1 00:00:00,880 --> 00:00:04,280 Speaker 1: Well before today's Strawberry Letter. Remember we always want to 2 00:00:04,280 --> 00:00:08,440 Speaker 1: stress to you the importance of voting people. Please Steve 3 00:00:08,440 --> 00:00:12,720 Speaker 1: Harvey Nation, when we all vote dot org, go on it, 4 00:00:12,840 --> 00:00:16,000 Speaker 1: get registered so you can be ready. We have ninety 5 00:00:16,200 --> 00:00:21,360 Speaker 1: days left until the November third election day. Okay, ninety 6 00:00:21,560 --> 00:00:23,800 Speaker 1: days left. That's not a lot of time. That's like 7 00:00:23,880 --> 00:00:27,800 Speaker 1: three months, really three months, So keep that in mind. 8 00:00:27,840 --> 00:00:30,560 Speaker 1: When we all vote dot org. We all have to 9 00:00:30,600 --> 00:00:33,440 Speaker 1: do our parts. Okay, it is time now for the 10 00:00:33,479 --> 00:00:38,040 Speaker 1: Strawberry Letter. And if you need advice and relationships, dating, work, sex, 11 00:00:38,120 --> 00:00:41,360 Speaker 1: parenting and more, please submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve 12 00:00:41,400 --> 00:00:43,640 Speaker 1: HARVEYFM dot com. All you have to do is just 13 00:00:43,720 --> 00:00:47,280 Speaker 1: click submit Strawberry Letter. We could be reading your letter 14 00:00:47,360 --> 00:00:49,760 Speaker 1: live on the air, just like we're going to read 15 00:00:49,800 --> 00:00:53,639 Speaker 1: this one right here, right now. Buggle up, hold on tight. 16 00:00:53,720 --> 00:00:56,120 Speaker 1: We got it for you. Here it is the Strawberry Letter. 17 00:00:56,920 --> 00:00:59,960 Speaker 1: All right, thank you, nephew. Subject my mom is hooked. 18 00:01:00,120 --> 00:01:03,960 Speaker 1: I'm a homeless hustler. Dear Stephen Shirley. I have a 19 00:01:04,040 --> 00:01:07,520 Speaker 1: fifty two year old single woman, single mother who is 20 00:01:07,640 --> 00:01:11,520 Speaker 1: loving and giving person. Three years ago, my mom kept 21 00:01:11,560 --> 00:01:14,759 Speaker 1: saying she was going to reinvent herself and dressed differently 22 00:01:14,800 --> 00:01:17,240 Speaker 1: so she could meet a good man. My mom has 23 00:01:17,280 --> 00:01:19,759 Speaker 1: always had a lot of nice men that come in 24 00:01:19,840 --> 00:01:21,839 Speaker 1: and out of her life, and it breaks my heart 25 00:01:22,080 --> 00:01:25,120 Speaker 1: when she gets attached and the man ends up leaving her. 26 00:01:25,560 --> 00:01:28,840 Speaker 1: The current man she's dating will never leave her because 27 00:01:28,920 --> 00:01:32,240 Speaker 1: he is a big loser and he needs my mom. 28 00:01:32,560 --> 00:01:34,840 Speaker 1: She met him at church and he stood her up 29 00:01:34,920 --> 00:01:37,960 Speaker 1: on their first date. That should have been a red flag. 30 00:01:38,360 --> 00:01:42,240 Speaker 1: That was in January, and somehow they are still together. 31 00:01:42,720 --> 00:01:45,200 Speaker 1: This man is an ex con and when I asked 32 00:01:45,280 --> 00:01:47,880 Speaker 1: him where he works, he told me he's a hustler. 33 00:01:48,240 --> 00:01:51,160 Speaker 1: He has no cell phone and was recently evicted from 34 00:01:51,200 --> 00:01:54,400 Speaker 1: his apartment. My mom has a spare car and he 35 00:01:54,560 --> 00:01:57,800 Speaker 1: drives it daily. But it gets worse. My mom told 36 00:01:57,800 --> 00:02:04,080 Speaker 1: me that he's been sleeping in her car since he 37 00:02:04,200 --> 00:02:08,520 Speaker 1: was evicted and can't get another apartment because he doesn't 38 00:02:08,560 --> 00:02:12,080 Speaker 1: have a state ID. Luckily, he can't stay with my 39 00:02:12,160 --> 00:02:15,440 Speaker 1: mom because my youngest brother still lives at home, so 40 00:02:15,520 --> 00:02:19,360 Speaker 1: instead he sleeps in my mom's car at night and 41 00:02:19,440 --> 00:02:22,799 Speaker 1: he showers at his uncle's house. He pops up at 42 00:02:22,840 --> 00:02:26,720 Speaker 1: my mom's house unannounced if he wants to talk to 43 00:02:26,760 --> 00:02:28,760 Speaker 1: her or see her because he does not have a 44 00:02:28,800 --> 00:02:32,440 Speaker 1: cell phone. My mom always makes excuses for his actions 45 00:02:32,440 --> 00:02:36,000 Speaker 1: and says she's doing the Christian thing by helping him out. 46 00:02:36,440 --> 00:02:39,000 Speaker 1: The final straw was two weeks ago when I caught 47 00:02:39,080 --> 00:02:42,320 Speaker 1: my mom sitting in her car in the parking lot 48 00:02:42,360 --> 00:02:46,840 Speaker 1: of Kroger eating dinner in her car with him. She 49 00:02:47,000 --> 00:02:50,480 Speaker 1: told me it was a sweet, thoughtful date. I don't 50 00:02:50,480 --> 00:02:52,800 Speaker 1: know how she can be so caught up with this bum. 51 00:02:53,360 --> 00:02:56,160 Speaker 1: What can I do to stop this before he totally 52 00:02:56,240 --> 00:02:59,800 Speaker 1: drains my mother of her dignity. Well, there's really not 53 00:02:59,840 --> 00:03:04,120 Speaker 1: a lot you can do. Okay, you know you can't 54 00:03:04,200 --> 00:03:06,880 Speaker 1: change grown people, right, and that's what they are. They're 55 00:03:06,919 --> 00:03:10,200 Speaker 1: grown people, and you may feel the way you feel, 56 00:03:10,240 --> 00:03:13,079 Speaker 1: but this is your mom's life. But having said that, 57 00:03:14,600 --> 00:03:18,840 Speaker 1: your sweet mom can't be serious, can she? Is she 58 00:03:18,919 --> 00:03:22,880 Speaker 1: really serious about this guy? She mentioned being a good 59 00:03:22,960 --> 00:03:25,519 Speaker 1: Christian and helping out. I'm trying to figure out where 60 00:03:25,520 --> 00:03:27,839 Speaker 1: in Christianity or even in the Bible, does it say 61 00:03:27,880 --> 00:03:30,520 Speaker 1: you have to let a man live in your car 62 00:03:30,840 --> 00:03:33,320 Speaker 1: and drive your car daily just because you have an 63 00:03:33,360 --> 00:03:38,680 Speaker 1: extra one. I'm with you, I'm with you all the 64 00:03:38,720 --> 00:03:42,119 Speaker 1: way on this. She certainly lowered her standards. She certainly 65 00:03:42,240 --> 00:03:45,960 Speaker 1: settled with this guy. Reinventing yourself and changing the way 66 00:03:46,000 --> 00:03:50,080 Speaker 1: you dressed to attract someone else certainly doesn't mean this. 67 00:03:50,280 --> 00:03:53,600 Speaker 1: But as her daughter, Remember I told you they're grown. 68 00:03:54,320 --> 00:03:57,440 Speaker 1: All you can do with grown people is let them know, 69 00:03:57,680 --> 00:04:00,240 Speaker 1: and by them, I mean your mom. Let her know 70 00:04:00,320 --> 00:04:02,880 Speaker 1: how you feel. Let her know how it makes you 71 00:04:02,960 --> 00:04:05,720 Speaker 1: feel to see her sitting in her car and lowering 72 00:04:05,760 --> 00:04:08,440 Speaker 1: her standards like this and letting this man drive her 73 00:04:08,440 --> 00:04:11,119 Speaker 1: car and live in her car. Let her know how 74 00:04:11,120 --> 00:04:13,960 Speaker 1: that makes you feel, how concerned you are about her 75 00:04:14,400 --> 00:04:16,800 Speaker 1: and m You know, you gotta tell her things like 76 00:04:16,839 --> 00:04:19,640 Speaker 1: she must have forgotten who she is. She's used to 77 00:04:19,720 --> 00:04:24,119 Speaker 1: dating nicer guys. You know she deserves better. That's really 78 00:04:24,160 --> 00:04:26,800 Speaker 1: all you can do. It's up to your mom to 79 00:04:26,880 --> 00:04:29,360 Speaker 1: decide whether she's going to stay or leave this man, 80 00:04:29,440 --> 00:04:32,800 Speaker 1: And right now it looks like she's gonna stay with him. 81 00:04:34,720 --> 00:04:38,160 Speaker 1: Just be there when she went or if she falls, Steve, 82 00:04:39,120 --> 00:04:42,760 Speaker 1: this ain't gonna last long. This ain't gonna last. This 83 00:04:43,440 --> 00:04:46,719 Speaker 1: is just a break up waiting to happen. I'm sorry 84 00:04:46,760 --> 00:04:50,320 Speaker 1: that you're going through this, young lady, but I have 85 00:04:50,480 --> 00:04:55,760 Speaker 1: some solutions for this. Now, before I give you the solutions, 86 00:04:55,760 --> 00:04:58,840 Speaker 1: I must preempt this by saying that a couple of 87 00:04:58,839 --> 00:05:01,480 Speaker 1: the suggestions that I have for you gonna require that 88 00:05:01,560 --> 00:05:05,720 Speaker 1: you go away for a little while, like you know, 89 00:05:05,760 --> 00:05:08,080 Speaker 1: in order before you do what I'm telling you're about 90 00:05:08,080 --> 00:05:10,679 Speaker 1: to do, try to get your affairs in order, because 91 00:05:12,000 --> 00:05:13,839 Speaker 1: you're gonna be a wait for a little while. Okay, 92 00:05:13,880 --> 00:05:17,039 Speaker 1: but before we do that, let's go. You got a 93 00:05:17,040 --> 00:05:19,960 Speaker 1: fifty two year old single mother. Now she's loving and 94 00:05:20,080 --> 00:05:24,840 Speaker 1: giving person, but according to his letter, she's gullible. All right. 95 00:05:24,960 --> 00:05:28,440 Speaker 1: Three years ago, she kept saying she was gonna reinvent 96 00:05:28,520 --> 00:05:31,760 Speaker 1: herself and dressed differently so she could meet a good man. 97 00:05:32,839 --> 00:05:35,039 Speaker 1: Now you say, she's always had a lot of good 98 00:05:35,080 --> 00:05:38,040 Speaker 1: men and they break her heart and then they end 99 00:05:38,080 --> 00:05:40,400 Speaker 1: up leaving her. Now, a kind man she's dating will 100 00:05:40,480 --> 00:05:43,240 Speaker 1: never leave her because he's a big loser and he 101 00:05:43,320 --> 00:05:47,440 Speaker 1: needs my mom. And you say he's a hustler when 102 00:05:47,440 --> 00:05:50,320 Speaker 1: you're asking what he do, and he don't have an apartment, 103 00:05:50,360 --> 00:05:54,800 Speaker 1: and he don't have a state idea, so he don't 104 00:05:54,800 --> 00:05:57,479 Speaker 1: have a cell phone, he don't have a place to stay, 105 00:05:57,680 --> 00:06:02,200 Speaker 1: he don't own a car, he doesn't have cell phone, car, 106 00:06:02,920 --> 00:06:08,800 Speaker 1: state ID, ain't got nowhere to live? Okay, when you 107 00:06:08,880 --> 00:06:12,000 Speaker 1: said your mother says she was gonna change the way 108 00:06:12,080 --> 00:06:14,479 Speaker 1: she dressed so she could meet a different type of man. 109 00:06:15,480 --> 00:06:21,039 Speaker 1: What did your mama start weighing that got her to him? 110 00:06:22,640 --> 00:06:26,960 Speaker 1: What was her last outfit? And can you take a 111 00:06:27,040 --> 00:06:29,359 Speaker 1: pitch and send it to the morning show so we 112 00:06:29,400 --> 00:06:33,600 Speaker 1: can analyze what she had on that done attracted this 113 00:06:34,880 --> 00:06:38,520 Speaker 1: hustler from the church with no cell phone, no car, 114 00:06:38,680 --> 00:06:41,960 Speaker 1: no apartment, and no state ID. The rest of this 115 00:06:42,160 --> 00:06:45,240 Speaker 1: right after we come back. That's right, Part two of 116 00:06:45,360 --> 00:06:48,720 Speaker 1: Steve's response to the Strawberry letter, My mom has hooked 117 00:06:48,760 --> 00:06:51,440 Speaker 1: one a homeless hustler twenty three minutes after the hour, 118 00:06:51,600 --> 00:06:56,919 Speaker 1: right after this you're listening show, All right, Steve, come on, 119 00:06:57,000 --> 00:07:00,920 Speaker 1: let's recap today's strawberry letter. My mom is hooked on 120 00:07:01,040 --> 00:07:05,720 Speaker 1: a homeless hustler. Your mama's hooked on a homeless hustler 121 00:07:05,880 --> 00:07:10,760 Speaker 1: that she met at church that does not have a car, 122 00:07:12,240 --> 00:07:16,120 Speaker 1: that is not working, that does not have an apartment 123 00:07:16,360 --> 00:07:20,960 Speaker 1: or place to shower, that does not have a state ID. 124 00:07:22,680 --> 00:07:26,520 Speaker 1: But he with your mama, and your mama said that 125 00:07:26,600 --> 00:07:30,000 Speaker 1: what she was gonna do was reinvent herself and dressed 126 00:07:30,000 --> 00:07:34,080 Speaker 1: differently so she could meet a good man. The question 127 00:07:34,160 --> 00:07:38,080 Speaker 1: that we proposed right before we went on break was 128 00:07:38,800 --> 00:07:44,520 Speaker 1: what outfits is your mama putting together in her closet? 129 00:07:44,600 --> 00:07:47,160 Speaker 1: What is she laying out on her bed at night 130 00:07:47,640 --> 00:07:51,520 Speaker 1: and putting it on? That has attracted to no working, 131 00:07:52,280 --> 00:07:57,560 Speaker 1: homeless hustler that go to church and swender women with 132 00:07:57,880 --> 00:08:05,040 Speaker 1: no apartment, car or state ID. The only reason you 133 00:08:05,120 --> 00:08:10,960 Speaker 1: can't have no ID, it's for the last seven years 134 00:08:11,720 --> 00:08:17,160 Speaker 1: you have had a number instead of a name. Let 135 00:08:17,160 --> 00:08:23,360 Speaker 1: the church say man, Amen again a man he has 136 00:08:23,480 --> 00:08:28,200 Speaker 1: no cell phone, evicted, Your mama got a spare car. 137 00:08:28,360 --> 00:08:32,720 Speaker 1: He drives it daily. But it gets worse. Your mama 138 00:08:32,800 --> 00:08:35,920 Speaker 1: told me that he'd been sleeping in her car since 139 00:08:35,920 --> 00:08:38,400 Speaker 1: he was victed. And can't get another department because he 140 00:08:38,440 --> 00:08:42,000 Speaker 1: don't have a state ID. That's a couple of reasons, 141 00:08:42,040 --> 00:08:43,600 Speaker 1: like you can't get an apartment, you don't have a 142 00:08:43,640 --> 00:08:46,439 Speaker 1: state ID, you don't have a job, you don't have credit. 143 00:08:46,640 --> 00:08:50,800 Speaker 1: It's a lot of stuff. Now, Luckily he can't stay 144 00:08:50,840 --> 00:08:53,480 Speaker 1: with your mama because your youngest brother still lives at home, 145 00:08:53,520 --> 00:08:57,440 Speaker 1: and obviously he's of age where he could whip somebody's ass. 146 00:08:58,080 --> 00:09:01,880 Speaker 1: Let's state God for that. Thank you Lord. Little brothers 147 00:09:01,960 --> 00:09:03,920 Speaker 1: over there and is at an age where he could 148 00:09:03,960 --> 00:09:11,160 Speaker 1: he got a hand. Try Jesus, not me, because I'm 149 00:09:11,240 --> 00:09:16,280 Speaker 1: your brother and I throw hands. Thank God for that. 150 00:09:17,880 --> 00:09:20,120 Speaker 1: He pops up at your mama's house on the night 151 00:09:20,320 --> 00:09:22,319 Speaker 1: un announced if he wants to talk to her or 152 00:09:22,400 --> 00:09:26,320 Speaker 1: see her because he don't have a cell phone. I 153 00:09:26,360 --> 00:09:28,920 Speaker 1: remember the last time I didn't have a cell phone. 154 00:09:29,000 --> 00:09:33,480 Speaker 1: I do. I remember very distinctly because it was in 155 00:09:33,520 --> 00:09:35,760 Speaker 1: my twenties. I mean, you know that just I didn't 156 00:09:35,800 --> 00:09:39,800 Speaker 1: like i't had one. It wasn't done. Yeah, that was 157 00:09:39,920 --> 00:09:43,240 Speaker 1: just weren't no cell phone. I remember when I first 158 00:09:43,280 --> 00:09:45,520 Speaker 1: got him, and I had my first cell phone for 159 00:09:45,559 --> 00:09:49,800 Speaker 1: six weeks because it was a bag phone and you 160 00:09:49,800 --> 00:09:51,680 Speaker 1: could plug it up in your car. And I made 161 00:09:51,800 --> 00:09:54,840 Speaker 1: too long distance calls on him. My bone bill would 162 00:09:54,840 --> 00:09:58,640 Speaker 1: fol twenty five, so I said I hadn't paying that, 163 00:09:58,760 --> 00:10:00,760 Speaker 1: and they said, ain't no problem, you ain't talking no, 164 00:10:02,080 --> 00:10:07,880 Speaker 1: So that was that was my first cell phone. Uh. 165 00:10:08,200 --> 00:10:10,920 Speaker 1: My mom always makes excuses for his action and says 166 00:10:11,000 --> 00:10:14,520 Speaker 1: she's doing the Christian thing by helping him out. Come on, 167 00:10:14,600 --> 00:10:17,840 Speaker 1: Now there's a lot of other Christians out here. They 168 00:10:17,880 --> 00:10:23,920 Speaker 1: got Christian shelters, you know, they got Christian centers. Why 169 00:10:24,000 --> 00:10:25,959 Speaker 1: you got to be the Christian help everybody. He got 170 00:10:26,040 --> 00:10:30,800 Speaker 1: your car. If he don't have a state ID, don't 171 00:10:30,800 --> 00:10:34,640 Speaker 1: that mean he don't have a driver's license. He got 172 00:10:34,679 --> 00:10:37,640 Speaker 1: your mama car. He don't have a driver's license, all right. 173 00:10:38,160 --> 00:10:40,360 Speaker 1: The final straw was two weeks ago when I caught 174 00:10:40,400 --> 00:10:43,720 Speaker 1: my mom sitting in her car in the parking lot 175 00:10:43,920 --> 00:10:49,880 Speaker 1: of Kroger eating dinner in her car with him, eating 176 00:10:49,880 --> 00:10:52,480 Speaker 1: out some style phone, just in that eating it. She 177 00:10:52,640 --> 00:10:57,480 Speaker 1: told me it was a sweet thoughtful date. Your MoMA, crazy. 178 00:10:57,760 --> 00:11:01,040 Speaker 1: That was not a date, mccrazy. Let me a fifty 179 00:11:01,080 --> 00:11:03,880 Speaker 1: two year old sitting in your car, not a containers 180 00:11:03,880 --> 00:11:06,000 Speaker 1: and stuff. You had to buy his ass some food. 181 00:11:06,160 --> 00:11:10,079 Speaker 1: That was no damn date. That was a handout. Yeah, 182 00:11:10,240 --> 00:11:13,400 Speaker 1: pass the salt. Please look at a little bog human 183 00:11:13,480 --> 00:11:18,240 Speaker 1: that right, She told me it was a sweet thoughtful date. 184 00:11:18,320 --> 00:11:20,480 Speaker 1: I don't know how she can be so caught up 185 00:11:20,520 --> 00:11:23,040 Speaker 1: with this bum. What can I do to stop this 186 00:11:23,240 --> 00:11:26,080 Speaker 1: before he totally drained my mother of her dignity and 187 00:11:26,240 --> 00:11:30,360 Speaker 1: money and car and credit. There are some things you're 188 00:11:30,400 --> 00:11:34,000 Speaker 1: gonna that you can do. In all seriousness, you probably 189 00:11:34,000 --> 00:11:36,560 Speaker 1: don't need to do any of this because it's not 190 00:11:36,679 --> 00:11:43,160 Speaker 1: worth it. But I would start slipping him notes in 191 00:11:43,280 --> 00:11:49,360 Speaker 1: his refrigerator box. That's why I would start, and his refrigerator. 192 00:11:49,520 --> 00:11:56,960 Speaker 1: He have a refrigerator. Refrigerator box? Surely is that where 193 00:11:57,000 --> 00:12:03,920 Speaker 1: he stayed? Oh oh, oh oh? The cardboard refrigerator all 194 00:12:03,960 --> 00:12:06,439 Speaker 1: you can slide it on the dashboard of your mama's 195 00:12:06,440 --> 00:12:12,079 Speaker 1: card to ward and the note you say this, use 196 00:12:12,120 --> 00:12:14,480 Speaker 1: your mama's first name. Let's just make up a name. 197 00:12:14,520 --> 00:12:19,120 Speaker 1: Your mama named Brenda. The note should say just this 198 00:12:20,480 --> 00:12:26,120 Speaker 1: and type it. If you continue seeing Brenda, I will 199 00:12:26,200 --> 00:12:30,120 Speaker 1: have you killed. That's the note you want to put 200 00:12:30,160 --> 00:12:35,640 Speaker 1: on the dashboard one more time. If you continue to 201 00:12:35,679 --> 00:12:40,320 Speaker 1: see Brenda, I'm gonna have you killed. That shakes up 202 00:12:40,480 --> 00:12:45,160 Speaker 1: most people. Yeah, shook me up. I know it would me. 203 00:12:47,559 --> 00:12:49,400 Speaker 1: I mean, I like a car to live in, but 204 00:12:49,520 --> 00:12:54,280 Speaker 1: not that damn bad. I have other things. But I 205 00:12:54,320 --> 00:12:58,360 Speaker 1: won't do it till you because that's enough. It's a 206 00:12:58,520 --> 00:13:02,960 Speaker 1: lost cause, so lost calls. Yeah it's but don't worry 207 00:13:02,960 --> 00:13:05,679 Speaker 1: about it. She'll wake up before it's too late. Absolutely 208 00:13:05,760 --> 00:13:08,160 Speaker 1: all right, Thank you, Steve Post your comments on Today's 209 00:13:08,240 --> 00:13:11,520 Speaker 1: letter on Instagram, at Steve Harvey FM, and check out 210 00:13:11,559 --> 00:13:15,000 Speaker 1: the Strawberry Letter podcast on demand coming up in ten minutes, 211 00:13:15,280 --> 00:13:19,040 Speaker 1: we'll review the headlines and some trending topics. Right after this, 212 00:13:19,480 --> 00:13:22,199 Speaker 1: you're listening to the Steve Harvey Morning Show.