48:50.360 --> 0:48:53.720
<v Speaker 2>They keep saying that they're gonna they're gonna unplug us anyway,

0:48:53.760 --> 0:48:56.080
<v Speaker 2>like there's gonna be just like a book, complete blackout

0:48:56.120 --> 0:48:58.080
<v Speaker 2>and people are gonna lose their fucking shit.

0:48:58.520 --> 0:49:00.880
<v Speaker 1>Like unplugg us from the techniqulgy. So there will be

0:49:00.960 --> 0:49:03.960
<v Speaker 1>no have you seen Bigonia. No, there'll be no electricity.

0:49:03.960 --> 0:49:04.800
<v Speaker 1>There'll be no Internet.

0:49:06.000 --> 0:49:08.640
<v Speaker 2>That would be really great. We need electricity, babe. I

0:49:08.680 --> 0:49:09.840
<v Speaker 2>thought about this a lot of times.

0:49:10.680 --> 0:49:11.880
<v Speaker 1>What about solar power?

0:49:12.400 --> 0:49:14.400
<v Speaker 2>I don't think it can keep a refrigerator on.

0:49:14.760 --> 0:49:16.000
<v Speaker 1>Solar powers?

0:49:16.040 --> 0:49:18.879
<v Speaker 2>Again, the sun, it's not the sun might be fake.

0:49:19.000 --> 0:49:21.239
<v Speaker 2>We're all vitamin D deficient. I don't know what's going on.

0:49:21.840 --> 0:49:24.759
<v Speaker 2>I am you are too. Everyone's vitamin D deficient. It's

0:49:24.760 --> 0:49:25.640
<v Speaker 2>a huge epidemic.

0:49:25.800 --> 0:49:27.080
<v Speaker 1>How do you know Vitamin D deficient.

0:49:27.160 --> 0:49:27.759
<v Speaker 2>Everybody is.

0:49:27.840 --> 0:49:39.040
<v Speaker 1>It's a thing. Okay, check your charts, Okay, anyway, yeah,

0:49:39.560 --> 0:49:41.920
<v Speaker 1>you know, and then I'm thinking like and then I'm

0:49:41.920 --> 0:49:44.320
<v Speaker 1>gonna have another kid that's gonna take me even further

0:49:44.600 --> 0:49:45.799
<v Speaker 1>away from like I need a moment.

0:49:46.600 --> 0:49:50.759
<v Speaker 2>I just need a moment to catch up with all,

0:49:51.239 --> 0:49:51.879
<v Speaker 2>like the light.

0:49:52.000 --> 0:49:54.000
<v Speaker 1>Might be might do that, bitch. The kid's gonna sit

0:49:54.080 --> 0:49:54.680
<v Speaker 1>your ass down.

0:49:55.920 --> 0:49:58.040
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I'm gonna be sitting down looking at your ass.

0:49:58.040 --> 0:50:00.200
<v Speaker 2>I need to look at me. I need to I

0:50:00.200 --> 0:50:02.319
<v Speaker 2>need to hold me, I need to rock me for

0:50:02.360 --> 0:50:06.520
<v Speaker 2>a second. Yeah, yeah, it's just yeah, the coming back

0:50:06.560 --> 0:50:11.080
<v Speaker 2>to yourself is you know, there's like a theory that

0:50:11.120 --> 0:50:13.320
<v Speaker 2>like every seven to ten years we go through different

0:50:13.440 --> 0:50:16.719
<v Speaker 2>life changes, different cycles. And I'm recognizing like yeah, like

0:50:17.760 --> 0:50:20.719
<v Speaker 2>thirty twenty eight, twenty nine, thirty and now we're at

0:50:20.719 --> 0:50:24.560
<v Speaker 2>like thirty seven, thirty thirty nine forty. Like I'm seeing

0:50:24.719 --> 0:50:27.840
<v Speaker 2>that there is just like an energetic shift. There's like

0:50:27.880 --> 0:50:31.320
<v Speaker 2>an awakening per se that happens that like just something

0:50:32.160 --> 0:50:33.920
<v Speaker 2>is you know, like you.

0:50:33.200 --> 0:50:35.120
<v Speaker 1>You really start to think about what you're giving your

0:50:35.200 --> 0:50:37.320
<v Speaker 1>energy to, yeah, and how much time you have.

0:50:37.560 --> 0:50:42.120
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, and what's pleasurable and really like what feels good

0:50:42.200 --> 0:50:47.520
<v Speaker 2>and like nourishing to yourself, and like, this doesn't feel good.

0:50:48.239 --> 0:50:52.799
<v Speaker 2>It doesn't feel nourishing. It feels like fast food. Yeah,

0:50:53.280 --> 0:50:56.960
<v Speaker 2>like like filling, but there's not a single nutrain in it.

0:50:58.239 --> 0:51:02.160
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I mean there's parts of technology that I appreciate.

0:51:02.600 --> 0:51:03.279
<v Speaker 1>I'm not gonna lie.

0:51:03.280 --> 0:51:05.200
<v Speaker 2>I mean, I love access to certain information.

0:51:05.320 --> 0:51:07.200
<v Speaker 1>I love people have access, but like I do, it's

0:51:07.200 --> 0:51:09.239
<v Speaker 1>not even with information, it's the level of connection that

0:51:09.320 --> 0:51:11.759
<v Speaker 1>I get to keep with people that I love. Like

0:51:12.320 --> 0:51:13.799
<v Speaker 1>if I didn't have a phone, I wouldn't be able

0:51:13.800 --> 0:51:17.479
<v Speaker 1>to communicate with someone who lives across the world and

0:51:17.840 --> 0:51:18.960
<v Speaker 1>without being in their presence.

0:51:19.040 --> 0:51:21.359
<v Speaker 2>Do you remember we used to just call people? Yeah,

0:51:21.480 --> 0:51:26.160
<v Speaker 2>phone a regular how landline? We could call people far away.

0:51:26.160 --> 0:51:27.960
<v Speaker 1>Oh so you're saying, okay, so the cell phone not

0:51:27.960 --> 0:51:31.000
<v Speaker 1>necessarily the phone? No the cell the cell phone? Okay

0:51:31.080 --> 0:51:33.200
<v Speaker 1>phone no? No? Oh no, yeah, bring regular Maybe I

0:51:33.200 --> 0:51:34.799
<v Speaker 1>should get it. Who did we know that had a

0:51:34.800 --> 0:51:38.719
<v Speaker 1>regular landline? Someone we know had one? That was I

0:51:38.760 --> 0:51:42.000
<v Speaker 1>with you when that happened and I was like, oh no,

0:51:42.040 --> 0:51:44.600
<v Speaker 1>it's it's my friend Debbie. Yeah, she has a landline.

0:51:45.160 --> 0:51:47.680
<v Speaker 2>Luna's grandma has landline. They I don't think they do

0:51:47.760 --> 0:51:50.399
<v Speaker 2>them anymore. I think when I moved in and asked

0:51:50.440 --> 0:51:52.759
<v Speaker 2>about it, really, I don't think they do it. I

0:51:52.760 --> 0:51:55.560
<v Speaker 2>don't even think the phone jack's work, which we need

0:51:55.600 --> 0:52:00.640
<v Speaker 2>to get satellite radio's bitch? And did I tell you

0:52:00.719 --> 0:52:04.520
<v Speaker 2>that I built the world my inn apocalyptic Amazon bag

0:52:04.920 --> 0:52:06.080
<v Speaker 2>and it was eight hundred dollars.

0:52:06.080 --> 0:52:07.960
<v Speaker 1>So I never pre said you guys, just do it.

0:52:08.760 --> 0:52:10.840
<v Speaker 1>I got little by little, I got like one.

0:52:10.719 --> 0:52:12.439
<v Speaker 2>Two satellite radios too.

0:52:12.480 --> 0:52:13.880
<v Speaker 1>I was like, you just buy. You don't have to

0:52:13.880 --> 0:52:16.080
<v Speaker 1>buy everything at once. Break it up, bitch.

0:52:16.160 --> 0:52:19.800
<v Speaker 2>My add is so intense that it's like I hyper focus.

0:52:19.840 --> 0:52:21.600
<v Speaker 2>I go extreme, that's all I can. And then I'm

0:52:21.640 --> 0:52:24.239
<v Speaker 2>like that's too much. And then I forget all about it.

0:52:24.239 --> 0:52:26.720
<v Speaker 2>And I was like, too much, overwhelming, seven hundred dollars,

0:52:27.040 --> 0:52:31.160
<v Speaker 2>I'll die, so yeah, and then yeah, add I think

0:52:31.160 --> 0:52:34.440
<v Speaker 2>it's like because I'm getting older and this phone is

0:52:34.480 --> 0:52:38.120
<v Speaker 2>not it's not contributing to my memory, to my fucking focus.

0:52:38.440 --> 0:52:40.120
<v Speaker 2>Like I'm always in a rush. And then I was like,

0:52:40.160 --> 0:52:42.680
<v Speaker 2>what the fuck are you rushing cleaning for? I'm like,

0:52:43.520 --> 0:52:46.400
<v Speaker 2>I don't know. He's like, are you slow down? He's like,

0:52:46.440 --> 0:52:47.560
<v Speaker 2>what do you think you get in trouble if the

0:52:47.560 --> 0:52:49.239
<v Speaker 2>house is not clean. When I come home and I'm

0:52:49.280 --> 0:52:52.120
<v Speaker 2>like no, He's like, and I have to be like,

0:52:52.760 --> 0:52:55.239
<v Speaker 2>everything is fine, bitch, everything.

0:52:56.680 --> 0:52:59.960
<v Speaker 1>Use all your practices. Breathe the breaths, smowan in the moment,

0:53:01.960 --> 0:53:05.600
<v Speaker 1>be present, know that everything's fine. You're a good wife.

0:53:06.200 --> 0:53:11.240
<v Speaker 1>You're a good housewife, your great housewife. I decided that if.

0:53:11.040 --> 0:53:14.600
<v Speaker 2>I wear a housewife clothes, sexy housewife clothes, then maybe

0:53:14.600 --> 0:53:16.840
<v Speaker 2>I'll be more motivated to do the dishes or like

0:53:16.920 --> 0:53:19.640
<v Speaker 2>be nice, because I realize sometimes I'm not that nice

0:53:20.000 --> 0:53:22.040
<v Speaker 2>for no reason. I'm just kind of like, you can't

0:53:22.040 --> 0:53:23.239
<v Speaker 2>be a bitch in a housewife dress.

0:53:23.400 --> 0:53:25.400
<v Speaker 1>Not really. Look at these shoes. You can't be a

0:53:25.400 --> 0:53:27.440
<v Speaker 1>bitch of these shoes. You just want to go like

0:53:28.040 --> 0:53:29.880
<v Speaker 1>those are kind of some I can see bitchy. I

0:53:29.920 --> 0:53:34.160
<v Speaker 1>can see people being bitches in those shoes. But you

0:53:34.239 --> 0:53:41.280
<v Speaker 1>could be bitchy to your husband. You know, you know it. Sweats.

0:53:41.320 --> 0:53:43.920
<v Speaker 2>Sweats is your bitchy most Yeah, sweats is like you

0:53:43.920 --> 0:53:45.480
<v Speaker 2>don't have to go to the park with me, motherfucker

0:53:45.840 --> 0:53:48.359
<v Speaker 2>fuck you. I'm getting my own parks ship. I'm gonna

0:53:48.480 --> 0:53:51.120
<v Speaker 2>I'm getting in a sandwich. And then they get there,

0:53:51.160 --> 0:53:52.440
<v Speaker 2>I'm like, why a you guys here? Who told you

0:53:52.480 --> 0:53:55.200
<v Speaker 2>guys to come to the park with think they came anyway?

0:53:54.440 --> 0:53:58.200
<v Speaker 2>They felt bad after and then Lana's like, I'm a

0:53:58.200 --> 0:53:59.840
<v Speaker 2>bad example. Now Lunda doesn't want to go to the

0:53:59.840 --> 0:54:02.560
<v Speaker 2>park because he's up there playing fucking video games. But

0:54:02.600 --> 0:54:04.520
<v Speaker 2>then we came and it was fun and we raced.

0:54:05.440 --> 0:54:08.960
<v Speaker 2>But yeah, I was like, maybe if I wear and

0:54:08.960 --> 0:54:10.879
<v Speaker 2>then I was like, I'm such a bitch. Maybe maybe

0:54:10.880 --> 0:54:12.400
<v Speaker 2>he likes me because I kind of remind him of

0:54:12.480 --> 0:54:13.839
<v Speaker 2>his mom. And then I was like, I can't tell

0:54:13.920 --> 0:54:17.680
<v Speaker 2>him that. I just gotta change. So then I was like, okay, well,

0:54:17.680 --> 0:54:19.680
<v Speaker 2>if I wear a housewife clothes, maybe I'll be nicer,

0:54:20.040 --> 0:54:22.080
<v Speaker 2>Maybe i'll do the dishes more, maybe I'll maybe I'll

0:54:22.160 --> 0:54:25.239
<v Speaker 2>like you gotta you gotta play the part and then

0:54:25.280 --> 0:54:28.360
<v Speaker 2>become the person. So I'll tell you how it goes.

0:54:29.160 --> 0:54:35.560
<v Speaker 1>I'm looking forward to it. Do you have any bad choices?

0:54:35.600 --> 0:54:39.520
<v Speaker 1>This week? You asked me three times? What's nice? I'm

0:54:39.600 --> 0:54:43.319
<v Speaker 1>high I'll light that up again. What's the next one?

0:54:43.560 --> 0:54:48.280
<v Speaker 1>Oh my god? For his advice, there was an advice

0:54:48.440 --> 0:55:07.120
<v Speaker 1>question that was in the discord. If you haven't joined

0:55:07.120 --> 0:55:11.319
<v Speaker 1>our discord, yet, make sure you join discord. We have

0:55:11.520 --> 0:55:14.040
<v Speaker 1>a lot of people in here just talking their shit

0:55:14.520 --> 0:55:17.359
<v Speaker 1>and we're talking our shit, and we're thearing the shit

0:55:17.640 --> 0:55:23.440
<v Speaker 1>and they saying stuff and it's pretty entertaining. Let me see.

0:55:23.760 --> 0:55:32.319
<v Speaker 1>Uh ye, sometimes the channels disappear and I can't find them.

0:55:32.719 --> 0:55:37.480
<v Speaker 2>Well, if you guys have nothing to do Juneteenth, when

0:55:37.520 --> 0:55:39.120
<v Speaker 2>does this come out?

0:55:40.320 --> 0:55:43.279
<v Speaker 1>It says you've caught an ultra rare error. What the

0:55:43.320 --> 0:55:45.760
<v Speaker 1>fuck are you saying an ultra rare error?

0:55:46.960 --> 0:55:51.360
<v Speaker 2>You guys, If you have no plans on Juneteenth, I

0:55:51.400 --> 0:55:56.399
<v Speaker 2>am co hosting a play party Matrix themed with the

0:55:56.400 --> 0:56:01.440
<v Speaker 2>play Get Tested, get an interview, do your application so

0:56:01.480 --> 0:56:04.040
<v Speaker 2>you can come play. It's from eight to four am,

0:56:04.120 --> 0:56:07.919
<v Speaker 2>so you'll have plenty of time. The cloth doors close

0:56:07.960 --> 0:56:10.520
<v Speaker 2>at ten am. There's no pressure to do anything. It's

0:56:10.520 --> 0:56:13.120
<v Speaker 2>for the curious, it's for the pleasure, bullets, for the fun.

0:56:13.480 --> 0:56:17.359
<v Speaker 2>There's going to be open bar, performances and a DJ,

0:56:17.600 --> 0:56:19.880
<v Speaker 2>and of course I'll be there and my best Matrix

0:56:19.920 --> 0:56:22.960
<v Speaker 2>themed outfit. So if this seems like something you want

0:56:22.960 --> 0:56:24.840
<v Speaker 2>to do when you're the Los Angeles area, click the

0:56:24.920 --> 0:56:29.520
<v Speaker 2>link in this description. The play Matrix, the play, the

0:56:29.560 --> 0:56:32.880
<v Speaker 2>play Oh shit.

0:56:34.000 --> 0:56:36.920
<v Speaker 1>Well, here is an advice question that actually goes along

0:56:36.960 --> 0:56:49.320
<v Speaker 1>with that with the play what what kind of routine

0:56:49.360 --> 0:56:51.280
<v Speaker 1>can I do to help me get to an orgasm

0:56:51.480 --> 0:56:54.760
<v Speaker 1>with without or with a partner. I always find myself

0:56:54.840 --> 0:56:57.400
<v Speaker 1>letting it be done when they're done, or like stopping

0:56:57.440 --> 0:57:00.239
<v Speaker 1>before I can get there, holding myself back. I'm not

0:57:00.239 --> 0:57:01.040
<v Speaker 1>sure what's holding me.

0:57:01.080 --> 0:57:07.879
<v Speaker 2>Back, presence, vulnerability. It is really hard to sometimes get

0:57:07.880 --> 0:57:10.920
<v Speaker 2>out of our heads and get out of fight or flight.

0:57:11.120 --> 0:57:13.280
<v Speaker 2>Like I said, for the hundredth time, the fucking phone

0:57:13.480 --> 0:57:15.759
<v Speaker 2>run a lot of channels, and I think sometimes people

0:57:15.760 --> 0:57:18.320
<v Speaker 2>don't romanticize the moment or like create it as a

0:57:19.080 --> 0:57:22.000
<v Speaker 2>like a devotion or a ritual, and I think sometimes

0:57:22.000 --> 0:57:25.280
<v Speaker 2>you have to slow down, maybe turn the phone off,

0:57:25.760 --> 0:57:28.560
<v Speaker 2>put on a playlist that's at least an hour long,

0:57:29.040 --> 0:57:32.080
<v Speaker 2>something that you want to hear, maybe like incense, a candle,

0:57:32.160 --> 0:57:35.400
<v Speaker 2>something you're gonna smell, something like to drink, like just

0:57:35.480 --> 0:57:39.280
<v Speaker 2>like entice all of your senses and like make love

0:57:39.320 --> 0:57:45.360
<v Speaker 2>to yourself and breathe and just like like enter the

0:57:45.440 --> 0:57:49.880
<v Speaker 2>masturbation as if it's a meditation, and like put your

0:57:49.920 --> 0:57:51.880
<v Speaker 2>hand on your yoni, put your hand on your heart,

0:57:51.960 --> 0:57:56.160
<v Speaker 2>and just like take a fucking beat bitch, and like

0:57:56.240 --> 0:57:58.880
<v Speaker 2>don't go straight to the rose and like and then

0:57:58.960 --> 0:58:01.200
<v Speaker 2>come and then fall asleep and go on your way.

0:58:01.640 --> 0:58:03.400
<v Speaker 2>But just like kind of take a moment, turn on

0:58:03.440 --> 0:58:06.400
<v Speaker 2>some sexy music, maybe put something sexy on. If you're

0:58:06.400 --> 0:58:08.640
<v Speaker 2>with the partner, take a minute to stare into each

0:58:08.680 --> 0:58:11.840
<v Speaker 2>other's eyes. This is like the like the most epic

0:58:11.920 --> 0:58:14.959
<v Speaker 2>rese I know it sounds cheesy, but like just taking

0:58:14.960 --> 0:58:17.760
<v Speaker 2>a moment to like connect to your partner and breathe

0:58:17.760 --> 0:58:21.600
<v Speaker 2>together and stare into each other's eyes for fucking one minute.

0:58:21.800 --> 0:58:25.160
<v Speaker 2>It makes a huge difference when it comes to just connecting, arguing,

0:58:25.240 --> 0:58:28.240
<v Speaker 2>love making. And you could do this with yourself in

0:58:28.280 --> 0:58:31.280
<v Speaker 2>the mirror two, which is also makes for good love

0:58:31.320 --> 0:58:36.360
<v Speaker 2>making and just you know, adorn yourself and give yourself compliments.

0:58:36.480 --> 0:58:39.200
<v Speaker 2>And actually, when you place your hand on your heart,

0:58:39.280 --> 0:58:44.080
<v Speaker 2>talk to your pussy, see who's home, See how that feels.

0:58:44.200 --> 0:58:47.200
<v Speaker 2>And if you have to forgive her, if you have

0:58:47.240 --> 0:58:50.280
<v Speaker 2>to love on her, just do the things that you

0:58:51.360 --> 0:58:53.560
<v Speaker 2>would like someone else to do to you. But mostly

0:58:53.600 --> 0:58:57.880
<v Speaker 2>I feel like people have a hard time orgasming because

0:58:57.920 --> 0:59:00.920
<v Speaker 2>they have a hard time being vulnerable and like literally

0:59:01.040 --> 0:59:08.200
<v Speaker 2>just relaxing and write and regulating their nervous system and

0:59:08.200 --> 0:59:11.040
<v Speaker 2>getting out of their heads. So just take a moment,

0:59:11.640 --> 0:59:16.720
<v Speaker 2>you know, to breathe, ignite your senses. Take the full

0:59:17.600 --> 0:59:22.560
<v Speaker 2>sixty minutes. Don't uninterrupted and romanticize the masturbation.

0:59:23.480 --> 0:59:28.560
<v Speaker 1>Amen, put it on a timer, and know that you

0:59:28.640 --> 0:59:30.560
<v Speaker 1>might not get it right the first time, you know

0:59:30.600 --> 0:59:33.240
<v Speaker 1>what I mean. Might get distracted, Like you're gonna get distracted.

0:59:33.280 --> 0:59:36.120
<v Speaker 1>You might you might feel uncomfortable like all that stuff

0:59:36.160 --> 0:59:38.840
<v Speaker 1>like can feel uncomfortable for someone if you've never done that,

0:59:39.240 --> 0:59:41.720
<v Speaker 1>you can you start to observe yourself in the ways

0:59:41.720 --> 0:59:44.840
<v Speaker 1>that you try to, like walk away from things, or like,

0:59:44.920 --> 0:59:46.840
<v Speaker 1>oh that's too much, I need to do that, or

0:59:46.880 --> 0:59:48.520
<v Speaker 1>fuck it, let me just put the fucking porn on,

0:59:48.680 --> 0:59:51.040
<v Speaker 1>or uh, fuck it. Some of my hands are I

0:59:51.080 --> 0:59:52.840
<v Speaker 1>have grow I'm masturbated with my hands in gears. Fuck

0:59:52.840 --> 0:59:55.440
<v Speaker 1>the hands. I need the like you can reset your body.

0:59:55.480 --> 0:59:58.280
<v Speaker 1>We have everything that we need right here, Like everything

0:59:58.320 --> 1:00:01.160
<v Speaker 1>that we need we have right here. Possess you don't

1:00:01.240 --> 1:00:05.040
<v Speaker 1>need necessarily outside external forces. Yes, they feel good, but

1:00:05.080 --> 1:00:09.080
<v Speaker 1>I do think that it's important for to build connection

1:00:09.640 --> 1:00:12.560
<v Speaker 1>with what you have there. You go with what you have,

1:00:13.840 --> 1:00:19.200
<v Speaker 1>especially if you feel like you've you're blocking yourself from something.

1:00:20.600 --> 1:00:24.120
<v Speaker 1>I also remember like when I like the for orgasm orgasming,

1:00:24.240 --> 1:00:27.240
<v Speaker 1>and then like the resistance of it, Like there's a

1:00:27.280 --> 1:00:29.960
<v Speaker 1>lot of shame there too. There's shame and feeling like

1:00:30.000 --> 1:00:32.400
<v Speaker 1>maybe someone has embarrassed you. You think you're going to

1:00:32.480 --> 1:00:35.320
<v Speaker 1>pee on people. There's so many reasons why, like people

1:00:35.440 --> 1:00:39.720
<v Speaker 1>feel like they block themselves. So really, I think trying

1:00:39.760 --> 1:00:44.680
<v Speaker 1>to understand where that comes from and releasing that and

1:00:44.720 --> 1:00:45.600
<v Speaker 1>acknowledging it.

1:00:45.720 --> 1:00:49.440
<v Speaker 2>And also recognizing that in these in this quiet moment,

1:00:49.520 --> 1:00:51.520
<v Speaker 2>when you do start to do this, it could bring

1:00:51.640 --> 1:00:54.080
<v Speaker 2>up things emotions. It's going to bring up emotions like

1:00:54.120 --> 1:00:55.920
<v Speaker 2>why haven't I done this before? Why don't I have

1:00:55.960 --> 1:00:59.480
<v Speaker 2>words to give to my pussy with? Like there are

1:00:59.560 --> 1:01:03.400
<v Speaker 2>a lot like in the quiet of it all, I

1:01:03.440 --> 1:01:08.880
<v Speaker 2>think there is the like revelation of avoidance. If you

1:01:08.920 --> 1:01:11.480
<v Speaker 2>have avoided something or yourself for a long time, when

1:01:11.520 --> 1:01:13.720
<v Speaker 2>you finally quiet down and kind of start to connect,

1:01:13.760 --> 1:01:16.720
<v Speaker 2>it can be overwhelming. A lot of us have numbed,

1:01:16.760 --> 1:01:18.160
<v Speaker 2>a lot of us are just moving. A lot of

1:01:18.280 --> 1:01:22.160
<v Speaker 2>us have had like sexual fucking trauma and non sexual trauma.

1:01:22.160 --> 1:01:24.720
<v Speaker 2>But it lives there. And so if you haven't addressed it,

1:01:24.760 --> 1:01:27.400
<v Speaker 2>If you haven't taken the time to, you know, just

1:01:27.400 --> 1:01:29.919
<v Speaker 2>address yourself, it can be overwhelming, especially for women, because

1:01:29.920 --> 1:01:32.480
<v Speaker 2>there is just a lot of shame associated with our

1:01:32.560 --> 1:01:36.280
<v Speaker 2>pusseas in general. So I'm experiencing that right now, like

1:01:36.280 --> 1:01:37.960
<v Speaker 2>which is also feels like we talk about this a lot,

1:01:38.000 --> 1:01:40.320
<v Speaker 2>but like a delayed response, Like I'm experiencing a lot

1:01:40.360 --> 1:01:46.480
<v Speaker 2>of revelations about my like my sexual history and also

1:01:46.600 --> 1:01:52.000
<v Speaker 2>like sexual abuse that I've experienced. And it's it's interesting

1:01:52.280 --> 1:01:54.919
<v Speaker 2>because it's not things that I don't think, not things

1:01:54.920 --> 1:01:56.760
<v Speaker 2>that I did not know, but it's things that I'm

1:01:56.800 --> 1:02:01.200
<v Speaker 2>now sitting with a little bit longer and observing a

1:02:01.240 --> 1:02:04.640
<v Speaker 2>little bit longer and seeing like how it has affected

1:02:04.680 --> 1:02:07.720
<v Speaker 2>me or how it hasn't if I've not even addressed them,

1:02:08.320 --> 1:02:12.120
<v Speaker 2>And it's it's kind of heavy, and it's it's also

1:02:12.200 --> 1:02:14.400
<v Speaker 2>interesting because I think I've used sex a lot too.

1:02:15.920 --> 1:02:19.360
<v Speaker 2>I've used sex a lot as like my drug, like

1:02:19.440 --> 1:02:22.360
<v Speaker 2>I could like and part of it felt empowering, like

1:02:22.400 --> 1:02:24.040
<v Speaker 2>I could do whatever I want with my body, fuck

1:02:24.080 --> 1:02:26.320
<v Speaker 2>these niggas. But then a part of me now and

1:02:26.440 --> 1:02:28.480
<v Speaker 2>like this this chapter of my life, it seems like

1:02:28.560 --> 1:02:31.680
<v Speaker 2>maybe that was like a front obviously, Like so there's

1:02:31.680 --> 1:02:34.000
<v Speaker 2>some there's definitely some trauma there and like some things

1:02:34.040 --> 1:02:36.720
<v Speaker 2>that you know, I just I have to accept. And

1:02:36.800 --> 1:02:39.160
<v Speaker 2>also like when you don't know better and you do

1:02:39.320 --> 1:02:42.360
<v Speaker 2>things like because that's your defense mechanism or that's how

1:02:42.440 --> 1:02:45.480
<v Speaker 2>that's your medicine at that time, you can't like it's

1:02:45.480 --> 1:02:50.480
<v Speaker 2>not worth it to to hold shame in those places.

1:02:50.560 --> 1:02:53.680
<v Speaker 2>But just like the forgiveness and just you know, the

1:02:53.680 --> 1:02:56.480
<v Speaker 2>pussy holds a lot. So when you start to sit

1:02:56.520 --> 1:02:58.320
<v Speaker 2>with yourself in that way, I feel like there's a

1:02:59.480 --> 1:03:03.640
<v Speaker 2>it could be jarring, but it's also beautiful. It's also

1:03:03.720 --> 1:03:06.120
<v Speaker 2>like I also realize as these things come up for

1:03:06.200 --> 1:03:08.840
<v Speaker 2>me and it's my age, but also the sense of

1:03:08.880 --> 1:03:11.080
<v Speaker 2>safety I feel in my relationship, the sense of safety

1:03:11.120 --> 1:03:13.880
<v Speaker 2>I feel in my environment that I have. My body

1:03:13.920 --> 1:03:17.040
<v Speaker 2>is now telling me it's okay and it's safe to

1:03:17.120 --> 1:03:20.680
<v Speaker 2>look at Now. You have a moment, you're safe, we

1:03:21.080 --> 1:03:22.760
<v Speaker 2>have time and space. You don't have to hide these

1:03:22.800 --> 1:03:25.120
<v Speaker 2>things from yourself anymore. You don't have to ignore them,

1:03:25.120 --> 1:03:28.400
<v Speaker 2>you don't have to numb them. It's okay to process now,

1:03:28.960 --> 1:03:30.680
<v Speaker 2>which is you know, I keep telling myself like it's

1:03:30.680 --> 1:03:33.480
<v Speaker 2>nothing to avoid, it's actually a beautiful place to arrive.

1:03:34.200 --> 1:03:39.600
<v Speaker 1>So no, it's spiritual. It's like, I mean, I've had

1:03:39.640 --> 1:03:44.400
<v Speaker 1>so many experiences like that in my relationship and then

1:03:44.440 --> 1:03:50.400
<v Speaker 1>also by myself, and like there is not much difference

1:03:50.440 --> 1:03:55.760
<v Speaker 1>between like feeling the ecstasy of like an orgasm and

1:03:55.840 --> 1:03:58.720
<v Speaker 1>also feeling like the love of what God feels.

1:03:58.400 --> 1:04:00.160
<v Speaker 2>Like in your life too, it's the same thing.

1:04:00.200 --> 1:04:02.480
<v Speaker 1>And I know that's what I'm saying, is like, but

1:04:02.680 --> 1:04:04.960
<v Speaker 1>like there's so much so many people will listen to

1:04:04.960 --> 1:04:07.320
<v Speaker 1>that and be like what the fuck Like when you

1:04:07.360 --> 1:04:12.320
<v Speaker 1>have really allowed yourself the freedom to remove all shame

1:04:12.400 --> 1:04:14.840
<v Speaker 1>and be seen whether that's by your for yourself or

1:04:14.880 --> 1:04:18.560
<v Speaker 1>with someone else in the act of like what is

1:04:18.600 --> 1:04:21.240
<v Speaker 1>like one of the one is the most holiest act

1:04:21.280 --> 1:04:25.160
<v Speaker 1>of like being human, which is creation and love. Then

1:04:25.400 --> 1:04:29.400
<v Speaker 1>like it's just it's just it's just incredible and the

1:04:29.440 --> 1:04:32.520
<v Speaker 1>healing that can happen there. But for me, like, yes,

1:04:32.560 --> 1:04:34.880
<v Speaker 1>I've experienced moments like that, but I haven't been able

1:04:34.880 --> 1:04:38.360
<v Speaker 1>to sustain them in the ways like that. I you know,

1:04:38.480 --> 1:04:40.480
<v Speaker 1>there's basically I'm saying, there's still work to be done,

1:04:40.640 --> 1:04:45.360
<v Speaker 1>but I'm grateful for the journey of like contra, I'm

1:04:45.480 --> 1:04:48.960
<v Speaker 1>think great grateful for the journey of all the all

1:04:49.000 --> 1:04:50.840
<v Speaker 1>the different spaces and places and the women that I've

1:04:50.840 --> 1:04:53.520
<v Speaker 1>met along the way that have guided me to knowing

1:04:53.520 --> 1:04:56.880
<v Speaker 1>my body better, because it definitely wasn't men that helped. Actually,

1:04:56.960 --> 1:04:59.080
<v Speaker 1>it's been women that have brought me closer to like

1:04:59.800 --> 1:05:03.439
<v Speaker 1>my sexuality, and not because I've slept with women. It's

1:05:03.520 --> 1:05:07.600
<v Speaker 1>just like witnessing other women in their embodiment, in the

1:05:07.600 --> 1:05:10.840
<v Speaker 1>freedom of who they are has has done that. And

1:05:10.880 --> 1:05:15.000
<v Speaker 1>so it's just important for us to be in circle

1:05:15.120 --> 1:05:16.760
<v Speaker 1>with one another and be able to have these kind

1:05:16.800 --> 1:05:20.400
<v Speaker 1>of conversations and be able to share like the fact

1:05:20.440 --> 1:05:22.680
<v Speaker 1>that you know, this person writing in bravely in our

1:05:22.720 --> 1:05:25.240
<v Speaker 1>discord for everyone to see that, like you know, she's

1:05:25.280 --> 1:05:27.960
<v Speaker 1>struggling with this, where a lot of people would feel ashamed,

1:05:28.360 --> 1:05:30.440
<v Speaker 1>you know. So like I just I'm just so grateful

1:05:30.440 --> 1:05:33.840
<v Speaker 1>that we have this community where we can can talk

1:05:33.880 --> 1:05:37.280
<v Speaker 1>and share about where we're at and help each other.

1:05:38.120 --> 1:05:43.600
<v Speaker 2>Yes, and we're the journey is hopefully forever, you know,

1:05:43.720 --> 1:05:46.120
<v Speaker 2>like we're always learning, Like the life is the journey,

1:05:46.120 --> 1:05:49.640
<v Speaker 2>and it's beautiful, and we're not ever healed, we're always

1:05:50.040 --> 1:05:52.560
<v Speaker 2>in process. We're always in healing, and do things get

1:05:52.600 --> 1:05:55.680
<v Speaker 2>easier and better and like more clear, Yes, if you're

1:05:55.720 --> 1:05:59.360
<v Speaker 2>devoted to constantly like adjusting and finding pleasure and also

1:05:59.400 --> 1:06:02.040
<v Speaker 2>being gentle with the adjustments. Like I also feel like

1:06:02.080 --> 1:06:03.480
<v Speaker 2>in this chapter, I'm like, I just want to be

1:06:04.880 --> 1:06:09.760
<v Speaker 2>treated nicely by myself to myself and like be gentle

1:06:09.880 --> 1:06:13.920
<v Speaker 2>and like because every day life goes on, you know,

1:06:14.000 --> 1:06:16.000
<v Speaker 2>every day, like we wake up and we start over

1:06:16.240 --> 1:06:18.040
<v Speaker 2>and it's a new day, and I just like, I

1:06:18.080 --> 1:06:21.320
<v Speaker 2>know women are so hard on themselves, and like we're

1:06:21.360 --> 1:06:23.800
<v Speaker 2>all just figuring it out.

1:06:24.200 --> 1:06:32.760
<v Speaker 1>Amen, you have an information, it's week. We're all just

1:06:32.760 --> 1:06:33.360
<v Speaker 1>figuring it out.

1:06:33.360 --> 1:06:38.959
<v Speaker 2>We're all just figuring it out. Be gentle with yourself. Yeah,

1:06:39.560 --> 1:06:40.320
<v Speaker 2>because it's true.

1:06:42.000 --> 1:06:46.959
<v Speaker 1>I can't believe already thirty eight Wow, that's not that's fine.

1:06:47.200 --> 1:06:50.080
<v Speaker 1>All of it's fine. I'm actually forty isn't scary to me.

1:06:50.360 --> 1:06:53.080
<v Speaker 1>It's just a it's just like a marker. And I

1:06:53.120 --> 1:06:55.480
<v Speaker 1>feel like for me, and that's what it's like when

1:06:55.680 --> 1:06:59.040
<v Speaker 1>Sebastian told me you're that midlife if you live till eighty,

1:06:59.160 --> 1:07:02.440
<v Speaker 1>it is oh wow, Okay, I mean hopefully I live

1:07:02.480 --> 1:07:06.000
<v Speaker 1>longer than that, but yeah, kind of it's a roundish.

1:07:06.240 --> 1:07:10.880
<v Speaker 1>It's a roundish midlife. For sure, you're healthy at minimum,

1:07:10.960 --> 1:07:12.600
<v Speaker 1>and like something crazy doesn't happen like you.

1:07:13.240 --> 1:07:15.000
<v Speaker 2>But that's the thing, something crazy could happen. It's like

1:07:15.320 --> 1:07:17.240
<v Speaker 2>it's no guarantee, like we can exactly.

1:07:17.360 --> 1:07:19.640
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, that's why you gotta just do it now, do

1:07:19.760 --> 1:07:22.720
<v Speaker 1>it all now, take the solo trip, now, book the retreat. Now,

1:07:22.800 --> 1:07:25.600
<v Speaker 1>come to Costa Rica, Hay, Now that's this summer now,

1:07:27.320 --> 1:07:30.720
<v Speaker 1>Like make sure you're you know, your cup is filled

1:07:30.720 --> 1:07:34.520
<v Speaker 1>in all areas now, like go try that new fucking

1:07:34.600 --> 1:07:36.400
<v Speaker 1>restaurant you've been wanting to try.

1:07:36.200 --> 1:07:39.280
<v Speaker 2>Now Yeah, like yeah, pretty much, you know.

1:07:39.560 --> 1:07:41.720
<v Speaker 1>Like forgive that person now, tell that other person you

1:07:41.760 --> 1:07:44.720
<v Speaker 1>love them, now all the things, like just try to

1:07:44.760 --> 1:07:48.000
<v Speaker 1>be present, try to be like try to like let's

1:07:48.040 --> 1:07:50.240
<v Speaker 1>just try to be on ten all the time. Yeah,

1:07:50.320 --> 1:07:52.439
<v Speaker 1>like but like in the in like not down ten,

1:07:52.640 --> 1:07:58.200
<v Speaker 1>like stressful ten, but like in the presence of yourself.

1:07:58.360 --> 1:08:01.360
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, like the beauty of today, the beauty of right now,

1:08:01.440 --> 1:08:04.240
<v Speaker 2>the beauty of where you're at right in this very moment, and.

1:08:04.200 --> 1:08:05.800
<v Speaker 1>What you want and what you're creating and what you

1:08:05.800 --> 1:08:12.120
<v Speaker 1>want to leave behind. And yeah, so I'm excited to

1:08:12.160 --> 1:08:14.520
<v Speaker 1>go do that. I'll give you guys. It's an update

1:08:14.560 --> 1:08:16.880
<v Speaker 1>on my solo trip. How long are you going for

1:08:17.160 --> 1:08:19.719
<v Speaker 1>a week? I love your nice It's gonna be nice

1:08:20.960 --> 1:08:21.719
<v Speaker 1>one week.

1:08:22.640 --> 1:08:25.840
<v Speaker 2>What made you choose Mexico City cheap?

1:08:27.680 --> 1:08:30.000
<v Speaker 1>And I love Mexico City. Yeah, Mexico City is nice.

1:08:30.000 --> 1:08:32.800
<v Speaker 2>I really as part of Escondido near the beach.

1:08:33.040 --> 1:08:36.120
<v Speaker 1>Yeah. That take a flight from Mexico City a small plane.

1:08:36.840 --> 1:08:39.559
<v Speaker 1>I don't know. I don't think so. I think everything's

1:08:39.560 --> 1:08:45.840
<v Speaker 1>a small thing. But I also well, the first time

1:08:45.840 --> 1:08:48.040
<v Speaker 1>I went to Mexico City, I was like, I could

1:08:48.120 --> 1:08:49.760
<v Speaker 1>live here. I started looking at apartments and ship I

1:08:49.800 --> 1:08:52.800
<v Speaker 1>had there's something I have a connection there. I don't know.

1:08:52.920 --> 1:08:57.960
<v Speaker 1>Maybe some months my ancestors were over there. But yeah,

1:08:58.040 --> 1:08:59.519
<v Speaker 1>so I'm going to go there for two days and

1:08:59.520 --> 1:09:02.160
<v Speaker 1>then I'm going to go to Puertoes Gondido, which has

1:09:02.200 --> 1:09:03.960
<v Speaker 1>always been on my bucket list and I wanted to

1:09:04.000 --> 1:09:08.479
<v Speaker 1>go for my birthday. That time that I left Nisha

1:09:08.720 --> 1:09:11.120
<v Speaker 1>and Brandon with my ex boyfriend and left the Airbnb

1:09:11.240 --> 1:09:12.040
<v Speaker 1>and went to a hotel.

1:09:13.280 --> 1:09:15.599
<v Speaker 2>I got about that I was trying to go there.

1:09:15.920 --> 1:09:17.760
<v Speaker 1>That wasn't tuloom, though I know we end up going

1:09:17.760 --> 1:09:20.120
<v Speaker 1>to Tulom because the world lockdown. It was like it

1:09:20.160 --> 1:09:22.320
<v Speaker 1>was it was like right out of COVID and like that.

1:09:22.400 --> 1:09:25.080
<v Speaker 1>I was either gonna go to o Wahaka and Escondido.

1:09:25.600 --> 1:09:28.160
<v Speaker 1>But I didn't realize that mech well, I know Mexico

1:09:28.240 --> 1:09:29.720
<v Speaker 1>is big, but I didn't realize how hard it is

1:09:29.760 --> 1:09:32.240
<v Speaker 1>to travel. Like I thought, Oh, I can just go

1:09:32.280 --> 1:09:34.519
<v Speaker 1>from I can just drive from the thinking of Costa

1:09:34.600 --> 1:09:37.559
<v Speaker 1>Rica was like I've driven in through terrains and shit,

1:09:37.720 --> 1:09:40.479
<v Speaker 1>I got that. They were like, no, bit twelve hours,

1:09:40.600 --> 1:09:43.160
<v Speaker 1>Yes you could, but it's gonna take twelve hours. I

1:09:43.240 --> 1:09:47.839
<v Speaker 1>was like, okay, never mind. So we went to Tulum instead.

1:09:48.240 --> 1:09:50.560
<v Speaker 1>But I don't know if that feel like Tuloom. I

1:09:50.560 --> 1:09:52.240
<v Speaker 1>don't know if it's kind of it's a little a

1:09:52.320 --> 1:09:58.040
<v Speaker 1>shady energy. Now, yeah, it's over. It's been colonized and colonized.

1:09:58.360 --> 1:09:59.639
<v Speaker 1>Did you see Bali?

1:10:00.680 --> 1:10:04.760
<v Speaker 2>Uh like made a a law that if you do

1:10:04.840 --> 1:10:08.160
<v Speaker 2>a sponsored post from Bali that you could be arrested.

1:10:08.640 --> 1:10:11.960
<v Speaker 2>Its attained. If you do a sponsored like using them

1:10:12.000 --> 1:10:14.679
<v Speaker 2>for tourism, a sponsored post, you will be detained.

1:10:16.040 --> 1:10:16.360
<v Speaker 1>Wow.

1:10:16.680 --> 1:10:18.880
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, they're not fucking around just because they need to

1:10:18.880 --> 1:10:21.640
<v Speaker 2>get their ship together to a little bit I mean

1:10:21.800 --> 1:10:25.200
<v Speaker 2>because because it's too many people, so it's too close

1:10:25.200 --> 1:10:31.440
<v Speaker 2>to fucking white ass Australia. Yeah, it's the whites everywhere there.

1:10:31.600 --> 1:10:33.599
<v Speaker 1>It's so beautiful. I'm going to go back. I really

1:10:33.600 --> 1:10:59.640
<v Speaker 1>want to go back. Love Balie so much. Before we

1:10:59.680 --> 1:11:02.280
<v Speaker 1>get out of here, I think it's Terot.

1:11:02.080 --> 1:11:05.320
<v Speaker 2>Time, Terot time, terror time.

1:11:15.400 --> 1:11:19.600
<v Speaker 1>What is it? The Nine of Cups? What does it

1:11:19.600 --> 1:11:24.680
<v Speaker 1>look like? Oh? Okay, it looks like.

1:11:24.640 --> 1:11:32.280
<v Speaker 2>You got a ship together, aund right ups. Oh you

1:11:32.320 --> 1:11:34.800
<v Speaker 2>can try me if you like it, says the first

1:11:34.800 --> 1:11:38.040
<v Speaker 2>thing I saw. This first thing that I saw is

1:11:38.080 --> 1:11:40.679
<v Speaker 2>it's it's generally known as the make a wish card.

1:11:41.439 --> 1:11:43.599
<v Speaker 2>You know those moments when you glance around and feel

1:11:43.600 --> 1:11:46.360
<v Speaker 2>your heart overflowing with love and appreciation for everything you

1:11:46.400 --> 1:11:48.800
<v Speaker 2>have created in your life. That's what the Nine of

1:11:48.840 --> 1:11:53.400
<v Speaker 2>Cups is about. Emotional fulfillment, happiness, and contentment. When this

1:11:53.439 --> 1:11:55.800
<v Speaker 2>card appears in a tarot reading, you're content in all

1:11:55.840 --> 1:12:00.679
<v Speaker 2>aspects of your life, relationships, work, lifestyle, well being, and more.

1:12:00.920 --> 1:12:03.840
<v Speaker 2>You are basking in the abundance of life and experiencing

1:12:03.880 --> 1:12:07.559
<v Speaker 2>your emotions with such intensity and pleasure. This is why

1:12:07.560 --> 1:12:09.960
<v Speaker 2>the Nine of Cups is often called the wish card.

1:12:10.280 --> 1:12:12.640
<v Speaker 2>It comes as a sign that the planet's aligned and

1:12:12.680 --> 1:12:15.799
<v Speaker 2>you have everything you wished for. You couldnt be happier.

1:12:16.240 --> 1:12:18.479
<v Speaker 2>If you made your wish and you're patiently waiting for

1:12:18.520 --> 1:12:21.400
<v Speaker 2>it to come to fruition, then this card is an

1:12:21.439 --> 1:12:25.760
<v Speaker 2>excellent omen that will soon be granted. The Nine of

1:12:25.800 --> 1:12:29.360
<v Speaker 2>Cups is an invitation to splurge, indulge, and enjoy life's pleasures.

1:12:29.640 --> 1:12:32.719
<v Speaker 2>This includes enjoying good food and wine, appreciating the arts,

1:12:32.840 --> 1:12:36.879
<v Speaker 2>making love, relaxing in a luxurious resort, or experiencing beauty.

1:12:37.760 --> 1:12:40.760
<v Speaker 2>Live in the moment, and give yourself permission to indulge

1:12:40.800 --> 1:12:45.000
<v Speaker 2>temporarily without any guilt about the possible negative consequences of

1:12:45.040 --> 1:12:45.639
<v Speaker 2>such pleasure.

1:12:47.840 --> 1:12:50.360
<v Speaker 1>Yeah. Go in word, bitch, Yeah go in word. Be

1:12:50.439 --> 1:12:53.400
<v Speaker 1>in devotion to yourself, Go on solo trips, go to

1:12:53.439 --> 1:12:56.120
<v Speaker 1>the sex party, fill all your cups.

1:12:55.920 --> 1:12:58.960
<v Speaker 2>Remember to count your blessings and express gratitude for what

1:12:59.000 --> 1:13:02.000
<v Speaker 2>you have. Start or end every day by creating a

1:13:02.040 --> 1:13:03.880
<v Speaker 2>mental list of the three things for which you are

1:13:03.920 --> 1:13:04.599
<v Speaker 2>most grateful.

1:13:05.800 --> 1:13:07.880
<v Speaker 1>I'm gonna do that. Yeah, that's starting today, all the

1:13:07.880 --> 1:13:10.400
<v Speaker 1>way through my trip and forever.

1:13:10.800 --> 1:13:15.360
<v Speaker 2>Do you need to add a gratitude segment? Maybe the

1:13:15.520 --> 1:13:18.080
<v Speaker 2>things you're grateful for. Over time, you will intensify your

1:13:18.120 --> 1:13:20.600
<v Speaker 2>sense of contentment and your ability to attract what you

1:13:20.640 --> 1:13:24.360
<v Speaker 2>wish for. It is the law of attraction. We are

1:13:25.040 --> 1:13:29.000
<v Speaker 2>testimonies to the law of attraction. We have really quite

1:13:29.040 --> 1:13:33.559
<v Speaker 2>literally built this. This has been our vision. I literally,

1:13:33.600 --> 1:13:36.360
<v Speaker 2>oh my fucking god, I just had a vision and

1:13:36.400 --> 1:13:39.559
<v Speaker 2>one of our one million shared notes a long time ago,

1:13:39.960 --> 1:13:43.800
<v Speaker 2>there is a picture of a there's like a neon sign.

1:13:44.400 --> 1:13:48.559
<v Speaker 2>There's this fucking palm tree. Literally, this is what we envisioned.

1:13:48.560 --> 1:13:51.000
<v Speaker 2>I think it was like a nighttime a night you're

1:13:51.000 --> 1:13:52.000
<v Speaker 2>talking about a night life show.

1:13:52.000 --> 1:13:52.320
<v Speaker 1>I don't know what.

1:13:53.280 --> 1:13:55.240
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, that's one of our first notes together. That's probably

1:13:55.439 --> 1:13:58.599
<v Speaker 2>gone on for five years. But wow, I gotta look

1:13:58.640 --> 1:13:59.519
<v Speaker 2>that notes up.

1:14:03.920 --> 1:14:08.320
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, yeah, we created this, and I'm grateful for what

1:14:08.360 --> 1:14:10.840
<v Speaker 1>we've created. I'm grateful for you. I'm grateful for you

1:14:10.880 --> 1:14:13.920
<v Speaker 1>guys listening that have been on this journey with us.

1:14:14.000 --> 1:14:18.479
<v Speaker 1>I'm grateful for uh breath that I could even breathe

1:14:18.560 --> 1:14:25.200
<v Speaker 1>to speak on this motherfucking mic. I'm just I'm grateful.

1:14:25.640 --> 1:14:29.720
<v Speaker 1>So and I have been feeling grateful even though like

1:14:29.760 --> 1:14:32.080
<v Speaker 1>there's been a lot of shifts going on, but I

1:14:32.120 --> 1:14:34.960
<v Speaker 1>am grateful for them. I'm grateful that I know I

1:14:35.000 --> 1:14:37.559
<v Speaker 1>have this. I think I'm getting into deeper knowing that

1:14:37.800 --> 1:14:41.960
<v Speaker 1>I like everything always works out. Yeah, everything is gonna

1:14:42.000 --> 1:14:46.439
<v Speaker 1>be fine. It's just the the in betweenness that is, like.

1:14:47.920 --> 1:14:50.160
<v Speaker 2>You know, because there's always like we always have this

1:14:50.240 --> 1:14:52.040
<v Speaker 2>definition of what fine is going to be and how

1:14:52.040 --> 1:14:54.280
<v Speaker 2>it's gonna come, Like God's gonna come down and give

1:14:54.280 --> 1:14:57.120
<v Speaker 2>you the call. You're a millionaire bitch, it's.

1:14:57.000 --> 1:14:59.680
<v Speaker 1>Like, hey, God, Hey, it's God, It's time to go

1:14:59.760 --> 1:15:02.200
<v Speaker 1>see you know. But it's like it never happens that way.

1:15:02.280 --> 1:15:03.840
<v Speaker 2>So it's like we might as well just accept that

1:15:03.880 --> 1:15:05.439
<v Speaker 2>it doesn't really happen that way. It's always like a

1:15:05.479 --> 1:15:07.519
<v Speaker 2>gradual build and then you're like, oh shit, I'm here.

1:15:07.720 --> 1:15:08.080
<v Speaker 1>Yeah.

1:15:08.120 --> 1:15:11.000
<v Speaker 2>So and then I realized, because we're sitting in our manifestation,

1:15:11.720 --> 1:15:14.559
<v Speaker 2>like now's the time we get to like sharpen it,

1:15:15.040 --> 1:15:16.519
<v Speaker 2>you know what I mean, Like we just had we

1:15:16.960 --> 1:15:19.320
<v Speaker 2>threw some shit out, and a lot of it came

1:15:19.439 --> 1:15:21.280
<v Speaker 2>like on travel a time. I want to be so

1:15:21.360 --> 1:15:24.439
<v Speaker 2>cool travel all the time. And then like okay, we

1:15:24.520 --> 1:15:27.080
<v Speaker 2>travel all the time, literally all the time. You know.

1:15:27.160 --> 1:15:29.240
<v Speaker 1>That was all of our manifestation board that we made.

1:15:29.200 --> 1:15:33.960
<v Speaker 2>Yes, travel travel with our kids, travel travel, and then

1:15:34.000 --> 1:15:36.799
<v Speaker 2>we did. We traveled a lot and we are traveling

1:15:36.800 --> 1:15:38.639
<v Speaker 2>a lot, and I'm grateful for that. And then I'm like, oh,

1:15:38.640 --> 1:15:42.600
<v Speaker 2>we could, like we can fine tune it. And it's

1:15:42.680 --> 1:15:44.400
<v Speaker 2>not a matter of if it's going to happen, it's

1:15:44.520 --> 1:15:45.360
<v Speaker 2>just a matter of when.

1:15:46.600 --> 1:15:53.000
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, yeah, so yeah, And I'm grateful for creation energy.

1:15:53.080 --> 1:15:54.840
<v Speaker 1>I'm grateful to be a woman. I'm grateful to be

1:15:54.840 --> 1:15:55.439
<v Speaker 1>a black woman.

1:15:55.560 --> 1:15:56.320
<v Speaker 2>I'm so grateful.

1:15:56.400 --> 1:15:58.839
<v Speaker 1>I'm grateful to be a black woman during this beautiful

1:15:58.920 --> 1:16:02.920
<v Speaker 1>month of just black focus and celebration, and I'm just

1:16:03.520 --> 1:16:06.280
<v Speaker 1>thank you God, make me black in every make me

1:16:06.320 --> 1:16:09.400
<v Speaker 1>blacker next lifetime, not black, actually can be a little

1:16:09.400 --> 1:16:11.599
<v Speaker 1>more blessed, just a little more, you know, just like

1:16:11.720 --> 1:16:15.080
<v Speaker 1>come on a bit cheb and like just a reminder

1:16:15.120 --> 1:16:18.080
<v Speaker 1>that in this time and space, like they're literally.

1:16:19.200 --> 1:16:23.000
<v Speaker 2>Harvesting our fear, they're harvesting our anger and like the joy,

1:16:23.360 --> 1:16:28.120
<v Speaker 2>the connection, the pleasure, like literally black pleasure is revolutionary.

1:16:28.280 --> 1:16:30.000
<v Speaker 1>So like just don't forget and under attack.

1:16:30.200 --> 1:16:32.160
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, like we're constander attack. It's not for no reason,

1:16:32.200 --> 1:16:33.960
<v Speaker 2>Like this is why we have to go harder in

1:16:33.960 --> 1:16:36.439
<v Speaker 2>the paint of the pleasure, you know, like really go

1:16:36.479 --> 1:16:39.439
<v Speaker 2>to the barbecue, really laugh hard, really be like in love,

1:16:39.600 --> 1:16:43.439
<v Speaker 2>really have meaningful relationships, really dance, you know, like really

1:16:43.880 --> 1:16:50.080
<v Speaker 2>just experience live music, touch, vulnerability, just expression, creativity, like

1:16:50.120 --> 1:16:52.559
<v Speaker 2>it all. It really is a blessing to be black

1:16:52.640 --> 1:16:55.080
<v Speaker 2>in this time, in this age. And like don't get

1:16:55.080 --> 1:16:58.120
<v Speaker 2>wrapped up in the in the bullshit because they're feeding

1:16:58.120 --> 1:17:02.040
<v Speaker 2>at specific things because they know our enlightenment, in our

1:17:02.040 --> 1:17:04.960
<v Speaker 2>connection is the judgment to the entire system.

1:17:05.200 --> 1:17:08.360
<v Speaker 1>So like it's just yeah, it just feels like go time.

1:17:08.600 --> 1:17:11.040
<v Speaker 1>That's what I keep feeling, Like just all your ideas,

1:17:11.080 --> 1:17:13.640
<v Speaker 1>all your void like everything, all your opinions. It's not

1:17:13.680 --> 1:17:14.960
<v Speaker 1>a time to shut the fuck up.

1:17:15.360 --> 1:17:17.479
<v Speaker 2>No, it's not a time to shut the fuck up.

1:17:17.479 --> 1:17:19.320
<v Speaker 1>Well, you need to shut the fuck with talking to everybody.

1:17:19.439 --> 1:17:21.639
<v Speaker 2>I was to stop talking to people. I'm gonna talk here.

1:17:22.040 --> 1:17:24.439
<v Speaker 1>But it's not a time to like silence your arts

1:17:24.439 --> 1:17:26.519
<v Speaker 1>and your opinions. Like that's exactly what they're trying to

1:17:26.560 --> 1:17:28.679
<v Speaker 1>do right now with so much And it's so beautiful

1:17:28.720 --> 1:17:33.200
<v Speaker 1>to see like like black art creators like just pushing

1:17:33.240 --> 1:17:35.240
<v Speaker 1>through and saying fuck you, fuck that. Like I just

1:17:35.240 --> 1:17:38.320
<v Speaker 1>saw vic menso raise like twenty thousand dollars for like

1:17:38.320 --> 1:17:40.800
<v Speaker 1>like fourteen hours for his short film. And it's just

1:17:40.840 --> 1:17:44.320
<v Speaker 1>like that's what I'm talking about, like not waiting, not

1:17:44.439 --> 1:17:48.240
<v Speaker 1>waiting on anybody, not like not waiting on the perfect time,

1:17:48.320 --> 1:17:50.600
<v Speaker 1>the a perfect opportunity to take that solo trip, the

1:17:50.640 --> 1:17:52.920
<v Speaker 1>perfect time to write the script, the perfect time to

1:17:52.920 --> 1:17:55.600
<v Speaker 1>start your fucking podcast, perfect time to have your like

1:17:55.640 --> 1:17:57.400
<v Speaker 1>whatever it is, or the perfect time to take a

1:17:57.439 --> 1:17:59.720
<v Speaker 1>break because maybe you've been in goot season for a

1:17:59.760 --> 1:18:02.800
<v Speaker 1>long time, like it's caliber, it's go time to do

1:18:02.880 --> 1:18:05.960
<v Speaker 1>whatever is it is that is going to bring you

1:18:06.040 --> 1:18:10.960
<v Speaker 1>in closer like communion with yourself because that's what's under attack.

1:18:11.240 --> 1:18:13.120
<v Speaker 2>And also like you have to get rid of the

1:18:13.200 --> 1:18:15.720
<v Speaker 2>rules in order to embody that. You have to like

1:18:15.800 --> 1:18:18.840
<v Speaker 2>stop questioning yourself. You have to be more sexual, be

1:18:18.920 --> 1:18:21.320
<v Speaker 2>more loud, whatever it is. Like even with the women

1:18:21.400 --> 1:18:24.479
<v Speaker 2>I see like the pigmies and this weird era like

1:18:24.520 --> 1:18:28.680
<v Speaker 2>of like this is not the time to pretend, Like

1:18:28.720 --> 1:18:32.120
<v Speaker 2>this is not the time to just to like to

1:18:33.640 --> 1:18:37.519
<v Speaker 2>be within the system because it's safe. It's the time

1:18:37.600 --> 1:18:42.000
<v Speaker 2>to be wild and feral and like be all of yourselves,

1:18:42.040 --> 1:18:46.920
<v Speaker 2>like in blackness and femininity, in womenhood because they are

1:18:46.960 --> 1:18:51.000
<v Speaker 2>literally it's under attack. And like that's the thing with this,

1:18:51.000 --> 1:18:53.439
<v Speaker 2>this whole movement too, is like once the marbles have

1:18:53.520 --> 1:18:55.920
<v Speaker 2>come out of the fucking barrel, they can't go back in.

1:18:56.479 --> 1:19:00.200
<v Speaker 2>Like you can't undo, like you can't undo rights. We've

1:19:00.240 --> 1:19:02.960
<v Speaker 2>already experienced it, you know, So just be.

1:19:03.000 --> 1:19:09.519
<v Speaker 1>More you yea, more love, more accepting, question your belief

1:19:09.560 --> 1:19:13.240
<v Speaker 1>systems and you know, like you're not going to agree

1:19:13.280 --> 1:19:15.800
<v Speaker 1>with everybody. I don't agree with everybody, but that doesn't

1:19:15.840 --> 1:19:18.440
<v Speaker 1>mean that I have to degrade people or like downplay

1:19:18.800 --> 1:19:21.559
<v Speaker 1>people's experiences and truths. And so it's just a matter

1:19:21.640 --> 1:19:25.360
<v Speaker 1>of like being open hearted and helpful.

1:19:25.439 --> 1:19:27.920
<v Speaker 2>And not accepting things just how they are, but.

1:19:27.840 --> 1:19:30.679
<v Speaker 1>Being helpful, like to be better. Don't just be talking,

1:19:33.520 --> 1:19:40.000
<v Speaker 1>just be talking, just for shut the fuck up. Okay. Anyway,

1:19:40.240 --> 1:19:43.439
<v Speaker 1>thank you for going on this rant with us, on

1:19:43.439 --> 1:19:45.960
<v Speaker 1>this journey as usual. We love you so so much.

1:19:47.360 --> 1:19:49.720
<v Speaker 1>If you have a second, please go subscribe to this

1:19:49.800 --> 1:19:55.200
<v Speaker 1>YouTube channel and also rate and review this podcast and

1:19:55.400 --> 1:19:57.439
<v Speaker 1>check out the good vibrantreet. We're going to Costa Rica

1:19:57.479 --> 1:20:00.760
<v Speaker 1>this summer. Come take your solo trip. You know I'm

1:20:00.760 --> 1:20:03.519
<v Speaker 1>being brave. You'd be Brave with me, Come meet us,

1:20:04.160 --> 1:20:07.559
<v Speaker 1>and we're doing a Momy and Me Retreat July fourteenth

1:20:07.600 --> 1:20:11.639
<v Speaker 1>through the nineteenth and a Women's Retreat Retreat July twenty

1:20:11.640 --> 1:20:15.280
<v Speaker 1>fourth through the twenty ninth, and it's fucking epic, so

1:20:15.479 --> 1:20:20.000
<v Speaker 1>come through. You can follow me at watch Erica on Instagram.

1:20:20.200 --> 1:20:22.720
<v Speaker 2>You can follow me at Mila Underscore map with the

1:20:22.720 --> 1:20:25.400
<v Speaker 2>two piece We love you Thane