1 00:00:01,960 --> 00:00:05,320 Speaker 1: Wind Down with Janet Kramer and I'm Heart Radio Podcast. 2 00:00:06,920 --> 00:00:09,959 Speaker 2: All right, we are ready to wind down today. We've 3 00:00:09,960 --> 00:00:17,800 Speaker 2: got topics. Can I just say though a few things? Uh, 4 00:00:18,040 --> 00:00:20,040 Speaker 2: this is I don't know why I'm laughing. It's actually 5 00:00:20,079 --> 00:00:22,759 Speaker 2: not funny because I was crying this morning. But I 6 00:00:22,840 --> 00:00:27,280 Speaker 2: can't we cope with things normal. Yeah, yeah, shoot, that 7 00:00:27,400 --> 00:00:31,600 Speaker 2: happened the other day too. Oh. I can't even remember 8 00:00:31,640 --> 00:00:33,760 Speaker 2: the conversation, but I was, which is I know this 9 00:00:33,800 --> 00:00:36,240 Speaker 2: sucks when I say that, because You're like, okay, cool 10 00:00:36,960 --> 00:00:40,400 Speaker 2: but cool, thanks for lighting us And I should have 11 00:00:40,479 --> 00:00:43,760 Speaker 2: been communicating better. But I just started laughing because it's 12 00:00:43,760 --> 00:00:47,000 Speaker 2: just my own uncomfortable sometimes I don't I haven't done 13 00:00:47,040 --> 00:00:48,760 Speaker 2: that a long time. And I was like wow, But 14 00:00:48,800 --> 00:00:54,520 Speaker 2: then I couldn't stop laughing. Sorryratuation a little worse. No, 15 00:00:54,600 --> 00:00:59,320 Speaker 2: But this morning, so Jace had a little surgery on 16 00:00:59,400 --> 00:01:04,200 Speaker 2: his sebation nevis removal, and I thought, for a second, 17 00:01:04,240 --> 00:01:07,800 Speaker 2: I'm like, how do moms do this all the time? Like, 18 00:01:07,880 --> 00:01:10,000 Speaker 2: what do you mean? He was in a gown and 19 00:01:10,040 --> 00:01:13,160 Speaker 2: on his bed and he's away, you know, And I'm like, 20 00:01:13,959 --> 00:01:16,280 Speaker 2: mom's parents have to do this all the time. Yeah, 21 00:01:16,400 --> 00:01:19,240 Speaker 2: I was like and then nurse. Like, so when we 22 00:01:19,280 --> 00:01:21,000 Speaker 2: take him away and I just start crying, She's like, 23 00:01:21,000 --> 00:01:22,800 Speaker 2: we're gonna need you to be happy. And I'm like 24 00:01:22,880 --> 00:01:24,760 Speaker 2: and she's like looking right up and she's like, you're 25 00:01:24,760 --> 00:01:27,360 Speaker 2: an actress, do your thing. Yeah, and she's just like, 26 00:01:27,400 --> 00:01:29,119 Speaker 2: you know, I know, I'm like a nurse but also 27 00:01:29,200 --> 00:01:31,080 Speaker 2: like mom too, So it's it's hard for me to 28 00:01:31,080 --> 00:01:32,880 Speaker 2: say this as well. I get it, but like we 29 00:01:32,920 --> 00:01:34,759 Speaker 2: need them to not be scared. But then I was thinking, 30 00:01:34,840 --> 00:01:37,360 Speaker 2: I'm like, okay, Janna, lock it up, because there's moms 31 00:01:37,360 --> 00:01:39,880 Speaker 2: that do this and parents all the time. I cannot 32 00:01:39,920 --> 00:01:42,080 Speaker 2: imagine being in hospital and like seeing like him in 33 00:01:42,080 --> 00:01:44,600 Speaker 2: the little gown and the little ivy and I'm just like, 34 00:01:44,800 --> 00:01:47,600 Speaker 2: if you guys ever walked to Saint Jude, I'm assuming, yeah, yeah, 35 00:01:47,840 --> 00:01:50,840 Speaker 2: it's just like heartbreaking. Yeah, it's really like I just 36 00:01:50,920 --> 00:01:56,520 Speaker 2: can't imagine. Mm hmm, just blessed, yes. And those moms 37 00:01:56,520 --> 00:02:00,120 Speaker 2: are my heroes, even NICKI moms. I don't know, like, oh, 38 00:02:00,160 --> 00:02:02,320 Speaker 2: I know, I just don't know how nick you not 39 00:02:02,400 --> 00:02:05,800 Speaker 2: even but like I have a neighbor next door to 40 00:02:05,800 --> 00:02:07,440 Speaker 2: me who's a nick You was a nick you mom, 41 00:02:07,480 --> 00:02:09,919 Speaker 2: and I am just like I just don't know how 42 00:02:10,080 --> 00:02:12,440 Speaker 2: like it's a different level of like courage and bravery 43 00:02:12,480 --> 00:02:15,520 Speaker 2: to me. Yeah, and just trust baby there. Yeah, just 44 00:02:15,560 --> 00:02:17,120 Speaker 2: having to do any of that is just not fair 45 00:02:17,160 --> 00:02:20,960 Speaker 2: as a mom. So Catherine has a big milestone coming 46 00:02:21,040 --> 00:02:25,280 Speaker 2: up this well it had already passed once the Sair's, 47 00:02:25,320 --> 00:02:28,560 Speaker 2: but it's coming up this Friday. Oh yeah, tell me 48 00:02:29,160 --> 00:02:32,520 Speaker 2: what's your milestone. Two years ago, she spent her anniversary 49 00:02:32,520 --> 00:02:35,919 Speaker 2: with me, actually when she was still technically married. Actually, 50 00:02:35,960 --> 00:02:38,880 Speaker 2: your hand if you've spent one of your anniversaries with Jenna, Well. 51 00:02:38,840 --> 00:02:40,800 Speaker 1: Nick brought it up and said that it was actually 52 00:02:40,840 --> 00:02:44,800 Speaker 1: the last two Oh oh lash, well yeah, because you 53 00:02:44,800 --> 00:02:47,840 Speaker 1: were like separated. Well, no, we were still together our 54 00:02:47,919 --> 00:02:50,040 Speaker 1: last one. The two before that, I had spent it 55 00:02:50,040 --> 00:02:51,600 Speaker 1: with you for some reason. I don't remember the one 56 00:02:51,600 --> 00:02:52,080 Speaker 1: before that. 57 00:02:52,160 --> 00:02:55,160 Speaker 2: The one before was because I just got divorced. 58 00:02:54,919 --> 00:02:57,200 Speaker 1: Right, But then there was another time. But anyway, last 59 00:02:57,280 --> 00:02:58,960 Speaker 1: year too, you did, I think the year before that? 60 00:02:59,200 --> 00:03:00,200 Speaker 2: Oh for that one? 61 00:03:00,240 --> 00:03:02,760 Speaker 1: Okay, So anyway, yeah, I got to spen my anniversary ye, 62 00:03:02,919 --> 00:03:05,519 Speaker 1: filing foranas to force two years ago. 63 00:03:05,800 --> 00:03:09,320 Speaker 2: Well, anyway, anniversary, no anniversaries, that feels yeah. 64 00:03:09,360 --> 00:03:11,720 Speaker 1: So this year is our sixteenth anniversary. 65 00:03:12,200 --> 00:03:14,280 Speaker 2: That's crazy nexteen years. 66 00:03:14,400 --> 00:03:17,639 Speaker 1: Yeah, because we're not starting over. We're not starting Oh wow. 67 00:03:18,080 --> 00:03:21,240 Speaker 2: You deserved every sixteen of those years. You don't want 68 00:03:21,240 --> 00:03:22,440 Speaker 2: to go back to seven. We don't want to go 69 00:03:22,480 --> 00:03:23,200 Speaker 2: back to San Diego. 70 00:03:23,280 --> 00:03:25,880 Speaker 1: Oh god, no, no, no, we had to do seven 71 00:03:25,919 --> 00:03:26,600 Speaker 1: all over again. 72 00:03:27,760 --> 00:03:30,200 Speaker 2: No you don't. That's not like a chip. We're like you, 73 00:03:30,320 --> 00:03:31,600 Speaker 2: you're not you know what I mean? Like you, you 74 00:03:31,639 --> 00:03:34,000 Speaker 2: don't start over like okay, no, no, you are sixteen 75 00:03:34,080 --> 00:03:37,040 Speaker 2: years okay? Yeah? So yeah, why are seven so hard 76 00:03:37,080 --> 00:03:38,440 Speaker 2: for people? I don't know. 77 00:03:38,480 --> 00:03:40,760 Speaker 1: I just remember being like, there's something to this. 78 00:03:41,280 --> 00:03:44,480 Speaker 2: There really is. We hit seven last year, Mike and 79 00:03:44,520 --> 00:03:46,880 Speaker 2: I didn't get to seven. We just we were gonna 80 00:03:46,920 --> 00:03:47,480 Speaker 2: celebrate ourself. 81 00:03:47,520 --> 00:03:48,560 Speaker 1: Probably would have been terrible. 82 00:03:49,320 --> 00:03:52,920 Speaker 2: Yeah, you aren't your chip anyway, honey, I'm going to 83 00:03:52,960 --> 00:03:56,880 Speaker 2: get you a chip. But yes, So what are you 84 00:03:56,920 --> 00:03:58,440 Speaker 2: guys gonna do? Tell us all about it. 85 00:03:58,720 --> 00:04:00,880 Speaker 1: We're just going to Ashville for the weekend, going to 86 00:04:00,960 --> 00:04:03,280 Speaker 1: the Grove park in and doing like the spa and stuff. 87 00:04:03,480 --> 00:04:04,880 Speaker 2: Just relax. Is it a good spather? 88 00:04:05,360 --> 00:04:07,360 Speaker 1: I have heard it is. We have not never been 89 00:04:07,400 --> 00:04:09,680 Speaker 1: to Asheville, but I have had people tell me, like, 90 00:04:10,520 --> 00:04:13,320 Speaker 1: do it and we can't go too far. The kids 91 00:04:13,320 --> 00:04:15,840 Speaker 1: are so busy all the things. We can only go 92 00:04:15,880 --> 00:04:16,479 Speaker 1: for a couple of days. 93 00:04:16,480 --> 00:04:23,320 Speaker 2: So do it is going to get debt shed a celebrator? 94 00:04:24,040 --> 00:04:28,919 Speaker 2: I really do, well, that sounds like fun. Is there anything? 95 00:04:28,520 --> 00:04:32,000 Speaker 2: So I need you to, like Ryane take two like 96 00:04:32,080 --> 00:04:38,120 Speaker 2: you really mean it? Well, but that sounds like fun. Cool? 97 00:04:38,279 --> 00:04:41,440 Speaker 2: So you know, I want to go to the next topic. 98 00:04:41,520 --> 00:04:44,680 Speaker 2: But I meant to say it was was so Jay Shetty. 99 00:04:44,800 --> 00:04:47,280 Speaker 2: I was when I was at the hospital this morning. 100 00:04:47,320 --> 00:04:49,240 Speaker 2: I was watching some of his things. Is I think 101 00:04:49,240 --> 00:04:51,400 Speaker 2: he's fabulous. I've been trying to get him on the 102 00:04:51,400 --> 00:04:57,279 Speaker 2: podcast and so anyways, he was saying that a couple 103 00:04:57,400 --> 00:05:00,360 Speaker 2: friends just got back from vacation, but he said the 104 00:05:00,400 --> 00:05:02,240 Speaker 2: girl was because complaining that I didn't feel like I 105 00:05:02,279 --> 00:05:03,760 Speaker 2: spent any time with him because he was always on 106 00:05:03,800 --> 00:05:06,520 Speaker 2: his phone or was on his iPad or so He's like, 107 00:05:06,600 --> 00:05:08,640 Speaker 2: so what were you actually looking for? Were you looking 108 00:05:08,680 --> 00:05:11,440 Speaker 2: for time spent together or were you looking for just 109 00:05:11,480 --> 00:05:14,360 Speaker 2: being away with someone, like walking into like your vacation 110 00:05:14,480 --> 00:05:18,000 Speaker 2: with an intention of Okay, we're gonna have like you know, 111 00:05:18,080 --> 00:05:21,520 Speaker 2: quality time together and doing things, or we're just gonna 112 00:05:21,680 --> 00:05:24,080 Speaker 2: be somewhere somewhere else. 113 00:05:24,279 --> 00:05:27,520 Speaker 1: Yeah, right, that's that's good. Well, I'm having a little 114 00:05:27,520 --> 00:05:29,719 Speaker 1: anxiety about it actually because at the SPA we can't 115 00:05:29,760 --> 00:05:33,080 Speaker 1: have our phone and we're at the spa day on Saturday. 116 00:05:33,160 --> 00:05:33,880 Speaker 2: That's great. 117 00:05:34,160 --> 00:05:37,680 Speaker 1: I know, I'm excited, so it'll be intentional time. 118 00:05:38,320 --> 00:05:39,000 Speaker 2: I am very. 119 00:05:38,839 --> 00:05:40,920 Speaker 1: Excited about that, but also it gives me a little 120 00:05:40,960 --> 00:05:42,320 Speaker 1: bit of an anxiety at least. 121 00:05:42,120 --> 00:05:44,400 Speaker 2: It's Saturday, because you can't all the kids will be 122 00:05:44,440 --> 00:05:47,080 Speaker 2: home first of all, I mean now home alone. 123 00:05:47,120 --> 00:05:49,720 Speaker 1: They have no my mom will be there, but like still, 124 00:05:49,920 --> 00:05:51,640 Speaker 1: you know, I'm gonna get the million texts. Wait, am 125 00:05:51,680 --> 00:05:52,320 Speaker 1: I supposed to go here? 126 00:05:52,320 --> 00:05:53,080 Speaker 2: Am I supposed to go there? 127 00:05:53,120 --> 00:05:53,600 Speaker 1: Am I supposed to? 128 00:05:53,680 --> 00:05:55,600 Speaker 2: Well? You know what, if they miss something that's fun, 129 00:05:56,080 --> 00:05:57,720 Speaker 2: it's on them. You You will write it down. You 130 00:05:57,720 --> 00:06:00,200 Speaker 2: will have everything later. I'm sure you'll have everything. So 131 00:06:00,240 --> 00:06:01,680 Speaker 2: it's like if it's at the end of the day, 132 00:06:01,720 --> 00:06:03,240 Speaker 2: it's like you've done what you've done. Now you need 133 00:06:03,279 --> 00:06:05,840 Speaker 2: to have a disconnect. 134 00:06:05,920 --> 00:06:07,000 Speaker 1: They will have a day sheet. 135 00:06:07,080 --> 00:06:10,440 Speaker 2: Yeah, just disconnect and allow them that something messes up, 136 00:06:10,440 --> 00:06:13,440 Speaker 2: which I'm sure something. Will they miss something? It's like okay, yeah, 137 00:06:13,480 --> 00:06:14,880 Speaker 2: well that's so true. 138 00:06:15,160 --> 00:06:18,040 Speaker 1: So that is kind of the plan this time is 139 00:06:18,080 --> 00:06:21,160 Speaker 1: definitely to be intentional, put the phones away as much 140 00:06:21,160 --> 00:06:23,039 Speaker 1: as we can and have sad enjoy our time. 141 00:06:23,160 --> 00:06:25,360 Speaker 2: Let's say it. Let's call it for what it is. Yeap, 142 00:06:25,839 --> 00:06:30,920 Speaker 2: I like it. You just had therapy right before this, 143 00:06:32,000 --> 00:06:34,760 Speaker 2: I drove in a silent car for about fifteen minutes. 144 00:06:35,520 --> 00:06:37,120 Speaker 1: Just so important after therapy. 145 00:06:37,160 --> 00:06:38,600 Speaker 2: But do you know, I don't know if I've said 146 00:06:38,600 --> 00:06:41,200 Speaker 2: this out loud before, but somebody told me once. I 147 00:06:41,279 --> 00:06:44,040 Speaker 2: think it was one of my other therapists. I've had 148 00:06:44,040 --> 00:06:47,680 Speaker 2: one in every state I've lived in, and it's just 149 00:06:47,800 --> 00:06:51,200 Speaker 2: really as much of a necessity as a hairstylist or 150 00:06:51,200 --> 00:06:54,839 Speaker 2: and obie. But they said that the hour after therapy 151 00:06:54,960 --> 00:06:58,359 Speaker 2: is just as important as the hour the hour of therapy. 152 00:06:59,000 --> 00:07:01,000 Speaker 2: I feel like Amy's told me that. Yeah. Really, She's 153 00:07:01,040 --> 00:07:03,520 Speaker 2: always like, don't have something work like right out? 154 00:07:03,560 --> 00:07:07,440 Speaker 1: She always tells me, and I feel so guilty to check. 155 00:07:07,680 --> 00:07:10,040 Speaker 2: This is an extension of therapy for me. Yeah, for sure. 156 00:07:10,960 --> 00:07:14,880 Speaker 2: So we have a guest coming on the show. She's 157 00:07:14,920 --> 00:07:19,000 Speaker 2: been she was on wind Down. Gosh, how long ago 158 00:07:19,080 --> 00:07:21,040 Speaker 2: was that? It was when me and my former co 159 00:07:21,120 --> 00:07:24,120 Speaker 2: host were and if you wonder where that is. You 160 00:07:24,120 --> 00:07:25,560 Speaker 2: can just look at the app because it still has 161 00:07:25,600 --> 00:07:31,160 Speaker 2: this picture. Go ahead. So she came on the show 162 00:07:31,200 --> 00:07:34,560 Speaker 2: back in twenty twenty one, so I mean almost like 163 00:07:34,760 --> 00:07:39,200 Speaker 2: right before a divorce. Her name is Rachel Yukata, and 164 00:07:39,280 --> 00:07:42,560 Speaker 2: we've become we've become friends and we' she's a she's 165 00:07:42,600 --> 00:07:48,880 Speaker 2: an awesome girl, and so question I just somebody leads. 166 00:07:48,360 --> 00:07:52,000 Speaker 1: Before she comes in. So I was reading the Rundown earlier. Okay, 167 00:07:52,000 --> 00:07:53,880 Speaker 1: so that gives me a little backstory that I needed 168 00:07:53,880 --> 00:07:56,880 Speaker 1: because I'm literally running through the rundown. I'm like, well, 169 00:07:56,960 --> 00:07:59,040 Speaker 1: Jana's going to hate this girl, like what are we doing? 170 00:07:59,280 --> 00:08:01,280 Speaker 1: And then I was I got further and I realized 171 00:08:01,320 --> 00:08:04,160 Speaker 1: that they're friends now. So you and Mike had her 172 00:08:04,200 --> 00:08:08,640 Speaker 1: on together? Did you know about infidelity when you had 173 00:08:08,640 --> 00:08:09,000 Speaker 1: her on? 174 00:08:09,280 --> 00:08:11,600 Speaker 2: I mean she was Tigerwood's mistress, that's all. 175 00:08:11,520 --> 00:08:15,520 Speaker 1: Now, But did you know about infidelity in your own marriage? 176 00:08:15,840 --> 00:08:16,040 Speaker 2: Oh? 177 00:08:16,120 --> 00:08:16,760 Speaker 1: Yeah, obviously. 178 00:08:18,360 --> 00:08:21,360 Speaker 2: Okay, I'm Janus, I'm your best friend. I would like 179 00:08:21,400 --> 00:08:22,680 Speaker 2: to introduce everybody on. 180 00:08:22,640 --> 00:08:27,160 Speaker 1: The timing and where we're at a few weeks before 181 00:08:27,200 --> 00:08:30,160 Speaker 1: we're got doors. Okay, okay, that's well, that's what I 182 00:08:30,200 --> 00:08:31,960 Speaker 1: needed to know the time okay. 183 00:08:31,960 --> 00:08:34,200 Speaker 2: But she was first noted in media because of this 184 00:08:34,280 --> 00:08:38,240 Speaker 2: like epic picture after nine to eleven yes of her 185 00:08:38,320 --> 00:08:44,960 Speaker 2: and a firefighter fiance Yeah okay, who passed? Yeah okay. 186 00:08:46,040 --> 00:08:49,440 Speaker 2: And then that was just so good. But then she 187 00:08:49,559 --> 00:08:54,240 Speaker 2: moved to Tiger Wood's mistress and I need to know more. Okay, well, 188 00:08:54,280 --> 00:08:55,520 Speaker 2: let's get her on. Let's take a break and then 189 00:08:55,520 --> 00:09:09,840 Speaker 2: get Rachel. You could tell on. Hi, guys, who are you? 190 00:09:09,960 --> 00:09:12,559 Speaker 2: I don't know you. Hi. I'm Kristen and I'm smuggling 191 00:09:12,640 --> 00:09:13,320 Speaker 2: a baby here. 192 00:09:14,440 --> 00:09:15,000 Speaker 3: Wow. 193 00:09:15,480 --> 00:09:16,880 Speaker 2: Cool, I'm Catherine. 194 00:09:17,440 --> 00:09:18,000 Speaker 1: Nice to meet you. 195 00:09:18,200 --> 00:09:22,000 Speaker 2: Hi, Nice to meet you. So since the last time 196 00:09:22,000 --> 00:09:24,840 Speaker 2: you've been on the show in twenty twenty one, obviously 197 00:09:24,880 --> 00:09:31,560 Speaker 2: my old co host has moved out literally inguratively, and 198 00:09:31,679 --> 00:09:34,160 Speaker 2: so I was like, okay, you know, trying to think 199 00:09:34,160 --> 00:09:35,920 Speaker 2: of like if I'm even going to do the show again, 200 00:09:36,120 --> 00:09:37,720 Speaker 2: what do I do? Do I keep the show alive? 201 00:09:37,760 --> 00:09:40,840 Speaker 2: And I was like, what better way to have some 202 00:09:40,920 --> 00:09:44,200 Speaker 2: new energy and fresh conversations and with your two best friends? 203 00:09:44,200 --> 00:09:47,800 Speaker 2: So of course that's on the show. So are you 204 00:09:47,800 --> 00:09:51,960 Speaker 2: guys always on it? With her? We are oh amazing, Okay, 205 00:09:51,960 --> 00:09:52,880 Speaker 2: I love that. Yeah. 206 00:09:52,920 --> 00:09:55,800 Speaker 3: So it's fun and I've seen some I've seen some episodes, 207 00:09:55,840 --> 00:09:58,040 Speaker 3: but I didn't maybe I assumed you guys were guest 208 00:09:58,080 --> 00:09:59,320 Speaker 3: hosting or I didn't really know. 209 00:09:59,440 --> 00:10:03,760 Speaker 2: So that's so awesome. How's it going. It's been really fun. Actually. 210 00:10:04,040 --> 00:10:05,760 Speaker 2: I think it's fun because we all have a different 211 00:10:05,800 --> 00:10:08,559 Speaker 2: perspective too, you know, which is nice too, and we 212 00:10:08,600 --> 00:10:12,080 Speaker 2: don't always get a I think when you aren't always along, 213 00:10:14,360 --> 00:10:16,520 Speaker 2: we don't agree always. I think that's good because who 214 00:10:16,520 --> 00:10:18,240 Speaker 2: wants to listen to something and be like I agree? 215 00:10:18,480 --> 00:10:21,360 Speaker 2: You know, I think there's going to be different other 216 00:10:21,360 --> 00:10:23,920 Speaker 2: people listening obviously that have different views and opinions, and 217 00:10:23,960 --> 00:10:25,600 Speaker 2: I think that's a good thing to be able to 218 00:10:25,800 --> 00:10:29,720 Speaker 2: kind of have those conversations. And our share levels are different. 219 00:10:30,679 --> 00:10:32,880 Speaker 2: Like open book, half open book, closed book. 220 00:10:34,800 --> 00:10:37,360 Speaker 1: You just describe this perfectly. 221 00:10:37,080 --> 00:10:40,440 Speaker 2: Literally, Yeah, what would you what would you say? You 222 00:10:40,480 --> 00:10:45,800 Speaker 2: are an open middle or closed? I'm open m I think, 223 00:10:49,120 --> 00:10:51,480 Speaker 2: And you do have a book? Are you asking? Like 224 00:10:51,559 --> 00:10:53,600 Speaker 2: if I am I an open book in my life? 225 00:10:54,480 --> 00:10:54,560 Speaker 1: Like? 226 00:10:55,440 --> 00:10:58,400 Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean what what things do you maybe like 227 00:10:58,480 --> 00:11:02,679 Speaker 2: don't talk about because you're going to talk about them now? 228 00:11:05,640 --> 00:11:08,040 Speaker 3: I'm open to talk about anything. I mean, listen. I'm 229 00:11:08,040 --> 00:11:10,320 Speaker 3: good with people. So if they steer a conversation in 230 00:11:10,320 --> 00:11:13,120 Speaker 3: a way that I don't want to have a conversation about. 231 00:11:13,240 --> 00:11:15,600 Speaker 3: I can move it to a different conversation. So where 232 00:11:15,600 --> 00:11:20,160 Speaker 3: are you from, Rachel, I'm originally from Anchorage, Alaska. Oh wow, 233 00:11:21,240 --> 00:11:23,720 Speaker 3: and then I moved to New York City when. 234 00:11:23,600 --> 00:11:25,760 Speaker 2: I was five. Yeah. New York edge is my favorite. 235 00:11:26,720 --> 00:11:30,280 Speaker 2: It's so good. It's so I love people that say 236 00:11:30,320 --> 00:11:31,679 Speaker 2: what they mean to mean what they say, and that's 237 00:11:31,720 --> 00:11:32,160 Speaker 2: New York. 238 00:11:33,160 --> 00:11:35,360 Speaker 3: Well yeah, but I think people think that New Yorkers 239 00:11:35,400 --> 00:11:38,880 Speaker 3: are like mean or rude or abrupt, and not. 240 00:11:38,760 --> 00:11:40,440 Speaker 2: All New Yorkers are like that at all. 241 00:11:40,679 --> 00:11:43,000 Speaker 3: It's and it's not even that I mean to be 242 00:11:43,080 --> 00:11:45,679 Speaker 3: abrupt or anything like that with people. But it's like 243 00:11:45,880 --> 00:11:49,000 Speaker 3: I don't come from a position really of feeling like 244 00:11:50,120 --> 00:11:51,840 Speaker 3: I hate to say this, but almost like a feminine 245 00:11:51,880 --> 00:11:54,800 Speaker 3: conversation because I don't hear my tone. So if people 246 00:11:54,800 --> 00:11:57,800 Speaker 3: complain about things about my personality, it's that it's my 247 00:11:57,920 --> 00:12:00,680 Speaker 3: tone and like I don't hear my I might be 248 00:12:00,760 --> 00:12:03,440 Speaker 3: like having a total argument with you, but I still 249 00:12:03,440 --> 00:12:05,520 Speaker 3: think I'm best friends with you, right, because I'll be like, no, 250 00:12:05,679 --> 00:12:08,680 Speaker 3: I'm just trying to get this point across and then 251 00:12:09,080 --> 00:12:10,880 Speaker 3: I'll be like, Okay, you want to get some pizza. 252 00:12:10,600 --> 00:12:12,920 Speaker 2: And they're like, you just blew me away. 253 00:12:13,000 --> 00:12:14,600 Speaker 3: You were just so mean, or you just said all 254 00:12:14,640 --> 00:12:17,199 Speaker 3: these nasty things, and I'm like thinking to myself, I 255 00:12:17,240 --> 00:12:19,320 Speaker 3: didn't say anything nasty, what do you mean? And it 256 00:12:19,360 --> 00:12:22,480 Speaker 3: was I have to like stop myself because I realized 257 00:12:22,520 --> 00:12:26,280 Speaker 3: I just am saying it without worrying about my tone, 258 00:12:26,320 --> 00:12:29,200 Speaker 3: and I don't think like, oh, this might hurt their feelings. 259 00:12:29,480 --> 00:12:31,640 Speaker 3: I don't know, you know, It's something that I've had 260 00:12:31,640 --> 00:12:34,079 Speaker 3: to work on because people don't necessarily get it unless 261 00:12:34,120 --> 00:12:36,880 Speaker 3: they've been through that kind of communication and their past 262 00:12:36,960 --> 00:12:38,800 Speaker 3: with their parents or whatever. But that's how my parents 263 00:12:38,840 --> 00:12:41,040 Speaker 3: spoke to me, so well, I think that matters. That's 264 00:12:41,040 --> 00:12:42,160 Speaker 3: why I wondered where you're from. 265 00:12:42,160 --> 00:12:43,520 Speaker 2: Well, first of all, I can tell by the accent 266 00:12:43,559 --> 00:12:45,080 Speaker 2: a little bit, which I like because I know what 267 00:12:45,080 --> 00:12:48,400 Speaker 2: I'm getting myself into. I don't like classify all New 268 00:12:48,480 --> 00:12:50,800 Speaker 2: Yorkers in one like little area. I just like to 269 00:12:50,840 --> 00:12:52,400 Speaker 2: know where people are from because it does matter. Like 270 00:12:52,440 --> 00:12:55,960 Speaker 2: we're we're all in Nashville. It's very sugary down here. 271 00:12:56,640 --> 00:12:59,760 Speaker 2: It's very bless your heart, and sometimes it feels a 272 00:12:59,760 --> 00:13:04,920 Speaker 2: litle fait. Thank you. I was that's literally what I 273 00:13:04,960 --> 00:13:06,560 Speaker 2: was going to say. But I was like, I'm going 274 00:13:06,640 --> 00:13:09,640 Speaker 2: to get just ruined on the internet. But it can 275 00:13:09,679 --> 00:13:12,280 Speaker 2: be it can't say it all is like everyone's very nice, 276 00:13:12,320 --> 00:13:13,800 Speaker 2: but it can also be like a. 277 00:13:14,280 --> 00:13:18,400 Speaker 3: Like you yeah, and I don't like that. Oh that's 278 00:13:18,400 --> 00:13:20,679 Speaker 3: really interesting, by the way. I I don't think I've 279 00:13:20,679 --> 00:13:23,680 Speaker 3: ever been to Nashville. I love Nashville. I'm dying to 280 00:13:23,800 --> 00:13:26,920 Speaker 3: find somebody that's, you know, like a country boy that 281 00:13:27,200 --> 00:13:31,400 Speaker 3: plays country music, like to be careful there. I would 282 00:13:31,679 --> 00:13:33,120 Speaker 3: love that. I would think that's so cool. 283 00:13:33,120 --> 00:13:35,760 Speaker 2: But I've been like telling you to come. I'm like, come, busy, 284 00:13:35,960 --> 00:13:36,520 Speaker 2: come visit. 285 00:13:36,760 --> 00:13:39,160 Speaker 3: I know I need to because men in New York 286 00:13:39,200 --> 00:13:42,520 Speaker 3: are completely different. There's they have the grasses, green or complex. 287 00:13:43,000 --> 00:13:46,200 Speaker 3: You know, they're always you know, hustling and you know, 288 00:13:46,320 --> 00:13:48,520 Speaker 3: trying to make a buck, and you know, it's just 289 00:13:48,679 --> 00:13:51,520 Speaker 3: a totally different vibe. Whereas also New York is a 290 00:13:51,520 --> 00:13:53,800 Speaker 3: great place to be, even for a little bit, because 291 00:13:53,880 --> 00:13:56,880 Speaker 3: it weeds out the people that can't hack it and 292 00:13:56,920 --> 00:13:59,400 Speaker 3: can't take it. Like it's one thing to be poor 293 00:13:59,440 --> 00:14:01,520 Speaker 3: in New York and have to live in a walk 294 00:14:01,600 --> 00:14:05,160 Speaker 3: up studio apartment suffer, and then even being rich in 295 00:14:05,160 --> 00:14:06,640 Speaker 3: New York is super hard. 296 00:14:06,679 --> 00:14:08,440 Speaker 2: I mean, it's all of it. 297 00:14:08,559 --> 00:14:11,800 Speaker 3: You have to have a certain personality and a drive 298 00:14:12,080 --> 00:14:14,959 Speaker 3: and be okay by yourself, and you know, you almost 299 00:14:14,960 --> 00:14:17,280 Speaker 3: feel better, Like during COVID, even when everyone was in 300 00:14:17,280 --> 00:14:19,440 Speaker 3: these apartments, you could just look out your window and 301 00:14:19,560 --> 00:14:22,200 Speaker 3: see everyone was suffering with you, and that was like, okay, cool. 302 00:14:22,240 --> 00:14:24,600 Speaker 3: But I can't imagine being in a house somewhere like 303 00:14:24,640 --> 00:14:27,520 Speaker 3: in Nashville and feel that's like, would feel really alone. 304 00:14:27,520 --> 00:14:29,840 Speaker 3: Like I didn't feel alone during COVID because I knew 305 00:14:30,240 --> 00:14:32,760 Speaker 3: all these apartments next to me were filled with hundreds 306 00:14:32,760 --> 00:14:34,640 Speaker 3: of thousands of people that were just as alone. 307 00:14:34,680 --> 00:14:34,880 Speaker 1: You know. 308 00:14:35,000 --> 00:14:38,400 Speaker 3: New York is an interesting place. It creates a toughness 309 00:14:38,440 --> 00:14:40,600 Speaker 3: in you. But I appreciate that, you know, but I 310 00:14:40,680 --> 00:14:41,960 Speaker 3: have to watch it with other people. 311 00:14:42,320 --> 00:14:44,320 Speaker 2: It is interesting with the tone though, because, like, you know, 312 00:14:44,360 --> 00:14:47,880 Speaker 2: my boyfriend's Scottish, so how they speak is a little 313 00:14:47,920 --> 00:14:49,720 Speaker 2: bit more like I've gotten used to it, but sometimes 314 00:14:49,720 --> 00:14:51,240 Speaker 2: he'll say things and I'll like look at my friends 315 00:14:51,240 --> 00:14:54,400 Speaker 2: to be like, ooh, are there like are my pasture changes? 316 00:14:54,440 --> 00:14:56,920 Speaker 2: When he talks as I'm like, oh, I feel like 317 00:14:56,960 --> 00:14:59,040 Speaker 2: I've got to get real appropriate, or I'm late, or 318 00:14:59,040 --> 00:15:01,400 Speaker 2: I've done something. You know, it's just and he's just 319 00:15:01,440 --> 00:15:06,200 Speaker 2: asking for a nice water. I've failed the King. I 320 00:15:06,240 --> 00:15:09,600 Speaker 2: don't know what's happening, but it's funny because Jenna. 321 00:15:09,680 --> 00:15:13,160 Speaker 3: I dated a guy from Scotland a couple of years ago, 322 00:15:13,480 --> 00:15:15,000 Speaker 3: and I, first of all, it took me a while 323 00:15:15,000 --> 00:15:17,000 Speaker 3: to understand what the hell he was talking about. 324 00:15:16,840 --> 00:15:18,640 Speaker 2: Because his accent was so different. 325 00:15:18,840 --> 00:15:21,600 Speaker 3: Yes, and then sometimes when I date people that have 326 00:15:21,720 --> 00:15:24,240 Speaker 3: thick accents like that, I find that I repeat them 327 00:15:24,280 --> 00:15:26,120 Speaker 3: and I try and talk about accent and it just 328 00:15:26,200 --> 00:15:27,800 Speaker 3: comes out naturally. 329 00:15:27,920 --> 00:15:30,520 Speaker 2: I don't do it for us right now because Scottish 330 00:15:30,520 --> 00:15:33,800 Speaker 2: New Yorker is something I'm really interested in. That well, 331 00:15:33,840 --> 00:15:34,479 Speaker 2: I haven't. 332 00:15:34,200 --> 00:15:36,720 Speaker 3: Talked to him in a while, so now I'm forgetting 333 00:15:36,720 --> 00:15:39,040 Speaker 3: what the Scottish accent is. But if you know somebody 334 00:15:39,480 --> 00:15:42,880 Speaker 3: had the accent next to me, I immediately know, because 335 00:15:42,920 --> 00:15:45,640 Speaker 3: it's almost like you have to decipher it, change it 336 00:15:45,680 --> 00:15:47,800 Speaker 3: in your brain to make it make sense and then 337 00:15:47,840 --> 00:15:48,920 Speaker 3: you spit out an answer. 338 00:15:49,040 --> 00:15:49,280 Speaker 2: Right. 339 00:15:49,440 --> 00:15:51,680 Speaker 3: But yeah, the time I would be on the phone 340 00:15:51,680 --> 00:15:54,000 Speaker 3: with him, be like, I need to read your lips. 341 00:15:54,040 --> 00:15:55,800 Speaker 3: You have to do this on FaceTime because I don't 342 00:15:55,800 --> 00:15:56,760 Speaker 3: know what the fuck you needs. 343 00:15:57,120 --> 00:15:59,760 Speaker 2: You can't argue with you can't argue with somebody in 344 00:16:00,080 --> 00:16:02,880 Speaker 2: their accent like that, because you just it's just too hard. 345 00:16:02,920 --> 00:16:05,080 Speaker 2: You're just like, I forgot. That's so funny. My mom 346 00:16:05,240 --> 00:16:07,240 Speaker 2: is that way. Like if she's around someone that has 347 00:16:07,280 --> 00:16:09,400 Speaker 2: like an accent, I'm actually embarrassed to be around her 348 00:16:09,440 --> 00:16:11,880 Speaker 2: because she'll start, I swear to you shall start talking 349 00:16:11,960 --> 00:16:14,720 Speaker 2: like it. But I did say something the other day 350 00:16:14,760 --> 00:16:16,560 Speaker 2: and even my ex was like, what did you just say? 351 00:16:16,560 --> 00:16:18,840 Speaker 2: Because I said, your words have changed? My words have 352 00:16:18,960 --> 00:16:21,000 Speaker 2: changed a little. I can't remember, oh I was. I 353 00:16:21,040 --> 00:16:23,600 Speaker 2: was like, that's so rubbish. And Mike go's what at 354 00:16:23,600 --> 00:16:25,440 Speaker 2: a soccer game? And I was like, oh, and he's 355 00:16:25,520 --> 00:16:26,280 Speaker 2: We just started laughing. 356 00:16:28,120 --> 00:16:29,960 Speaker 1: I've noticed that you have a lot of new words 357 00:16:29,960 --> 00:16:30,920 Speaker 1: in your vocabulary. 358 00:16:30,960 --> 00:16:34,840 Speaker 2: Well I probably needed them. So it's great. It's refreshing. 359 00:16:35,160 --> 00:16:38,240 Speaker 2: Little anyways, how's that? How's that? 360 00:16:38,320 --> 00:16:42,040 Speaker 3: Going by the way? Is its full effect? Super Strong's 361 00:16:42,280 --> 00:16:43,440 Speaker 3: it's so great. 362 00:16:43,680 --> 00:16:48,240 Speaker 2: It's like this, it's amazing. Can can say anything like 363 00:16:48,320 --> 00:16:51,800 Speaker 2: he's he's the best. It's just so easy with him. 364 00:16:52,320 --> 00:16:54,280 Speaker 3: Yeah, can I ask a question? I saw those pictures 365 00:16:54,280 --> 00:16:58,440 Speaker 3: of you on the red carpet or whatever. How did 366 00:16:58,480 --> 00:17:00,680 Speaker 3: he do being in the spot for the first time? 367 00:17:00,720 --> 00:17:03,040 Speaker 3: Have you guys talked about this already? I'm just curious, Well, 368 00:17:03,120 --> 00:17:06,480 Speaker 3: he you're who's are we on misunders podcast? 369 00:17:06,560 --> 00:17:09,040 Speaker 2: Or what are we doing now? I have questions for you? 370 00:17:09,240 --> 00:17:11,080 Speaker 2: This is like, No, she's a good she's a good podcaster. 371 00:17:12,359 --> 00:17:15,560 Speaker 2: So it's it's interesting. When I first put the dress on, 372 00:17:15,640 --> 00:17:17,480 Speaker 2: I'll be like, He's like, is that what you're wearing? 373 00:17:18,600 --> 00:17:22,200 Speaker 2: But appropriate for the king? Yeah, So he's a little 374 00:17:22,200 --> 00:17:25,399 Speaker 2: bit more conservative, right, and so I think he was like, 375 00:17:25,440 --> 00:17:27,399 Speaker 2: maybe you're beautiful, you don't need to wear that. But 376 00:17:27,440 --> 00:17:29,720 Speaker 2: in my mind, I'm like, oh, but like I you know, 377 00:17:29,760 --> 00:17:31,320 Speaker 2: I'm like I feel good and I want to wear it. 378 00:17:31,359 --> 00:17:32,840 Speaker 2: And he's like whatever, you know, He's like, you look 379 00:17:32,880 --> 00:17:35,439 Speaker 2: beautiful no matter what you wear, right, So he was 380 00:17:35,560 --> 00:17:38,000 Speaker 2: very sweet about it. But I think at first he 381 00:17:38,040 --> 00:17:43,480 Speaker 2: was a little like giving you his jacket, but you know, yeah, 382 00:17:43,520 --> 00:17:46,680 Speaker 2: he's he's just more like I guess, yeah, conservative, I 383 00:17:46,680 --> 00:17:51,000 Speaker 2: would say, but he he kept saying like because I 384 00:17:51,080 --> 00:17:52,800 Speaker 2: was like, hey, do we will you walk the carpet 385 00:17:52,800 --> 00:17:54,520 Speaker 2: with me? He's like, whatever you want? He said, this 386 00:17:54,560 --> 00:17:56,680 Speaker 2: is about you, and like, so I like that where 387 00:17:56,720 --> 00:18:00,679 Speaker 2: he wasn't trying to like he is not trying to 388 00:18:00,720 --> 00:18:04,320 Speaker 2: be all whatever up in it, so he could care 389 00:18:04,400 --> 00:18:07,119 Speaker 2: less about the same piece of thing. So that's nice. 390 00:18:07,200 --> 00:18:09,960 Speaker 3: But was he good at handling it? Like sometimes that's 391 00:18:10,000 --> 00:18:11,320 Speaker 3: that's nerve racking for people. 392 00:18:11,440 --> 00:18:13,359 Speaker 2: He was so great. He was so nice to everyone 393 00:18:13,400 --> 00:18:16,240 Speaker 2: I introduced him to and he just held my hand 394 00:18:16,280 --> 00:18:18,639 Speaker 2: the entire time like he was he was perfect. It 395 00:18:18,720 --> 00:18:19,360 Speaker 2: was really nice. 396 00:18:19,560 --> 00:18:22,600 Speaker 3: That was the first time he had done something like that. Yeah, 397 00:18:22,640 --> 00:18:23,720 Speaker 3: but he's my star. 398 00:18:25,600 --> 00:18:28,560 Speaker 2: Yeah he was a sports star. Yeah, but I mean, like, 399 00:18:28,760 --> 00:18:31,520 Speaker 2: I don't think they ever did carpets though, Okay, okay, okay, 400 00:18:31,520 --> 00:18:33,359 Speaker 2: maybe not. Yeah, I don't think so. 401 00:18:33,640 --> 00:18:35,879 Speaker 3: My first time. I've actually never told anybody. This the 402 00:18:35,880 --> 00:18:38,639 Speaker 3: first kind of celebrity that I ever dated. Do you 403 00:18:38,680 --> 00:18:43,879 Speaker 3: guys remember Michael Bergan? He was he was yeah Google, 404 00:18:43,920 --> 00:18:46,479 Speaker 3: and he was super hot. He was on Baywatch and 405 00:18:46,760 --> 00:18:50,840 Speaker 3: he used to date Carolyn Bassett and Carolyn Bassett left 406 00:18:50,920 --> 00:18:57,639 Speaker 3: him to date John Kennedy Junior. Oh okay, so Google, 407 00:18:58,480 --> 00:19:02,960 Speaker 3: and then he asked me to go and aged really nice. 408 00:19:03,160 --> 00:19:07,639 Speaker 2: Yeah he's aging. Yeah, you should call him. Can we 409 00:19:07,680 --> 00:19:10,679 Speaker 2: resurrect I mean resurrect this. I mean, look at he 410 00:19:10,680 --> 00:19:12,600 Speaker 2: looks like more handsome mister big. 411 00:19:13,520 --> 00:19:16,119 Speaker 3: Yeah, he's super handsome and by the way, one of 412 00:19:16,160 --> 00:19:18,000 Speaker 3: the nicest guys you will ever meet. 413 00:19:18,080 --> 00:19:23,160 Speaker 2: It was a real so nice. No he's not. Yeah 414 00:19:23,200 --> 00:19:26,920 Speaker 2: he is really former model and actor is now American 415 00:19:27,000 --> 00:19:32,600 Speaker 2: real estate agent Michael John Wagen in l A Beverly Hills, LA. 416 00:19:33,560 --> 00:19:39,520 Speaker 2: So his family out ahead, go ahead, tell the story. No. 417 00:19:39,600 --> 00:19:41,480 Speaker 3: So he I met him at Foxwoods and he asked 418 00:19:41,480 --> 00:19:43,520 Speaker 3: me to walk the red carpet with him. We went 419 00:19:43,560 --> 00:19:48,240 Speaker 3: to some premiere that it was a movie that Gwyneth 420 00:19:48,240 --> 00:19:51,320 Speaker 3: Paltrow was maybe she was dating him. Gwyneth Paltrow was there, 421 00:19:51,359 --> 00:19:55,560 Speaker 3: and also, oh god, Brad Pitt. Okay, so it was 422 00:19:55,600 --> 00:19:56,280 Speaker 3: a movie for them. 423 00:19:56,280 --> 00:19:56,560 Speaker 2: I guess. 424 00:19:56,560 --> 00:19:59,160 Speaker 3: I don't really remember what it was, or I think 425 00:19:59,160 --> 00:20:01,120 Speaker 3: they were dating, didn't I used to date Brad Pitt 426 00:20:01,160 --> 00:20:02,560 Speaker 3: and Gwyneth Paltrow. 427 00:20:02,200 --> 00:20:05,200 Speaker 2: So yes, anyways, they were the pit and everybody. Yes, yes, 428 00:20:05,520 --> 00:20:07,800 Speaker 2: So I remember. 429 00:20:07,480 --> 00:20:09,919 Speaker 3: Being so scared to go down the red carpet with 430 00:20:10,000 --> 00:20:14,720 Speaker 3: him because I was just like a civilian right and body, 431 00:20:15,440 --> 00:20:17,120 Speaker 3: and I didn't know what to do. And by the way, 432 00:20:17,240 --> 00:20:18,960 Speaker 3: he doesn't. He didn't tell me what to where. He 433 00:20:19,000 --> 00:20:22,119 Speaker 3: didn't tell me, So I went shopping all over the place, 434 00:20:22,560 --> 00:20:24,960 Speaker 3: and you know, I must have been I don't know 435 00:20:25,000 --> 00:20:27,080 Speaker 3: how old I was. It was when Selena came out, 436 00:20:27,080 --> 00:20:28,560 Speaker 3: because we went to the movie, so we would have 437 00:20:28,600 --> 00:20:31,040 Speaker 3: to google the date there to see how old I was. 438 00:20:31,119 --> 00:20:33,479 Speaker 3: But I was young. I was in my early twenties 439 00:20:33,600 --> 00:20:36,200 Speaker 3: or something. And I had no idea what I was doing. 440 00:20:36,200 --> 00:20:39,159 Speaker 3: And I wear the most ridiculous like black suit with 441 00:20:39,200 --> 00:20:42,960 Speaker 3: this shimmery blue. It just I looked so stupid. I 442 00:20:43,000 --> 00:20:44,680 Speaker 3: didn't get my hair blown out, I didn't have anyone 443 00:20:44,800 --> 00:20:47,560 Speaker 3: do my makeup. And he was stopped by everyone and 444 00:20:47,640 --> 00:20:49,720 Speaker 3: asked all these questions and he had he was holding 445 00:20:49,800 --> 00:20:51,880 Speaker 3: my hand and it was so cute. And I met 446 00:20:51,920 --> 00:20:54,480 Speaker 3: Brad Pitt and I met everybody. But I was super nervous, 447 00:20:54,520 --> 00:20:56,200 Speaker 3: like because I didn't feel good enough, do you know 448 00:20:56,240 --> 00:20:58,240 Speaker 3: what I mean? I felt like, how am I here 449 00:20:58,280 --> 00:21:00,800 Speaker 3: with all these people? So anyways, so I asked you 450 00:21:01,080 --> 00:21:03,040 Speaker 3: how he felt, because I remember. 451 00:21:02,840 --> 00:21:05,320 Speaker 2: Yeah, that makes sense. I think if he wasn't in 452 00:21:05,480 --> 00:21:08,159 Speaker 2: like the spotlight from soccer so much, then maybe it 453 00:21:08,200 --> 00:21:11,440 Speaker 2: would have felt like even more foreign. Yeah, for sure, 454 00:21:11,560 --> 00:21:13,439 Speaker 2: but I think because he's like been in like that, 455 00:21:13,560 --> 00:21:16,160 Speaker 2: I mean he's I'm pretty sure he's. I mean he's 456 00:21:16,160 --> 00:21:17,840 Speaker 2: maybe he's done a carpet I don't know, but like 457 00:21:18,480 --> 00:21:22,240 Speaker 2: not for like like an award thing or maybe for 458 00:21:22,280 --> 00:21:26,120 Speaker 2: sports or something. But so yeah, maybe yeah, bad news 459 00:21:26,119 --> 00:21:28,640 Speaker 2: though he's he's married, but I mean good news for him. 460 00:21:28,680 --> 00:21:32,280 Speaker 2: He's yeah, but he lives in uh Studio City with 461 00:21:32,320 --> 00:21:36,399 Speaker 2: his beautiful wife Joy. They sure two kids. Well yeah, okay, 462 00:21:36,480 --> 00:21:37,200 Speaker 2: well good for him. 463 00:21:37,240 --> 00:22:04,800 Speaker 3: Congratulations Michaelberg, and I wish. 464 00:21:52,880 --> 00:21:54,600 Speaker 2: So okay, I want to get to your podcast, but 465 00:21:54,640 --> 00:21:59,200 Speaker 2: I know these girls have questions which but you're away, 466 00:21:59,240 --> 00:22:02,119 Speaker 2: go ahead. I I want to ask one question first 467 00:22:03,880 --> 00:22:06,439 Speaker 2: because it's it's so interesting because when I had you 468 00:22:06,520 --> 00:22:09,960 Speaker 2: on the podcast first and to now I'm almost it's 469 00:22:09,960 --> 00:22:13,919 Speaker 2: so different how I like, I'm now like I'm standing 470 00:22:14,000 --> 00:22:16,280 Speaker 2: up for you or like I'm protective over you. I'm like, no, 471 00:22:16,359 --> 00:22:20,320 Speaker 2: she's my friend, like she's and so that is I 472 00:22:20,400 --> 00:22:23,640 Speaker 2: love that twist because I've been able to to talk 473 00:22:23,680 --> 00:22:26,400 Speaker 2: to you and like, I don't think we should ever 474 00:22:26,480 --> 00:22:28,720 Speaker 2: be judge for the things we did when we were 475 00:22:28,920 --> 00:22:34,160 Speaker 2: hurt or broken, and you know, in my twenties and thirty, 476 00:22:34,200 --> 00:22:37,760 Speaker 2: like this one girl I remember I was dating this 477 00:22:37,840 --> 00:22:41,400 Speaker 2: one guy post divorce, and she was talking shit about 478 00:22:41,440 --> 00:22:45,399 Speaker 2: me at this twelve thirty club to the guy that 479 00:22:45,480 --> 00:22:47,000 Speaker 2: I was hanging out with, and I was like, are 480 00:22:47,040 --> 00:22:48,480 Speaker 2: you I was like, first of all, I gave her 481 00:22:48,480 --> 00:22:49,959 Speaker 2: a hug when I walked in because I thought we 482 00:22:49,960 --> 00:22:53,199 Speaker 2: were friendly. And then with the National Sugar, yeah, this 483 00:22:53,280 --> 00:22:55,080 Speaker 2: is so, this is the National Sugar. So I gave 484 00:22:55,119 --> 00:22:56,520 Speaker 2: her a hug when I come in. I'm like, oh hey, 485 00:22:56,520 --> 00:22:58,600 Speaker 2: because like, you know, we know each other from from 486 00:22:58,640 --> 00:23:02,639 Speaker 2: the world. And then a few drinks later, you know, 487 00:23:02,760 --> 00:23:05,439 Speaker 2: come over to her and she gives me like kind 488 00:23:05,440 --> 00:23:07,800 Speaker 2: of a nasty look and he goes. The guy I 489 00:23:07,840 --> 00:23:10,200 Speaker 2: was talking to was like, well, she's talking mad shit 490 00:23:10,280 --> 00:23:13,439 Speaker 2: about you, And I said, wait what, Like I was 491 00:23:13,480 --> 00:23:16,240 Speaker 2: so confused, and she was just like, well, I just 492 00:23:16,520 --> 00:23:18,240 Speaker 2: I just don't think that he should be with you. 493 00:23:18,560 --> 00:23:21,000 Speaker 2: And I go, okay, why She's like, well, you cheated 494 00:23:21,040 --> 00:23:23,360 Speaker 2: on so and so, and I go I was twenty 495 00:23:23,560 --> 00:23:26,520 Speaker 2: and like, I'm sorry? Should I pay for my Like 496 00:23:26,600 --> 00:23:29,320 Speaker 2: I'm like, I've said I've said sorry to that person. 497 00:23:29,720 --> 00:23:32,040 Speaker 2: That was when I was twenty, like seven years old, 498 00:23:32,080 --> 00:23:35,160 Speaker 2: like can we like, are really are we here right now? 499 00:23:35,200 --> 00:23:38,679 Speaker 2: Like can people not change and grow and whatever? So 500 00:23:38,760 --> 00:23:41,520 Speaker 2: that like always stuck with me because it bothered me, 501 00:23:41,800 --> 00:23:43,399 Speaker 2: Like I don't want to be judged for how I 502 00:23:43,520 --> 00:23:45,199 Speaker 2: was back then, Like I've done a shit ton of 503 00:23:45,240 --> 00:23:47,960 Speaker 2: work to be here to not be judged for past. 504 00:23:48,080 --> 00:23:53,119 Speaker 2: So when your name obviously comes up as Tiger Woods's mistress, Like, 505 00:23:53,680 --> 00:23:56,880 Speaker 2: is it is that frustrating for you to go? God 506 00:23:57,040 --> 00:23:59,000 Speaker 2: like You're always going to have to be like on 507 00:23:59,080 --> 00:24:01,840 Speaker 2: this like defense, Yeah, because how long ago was that? 508 00:24:03,320 --> 00:24:07,000 Speaker 2: So that was two thousand and nine? Okay, so nice, 509 00:24:07,520 --> 00:24:10,560 Speaker 2: like four fourteen years, fourteen years? Do you want to 510 00:24:10,560 --> 00:24:12,720 Speaker 2: be judged for something fourteen years ago? Guys, I don't 511 00:24:12,800 --> 00:24:15,679 Speaker 2: want to be judged for anything fourteen months ago? Yeah, 512 00:24:15,800 --> 00:24:17,919 Speaker 2: I mean I really not. I don't have any dirt 513 00:24:18,200 --> 00:24:22,960 Speaker 2: Nashville sugar ade dirt. I just I mean people just change, 514 00:24:23,040 --> 00:24:27,560 Speaker 2: I mean life changes, and unfortunately we can hurt people, 515 00:24:27,680 --> 00:24:31,280 Speaker 2: hurt people, hurt people, right, so there's no excuses, Like 516 00:24:31,320 --> 00:24:34,920 Speaker 2: I will never excuse my ex's behaviors, but I can 517 00:24:34,960 --> 00:24:38,560 Speaker 2: also see growth and change in another person. I will 518 00:24:38,560 --> 00:24:40,399 Speaker 2: never excuse the stuff I did, Like I've had to 519 00:24:40,400 --> 00:24:43,199 Speaker 2: make amends with people that I was shitty to and go, 520 00:24:43,280 --> 00:24:46,480 Speaker 2: I'm really sorry and you know, and to have that 521 00:24:47,560 --> 00:24:49,960 Speaker 2: and to see the change too and to do the work. 522 00:24:50,000 --> 00:24:52,920 Speaker 2: But it's if you haven't then then that's that's another thing. 523 00:24:53,000 --> 00:24:57,480 Speaker 2: But like it's not like you're or who these people do? 524 00:24:57,480 --> 00:24:57,600 Speaker 1: You know? 525 00:24:57,640 --> 00:25:00,680 Speaker 2: I'm trying to say, like we've Yeah, it's a new era, 526 00:25:00,720 --> 00:25:02,879 Speaker 2: a new time grown, and like, yes, you know that 527 00:25:02,920 --> 00:25:05,600 Speaker 2: you've heard people and I've hurt people, You've hurt people, 528 00:25:05,680 --> 00:25:07,879 Speaker 2: but like we all have also done the work to 529 00:25:07,960 --> 00:25:10,360 Speaker 2: get to the other side. And it's also like, isn't 530 00:25:10,359 --> 00:25:11,800 Speaker 2: that kind of like the basis of what you're up 531 00:25:11,800 --> 00:25:14,520 Speaker 2: to now is that like one headline doesn't define you. 532 00:25:16,280 --> 00:25:18,359 Speaker 3: Absolutely. So there's a couple of things that I want 533 00:25:18,400 --> 00:25:19,400 Speaker 3: to just respond to and. 534 00:25:19,440 --> 00:25:21,520 Speaker 2: Yeah, tell us everything New York where we're listening. 535 00:25:23,280 --> 00:25:27,600 Speaker 3: So no, it's very hard to have a stigma that 536 00:25:27,640 --> 00:25:30,959 Speaker 3: follows you around because of a mistake that was so 537 00:25:31,119 --> 00:25:34,639 Speaker 3: publicly put out there, right, So imagine what that's like 538 00:25:34,720 --> 00:25:37,119 Speaker 3: to have one of your biggest mistakes. Everyone makes a 539 00:25:37,119 --> 00:25:39,000 Speaker 3: bunch of them, right, but like one of your biggest 540 00:25:39,040 --> 00:25:43,520 Speaker 3: mistakes that you feel personally bad about, for the entire world, 541 00:25:43,680 --> 00:25:46,560 Speaker 3: not just like your town, but the world to see 542 00:25:46,800 --> 00:25:52,600 Speaker 3: comment on, make judgments, accusations, and then hold you accountable 543 00:25:52,640 --> 00:25:54,200 Speaker 3: for something that, by the way, had nothing to do 544 00:25:54,280 --> 00:25:58,600 Speaker 3: with anyone else except for the three people involved. But then, 545 00:25:58,680 --> 00:26:02,000 Speaker 3: that story is not something that just lives for fifteen minutes. 546 00:26:02,080 --> 00:26:04,800 Speaker 3: It's a story that's continually brought up to this day, 547 00:26:04,960 --> 00:26:09,320 Speaker 3: so it's and then be associated with. So it has 548 00:26:09,400 --> 00:26:12,480 Speaker 3: been very hard to get back to what you were asking, Jana, 549 00:26:12,960 --> 00:26:17,679 Speaker 3: because people have forgiven the man in the situation. But 550 00:26:17,720 --> 00:26:21,000 Speaker 3: for me, I'm still considered like the weapon of mass destruction, 551 00:26:21,200 --> 00:26:24,119 Speaker 3: for like his actions and the way he took a 552 00:26:24,240 --> 00:26:27,160 Speaker 3: road and a path. I mean, I've talked about this before, 553 00:26:27,240 --> 00:26:30,720 Speaker 3: but you know, he was going on a path to 554 00:26:30,800 --> 00:26:33,760 Speaker 3: destruction way before I got in the picture. I just 555 00:26:33,800 --> 00:26:35,879 Speaker 3: happened to be in the passenger seat when he went 556 00:26:35,920 --> 00:26:38,840 Speaker 3: off the cliff right and happened to get quote unquote 557 00:26:38,880 --> 00:26:41,600 Speaker 3: famous from it. There was a bunch of other people involved. 558 00:26:41,600 --> 00:26:43,919 Speaker 3: There was a bunch of other women also, But for 559 00:26:44,000 --> 00:26:46,879 Speaker 3: whatever reason, you know, that story lives on in everybody's 560 00:26:46,920 --> 00:26:50,520 Speaker 3: mind and I'm the one they remember, and it's they 561 00:26:50,560 --> 00:26:53,119 Speaker 3: don't talk about his actions they just allow him to 562 00:26:53,119 --> 00:26:55,520 Speaker 3: have a comeback, right, And I'd like to come back too, 563 00:26:55,680 --> 00:26:57,640 Speaker 3: you know. Of course I've done the work. Of course 564 00:26:57,680 --> 00:27:01,679 Speaker 3: I'm very careful with my boundaries who I date, you know, 565 00:27:01,920 --> 00:27:06,000 Speaker 3: but people realize that or don't realize that it affects 566 00:27:06,080 --> 00:27:10,400 Speaker 3: you forever, like your choices affect you no matter what, 567 00:27:10,520 --> 00:27:13,440 Speaker 3: and whether it's people see what you do, you see 568 00:27:13,480 --> 00:27:13,960 Speaker 3: what you do. 569 00:27:14,080 --> 00:27:14,240 Speaker 2: Right. 570 00:27:14,320 --> 00:27:18,560 Speaker 3: So I'm very at peace with the mistakes that I've 571 00:27:18,600 --> 00:27:21,760 Speaker 3: made in the past because I've needed to do work 572 00:27:21,800 --> 00:27:24,040 Speaker 3: on them and I've grown from them. And I think 573 00:27:24,080 --> 00:27:26,119 Speaker 3: it's really important that when you do make a mistake, 574 00:27:26,200 --> 00:27:28,760 Speaker 3: you don't like deny it, you don't push it away, 575 00:27:28,920 --> 00:27:31,560 Speaker 3: Like it's so important to learn from those mistakes, because 576 00:27:31,600 --> 00:27:34,440 Speaker 3: how else are you going to get better at life. 577 00:27:34,920 --> 00:27:37,199 Speaker 3: So people have asked me before, like, oh, do you 578 00:27:37,320 --> 00:27:40,919 Speaker 3: regret that you ever met that person? Do you regret 579 00:27:40,960 --> 00:27:43,080 Speaker 3: your actions? Well, of course I regret my actions, but 580 00:27:43,160 --> 00:27:45,760 Speaker 3: I don't regret what I had to go through because 581 00:27:45,920 --> 00:27:49,080 Speaker 3: I completely have learned from it. I'm so empathetic to 582 00:27:49,119 --> 00:27:51,399 Speaker 3: other people in the situation. I know the kind of 583 00:27:51,400 --> 00:27:54,879 Speaker 3: relationships I won't get into. I know so many things 584 00:27:54,880 --> 00:27:57,680 Speaker 3: from it. So but it's more like the world hasn't 585 00:27:57,720 --> 00:27:59,800 Speaker 3: let go of it, and that makes it hard for 586 00:27:59,840 --> 00:28:01,959 Speaker 3: me to let go of it because they can. I mean, 587 00:28:02,520 --> 00:28:05,439 Speaker 3: they keep using the headline, right, and that's that's the problem. 588 00:28:05,480 --> 00:28:07,959 Speaker 3: It's like, yeah, and that's what I was when I remember 589 00:28:07,960 --> 00:28:09,480 Speaker 3: when I was married to Max. Like, I'm like, the 590 00:28:09,520 --> 00:28:11,880 Speaker 3: story will always say you cheated, So we'll either got 591 00:28:11,920 --> 00:28:14,280 Speaker 3: to turn it into lemonade and do something with it 592 00:28:14,320 --> 00:28:16,640 Speaker 3: and make it positive. And like because I'm like they 593 00:28:16,800 --> 00:28:18,880 Speaker 3: they write it over. It's like in notting Hill when 594 00:28:18,880 --> 00:28:21,960 Speaker 3: she's like, you don't understand that two seconds of me 595 00:28:22,000 --> 00:28:24,119 Speaker 3: going out it will live forever. It's not just like 596 00:28:24,119 --> 00:28:26,159 Speaker 3: a fifteen minutes and goes away, Like it'd be written 597 00:28:26,160 --> 00:28:29,000 Speaker 3: over and over and over again, the same story. And 598 00:28:29,080 --> 00:28:32,120 Speaker 3: it's like that's not fair for you. But it's really 599 00:28:32,119 --> 00:28:35,119 Speaker 3: interesting when I get into like an argument, like if 600 00:28:35,160 --> 00:28:36,840 Speaker 3: I start to date someone and then it gets to 601 00:28:36,840 --> 00:28:41,080 Speaker 3: the point where it ends, you know, inevitably, the anger 602 00:28:41,120 --> 00:28:43,880 Speaker 3: and the words and the venom that comes out of 603 00:28:44,280 --> 00:28:47,240 Speaker 3: the person that I'm ending a relationship with. Actually, whether 604 00:28:47,280 --> 00:28:50,040 Speaker 3: it's a guy or a girl as a friendship, right, 605 00:28:50,560 --> 00:28:52,800 Speaker 3: there are some sort of anger and the words come 606 00:28:52,840 --> 00:28:55,320 Speaker 3: out as you're nothing but a or you did this. 607 00:28:55,480 --> 00:28:57,040 Speaker 2: It has nothing to do with the current. 608 00:28:56,880 --> 00:28:58,880 Speaker 3: Reason of why we're not getting along or why I 609 00:28:58,920 --> 00:29:01,160 Speaker 3: can't be you know, reallyationship with them. It has to 610 00:29:01,200 --> 00:29:03,960 Speaker 3: do with, well, you're just a mistress or you know, 611 00:29:04,040 --> 00:29:05,680 Speaker 3: I can't introduce you to people because this is a 612 00:29:05,680 --> 00:29:09,320 Speaker 3: bad look for me, and I'm just like, I'm sorry, 613 00:29:09,360 --> 00:29:12,440 Speaker 3: you're stuck in fourteen years ago, not me like you know. 614 00:29:12,600 --> 00:29:15,440 Speaker 3: So it's and it's hard for me not to have 615 00:29:15,680 --> 00:29:17,160 Speaker 3: to react to that because it's hurtful. 616 00:29:17,200 --> 00:29:17,280 Speaker 2: You know. 617 00:29:17,360 --> 00:29:19,640 Speaker 3: It's hard to get my daughter into private school. It 618 00:29:19,680 --> 00:29:21,959 Speaker 3: was hard to have to deal with those moms. It's like, 619 00:29:22,280 --> 00:29:25,160 Speaker 3: you know, everyone assumes something about me. It's just not true. 620 00:29:25,240 --> 00:29:27,800 Speaker 3: I want to be married and have a family, and 621 00:29:27,840 --> 00:29:30,440 Speaker 3: I'm you know, I'm very much a recluse. I don't 622 00:29:30,680 --> 00:29:33,240 Speaker 3: do things very much with people because I don't trust anybody. 623 00:29:33,280 --> 00:29:35,560 Speaker 3: I feel like people are always judging me, and that's 624 00:29:35,600 --> 00:29:38,240 Speaker 3: really affected me to this day. You know, I'm home 625 00:29:38,360 --> 00:29:40,600 Speaker 3: a lot. I have a very small group of friends, 626 00:29:40,800 --> 00:29:42,560 Speaker 3: and even with them, I don't really talk to them 627 00:29:42,560 --> 00:29:44,320 Speaker 3: about what's going on because they don't get it. They 628 00:29:44,400 --> 00:29:46,320 Speaker 3: have not been through the things that I've been through. 629 00:29:46,440 --> 00:29:48,520 Speaker 3: They weren't engaged to somebody who was killed. They don't 630 00:29:48,520 --> 00:29:50,480 Speaker 3: have a father that died of a drug overdose. They 631 00:29:50,480 --> 00:29:53,680 Speaker 3: don't have the whole world. That's like, you know, calm 632 00:29:53,760 --> 00:29:56,200 Speaker 3: down at you. And the interactions I have with men 633 00:29:56,440 --> 00:29:59,560 Speaker 3: have been really difficult. From my first one, which was 634 00:29:59,720 --> 00:30:02,600 Speaker 3: you know, you learn unconditional love from your father. I 635 00:30:02,600 --> 00:30:05,920 Speaker 3: didn't get that, unfortunately, so I don't know how to 636 00:30:06,000 --> 00:30:07,960 Speaker 3: process that. I have to learn it almost on my 637 00:30:08,000 --> 00:30:11,160 Speaker 3: own from the interactions I have with people. And I'm 638 00:30:11,240 --> 00:30:14,000 Speaker 3: obviously not meeting great men because I'm not married yet. 639 00:30:14,080 --> 00:30:15,880 Speaker 3: You know, I've been married a couple times and those 640 00:30:15,880 --> 00:30:19,040 Speaker 3: haven't worked. So anyway, sorry for the news. 641 00:30:19,120 --> 00:30:21,200 Speaker 2: And there's a couple of divorces sitting on this couch too, 642 00:30:21,320 --> 00:30:25,400 Speaker 2: so let's be real about that. It's interesting too. I 643 00:30:25,440 --> 00:30:27,400 Speaker 2: do want to if it's okay. I know this could 644 00:30:27,400 --> 00:30:31,880 Speaker 2: be like a tender subject, but the fiance dying nine 645 00:30:31,920 --> 00:30:35,680 Speaker 2: to eleven, I mean, this is heavy stuff, Rachel. That's 646 00:30:35,720 --> 00:30:39,320 Speaker 2: like a really that's a very it's a not normal 647 00:30:39,360 --> 00:30:41,760 Speaker 2: thing to have to go through period, and then on 648 00:30:41,840 --> 00:30:44,000 Speaker 2: top of it, to have to process it and then 649 00:30:44,200 --> 00:30:48,240 Speaker 2: try to even want to love again, I'd imagine would 650 00:30:48,280 --> 00:30:51,360 Speaker 2: be a really difficult thing. Yeah. 651 00:30:51,360 --> 00:30:53,400 Speaker 3: I was twenty six when that happened. We had been 652 00:30:53,440 --> 00:30:56,520 Speaker 3: together for three years and he was, you know, six 653 00:30:56,600 --> 00:30:59,160 Speaker 3: years older than me, and we lived together, we were 654 00:30:59,200 --> 00:31:04,680 Speaker 3: planning our wedding. You know, that stays in my bones, 655 00:31:04,840 --> 00:31:07,600 Speaker 3: you know what I mean? That loss I've never gotten over, 656 00:31:07,760 --> 00:31:09,680 Speaker 3: like when I talk about it, don't talk about it 657 00:31:09,720 --> 00:31:12,160 Speaker 3: that often, but when I do, you know, immediately it 658 00:31:12,200 --> 00:31:15,480 Speaker 3: makes me very emotional because I'm clearly not over it, 659 00:31:15,560 --> 00:31:18,520 Speaker 3: do you know what I mean? It affects every decision. 660 00:31:18,560 --> 00:31:21,080 Speaker 3: It's always in the back of my head. Certain things 661 00:31:21,160 --> 00:31:23,320 Speaker 3: come up, and of course I remember that, you know. 662 00:31:24,040 --> 00:31:26,600 Speaker 3: The worst part of that of that was like the 663 00:31:26,760 --> 00:31:28,959 Speaker 3: not knowing and the fact that it was such a 664 00:31:29,000 --> 00:31:31,480 Speaker 3: crazy tragedy, and like what I had to go through 665 00:31:31,520 --> 00:31:35,640 Speaker 3: to find out he was dead, you know, and the 666 00:31:35,680 --> 00:31:38,760 Speaker 3: waiting and the wondering and then the wondering for a 667 00:31:38,800 --> 00:31:41,640 Speaker 3: long time after what he went through in those last minutes. 668 00:31:43,240 --> 00:31:45,680 Speaker 2: Sorry, that's making me emotional. I can't imagine. 669 00:31:45,720 --> 00:31:49,719 Speaker 3: It's really hard to process because you never get over that. 670 00:31:49,800 --> 00:31:52,480 Speaker 3: Like with time, the edge comes off of you, you 671 00:31:52,560 --> 00:31:55,880 Speaker 3: know what I mean. The it's not as painful, but 672 00:31:56,400 --> 00:31:58,800 Speaker 3: it's so painful because I just will never know what 673 00:31:58,880 --> 00:32:02,200 Speaker 3: those last minutes were like for him, and then the 674 00:32:02,240 --> 00:32:05,240 Speaker 3: wondering and the waiting for weeks of like am I 675 00:32:05,280 --> 00:32:07,160 Speaker 3: going to find him? Is there going to be a miracle, 676 00:32:07,880 --> 00:32:09,600 Speaker 3: even though there of course was not going to be, 677 00:32:09,640 --> 00:32:12,200 Speaker 3: but like it just it was awful. And for this, 678 00:32:12,360 --> 00:32:14,360 Speaker 3: I'm looking back now as a forty eight year old 679 00:32:14,760 --> 00:32:16,800 Speaker 3: looking back to a twenty six year old girl who 680 00:32:17,520 --> 00:32:19,680 Speaker 3: he was hard. You know, he was my everything and 681 00:32:19,880 --> 00:32:21,920 Speaker 3: I did not know what to do without him. I 682 00:32:22,480 --> 00:32:25,240 Speaker 3: was so lost because I had spent my whole life 683 00:32:25,280 --> 00:32:28,520 Speaker 3: looking for someone like him. He was so beyond wonderful 684 00:32:28,680 --> 00:32:32,520 Speaker 3: and loved me. I mean, he truly loved me, and 685 00:32:32,920 --> 00:32:36,640 Speaker 3: it was it was really hard having to come to 686 00:32:36,720 --> 00:32:41,400 Speaker 3: terms with letting him go, like realizing that I might 687 00:32:41,560 --> 00:32:42,600 Speaker 3: never find that again. 688 00:32:42,880 --> 00:32:45,720 Speaker 2: And also so public. I mean it's a very public 689 00:32:47,080 --> 00:32:51,720 Speaker 2: the whole world, but our whole nation mourned alongside every 690 00:32:51,720 --> 00:32:54,400 Speaker 2: single one of you, not even knowing your individual story, 691 00:32:54,520 --> 00:32:58,800 Speaker 2: so like you can't even escape still now you can't. 692 00:32:58,840 --> 00:33:03,680 Speaker 2: Every September eleventh, we're back to your people, you know too. 693 00:33:03,760 --> 00:33:06,200 Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean it's funny you say that, because so 694 00:33:06,280 --> 00:33:09,239 Speaker 3: many people forget I've now been through two things that 695 00:33:09,280 --> 00:33:13,280 Speaker 3: people talk about over and over, right, So Thanksgiving comes along, 696 00:33:13,280 --> 00:33:15,240 Speaker 3: they all want to talk about, you know, the crash, 697 00:33:15,320 --> 00:33:17,880 Speaker 3: or anytime Tiger plays they want to somehow bring up 698 00:33:18,040 --> 00:33:20,920 Speaker 3: the fall from Grace, you know, And then September eleventh 699 00:33:20,960 --> 00:33:22,880 Speaker 3: comes around, I have to kind of relive it, and 700 00:33:22,880 --> 00:33:25,440 Speaker 3: everyone else is just watching it on TV or talking 701 00:33:25,480 --> 00:33:27,240 Speaker 3: about the story of where they were. But for me, 702 00:33:27,400 --> 00:33:30,520 Speaker 3: it's like it's so hard to process once a year, 703 00:33:30,600 --> 00:33:33,360 Speaker 3: you know, and have to go through that and those 704 00:33:33,360 --> 00:33:36,480 Speaker 3: memories because it's not like, you know, twenty two years 705 00:33:36,560 --> 00:33:39,040 Speaker 3: has passed. It's you know, it's like it just happened 706 00:33:39,520 --> 00:33:43,160 Speaker 3: last week. I remember every detail. I remember where I was, 707 00:33:43,280 --> 00:33:46,880 Speaker 3: how I found out what I was doing, everything, And 708 00:33:46,920 --> 00:33:49,200 Speaker 3: everyone has their own story, right, But it's a moment 709 00:33:49,240 --> 00:33:53,080 Speaker 3: that changed me forever that I just I haven't been 710 00:33:53,120 --> 00:33:54,920 Speaker 3: able no matter how much work I do, to like 711 00:33:55,320 --> 00:33:58,920 Speaker 3: let that go. It's it's impossible to get rid of 712 00:33:58,960 --> 00:34:01,080 Speaker 3: that loss. 713 00:34:01,400 --> 00:34:04,240 Speaker 2: Do you in a way feel or do you think 714 00:34:04,280 --> 00:34:07,680 Speaker 2: subconsciously to your comparing maybe him to other guys that 715 00:34:07,720 --> 00:34:10,319 Speaker 2: you've dated, because it's like they don't ever stack up 716 00:34:10,360 --> 00:34:12,600 Speaker 2: to him, So it's like he's an impossible person to 717 00:34:12,960 --> 00:34:16,399 Speaker 2: ever like when you date someone or fall like fall 718 00:34:16,440 --> 00:34:19,719 Speaker 2: in love, it's like, Okay, he's not him. So it's 719 00:34:19,760 --> 00:34:21,760 Speaker 2: like you're putting other people to like his standard. 720 00:34:21,840 --> 00:34:26,319 Speaker 3: Maybe I actually don't do that because I I mean, 721 00:34:26,360 --> 00:34:28,600 Speaker 3: I probably did that early on, sure, but I don't 722 00:34:28,640 --> 00:34:31,920 Speaker 3: did that anymore because I'm not, you know, under the 723 00:34:31,960 --> 00:34:35,640 Speaker 3: guys that like thinking he's perfect. Also, you know, I 724 00:34:35,680 --> 00:34:38,200 Speaker 3: had a father who died when I was fifteen, and 725 00:34:38,320 --> 00:34:40,719 Speaker 3: for a long time, you know, I learned after that 726 00:34:40,760 --> 00:34:44,720 Speaker 3: from people like I had to realize that they weren't 727 00:34:44,760 --> 00:34:48,919 Speaker 3: perfect too, you know, and sometimes you idolize somebody because 728 00:34:48,960 --> 00:34:51,879 Speaker 3: they're dead and forget all the bad things about them 729 00:34:51,920 --> 00:34:53,959 Speaker 3: or how they treated you or how things weren't great. 730 00:34:54,000 --> 00:34:56,319 Speaker 3: Like my father was not great to me. So I 731 00:34:56,520 --> 00:34:59,160 Speaker 3: was so sad and so angry with everybody. But then 732 00:34:59,160 --> 00:35:02,200 Speaker 3: I had to realize I can't keep pretending that he 733 00:35:02,280 --> 00:35:04,400 Speaker 3: was perfect in my relationship with him was perfect. So 734 00:35:04,400 --> 00:35:06,920 Speaker 3: the same thing with Andy is that we would have 735 00:35:06,960 --> 00:35:09,520 Speaker 3: been like would we have been married twenty three years 736 00:35:09,560 --> 00:35:10,680 Speaker 3: right now twenty two years or now? 737 00:35:10,719 --> 00:35:12,520 Speaker 2: I have no idea. Would we have had kids. Could 738 00:35:12,520 --> 00:35:14,719 Speaker 2: we have gotten divorced a year later? Maybe? 739 00:35:14,960 --> 00:35:18,640 Speaker 3: So I don't want to idolize who he was and 740 00:35:18,719 --> 00:35:21,240 Speaker 3: make that up in my head. So when I date somebody, 741 00:35:21,360 --> 00:35:23,200 Speaker 3: I definitely don't think about that. Also, I was I 742 00:35:23,239 --> 00:35:24,920 Speaker 3: was a kid, then I was twenty six, you know, 743 00:35:26,160 --> 00:35:28,839 Speaker 3: and I'm a much different person now. But I do 744 00:35:29,960 --> 00:35:33,000 Speaker 3: feel a loneliness and an aching and a longing for 745 00:35:33,800 --> 00:35:36,680 Speaker 3: a companion, for like a witness to my life that 746 00:35:36,760 --> 00:35:39,600 Speaker 3: I can go through things with. And that's what I 747 00:35:39,680 --> 00:35:41,680 Speaker 3: miss in him, I don't, you know. And I know 748 00:35:41,800 --> 00:35:43,640 Speaker 3: he was so great, and I put him in his 749 00:35:43,680 --> 00:35:46,839 Speaker 3: own box, you know, I compartmentalize him. And if I'm 750 00:35:46,880 --> 00:35:48,759 Speaker 3: dating somebody, I can definitely be with them and not 751 00:35:49,160 --> 00:35:50,920 Speaker 3: and not compare them. But I think it's funny you 752 00:35:50,960 --> 00:35:53,719 Speaker 3: asked that because a lot of men compare themselves, like 753 00:35:53,719 --> 00:35:56,120 Speaker 3: when they get insecure, they're like, well, I'm not a 754 00:35:56,160 --> 00:35:58,920 Speaker 3: famous athlete or I'm not you know, Andy, that you're 755 00:35:59,120 --> 00:36:01,839 Speaker 3: going to live on in your memory forever. And it 756 00:36:01,880 --> 00:36:04,160 Speaker 3: hasn't occurred to me until they said that, you know. 757 00:36:04,480 --> 00:36:07,280 Speaker 2: So this may be you can pass on this question, 758 00:36:07,360 --> 00:36:10,439 Speaker 2: but I just feel like it might shed a little 759 00:36:10,520 --> 00:36:14,480 Speaker 2: light into your heart and the Tiger Woods portion of 760 00:36:14,520 --> 00:36:16,680 Speaker 2: your story and this could be off, so you can 761 00:36:16,719 --> 00:36:19,759 Speaker 2: pass if you want to pass. And I know you're 762 00:36:19,840 --> 00:36:22,920 Speaker 2: New York, so you just would. But do you feel 763 00:36:23,040 --> 00:36:28,080 Speaker 2: like the relationship with Tiger was a little bit I 764 00:36:28,160 --> 00:36:30,239 Speaker 2: have to I'm trying to. I'm not trying to tiptoe, 765 00:36:30,320 --> 00:36:31,759 Speaker 2: so that's not it. I just want to frame it 766 00:36:31,800 --> 00:36:34,400 Speaker 2: in the right way because I wonder if this leads 767 00:36:34,520 --> 00:36:43,320 Speaker 2: one lead thing leads to another. But was Tiger's inavailability 768 00:36:43,400 --> 00:36:47,120 Speaker 2: inside of his wildly available self? Obviously, but like there 769 00:36:47,160 --> 00:36:51,120 Speaker 2: is an inavailability about him in that moment? Is that something? 770 00:36:51,400 --> 00:36:54,320 Speaker 2: Do you think that you were attracted to the inavailability 771 00:36:54,360 --> 00:36:57,120 Speaker 2: piece because there's parts of you that were also inavailable 772 00:36:57,480 --> 00:37:00,000 Speaker 2: and unavailable unavailable? 773 00:37:00,080 --> 00:37:00,279 Speaker 3: Yeah? 774 00:37:00,440 --> 00:37:02,719 Speaker 2: Am I talking? Do I I should be on a podcast? 775 00:37:02,760 --> 00:37:05,760 Speaker 2: I have no idea how I'm talking today. The baby 776 00:37:05,920 --> 00:37:08,799 Speaker 2: is like completely consumed everything. But do you know what 777 00:37:08,800 --> 00:37:12,440 Speaker 2: I'm saying, Like, if you're unavailable and pieces of your heart, 778 00:37:12,640 --> 00:37:15,080 Speaker 2: then sometimes it makes it easier for us to make 779 00:37:15,400 --> 00:37:17,880 Speaker 2: decisions attracted to other people that are unavailable in that 780 00:37:17,920 --> 00:37:19,239 Speaker 2: way too, Because. 781 00:37:19,960 --> 00:37:25,359 Speaker 3: Yeah, so I subconsciously it wasn't like a conscious thing, 782 00:37:25,480 --> 00:37:27,799 Speaker 3: right looking back, right, right right, the things that I did. 783 00:37:28,840 --> 00:37:31,520 Speaker 3: I was attracted at that whole period in my life 784 00:37:31,840 --> 00:37:35,799 Speaker 3: to and early on to people who were unavailable. 785 00:37:35,840 --> 00:37:37,640 Speaker 2: And I think really early. 786 00:37:37,400 --> 00:37:40,000 Speaker 3: On, I was like, I don't give a shirt because 787 00:37:40,040 --> 00:37:41,719 Speaker 3: I just felt like my life had been turned so 788 00:37:41,840 --> 00:37:43,480 Speaker 3: upside down, do you know what I mean? So I 789 00:37:43,480 --> 00:37:46,440 Speaker 3: didn't I didn't think about any long term goals out 790 00:37:46,440 --> 00:37:49,799 Speaker 3: of it. I didn't think of anything like that. So 791 00:37:50,760 --> 00:37:53,600 Speaker 3: I did date a number of unavailable men. I'm not 792 00:37:53,600 --> 00:37:55,640 Speaker 3: just talking about I'm not talking about married men per se, 793 00:37:55,680 --> 00:37:58,400 Speaker 3: but in terms of like they just emotionally weren't available. 794 00:37:58,400 --> 00:38:00,400 Speaker 3: They were assholes, they were they were not I was 795 00:38:00,400 --> 00:38:03,480 Speaker 3: going to end up with. I had my version of 796 00:38:03,600 --> 00:38:06,080 Speaker 3: keeping a wall up, and I probably had a very 797 00:38:06,120 --> 00:38:09,000 Speaker 3: bad picker in the way that subconsciously I was picking 798 00:38:09,040 --> 00:38:13,800 Speaker 3: people who could not ultimately leave me because they weren't 799 00:38:13,840 --> 00:38:18,640 Speaker 3: ultimately mine. So I think that that was probably a 800 00:38:19,080 --> 00:38:21,600 Speaker 3: thing in my head that made it easier to get 801 00:38:21,600 --> 00:38:24,360 Speaker 3: involved with those kind of people. You can't lose something 802 00:38:24,360 --> 00:38:26,279 Speaker 3: you never had one of the best quotes from how 803 00:38:26,360 --> 00:38:27,520 Speaker 3: those guy in ten Days that I was. 804 00:38:27,480 --> 00:38:29,600 Speaker 2: Like, ooh, that always struggle with me too, because it's 805 00:38:29,600 --> 00:38:31,719 Speaker 2: like you can't. Sometimes we do that so that we 806 00:38:31,760 --> 00:38:35,480 Speaker 2: don't get hurt, because we've been hurt plenty before. And 807 00:38:35,520 --> 00:38:38,560 Speaker 2: I asked that because I do. I mean, there's similarities 808 00:38:38,560 --> 00:38:41,920 Speaker 2: in my past too, where I obviously, you know, I 809 00:38:41,960 --> 00:38:45,040 Speaker 2: married a boy the first time, and I did so 810 00:38:45,160 --> 00:38:46,960 Speaker 2: because I was always used to being a parent and 811 00:38:47,040 --> 00:38:50,239 Speaker 2: raising people and so it felt comfortable. But that's not 812 00:38:50,920 --> 00:38:54,279 Speaker 2: like it's not sustainable, right, So I feel like the 813 00:38:54,360 --> 00:38:56,759 Speaker 2: person like I want to just be honest, Like when 814 00:38:56,800 --> 00:38:59,800 Speaker 2: I read it and I was like, oh, Tirewood's mistress, 815 00:38:59,880 --> 00:39:02,279 Speaker 2: Like damn it. You know, like we've all been through 816 00:39:02,360 --> 00:39:04,840 Speaker 2: shitting our marriages where it's like this is not going 817 00:39:04,920 --> 00:39:08,040 Speaker 2: to be a cozy conversation, but like I really do 818 00:39:08,120 --> 00:39:10,399 Speaker 2: think it matters. Like Janna is saying that you can 819 00:39:10,520 --> 00:39:12,520 Speaker 2: change and that you are doing fourteen years of work 820 00:39:12,520 --> 00:39:14,480 Speaker 2: and that also like you can see in yourself that 821 00:39:14,719 --> 00:39:19,280 Speaker 2: unavailable found unavailable and that's just a season and unhealth 822 00:39:19,320 --> 00:39:21,480 Speaker 2: and you were just trying to you know, I mean, 823 00:39:21,520 --> 00:39:23,080 Speaker 2: we're just still all people. 824 00:39:22,920 --> 00:39:26,280 Speaker 3: Right, right, right, And I mean I think your reaction 825 00:39:26,520 --> 00:39:29,399 Speaker 3: is probably one that a lot of people get, like, ugh, 826 00:39:29,480 --> 00:39:31,440 Speaker 3: you know, do I want to deal with this type 827 00:39:31,440 --> 00:39:34,760 Speaker 3: of person or this type of conversation. But that's again, 828 00:39:34,840 --> 00:39:37,480 Speaker 3: it was over a decade ago, right, It's not who 829 00:39:37,560 --> 00:39:38,280 Speaker 3: I am, it's. 830 00:39:38,120 --> 00:39:39,160 Speaker 2: Not who defines me. 831 00:39:39,719 --> 00:39:43,759 Speaker 3: And you know, I've realized that when you're without a purpose, 832 00:39:44,120 --> 00:39:46,640 Speaker 3: you really falter. You make a ton of mistakes. And 833 00:39:47,200 --> 00:39:49,400 Speaker 3: you know, I it's taken me a long time to 834 00:39:49,520 --> 00:39:52,880 Speaker 3: find my purpose, no matter what people say to me 835 00:39:53,000 --> 00:39:56,040 Speaker 3: or give me pushback on. And that has started with 836 00:39:56,200 --> 00:39:58,160 Speaker 3: like this podcast that I'm doing, which you know, I 837 00:39:58,280 --> 00:40:02,239 Speaker 3: titled it Misunderstood, because I feel like there are so 838 00:40:02,239 --> 00:40:05,200 Speaker 3: many people whose stories get narrated for them and they 839 00:40:05,239 --> 00:40:07,920 Speaker 3: don't have the chance to speak. And it's okay to 840 00:40:08,360 --> 00:40:10,680 Speaker 3: you know, change who you are, have your own version, 841 00:40:11,239 --> 00:40:15,920 Speaker 3: as long as you don't you know, make excuses, do 842 00:40:15,960 --> 00:40:19,680 Speaker 3: you know what I mean? So my story personally was 843 00:40:19,840 --> 00:40:23,319 Speaker 3: for in a number of different avenues told for me, 844 00:40:23,600 --> 00:40:26,120 Speaker 3: even the way I was chosen to be seen as 845 00:40:26,120 --> 00:40:28,839 Speaker 3: a victim during September eleventh, and I had a very 846 00:40:28,840 --> 00:40:31,160 Speaker 3: famous photo that was on the cover of almost every 847 00:40:31,200 --> 00:40:34,319 Speaker 3: newspaper in the world after September eleventh, which is in 848 00:40:34,360 --> 00:40:37,800 Speaker 3: the Smithsonian. It's in a bunch of you know, museums 849 00:40:37,800 --> 00:40:41,440 Speaker 3: and stuff, and so people saw me as a victim, which, 850 00:40:41,520 --> 00:40:44,000 Speaker 3: by the way, helped me get through that time, because 851 00:40:44,000 --> 00:40:46,160 Speaker 3: it's not like, you know, somebody's just dying that I know, 852 00:40:46,760 --> 00:40:50,440 Speaker 3: or had gotten into an accident. Me personally, the whole 853 00:40:50,480 --> 00:40:54,080 Speaker 3: world was grieving, but also they were following Andy's story. 854 00:40:54,120 --> 00:40:55,839 Speaker 3: They wanted to know if I found him, They wanted 855 00:40:55,880 --> 00:40:57,840 Speaker 3: to know if I heard from him. They wanted to 856 00:40:57,840 --> 00:41:01,720 Speaker 3: know the details of him, and that allowed me to 857 00:41:01,760 --> 00:41:02,600 Speaker 3: tell people the. 858 00:41:02,600 --> 00:41:03,520 Speaker 2: Story of Andy. 859 00:41:03,680 --> 00:41:07,160 Speaker 3: So through this process, I've realized that it's so great 860 00:41:07,160 --> 00:41:09,080 Speaker 3: for me to have a podcast where I don't necessarily 861 00:41:09,160 --> 00:41:11,759 Speaker 3: have to talk about myself, even though I try to, 862 00:41:12,480 --> 00:41:15,560 Speaker 3: you know, incorporate pieces of me in every interview, but 863 00:41:15,640 --> 00:41:18,040 Speaker 3: I try to talk to people or talk about subjects 864 00:41:18,239 --> 00:41:21,120 Speaker 3: that I feel like, you know, are misunderstood or should 865 00:41:21,160 --> 00:41:23,400 Speaker 3: be talked about more, should be reconsidered. 866 00:41:23,719 --> 00:41:25,640 Speaker 2: Because it was a horrible. 867 00:41:25,239 --> 00:41:27,680 Speaker 3: Feeling for me to you know, I wouldn't have been 868 00:41:27,680 --> 00:41:30,160 Speaker 3: friends with you guys right back then, and then now 869 00:41:30,360 --> 00:41:31,880 Speaker 3: a lot of people don't want to be friends with 870 00:41:31,880 --> 00:41:33,759 Speaker 3: me because of something that happened so long ago. So 871 00:41:33,800 --> 00:41:36,080 Speaker 3: and that's just not fair to me, because it's lonely 872 00:41:36,200 --> 00:41:37,959 Speaker 3: and it's it's hard being misunderstood. 873 00:41:38,160 --> 00:41:40,560 Speaker 2: Well, there's also a certain level of like ownership that 874 00:41:40,640 --> 00:41:43,719 Speaker 2: you just exude that I think makes it easy to 875 00:41:43,880 --> 00:41:46,080 Speaker 2: like like you and love you. I mean, we all 876 00:41:46,080 --> 00:41:48,600 Speaker 2: make mistakes. That's it is, what it is, you know. 877 00:42:01,640 --> 00:42:04,799 Speaker 1: Well that was kind of my next question because you know, 878 00:42:05,520 --> 00:42:07,239 Speaker 1: Jana and I talk about this all the time, like 879 00:42:07,360 --> 00:42:10,439 Speaker 1: changing the narrative, Like how are you going to take 880 00:42:10,480 --> 00:42:12,640 Speaker 1: these headlines and change the narrative? And I know that's 881 00:42:12,680 --> 00:42:14,759 Speaker 1: not easy because it's just it shows up and it 882 00:42:14,760 --> 00:42:16,600 Speaker 1: shows up. And you kind of touched on that a 883 00:42:16,600 --> 00:42:19,480 Speaker 1: little bit with your podcast, But like, how are you 884 00:42:19,640 --> 00:42:22,040 Speaker 1: changing the narrative? Like what is your purpose now? 885 00:42:22,280 --> 00:42:24,120 Speaker 2: What is like? What are you about? 886 00:42:24,280 --> 00:42:28,520 Speaker 1: Like it's you're not about you know, you're being a mistress. 887 00:42:28,560 --> 00:42:31,040 Speaker 1: You're not about your dead. I mean, like who are 888 00:42:31,120 --> 00:42:33,520 Speaker 1: you and what are you doing now to change that narrative. 889 00:42:33,880 --> 00:42:37,600 Speaker 3: I think I've changed my narrative internally first and try 890 00:42:37,600 --> 00:42:39,080 Speaker 3: to figure out who I am. And by the way, 891 00:42:39,120 --> 00:42:42,560 Speaker 3: I think that's probably a lifelong struggle because what I'm 892 00:42:42,600 --> 00:42:45,360 Speaker 3: looking for is happiness. And I think for so long, 893 00:42:45,480 --> 00:42:47,319 Speaker 3: and Jana, I think you and I have talked about this, 894 00:42:47,880 --> 00:42:50,040 Speaker 3: I have struggled and you have struggled to with looking 895 00:42:50,080 --> 00:42:54,040 Speaker 3: for happiness externally or outside of us, and that clearly 896 00:42:54,040 --> 00:42:57,319 Speaker 3: becomes a man or a relationship. And I have found 897 00:42:57,360 --> 00:43:00,279 Speaker 3: my credibility based on who I'm dating, and I think 898 00:43:00,320 --> 00:43:02,440 Speaker 3: for me, it's done a lot of work to realize, Okay, 899 00:43:02,719 --> 00:43:05,840 Speaker 3: I can't make my happiness dependent on someone else, especially 900 00:43:05,920 --> 00:43:08,319 Speaker 3: a man, because that'll always fall through. And even if 901 00:43:08,360 --> 00:43:10,360 Speaker 3: I marry somebody and stay married to them, it's not 902 00:43:10,440 --> 00:43:13,440 Speaker 3: their responsibility to make me happy, to make me successful, 903 00:43:13,680 --> 00:43:15,439 Speaker 3: to make me all these things. I have to really 904 00:43:15,520 --> 00:43:18,359 Speaker 3: figure that out for myself. So I constantly am trying 905 00:43:18,360 --> 00:43:21,400 Speaker 3: to figure out my purpose and whether or not that 906 00:43:21,560 --> 00:43:24,960 Speaker 3: is helping other people or just getting through the day 907 00:43:25,000 --> 00:43:26,799 Speaker 3: to figure out what my purpose is in that day. 908 00:43:26,800 --> 00:43:29,520 Speaker 3: But like, I'm not somebody who bases my life on 909 00:43:29,600 --> 00:43:32,799 Speaker 3: men anymore at all. I'm actually quite cold to most men. 910 00:43:32,880 --> 00:43:36,040 Speaker 3: I don't even really date that much anymore because it's 911 00:43:36,400 --> 00:43:39,960 Speaker 3: very hard for me to give a piece of myself 912 00:43:40,239 --> 00:43:43,040 Speaker 3: because I've worked so hard on like being in the 913 00:43:43,040 --> 00:43:45,839 Speaker 3: moment and being okay that I almost it's it's hard 914 00:43:45,840 --> 00:43:49,919 Speaker 3: for me now to want to date anymore because it backfires, 915 00:43:50,000 --> 00:43:52,160 Speaker 3: you know. And I and I and I picked the 916 00:43:52,160 --> 00:43:54,359 Speaker 3: wrong people or I pick the right people and that's 917 00:43:54,400 --> 00:43:57,520 Speaker 3: just the wrong timing or whatever. So I've my whole 918 00:43:57,560 --> 00:44:00,319 Speaker 3: purpose is to figure out what I can do to 919 00:44:00,360 --> 00:44:03,520 Speaker 3: be successful and be happy without someone else. And it's 920 00:44:03,719 --> 00:44:06,640 Speaker 3: taking me a long time, but it's what I'm working on, right, 921 00:44:07,040 --> 00:44:09,400 Speaker 3: So great, I answer your question. 922 00:44:10,080 --> 00:44:13,839 Speaker 2: Yeah, And I just like, you know, as someone like 923 00:44:13,920 --> 00:44:16,640 Speaker 2: we're we love to love, right, I just I want, like, 924 00:44:16,719 --> 00:44:19,200 Speaker 2: I want all of that for you because you everyone 925 00:44:19,239 --> 00:44:21,480 Speaker 2: deserves to be happy, and you know, as even having 926 00:44:21,480 --> 00:44:23,759 Speaker 2: a conversation with my AX, it's like, you know, he 927 00:44:23,840 --> 00:44:26,799 Speaker 2: has the headlines right, and so that might can that 928 00:44:26,840 --> 00:44:30,040 Speaker 2: could cause potential and it might have you know, in 929 00:44:30,480 --> 00:44:33,120 Speaker 2: dating situations, and it's like I never want someone to 930 00:44:33,400 --> 00:44:38,040 Speaker 2: have to struggle with moving on because of past things. 931 00:44:38,080 --> 00:44:40,400 Speaker 2: Like that's just not fair no matter, because I'm like, 932 00:44:40,480 --> 00:44:43,360 Speaker 2: what you did to someone else, you're not going to 933 00:44:43,400 --> 00:44:45,960 Speaker 2: do Like they're not gonna hopefully not repeat if they've 934 00:44:46,000 --> 00:44:47,800 Speaker 2: done the work right, So it's like they shouldn't be 935 00:44:47,880 --> 00:44:53,000 Speaker 2: judged because of the chapter that was hard and not good, right, 936 00:44:53,200 --> 00:44:55,439 Speaker 2: So but I just it's good. 937 00:44:55,640 --> 00:44:58,160 Speaker 3: It's so hard at our age finding I mean, I 938 00:44:58,160 --> 00:45:01,360 Speaker 3: think I'm older than you guys, but finding new friends 939 00:45:01,400 --> 00:45:03,640 Speaker 3: and finding your new circle of people that you can 940 00:45:03,680 --> 00:45:05,759 Speaker 3: trust too. Right, So, like I wish I lived in 941 00:45:05,840 --> 00:45:07,359 Speaker 3: Nashville so I could come and hang out with you, 942 00:45:07,360 --> 00:45:11,160 Speaker 3: I can talk about I'm going to But like it's 943 00:45:11,320 --> 00:45:14,680 Speaker 3: like I don't have that many friends that are either 944 00:45:14,800 --> 00:45:16,839 Speaker 3: single or in my you know, I'm a single mom, 945 00:45:16,920 --> 00:45:19,839 Speaker 3: and I'm you know, constantly just struggling with certain things. 946 00:45:19,880 --> 00:45:21,319 Speaker 3: And I want to be able to go out and 947 00:45:21,520 --> 00:45:24,440 Speaker 3: have fun and you know, get a release of like 948 00:45:24,520 --> 00:45:28,520 Speaker 3: being with some really good friends. And but it's hard 949 00:45:28,560 --> 00:45:30,120 Speaker 3: to find people that I can trust. It's hard to 950 00:45:30,160 --> 00:45:32,160 Speaker 3: find people in my same situation. It's hard to find 951 00:45:32,200 --> 00:45:34,520 Speaker 3: people that are not going to push me in the 952 00:45:34,560 --> 00:45:36,720 Speaker 3: wrong direction for their own benefit. 953 00:45:37,160 --> 00:45:38,080 Speaker 2: And so it's just. 954 00:45:38,040 --> 00:45:40,840 Speaker 3: Made me kind of fall into myself and become a recluse. 955 00:45:40,840 --> 00:45:42,279 Speaker 3: But I need to work on getting out of that. 956 00:45:42,440 --> 00:45:44,640 Speaker 3: So I'm going to have to call you, Jenna, and 957 00:45:44,960 --> 00:45:46,200 Speaker 3: make it go. 958 00:45:46,280 --> 00:45:48,960 Speaker 2: Out there this cocoon. We'll just cocoon with you here 959 00:45:49,080 --> 00:45:51,279 Speaker 2: and we just we're a different cocoon. But you can 960 00:45:51,320 --> 00:45:54,280 Speaker 2: just fly here and we'll too. We'll just recluse together 961 00:45:54,560 --> 00:45:56,520 Speaker 2: with someone and then we'll go out and you know, 962 00:45:56,600 --> 00:45:58,640 Speaker 2: try to introduce you to a nice little country boy. 963 00:45:59,239 --> 00:46:01,520 Speaker 2: There's easy the country boys. I don'trust anybody either, so 964 00:46:02,680 --> 00:46:06,040 Speaker 2: wet that there be. Yeah, but everyone listened and misunderstood 965 00:46:06,680 --> 00:46:09,640 Speaker 2: our friend Rachel. You could tell his podcast. Thank you 966 00:46:09,920 --> 00:46:10,920 Speaker 2: so much for coming on. 967 00:46:11,480 --> 00:46:13,400 Speaker 1: Thank you, thank you amazing. 968 00:46:13,760 --> 00:46:18,920 Speaker 2: Okay, yeah, thank you. All right, thoughts, I talked a 969 00:46:18,920 --> 00:46:25,040 Speaker 2: lot because I really just a fascinated great She's incredible, 970 00:46:25,120 --> 00:46:28,000 Speaker 2: and I guess you know, it's also the time warp 971 00:46:28,080 --> 00:46:30,480 Speaker 2: of it being fourteen years ago is insane to me. 972 00:46:32,040 --> 00:46:34,000 Speaker 1: It's just really I mean, I know we live it 973 00:46:34,040 --> 00:46:36,560 Speaker 1: every day with you, Jana, but it's just like really 974 00:46:36,600 --> 00:46:38,839 Speaker 1: reinforces me and you just you can't get away from 975 00:46:38,840 --> 00:46:42,360 Speaker 1: a headline. Man. It's like, once you're known for something 976 00:46:42,520 --> 00:46:44,200 Speaker 1: like that, you always are. 977 00:46:44,640 --> 00:46:47,160 Speaker 2: And the pool of people that are healthy enough to 978 00:46:47,280 --> 00:46:49,359 Speaker 2: know that it takes ownership and people are people and 979 00:46:49,440 --> 00:46:51,920 Speaker 2: all the things is so tiny. And I mean look 980 00:46:51,920 --> 00:46:53,839 Speaker 2: at all the like you know from her from her dad, 981 00:46:54,280 --> 00:46:56,759 Speaker 2: you know fifteen, the drugs and the you know, the 982 00:46:57,280 --> 00:46:58,920 Speaker 2: death of a nil. I mean that's a lot of 983 00:46:59,040 --> 00:47:02,799 Speaker 2: really hard things that not many people, not everybody goes through, 984 00:47:02,880 --> 00:47:05,120 Speaker 2: so imagine like you don't know what you would do, 985 00:47:05,239 --> 00:47:08,240 Speaker 2: and that's you know again, people were hurt in the situation, 986 00:47:08,360 --> 00:47:11,120 Speaker 2: like Tiger's wife and this some you know, but I 987 00:47:11,160 --> 00:47:13,040 Speaker 2: don't think on the record for saying like she was 988 00:47:13,120 --> 00:47:16,399 Speaker 2: not the only person Tiger was involved with, right, and 989 00:47:16,920 --> 00:47:20,399 Speaker 2: again like it's the you know, hurt people hurt people 990 00:47:20,640 --> 00:47:21,160 Speaker 2: go back to that. 991 00:47:21,400 --> 00:47:24,920 Speaker 1: Yeah, and it's antant, I mean, an unfortunate situation. But 992 00:47:25,040 --> 00:47:26,799 Speaker 1: she was lovely. I loved meeting her. 993 00:47:26,880 --> 00:47:29,600 Speaker 2: I love anybody that just owns shit and just really 994 00:47:29,680 --> 00:47:32,120 Speaker 2: tries to see why she's my friend? Yeah, I did. 995 00:47:32,120 --> 00:47:35,120 Speaker 2: I didn't. I have the same energy that y'all had 996 00:47:35,160 --> 00:47:36,319 Speaker 2: going into I was like, I don't want to talk 997 00:47:36,320 --> 00:47:38,600 Speaker 2: to her. Yeah, I didn't want to like her. I 998 00:47:38,640 --> 00:47:39,960 Speaker 2: was like, because I want to be like because I 999 00:47:40,000 --> 00:47:41,439 Speaker 2: said to her, I was like, so I'm the wife, 1000 00:47:41,560 --> 00:47:43,000 Speaker 2: why would you do that? She's like, I didn't even 1001 00:47:43,040 --> 00:47:45,279 Speaker 2: think she was. I don't And I wasn't thinking about 1002 00:47:45,280 --> 00:47:48,480 Speaker 2: the other wife, of course. I mean their own hurt 1003 00:47:49,160 --> 00:47:51,799 Speaker 2: and I'm not defending like well, like when I talked 1004 00:47:51,800 --> 00:47:55,120 Speaker 2: to like Ex's mistress, she was also married, you know, 1005 00:47:55,160 --> 00:47:57,920 Speaker 2: I'm like, so, I'm like, and you knew I was pregnant, 1006 00:47:58,080 --> 00:48:00,200 Speaker 2: like you know, and so I'm like, what were you thinking? 1007 00:48:00,200 --> 00:48:02,000 Speaker 2: Like how could you do that to a pregnant wife? 1008 00:48:02,040 --> 00:48:04,760 Speaker 2: And she's just like, I just I have a problem. 1009 00:48:04,880 --> 00:48:07,480 Speaker 2: You know that I didn't understand that then I get 1010 00:48:07,520 --> 00:48:10,280 Speaker 2: it now, but like you know, yeah, well no, Also 1011 00:48:10,440 --> 00:48:13,520 Speaker 2: just that there's always two sides to every story too, 1012 00:48:13,560 --> 00:48:16,279 Speaker 2: And I'm not excusing any of that, but like there 1013 00:48:16,320 --> 00:48:19,080 Speaker 2: are times where these guys go out and I've seen 1014 00:48:19,080 --> 00:48:22,960 Speaker 2: this even in our own industry, and they say a 1015 00:48:23,000 --> 00:48:25,919 Speaker 2: story that is not true. So like they're telling these 1016 00:48:25,960 --> 00:48:28,760 Speaker 2: girls were separated. I know, it looks like we're married. 1017 00:48:29,280 --> 00:48:32,040 Speaker 2: They're you know, divorce is coming or blah blah blah, 1018 00:48:32,040 --> 00:48:35,760 Speaker 2: and these girls are like, oh, well listen, And everyone 1019 00:48:35,760 --> 00:48:37,520 Speaker 2: can have their own opinions about everything, but like I'm 1020 00:48:37,560 --> 00:48:40,239 Speaker 2: just saying, like sometimes they're not going into it going 1021 00:48:40,600 --> 00:48:44,040 Speaker 2: he's married and has kids. They might have heard from 1022 00:48:44,080 --> 00:48:47,239 Speaker 2: the source a different narrative. Altogether, the reality is we 1023 00:48:47,320 --> 00:48:49,919 Speaker 2: never know the full story. Sure doesn't excuse the action, 1024 00:48:50,040 --> 00:48:51,880 Speaker 2: but we never know the full story. Yeah. 1025 00:48:51,920 --> 00:48:54,200 Speaker 1: From a headline, especially. 1026 00:48:53,840 --> 00:48:57,200 Speaker 2: Especially a headline, I just it just seems very unfair 1027 00:48:57,239 --> 00:48:59,200 Speaker 2: and even like like I said, with my like I 1028 00:48:59,239 --> 00:49:02,040 Speaker 2: have empathy in a way for like I wouldn't want 1029 00:49:02,200 --> 00:49:06,240 Speaker 2: that adline when I go out and date someone new. 1030 00:49:06,280 --> 00:49:09,120 Speaker 1: One you've had to deal with similar situations, like. 1031 00:49:09,040 --> 00:49:11,839 Speaker 2: You've been married these many times, and I'm like, yeah, 1032 00:49:11,880 --> 00:49:15,439 Speaker 2: you know global, Yeah, yeah, yes I have and here 1033 00:49:15,560 --> 00:49:17,880 Speaker 2: but but I but I was saying, actually this too. 1034 00:49:18,000 --> 00:49:19,800 Speaker 2: We were in the car back from surgery and we 1035 00:49:19,840 --> 00:49:22,560 Speaker 2: were kind of talking about stuff, and I said, the second, 1036 00:49:22,760 --> 00:49:24,480 Speaker 2: you know, we were just talking about dating, and I go, 1037 00:49:24,520 --> 00:49:26,240 Speaker 2: the second you feel like you have to defend yourself 1038 00:49:26,480 --> 00:49:28,200 Speaker 2: to someone, like that's not going to be the right 1039 00:49:28,239 --> 00:49:30,360 Speaker 2: person for you, because like they should have see the 1040 00:49:30,440 --> 00:49:34,279 Speaker 2: work or whatever, Like I just shouldn't have to because 1041 00:49:34,280 --> 00:49:36,319 Speaker 2: I always felt like I had to defend myself like 1042 00:49:36,360 --> 00:49:38,560 Speaker 2: well I this, that and the other end like and 1043 00:49:38,640 --> 00:49:40,960 Speaker 2: to keep defending it. And it's like this is what 1044 00:49:41,000 --> 00:49:42,640 Speaker 2: I did, this is what I've learned, and this is 1045 00:49:42,640 --> 00:49:45,480 Speaker 2: why I'm now. Yeah, like I carried shame of that 1046 00:49:45,560 --> 00:49:49,839 Speaker 2: divorce for so long. It served me zero right And 1047 00:49:49,880 --> 00:49:52,160 Speaker 2: how many times did you try to defend And no 1048 00:49:52,360 --> 00:49:55,520 Speaker 2: it didn't even matter. I know it's because the right 1049 00:49:55,560 --> 00:49:59,440 Speaker 2: people will will see and hear instead, yeah and understand 1050 00:49:59,480 --> 00:50:01,160 Speaker 2: that sometimes people don't bring out the best in each 1051 00:50:01,200 --> 00:50:04,719 Speaker 2: other either, right, Yeah, well, I'm glad you came on 1052 00:50:04,760 --> 00:50:06,759 Speaker 2: because I just I truly just like and it's just 1053 00:50:07,000 --> 00:50:10,239 Speaker 2: I just want everyone. And I said this too back 1054 00:50:10,600 --> 00:50:12,359 Speaker 2: riding back in the card. I'm like, I have said 1055 00:50:12,360 --> 00:50:13,840 Speaker 2: this a million times, but I just want everyone to 1056 00:50:13,840 --> 00:50:15,960 Speaker 2: be happy. I want, like, I wish everybody well. I 1057 00:50:16,040 --> 00:50:18,000 Speaker 2: genuinely do. Like even the girl that was talking crap 1058 00:50:18,000 --> 00:50:20,040 Speaker 2: about me in the club, I don't I love, Like, 1059 00:50:20,560 --> 00:50:22,359 Speaker 2: can we just all me nice? You don't have to 1060 00:50:22,400 --> 00:50:24,640 Speaker 2: like me, but let's just wish e other well. Yeah, like, 1061 00:50:25,239 --> 00:50:28,759 Speaker 2: just like we can drop dead literally right now. It's 1062 00:50:28,960 --> 00:50:31,600 Speaker 2: too short. That's why I'm like when I when I 1063 00:50:31,640 --> 00:50:33,400 Speaker 2: think about the Reddit, people are like, you need to 1064 00:50:33,480 --> 00:50:36,239 Speaker 2: like people are I'm like, ah, I honestly wish them well. 1065 00:50:36,320 --> 00:50:38,319 Speaker 2: Like I'm like, I hate that they hate me so much. 1066 00:50:38,360 --> 00:50:40,719 Speaker 2: But the other on the other side of it, I'm like, 1067 00:50:41,080 --> 00:50:43,240 Speaker 2: I don't want that, Like I literally could die tomorrow. 1068 00:50:43,320 --> 00:50:45,560 Speaker 2: Like if you want to spend your days being mean 1069 00:50:45,600 --> 00:50:48,200 Speaker 2: to other people, that's on you. Yeah, Like I don't. 1070 00:50:48,239 --> 00:50:50,440 Speaker 2: I don't want that. No, Like, and I don't want 1071 00:50:50,480 --> 00:50:53,280 Speaker 2: to take it a received. Let the gas in like, yeah, 1072 00:50:53,400 --> 00:50:56,440 Speaker 2: I'm good. It just can even just be nice. Yeah, 1073 00:50:56,680 --> 00:50:59,200 Speaker 2: that's all. Everyone's got their own walk love. 1074 00:51:00,719 --> 00:51:03,120 Speaker 1: Do something nice today for somebody. 1075 00:51:03,400 --> 00:51:06,080 Speaker 2: Yeah somebody I did earlier, but I can't really say 1076 00:51:06,080 --> 00:51:08,200 Speaker 2: it because that would sound bad. Yeah, let's not say 1077 00:51:08,239 --> 00:51:10,600 Speaker 2: that very nice. 1078 00:51:11,160 --> 00:51:16,759 Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, you know another story, more nice things everybody. 1079 00:51:16,880 --> 00:51:18,759 Speaker 1: If you want to get behind your keyboard or if 1080 00:51:18,800 --> 00:51:20,680 Speaker 1: you want to be mean to somebody, think twice, just 1081 00:51:20,680 --> 00:51:21,120 Speaker 1: be nice. 1082 00:51:21,239 --> 00:51:24,120 Speaker 2: Yeah. And I know that's but again, like just there's 1083 00:51:24,160 --> 00:51:28,040 Speaker 2: always more to a story, right, Like I keep thinking 1084 00:51:28,040 --> 00:51:30,759 Speaker 2: about the story that came up. Did you I see 1085 00:51:30,800 --> 00:51:35,440 Speaker 2: the popcorn debacle? I actually heard about the I'm very 1086 00:51:35,440 --> 00:51:37,080 Speaker 2: out of touch in this one I know about yeah 1087 00:51:37,120 --> 00:51:42,520 Speaker 2: yeah yeah, yeah with Sydney or Bassa just yes, James 1088 00:51:42,560 --> 00:51:44,600 Speaker 2: the sister about Yeah, there was like this huge popcorn 1089 00:51:44,680 --> 00:51:46,920 Speaker 2: thing and I think everyone's just going to like, well 1090 00:51:46,960 --> 00:51:49,000 Speaker 2: your kids stuff pick up thing. I'm like, hey, you 1091 00:51:49,000 --> 00:51:50,640 Speaker 2: don't know the tone of things. But at the end 1092 00:51:50,640 --> 00:51:52,520 Speaker 2: of the day, like why are we just just like okay, 1093 00:51:52,600 --> 00:51:54,440 Speaker 2: like it doesn't have to be so mean with the 1094 00:51:54,440 --> 00:51:56,320 Speaker 2: comments too, Like I agree, yeah, you don't have to 1095 00:51:56,360 --> 00:51:58,960 Speaker 2: pick a side. I can. Yeah. I just feel like 1096 00:51:58,960 --> 00:52:01,400 Speaker 2: get all is going like like mean and to the 1097 00:52:01,440 --> 00:52:03,239 Speaker 2: mom like, well she should pick up the stuff, which 1098 00:52:03,280 --> 00:52:05,680 Speaker 2: I agree, like I would pick pick up things. At 1099 00:52:05,680 --> 00:52:08,000 Speaker 2: the same time, like, you know, we don't know the 1100 00:52:08,040 --> 00:52:10,319 Speaker 2: circumstances of how the flight attendant said it. We don't know, 1101 00:52:10,400 --> 00:52:11,800 Speaker 2: Like you know, there's just so many things. 1102 00:52:12,080 --> 00:52:13,479 Speaker 1: I just think I wish I was on the plane 1103 00:52:13,480 --> 00:52:15,160 Speaker 1: and I could have just helped her pick it up. 1104 00:52:14,640 --> 00:52:17,040 Speaker 2: I even said to a mom one time I was 1105 00:52:17,080 --> 00:52:20,040 Speaker 2: traveling to London and like the baby was crying, and 1106 00:52:20,040 --> 00:52:21,680 Speaker 2: I'm like, if you need help, like I will hold 1107 00:52:21,680 --> 00:52:23,239 Speaker 2: your baby. Yeah. I know that's weird, but I'm like, 1108 00:52:23,239 --> 00:52:25,359 Speaker 2: I have two kids, yeah, but I'm just like, just help, 1109 00:52:25,400 --> 00:52:28,160 Speaker 2: be helpful. Yeah yeah, or even just looking at those 1110 00:52:28,160 --> 00:52:31,560 Speaker 2: moms and just saying like you're doing great. I mean, 1111 00:52:31,560 --> 00:52:33,440 Speaker 2: I had a mom, a mom to mom eye contact 1112 00:52:33,520 --> 00:52:35,840 Speaker 2: moment in the airport when we were flying back from Orlando, 1113 00:52:35,920 --> 00:52:38,680 Speaker 2: and this mom we need a support group for moms 1114 00:52:38,719 --> 00:52:40,799 Speaker 2: that have three and four year old boys. But it 1115 00:52:40,880 --> 00:52:44,399 Speaker 2: was like she I heard her saying no, no, no, no, 1116 00:52:44,640 --> 00:52:46,239 Speaker 2: and he was running over to me and I said, 1117 00:52:46,239 --> 00:52:48,879 Speaker 2: we're calling it together, sister, You've got it. You're doing great, 1118 00:52:48,960 --> 00:52:52,000 Speaker 2: and I'm pretty sure like someone didn't like she's she's 1119 00:52:52,040 --> 00:52:55,160 Speaker 2: not like throwing and then just being like, oh, it's 1120 00:52:55,280 --> 00:52:57,399 Speaker 2: leaving there, Like no, I don't think that would happen. 1121 00:52:57,600 --> 00:53:00,120 Speaker 2: I just don't think that's her personality. No, not at all. 1122 00:53:00,120 --> 00:53:01,840 Speaker 2: So that's why it's just so silly to me, Like 1123 00:53:01,960 --> 00:53:02,719 Speaker 2: not silly, but you. 1124 00:53:02,640 --> 00:53:04,840 Speaker 1: Know, like it's silly because everyone feels like they have 1125 00:53:04,880 --> 00:53:06,480 Speaker 1: to pick a side and they have to like it 1126 00:53:06,719 --> 00:53:08,640 Speaker 1: be mery and yeah, mean and. 1127 00:53:08,239 --> 00:53:10,319 Speaker 2: Whatever or judge, and they weren't on the plane calling 1128 00:53:10,320 --> 00:53:12,799 Speaker 2: people entitled and like that doesn't make it. I was like, 1129 00:53:12,800 --> 00:53:14,400 Speaker 2: where's the guy that was in thirteen CE? Can we 1130 00:53:14,440 --> 00:53:17,080 Speaker 2: just talk to him? I'm sure he has she's like 1131 00:53:17,120 --> 00:53:20,239 Speaker 2: going down the aisle throwing popcorn into the you know, 1132 00:53:20,360 --> 00:53:23,600 Speaker 2: like the tone from the that's the thing where sometimes 1133 00:53:23,600 --> 00:53:26,600 Speaker 2: they can be very rude to share time. 1134 00:53:26,600 --> 00:53:29,640 Speaker 1: With a white and I just think it was the 1135 00:53:29,640 --> 00:53:31,520 Speaker 1: tone of what was probably. 1136 00:53:31,120 --> 00:53:34,000 Speaker 2: The I think it's always the tone. It's always the 1137 00:53:34,000 --> 00:53:37,239 Speaker 2: way you say something, yeah, because yeah, sometimes it's just 1138 00:53:37,280 --> 00:53:39,759 Speaker 2: like okay, like oh my gosh, I mean we've had 1139 00:53:39,760 --> 00:53:41,520 Speaker 2: it a few times on our flights where they just 1140 00:53:41,560 --> 00:53:45,000 Speaker 2: get a little crisp person almost got arrested. I'm a 1141 00:53:45,040 --> 00:53:47,799 Speaker 2: bad citizen. I felt like I carried the shame of 1142 00:53:47,840 --> 00:53:52,680 Speaker 2: our flight. But sometimes it's just the tone in which 1143 00:53:52,719 --> 00:53:54,759 Speaker 2: people say things. We're just gonna be like, hey, you mind, 1144 00:53:54,800 --> 00:53:56,600 Speaker 2: here's the bag if you want to, you know, get 1145 00:53:56,640 --> 00:53:59,839 Speaker 2: that on the way out. Just understanding to compassion. We've 1146 00:53:59,880 --> 00:54:02,160 Speaker 2: just and we're missing a huge piece of compassion for 1147 00:54:02,239 --> 00:54:05,719 Speaker 2: each other. I think I love you guys, love you. 1148 00:54:06,440 --> 00:54:07,120 Speaker 2: See you next week. 1149 00:54:07,280 --> 00:54:08,240 Speaker 1: Bye bye bye