1 00:00:00,200 --> 00:00:01,800 Speaker 1: Okay, guys, here are my dates for the High and 2 00:00:01,880 --> 00:00:05,800 Speaker 1: Mighty Tour. In August you can find me in Red Bank, 3 00:00:05,920 --> 00:00:09,920 Speaker 1: New Jersey, Montclair, New Jersey, and Calgary that's Canada. And 4 00:00:10,000 --> 00:00:13,039 Speaker 1: September I will be in Santa Barbara, San Diego, New 5 00:00:13,119 --> 00:00:22,440 Speaker 1: York City, Philly and New Haven, Connecticut. October is Atlanta, Baltimore, Saginaw, Michigan, Pittsburgh, Toronto, Boise, 6 00:00:22,560 --> 00:00:25,959 Speaker 1: Idaho and Spokan. And then in November I'll be in 7 00:00:26,000 --> 00:00:29,280 Speaker 1: San Francisco. I'm coming to Salt Lake City, Austin, Houston, 8 00:00:29,400 --> 00:00:32,760 Speaker 1: Dallas Babies, I'll be there. And then in December I 9 00:00:32,760 --> 00:00:36,239 Speaker 1: am closing out my tour in Denver and Vancouver. So 10 00:00:36,440 --> 00:00:39,320 Speaker 1: get your tickets at Chelseahandler dot com for the High 11 00:00:39,400 --> 00:00:44,080 Speaker 1: and Mighty Tour. Hi Catherine, Hi Chelsea. 12 00:00:44,120 --> 00:00:45,720 Speaker 2: Who are you traveling with right now? 13 00:00:46,000 --> 00:00:47,640 Speaker 1: I am now by myself. 14 00:00:47,840 --> 00:00:48,600 Speaker 3: Oh okay. 15 00:00:48,720 --> 00:00:52,120 Speaker 4: I am in Spanish school. I am going to Spanish 16 00:00:52,120 --> 00:00:55,440 Speaker 4: school from nine to two pm every day in a 17 00:00:55,520 --> 00:00:59,720 Speaker 4: Spanish city somewhere near you, somewhere near Spain. 18 00:01:06,760 --> 00:01:08,720 Speaker 3: You're gonna be fluid when you come back. It's gonna 19 00:01:08,720 --> 00:01:09,560 Speaker 3: be great. 20 00:01:10,120 --> 00:01:12,839 Speaker 4: Hopefully we'll see what happens we'll see how many days 21 00:01:12,840 --> 00:01:14,039 Speaker 4: of school I actually get to. 22 00:01:14,200 --> 00:01:18,560 Speaker 1: But I'm on day three, so school from nine to two. 23 00:01:18,880 --> 00:01:22,800 Speaker 4: And then there's cultural activity activity da DAEs that I 24 00:01:22,840 --> 00:01:25,080 Speaker 4: am opting out of because I need a nightlife. 25 00:01:25,640 --> 00:01:27,920 Speaker 1: But I in school from nine to two is all 26 00:01:27,959 --> 00:01:28,640 Speaker 1: I need? Really? 27 00:01:29,080 --> 00:01:31,160 Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean I think your your nightlife is going 28 00:01:31,200 --> 00:01:32,759 Speaker 2: to be your cultural activity Dades. 29 00:01:32,920 --> 00:01:37,880 Speaker 5: Yes, exactly, that's me experiencing culture is going out excellent. Well, 30 00:01:37,920 --> 00:01:39,800 Speaker 5: our guest today is a very special guest because she's 31 00:01:39,840 --> 00:01:43,800 Speaker 5: launching her very own podcast under the Dear Chelsea podcast network, 32 00:01:44,319 --> 00:01:46,600 Speaker 5: and this is going to give you a slice of 33 00:01:46,720 --> 00:01:48,880 Speaker 5: what you can listen to when you tune into her 34 00:01:48,960 --> 00:01:52,520 Speaker 5: podcast every week. Her new podcast is called You're the 35 00:01:52,600 --> 00:01:57,720 Speaker 5: Problem with Yaminika Saunders, and after listening to this, you'll 36 00:01:57,720 --> 00:02:01,680 Speaker 5: also understand that she is the problem and she's my 37 00:02:01,800 --> 00:02:07,160 Speaker 5: problem and everyone's problem. So that title alone invites you 38 00:02:07,400 --> 00:02:08,560 Speaker 5: to laugh. 39 00:02:09,000 --> 00:02:11,400 Speaker 2: And she gave great advice. Actually on this episode, I 40 00:02:11,480 --> 00:02:13,320 Speaker 2: was I was very impressed with her. 41 00:02:13,400 --> 00:02:14,440 Speaker 1: She is good at advice. 42 00:02:14,560 --> 00:02:17,960 Speaker 5: She's terrible at taking it, but she's good at giving it. 43 00:02:18,080 --> 00:02:19,440 Speaker 3: How necessary is this air? 44 00:02:19,800 --> 00:02:23,400 Speaker 1: Excuse me? Excuse me? How sweaty don't even let me. 45 00:02:23,440 --> 00:02:25,200 Speaker 1: First of all, I want to talk to you, okay 46 00:02:25,880 --> 00:02:28,480 Speaker 1: before we're shooting this podcast. This is dear Chelsea, this 47 00:02:28,520 --> 00:02:31,120 Speaker 1: is Y'allminika Saunders. If you're not familiar with her, you 48 00:02:31,160 --> 00:02:33,440 Speaker 1: will be by the end of this episode. 49 00:02:34,120 --> 00:02:36,040 Speaker 3: We've had clips go viral with you. 50 00:02:36,240 --> 00:02:39,520 Speaker 1: Okay, anyway, why don't you how necessary is this air? 51 00:02:40,800 --> 00:02:44,120 Speaker 1: How necessary? Is all the bullshit that you get up to? 52 00:02:44,480 --> 00:02:47,480 Speaker 1: You are disruptive. She's been staying at my house for 53 00:02:47,720 --> 00:02:51,120 Speaker 1: a week. Here we go for Thelix Joe Comedy Festival. 54 00:02:51,919 --> 00:02:55,000 Speaker 1: She every she has nothing, she brought nothing with her. 55 00:02:55,080 --> 00:02:57,880 Speaker 1: We've been on the road. Every day is brand new 56 00:02:57,880 --> 00:03:00,919 Speaker 1: for her. Every day you go into her bedroom, she's 57 00:03:00,960 --> 00:03:05,560 Speaker 1: in the bunk room. Megan was also staying here. Megan Gaily, by. 58 00:03:05,400 --> 00:03:08,000 Speaker 3: The way, because she goes through this nonsense. 59 00:03:07,560 --> 00:03:10,280 Speaker 1: Okay, every day in the bunk room where she's staying. 60 00:03:10,720 --> 00:03:14,240 Speaker 1: She it looks like a fucking pop up CVS. She 61 00:03:14,480 --> 00:03:17,040 Speaker 1: has to go to CBS. She goes to CVS three 62 00:03:17,040 --> 00:03:17,560 Speaker 1: times a day. 63 00:03:17,600 --> 00:03:18,120 Speaker 3: I'm addicted. 64 00:03:18,200 --> 00:03:21,079 Speaker 1: She buys all the new It's like she's starting over. 65 00:03:21,160 --> 00:03:24,400 Speaker 1: Each day. She doesn't have any of her supplies. She 66 00:03:24,480 --> 00:03:27,200 Speaker 1: has to get her hair stuff, her face stuff, her sneaker. 67 00:03:27,280 --> 00:03:30,240 Speaker 1: She buys clothes at CVS. Then she went to Marshalls. 68 00:03:30,480 --> 00:03:32,880 Speaker 1: Then she goes to Marshalls twice a week. Yeah, I 69 00:03:32,919 --> 00:03:36,200 Speaker 1: introduced her with the Marshals trend. I introduced her. I 70 00:03:36,240 --> 00:03:39,080 Speaker 1: introduced her to Airwan. So I said, here's where the 71 00:03:39,080 --> 00:03:41,120 Speaker 1: white people go shopping in Santa Monica. 72 00:03:41,200 --> 00:03:41,680 Speaker 3: Come Buck. 73 00:03:42,000 --> 00:03:43,360 Speaker 1: And I was like, if you have you ever had 74 00:03:43,400 --> 00:03:47,800 Speaker 1: a thirteen dollars smoothie? And this bitch goes every morning 75 00:03:47,800 --> 00:03:50,160 Speaker 1: now to Airwan, spends eighty dollars at Airwan. 76 00:03:50,280 --> 00:03:53,119 Speaker 3: I can't help that. Yeah, No, I got this from 77 00:03:53,120 --> 00:03:55,480 Speaker 3: this who's nicky. That's me. 78 00:03:55,760 --> 00:03:58,960 Speaker 6: I don't because he got to learn how to spell yaminika. 79 00:03:58,960 --> 00:04:00,280 Speaker 6: They didn't even teach me how to spell my name 80 00:04:00,360 --> 00:04:01,960 Speaker 6: until I was in the third grade. Well, the problem 81 00:04:02,040 --> 00:04:04,000 Speaker 6: I'm supposed to lest some brand new lady that just 82 00:04:04,080 --> 00:04:07,080 Speaker 6: met me learn the problem with spelling your name. We're 83 00:04:07,080 --> 00:04:09,800 Speaker 6: about to launch a podcast. This is an announcement, you 84 00:04:09,840 --> 00:04:13,280 Speaker 6: guys to our audience. Dear Chelsea Network is now a network. 85 00:04:13,320 --> 00:04:15,040 Speaker 6: And yes, I hold my breast when I say that. 86 00:04:15,800 --> 00:04:19,400 Speaker 1: I guess my first podcast that I'm producing beyond my 87 00:04:19,480 --> 00:04:20,320 Speaker 1: own is. 88 00:04:21,080 --> 00:04:24,400 Speaker 3: You're the problem with Yaminika. But you're the fucking problem, 89 00:04:24,400 --> 00:04:27,719 Speaker 3: not the problem. You're the problem. Listen. I am a 90 00:04:27,760 --> 00:04:29,360 Speaker 3: part of the collective of the problem. 91 00:04:29,400 --> 00:04:31,280 Speaker 6: So when I say you're the problem, I'm also saying 92 00:04:31,279 --> 00:04:33,839 Speaker 6: that to myself a lot. I'm glad you're saying that 93 00:04:34,320 --> 00:04:35,920 Speaker 6: we need to talk about and we have to do 94 00:04:36,000 --> 00:04:38,640 Speaker 6: the fact that you've bought three rotisserie chickens in three 95 00:04:38,720 --> 00:04:44,120 Speaker 6: days and haven't even finished them, that they were delicious 96 00:04:44,160 --> 00:04:45,600 Speaker 6: every day she never finished. 97 00:04:47,480 --> 00:04:50,120 Speaker 1: This was twenty two dollars one juice. It's the Hanley. 98 00:04:50,160 --> 00:04:50,800 Speaker 1: What are you doing? 99 00:04:50,960 --> 00:04:51,360 Speaker 3: I don't know. 100 00:04:52,839 --> 00:04:54,880 Speaker 1: We should get a discout from Haley. I'll DM her. 101 00:04:55,000 --> 00:04:57,680 Speaker 3: No, don't listen. Is this her? Haley? Let me tell 102 00:04:57,680 --> 00:04:58,400 Speaker 3: you something, baby, I. 103 00:04:58,440 --> 00:05:00,320 Speaker 1: Have to smoke a joint for this episode because I 104 00:05:00,320 --> 00:05:02,320 Speaker 1: can't deal with her. Can I tell she drives me 105 00:05:02,400 --> 00:05:03,560 Speaker 1: to drink and smoke. 106 00:05:03,720 --> 00:05:06,000 Speaker 6: Yeah, well you're drinking and smoke it anyway. So what 107 00:05:06,000 --> 00:05:08,279 Speaker 6: were you doing all the damn years before you met me? 108 00:05:08,320 --> 00:05:10,680 Speaker 1: I was drinking and smoking for a different Now you're 109 00:05:10,760 --> 00:05:12,159 Speaker 1: the reason I'm drinking and smoking. 110 00:05:12,360 --> 00:05:12,640 Speaker 7: Haley. 111 00:05:12,760 --> 00:05:16,400 Speaker 6: This smoothie here, it's the thing I drink every morning 112 00:05:16,400 --> 00:05:17,920 Speaker 6: and keep my bowls regular. 113 00:05:18,080 --> 00:05:21,960 Speaker 3: I suck this down and it is muddy tunnel. Do 114 00:05:22,000 --> 00:05:24,360 Speaker 3: you hear me? That's why they's so damn thin. 115 00:05:24,880 --> 00:05:27,520 Speaker 6: When you spend twenty two dollars for a smoothie, you 116 00:05:27,560 --> 00:05:29,479 Speaker 6: don't have money to eat for the rest of the day. 117 00:05:30,320 --> 00:05:31,680 Speaker 3: That's it. That's right. 118 00:05:32,040 --> 00:05:33,760 Speaker 8: Basically, Rachel Ray back in the day. 119 00:05:33,600 --> 00:05:35,760 Speaker 1: She goes, she buys a rotissery chicken every day, and 120 00:05:35,800 --> 00:05:37,320 Speaker 1: then she goes, oh, I got you all chicken. No 121 00:05:37,360 --> 00:05:39,160 Speaker 1: one wants it. No one wants the chicken you bought 122 00:05:39,400 --> 00:05:41,640 Speaker 1: chicken noodle suit the other day. It's still in the fridge, 123 00:05:41,640 --> 00:05:44,480 Speaker 1: a huge pint of it. There's you haven't touched it. 124 00:05:44,520 --> 00:05:46,479 Speaker 1: You don't eat any of the stuff that you buy, 125 00:05:47,120 --> 00:05:48,920 Speaker 1: so what are you doing with it? 126 00:05:48,960 --> 00:05:51,560 Speaker 3: Is this like that we might have a problem. 127 00:05:52,200 --> 00:05:56,200 Speaker 6: I get excited about purchases and things looking like, oh, 128 00:05:56,240 --> 00:05:58,480 Speaker 6: this is gonna look cute in the refrigerator. So yeah, 129 00:05:58,800 --> 00:06:02,560 Speaker 6: a sixteen dollars soup makes no sense, but it looks 130 00:06:02,600 --> 00:06:04,560 Speaker 6: cute and refrigerator. And that's what she's not gonna tell you. 131 00:06:04,800 --> 00:06:07,360 Speaker 6: It looks good in refrigerator. But also have her tell 132 00:06:07,400 --> 00:06:09,880 Speaker 6: you this. The reason why I haven't eaten it yet 133 00:06:09,960 --> 00:06:12,680 Speaker 6: is because this bitch also has one in there, So 134 00:06:12,680 --> 00:06:13,760 Speaker 6: why would I open mine up. 135 00:06:13,720 --> 00:06:15,040 Speaker 3: If you don't have yours open yet? 136 00:06:15,080 --> 00:06:15,800 Speaker 1: What my chicken? 137 00:06:15,920 --> 00:06:17,040 Speaker 3: You have a chicken noodle soup? 138 00:06:18,160 --> 00:06:20,720 Speaker 1: Chicken nood you do I have? I never even ordered that. 139 00:06:20,800 --> 00:06:23,840 Speaker 1: I never get Do you want to go to probably yours? 140 00:06:23,880 --> 00:06:24,480 Speaker 1: You dumbass? 141 00:06:24,600 --> 00:06:24,720 Speaker 9: Not? 142 00:06:24,800 --> 00:06:27,240 Speaker 1: You probably got it and you forgot that you bought it. 143 00:06:27,279 --> 00:06:33,159 Speaker 1: Like everything else, every she waits you, I would you, though, 144 00:06:33,279 --> 00:06:33,919 Speaker 1: I would you? 145 00:06:34,160 --> 00:06:34,480 Speaker 7: I mean. 146 00:06:36,680 --> 00:06:38,159 Speaker 3: Chicken noodle soup twice okay. 147 00:06:38,240 --> 00:06:40,039 Speaker 1: The other day she goes, oh, we can break down 148 00:06:40,080 --> 00:06:42,640 Speaker 1: the bones from the rotisserie chicken. I can make a 149 00:06:42,760 --> 00:06:47,080 Speaker 1: nice Yeah, I can make anybody, But when is that 150 00:06:47,120 --> 00:06:50,400 Speaker 1: gonna happen? Y No one's making any fucking soup with 151 00:06:50,440 --> 00:06:53,279 Speaker 1: some bones. We're not doing that at any point during 152 00:06:53,320 --> 00:06:56,080 Speaker 1: your stay here. So that the fantasy that you're living 153 00:06:56,080 --> 00:06:58,560 Speaker 1: in about us making bone broth or whatever the fuck 154 00:06:58,600 --> 00:07:01,159 Speaker 1: you're talking about is so stupid. 155 00:07:00,920 --> 00:07:03,200 Speaker 3: Because you want to do it with me. 156 00:07:03,360 --> 00:07:06,480 Speaker 1: The way I see you operate is on another level. 157 00:07:06,600 --> 00:07:08,960 Speaker 1: Like I thought I knew her having her in my 158 00:07:09,040 --> 00:07:10,920 Speaker 1: house in my space, thank you for breaking in my 159 00:07:10,960 --> 00:07:12,080 Speaker 1: house helpfully, Like. 160 00:07:12,080 --> 00:07:13,680 Speaker 6: I mean, I know, I've had an amazing time here 161 00:07:13,880 --> 00:07:17,040 Speaker 6: it's been really nice having it's the most fun room. 162 00:07:17,280 --> 00:07:19,200 Speaker 6: Megan and I had such an amazing time. 163 00:07:19,520 --> 00:07:21,880 Speaker 3: There's four bunk beds. When I first heard that, I 164 00:07:21,960 --> 00:07:24,040 Speaker 3: was like, this is some stupid ship. 165 00:07:24,400 --> 00:07:26,960 Speaker 1: And then I was like a women's presses. 166 00:07:27,240 --> 00:07:29,960 Speaker 3: No, it's like everybody has their own little compartment. 167 00:07:30,360 --> 00:07:30,800 Speaker 8: Yeah. 168 00:07:31,320 --> 00:07:34,920 Speaker 6: Like it was so great, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, like 169 00:07:35,080 --> 00:07:36,080 Speaker 6: comedy really good. 170 00:07:36,200 --> 00:07:38,280 Speaker 3: I love it. Yeah, and thank you for letting me 171 00:07:38,320 --> 00:07:38,880 Speaker 3: come in. Listen. 172 00:07:39,520 --> 00:07:42,360 Speaker 1: Get you on the right concealer though your facial concealer. Okay, 173 00:07:42,480 --> 00:07:44,200 Speaker 1: let me just solve the problem with you buying new 174 00:07:44,280 --> 00:07:47,119 Speaker 1: concealer everywhere you go. You're not getting the right color 175 00:07:47,160 --> 00:07:47,720 Speaker 1: for your skals. 176 00:07:47,760 --> 00:07:49,800 Speaker 6: Okay, so I lost my makeup bag in a couple 177 00:07:49,800 --> 00:07:50,400 Speaker 6: of places. 178 00:07:50,600 --> 00:07:51,800 Speaker 3: Here's the thing about Chelsea. 179 00:07:52,120 --> 00:07:54,920 Speaker 6: She doesn't understand why I don't have my shit together, 180 00:07:54,960 --> 00:07:57,720 Speaker 6: but then she got six thousand people keeping her shit together. 181 00:07:58,200 --> 00:08:02,840 Speaker 1: I'm by the way, man Ban, by the way, you 182 00:08:03,120 --> 00:08:05,640 Speaker 1: have infected all of the people that work with me 183 00:08:06,120 --> 00:08:09,080 Speaker 1: and for me, because they're all working for fucking you two. Now, 184 00:08:09,400 --> 00:08:11,280 Speaker 1: try to get your shit together. You don't know when 185 00:08:11,320 --> 00:08:13,360 Speaker 1: we're going on tour. You're like, oh, you're going to 186 00:08:13,400 --> 00:08:15,720 Speaker 1: Medesto I'm gonna rent a car. Why would you rent 187 00:08:15,760 --> 00:08:16,800 Speaker 1: a car when we have a car? 188 00:08:18,640 --> 00:08:20,680 Speaker 6: No, no, no, ladies and gentlemen, believe it or not, 189 00:08:21,080 --> 00:08:24,440 Speaker 6: you're the problem with Yaminika is something that I wanted 190 00:08:24,440 --> 00:08:24,680 Speaker 6: to do. 191 00:08:24,800 --> 00:08:26,000 Speaker 3: Chelsea also wanted to do. 192 00:08:26,240 --> 00:08:28,920 Speaker 6: No matter how she sits here and talks crazy about me, 193 00:08:29,200 --> 00:08:31,120 Speaker 6: the woman loves me down to the core, and she 194 00:08:31,120 --> 00:08:32,880 Speaker 6: wouldn't let me be on her fucking network if she 195 00:08:32,920 --> 00:08:34,679 Speaker 6: really thought I was this dumb and irresponsible. 196 00:08:35,480 --> 00:08:35,880 Speaker 10: You're dumb. 197 00:08:35,920 --> 00:08:39,160 Speaker 6: I've never said idiot. Dumb, stupid is like what you know, 198 00:08:39,480 --> 00:08:41,760 Speaker 6: what do we play taboo? But what I'm saying to 199 00:08:41,800 --> 00:08:44,960 Speaker 6: you is we'd like it's such like what we have 200 00:08:45,120 --> 00:08:49,120 Speaker 6: going on here is such a fantastic moment and time. 201 00:08:49,200 --> 00:08:51,560 Speaker 6: I'm so excited to be on the network. I just 202 00:08:51,600 --> 00:08:55,079 Speaker 6: think it is just so I'm just I can't wait. 203 00:08:55,240 --> 00:08:56,080 Speaker 6: And I think you. 204 00:08:56,400 --> 00:08:59,240 Speaker 1: Talk about on your show. I mean, listener. First of all, 205 00:08:59,280 --> 00:09:01,960 Speaker 1: we have a great something something almost. 206 00:09:01,679 --> 00:09:04,320 Speaker 3: Like a sisterhood, because we like to each other. 207 00:09:05,000 --> 00:09:09,599 Speaker 1: You're annoying, but you're annoying, okay, but well, anyway, we 208 00:09:09,760 --> 00:09:11,600 Speaker 1: have a good time together most of the time. 209 00:09:12,440 --> 00:09:15,000 Speaker 3: And I do think that you last night we were 210 00:09:15,000 --> 00:09:15,679 Speaker 3: at this party. 211 00:09:16,160 --> 00:09:21,760 Speaker 6: We was slow grinding awful, and people were walking past 212 00:09:21,880 --> 00:09:25,840 Speaker 6: like like people are intrigued by our love but also 213 00:09:26,040 --> 00:09:29,319 Speaker 6: like skeptical, but then they're also like also into it. 214 00:09:29,679 --> 00:09:32,160 Speaker 6: I've had so many male comics text me and be like, 215 00:09:32,520 --> 00:09:34,880 Speaker 6: can you put more videos up of you and Chelsea 216 00:09:35,000 --> 00:09:35,880 Speaker 6: wrestling each other? 217 00:09:36,679 --> 00:09:38,040 Speaker 3: Do you know when we get together? 218 00:09:38,160 --> 00:09:40,240 Speaker 1: I was walking around the party and I like was 219 00:09:40,320 --> 00:09:42,640 Speaker 1: so stoned that I forgot where you guys were, and 220 00:09:42,720 --> 00:09:44,880 Speaker 1: I kept trying to find that outside area where we 221 00:09:45,000 --> 00:09:47,000 Speaker 1: found at the beginning of the night. We were like, 222 00:09:47,280 --> 00:09:48,959 Speaker 1: we found a place where you could smoke and sit 223 00:09:49,040 --> 00:09:51,839 Speaker 1: outside and dance, and somehow I just got lost and 224 00:09:51,880 --> 00:09:54,480 Speaker 1: I kept circling the same group of people and it 225 00:09:54,640 --> 00:09:57,000 Speaker 1: was so annoying, and I was like, how do I 226 00:09:57,200 --> 00:09:57,880 Speaker 1: find them? 227 00:09:58,280 --> 00:10:00,839 Speaker 3: And then what happened, Like the Black Angel, didn't I 228 00:10:00,880 --> 00:10:02,400 Speaker 3: come up behind you and go where you've been? 229 00:10:02,480 --> 00:10:02,760 Speaker 7: Baby? 230 00:10:03,800 --> 00:10:09,400 Speaker 3: And then yeah, that was you got bitch, that was 231 00:10:09,520 --> 00:10:11,520 Speaker 3: me you would and we took that picture and ride 232 00:10:11,559 --> 00:10:12,360 Speaker 3: her away. 233 00:10:12,480 --> 00:10:15,199 Speaker 6: Yeah, absolutely, I knew you were somewhere in need of 234 00:10:15,280 --> 00:10:17,240 Speaker 6: mind say that's really. 235 00:10:17,280 --> 00:10:20,760 Speaker 8: You know, I mean, somebody that incredible album Chelsea. 236 00:10:20,600 --> 00:10:22,800 Speaker 6: I get on Chelsea's nerves. I understand for what she's 237 00:10:22,840 --> 00:10:24,120 Speaker 6: a Pisces, I'm a Scorpio. 238 00:10:24,200 --> 00:10:24,960 Speaker 3: Where she she. 239 00:10:25,040 --> 00:10:27,959 Speaker 1: Says this about forty seven types every days. 240 00:10:28,040 --> 00:10:30,960 Speaker 6: If anything, it's just a lot because as a scorpio 241 00:10:31,040 --> 00:10:32,760 Speaker 6: the way we don't want to be bothered with people. 242 00:10:32,880 --> 00:10:36,600 Speaker 1: But as a Scorpio, you you default your scorpionism all 243 00:10:36,679 --> 00:10:40,880 Speaker 1: day long, every because whatever she does, that's fucked up. 244 00:10:40,880 --> 00:10:42,240 Speaker 1: I'll be like, that's fucked up. She's like, I'm a 245 00:10:42,240 --> 00:10:44,880 Speaker 1: Scorpio and she just defaults to that, and I don't, like, 246 00:10:46,080 --> 00:10:49,560 Speaker 1: you can't do that. Let me, you're working around going 247 00:10:49,600 --> 00:10:50,760 Speaker 1: I'm a Pisces, deal with it. 248 00:10:51,000 --> 00:10:53,720 Speaker 6: She literally did a joke in the rows, I'm a Pisces, 249 00:10:54,280 --> 00:10:57,720 Speaker 6: Pete Davis is a Scorpio and Jeff has cancer. 250 00:10:59,880 --> 00:11:02,040 Speaker 1: I was so good. 251 00:11:04,400 --> 00:11:06,319 Speaker 3: So yeah, I mean we all defer to it. 252 00:11:06,559 --> 00:11:08,880 Speaker 6: But what I the reason why I reference it is 253 00:11:08,960 --> 00:11:12,960 Speaker 6: because for me, I think people are shocked to see 254 00:11:13,960 --> 00:11:15,080 Speaker 6: my relationship with her. 255 00:11:15,160 --> 00:11:16,439 Speaker 3: I have these relationships. 256 00:11:16,480 --> 00:11:19,000 Speaker 6: There's people in my life that I'm really really close 257 00:11:19,040 --> 00:11:20,840 Speaker 6: to and I have these relations too, and they don't 258 00:11:20,840 --> 00:11:23,120 Speaker 6: get to see it on a larger scale. But for me, 259 00:11:23,360 --> 00:11:26,079 Speaker 6: I'm always guarded, you know, just as a person. And 260 00:11:26,200 --> 00:11:29,360 Speaker 6: I know that I'm so sensitive that once I get 261 00:11:29,400 --> 00:11:32,920 Speaker 6: into a friendship with somebody, I start sharing my feelings, 262 00:11:33,080 --> 00:11:35,719 Speaker 6: my everything, and so I'm very vulnerable with that. But 263 00:11:36,240 --> 00:11:39,199 Speaker 6: she is, you know, she really lets me in and 264 00:11:39,280 --> 00:11:41,839 Speaker 6: I just love pinching her. I love pinching her little tush. 265 00:11:42,400 --> 00:11:45,720 Speaker 6: I love pinching her cheeks. I love pinching her arms, 266 00:11:46,080 --> 00:11:48,120 Speaker 6: just like all my friends. It's not Chelsea them doing 267 00:11:48,160 --> 00:11:50,920 Speaker 6: it's That's what my friendship is like. It's very loving, 268 00:11:51,040 --> 00:11:54,720 Speaker 6: it's very touchy, and it's very like extra. 269 00:11:55,720 --> 00:11:59,000 Speaker 1: It's a burden for me. It's a big burden. 270 00:11:59,360 --> 00:12:01,920 Speaker 3: It's not loves it. Don't listen to her? 271 00:12:06,280 --> 00:12:09,559 Speaker 2: Okay, So how do you keep winding up in Chelsea's bed? 272 00:12:09,679 --> 00:12:11,520 Speaker 2: That's that's what I want to know, because apparently it's 273 00:12:11,520 --> 00:12:12,120 Speaker 2: having a bunch of. 274 00:12:12,120 --> 00:12:14,520 Speaker 1: Times Yamka, what's your version of that story? 275 00:12:14,600 --> 00:12:18,120 Speaker 6: I love completely naked and I have seen her completely naked, 276 00:12:18,200 --> 00:12:22,520 Speaker 6: So what the so have happened? But what I'm saying 277 00:12:22,640 --> 00:12:25,959 Speaker 6: is no, what's the bed of who cares? She looks, 278 00:12:26,160 --> 00:12:28,600 Speaker 6: she's thin, She's not even taking up all this bed. 279 00:12:28,760 --> 00:12:31,199 Speaker 6: She doesn't need it, So why wouldn't I be in there? 280 00:12:32,040 --> 00:12:33,160 Speaker 6: I got my own space. 281 00:12:33,240 --> 00:12:35,440 Speaker 3: We're like two miles away from each other, and these 282 00:12:35,520 --> 00:12:38,720 Speaker 3: humung is ass beds that she's always in. This bitch 283 00:12:38,840 --> 00:12:40,439 Speaker 3: loves a whole last time. 284 00:12:40,360 --> 00:12:43,439 Speaker 1: We were in a bead like maybe I told this story. 285 00:12:43,480 --> 00:12:45,000 Speaker 1: I don't know. I think I said it to you 286 00:12:45,080 --> 00:12:48,160 Speaker 1: once we were recording that I we had her, they 287 00:12:48,200 --> 00:12:50,160 Speaker 1: had her come up. I don't know why she's in 288 00:12:50,240 --> 00:12:52,200 Speaker 1: my room in the first place. Is a mystery, Okay, 289 00:12:52,400 --> 00:12:54,480 Speaker 1: I mean she I did it once and then she's 290 00:12:54,559 --> 00:12:56,760 Speaker 1: like every weekend she's like, so maybe on Thursday, I'll 291 00:12:56,800 --> 00:12:58,719 Speaker 1: spend the night with you, like, and I'll get a 292 00:12:58,760 --> 00:13:00,600 Speaker 1: place the other two nights. But you never know she's 293 00:13:00,640 --> 00:13:02,199 Speaker 1: gonna get a place or she's not gonna get a 294 00:13:02,200 --> 00:13:03,000 Speaker 1: place in the right city. 295 00:13:03,320 --> 00:13:04,560 Speaker 3: We don't know what I do get a place. 296 00:13:04,600 --> 00:13:06,280 Speaker 6: They get an attitude about it because I like these 297 00:13:06,320 --> 00:13:09,959 Speaker 6: my Marriott points, my bonvoy Marriott points. I'm also gonna 298 00:13:09,960 --> 00:13:12,720 Speaker 6: get a discount on bookings dot Com. I'm gonna roll 299 00:13:12,840 --> 00:13:13,320 Speaker 6: that over. 300 00:13:13,760 --> 00:13:16,760 Speaker 1: I mean, it's expensive, but you're not getting when you're 301 00:13:16,800 --> 00:13:19,560 Speaker 1: making the reservation in the wrong city for the wrong Yeah. 302 00:13:19,800 --> 00:13:21,600 Speaker 6: I did book the wrong hotel for the wrong day, 303 00:13:21,640 --> 00:13:24,040 Speaker 6: for the wrong year. I mean, I don't know I'm 304 00:13:24,120 --> 00:13:25,840 Speaker 6: doing what I but I had a place to stay, 305 00:13:25,920 --> 00:13:27,400 Speaker 6: did not Yeah in my bed? 306 00:13:27,600 --> 00:13:27,800 Speaker 4: Yeah? 307 00:13:27,840 --> 00:13:29,160 Speaker 3: Well okay, okay. 308 00:13:29,720 --> 00:13:35,400 Speaker 1: How many times she has all her makeup everywhere? She 309 00:13:35,400 --> 00:13:37,360 Speaker 1: doesn't even remember her makeup, so it looks like I 310 00:13:37,480 --> 00:13:38,520 Speaker 1: did black face and went to s. 311 00:13:38,840 --> 00:13:40,640 Speaker 6: I can't help it that you keep your makeup on 312 00:13:40,760 --> 00:13:42,680 Speaker 6: and it's the same color as the damn sheets. 313 00:13:42,720 --> 00:13:52,880 Speaker 3: Bitch, chocolate cheese. She do, Like sometimes I wonder if 314 00:13:52,880 --> 00:13:54,400 Speaker 3: people come in and look at the sheets after you 315 00:13:54,520 --> 00:13:59,319 Speaker 3: leave it, but like, what the fuck my entire face 316 00:13:59,400 --> 00:14:00,840 Speaker 3: is on it? But I listen. 317 00:14:00,920 --> 00:14:03,000 Speaker 6: It's those things too, because like I've been on the 318 00:14:03,120 --> 00:14:06,560 Speaker 6: road with so many people and it's like, Chelsea's so fun. 319 00:14:06,640 --> 00:14:09,040 Speaker 6: One of the favorite, my favorite things about her is 320 00:14:09,160 --> 00:14:11,720 Speaker 6: like when I first started doing the road with her, 321 00:14:12,320 --> 00:14:15,160 Speaker 6: I would stay in my place, you know, my green room, 322 00:14:15,200 --> 00:14:16,959 Speaker 6: which I thought was great because sometimes you don't even 323 00:14:16,960 --> 00:14:19,040 Speaker 6: get a green room as an opener. And I would 324 00:14:19,080 --> 00:14:20,600 Speaker 6: be in my green room and she'd be with hers. 325 00:14:20,680 --> 00:14:22,560 Speaker 6: And then one time she came in and she was like, 326 00:14:22,640 --> 00:14:25,440 Speaker 6: how come you're like not it, you didn't come in here, Like, 327 00:14:25,480 --> 00:14:26,560 Speaker 6: how come you don't come in with me? And I 328 00:14:26,640 --> 00:14:27,920 Speaker 6: was like, I'm trying to give your space and she 329 00:14:28,040 --> 00:14:29,760 Speaker 6: was like I don't want that. She was like, come 330 00:14:29,840 --> 00:14:32,080 Speaker 6: in there. And then we went in there and were 331 00:14:32,240 --> 00:14:34,800 Speaker 6: you know, Molly was there. We had an amazing time 332 00:14:35,320 --> 00:14:37,680 Speaker 6: and it was just fun like ever since then. It 333 00:14:37,840 --> 00:14:40,960 Speaker 6: was like such a connection and I was thinking to myself, like, well, 334 00:14:41,040 --> 00:14:43,320 Speaker 6: I can't go wait to get back and kick it 335 00:14:43,360 --> 00:14:44,560 Speaker 6: with her, because sometimes you go on. 336 00:14:44,560 --> 00:14:46,560 Speaker 3: The road, it's the truth. Sometimes you get depressed. 337 00:14:46,560 --> 00:14:47,680 Speaker 6: You're like, man, I don't want to be around this 338 00:14:47,720 --> 00:14:49,760 Speaker 6: person or treat me like shit. They gonna make me 339 00:14:49,840 --> 00:14:52,160 Speaker 6: feel whatever. She brings me on as her special guests. 340 00:14:52,480 --> 00:14:56,000 Speaker 6: She's so welcoming and loving. Her audiences are so receptive 341 00:14:56,080 --> 00:14:59,160 Speaker 6: and even though she comes out greets everybody, that's the 342 00:14:59,240 --> 00:15:01,840 Speaker 6: kind of spirit have. So it's like it just makes 343 00:15:01,920 --> 00:15:04,760 Speaker 6: everything seeing you feel seen, you feel loved. 344 00:15:05,080 --> 00:15:06,840 Speaker 3: And that's what she did for me, so like I'll 345 00:15:06,920 --> 00:15:08,280 Speaker 3: never forget that. 346 00:15:08,800 --> 00:15:13,360 Speaker 1: You know, yeah that is real sweet. But be able 347 00:15:13,400 --> 00:15:15,560 Speaker 1: to yell at you for at least six more hours. 348 00:15:15,720 --> 00:15:17,520 Speaker 1: You'll find what time is your flight tonight? 349 00:15:17,880 --> 00:15:18,160 Speaker 3: Nine? 350 00:15:27,280 --> 00:15:29,040 Speaker 1: She'll be like, will you drive me to the airport? 351 00:15:29,160 --> 00:15:32,240 Speaker 1: Don't you think? She'll suggest She'll suggest things that are 352 00:15:32,360 --> 00:15:35,320 Speaker 1: like great for her that no consideration of how it 353 00:15:35,360 --> 00:15:36,160 Speaker 1: would make me feel. 354 00:15:36,240 --> 00:15:37,640 Speaker 2: Also, no one wants to drive anyone. 355 00:15:39,760 --> 00:15:42,360 Speaker 6: I hate having people drive. Like poor Carlos, he has 356 00:15:42,440 --> 00:15:44,840 Speaker 6: to deal with mine. I have a phobia of driving. 357 00:15:44,880 --> 00:15:46,160 Speaker 3: This has been for a long time. One of my 358 00:15:46,200 --> 00:15:47,520 Speaker 3: sisters was killed in a car accident. 359 00:15:47,920 --> 00:15:50,920 Speaker 6: So ever since then, it was always like, you know, 360 00:15:51,120 --> 00:15:53,320 Speaker 6: I'm constantly aware of like, oh, we're doing this. I 361 00:15:53,320 --> 00:15:54,920 Speaker 6: don't want to die. I don't want my father to 362 00:15:55,040 --> 00:15:56,600 Speaker 6: have to go through this trauma again. My family have 363 00:15:56,680 --> 00:15:59,320 Speaker 6: to go through this trauma again. But Chelsea drove me 364 00:15:59,440 --> 00:15:59,920 Speaker 6: the other day. 365 00:16:00,040 --> 00:16:00,760 Speaker 3: He drove me around. 366 00:16:00,960 --> 00:16:03,360 Speaker 6: She's a really great driver, and I felt good. You know, 367 00:16:03,560 --> 00:16:07,400 Speaker 6: she is like surprisingly, she was really great. I was like, wow, 368 00:16:08,600 --> 00:16:10,840 Speaker 6: I didn't trust her at all, but I did. 369 00:16:11,240 --> 00:16:13,600 Speaker 1: Ask you about me. You should go. She's an excellent driver. 370 00:16:14,680 --> 00:16:20,600 Speaker 3: Though I told you that I was yeah, she didn't 371 00:16:20,640 --> 00:16:22,080 Speaker 3: hear anything from me. I had no complain. 372 00:16:22,080 --> 00:16:24,520 Speaker 1: I was like thank you. No one and everyone in 373 00:16:24,600 --> 00:16:26,800 Speaker 1: my family I would disagree with you, but I appreciate 374 00:16:26,840 --> 00:16:28,080 Speaker 1: you recognizing. 375 00:16:28,440 --> 00:16:30,800 Speaker 3: Maybe they think it's scary, but I'm like, she's on 376 00:16:31,000 --> 00:16:31,480 Speaker 3: top of it. 377 00:16:31,680 --> 00:16:34,800 Speaker 6: Part of driving that people don't have it's people are 378 00:16:34,840 --> 00:16:36,840 Speaker 6: doing a thousand things that are not paying attention and 379 00:16:36,880 --> 00:16:38,000 Speaker 6: they're not aware. 380 00:16:37,640 --> 00:16:38,440 Speaker 3: Of the surroundings. 381 00:16:38,560 --> 00:16:41,600 Speaker 6: That's what makes it dangerous. But Chelsea is very aware 382 00:16:41,600 --> 00:16:43,960 Speaker 6: of what's going on. She's a Pisces. Pisces are like that, 383 00:16:44,480 --> 00:16:47,200 Speaker 6: detail orientated and they also don't fuck around. 384 00:16:47,360 --> 00:16:48,000 Speaker 3: So that's why. 385 00:16:48,520 --> 00:16:51,080 Speaker 6: You know, my other friend Andy, who I'm obsessed with, 386 00:16:51,240 --> 00:16:53,600 Speaker 6: he's a Pisces. I've had Pisces in my life. I 387 00:16:53,760 --> 00:16:57,240 Speaker 6: just love Pisces. They get along with Scorpio well, and 388 00:16:57,920 --> 00:16:59,840 Speaker 6: it just feels goods too. 389 00:17:00,480 --> 00:17:00,960 Speaker 9: There you go. 390 00:17:02,680 --> 00:17:03,120 Speaker 8: Any time? 391 00:17:03,600 --> 00:17:08,520 Speaker 3: Yeah, no, there you go. Yeah, well, baby, I was. 392 00:17:08,560 --> 00:17:12,720 Speaker 1: Just thinking about astrology and like how often it comes 393 00:17:12,800 --> 00:17:13,359 Speaker 1: up with it. 394 00:17:13,680 --> 00:17:16,639 Speaker 3: It does come up a lot. Yeah, it started. 395 00:17:16,760 --> 00:17:18,960 Speaker 1: Are you well versed on every sign like this? 396 00:17:19,400 --> 00:17:22,360 Speaker 3: Every time I have sex with a man, I'm. 397 00:17:22,840 --> 00:17:25,600 Speaker 1: I'm the phoner in person because she has fun sex. 398 00:17:27,960 --> 00:17:28,480 Speaker 11: On the road. 399 00:17:28,960 --> 00:17:31,600 Speaker 1: They look at that look right there is First of all, 400 00:17:31,680 --> 00:17:36,240 Speaker 1: she has five personalities. One is Rashonda, the one is Lucy, 401 00:17:36,359 --> 00:17:38,639 Speaker 1: one is Denzel, and then. 402 00:17:39,119 --> 00:17:41,760 Speaker 6: One is don But I told you, I said I 403 00:17:41,800 --> 00:17:45,720 Speaker 6: will not let your white ass called me, So you've. 404 00:17:45,600 --> 00:17:49,520 Speaker 3: Got to find a new name. It'd be Barbara or 405 00:17:49,600 --> 00:17:53,800 Speaker 3: some ship like that, but is the helpful spirit. 406 00:17:54,000 --> 00:17:55,840 Speaker 1: Lucy will come in out of nowhere and all of 407 00:17:55,880 --> 00:17:57,960 Speaker 1: a sudden because she has you know, she has different 408 00:17:58,000 --> 00:18:02,280 Speaker 1: accents she talks in, so she's bored line or something. Yeah, 409 00:18:02,400 --> 00:18:05,920 Speaker 1: borderline five of them. I thought borderline meant too, but 410 00:18:06,080 --> 00:18:09,959 Speaker 1: it's not. That's a slip personality she has like several 411 00:18:10,480 --> 00:18:13,280 Speaker 1: people I do. So it's pretty tricky because she but 412 00:18:13,440 --> 00:18:16,000 Speaker 1: the good thing is is that she can always snap 413 00:18:16,160 --> 00:18:18,960 Speaker 1: back quickly, so it doesn't like, even though it's a 414 00:18:19,280 --> 00:18:22,399 Speaker 1: very a lot of drama. And I'm saying that in 415 00:18:22,520 --> 00:18:25,680 Speaker 1: a patronizing way kind of like, even though it comes 416 00:18:25,720 --> 00:18:27,760 Speaker 1: with a lot of drama, she recovers from the drama, 417 00:18:27,800 --> 00:18:29,639 Speaker 1: so the drama doesn't last. There's no it's not a 418 00:18:29,680 --> 00:18:32,280 Speaker 1: long duration. Yeah, but there's always drama. 419 00:18:33,080 --> 00:18:35,000 Speaker 6: But the thing about it is the thing and I 420 00:18:35,080 --> 00:18:38,879 Speaker 6: think they're learning this. I have to internalize everything so 421 00:18:38,960 --> 00:18:41,400 Speaker 6: I can deal with it. So that's why it doesn't stay. 422 00:18:41,520 --> 00:18:41,800 Speaker 1: It's you. 423 00:18:41,960 --> 00:18:43,639 Speaker 6: If you catch me in the midst of dealing with 424 00:18:43,760 --> 00:18:47,480 Speaker 6: something that's drama, I'm focused and my spirit is on that. 425 00:18:47,600 --> 00:18:49,040 Speaker 6: So you'd be like, oh my god, Yeahma, what's wrong 426 00:18:49,119 --> 00:18:51,800 Speaker 6: with you really just leave me, give me five minutes 427 00:18:51,880 --> 00:18:54,320 Speaker 6: to process this, and by the time you come back 428 00:18:54,359 --> 00:18:56,720 Speaker 6: to me, I'm gonna be fine because my drama is 429 00:18:56,840 --> 00:18:59,760 Speaker 6: never with the people. It's always my environment, and I'm 430 00:18:59,760 --> 00:19:02,080 Speaker 6: trying to clear that up. But I don't if I'm 431 00:19:02,119 --> 00:19:03,720 Speaker 6: not like, if I don't like you, I wouldn't be 432 00:19:03,760 --> 00:19:06,440 Speaker 6: around you. So I always tell people like, if I'm 433 00:19:06,560 --> 00:19:09,199 Speaker 6: gonna be upset, I may have an attitude, I may 434 00:19:09,320 --> 00:19:12,479 Speaker 6: get scared, but it's not directed at you. And I'm 435 00:19:12,520 --> 00:19:14,720 Speaker 6: also trying to fix that for myself so that I 436 00:19:14,760 --> 00:19:18,080 Speaker 6: can come back to you and be Yama again, you know, 437 00:19:18,280 --> 00:19:19,080 Speaker 6: like the funny girl. 438 00:19:19,240 --> 00:19:25,040 Speaker 1: Yeah, and it's really funny watching also not funny, I guess, 439 00:19:25,160 --> 00:19:28,960 Speaker 1: more interesting and like from like our own experiences, Like 440 00:19:29,119 --> 00:19:31,679 Speaker 1: watching how she goes through the world is like ridiculous. 441 00:19:31,720 --> 00:19:34,000 Speaker 1: It's shocking to me. I'm shocked cause she's the type 442 00:19:34,040 --> 00:19:37,399 Speaker 1: B personality, but she do but but she's also like 443 00:19:37,560 --> 00:19:41,200 Speaker 1: her background and her experiences are so different than mine. 444 00:19:41,680 --> 00:19:43,720 Speaker 1: So for us to come together and to be able 445 00:19:43,800 --> 00:19:46,119 Speaker 1: to like share, of course, she wants to sleep in 446 00:19:46,160 --> 00:19:47,800 Speaker 1: my room because she's like, oh, you got your fucking 447 00:19:47,840 --> 00:19:51,119 Speaker 1: shit dialed in, Let's go it's time my shit is 448 00:19:51,240 --> 00:19:53,920 Speaker 1: dialed in because you know, I've had different experiences in 449 00:19:54,040 --> 00:19:56,840 Speaker 1: my life and like, well, you know that that contrast 450 00:19:57,040 --> 00:20:00,119 Speaker 1: is very like fun to learn about, you know, oh, 451 00:20:00,240 --> 00:20:02,000 Speaker 1: like someone's experience that is so different. 452 00:20:02,320 --> 00:20:04,840 Speaker 3: Well for me, like, okay, so my background is. 453 00:20:06,040 --> 00:20:08,640 Speaker 6: In terms of you being Puerto Rican, I was sure. 454 00:20:09,000 --> 00:20:11,560 Speaker 6: I've always been isolated as a person. I mean, I 455 00:20:11,680 --> 00:20:15,680 Speaker 6: have three beautiful half sisters. We have different mothers. One 456 00:20:15,800 --> 00:20:18,199 Speaker 6: is in heaven, two are living. But I grew up 457 00:20:18,200 --> 00:20:20,360 Speaker 6: an only child, and I grew up a theater kid 458 00:20:20,440 --> 00:20:22,879 Speaker 6: as well, and I went to parochial school where a 459 00:20:22,920 --> 00:20:25,680 Speaker 6: lot of shit was going on. I was being you know, 460 00:20:25,760 --> 00:20:27,720 Speaker 6: I was being called the N word every day. A 461 00:20:27,800 --> 00:20:30,680 Speaker 6: whole bunch of shit was going on. So I withdrew 462 00:20:31,040 --> 00:20:34,320 Speaker 6: very early on in life to just be a loner, 463 00:20:34,640 --> 00:20:37,159 Speaker 6: right and not really open up to people and be 464 00:20:37,280 --> 00:20:41,520 Speaker 6: around people. And also I'm combating that I wasn't the 465 00:20:41,680 --> 00:20:46,000 Speaker 6: traditional like my background is pretty conservative, and I was 466 00:20:46,000 --> 00:20:47,760 Speaker 6: always pushing against that, you know. 467 00:20:48,000 --> 00:20:50,760 Speaker 3: So for me, it's like there is a reckless abandon 468 00:20:50,840 --> 00:20:52,480 Speaker 3: with me. I fuck it, I don't care. 469 00:20:53,040 --> 00:20:55,040 Speaker 6: Nobody's gonna tell me how to be, how to live 470 00:20:55,119 --> 00:20:57,320 Speaker 6: you're not going to restrict me in any ways, and 471 00:20:57,480 --> 00:21:00,840 Speaker 6: sometimes that can come off very chaotic. And then I 472 00:21:00,920 --> 00:21:02,800 Speaker 6: get to be around Chelsea and I get to relax 473 00:21:02,840 --> 00:21:05,520 Speaker 6: because she knows what she wants, She's got her head 474 00:21:05,560 --> 00:21:08,479 Speaker 6: on straight, and everything is just in line. So sometimes 475 00:21:08,480 --> 00:21:11,320 Speaker 6: I do feel like I can just lay with her 476 00:21:11,560 --> 00:21:13,920 Speaker 6: and not have to worry about certain things, you know, 477 00:21:14,600 --> 00:21:16,160 Speaker 6: and that feels feels good. 478 00:21:17,920 --> 00:21:19,879 Speaker 1: I like to provide that you do. 479 00:21:21,320 --> 00:21:23,879 Speaker 3: You know, our backgrounds are a lot more similar than 480 00:21:23,920 --> 00:21:24,240 Speaker 3: you think. 481 00:21:24,720 --> 00:21:27,680 Speaker 6: But I think for me to come back into a 482 00:21:27,840 --> 00:21:31,560 Speaker 6: space where, like you know, I'm almost fifty, I'm forty seven, 483 00:21:31,880 --> 00:21:33,920 Speaker 6: there's a lot of things going on where I'm looking 484 00:21:33,960 --> 00:21:36,280 Speaker 6: at myself as an adult too, Like how do I 485 00:21:36,359 --> 00:21:38,040 Speaker 6: want to show up in the world. How do I 486 00:21:38,040 --> 00:21:41,000 Speaker 6: want to show up around other people and make them 487 00:21:41,080 --> 00:21:45,320 Speaker 6: feel better about shitty situations. I felt neglected, I felt unseen, 488 00:21:45,760 --> 00:21:48,600 Speaker 6: I felt unloved. And that's why the volume is so loud, 489 00:21:48,880 --> 00:21:51,000 Speaker 6: That's why it is so much in your face, because 490 00:21:51,480 --> 00:21:54,480 Speaker 6: I know I sat home and cried, and I don't 491 00:21:54,520 --> 00:21:56,800 Speaker 6: want anybody else to do that. So I appreciate people 492 00:21:56,880 --> 00:21:58,800 Speaker 6: who say to me, you know what, you made me 493 00:21:58,840 --> 00:22:01,960 Speaker 6: feel good, like your material. I like what you're saying. 494 00:22:02,040 --> 00:22:04,520 Speaker 6: I feel represented. That's a really big deal for me. 495 00:22:04,840 --> 00:22:07,680 Speaker 6: So right now, Also, my focus is just comedy. It's 496 00:22:07,720 --> 00:22:09,160 Speaker 6: not necessarily where I'm living. 497 00:22:09,440 --> 00:22:11,840 Speaker 3: What close I got on, you know, I'm just a 498 00:22:12,000 --> 00:22:15,560 Speaker 3: nomad running around this world, going to CVSS, going to 499 00:22:15,640 --> 00:22:17,240 Speaker 3: cv CVS. 500 00:22:17,520 --> 00:22:21,760 Speaker 1: Marshall's different. She was dragging around a suitcase, this little 501 00:22:21,840 --> 00:22:23,760 Speaker 1: mini like what would you call that purse? 502 00:22:24,000 --> 00:22:27,119 Speaker 3: It's a person is boutique in Las Vegas. It was great. 503 00:22:27,560 --> 00:22:29,840 Speaker 6: She didn't like it, and then I let this bitch 504 00:22:29,960 --> 00:22:32,720 Speaker 6: pressure me into getting rid of it. When I was 505 00:22:32,800 --> 00:22:35,280 Speaker 6: at LaGuardia, I still had the bag. I said, oh shit, 506 00:22:35,680 --> 00:22:37,520 Speaker 6: she doesn't like this bag. She's gonna dog me for 507 00:22:37,600 --> 00:22:40,000 Speaker 6: this bag. So I went and bought a new bag 508 00:22:40,280 --> 00:22:43,000 Speaker 6: at LaGuardia, and then I said to the woman that 509 00:22:43,200 --> 00:22:44,760 Speaker 6: was I was buying it from. I was like, oh 510 00:22:44,800 --> 00:22:45,960 Speaker 6: my god, I don't know what I'm gonna do with 511 00:22:46,040 --> 00:22:48,480 Speaker 6: this bag, and she goes, oh, I'll find somebody to 512 00:22:48,520 --> 00:22:49,960 Speaker 6: take it. I was like, I bet you will, bitch. 513 00:22:50,080 --> 00:22:55,000 Speaker 6: It was a fantastic bag. But then this person told 514 00:22:55,040 --> 00:22:55,520 Speaker 6: me that she. 515 00:22:55,560 --> 00:22:58,640 Speaker 3: Didn't like it. I don't like you looked like a bag. 516 00:22:58,760 --> 00:23:03,600 Speaker 1: Lady sophisticated one wasn't She was open and ship was 517 00:23:03,640 --> 00:23:06,200 Speaker 1: spilling out of it because she's got liquids. She travels. 518 00:23:06,240 --> 00:23:09,560 Speaker 1: Her suitcase is filled with different liquids like drinks, like 519 00:23:09,840 --> 00:23:12,720 Speaker 1: energy drinks are in the suitcase that she travels a lot. 520 00:23:12,600 --> 00:23:14,120 Speaker 3: Of way to just liquid is good. 521 00:23:16,359 --> 00:23:21,520 Speaker 6: Stop eating whole ship, Stop eating substances of like conversation. 522 00:23:23,400 --> 00:23:24,320 Speaker 1: Did you spoke a joint? 523 00:23:24,400 --> 00:23:26,119 Speaker 3: I didn't give me some of this? Oh no, I 524 00:23:26,160 --> 00:23:28,960 Speaker 3: got to get another one, little dog walker? I know 525 00:23:29,119 --> 00:23:31,840 Speaker 3: I should have got Remember I have that big one. 526 00:23:32,359 --> 00:23:36,000 Speaker 3: Should I go get that can break doing this? You 527 00:23:36,040 --> 00:23:37,840 Speaker 3: didn't want that? I got the eighth of the world. 528 00:23:37,960 --> 00:23:38,280 Speaker 10: Give me this. 529 00:23:38,440 --> 00:23:39,479 Speaker 3: The light, the light, the light. 530 00:23:39,560 --> 00:23:39,800 Speaker 7: Baby. 531 00:23:41,280 --> 00:23:42,159 Speaker 3: Well it's so small. 532 00:23:42,560 --> 00:23:43,560 Speaker 1: It's a dog walker. 533 00:23:44,119 --> 00:23:44,800 Speaker 3: What does that mean? 534 00:23:46,000 --> 00:23:47,240 Speaker 1: The fleet last? 535 00:23:47,280 --> 00:23:48,600 Speaker 8: The amount of time to listen to. 536 00:23:51,240 --> 00:23:52,359 Speaker 1: This is really funny. 537 00:23:52,760 --> 00:23:53,959 Speaker 3: This is like a snack. 538 00:23:54,080 --> 00:23:55,240 Speaker 1: It's like a snack joint. 539 00:23:56,000 --> 00:23:58,560 Speaker 3: So the dog got to piss, poop right away and 540 00:23:58,680 --> 00:24:02,520 Speaker 3: then come back. Because this is my cats wouldney more 541 00:24:02,520 --> 00:24:03,320 Speaker 3: than it is a bottle walk? 542 00:24:03,400 --> 00:24:03,560 Speaker 7: Fim? 543 00:24:08,000 --> 00:24:09,399 Speaker 10: Are we supposed to take callers for this? 544 00:24:09,760 --> 00:24:14,800 Speaker 1: We got we got collar, all right, so let's do that. 545 00:24:15,200 --> 00:24:16,199 Speaker 8: Okay, all right? 546 00:24:16,240 --> 00:24:19,880 Speaker 2: Our first caller today is Bella and her subject line, 547 00:24:19,880 --> 00:24:24,200 Speaker 2: by the way, is my brother's wife's lover. What Dear Chelsea, 548 00:24:24,600 --> 00:24:27,119 Speaker 2: My brother just dropped a huge bomb on me. My 549 00:24:27,200 --> 00:24:29,359 Speaker 2: brother's ten years my junior, and we have always been 550 00:24:29,480 --> 00:24:31,639 Speaker 2: very close. We lived in the same building together in 551 00:24:31,760 --> 00:24:34,360 Speaker 2: NYC for over twenty years. He moved out ten years 552 00:24:34,359 --> 00:24:36,000 Speaker 2: ago when he and his wife had their first child. 553 00:24:36,520 --> 00:24:39,040 Speaker 2: While on a peaceful vacation, recently, my brother called with 554 00:24:39,119 --> 00:24:41,680 Speaker 2: a bombshell. He told me his wife is having a 555 00:24:41,800 --> 00:24:45,359 Speaker 2: consensual affair with a female family friend. He said they 556 00:24:45,400 --> 00:24:47,399 Speaker 2: were all open to it at first, but now his 557 00:24:47,520 --> 00:24:49,760 Speaker 2: wife has feelings for the other woman, who is also 558 00:24:49,880 --> 00:24:53,600 Speaker 2: married to a man. I was stunned, cried, and I 559 00:24:53,720 --> 00:24:57,160 Speaker 2: was upset. Not because I'm judgy. I'm open, liberal and fair. 560 00:24:57,680 --> 00:25:00,800 Speaker 2: My feelings were reactive for the kids and the family dynamic. 561 00:25:01,320 --> 00:25:04,000 Speaker 2: He's now unhappy with the agreement and she is conflicted. 562 00:25:04,240 --> 00:25:05,719 Speaker 2: My main concern is for the children. 563 00:25:06,080 --> 00:25:08,440 Speaker 1: I did advise my brother, but I need additional advice. 564 00:25:08,680 --> 00:25:10,560 Speaker 1: What would you do if this was your brother? What 565 00:25:10,600 --> 00:25:11,479 Speaker 1: would you advise him? 566 00:25:11,640 --> 00:25:11,960 Speaker 3: Bella? 567 00:25:12,280 --> 00:25:15,639 Speaker 2: Hi, Bella, Hi, We've got Yaminika here. 568 00:25:15,920 --> 00:25:19,119 Speaker 3: Hi Bella, my baby, how are you. 569 00:25:19,600 --> 00:25:20,959 Speaker 8: I I'm well hi, Chelsea. 570 00:25:21,200 --> 00:25:24,800 Speaker 1: Oh god, what an interesting dilemma. It's kind of like 571 00:25:24,880 --> 00:25:27,400 Speaker 1: a I mean, I know this is your family member 572 00:25:27,520 --> 00:25:29,320 Speaker 1: and your brother, but it's kind of like a sign 573 00:25:29,400 --> 00:25:33,119 Speaker 1: of the times, like women are just like we're wrapped. 574 00:25:33,280 --> 00:25:35,960 Speaker 1: Women are rapped with men. They're ready for it to 575 00:25:36,040 --> 00:25:38,880 Speaker 1: be with a woman like it is. It's so prevalent, 576 00:25:39,600 --> 00:25:41,600 Speaker 1: and it's like we're on the cusp of like it 577 00:25:41,720 --> 00:25:44,959 Speaker 1: becoming an even bigger thing, like at the tipping point. Almost. 578 00:25:45,720 --> 00:25:49,440 Speaker 9: Yeah, it's not actually the shock of the woman, it's 579 00:25:49,680 --> 00:25:54,440 Speaker 9: just how she went about it and just the disrespect, 580 00:25:54,680 --> 00:25:56,600 Speaker 9: you know, like this big bomb. 581 00:25:57,000 --> 00:25:58,160 Speaker 1: Where are things right now? 582 00:25:58,359 --> 00:26:00,720 Speaker 2: Is has there been a transition at all? Everyone's still 583 00:26:00,720 --> 00:26:02,119 Speaker 2: living in their same homes? 584 00:26:02,840 --> 00:26:05,640 Speaker 8: Yeah, so everyone is still living in the same homes. 585 00:26:06,240 --> 00:26:06,399 Speaker 7: You know. 586 00:26:06,600 --> 00:26:10,320 Speaker 8: My mom lives in the house too, my eighty two 587 00:26:10,400 --> 00:26:10,960 Speaker 8: year old mother. 588 00:26:11,480 --> 00:26:13,399 Speaker 3: Oh, and she got to deal with all this musical 589 00:26:13,520 --> 00:26:16,040 Speaker 3: chairs in the bedroom. Yeah, does she know what's going on? 590 00:26:17,000 --> 00:26:17,520 Speaker 8: She does. 591 00:26:18,400 --> 00:26:20,600 Speaker 3: What's opinion about all of this? 592 00:26:21,480 --> 00:26:25,360 Speaker 9: Well, she's eighty two years old, and she was incredibly 593 00:26:25,560 --> 00:26:29,720 Speaker 9: shocked and you know, surprised because this is someone that 594 00:26:30,000 --> 00:26:32,840 Speaker 9: was hanging out with our family, Like I said, I 595 00:26:33,000 --> 00:26:35,600 Speaker 9: moved up here, very close to my brother, the kids 596 00:26:35,680 --> 00:26:40,440 Speaker 9: and everybody, and this woman was around. We had a 597 00:26:40,520 --> 00:26:43,119 Speaker 9: holiday together, we had Thanksgiving together. 598 00:26:43,720 --> 00:26:44,760 Speaker 3: Are you still in New York? 599 00:26:45,440 --> 00:26:47,120 Speaker 8: I'm an hour north of New York. 600 00:26:47,240 --> 00:26:50,080 Speaker 6: Now, whenever you come into the city, I got two 601 00:26:50,160 --> 00:26:52,560 Speaker 6: tickets for you. Come see me at the cellar. Okay, 602 00:26:53,119 --> 00:26:55,040 Speaker 6: just for this wod deal. Maybe bring your brother in. 603 00:26:55,760 --> 00:26:57,320 Speaker 6: Let me know how many tikeies need. I'll take care 604 00:26:57,320 --> 00:26:59,760 Speaker 6: of you. Maybe we can work this out there. I 605 00:27:01,480 --> 00:27:04,920 Speaker 6: got you, We'll connect, Okay. I think what the problem 606 00:27:05,080 --> 00:27:08,320 Speaker 6: is is you see this as a betrayal. But we 607 00:27:08,440 --> 00:27:11,280 Speaker 6: have to go back to the beginning that it was consensual, right, 608 00:27:11,600 --> 00:27:14,000 Speaker 6: So at some point it seems like your brother agreed 609 00:27:14,560 --> 00:27:18,400 Speaker 6: to this dynamic, and you can't help falling in love 610 00:27:18,480 --> 00:27:21,200 Speaker 6: with somebody once you open the door of intimacy. So 611 00:27:21,440 --> 00:27:24,320 Speaker 6: if she didn't just went into a physical thing and 612 00:27:24,440 --> 00:27:26,600 Speaker 6: didn't know she was going to fall in love, It's 613 00:27:26,680 --> 00:27:31,200 Speaker 6: like Chelsea would say, whipsie doodle. But once you have 614 00:27:31,359 --> 00:27:33,399 Speaker 6: to think about all the things that you open up 615 00:27:33,760 --> 00:27:35,840 Speaker 6: when you put yourself in that situation. Now, on the 616 00:27:35,880 --> 00:27:39,639 Speaker 6: flip side, I do understand what you mean about the kids. 617 00:27:40,040 --> 00:27:41,000 Speaker 3: How they're gonna. 618 00:27:40,760 --> 00:27:44,000 Speaker 6: Feel this whole relationship dynamic. But we are in a 619 00:27:44,119 --> 00:27:47,359 Speaker 6: time where the world is changing. In our time, if 620 00:27:47,440 --> 00:27:49,959 Speaker 6: something like that happened, people would have to go to therapy, 621 00:27:50,080 --> 00:27:52,040 Speaker 6: nobody would know what to do, and then it would 622 00:27:52,080 --> 00:27:55,880 Speaker 6: be hush hush. Now the children, your nieces and nephews 623 00:27:55,960 --> 00:27:59,040 Speaker 6: are also dealing with other kids who are also having 624 00:27:59,119 --> 00:28:01,480 Speaker 6: the sype with dynamic mix in their families, so it 625 00:28:01,520 --> 00:28:03,320 Speaker 6: won't be so isolating for them. 626 00:28:03,760 --> 00:28:06,200 Speaker 3: So I think if you can somehow find a way, 627 00:28:06,640 --> 00:28:08,040 Speaker 3: which is going to be hard. 628 00:28:07,920 --> 00:28:10,960 Speaker 6: Right, to not be so emotional about it and see 629 00:28:11,000 --> 00:28:13,720 Speaker 6: how you can come in and maybe help write or 630 00:28:13,840 --> 00:28:15,840 Speaker 6: be a lending hand to them how they need it, 631 00:28:16,280 --> 00:28:18,800 Speaker 6: that would be better served for them than the judgment 632 00:28:18,840 --> 00:28:20,360 Speaker 6: that they're getting through this process. 633 00:28:21,000 --> 00:28:25,000 Speaker 8: I agree with you, I do, I do. But you 634 00:28:25,119 --> 00:28:27,280 Speaker 8: know where we are now is in a very. 635 00:28:27,480 --> 00:28:32,040 Speaker 6: Small town and everybody and everybody business right, correct. 636 00:28:32,119 --> 00:28:34,160 Speaker 1: Yeah, what was the advice that you gave your brother? 637 00:28:35,200 --> 00:28:37,800 Speaker 9: Well, at the time, I just told them to take 638 00:28:37,840 --> 00:28:41,800 Speaker 9: a step back. And yes, I agree with Yaminika was consensual. 639 00:28:42,400 --> 00:28:46,800 Speaker 8: You know, they were doing their thing more than I 640 00:28:47,040 --> 00:28:47,840 Speaker 8: ever expected. 641 00:28:48,160 --> 00:28:49,040 Speaker 10: But that's all good. 642 00:28:49,160 --> 00:28:52,320 Speaker 9: You know, you do you I think, yeah, now, it's 643 00:28:52,440 --> 00:28:56,720 Speaker 9: more like the betrayal, like you said, the disrespect to 644 00:28:56,880 --> 00:28:59,120 Speaker 9: my mom, to the family, to the kids. 645 00:28:58,920 --> 00:29:02,200 Speaker 2: And wow, well I have a question about that, because 646 00:29:03,200 --> 00:29:05,920 Speaker 2: where is the disrespect coming in. Is this our betrayal 647 00:29:06,000 --> 00:29:08,240 Speaker 2: coming in because it sounds like everybody was on board 648 00:29:08,280 --> 00:29:10,680 Speaker 2: with this when it started. I don't know that it 649 00:29:10,760 --> 00:29:14,120 Speaker 2: is a betrayal to say, well, I started a relationship 650 00:29:14,200 --> 00:29:17,960 Speaker 2: with this other person with everyone's consent, and then I fell. 651 00:29:17,840 --> 00:29:18,760 Speaker 3: In love with this person. 652 00:29:19,440 --> 00:29:22,880 Speaker 9: I mean, was there other stuff going on or well 653 00:29:23,000 --> 00:29:26,240 Speaker 9: he had asked her to stop when it started getting 654 00:29:26,280 --> 00:29:29,880 Speaker 9: too crazy, because then they agreed that they were going 655 00:29:29,960 --> 00:29:32,560 Speaker 9: to stop because it was getting out of hand, okay, 656 00:29:32,680 --> 00:29:37,240 Speaker 9: And then when he asked her to stop, it just continued, 657 00:29:37,320 --> 00:29:40,040 Speaker 9: and she was, you know, kind of sneaking around and 658 00:29:40,160 --> 00:29:44,600 Speaker 9: going around and yeah, he behaved badly too during this time. 659 00:29:44,800 --> 00:29:46,680 Speaker 9: And then he had said to her, listen, this is 660 00:29:46,760 --> 00:29:51,360 Speaker 9: going to destroy us, to destroy the family, and sure enough, 661 00:29:51,480 --> 00:29:52,040 Speaker 9: here we are. 662 00:29:52,640 --> 00:29:55,440 Speaker 2: Yeah, it's a belly you can't unring, you know. 663 00:29:56,360 --> 00:29:59,080 Speaker 9: I guess the disrespect to me now is that she's 664 00:29:59,160 --> 00:30:04,040 Speaker 9: still running around with this woman with the kids, and 665 00:30:04,160 --> 00:30:06,640 Speaker 9: I just keep thinking, I mean, if it were a double. 666 00:30:06,680 --> 00:30:08,800 Speaker 9: See if my brother now falls in love with a 667 00:30:08,920 --> 00:30:12,400 Speaker 9: man and takes the kids around with the man, how 668 00:30:12,440 --> 00:30:13,800 Speaker 9: will she feel about. 669 00:30:13,720 --> 00:30:16,320 Speaker 1: I have to be really honest with you in this moment. 670 00:30:16,600 --> 00:30:18,680 Speaker 1: I feel like you have I know it's your brother, 671 00:30:18,960 --> 00:30:21,920 Speaker 1: but you have so much judgment coming from you. You're 672 00:30:22,000 --> 00:30:26,040 Speaker 1: not She's not trying to humiliate you. She's not. This 673 00:30:26,200 --> 00:30:29,080 Speaker 1: isn't intentional. You can't help it. Like they had an 674 00:30:29,120 --> 00:30:31,000 Speaker 1: open relationship and she fell in love, And I know 675 00:30:31,080 --> 00:30:33,720 Speaker 1: that's hurtful for you to your brother, but like, you 676 00:30:33,960 --> 00:30:37,080 Speaker 1: have to let go of your anger towards her. It's 677 00:30:37,320 --> 00:30:39,920 Speaker 1: not going to be helpful. That energy is not going 678 00:30:40,000 --> 00:30:42,640 Speaker 1: to help the situation that you're in at all. You 679 00:30:42,760 --> 00:30:45,680 Speaker 1: need to be a positive influence on the situation and 680 00:30:45,840 --> 00:30:48,680 Speaker 1: positively support your brother. You don't need to hate on 681 00:30:48,880 --> 00:30:52,440 Speaker 1: this woman and what she did to support your brother. Like, 682 00:30:52,640 --> 00:30:55,680 Speaker 1: it's life. Shit happens. People fall in love and they 683 00:30:55,760 --> 00:30:57,760 Speaker 1: fall out of love, And what you can do is 684 00:30:57,840 --> 00:30:59,720 Speaker 1: be a beam of light and support for your brother. 685 00:31:00,080 --> 00:31:03,240 Speaker 1: And that's all. You don't have to deal with her Like, yes, 686 00:31:03,320 --> 00:31:04,920 Speaker 1: I know it's part of your life, but give her 687 00:31:04,960 --> 00:31:06,560 Speaker 1: a break. Just be cool. 688 00:31:07,360 --> 00:31:10,480 Speaker 2: Yeah, And I think you know, being the age that 689 00:31:10,560 --> 00:31:13,400 Speaker 2: we are, we grew up in this era of compulsory 690 00:31:13,560 --> 00:31:16,440 Speaker 2: heterosexuality right where it was like the default is that 691 00:31:16,520 --> 00:31:19,160 Speaker 2: you are straight, and this woman, I think, has discovered that, 692 00:31:19,280 --> 00:31:23,120 Speaker 2: like her sexuality is somewhere else on the spectrum other 693 00:31:23,240 --> 00:31:24,040 Speaker 2: than just straight. 694 00:31:24,240 --> 00:31:26,600 Speaker 1: And there's a judgment for that from you as well, 695 00:31:26,840 --> 00:31:29,720 Speaker 1: Like I can see you know, and you got it like, yeah, 696 00:31:29,880 --> 00:31:32,959 Speaker 1: that's old, that's old thinking, that's like the olden times. 697 00:31:33,360 --> 00:31:37,040 Speaker 1: It's okay, it's not humiliating that she's a lesbian. Now, 698 00:31:37,440 --> 00:31:39,360 Speaker 1: that's not a humiliation on your family. 699 00:31:39,560 --> 00:31:44,040 Speaker 6: It's not a humiliation at all, right, But also the 700 00:31:44,120 --> 00:31:47,160 Speaker 6: sting of it is that's family, right, so it no 701 00:31:47,360 --> 00:31:51,000 Speaker 6: matter what, once you betray my family, like I'm done 702 00:31:51,040 --> 00:31:54,480 Speaker 6: with you. When they were supposed to stop, she should 703 00:31:54,480 --> 00:31:56,680 Speaker 6: have been honest at that point said I can't stop 704 00:31:56,800 --> 00:32:00,240 Speaker 6: because now I'm in love. Let's take sexuality out of 705 00:32:00,280 --> 00:32:02,320 Speaker 6: it for a second, because when she went into the shit, 706 00:32:02,440 --> 00:32:05,480 Speaker 6: she was at the very least by because she's going 707 00:32:05,560 --> 00:32:07,320 Speaker 6: she went to go fuck a woman, not a man. 708 00:32:07,400 --> 00:32:09,200 Speaker 3: Okay, so we could take that off the table. 709 00:32:09,880 --> 00:32:13,160 Speaker 6: What happened is whatever she found over there on that table, 710 00:32:14,040 --> 00:32:18,440 Speaker 6: it was replacing more than whatever your brother was giving her. 711 00:32:18,800 --> 00:32:22,840 Speaker 6: She fell in love, not in lust. In love that 712 00:32:22,960 --> 00:32:25,760 Speaker 6: means I want you outside of fucking you. I want 713 00:32:25,840 --> 00:32:28,320 Speaker 6: the relationship. I want to see you, I want to talk. 714 00:32:28,320 --> 00:32:30,840 Speaker 6: You are my person. And I think they need to 715 00:32:30,920 --> 00:32:34,560 Speaker 6: be honest about maybe they just need to separate altogether. 716 00:32:35,360 --> 00:32:39,440 Speaker 8: Yes, yeah, And I'm not being judging that it's a woman. Honestly, 717 00:32:39,520 --> 00:32:40,520 Speaker 8: I'm not not not judging. 718 00:32:40,560 --> 00:32:41,760 Speaker 6: But you know what, Bill, let me just say this, 719 00:32:41,840 --> 00:32:44,480 Speaker 6: and I'm saying this out of love. When you said 720 00:32:44,880 --> 00:32:48,880 Speaker 6: how would they feel if my brother was going around 721 00:32:49,160 --> 00:32:52,320 Speaker 6: with a man? That makes it a judgment on sexuality 722 00:32:52,560 --> 00:32:54,320 Speaker 6: because why didn't you just say if he was going 723 00:32:54,400 --> 00:32:55,800 Speaker 6: around with another lover? 724 00:32:56,160 --> 00:32:56,320 Speaker 7: Right? 725 00:32:56,640 --> 00:32:59,080 Speaker 6: So when you say things like that, it sings like 726 00:32:59,400 --> 00:33:02,280 Speaker 6: maybe there's a little bit of homophobia there, maybe there's 727 00:33:02,680 --> 00:33:05,800 Speaker 6: some concern. Why are you so concerned about male and 728 00:33:05,920 --> 00:33:08,960 Speaker 6: female in this situation? But at the same time, I 729 00:33:09,040 --> 00:33:11,560 Speaker 6: think emotions are going to be high for you regardless 730 00:33:11,880 --> 00:33:14,640 Speaker 6: because this is your brother. The way you described him 731 00:33:14,640 --> 00:33:17,080 Speaker 6: in this letter was like, oh, they really fuck with 732 00:33:17,120 --> 00:33:19,360 Speaker 6: each other like that, and she loves her brother dad right, right, 733 00:33:19,480 --> 00:33:22,680 Speaker 6: So your judgment is completely clouded in this situation. 734 00:33:22,600 --> 00:33:24,680 Speaker 2: Well, and I think like the place you want to 735 00:33:24,720 --> 00:33:26,520 Speaker 2: get to, or you want your brother to get to 736 00:33:27,080 --> 00:33:29,840 Speaker 2: is however this shakes out whoever winds up with whom 737 00:33:30,480 --> 00:33:34,720 Speaker 2: You want those kids to have happiness, to have adults 738 00:33:34,760 --> 00:33:36,640 Speaker 2: in their life that love them, even if. 739 00:33:36,560 --> 00:33:38,560 Speaker 3: That's not your brother together. 740 00:33:38,880 --> 00:33:41,640 Speaker 2: Yeah, exactly, like people who love them and care for them. 741 00:33:41,680 --> 00:33:44,600 Speaker 2: You want them to feel held. But like there's gonna 742 00:33:44,600 --> 00:33:47,040 Speaker 2: be some complicated stuff to get to that point. So 743 00:33:47,080 --> 00:33:50,000 Speaker 2: I think your role here is just to like absolutely 744 00:33:50,000 --> 00:33:53,080 Speaker 2: support everyone, be there for the kids, and then also 745 00:33:53,200 --> 00:33:56,720 Speaker 2: like speak positively about their mom, like nothing is gonna 746 00:33:56,720 --> 00:33:59,640 Speaker 2: come of, you know, any trash or negativity there. 747 00:34:00,320 --> 00:34:03,720 Speaker 8: And definitely nothing like that. Yeah, no, I don't think 748 00:34:03,760 --> 00:34:04,080 Speaker 8: you would. 749 00:34:04,200 --> 00:34:07,719 Speaker 2: But just getting everyone as quickly as possible and as 750 00:34:07,760 --> 00:34:10,279 Speaker 2: smoothly as possible to the place where like they can 751 00:34:10,440 --> 00:34:14,279 Speaker 2: have multiple families that love them and everyone gets along 752 00:34:14,360 --> 00:34:16,480 Speaker 2: really well, even though there's going to be some complicated 753 00:34:16,680 --> 00:34:17,399 Speaker 2: stuff in the middle. 754 00:34:17,560 --> 00:34:19,960 Speaker 1: Yeah, and it happens, It can happen. 755 00:34:20,080 --> 00:34:20,719 Speaker 3: We've all seen it. 756 00:34:20,920 --> 00:34:22,640 Speaker 1: Think about it like you'd want to think about it 757 00:34:22,719 --> 00:34:25,600 Speaker 1: in five years, Like you handled this with grace and 758 00:34:25,760 --> 00:34:29,160 Speaker 1: a plum, you know, like, oh you were a beam 759 00:34:29,280 --> 00:34:32,239 Speaker 1: of support for people, and you helped transition them into 760 00:34:32,280 --> 00:34:32,920 Speaker 1: the next phase. 761 00:34:33,719 --> 00:34:35,760 Speaker 6: And I see a lot of you and me Bela 762 00:34:35,880 --> 00:34:38,560 Speaker 6: in terms of like like I receive information. I know 763 00:34:38,680 --> 00:34:41,080 Speaker 6: some of this may be grading on you, but also 764 00:34:41,239 --> 00:34:43,600 Speaker 6: some of it. You're glad you know you're receiving this. 765 00:34:44,160 --> 00:34:46,320 Speaker 6: Take all that we've given you, and then run it 766 00:34:46,360 --> 00:34:48,520 Speaker 6: through your own filter, which is what I would be doing, 767 00:34:48,960 --> 00:34:49,920 Speaker 6: and then find. 768 00:34:49,680 --> 00:34:52,520 Speaker 1: Out because find your local cvs H. 769 00:34:53,000 --> 00:34:55,640 Speaker 3: But you know, I really feel for you in this situation. 770 00:34:55,800 --> 00:34:58,200 Speaker 6: You have such a beautiful presence about yourself and spirit, 771 00:34:58,400 --> 00:35:00,759 Speaker 6: and I know you just want the best. So but 772 00:35:00,880 --> 00:35:04,359 Speaker 6: I know for me there was nothing. There's nothing better 773 00:35:04,480 --> 00:35:07,560 Speaker 6: in my life than my aunt, no matter what the 774 00:35:07,640 --> 00:35:08,360 Speaker 6: love of mind. 775 00:35:08,400 --> 00:35:12,680 Speaker 8: And I honestly I know I'm I'm not judging. I mean, 776 00:35:12,960 --> 00:35:13,400 Speaker 8: trust me. 777 00:35:13,480 --> 00:35:16,839 Speaker 9: If I could describe my life in New York City, 778 00:35:16,960 --> 00:35:21,440 Speaker 9: I was wild and in every gay club like it's 779 00:35:21,560 --> 00:35:22,919 Speaker 9: nothing like that at all. 780 00:35:23,320 --> 00:35:24,680 Speaker 3: Yeah, I was with you. 781 00:35:25,560 --> 00:35:28,920 Speaker 1: Yeah, probably absolutely. 782 00:35:29,280 --> 00:35:30,320 Speaker 8: No problem with that. 783 00:35:30,520 --> 00:35:34,200 Speaker 9: It's the problem I have is mainly just with with 784 00:35:34,360 --> 00:35:39,160 Speaker 9: the bomb that went off and the disrespect, and and 785 00:35:39,280 --> 00:35:42,720 Speaker 9: I worry for my niece and nephew mainly. 786 00:35:43,160 --> 00:35:46,360 Speaker 3: Really they'll be fine. I promise you they'll be fine. 787 00:35:47,120 --> 00:35:47,719 Speaker 3: They really will. 788 00:35:48,960 --> 00:35:52,640 Speaker 6: It's not Mayberry, it's not leave it to Beava. It's 789 00:35:52,719 --> 00:35:54,960 Speaker 6: people doing all kinds of shit out here in this world. 790 00:35:55,160 --> 00:35:55,440 Speaker 3: Okay. 791 00:35:55,600 --> 00:35:57,759 Speaker 6: And what you told me is dame compared to what 792 00:35:58,040 --> 00:36:00,520 Speaker 6: I've been showing Chelsea Dix from some guy barely know. 793 00:36:00,719 --> 00:36:04,200 Speaker 3: And it's like, you know, with him off, it's like, 794 00:36:04,400 --> 00:36:05,520 Speaker 3: so when you talk. 795 00:36:05,360 --> 00:36:09,120 Speaker 1: About that, Yeah, she has phone sex three times is so. 796 00:36:09,320 --> 00:36:14,400 Speaker 6: Amazing, you know whatever, It's gorgeous, I mean, delicious, Okay, appropriate, 797 00:36:14,440 --> 00:36:14,600 Speaker 6: I know. 798 00:36:15,560 --> 00:36:22,160 Speaker 1: Okay, Bella, take our take our advice, like listen to 799 00:36:22,239 --> 00:36:24,360 Speaker 1: what we said, and then we like we listen to 800 00:36:24,440 --> 00:36:25,800 Speaker 1: this because it will help you. 801 00:36:26,440 --> 00:36:31,120 Speaker 9: Okay, yeah, yeah, I definitely will. I'll follow up and 802 00:36:31,239 --> 00:36:32,719 Speaker 9: like you all know, please. 803 00:36:34,320 --> 00:36:36,239 Speaker 2: Put us in like six months or so and like 804 00:36:36,320 --> 00:36:37,920 Speaker 2: let us know how things are shaking out over there. 805 00:36:37,960 --> 00:36:43,479 Speaker 9: Okay, definitely, thank you, take care, bye bye. 806 00:36:44,280 --> 00:36:47,680 Speaker 6: That was that was always give us some really fucking 807 00:36:47,719 --> 00:36:48,280 Speaker 6: great advice. 808 00:36:48,320 --> 00:36:53,600 Speaker 1: I can't stand in love with me. It's another personality. 809 00:36:54,320 --> 00:36:55,440 Speaker 1: This is what which what? 810 00:36:55,719 --> 00:36:55,960 Speaker 7: This is? 811 00:36:56,040 --> 00:36:58,480 Speaker 1: What I want to what can we call it? What's 812 00:36:58,520 --> 00:37:00,200 Speaker 1: our name for the one that loves me? 813 00:37:01,400 --> 00:37:01,640 Speaker 7: Just me? 814 00:37:01,880 --> 00:37:02,040 Speaker 1: Though? 815 00:37:02,280 --> 00:37:04,200 Speaker 3: Like, were you let's call her Justine. 816 00:37:05,160 --> 00:37:07,719 Speaker 1: Oh that's boring. What about Lawanda? 817 00:37:08,040 --> 00:37:11,719 Speaker 3: What do you always every fucking name you pull up 818 00:37:11,840 --> 00:37:14,000 Speaker 3: got to be so bitch that goes to the swap 819 00:37:14,080 --> 00:37:15,640 Speaker 3: meet in Anglewood? 820 00:37:15,920 --> 00:37:23,680 Speaker 1: Stop it, Chelsea, what's our next situation? 821 00:37:24,200 --> 00:37:24,480 Speaker 8: Okay? 822 00:37:24,760 --> 00:37:27,200 Speaker 2: So with that was that was a little messy, We're 823 00:37:27,239 --> 00:37:30,400 Speaker 2: gonna about to get a little messy or these are 824 00:37:30,480 --> 00:37:38,680 Speaker 2: good yes, so McKinley says, Dear Chelsea, I'm a forty 825 00:37:38,719 --> 00:37:39,480 Speaker 2: three or are we. 826 00:37:42,200 --> 00:37:42,439 Speaker 4: Both? 827 00:37:42,480 --> 00:37:44,880 Speaker 6: Would you said it was getting messy and and you 828 00:37:45,000 --> 00:37:47,160 Speaker 6: took the words writing about Okay? 829 00:37:49,560 --> 00:37:53,839 Speaker 2: Okay, dear Chelsea, I'm a forty three year old ex 830 00:37:53,960 --> 00:38:03,480 Speaker 2: Mormon trans guy with two kids from parents weird. I'm 831 00:38:03,480 --> 00:38:08,160 Speaker 2: a forty three year old ex Mormon trans man got 832 00:38:08,200 --> 00:38:12,799 Speaker 2: it with two kids from my previous marriage to a man. Okay, Yeah, 833 00:38:17,520 --> 00:38:19,759 Speaker 2: my birthday is coming back, and I'm really hoping this 834 00:38:19,920 --> 00:38:22,240 Speaker 2: next year is less about cleaning up all my exes. 835 00:38:22,360 --> 00:38:26,040 Speaker 2: Whoosie doodles. My main issue is with my kid's dad. 836 00:38:26,360 --> 00:38:29,120 Speaker 2: On paper, he's supposed to have visitations, but in real 837 00:38:29,200 --> 00:38:32,120 Speaker 2: life I spent years bending over backwards to make visits happen. 838 00:38:32,680 --> 00:38:36,400 Speaker 2: Visits eventually stopped because he constantly dropped the ball. He 839 00:38:36,440 --> 00:38:38,680 Speaker 2: would drink when he had them, sometimes to the point 840 00:38:38,719 --> 00:38:40,759 Speaker 2: that the kids would call me scared or confused, and 841 00:38:40,840 --> 00:38:42,759 Speaker 2: I'd have to drive an hour each way to pick 842 00:38:42,840 --> 00:38:45,200 Speaker 2: them up while also trying to convince the kids that 843 00:38:45,320 --> 00:38:48,160 Speaker 2: this was all normal dad stuff. He acts like I 844 00:38:48,280 --> 00:38:50,400 Speaker 2: quote took the kids away even though he was barely 845 00:38:50,440 --> 00:38:53,840 Speaker 2: showing up. Meanwhile, our youngest is exploring her gender identity 846 00:38:53,920 --> 00:38:56,600 Speaker 2: now and he doesn't even know, so I'm stuck between 847 00:38:56,680 --> 00:38:59,160 Speaker 2: wanting to protect her privacy and feeling like I'm hiding 848 00:38:59,239 --> 00:39:01,440 Speaker 2: something huge about his own kid from a man who 849 00:39:01,520 --> 00:39:05,080 Speaker 2: hasn't exactly earned trust. As a bonus side quest, I 850 00:39:05,200 --> 00:39:07,359 Speaker 2: also have an ex fiance who I own a house 851 00:39:07,440 --> 00:39:10,200 Speaker 2: with which we're trying to untangle after a breakup. Through 852 00:39:10,239 --> 00:39:12,240 Speaker 2: all of this, I clearly have a history of choosing 853 00:39:12,280 --> 00:39:15,440 Speaker 2: bad partners, and the universe keeps handing me group projects. 854 00:39:16,239 --> 00:39:17,880 Speaker 2: Now I'm in the Midwest trying to build a good 855 00:39:17,920 --> 00:39:20,759 Speaker 2: life with my girlfriend who voted for Trump, so that's 856 00:39:20,800 --> 00:39:24,760 Speaker 2: already a fun plot twist, hey Be and our blended family. 857 00:39:25,120 --> 00:39:27,880 Speaker 2: I'm basically rebooting my life as this new version of me, 858 00:39:28,360 --> 00:39:30,520 Speaker 2: So I'd love your advice on how to be honest 859 00:39:30,560 --> 00:39:33,600 Speaker 2: with my kids dad about our child exploring their gender identity, 860 00:39:33,760 --> 00:39:36,520 Speaker 2: and do I start visits back up after eighteen months 861 00:39:36,560 --> 00:39:38,920 Speaker 2: of none? How many chances do you give out give 862 00:39:38,960 --> 00:39:41,239 Speaker 2: a checked out partner before you stop trying? And how 863 00:39:41,280 --> 00:39:43,880 Speaker 2: to balance starting over new career, new partner, and new 864 00:39:43,960 --> 00:39:46,359 Speaker 2: version of me with actually having time and energy left 865 00:39:46,400 --> 00:39:49,640 Speaker 2: for my kids. Thanks for reading and untangling this with me, McKinley. 866 00:39:49,920 --> 00:39:51,239 Speaker 1: Yeah, how manic. I think you should begin. 867 00:39:52,600 --> 00:39:57,160 Speaker 6: First of all, let me just say, McKinley, you're the 868 00:39:57,239 --> 00:40:00,239 Speaker 6: type of person I would fall in love with. I mean, oh, 869 00:40:00,719 --> 00:40:03,560 Speaker 6: like she falls in love with somebody every day every day. 870 00:40:03,719 --> 00:40:06,840 Speaker 6: But also like, no, no, no, no, because I know 871 00:40:06,960 --> 00:40:10,320 Speaker 6: what you're doing. You're looking for love, baby, and in 872 00:40:10,400 --> 00:40:12,920 Speaker 6: the process of looking for love, you keep going to 873 00:40:13,040 --> 00:40:15,760 Speaker 6: places that are just taking advantage of your spirit. 874 00:40:16,440 --> 00:40:20,120 Speaker 3: And I think it started with the Mormon Church, their garbage. 875 00:40:20,840 --> 00:40:23,319 Speaker 6: I think you know it also starts with you now 876 00:40:23,600 --> 00:40:26,080 Speaker 6: trying to You know, you're going into a world of 877 00:40:26,120 --> 00:40:28,560 Speaker 6: a new identity to the world and how the world 878 00:40:28,640 --> 00:40:31,400 Speaker 6: is seeing you. Then you have to have this partner 879 00:40:31,480 --> 00:40:33,560 Speaker 6: that you were in love with and with and had 880 00:40:33,680 --> 00:40:37,200 Speaker 6: children with, have to now discover this new identity who 881 00:40:37,320 --> 00:40:40,879 Speaker 6: you are. They're probably not processing it that well, which 882 00:40:40,920 --> 00:40:42,160 Speaker 6: is why you have this distance. 883 00:40:42,480 --> 00:40:44,239 Speaker 3: So that's another person abandoning you. 884 00:40:44,760 --> 00:40:46,799 Speaker 6: Then you're like, you don't want to see your daughter 885 00:40:46,920 --> 00:40:49,040 Speaker 6: go through the same thing because she's also trying to 886 00:40:49,080 --> 00:40:51,880 Speaker 6: figure out what her identity is. But I can guarantee 887 00:40:51,880 --> 00:40:54,759 Speaker 6: you that your former partner has no idea how to 888 00:40:54,880 --> 00:40:56,800 Speaker 6: help her at all, and if anything might be a 889 00:40:56,880 --> 00:41:01,320 Speaker 6: deterrent if after eight months eighteen months of not seeing 890 00:41:01,520 --> 00:41:05,400 Speaker 6: it is done for the children, right because they cannot 891 00:41:05,480 --> 00:41:09,760 Speaker 6: have this wishy washiness in their life, it is irresponsible 892 00:41:10,360 --> 00:41:13,960 Speaker 6: of that person. And then because it's irresponsible, you're safeguarding 893 00:41:14,040 --> 00:41:16,840 Speaker 6: your children, they have to kind of go no contact. 894 00:41:16,880 --> 00:41:20,120 Speaker 6: At this point, from my perspective, what I think you 895 00:41:20,280 --> 00:41:22,520 Speaker 6: need to do is you need to write down what 896 00:41:22,680 --> 00:41:26,759 Speaker 6: McKinley wants, what McKinley needs, so that you start going 897 00:41:26,840 --> 00:41:30,800 Speaker 6: towards partners that have that. Because how you got hooked 898 00:41:30,840 --> 00:41:33,840 Speaker 6: up with somebody who is a Trump supporter knowing that 899 00:41:34,040 --> 00:41:36,759 Speaker 6: everything that aligns with what you got going on is 900 00:41:36,960 --> 00:41:39,880 Speaker 6: anti Trump and the nonsense they have over there is 901 00:41:39,960 --> 00:41:42,840 Speaker 6: because you don't have enough safeguards around your spirits, and 902 00:41:43,000 --> 00:41:45,239 Speaker 6: you don't have enough boundaries in your life and you 903 00:41:45,440 --> 00:41:49,960 Speaker 6: don't love you first. Once you fix that, you don't 904 00:41:50,000 --> 00:41:52,120 Speaker 6: need our advice, and the rest of the shit is 905 00:41:52,160 --> 00:41:54,680 Speaker 6: gonna fall. You are a beautiful person, I can just 906 00:41:54,719 --> 00:41:56,839 Speaker 6: tell by your smile and spirit. Thank you so much 907 00:41:56,880 --> 00:41:58,759 Speaker 6: for writing this. In IF resonated with me in a 908 00:41:58,800 --> 00:42:02,080 Speaker 6: lot of ways because I feel abandoned a lot. I 909 00:42:02,280 --> 00:42:05,399 Speaker 6: felt unseen and unloved, and I kept running after people 910 00:42:05,719 --> 00:42:08,440 Speaker 6: who didn't love me because sometimes you think to yourself, 911 00:42:08,680 --> 00:42:10,680 Speaker 6: if I can get somebody who doesn't love me and 912 00:42:10,840 --> 00:42:13,920 Speaker 6: doesn't respect me to love me and respect me, I've 913 00:42:13,960 --> 00:42:17,200 Speaker 6: won a battle and you haven't. Okay, I hope that 914 00:42:17,440 --> 00:42:20,200 Speaker 6: resonates with you. I just want to leave that with you, 915 00:42:20,719 --> 00:42:22,560 Speaker 6: just in love, because I think it's more about you 916 00:42:22,840 --> 00:42:26,520 Speaker 6: than anything else. Once you get with you, everything else 917 00:42:26,640 --> 00:42:27,560 Speaker 6: is going to fall in place. 918 00:42:29,040 --> 00:42:31,600 Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, how is that falling on you? 919 00:42:31,760 --> 00:42:33,840 Speaker 10: McKinley, that's great advice. 920 00:42:34,000 --> 00:42:38,440 Speaker 11: My current girlfriend i'm with voted for Trump and she 921 00:42:38,760 --> 00:42:42,800 Speaker 11: actually is a really good person for me. 922 00:42:43,320 --> 00:42:46,239 Speaker 10: So my problem that I have with is not with 923 00:42:46,480 --> 00:42:47,520 Speaker 10: my current girlfriend. 924 00:42:48,000 --> 00:42:49,920 Speaker 3: No, no, no, but it should be. It should be. 925 00:42:50,120 --> 00:42:52,400 Speaker 6: Let me tell you why it should be right. We 926 00:42:52,560 --> 00:42:56,279 Speaker 6: have to be real about assessments. And I'll bring it 927 00:42:56,360 --> 00:42:58,560 Speaker 6: back to Chelsea and I the optics on this. And 928 00:42:58,600 --> 00:43:00,439 Speaker 6: I've said this before. I'm a black woman who talks 929 00:43:00,560 --> 00:43:03,080 Speaker 6: very crazy about white people. Don't trust white people, and 930 00:43:03,120 --> 00:43:05,480 Speaker 6: I shouldn't write the history of white people is gross. 931 00:43:06,160 --> 00:43:09,080 Speaker 3: But at the same time, it's like I wouldn't. 932 00:43:10,120 --> 00:43:13,719 Speaker 6: I'm not here to like dance and prance for somebody 933 00:43:14,000 --> 00:43:16,239 Speaker 6: because I want to be accepted and I want to 934 00:43:16,280 --> 00:43:18,920 Speaker 6: be loved. Like over here, I know that if some 935 00:43:19,000 --> 00:43:21,280 Speaker 6: shit's going down, even though I get on her nerves, 936 00:43:21,880 --> 00:43:24,439 Speaker 6: this woman has my back when it comes to being 937 00:43:24,480 --> 00:43:27,359 Speaker 6: a woman, a black woman, all of that support. If 938 00:43:27,440 --> 00:43:31,880 Speaker 6: she didn't, I could not be here. There's something in 939 00:43:32,000 --> 00:43:34,520 Speaker 6: you that you think is okay. You can't be with 940 00:43:34,600 --> 00:43:38,520 Speaker 6: the Trump supert. I'm just telling you, baby, everything you got. 941 00:43:38,600 --> 00:43:42,320 Speaker 6: You're a transman divorced. 942 00:43:43,120 --> 00:43:46,480 Speaker 3: You understand the fact that you think she's a good person. 943 00:43:46,560 --> 00:43:47,479 Speaker 3: She's a Da da da. 944 00:43:47,440 --> 00:43:50,040 Speaker 6: Dad, not in this time and climate, because there's got 945 00:43:50,120 --> 00:43:52,799 Speaker 6: to be something that she's got going on with her, 946 00:43:53,160 --> 00:43:55,360 Speaker 6: because how could she vote for Trump when Trump is 947 00:43:55,440 --> 00:43:55,880 Speaker 6: against you? 948 00:43:57,239 --> 00:43:57,439 Speaker 11: Right? 949 00:43:57,840 --> 00:43:59,880 Speaker 10: I get that sometimes you make mistakes and. 950 00:44:01,440 --> 00:44:02,680 Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah. 951 00:44:03,120 --> 00:44:05,399 Speaker 10: So when I had a phone call with her because 952 00:44:05,400 --> 00:44:06,520 Speaker 10: I met her online. 953 00:44:06,960 --> 00:44:09,920 Speaker 11: Two hours into the phone call was when I dropped 954 00:44:09,960 --> 00:44:12,960 Speaker 11: the whole Hey probably didn't realize I'm a trans mail 955 00:44:13,120 --> 00:44:17,279 Speaker 11: on my profile. And she said, at this point, I 956 00:44:17,320 --> 00:44:20,640 Speaker 11: would be a complete idiot to not give this a chance. 957 00:44:20,800 --> 00:44:25,160 Speaker 11: And that was about six months ago. So we just 958 00:44:25,239 --> 00:44:27,320 Speaker 11: started dating it in January. 959 00:44:27,880 --> 00:44:30,920 Speaker 6: No that baby, Listen to me, I say the same thing. 960 00:44:31,560 --> 00:44:33,919 Speaker 6: Everybody's lying. Okay, I'm not telling people. 961 00:44:33,920 --> 00:44:35,120 Speaker 3: I'm a comedian. I tell men. 962 00:44:35,239 --> 00:44:37,880 Speaker 6: I teach blind cats how to read. So the reality 963 00:44:38,040 --> 00:44:40,239 Speaker 6: is people are saying all kinds of shit. It's been 964 00:44:40,360 --> 00:44:43,680 Speaker 6: six months. She would be a fool right to adhere 965 00:44:43,760 --> 00:44:46,239 Speaker 6: to what she got going on to lose out on you. 966 00:44:46,440 --> 00:44:49,359 Speaker 6: But the reality is there's going to be a time 967 00:44:49,480 --> 00:44:52,759 Speaker 6: when she's gonna have to choose between you and what 968 00:44:53,000 --> 00:44:57,040 Speaker 6: she believes in. And I'm telling you, baby, that's dangerous 969 00:44:57,239 --> 00:44:58,719 Speaker 6: territory for you. 970 00:45:00,440 --> 00:45:03,800 Speaker 1: Okay, I hear, Yeah, Yeah, I agree with her. I 971 00:45:03,920 --> 00:45:04,160 Speaker 1: think that. 972 00:45:04,360 --> 00:45:04,560 Speaker 7: Yeah. 973 00:45:04,680 --> 00:45:07,960 Speaker 1: You it's like you have a pattern of behavior that's 974 00:45:08,280 --> 00:45:11,000 Speaker 1: like a pathology, and you kind of have to nip 975 00:45:11,080 --> 00:45:13,840 Speaker 1: it in the bud, like you're not looking after yourself. 976 00:45:13,920 --> 00:45:17,920 Speaker 1: That's why it's like a repetition of kind of bad choices. 977 00:45:18,760 --> 00:45:21,440 Speaker 2: Well, and I get why it feels comfortable right, because 978 00:45:21,440 --> 00:45:24,759 Speaker 2: it's like, you know, you're coming out of this previous relationship. 979 00:45:24,880 --> 00:45:27,200 Speaker 2: Things are tumultuous with work and with your ex and 980 00:45:27,239 --> 00:45:29,520 Speaker 2: all these things, but or x is and all these things, 981 00:45:29,600 --> 00:45:32,239 Speaker 2: but this feels comfortable, right, Like this feels like. 982 00:45:32,280 --> 00:45:34,640 Speaker 1: A like a cozy, safe space where you were held. 983 00:45:34,680 --> 00:45:37,640 Speaker 2: But I do think that Yamanika is right, Like when 984 00:45:37,680 --> 00:45:40,680 Speaker 2: it comes down to her choosing between her church that 985 00:45:40,719 --> 00:45:45,080 Speaker 2: has very conservative views like her beliefs, and her relationship 986 00:45:45,160 --> 00:45:46,640 Speaker 2: with you, I think there's going to be a. 987 00:45:46,680 --> 00:45:47,680 Speaker 3: Dividing point there. 988 00:45:48,200 --> 00:45:51,200 Speaker 2: But I want to also go back to what Yamanika 989 00:45:51,280 --> 00:45:55,560 Speaker 2: was saying about how we fill the void that's happening 990 00:45:55,719 --> 00:45:59,520 Speaker 2: for you and how we get McKinley to love McKinley 991 00:46:00,160 --> 00:46:02,520 Speaker 2: so that you can stand on your own two feet. 992 00:46:03,760 --> 00:46:06,800 Speaker 2: And are you in any kind of therapy seeing anybody 993 00:46:07,040 --> 00:46:07,800 Speaker 2: in that capacity? 994 00:46:08,920 --> 00:46:12,279 Speaker 11: I was in therapy, and I was on medicine, and 995 00:46:12,680 --> 00:46:16,439 Speaker 11: I work at a company that doesn't provide very good 996 00:46:17,120 --> 00:46:20,319 Speaker 11: insurance coverage, so I have to wait until next month 997 00:46:20,440 --> 00:46:21,640 Speaker 11: to start therapy again. 998 00:46:22,160 --> 00:46:22,480 Speaker 3: Mary J. 999 00:46:22,640 --> 00:46:26,440 Speaker 6: Blige has a song called good Morning gorgeous, right, yes, 1000 00:46:26,800 --> 00:46:28,920 Speaker 6: And it's like at first I was like, this is 1001 00:46:28,960 --> 00:46:31,640 Speaker 6: so ridiculous, you know, like you got to do this, 1002 00:46:32,400 --> 00:46:34,840 Speaker 6: But I started getting into that song and it's like 1003 00:46:35,560 --> 00:46:38,239 Speaker 6: you need to get up in the morning and say 1004 00:46:38,280 --> 00:46:39,920 Speaker 6: good morning gorgeous to yourself. 1005 00:46:40,200 --> 00:46:41,400 Speaker 3: I can see it all. 1006 00:46:41,360 --> 00:46:43,880 Speaker 6: Over you, and not as a judgment, it's because I 1007 00:46:44,040 --> 00:46:46,680 Speaker 6: am like that too. This is like really sensitive and 1008 00:46:46,760 --> 00:46:48,879 Speaker 6: you're trying to hold it all in but it's hurting 1009 00:46:48,920 --> 00:46:50,520 Speaker 6: you at the same time. And as long as you're 1010 00:46:50,600 --> 00:46:53,279 Speaker 6: okay and acquiesced to the bullshit around you, you think 1011 00:46:53,360 --> 00:46:58,720 Speaker 6: you'll be safe, but you won't. You're a great person, amazing, 1012 00:46:58,760 --> 00:47:01,000 Speaker 6: like just from the presence of you. I want you 1013 00:47:01,080 --> 00:47:03,080 Speaker 6: to know that, and I don't know if you see 1014 00:47:03,160 --> 00:47:07,800 Speaker 6: that in you and you got to, baby, you have to. 1015 00:47:08,200 --> 00:47:08,680 Speaker 10: I'm trying. 1016 00:47:09,000 --> 00:47:10,080 Speaker 3: No, you really do. 1017 00:47:10,480 --> 00:47:13,120 Speaker 6: Immediately when I saw you on the screen, I said, wow, 1018 00:47:14,120 --> 00:47:15,160 Speaker 6: just so beautiful. 1019 00:47:15,560 --> 00:47:15,840 Speaker 3: Really. 1020 00:47:16,080 --> 00:47:18,879 Speaker 11: I tried so hard, and I've been trying to ask 1021 00:47:18,960 --> 00:47:21,719 Speaker 11: for help. It's like I get nine yards out of 1022 00:47:21,760 --> 00:47:24,200 Speaker 11: the ten yards and I can't freaking get that one yard. 1023 00:47:24,200 --> 00:47:27,040 Speaker 11: And it's like I try to ask help for everywhere 1024 00:47:27,040 --> 00:47:29,160 Speaker 11: and try to figure things out and I'm just so 1025 00:47:29,360 --> 00:47:31,360 Speaker 11: financially screwed trying. 1026 00:47:31,560 --> 00:47:33,080 Speaker 10: You know, it's just like how do you do all 1027 00:47:33,120 --> 00:47:33,520 Speaker 10: these things? 1028 00:47:33,560 --> 00:47:33,719 Speaker 4: You know? 1029 00:47:33,800 --> 00:47:34,400 Speaker 10: How do you like? 1030 00:47:34,560 --> 00:47:37,279 Speaker 11: I have all this paths I'm trying to protect and 1031 00:47:37,400 --> 00:47:39,799 Speaker 11: protect my future and trying to do so many things. 1032 00:47:39,840 --> 00:47:43,560 Speaker 10: It's just so hard. Oh sorry, No, you're okay. 1033 00:47:43,880 --> 00:47:46,279 Speaker 3: We're also going through this city, you know what I mean. 1034 00:47:46,400 --> 00:47:49,880 Speaker 6: Like I cried, Chelsea cries, you know, We've cried to 1035 00:47:49,960 --> 00:47:52,360 Speaker 6: each other, like You're not alone in this feeling. 1036 00:47:52,400 --> 00:47:53,560 Speaker 3: It feels so isolating. 1037 00:47:53,640 --> 00:47:57,839 Speaker 6: But I promise you and I understand finances, God knows 1038 00:47:57,960 --> 00:47:59,399 Speaker 6: you know, and I understand all those things. 1039 00:47:59,480 --> 00:48:01,799 Speaker 3: They can change the fabric of your life. 1040 00:48:01,880 --> 00:48:04,400 Speaker 6: But the first thing you have to do is you 1041 00:48:04,719 --> 00:48:07,800 Speaker 6: have to love you and really know that all the 1042 00:48:07,880 --> 00:48:10,520 Speaker 6: decisions of that happen in your life have to be 1043 00:48:10,600 --> 00:48:13,000 Speaker 6: because they are going to benefit McKinley. Do you understand, 1044 00:48:13,360 --> 00:48:15,799 Speaker 6: because if not, if finance is not going to get good, 1045 00:48:15,960 --> 00:48:17,960 Speaker 6: the relationship is not going to get good. You're going 1046 00:48:18,000 --> 00:48:21,000 Speaker 6: to keep chasing things that don't serve you because, like 1047 00:48:21,200 --> 00:48:24,160 Speaker 6: Catherine said, you just want to be comfortable, but you're 1048 00:48:24,360 --> 00:48:26,200 Speaker 6: unfortunately comfortable in trauma. 1049 00:48:26,719 --> 00:48:28,560 Speaker 10: I think I'm just like in survival mode. 1050 00:48:28,719 --> 00:48:32,160 Speaker 2: I'm just trying to just I mean, individual therapy isn't 1051 00:48:32,160 --> 00:48:34,560 Speaker 2: something that can happen right now for financial or any 1052 00:48:34,600 --> 00:48:37,239 Speaker 2: other reasons. Let's find you a support group in your 1053 00:48:37,280 --> 00:48:39,719 Speaker 2: area so that you have some outlet for this, Like 1054 00:48:40,120 --> 00:48:44,520 Speaker 2: we need weekly support right right. You don't have to 1055 00:48:44,560 --> 00:48:46,200 Speaker 2: do this alone, and we don't want you to. 1056 00:48:46,239 --> 00:48:49,440 Speaker 10: Do this alone. Thank you, Yeah, thank you. I appreciate it. 1057 00:48:49,680 --> 00:48:51,719 Speaker 2: Yeah, And Chelsea, what would you say as far as 1058 00:48:51,760 --> 00:48:53,640 Speaker 2: like if there's a step that McKinley can take every 1059 00:48:53,680 --> 00:48:56,040 Speaker 2: single day to just get in touch with himself and 1060 00:48:56,200 --> 00:48:58,000 Speaker 2: listen to himself, what would. 1061 00:48:57,920 --> 00:48:59,799 Speaker 1: Yeah, you should get up in the mornings and write 1062 00:48:59,840 --> 00:49:05,120 Speaker 1: down like you are magnificent, you are magnetic, and you 1063 00:49:05,440 --> 00:49:08,359 Speaker 1: are resilient, and like write those three things down each 1064 00:49:08,480 --> 00:49:11,640 Speaker 1: morning and you're you know, on a piece of paper 1065 00:49:12,160 --> 00:49:13,640 Speaker 1: and start saying that to yourself. 1066 00:49:15,160 --> 00:49:17,680 Speaker 10: Okay, that was magnificent, resilient. What was the second one? 1067 00:49:18,640 --> 00:49:19,160 Speaker 1: Magnetic? 1068 00:49:19,960 --> 00:49:20,440 Speaker 10: Magnetic? 1069 00:49:20,520 --> 00:49:22,759 Speaker 3: Thank you? And also go find your own words. I 1070 00:49:22,760 --> 00:49:24,560 Speaker 3: wouldn't be writing too many things down that she says. 1071 00:49:25,600 --> 00:49:28,600 Speaker 3: You know what, Chelsea is my god, so I will 1072 00:49:28,800 --> 00:49:31,320 Speaker 3: listen mad decisions again. 1073 00:49:32,800 --> 00:49:33,600 Speaker 1: Hey, I'm your god. 1074 00:49:33,680 --> 00:49:43,799 Speaker 3: To honey, I wish the little but Jesus Christ, all 1075 00:49:43,840 --> 00:49:45,759 Speaker 3: of us did. You wouldn't even cross the street to 1076 00:49:45,840 --> 00:49:46,640 Speaker 3: get me a hot. 1077 00:49:50,800 --> 00:49:57,480 Speaker 1: Lordo's you're nos, LORDO. 1078 00:49:57,880 --> 00:49:58,560 Speaker 3: That is correct. 1079 00:49:59,640 --> 00:49:59,839 Speaker 1: Lord. 1080 00:50:00,520 --> 00:50:03,520 Speaker 10: I served them, I served a mission and had to 1081 00:50:03,600 --> 00:50:04,520 Speaker 10: learn Spanish. 1082 00:50:04,640 --> 00:50:05,120 Speaker 7: It could be. 1083 00:50:09,960 --> 00:50:12,839 Speaker 2: Will you check in with me, let me know if 1084 00:50:12,880 --> 00:50:14,479 Speaker 2: you can find something in your marrea. 1085 00:50:14,600 --> 00:50:15,560 Speaker 8: If not, I'm going to help you. 1086 00:50:15,680 --> 00:50:17,400 Speaker 1: Look like that. 1087 00:50:17,480 --> 00:50:20,200 Speaker 3: You can have a group every week. 1088 00:50:21,600 --> 00:50:24,080 Speaker 2: But will you check in with me like pretty quickly 1089 00:50:24,200 --> 00:50:25,759 Speaker 2: and well we'll get you on the right track. 1090 00:50:26,080 --> 00:50:27,040 Speaker 1: Thanks for calling. 1091 00:50:28,520 --> 00:50:29,120 Speaker 7: You so much. 1092 00:50:29,520 --> 00:50:34,480 Speaker 3: We do love you, love you, love you. Of course. 1093 00:50:39,239 --> 00:50:40,200 Speaker 1: I do have one more collar. 1094 00:50:40,360 --> 00:50:41,080 Speaker 8: If you're ready. 1095 00:50:42,480 --> 00:50:43,160 Speaker 3: To help it, let's go. 1096 00:50:43,320 --> 00:50:47,479 Speaker 1: Let's okay. 1097 00:50:47,520 --> 00:50:50,720 Speaker 2: Our last caller is Katie and she says, you're Chelsea. 1098 00:50:51,160 --> 00:50:53,360 Speaker 2: I need advice for how to deal with my sister. 1099 00:50:53,600 --> 00:50:55,759 Speaker 2: We're both in our fifties and a year apart. We 1100 00:50:55,880 --> 00:50:57,799 Speaker 2: were very close as children, but we went in very 1101 00:50:57,840 --> 00:51:01,480 Speaker 2: different directions directions as adults. That said, we still live 1102 00:51:01,480 --> 00:51:02,920 Speaker 2: in the town where we grew up, and we're both 1103 00:51:02,960 --> 00:51:06,080 Speaker 2: close with our mother and extended family. Here's the problem. 1104 00:51:06,320 --> 00:51:09,600 Speaker 2: There was no inciting event, but over the last several years, 1105 00:51:09,680 --> 00:51:12,040 Speaker 2: maybe even going back to our early thirties. We're like 1106 00:51:12,120 --> 00:51:15,720 Speaker 2: oil and water. We tolerate each other, but there's constant tension. 1107 00:51:16,160 --> 00:51:17,960 Speaker 2: I know I'm not perfect, but it feels like she's 1108 00:51:18,120 --> 00:51:21,760 Speaker 2: constantly sniping at me, criticizing me, being negative, and cutting 1109 00:51:21,840 --> 00:51:24,320 Speaker 2: me down. I've been sober for almost three years, and 1110 00:51:24,360 --> 00:51:27,320 Speaker 2: I'm committed to live and let live toward life in general. 1111 00:51:27,600 --> 00:51:29,479 Speaker 2: I try to tune her out and be the bigger person, 1112 00:51:29,520 --> 00:51:32,160 Speaker 2: but gets harder every time I see her. We just 1113 00:51:32,200 --> 00:51:34,080 Speaker 2: spent the weekend traveling with our eighty year old mom 1114 00:51:34,200 --> 00:51:36,280 Speaker 2: for our family event, and I'm ready to never speak 1115 00:51:36,320 --> 00:51:38,600 Speaker 2: to her again. But that would break my mom's heart, 1116 00:51:38,600 --> 00:51:40,799 Speaker 2: which is out of the question. I also don't want 1117 00:51:40,840 --> 00:51:43,000 Speaker 2: to lose my only sister, but maybe I already have. 1118 00:51:43,560 --> 00:51:45,880 Speaker 2: I know you've been through a lot with your extended family, Chelsea, 1119 00:51:45,960 --> 00:51:47,959 Speaker 2: so any thoughts. I appreciate you and your team. 1120 00:51:48,200 --> 00:51:53,120 Speaker 1: Katie. Hi, Hi, Hi, Hi, Hi? How are you o? 1121 00:51:53,360 --> 00:51:55,279 Speaker 8: Katie Gat It's so exciting to be here. 1122 00:51:55,640 --> 00:51:57,200 Speaker 1: Hi, this is Yamy, I have you. 1123 00:51:57,440 --> 00:51:57,560 Speaker 11: Hi. 1124 00:51:57,640 --> 00:51:58,880 Speaker 3: I'm Yaminika Katie. 1125 00:51:59,160 --> 00:51:59,920 Speaker 1: Oh, oh my god. 1126 00:52:00,000 --> 00:52:02,080 Speaker 7: I'll try to watch my mouth in your presence. 1127 00:52:02,160 --> 00:52:03,239 Speaker 10: I know how sensitive you. 1128 00:52:03,320 --> 00:52:06,520 Speaker 3: Are, baby, so look at cutie pye, you try to 1129 00:52:06,560 --> 00:52:07,160 Speaker 3: be my sister? 1130 00:52:07,760 --> 00:52:11,080 Speaker 1: Well wait, what's the situations? Why can't you get? 1131 00:52:11,280 --> 00:52:11,320 Speaker 7: What? 1132 00:52:11,560 --> 00:52:13,520 Speaker 1: Is she so annoying and you're so annoying to her? 1133 00:52:14,440 --> 00:52:16,879 Speaker 1: You both hate each other like annoy each other kind 1134 00:52:16,920 --> 00:52:20,080 Speaker 1: of Yeah, are you angry at her about something? 1135 00:52:20,840 --> 00:52:23,160 Speaker 7: After this trip that we went on, my husband said 1136 00:52:23,200 --> 00:52:25,080 Speaker 7: the only solution he saw was that we go in. 1137 00:52:25,080 --> 00:52:26,520 Speaker 10: The backyard with boxing gloves. 1138 00:52:26,760 --> 00:52:31,560 Speaker 6: Oh all right, Well there's a resentment somewhere. Where's the resentment? 1139 00:52:32,360 --> 00:52:32,960 Speaker 7: I don't know. 1140 00:52:33,480 --> 00:52:36,240 Speaker 10: I mean, I could, I could make some guesses. 1141 00:52:36,360 --> 00:52:39,040 Speaker 7: I mean, I think that our lives have turned out. 1142 00:52:39,480 --> 00:52:42,359 Speaker 7: You know, our lives have turned out basically the way 1143 00:52:42,400 --> 00:52:44,640 Speaker 7: that we wanted them to. You know, I always wanted 1144 00:52:44,680 --> 00:52:46,919 Speaker 7: to be a career person, and I am. My sister 1145 00:52:47,280 --> 00:52:49,080 Speaker 7: is a stay at home mom, and she loves her 1146 00:52:49,160 --> 00:52:52,080 Speaker 7: kids and she loves that. But it seems like I 1147 00:52:52,160 --> 00:52:54,399 Speaker 7: think she resents the freedom that I have. I mean, 1148 00:52:54,440 --> 00:52:56,080 Speaker 7: if I had to guess, i'd say what that is? 1149 00:52:56,200 --> 00:52:58,640 Speaker 7: But it's so hard to have an honest conversation with 1150 00:52:58,760 --> 00:53:00,680 Speaker 7: her that I'm speculating when I say that. 1151 00:53:01,120 --> 00:53:03,879 Speaker 1: So, what's your issue with her? 1152 00:53:05,480 --> 00:53:08,400 Speaker 7: It's just it's the constant cutdowns, It's the constant. 1153 00:53:08,440 --> 00:53:10,080 Speaker 1: It's just she's cutting down. 1154 00:53:11,040 --> 00:53:14,600 Speaker 6: Yeah, I mean she's trying to belittle you because I 1155 00:53:14,680 --> 00:53:17,520 Speaker 6: think I don't think she probably is as happy as 1156 00:53:17,600 --> 00:53:20,839 Speaker 6: you think she is or satisfied. Right. I think I'm 1157 00:53:20,840 --> 00:53:23,239 Speaker 6: not a mother and I've never been able to fool 1158 00:53:23,280 --> 00:53:25,600 Speaker 6: a man into marrying me. But I can tell you 1159 00:53:25,800 --> 00:53:29,800 Speaker 6: this that there is a sense of accomplishment quite early 1160 00:53:29,960 --> 00:53:33,360 Speaker 6: once you go into relationship that probably goes into marriage 1161 00:53:33,719 --> 00:53:36,360 Speaker 6: and then children, and then after that you have to 1162 00:53:36,400 --> 00:53:39,120 Speaker 6: look at yourself and go what's next. That's something that 1163 00:53:39,280 --> 00:53:41,520 Speaker 6: you don't have to worry about as a career woman, 1164 00:53:41,600 --> 00:53:44,319 Speaker 6: because what next is the career thing. You haven't really 1165 00:53:44,480 --> 00:53:47,919 Speaker 6: locked down life. People are locking down life early seeing 1166 00:53:48,000 --> 00:53:50,680 Speaker 6: people do an evolve beyond where they've stopped. 1167 00:53:50,960 --> 00:53:52,040 Speaker 3: And then there's a resentment. 1168 00:53:52,160 --> 00:53:55,040 Speaker 6: So because she feels bad about what you got going 1169 00:53:55,080 --> 00:53:57,600 Speaker 6: on in the freedom you got, she wants to cut 1170 00:53:57,680 --> 00:53:59,239 Speaker 6: you down and make you feel the same as her. 1171 00:53:59,800 --> 00:54:05,680 Speaker 6: You cannot be in a relationship like that without communicating. Hey, listen, 1172 00:54:05,800 --> 00:54:07,960 Speaker 6: I don't like when you say this. I don't like 1173 00:54:08,040 --> 00:54:09,759 Speaker 6: when you say that it makes me feel this way. 1174 00:54:09,800 --> 00:54:12,040 Speaker 6: If they love you enough and respect you enough, then 1175 00:54:12,120 --> 00:54:14,320 Speaker 6: they will hear it. If they don't, then you just 1176 00:54:14,440 --> 00:54:17,880 Speaker 6: have to separate. But you can't force your sister to 1177 00:54:17,960 --> 00:54:20,440 Speaker 6: have a conversation with you. If she doesn't want to 1178 00:54:20,480 --> 00:54:22,839 Speaker 6: have a conversation with you, and if she's not going 1179 00:54:22,920 --> 00:54:25,680 Speaker 6: to talk or communicate her real feelings to you, then 1180 00:54:25,719 --> 00:54:28,600 Speaker 6: you have to either limit contact or go no contact. 1181 00:54:28,960 --> 00:54:31,680 Speaker 1: When she's cutting you down, what's your reaction to that? 1182 00:54:32,760 --> 00:54:35,759 Speaker 7: I just I kind of go gray rock, you know. 1183 00:54:36,080 --> 00:54:40,960 Speaker 7: I just I associate. Yeah, honestly, sometimes I sometimes I 1184 00:54:41,040 --> 00:54:43,200 Speaker 7: try to change the subject. It just depends on who 1185 00:54:43,239 --> 00:54:46,520 Speaker 7: else is around us. Very rarely is it just her 1186 00:54:46,640 --> 00:54:48,799 Speaker 7: and I, because I don't spend time with her unless 1187 00:54:48,920 --> 00:54:51,400 Speaker 7: I really have to because of the larger family, and 1188 00:54:51,719 --> 00:54:54,680 Speaker 7: I don't want to be rude or cause a you know, 1189 00:54:54,800 --> 00:54:59,359 Speaker 7: a big family kerfuffle by telling her. You know you're 1190 00:54:59,400 --> 00:55:01,480 Speaker 7: being rude, being a jerk. Can you stop? You know, 1191 00:55:01,680 --> 00:55:04,120 Speaker 7: it just feels so impossible to me because of the 1192 00:55:04,520 --> 00:55:05,760 Speaker 7: larger family dynamic. 1193 00:55:06,600 --> 00:55:08,520 Speaker 6: Let me ask you something, when you get angry, do 1194 00:55:08,600 --> 00:55:11,080 Speaker 6: you really like is it uncontrollable anger? 1195 00:55:14,760 --> 00:55:20,120 Speaker 7: I'm I'm an enneagram one, if that makes any sense. 1196 00:55:20,160 --> 00:55:23,560 Speaker 7: I'm a you know, the perfectionist type that just internalizes. 1197 00:55:23,160 --> 00:55:25,319 Speaker 1: What's your star signs? Should that'll make sense to her? 1198 00:55:25,520 --> 00:55:26,960 Speaker 3: No, that's not what I'm saying to you. 1199 00:55:27,200 --> 00:55:28,800 Speaker 6: Is what I do a lot, and it gets me 1200 00:55:28,880 --> 00:55:33,719 Speaker 6: in problems, right, is because I know, like, once you 1201 00:55:33,920 --> 00:55:36,040 Speaker 6: piss me off, once I've gotten pissed off and I've 1202 00:55:36,080 --> 00:55:39,960 Speaker 6: gone beyond, there's no I'm I'm getting ready to get 1203 00:55:39,960 --> 00:55:43,000 Speaker 6: with your ass in a really wild way. Right And 1204 00:55:43,320 --> 00:55:45,840 Speaker 6: probably when I'm done getting with you, we're gonna have 1205 00:55:46,000 --> 00:55:48,400 Speaker 6: to sever tize unless you can emotionally get over the 1206 00:55:48,480 --> 00:55:51,000 Speaker 6: fact that I just ran you into the ground. So 1207 00:55:51,120 --> 00:55:53,680 Speaker 6: a lot of times I try to avoid those situations 1208 00:55:53,760 --> 00:55:56,800 Speaker 6: by being the nicer person, the bigger person, or the 1209 00:55:56,960 --> 00:56:00,400 Speaker 6: ah you know, and over time that bill up and 1210 00:56:00,480 --> 00:56:03,759 Speaker 6: it's frustrating to you because it's like you're going great 1211 00:56:03,840 --> 00:56:04,600 Speaker 6: rock all the time. 1212 00:56:04,680 --> 00:56:08,040 Speaker 3: Why your sister going hot lava? You need to get 1213 00:56:08,080 --> 00:56:10,680 Speaker 3: with her in these moments. You need to be like, hey, bitch, 1214 00:56:10,719 --> 00:56:13,759 Speaker 3: hold on a second, why are you talking crazy to 1215 00:56:13,880 --> 00:56:16,480 Speaker 3: me like that? What's up? What have I done? No, 1216 00:56:16,640 --> 00:56:19,120 Speaker 3: because as long as you allow it, it's going to 1217 00:56:19,239 --> 00:56:19,800 Speaker 3: get done that. 1218 00:56:20,280 --> 00:56:23,040 Speaker 1: I agree. I think like you have to face it honestly, 1219 00:56:23,320 --> 00:56:25,440 Speaker 1: like and and even if she can't be honest. You 1220 00:56:25,600 --> 00:56:27,640 Speaker 1: have to get her to be honest, like you have 1221 00:56:27,760 --> 00:56:30,200 Speaker 1: to be like, listen, this is ridiculous. We hate each other. 1222 00:56:30,360 --> 00:56:32,640 Speaker 1: Why do we hate each other? Let's talk about it? 1223 00:56:32,800 --> 00:56:34,759 Speaker 1: Would you rather? I would like to figure this out. 1224 00:56:34,880 --> 00:56:38,239 Speaker 1: Let's figure this out together, Like what what can I do? 1225 00:56:38,760 --> 00:56:41,000 Speaker 1: I'll do anything to have as a normal relation. Do 1226 00:56:41,080 --> 00:56:43,200 Speaker 1: you fucking hate me? Like you have to have like 1227 00:56:43,320 --> 00:56:45,879 Speaker 1: a moment of real honesty to get cause you guys 1228 00:56:45,920 --> 00:56:49,399 Speaker 1: then can actually break all the tension and come together. Yeah, 1229 00:56:49,760 --> 00:56:54,040 Speaker 1: sorry that I'm yelling. Okay, yeah, yeah, so. 1230 00:56:54,120 --> 00:56:57,480 Speaker 3: That she was passionate. She was talking about her and I. 1231 00:56:57,640 --> 00:57:00,279 Speaker 3: That's how we we also these sisters. Did you write this? 1232 00:57:00,360 --> 00:57:03,160 Speaker 1: Let in tell he shut up? Shut up? 1233 00:57:03,760 --> 00:57:03,960 Speaker 10: Oh? 1234 00:57:05,239 --> 00:57:06,759 Speaker 1: But yeah, but I also can't. 1235 00:57:06,880 --> 00:57:08,400 Speaker 7: I can't dime out Chelsea like that. 1236 00:57:08,680 --> 00:57:11,840 Speaker 1: But but also I feel like there can't be like 1237 00:57:12,200 --> 00:57:15,640 Speaker 1: tension without two people having the tension, you know what 1238 00:57:15,719 --> 00:57:18,480 Speaker 1: I mean? Like, if you can't, there has to be 1239 00:57:18,600 --> 00:57:21,680 Speaker 1: something coming from you too. That is like an explosive energy, 1240 00:57:22,000 --> 00:57:25,120 Speaker 1: and that's why it should. It needs to combust, you know, 1241 00:57:25,360 --> 00:57:28,360 Speaker 1: Like you can't dance when somebody's not dancing. Yeah, I 1242 00:57:28,440 --> 00:57:30,760 Speaker 1: mean I can't. Actually that's The only time I should 1243 00:57:30,800 --> 00:57:32,920 Speaker 1: be dancing is when no one else is dancing. 1244 00:57:39,080 --> 00:57:39,240 Speaker 3: Yo. 1245 00:57:39,520 --> 00:57:42,120 Speaker 6: But you seem like you're in this thing by yourself, 1246 00:57:42,840 --> 00:57:45,360 Speaker 6: and Chelsea's right, you got to engage you assistant in 1247 00:57:45,480 --> 00:57:48,000 Speaker 6: it because she also has to feel uncomfortable. 1248 00:57:48,200 --> 00:57:50,240 Speaker 3: And you think she writing a letter somewhere about what 1249 00:57:50,440 --> 00:57:52,120 Speaker 3: you got. You know she's not writing a letter. 1250 00:57:52,200 --> 00:57:54,200 Speaker 6: She over did baker cookies for your nieces and nephews 1251 00:57:54,480 --> 00:57:56,080 Speaker 6: and you over here trying to figure out how you're 1252 00:57:56,080 --> 00:57:58,480 Speaker 6: going to get your situation back with your sister. You guys, 1253 00:57:58,520 --> 00:58:01,400 Speaker 6: are sisters that that's important to you or it's not. 1254 00:58:01,720 --> 00:58:04,680 Speaker 6: If it is, then some egos are gonna have to shift, 1255 00:58:04,920 --> 00:58:07,680 Speaker 6: some conversations are going to have to happen, and hopefully 1256 00:58:07,720 --> 00:58:09,960 Speaker 6: at the end of it, you guys remain sisters and 1257 00:58:10,040 --> 00:58:11,360 Speaker 6: building a better relationship. 1258 00:58:11,760 --> 00:58:13,600 Speaker 2: Yeah, and I think the time to have this conversation 1259 00:58:13,720 --> 00:58:16,240 Speaker 2: is not at first. She's just said something that activates you. 1260 00:58:16,560 --> 00:58:19,720 Speaker 2: But like before you go into time with your mom 1261 00:58:19,960 --> 00:58:21,840 Speaker 2: or whatever, I can let me. 1262 00:58:21,920 --> 00:58:22,240 Speaker 3: Just say this. 1263 00:58:22,880 --> 00:58:25,720 Speaker 6: I say wait till she because then she know who 1264 00:58:26,000 --> 00:58:29,479 Speaker 6: Because I'm for real. If you do this, bitch, every 1265 00:58:29,560 --> 00:58:33,760 Speaker 6: time you do this, you activate this. You understand you 1266 00:58:33,840 --> 00:58:37,240 Speaker 6: start training you do this? Did I become this? 1267 00:58:37,800 --> 00:58:39,800 Speaker 3: Right? I have the conversation with her here. 1268 00:58:39,800 --> 00:58:41,560 Speaker 6: If you want to keep meeting me here, bitch, I'm 1269 00:58:41,560 --> 00:58:44,160 Speaker 6: available to meet you here at this Sorry to keep going. 1270 00:58:44,160 --> 00:58:45,880 Speaker 3: Your sister bitch, what are y'all's a bitch? 1271 00:58:46,720 --> 00:58:48,640 Speaker 7: But you know what? 1272 00:58:48,960 --> 00:58:51,160 Speaker 3: Right for sure? What he is a bitch? I don't know. 1273 00:58:51,200 --> 00:58:53,120 Speaker 3: We got to hear your sister's story. Maybe she'll right 1274 00:58:53,120 --> 00:58:53,720 Speaker 3: there next week. 1275 00:58:54,320 --> 00:58:57,840 Speaker 6: But what I'm telling you is the reality is every 1276 00:58:57,960 --> 00:59:00,720 Speaker 6: time she's like this, you got to give her the 1277 00:59:00,840 --> 00:59:03,959 Speaker 6: results of what that is, so that at some point 1278 00:59:04,040 --> 00:59:06,200 Speaker 6: she probably go, whoa, hey, can we talk? 1279 00:59:06,320 --> 00:59:08,480 Speaker 3: She might be coming to you to talk because if 1280 00:59:08,560 --> 00:59:10,280 Speaker 3: you're gonna be a warm, bad bitch, so am I. 1281 00:59:10,720 --> 00:59:13,000 Speaker 7: That would shock her so badly because I think everyone 1282 00:59:13,040 --> 00:59:14,960 Speaker 7: in my family is so used to me being. 1283 00:59:14,880 --> 00:59:18,280 Speaker 3: Like, uh, you know, just so non reactive. Yeah, yeah, 1284 00:59:18,280 --> 00:59:19,520 Speaker 3: that's how I do. And she's not. 1285 00:59:19,800 --> 00:59:21,600 Speaker 2: She's not saying this stuff to you to knock at 1286 00:59:21,640 --> 00:59:24,120 Speaker 2: a reaction. She might be surprised at a reaction, but 1287 00:59:24,240 --> 00:59:26,280 Speaker 2: she's saying it to go do you. I mean, even 1288 00:59:26,320 --> 00:59:29,400 Speaker 2: if it's something as simple as like she says something shitdn' 1289 00:59:29,400 --> 00:59:31,919 Speaker 2: hear like wow, I can't believe you felt comfortable saying 1290 00:59:31,960 --> 00:59:33,960 Speaker 2: that to me, or I can't believe you felt it 1291 00:59:34,040 --> 00:59:34,480 Speaker 2: was okay to. 1292 00:59:34,480 --> 00:59:36,480 Speaker 3: Say I can't believe it's not butter bitch. 1293 00:59:36,560 --> 00:59:38,680 Speaker 6: But I'm telling you right now, is the next time 1294 00:59:38,760 --> 00:59:42,040 Speaker 6: you say something wild to me, I'm all over the place. 1295 00:59:42,320 --> 00:59:45,000 Speaker 3: You have the profile of a serial killer. 1296 00:59:45,040 --> 00:59:49,680 Speaker 6: You're the sayd serial killers, laid, dormant, nothing, doing nothing. 1297 00:59:49,800 --> 00:59:52,600 Speaker 6: They also running businesses and bacon cookies and shit, and 1298 00:59:52,720 --> 00:59:55,240 Speaker 6: then one day you're gonna flip out. I make sure 1299 00:59:55,280 --> 00:59:57,439 Speaker 6: it redect my address from anything that might. 1300 00:59:57,360 --> 00:59:58,160 Speaker 3: Be on any paperwork. 1301 00:59:58,200 --> 01:00:00,440 Speaker 6: If you're not gonna come kill me for giving you advice, 1302 01:00:00,440 --> 01:00:01,720 Speaker 6: I can tell you where Chelsea lives. 1303 01:00:02,800 --> 01:00:09,040 Speaker 1: Actually, I have to move because you stayed here. Oh 1304 01:00:09,120 --> 01:00:09,640 Speaker 1: that's the thing. 1305 01:00:09,680 --> 01:00:10,400 Speaker 10: They gotta move. 1306 01:00:13,200 --> 01:00:15,840 Speaker 7: I have considered from time to time saying to her, 1307 01:00:16,200 --> 01:00:17,280 Speaker 7: you know, I'm sorry. 1308 01:00:17,440 --> 01:00:18,400 Speaker 1: Could you repeat that? 1309 01:00:19,640 --> 01:00:23,160 Speaker 7: She could actually hear herself say like, that's. 1310 01:00:23,000 --> 01:00:25,160 Speaker 1: A good first step. Could you repeat that, that's a 1311 01:00:25,200 --> 01:00:27,320 Speaker 1: good first step on your journey back to ye. 1312 01:00:28,840 --> 01:00:29,600 Speaker 3: Could you repeat that? 1313 01:00:29,640 --> 01:00:35,040 Speaker 6: Because I know I know you want yeah, yeah, Somewhere 1314 01:00:35,080 --> 01:00:36,960 Speaker 6: in the middle is some good advice for you on this. 1315 01:00:37,160 --> 01:00:39,800 Speaker 6: I think it's somewhere in the middle. 1316 01:00:39,960 --> 01:00:44,320 Speaker 3: Like I we definitely unfortunately got sky very high, but 1317 01:00:45,240 --> 01:00:46,760 Speaker 3: that stands out like that. 1318 01:00:47,040 --> 01:00:50,240 Speaker 6: But I do I do want you, like, no matter 1319 01:00:50,320 --> 01:00:53,720 Speaker 6: what all joking aside with this, we do want you 1320 01:00:53,800 --> 01:00:56,360 Speaker 6: to have this conversation with your sister. You owe it 1321 01:00:56,480 --> 01:00:59,560 Speaker 6: to yourself because you feel a certain way about it. 1322 01:00:59,840 --> 01:01:03,080 Speaker 6: So even though it maybe you might be nervous about it, 1323 01:01:03,160 --> 01:01:07,640 Speaker 6: you're intimidated by it. I promise you once you have 1324 01:01:07,720 --> 01:01:10,440 Speaker 6: that conversation, whether it's good or bad, there's gonna be 1325 01:01:10,520 --> 01:01:13,040 Speaker 6: a relief that you feel because at least you're gonna 1326 01:01:13,080 --> 01:01:15,640 Speaker 6: have some better answers than you do now. 1327 01:01:15,800 --> 01:01:17,520 Speaker 3: You have no idea what's going on with you and 1328 01:01:17,600 --> 01:01:18,040 Speaker 3: your sister. 1329 01:01:18,440 --> 01:01:18,760 Speaker 7: You know what. 1330 01:01:19,040 --> 01:01:20,000 Speaker 1: That's a very good point. 1331 01:01:20,200 --> 01:01:23,320 Speaker 2: Like I had several years ago a similar conversation with 1332 01:01:23,440 --> 01:01:26,960 Speaker 2: my sister where we like went to dinner. We knew 1333 01:01:26,960 --> 01:01:29,040 Speaker 2: we were going to hash some shit out. We had 1334 01:01:29,080 --> 01:01:32,480 Speaker 2: a lot of Martini's, Like we talked about it, and 1335 01:01:32,640 --> 01:01:34,760 Speaker 2: like there were some things that she had said to 1336 01:01:34,840 --> 01:01:36,680 Speaker 2: me in the past that she didn't know were as 1337 01:01:36,760 --> 01:01:39,720 Speaker 2: hurtful as they were, and it was, you know, repetitive stuff, 1338 01:01:40,040 --> 01:01:41,680 Speaker 2: And there were things I had said to her that 1339 01:01:41,880 --> 01:01:44,320 Speaker 2: I had no like dumb jokes I was trying to make, 1340 01:01:44,360 --> 01:01:47,000 Speaker 2: and like, oh that was really actually very hurtful to her. 1341 01:01:47,120 --> 01:01:49,840 Speaker 2: So it really was eye opening to be able to 1342 01:01:49,920 --> 01:01:52,760 Speaker 2: like have a conversation where you know, you are going 1343 01:01:52,840 --> 01:01:55,000 Speaker 2: in to have this conversation about like we need to 1344 01:01:55,080 --> 01:01:57,520 Speaker 2: work some shit out, We need to figure some stuff 1345 01:01:57,520 --> 01:01:59,880 Speaker 2: out so that we can be around each other when 1346 01:02:00,040 --> 01:02:02,240 Speaker 2: we want to be here for our mom, because that's 1347 01:02:02,520 --> 01:02:03,200 Speaker 2: where you want to be. 1348 01:02:04,040 --> 01:02:06,680 Speaker 8: Right, Yeah, that is the most important thing to me, exactly. 1349 01:02:07,640 --> 01:02:09,400 Speaker 7: And you know, I like, I mean, my mom is 1350 01:02:09,440 --> 01:02:11,720 Speaker 7: in really good health, but you know, I like to 1351 01:02:11,760 --> 01:02:14,280 Speaker 7: think that she sees this tension even though she absolutely 1352 01:02:14,360 --> 01:02:16,800 Speaker 7: refuses to weigh in on it, and I think she 1353 01:02:16,880 --> 01:02:19,200 Speaker 7: would like she would like to leave this earth knowing 1354 01:02:19,240 --> 01:02:21,680 Speaker 7: that her two girls love each other and can get along. 1355 01:02:21,920 --> 01:02:22,080 Speaker 10: Yeah. 1356 01:02:22,120 --> 01:02:25,240 Speaker 1: And somebody wants to be the cycle breaker. Yeah, so 1357 01:02:25,440 --> 01:02:29,600 Speaker 1: be that person you can break my Yeah. So what 1358 01:02:29,720 --> 01:02:32,120 Speaker 1: you're doing isn't working, So you have to change your 1359 01:02:32,160 --> 01:02:36,440 Speaker 1: approach and then break the cycle. Be a disruptor. This 1360 01:02:36,600 --> 01:02:40,840 Speaker 1: is a good disruptor. You're a bad disruptor. All right, Well, 1361 01:02:41,040 --> 01:02:44,400 Speaker 1: I'm glad you called in and keep us posted. Let 1362 01:02:44,480 --> 01:02:45,160 Speaker 1: us know what happens. 1363 01:02:45,200 --> 01:02:47,720 Speaker 7: Yes, I really appreciate the advice and all the good 1364 01:02:47,760 --> 01:02:49,919 Speaker 7: advice that y'all give on your show over the years 1365 01:02:50,000 --> 01:02:52,560 Speaker 7: of It's helped me a lot in different areas, and 1366 01:02:52,840 --> 01:02:55,320 Speaker 7: I've passed it along to other people that have come 1367 01:02:55,400 --> 01:02:57,960 Speaker 7: to me for advice. It's just, you know, you guys 1368 01:02:58,040 --> 01:03:00,400 Speaker 7: could be just like drinking Martini's all day and not 1369 01:03:00,520 --> 01:03:02,600 Speaker 7: helping people. But you're spending your time doing this and 1370 01:03:02,680 --> 01:03:03,680 Speaker 7: I'm really appreciate it. 1371 01:03:04,480 --> 01:03:07,200 Speaker 1: Thanks, Katie, I love that. Thank you so much. 1372 01:03:07,400 --> 01:03:08,920 Speaker 8: All Right, good luck with this conversation. 1373 01:03:09,080 --> 01:03:12,920 Speaker 1: Okay, all right, thanks, you can do it, all right, 1374 01:03:12,960 --> 01:03:15,440 Speaker 1: and that's it for us today. Thank God. This is 1375 01:03:15,480 --> 01:03:18,600 Speaker 1: so I know, I know, but I have to be honest. 1376 01:03:18,720 --> 01:03:21,680 Speaker 1: I dropped out during the middle of one of those letters. 1377 01:03:22,480 --> 01:03:24,480 Speaker 1: I just was like, my head was in the fucking 1378 01:03:24,560 --> 01:03:26,680 Speaker 1: clouds thinking about what I'm gonna eat later. 1379 01:03:29,240 --> 01:03:30,920 Speaker 8: I picked some very like complicated. 1380 01:03:31,160 --> 01:03:34,400 Speaker 1: This is a great episode, great questions. I like all 1381 01:03:34,480 --> 01:03:39,240 Speaker 1: the drama heavy stuff like that. Even when I'm today, 1382 01:03:40,840 --> 01:03:43,440 Speaker 1: I brought it and listen again. I'm so excited to 1383 01:03:43,520 --> 01:03:46,960 Speaker 1: be on Chelsea Network. This is I can't wait till 1384 01:03:46,960 --> 01:03:49,560 Speaker 1: we get you the color of your Foundation right. I 1385 01:03:49,680 --> 01:03:50,160 Speaker 1: can't wait. 1386 01:03:50,560 --> 01:03:52,840 Speaker 3: I can't wait till you stop bringing that up. Bitch. 1387 01:03:52,920 --> 01:03:55,680 Speaker 3: I told you I'm fine. Don't worry. Don't be checking 1388 01:03:55,760 --> 01:03:58,000 Speaker 3: bitches about their face. Thank you. 1389 01:03:59,120 --> 01:04:03,280 Speaker 6: So anyway, if you want to hear less helpful advice 1390 01:04:03,480 --> 01:04:07,360 Speaker 6: but more in your ass shit, please go listen to 1391 01:04:07,640 --> 01:04:11,360 Speaker 6: your The problem myself included with Yama on the Dear 1392 01:04:11,680 --> 01:04:12,720 Speaker 6: Chelsea Network. 1393 01:04:13,280 --> 01:04:15,960 Speaker 1: This is very exciting, you guys, please go listen to 1394 01:04:16,080 --> 01:04:18,400 Speaker 1: Ya so you can get a dose of her the 1395 01:04:18,440 --> 01:04:21,240 Speaker 1: way I want you to understand what my life is like. 1396 01:04:22,320 --> 01:04:27,240 Speaker 1: So I want everyone to Yeah, and you can follow 1397 01:04:27,280 --> 01:04:30,600 Speaker 1: her on Instagram also, but if you see her do 1398 01:04:30,720 --> 01:04:34,400 Speaker 1: a live please report her to me, to you or 1399 01:04:34,480 --> 01:04:36,760 Speaker 1: to answering. 1400 01:04:37,080 --> 01:04:37,240 Speaker 7: Yeah. 1401 01:04:37,640 --> 01:04:39,840 Speaker 1: Now that she has a podcast, she does not need 1402 01:04:39,920 --> 01:04:43,920 Speaker 1: to do as many lives in a blue Okay that 1403 01:04:44,160 --> 01:04:46,000 Speaker 1: means on every thirty seconds? 1404 01:04:46,120 --> 01:04:47,280 Speaker 3: No, it does it all right? 1405 01:04:47,440 --> 01:04:49,040 Speaker 1: I love you sort of? 1406 01:04:50,080 --> 01:04:50,520 Speaker 3: I love you. 1407 01:04:51,040 --> 01:04:51,440 Speaker 1: I love you? 1408 01:04:51,640 --> 01:04:52,400 Speaker 10: Okay, you know you do. 1409 01:04:52,800 --> 01:04:55,520 Speaker 1: It's called what's You're the problem? You're the problem? 1410 01:04:55,680 --> 01:04:57,120 Speaker 3: Would you like to learn the name. 1411 01:04:57,760 --> 01:05:04,640 Speaker 6: It's also Katine, I love you too. If you're the 1412 01:05:04,760 --> 01:05:09,000 Speaker 6: problem with Yama Nika on Dear Chelsea Network. 1413 01:05:09,040 --> 01:05:10,440 Speaker 1: Do you want to get a massage before you go 1414 01:05:10,520 --> 01:05:11,240 Speaker 1: to the airport tonight. 1415 01:05:11,280 --> 01:05:11,840 Speaker 3: I would love to. 1416 01:05:15,640 --> 01:05:18,360 Speaker 2: If you want advice from Chelsea, write into Dear Chelsea 1417 01:05:18,440 --> 01:05:19,960 Speaker 2: podcast at gmail dot com. 1418 01:05:20,480 --> 01:05:22,960 Speaker 1: Dear Chelsea is a production of iHeartMedia. 1419 01:05:23,280 --> 01:05:26,280 Speaker 2: Follow Chelsea on all socials at Chelsea Handler, and find 1420 01:05:26,360 --> 01:05:30,080 Speaker 2: Katherine on TikTok at flash Cadabra. Dear Chelsea is edited 1421 01:05:30,160 --> 01:05:34,280 Speaker 2: and engineered by Brandon Dickert executive producer Katherine Law. Find 1422 01:05:34,320 --> 01:05:37,480 Speaker 2: full video episodes and minisodes now on Netflix, and get 1423 01:05:37,520 --> 01:05:40,080 Speaker 2: tickets to see Chelsea live at Chelseahandler dot com.