WEBVTT - Stories That Will Organize Your Orgy (With Catie Osborn!) 0:00:21.720 --> 0:00:24.599 Hello, and welcome to hashtag Storytime, the podcast where I 0:00:24.640 --> 0:00:27.000 bring you everyday stories from everyday people, brought to you 0:00:27.080 --> 0:00:30.320 by I Heart Radio. I'm your host, will not Seth 0:00:30.400 --> 0:00:33.839 Rogan mc fadden, and that's right, I'm doing it. I'm 0:00:33.880 --> 0:00:38.240 calling you out Rogan, not Joe, Seth. We'll save Joe 0:00:38.240 --> 0:00:41.640 for another episode. Also, Fred Rogan, don't think I'm letting 0:00:41.680 --> 0:00:44.440 you off the hook. You probably don't know Fred Rogan 0:00:44.479 --> 0:00:45.839 is unless you live on the West Coast, but he's 0:00:45.880 --> 0:00:50.880 a beloved NBC sports anchor since whose son I also 0:00:50.960 --> 0:00:53.200 directed in a middle school production of Wizard of Oz. 0:00:53.240 --> 0:00:55.000 But that is neither here nor there. Let's get back 0:00:55.040 --> 0:00:58.600 to the beef. We're talking about Seth Rogan, who also 0:00:58.720 --> 0:01:03.000 released a podcast called story Time. What the fuck, dude, 0:01:03.240 --> 0:01:05.399 I wish you would have maybe checked if there was 0:01:05.440 --> 0:01:08.360 any other podcasts out there with that same name, but 0:01:08.440 --> 0:01:11.160 you didn't. So you know what, we added a hashtag 0:01:11.200 --> 0:01:15.200 to differentiate, and now we've got beef. We've got podcast beef, 0:01:15.800 --> 0:01:21.720 so hopefully that boost our numbers. Anyway, Today's episode is 0:01:21.920 --> 0:01:25.240 a spicy one. I mean you could say it's n 0:01:25.480 --> 0:01:30.320 s f W, which stands for not Safe for wooses. 0:01:31.280 --> 0:01:33.280 So to all my fable babies out there, if you 0:01:33.319 --> 0:01:37.000 were an actual baby, please take those adorable little headphones 0:01:37.040 --> 0:01:39.520 off and use your sub prime motor skills to choose 0:01:39.560 --> 0:01:41.880 something else to listen to, maybe RAFFI. I don't know 0:01:41.920 --> 0:01:45.920 what kids are into these days. Okay, now that they're gone, 0:01:45.959 --> 0:01:48.200 are you gone babies? Okay? Great, Now that the fucking 0:01:48.240 --> 0:01:54.120 babies are gone, let's talk about orgies. Yep, orgies. Apparently 0:01:54.280 --> 0:01:57.320 they're happening all the time, all over town, right under 0:01:57.320 --> 0:01:59.480 our noses. You know. I wonder how many orgies are 0:01:59.520 --> 0:02:04.440 happening right now within like a three yard radius. I 0:02:04.440 --> 0:02:06.880 bet there's at least two. I also wonder why I 0:02:06.920 --> 0:02:09.680 never get invited? How do these even come together? You know, 0:02:09.760 --> 0:02:12.919 like on an administrative level? How do they happen? Is 0:02:12.960 --> 0:02:15.920 there an app for this? Do they have like groupons 0:02:15.960 --> 0:02:18.400 for orgies? Oh wait, maybe I should start my own 0:02:18.440 --> 0:02:24.440 app called group on. I'm gonna be the next Zuckerberg 0:02:24.560 --> 0:02:29.680 of sex parties. Just wait, gross, I just envisioned Zuckerberg 0:02:29.720 --> 0:02:31.160 at a sex party. And look, I don't want to 0:02:31.320 --> 0:02:35.000 yuck anybody's young, but it zucks you're young, then yuck? Also, 0:02:35.120 --> 0:02:37.120 who am I kidding. I'm too lazy to start an app, 0:02:37.280 --> 0:02:39.760 even a sexy app. So why don't we hear from 0:02:39.760 --> 0:02:43.000 our wonderful guest, Katie Osborne also known as Katio also 0:02:43.040 --> 0:02:46.040 known as Katiosaurus. Katie is the co host of the 0:02:46.080 --> 0:02:50.520 Infinite Quest podcast. She's also a certified sex educator, and 0:02:50.600 --> 0:02:53.880 she speaks about neurodivergency on her TikTok. She's kind of 0:02:53.880 --> 0:02:57.160 a renaissance woman. Literally, she loves renfairs. Katie and I 0:02:57.240 --> 0:02:59.679 sat down and she told me a story that involves Shakespeare, 0:02:59.680 --> 0:03:04.240 rent sons fairs, and you guessed it core Ge. Wait sorry, 0:03:04.240 --> 0:03:09.840 that's a typo orgies. I mean I meant orgies. Okay, 0:03:09.840 --> 0:03:14.480 So yeah, Katie, Uh, tell me a story. Uh well, 0:03:14.520 --> 0:03:16.360 I would like to tell you the story of the 0:03:16.400 --> 0:03:20.200 time that I became a professional orgy organizer. I would 0:03:20.200 --> 0:03:22.240 love I would love to hear that story. All right, 0:03:22.480 --> 0:03:27.600 So the year is maybe because I'm very bad at dates, 0:03:27.800 --> 0:03:31.600 and it is summertime, and I'm working at a very 0:03:31.639 --> 0:03:36.800 small repertory Shakespeare company, uh somewhere in the Midwest. I'm 0:03:36.800 --> 0:03:39.720 going to anonymize a lot of this story because it's fine. 0:03:40.640 --> 0:03:43.280 And so there's a coffee I promise this story is 0:03:43.320 --> 0:03:45.360 going somewhere, but I like to tell the whole story. 0:03:45.560 --> 0:03:48.560 So there's a coffee shop that was like right across 0:03:48.600 --> 0:03:51.120 the street from the theater where I was working. And 0:03:51.120 --> 0:03:53.720 when we go to this coffee shop like every day, 0:03:53.800 --> 0:03:56.400 and there was this fabulous older woman who would come 0:03:56.440 --> 0:03:58.520 in and she was always just dressed to the nines 0:03:58.880 --> 0:04:01.960 and always looked just like tacular, and she was just 0:04:02.000 --> 0:04:03.880 like a presence. You know when you just meet somebody 0:04:03.880 --> 0:04:07.320 who's like a presence. She was a presence. Um. And 0:04:07.440 --> 0:04:09.840 so we got to talking and she introduced herself to me, 0:04:10.280 --> 0:04:12.360 and I want to anonimize her name, and we're gonna 0:04:12.360 --> 0:04:14.840 call her Susan for the duration of this just because 0:04:14.880 --> 0:04:18.640 I can um so Susan. So Susan and I like, 0:04:18.680 --> 0:04:20.760 we start seeing each other around this coffee shop, like 0:04:20.880 --> 0:04:22.240 you know, just you know, he does you having to 0:04:22.400 --> 0:04:24.839 your coffee shop friend and whatever. And so one day 0:04:24.920 --> 0:04:27.720 Susan comes comes in and she's looking a little distraught, 0:04:28.040 --> 0:04:31.000 and I was like, oh, Susan, what's going on? And 0:04:31.040 --> 0:04:34.320 Susan says, well, you know, it's just such a shame. 0:04:34.400 --> 0:04:37.080 I love to throw these dinner parties and and I 0:04:37.120 --> 0:04:40.040 have these dinner parties where I fight interesting people you know, 0:04:40.080 --> 0:04:42.600 from the community and from like other communities, and I 0:04:42.640 --> 0:04:45.799 bring them together and whatever, and um, I'm just having 0:04:45.920 --> 0:04:49.040 such a hard time, uh, filling the spots at this party. 0:04:49.040 --> 0:04:51.640 And I was like, oh, well that sucks. And She's like, well, 0:04:52.080 --> 0:04:53.680 do you want to come? And I was like, I'm 0:04:53.680 --> 0:04:58.400 not cool, Susan, Like I'm I'm just a Shakespeare intern. 0:04:58.480 --> 0:05:01.080 I don't deserve a spot at the table. And Susan 0:05:01.120 --> 0:05:03.920 was like, absolutely, yes, you do come to this party. 0:05:04.839 --> 0:05:13.240 So we show up at Susan's just lavish, luxurious, older 0:05:13.320 --> 0:05:17.840 lady house and like very important story, like just whatever 0:05:17.920 --> 0:05:21.360 you're picturing, like make it ten times more. Like we're 0:05:21.360 --> 0:05:25.480 talking gold tigers, we're talking plush carpeting, We're talking like 0:05:25.600 --> 0:05:28.800 just play like like a ludicrous amount of plants. It 0:05:28.839 --> 0:05:31.280 was just the best house, right, I'm picturing Susan as 0:05:31.360 --> 0:05:35.520 some combo of like Helen Mirren and like Rebecca from 0:05:35.560 --> 0:05:40.039 ted Lasso. Yes, that's honestly like dead on perfect um 0:05:40.120 --> 0:05:43.560 and so so so. Susan has like this just collection 0:05:43.600 --> 0:05:46.440 of all these like fabulous antiquities from her travels across 0:05:46.480 --> 0:05:48.640 the world. You know, she's one of these people, and 0:05:48.680 --> 0:05:51.240 she has this dining room table and it's just, you know, 0:05:51.320 --> 0:05:54.160 just this extravagant place settings and all these things. And 0:05:54.440 --> 0:05:57.080 she brings in artists, she brings in politicians, she brings 0:05:57.120 --> 0:05:58.960 in like the mayor, and like just all these things. 0:05:59.600 --> 0:06:02.400 And so over that summer, I got to be a 0:06:02.440 --> 0:06:07.159 regular at Susan's dinner parties. And so, uh, the next year, 0:06:08.000 --> 0:06:09.760 I go back to the same town. I'm working at 0:06:09.760 --> 0:06:12.279 the same theater, and Susan once again invites me over 0:06:12.320 --> 0:06:14.960 for the for the traditional you know, weekly dinner party, 0:06:15.560 --> 0:06:17.960 and uh, and one night we're all kind of like 0:06:18.000 --> 0:06:21.040 having drinks at her at her house afterwards, and and 0:06:21.120 --> 0:06:23.560 Susan was talking about her birthday party and how she 0:06:23.640 --> 0:06:26.560 was so frustrated about her birthday party because she was 0:06:26.600 --> 0:06:28.599 just she was trying to plan this party and she 0:06:28.640 --> 0:06:30.640 had no idea that it was going to be so complicated, 0:06:31.040 --> 0:06:32.640 and just like what is she going to do because 0:06:32.640 --> 0:06:35.640 it's like it's her it's her seventy fifth birthday, and 0:06:35.720 --> 0:06:37.919 she really wants it to be like a really big deal, 0:06:38.000 --> 0:06:40.320 and she's like really excited. I was like great, So 0:06:40.360 --> 0:06:43.440 I like I jokingly say, I say, well, Susan, you 0:06:43.440 --> 0:06:45.800 gotta get yourself a stage manager like me, and I'll 0:06:45.839 --> 0:06:47.600 you know, playing the party. And Susan kind of looks 0:06:47.600 --> 0:06:51.320 at me. She goes, that's actually not a bad idea, 0:06:51.360 --> 0:06:53.720 and I was like, yeah, you're hired, You're hired, and 0:06:53.760 --> 0:06:56.120 so Susan and so then Susan kind of like looks 0:06:56.120 --> 0:06:57.600 at me. She looks at a couple of other people 0:06:57.600 --> 0:06:59.080 in the room and they all kind of start giggling, 0:06:59.120 --> 0:07:01.599 and I was like what she as well, the thing 0:07:01.760 --> 0:07:05.120 is is um, it's not exactly what I would call 0:07:05.600 --> 0:07:09.560 She pauses for effect a traditional birthday party. And I 0:07:09.600 --> 0:07:11.480 was like, oh, like, what are we doing, like like, 0:07:11.560 --> 0:07:16.760 you know, uh piece of party, like bowling, laser texts, 0:07:17.000 --> 0:07:20.000 silly hats. What are we doing? And Susan's like, well, 0:07:20.040 --> 0:07:23.960 here's the thing. It's like all right, And Susan proceeds 0:07:23.960 --> 0:07:27.559 to explain to me that for the first seventy years 0:07:27.560 --> 0:07:30.280 of her life she had not been Susan. She had 0:07:30.320 --> 0:07:34.320 been John, and so at seventy years old, she had 0:07:34.360 --> 0:07:38.080 made the decision to have a gender affirming surgery and 0:07:38.160 --> 0:07:41.880 so that was her thing. And so as her sort 0:07:41.920 --> 0:07:44.000 of seventy fifth birthday came around, and she had been 0:07:44.040 --> 0:07:46.040 sort of finally being able to live as herself for 0:07:46.080 --> 0:07:48.280 the past five years, and she was really sort of 0:07:48.320 --> 0:07:50.640 starting to embrace like her sexuality and who she wasn't 0:07:50.640 --> 0:07:54.040 all of these wonderful things. She goes, I just want 0:07:54.040 --> 0:07:58.239 to have an orgy, and I was like, I didn't. 0:07:58.280 --> 0:08:00.600 I didn't. I didn't know what to do because I 0:08:00.600 --> 0:08:04.280 had been raised very conservative, Like sex was terrifying, it 0:08:04.360 --> 0:08:06.640 was scary, it was bad, it was dirty, it was 0:08:06.640 --> 0:08:08.760 like all of these things. And I was like, well, 0:08:09.400 --> 0:08:14.040 I really like Susan and and I just okay, alright, cool, 0:08:14.200 --> 0:08:17.320 I'm a stage manager and I'm a consummate professional. Let's go. 0:08:18.040 --> 0:08:21.160 And so Susan and I proceeded to have about two 0:08:21.200 --> 0:08:23.880 weeks of meeting every couple of days to get the 0:08:24.240 --> 0:08:27.960 details in order for her for her birthday party, which 0:08:28.440 --> 0:08:30.880 for the rest of this, uh this story, whenever I 0:08:30.880 --> 0:08:35.400 say birthday party, just replace it with orgy in your brain. Okay. 0:08:36.040 --> 0:08:38.400 So she so she gives me this list of people 0:08:38.520 --> 0:08:40.240 who she knows are going to be interested in this 0:08:41.120 --> 0:08:44.040 orgy birthday party. And then she also was like, okay, 0:08:44.080 --> 0:08:46.559 but here's the thing, Like there's not enough people, Like 0:08:46.840 --> 0:08:49.240 there's nothing more embarrassing than not having enough people like 0:08:49.320 --> 0:08:51.960 your orgy. And I was like I know if I 0:08:52.000 --> 0:08:56.920 had a dollar, right, um, And so I write so 0:08:57.040 --> 0:08:59.280 like I started like looking on like fat life and 0:08:59.320 --> 0:09:01.480 like we make a sting and I'm like vetting people 0:09:01.840 --> 0:09:04.840 and I'm getting like st I like reports in the 0:09:04.960 --> 0:09:07.400 mail and like I have like a whole secret email 0:09:07.400 --> 0:09:09.960 accounts set up with like a fake name like this, 0:09:10.080 --> 0:09:12.760 like just like this whole thing. Also one question, how 0:09:12.760 --> 0:09:16.320 many people is not enough people? And how many people 0:09:16.320 --> 0:09:19.160 as too many people? That is an excellent question. What 0:09:19.240 --> 0:09:22.640 is the perfect thing? You know, because that's the thing 0:09:22.760 --> 0:09:24.560 is you want a good ratio. You want to you 0:09:24.559 --> 0:09:26.839 want a good ratio of folks, right, you don't want 0:09:26.880 --> 0:09:29.320 too many you know, you just would be weird, right. 0:09:29.600 --> 0:09:32.640 Want you want options? You want options too, but also 0:09:32.720 --> 0:09:35.440 not too many options. There's like a finesse to it. 0:09:35.520 --> 0:09:38.000 There's like a balance to this. If you got too 0:09:38.000 --> 0:09:40.000 many options, it's like Netflix or that. I'm just like 0:09:40.040 --> 0:09:43.040 scrolling and scrolling and scrolling. I don't know what to pick. 0:09:43.679 --> 0:09:45.760 Great and so and it was this wonderful thing where 0:09:45.760 --> 0:09:51.200 like uh like going into this party, the like jams 0:09:51.240 --> 0:09:53.520 were like very important. We're like, Okay, what are the plates, Like, 0:09:53.520 --> 0:09:55.080 what's the playlists gonna be? Where the jam is going 0:09:55.120 --> 0:09:56.920 to be? And we kept focusing on the you know, 0:09:57.000 --> 0:09:59.719 so I have like a Spotify playlist and then you know, 0:09:59.800 --> 0:10:03.600 nothing but meat Loaf, right, just that the whole time. 0:10:04.200 --> 0:10:06.079 So then so then she was was like, Okay, well 0:10:06.120 --> 0:10:08.080 I think we were like about said on the guest list, 0:10:08.120 --> 0:10:09.880 but like now we got to get like the OCCU 0:10:09.920 --> 0:10:14.920 tramlet for the party. Right, So this this fabulous bitch 0:10:15.320 --> 0:10:19.160 gives me like five hundred dollars in cash and she 0:10:19.280 --> 0:10:21.959 sends me to like the local CBS, because I want 0:10:21.960 --> 0:10:24.160 to be very clear, this is a small town in 0:10:24.160 --> 0:10:26.520 the Midwest, Like this is not like you know, big 0:10:26.559 --> 0:10:29.640 town USA. And so she sends me and they got 0:10:29.640 --> 0:10:31.800 like five and I'm just like a's CBS, like just 0:10:31.840 --> 0:10:34.400 putting all the lube and condoms just in a bag 0:10:34.640 --> 0:10:37.480 and I'm getting like gatorade and like orange slices and 0:10:37.559 --> 0:10:42.439 toastitos and ship like it was like a weird soccer right. Well, 0:10:42.480 --> 0:10:45.000 And that was the thing. It's like, I literally because 0:10:45.000 --> 0:10:48.320 I was a stage manager and because of just like 0:10:48.440 --> 0:10:50.720 how my brain works in terms of event planning, I 0:10:50.760 --> 0:10:53.000 was like snacks. We have to have chance, we have 0:10:53.080 --> 0:10:54.760 to have snacks, and we have to have you know, 0:10:55.000 --> 0:10:58.720 cool cool folks. For the origins to the end aids, 0:10:58.760 --> 0:11:03.000 I mean so like so much planning. When I was singing, 0:11:03.320 --> 0:11:06.959 I was like, all right, cool, so um. So I'm 0:11:07.000 --> 0:11:10.080 really nervous because first off, I have this very weird 0:11:10.160 --> 0:11:13.040 connection with my sexuality, like I don't really know who 0:11:13.120 --> 0:11:15.360 I am yet. I'm just kind of like sex is 0:11:15.400 --> 0:11:17.120 scary and weird, and I'm about to go to a 0:11:17.160 --> 0:11:19.800 party that's just like all sex all the time, and 0:11:19.840 --> 0:11:23.360 so not only go to stage manage, stage manage and 0:11:23.480 --> 0:11:25.800 orgy Like I'm about to stage manage my first orgy. 0:11:26.679 --> 0:11:30.520 Step Susan enter stage left too. Well, it's funny you 0:11:30.559 --> 0:11:37.960 mentioned that because that was the next part of the story. 0:11:39.440 --> 0:11:42.040 So Susan makes it very clear she has like two 0:11:42.080 --> 0:11:44.599 wishes for this party. Like wish number one is she 0:11:44.640 --> 0:11:47.120 wants everybody to be safe, if she wants everybody be comfortable, 0:11:47.160 --> 0:11:50.040 and like, so we plan right, and so at the 0:11:50.240 --> 0:11:53.360 at the beginning of the party, like everybody gathers into 0:11:53.400 --> 0:11:57.319 this room and they brought like this big like motorcycle 0:11:57.400 --> 0:12:00.440 gang looking dude in and he was like no, listen 0:12:00.679 --> 0:12:02.760 like but it was so funny because like he just 0:12:02.760 --> 0:12:06.080 like yelled. He was just like respect and consent, and 0:12:06.120 --> 0:12:07.880 I was like, oh god, I'm so scared. I be like, 0:12:07.880 --> 0:12:10.559 oh God. And then I was like and hey, everybody 0:12:10.880 --> 0:12:13.880 just say no. So there are there's gatorade over on 0:12:13.960 --> 0:12:15.960 the counter, and I've got like my little clipboard. I 0:12:15.960 --> 0:12:18.800 had an earpiece. It wasn't connected to anything, but it 0:12:18.840 --> 0:12:22.360 made me feel important, right, and so so I'm checking 0:12:22.360 --> 0:12:26.319 people in and all this stuff. But Susan's second wish, 0:12:26.360 --> 0:12:29.160 are you also wearing a Venetian mask at this point? 0:12:29.160 --> 0:12:30.880 I was, We were not. There were no There were 0:12:30.880 --> 0:12:32.439 actually a couple of people who did show up in 0:12:32.559 --> 0:12:35.240 Venetian masks, but I was. I was in stage black. 0:12:35.360 --> 0:12:40.400 It was I just it just felt right. So so 0:12:40.400 --> 0:12:43.040 so Susan's like secondary wish for this party was she 0:12:43.120 --> 0:12:48.079 wanted an entrance, like she wanted an entrance. Um and 0:12:48.120 --> 0:12:53.160 so at the stroke of hpm, like literally grandfather clock 0:12:53.480 --> 0:12:56.120 sound effects. There was no Grandfather clock, but we made 0:12:56.160 --> 0:13:03.959 it happen. Shimes, right, music, whatever, and Susan just descends 0:13:04.080 --> 0:13:09.160 the staircase of this this house in this glorious like 0:13:09.280 --> 0:13:13.319 old Timmy Hollywood robe and she like stops like on 0:13:13.440 --> 0:13:16.560 like the center stare and she like slowly like pulls 0:13:16.600 --> 0:13:18.559 the belt off, and I was like, oh ship, oh shoot, 0:13:18.559 --> 0:13:20.280 I'm about to see a naked lady for the first 0:13:20.280 --> 0:13:22.160 time in my life except for you know, except for 0:13:22.200 --> 0:13:25.760 me and so. And she just dropped it like just 0:13:25.840 --> 0:13:28.719 so elegantly. She's like, let it fall, just like let 0:13:28.760 --> 0:13:31.280 it fall. Yes. And that was also when I found 0:13:31.280 --> 0:13:33.160 out that she had a dinosaur tattoo, which will also 0:13:33.200 --> 0:13:36.959 become important to the story later on. Um. So she's 0:13:37.000 --> 0:13:39.840 standing there like naked on the stairs and she just 0:13:39.880 --> 0:13:41.640 like puts her hands up in the air like it's 0:13:41.679 --> 0:13:46.120 goddamn Sunset Boulevard and she's like, welcome to the greatest 0:13:46.160 --> 0:13:48.800 party of your lives. And that is how like, I 0:13:48.800 --> 0:13:50.440 want to be very clear, that's also how she talked. 0:13:50.440 --> 0:13:53.760 And it was wonderful. Um and so I was like, okay, cool. So, 0:13:53.760 --> 0:13:56.120 so then the orgy starts, and I just want to 0:13:56.120 --> 0:13:58.600 be very clear, Once an orgy starts, there's not a 0:13:58.640 --> 0:14:01.640 lot to report, like like it's exactly what you think 0:14:01.760 --> 0:14:04.720 is happening. It's just it's just you know, it's fine. 0:14:05.400 --> 0:14:07.080 And so I'm sitting there with my like my little 0:14:07.120 --> 0:14:09.360 basket of like condoms and like Lupe, and I'm like 0:14:09.600 --> 0:14:12.640 hot towel and gatorant and orange slices. I'm just like 0:14:12.720 --> 0:14:15.760 soccer momm ng the ship out of this event. And 0:14:15.800 --> 0:14:17.600 so this guy comes up to me like midway through 0:14:17.600 --> 0:14:19.840 the party and he's like, hey, I just wants you 0:14:19.880 --> 0:14:21.720 to know that you're really pretty. And I was like, oh, 0:14:21.760 --> 0:14:23.840 thanks so much. I really appreciate it. He's like, yeah, 0:14:24.000 --> 0:14:26.000 so do you come to parties like this often? I 0:14:26.000 --> 0:14:27.400 was like, oh my god, no, like this is my 0:14:27.480 --> 0:14:29.640 first time. Like I was like, I'm actually just like 0:14:29.760 --> 0:14:32.480 helping Susan run the party, like as a favor. And 0:14:32.520 --> 0:14:34.680 he's like, oh, cool, cool, cool, cool cool cool cool. 0:14:34.720 --> 0:14:37.200 So you so you you plan? You do you party plan? 0:14:37.360 --> 0:14:39.240 Like you kind of do do this kind of party planning. 0:14:39.280 --> 0:14:41.360 And I was like and all of a sudden, I 0:14:41.360 --> 0:14:43.400 don't know what it was. I don't know what divine 0:14:43.400 --> 0:14:48.320 inspiration happened. I don't know what like moment of genius occurred, 0:14:48.320 --> 0:14:50.960 but I my brain just went say, yes, you're gonna 0:14:51.040 --> 0:14:55.760 make money, right business opportunity. Yeah. So I was like 0:14:55.800 --> 0:14:58.080 I was like, yeah, you know, I dabble like I'm 0:14:58.080 --> 0:15:01.600 just trying to sound cool. So so I tell this guy, yeah, 0:15:01.640 --> 0:15:03.560 and I give him my card and I'm like, yeah, 0:15:03.680 --> 0:15:06.000 I'm just saying, you know, like I'm only around like 0:15:06.080 --> 0:15:07.760 for like parts of the year because like I worked 0:15:07.760 --> 0:15:10.680 with this company. He's like, oh, yeah, no problem, no problem. 0:15:10.760 --> 0:15:13.480 And so then a couple of months later, like you, 0:15:14.200 --> 0:15:15.920 we can flesh out the rest of the story if 0:15:15.920 --> 0:15:17.520 you if you want to know about it. But that's 0:15:17.560 --> 0:15:20.960 that's the most the party part. Pun intended flesh out 0:15:21.000 --> 0:15:24.480 the rest of your welcome. What I do want to 0:15:24.480 --> 0:15:27.320 just find out is did Susan have the party effort? 0:15:27.400 --> 0:15:30.400 Was it? Did it live up? Susan had a very 0:15:30.440 --> 0:15:33.360 good time. She had a very she had a time, 0:15:34.000 --> 0:15:36.560 a time so good that it literally changed me as 0:15:36.560 --> 0:15:40.320 a person forever. And I'm not being facetious, like genuinely, 0:15:40.320 --> 0:15:44.880 and I was like, okay, cool, Um, well, yes, I 0:15:45.360 --> 0:15:47.640 kissed a lady. That was the first night I ever 0:15:47.720 --> 0:15:50.600 kissed a lady. I got very bold at the end 0:15:50.640 --> 0:15:52.360 of the night and I smoothed a lady. It was 0:15:52.480 --> 0:15:56.240 very it was very exciting. Um and so, but a 0:15:56.320 --> 0:15:58.680 couple of months later, I get an email from like 0:15:58.720 --> 0:16:02.480 this like very anonymous count like, hey, so I heard 0:16:02.640 --> 0:16:05.760 that you might be a person who plans part and 0:16:06.040 --> 0:16:08.080 I was like this is so sketchy like this, and 0:16:08.120 --> 0:16:12.280 I was like, yes, I planned, I'm stage manager. We've 0:16:12.320 --> 0:16:14.520 been planning. So do you happen to be a friend 0:16:14.520 --> 0:16:17.280 of Susan? And then they emailed back there like yes. 0:16:17.320 --> 0:16:19.640 And so then for like five years, are you a 0:16:19.680 --> 0:16:22.440 friend of Susan? Became like code. It was like a 0:16:22.480 --> 0:16:25.280 secret code in my life and people would like email 0:16:25.320 --> 0:16:27.120 me and be like party for a friend of Susan. 0:16:27.160 --> 0:16:30.080 And I was like, okay, great, and so I make 0:16:30.160 --> 0:16:33.240 business cards that just said friend of Susan. I did not, 0:16:33.360 --> 0:16:35.920 but now I regret it a friend of Susan Entertainment 0:16:37.400 --> 0:16:39.000 and so it was like and so yeah and so 0:16:39.120 --> 0:16:42.880 I and so I started like on the downlow planning 0:16:43.160 --> 0:16:45.640 like kink and B D S M and like orgy 0:16:45.720 --> 0:16:50.880 parties for people all over the Midwest. Um. And then yeah, right, 0:16:51.320 --> 0:16:53.880 and that was my secret summer job while I was 0:16:53.920 --> 0:16:57.360 working as an intern at the Shakespeare Festival because they 0:16:57.360 --> 0:17:00.080 didn't pay any money, and so I was like I 0:17:00.120 --> 0:17:03.800 really wanted to work there and I really loved doing Shakespeare. Um, 0:17:03.840 --> 0:17:05.639 but I was like, I need money, and so that 0:17:05.760 --> 0:17:08.800 was how I did that for four or five years. 0:17:08.880 --> 0:17:12.879 And then after that I went to grad school. And 0:17:12.920 --> 0:17:16.080 grad school is where I became a professional dominatrix because 0:17:16.119 --> 0:17:18.480 of all of that. Um and so that's how I 0:17:18.480 --> 0:17:21.760 put myself through grad school. Um. And now I'm a 0:17:21.840 --> 0:17:24.960 certified sex educator. And I talked about diversity and kink 0:17:25.080 --> 0:17:26.920 and d d H Day and stuff on the Internet. 0:17:26.960 --> 0:17:32.520 And it's all because of Susan. Your LinkedIn is so fascinating. 0:17:32.920 --> 0:17:36.919 I don't even have a Lincoln. It would just be 0:17:36.960 --> 0:17:40.439 like five years as it feels illegal for me to have. 0:17:42.840 --> 0:17:45.760 I think you should think. I think we should start 0:17:45.760 --> 0:17:49.120 a LinkedIn for I think I think you would win LinkedIn. 0:17:49.600 --> 0:17:53.240 I might, I might, um but so but so. Actually, 0:17:53.320 --> 0:17:55.200 the reason why this story was on my mind was 0:17:55.240 --> 0:17:58.040 because a couple of months ago, Susan passed away and 0:17:58.280 --> 0:18:01.520 uh and so in a or of Susan I got 0:18:01.720 --> 0:18:05.840 after being Katiosaurus for a very long time, which slightly 0:18:05.880 --> 0:18:08.199 inspired by Susan, like not all the way, but like 0:18:08.240 --> 0:18:10.720 I just I always remember that dinosaur tattoo. Now I 0:18:10.760 --> 0:18:13.040 have one of my own. It's right here. I mean, 0:18:13.080 --> 0:18:15.080 you can't see it. On the podcast. But and uh, 0:18:15.119 --> 0:18:17.600 and it's actually the same one that she had. I 0:18:17.640 --> 0:18:20.080 had the tattoo artist. I found a picture of it 0:18:20.119 --> 0:18:22.480 and I had them replicated. And so I have a 0:18:22.480 --> 0:18:25.720 little memory of Susan is the first person to introduce 0:18:25.800 --> 0:18:28.480 me to like sex and kink in the beautiful world 0:18:28.520 --> 0:18:30.680 of sex. And here I am opened the whole world 0:18:30.800 --> 0:18:32.960 up to it. Did it really? Did it was? It 0:18:33.040 --> 0:18:38.080 was a very interesting night. I can imagine. Well, I 0:18:38.119 --> 0:18:40.399 love that. I love that you got that tattooed to 0:18:40.560 --> 0:18:48.560 honor Susan. And yeah, that's such a wild wild that 0:18:48.640 --> 0:18:53.040 you have, right, But my life is very I guess 0:18:53.080 --> 0:18:56.400 my last question is, um, I have a birthday coming up, 0:18:56.680 --> 0:19:00.560 and I'm just kidding. Yeah, sure a will I mean, 0:19:00.600 --> 0:19:02.679 if you want to hire me one percent. I'm very 0:19:02.680 --> 0:19:04.720 good at it now. I got very efficient at it. 0:19:05.040 --> 0:19:07.640 Like I had systems, I had spreadsheets, I'd checklist, I'd 0:19:07.680 --> 0:19:11.520 like setlists, I'd call times like everybody get called times 0:19:11.520 --> 0:19:13.960 and ship like I ran that ship like it was 0:19:14.000 --> 0:19:17.480 a goddamn production to hand. Like. It makes so much 0:19:17.520 --> 0:19:20.960 sense that that a stage manager would would have the 0:19:21.040 --> 0:19:25.600 necessary skills to also produce an orgy A shocking amount 0:19:25.760 --> 0:19:30.960 of crossover between running an orgy and running a renaissance festival, 0:19:31.000 --> 0:19:33.240 which is what I did before the pandemic. It's the 0:19:33.280 --> 0:19:36.240 same thing, just with less sex. But there's the same 0:19:36.240 --> 0:19:39.280 amount of coordination, honestly, and for an actor, you know, 0:19:39.400 --> 0:19:41.639 like there's nerves before the show. You gotta warm up, 0:19:41.640 --> 0:19:44.000 you gotta stretch, you gotta like loosen up, you know, 0:19:44.119 --> 0:19:47.520 and then the show is essentially the sex. The show 0:19:47.640 --> 0:19:49.480 is just the sex. Yeah, and it's like and who's 0:19:49.520 --> 0:19:52.359 bringing the snacks, who's taking out the garbage? Like what's 0:19:52.400 --> 0:19:56.199 the dress code at the end? Clap it up for everyone? 0:19:56.520 --> 0:19:59.480 Interpersonal communication, you know, because there's always like the one 0:19:59.760 --> 0:20:02.080 x like shows up that you know, and then they're like, 0:20:02.080 --> 0:20:04.919 oh no, well Bill's here, I gotta go, and you're like, no, 0:20:05.119 --> 0:20:07.600 just going. You know, there's a lot of there's a 0:20:07.640 --> 0:20:12.240 lot of consoling excess that happened in that job. Oh 0:20:12.320 --> 0:20:16.320 I can imagine. Yeah, Like, yeah, the crossover of xs 0:20:16.480 --> 0:20:18.960 has got to be a lot of a lot of 0:20:18.960 --> 0:20:24.560 crossover in the orgy community. It's a tight knit community, 0:20:24.760 --> 0:20:27.000 it's true, but I mean the most like I've told 0:20:27.000 --> 0:20:29.520 this story like a couple of times, like parties and stuff, 0:20:29.560 --> 0:20:32.720 and the real thing that I think people are like 0:20:32.760 --> 0:20:36.200 fascinated bias. There's always one person who goes so like, 0:20:36.560 --> 0:20:41.000 how many orgies happen like just around me, like like 0:20:41.000 --> 0:20:44.200 like without and I'm like, far more than you think, 0:20:44.720 --> 0:20:47.359 far more, far more orgies are happening around you at 0:20:47.359 --> 0:20:49.880 any given time than you might ever ever know. You're 0:20:49.920 --> 0:20:52.640 just yeah, you're just not getting the right invites. It's 0:20:52.720 --> 0:20:56.600 it's like spiders. There's the every orgy within eight feet 0:20:56.640 --> 0:21:00.119 of you at all times. Statistically, sometimes they crawl in 0:21:00.119 --> 0:21:11.679 your mouth when you sleep. Now, that is a birthday party, 0:21:11.920 --> 0:21:14.119 you know what I mean. When I'm in my mid seventies, 0:21:14.200 --> 0:21:17.560 I hope I have half of Susan stamina. Hopefully she's 0:21:17.560 --> 0:21:20.880