Speaker 1: Hello, Hi, Hi, What is your name?
Speaker 2: Emilie?
Speaker 1: Like the Little Wing song Amelia? What's going on? How
Speaker 1: can I get you? Today?
Speaker 2: It's going pretty good. I got a lot of new
Speaker 2: shoes today and it's the weekend. Anyways, I texted you
Speaker 2: like I fis jumped people on the weekend and people
Speaker 2: don't seem to get it.
Speaker 1: You fist bump people on the weekends, and they don't
Speaker 1: seem to get it.
Speaker 2: Yeah, like they think it's an entire social experiment thing.
Speaker 2: Like I started recording myself because people were asking where
Speaker 2: the camera is. I just like, I like fisting people.
Speaker 1: Uh, in what context are you fist bumping these people?
Speaker 2: Like I just stand on a corner, I like get
Speaker 2: ridiculously high and I just fssbump people like I offer
Speaker 2: a fist pump for them to take it.
Speaker 1: How long are you typically doing this for per session?
Speaker 2: A couple hours tend to.
Speaker 1: One typically, so like three hours. Yeah, so you're sitting
Speaker 1: there for three hours.
Speaker 2: I'm just standing just getting high, yeah, and just people
Speaker 2: watching kind of it's like.
Speaker 1: Watching is it? Is it the corner of a busy street?
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, it's it's pretty much downtown, like where bars
Speaker 2: intersect what city I'd like to not stay I can
Speaker 2: tell you privately, but I'd like to not stay on
Speaker 2: the phone because I feel like that would identify me.
Speaker 1: Do you not want to be identified? Do you not
Speaker 1: want to like be known as the fist pump guy?
Speaker 2: I mean, like I'm already kind of known as a
Speaker 2: system guy around town, but like that's pretty much it.
Speaker 2: Like I just I don't want to be recognized. I
Speaker 2: just want to get people systems.
Speaker 1: You really, by the way, listen, obviously you don't have
Speaker 1: to tell me if it want to, but you really
Speaker 1: think people are going to be able to identify you
Speaker 1: by if by like how would they identify you?
Speaker 2: Because I'm the only guy that does it. Like I'm
Speaker 2: like I've been I've been identified by people I know
Speaker 2: because I'm close to my hometown.
Speaker 1: Like how often do you do this?
Speaker 2: I do this every weekend. I've been doing it for
Speaker 2: a year, and I think this is the last year
Speaker 2: because it's like I'm going to like I'm twenty, no
Speaker 2: twenty one, it's going to be twenty two later on
Speaker 2: this year, and like I feel like this is like
Speaker 2: the last bits of like oh yeah, he's just like
Speaker 2: he's cool, Like that does that make sense? Like it's
Speaker 2: the last college kind of year. I didn't go to college, but.
Speaker 1: Yeah, no, that doesn't make sense. What are you? Are? You?
Speaker 1: Are you? Why is this the last year that you
Speaker 1: will be face of fist bumping people on the corner
Speaker 1: for two hours getting stones.
Speaker 2: Because like it's the last collegey year, Like I don't know,
Speaker 2: I don't know, I'm I'm gonna be twenty two. Like
Speaker 2: I don't want to be doing this for forever. I
Speaker 2: just like the feeling it gives me. Now does that
Speaker 2: make sense?
Speaker 1: That makes sense? What why don't you just keep doing
Speaker 1: it until you really don't enjoy it anymore?
Speaker 2: Because like I'd like to leave it on a high note.
Speaker 2: I don't want I don't want it to like just
Speaker 2: I don't want to how I met your mother. I
Speaker 2: want to, like, you know, give it a good ending
Speaker 2: and I just stop all of a sudden.
Speaker 1: You don't want to jump the shark.
Speaker 2: No, I don't want to jump the shark. I don't want.
Speaker 2: I don't want this to like be like, oh, this
Speaker 2: is getting fucking annoying, this is becoming a burden, which
Speaker 2: like at some point I've kind of felt like that,
Speaker 2: but I still enjoyed it in the end, So like
Speaker 2: I kind of recognized this as like almost running its course.
Speaker 1: So once per week? Are do you do this multiple
Speaker 1: times per weekend? Or this is one?
Speaker 2: I do this twice per week for every I do
Speaker 2: this Friday Saturday all night.
Speaker 1: From what hours.
Speaker 2: I told you, from about ten to.
Speaker 1: One ten pm to one am.
Speaker 2: Yes, this is a night actual. Like with other adults,
Speaker 2: I've been hit on by like both genders, I've and
Speaker 2: multiple others that I don't even recognize, and like I
Speaker 2: just brush them all off, and like I just I mean,
Speaker 2: I've had a girl whisper in my ear I need
Speaker 2: to experience you before and I'm like no, And she
Speaker 2: just ended up making out with another guy across the
Speaker 2: street to try and make me jealous. She was throwing
Speaker 2: her hands in the air after the other guy lefter.
Speaker 1: How did that make you feel?
Speaker 2: Like, Oh, I'm just another guy. So it didn't matter
Speaker 2: in the end. If anything, I'm happier now because she's upset.
Speaker 1: Okay, so you brush them up? Do you brush all
Speaker 1: these people off? Because your one and only goal is
Speaker 1: to do the fist bumps and anything other than that
Speaker 1: would just get in your way.
Speaker 3: That.
Speaker 2: And also I just don't like the idea of satellites,
Speaker 2: if that makes any sense, I don't want.
Speaker 1: Any sense at all. I have no idea what you mean.
Speaker 2: By that, Like I don't want any moons or anything
Speaker 2: that are like that around me. Like I'm just a
Speaker 2: lone planet by myself. Like I don't know. I don't
Speaker 2: like the idea of friends is very appealing, but at
Speaker 2: the same time, it's like, no, I'm okay, So I
Speaker 2: just like people. I talk with people. It's not like
Speaker 2: I have a hard time talking with people. People tell
Speaker 2: me I'm great at like talking with people, but like
Speaker 2: I just don't like repeated people. Does that make sense?
Speaker 1: So okay, all right, first let's talk like that. Wow,
Speaker 1: this is we could actually talk about this for an hour.
Speaker 1: So you okay, Let's start with the like relationship thing.
Speaker 4: Are you?
Speaker 1: Like are you? Are you a sexual?
Speaker 2: I believe so, Like I just like I don't. I've
Speaker 2: had sex before. I don't find any like real entertainment
Speaker 2: in that, Like I'd rather just get to know the
Speaker 2: person on a deeper level. But at the same time,
Speaker 2: in order for that deeper level, people like traditionally, at
Speaker 2: least like people have intimacy, and like, I just don't
Speaker 2: get it.
Speaker 1: Would you rather have sex with a person or fist
Speaker 1: bump them.
Speaker 2: I can't answer that question because like I like giving
Speaker 2: the fist bumps, but at the end of the day,
Speaker 2: that's all it is. And like it's cool that somebody
Speaker 2: wants to have sex with me, but at the end
Speaker 2: of the day, it's like, Okay, I had sex with
Speaker 2: this person.
Speaker 5: Does that make sense?
Speaker 2: I'm very indifferent to both outcomes.
Speaker 1: Do you feel like it's like, is a fist bump
Speaker 1: and sex on the same level of intimacy for you?
Speaker 2: No, sex is more intimate, but like it's like I
Speaker 2: don't know, I just don't want Like I don't know,
Speaker 2: I like it. I kind of feel almost like a
Speaker 2: novelty to people. Does that make sense?
Speaker 1: Okay? I have a lot of more I have a
Speaker 1: lot of questions, but I want to talk about this
Speaker 1: because I haven't gotten this to this yet. When you
Speaker 1: try to fist pump people, how often do they accept
Speaker 1: versus rebuff your offer of the fist bump.
Speaker 2: I'd say it's probably like a forty sixty split to
Speaker 2: sixty acknowledging it and forty like either just rejecting it
Speaker 2: or acknowledging it and but not giving you the fist pumps.
Speaker 1: What do you think of those forty percent of people
Speaker 1: who reject the fist bump.
Speaker 2: It's very different depending on the person. Like if it's
Speaker 2: a couple out, like if it's a guy and a girl,
Speaker 2: if the girl fistblumps me, I feel like, oh, okay, bro,
Speaker 2: I kind of pointed something out for you, just depending
Speaker 2: on the way she kind of goes about it. If
Speaker 2: the guy initiates the fist bump, it's like, okay, this
Speaker 2: is indifferent. And then if a girl reciprocates, it's like, okay,
Speaker 2: she's acknowledged that this is behavior. Does that make sense?
Speaker 1: So when like, okay, So if a guy and a
Speaker 1: girl are walking by you and you're about to give
Speaker 1: them a fist bump, and the girl initiates the fist bump,
Speaker 1: you said, Oh, I feel like I just pointed something
Speaker 1: out for you. What does that mean?
Speaker 2: Well, like, I've I've had many girls give me a
Speaker 2: fist bump. Some of them are just by themselves, and
Speaker 2: that's perfectly fine, they can fist bump whoever. And then
Speaker 2: I've had girls that are with their partners and then
Speaker 2: you can kind of tell when it's mutual, and then
Speaker 2: you can kind of tell when like the girl is
Speaker 2: not is more interested in you than the partner.
Speaker 1: So you you feel like if like a girl tries
Speaker 1: to you feel like if a girl tries to if
Speaker 1: you feel like if a girl tries to fist bump you,
Speaker 1: I mean she's more into you than her partner.
Speaker 2: It's like the Dave Chappelle skit, Like it's where he's
Speaker 2: talking about like like consensual things like oh, she said, no,
Speaker 2: no stop it, don't do that, and then the court
Speaker 2: reporter reads it back, no, no stop it, don't do that.
Speaker 2: Like it We're getting on the concepts and the body
Speaker 2: language in the girl.
Speaker 1: Okay, we're getting a little off track here, but what okay,
Speaker 1: all right, have you made okay, I have more quiet?
Speaker 1: Have you got have you ever gotten into trouble with this?
Speaker 1: Have you ever like.
Speaker 2: There's been uh, like no legal trouble. Like the cops
Speaker 2: know that I do this. They're they're on the same
Speaker 2: page as me. They've asked me before. I'm like, I
Speaker 2: just do this because I like doing it. And then like,
Speaker 2: as far as drunk people go, most people are really chill.
Speaker 2: I think I've had like five incidents in total. I've
Speaker 2: had a guy spit on my hand, but I don't
Speaker 2: escalate stuff because like I don't know if they can fight,
Speaker 2: and I don't want any trouble with any of the
Speaker 2: club's bars or or police. I've had a guy like
Speaker 2: walk around and I feel like he was just self
Speaker 2: hating himself at that time, because he just kept walked
Speaker 2: around like five times, just saying fuck you to me
Speaker 2: multiple times. And like I had my phone stolen like
Speaker 2: two weekends ago by some black chick and like it
Speaker 2: was a fat one. Of course, all her friends were
Speaker 2: laughing at her, and she just what's up?
Speaker 4: All right?
Speaker 1: Uh, let's talk about this. You like, are you cool?
Speaker 1: This whole thing of like you do?
Speaker 2: You?
Speaker 1: Like? Do not want friends? Do you?
Speaker 2: I don't feel.
Speaker 1: What the fist pumping thing gives to me the impression
Speaker 1: that you do desire social contact.
Speaker 2: Yeah, like I do want to be around people, but
Speaker 2: I just don't want friends.
Speaker 1: Why do you not want friends?
Speaker 2: Severe abandonment issues by previous friends?
Speaker 1: When was this.
Speaker 2: Three years ago?
Speaker 1: Yeah, you felt abandoned, But how did you feel abandoned
Speaker 1: by your friends?
Speaker 2: Well, like we all kind of graduated, and I knew
Speaker 2: that everybody was going to go their own separate ways,
Speaker 2: but it was when they started when they kept on
Speaker 2: hanging out with people that were getting them in like
Speaker 2: legal trouble in the city that I'm in, because they
Speaker 2: went to different cities, but like they'd come back and
Speaker 2: then like hang out at home and they'd have to
Speaker 2: go through my city to do both. And it's like, huh,
Speaker 2: they're hanging out with that guy, but they're not hanging
Speaker 2: out with you, And like you purpose, you try and
Speaker 2: hang out with these people and talk with them and
Speaker 2: like send them Christmas messages or like holiday messages or
Speaker 2: fuck birthday messages because I get Facebook notifications and I
Speaker 2: like the ideas of Christmas cards and that kind of stuff.
Speaker 2: So like you just send them like a quick note,
Speaker 2: and then like they don't respond and they don't like
Speaker 2: invite you to other things. How the first party that
Speaker 2: I went to, people were surprised I went there, and
Speaker 2: they were people that I would have considered friends at
Speaker 2: the time.
Speaker 1: So you're a so you don't want to make friends
Speaker 1: because you're afraid that your friends will like leave you.
Speaker 2: I guess. But at the same time, It's like I'm
Speaker 2: kind of past that. Like I just don't like in
Speaker 2: order for me to have a relationship, I feel like
Speaker 2: there has to be a function in order like to
Speaker 2: have the relationship.
Speaker 1: Like you need to provide them something both.
Speaker 2: Ways, Yeah, like they need something done and I can
Speaker 2: provide it, or I need something done and they can
Speaker 2: provide it.
Speaker 1: What do you mean by you need something done? Like, like,
Speaker 1: like do you mean in the most do you mean
Speaker 1: in the literal sense of like I'm gonna be friends
Speaker 1: with this it guy because you can fix my computer?
Speaker 2: Yeah, And I'm going to like hang out with him
Speaker 2: and I'm going to invite him over. I'm if he smokes,
Speaker 2: if he smokes pot, I'm going to smoke pot with him,
Speaker 2: and like we're going to hang out in that kind
Speaker 2: of sense. Like, I don't know, I don't know how
Speaker 2: to better explain this.
Speaker 1: Okay, how long have you felt like this?
Speaker 2: Three years plus?
Speaker 1: And genuinely I'm curious is this like is this like
Speaker 1: an issue in life that that you like really struggle
Speaker 1: with or is it just kind of like like how
Speaker 1: do you how do you even see this issue? Like
Speaker 1: is this a problem for you or you just kind
Speaker 1: of like, oh, that's that's that part of my life.
Speaker 2: I don't know. It's because like everybody I meet, they're
Speaker 2: like they tell me similarly, Oh, you're a pretty cool guy.
Speaker 2: You know how to talk with people you like, and
Speaker 2: like people seem to genuinely like me. My boss is,
Speaker 2: my co workers, like previous are previous people that I've known,
Speaker 2: they seem to find great. I don't want to say interest,
Speaker 2: because that would mean that they would know things about me,
Speaker 2: but like they seem to like me, and like, I
Speaker 2: just don't get it, and like I dissistant people because
Speaker 2: it's the simplest, like it's just a systump, don't overthink it,
Speaker 2: and people overthink it.
Speaker 1: So it's your it's your like way of getting getting
Speaker 1: just enough socializing. You're getting just enough socializing, just enough
Speaker 1: intimacy that uh, they don't get too close and then
Speaker 1: like everything gets fucked up. Yes, huh have you ever
Speaker 1: been to a real therapist to talk about this?
Speaker 2: I have, but not about well. I've actually told my
Speaker 2: last therapist yes, and he just kind of told me
Speaker 2: that so long as I'm not putting myself or others
Speaker 2: in danger, I'm okay.
Speaker 1: That's fucking stupid. I mean, like, I'm glad that you're
Speaker 1: not putting yourself for others in danger.
Speaker 2: I'm at that point.
Speaker 1: Yeah, okay, all right, good, But like, are you did
Speaker 1: he give you any advice on how to like build
Speaker 1: a uh like legitimate social life or overcome any of
Speaker 1: these hang ups?
Speaker 2: No, gave me lit motorgene.
Speaker 1: That's a medication, right, yes, okay, how's that going for you?
Speaker 2: I stopped taking it because exercise seemed to be working better,
Speaker 2: and I've been.
Speaker 1: Right, Okay, what have you like tried to do anything
Speaker 1: to get over these hang ups?
Speaker 2: I mean, like i'd meet out with a girl before,
Speaker 2: but like I kind of bled all over her face.
Speaker 1: Okay, I have Okay, first of all, that's what do
Speaker 1: you what do you mean you bled on her face.
Speaker 2: Like I had an anime moment.
Speaker 1: You you were like you had an animemo where your
Speaker 1: nose started just bleeding. Because yeah, girl, yeah, that's pretty funny.
Speaker 1: That has nothing to do with what we were just
Speaker 1: talking about. By the way, because you can make out.
Speaker 2: That was just a really good deflection.
Speaker 1: That was it was a good fight because again, you
Speaker 1: can make out with, you can make out with, to
Speaker 1: quote Froggy Fresh, this is a deep cut. You can
Speaker 1: make out with every girl in the world and uh
Speaker 1: it won't fucking I don't think fix Like whatever mental
Speaker 1: hang ups you have.
Speaker 2: Is it like ultimately like I used to like believe
Speaker 2: in that toxic bullshit where like I needed like another person,
Speaker 2: but like now I just kind of like I want
Speaker 2: to do it by myself, but it's just so hard
Speaker 2: and like you need people. But like I just I
Speaker 2: don't think I was socialized or talk to socialize.
Speaker 1: With people my age, like when you were a kid.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Like I just I really like adults. Like I
Speaker 2: like talking with older people, and like they like talking
Speaker 2: to me, but like they look at they see me
Speaker 2: and I'm just a child, so like I can't really
Speaker 2: mess with them. But at the same time, because of
Speaker 2: the way I talk, I can't mess with younger people.
Speaker 1: Do you go to Uh okay, so you didn't go
Speaker 1: to college. What do you do? Do you work?
Speaker 2: Uh? Yeah, I do work. I have a state license.
Speaker 2: And that's all I'm going to go into into with
Speaker 2: that one that.
Speaker 1: You have a state license with Do you do you
Speaker 1: kill people? Do you have a license to kill?
Speaker 2: No? No, no, I don't have a license to kill
Speaker 2: that's no. I don't have a lice. I'm not a
Speaker 2: bounty hunter or anything like that, but I do have
Speaker 2: something I didn't.
Speaker 1: I didn't think you were about the Hunter, although that
Speaker 1: would be a funny way to coax your bounties to you,
Speaker 1: is by offering free fist on the corner. No, I'm
Speaker 1: not a single part of my being thought that you
Speaker 1: were about the hunter?
Speaker 2: Was it the way I sound? I feel like I
Speaker 2: sound like a Teddy Bear.
Speaker 1: I wouldn't say that, and I would also not say
Speaker 1: you sound like a bounty hunter. Is it fishing? Do
Speaker 1: you fish? Or whatever? I'll stop trying to guess what
Speaker 1: you do, but tell me this, do you I mean like, like,
Speaker 1: do you do you feel like you like have a
Speaker 1: well rounded life outside of that?
Speaker 2: Probably not. I mean, like I like to exercise, It's
Speaker 2: been a while since I've exercise. I like playing video games.
Speaker 2: I recently got into into inter clothes, so I'm trying
Speaker 2: to figure that stuff out. And like, I have other interests,
Speaker 2: but like I've kind of lost interest in a lot
Speaker 2: of things that I wanted to do as time goes by,
Speaker 2: and I've just kind of been living a meth life.
Speaker 2: So yeah, I like playing chess. I play chess in public.
Speaker 2: Not a lot of people do play chess.
Speaker 1: It's funny, man, because I actually really like a lot
Speaker 1: of these like the fist bump thing and the chess thing.
Speaker 1: It's like, I actually really like the way that you're
Speaker 1: putting yourself out there.
Speaker 2: Like it's not like I'm not putting myself out there,
Speaker 2: but like, at the same time, I just don't want
Speaker 2: to Like I don't want to use the word tarnish
Speaker 2: because that would imply that I'm ruining somebody. And I'm
Speaker 2: not ruining somebody, But I just don't want to make
Speaker 2: these friendships and and like just have them like ripped
Speaker 2: apart by the other person.
Speaker 1: I feel like there's a lot of songs written about
Speaker 1: this where it's, yeah.
Speaker 5: I.
Speaker 1: Don't want to love. I don't want to love because
Speaker 1: then I'll just get my heart broken again. And then
Speaker 1: at the end it's like, but I gotta love.
Speaker 2: You know, yeah, Like it's not a unique emotion. I'm
Speaker 2: not I'm not clung myself like some kind of fucking
Speaker 2: butterfly or anything like that. It's not a unique emotion.
Speaker 2: But like, at the same time, like I seem to
Speaker 2: be the only person that expresses it this way.
Speaker 1: You are the only person I've ever talked to that
Speaker 1: has expressed this by uh doing fist bumps on the
Speaker 1: corner every weekend from ten pm to one am. That
Speaker 1: is true, That is very true. Uh, there are way
Speaker 1: but but also there you know, other people express these
Speaker 1: thoughts by killing people.
Speaker 2: So I like the I mean, you're dressed as a
Speaker 2: get go talking to me.
Speaker 1: I am dressed as a gecko talking to you, which
Speaker 1: is really not that far off from giving fist bumps.
Speaker 2: No, it really isn't. Like yeah, and you should listen
Speaker 2: to you should start painting your face red.
Speaker 1: Okay, Well I'm more offended by that than anything else
Speaker 1: that you've said, of course, of this call anyway. Shit, man,
Speaker 1: I don't know what to tell you about that feeling.
Speaker 1: I really don't because it's uh uh it's hard. I
Speaker 1: don't I really really don't know how to deal with
Speaker 1: that feeling. My best working theory is that and I
Speaker 1: think I talked about this on a previous episode of
Speaker 1: the podcast, and I've been thinking about it a lot
Speaker 1: in my personal life. The whole idea of I don't
Speaker 1: want to like any I don't want to bring any
Speaker 1: friends into my life. I don't want to bring any
Speaker 1: love into my life because I'm afraid that it will
Speaker 1: go away or it will hurt me. You could bring
Speaker 1: that back to this general idea of like I'm not
Speaker 1: gonna let myself experience joy or experience anything because the
Speaker 1: experience of these positive feelings will inevitably, uh you know,
Speaker 1: fuck me and lead to nothing, or I'll lead to
Speaker 1: lead to heartbreak. It's like I don't want to get
Speaker 1: a puppy because in nine years or whatever, it's gonna
Speaker 1: die and I'll.
Speaker 2: Be like, at least with the dog. It kind of
Speaker 2: goes back into.
Speaker 1: Yes, I know, the semantics aside the whole idea though,
Speaker 1: right of like I don't want to let myself be
Speaker 1: happy because then I'm gonna get fucked. I've been thinking
Speaker 1: about this forever. I do the same thing. I really do.
Speaker 1: I really really prevent myself from enjoying things because I'm
Speaker 1: afraid that uh, it'll it'll backfire, turn into shit or whatever.
Speaker 1: And so I understand like the like being in that
Speaker 1: place emotionally, but when I like step back and I
Speaker 1: like kind of look at it, I like, really logically,
Speaker 1: I'm like, that's such a fucking stupid way to live.
Speaker 2: Because you need people, like people are getting you.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you need people. People are good for you. And
Speaker 1: it's also but again larger than that, it's like you're
Speaker 1: just gonna like never do anything. You're gonna be screwed
Speaker 1: the day because of the day you're gonna die.
Speaker 2: So and they're gonna be alone, and nobody's gonna give
Speaker 2: a about your grade.
Speaker 1: Yeah like yes, so so so okay, yeah, so hold on.
Speaker 1: So so it's okay. Logically, I can look at it
Speaker 1: and I can go that's a really dumb way to live,
Speaker 1: not allowing yourself to be happy or experience friendship or
Speaker 1: experience whatever other thing, because it's gonna bite you in
Speaker 1: the end. And like what, You're gonna die at the
Speaker 1: end of the day, so you're fuck no matter what
Speaker 1: you do. That's the that's I just have that logical conclusion.
Speaker 1: I just come to that conclusion. That's it's a dumb
Speaker 1: way to It is.
Speaker 2: A stupid way to live because like the opposite of
Speaker 2: emotions is indifference, and like it's it's just shitty to
Speaker 2: be indifferent because at that point you're just a machine.
Speaker 2: And I'm not a machine. But at the same time,
Speaker 2: it's like, well, like it's all gonna end eventually, and
Speaker 2: like I just don't care enough about people to like
Speaker 2: actually want to have be in their lives or have
Speaker 2: them be in my life life.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't know.
Speaker 1: I don't know. I don't. I really I don't know
Speaker 1: how to get over that. I really don't. It's like
Speaker 1: a it's it's I mean.
Speaker 2: And and I forgot to mention. I forgot to mention
Speaker 2: when I started doing this a year ago, I was
Speaker 2: working in that area and I adopted I asked if
Speaker 2: I could adopt a red bow tie into my all
Speaker 2: black uniform. I was, I was, I was a butcher
Speaker 2: at a restaurant. I was the only person to do that,
Speaker 2: and people fucking loved it. And then after that, I
Speaker 2: kin like I was twenty so I couldn't go to bars,
Speaker 2: and that's why I started posting up and just to
Speaker 2: like feel associated with.
Speaker 1: The Yeah, you're like, I just want to be associated
Speaker 1: with the nightlife.
Speaker 2: Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 1: Yeah. I liked the fist bump thing. I really do.
Speaker 1: I think it's Yeah, I mean, look I do that.
Speaker 1: I do that thing where I go outside and dress
Speaker 1: up as a gecko and chat with folks, and it's
Speaker 1: really the same fucking idea. So yeah, I like that idea.
Speaker 1: How do you care? I don't. I don't know. I've
Speaker 1: been trying to think that. I've been trying to figure
Speaker 1: that out myself. Maybe it's like maybe it's something chemical,
Speaker 1: Maybe it's a depression.
Speaker 5: I mean, like they've I've been told that I'm like
Speaker 5: I'm depressed, but like I just don't believe it. I
Speaker 5: just don't think I've I've been able to like have
Speaker 5: those relationships with people, either because they were like the
Speaker 5: incorrect people, because people were debating over how I should
Speaker 5: have those kinds of interactions so that I just didn't
Speaker 5: interact in general, or just because like I don't know.
Speaker 1: M Yeah, what do you think you're gonna do?
Speaker 2: I think I'm gonna go and get ready. I'm gonna
Speaker 2: shower because I smell like a fucking god kind of
Speaker 2: not you know what. I'm not even gonna plug that
Speaker 2: sponsorship in because I'm not sponsored by them and neither
Speaker 2: are you, and uh, I'm going to go. I've been
Speaker 2: told that I'm very attractive by both sexes, Like I
Speaker 2: told you, Okay, all right, and I'm going to go
Speaker 2: get ready for that. And then I'm going to go
Speaker 2: downtown at about ten thirty and just go get really
Speaker 2: fucking high, and you got to fist bump people, and
Speaker 2: I'm going to face some people.
Speaker 1: Yep, Okay, yeah, I don't think.
Speaker 2: It's been too broke to drink, but I'm going to smoke.
Speaker 2: I have a lot of weeds.
Speaker 1: We'll have a good time. Man, I don't know. I listened.
Speaker 1: I like the fist bump thing, but fuck, man, I
Speaker 1: don't know. You're talking about a lot of stuff that
Speaker 1: I think about. The answers to a lot. But I've
Speaker 1: come out.
Speaker 2: If you want to try and figure this out, what
Speaker 2: we can nice, sure you have my phone numbers.
Speaker 1: Well listen, man, enjoy your fist bumps and h fuck.
Speaker 1: I was trying to think of something in our call
Speaker 1: the reference at the end, but whatever, what's your name again?
Speaker 2: Or a million? Like the song like the song.
Speaker 1: Why did you want?
Speaker 3: Hey?
Speaker 1: You have wan? My final my final recommendation. What about
Speaker 1: you ever thought about monetizing this? You ever thought about
Speaker 1: maybe a tip jar?
Speaker 2: Like I've had a guy throw a dollar at me
Speaker 2: and I gave him that dollar back and then like
Speaker 2: I just did I'm not a.
Speaker 1: Strippery for the love of the game. I know that
Speaker 1: you do.
Speaker 2: It like like I do it for the love of
Speaker 2: the game. Like I just really like this jumping people,
Speaker 2: And like I think I said this earlier, but I've
Speaker 2: only recently started to record myself because people were asking
Speaker 2: me like why I'm not recording myself or if it's
Speaker 2: a social experiment, or like what am I? What are
Speaker 2: you doing? Like I'll be this mumping people and then
Speaker 2: they'll like shove their hand underneath mine, and they'll like
Speaker 2: they're expecting something and I just either ate this one
Speaker 2: their hand or be ignored them.
Speaker 1: Is there anything else? Who I say to the people
Speaker 1: of the computer before we go?
Speaker 2: Okay, I guess I'll just throw myself out there. I
Speaker 2: guess if you're ever in Tucson, by all means, go downtown.
Speaker 2: I'll be there for the next year.
Speaker 1: Take care of Milly, you two, Lyle, goodbye. I do
Speaker 1: like the fist bump thing. It really is the same
Speaker 1: energy as like, uh going out as a gecko to
Speaker 1: chat with people. It's just something to something to like
Speaker 1: interact with folks. Yak hi there, how can I get
Speaker 1: you today?
Speaker 6: So I live with my boyfriend and something that I've
Speaker 6: always been like really proud of him forwards, like how
Speaker 6: clean he is. But this past weekend we went a
Speaker 6: little bit of a bender and and I found a
Speaker 6: piss jar in our apartment. And it's fucking foul.
Speaker 1: How much piss was in the piss.
Speaker 6: Jar, like a big mason jar. Sorry, I'm like shaking,
Speaker 6: I'm nervous, Like go ahead, like a massive piss jar,
Speaker 6: like a thirty six ounce piss.
Speaker 1: Thirty six ounces of piss? How many ounces are in
Speaker 1: a pint? No clue, that's like how many pints is that?
Speaker 1: Do you have any You don't have any idea.
Speaker 6: A solid like cort container of piss.
Speaker 1: You So you found a quart of piss?
Speaker 6: Well yeah, it was like a mason jar, but it's
Speaker 6: like about the size of a court container.
Speaker 1: Where did you find it?
Speaker 6: In our bedroom?
Speaker 1: Where in the bedroom on his like uh okaus in
Speaker 1: the open? Yeah okay, you waited on his drawers or
Speaker 1: inside of the drawers.
Speaker 6: On the like on top of the dresser drawers.
Speaker 1: Okay, So he has a he's a nightstand, and you
Speaker 1: found a court of piss on his nightstand, just sitting
Speaker 1: on the night stand next to his lamp and his
Speaker 1: alarm clock and his phone charger. A court of piss, Yes, okay,
Speaker 1: that's not exactly a hidden court of how do you know?
Speaker 1: What do you mean you've found? Like, how can you
Speaker 1: have been how can you have been sleeping next to
Speaker 1: this guy for that long and not noticed that there
Speaker 1: was one thing if you were like snooping through his drawers?
Speaker 1: But are you sure you're telling me this right? It
Speaker 1: was on the nightstand.
Speaker 3: No.
Speaker 6: That's the thing too that I don't understand, because so
Speaker 6: I woke up, went to work in the morning, came home,
Speaker 6: didn't go up into the bedroom that's like on the
Speaker 6: second floor, and got into bed, and I was like,
Speaker 6: what is that fucking? And then I look over and
Speaker 6: it's just sitting there. So it's like, how did I
Speaker 6: not see it in the morning when I woke up
Speaker 6: to go to work, Like, but I.
Speaker 1: Just I don't know this. This really isn't adding up
Speaker 1: to me. He has the piss jar on his nightstand? Yes,
Speaker 1: and how long has it been there for?
Speaker 6: I mean, it was a lot of piss. I'd never
Speaker 6: seen it before. I don't I mean, I don't know
Speaker 6: how that much piss could have been accumulated through like
Speaker 6: one night is my main concern because I don't.
Speaker 1: Know did you confront him about it? Did you talk
Speaker 1: to him about it?
Speaker 6: So he was downstairs with our friend and I literally
Speaker 6: just grabbed a pissjure smelled it because I was like,
Speaker 6: is this beer or something? Smelled it definitely pissed, came
Speaker 6: downstairs and just like dropped in front of him, and
Speaker 6: I was like, this is fucking disgusting. I never want
Speaker 6: to see this again, Like, never do this again. He's
Speaker 6: thirty eight, he's a grown man, Like he doesn't need
Speaker 6: to be doing that. It just go peeky, we have
Speaker 6: a bathroom, be civilized.
Speaker 1: You grabbed the pissed jar like you held it long enough.
Speaker 1: You held it for the duration of a full walk
Speaker 1: down the stairs. Yes, was it warm?
Speaker 6: No room tempt.
Speaker 1: How How did he react when you confronted him about it?
Speaker 6: He looked mortified, reasonably.
Speaker 1: Did he have anything to say for himself?
Speaker 6: He grabbed it from me and said, we are never
Speaker 6: talking about this again. But I've brought it up multiple
Speaker 6: times just because like I'll think of it, like it's
Speaker 6: just like bent on my mind, you know, like that's disgusting.
Speaker 1: Do you have anything like that in the house. No,
Speaker 1: Like do you have like a you don't have You
Speaker 1: don't have your own piss blood pissed jar or period
Speaker 1: blood jar.
Speaker 6: I have a trash can next to the toilet, but
Speaker 6: I respectfully wrap up my tampon like an adult.
Speaker 1: Okay, that is that is respectful, that is adults. That
Speaker 1: is good. That's a good thing. Okay, So it does this?
Speaker 1: Does this pose a problem for you? Is to say?
Speaker 1: Is this a deal breaker? Or is this if you
Speaker 1: found another by the way? Just I okay, we really
Speaker 1: haven't I dude, I really need you to get into
Speaker 1: this with me because I can't get over it. It was
Speaker 1: on the nightstand and you didn't see it.
Speaker 6: Correct, I didn't see it until I crawled into bed
Speaker 6: that night.
Speaker 1: How long has it been sitting on that night stand
Speaker 1: for it?
Speaker 6: No clue, I don't know. If he start?
Speaker 1: How big is your do you have like a really
Speaker 1: big bed and so when you look to your right
Speaker 1: you can't see that. I don't get it.
Speaker 4: No, I don't know.
Speaker 6: I don't know either, Like, I don't know how I
Speaker 6: didn't see it, like because it's a lot of piss,
Speaker 6: Like it's more piss than you would just do in
Speaker 6: like one night, like two am piss.
Speaker 4: You know what I mean.
Speaker 6: So, I don't know how I didn't see it the
Speaker 6: night prior we were drinking, So maybe I just wasn't
Speaker 6: paying attention, But like, how did I not see it
Speaker 6: in the morning? So did he have it hidden? Then
Speaker 6: he brought it out for me, just presented for me
Speaker 6: to see when I went to bed that night.
Speaker 1: I mean, I got I got another I got another
Speaker 1: idea for you. Are you sure that that's one hundred
Speaker 1: percent his piss? Could it be?
Speaker 2: It?
Speaker 1: Could? I mean, there's a lot of theories. It could
Speaker 1: be some of his friend's piss. I don't want to
Speaker 1: throw I mean, this is kind of a wild accusation,
Speaker 1: but you know, it could be a mistress's piss. That's
Speaker 1: try saying that ten times a mistress's piss'd be hard.
Speaker 1: It could be it could be other people's piss it
Speaker 1: combined into one jar. Because you do have sufficient uh uh,
Speaker 1: you do have a reasonable doubt that one man could
Speaker 1: produce all that piss. And well you don't even know, well, okay,
Speaker 1: you don't even know how long that jar has been
Speaker 1: up there. That jar could have came with the fucking
Speaker 1: house when you rented it.
Speaker 6: It could have been like I smelled it, you know,
Speaker 6: and like I'm not that, you know, like I like
Speaker 6: to think, I don't know. And if it is a
Speaker 6: collection of people's pisses, that's a much bigger problem.
Speaker 1: And he doesn't want to talk about it.
Speaker 6: He just gets upset when I talked to him about it,
Speaker 6: like the sensive, because he knows it's gross.
Speaker 1: Does he still do it? Does he still collecting? What
Speaker 1: happened with the jar? Did he throw it away when
Speaker 1: he took it from you? What did he do with it?
Speaker 4: Oh?
Speaker 6: My god? So he washed it out and then he
Speaker 6: put it in the dishwasher. And now I don't know
Speaker 6: which one it is that's in the dishwashers. So I'm
Speaker 6: literally on my third cycle of running the dishes because
Speaker 6: I don't know which, Like we have multiple of those,
Speaker 6: like big ass Mason jars, I don't know which one
Speaker 6: it is.
Speaker 1: How many more piss jars until you leave him? What
Speaker 1: do you think.
Speaker 6: If one one? I see one more piss jar, I'm out.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 6: I do love him, but that's really solve.
Speaker 1: You love him up to one pissed jar, two piss jars?
Speaker 1: Is too much.
Speaker 6: Two pissed jars is going over the women.
Speaker 1: See that's why. That's why I mean, I I you know,
Speaker 1: I mean, that's one of the great pleasures of living
Speaker 1: alone is I actually have about ten pissed jars just
Speaker 1: in my freezer. I have the freedom to do that. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I think when you you can't really be keeping piss
Speaker 1: jars when you have roommates.
Speaker 6: Yeah, yeah, much less your girlfriend, Like, come on, what if.
Speaker 1: What if he told you that he just he what
Speaker 1: if I have a question, I'm curious about this before
Speaker 1: we go. So I don't like the way that he
Speaker 1: handled it because I think that uh, taking the pissed
Speaker 1: jar away and going we're never going to talk about this.
Speaker 1: I don't think that's the right way to handle it.
Speaker 1: I think you have to do what you have to do.
Speaker 1: Really in that situation. One of two things. You either
Speaker 1: have to be like, you know what, babe, you're right,
Speaker 1: it's gross, I'm sorry, won't do it again. I don't
Speaker 1: know what I was thinking, And then, you know, go
Speaker 1: leave it at that, or just defend it. I love
Speaker 1: pissing in a jar. Okay, I've been pissing in jars
Speaker 1: and keeping it on my nights stand for my entire life.
Speaker 1: It's part of who I am. And for this relationship
Speaker 1: to work, I need you to accept and love every
Speaker 1: single part of me, including the part of me that
Speaker 1: pisses in a jar and keeps it on my nightstand. Right,
Speaker 1: you got to do one of those two things. You
Speaker 1: gotta either apologize and not do it again, or you're
Speaker 1: gotta own that shit.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: So, to me, this man's cowardice lies not this. My
Speaker 1: fault with this man is not that he pissed in
Speaker 1: the jar, but it's it's it's the way he handled
Speaker 1: the situation that I'm not a fan of. I think
Speaker 1: he could have either defended it or took the L
Speaker 1: on it. Theo's are really those are your two options
Speaker 1: in life? Anything in between is that's really what you
Speaker 1: gotta do, to take an L or defend yourself.
Speaker 4: Yeah, those are the only two reasons why.
Speaker 1: Anything in between is like what are you? What are
Speaker 1: you doing? Yeah, So tell your boyfriends that he's gotta
Speaker 1: he's gotta do one of those two things.
Speaker 6: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Now, if he said to, if he if he confidently
Speaker 1: told you that that's part of who he is, is
Speaker 1: pissing in jars what would you say to that?
Speaker 6: Oh my god, I don't know. I probably wouldn't talk
Speaker 6: him for a week and contemplate like I couldn't live.
Speaker 4: With someone that charts.
Speaker 6: Apparently I do.
Speaker 1: Apparently I do, and that's true, and that's true. You do. Yeah,
Speaker 1: Is there anything else you want to say to the
Speaker 1: people of the computer before we go?
Speaker 6: No, I've been bringing your episode, so it's really nice
Speaker 6: to talk to you.
Speaker 1: It's been nice talking to you too. And look, I
Speaker 1: know it's tougher for women logistically, but try you know,
Speaker 1: if let's say, he does defend it to you, maybe
Speaker 1: you could piss it a jar to kind of get
Speaker 1: an idea of, you know, how he's thinking about it.
Speaker 4: You're right.
Speaker 1: Yeah, Also I'm also not right. You don't. You don't
Speaker 1: have to do that ship that's kind of anyways. All right,
Speaker 1: thanks for calling.
Speaker 6: Thank you.
Speaker 3: All.
Speaker 4: From Alex.
Speaker 1: Hello, Hey, what's your sir?
Speaker 4: My name is Alex, and I've got a funny story
Speaker 4: for you.
Speaker 1: Go ahead, go ahead.
Speaker 4: So, the last time I interacted with your channel, it
Speaker 4: was actually several years ago, and I was going through
Speaker 4: a rough time. I don't particularly remember what, but we
Speaker 4: just had this moment of silence, and it lasted what
Speaker 4: I would like to call an uncomfortable amount of time,
Speaker 4: just you sitting on stream, me sitting on the phone.
Speaker 4: There was one comment don't remember from Whome, but they said, man,
Speaker 4: seems like that guy needed that moment, and I just
Speaker 4: wanted to say thank you.
Speaker 1: Wow. Okay, so we've talked before, but technically not even
Speaker 1: talked before because there was silence. Yeah.
Speaker 4: Yeah, it was pretty much just several moments of silence,
Speaker 4: and then I think I actually ended up breaking it. It
Speaker 4: was going on a minute long and I was like,
Speaker 4: this was good, thank you, and he said thank you
Speaker 4: and then we hung up.
Speaker 1: Did you really feel like you needed that moment?
Speaker 4: You know, it's hard to say. I felt like it
Speaker 4: was pretty chill, pretty cool. Life is up though, we're winning.
Speaker 4: We're out here winning. In that time, I got a
Speaker 4: master's degree, working a good job, So you know, you
Speaker 4: could say that that was the inflection point where things
Speaker 4: started going up, not to.
Speaker 1: So you've called me to tell me that me saying
Speaker 1: literally nothing to you caused a lot of great things
Speaker 1: to happen in your life as a direct result.
Speaker 4: I think that's exactly what I called to tell you today.
Speaker 4: I think that if that moment of silence hadn't happened,
Speaker 4: I mean, who's to say, or my life would have gone.
Speaker 4: I probably would be doing all kinds of horrible things
Speaker 4: like cutting people off in traffic. Or I probably wouldn't.
Speaker 2: Have two dogs.
Speaker 4: I got two dogs now, they're pretty sick names Miso
Speaker 4: and Masabi.
Speaker 3: Hey Alex, yes, sir, about that time.
Speaker 1: It was good to talk to you again.
Speaker 4: The charger's all mine.
Speaker 7: Have a good stream, take care.
Speaker 3: Backwise.
Speaker 1: Hello, hi y, what's your name? My name is Mike, Mike. Uh,
Speaker 1: it says here. I'm just gonna read this verbatim. My
Speaker 1: name is Mike. I'm twenty nine, and my car is
Speaker 1: all caps full of wasps. Yeah, and it is one
Speaker 1: hundred percent my fault.
Speaker 4: How out?
Speaker 1: Okay, what happens?
Speaker 4: Okay? So it's it's actually my work car specifically that's
Speaker 4: full of wasps. And I should have known it was
Speaker 4: going to happen because I put them in there.
Speaker 1: Okay, So you, Mike, yes, uh, your car is full
Speaker 1: of wasp because you because you put the wasps in there.
Speaker 4: Well, yeah, they were in a bag.
Speaker 1: Okay, what why are you putting wasps in your car?
Speaker 4: Well? I killed bugs, and this one particular lady had
Speaker 4: a bunch of wasps in like a fake tree pot
Speaker 4: on her on her apartment balcony. She was like, I
Speaker 4: don't want my cats coming out here, and they're being
Speaker 4: like sprays and stuff all over. So as a as
Speaker 4: a solution oriented guy, I was like, you know what,
Speaker 4: I got this this garbage bag. I'll just stick the
Speaker 4: whole thing in this bag and tie it off and
Speaker 4: it'll be fine. It was not fun.
Speaker 1: Are the wasps dead?
Speaker 4: No, they are very much alive, and they've gotten out
Speaker 4: of the bag.
Speaker 1: I thought your job was to kill insects.
Speaker 4: I mean, yeah, in this case, I was. I was
Speaker 4: going to displace them first and then just toss them
Speaker 4: in the dumpster behind my building. But by the time
Speaker 4: I pulled up to my building, the wasps had come
Speaker 4: out of the bag in the sealed off back part
Speaker 4: of the car, and now it's full of very pissed
Speaker 4: off and hot wasp.
Speaker 1: See. The funny thing is you're gonna call somebody to
Speaker 1: get rid of the wasps, and then your phone's gonna
Speaker 1: start ringing because you're the because you're the guy that
Speaker 1: gets rid of the wasps.
Speaker 4: I am the guy that gets rid of the wasp. See,
Speaker 4: and I've got to be suit. I've got to be suit.
Speaker 4: But you're not going to believe this.
Speaker 1: No, I'm not telling me.
Speaker 4: It's in the car with the wasp.
Speaker 1: Why do you need to be Oh? Oh wait, I'm
Speaker 1: so dumb. I said, why do you need a be suit?
Speaker 1: Because I thought that you meant like a bee costume.
Speaker 1: I didn't realize you meant like like one of those
Speaker 1: bee keeping suit. I was like, why do you need
Speaker 1: to dress up like a bee to like gain the
Speaker 1: trust wasps? But I was like, hey man, this is
Speaker 1: the guy, is the best of the country. He has
Speaker 1: his methods. Okay, so what why didn't you kill the wasps?
Speaker 1: I thought you that's what you're supposed to do. They're
Speaker 1: gonna die anyway. This was this like a were you
Speaker 1: trying to be benevolent and let the wasps free?
Speaker 4: Truthfully, I just wanted to take the most immediate solution
Speaker 4: because like they were almost all in the nest in
Speaker 4: this plant pot on her balcony, and like she was like, oh,
Speaker 4: you could take some stuff out of there, Like there
Speaker 4: were a couple of rocks and a little makeshift trap
Speaker 4: that she made that didn't work, and so I was
Speaker 4: moving some stuff around. I moved one of the rocks.
Speaker 4: The tree like shifted forty five degrees and they just
Speaker 4: got super pissed. A bunch of anger wasps flying around
Speaker 4: on her balcony right around the thing I was trying
Speaker 4: to deal with. I was like, yeah, what done?
Speaker 1: There's something not like a gun gun, but like a
Speaker 1: spray gun or some ship that just kills Why do
Speaker 1: you carpet bomb? Why don't you carpet bomb your car
Speaker 1: with fucking wasp spray?
Speaker 4: The sprayer is in the car with the wasp.
Speaker 1: Oh, it's all in the car with the dan Yep,
Speaker 1: it's all in the car with the wasps, all of it.
Speaker 1: How many wasps are in your car?
Speaker 4: At least like two or three hundred, two.
Speaker 1: Or three hundred wasps.
Speaker 4: They aren't all out of the bag, but there there
Speaker 4: are more of them coming out as the day goes on.
Speaker 1: Are they Do you think there's more? Because they've repopulated
Speaker 1: and they've lai laid eggs.
Speaker 4: I don't know. I mean, they got larva and there
Speaker 4: unless they start cannibalizing the larva, are gonna run out
Speaker 4: of food? They might They should die off on their own.
Speaker 4: Probably not by the end of the weekend, when I'm
Speaker 4: gonna need to use the car again, So I'll have
Speaker 4: to come up with a creative solution in the meantime.
Speaker 1: Wait, how you How are you so sure they're going
Speaker 1: to die off on their own instead of resorting to
Speaker 1: cannibalism to stay.
Speaker 4: Alive, you know, not committed to the fact that they
Speaker 4: will die off, like most of them, Like a lot
Speaker 4: of them are in the bag. A lot of them
Speaker 4: in the bag. Like it's obviously not not air tight
Speaker 4: because they're getting out.
Speaker 1: Okay, I have a question. Yeah, are you avoiding calling
Speaker 1: another WASP exterminator because it would make you feel emasculated?
Speaker 4: No, not at all.
Speaker 1: Okay, so I do that.
Speaker 4: I can call my roommate.
Speaker 1: Does your roommate fight wasps?
Speaker 4: Yeah, but he has the key to his work vehicle,
Speaker 4: which is also no. Okay, it'd be funnier if if
Speaker 4: it was actually.
Speaker 1: Okay, So the his b suit is in somewhere in his.
Speaker 4: Car, but he's he's driving his girlfriend over to hang
Speaker 4: out with her sister, like three hours away.
Speaker 1: Oh okay, he's got a life. He has better things
Speaker 1: to do than this.
Speaker 7: He does.
Speaker 4: I'm watching a get go on a computer.
Speaker 1: Yeah, so you're just gonna so you're just gonna walk.
Speaker 1: He's can what you're gonna walk from now on? No
Speaker 1: more car?
Speaker 4: Oh, no personal vehicle. That's fine, but I'm.
Speaker 1: Not another car.
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, I don't. I don't use the company vehicle
Speaker 4: for everything.
Speaker 1: Is your Is your boss mad that you infested the
Speaker 1: vehicle with wasps?
Speaker 4: Oh? He's no idea.
Speaker 1: Are you gonna tell him?
Speaker 4: Why not?
Speaker 1: He'll probably be like, We'll get in there and fucking
Speaker 1: kill the wasp. This is what you do.
Speaker 4: That's that's probably what he would say.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's like if a fire truck was on fire,
Speaker 1: who do you call?
Speaker 4: I guess, I guess the firefighters.
Speaker 3: In the next county, not me.
Speaker 1: I can't help you at all.
Speaker 4: No, I mean you can't help Yeah, you can't help
Speaker 4: me at all.
Speaker 1: But I can provide you. I can provide you emotional
Speaker 1: I can provide you emotional support in your time of need.
Speaker 1: But I don't know how much that is helpful for you.
Speaker 4: Well, getual healing is more than enough. I'll uh, I'll
Speaker 4: take it.
Speaker 1: Is there anything else you want to say to the
Speaker 1: people of the computer before we go?
Speaker 4: There is something.
Speaker 1: Go ahead.
Speaker 4: Rats will suck up your house. Rats, rats, feral rats,
Speaker 4: They will suck up your hand.
Speaker 1: You know this from experience. You've had a rat. You've
Speaker 1: had first rats in your house, then wasping.
Speaker 4: I fuck up rats in other people's houses.
Speaker 1: No, rats, Oh you fuck up rats.
Speaker 4: I do have. I do have a bunch of wasps
Speaker 4: in my car. That was genuine.
Speaker 1: Would you rather fight a thousand rats or a thousand wasps?
Speaker 4: That's a big question, and.
Speaker 1: You get what you get, your stupid gun thing.
Speaker 4: It depends on the species have lost. If I'm being
Speaker 4: totally honest, like your car, Oh, the ones in my car? No? No, uh,
Speaker 4: A thousand wasps for sure? For sure.
Speaker 1: Okay, so they're not even that bad?
Speaker 4: Well, I mean less bad than a thousand rats.
Speaker 1: Okay, real quick. You also texted me saying that you've
Speaker 1: eaten frozen pizza every day for three years.
Speaker 4: Yeah, how are you alive? That is a really good question.
Speaker 4: They like the twelve inch of four in one box
Speaker 4: frozen pizzas. It's how it survives living underneath the poverty
Speaker 4: line for like three years.
Speaker 1: Are you still in any Are you still underneath the
Speaker 1: poverty line?
Speaker 4: No? No, I make good money, kiln bugs.
Speaker 1: Fuck yeah, it's good.
Speaker 4: Still pizzas through.
Speaker 1: What kind of pizza?
Speaker 5: Uh?
Speaker 4: They come in cheese and pepperoni, But I toss like
Speaker 4: cage in seasoning, maybe some some garlic powder on there.
Speaker 4: Get cans for like fucking pineapple, toss those on some
Speaker 4: of them. Uh, sauce that ship up, sir, Rocha fucking
Speaker 4: Chipotle Mayo. Uh got curious about Terry Aki one time.
Speaker 4: Thousand Islands on man, Dude, the potential for pizzas its infinite.
Speaker 1: Despite having wasps in your car, you have a good life.
Speaker 4: I like to think. So. To the show in Seattle
Speaker 4: is fucking slap.
Speaker 1: Oh shoot you were there? Oh hell yah, hell yah
Speaker 1: hell yeah.
Speaker 4: Well if I didn't stay aroun because I had to
Speaker 4: drive back up to Vancouver.
Speaker 1: But I'll see I'll see you next time. And don't
Speaker 1: bring any fucking wasps to the show.
Speaker 4: I can't promise you that I'll do my math later.
Speaker 1: If he brings wasps to the show, he's not getting in.
Speaker 1: That goes for anyone listening.
Speaker 6: MM.
Speaker 1: Tyler, Hello, Hello, what is your name?
Speaker 7: Tyler?
Speaker 1: How can I get you today? Tyler? What's going on?
Speaker 7: Ah? I thought it would be a funny story that
Speaker 7: uh my my cat d a used condom.
Speaker 1: Oh okay did did they get pregnant?
Speaker 4: I hope not.
Speaker 7: It's a boy, so I'm kind of praying not it is.
Speaker 7: It is kind of disturbing that a part of me
Speaker 7: and part of my girlfriend been inside of my cat.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's almost like you jizzed in your cat's mouth.
Speaker 1: It's not here's it's it's not. It's not exactly the
Speaker 1: same process, but they both ended in the same results. Unfortunately, Yeah,
Speaker 1: it is.
Speaker 7: It is mighty unfortunate.
Speaker 1: So that's pretty not I mean, that's not cool.
Speaker 7: I think he might have thought it was like like
Speaker 7: turkey skin or something. I have no idea. What have
Speaker 7: to have the impulse to gobble that ship that eat it?
Speaker 1: Well, the good news, I mean the good news is
Speaker 1: that your cat doesn't know that your com is your
Speaker 1: com like they don't like to our in our universe
Speaker 1: and our perceptions of things. Your cat eating your j's
Speaker 1: is gross, but I guess your cat.
Speaker 7: Well, but if you think about it because it was
Speaker 7: inside of it.
Speaker 1: Well, if I eat a hamburger, am I not eating
Speaker 1: cheese because it's inside of a hamburger? That doesn't make
Speaker 1: any sense.
Speaker 7: Well, I mean, and maybe the condom got twisted up,
Speaker 7: so the condoms stayed within the the just inside the condoms.
Speaker 1: Therefore, yes, but the jiz is inside of.
Speaker 7: Your cats, I guess. Yeah, I'm trying to justify it.
Speaker 1: Okay, what do you you know?
Speaker 7: What you well?
Speaker 2: Not?
Speaker 1: What do you mean? Hold on? Hold on, hold on?
Speaker 1: Just what do you mean by justify it? There's nothing
Speaker 1: to justify. It's not did you feed the condom to
Speaker 1: your cat?
Speaker 7: No? So okay, so what happened was, you know, I mean,
Speaker 7: and the old girlfriend you know, did did the dirty
Speaker 7: and then you know, I finished, and you know I
Speaker 7: was able to keep going, so I put it down
Speaker 7: on the ground for for a moment, like I had
Speaker 7: my pants on the ground, so I put it on
Speaker 7: top of my pants that was on the ground.
Speaker 1: Okay, you know you know you checked it. Sure, Okay,
Speaker 1: you checked it on the ground.
Speaker 7: Yeah, pretty much. And I didn't know. I had the
Speaker 7: door closed.
Speaker 2: And.
Speaker 7: Apparently he came in while we're going around to and
Speaker 7: then when I finished again.
Speaker 1: Okay, but there's not you again, you didn't feed the
Speaker 1: cat kind.
Speaker 7: Of this is no, no, no.
Speaker 1: You did not your cat's mouth or force feed.
Speaker 7: No, that is I would deserve to be hung if
Speaker 7: I ever done that. That is that is terrible. No,
Speaker 7: this was on peer accident and I was just stupid
Speaker 7: and did not close the door.
Speaker 1: Hey man, listen, don't you seem like this is haunting you?
Speaker 7: You know, at the end of the day, it is
Speaker 7: like a funny story to tell, but it is. I
Speaker 7: guess keep telling the story makes me feel a little
Speaker 7: bit better because it just gets funnier and it's just like,
Speaker 7: all right, I mean, it passed through. It was not
Speaker 7: supposed to supposedly, but you know.
Speaker 1: What, you know, actually hold on, you know what I
Speaker 1: I actually have an idea. I think I know how
Speaker 1: you can rectify the situation. Okay, you have to. You
Speaker 1: have to eat the ship covered condom. Don't ask me
Speaker 1: any further questions. Don't ask me any further questions as
Speaker 1: to how that rectifies the situation. But that's what I've
Speaker 1: decided that you have to do.
Speaker 7: Alaskan pipeline. But instead of put it in my ass,
Speaker 7: just eat it.
Speaker 1: I'm not going to ask you what an Alaskan pipeline is.
Speaker 1: Is there anything else you want to say? You to
Speaker 1: the people of the computer before we go.
Speaker 7: Make sure if if you have pets, close your doors
Speaker 7: when you're, when you're when you're doing the dirty, take
Speaker 7: care of all right. I love you, Lyle big fans.
Speaker 1: I might google it later, but I wasn't going to
Speaker 1: sit there and have him explain to me what that is.
Speaker 1: Taking your phone calls every night, every big get goestro
Speaker 1: on his eye. He's teaching you to how lip your life.
Speaker 1: Money's not ready, an expert,