WEBVTT - Self diagnosing episode 0:00:16.360 --> 0:00:20.160 Welcome to this episode of Emergency Intercom. 0:00:21.239 --> 0:00:24.280 Today, we are going to be teaching you the simplest 0:00:24.280 --> 0:00:26.200 ways to attend, simple. 0:00:25.840 --> 0:00:33.520 Hacks to make your life smoother, more pleasurable, and exciting, 0:00:34.640 --> 0:00:37.519 because all you need in life is some pleasure and 0:00:37.680 --> 0:00:41.040 excitement to keep you going. That's why me and you 0:00:41.120 --> 0:00:44.559 were so lucky we have each other, because I'm pleasure, 0:00:44.680 --> 0:00:45.520 he's excitement. 0:00:47.080 --> 0:00:47.440 Help me. 0:00:49.159 --> 0:00:51.080 Were you gonna say something? Before we started? You were like, 0:00:51.080 --> 0:00:53.040 what was it saying? But you didn't say anything. You 0:00:53.080 --> 0:00:54.440 were just like whispering to yourself. 0:00:54.440 --> 0:00:57.920 I just thought about like something I sent my sister 0:00:58.000 --> 0:00:59.360 this morning, and I was like, what the fuck was 0:00:59.360 --> 0:01:01.800 that video? I send that? But then I looked at 0:01:01.800 --> 0:01:04.280 the thumbnail and saw what it was. 0:01:04.440 --> 0:01:06.559 Yeah, you saw, you saw. 0:01:07.280 --> 0:01:10.520 Saw that's my text and drawl coming out I draw. 0:01:11.080 --> 0:01:15.679 I saw that's all I got. Yeah, my pillow. 0:01:16.480 --> 0:01:20.679 Now you say pillow, right, pillow? I need a new 0:01:20.680 --> 0:01:22.600 mattress so bad. But what they don't tell you is 0:01:22.600 --> 0:01:25.360 those things are so expensive. That's what they don't tell you. 0:01:25.400 --> 0:01:27.440 See how everybody's like, oh, they don't tell you about 0:01:27.480 --> 0:01:29.480 taxes when you know they don't tell you that the 0:01:29.480 --> 0:01:31.559 reason your parents let you sleep on the same dusty 0:01:31.600 --> 0:01:34.360 ass mattress for twenty years of your life. Is because 0:01:34.360 --> 0:01:37.360 they literally cost way too fucking much money. Like there's 0:01:37.360 --> 0:01:39.160 no way they need to be costing. 0:01:38.840 --> 0:01:39.440 That much money. 0:01:39.520 --> 0:01:42.399 Yeah, there's like a seven hundred percent markup on all mattresses. 0:01:42.480 --> 0:01:44.400 And if you go into a mattress store and you're 0:01:44.440 --> 0:01:47.000 like all I have is four hundred dollars and it's 0:01:47.000 --> 0:01:49.920 a twelve hundred dollars mattress, they will probably take that deal. 0:01:50.080 --> 0:01:52.760 Like you can talk people down on mattresses like crazy, 0:01:53.200 --> 0:01:56.920 but I understand like the price of a mattress sometimes 0:01:57.000 --> 0:02:00.000 because I'm like, you literally spend half of your life 0:02:00.120 --> 0:02:02.600 on that thing, like invest in a good fucking mattress, 0:02:02.680 --> 0:02:04.560 like make sure you get good sleep. 0:02:04.680 --> 0:02:06.800 I literally can't get myself to do it, Like I 0:02:06.840 --> 0:02:09.760 would genuinely rather buy a pair of shoes, like expensive 0:02:09.760 --> 0:02:12.000 shoes than buy a new mattress, because you can't take 0:02:12.000 --> 0:02:13.720 the mattress and show the mattress off. 0:02:13.600 --> 0:02:15.760 Because you're a girl and you're like buying clothes. 0:02:15.840 --> 0:02:16.600 Yeah, Like my. 0:02:16.680 --> 0:02:20.160 Girlly instinct is just like, erg, how am I gonna 0:02:20.200 --> 0:02:22.120 get my nails and my hair done if I get 0:02:22.120 --> 0:02:22.800 a mattress? 0:02:22.960 --> 0:02:29.560 Shiny dope, shiny squirrel squirrel friends, you are my squirrel friend? 0:02:29.800 --> 0:02:31.040 Like what? Well? 0:02:31.080 --> 0:02:32.960 Also, last night before I went to bed, I like 0:02:32.960 --> 0:02:35.640 couldn't fall asleep, So I was doing something that I 0:02:35.680 --> 0:02:38.360 never do, which was looking through my DM replies and 0:02:38.440 --> 0:02:40.640 I never do this, but it set me on a 0:02:40.680 --> 0:02:43.640 spiral of like people seeing what people reply to. And 0:02:43.720 --> 0:02:46.440 there are certain stories that like every DM I opened, 0:02:46.600 --> 0:02:51.720 somebody had replied to that same picture. But one DM 0:02:51.760 --> 0:02:54.760 set I opened wasn't a reply to anything. It was 0:02:54.840 --> 0:02:58.040 just somebody who's been sending me workout videos for the 0:02:58.080 --> 0:03:02.000 past oh day, for the past year, has been sending 0:03:02.040 --> 0:03:05.200 me like like easy ways to work out at home. 0:03:05.200 --> 0:03:09.040 They bodied you. So yeah, I was fully body, that's 0:03:09.080 --> 0:03:09.840 fucking crazy. 0:03:09.919 --> 0:03:12.799 Then okay, But then I thought, with my positive thinking, 0:03:12.840 --> 0:03:14.800 I was like, maybe this is somebody who just like 0:03:14.840 --> 0:03:18.040 you know how you like I'll send things to myself 0:03:18.080 --> 0:03:22.160 to my private account and like back and forth. So 0:03:22.200 --> 0:03:24.480 maybe that's just somebody doing that, Like they don't have 0:03:24.520 --> 0:03:26.160 a private account, so they're just like, this bitch is 0:03:26.160 --> 0:03:27.400 never going to see this shit. I'm just going to 0:03:27.440 --> 0:03:29.240 send what I want to save. But there is the 0:03:29.320 --> 0:03:30.760 same feature, so I don't know why she. 0:03:30.800 --> 0:03:33.760 Would Also maybe they were just saying like she needs 0:03:33.800 --> 0:03:34.679 to work out. 0:03:34.680 --> 0:03:37.560 Yeah, but like not in like a mean way, but 0:03:37.920 --> 0:03:40.320 like I want you to live forever way exactly, and 0:03:40.360 --> 0:03:42.360 you should work out and keep your body. 0:03:42.440 --> 0:03:44.760 Yeah, we can spend anything to be positive. Why don't 0:03:44.920 --> 0:03:48.280 more people do that's just like make everything happy? Like 0:03:49.280 --> 0:03:52.120 everyone that bullies me in like the comments, like they're 0:03:52.160 --> 0:03:55.560 probably like thirty percent of those people that are being 0:03:55.680 --> 0:04:00.080 serious and like actually making fun of me. But I 0:03:59.840 --> 0:04:03.240 have this like delusional thought pattern where I'm like, oh no, 0:04:03.320 --> 0:04:06.240 they're like also in on their joke, Like there there 0:04:06.240 --> 0:04:09.360 were joking together, like it's fine. But then for some reason, 0:04:09.360 --> 0:04:11.320 when people like do that to me in person where 0:04:11.360 --> 0:04:15.920 they're like mean to like be a friend like me, 0:04:16.000 --> 0:04:17.839 and I don't know how to explain it, it literally 0:04:17.839 --> 0:04:20.120 freaks me the fuck out, and I'm like, whoa, this 0:04:20.320 --> 0:04:21.120 is crazy. 0:04:21.320 --> 0:04:23.839 I think it's especially when it's like somebody who's not 0:04:23.880 --> 0:04:25.719 in our like close circle doing that. 0:04:25.720 --> 0:04:27.800 It's like why are you attacking me? Like why are 0:04:27.839 --> 0:04:29.600 you literally attacking me in my livelihood? 0:04:29.640 --> 0:04:31.839 Like you actually fucking hate me and you have some 0:04:31.920 --> 0:04:34.160 weird thing about me behind closed doors. 0:04:34.440 --> 0:04:37.520 But because that's like a funny girl. Yeah, I know that. 0:04:37.680 --> 0:04:41.480 We just have weird, funny things of people behind closed doors. 0:04:41.560 --> 0:04:43.480 Did I tell you the thing that happened to me 0:04:43.520 --> 0:04:46.640 in New York? It was like two trips ago. I 0:04:46.640 --> 0:04:49.240 think it was outside of something that we DJed when 0:04:49.240 --> 0:04:52.160 we were DJing shit and this girl came up and 0:04:52.200 --> 0:04:55.880 she was like, what's up, you stupid stinky bitch. 0:04:56.279 --> 0:04:58.240 Oh I think you did tell us this that. She 0:04:58.400 --> 0:04:59.880 was just like, it's. 0:04:59.839 --> 0:05:05.240 Like what and she was like, oh uh, I'm sorry. 0:05:05.279 --> 0:05:07.880 I just like that's what they do to you on 0:05:07.920 --> 0:05:10.120 the podcast. So I just was and then we just 0:05:10.200 --> 0:05:12.520 had like a normal conversation after that. But I was like, 0:05:12.720 --> 0:05:14.600 got so destabilized and you. 0:05:14.560 --> 0:05:15.839 Had to rewire her brain. 0:05:16.200 --> 0:05:20.279 It's literally it's because we like wire people's brains incorrectly 0:05:20.320 --> 0:05:23.200 with this fucking podcast. So people think it's normal to 0:05:23.240 --> 0:05:25.120 go up to other people and be like, hey, you 0:05:25.240 --> 0:05:28.440 fucking weird freak bitch, and that's not the way you 0:05:28.440 --> 0:05:31.400 should be talking to Like, that's just simply. 0:05:31.200 --> 0:05:35.159 That's how we talk to each other, and that's okay. Actually, 0:05:35.200 --> 0:05:37.520 you know what I've been thinking about is like, literally, 0:05:37.600 --> 0:05:43.920 how you are the most lovely, like kind person I've 0:05:43.920 --> 0:05:45.680 ever met. You're just so genuine. 0:05:45.839 --> 0:05:48.080 You have not been thinking about that. There's no way 0:05:48.120 --> 0:05:48.880 you've been sitting there. 0:05:48.920 --> 0:05:51.559 I just like I was just deep into thought thinking 0:05:51.600 --> 0:05:52.280 about that, Like. 0:05:52.360 --> 0:05:54.640 Just now, are you trying to like tell me that 0:05:54.680 --> 0:05:56.760 you were sitting on your iPhone in your room doing that? 0:05:57.040 --> 0:06:00.920 Drew does Drew in the way he uses his phone 0:06:00.960 --> 0:06:02.680 actually freaks me out. And what he buys on the 0:06:02.720 --> 0:06:04.520 internet freaks me out. We are living in an age 0:06:04.640 --> 0:06:07.360 where you could buy anything you could ever wish on 0:06:07.400 --> 0:06:10.920 your iPhone, and Drew sits on there and buys like 0:06:11.279 --> 0:06:13.839 fucking weird germs that live in the sea that like 0:06:14.080 --> 0:06:17.480 turn blue when you shake them, and fucking candy. 0:06:17.520 --> 0:06:19.960 It's not even gonna show because it's daytime, but. 0:06:19.920 --> 0:06:21.240 I'm gonna show them. 0:06:21.640 --> 0:06:24.239 Like in daytime, it's literally just a glass of water. 0:06:24.480 --> 0:06:28.880 Okay, So these are fuck I literally forgot the name. 0:06:29.120 --> 0:06:35.880 They're not Dietamacious, they're d fuck what are they called? Dinoflagellites? 0:06:36.600 --> 0:06:39.960 And of course they're the ship. They're basically like they 0:06:40.000 --> 0:06:42.839 go up onto the shore every once in a while, 0:06:43.040 --> 0:06:46.080 and like it's the blue glow that you see like 0:06:46.160 --> 0:06:49.360 in the wave break or you see like people wading 0:06:49.400 --> 0:06:52.360 through the water, and they react to water movement, so 0:06:52.400 --> 0:06:56.280 that's why they glow. It's like an evolutionary trait like 0:06:56.400 --> 0:06:58.400 either like I don't know what it's for, if it's 0:06:58.440 --> 0:07:00.960 to like scare predators away, or if it's to like 0:07:01.600 --> 0:07:04.920 reproduce and find babies or find people to have sex with. 0:07:06.160 --> 0:07:09.600 But they fucking put them in a jar and you 0:07:09.640 --> 0:07:12.520 can like have them just sitting on your fucking countertop 0:07:12.560 --> 0:07:14.160 and they just sit in the sun because they're on 0:07:14.200 --> 0:07:17.680 a day cycle. They absorbed the sunlight and then after 0:07:17.720 --> 0:07:19.920 a week of just like chilling in the sun, they'll 0:07:20.040 --> 0:07:22.480 like kind of like glow if you shake the thing. 0:07:23.040 --> 0:07:24.800 And also you can like keep them for as long 0:07:24.840 --> 0:07:26.680 as possible because you just put the food and the 0:07:26.760 --> 0:07:29.080 nutrients in there and they just like chill. 0:07:29.440 --> 0:07:32.080 So he has invisible pets, that's what he's well, no, 0:07:32.120 --> 0:07:33.800 you can kind of visible. 0:07:33.560 --> 0:07:35.720 Pets kind of just looks like backwash. 0:07:35.880 --> 0:07:39.200 Yeah, like it looks like your toothbrush cup. 0:07:39.400 --> 0:07:42.760 Yeah. So these are the loves. These are the loves 0:07:42.800 --> 0:07:47.600 of my life. And I replaced my praying mantis. Go gi, 0:07:48.720 --> 0:07:49.440 rest in peace. 0:07:51.320 --> 0:07:52.840 Who don't know about your dead bug. 0:07:53.360 --> 0:07:55.760 There's a lot of people that that you killed. I know, 0:07:55.960 --> 0:07:59.560 I come to the conclusion that she got jealous. That's 0:07:59.600 --> 0:08:00.880 really actually. 0:08:00.520 --> 0:08:01.480 Here's my theory. 0:08:01.600 --> 0:08:04.960 My hypothesis is Drew accidentally killed that bug because you 0:08:04.960 --> 0:08:08.760 took it out in the most toxic environment ever. You 0:08:08.760 --> 0:08:11.240 took it out in a fucking California parking lot and 0:08:11.280 --> 0:08:13.360 it flew around summer. 0:08:15.280 --> 0:08:19.200 Yeah, oh, I thought that was yours got lost because 0:08:19.200 --> 0:08:23.160 they were like, that's not gonna fly for another one live. 0:08:23.520 --> 0:08:24.920 Like longer than yours are. 0:08:24.800 --> 0:08:26.320 Now, Yeah, a lot longer. 0:08:26.520 --> 0:08:29.400 Yeah, you're just a bad father, and you should take 0:08:29.440 --> 0:08:32.000 that into account when you think of you're producing with somebody, 0:08:32.000 --> 0:08:33.560 because you definitely should not have kids. 0:08:33.640 --> 0:08:39.600 Oh damn no, I think genuinely what happened was they 0:08:39.720 --> 0:08:43.560 sold me like a dying one, yeah, like an older one, 0:08:43.600 --> 0:08:45.320 and they just were like trying to get rid of 0:08:45.360 --> 0:08:47.240 it because I did get it on sale one and 0:08:47.280 --> 0:08:49.000 it was like the end of the day and two 0:08:49.480 --> 0:08:52.920 and three. I think it was like way more like 0:08:53.040 --> 0:08:56.880 developed than they even they knew, or they let on, Yeah, 0:08:57.120 --> 0:08:57.760 let me on to. 0:08:57.760 --> 0:09:01.400 Know, because like a immediately shed when it got. 0:09:01.240 --> 0:09:04.400 In the house too, or Kai is sniffing his armpits 0:09:04.480 --> 0:09:05.680 like crazy that's you know. 0:09:05.720 --> 0:09:07.760 I usually I'll make fun of him, but I can 0:09:07.800 --> 0:09:10.240 condone that because i'd rather, you know, if you stink 0:09:10.320 --> 0:09:11.640 like doo dooo dog shit. 0:09:12.760 --> 0:09:14.920 New and fix it. So I'm just kind of, well, 0:09:14.960 --> 0:09:19.600 what's the Yeah, we'll believe it because. 0:09:20.440 --> 0:09:23.840 Yeah, okay, it's. 0:09:25.520 --> 0:09:28.280 Oh no you. 0:09:29.080 --> 0:09:32.959 Oh you, but I'm using a different string. 0:09:33.120 --> 0:09:34.480 Is it aluminum free? 0:09:34.760 --> 0:09:35.520 It's aluminum. 0:09:35.520 --> 0:09:38.000 We need to put aluminum back in the ideodorant. I 0:09:38.080 --> 0:09:40.200 knew I smelled something when you walked in the room. 0:09:40.240 --> 0:09:42.200 I didn't know what it was, but now I know. 0:09:42.480 --> 0:09:45.040 I wasn't gonna say did it smell good? No? 0:09:45.280 --> 0:09:48.079 Why would it like it didn't smell it was getting. 0:09:48.480 --> 0:09:51.960 They get compliments ki to me, they get silence. 0:09:52.200 --> 0:09:56.000 To me, it smelled good, likely like your pheromones or not. 0:09:56.120 --> 0:09:59.160 No, yeah, that's coming from a sexual place and you 0:09:59.200 --> 0:10:00.280 should write that down. 0:10:01.080 --> 0:10:06.200 Okay, so we all know how I can't read like 0:10:06.280 --> 0:10:09.360 that is like a real thing. I don't know how 0:10:09.360 --> 0:10:12.160 to read. Like you should see me do the ad read, 0:10:12.200 --> 0:10:16.600 which like maybe we'll add like a clip of me 0:10:17.360 --> 0:10:20.240 like doing an ad read where I like try to 0:10:20.280 --> 0:10:22.400 get the same thing thirty six times a row. But 0:10:22.440 --> 0:10:25.679 it just like I freaked the funk out because I literally. 0:10:25.520 --> 0:10:28.640 Literally everyone needs to evacuate the room. Yeah, mine, Drew 0:10:28.720 --> 0:10:30.200 has to read something out loud. 0:10:30.160 --> 0:10:34.560 My eyes Like what happens is my eyes read the 0:10:34.600 --> 0:10:38.880 words way too quickly and my mouth can't light. 0:10:39.160 --> 0:10:41.320 So you're just too smart to be able to see. 0:10:41.080 --> 0:10:43.960 Exactly exactly, No, I just can't focus on the one 0:10:44.000 --> 0:10:47.680 thing at hand. Well, I found this new method of 0:10:47.720 --> 0:10:53.560 reading called bionic reading, and it highlights the first half 0:10:53.720 --> 0:10:54.600 of the word. 0:10:54.480 --> 0:10:56.640 Because I think that was the thing that Bella Thorne 0:10:56.679 --> 0:10:58.800 literally talked about on Disney And I'm not even kidding. 0:10:58.880 --> 0:11:01.600 It highlights the first half of the word, or bolds 0:11:01.640 --> 0:11:04.000 the first three letters. And I swear to god, it 0:11:04.040 --> 0:11:09.119 was like I put on like those seeing color glasses, 0:11:09.280 --> 0:11:11.000 like for the first time that logan Paul had like 0:11:11.000 --> 0:11:13.439 a meltdown with like people who don't see color. 0:11:13.840 --> 0:11:17.320 Oh wait, he pretended like he couldn't see right, I 0:11:17.360 --> 0:11:20.440 don't think I think he actually might have been color blind. 0:11:20.559 --> 0:11:22.200 Oh what did he get it fixed? 0:11:22.240 --> 0:11:26.520 Because now he maybe he just exists as a color 0:11:26.559 --> 0:11:31.559 blind person because you can live when there's like different varyings. 0:11:31.679 --> 0:11:36.360 I mean, but I read this one morning laying in 0:11:36.400 --> 0:11:39.240 my bed, and I read it out loud to myself 0:11:39.280 --> 0:11:41.199 because I was like, there's no way this works. And 0:11:41.240 --> 0:11:43.800 it genuinely like made me tear up because I was like, 0:11:43.800 --> 0:11:46.480 what the fuck? I can like actually read this, like 0:11:46.640 --> 0:11:48.439 all the way through. 0:11:49.559 --> 0:11:52.320 Reading that out loud, even alone, because reading out loud 0:11:52.360 --> 0:11:53.640 alone is really embarrassing. 0:11:53.679 --> 0:11:55.240 Well, I just needed to see if it worked, because 0:11:55.240 --> 0:11:57.880 that's my problem. I can read inside my head, but 0:11:57.920 --> 0:12:00.520 I cannot read or it's hard for me to come imprehend. 0:12:00.760 --> 0:12:03.160 But when I have to speak out loud when I'm 0:12:03.160 --> 0:12:06.960 reading something, everything goes wrong. Everything goes wrong. 0:12:07.880 --> 0:12:09.199 But yeah, you give us an example. 0:12:09.280 --> 0:12:09.640 Read it. 0:12:10.840 --> 0:12:13.760 But if I fuck up like that, you. 0:12:13.760 --> 0:12:14.839 Do really really good. 0:12:15.040 --> 0:12:16.960 And then what if you do so good that somebody 0:12:17.040 --> 0:12:18.800 hits us up and they're like, we need you to 0:12:18.840 --> 0:12:21.240 be the next host of the Grand Spelling Bee, And 0:12:21.280 --> 0:12:23.440 then you're just like wow in the grammar world. 0:12:23.559 --> 0:12:26.800 Okay, I'll try the without it, and then i'll do 0:12:26.840 --> 0:12:30.400 it with. Yeah, bionic reading is a new method facilitating 0:12:30.440 --> 0:12:33.480 the reading process. Okay, I'm doing the one with because 0:12:33.520 --> 0:12:37.439 I know it already. It's it's it's a failed experiment 0:12:37.440 --> 0:12:39.319 because I already did it, Like I already know what's 0:12:39.360 --> 0:12:41.560 coming next, like I know how it's gonna go, like 0:12:41.640 --> 0:12:42.040 you know the. 0:12:42.000 --> 0:12:44.200 Words, but sometimes I can mess you up even more 0:12:44.240 --> 0:12:45.800 because then you think you know the words, because that 0:12:45.840 --> 0:12:48.360 fucks me up when I'm like reading something out loud 0:12:48.440 --> 0:12:50.680 or like candied, like it's like okay, like here's a script, 0:12:50.679 --> 0:12:53.280 and then I say it right the first time or 0:12:53.280 --> 0:12:55.360 what I think is right, and someone's like, oh, well, 0:12:55.400 --> 0:12:57.360 you added a word, and it's because I was like 0:12:57.440 --> 0:12:58.000 I already know. 0:12:58.040 --> 0:13:00.360 This, and then I always add like a filler word. 0:13:00.480 --> 0:13:05.640 M All right, let's try let's tryl be scared. Okay, 0:13:05.679 --> 0:13:07.080 I'm gonna really try hard. 0:13:07.280 --> 0:13:10.840 Now you literally know how Bella felt on those fucking Disneys. No, 0:13:11.120 --> 0:13:13.640 it's true they paid her for those extra apps because like, 0:13:13.880 --> 0:13:14.520 why were they. 0:13:14.440 --> 0:13:15.120 Doing that to her? 0:13:15.640 --> 0:13:18.080 They like ruined her, they like slandered her. 0:13:18.440 --> 0:13:20.600 Though they like made her the poster child when she 0:13:20.720 --> 0:13:22.839 was just supposed to be like an actress in a show, 0:13:23.040 --> 0:13:25.959 like she was the poster child for dyslexia. 0:13:26.000 --> 0:13:27.080 She had to have been paid. 0:13:26.840 --> 0:13:30.280 For that, though, I probably. I mean, those Disney contracts 0:13:30.280 --> 0:13:33.600 are fucking horrifying. I know, like they're really really scary. 0:13:34.679 --> 0:13:37.839 But okay, reading is a new method facilitating the reading 0:13:37.840 --> 0:13:41.800 process by guiding eyes through text with artificial fixation points. 0:13:41.880 --> 0:13:44.120 As a result, the reader is only focusing on a 0:13:44.200 --> 0:13:49.120 highlighted initial letter and lets the brain center complete the word. 0:13:50.280 --> 0:13:55.360 It's pretty good, like y'all, Yes, someone made a Google 0:13:55.480 --> 0:13:59.760 Chrome extension, but like y'all have seen weird. 0:14:00.120 --> 0:14:02.920 Yeah, ionic reading is a new method facilitating the reading. 0:14:03.160 --> 0:14:04.040 Well, I can just read. 0:14:05.360 --> 0:14:10.600 Yeah. I think it was actually very impressive that we 0:14:10.679 --> 0:14:12.080 need to get the add coffees. 0:14:12.400 --> 0:14:15.680 I know you don't have literally a meltdown and you're like, 0:14:15.840 --> 0:14:17.720 I'm gonna do that. 0:14:17.720 --> 0:14:21.960 That was really sexy seeing you read the sentence thank you. Yeah. 0:14:22.720 --> 0:14:25.080 I looked at the logan Paul thing and it said 0:14:25.840 --> 0:14:29.480 that he did kind of fake it. It was a 0:14:29.560 --> 0:14:31.600 quote it says, I wanted to create an amazing story, 0:14:31.600 --> 0:14:35.400 an amazing piece of content that shows what it meant 0:14:35.480 --> 0:14:38.479 to be color blind. Just like any storyteller, I exaggerated 0:14:38.560 --> 0:14:42.120 my reactions. I did not lie. What I did was embellish. 0:14:42.880 --> 0:14:47.480 That's basically yeah, that's just me when I lie. 0:14:47.720 --> 0:14:48.440 That's literally me. 0:14:48.520 --> 0:14:51.200 Anytime I read a joke off of TikTok to somebody, 0:14:51.200 --> 0:14:54.040 I always add embellishments. To it because I'm like embarrass 0:14:54.080 --> 0:14:55.520 because I'm like, what if they don't think this is funny? 0:14:55.520 --> 0:14:57.320 And I basically changed the joke when I'm reading it out, 0:14:57.320 --> 0:14:59.040 and then the person usually laughs with the card and. 0:14:58.960 --> 0:15:01.160 I'm like, yeah, well I actually made that joke, so 0:15:01.520 --> 0:15:03.400 now do you ever do that? 0:15:03.480 --> 0:15:05.840 I get really embarrassed to read things I find funny 0:15:05.840 --> 0:15:08.760 on my iPhone, so I just fake it and I'm like, oh, 0:15:08.960 --> 0:15:11.560 this wasn't as funny as like I thought it was, 0:15:11.880 --> 0:15:15.920 so then I like I add I added little to it. 0:15:17.240 --> 0:15:19.680 I just read whatever comes on my iPhone out loud 0:15:19.680 --> 0:15:22.720 wherever I am at any moment, Like if something funny 0:15:22.720 --> 0:15:25.560 like a funny tweet pops up like Oryan's the same way, 0:15:25.640 --> 0:15:27.960 We'll just like see it and read it out loud 0:15:28.080 --> 0:15:30.000 and just say it and make everybody laugh and then 0:15:30.160 --> 0:15:33.280 keep scrolling until the next one comes up, like it's 0:15:33.320 --> 0:15:34.080 crazy I. 0:15:34.040 --> 0:15:35.320 Read deleted TikTok oh. 0:15:35.360 --> 0:15:38.400 But also that the dyslexic thing came up because last 0:15:38.480 --> 0:15:40.560 night I saw a YouTube video that was like a 0:15:40.600 --> 0:15:43.240 dyslexia test, and he was like, obviously this isn't the 0:15:43.240 --> 0:15:45.600 way to like know, you should go to a professional, 0:15:45.600 --> 0:15:47.840 but this is the test that a lot of professionals use, 0:15:48.240 --> 0:15:50.800 and I think it was like some number like ninety 0:15:50.800 --> 0:15:54.920 four percent of people who like go in to take 0:15:54.960 --> 0:15:57.200 it usually come out the other end and are like, oh, yeah, 0:15:57.240 --> 0:15:59.320 I actually do have like a minor form of dyslexia, 0:16:00.360 --> 0:16:03.520 because I think it's like way more common than people realize. 0:16:03.680 --> 0:16:05.680 But then as I was watching it, I was like, man, 0:16:05.760 --> 0:16:07.880 it's crazy how there's so much gray area to everything, 0:16:08.120 --> 0:16:10.480 because he was like, yeah, you know, and my dad 0:16:10.560 --> 0:16:12.800 still has a hard time spelling things, so I definitely 0:16:12.800 --> 0:16:14.640 think like, and he hasn't been tested, but I think 0:16:14.640 --> 0:16:16.120 I got it from him. And I was like, yeah, 0:16:16.120 --> 0:16:18.200 my dad too. But my dad literally. 0:16:17.800 --> 0:16:21.040 Taught himself English, so I don't think he counts like 0:16:21.280 --> 0:16:22.040 my dad the way. 0:16:22.360 --> 0:16:24.400 If someone's all the way my dad text, it would 0:16:24.440 --> 0:16:24.960 be crazy. 0:16:25.200 --> 0:16:26.960 But I understand it. But it's literally because. 0:16:26.800 --> 0:16:28.440 It's ever seen. 0:16:28.440 --> 0:16:31.240 It's like it's saying. Because also, if you hear my 0:16:31.440 --> 0:16:34.160 dad talk like, he does not sound like that. 0:16:34.360 --> 0:16:36.480 I also think it's part of laziness. Like the way 0:16:36.520 --> 0:16:38.640 my dad text, it's fully like laziness. 0:16:38.680 --> 0:16:42.040 It's just giving Dad core. Like Dad's text messages are 0:16:42.120 --> 0:16:47.040 like literally the worst, like most offensive, like soulless, emotionless 0:16:47.040 --> 0:16:48.720 thing you can ever receive on your life. And I 0:16:48.760 --> 0:16:49.440 think that's it. 0:16:49.360 --> 0:16:51.840 Always feels like he's angry at me. When we're texting. 0:16:52.120 --> 0:16:54.800 It's like, hey, my dad literally says kay, and like 0:16:54.880 --> 0:16:56.840 he doesn't realize that that's like actually. 0:16:56.760 --> 0:17:00.400 Yeah, my dad says okay. He goes, how are you? Yeah? 0:17:00.400 --> 0:17:03.160 And I said good and you, And then I said 0:17:03.200 --> 0:17:04.760 I need that hoodie because he sent me a picture 0:17:04.760 --> 0:17:06.360 of this girl wearing a hoodie said if you heard 0:17:06.359 --> 0:17:08.440 anything bad about me, believe all that shit and leave 0:17:08.480 --> 0:17:09.919 me the fuck alone. And my dad's all that and 0:17:09.920 --> 0:17:12.160 thought of to me. I was like, I need that hoodie. 0:17:12.320 --> 0:17:15.600 He's like, he goes, goo, are you in New York? 0:17:15.800 --> 0:17:27.520 I just made the tuna salad e phil oof really good? What? 0:17:28.280 --> 0:17:32.280 I think he has the Spanish keyboard keyboard on two 0:17:33.119 --> 0:17:35.919 so and I think it's he does have autocorrect on 0:17:36.080 --> 0:17:38.840 for like the or the predicted words on for Spanish. 0:17:39.080 --> 0:17:41.600 So I'm sure as he's typing, it always gives a 0:17:41.600 --> 0:17:44.440 replacement and he's like strus fighting his keyboard to type 0:17:44.480 --> 0:17:47.760 in English. Yes, I worked in home, we are good. 0:17:48.760 --> 0:17:52.920 Yeah. He I think it is definitely out of laziness 0:17:52.960 --> 0:17:55.399 because if you heard my dad talk read but also 0:17:55.480 --> 0:17:57.320 I'm like delusional and I don't think my dad has 0:17:57.320 --> 0:17:58.960 an accent, but everybody who meets him is like that 0:17:59.000 --> 0:18:00.359 man fully has an act by. 0:18:00.240 --> 0:18:04.640 An accent, but it's like it's it's like, yeah, it's 0:18:04.680 --> 0:18:05.919 not like the craziest thing. 0:18:06.040 --> 0:18:07.639 But yeah, if you heard him talk, you wouldn't think 0:18:07.680 --> 0:18:09.760 these were his text messages. I think he just doesn't 0:18:09.800 --> 0:18:13.360 want to They don't dn it to you think it's finished. 0:18:13.480 --> 0:18:16.000 That's one of his texts. I'm not even kidding. 0:18:16.720 --> 0:18:20.080 Hi, hi note ihow remember that you had payment on it. 0:18:20.160 --> 0:18:23.400 They don't dn it to you Like that's I'm saying, 0:18:23.440 --> 0:18:25.919 they don't send it to you until it's finished. And 0:18:25.920 --> 0:18:28.560 he said, they don't dne it to you until it's finished. 0:18:29.920 --> 0:18:33.520 Yeah, let me check a text for my dad. Okay, 0:18:34.000 --> 0:18:36.320 you're no. 0:18:36.320 --> 0:18:36.399 No. 0:18:36.600 --> 0:18:38.879 He sent me a picture of a tesla and he said, 0:18:39.480 --> 0:18:42.800 isn't this so slay Elon Musk is literally mother. 0:18:43.840 --> 0:18:45.200 He did not say that, bitch. 0:18:47.640 --> 0:18:49.040 All right, let's see what my dad. 0:18:49.040 --> 0:18:51.280 I was like, Well, your dad is like so interconnected 0:18:51.280 --> 0:18:53.199 into your life and wanting to understand what you do 0:18:53.240 --> 0:18:56.280 that he's like he's learning. He's learning the language of 0:18:56.280 --> 0:18:59.080