WEBVTT - Reckless Replay: He's Your Man?!?! 0:00:00.240 --> 0:00:03.160 Welcome to Can't Flee Reckless, the production of iHeart Radio 0:00:03.279 --> 0:00:16.880 and The Black Effect, And just like that, we're back 0:00:16.920 --> 0:00:20.000 with yet another podcast episode with your girl just hilarious. 0:00:20.239 --> 0:00:23.120 Welcome to Carefully Reckless, where I Fix your mess. 0:00:23.200 --> 0:00:24.280 Y'all listen. 0:00:24.320 --> 0:00:26.239 I just want to give a special shout out to 0:00:26.280 --> 0:00:28.680 the Breakfast Club and be Et and Charlemagne and the 0:00:28.720 --> 0:00:32.920 Black Effect in our heart, all four of those entities. 0:00:33.680 --> 0:00:36.800 They are the reason, well not the whole reason, but 0:00:37.440 --> 0:00:40.400 a good part of the reason why I do keep 0:00:40.440 --> 0:00:41.879 coming back to do this shit. 0:00:41.680 --> 0:00:42.480 Every Wednesday, y'all. 0:00:42.479 --> 0:00:44.239 I want to let y'all know I love y'all, and 0:00:44.280 --> 0:00:46.639 I just I really really feel good, really really feel good. 0:00:46.640 --> 0:00:48.400 It's my first day at Breakfast Club, my first day 0:00:48.440 --> 0:00:51.040 of the weekendt Breakfast Club. So my episode drops on 0:00:51.080 --> 0:00:53.959 a Wednesday, but this is a Monday, all right, and 0:00:54.360 --> 0:00:55.560 I just want to let y'all know the. 0:00:55.480 --> 0:00:57.360 Type of work day that I'm dealing with. 0:00:57.640 --> 0:01:02.640 I flew from Charlotte, North Carolina after a show last night. 0:01:02.920 --> 0:01:04.839 Right show was at six pm. 0:01:04.880 --> 0:01:07.280 We got off stage, finished the show, everything was wrapped 0:01:07.319 --> 0:01:08.520 up a round like eight thirty. 0:01:08.880 --> 0:01:11.360 Had to catch a nine fifty eight flight. 0:01:11.760 --> 0:01:15.520 I made the flight, got here, landed here in New 0:01:15.600 --> 0:01:19.160 York around like right before twelve o'clock. We bought it 0:01:19.200 --> 0:01:21.400 at nine fifty eight, so we took off around like 0:01:21.440 --> 0:01:24.760 ten something, landed twelve, didn't get to my hotel till 0:01:24.760 --> 0:01:27.640 one got right back up at four o'clock. That my 0:01:27.720 --> 0:01:30.720 makeup was here at the station at five point thirty 0:01:31.040 --> 0:01:32.760 to go on at six am. 0:01:33.120 --> 0:01:34.160 I'm tired as hell. 0:01:34.440 --> 0:01:37.560 And then from six to ten we do breakfast club, 0:01:37.720 --> 0:01:40.480 we do whatever interviews that we have, and then now 0:01:40.560 --> 0:01:43.440 I'm in here recording, So I am literally running off 0:01:43.440 --> 0:01:44.679 of three hours of sleep. 0:01:45.000 --> 0:01:46.720 But I love y'all so much. I love what I do. 0:01:47.040 --> 0:01:49.120 I'm tired, but I still got energy. You understand what 0:01:49.120 --> 0:01:49.480 I'm saying. 0:01:49.520 --> 0:01:54.920 So the motivation can also be adrenaline, Like, yeah, I'm tired, yeah, 0:01:55.040 --> 0:01:56.760 and I may not even sound like it, and shit, 0:01:56.880 --> 0:02:00.400 I really am. I'm not sleepy, I'm not drained. I'm 0:02:00.440 --> 0:02:03.160 just tired, that's all. So kay to say that you're tired, 0:02:03.200 --> 0:02:04.760 I'm not tired of y'all. I'm not tired of what 0:02:04.800 --> 0:02:07.000 I do. I'm actually very damn grateful and I'm gonna 0:02:07.080 --> 0:02:09.760 keep on going and doing what I do. But I'm 0:02:09.840 --> 0:02:12.040 letting y'all know I do this shit for y'all. You 0:02:12.120 --> 0:02:14.880 found me, So we're gonna jump right in. Nobody sent 0:02:14.919 --> 0:02:16.560 in voice notes for this episode. 0:02:16.560 --> 0:02:20.160 So I'm just gonna read this long ass run on sentence. 0:02:20.240 --> 0:02:22.079 That's what it is. I'm gonna call it out. It 0:02:22.120 --> 0:02:24.760 is what it is, girl, Hi, Jess, I really need 0:02:24.800 --> 0:02:27.440 you to help with my mess. I wish to remain 0:02:27.440 --> 0:02:30.080 anonymous because I could catch a case about this one. 0:02:30.200 --> 0:02:31.120 Damn oh shit. 0:02:31.800 --> 0:02:33.840 So I guess I'll start off with the fact that 0:02:33.880 --> 0:02:36.440 I'm a twenty two year old female who's had really 0:02:36.520 --> 0:02:39.000 bad taste in men, and I find myself to be 0:02:39.040 --> 0:02:41.040 a little bit of a hopeless romantic. I mean, we 0:02:41.120 --> 0:02:44.640 are you, twenty two shit, I'm always falling in love 0:02:44.680 --> 0:02:46.240 with the idea of a man. 0:02:46.440 --> 0:02:46.840 Anyway. 0:02:46.840 --> 0:02:49.600 In February, I started a job working in the kitchen 0:02:49.639 --> 0:02:52.280 at the jail. Before starting this job, my mother and 0:02:52.360 --> 0:02:55.800 family all said do not fall for anyone in there, 0:02:56.280 --> 0:02:59.160 meaning in the jail. I even had training informing me 0:02:59.720 --> 0:03:03.160 that personal relationship with an inmate could result in a 0:03:03.280 --> 0:03:04.240 rape charge for me. 0:03:04.680 --> 0:03:06.240 Wow, whether it was. 0:03:06.200 --> 0:03:09.200 Consensual or not, y'all listen to that, don't y'all become 0:03:09.320 --> 0:03:12.560 CEOs and cafeteria ladies and these damn jails, and then 0:03:12.639 --> 0:03:15.919 y'all get caught fucking these inmates. That's a charge on y'all, 0:03:15.960 --> 0:03:18.399 whether it was consensual or not. Y'all can go down 0:03:18.440 --> 0:03:21.520 for raping these motherfuckers. Okay, even if y'all didn't rape 0:03:21.560 --> 0:03:24.560 these motherfuckers. All right, back to the story. So I 0:03:24.600 --> 0:03:27.720 start working, things are going fine. I immediately knew I 0:03:27.800 --> 0:03:30.200 was going to have to deal with some thirsties. Okay, 0:03:30.240 --> 0:03:32.000 so you must be a nice, little cute little girl, 0:03:32.080 --> 0:03:34.920 you know what I'm saying. Nice wholesome young lady, But 0:03:34.960 --> 0:03:37.839 nothing can truly prepare you for working with men who 0:03:37.880 --> 0:03:41.000 haven't had pussy in years. I had men saying they 0:03:41.120 --> 0:03:43.760 drink my bath water, sniffing me when they walk past. 0:03:43.800 --> 0:03:45.920 It was a lot, I must admit. But there was 0:03:46.000 --> 0:03:49.120 one that was different. They called him Bori for anyone 0:03:49.160 --> 0:03:52.800 that isn't Latino, that's short for the Boriqua. Okay, okay, 0:03:52.840 --> 0:03:55.080 I said that right. I got my little Spanish down 0:03:55.120 --> 0:03:58.280 pick Boriqua. And at first I wasn't even looking at 0:03:58.360 --> 0:04:01.160 him that way at all. It just started with small 0:04:01.200 --> 0:04:04.840 conversation asking where I'm from. Talking about family, him helping 0:04:04.880 --> 0:04:07.480 me carry heavy things so I wouldn't have to struggle. 0:04:08.040 --> 0:04:10.200 The next thing, I know, every day we're talking more 0:04:10.200 --> 0:04:14.360 and more about life and God. Okay, I noticed the 0:04:14.400 --> 0:04:17.680 disrespect from the other men eventually stopped as well. He 0:04:17.720 --> 0:04:20.000 would tell me how beautiful I was and how he 0:04:20.080 --> 0:04:22.040 just wanted to take care of me and do everything 0:04:22.120 --> 0:04:25.280 for me. Eventually my wall broke down and I started 0:04:25.279 --> 0:04:27.920 to develop feelings for the man who I was spending 0:04:27.960 --> 0:04:32.599 so much time around. So we started getting frisky. Hold 0:04:32.600 --> 0:04:36.720 on and the damn jail girl, So we started getting risky, 0:04:36.760 --> 0:04:39.719 she said, not frisky. I slipped him my number, He 0:04:39.720 --> 0:04:42.680 would slip me letters and pictures. We would sneak off 0:04:42.720 --> 0:04:45.560 into the freezer together. No, we didn't have sex. We 0:04:45.600 --> 0:04:48.080 started talking about a life together. When he got out, 0:04:48.400 --> 0:04:50.960 I was even looking for apartners and shit. And before 0:04:51.000 --> 0:04:53.000 you judge me, I'm going through a lot in life 0:04:53.080 --> 0:04:55.400 right now. Sometimes the unhealed part of me looks for 0:04:55.480 --> 0:04:58.760 something that can save me, or someone to come save me. 0:04:59.360 --> 0:05:02.480 After a while, words spread that we were messing around. 0:05:02.560 --> 0:05:04.600 Oh shit, girl, you know it's like the hood. It's 0:05:04.600 --> 0:05:07.200 the damn jail, old shit, the walls talk and the 0:05:07.240 --> 0:05:10.720 inmates do too, and sure enough, this information gets back 0:05:10.760 --> 0:05:13.000 to my manager. I'm not gonna say her name, but 0:05:13.040 --> 0:05:15.120 I will say this. She is one of the realist 0:05:15.160 --> 0:05:17.760 shorties I ever met. She sits me down and tells 0:05:17.800 --> 0:05:20.240 me she knows about me and body, and I'm gonna 0:05:20.240 --> 0:05:23.680 just say buddy, me and Boddy that she really likes me. 0:05:24.160 --> 0:05:25.960 And that's why she was telling me. She thought it 0:05:26.000 --> 0:05:29.839 would be best if I quit. Damn that if the 0:05:29.839 --> 0:05:33.279 information got back to her, then word was spread beyond 0:05:33.320 --> 0:05:37.320 her into the CEOs and then they'd launch an investigation 0:05:37.480 --> 0:05:38.560 and I'd get arrested. 0:05:38.960 --> 0:05:39.960 So she was saving me. 0:05:40.520 --> 0:05:42.800 To avoid all of the mess, I just needed to quit, 0:05:43.160 --> 0:05:45.960 and that's exactly what I did. I came in one 0:05:46.040 --> 0:05:49.000 last day to tell Boddy to make sure he saves 0:05:49.000 --> 0:05:51.720 my number in a safe space, and I didn't go back. 0:05:52.200 --> 0:05:54.880 This was in the end of March, so having quit, 0:05:55.040 --> 0:05:57.200 I figured there was nothing more for me to lose. 0:05:57.279 --> 0:05:59.360 To look for him, So that's what I did. I 0:05:59.400 --> 0:06:02.239 looked for him on Facebook and found a couple of pages. 0:06:02.560 --> 0:06:05.039 I looked through his friendless to see if I can 0:06:05.240 --> 0:06:07.440 find someone to pass a message to him. 0:06:07.800 --> 0:06:09.279 Also, he didn't call you. Damn. 0:06:09.680 --> 0:06:12.040 I find this friend that he seemed to be very 0:06:12.040 --> 0:06:14.320 close with. I messaged the friend to see if they 0:06:14.400 --> 0:06:17.880 still keep in contact, and this man proceeds to tell 0:06:17.920 --> 0:06:20.280 me that him and buddy are together. 0:06:21.320 --> 0:06:25.560 What that was his man? Oh? 0:06:26.080 --> 0:06:28.240 He asked me who I was and what I wanted 0:06:28.279 --> 0:06:31.120 with his boyfriend. Then I looked through his pictures and 0:06:31.160 --> 0:06:33.160 find a picture with them too hugged up. 0:06:33.120 --> 0:06:35.160 With engagement rings. Damn. 0:06:36.040 --> 0:06:39.520 Needless to say, my heart was broke. I immediately got 0:06:39.600 --> 0:06:41.800 sick to my stomach. I didn't know how to process 0:06:41.800 --> 0:06:44.640 that information at all. So I just blocked the friend 0:06:44.720 --> 0:06:47.960 and the situation from my mind and just kept moving forward, 0:06:48.360 --> 0:06:50.640 because now I got to figure out how to pay 0:06:50.640 --> 0:06:53.200 my bills since I was stupid and fucked up a 0:06:53.240 --> 0:06:56.800 state job with a pension and all that girl dumba's hell. 0:06:57.200 --> 0:06:59.800 Despite that, though, I still think of him all the 0:06:59.839 --> 0:07:02.360 time time and the way he made me feel, how 0:07:02.400 --> 0:07:04.880 soft and gentle he was with me. Maybe that was 0:07:05.040 --> 0:07:08.599 from him being gay, I don't fucking know, or just 0:07:08.680 --> 0:07:11.000 him knowing how to treat another human being. 0:07:11.080 --> 0:07:13.679 Girl. That don't have nothing to do with him being gay, 0:07:13.920 --> 0:07:14.120 you know? 0:07:14.920 --> 0:07:18.080 But now he still calls me, uh, and I answer 0:07:18.160 --> 0:07:20.600 from time to time because I want to hear his voice. 0:07:21.280 --> 0:07:24.320 Oh today I told him I knew about him and 0:07:24.400 --> 0:07:27.280 his boyfriend. Of course he couldn't explain much do to 0:07:27.320 --> 0:07:30.480 where he is. But he claims that's his old life 0:07:30.760 --> 0:07:33.040 and he wants a new one, and how he doesn't 0:07:33.040 --> 0:07:36.240 want to lose me, how he'll answer whatever questions I have. 0:07:36.440 --> 0:07:38.840 Just give him a chance when he gets out. Oh hell, no, 0:07:39.120 --> 0:07:40.720 you want me to wait for you to get out. 0:07:40.760 --> 0:07:42.880 I don't know when the hell that is You want 0:07:42.960 --> 0:07:45.400 me to wait for you to get out to tell 0:07:45.400 --> 0:07:47.600 me that you ain't gay? No more, so you can 0:07:47.680 --> 0:07:51.160 answer all my questions about you being gay, some about 0:07:51.160 --> 0:07:53.240 this is your old life. Well, that Nigga didn't say 0:07:53.240 --> 0:07:55.400 that when I hit him up to ask him about you. 0:07:55.760 --> 0:07:57.880 Y'all are fucking engaged. And what you did was you 0:07:57.920 --> 0:08:00.360 got your ass locked up, and that Nigga's waiting for 0:08:00.400 --> 0:08:01.360 you to come to fuck home. 0:08:01.960 --> 0:08:02.320 All right. 0:08:03.200 --> 0:08:05.520 A part of me wants that so bad, just to 0:08:05.520 --> 0:08:07.680 say fuck it and love him openly for who he is. 0:08:08.120 --> 0:08:10.160 Then there's that other part of me that thinks, what 0:08:10.200 --> 0:08:12.360 if he gets tired and wants to go back to 0:08:12.440 --> 0:08:16.200 dick exactly I'm not sure why I haven't completely checked 0:08:16.200 --> 0:08:18.960 out after finding out he was gay. I need to 0:08:19.040 --> 0:08:22.000 know how you would fix this mess. Am my delusional 0:08:22.000 --> 0:08:24.600 to want love so bad that I tried to love 0:08:24.640 --> 0:08:25.200 a gay man. 0:08:25.680 --> 0:08:27.720 Get back to me if you can. This shit got 0:08:27.720 --> 0:08:28.440 me fucked up. 0:08:28.920 --> 0:08:30.800 Hold up, Hold up, I know this shit getting good. 0:08:30.840 --> 0:08:33.120 But listen to just a couple seconds of a commercial. 0:08:33.160 --> 0:08:35.520 If you love me, you'll listen, all. 0:08:35.480 --> 0:08:37.120 Right, bookie. But I do understand. 0:08:37.120 --> 0:08:38.880 I understand how you can be fucked up by a lot, 0:08:38.920 --> 0:08:41.400 because that was just a whole lot. All right, Now, 0:08:41.679 --> 0:08:43.920 let's go back to the beginning. Listen, You're twenty two 0:08:44.000 --> 0:08:46.560 years old. You're twenty two. You had a great job, 0:08:46.800 --> 0:08:49.520 you did, I mean, I don't you know considerably speaking. 0:08:49.559 --> 0:08:51.400 You know, you worked in a fucking jail, but you 0:08:51.400 --> 0:08:53.640 did have a pension. You mentioned, you mentioned that you 0:08:53.720 --> 0:08:55.439 loved the state job. I mean, obviously you didn't have 0:08:55.480 --> 0:08:58.040 anything bad to say about it other than you had 0:08:58.040 --> 0:09:00.720 to leave it due to a nigga. I'm just gonna 0:09:00.720 --> 0:09:02.680 say a nigga. Ain't gonna say a gay nigga because 0:09:02.720 --> 0:09:04.079 we don't even know if he's gay. He may be, 0:09:04.240 --> 0:09:08.679 by he obviously is not gay. You know, he's obviously bisexual, 0:09:09.200 --> 0:09:11.200 or he could be poly. I mean, we don't know 0:09:11.280 --> 0:09:14.160 when we get into all the sexual departments, but we don't. 0:09:14.280 --> 0:09:16.720 We don't know, all right. I'm also not gonna say 0:09:17.080 --> 0:09:20.400 what he made you feel has no regard. It's fake, 0:09:20.520 --> 0:09:23.560 it's bullshit, it's asinine to feel that way. I'm not 0:09:23.679 --> 0:09:26.680 going to say that because that's not true. I do 0:09:26.800 --> 0:09:29.600 believe that he developed feelings for you. I believe that 0:09:29.800 --> 0:09:33.280 he was and probably still is connected to that ex man, 0:09:33.480 --> 0:09:36.320 you know, his ex fiance or could still be his 0:09:36.360 --> 0:09:39.400 current fiance, and he still may be even battling with 0:09:39.440 --> 0:09:40.199 his sexuality. 0:09:40.280 --> 0:09:42.080 He may not know who the fuck he is. You 0:09:42.160 --> 0:09:43.959 understand what I'm saying. He may not. That's why I 0:09:44.000 --> 0:09:45.000 don't want to call him gay. 0:09:45.480 --> 0:09:48.440 We can't just say, oh, you're gay because you found 0:09:48.480 --> 0:09:50.360 out that he fucked with men. You know that he 0:09:50.440 --> 0:09:52.800 had a man that he was engaged to. He could 0:09:52.840 --> 0:09:55.800 still be very well bisexual. You know, we just don't know, 0:09:56.120 --> 0:09:58.120 so I don't want to put that on him altogether. 0:09:58.440 --> 0:10:01.760 I also don't think you're crazy for feeling the way 0:10:01.800 --> 0:10:03.880 you do. We can't control our feelings. We can't control 0:10:03.960 --> 0:10:06.320 who we love. If you love this man, I do 0:10:06.480 --> 0:10:10.640 understand that. I do think that you are young. I'm 0:10:10.640 --> 0:10:12.240 not going to say you don't know what love is, 0:10:12.600 --> 0:10:15.520 but you have a whole lot more life to live 0:10:16.360 --> 0:10:19.360 and a lot more to experience before you lock. 0:10:19.280 --> 0:10:21.959 Down with a guy who is in jail. 0:10:22.000 --> 0:10:23.840 You don't know when he's coming home, and he just 0:10:23.960 --> 0:10:26.000 expressed to you that he may be gay. 0:10:26.400 --> 0:10:27.120 You know what I'm saying. 0:10:27.280 --> 0:10:30.280 But he wants you to wait until he gets out 0:10:30.480 --> 0:10:35.120 for a full explanation. That's bullshit. That's the only part 0:10:35.160 --> 0:10:38.480 about it that is bullshit. And the craziest part about 0:10:38.520 --> 0:10:41.760 it is that you actually had to quit your job. 0:10:41.800 --> 0:10:43.520 You didn't quit because you wanted to. You quit because 0:10:43.520 --> 0:10:46.840 you had to, and you avoid it and arrest. Okay, 0:10:46.920 --> 0:10:49.120 I think your manager is a real one for coming, 0:10:49.559 --> 0:10:52.960 you know, coming to you before shit actually hit the 0:10:53.000 --> 0:10:56.160 fucking fan and telling you to get out of there. 0:10:56.200 --> 0:10:57.040 That was meaningful. 0:10:57.080 --> 0:11:00.240 That was somebody who understands and probably somebody who saw 0:11:00.280 --> 0:11:03.120 a situation like that before. You know, a young girl 0:11:03.160 --> 0:11:05.480 caught in a situation like that. I'm not gonna say 0:11:05.480 --> 0:11:07.360 that all men in jail are the same. I'm not 0:11:07.360 --> 0:11:09.600 going to say that, but I am gonna say, it's 0:11:09.720 --> 0:11:12.719 very easy to believe a dream that a man in 0:11:12.800 --> 0:11:15.440 jail will sell you. You understand what I'm saying, not saying 0:11:15.480 --> 0:11:17.920 that this is your situation now, I'm talking in general. 0:11:18.080 --> 0:11:20.960 It's very easy to believe that because all they have 0:11:21.000 --> 0:11:22.120 to live by is dreams. 0:11:22.600 --> 0:11:24.400 Some of them don't even know when they're coming home. 0:11:24.600 --> 0:11:27.319 Some of them ain't even coming home, so all they 0:11:27.360 --> 0:11:29.360 have to do is hold on to dreams and memories 0:11:29.400 --> 0:11:32.560 and shit, you know, And sometimes their dreams become nightmares 0:11:32.559 --> 0:11:34.559 and shit because they don't know when they're coming home. 0:11:34.720 --> 0:11:37.640 They have to live in a fucking cage and look 0:11:37.679 --> 0:11:39.600 at four walls for the rest of their fucking lives 0:11:39.760 --> 0:11:42.000 or for a very long period of time, and be 0:11:42.080 --> 0:11:44.720 away from their friends and families. And like you said, pussy, 0:11:45.160 --> 0:11:47.640 you know what I'm saying. It's hard that you had 0:11:47.640 --> 0:11:50.720 to deal with the mental abuse, you know, the verbal 0:11:50.760 --> 0:11:53.360 abuse from all the other inmates hitting on you, telling 0:11:53.360 --> 0:11:54.719 you they drink your bad for it. I know it 0:11:54.760 --> 0:11:56.680 had to make you feel uncomfortable. And then you said 0:11:56.720 --> 0:11:59.600 you meant buddy, buddy kua and you all was sneaking 0:11:59.600 --> 0:12:01.839 to the free so much yry hand sex what the 0:12:01.840 --> 0:12:03.839 fuck y'all doing in the freezer. Then not y'all freezing, 0:12:03.920 --> 0:12:06.880 y'all damn asses off and they're just talking and trembling. 0:12:07.280 --> 0:12:08.400 What the fuck y'all doing? 0:12:08.840 --> 0:12:10.480 Shit, ain't no way you could ass sexy they I 0:12:10.559 --> 0:12:12.679 know this dick can't get hard in the cold a 0:12:12.800 --> 0:12:17.400 fucking freezer next to the chicken. Chiall listen, all jokes aside. 0:12:17.520 --> 0:12:21.480 I think, like I said, you're very young. Okay, make 0:12:21.520 --> 0:12:24.320 this a lesson. Learn you said he calls you, you 0:12:24.440 --> 0:12:26.840 still answer because you just want to hear his voice. 0:12:27.360 --> 0:12:29.640 Don't run from it. I'm not saying run from it. 0:12:29.800 --> 0:12:32.719 Just keep all your options open, honey. I can't tell you. 0:12:33.920 --> 0:12:36.800 I can't tell you. I can't tell you to be 0:12:36.920 --> 0:12:38.760 with a gay man. I can't tell you to not 0:12:38.920 --> 0:12:41.400 be with a bisexual man. I can't tell you to 0:12:41.480 --> 0:12:44.080 not fuck with him. And listen, it's all about your preference. 0:12:44.120 --> 0:12:46.319 You're still young, you don't know who the fuck you are. Probably, 0:12:46.360 --> 0:12:49.480 so even if you're considering dealing with the bisexual man, 0:12:50.040 --> 0:12:52.760 that's not me judging you. That's your fucking preference. If 0:12:52.880 --> 0:12:55.080 that's what you prefer, you need to figure out what 0:12:55.120 --> 0:12:57.080 you want to do. You know he said, that's his 0:12:57.120 --> 0:13:00.160 old life. Do you believe him? Can you ungay have 0:13:00.160 --> 0:13:02.960 to being gay for so long? That's a real fucking question. 0:13:03.360 --> 0:13:05.360 Women do it? Why can't men do it? 0:13:05.720 --> 0:13:08.839 And then the flip side is once your buttole been entered, 0:13:09.160 --> 0:13:12.520 how do you like go back to being a version. 0:13:12.240 --> 0:13:14.640 Of the butt? You know what I mean? And are 0:13:14.679 --> 0:13:17.839 you gay fever once you get your butt plugged up? 0:13:17.960 --> 0:13:18.480 You know what I'm saying. 0:13:18.640 --> 0:13:21.240 It's just so many there's so many questions, you know 0:13:21.280 --> 0:13:23.400 what I'm saying. We did have Andrew Calwell bring him 0:13:23.480 --> 0:13:25.400 up every now and then. He said that he's not 0:13:25.440 --> 0:13:28.920 gay anymore. He very well may not be, you know 0:13:28.960 --> 0:13:30.439 what I'm saying. We don't know what that guy does. 0:13:30.480 --> 0:13:32.520 I mean, he still has you know, is this feminine 0:13:32.559 --> 0:13:35.360 ways or whatever. But that could still just be the 0:13:35.440 --> 0:13:36.720 last little bit, you. 0:13:36.640 --> 0:13:38.040 Know, coming out. 0:13:38.160 --> 0:13:40.400 You know, he probably got to get the last little 0:13:40.400 --> 0:13:43.280 bit out by twenty twenty five. He could sound like me, 0:13:43.720 --> 0:13:47.560 you know, he could sound like you know, James Earl Jones. 0:13:47.600 --> 0:13:50.240 We don't know, you know what I mean, You probably don't. 0:13:50.640 --> 0:13:51.320 He probably don't. 0:13:51.440 --> 0:13:54.120 You know, he's getting the last little bit of gay out, 0:13:54.280 --> 0:13:57.160 you know. So we just don't know. And while it 0:13:57.200 --> 0:13:59.360 sounds like I'm playing, I'm being dead ass serious. 0:13:59.360 --> 0:14:00.400 All right, So I. 0:14:00.400 --> 0:14:03.920 Want you to, you know, reach out to body or 0:14:04.000 --> 0:14:05.720 well you can't reach out at the jail, you know, 0:14:05.880 --> 0:14:08.600 but don't reach out to no more his friends, because 0:14:08.600 --> 0:14:10.720 then I feel like you're gonna find out some more shit. 0:14:11.120 --> 0:14:12.640 All right. I think you need to let him know. 0:14:12.640 --> 0:14:14.720 Write him a nice little letter, let him know that 0:14:14.800 --> 0:14:17.160 you're conflicted on this, you know, be as open as 0:14:17.200 --> 0:14:18.959 you can, and tell him that you don't want to 0:14:19.000 --> 0:14:21.160 wait until he gets home for him to explain everything. 0:14:21.520 --> 0:14:24.040 You met him in there, and he still he owed 0:14:24.080 --> 0:14:27.160 you an explanation. Nigga, I lost my mother fucking job 0:14:27.920 --> 0:14:31.720 because I picked you, over risking my freedom I did. 0:14:31.720 --> 0:14:35.800 In hindsight, I ultimately picked you. He knows you're young. 0:14:36.160 --> 0:14:38.440 I'm sure you didn't lie about your fucking age. He 0:14:38.520 --> 0:14:41.480 knows you're young. I'm not saying that he's trying to 0:14:41.480 --> 0:14:43.960 take advantage of you, but you are very impressionable. 0:14:44.400 --> 0:14:46.360 Okay. It took him a minute to knock down that wall, 0:14:46.400 --> 0:14:49.480 but he did. A nigga in jail knocked down the wall. 0:14:50.200 --> 0:14:53.880 Okay, you can have anybody on the outside your age, 0:14:53.880 --> 0:14:56.200 a couple of years old or whatever, without a record, 0:14:56.320 --> 0:15:01.360 without a boyfriend or you know, a fiance and without 0:15:01.360 --> 0:15:06.360 a past like that, and you chose Buddy again. 0:15:06.840 --> 0:15:08.920 It may sound like I'm judging you. I'm not. 0:15:09.480 --> 0:15:12.520 But sometimes you gotta hear shit repeated back to you 0:15:12.640 --> 0:15:16.200 so you can hear how unorthodox it sounds. I'm not 0:15:16.240 --> 0:15:19.280 saying the situation is crazy. I'm not saying it's disgusting. 0:15:19.480 --> 0:15:20.760 I'm not saying any of that. I don't want you 0:15:20.840 --> 0:15:23.920 to get the wrong idea. I said unorthodox. It's a 0:15:23.960 --> 0:15:27.240 lot going on, a lot going on. You're too young 0:15:27.240 --> 0:15:29.240 for that. You should be working on your next fucking job, 0:15:29.720 --> 0:15:32.320 not working on buddy. And when the fuck he come home? 0:15:32.920 --> 0:15:34.920 What the fuck is he gonna give you? Is he 0:15:35.040 --> 0:15:38.200 backing up his promises with concrete details? Does he have 0:15:38.280 --> 0:15:41.080 a fucking plan? What is he doing in there now? 0:15:41.080 --> 0:15:42.240 And did you work in a jail or did you 0:15:42.240 --> 0:15:45.280 work in a prison that's different? Is he taking classes 0:15:45.280 --> 0:15:47.160 to better himself? Like? What the fuck is he doing? 0:15:47.520 --> 0:15:49.920 What are his dreams? Did y'all get to know each 0:15:49.920 --> 0:15:51.240 other in the damn did he tell you that in 0:15:51.240 --> 0:15:53.760 that freezer? What did he tell you he was cold, 0:15:53.760 --> 0:15:55.360 freezing your ass off. He supposed to be on the 0:15:55.440 --> 0:15:56.320 damn floor. 0:15:56.120 --> 0:15:58.680 With the rest of the inmates and you playing in 0:15:58.680 --> 0:16:00.920 the freezer with buddy. Girl. 0:16:01.760 --> 0:16:03.120 I think you need to go try to get your 0:16:03.200 --> 0:16:05.360 damn job back, or go to another damn jail and 0:16:05.400 --> 0:16:07.360 don't fall in love with no more fucking inmates. 0:16:07.440 --> 0:16:08.760 Girl. I mean that. 0:16:08.880 --> 0:16:10.560 No, they're not all the same, but that ain't where 0:16:10.640 --> 0:16:12.440 you want to get your man from. 0:16:12.920 --> 0:16:14.040 It's good men and that two. 0:16:14.400 --> 0:16:17.360 But let them come home, figure themselves out and find 0:16:17.360 --> 0:16:21.000 their woman, or let them come home to people that's already. 0:16:20.640 --> 0:16:22.320 Waiting for them. I mean that. 0:16:22.760 --> 0:16:25.200 I mean that, even in your case, let them come 0:16:25.240 --> 0:16:30.560 home to who's waiting for them obviously, Okay, because dreams 0:16:30.560 --> 0:16:35.640 are still sold in jail. Okay, Okay, check back in 0:16:35.720 --> 0:16:37.480 with me because I want to know where you go 0:16:37.560 --> 0:16:39.600 from here. I would love for you to go get 0:16:39.640 --> 0:16:41.840 another job. You seem like you had your head on 0:16:42.040 --> 0:16:46.400 damn straight, but you know, we don't know, we don't know. 0:16:46.440 --> 0:16:47.640 I know you need to get it together. 0:16:48.440 --> 0:16:50.760 If you love me, you'll listen to this commercial and 0:16:50.800 --> 0:16:54.600 then we'll be right back moving on. Hey, jas, I 0:16:54.600 --> 0:16:56.600 have a boyfriend that I've been with for four years, 0:16:56.680 --> 0:16:59.560 but we both want different things. I want us to 0:16:59.640 --> 0:17:02.080 have our own place, but he wants to keep living 0:17:02.120 --> 0:17:06.840 with his dad. He's twenty one and I'm twenty. Damn girl, shit, 0:17:07.800 --> 0:17:10.560 girly pribably ain't ready for all of that. Now, come on, 0:17:10.720 --> 0:17:12.919 what the hell are you talking about? First of all, 0:17:12.960 --> 0:17:16.240 your little hot ass, calm down. You ain't even twenty 0:17:16.280 --> 0:17:20.639 one yet. He's twenty one and you're twenty. Understand you 0:17:20.680 --> 0:17:23.080 want to move. Okay, you want to move with your boyfriend. 0:17:23.160 --> 0:17:26.000 Y'all been together for four years. Yeah, so, y'all were 0:17:26.000 --> 0:17:31.240 together since sixteen seventeen. I understand, But you really truly 0:17:31.280 --> 0:17:34.320 don't know a person until you live with them. And now, honestly, 0:17:34.359 --> 0:17:37.600 I'm not trying to I'm not trying to control your life. 0:17:38.280 --> 0:17:40.120 But you got one more year until you make all 0:17:40.119 --> 0:17:42.120 these big decisions, and you got to live with them. 0:17:42.240 --> 0:17:45.080 You understand what I'm saying. I think he's making a 0:17:45.080 --> 0:17:49.280 sensible decision. You act like he thirty one, forty one 0:17:49.440 --> 0:17:52.520 living with his dad. I know some people living with 0:17:52.600 --> 0:17:55.880 their parents that are older than I am, which I'm 0:17:55.920 --> 0:17:59.000 still not saying anything is wrong with I'm just saying 0:17:59.440 --> 0:18:02.840 it depends on your level of independence. If you want 0:18:02.840 --> 0:18:05.280