WEBVTT - Finding the Courage to Speak Up

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<v Speaker 1>Hey, hey, hey, happy birthday to my day friend Day,

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<v Speaker 1>tiff Day.

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<v Speaker 2>Meanwhile, like the next time we say my birthday will

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<v Speaker 2>actually be closer. What No, Oh, that's right, that's true.

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<v Speaker 2>It'll be passed, but only by two days.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm like, my mouth, I cannot be that incorrect.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, well, thank you. Either way, I'm gonna be turning

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<v Speaker 2>none of your business. Like no, I'll be turning thirty eight,

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<v Speaker 2>which all was so crazy coming out of my mouth.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm like, I still fill twenty five.

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<v Speaker 1>Thirty eight sounds great?

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, no, because I mean I'm excited because Superman was like,

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<v Speaker 2>you're not allowed to do any work. He told me

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<v Speaker 2>weeks in advance, where months and advance, like take that

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<v Speaker 2>whole weekend off. And he's been like like leaving the

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<v Speaker 2>house on secret John with like his sister and his

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<v Speaker 2>best friend, and like asking me all these cryptic questions

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<v Speaker 2>about like what shoe sides do I wear? I'm like, lord,

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<v Speaker 2>what does he doing?

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<v Speaker 1>Shoe size? I don't know, Oh, roller skating, let's have it.

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<v Speaker 1>Let's guess roller skating. I hope it's not bowling.

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<v Speaker 2>Right, or just like what size in general? What size

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<v Speaker 2>do you wear in this? What size do you we're

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<v Speaker 2>in that Do you like ear rings?

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<v Speaker 1>Do you?

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<v Speaker 2>I'm like, what's happening.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh, maybe he's gonna pretty woman you.

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<v Speaker 2>I feel like, yeah, honestly, I have a strong suspicion,

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<v Speaker 2>which I'm slightly nervous about because we have different tastes.

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<v Speaker 1>Let's just say you've heard a little bit about that.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, Superman would have me in like door knockers and like,

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<v Speaker 2>you know, cross colors if it was up to him.

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<v Speaker 2>So I'm just like, yeah, let's not go to crazy

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<v Speaker 2>with with the outfit or whatever it is. But I

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<v Speaker 2>did tell him that I but he asked me kind

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<v Speaker 2>of like what did I want? And I said, honestly,

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<v Speaker 2>a house. And then I'm like, now that's happening. So

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<v Speaker 2>now I told him honestly, I just want to spend

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<v Speaker 2>like a nice day with him, just enjoying. Nothing too crazy.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm not, you know. He was like, do you like,

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<v Speaker 2>would you want to go to a club of Minah?

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<v Speaker 2>I mean, I'd have to really be in a mood.

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<v Speaker 2>It's possible, but I doubt it. So we'll see.

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<v Speaker 1>In my experience, going to the club with your esso

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<v Speaker 1>is not that much fun. Yeah, with your husband? I

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<v Speaker 1>mean I love my husband, but I don't. I'd much

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<v Speaker 1>rather be on a couch watching Netflix than like, yes,

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<v Speaker 1>spending fifteen dollars in a cocktail with him, like with

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<v Speaker 1>other people. It's whatever, but you know it's just kind

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<v Speaker 1>of like it's a little awkward.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I feel like that too, So I was like, yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>no likely no club, no club for you.

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<v Speaker 1>But like my mom says, whatever they do, just tell

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<v Speaker 1>them you love it.

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<v Speaker 2>Yes, I have. This is amazing. I'm trying to get

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<v Speaker 2>my voice right. Oh my god, no, that's too high.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh my god. Okay, that's good, that's my normalt. No,

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<v Speaker 2>but I'm sure it's going to be awesome.

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<v Speaker 1>Bless them well, happy early birthday. I will be I

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<v Speaker 1>will toast you you from the resort in the Dominican Republic,

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<v Speaker 1>where I will be beginning tomorrow. I'm so excited.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, how long are you guys going to be there?

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<v Speaker 1>Just just for a wedding. So we're going to be

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<v Speaker 1>there Wednesday through Sunday, so nice, four days. Four days

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<v Speaker 1>is yeah. It's one perk of marrying a Dominican, I guess,

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<v Speaker 1>as you get to go to all the Dominican weddings.

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<v Speaker 1>So I'm really excited.

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<v Speaker 2>Is it. How did the Dominican of Republic fair during

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<v Speaker 2>the hurricanes?

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<v Speaker 1>Really? Actually, they got really lucky, as far as I

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<v Speaker 1>know from his family and friends and what we've heard

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<v Speaker 1>from them, they got really lucky. Of course, you know,

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<v Speaker 1>extended family in Puerto Rico, which there's not very many,

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<v Speaker 1>weren't as lucky. But yeah, Actually I joke because I'm like, yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>I married Dominican, so I get to go whenever I want.

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<v Speaker 1>But joke's on me because he's actually his family's actually

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<v Speaker 1>from the Santiago, the city of Santiago, which is like

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<v Speaker 1>smack in the middle of the country, no water, no

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<v Speaker 1>barely even rivers, Like it's just like the jungle, and

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<v Speaker 1>not really jungle, but it's it's like rainforest and the

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<v Speaker 1>like the worst mosquitoes you'll ever encounter in your life.

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<v Speaker 2>So you're thinking, you're like we with sudden surf, and

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<v Speaker 2>they're like, yeah, more like birds and trees, which are beautiful,

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<v Speaker 2>but not what you were thinking.

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<v Speaker 1>More like, you know, come visit my uncle, and here's

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<v Speaker 1>a mango from his tree, and here's some eggs from

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<v Speaker 1>his chickens. Like you know, it's just like more country

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<v Speaker 1>than that. It has its charms but you know it's

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<v Speaker 1>not a four star resort, which is you know, has

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<v Speaker 1>also has its charms obviously. Yes, I'm looking forward to

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<v Speaker 1>I'm really excited. Oh I could use a vacation after

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<v Speaker 1>what's happening.

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<v Speaker 2>I know, I was in the world so many things.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm like, what should we what should we dig through? First?

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<v Speaker 1>We must we have to talk about this whole Harvey

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<v Speaker 1>Weinstein controversy. I feel like everybody's talking about it now.

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<v Speaker 2>Everybody, And I'm like, it just keeps getting worse and worse.

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<v Speaker 2>And I'm like, what I mean, you know, well for

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<v Speaker 2>those of you who are like, what Harvey Weinstein. So

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<v Speaker 2>just to set the stage, he is he is a producer.

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<v Speaker 1>Manby he's like the producer. I mean, I don't even

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<v Speaker 1>know if the producers is a big enough word for him.

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<v Speaker 1>But he co founded Miramax, which is was ginormous, Yes,

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<v Speaker 1>still powerful, but not as ginormous as it was like

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<v Speaker 1>in the nineties. Yeah, but his his company produces films

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<v Speaker 1>that lots of us have watched and heard of, like Goodwill,

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<v Speaker 1>Hunting and Shakespeare in Love, like all these films that

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<v Speaker 1>have won Oscars over the years. And you I always

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<v Speaker 1>knew him as like that person people thanked and they're

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<v Speaker 1>like they're acceptance speeches. But I never really knew who

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<v Speaker 1>he was. You know, thank you, Hobby Doling like that

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<v Speaker 1>kind of stuff.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah.

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<v Speaker 1>But meanwhile, while he was helping people launch their careers,

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<v Speaker 1>he was also grouping them and dozens of hotel rooms

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<v Speaker 1>around the world, yes.

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<v Speaker 2>And like basically imposing his the power struggle basically like

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<v Speaker 2>so these young women who were you know, up and

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<v Speaker 2>coming models or actresses or whatever, putting them in positions.

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<v Speaker 2>I think I read Ashley Judd, which I love Ashley

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<v Speaker 2>Jed that when she was young, up and coming actress,

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<v Speaker 2>you know, Harvey had her in the room and was

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<v Speaker 2>like basically trying to make over children. She was like, yeah, no,

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<v Speaker 2>I'm kind of good. It was like, well then watch

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<v Speaker 2>me shower and all this other kind of stuff. And

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<v Speaker 2>she didn't know what to do because you know, what

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<v Speaker 2>do you what do you do when you're like, wow,

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<v Speaker 2>this person can make or literally destroy my acting career,

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<v Speaker 2>what do you do?

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah? He was literally producing the movie that she was

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<v Speaker 1>shooting at that time.

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<v Speaker 2>Yep, And so she was so nervous. So she turned

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<v Speaker 2>him down obviously, but was nervous about what was that

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<v Speaker 2>going to mean? She told her mom and I think

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<v Speaker 2>I read this article. She told her mom and her

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<v Speaker 2>mom was like, yes, that was definitely sexual harassment. I mean,

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<v Speaker 2>she went on to obviously do the movie and do well,

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<v Speaker 2>and she said she didn't have an incident from him

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<v Speaker 2>after that. But still other actresses are coming forward, like

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<v Speaker 2>Wereyneth Paltrow and Angelina Joe Lee and just like wow

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<v Speaker 2>and just like his secretaries and all that kind of stuff,

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<v Speaker 2>and You're just.

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<v Speaker 1>Like, what, you know, That's what really grosses me out

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<v Speaker 1>about the story because so first there was a New

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<v Speaker 1>York Times article, and in the New York Times article

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<v Speaker 1>they say there are several other media organizations that have

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<v Speaker 1>been trying to do this story for years, but you

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<v Speaker 1>could they couldn't get enough people to come forward. But

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<v Speaker 1>so the New York Times finally gets I think, enough

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<v Speaker 1>people to come forward and use their names to go

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<v Speaker 1>forward with their story. And then The New Yorker Today

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<v Speaker 1>published their takedown, which is which which included women who

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<v Speaker 1>said that he actually assaulted them and in some cases

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<v Speaker 1>possibly allegedly raped them or forced himselves on them. And

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<v Speaker 1>then and then on top of that, the New York

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<v Speaker 1>Times ran another story where like Gwyneth Paltrow and bigger

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<v Speaker 1>names were coming out now acknowledging and what's really freaking

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<v Speaker 1>creepy is like every and I'm sure even the reporters

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<v Speaker 1>have more they I'm sure they have more examples of

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<v Speaker 1>this than they even included in their stories. But all

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<v Speaker 1>the stories the same, Like he invited me to a

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<v Speaker 1>room and there was a casting agent or an assistant

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<v Speaker 1>who was supposed to be there, but they disappeared, and

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<v Speaker 1>then we were alone, and then he asked for a massage,

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<v Speaker 1>Like it's constantly him asking for a massage, or watch

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<v Speaker 1>me undressed, or watch me take a shower, you know,

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<v Speaker 1>come into the bath with me, like so, and it's

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<v Speaker 1>just it's just be canny how all the stories are

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<v Speaker 1>the same, and he's been doing this for so long

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<v Speaker 1>and it was this apparently, I mean, we're not in

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<v Speaker 1>the world of Hollywood, but apparently it was just like

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<v Speaker 1>open secret for so long.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah. Yeah, And now we're at.

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<v Speaker 1>A point where you know, he's been out. First he

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<v Speaker 1>took a leave of absence. Then I then I'm pretty

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<v Speaker 1>sure his company saw the New Yorker story or were

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<v Speaker 1>asked to comment on it, and then actually fired him.

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<v Speaker 1>So now he's been completely ousted from his company. But

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<v Speaker 1>I'm like, how was it down? Did it go on

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<v Speaker 1>for I mean, I I guess I understand how it

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<v Speaker 1>went on for so long because we've seen it in

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<v Speaker 1>so many other cases like Roger Ayles, Bill O'Reilly, Bill Cosby, Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>we're and you know Bill Cosby. It was sort of

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<v Speaker 1>the same thing where oh, he gave me a drink

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<v Speaker 1>and then I woke up and I had no idea

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<v Speaker 1>what happened.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, And then you're like, cause, what does this mean?

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<v Speaker 2>Because obviously he clearly targeted people who were you know,

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<v Speaker 2>up and coming or you know, I mean, there are

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<v Speaker 2>not too many people honestly in the movie industry that

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<v Speaker 2>were bigger than Harvey. So almost everybody is quote unquote

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<v Speaker 2>below him, you know. And so I just can't imagine

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<v Speaker 2>being like, you know, this like up and coming actress

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<v Speaker 2>and wanting to succeed and then this man, who you know,

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<v Speaker 2>is all powerful in this industry and he comes on

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<v Speaker 2>to you, and you're like, what do I do? Like,

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<v Speaker 2>am I supposed to tell? But then if you tell,

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<v Speaker 2>that's it for your career? Like what do you do?

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<v Speaker 2>That's why so many people didn't want to come forward.

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<v Speaker 2>I can understand that.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, and lean like there's been a lot of I

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<v Speaker 1>think in the day, like the days after the New

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<v Speaker 1>York Times story, because I was like last week that

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<v Speaker 1>came out, people were being critical of the lack of

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<v Speaker 1>you know, you know, after a story like this comes out,

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<v Speaker 1>typically you hear from females in the industry, like we did.

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<v Speaker 1>We heard from like Lena Dunnam and others, but a

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<v Speaker 1>lot of people were like, where are the men at?

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<v Speaker 1>Where are the men at condemning this behavior? And I

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<v Speaker 1>think I just today saw a headline from Matt Damon.

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<v Speaker 2>And Ben Affleck too.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh Ben Affleck too, who came out and spoke out

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<v Speaker 1>because their movie Goodwill Hunting and you know was produced

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<v Speaker 1>by him. So but I'd be interested to see who

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<v Speaker 1>else in the industry speaks out again against it, because

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<v Speaker 1>like even faves like Meryl Streep have in their speeches

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<v Speaker 1>been like, I have to think this man, you know,

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<v Speaker 1>he made my career, you know, I owe him everything,

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<v Speaker 1>and yeah, it's a key, it's and it's it's just

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<v Speaker 1>like another And I was reading the stories in The

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<v Speaker 1>New Yorker because I think it had better anecdotes from

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<v Speaker 1>the women who were impacted, Like there was one woman

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<v Speaker 1>who was an Italian actress who Clayton, who alleges that

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<v Speaker 1>he forced himself on her and she eventually gave in

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<v Speaker 1>to what he was trying to do and went through

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<v Speaker 1>with it, and how she just blamed herself for years

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<v Speaker 1>and years and it was really the nuances. I think

0:11:06.240 --> 0:11:08.880
<v Speaker 1>it really, I think it really her story especially, I

0:11:08.880 --> 0:11:11.800
<v Speaker 1>think was a good example of how gray and icky

0:11:11.840 --> 0:11:16.640
<v Speaker 1>and complex sometimes instances of sexual assault can be. It's

0:11:16.679 --> 0:11:19.520
<v Speaker 1>not the black and white, you know, he forced himself

0:11:19.559 --> 0:11:21.079
<v Speaker 1>on me and I kicked him in the balls and

0:11:21.160 --> 0:11:26.360
<v Speaker 1>ran away. There's so much psychological like warfare happening, and

0:11:26.720 --> 0:11:30.400
<v Speaker 1>the power dynamic between you know, this great like you said,

0:11:30.400 --> 0:11:33.280
<v Speaker 1>like a media mogul and a young actress is so

0:11:34.040 --> 0:11:36.360
<v Speaker 1>just like having all that pressure on you and then

0:11:36.400 --> 0:11:39.920
<v Speaker 1>someone's forcing himself on you. I can't blame. And I

0:11:39.960 --> 0:11:41.599
<v Speaker 1>hope it's sad to me to hear the woman the

0:11:41.679 --> 0:11:44.840
<v Speaker 1>victims blaming themselves, but I think it's important to hear

0:11:44.880 --> 0:11:48.240
<v Speaker 1>their stories because it shows that even if it's not

0:11:48.400 --> 0:11:52.560
<v Speaker 1>that movie version of sexual assault, it's still assault. Yeah,

0:11:52.600 --> 0:11:56.679
<v Speaker 1>and you know, and they still deserve to have a

0:11:56.760 --> 0:11:59.400
<v Speaker 1>voice and to speak out against it and not feel

0:11:59.440 --> 0:12:02.480
<v Speaker 1>like they're going to be persecuted because it wasn't like

0:12:02.559 --> 0:12:05.640
<v Speaker 1>a textbook you know, sexual assault, if there is such

0:12:05.640 --> 0:12:05.960
<v Speaker 1>a thing.

0:12:08.559 --> 0:12:12.240
<v Speaker 2>So how like, why now did the New Yorker kind

0:12:12.240 --> 0:12:14.240
<v Speaker 2>of say that kind of like perused through the article

0:12:14.280 --> 0:12:16.800
<v Speaker 2>like what you know, what was the tipping point to

0:12:16.920 --> 0:12:18.079
<v Speaker 2>make this story break?

0:12:18.720 --> 0:12:20.760
<v Speaker 1>Honestly, the way that the New York Times, like I said,

0:12:20.840 --> 0:12:23.960
<v Speaker 1>the New York Times article had to acknowledged that several

0:12:23.960 --> 0:12:27.040
<v Speaker 1>other organizations have been trying to write this story for years,

0:12:27.040 --> 0:12:28.600
<v Speaker 1>and in fact, a couple of them are working on

0:12:28.640 --> 0:12:30.959
<v Speaker 1>stories right now. I think the New York Times was

0:12:31.000 --> 0:12:32.640
<v Speaker 1>the first one to get enough people to go on

0:12:32.679 --> 0:12:35.520
<v Speaker 1>the record. They probably got Ashley Judd and a couple

0:12:35.480 --> 0:12:36.960
<v Speaker 1>of other women to come on the record, and they

0:12:36.960 --> 0:12:40.439
<v Speaker 1>were like, Okay, we have enough information, we can go forward.

0:12:40.480 --> 0:12:43.319
<v Speaker 1>And they probably got those on the record comments before

0:12:43.880 --> 0:12:47.320
<v Speaker 1>the other organizations did, and then I think the New

0:12:47.400 --> 0:12:50.240
<v Speaker 1>Yorker right behind them. The New Yorker probably might have

0:12:50.320 --> 0:12:52.520
<v Speaker 1>even been ready to publish your own story last week,

0:12:52.559 --> 0:12:55.520
<v Speaker 1>but maybe waited. This is just me kind of understanding

0:12:55.520 --> 0:12:58.000
<v Speaker 1>how like media organizations wait so if the New York

0:12:58.000 --> 0:13:00.680
<v Speaker 1>Times scoops you own a story like that's so, But

0:13:00.800 --> 0:13:02.719
<v Speaker 1>then you go and try and get more sources, more

0:13:02.720 --> 0:13:05.240
<v Speaker 1>on the record sources, and run your own story. And

0:13:05.760 --> 0:13:08.000
<v Speaker 1>I think that I think that the New York Times

0:13:08.320 --> 0:13:11.360
<v Speaker 1>finally got enough people after all these years to go

0:13:11.440 --> 0:13:15.240
<v Speaker 1>on the record publisher story. And now, like we've seen

0:13:15.240 --> 0:13:17.520
<v Speaker 1>in the past with Bill Cosby and others, as soon

0:13:17.559 --> 0:13:21.160
<v Speaker 1>as the first story goes out, everyone not everybody, but

0:13:21.240 --> 0:13:22.920
<v Speaker 1>like a lot of people want to come forward, and

0:13:22.960 --> 0:13:24.680
<v Speaker 1>then you'll start seeing stories everywhere.

0:13:24.840 --> 0:13:27.120
<v Speaker 2>Shoot, yeah, well that's because then I cant understand. People

0:13:27.160 --> 0:13:29.640
<v Speaker 2>are like, you know, oh, why are you saying something now?

0:13:29.920 --> 0:13:33.520
<v Speaker 2>Because if I don't think anyone's going to believe me,

0:13:34.160 --> 0:13:37.560
<v Speaker 2>I'm likely not to say anything. But once somebody can confirm.

0:13:37.640 --> 0:13:39.520
<v Speaker 2>And sometimes you think you're the only person when something

0:13:39.559 --> 0:13:41.720
<v Speaker 2>bad happens to you, and then you find out way

0:13:41.760 --> 0:13:44.360
<v Speaker 2>that happened to you too, So there's the safety of

0:13:44.480 --> 0:13:47.120
<v Speaker 2>like I can now be believed, you know. And I

0:13:47.160 --> 0:13:49.280
<v Speaker 2>think a lot of the actresses that are coming forward now,

0:13:49.280 --> 0:13:51.440
<v Speaker 2>you know, they have these established careers that he can't

0:13:52.040 --> 0:13:55.080
<v Speaker 2>necessarily harm like when they were beginning, you know, kind

0:13:55.080 --> 0:13:58.040
<v Speaker 2>of like new actresses, So I could see why Ashley

0:13:58.120 --> 0:14:00.520
<v Speaker 2>Jed was like, you know what, I can come out

0:14:00.559 --> 0:14:03.079
<v Speaker 2>now because I'm established, and this is not right.

0:14:03.280 --> 0:14:06.160
<v Speaker 1>You know, we are not friendly to young women who

0:14:06.200 --> 0:14:09.200
<v Speaker 1>speak out who are not established, because like you're not

0:14:09.640 --> 0:14:12.000
<v Speaker 1>you look at the there was one woman, I think

0:14:12.000 --> 0:14:14.120
<v Speaker 1>it was the New Yorker who got the audio. So

0:14:14.240 --> 0:14:16.840
<v Speaker 1>this woman basically claimed went to the police, said that

0:14:16.880 --> 0:14:19.680
<v Speaker 1>he groped her, and the police wanted to put together

0:14:19.720 --> 0:14:21.680
<v Speaker 1>a sting operation so they might drew up and send

0:14:21.760 --> 0:14:24.280
<v Speaker 1>him to his hotel room, and want wanted her to

0:14:24.320 --> 0:14:27.880
<v Speaker 1>have a conversation with him about what happened. And she does,

0:14:27.880 --> 0:14:29.640
<v Speaker 1>and anyway, the New Yorker has the audio of it,

0:14:29.680 --> 0:14:32.720
<v Speaker 1>and it's really disgusting and what he's like, I'm a

0:14:32.800 --> 0:14:36.280
<v Speaker 1>very famous man, you know, don't embarrass yourself. Don't lose

0:14:36.280 --> 0:14:38.760
<v Speaker 1>your friendship with me for five minutes because he wanted

0:14:38.800 --> 0:14:40.560
<v Speaker 1>her to come talk to him for five minutes. Anyway,

0:14:41.480 --> 0:14:44.520
<v Speaker 1>But this woman actually so she went to the police.

0:14:44.560 --> 0:14:47.000
<v Speaker 1>I believe she went out. She's come out before and

0:14:47.040 --> 0:14:50.080
<v Speaker 1>gone public with her accusations, and all of a sudden

0:14:50.120 --> 0:14:52.200
<v Speaker 1>there was like his lawyers, there was like a smear

0:14:52.240 --> 0:14:55.960
<v Speaker 1>campaign against her, you know, this stuff in her past.

0:14:56.040 --> 0:14:59.840
<v Speaker 1>And I mean, and honestly, if I were a woman

0:15:00.520 --> 0:15:04.280
<v Speaker 1>who had been assaulted by a famous man or like

0:15:04.360 --> 0:15:07.520
<v Speaker 1>a man in a place of power, and I saw

0:15:08.200 --> 0:15:10.640
<v Speaker 1>that it took thirty years for this to come forward,

0:15:10.720 --> 0:15:12.800
<v Speaker 1>like I wish I wouldn't It wouldn't encourage me to

0:15:12.840 --> 0:15:15.360
<v Speaker 1>speak up. These types of stories just I just feel

0:15:15.360 --> 0:15:19.360
<v Speaker 1>like they almost make you feel like even less like

0:15:19.400 --> 0:15:22.800
<v Speaker 1>you want to speak up because clearly it took like

0:15:23.040 --> 0:15:26.800
<v Speaker 1>so many years, so many voices coming together for this

0:15:26.880 --> 0:15:28.560
<v Speaker 1>kind of story to come out.

0:15:30.360 --> 0:15:32.920
<v Speaker 2>And I mean, I agree, I don't know that. I mean,

0:15:33.280 --> 0:15:36.280
<v Speaker 2>when someone's in the position of power, it's not just

0:15:36.320 --> 0:15:38.960
<v Speaker 2>like it's your livelihood. What do you say? You know?

0:15:40.320 --> 0:15:42.520
<v Speaker 1>And I always go back to that story of it

0:15:42.560 --> 0:15:45.040
<v Speaker 1>doesn't have to be sexual assault. It's like, do you

0:15:45.040 --> 0:15:48.080
<v Speaker 1>remember that story? When I was at Yahoo and I

0:15:48.160 --> 0:15:50.960
<v Speaker 1>had the makeup artist I was working with this makeup

0:15:51.000 --> 0:15:55.280
<v Speaker 1>artist he was he was he had been working there

0:15:55.320 --> 0:15:58.240
<v Speaker 1>for like I think a year or two, and slowly,

0:15:58.280 --> 0:16:01.200
<v Speaker 1>over the course of working with him, he would say

0:16:01.280 --> 0:16:07.080
<v Speaker 1>the most mean, like abusive, like manipulative things to me,

0:16:07.240 --> 0:16:11.600
<v Speaker 1>just like little things like you know, uh, he would

0:16:12.360 --> 0:16:14.360
<v Speaker 1>I'm struggling to come up with examples now because it's

0:16:14.360 --> 0:16:19.440
<v Speaker 1>been so long. But in one case, he was like,

0:16:19.560 --> 0:16:22.360
<v Speaker 1>really really being rough with my makeup, and I said,

0:16:23.280 --> 0:16:25.960
<v Speaker 1>you know, could you please, you know, go lighter with

0:16:26.000 --> 0:16:27.720
<v Speaker 1>the with the makeup. And this was toward the end

0:16:27.800 --> 0:16:30.080
<v Speaker 1>of all these altercations we had had over the course

0:16:30.120 --> 0:16:33.000
<v Speaker 1>of like six months or whatever. And he's like, well,

0:16:33.040 --> 0:16:34.240
<v Speaker 1>you know, this is why no one wants to work

0:16:34.240 --> 0:16:36.560
<v Speaker 1>with you at Yahoo. This is why no one wants.

0:16:36.800 --> 0:16:38.520
<v Speaker 1>He would say these little things, and I would just

0:16:38.880 --> 0:16:41.400
<v Speaker 1>want to be I would want to not be a diva.

0:16:41.600 --> 0:16:43.680
<v Speaker 1>There is always other people in the room, and I

0:16:43.960 --> 0:16:46.040
<v Speaker 1>was a lowly, not a lowly, but I wasn't like

0:16:46.360 --> 0:16:48.960
<v Speaker 1>Katie Kirk. And you know, I wasn't like, I wasn't

0:16:48.960 --> 0:16:50.520
<v Speaker 1>top of the call sheet. I was just in my doom,

0:16:50.520 --> 0:16:52.080
<v Speaker 1>my little money minutes, you know, get him my makeup

0:16:52.120 --> 0:16:53.840
<v Speaker 1>done or whatever. So I didn't want to cause a stink.

0:16:54.480 --> 0:16:57.040
<v Speaker 1>But then finally I opened up to another girl, another

0:16:57.080 --> 0:17:00.520
<v Speaker 1>young another young reporter who has an anchor on the shows,

0:17:00.560 --> 0:17:02.160
<v Speaker 1>and she was like, oh my god, he says the

0:17:02.160 --> 0:17:05.240
<v Speaker 1>most abusive things to me too. And then another girl

0:17:05.320 --> 0:17:07.840
<v Speaker 1>talked about how one time he looked at her and

0:17:07.960 --> 0:17:10.120
<v Speaker 1>was like, you know, asked her who abused her as

0:17:10.119 --> 0:17:11.639
<v Speaker 1>a child to make her act like the way she

0:17:11.680 --> 0:17:15.280
<v Speaker 1>was acting, Oh my gosh, And we all three were like,

0:17:15.560 --> 0:17:17.679
<v Speaker 1>you know, in my in my case, it wasn't like

0:17:17.760 --> 0:17:20.200
<v Speaker 1>every everything he was saying to me was so it

0:17:20.320 --> 0:17:22.560
<v Speaker 1>wasn't going to break me. It wasn't like, you know,

0:17:23.359 --> 0:17:25.280
<v Speaker 1>I wasn't going to walk out of there, and you know,

0:17:25.320 --> 0:17:29.000
<v Speaker 1>as a whole human. But they were just slowly just

0:17:29.040 --> 0:17:34.400
<v Speaker 1>like very very like disturbing and like uh verbally abusive

0:17:34.400 --> 0:17:35.800
<v Speaker 1>things that he was saying. And then to find out

0:17:35.840 --> 0:17:37.919
<v Speaker 1>other women were experiencing it, and then we sent a

0:17:37.960 --> 0:17:41.240
<v Speaker 1>group email to the video department and he ended up

0:17:41.440 --> 0:17:44.520
<v Speaker 1>not working there anymore. But that that, to me is

0:17:44.600 --> 0:17:47.480
<v Speaker 1>like an example of it's those little subtle things that

0:17:47.600 --> 0:17:50.720
<v Speaker 1>can add up. And then I and I was like, well,

0:17:50.760 --> 0:17:52.879
<v Speaker 1>why didn't I say anything sooner? You know that the

0:17:52.920 --> 0:17:54.680
<v Speaker 1>head of the head of video even asked me, you know,

0:17:54.720 --> 0:17:58.640
<v Speaker 1>why didn't you say anything sooner? And I'm like, I

0:17:58.640 --> 0:17:59.040
<v Speaker 1>I don't, you.

0:17:59.000 --> 0:18:00.639
<v Speaker 2>Don't want to know. I don't know. I taught not

0:18:00.680 --> 0:18:03.400
<v Speaker 2>to be troublemakers. You're taught not to rock the boat.

0:18:03.400 --> 0:18:04.960
<v Speaker 2>You're taught not to disrupt, you.

0:18:04.920 --> 0:18:08.400
<v Speaker 1>Know, yeah, and you're and you're also taught. It's almost

0:18:08.400 --> 0:18:10.919
<v Speaker 1>like you it's like, oh, is it really that bad?

0:18:11.080 --> 0:18:14.080
<v Speaker 1>It's like no one teaches you. When is it? You know,

0:18:14.880 --> 0:18:16.760
<v Speaker 1>when is it so bad that you have to speak up?

0:18:16.840 --> 0:18:19.080
<v Speaker 1>You know, I don't know. It just didn't seem so

0:18:19.119 --> 0:18:20.920
<v Speaker 1>black and white to me that, okay, I really need

0:18:20.920 --> 0:18:23.320
<v Speaker 1>to speak up. But then and it also didn't seem

0:18:23.560 --> 0:18:25.480
<v Speaker 1>you know, I'm a tough cookie, like I can take

0:18:25.960 --> 0:18:28.840
<v Speaker 1>this jackass, you know, saying things to me. But then

0:18:28.880 --> 0:18:31.639
<v Speaker 1>to find out that other women had been spoken to

0:18:31.720 --> 0:18:34.040
<v Speaker 1>even worse than I had, and like maybe if I

0:18:34.080 --> 0:18:35.840
<v Speaker 1>had spoken up, he would have been fired, and you know,

0:18:35.840 --> 0:18:38.800
<v Speaker 1>he wouldn't had an opportunity. I always think about that,

0:18:39.640 --> 0:18:41.800
<v Speaker 1>and I don't know, I don't I don't know if

0:18:41.840 --> 0:18:44.520
<v Speaker 1>I would do anything differently. I wish I could say, yeah,

0:18:44.600 --> 0:18:47.080
<v Speaker 1>you know, I I would go back and speak up earlier.

0:18:47.119 --> 0:18:49.679
<v Speaker 1>But you never know until you're in that seat as

0:18:49.680 --> 0:18:50.240
<v Speaker 1>a young woman.

0:18:51.320 --> 0:18:53.920
<v Speaker 2>No, you're you're right. You never know, honestly until it's

0:18:53.960 --> 0:18:56.919
<v Speaker 2>so easy, until kind of like your back is against

0:18:56.960 --> 0:18:59.719
<v Speaker 2>the wall and it's just it's I find that I'm

0:18:59.720 --> 0:19:02.040
<v Speaker 2>a much better advocate for other people than I am

0:19:02.080 --> 0:19:06.719
<v Speaker 2>for myself, And so you know, it's easy for me,

0:19:06.760 --> 0:19:08.800
<v Speaker 2>Like if I see someone doing something wrong with someone else,

0:19:08.800 --> 0:19:12.440
<v Speaker 2>I'm like, what, like no, but me, I'm like, well,

0:19:12.680 --> 0:19:14.840
<v Speaker 2>you know, I could take it. I could. A lot

0:19:14.880 --> 0:19:17.440
<v Speaker 2>of times I stand up only because, like you said,

0:19:17.480 --> 0:19:19.480
<v Speaker 2>I think about what does this mean for someone else?

0:19:19.600 --> 0:19:22.960
<v Speaker 1>You know, I know, is there any case in your

0:19:22.960 --> 0:19:25.240
<v Speaker 1>life where you're like, do you have this? Have you

0:19:25.280 --> 0:19:28.720
<v Speaker 1>ever had an interaction with someone like consecutive times and

0:19:28.760 --> 0:19:30.720
<v Speaker 1>you're like, next time, I'm going to say this, or

0:19:30.760 --> 0:19:32.320
<v Speaker 1>like next time I'm going to do this different, And

0:19:32.359 --> 0:19:34.120
<v Speaker 1>then it keeps happening and then you just for some

0:19:34.240 --> 0:19:37.640
<v Speaker 1>reason or the other, continue to not speak up for yourself.

0:19:38.040 --> 0:19:39.920
<v Speaker 2>Oh yeah, all the time. I told you, like I

0:19:40.000 --> 0:19:42.119
<v Speaker 2>had a bad habit of having like and thank you

0:19:42.119 --> 0:19:44.119
<v Speaker 2>guys for tweeting me about like someone actually told me

0:19:44.160 --> 0:19:48.240
<v Speaker 2>they're like I'm a fully friend. I'm like, oh oh,

0:19:48.440 --> 0:19:51.679
<v Speaker 2>people are like confessing, I'm so sorry. So yeah, because

0:19:52.000 --> 0:19:55.000
<v Speaker 2>like I said, I tend to I don't know if

0:19:55.000 --> 0:19:58.840
<v Speaker 2>it's like middle child syndrome, but I'm a people pleaser

0:19:59.440 --> 0:20:02.760
<v Speaker 2>and so well I always take it really personally. If

0:20:02.800 --> 0:20:06.879
<v Speaker 2>someone is mean to me or doing something because I

0:20:06.880 --> 0:20:08.720
<v Speaker 2>think to myself, well, what did I what did I

0:20:08.880 --> 0:20:12.800
<v Speaker 2>do to elicit this response? I must not be nice enough,

0:20:12.840 --> 0:20:14.480
<v Speaker 2>like I smile enough and perky and I said, hey,

0:20:14.560 --> 0:20:17.760
<v Speaker 2>it's okay, you know, And what's so bad about when

0:20:17.840 --> 0:20:21.320
<v Speaker 2>someone is like when someone is just nasty or mean

0:20:21.440 --> 0:20:23.440
<v Speaker 2>and they pick up on, oh got me a people

0:20:23.480 --> 0:20:26.480
<v Speaker 2>pleaser here, they will abuse you more than the average.

0:20:26.720 --> 0:20:28.439
<v Speaker 2>And so I've definitely been there where I'm like, oh

0:20:28.440 --> 0:20:30.919
<v Speaker 2>my gosh, okay, this has gone too far. You know,

0:20:31.000 --> 0:20:35.479
<v Speaker 2>next time, I'm gonna say, hey, you not today, and

0:20:35.520 --> 0:20:38.119
<v Speaker 2>I'm like and then it happens, and I'm like, uh,

0:20:38.200 --> 0:20:41.040
<v Speaker 2>you know what, Actually, I'm just gonna be even nicer.

0:20:41.200 --> 0:20:44.359
<v Speaker 2>But then every like every once in a while, like

0:20:44.440 --> 0:20:47.439
<v Speaker 2>I will break where it'll be like I'm exhausted and

0:20:47.480 --> 0:20:50.080
<v Speaker 2>I've tried and I'm tired, and then I will be like,

0:20:50.240 --> 0:20:52.520
<v Speaker 2>not today, you know, and I finally signed up for

0:20:52.560 --> 0:20:56.040
<v Speaker 2>myself and they're like and I find that sometimes, like

0:20:56.080 --> 0:20:58.000
<v Speaker 2>I remember when I used to teach preschool, I had

0:20:58.000 --> 0:21:02.560
<v Speaker 2>this woman who was so mean to me, and I

0:21:02.600 --> 0:21:04.600
<v Speaker 2>was twenty two and she was like forty something and

0:21:04.680 --> 0:21:09.000
<v Speaker 2>she just made it so difficult to be a good teacher,

0:21:09.520 --> 0:21:14.520
<v Speaker 2>and she finally I snapped, and I said, enough, you're

0:21:14.520 --> 0:21:16.120
<v Speaker 2>not gonna talk to me this way. You're not gonna

0:21:16.119 --> 0:21:17.720
<v Speaker 2>treat me this way. It was even it was another

0:21:17.800 --> 0:21:20.120
<v Speaker 2>layer that she was older, and like I just grew

0:21:20.160 --> 0:21:22.920
<v Speaker 2>up like in a culture where you really don't talk

0:21:22.960 --> 0:21:25.119
<v Speaker 2>back to older people, like there's a level of respect

0:21:25.160 --> 0:21:28.119
<v Speaker 2>that you must display, And so finally I snapped and

0:21:28.160 --> 0:21:30.480
<v Speaker 2>that was all she needed. She basically was like, girl,

0:21:30.600 --> 0:21:32.199
<v Speaker 2>was waiting for you to stick up for yourself, and

0:21:32.240 --> 0:21:35.480
<v Speaker 2>I'm like, really, so abuse for a year, But yeah,

0:21:35.560 --> 0:21:39.520
<v Speaker 2>it's not easy to stand up for yourself. But for

0:21:39.560 --> 0:21:41.399
<v Speaker 2>some people, they have an easier time, but for me,

0:21:41.840 --> 0:21:45.800
<v Speaker 2>it's certainly not easy. But I'm definitely gotten better at

0:21:45.840 --> 0:21:48.199
<v Speaker 2>it where I don't let it linger as long as

0:21:48.240 --> 0:21:52.240
<v Speaker 2>I used to, or I recognize it further away, where

0:21:52.280 --> 0:21:55.240
<v Speaker 2>if I see someone has that tendency I did, I'm like, okay,

0:21:55.359 --> 0:21:57.280
<v Speaker 2>I'm not even gonna allow them into my space. So

0:21:57.800 --> 0:21:59.680
<v Speaker 2>I try to like nip it off by the bud

0:21:59.680 --> 0:22:02.000
<v Speaker 2>because I, like I said, I don't I hate conflict.

0:22:02.320 --> 0:22:04.720
<v Speaker 2>I don't like people being upset with me, and so

0:22:05.240 --> 0:22:08.280
<v Speaker 2>it's not really my nature to like if me and

0:22:08.320 --> 0:22:10.800
<v Speaker 2>Superman are like in a you know, like we're having

0:22:10.840 --> 0:22:13.800
<v Speaker 2>an argument or whatever, I'm the silent one, like, you know,

0:22:14.080 --> 0:22:16.199
<v Speaker 2>like he's like, well, let's talk about it, and I'm like,

0:22:16.400 --> 0:22:18.040
<v Speaker 2>I don't know, conflict. I will just pretend like it

0:22:18.080 --> 0:22:19.720
<v Speaker 2>ever happened. Okay, It's like.

0:22:19.600 --> 0:22:22.800
<v Speaker 1>That's that's not how that sounds healthy.

0:22:23.560 --> 0:22:25.359
<v Speaker 2>But he's so good. I'm like, where should I how

0:22:25.359 --> 0:22:28.399
<v Speaker 2>to communicate like this? He such a good communicator, Like

0:22:28.720 --> 0:22:31.080
<v Speaker 2>so yesterday, you know, I can tell you're mad, So

0:22:31.119 --> 0:22:32.800
<v Speaker 2>what happened? And I'm like, who are you? He's like,

0:22:32.880 --> 0:22:35.280
<v Speaker 2>doctor Phil And meanwhile I'm like, no, I'm saying I'm fine.

0:22:35.280 --> 0:22:36.639
<v Speaker 2>He's like really, cause you haven't spoken to me in

0:22:36.640 --> 0:22:39.640
<v Speaker 2>twenty four hours. I'm like, have I been silent? Let's

0:22:39.680 --> 0:22:44.080
<v Speaker 2>just say so. Yeah, no, it's yeah. So that's why

0:22:44.119 --> 0:22:48.000
<v Speaker 2>I feel for these women because I can't imagine, you know,

0:22:48.880 --> 0:22:53.440
<v Speaker 2>because I've thankfully only been in a situation like once

0:22:53.480 --> 0:22:55.080
<v Speaker 2>where I was like, oh my god, I remember I

0:22:55.160 --> 0:22:58.119
<v Speaker 2>met this guy at the mall. He was cute, and

0:22:58.200 --> 0:23:00.040
<v Speaker 2>I gave him my number and we were like, I

0:23:00.200 --> 0:23:02.560
<v Speaker 2>was gonna hang out, and I made a mistake of

0:23:03.240 --> 0:23:05.160
<v Speaker 2>like I was young. I had to be like eighteen

0:23:05.359 --> 0:23:08.240
<v Speaker 2>or something, and he said, oh, he picked me up.

0:23:08.440 --> 0:23:09.840
<v Speaker 2>I was like, oh, I've got to go to the

0:23:09.840 --> 0:23:12.639
<v Speaker 2>house to get my wallet. I forgot it, so, being dumb,

0:23:13.119 --> 0:23:16.200
<v Speaker 2>I said sure, so went to his apartment to get

0:23:16.240 --> 0:23:18.680
<v Speaker 2>his quote unquote wallet. And I knew it was gonna

0:23:18.680 --> 0:23:20.879
<v Speaker 2>be some trouble when he locked the door, not like

0:23:20.960 --> 0:23:23.199
<v Speaker 2>locked it like you can't get out, but like, what

0:23:23.240 --> 0:23:24.280
<v Speaker 2>do you need to lock the door for? If you

0:23:24.320 --> 0:23:26.479
<v Speaker 2>get me your wallet? I remember thinking like, oh, snap.

0:23:27.119 --> 0:23:29.480
<v Speaker 2>And I remember being like, oh hey, he's like sit down,

0:23:29.480 --> 0:23:31.520
<v Speaker 2>make itself comfortable. It was it was a studio. There

0:23:31.520 --> 0:23:33.399
<v Speaker 2>was no place to sit but the bed, so I

0:23:33.440 --> 0:23:35.520
<v Speaker 2>sat like at the edge of the bed and he

0:23:35.640 --> 0:23:37.320
<v Speaker 2>came out of the room like he went to the bathrooms,

0:23:37.320 --> 0:23:38.919
<v Speaker 2>like I just got to go the bathroom, Mandy. He

0:23:38.960 --> 0:23:42.920
<v Speaker 2>came out naked, and I was like, oh, you were hurried, yes,

0:23:43.040 --> 0:23:46.080
<v Speaker 2>And I remember thinking to myself, honestly, I remember thinking

0:23:46.119 --> 0:23:49.040
<v Speaker 2>to myself, I've never been raped before. I'm gonna be

0:23:49.119 --> 0:23:51.359
<v Speaker 2>raped today. Like I remember, I was literally like bracing

0:23:51.400 --> 0:23:54.960
<v Speaker 2>myself for it's gonna happen to me, Like okay, you

0:23:55.800 --> 0:23:58.720
<v Speaker 2>have to brace yourself and he got on like the

0:23:58.800 --> 0:24:02.000
<v Speaker 2>bed behind me, like so he's laying and I'm literally

0:24:02.080 --> 0:24:04.479
<v Speaker 2>I mean, I could not have set more on the

0:24:04.600 --> 0:24:06.239
<v Speaker 2>edge of the bed, and I don't know what he

0:24:06.280 --> 0:24:08.199
<v Speaker 2>was doing behind me. The TV was on and we

0:24:08.280 --> 0:24:11.160
<v Speaker 2>sat like that for like an hour. He said nothing.

0:24:11.200 --> 0:24:13.560
<v Speaker 2>I said nothing, and I was just like, what is happening,

0:24:13.640 --> 0:24:15.800
<v Speaker 2>Like I don't know what he was waiting for, don't

0:24:15.840 --> 0:24:18.200
<v Speaker 2>I don't know, And so nothing happened. I literally sat

0:24:18.240 --> 0:24:19.880
<v Speaker 2>at the edge and he was behind me. I don't

0:24:19.880 --> 0:24:21.719
<v Speaker 2>know if he was touching himself. I don't know. And

0:24:21.760 --> 0:24:23.480
<v Speaker 2>then finally he was like, oh, right's gonna be ready

0:24:23.520 --> 0:24:26.080
<v Speaker 2>to go, And I said, yup, because I was afraid

0:24:26.080 --> 0:24:28.320
<v Speaker 2>to run to the door because I didn't know if

0:24:29.160 --> 0:24:31.800
<v Speaker 2>if something in me and now I look back on it,

0:24:32.280 --> 0:24:35.560
<v Speaker 2>some people like to chase, and so something in me

0:24:35.600 --> 0:24:37.720
<v Speaker 2>said don't move. You know that, like if I would

0:24:37.720 --> 0:24:39.280
<v Speaker 2>have ran to the door and tried to unlock the

0:24:39.320 --> 0:24:41.280
<v Speaker 2>lock and get the key, that he would have like

0:24:41.480 --> 0:24:44.280
<v Speaker 2>attacked me. And so me not saying anything and not moving,

0:24:44.359 --> 0:24:46.320
<v Speaker 2>it was like, Okay, he was bored with this is

0:24:46.359 --> 0:24:48.280
<v Speaker 2>not the gay. I can't wrestle her to the ground.

0:24:48.359 --> 0:24:50.320
<v Speaker 2>She's not moving, she's not crying, she's not anything. I

0:24:50.359 --> 0:24:55.040
<v Speaker 2>just didn't say anything. And so we last and I remember,

0:24:55.200 --> 0:24:56.720
<v Speaker 2>you know, him saying that, oh, I'll dropped you off,

0:24:56.720 --> 0:24:58.760
<v Speaker 2>and I had him like my drop me off like

0:24:58.840 --> 0:25:00.960
<v Speaker 2>four blocks away from like where I live, Like okay,

0:25:00.960 --> 0:25:04.200
<v Speaker 2>this is my house. Okay by what And it was

0:25:04.240 --> 0:25:05.960
<v Speaker 2>a time of Beeber's and then he like paid me,

0:25:06.160 --> 0:25:08.000
<v Speaker 2>was like hey, let's see you again. Of course I

0:25:08.000 --> 0:25:11.760
<v Speaker 2>ignored it. Then he started going ballistic paging and calling

0:25:11.840 --> 0:25:14.440
<v Speaker 2>and calling. It was crazy, like I know you live,

0:25:14.520 --> 0:25:16.160
<v Speaker 2>I can come to your house at any time. I'm like, yeah,

0:25:16.200 --> 0:25:18.960
<v Speaker 2>go to that house if you want to. I don't live.

0:25:19.920 --> 0:25:23.200
<v Speaker 2>But I remember thinking to myself, yo, first and last

0:25:23.760 --> 0:25:26.280
<v Speaker 2>of putting myself in a position like that because of

0:25:26.359 --> 0:25:28.680
<v Speaker 2>like me being like dumb, So yeah.

0:25:28.520 --> 0:25:32.680
<v Speaker 1>Well you dumb, you know, be nice. You were young.

0:25:32.800 --> 0:25:34.840
<v Speaker 1>I mean, you don't want to blame yourself at the

0:25:34.960 --> 0:25:37.480
<v Speaker 1>end of the day, he's the creep, that's true, But.

0:25:37.480 --> 0:25:39.720
<v Speaker 2>I just mean like putting as a woman, like I

0:25:39.800 --> 0:25:42.720
<v Speaker 2>had to like really recognize that, like I have to

0:25:42.760 --> 0:25:45.000
<v Speaker 2>be on guard because I grew up pretty sheltered. I

0:25:45.040 --> 0:25:47.480
<v Speaker 2>never had to really be on guard before. And it honestly,

0:25:47.560 --> 0:25:51.760
<v Speaker 2>wasn't the first time, like it was. I recognized that

0:25:51.760 --> 0:25:55.159
<v Speaker 2>that in college. I learned that if you agree to

0:25:55.240 --> 0:25:57.119
<v Speaker 2>go to a guy's room, then it was like you

0:25:57.160 --> 0:26:00.600
<v Speaker 2>were sending a silent message to many men that like

0:26:00.800 --> 0:26:02.680
<v Speaker 2>oh I'm down for with the get down. And it

0:26:02.720 --> 0:26:05.880
<v Speaker 2>took me a while, like like I can remember going

0:26:05.880 --> 0:26:08.040
<v Speaker 2>on guy's room thinking we're gonna study and like he's like, oh,

0:26:08.119 --> 0:26:09.720
<v Speaker 2>thinking like we're going to make out, and I'm like no,

0:26:10.080 --> 0:26:12.399
<v Speaker 2>And he wasn't like particularly mad, but he was surprised, like, well,

0:26:12.440 --> 0:26:15.280
<v Speaker 2>why'd you come? And I'm like, what is that the thing? Like,

0:26:15.560 --> 0:26:17.000
<v Speaker 2>So if I come to your room, that means that

0:26:17.040 --> 0:26:19.320
<v Speaker 2>I'm agreeing to at the very least make out. And

0:26:19.359 --> 0:26:23.400
<v Speaker 2>so I just stopped going to anyone's woman. I remember

0:26:23.440 --> 0:26:25.919
<v Speaker 2>asking my male friends and they were like, well kind of,

0:26:26.400 --> 0:26:28.359
<v Speaker 2>I'm like, now i'm older, I'm like, that's rape culture.

0:26:28.840 --> 0:26:30.879
<v Speaker 2>If I agree, you know, if I be to study,

0:26:30.920 --> 0:26:33.199
<v Speaker 2>it's your room, I'm not agreeing to make out with you.

0:26:34.000 --> 0:26:36.760
<v Speaker 2>So yeah, it's And I remember just telling my sister

0:26:36.800 --> 0:26:38.679
<v Speaker 2>when she went away to school, like you know, after me,

0:26:38.800 --> 0:26:41.680
<v Speaker 2>like just kind of giving her like the rundown of

0:26:41.720 --> 0:26:44.800
<v Speaker 2>like you know, just being very mindful of her surroundings

0:26:45.119 --> 0:26:49.520
<v Speaker 2>of like not going to anyone's room because for whatever reason,

0:26:49.920 --> 0:26:52.160
<v Speaker 2>studying in a room means, hey, you're likely to get

0:26:52.160 --> 0:26:55.760
<v Speaker 2>some sex from me. So yeah, yeah, whocha. I just

0:26:56.080 --> 0:26:58.840
<v Speaker 2>I like, I just remember thinking. I can't even remember,

0:26:58.880 --> 0:27:00.960
<v Speaker 2>like just thinking back, like I really was like, you're

0:27:00.960 --> 0:27:04.280
<v Speaker 2>gonna be raped today, that's it's happening. Oh, I'm so

0:27:04.400 --> 0:27:07.880
<v Speaker 2>glad what I said. Nightmares for like weeks. Of course,

0:27:07.880 --> 0:27:09.439
<v Speaker 2>I didn't want to tell my parents because I was like,

0:27:09.520 --> 0:27:11.119
<v Speaker 2>they're gonna be like, you're never allowed I was never

0:27:11.160 --> 0:27:14.159
<v Speaker 2>allowed out anyway, you know. So I was like they're like,

0:27:14.160 --> 0:27:16.000
<v Speaker 2>you're never gonna be allowed out. So I didn't tell anyone.

0:27:16.040 --> 0:27:18.280
<v Speaker 2>I just was like and then, you know, I remember

0:27:18.320 --> 0:27:22.719
<v Speaker 2>now I saw him a couple of years later, like downtown,

0:27:23.560 --> 0:27:26.639
<v Speaker 2>and like he cursed me out. I think it was

0:27:26.680 --> 0:27:28.560
<v Speaker 2>just crazy now that I look back at it, and

0:27:28.600 --> 0:27:31.199
<v Speaker 2>he was like, oh I remember you, you stupid this

0:27:31.240 --> 0:27:33.000
<v Speaker 2>and that I was just like yeo, okay, And I

0:27:33.040 --> 0:27:35.439
<v Speaker 2>just remember him like walking down the street yelling behind

0:27:35.480 --> 0:27:37.960
<v Speaker 2>me and like other men looking and I'm never thinking

0:27:38.000 --> 0:27:41.040
<v Speaker 2>to myself, wow, so you're not gonna say anything to him.

0:27:41.119 --> 0:27:46.439
<v Speaker 2>You know, I just yeah, sometimes people can be the

0:27:46.520 --> 0:27:49.760
<v Speaker 2>absolute worst. I see why people are afraid when they

0:27:49.800 --> 0:27:51.760
<v Speaker 2>have daughters because not gonna say that men can't go

0:27:51.840 --> 0:27:55.520
<v Speaker 2>through it. But I feel like women are so vulnerable physically,

0:27:55.640 --> 0:27:55.840
<v Speaker 2>you know.

0:27:56.280 --> 0:27:59.280
<v Speaker 1>I feel like I've been so lucky, Like I acknowledge

0:27:59.280 --> 0:28:01.600
<v Speaker 1>how lucky I am. All the travel I've done, all

0:28:01.640 --> 0:28:04.199
<v Speaker 1>the like close calls I've had, I've haven't any issues.

0:28:04.200 --> 0:28:05.600
<v Speaker 1>But you know what, I don't feel like that's made

0:28:05.640 --> 0:28:07.240
<v Speaker 1>me like a I don't think I'm going to be

0:28:07.280 --> 0:28:10.000
<v Speaker 1>a relaxed parent because I was so lucky. I think

0:28:10.000 --> 0:28:13.320
<v Speaker 1>I'm gonna be even more strict. I'm gonna be like

0:28:13.720 --> 0:28:16.359
<v Speaker 1>I was lucky. You're going to be like I use

0:28:16.440 --> 0:28:17.160
<v Speaker 1>up all the luck.

0:28:18.680 --> 0:28:21.000
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, right, Because they say, isn't it one of four

0:28:21.040 --> 0:28:25.400
<v Speaker 2>women or one of three women are sexually like assaulted

0:28:25.480 --> 0:28:25.960
<v Speaker 2>or raped?

0:28:26.720 --> 0:28:28.560
<v Speaker 1>That sounds right? I don't. I don't know what the

0:28:28.600 --> 0:28:30.640
<v Speaker 1>statistic is, but it's a lot of it's a lot

0:28:30.680 --> 0:28:34.000
<v Speaker 1>of women. But thank you for sharing that story.

0:28:34.880 --> 0:28:36.760
<v Speaker 2>No, you're welcome. I mean, you know, I think everybody

0:28:36.840 --> 0:28:41.000
<v Speaker 2>has to be on there, like on their guard I mean, thankfully,

0:28:41.040 --> 0:28:42.880
<v Speaker 2>you know, I've got a good boot now, and honestly,

0:28:43.160 --> 0:28:45.600
<v Speaker 2>I feel sorry for anybody who wants to step to

0:28:45.640 --> 0:28:48.840
<v Speaker 2>the left or right because Superman does a lot of things,

0:28:48.880 --> 0:28:51.720
<v Speaker 2>but play is not one of them. Like there's times

0:28:51.760 --> 0:28:53.760
<v Speaker 2>I have to be careful because I'm like if I'm complaining,

0:28:53.800 --> 0:28:56.600
<v Speaker 2>like oh, such as such, client, He's like, who where

0:28:56.600 --> 0:28:58.560
<v Speaker 2>do they live? I was like, no, that's not what

0:28:58.600 --> 0:29:00.320
<v Speaker 2>we do. He's like, no, no do they Where did

0:29:00.320 --> 0:29:04.520
<v Speaker 2>they live? It feels so weird because I just I

0:29:04.520 --> 0:29:07.280
<v Speaker 2>grew up like just taking care of myself, so like

0:29:07.760 --> 0:29:10.280
<v Speaker 2>it's weird to have like it's someone And honestly, some

0:29:10.320 --> 0:29:13.040
<v Speaker 2>of the guys I did weren't exactly the most like protective,

0:29:13.520 --> 0:29:15.920
<v Speaker 2>and so they have someone so overly protective. I'm like, no,

0:29:15.960 --> 0:29:19.200
<v Speaker 2>you can't. Are you gonna are you gonna beat them up? No? No, no,

0:29:19.600 --> 0:29:21.800
<v Speaker 2>just just talk. I'm like, you're you're sixty six. I

0:29:21.800 --> 0:29:26.280
<v Speaker 2>don't think talking is what they're gonna see where they see? No,

0:29:26.400 --> 0:29:28.800
<v Speaker 2>And he's not much of a talker. So but it

0:29:28.840 --> 0:29:31.200
<v Speaker 2>feels nice to know, like, ah, you don't want none

0:29:31.200 --> 0:29:33.280
<v Speaker 2>of this, even though I'm not gonna let him, just

0:29:33.360 --> 0:29:34.120
<v Speaker 2>so you know.

0:29:37.880 --> 0:29:40.000
<v Speaker 1>Well, I'm at least I'm glad to see that they

0:29:40.000 --> 0:29:44.040
<v Speaker 1>at least actually fired him. It's a damn shame and

0:29:44.080 --> 0:29:46.440
<v Speaker 1>how and like a third of the board apparently left.

0:29:46.680 --> 0:29:48.560
<v Speaker 1>There's no way they didn't know this. I mean, he

0:29:48.720 --> 0:29:52.640
<v Speaker 1>was settling all these lawsuits all these years. But I mean, Harvey,

0:29:52.680 --> 0:29:55.320
<v Speaker 1>don't worry. You'll probably be our next president. Now it's

0:29:55.360 --> 0:30:00.240
<v Speaker 1>you'll you'll, you'll be fine. It's just really sad. But uh,

0:30:00.280 --> 0:30:02.840
<v Speaker 1>it's and you know, you want to give the advice

0:30:03.040 --> 0:30:05.040
<v Speaker 1>to young women if this happens to you in a

0:30:05.080 --> 0:30:08.000
<v Speaker 1>work area, in a workspace, you know, you know, take

0:30:08.040 --> 0:30:11.880
<v Speaker 1>the complaint to your human resource department, to a superior

0:30:12.000 --> 0:30:15.840
<v Speaker 1>or whatever. It's just really it really and I know

0:30:15.840 --> 0:30:17.320
<v Speaker 1>I don't want to spend too much time on the topic,

0:30:17.320 --> 0:30:20.400
<v Speaker 1>but it really pisses me off because that is so inadequate,

0:30:20.440 --> 0:30:23.480
<v Speaker 1>that advice, Because you know, I've interviewed We did a

0:30:23.520 --> 0:30:26.720
<v Speaker 1>story last year on a young woman who did this exactly,

0:30:26.800 --> 0:30:31.440
<v Speaker 1>went to HR several times and was retaliated against by

0:30:31.440 --> 0:30:35.280
<v Speaker 1>her employer because she went to HR, was demoted, was

0:30:35.320 --> 0:30:39.160
<v Speaker 1>given was given less work, you know. And although she

0:30:39.280 --> 0:30:40.680
<v Speaker 1>ended up doing the same thing a lot of these

0:30:40.720 --> 0:30:45.440
<v Speaker 1>women do, settling a lawsuit out of court with her superior.

0:30:46.040 --> 0:30:48.520
<v Speaker 1>She in order to keep her job, would have had

0:30:48.520 --> 0:30:51.440
<v Speaker 1>to continue working with this creep. They didn't fire him.

0:30:51.520 --> 0:30:54.160
<v Speaker 1>He was still working there, and so in the end

0:30:54.200 --> 0:30:56.560
<v Speaker 1>she still was the one punished. She had to leave.

0:30:56.720 --> 0:30:59.080
<v Speaker 1>She was a single mother, leave her job and go

0:30:59.120 --> 0:31:02.560
<v Speaker 1>find something else. And it's just not a perfect there's

0:31:02.600 --> 0:31:05.040
<v Speaker 1>just no like perfect la la la like happy ending

0:31:05.120 --> 0:31:07.320
<v Speaker 1>to this. I think it's so much the onus is

0:31:07.320 --> 0:31:09.640
<v Speaker 1>on the companies themselves to take action and get rid

0:31:09.720 --> 0:31:12.800
<v Speaker 1>of people who at the top, who are taking advantage

0:31:12.800 --> 0:31:15.560
<v Speaker 1>of their power at the position and power. And I mean,

0:31:15.600 --> 0:31:17.440
<v Speaker 1>I can't say it again, like we need more women

0:31:17.440 --> 0:31:18.440
<v Speaker 1>in places of power.

0:31:18.240 --> 0:31:24.040
<v Speaker 2>Please, for sure. That's the only way, it's the only.

0:31:23.880 --> 0:31:26.080
<v Speaker 1>Way I think it'll it'll stop. And a lot of women,

0:31:26.120 --> 0:31:28.000
<v Speaker 1>not just one, because I think one woman at a

0:31:28.000 --> 0:31:30.760
<v Speaker 1>board table with a bunch of men is not any better.

0:31:31.960 --> 0:31:33.720
<v Speaker 1>We need more and more and more.

0:31:35.000 --> 0:31:39.560
<v Speaker 2>More more. Are we going to talk about, uh.

0:31:39.680 --> 0:31:44.960
<v Speaker 1>Dove, Dov, we can talk? Is this the Danielle Brooks controversy?

0:31:45.960 --> 0:31:49.120
<v Speaker 2>It's no, no, the commercial? Is that what you're talking about?

0:31:49.200 --> 0:31:51.520
<v Speaker 1>Well, daniel books, Yeah, yeah, Well I think I learned

0:31:51.560 --> 0:31:53.800
<v Speaker 1>about it because Danielle Brooks from Orange is the New Black.

0:31:53.880 --> 0:31:56.720
<v Speaker 1>She wrote a column on Lenny Letter about the Dove commercial.

0:31:57.480 --> 0:31:58.800
<v Speaker 1>So I came in it from the back door.

0:31:59.240 --> 0:32:01.760
<v Speaker 2>But okay, because now I just thought, because I'm in

0:32:01.760 --> 0:32:06.360
<v Speaker 2>this this like branding group called like build It branded

0:32:06.440 --> 0:32:09.440
<v Speaker 2>launch It with Arsha Jones, it's my arcials last thing.

0:32:09.440 --> 0:32:12.080
<v Speaker 2>But anyway, someone posts there. People are always posting kind

0:32:12.120 --> 0:32:14.080
<v Speaker 2>of like case studies and like just asking what are

0:32:14.120 --> 0:32:16.480
<v Speaker 2>your thoughts and we try, which I love. What's I

0:32:16.520 --> 0:32:19.440
<v Speaker 2>love about the group is that you try to fix

0:32:20.120 --> 0:32:22.720
<v Speaker 2>other brands kind of like issues in an effort to

0:32:22.720 --> 0:32:24.760
<v Speaker 2>better understand marketing and stuff. So it's a great, like

0:32:24.800 --> 0:32:27.760
<v Speaker 2>you know, kind of like great group. It's mostly women

0:32:27.920 --> 0:32:32.880
<v Speaker 2>and brown women. Now, so yeah, someone posted the still

0:32:32.920 --> 0:32:35.200
<v Speaker 2>shot and I said, what in the heck? This can't

0:32:35.200 --> 0:32:38.920
<v Speaker 2>be real. This can't be real. And then, you know,

0:32:38.960 --> 0:32:41.200
<v Speaker 2>so people were kind of like going in and talking about, like,

0:32:41.240 --> 0:32:43.800
<v Speaker 2>you know, why this is not good, what stuff can do.

0:32:44.680 --> 0:32:47.000
<v Speaker 2>But then I went to go watch the video, the

0:32:47.040 --> 0:32:50.280
<v Speaker 2>actual commercial, and I know this is not super popular

0:32:50.680 --> 0:32:52.160
<v Speaker 2>and I was not gonna post it on my Facebook

0:32:52.160 --> 0:32:53.840
<v Speaker 2>because I don't want people to come for me. But

0:32:53.880 --> 0:32:57.680
<v Speaker 2>the commercial wasn't that bad.

0:32:58.480 --> 0:33:02.080
<v Speaker 1>I know, commercial because I actually haven't. I've only seen screenshots,

0:33:02.120 --> 0:33:03.240
<v Speaker 1>I haven't actually watched it.

0:33:03.560 --> 0:33:06.840
<v Speaker 2>Okay, so the commercial, the purpose of this lotion or

0:33:07.120 --> 0:33:10.120
<v Speaker 2>whatever soap is supposed to show that it can fit

0:33:10.200 --> 0:33:13.880
<v Speaker 2>different skin types. So it's this cute brown girl with

0:33:13.920 --> 0:33:16.840
<v Speaker 2>the bun. She takes off her brown shirt, and as

0:33:16.840 --> 0:33:20.160
<v Speaker 2>she's taken off, she becomes this redhead, this cute redhead

0:33:20.240 --> 0:33:22.760
<v Speaker 2>with like a long ponytail. And then the redhead takes

0:33:22.800 --> 0:33:27.680
<v Speaker 2>off her shirt and she becomes this middle Eastern maybe Hispanic,

0:33:27.840 --> 0:33:31.120
<v Speaker 2>kind of like looking beautiful woman, like long black hair,

0:33:31.320 --> 0:33:33.280
<v Speaker 2>and as that woman takes it off, it's an older

0:33:33.320 --> 0:33:36.040
<v Speaker 2>woman who's really pretty. So it goes from like different

0:33:36.120 --> 0:33:39.600
<v Speaker 2>race and age and of like, hey, this soap can

0:33:39.680 --> 0:33:42.720
<v Speaker 2>help everyone. And so when I saw the commercial in

0:33:42.760 --> 0:33:48.320
<v Speaker 2>its entirety, I was like, oh, although what I thought

0:33:48.400 --> 0:33:51.360
<v Speaker 2>was strange was why did Dove have this screenshot like

0:33:52.600 --> 0:33:54.080
<v Speaker 2>from what I look like? The woman in the group

0:33:54.080 --> 0:33:56.440
<v Speaker 2>who shared it shared it from Dove's page. I'm like,

0:33:56.520 --> 0:33:59.120
<v Speaker 2>this is the most unflattering screenshot because all you're showing

0:33:59.160 --> 0:34:02.920
<v Speaker 2>is a woman black woman slowly unpeeling and becoming a

0:34:02.920 --> 0:34:05.160
<v Speaker 2>white woman. Like I don't know how any.

0:34:05.720 --> 0:34:07.840
<v Speaker 1>Of the people probably just saw the screenshot and made

0:34:07.840 --> 0:34:09.920
<v Speaker 1>a judgment call yes.

0:34:10.360 --> 0:34:13.759
<v Speaker 2>But I guess with all that's going on, even with

0:34:13.840 --> 0:34:17.479
<v Speaker 2>the larger commercial in not being that bad, I don't

0:34:17.520 --> 0:34:21.719
<v Speaker 2>know that that order was a good idea anyway, you know,

0:34:22.040 --> 0:34:28.759
<v Speaker 2>because with all that's happening, and I'm just like dub like, oh,

0:34:28.880 --> 0:34:32.759
<v Speaker 2>it's either a lotion or soap. And honestly, like someone

0:34:32.800 --> 0:34:35.560
<v Speaker 2>said it best, someone said, hey, dev I'm looking at

0:34:35.560 --> 0:34:37.960
<v Speaker 2>the whole commercial, because I was like, no, it's meant

0:34:37.960 --> 0:34:39.520
<v Speaker 2>to show the different when they're like, I got you,

0:34:40.400 --> 0:34:42.640
<v Speaker 2>But did you bring a brown person into the room

0:34:42.719 --> 0:34:48.359
<v Speaker 2>and say hey, thoughts? Honestly, because this could have It's

0:34:48.440 --> 0:34:52.440
<v Speaker 2>just true that if you brought someone brown into the

0:34:52.520 --> 0:34:56.040
<v Speaker 2>room and said thoughts about what you know, someone's going

0:34:56.120 --> 0:34:58.399
<v Speaker 2>to say, I get what you're I get what you're

0:34:58.400 --> 0:35:00.279
<v Speaker 2>trying to do. Oh sorry, this is yeah, I said,

0:35:00.320 --> 0:35:02.640
<v Speaker 2>got it. It was a mosquito, and I said not today.

0:35:02.680 --> 0:35:04.839
<v Speaker 1>It's the little things, right, I.

0:35:04.719 --> 0:35:09.960
<v Speaker 2>Get what you're trying to do here, but it's having

0:35:09.960 --> 0:35:12.640
<v Speaker 2>a brown, black woman turned into a white woman. No

0:35:12.680 --> 0:35:14.600
<v Speaker 2>matter how you slice it, it's not a really it's

0:35:14.640 --> 0:35:17.200
<v Speaker 2>not a good idea, you know, And that I see

0:35:17.200 --> 0:35:18.960
<v Speaker 2>where you're going with, Like, but there has to be

0:35:19.000 --> 0:35:21.799
<v Speaker 2>a better way to illustrate that different skin types and

0:35:21.840 --> 0:35:24.680
<v Speaker 2>skin tones can use this there. I mean, obviously there

0:35:24.680 --> 0:35:27.200
<v Speaker 2>has to be I mean, Rihanna just lost launched penty

0:35:27.480 --> 0:35:30.200
<v Speaker 2>and showed that, like, hey, this is a makeup brand

0:35:30.200 --> 0:35:33.080
<v Speaker 2>that caters to all kinds of women without having to

0:35:33.120 --> 0:35:33.680
<v Speaker 2>do this, you know.

0:35:34.880 --> 0:35:37.319
<v Speaker 1>Hey, yeah, they matched the undershirts to the color of

0:35:37.360 --> 0:35:39.920
<v Speaker 1>their skin, like it's nice. Hey we have undershirts and

0:35:39.960 --> 0:35:42.399
<v Speaker 1>different shades now, Like yeah, I.

0:35:42.480 --> 0:35:45.480
<v Speaker 2>Just was like, so, like I said, the overall outrage,

0:35:45.520 --> 0:35:48.239
<v Speaker 2>I mean, I I the still shot looked terrible, but

0:35:48.400 --> 0:35:52.240
<v Speaker 2>the commercial and its entirety wasn't as bad, although obviously

0:35:52.280 --> 0:35:54.080
<v Speaker 2>it wasn't it wasn't good.

0:35:55.440 --> 0:35:58.400
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, but it's a marketing table. Maybe Yeah, I don't know.

0:35:58.440 --> 0:36:00.000
<v Speaker 1>I honestly I can say if I had seen that,

0:36:00.080 --> 0:36:01.400
<v Speaker 1>I would have raised any alarms.

0:36:02.440 --> 0:36:05.040
<v Speaker 2>I honestly, I can honestly say I probably wouldn't have.

0:36:05.160 --> 0:36:07.440
<v Speaker 2>Because when I saw the commercial, I was like, okay,

0:36:08.360 --> 0:36:10.480
<v Speaker 2>and so I went about my business. And then when

0:36:10.520 --> 0:36:12.440
<v Speaker 2>I saw it blew up. I was like I was

0:36:12.440 --> 0:36:14.839
<v Speaker 2>talking about the same commercial. But then I realized most

0:36:14.840 --> 0:36:17.319
<v Speaker 2>people had never seen the commercial and even then, you know,

0:36:17.400 --> 0:36:19.680
<v Speaker 2>by then they were already so enraged and there was

0:36:19.680 --> 0:36:21.640
<v Speaker 2>really no pulling back. I think most people just were

0:36:21.680 --> 0:36:24.520
<v Speaker 2>reacting to that still because that's still shot is damaging.

0:36:24.840 --> 0:36:26.480
<v Speaker 1>It is, and it's just not the time to be

0:36:26.560 --> 0:36:32.719
<v Speaker 1>making even like even the the perception of any sort

0:36:32.760 --> 0:36:36.560
<v Speaker 1>of like racism or perception of colorism. It's just people

0:36:36.600 --> 0:36:39.040
<v Speaker 1>are just really, we're just all sensitive to it right now.

0:36:39.640 --> 0:36:41.799
<v Speaker 1>But I don't know I'm given Dove a pass, can

0:36:41.840 --> 0:36:44.279
<v Speaker 1>I be, because like Dove does so much for I

0:36:44.320 --> 0:36:45.800
<v Speaker 1>don't know. I think they were one of the earliest

0:36:45.800 --> 0:36:48.880
<v Speaker 1>brands to like have different skin colors, different ages, and

0:36:48.960 --> 0:36:52.440
<v Speaker 1>they're at they try. It's not like I think it

0:36:52.440 --> 0:36:54.440
<v Speaker 1>was even I think it wasn't as dramatic, quite as

0:36:54.520 --> 0:36:57.040
<v Speaker 1>dramatic as like that shame moisture controversy a couple of

0:36:57.080 --> 0:37:01.959
<v Speaker 1>months ago. That's just my I'm playing Devil's Advocate. Send

0:37:01.960 --> 0:37:03.399
<v Speaker 1>me your hate mail, Brandon Bish.

0:37:03.680 --> 0:37:06.239
<v Speaker 2>I know I was gonna say. I know people are

0:37:06.280 --> 0:37:09.000
<v Speaker 2>gonna be like, what like I said, I'm not saying,

0:37:09.000 --> 0:37:12.080
<v Speaker 2>and man, it's not saying that that it was well

0:37:12.120 --> 0:37:14.239
<v Speaker 2>executed or whatever, and not to say that, you know,

0:37:14.280 --> 0:37:16.600
<v Speaker 2>there's not a history obviously. Like I mean, if you

0:37:16.600 --> 0:37:20.320
<v Speaker 2>look at some old old Dove advertisements, like there literally

0:37:20.400 --> 0:37:23.239
<v Speaker 2>is like a little brown baby getting into like Dove

0:37:23.280 --> 0:37:26.160
<v Speaker 2>soap and coming out quote unquote clean and white.

0:37:27.040 --> 0:37:29.560
<v Speaker 1>Yes, yes, but seeing that, Okay, maybe I need to

0:37:29.600 --> 0:37:31.120
<v Speaker 1>brush up on my Dove commercial.

0:37:31.680 --> 0:37:33.799
<v Speaker 2>So there's definitely that. I'm not saying that. I'm just

0:37:33.840 --> 0:37:36.160
<v Speaker 2>saying that, like I think that a lot of the

0:37:36.840 --> 0:37:40.200
<v Speaker 2>backlash is mostly the screenshot, not necessarily the whole commercial,

0:37:40.600 --> 0:37:43.240
<v Speaker 2>and that it's not well executed. And this is what happened.

0:37:43.280 --> 0:37:46.680
<v Speaker 2>It's kind of like my brown break today, but it's

0:37:46.719 --> 0:37:49.320
<v Speaker 2>not well executed. And because to me, there's not enough

0:37:50.080 --> 0:37:56.080
<v Speaker 2>there's not enough people in decision making like rooms to say, hey, yeah,

0:37:56.400 --> 0:37:58.200
<v Speaker 2>that's not really gonna fly.

0:37:59.040 --> 0:38:01.600
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, apparently I shouldn't be in marketing.

0:38:02.400 --> 0:38:03.720
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I'd be like, yeah.

0:38:03.560 --> 0:38:08.400
<v Speaker 1>It's great, Well what yeah an other did you read it?

0:38:08.480 --> 0:38:10.080
<v Speaker 1>How do you feel? Since we're going to be on

0:38:10.360 --> 0:38:13.360
<v Speaker 1>these controversy topics. So, and this is also related to

0:38:13.400 --> 0:38:16.280
<v Speaker 1>like I think, being a person, like being at work

0:38:16.400 --> 0:38:18.719
<v Speaker 1>and all the things happening in our country right now,

0:38:18.880 --> 0:38:23.880
<v Speaker 1>the xenophobia, the racism, the Black Lives matter, the police brutality,

0:38:24.160 --> 0:38:27.720
<v Speaker 1>the NFL protest whatever. All these subject matters are very

0:38:27.760 --> 0:38:31.040
<v Speaker 1>delicate subjects to broach in the workplace, and I think

0:38:31.040 --> 0:38:34.520
<v Speaker 1>we're all seeing the worst of this from Jamille Hill

0:38:34.719 --> 0:38:39.960
<v Speaker 1>at ESPN, who has just fired for her tweets speaking

0:38:40.000 --> 0:38:44.879
<v Speaker 1>out against the Dallas Cowboys owner for his disrespect quote

0:38:44.960 --> 0:38:48.160
<v Speaker 1>unquote of players who have been taking the knee and

0:38:48.320 --> 0:38:50.960
<v Speaker 1>protests of black Lives matter. So she was fired. Remember

0:38:50.960 --> 0:38:53.480
<v Speaker 1>this is the same like as ESPN anchor who Trump

0:38:53.560 --> 0:38:56.560
<v Speaker 1>himself or the Trump White House, I think, came out

0:38:56.600 --> 0:38:59.239
<v Speaker 1>saying that she should be fired when she criticized him,

0:38:59.239 --> 0:39:01.920
<v Speaker 1>called them a white suppersist on air.

0:39:03.840 --> 0:39:08.239
<v Speaker 2>The lot I mean, I personally, I mean, if the

0:39:08.280 --> 0:39:10.040
<v Speaker 2>truth is the truth, call it the truth, you know.

0:39:11.239 --> 0:39:12.920
<v Speaker 2>And I knew that they were because I saw, like,

0:39:12.960 --> 0:39:15.080
<v Speaker 2>you know that, and I knew when I saw, like,

0:39:15.120 --> 0:39:16.680
<v Speaker 2>you know, the story about her tweet, I said, yeah,

0:39:16.680 --> 0:39:21.040
<v Speaker 2>they're gonna let her go because honestly, not because it's right,

0:39:21.120 --> 0:39:24.600
<v Speaker 2>because it's so easy to dispose of brown women like

0:39:24.680 --> 0:39:27.080
<v Speaker 2>who's fighting for you that has any position of power?

0:39:27.840 --> 0:39:30.000
<v Speaker 2>You know, who's the woman above you that says no,

0:39:30.080 --> 0:39:34.520
<v Speaker 2>not today, you know. And so it's just such a shame,

0:39:35.080 --> 0:39:37.680
<v Speaker 2>you know, but I'm just so glad that more and

0:39:37.680 --> 0:39:40.920
<v Speaker 2>more people are willing to speak out despite the consequences,

0:39:41.239 --> 0:39:43.799
<v Speaker 2>you know, because it's almost like after a while, it's

0:39:43.800 --> 0:39:45.880
<v Speaker 2>like you can't fire everyone, you can't let go of everyone,

0:39:45.880 --> 0:39:47.040
<v Speaker 2>you can't dise everyone. You know.

0:39:48.200 --> 0:39:49.920
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, Well, what she was saying is, you know, if

0:39:49.960 --> 0:39:51.720
<v Speaker 1>you just if you don't agree with what the Dallas

0:39:51.800 --> 0:39:55.160
<v Speaker 1>Cowboys founder has done or the owner, then you should boycott,

0:39:56.280 --> 0:39:59.359
<v Speaker 1>boycott their advertisers or whatnot. I don't know, it's it's

0:39:59.480 --> 0:40:01.799
<v Speaker 1>I understand, and like, you know, being a journalist, I

0:40:01.800 --> 0:40:04.399
<v Speaker 1>don't cover like politics, you know, she's in sports. There

0:40:04.480 --> 0:40:07.360
<v Speaker 1>is like this and there. It's been completely blurred. But

0:40:07.400 --> 0:40:10.680
<v Speaker 1>this expectation to be completely unbiased. And I think it's

0:40:10.719 --> 0:40:12.960
<v Speaker 1>really hard when you're when you're a journalist because we're

0:40:13.040 --> 0:40:15.480
<v Speaker 1>human beings and I think we all have to be

0:40:15.480 --> 0:40:17.760
<v Speaker 1>careful in our in our jobs. Just what you say

0:40:17.920 --> 0:40:20.440
<v Speaker 1>on your Twitter feed and on Facebook is can get

0:40:20.480 --> 0:40:24.000
<v Speaker 1>you fired. Like yeah, and it's just it's up to

0:40:24.080 --> 0:40:25.680
<v Speaker 1>the companies. You know, they gave her I think a

0:40:25.719 --> 0:40:27.359
<v Speaker 1>little that they gave her a pass for the first

0:40:27.360 --> 0:40:30.760
<v Speaker 1>transgression and she apologized, and I guess the second time

0:40:31.880 --> 0:40:34.279
<v Speaker 1>it was it was too much, But I think about that.

0:40:34.440 --> 0:40:37.480
<v Speaker 1>I I definitely it. I censor the hell out of myself.

0:40:38.160 --> 0:40:40.239
<v Speaker 1>I don't even tweet hardly anymore because I'm too afraid

0:40:40.280 --> 0:40:42.040
<v Speaker 1>of what I might say, because there's just too much

0:40:42.080 --> 0:40:45.439
<v Speaker 1>I want to say. And I when I put things

0:40:45.480 --> 0:40:49.320
<v Speaker 1>on Facebook, I definitely have my filter for friends only

0:40:49.440 --> 0:40:52.279
<v Speaker 1>except for acquaintances. And acquaintances are like all of my

0:40:52.320 --> 0:40:56.000
<v Speaker 1>work colleagues and relatives and whoever, you know, because I'm

0:40:56.080 --> 0:41:00.360
<v Speaker 1>just I'm trying to be over over protective of my

0:41:00.400 --> 0:41:02.400
<v Speaker 1>own voice so that I don't get myself into trouble.

0:41:02.840 --> 0:41:04.320
<v Speaker 2>No, and I think that too, honestly. I mean, I

0:41:04.560 --> 0:41:07.880
<v Speaker 2>do censor myself, like if it's straight like budget Niste,

0:41:07.920 --> 0:41:10.040
<v Speaker 2>the stuff like you're not gonna see me really talk

0:41:10.080 --> 0:41:12.839
<v Speaker 2>about like politics and stuff on like the budget he's

0:41:12.920 --> 0:41:15.440
<v Speaker 2>on Facebook, or the budget he's on Instagram. Unless I mean,

0:41:15.520 --> 0:41:18.279
<v Speaker 2>every once in a while, on like Instagram, I'm like,

0:41:18.640 --> 0:41:22.239
<v Speaker 2>you know, I will say I'll share something, but like

0:41:22.320 --> 0:41:26.200
<v Speaker 2>my personal page, I'm a lot less, you know, I'm

0:41:26.200 --> 0:41:28.680
<v Speaker 2>a lot more free to share. And even then it's

0:41:28.680 --> 0:41:31.120
<v Speaker 2>still I share my opinion, but in a in a

0:41:31.320 --> 0:41:34.600
<v Speaker 2>more in a careful way, knowing that it's still I'm

0:41:34.680 --> 0:41:38.480
<v Speaker 2>still even though it's Tiffany, you know, there's still my

0:41:38.600 --> 0:41:40.640
<v Speaker 2>brand and my business that's attached to it. But it

0:41:40.680 --> 0:41:43.120
<v Speaker 2>doesn't mean I won't share my displeasure. I will. I'll say,

0:41:43.120 --> 0:41:44.719
<v Speaker 2>you know, this is unfair, this is not right, and

0:41:44.800 --> 0:41:47.120
<v Speaker 2>this is you know, like I you know, but I

0:41:47.239 --> 0:41:51.160
<v Speaker 2>might not share as much on the budget nis the page,

0:41:51.400 --> 0:41:53.880
<v Speaker 2>at least not in that way, you know. But then

0:41:53.920 --> 0:41:56.160
<v Speaker 2>sometimes I'm overwhelmed and I'm like, I don't care, this

0:41:56.280 --> 0:41:58.960
<v Speaker 2>is terrible, you know. And so but even then I'm

0:41:58.960 --> 0:42:01.080
<v Speaker 2>still mindful of like how like you're not going to

0:42:01.080 --> 0:42:02.799
<v Speaker 2>see me, curse that that's just not me anyway. But

0:42:03.239 --> 0:42:05.040
<v Speaker 2>I mean, you know you're not going to see me, curse,

0:42:05.120 --> 0:42:07.520
<v Speaker 2>You're not going to see me, you know, which harm

0:42:07.600 --> 0:42:09.480
<v Speaker 2>upon anyone. You're not going to see that. You know

0:42:09.920 --> 0:42:11.799
<v Speaker 2>you're going to see And just know that if I

0:42:11.800 --> 0:42:13.439
<v Speaker 2>do share something, I thought about it and I looked

0:42:13.440 --> 0:42:14.839
<v Speaker 2>at it and I read it and I read it again,

0:42:15.360 --> 0:42:17.040
<v Speaker 2>you know, because I but I just feel like I

0:42:17.040 --> 0:42:20.520
<v Speaker 2>have to say something, you know. So it's hard because

0:42:21.320 --> 0:42:23.040
<v Speaker 2>you know, these days you have to think to yourself,

0:42:23.040 --> 0:42:26.239
<v Speaker 2>ten years, twenty years from now, you know, what is

0:42:26.320 --> 0:42:28.120
<v Speaker 2>it that I'd like for people to see? And so

0:42:29.160 --> 0:42:31.680
<v Speaker 2>and everyone's I mean, I know there are some people

0:42:31.760 --> 0:42:35.879
<v Speaker 2>who their ministry, you know, for lack of a better word,

0:42:36.080 --> 0:42:40.640
<v Speaker 2>is to disrupt in that way, meaning that they are

0:42:40.680 --> 0:42:45.040
<v Speaker 2>here to be the megaphone and say no, no, no, politics, religion,

0:42:45.080 --> 0:42:48.160
<v Speaker 2>all of that stuff. I say it, and that's their ministry.

0:42:48.200 --> 0:42:50.360
<v Speaker 2>That's that's the way that they make the world better.

0:42:50.800 --> 0:42:53.719
<v Speaker 2>And I commend that and I'm happy for that. But

0:42:54.000 --> 0:42:57.200
<v Speaker 2>I know for me that one of the things that

0:42:57.440 --> 0:43:00.640
<v Speaker 2>my disruption is to say, you go out there and

0:43:00.680 --> 0:43:03.239
<v Speaker 2>you shine a light person, and I will support you.

0:43:03.520 --> 0:43:06.360
<v Speaker 2>But what I do is I try to take women,

0:43:06.520 --> 0:43:09.520
<v Speaker 2>especially women of color, and say, okay, girl, at the

0:43:09.600 --> 0:43:11.439
<v Speaker 2>end of the day, if you don't have no money,

0:43:11.440 --> 0:43:13.600
<v Speaker 2>you don't have no power. So let's get your credit together,

0:43:13.760 --> 0:43:16.120
<v Speaker 2>Let's get you this house, let's get you saving. Let's

0:43:16.400 --> 0:43:20.080
<v Speaker 2>so that's what I actively, that's my activism, is that like,

0:43:20.160 --> 0:43:24.000
<v Speaker 2>if I can teach brown women how to not only

0:43:24.040 --> 0:43:28.000
<v Speaker 2>stabilize their finances but to grow and excel, that is

0:43:28.040 --> 0:43:30.400
<v Speaker 2>where I'm like, that's what I'm working on. You know.

0:43:30.760 --> 0:43:32.440
<v Speaker 2>So sometimes people will be like, go, Tiffy, are you

0:43:32.440 --> 0:43:34.799
<v Speaker 2>gonna comment on that, and I might, but honestly, I

0:43:34.880 --> 0:43:37.879
<v Speaker 2>really that's what I that's my overarching goal. Like I'm

0:43:37.920 --> 0:43:43.080
<v Speaker 2>not teaching financial education because it's not random, it's very

0:43:43.120 --> 0:43:49.000
<v Speaker 2>calculated to cultivate a group of Brown women who are

0:43:49.160 --> 0:43:52.520
<v Speaker 2>not only just financially secure and stable, but who are

0:43:53.280 --> 0:43:56.279
<v Speaker 2>killing it out there. So that way, you know, when

0:43:57.360 --> 0:44:00.960
<v Speaker 2>you know, when the time comes for you to ask

0:44:01.000 --> 0:44:02.919
<v Speaker 2>for a raise, you know, there's a brown girl sister

0:44:03.000 --> 0:44:06.120
<v Speaker 2>sitting behind the big desk. When the time comes for

0:44:06.200 --> 0:44:08.480
<v Speaker 2>you to borrow money, it's a sister sitting there. It's

0:44:08.480 --> 0:44:11.160
<v Speaker 2>what you know what I mean, Like that's really important

0:44:11.200 --> 0:44:14.120
<v Speaker 2>to me, And yeah, that's really important to me. So

0:44:14.160 --> 0:44:29.320
<v Speaker 2>like that's kind of my way of giving back. Yeah. See, yes,

0:44:29.400 --> 0:44:33.080
<v Speaker 2>it's a perfect segue of breaking and boosting, and I

0:44:33.120 --> 0:44:39.280
<v Speaker 2>think I wanna I want to boost the brown women

0:44:39.400 --> 0:44:43.280
<v Speaker 2>who are in those positions. Honestly, every single major contract

0:44:44.200 --> 0:44:47.880
<v Speaker 2>that have gotten except for one, has been because a

0:44:47.960 --> 0:44:51.840
<v Speaker 2>brown woman was in that room fighting for me. Like

0:44:51.880 --> 0:44:53.879
<v Speaker 2>I think of like the major brands that I work with,

0:44:54.000 --> 0:44:57.040
<v Speaker 2>like a Ford or or even like some of the

0:44:57.080 --> 0:45:00.080
<v Speaker 2>TV shows that I'm on now and stuff like and

0:45:00.160 --> 0:45:03.319
<v Speaker 2>I finally get to the space. There's a sister there

0:45:03.320 --> 0:45:05.520
<v Speaker 2>who pulls me to the side and says, girl, I've

0:45:05.520 --> 0:45:07.600
<v Speaker 2>been telling them about you for three years. I've been

0:45:07.600 --> 0:45:10.640
<v Speaker 2>putting together power points and presentations of this and this

0:45:10.680 --> 0:45:12.960
<v Speaker 2>and this and that, and finally they said, well, we'll

0:45:13.239 --> 0:45:16.080
<v Speaker 2>open the door just a little bit and Tiffany, you

0:45:16.160 --> 0:45:18.239
<v Speaker 2>come in and when you smash it, I look at

0:45:18.280 --> 0:45:21.480
<v Speaker 2>them like I told you, and you know, and I

0:45:21.600 --> 0:45:24.600
<v Speaker 2>just wish that. That's why it's so important for us

0:45:24.600 --> 0:45:27.640
<v Speaker 2>to be in those spaces, because I so much of

0:45:27.680 --> 0:45:29.200
<v Speaker 2>what I do I would not be able to do

0:45:29.400 --> 0:45:33.560
<v Speaker 2>without these women who I don't even know advocating for me,

0:45:33.920 --> 0:45:36.600
<v Speaker 2>like they're my sister, cousin, mother, friend, you know. No,

0:45:37.360 --> 0:45:39.120
<v Speaker 2>you know, I can't tell you how many women like

0:45:39.160 --> 0:45:41.560
<v Speaker 2>literally like you know, it'd be something major. And I'm like,

0:45:41.600 --> 0:45:44.040
<v Speaker 2>this was so great. How'd you find me? And they're like, oh,

0:45:44.120 --> 0:45:46.920
<v Speaker 2>Calyssa told us, and I'm like, what's Calyssa? Jess was

0:45:46.920 --> 0:45:50.160
<v Speaker 2>like girl me you know, or like no Tanya told us,

0:45:50.280 --> 0:45:53.920
<v Speaker 2>or no Dreama told us, or what And almost without fail,

0:45:54.120 --> 0:45:56.080
<v Speaker 2>that person will have told me that they've been working

0:45:56.120 --> 0:45:59.799
<v Speaker 2>on it for a number of years. Can you imagine ye,

0:46:00.440 --> 0:46:03.920
<v Speaker 2>and I'm like really, They're like, girl, yes, they've been saying, oh,

0:46:03.960 --> 0:46:06.680
<v Speaker 2>we want someone, we're looking for a finance expert or

0:46:06.719 --> 0:46:08.560
<v Speaker 2>we're looking for this. I'm like, oh, what about Tiffy,

0:46:09.800 --> 0:46:12.879
<v Speaker 2>What about Tiffy Nana? And she was like, year after year,

0:46:12.920 --> 0:46:14.880
<v Speaker 2>I bring you up, I pull up your numbers, I

0:46:14.920 --> 0:46:17.480
<v Speaker 2>show them your growth, I show them you're and you know,

0:46:17.760 --> 0:46:20.720
<v Speaker 2>finally you know, and then your job at my job

0:46:20.960 --> 0:46:23.680
<v Speaker 2>is to kill it when I'm there and to over deliver,

0:46:24.120 --> 0:46:27.120
<v Speaker 2>so that way they can say, see see I told you,

0:46:28.400 --> 0:46:30.360
<v Speaker 2>And so that way it leaves the door open, so

0:46:30.520 --> 0:46:34.080
<v Speaker 2>more more brown ambition folks can can come to the door.

0:46:34.080 --> 0:46:36.160
<v Speaker 2>And I just want to give a brown boost to

0:46:36.200 --> 0:46:39.040
<v Speaker 2>those women who are in those spaces. Like when I

0:46:39.040 --> 0:46:41.959
<v Speaker 2>work with Prudential, it was two brown women that pulled

0:46:42.000 --> 0:46:46.000
<v Speaker 2>me in Prudential. Is I am not the target audience

0:46:46.040 --> 0:46:48.920
<v Speaker 2>for like a Prudential. You know, it's very much an

0:46:48.920 --> 0:46:51.799
<v Speaker 2>old boys club at Prudential for the most part. But

0:46:51.880 --> 0:46:56.360
<v Speaker 2>these women pulled me in on small little assignments that said, Tiffany,

0:46:56.480 --> 0:46:59.200
<v Speaker 2>just kill it, okay, then bigger assignments, Tiffany, just kill it.

0:46:59.200 --> 0:47:01.360
<v Speaker 2>And then it grew and before you know what prudential

0:47:01.440 --> 0:47:04.360
<v Speaker 2>is working with more and more brown influencers and bloggers

0:47:04.400 --> 0:47:08.439
<v Speaker 2>and stuff as relates to personal finance, and so I just, yeah,

0:47:08.680 --> 0:47:12.799
<v Speaker 2>I cannot thank these women enough for one being where

0:47:12.800 --> 0:47:14.840
<v Speaker 2>they are when there are not many of them, and

0:47:14.960 --> 0:47:19.880
<v Speaker 2>being an advocate. Like I did an interview today and

0:47:20.120 --> 0:47:21.440
<v Speaker 2>the woman on the phone, even though she wasn't a

0:47:21.440 --> 0:47:24.319
<v Speaker 2>brown woman, she was a woman. She said, oh my god,

0:47:24.360 --> 0:47:25.759
<v Speaker 2>it was so nice talking to you. She said, they

0:47:25.760 --> 0:47:27.640
<v Speaker 2>wanted me to do an interview, and they had all

0:47:27.640 --> 0:47:29.600
<v Speaker 2>these lists and I was like, no, I refused to

0:47:29.640 --> 0:47:34.239
<v Speaker 2>interview another white man about and I was rowling, and

0:47:34.239 --> 0:47:36.680
<v Speaker 2>she list is the Jewish lady and she was so called.

0:47:36.719 --> 0:47:39.080
<v Speaker 2>We had just a great conversation about kids, about everything,

0:47:39.440 --> 0:47:41.680
<v Speaker 2>and so we were just talking in general. She was like, no,

0:47:41.760 --> 0:47:45.759
<v Speaker 2>when I get the opportunity to write for publication, I'm

0:47:45.800 --> 0:47:48.440
<v Speaker 2>always looking like, are there any people of color? Are

0:47:48.520 --> 0:47:51.920
<v Speaker 2>there any women like they know things too? And that's

0:47:51.960 --> 0:47:55.600
<v Speaker 2>what you need, is that the more of us that

0:47:55.680 --> 0:47:57.520
<v Speaker 2>can be in these spaces, the more of us we

0:47:57.560 --> 0:47:59.520
<v Speaker 2>can pull in. And so yeah, I just want to

0:47:59.520 --> 0:48:02.399
<v Speaker 2>give a brown boost to those women out there who

0:48:02.480 --> 0:48:05.719
<v Speaker 2>are you know, not only like in these spaces, but

0:48:05.800 --> 0:48:09.480
<v Speaker 2>are making it their business to pull other women in amen.

0:48:09.800 --> 0:48:12.640
<v Speaker 1>I endorse, endorse that message.

0:48:14.760 --> 0:48:16.840
<v Speaker 2>So what about you, miss Mandra Are you going to

0:48:16.880 --> 0:48:18.239
<v Speaker 2>boost a break? Oh?

0:48:18.320 --> 0:48:22.560
<v Speaker 1>You know, you know me, let's keep things positive. I'm

0:48:22.560 --> 0:48:24.239
<v Speaker 1>gonna do a boost day.

0:48:24.880 --> 0:48:30.360
<v Speaker 2>Should the shimmy with a twist? Oh? Got so?

0:48:30.480 --> 0:48:34.120
<v Speaker 1>My boost is speaking of putting women of color behind

0:48:34.920 --> 0:48:37.960
<v Speaker 1>in the boardrooms, in the executive suites. I think behind

0:48:37.960 --> 0:48:41.480
<v Speaker 1>the camera is important to case in point. This fabulous

0:48:42.040 --> 0:48:47.080
<v Speaker 1>Chinese producer at Fusion put together this really exceptional video

0:48:47.200 --> 0:48:49.560
<v Speaker 1>on the history of tipping, and I think those two

0:48:49.640 --> 0:48:53.120
<v Speaker 1>things should are related. I don't think that many other

0:48:53.160 --> 0:48:55.080
<v Speaker 1>producers would have cared to look into the history of

0:48:55.120 --> 0:48:58.480
<v Speaker 1>tipping if it weren't a minority woman. So I was

0:48:58.480 --> 0:49:01.480
<v Speaker 1>really excited to see this video by this young producer.

0:49:01.520 --> 0:49:04.640
<v Speaker 1>But I had no idea the history of tipping. I mean,

0:49:05.160 --> 0:49:07.520
<v Speaker 1>I like to consider myself like well educated, but no

0:49:07.560 --> 0:49:10.279
<v Speaker 1>one ever told me tipping goes all the way back

0:49:10.360 --> 0:49:14.600
<v Speaker 1>to slave days or Jim Crow and like the history

0:49:14.640 --> 0:49:20.759
<v Speaker 1>of of African Americans in this country, and like, did

0:49:20.800 --> 0:49:22.840
<v Speaker 1>you see the video? I know I posted on Brand Ambition.

0:49:22.880 --> 0:49:23.960
<v Speaker 1>If you get a chance to watch.

0:49:23.760 --> 0:49:25.399
<v Speaker 2>It, yet no, no, but I know you're talking about

0:49:25.400 --> 0:49:26.240
<v Speaker 2>but I didn't school.

0:49:26.239 --> 0:49:29.920
<v Speaker 1>It's really good. So basically the concept of tipping. You know,

0:49:30.080 --> 0:49:32.920
<v Speaker 1>obviously in Europe there is no tipping, like you just

0:49:33.000 --> 0:49:34.920
<v Speaker 1>like pay whatever you pay. And in many countries, I

0:49:34.920 --> 0:49:36.600
<v Speaker 1>don't know if I don't want to speak for every country,

0:49:36.680 --> 0:49:38.440
<v Speaker 1>but like when you to leave the United States, I'm like, oh,

0:49:38.440 --> 0:49:40.120
<v Speaker 1>this is so nice. No one has to tip it all.

0:49:40.640 --> 0:49:43.600
<v Speaker 1>In our country, you know, waiters and weight staff get

0:49:43.640 --> 0:49:46.200
<v Speaker 1>paid like two dollars minimum wage. I think an hour

0:49:46.320 --> 0:49:49.000
<v Speaker 1>is the federal minimum wage for weight staff, and they're

0:49:49.000 --> 0:49:51.000
<v Speaker 1>supposed to make up the rest of their wages and tipping.

0:49:51.960 --> 0:49:53.920
<v Speaker 1>Back in the day when tipping was made a policy,

0:49:54.200 --> 0:49:56.279
<v Speaker 1>it was a way for employers to get away, to

0:49:56.320 --> 0:49:58.560
<v Speaker 1>get away with not paying black workers, who were mostly

0:49:58.600 --> 0:50:02.239
<v Speaker 1>in service jobs, any money at all. And tipping was

0:50:02.280 --> 0:50:04.400
<v Speaker 1>seen as like something that you would do to someone

0:50:04.719 --> 0:50:08.120
<v Speaker 1>in someone you see is lower than you. Like it

0:50:08.160 --> 0:50:10.640
<v Speaker 1>was it was seen as, oh, you wouldn't tip a

0:50:10.640 --> 0:50:13.840
<v Speaker 1>white waiter, that's rude, you know they you only, but

0:50:13.920 --> 0:50:17.359
<v Speaker 1>you would tip the black waiter because that is that's

0:50:17.400 --> 0:50:21.080
<v Speaker 1>their station. It just it took a long time for

0:50:21.160 --> 0:50:24.239
<v Speaker 1>it to be seen as and of course more more

0:50:24.280 --> 0:50:28.920
<v Speaker 1>and more non minorities taking uh service jobs to be

0:50:29.000 --> 0:50:31.640
<v Speaker 1>seen as okay, we actually need these tips tip well.

0:50:31.960 --> 0:50:34.360
<v Speaker 1>But even today, as the video points out, and I

0:50:35.000 --> 0:50:37.239
<v Speaker 1>don't know why I've never considered this or thought about

0:50:37.239 --> 0:50:40.760
<v Speaker 1>this either, but studies show that people of color, especially

0:50:40.800 --> 0:50:44.040
<v Speaker 1>women of color, in service industries and waiting jobs, get

0:50:44.080 --> 0:50:48.560
<v Speaker 1>tipped significantly less on average than than white weight staff.

0:50:48.920 --> 0:50:51.600
<v Speaker 1>So yeah, I kind of lied. That was more of

0:50:51.640 --> 0:50:54.560
<v Speaker 1>a break, but a boost for the video done by

0:50:54.560 --> 0:51:00.120
<v Speaker 1>a great this Chinese producer, young woman named Isabelle, and

0:51:00.200 --> 0:51:06.120
<v Speaker 1>a break for continued racism messing up our money.

0:51:06.239 --> 0:51:08.720
<v Speaker 2>You know, it's a like I try my best now

0:51:08.760 --> 0:51:11.399
<v Speaker 2>to really tip, like I try to at least get

0:51:11.440 --> 0:51:13.800
<v Speaker 2>you know, like the fifteen per se. I mean not,

0:51:14.040 --> 0:51:16.040
<v Speaker 2>I don't try. I give at least a fifteen percent,

0:51:16.440 --> 0:51:19.279
<v Speaker 2>and then, you know, I really try to tip well,

0:51:19.400 --> 0:51:24.640
<v Speaker 2>like if you were, you know, a good waiter waitress,

0:51:24.719 --> 0:51:27.400
<v Speaker 2>then I you know, I try to be like, oh,

0:51:27.480 --> 0:51:30.440
<v Speaker 2>you know what, here's an extra because you know, you'd

0:51:30.480 --> 0:51:32.680
<v Speaker 2>like to reward good behavior, but at the very least

0:51:32.760 --> 0:51:34.440
<v Speaker 2>get your fifteen twenty percent, you know.

0:51:34.920 --> 0:51:37.160
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, yeah, I have that one friend who you go

0:51:37.200 --> 0:51:39.960
<v Speaker 1>to dinner with and they don't tip. Ugh I did,

0:51:40.040 --> 0:51:41.319
<v Speaker 1>and I stopped going to dinner with her.

0:51:41.400 --> 0:51:43.600
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I was gonna say I stopped honestly, because I mean,

0:51:43.920 --> 0:51:46.320
<v Speaker 2>even when if you don't have enough money to tip,

0:51:46.920 --> 0:51:48.920
<v Speaker 2>then you don't have enough money to eat out, Like

0:51:49.000 --> 0:51:51.560
<v Speaker 2>that's part of it. Like you have to pay for

0:51:51.600 --> 0:51:53.920
<v Speaker 2>the service for someone to bring food to the table

0:51:54.160 --> 0:51:56.279
<v Speaker 2>and bringing your water when you requested. All that kind

0:51:56.320 --> 0:51:59.120
<v Speaker 2>of stuff costs that that tip is to pay for that.

0:51:59.520 --> 0:52:01.239
<v Speaker 2>But I will say, sometimes it's kind of annoying, but

0:52:01.280 --> 0:52:03.120
<v Speaker 2>I get why people do it. Those Have you ever

0:52:03.160 --> 0:52:05.040
<v Speaker 2>been to those restaurants where the tip is included?

0:52:06.719 --> 0:52:09.080
<v Speaker 1>They're they're becoming more of the norm in New York City,

0:52:09.160 --> 0:52:10.680
<v Speaker 1>like a lot of but no, I haven't gone to

0:52:10.719 --> 0:52:11.120
<v Speaker 1>one yet.

0:52:11.640 --> 0:52:13.800
<v Speaker 2>And so the only thing I don't like. I remember

0:52:13.800 --> 0:52:16.640
<v Speaker 2>I went to a restaurant with like it was appairly

0:52:16.719 --> 0:52:17.960
<v Speaker 2>maybe it was like five or six of us. So

0:52:18.160 --> 0:52:21.200
<v Speaker 2>oftentimes if you have like a larger like over four

0:52:21.320 --> 0:52:23.880
<v Speaker 2>or five, sometimes they'll include the tip in the bill.

0:52:24.280 --> 0:52:26.520
<v Speaker 2>But I'm like, tell me, I remember the first time

0:52:26.520 --> 0:52:29.200
<v Speaker 2>it happened, and I was I didn't realize, so we

0:52:29.239 --> 0:52:31.000
<v Speaker 2>were all paying and then I was like, okay, everybody

0:52:31.040 --> 0:52:33.600
<v Speaker 2>your tips, and so we were all gathering additional money

0:52:33.640 --> 0:52:35.799
<v Speaker 2>and then someone happened to look, They're like, wait, the

0:52:35.840 --> 0:52:37.319
<v Speaker 2>tip is on here. We were gonna pay like an

0:52:37.320 --> 0:52:40.879
<v Speaker 2>additional whatever, seventy bucks or whatever. And not to say

0:52:40.920 --> 0:52:42.759
<v Speaker 2>we wouldn't have tipped a little extra, but we were

0:52:42.760 --> 0:52:45.479
<v Speaker 2>gonna do the customary tip. I'm like, uh, that should

0:52:45.520 --> 0:52:49.000
<v Speaker 2>be clearly stated. So people are not double tipping, like

0:52:49.040 --> 0:52:51.040
<v Speaker 2>I mean, it's one thing to tip somebody else, another

0:52:51.080 --> 0:52:54.040
<v Speaker 2>thing to literally double their tip by like one hundred dollars,

0:52:54.080 --> 0:52:57.759
<v Speaker 2>you know. Yeah, so yeah, that's the only thing. But yeah, no,

0:52:57.840 --> 0:52:59.160
<v Speaker 2>I'm a good tipper. Now I have to say I'm

0:52:59.160 --> 0:53:01.960
<v Speaker 2>not gonna lie. And I was not a great tipper.

0:53:02.000 --> 0:53:04.160
<v Speaker 2>I mean I was the bare minimum tipper, but I

0:53:04.239 --> 0:53:06.200
<v Speaker 2>was not like a great like here's a little extra something,

0:53:06.200 --> 0:53:07.759
<v Speaker 2>because I was like I have to take a my

0:53:07.840 --> 0:53:10.960
<v Speaker 2>calculator and be like, okay, four dollars and thirty two

0:53:10.960 --> 0:53:12.960
<v Speaker 2>sent let me give my thirty anybody got two pennies,

0:53:13.120 --> 0:53:17.120
<v Speaker 2>Like that's I tip exactly exactly fifteen. And now I'm like, oh,

0:53:17.160 --> 0:53:20.480
<v Speaker 2>ahead to keep this sixty seven dollars dollars for your troubles.

0:53:20.560 --> 0:53:24.279
<v Speaker 2>You know, Yeah, I'm definitely a better tipper now I try.

0:53:24.320 --> 0:53:26.720
<v Speaker 1>You you tip what you can, but you gotta tip something,

0:53:26.760 --> 0:53:29.240
<v Speaker 1>and don't don't be cheap. It's a couple of bucks.

0:53:29.320 --> 0:53:30.960
<v Speaker 1>Like I don't know, it's a turnoff from you when

0:53:30.960 --> 0:53:33.560
<v Speaker 1>people are like that cheap with their money. Then maybe

0:53:33.600 --> 0:53:36.160
<v Speaker 1>don't order seamless if you don't want to pay two

0:53:36.160 --> 0:53:37.520
<v Speaker 1>dollars for a tip. I don't know.

0:53:39.000 --> 0:53:41.799
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, exactly, and then exactly because I mean, like I said,

0:53:42.200 --> 0:53:44.160
<v Speaker 2>tipping is part of the fact that, like you have

0:53:44.239 --> 0:53:45.080
<v Speaker 2>to pay for service.

0:53:45.400 --> 0:53:46.840
<v Speaker 1>I mean, if you want to, if you want to

0:53:46.840 --> 0:53:48.920
<v Speaker 1>be mad at somebody, be mad at our legislative or

0:53:49.040 --> 0:53:51.560
<v Speaker 1>legislators who haven't changed the laws on and they're still

0:53:51.600 --> 0:53:55.520
<v Speaker 1>allowing people to get paid dirt cheap money for you know,

0:53:55.760 --> 0:53:59.680
<v Speaker 1>these minimum wage waiting wait waitressing and what do you

0:53:59.719 --> 0:54:05.960
<v Speaker 1>call it waitering like wait something staffing jobs, because you know,

0:54:06.000 --> 0:54:08.880
<v Speaker 1>they're allowed to pay two dollars and whatever as a

0:54:08.920 --> 0:54:10.360
<v Speaker 1>minimum wage and then you have to make up the

0:54:10.400 --> 0:54:12.640
<v Speaker 1>money and tips. So if you want to, you know,

0:54:12.760 --> 0:54:14.720
<v Speaker 1>piss somebody, if you want to yell at somebody, don't

0:54:14.760 --> 0:54:17.040
<v Speaker 1>don't not tip the poor person who has to be

0:54:17.160 --> 0:54:19.799
<v Speaker 1>stuck with this minimum wage. You know, send a letter

0:54:19.840 --> 0:54:23.960
<v Speaker 1>to your congressman or woman. Make your voice heard exactly?

0:54:24.239 --> 0:54:24.520
<v Speaker 2>Is that?

0:54:24.680 --> 0:54:26.719
<v Speaker 1>I hope that friend is listening. She knows who she is.

0:54:36.520 --> 0:54:38.799
<v Speaker 2>You always have a good question, Yes we do.

0:54:38.880 --> 0:54:40.640
<v Speaker 1>We have a couple of good questions this week, and

0:54:40.680 --> 0:54:42.200
<v Speaker 1>if you want to send your questions to us, you

0:54:42.200 --> 0:54:45.120
<v Speaker 1>can go to Brown Ambition Podcast dot.

0:54:44.719 --> 0:54:46.879
<v Speaker 2>Com dot com.

0:54:47.040 --> 0:54:49.880
<v Speaker 1>And also if you just want to go straight to

0:54:49.920 --> 0:54:52.760
<v Speaker 1>the source, you can email us at Brown Ambition Podcast

0:54:52.880 --> 0:54:58.319
<v Speaker 1>at gmail dot com dot com. Thanks real quick, We

0:54:58.360 --> 0:55:01.160
<v Speaker 1>have a question from someone who is having some issues

0:55:01.160 --> 0:55:04.200
<v Speaker 1>with her secured credit card and needs our help. Oof

0:55:04.280 --> 0:55:07.160
<v Speaker 1>ooh girl okay. Uh doesn't say if she wants to

0:55:07.200 --> 0:55:10.120
<v Speaker 1>be anonymous or non, so will err on the side

0:55:10.120 --> 0:55:13.879
<v Speaker 1>of just calling her Natalie. Okay. So, Natalie says, I

0:55:13.920 --> 0:55:17.840
<v Speaker 1>opened a five hundred dollars secured credit card with Bank

0:55:17.920 --> 0:55:21.239
<v Speaker 1>of America. Since then, I've been a few days late

0:55:21.280 --> 0:55:25.360
<v Speaker 1>in payments once or twice. I also I also carry

0:55:25.600 --> 0:55:28.960
<v Speaker 1>high balances, but I pay the card three hundred to

0:55:29.000 --> 0:55:32.440
<v Speaker 1>four hundred dollars at a time. The bank hasn't increased

0:55:32.440 --> 0:55:35.960
<v Speaker 1>my credit limit or changed the card to an unsecured card.

0:55:36.440 --> 0:55:39.040
<v Speaker 1>Should I wait for the bank, or should I try

0:55:39.040 --> 0:55:42.120
<v Speaker 1>and increase my own credit by depositing more money onto

0:55:42.160 --> 0:55:45.640
<v Speaker 1>the secured card? Or should I just pay off this

0:55:45.760 --> 0:55:49.560
<v Speaker 1>card and stop using it. What's the best action I

0:55:49.600 --> 0:55:52.239
<v Speaker 1>can take to increase the limit of my card and

0:55:52.360 --> 0:55:54.560
<v Speaker 1>switch it over to an unsecured credit card?

0:55:55.320 --> 0:55:57.920
<v Speaker 2>Ooh ooh chat when you said you would lay a

0:55:57.920 --> 0:55:59.000
<v Speaker 2>couple of times, I said.

0:55:58.760 --> 0:56:03.440
<v Speaker 1>Whooh, the danger zone. This is like it is like,

0:56:03.960 --> 0:56:06.319
<v Speaker 1>this is like the person who's like, so, I saw

0:56:06.360 --> 0:56:08.719
<v Speaker 1>this pill on doctor Oz and it saysn't gonna lose

0:56:08.800 --> 0:56:13.719
<v Speaker 1>fifty pounds. Uh no, don't. Oh, I'm like afraid, you know,

0:56:13.760 --> 0:56:16.480
<v Speaker 1>you don't wanna know. Yeah, this is danger zone. So

0:56:16.960 --> 0:56:20.600
<v Speaker 1>from the sound of your question, I'm I'm hearing that

0:56:20.680 --> 0:56:26.719
<v Speaker 1>you're not quite prepared, perhaps for a unsecured credit card, right,

0:56:26.840 --> 0:56:27.640
<v Speaker 1>is that what you're hearing?

0:56:29.680 --> 0:56:33.439
<v Speaker 2>I you know, the fact that she will pay three

0:56:33.480 --> 0:56:37.279
<v Speaker 2>hundred to four hundred dollars love some lets me know

0:56:37.520 --> 0:56:41.360
<v Speaker 2>that it's not that she's not ready for it, but

0:56:43.280 --> 0:56:45.600
<v Speaker 2>she's probably going about it the wrong way, because if

0:56:45.600 --> 0:56:47.839
<v Speaker 2>she were to say, honestly, I've got this, I've got

0:56:47.840 --> 0:56:49.279
<v Speaker 2>the lit I've got you know, I'm at three or

0:56:49.280 --> 0:56:51.279
<v Speaker 2>four hundred dollars I used on the card, and I

0:56:51.360 --> 0:56:53.920
<v Speaker 2>just can't seem to get ahead. But the fact that

0:56:53.960 --> 0:56:56.520
<v Speaker 2>she's able to pay those love sums like that lets

0:56:56.520 --> 0:57:00.800
<v Speaker 2>me know, Okay, there's money in play. She does have enough,

0:57:01.239 --> 0:57:01.879
<v Speaker 2>you know what I mean.

0:57:02.120 --> 0:57:05.399
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, that's so that's good. Yeah, for people who don't

0:57:05.400 --> 0:57:08.120
<v Speaker 1>know what a secured card is and how it works.

0:57:08.120 --> 0:57:10.000
<v Speaker 1>So the general idea with the secured card is you

0:57:10.040 --> 0:57:13.360
<v Speaker 1>put down a deposit. It's like five hundred dollars. So

0:57:13.400 --> 0:57:15.400
<v Speaker 1>the bank takes your money and says, thank you. Now

0:57:15.440 --> 0:57:17.680
<v Speaker 1>we're going to give you a line of credit quote unquote,

0:57:18.120 --> 0:57:19.800
<v Speaker 1>and you're going to use the money you gave us

0:57:19.840 --> 0:57:21.920
<v Speaker 1>as collateral. So if you don't make your payments, we

0:57:22.000 --> 0:57:23.920
<v Speaker 1>just keep this money and go about our business. But

0:57:24.680 --> 0:57:28.160
<v Speaker 1>if you make payments on time to yourself almost at

0:57:28.160 --> 0:57:30.040
<v Speaker 1>the end of twelve months or however long it is,

0:57:30.280 --> 0:57:32.840
<v Speaker 1>we will give you back your deposit and give you

0:57:32.880 --> 0:57:35.600
<v Speaker 1>the chance in some cases to upgrade to a regular

0:57:35.680 --> 0:57:39.200
<v Speaker 1>credit card unsecured credit card. And all that means is

0:57:39.200 --> 0:57:41.400
<v Speaker 1>that you don't put any money down. They just give

0:57:41.440 --> 0:57:46.400
<v Speaker 1>you the money to borrow without requiring collateral. Yeah, I

0:57:46.440 --> 0:57:47.160
<v Speaker 1>don't call it.

0:57:47.200 --> 0:57:48.800
<v Speaker 2>I call it like a credit card with training wheel.

0:57:48.800 --> 0:57:49.919
<v Speaker 2>That's what I call it. Secure cards.

0:57:50.040 --> 0:57:51.600
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, that sounds about it, and it's a good way

0:57:51.640 --> 0:57:54.600
<v Speaker 1>to build credit. The best way to the best way

0:57:54.640 --> 0:57:56.280
<v Speaker 1>to use it, obviously is to make all your payments

0:57:56.320 --> 0:57:59.360
<v Speaker 1>on time. I hope that these late payments did it

0:57:59.400 --> 0:58:02.120
<v Speaker 1>hurt her credit? You bad? But she's wondering if she

0:58:02.120 --> 0:58:04.959
<v Speaker 1>should because clearly she is her limit is too small

0:58:05.000 --> 0:58:06.640
<v Speaker 1>for her. She wants a card with the higher limit,

0:58:07.240 --> 0:58:09.560
<v Speaker 1>and she wants to know she should keep waiting for

0:58:09.600 --> 0:58:11.640
<v Speaker 1>the bank to increase her limit because it's been over

0:58:11.680 --> 0:58:14.920
<v Speaker 1>a year, she says, or should she just drop this card,

0:58:15.000 --> 0:58:18.280
<v Speaker 1>close it and apply for a regular credit card somewhere else.

0:58:19.200 --> 0:58:21.400
<v Speaker 2>So here's the thing. This is what I suggest, like,

0:58:21.480 --> 0:58:23.680
<v Speaker 2>this is what's going to make a bank make your

0:58:23.680 --> 0:58:25.800
<v Speaker 2>secured cards. So I'll give you example. Superman had a

0:58:25.800 --> 0:58:29.440
<v Speaker 2>secured card with our bank when I met him. He

0:58:29.520 --> 0:58:30.880
<v Speaker 2>had it for maybe, like I don't know, maybe like

0:58:30.920 --> 0:58:33.000
<v Speaker 2>eight months or whatever, but it was almost maxed out

0:58:33.040 --> 0:58:35.280
<v Speaker 2>and he was making small payments a month, and I

0:58:35.400 --> 0:58:37.120
<v Speaker 2>was like why, and he thought that's what he was

0:58:37.120 --> 0:58:38.959
<v Speaker 2>supposed to do, until I was like, well, just paid

0:58:39.000 --> 0:58:41.640
<v Speaker 2>off and so he did. A few months later, his

0:58:41.760 --> 0:58:44.760
<v Speaker 2>credit score really jumped up, and so I had him

0:58:45.160 --> 0:58:47.800
<v Speaker 2>put small charges on the card a month and paid

0:58:47.800 --> 0:58:49.800
<v Speaker 2>off in full every month. And by the time the

0:58:49.880 --> 0:58:53.120
<v Speaker 2>end of the year hit they doubled his limits. It

0:58:53.160 --> 0:58:54.920
<v Speaker 2>was five hundred and it was now a thousand or

0:58:54.920 --> 0:58:57.120
<v Speaker 2>something like that. Yeah, nine hundred and twenty thousand. Gave

0:58:57.160 --> 0:59:00.240
<v Speaker 2>him back his deposit and took the secured part off

0:59:00.240 --> 0:59:03.560
<v Speaker 2>the card and become an unsecured regular card. So a bank,

0:59:03.800 --> 0:59:06.720
<v Speaker 2>your bank is looking to see, One, do you make

0:59:06.720 --> 0:59:10.000
<v Speaker 2>on time payments? That's that's the bare minimum if you

0:59:10.000 --> 0:59:12.960
<v Speaker 2>want them to make it a regular card. Two, if

0:59:13.000 --> 0:59:15.880
<v Speaker 2>you really want to increase the likelihood of them making

0:59:15.880 --> 0:59:20.760
<v Speaker 2>their regular card, keep your limit under thirty percent, ideally

0:59:20.800 --> 0:59:24.760
<v Speaker 2>paying it off every month. So I don't know if

0:59:24.760 --> 0:59:28.200
<v Speaker 2>this is your only card, but you know, if you

0:59:28.240 --> 0:59:31.480
<v Speaker 2>can keep if it's a it's a five hundred dollars card,

0:59:31.840 --> 0:59:34.320
<v Speaker 2>you really never want to have a balance over one

0:59:34.400 --> 0:59:37.680
<v Speaker 2>hundred and fifty dollars and ideally pay it off in

0:59:37.760 --> 0:59:40.120
<v Speaker 2>full every month. Is it possible, are you like really

0:59:40.240 --> 0:59:42.400
<v Speaker 2>using using this card? Is it possible just to put

0:59:42.440 --> 0:59:45.320
<v Speaker 2>a small charge like your Netflix account or something on

0:59:45.360 --> 0:59:47.040
<v Speaker 2>this card and pay it off every month. If you

0:59:47.080 --> 0:59:49.080
<v Speaker 2>do that for the next few months, then you can

0:59:49.120 --> 0:59:51.920
<v Speaker 2>approach them and say, hey, you know, I've been really

0:59:51.960 --> 0:59:53.720
<v Speaker 2>good with the card. I paid off in full. You

0:59:53.720 --> 0:59:57.320
<v Speaker 2>know when you know when when will like the secured

0:59:57.360 --> 0:59:59.120
<v Speaker 2>cart be able to be taken off, because you can

0:59:59.120 --> 1:00:01.800
<v Speaker 2>call an ask. You know, typically after a year of

1:00:01.840 --> 1:00:04.920
<v Speaker 2>proper usage, they take it off. But because you've missed

1:00:04.920 --> 1:00:07.000
<v Speaker 2>a couple or you were late a few times, so

1:00:07.040 --> 1:00:10.240
<v Speaker 2>they're still probably keeping their eye on you. So that's

1:00:10.240 --> 1:00:12.480
<v Speaker 2>what I would suggest, is that. And so what I

1:00:12.480 --> 1:00:14.280
<v Speaker 2>would do, and this is what I did for Superman

1:00:14.440 --> 1:00:16.960
<v Speaker 2>is I had him automate. So if I were you,

1:00:17.120 --> 1:00:18.920
<v Speaker 2>so you don't miss payments anymore. If you're able to

1:00:18.920 --> 1:00:20.960
<v Speaker 2>pay a three or four hundred dollars lump sum on

1:00:21.040 --> 1:00:23.880
<v Speaker 2>the secured card, why not on the day that your

1:00:24.040 --> 1:00:27.640
<v Speaker 2>your your balance is due, that you automate a smaller

1:00:28.000 --> 1:00:31.440
<v Speaker 2>payment so you never are late, meaning like let's just

1:00:31.480 --> 1:00:34.720
<v Speaker 2>say your minimum amount is twenty five or thirty five dollars,

1:00:35.040 --> 1:00:38.400
<v Speaker 2>automate the typical minimum amount so that way you know,

1:00:38.520 --> 1:00:40.120
<v Speaker 2>at least I'm not late, even if they didn't pay

1:00:40.120 --> 1:00:41.880
<v Speaker 2>it off in full at least I'm not late, and

1:00:41.920 --> 1:00:43.480
<v Speaker 2>then when you get your lump sum, get your lump

1:00:43.520 --> 1:00:45.520
<v Speaker 2>sum and paid off every month. That's what I'll do,

1:00:45.560 --> 1:00:48.320
<v Speaker 2>at the very least to start to get the process

1:00:48.320 --> 1:00:49.160
<v Speaker 2>going in your favor.

1:00:50.640 --> 1:00:53.240
<v Speaker 1>I agree, I don't know that it's a good idea

1:00:53.520 --> 1:00:55.200
<v Speaker 1>until I don't know that it's a good idea to

1:00:55.280 --> 1:00:58.880
<v Speaker 1>run and open a different credit card, although it's possible

1:00:58.920 --> 1:01:00.960
<v Speaker 1>that she might get approved for a different credit card

1:01:00.960 --> 1:01:04.880
<v Speaker 1>if her credit's improved from the secured card. Behavior do

1:01:04.920 --> 1:01:07.640
<v Speaker 1>you feel like when secure cards upgrade you to another

1:01:08.680 --> 1:01:11.840
<v Speaker 1>the unsecured credit card to like a regular credit card?

1:01:12.040 --> 1:01:14.640
<v Speaker 1>Is it often a good deal? Like are you getting

1:01:15.120 --> 1:01:17.720
<v Speaker 1>are you getting a card with good terms or any like?

1:01:18.000 --> 1:01:20.720
<v Speaker 1>Are there fees? Usually? Like what is what's like a

1:01:20.720 --> 1:01:22.680
<v Speaker 1>step up credit card? Do you know anything about that?

1:01:23.280 --> 1:01:25.040
<v Speaker 2>Well, I mean, I could just tell I could just

1:01:25.040 --> 1:01:28.000
<v Speaker 2>tell you from the experience of Superman that there was

1:01:28.000 --> 1:01:31.880
<v Speaker 2>no additional fee. His interest rate was decent. It was

1:01:31.960 --> 1:01:33.880
<v Speaker 2>kind of an alignment with his score, which was okay

1:01:33.880 --> 1:01:36.160
<v Speaker 2>at the time. It was like maybe like low seven

1:01:36.240 --> 1:01:38.160
<v Speaker 2>hundred ish, And I forget what his interest rate was,

1:01:38.200 --> 1:01:39.880
<v Speaker 2>but I remember comparing it to kind of my interest

1:01:39.920 --> 1:01:43.400
<v Speaker 2>rate and it was decent, and so it's more so

1:01:43.960 --> 1:01:47.000
<v Speaker 2>like even if that's not your usable card. So for example,

1:01:47.040 --> 1:01:49.200
<v Speaker 2>I have credit card. I have a credit card that

1:01:49.240 --> 1:01:52.479
<v Speaker 2>I've had forever that I'm not going to close because

1:01:52.480 --> 1:01:54.360
<v Speaker 2>it helps me with my length of credit history. My

1:01:54.480 --> 1:01:56.080
<v Speaker 2>interest rate is not great, so the only thing that

1:01:56.120 --> 1:01:58.800
<v Speaker 2>goes on that card is my Netflix. And then I

1:01:58.840 --> 1:02:01.520
<v Speaker 2>have another credit card that the interest rate is great,

1:02:02.240 --> 1:02:04.520
<v Speaker 2>and so that's the card that I use. So you

1:02:04.600 --> 1:02:07.840
<v Speaker 2>might have your secured card upgrades itself and that's just

1:02:07.880 --> 1:02:09.960
<v Speaker 2>the kind of the card that you use, like to

1:02:10.120 --> 1:02:13.040
<v Speaker 2>just like prove that you can make a payment every

1:02:13.040 --> 1:02:15.720
<v Speaker 2>month and pay off something every month and then your

1:02:16.040 --> 1:02:18.280
<v Speaker 2>credit is strong enough for you to really apply and

1:02:18.960 --> 1:02:21.360
<v Speaker 2>get qualified for a card with a much better interest rate.

1:02:21.520 --> 1:02:25.960
<v Speaker 2>So sometimes cards can have different usage. So for me

1:02:26.440 --> 1:02:28.560
<v Speaker 2>some you know, like one of my cards is it's

1:02:28.680 --> 1:02:32.000
<v Speaker 2>not really to use, it's just to prove, Hey, Timpany's

1:02:32.000 --> 1:02:33.640
<v Speaker 2>good with cards. She pays it off every month even

1:02:33.640 --> 1:02:37.040
<v Speaker 2>though it's just one small charge. So that's what I

1:02:37.040 --> 1:02:39.360
<v Speaker 2>would I would look into, because you don't necessarily if

1:02:39.400 --> 1:02:41.160
<v Speaker 2>your credit is already taking a hit, I don't know

1:02:41.160 --> 1:02:43.440
<v Speaker 2>that I want you to get an inquiry for applying,

1:02:43.440 --> 1:02:45.520
<v Speaker 2>because every time you apply for credit, whether you get

1:02:45.560 --> 1:02:47.560
<v Speaker 2>it or not, you get a little ding on your

1:02:47.560 --> 1:02:50.240
<v Speaker 2>credit score that brings down your score. You know, a

1:02:50.240 --> 1:02:51.680
<v Speaker 2>few It could be a few points, and it could

1:02:51.720 --> 1:02:54.880
<v Speaker 2>be a number of points, double digit points, depending And

1:02:54.960 --> 1:02:58.720
<v Speaker 2>so I'd rather you massage this card and get upgraded

1:02:58.760 --> 1:03:01.560
<v Speaker 2>without the inquiry, and go and apply for another card

1:03:01.560 --> 1:03:03.720
<v Speaker 2>that you may or not even get and then get

1:03:03.720 --> 1:03:04.160
<v Speaker 2>that ding.

1:03:06.160 --> 1:03:08.840
<v Speaker 1>We have a related question, and I think it highlights

1:03:08.880 --> 1:03:13.360
<v Speaker 1>one of the highlights sort of the importance of shopping

1:03:13.360 --> 1:03:17.120
<v Speaker 1>around even for the best secured card offers, because secured

1:03:17.160 --> 1:03:19.880
<v Speaker 1>cards are an awesome tool to build and improve your credit.

1:03:19.920 --> 1:03:22.120
<v Speaker 1>But some of them have fees. Like I didn't realize this,

1:03:22.480 --> 1:03:24.640
<v Speaker 1>some of them charge monthly fees. We got a question

1:03:24.680 --> 1:03:27.320
<v Speaker 1>from listener Opal a couple of weeks ago, and she said,

1:03:27.320 --> 1:03:29.280
<v Speaker 1>I recently paid off a couple of credit cards. I

1:03:29.280 --> 1:03:31.880
<v Speaker 1>feel really liberated, and I was going I was going

1:03:31.920 --> 1:03:33.560
<v Speaker 1>through them to be sure that all of them had

1:03:33.560 --> 1:03:36.600
<v Speaker 1>a zero balance, but I noticed one card charge is

1:03:36.600 --> 1:03:38.760
<v Speaker 1>a fee of four dollars a month, and I charged

1:03:38.800 --> 1:03:41.880
<v Speaker 1>a four dollar fee even though I had a zero balance.

1:03:42.960 --> 1:03:44.880
<v Speaker 1>I had to email a couple more times with her

1:03:44.920 --> 1:03:46.640
<v Speaker 1>to get to the bottom of it. It is a

1:03:46.680 --> 1:03:50.000
<v Speaker 1>secured card that she has, So the question is should

1:03:50.040 --> 1:03:52.400
<v Speaker 1>I just close out the secured card account or leave

1:03:52.440 --> 1:03:55.320
<v Speaker 1>it open and keep paying this four dollars fee on

1:03:55.360 --> 1:03:57.160
<v Speaker 1>the side.

1:03:58.160 --> 1:04:00.720
<v Speaker 2>If she has other cards, then I would close it.

1:04:00.800 --> 1:04:02.560
<v Speaker 2>I ended up closing mind. So I had I got

1:04:02.600 --> 1:04:05.160
<v Speaker 2>a secured card for my business because it's similar. They

1:04:05.160 --> 1:04:07.160
<v Speaker 2>were like, I applied for a regular card. They were like, uh,

1:04:07.240 --> 1:04:10.000
<v Speaker 2>you tried it, girl. You don't even have any type

1:04:10.000 --> 1:04:12.360
<v Speaker 2>of credit history, and so they were like, but you

1:04:12.400 --> 1:04:14.520
<v Speaker 2>could get a secured card to kind of build your

1:04:14.560 --> 1:04:17.560
<v Speaker 2>business credit history. So I did, and there was a feat.

1:04:17.640 --> 1:04:22.200
<v Speaker 2>It wasn't it wasn't monthly, but it was yearly. And

1:04:22.280 --> 1:04:25.040
<v Speaker 2>I didn't realize that because like it charged and it

1:04:25.080 --> 1:04:26.280
<v Speaker 2>wasn't a little bit. It was like, I don't know,

1:04:26.320 --> 1:04:29.000
<v Speaker 2>maybe like fifty or sixty bucks or something. And so

1:04:29.280 --> 1:04:32.800
<v Speaker 2>I realized, yeah, once I was able to get the

1:04:33.480 --> 1:04:36.200
<v Speaker 2>I was able to get so for whatever reason, the

1:04:36.200 --> 1:04:39.120
<v Speaker 2>business account didn't automatically upgrade to a regular card. I

1:04:39.160 --> 1:04:42.400
<v Speaker 2>had to apply for a whole separate regular card at

1:04:42.400 --> 1:04:44.920
<v Speaker 2>that my same bank. So I got it, and so

1:04:44.960 --> 1:04:46.440
<v Speaker 2>I closed the other car, because I'm like, well, why

1:04:46.440 --> 1:04:47.800
<v Speaker 2>am I going to pay the sixty bucks a month

1:04:47.880 --> 1:04:50.680
<v Speaker 2>or whatever? It was a year when I have my

1:04:50.800 --> 1:04:54.000
<v Speaker 2>regular card at this bank now, So I if it

1:04:54.040 --> 1:04:56.120
<v Speaker 2>was the only card I had, I would maybe wait

1:04:56.600 --> 1:05:00.320
<v Speaker 2>apply for a regular card, so you know, you can

1:05:00.400 --> 1:05:02.880
<v Speaker 2>keep your established credit history, or you can start to

1:05:02.880 --> 1:05:05.160
<v Speaker 2>build credit history with that card. But I would close

1:05:05.200 --> 1:05:08.960
<v Speaker 2>it because if your credit score is good enough for

1:05:09.120 --> 1:05:11.200
<v Speaker 2>a regular card, that you That's really the purpose to

1:05:11.200 --> 1:05:13.680
<v Speaker 2>me of a secured card is to build your credit

1:05:13.840 --> 1:05:16.320
<v Speaker 2>history and credit score. So if it's good enough for

1:05:16.360 --> 1:05:18.960
<v Speaker 2>a regular card, you no longer really need it, especially

1:05:18.960 --> 1:05:20.560
<v Speaker 2>if it's charging you monthly. You know.

1:05:20.960 --> 1:05:30.520
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, all right, we're ready for some wins.

1:05:31.440 --> 1:05:32.960
<v Speaker 2>Wind you go first.

1:05:33.200 --> 1:05:35.440
<v Speaker 1>I'm going to do a win for my Chase Reserve card,

1:05:35.440 --> 1:05:38.919
<v Speaker 1>which is still serving me life two years sent Wait,

1:05:38.920 --> 1:05:42.120
<v Speaker 1>how long has it been? I feel like you, Yeah,

1:05:42.160 --> 1:05:43.840
<v Speaker 1>it was this time last year. I think I got

1:05:43.880 --> 1:05:47.160
<v Speaker 1>my Reserve card paid for the honeymoon trip all the well,

1:05:47.200 --> 1:05:50.400
<v Speaker 1>not the airfare and some other things, but not actually

1:05:50.400 --> 1:05:52.560
<v Speaker 1>the hotels, but for like a good chunk of the honeymoon.

1:05:52.880 --> 1:05:54.800
<v Speaker 1>I've been milking this card all year long, and I

1:05:54.800 --> 1:05:57.920
<v Speaker 1>still have points that we're going to dr like I said,

1:05:57.960 --> 1:06:01.160
<v Speaker 1>and book the I found a better on my hotel

1:06:01.560 --> 1:06:06.000
<v Speaker 1>through Chase Ultimate Rewards than I did online, like even

1:06:06.080 --> 1:06:07.920
<v Speaker 1>on which was I think I got like twenty dollars

1:06:07.960 --> 1:06:11.200
<v Speaker 1>off per night, and then I booked my airfare through them,

1:06:11.240 --> 1:06:13.880
<v Speaker 1>and I'm just the happiest customer. I think it's the

1:06:13.920 --> 1:06:16.360
<v Speaker 1>one like like we said, like there's a four hundred

1:06:16.360 --> 1:06:19.800
<v Speaker 1>and fifty dollars annual fee, but if you can manage it,

1:06:20.680 --> 1:06:23.080
<v Speaker 1>I think it's totally worth it. Because even even after

1:06:23.120 --> 1:06:26.080
<v Speaker 1>I went through that bonus, you know, everyone said, yeah,

1:06:26.160 --> 1:06:28.000
<v Speaker 1>you know with the one hundred thousand point bonus, of

1:06:28.040 --> 1:06:29.520
<v Speaker 1>course you want to get it. But I think if

1:06:29.560 --> 1:06:31.680
<v Speaker 1>you travel a lot and eat out a lot even without,

1:06:32.080 --> 1:06:34.880
<v Speaker 1>that's that crazy high sign on bonus. I think they

1:06:35.120 --> 1:06:39.000
<v Speaker 1>they downgraded it to like what fifty or forty thousand.

1:06:38.800 --> 1:06:40.400
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, something like that. But like, yeah, I got that

1:06:40.440 --> 1:06:43.280
<v Speaker 2>finding both literally like the day before because you were like,

1:06:43.480 --> 1:06:44.560
<v Speaker 2>don't wait.

1:06:44.760 --> 1:06:46.880
<v Speaker 1>Don't wait, because they snatched it. They snashed it out

1:06:46.920 --> 1:06:49.360
<v Speaker 1>real quick. They lost so much money on that. But anyway,

1:06:49.400 --> 1:06:53.040
<v Speaker 1>shout out to finding the credit card that has the

1:06:53.120 --> 1:06:55.400
<v Speaker 1>keys to my heart and just matches me very well,

1:06:55.440 --> 1:06:58.240
<v Speaker 1>and yeah, I think if you even if you travel,

1:06:58.520 --> 1:07:01.680
<v Speaker 1>even if you miss the initial crazy high bonus, but

1:07:01.720 --> 1:07:04.440
<v Speaker 1>if you travel a ton for work or for whatever

1:07:04.480 --> 1:07:06.120
<v Speaker 1>and you're like eating out, I still think it. I

1:07:06.160 --> 1:07:08.200
<v Speaker 1>still think it makes a lot of sense because they

1:07:08.240 --> 1:07:11.680
<v Speaker 1>give you that three hundred dollars travel credit every year,

1:07:12.120 --> 1:07:14.200
<v Speaker 1>and then they give you three points back on like

1:07:14.280 --> 1:07:19.520
<v Speaker 1>dining and travel and you get like TSA pre check

1:07:19.560 --> 1:07:21.600
<v Speaker 1>and Global entry and all that kind of like other perks.

1:07:21.600 --> 1:07:24.760
<v Speaker 1>So yeah, I'm a stand I wonder.

1:07:24.640 --> 1:07:28.400
<v Speaker 2>For the travel credit, like if you don't use it,

1:07:28.880 --> 1:07:29.560
<v Speaker 2>do you lose it?

1:07:30.280 --> 1:07:32.000
<v Speaker 1>Well, you don't have a choice. They just put it.

1:07:32.080 --> 1:07:32.920
<v Speaker 1>They just give it to you.

1:07:33.560 --> 1:07:35.240
<v Speaker 2>Okay, Cassine, it look, I just saw it this year

1:07:35.240 --> 1:07:36.880
<v Speaker 2>and I was just thinking to myself, I didn't use

1:07:36.880 --> 1:07:39.080
<v Speaker 2>it this year yet, and so I'm just like looking

1:07:39.120 --> 1:07:39.280
<v Speaker 2>at you.

1:07:39.920 --> 1:07:41.680
<v Speaker 1>Oh no, I see what you mean. Oh, actually, I

1:07:41.720 --> 1:07:43.880
<v Speaker 1>don't know. I was just yeah, yeah, yeah, I said

1:07:43.880 --> 1:07:47.040
<v Speaker 1>that because I had I happened to book a flight

1:07:47.120 --> 1:07:48.920
<v Speaker 1>the same day that the travel credit was applied, and

1:07:49.000 --> 1:07:50.480
<v Speaker 1>I was like, oh, they just did that so quick.

1:07:51.400 --> 1:07:55.000
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I think I'm gonna yeah, well we'll see. So yeah, no,

1:07:55.080 --> 1:07:56.800
<v Speaker 2>because I did see it on there. I was like, oh,

1:07:57.120 --> 1:07:58.480
<v Speaker 2>there's money on here.

1:07:58.640 --> 1:08:00.400
<v Speaker 1>If you don't spend at least three hundredllar on travel,

1:08:00.440 --> 1:08:03.440
<v Speaker 1>you probably shouldn't have the card in the first place, because.

1:08:03.280 --> 1:08:04.840
<v Speaker 2>So is that? Is that what it does? A cult? No,

1:08:05.000 --> 1:08:06.600
<v Speaker 2>I use it like all the time, And I'm like,

1:08:06.600 --> 1:08:08.520
<v Speaker 2>I'm sure I do, because I use it whenever I

1:08:08.560 --> 1:08:11.000
<v Speaker 2>book flights and stuff. But I saw it recently on

1:08:11.040 --> 1:08:12.240
<v Speaker 2>there and I'm like, wait, how do I have to

1:08:12.240 --> 1:08:12.760
<v Speaker 2>apply this?

1:08:13.600 --> 1:08:16.080
<v Speaker 1>Well, you don't do the applying, like, it just tells

1:08:16.160 --> 1:08:18.840
<v Speaker 1>so whenever you So let's say, you know the clock

1:08:18.920 --> 1:08:22.920
<v Speaker 1>restarts on your travel credit, then you spend twenty dollars

1:08:22.960 --> 1:08:25.160
<v Speaker 1>on Uber, you spend the twenty dollars, and then you'll

1:08:25.200 --> 1:08:27.599
<v Speaker 1>see on your statement it'll be like negative for dollars.

1:08:28.200 --> 1:08:30.040
<v Speaker 2>Okay, yeah, okay, I was gonna say, I was gonna say,

1:08:30.040 --> 1:08:32.840
<v Speaker 2>how did that work? Because yes, I see, because yeah, no,

1:08:33.040 --> 1:08:35.240
<v Speaker 2>that's the card. I've linked to everything, and now I'm

1:08:35.280 --> 1:08:37.280
<v Speaker 2>super excited because I've actually linked it. So I do

1:08:37.320 --> 1:08:40.920
<v Speaker 2>a lot of Facebook marketing and I spend like quite

1:08:40.920 --> 1:08:43.160
<v Speaker 2>a bit amount of money, and so I realized, wait,

1:08:43.200 --> 1:08:45.599
<v Speaker 2>I'm missing out on some money, So I'm gonna link

1:08:45.640 --> 1:08:47.960
<v Speaker 2>that card to my Facebook marketing account, so that way

1:08:48.000 --> 1:08:50.840
<v Speaker 2>I can just be earn and earn and earning, uh

1:08:51.040 --> 1:08:53.439
<v Speaker 2>points on top of points. Because I told Superman, I'm

1:08:53.439 --> 1:08:56.439
<v Speaker 2>like the way this house is looking because i really

1:08:56.479 --> 1:08:58.320
<v Speaker 2>want a dope house, so I'm willing to spend a

1:08:58.360 --> 1:09:00.360
<v Speaker 2>little extra. I was like, we won't be able to

1:09:00.400 --> 1:09:03.439
<v Speaker 2>go on, you know, a nice vacation in a little while,

1:09:03.760 --> 1:09:06.160
<v Speaker 2>but maybe we can earn a nice vacation. So that's

1:09:06.160 --> 1:09:06.519
<v Speaker 2>what really.

1:09:06.960 --> 1:09:10.599
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, it also helps traveling and hurricane season. Not gonna lie.

1:09:11.600 --> 1:09:15.000
<v Speaker 2>Oh that's because it does it. Does it have automatic insurance?

1:09:15.560 --> 1:09:18.439
<v Speaker 1>Uh my? Oh yeah, the Chase card does have has

1:09:18.520 --> 1:09:19.719
<v Speaker 1>really good travelers insurance.

1:09:19.800 --> 1:09:20.040
<v Speaker 2>Yeah.

1:09:20.200 --> 1:09:21.960
<v Speaker 1>I think if there were a weather related thing, I

1:09:21.960 --> 1:09:24.880
<v Speaker 1>think i'd be covered. But luckily, knock on wood things

1:09:24.920 --> 1:09:32.759
<v Speaker 1>you're looking good for us, So I'm excited. You're welcome

1:09:32.840 --> 1:09:33.920
<v Speaker 1>Chase for free advertising.

1:09:34.439 --> 1:09:37.720
<v Speaker 2>Yes, exactly right, somebody from Chase Carlos because I'm not

1:09:37.760 --> 1:09:39.920
<v Speaker 2>I'm not gonna lie, I'm not really a huge Chase fan,

1:09:40.200 --> 1:09:41.880
<v Speaker 2>only because you know, you guys took my house. But no,

1:09:41.960 --> 1:09:44.000
<v Speaker 2>you know, nor feelings whatever.

1:09:43.800 --> 1:09:46.080
<v Speaker 1>You're not alone, I know.

1:09:46.800 --> 1:09:48.599
<v Speaker 2>Well, I mean, other than that, your card is pretty dope.

1:09:50.080 --> 1:09:55.439
<v Speaker 2>My win is Marley Diaz. You remember Marley Daz. She started

1:09:55.439 --> 1:10:00.120
<v Speaker 2>that movement a thousand Black girl books. Oh yeah, yes, so,

1:10:00.200 --> 1:10:02.839
<v Speaker 2>like I know her mom. They all live in like Jersey,

1:10:03.040 --> 1:10:08.120
<v Speaker 2>and her mom has this awesome nonprofit called oh I

1:10:08.160 --> 1:10:11.679
<v Speaker 2>forget the name of her nonprofit, which of course yes

1:10:11.720 --> 1:10:13.400
<v Speaker 2>I know, and it's like really dope because I used

1:10:13.439 --> 1:10:16.439
<v Speaker 2>to volunteer for it. And so every year it's like

1:10:16.439 --> 1:10:19.759
<v Speaker 2>a summer camp for a like empowering young young brown girl.

1:10:19.960 --> 1:10:23.000
<v Speaker 2>So her mom, Janice is awesome, and you know how

1:10:23.000 --> 1:10:27.519
<v Speaker 2>people have like their fifteen minutes of fame. Yes, so well,

1:10:27.520 --> 1:10:30.559
<v Speaker 2>her mom Janis is is a doctor, like a PhD

1:10:31.600 --> 1:10:37.639
<v Speaker 2>and super smart. And her mom is her father because

1:10:37.640 --> 1:10:38.800
<v Speaker 2>I can't even you know, let him out. I just

1:10:38.800 --> 1:10:42.080
<v Speaker 2>don't know him personally. But they've done such an awesome

1:10:42.240 --> 1:10:48.680
<v Speaker 2>job with like really making sure that like Marley is everywhere.

1:10:49.000 --> 1:10:51.479
<v Speaker 2>She spoke at like a Forbes summit. She I mean,

1:10:51.520 --> 1:10:53.519
<v Speaker 2>she's amazing, like as it is like you know, like

1:10:53.560 --> 1:10:56.120
<v Speaker 2>if you speak to her and meet her, but you know,

1:10:56.240 --> 1:10:58.800
<v Speaker 2>sometimes things happen and it's just kind of like, oh,

1:10:58.840 --> 1:11:00.920
<v Speaker 2>you know, there's a flash in the pan, and that

1:11:01.000 --> 1:11:05.599
<v Speaker 2>was so great No, she is still growing so strong,

1:11:06.360 --> 1:11:08.160
<v Speaker 2>I mean so strong. She just wrote a book. Averra

1:11:08.200 --> 1:11:13.320
<v Speaker 2>Duvenet did the forward to it. Yeah, she's interviewing one

1:11:13.320 --> 1:11:16.439
<v Speaker 2>of my publicists, Drina her client who her name is

1:11:16.439 --> 1:11:19.320
<v Speaker 2>Patrice's Color. She is the co founder of Black Lives Matter.

1:11:21.479 --> 1:11:25.160
<v Speaker 2>She's just like, I see this here. She's only twelve,

1:11:25.760 --> 1:11:28.559
<v Speaker 2>and so I think the movement started a year two ago.

1:11:28.640 --> 1:11:31.240
<v Speaker 2>So just imagine the ten eleven year old just like

1:11:31.360 --> 1:11:32.760
<v Speaker 2>and I just love the fact that her mom is

1:11:32.760 --> 1:11:34.960
<v Speaker 2>so supportive, Like, you know, she told her mom, Hey,

1:11:35.000 --> 1:11:37.599
<v Speaker 2>there's not enough brown girl books, you know, and her

1:11:37.600 --> 1:11:39.000
<v Speaker 2>mom's like, what are you gonna do about it? And

1:11:39.040 --> 1:11:41.920
<v Speaker 2>she said, let's collect some and they did. And just

1:11:41.960 --> 1:11:45.160
<v Speaker 2>to see, like how it's evolved. And I think, was

1:11:45.200 --> 1:11:47.760
<v Speaker 2>it I forget it? Was it? Teen Voger one of

1:11:47.840 --> 1:11:51.439
<v Speaker 2>these magazines is like helping her start a magazine to

1:11:51.600 --> 1:11:56.360
<v Speaker 2>encourage other young girls. I mean, just Marlee is just amazing.

1:11:56.479 --> 1:11:58.920
<v Speaker 1>She's living Mandy Woodrof's twelve year old dream. Marley.

1:11:59.560 --> 1:12:02.840
<v Speaker 2>Yes, she just spoke at the Girl Scout convention and

1:12:03.160 --> 1:12:03.800
<v Speaker 2>smashing it.

1:12:04.479 --> 1:12:06.080
<v Speaker 1>Oh my god. I would have been so jealous of

1:12:06.080 --> 1:12:06.920
<v Speaker 1>her if I were twelve.

1:12:07.520 --> 1:12:10.400
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I just Meanwhile, at twelve, I was still like,

1:12:10.720 --> 1:12:13.360
<v Speaker 2>which Barbie? I mean, I don't play with Barbies, but

1:12:13.439 --> 1:12:16.360
<v Speaker 2>kinda I do. I mean what at twelve, I was like,

1:12:16.680 --> 1:12:18.240
<v Speaker 2>I don't even know what I was doing. At twelve,

1:12:18.280 --> 1:12:20.880
<v Speaker 2>I was still trying to figure out like what braids to.

1:12:20.840 --> 1:12:22.679
<v Speaker 1>Get, like, you know, not the beanie babies.

1:12:22.720 --> 1:12:27.559
<v Speaker 2>By twelve, I knew I wasn't doing anything like this.

1:12:27.720 --> 1:12:30.599
<v Speaker 2>And I'm just really proud of her because she's just dope,

1:12:31.120 --> 1:12:34.920
<v Speaker 2>like self aware, self possessed, just you know, just an

1:12:35.000 --> 1:12:39.040
<v Speaker 2>all around awesome young woman with awesome parents. And I'm

1:12:39.080 --> 1:12:40.439
<v Speaker 2>just really proud of her. Like she just popped up

1:12:40.439 --> 1:12:42.640
<v Speaker 2>in my feed and I just said, she truly is

1:12:43.080 --> 1:12:48.040
<v Speaker 2>Brown ambition at its finest. So Marlee, Marlee, And I'm

1:12:48.040 --> 1:12:50.559
<v Speaker 2>gonna ask your mom, you know, should I be blessed

1:12:50.560 --> 1:12:54.120
<v Speaker 2>with a brown baby? So are you teaching her how

1:12:54.160 --> 1:12:56.400
<v Speaker 2>to raise an awesome brown girl lessons? Because I'll take

1:12:56.439 --> 1:12:59.280
<v Speaker 2>those lessons for her. Every parent I know with kids

1:12:59.280 --> 1:13:02.120
<v Speaker 2>that are like amazed, you know, and not like amazing

1:13:02.160 --> 1:13:03.960
<v Speaker 2>and like I push my kid, I'm a soccer I'm

1:13:03.960 --> 1:13:06.479
<v Speaker 2>a helicopter mom. I push my kids kind of way

1:13:06.680 --> 1:13:10.920
<v Speaker 2>just amazing in this like Hey, your kid is well adjusted, happy, smart,

1:13:11.000 --> 1:13:13.600
<v Speaker 2>you know that kind of thing. I'm asking all of them, like,

1:13:13.760 --> 1:13:17.120
<v Speaker 2>so what's your secret? Because you know, if I have

1:13:17.160 --> 1:13:19.880
<v Speaker 2>a little Bambini or Bambino, I want them to be

1:13:20.000 --> 1:13:22.439
<v Speaker 2>happy and you know, but I also want them to

1:13:22.479 --> 1:13:25.160
<v Speaker 2>get trading. He's like, no, honestly, that doesn't it doesn't

1:13:25.160 --> 1:13:27.920
<v Speaker 2>matter to me as much as them being happy. And

1:13:28.120 --> 1:13:32.640
<v Speaker 2>I'm like figuring out like what their gift is and

1:13:32.960 --> 1:13:33.800
<v Speaker 2>living that truth.

1:13:34.280 --> 1:13:38.759
<v Speaker 1>I think they'll already have a leg up. You never know, kids,

1:13:39.320 --> 1:13:42.719
<v Speaker 1>kids could be only their fault if they don't shine.

1:13:44.200 --> 1:13:46.400
<v Speaker 2>I see some kids and I'm like, who are your parents?

1:13:46.640 --> 1:13:51.960
<v Speaker 1>You know, I know, well eighteen long years. You know,

1:13:52.280 --> 1:13:54.400
<v Speaker 1>you could be killing it the first five and really

1:13:54.400 --> 1:13:56.000
<v Speaker 1>mess up the middle ones and they'll still try.

1:13:56.040 --> 1:14:00.280
<v Speaker 2>No, all right, you know okay, ooh, I just just

1:14:00.280 --> 1:14:02.360
<v Speaker 2>wrote me. This is just a little something to end on.

1:14:02.680 --> 1:14:05.439
<v Speaker 2>There's this like psychic lady, this brown psychic woman that

1:14:05.520 --> 1:14:08.000
<v Speaker 2>I follow, although I'm not really sure you know how

1:14:08.080 --> 1:14:10.320
<v Speaker 2>much I believe in life, but I don't know. I

1:14:10.360 --> 1:14:13.840
<v Speaker 2>just feel like anything's prosible. Okay, So she wrote me

1:14:14.400 --> 1:14:16.200
<v Speaker 2>like a nice little message. You know, I'm probably not

1:14:16.200 --> 1:14:17.840
<v Speaker 2>supposed to share, but you know, I'm an overshare. She

1:14:18.000 --> 1:14:20.760
<v Speaker 2>was like, she's sending me. She's like, I have a

1:14:20.800 --> 1:14:24.439
<v Speaker 2>psychic message about pregnancy heading your way late December. You

1:14:24.479 --> 1:14:26.639
<v Speaker 2>need a ton of rest less travel. I'm like, damn it,

1:14:26.960 --> 1:14:28.640
<v Speaker 2>feet up until the sixth of the month. I'm like,

1:14:28.720 --> 1:14:31.880
<v Speaker 2>turn it. I'm like, I'm supposed to go to Australia.

1:14:32.000 --> 1:14:35.840
<v Speaker 2>Cut the stress, even good stress. Oh I hope the

1:14:35.880 --> 1:14:39.960
<v Speaker 2>little one arrives. Wow. And she said he pay close

1:14:39.960 --> 1:14:42.320
<v Speaker 2>attention to your body. So you know, me and Superman

1:14:42.360 --> 1:14:44.000
<v Speaker 2>are trying, like you know, like I actually have a

1:14:44.400 --> 1:14:47.479
<v Speaker 2>you know her, I do well kind of like like

1:14:47.520 --> 1:14:49.479
<v Speaker 2>a lot of my friends like get readings and stuff

1:14:49.479 --> 1:14:50.840
<v Speaker 2>with her. And they was like you should, you should,

1:14:50.840 --> 1:14:53.280
<v Speaker 2>and when she because she does lives and like so

1:14:53.400 --> 1:14:55.479
<v Speaker 2>I watch her lives sometimes and I'll ask a question

1:14:55.680 --> 1:14:58.599
<v Speaker 2>or whatever, so like not like you know, like we've met,

1:14:58.680 --> 1:15:01.439
<v Speaker 2>but like social media I met, like so we're cool enough.

1:15:01.680 --> 1:15:03.479
<v Speaker 2>So she you know, so when she wrote that, I

1:15:03.520 --> 1:15:05.479
<v Speaker 2>was like, cause we're trying. Honestly, I actually have an

1:15:05.520 --> 1:15:09.800
<v Speaker 2>appointment with like doctor h in a couple of weeks

1:15:09.840 --> 1:15:12.800
<v Speaker 2>and then too because I'm thirty eight, well not yet

1:15:12.800 --> 1:15:15.400
<v Speaker 2>in a couple of days. But because I'll be thirty eight,

1:15:15.560 --> 1:15:17.840
<v Speaker 2>like you know, like also looking at like a fertility

1:15:18.120 --> 1:15:20.000
<v Speaker 2>like doctor to like really talk about that.

1:15:20.040 --> 1:15:22.040
<v Speaker 1>You know, you know you're more likely to have twins

1:15:22.160 --> 1:15:24.320
<v Speaker 1>the older you wait, I know.

1:15:24.439 --> 1:15:27.240
<v Speaker 2>You're as Superman is already a twin.

1:15:27.680 --> 1:15:30.720
<v Speaker 1>Oh, I know. I think it's over. Oh I want

1:15:30.760 --> 1:15:31.559
<v Speaker 1>you to have twins.

1:15:31.800 --> 1:15:34.640
<v Speaker 2>Oh that's why he's ginormous. They like broken mother in

1:15:34.680 --> 1:15:36.920
<v Speaker 2>half him and his twin brother. I'm like, I can't

1:15:36.960 --> 1:15:37.519
<v Speaker 2>die and.

1:15:37.439 --> 1:15:39.719
<v Speaker 1>It's all kind of technology. Now you'll be fine.

1:15:40.360 --> 1:15:42.559
<v Speaker 2>Oh my god, I think his daughter was like thirteen

1:15:42.560 --> 1:15:47.000
<v Speaker 2>pounds something like insane. Stop she when he showed me

1:15:47.000 --> 1:15:49.760
<v Speaker 2>her newborn, her newborn picture, she looks like a one

1:15:49.800 --> 1:15:51.160
<v Speaker 2>year old. I was like, how come you don't have

1:15:51.160 --> 1:15:53.400
<v Speaker 2>any pictures of Supergirl as a newborn. He's like that is.

1:15:53.720 --> 1:15:55.760
<v Speaker 2>I'm like no, no, like when she was like born born.

1:15:55.840 --> 1:15:58.040
<v Speaker 2>He's like that is. I'm like no, I mean, yo,

1:15:58.240 --> 1:16:03.080
<v Speaker 2>this this this baby, I swear Mandy. She looks a

1:16:03.240 --> 1:16:05.720
<v Speaker 2>full six to eight months and I'm like, this is

1:16:05.720 --> 1:16:08.400
<v Speaker 2>how she came out of the wall. Me mean, while

1:16:08.400 --> 1:16:11.280
<v Speaker 2>her mother is like, it's like my side. She's not big,

1:16:11.320 --> 1:16:14.000
<v Speaker 2>she's little petite. They're like yeah. He was like yeah,

1:16:14.040 --> 1:16:15.320
<v Speaker 2>it was a lie for her. I was like, oh

1:16:15.360 --> 1:16:18.719
<v Speaker 2>my god, I don't know if I'm ready. Oh, child,

1:16:18.760 --> 1:16:21.280
<v Speaker 2>be careful when you choose ladies. If you get a

1:16:21.280 --> 1:16:22.120
<v Speaker 2>big one, you never know.

1:16:23.200 --> 1:16:23.400
<v Speaker 1>Yah.

1:16:23.479 --> 1:16:25.400
<v Speaker 2>On that note, you never know. Let's be on baby watch.

1:16:25.600 --> 1:16:28.200
<v Speaker 2>Send me your good baby vibes, all that kind of stuff.

1:16:28.240 --> 1:16:29.519
<v Speaker 2>I'm open about it. I'm like, I want to have

1:16:29.520 --> 1:16:30.440
<v Speaker 2>a baby.

1:16:30.560 --> 1:16:33.160
<v Speaker 1>Do some go, do some what you call it with

1:16:33.240 --> 1:16:36.880
<v Speaker 1>the needles on your face. Oh, I'm sure not that much,

1:16:39.400 --> 1:16:40.080
<v Speaker 1>not that much.

1:16:40.160 --> 1:16:40.960
<v Speaker 2>I'm skidding.

1:16:41.000 --> 1:16:43.040
<v Speaker 1>I mean, I just read your horoscope for Leo Libra.

1:16:43.120 --> 1:16:46.519
<v Speaker 1>I think you'll be okay in that department. Everything else

1:16:46.640 --> 1:16:49.519
<v Speaker 1>is let go like god, okay, but the magic of

1:16:49.560 --> 1:16:50.800
<v Speaker 1>the ovaries.

1:16:53.760 --> 1:16:56.360
<v Speaker 2>Right now, Jerome's like, I am out, I'm out, I'm out.

1:16:57.439 --> 1:16:59.920
<v Speaker 2>All right on that note, y'all, it was awesome as usual?

1:17:00.120 --> 1:17:00.280
<v Speaker 2>Was it?

1:17:00.280 --> 1:17:01.639
<v Speaker 1>When I said Overi's was that it.

1:17:03.080 --> 1:17:05.439
<v Speaker 2>It's like, tap it out, tap it out. We should

1:17:05.479 --> 1:17:08.360
<v Speaker 2>give like we should give like a little like well,

1:17:08.360 --> 1:17:10.000
<v Speaker 2>we never know sometimes if we're going to go left.

1:17:10.000 --> 1:17:12.160
<v Speaker 2>Sorry Jerome, next time, I.

1:17:12.120 --> 1:17:14.479
<v Speaker 1>Don't need Jerome hanging over us making us apologize to

1:17:14.520 --> 1:17:18.040
<v Speaker 1>saying overy's Jerome is here. Jerome can stay if he

1:17:18.080 --> 1:17:21.920
<v Speaker 1>would like to stay. If Jerome leaves, because we say overies,

1:17:21.960 --> 1:17:23.599
<v Speaker 1>he doesn't deserve us. That is the true.

1:17:23.680 --> 1:17:25.679
<v Speaker 2>Sure. Oh see this is where I have you around, Leo.

1:17:25.760 --> 1:17:49.200
<v Speaker 2>See that's what the Libra needs.