WEBVTT - "Winner Winner Scissor Dinner - Live from Outside Lands!" 0:00:00.160 --> 0:00:06.840 Hello, my money, it's art in It is too fourteen 0:00:06.880 --> 0:00:11.000 in the morning, um, Sunday night, so I guess it's 0:00:11.039 --> 0:00:14.920 technically Monday morning, but Sunday night, August thirteenth. I am 0:00:15.000 --> 0:00:18.600 in my hotel room in San Francisco, and I'm so 0:00:18.680 --> 0:00:21.880 excited for you guys to listen. I don't want to 0:00:21.880 --> 0:00:25.680 warn you it's probably an audio insanity. There was eight 0:00:25.720 --> 0:00:29.200 mikes on stage, there was chaos, but I just want 0:00:29.200 --> 0:00:35.879 to say it, truly, this podcast today, for all of 0:00:35.880 --> 0:00:39.520 you listeners out there and everybody who showed up, it 0:00:39.640 --> 0:00:43.279 was one of the joys of my life. We were 0:00:43.320 --> 0:00:47.920 at noon in this tent that was truly as beautiful 0:00:47.960 --> 0:00:52.440 and insanity, was purple and velvet and looking plush and 0:00:52.640 --> 0:00:54.960 weird and magical, and we were worried no one would 0:00:55.000 --> 0:00:58.040 come because we know it wasn't even that affordable, and 0:00:59.080 --> 0:01:02.320 we had the best to crowd at outside Land, and 0:01:02.560 --> 0:01:04.559 I just want to say all the guys that flew 0:01:04.640 --> 0:01:07.160 in were such gentlemen. We had so much fun and 0:01:07.200 --> 0:01:10.880 more than anything, I just want to say out loud personally, 0:01:11.800 --> 0:01:14.120 over the last two weeks, off you guys, I'm sorry 0:01:14.200 --> 0:01:16.000 if this is the first time you're listening to the podcast. 0:01:16.040 --> 0:01:17.760 I don't want to freak you out, just know it. 0:01:17.760 --> 0:01:20.840 It's all okay. But you know, this has been a 0:01:21.000 --> 0:01:27.399 very insane two weeks for me, and uh, and I 0:01:27.480 --> 0:01:32.280 don't generally share that much about myself, like personally, and 0:01:32.480 --> 0:01:34.520 I just still have to say the outpouring of love 0:01:34.560 --> 0:01:38.240 I've received and the fucking joy and healing and that 0:01:38.480 --> 0:01:43.880 I felt this weekend. Um, it's truly been a real gift. 0:01:44.120 --> 0:01:47.640 And I've basically canceled everything in my life but this, 0:01:48.640 --> 0:01:52.680 and um, I can't tell you how happy I am. Right, 0:01:52.760 --> 0:01:56.920 my heart is so full, So I please, I hope 0:01:56.960 --> 0:02:01.080 you enjoy this Insanta, and we will. There's a lot 0:02:01.120 --> 0:02:03.760 of stuff that just sounds like craziness, and we will 0:02:03.800 --> 0:02:07.600 have some videos on stage. If there's long musical interludes 0:02:07.640 --> 0:02:12.720 for well, gentlemen are stripping, just get our Facebook page 0:02:13.200 --> 0:02:15.120 and you'll be able to see it. But it was 0:02:15.200 --> 0:02:18.120 just truly one of the highlights of my life. This 0:02:18.200 --> 0:02:21.560 was a joy. And um, I'll stop talking so you 0:02:21.560 --> 0:02:26.280 can get to the madness and our bapslor in Paradise podcast, 0:02:26.360 --> 0:02:28.959 which I could not be more excited to do, will 0:02:28.960 --> 0:02:32.560 be going up on Thursdays, so as you can tell, 0:02:32.600 --> 0:02:35.800 I've lost my voice and it was worth every second. 0:02:35.880 --> 0:02:37.720 So thank you to Outsideline for having us, and thank 0:02:37.760 --> 0:02:39.560 you to everybody who came in. You know what, for 0:02:39.560 --> 0:02:41.560 those of you couldn't come, I get it, girl, I 0:02:41.639 --> 0:02:44.160 get a boo boo, I get a gent So I 0:02:44.200 --> 0:02:46.400 hope you enjoy just a flavor of what we had. 0:02:46.440 --> 0:02:49.600 And my Instagram post is just covered in photos of 0:02:49.720 --> 0:02:54.720 all of them and literally, yeah, Dean, are you fucking 0:02:54.800 --> 0:02:59.679 kidding me? Like I yeah, he's as cute as you see. 0:02:59.720 --> 0:03:04.000 Like you can't not love Dean. Okay, enjoy. Oh and 0:03:04.120 --> 0:03:08.880 if anybody has a video of me getting humped by 0:03:08.960 --> 0:03:13.800 Alex on stage, please posted on our Facebook page. And 0:03:14.440 --> 0:03:18.679 if anybody has a video of Dean getting up by 0:03:18.720 --> 0:03:23.000 Alex on stage, please posted on our Facebook page and 0:03:23.280 --> 0:03:27.839 or email us at Rose Podcast at gmail dot com. Okay, enjoy. 0:03:29.440 --> 0:03:39.680 No entering noticed Stockholm. Yes, Sexy Times at noon in 0:03:39.760 --> 0:03:45.560 the Opium Dead. I'm wow, we're doing this this rule, 0:03:45.680 --> 0:03:53.200 say oh you except this rules into your work. I'll 0:03:53.200 --> 0:03:58.720 take to you so many lawsuits. Get in there, get 0:03:58.760 --> 0:04:08.160 to the pen and to the people. The world is 0:04:08.200 --> 0:04:12.080 my mic on. I was sprained ankle how are you 0:04:12.080 --> 0:04:15.640 going to get back? Okay, we play on this. First 0:04:15.640 --> 0:04:17.880 of all, you guys don't have to keep your voices down. 0:04:17.960 --> 0:04:23.440 You can keep your voices off. Everybody. This is awesome. 0:04:23.480 --> 0:04:26.960 I mean we're it's noon and you guys are like alert, 0:04:27.560 --> 0:04:30.520 it's noon, and in public. It's amazing. My name is 0:04:30.720 --> 0:04:35.160 Arta Marine. This is my platonic lover, Aaron Foley. Thank you. 0:04:36.200 --> 0:04:40.200 How many of you guys have heard the podcast before? Yeah? 0:04:41.920 --> 0:04:43.800 If you're like, how do you get to be an 0:04:43.839 --> 0:04:46.840 adult woman in a palm palm hat and a onesie 0:04:46.960 --> 0:04:51.080 hosting a bachelor podcast, it's because you go through adolescents 0:04:51.240 --> 0:04:54.920 as the hottest girl in school. Check that fucking broad out. 0:04:56.400 --> 0:05:00.719 I did play barbed in my school production of Eaten 0:05:00.760 --> 0:05:05.880 by the Demigorgan. I'm Stranger Things at the Quaker School. 0:05:06.240 --> 0:05:09.279 It was fun. You look fun, collar up, ready for 0:05:09.360 --> 0:05:12.000 a good time. I like about her. She knows she 0:05:12.120 --> 0:05:15.839 looks good. It's like her fucking pop collar. She's like, 0:05:15.839 --> 0:05:19.960 if I'm not fingerbang by noon behind the bleachers, and 0:05:20.040 --> 0:05:27.400 that's true today, if I'm not a little he's here 0:05:27.560 --> 0:05:32.080 and he's so fucking cute. I'm pretty sure he's been 0:05:32.200 --> 0:05:36.919 humped by every bear as Jean Francisco between Dean and Wills. 0:05:37.000 --> 0:05:39.760 You're like, Oh, I gotta catch you. I'm gonna put you. 0:05:40.320 --> 0:05:43.360 Excuse me, how Darrel? Oh my god, there's so many 0:05:43.360 --> 0:05:48.479 fucking hot bachelors. Where do you see Alex's pants? We 0:05:48.640 --> 0:05:50.920 got him here and I did climb him like a 0:05:51.040 --> 0:05:55.040 Reese's monkey. His pants. His pants are spectacular. They took 0:05:55.040 --> 0:05:58.160 a separate flight. His pants are just landed. Uh, we're 0:05:58.200 --> 0:06:01.040 pretty we're pretty excited. Are all of you guys listening 0:06:01.080 --> 0:06:03.760 at home? We're sorry that you can't be here because 0:06:03.800 --> 0:06:07.080 it's truly it's like, make a wish for me. There's 0:06:07.920 --> 0:06:11.280 there's thousands of people here. There's how to fill an 0:06:11.320 --> 0:06:15.000 extension on the tent. There are millions of people here. 0:06:15.040 --> 0:06:18.160 If you guys were listening at home, metallicas like, where 0:06:18.200 --> 0:06:22.520 did everybody go? Metallica has four people? We have three 0:06:22.680 --> 0:06:27.880 thousand people yet side note, side note Metallica just canceled 0:06:27.920 --> 0:06:33.039 you guys. Side note, side note. The saddest thing, guys, 0:06:33.480 --> 0:06:37.560 things I I brought fucking merch and I delivered like 0:06:37.680 --> 0:06:41.520 forty T shirts to the merch tent. If I sell one, 0:06:41.800 --> 0:06:44.880 it's like I could have a Metallica T shirt or 0:06:44.920 --> 0:06:47.040 I could get it. May I touch you? So many 0:06:47.120 --> 0:06:51.719 lawsuits literally not to be sold, but they are going 0:06:51.760 --> 0:06:54.920 to be over at the merch tand truly, truly Metallica 0:06:55.040 --> 0:06:59.520 just bought them all laws, all riches beating off into 0:06:59.520 --> 0:07:07.080 one right name. We're starting off classy classic. I learned 0:07:07.120 --> 0:07:10.880 that the Gorillas are a band, and I saw them 0:07:10.920 --> 0:07:17.720 and that trap called quest canceled twice. But we're here. 0:07:17.880 --> 0:07:25.320 We did not cancel. We got dean motherfucker's We got erin. 0:07:25.400 --> 0:07:29.520 What did we do last night? God hammered we We 0:07:29.720 --> 0:07:34.600 did drink. We sang karaoke. Speaking of drinking, we want 0:07:34.640 --> 0:07:37.320 to bring up We tried to get Horgey the bartender. 0:07:39.120 --> 0:07:42.560 If you notice here we have Ray. Could give a 0:07:42.600 --> 0:07:44.840 shout out to Ray for this gal help me put 0:07:44.880 --> 0:07:48.880 this whole thing together. This morning she cut out raccoons 0:07:48.920 --> 0:07:52.400 and crab. Huge round of applause, you guys, huge round 0:07:52.400 --> 0:07:56.080 of applause. We're gonna bring out we have our own bartender, 0:07:56.480 --> 0:07:59.559 just like just like Jorge, we have a gentleman named 0:07:59.640 --> 0:08:03.960 Jaw with a bespoke handlebar mustache, and he has a 0:08:04.040 --> 0:08:06.600 thimble with my name on it. Josh come on out. 0:08:09.120 --> 0:08:13.680 Look at that. Check your shirt off. Check your fucking 0:08:13.760 --> 0:08:17.000 shirt off. Barbar needs skin? You can you can leave? 0:08:19.080 --> 0:08:21.680 May I touch you? So many lawsuits? Hello, Josh, thank 0:08:21.720 --> 0:08:25.880 you for joining us. May I have a symbol of champagne. 0:08:27.440 --> 0:08:30.640 So we're gonna so it takes for art to get 0:08:31.400 --> 0:08:34.880 Do you guys have alcohol? All right? I guess I'll start. 0:08:35.080 --> 0:08:39.360 Can we pass out if anybody has whatever? Where's our 0:08:39.440 --> 0:08:42.559 drinking game throughout the show? Anytime somebody says bone zone 0:08:42.960 --> 0:08:46.040 or I jump on one of the bachelors, you drink, 0:08:46.160 --> 0:08:49.360 okay and scream drink drink drink. You guys got it. 0:08:49.440 --> 0:08:51.839 Let's practice. Oh I don't know what happened last night. 0:08:51.880 --> 0:08:56.120 I just got into the bone zone with Dean. You 0:08:56.160 --> 0:08:59.640 are my best. University of Phoenix online night school. You're 0:08:59.679 --> 0:09:02.800 all gonna become surgeons law. Thank you so much. Here's 0:09:02.840 --> 0:09:08.880 my thimble Paget, who's backstage being bound. It says just 0:09:09.760 --> 0:09:13.440 it says just a thimbleful. And Paget founded online for me, 0:09:13.520 --> 0:09:18.080 so the bottoms up. Speaking of Paget, let's bring Paget Brewster. 0:09:18.320 --> 0:09:21.439 You know her from Criminal Minds, you know her from 0:09:21.440 --> 0:09:32.480 another period. And a man you know is Kenny f Yeah, yes, yes, yes, 0:09:34.760 --> 0:09:38.920 and a man you know as Kenny Baniel from Sein 0:09:39.000 --> 0:09:55.319 called ladies and gentlemen. Yes, yes, we may want our rights. 0:09:55.400 --> 0:10:00.400 Louder is anybody over thirty? Is anybody over forty? Would 0:10:00.400 --> 0:10:06.320 anyone likes? All right? Thank you so much? All right? 0:10:07.000 --> 0:10:09.800 What would you like to drink? Would vodka? What do 0:10:09.800 --> 0:10:16.960 you want to drink? Last night there was a Christian group. 0:10:18.640 --> 0:10:23.720 I'll have another symbol of champagne. Plea. Okay, well, Paget Stephen. 0:10:24.320 --> 0:10:26.840 Did you guys have fun last night? I did. Yeah, 0:10:26.880 --> 0:10:29.480 we had a great time. Although I can't sing Toxic 0:10:29.559 --> 0:10:33.199 by Britney Spears, that's hard. We did carry we went 0:10:33.240 --> 0:10:37.360 to Dimples in Japan Town. We went to Dimples to 0:10:37.440 --> 0:10:44.360 Japan Town with Kenny and ben Adorable ben Z and Kenny, 0:10:44.400 --> 0:10:46.920 and then we also went with Nick Krall and Nick Thoon. 0:10:47.040 --> 0:10:50.240 It was the weirdest. It was such a glazier and 0:10:50.320 --> 0:10:52.880 Jason Man's two kids, and then there was like four 0:10:53.120 --> 0:10:55.679 random like I don't know if they were Bachelor fans 0:10:55.760 --> 0:10:58.160 or comedy fans there, but they as we all just 0:10:58.240 --> 0:11:01.120 sing karaoke until he closed the PI Stean's wayst size 0:11:01.160 --> 0:11:05.360 the over under his so get your money down, Stephen, 0:11:05.520 --> 0:11:07.880 and you tell me that you also looked like that 0:11:08.120 --> 0:11:12.440 is actually my photo from not We are not So Different. 0:11:12.760 --> 0:11:17.800 I actually lost my vagina in when people say to me, 0:11:18.120 --> 0:11:22.800 nobody picked it up. When people do interview, they're like, oh, 0:11:22.880 --> 0:11:26.400 how do you become a female comedian. It's like exhibit A, 0:11:27.400 --> 0:11:30.880 you don't become a female comedian unless you look like 0:11:30.960 --> 0:11:34.920 that alter middle. Interesting. They cut it off before the 0:11:34.960 --> 0:11:38.959 caption at the bottom that says hello bottom. They don't care, 0:11:39.040 --> 0:11:43.280 they don't they don't believe you. Well, everybody paget Stephen, 0:11:43.320 --> 0:11:45.640 what did you think of the finale of Rachel and 0:11:45.720 --> 0:11:51.559 Brian and Peter? They just wanted a ring, right, she 0:11:51.679 --> 0:11:55.280 just wanted that fucking clap. If you think Brian has 0:11:55.320 --> 0:12:01.880 fake cheeks surgically enhanced. The people that aren't clapping, uh, 0:12:01.920 --> 0:12:06.120 they hadn't seen the program. Because if you program, I'm 0:12:06.120 --> 0:12:09.880 just gonna call it program because I'm eight. How many 0:12:09.880 --> 0:12:12.280 people had a problem with Peter's approach of I won't 0:12:12.280 --> 0:12:17.360 marry you. I mean it's two weeks. I mean, look, 0:12:17.400 --> 0:12:21.200 it is the game. It's the game. But but I 0:12:21.240 --> 0:12:23.720 can see how after two weeks if you're like I guess, 0:12:23.720 --> 0:12:27.320 don't join the Bachelor. Maybe that's not the show for you. 0:12:27.320 --> 0:12:28.720 You gotta speak in of the mike because we're doing 0:12:28.720 --> 0:12:33.720 a podcast. Okay, um, well, are you guys ready to 0:12:33.800 --> 0:12:37.880 get this show started? Let's start out with the bones done, 0:12:37.960 --> 0:12:43.400 shall we? People are doing it. We have young, good 0:12:43.440 --> 0:12:46.920 looking bachelor's with nothing but hopes and dreams. Let's funk 0:12:46.960 --> 0:12:52.280 them up. All right? First up? I consider him my 0:12:52.360 --> 0:12:56.959 future X husband. I consider him my Bachelor franchise boyfriend. 0:12:57.679 --> 0:12:59.880 I think if you guys have ever heard the podcast, 0:13:00.120 --> 0:13:03.680 do you know who my true love is? I dragged 0:13:03.720 --> 0:13:08.599 him here from Nashville after he made cocktails in Mexico, 0:13:09.720 --> 0:13:17.240 my secret boyfriend. Well that well sits in the middle. 0:13:17.640 --> 0:13:23.480 Well sits in the middle. So we slide down. Yes, 0:13:24.400 --> 0:13:31.440 please sit right here, bunny. Yes, everybody, Oh my god? 0:13:31.640 --> 0:13:36.400 By round of applause. Who is still hungover? Nope, this 0:13:36.480 --> 0:13:42.960 is still drunk. This is a responsible crowd. I know. Well, 0:13:43.120 --> 0:13:45.560 you'll look great. Did you miss me? I miss you? 0:13:45.760 --> 0:13:48.560 You did? By the way, this is the fourth time 0:13:48.559 --> 0:13:50.920 moving on this show. Could I just be like a 0:13:50.960 --> 0:13:52.960 part of the castes? When do you just move to 0:13:53.080 --> 0:13:55.920 l a? All right? What you didn't come to karaoke 0:13:56.040 --> 0:13:57.839 with us last night. Well, I know, I'm sorry. And 0:13:57.880 --> 0:14:00.160 then I found that Nick Role was there Roll and 0:14:00.320 --> 0:14:05.560 Raffi Rafie nicksoon Rothie Rock. I saw them at the 0:14:05.920 --> 0:14:09.160 like yeah, sessions, and I wanted to take a picture. 0:14:09.280 --> 0:14:12.959 I texted you that and you were like, not happening, lady, lady, 0:14:13.120 --> 0:14:16.080 Well so you are now it is no secret you 0:14:16.120 --> 0:14:19.440 are the new bartender. Time about when is this going 0:14:19.480 --> 0:14:22.880 to be released? Is it after Monday? It's being released 0:14:22.920 --> 0:14:24.760 as we what are we doing it after Monday? We'll 0:14:24.760 --> 0:14:27.760 do it after Monday. How about that? We'll do it tuesday. Okay, 0:14:27.800 --> 0:14:33.920 we'll do it tuesday. Welles um, I get Jorge fired 0:14:33.960 --> 0:14:41.880 in episode one. That's Paget, Donald Trumpman, Donald Trump, you 0:14:42.040 --> 0:14:46.680 just FaceTime to me for British Columbia. He faces, Okay, 0:14:46.720 --> 0:14:49.440 sent a video. I I sent him a picture. I 0:14:49.480 --> 0:14:51.440 was making puzzole a and I was like, I'm thinking 0:14:51.440 --> 0:14:55.640 of you. The only thing we could eat at the 0:14:55.760 --> 0:14:58.440 at the apply of Sayulita where they shoot Badger in 0:14:58.480 --> 0:15:01.400 Paradise because we got sick on chicken tacos down. Did 0:15:01.440 --> 0:15:06.600 we can patchet one more? Mike? I Paget, did you 0:15:06.800 --> 0:15:09.360 go there on your honeymoon. You went to that. We 0:15:09.400 --> 0:15:12.120 went there for she went just a hotel on her 0:15:12.160 --> 0:15:17.080 honeymoon and befriended Jorge. He was fantastic. He was fantastic, 0:15:17.160 --> 0:15:19.720 the whole staff. It's it's great. It's a true story. 0:15:19.880 --> 0:15:23.520 Is this true? Yeah, that's amazing. Hold on, by the way, 0:15:23.520 --> 0:15:26.360 I love Jorge and I was kidding, but he's Wills 0:15:26.360 --> 0:15:30.360 would never mean that none is great. We think you might. 0:15:30.680 --> 0:15:33.600 Is that the greatest job? Because here's the question, are 0:15:33.640 --> 0:15:37.640 you allowed to hump the contestants or because that way 0:15:37.680 --> 0:15:39.280 you don't get kicked off? Like? Could you make did 0:15:39.320 --> 0:15:41.720 you make out with a twin? I didn't make out 0:15:41.720 --> 0:15:43.800 with the twin? Did you make up with Ashley? I 0:15:44.040 --> 0:15:47.520 she wasn't there. I have been feeling that she's come out. 0:15:47.640 --> 0:15:49.600 Did you make out with Raven? Did you make up 0:15:49.600 --> 0:15:52.200 with Alex the Dolphin? You love Alex a Dolphin. I'm 0:15:52.280 --> 0:15:55.120 jealous of you and Alex a Dolphins. Alexis I've been 0:15:55.160 --> 0:15:57.560 to college. She told me to call her alp with 0:15:57.600 --> 0:16:02.760 her eyes. I'm just so you guys dating? Yes, No, 0:16:02.920 --> 0:16:06.560 we're not. Did you make out with anyone in Paradise? 0:16:06.680 --> 0:16:13.280 You got to watch this show? Did you did you 0:16:13.320 --> 0:16:19.600 get into the bone. Yeah? Okay, Um, if anybody needs 0:16:19.600 --> 0:16:21.680 a drink from Josh do let's take a drink. One 0:16:21.760 --> 0:16:24.040 drink request? Does anybody want to cock the man with 0:16:24.120 --> 0:16:28.600 the glasses? What would you like from joshers fingers driver? 0:16:29.120 --> 0:16:31.360 What's your name? Love? Sarah is going to get a 0:16:31.400 --> 0:16:35.280 drink from Josh's screw driver. More to calm, morn, calm, alcoholics, 0:16:35.400 --> 0:16:40.040 keep it down. Okay. So who knew there'd be eight 0:16:40.120 --> 0:16:42.840 hundred people here at noon? Oh my god? What a crowd? 0:16:42.920 --> 0:16:45.320 What a crowd? Who is feeling so insecure right now? 0:16:46.320 --> 0:16:49.480 I feel like this is like Trump's inauguration, where we're 0:16:49.520 --> 0:16:53.880 just like inflating the numbers. This is just millions of 0:16:53.960 --> 0:16:57.280 people here. I am just like Melania. I am dead 0:16:57.320 --> 0:17:04.240 inside blanket. You need help get out of dystopieum ten 0:17:04.400 --> 0:17:07.119 without having to screw a business man. I don't know 0:17:07.119 --> 0:17:11.680 how it's gonna happen. Um well question. So so I 0:17:11.720 --> 0:17:14.719 think to me, it's that you being the bartender feels 0:17:14.720 --> 0:17:17.240 like the best position. I mean, like you got to 0:17:17.280 --> 0:17:19.320 go and be funny and hang out. I thought it 0:17:19.359 --> 0:17:21.520 was awesome. Yeah, did you have a good time? But 0:17:21.640 --> 0:17:24.800 we haven't seen it yet. Yeah, no, be honest. To 0:17:24.800 --> 0:17:27.040 be honest, it was the best job. No one's ever 0:17:27.080 --> 0:17:29.800 done it, right, Like, no one's ever been a contestant. 0:17:30.119 --> 0:17:31.960 And then like got to like kind of be a 0:17:31.960 --> 0:17:34.119 part of the show, like Harrison was never like on 0:17:34.160 --> 0:17:36.560 the Bachelor, and then became the host. So it was 0:17:36.720 --> 0:17:38.800 it was kind of impressing. Ended. So they were like, well, 0:17:39.080 --> 0:17:41.320 to see what happens. And most people just go on 0:17:41.480 --> 0:17:44.000 with the rest of their lives, all right. Not me. 0:17:45.320 --> 0:17:51.359 I'm gonna ride this way forever. Like you guess what 0:17:51.560 --> 0:17:53.439 catch raise? Do you guess what cat? Let me just 0:17:53.480 --> 0:17:56.359 say that. And I don't know how the lighting is 0:17:56.400 --> 0:17:59.280 in here, but there's no one more heati sexual than me. Right, 0:18:00.280 --> 0:18:02.160 But let me tell you, if I ever hop over 0:18:02.240 --> 0:18:04.840 that gave fence, I want to land on fucking well. 0:18:05.119 --> 0:18:08.720 That's what I want. That's gold. I want you to 0:18:08.760 --> 0:18:10.760 know that that young man up there just feel like 0:18:10.840 --> 0:18:13.840 the same right to that young boy is hoping to. 0:18:14.240 --> 0:18:16.040 My people would say it to my mother in the 0:18:16.080 --> 0:18:19.080 general store in little Compton, Rhode Island to January and 0:18:19.200 --> 0:18:21.920 there would go, I wouldn't polite, young gentleman you have 0:18:22.000 --> 0:18:24.160 about me. I am going to close on her mother 0:18:25.200 --> 0:18:30.040 true story. Okay, so you're doing stand up now? Wells, yeah, apparently, no, 0:18:30.160 --> 0:18:32.680 I'm not. You're not. Is that like a rumor that's 0:18:32.720 --> 0:18:35.440 going Z said you did like fifteen minutes for them 0:18:35.440 --> 0:18:38.679 in Mexico? Oh yeah, well, aren't you just like to 0:18:38.720 --> 0:18:42.679 torch your friends? So I used to. We We can talk 0:18:42.720 --> 0:18:46.840 about when when the show stopped because just speck the 0:18:46.880 --> 0:18:50.879 fresh drake and every everyone was freaking out. And I 0:18:50.920 --> 0:18:53.760 remember we all I got together and the cameras stopped rolling, 0:18:54.040 --> 0:18:56.679 and it was just like a weird vibe. And so 0:18:56.760 --> 0:18:59.399 I was like, I'll tell you guys a story. And 0:18:59.400 --> 0:19:03.920 then I just told a story about an embarrassing sexual moment, 0:19:04.040 --> 0:19:07.480 and it was was it with me? Oh my god, 0:19:07.640 --> 0:19:10.680 thank god, Jojo? And then she sent me home. Oh 0:19:10.760 --> 0:19:14.560 my god? Can I tell you we were watching you. 0:19:14.760 --> 0:19:21.480 I felt like Fireman's outfit didn't fit. We have memories 0:19:21.680 --> 0:19:24.600 that made you relatable. If you had fainted in that 0:19:24.640 --> 0:19:27.200 Fireman's outfit, or if you had stuck your landing with 0:19:27.359 --> 0:19:31.560 that kiss at your basso of me, Will's based me. 0:19:33.119 --> 0:19:37.120 Thank you. How brutal that is to be like waiting 0:19:37.200 --> 0:19:40.399 for the kiss and then it happens, and then she's like, 0:19:40.600 --> 0:19:43.280 we go to dinner and she's like, You're the greatest 0:19:43.320 --> 0:19:46.760 guy in the world, and I've been waiting for this kiss. Yeah, now, 0:19:46.840 --> 0:19:50.800 get the funk out of here right now? Do you 0:19:50.880 --> 0:19:53.239 kissed her on a slippy slide? I know, I know 0:19:53.280 --> 0:19:55.439 it was. I said to patch you lust and I 0:19:55.520 --> 0:19:57.480 got Two years ago, I got taken out to Benny 0:19:57.520 --> 0:20:00.520 Hannah in Oxnard, California. I don't want to brag. I 0:20:00.560 --> 0:20:03.520 got dry hot nearest drawberry Field and never called again. 0:20:03.560 --> 0:20:05.280 And I don't know what I did. So it's a 0:20:05.280 --> 0:20:09.680 similar story that was last fall and the person you 0:20:09.840 --> 0:20:15.080 dry hot me Chris Harrison. Very gentle, lover, I want 0:20:15.960 --> 0:20:18.720 very gentle. Oh my god, Anna, how are we doing 0:20:18.800 --> 0:20:24.159 on time? Four minutes? Okay, all right, we get it. 0:20:24.280 --> 0:20:28.240 Everyone loves twink is out here right now. You will 0:20:28.280 --> 0:20:33.480 not disrespect my twink. I caught him and I've captured him. 0:20:33.480 --> 0:20:36.919 He's been under my floorboards. Fruit lady. We've got four minutes, 0:20:36.960 --> 0:20:41.480 all right, minutes four minutes, just so you know he's 0:20:41.480 --> 0:20:44.080 the closer, So just settle in. What do you need 0:20:44.119 --> 0:20:48.080 to drink? Honey? You like the over under. Bring this 0:20:48.119 --> 0:20:54.040 girl a drink right now to take my god, you 0:20:54.080 --> 0:21:03.080 got your wristband? Are you fucking kidding me? Katie? Will 0:21:03.080 --> 0:21:09.399 you play baracouta? Katie? Will you play baracouta? Oh my god? 0:21:09.560 --> 0:21:14.680 Where did Dean go? She's bringing the drink. Oh Dan, 0:21:20.920 --> 0:21:26.400 You're simple, it's all. We're all gonna be electrocuted here. 0:21:26.480 --> 0:21:39.960 We got right there, deed. Just so you know, I'm 0:21:40.040 --> 0:21:48.159 rooted us. Your time's where are you ken? There's fifty 0:21:48.800 --> 0:21:54.160 people ahead creating out right now cheese. Thousand people are 0:21:54.200 --> 0:21:57.680 going crazy. Oh my god. They just had to take 0:21:57.720 --> 0:22:02.879 the roof off the tent and build a new roof. Well, 0:22:03.359 --> 0:22:07.919 I'm dropping the wayside to ways Did you see what 0:22:08.040 --> 0:22:11.400 we'll go get to that? He's wearing like vans. He's 0:22:11.400 --> 0:22:15.120 wearing vans with his Who knows what happened to Dean 0:22:15.200 --> 0:22:18.720 since he landed in San Francisco. It's a dusty it's 0:22:18.720 --> 0:22:22.160 a dusty place here and outside land the boys basically 0:22:22.200 --> 0:22:25.880 wearing kids and he's got his big toe poking through 0:22:25.920 --> 0:22:30.560 the hole. Something has happened to Dean in San Francisco. 0:22:30.680 --> 0:22:33.360 Only a man that pretty he can have his toe 0:22:33.480 --> 0:22:37.120 coming out of a shoe and everyone's like, oh, I 0:22:35.880 --> 0:22:42.360 know what I'm gonna baby beorn and have I'm squeezed 0:22:42.359 --> 0:22:46.119 my kids? Can you can you tell us that people 0:22:46.280 --> 0:22:49.800 find the people find love and b I P yeah, 0:22:49.920 --> 0:22:53.720 there is, there's some I will say this that, Um, 0:22:54.119 --> 0:22:59.879 this show is going to be different. Um because because 0:23:00.080 --> 0:23:03.440 the because we had like squashed so much filming into 0:23:03.640 --> 0:23:08.720 like what happened. I didn't hear anything about why anything 0:23:10.800 --> 0:23:14.960 what happened when you put hot messes into an imagine 0:23:15.040 --> 0:23:18.120 when you put to Mario and Karen and the cameras 0:23:18.119 --> 0:23:21.000 an alcohol, I can't imagine where that something went wrong. 0:23:21.359 --> 0:23:25.480 I was told that hot Russian chick would be here Christina. 0:23:25.840 --> 0:23:36.280 Yeah she hasn't. She has here. I've been here all time, 0:23:37.359 --> 0:23:44.679 all time, right here, guys, give me a piece of 0:23:44.760 --> 0:23:51.960 card rolle. So um, answer your question. Um, I would 0:23:51.960 --> 0:23:53.480 say that this season is going to be a lot 0:23:53.560 --> 0:23:56.200 funnier than and the show is funny anyways, but the 0:23:56.240 --> 0:23:59.879 best show on because there is it was squashed down, 0:24:00.119 --> 0:24:02.520 there was there's not a ton of like love stories, 0:24:02.560 --> 0:24:05.160 so there's a lot of like funny stories. It's gonna 0:24:05.160 --> 0:24:07.320 be the best season ever. Do you guys, do you 0:24:07.359 --> 0:24:11.919 guys love Paradise? I mean when you heard it was 0:24:12.000 --> 0:24:14.680 back You're like, I can fucking wake up in the morning. 0:24:14.720 --> 0:24:19.280 I okay, you guys, wells, Will you stay out here 0:24:19.320 --> 0:24:22.199 because you're our Bachelor liaison? No, I'm gonna stay out 0:24:22.200 --> 0:24:24.800 here because I'm now a part of your show. All right. 0:24:26.520 --> 0:24:30.400 Do you think that Wills and I have chemistry? Right? 0:24:31.000 --> 0:24:33.160 It's good? Right? But he didn't come out last night 0:24:33.160 --> 0:24:35.480 and I texted him in a solo text and he 0:24:35.640 --> 0:24:37.560 kind of was like, I'm not coming, and I thought, 0:24:37.640 --> 0:24:42.640 I get it all right anyway, moving up before I 0:24:42.680 --> 0:24:49.960 need I need a number Thumble, a number thumble thing 0:24:50.040 --> 0:24:52.680 I got her on eBay holds less can come me 0:24:52.720 --> 0:24:56.960 out of anything? What's that bunney? She doesn't even hold 0:24:57.000 --> 0:24:59.199 an ounce of liquor and you've already spilled half of 0:24:59.200 --> 0:25:01.320 it on the floor. Did you so much? Guess who? 0:25:01.359 --> 0:25:05.960 I guess you sprained your ankle yesterday. Can send in 0:25:06.000 --> 0:25:07.119 the morning. They don't want to know. It will make 0:25:07.160 --> 0:25:10.200 them sad. Go for it. Don't feel sad. I'm doing okay, guy, 0:25:10.800 --> 0:25:13.040 She's fine. But she texted this to me at thirty 0:25:13.080 --> 0:25:17.639 in the morning. I say, not bad for a girl 0:25:17.720 --> 0:25:20.480 with a sprained ankle. No, I can't. I can't read 0:25:20.480 --> 0:25:25.720 that it's they know though you can say it. Here's 0:25:25.720 --> 0:25:27.919 the thing. Is it gonna bump you out when you 0:25:28.000 --> 0:25:32.720 hear real life text me not bad for a girl 0:25:32.760 --> 0:25:34.920 with sprained ankle, a dead dad, and day for of 0:25:34.960 --> 0:25:37.880 a z back. My dad died two weeks ago. Don't 0:25:37.880 --> 0:25:39.560 be sad, guys, because I'm here and this is my 0:25:39.600 --> 0:25:41.119 make a wish and it's okay. He was sick for 0:25:41.160 --> 0:25:44.040 a long time. Steve, why did you say that? It's 0:25:44.040 --> 0:25:48.840 okay you guys, I'm here. It is all good. Life happens, guys. 0:25:48.840 --> 0:25:51.840 We're all gonna die, all right here, we got all right? Great? 0:25:51.840 --> 0:25:53.760 Thank you for bringing that up, Steve. I'm so glad 0:25:53.760 --> 0:25:56.119 they all know that we're all going to die. That 0:25:56.280 --> 0:26:00.200 is not what this podcast needed. It's okay. I'm literally okay, 0:26:00.200 --> 0:26:02.240 I'm going home next week. Okay, I mean I was 0:26:02.359 --> 0:26:05.040 home and then I'm going back. I literally left home 0:26:05.160 --> 0:26:08.320 to watch a couple of British baking shows come to you, 0:26:09.840 --> 0:26:11.879 and then I'm going to go watch Paradise with my 0:26:11.920 --> 0:26:14.679 mother and mittens the kittens. So I'm literally spreading the 0:26:14.720 --> 0:26:17.480 ashes next week. Okay. They don't want to know he is, 0:26:17.520 --> 0:26:21.360 but they don't want to know Stephen. They don't know. 0:26:22.440 --> 0:26:23.919 They don't want to know that, they don't want to 0:26:23.920 --> 0:26:32.120 know that any people just came into the guy. You guys, Okay, okay, okay, 0:26:32.200 --> 0:26:42.199 we got a time limit down. Okay, we gotta keep 0:26:41.960 --> 0:26:46.359 it back. We're back. Number two coming out next is 0:26:46.400 --> 0:26:48.800 a guy that we met last night. He was brave 0:26:48.920 --> 0:26:52.800