WEBVTT - Episode 58: Heaven or Hell?

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<v Speaker 1>This is Dan Patrick takes a gap gambling. There's something

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<v Speaker 1>that I did a clever way to circumvent Dan actually

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<v Speaker 1>making bets himself by using a proxy, and I became

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<v Speaker 1>consumed by it and now joined by bad Larry and

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<v Speaker 1>Dylan the graphics guy. Here's Dan Patrick having a rotator

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<v Speaker 1>cuff surgery. Larry. I know, I know, I know. That's

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<v Speaker 1>one thing. That's one thing you could beat me and

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<v Speaker 1>Dan you could throw a football a little further than

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<v Speaker 1>I could. I'm damn, I'm giving you that one, I know,

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<v Speaker 1>but it just feels like you're not giving it to me,

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<v Speaker 1>like you're you're actually saying something in a negative way

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<v Speaker 1>to make yourself look better. No, no, no, no, I

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<v Speaker 1>would saying I've thrown some golf balls in the last

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<v Speaker 1>couple of years, and the next day my arms hanging.

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<v Speaker 1>I just wanted to know how your arms felt. I

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<v Speaker 1>was concerned, Dan, why are you throwing golf balls? Um?

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<v Speaker 1>Someone says you can't throw it a hundred yards and

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<v Speaker 1>I just laughed at him. I guess, okay, yeah, Larry,

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<v Speaker 1>maybe if you hit it with an aluminum baseball. Bad No, no, okay,

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<v Speaker 1>let me let me vouche Larry. Let me let me

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<v Speaker 1>bounce for Larry. Larry, it was a good baseball player. Okay,

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<v Speaker 1>Just I'm letting you guys know, if you're placing a

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<v Speaker 1>bet on bad Larry throwing a golf ball a hundred

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<v Speaker 1>and twenty yards, my money would be on bad Larry.

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<v Speaker 1>I appreciate that. Whatever are you talking. I don't want

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<v Speaker 1>you talk to like sixteen people have been on the

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<v Speaker 1>wrong side of that that and I'm probably back then

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<v Speaker 1>I would have had a late three to one. It's

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<v Speaker 1>not that hard to do. Let's add to the list

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<v Speaker 1>of complication. Do you guys want to put this on

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<v Speaker 1>the bet series? Okay? I think I can. What's the

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<v Speaker 1>line under? Okay, I mean I have to go under two?

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<v Speaker 1>And what's the number I gotta throw? Now? Said it?

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<v Speaker 1>I'm sixty five years old, But I didn't, Larry. You

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<v Speaker 1>just said you threw it a hundred and twenty yards

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<v Speaker 1>pin of high on the eight pole at some golf course.

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<v Speaker 1>You just yeah, yeah, and not just once, Dan, But

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<v Speaker 1>when when did you do it years ago? Well, you

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<v Speaker 1>didn't say that I threw the football yesterday on this show.

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<v Speaker 1>Is it so damn difficult? Now? Can you throw? Okay? Larry?

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<v Speaker 1>Can you throw a golf ball a hundred yards right now?

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<v Speaker 1>I doubt it? Well, then shot hurt? Why are we?

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<v Speaker 1>Why are we talking about this? I threw the football yesterday,

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<v Speaker 1>throwing a football yesterday, but I didn't bring it. I

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<v Speaker 1>could throw it over well, okay, all right, nobody cares

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<v Speaker 1>about I threw the football yesterday. I didn't warm up

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<v Speaker 1>and probably threw it. I can throw it fifty yards now,

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<v Speaker 1>Oh do you want to have him? Already? Did this

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<v Speaker 1>outside the man cave? Because John Calipari. John Calipari said

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<v Speaker 1>you can't throw it fifty yards? I said, John, I can. Okay,

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<v Speaker 1>not pretty, but I did. Got there? Yeah, God, dealing

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<v Speaker 1>was there that? You know? Tyler had to get like

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<v Speaker 1>the longest tape measure ever out running across the I

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<v Speaker 1>know this was that. No, No, it wasn't. It found

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<v Speaker 1>it underhanded. It was a compliment for you. You were

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<v Speaker 1>going to bring up what I did so you could

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<v Speaker 1>talk about what you did forty years ago. Okay, in

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<v Speaker 1>the Steinmel's house to go to the track. Nobody cares,

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<v Speaker 1>nobody knows who. Okay, Okay, here we go. Let's let's

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<v Speaker 1>recapp I apologize to those listening. Has nothing to do

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<v Speaker 1>with anything. It was very entertaining for me. Dylan is

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<v Speaker 1>up to units in the playoffs, Bad Larry is minus

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<v Speaker 1>eight and Shay is up one unit. Last chance to

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<v Speaker 1>know now you you have your last chance and a

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<v Speaker 1>lot of prop bets here. Uh. Dylan, by the way,

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<v Speaker 1>got a tattoo here in Scottsdale. I don't know if

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<v Speaker 1>there was a line on that getting another tattoo, but

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<v Speaker 1>the over it was I think it was, uh what

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<v Speaker 1>one or a half half a tattoo and I took

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<v Speaker 1>the over. Smart. Also, sweet little Mario got his first

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<v Speaker 1>Mario got his tattoo. Okay. Recapping you had ufc ars

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<v Speaker 1>Larry as U CF you did you win that bet?

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<v Speaker 1>I actually lost that dwn okay? And then you have

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<v Speaker 1>the Cornhill Finals? Did you win Cornhill Finals? No? So actually,

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<v Speaker 1>in true fashion on the show, it's it's tomorrow, so

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<v Speaker 1>I put the bet in last week thanks last weekend.

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<v Speaker 1>So honestly a nice little surprise, okay, and I'm sure

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<v Speaker 1>we'll be watching tomorrow. Bad Larry didn't have a good

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<v Speaker 1>uh golf weekend at Pebble Beach. Uh, Shady doesn't look

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<v Speaker 1>like did you have a good week at all with

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<v Speaker 1>college bounsketball. No, I got smoked, Danny. Alright. Um, actually

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<v Speaker 1>also Maverick. Maverick McNeely had to withdraw from the uh

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<v Speaker 1>pro M, so he almost missed the cut. All right,

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<v Speaker 1>can we start with the Bens this weekend? All right,

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<v Speaker 1>here we go, Dylan. I'm gonna let you go first. Okay, Um,

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<v Speaker 1>all right, I'm going five units Dan Chiefs money line.

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<v Speaker 1>Just straight up, everyone and their mother likes the Eagles

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<v Speaker 1>in the Super Bowl. Okay, research but not everybody, but okay,

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<v Speaker 1>many people, Okay, a lot of people. Um, I'm going

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<v Speaker 1>under fifty one. I just feel like under in the

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<v Speaker 1>Super Bowl is a smart play. I feel like it's

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<v Speaker 1>always a stinker. The under is gone eleven and eight

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<v Speaker 1>in the last nineteen Super It's actually closer than I

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<v Speaker 1>would have thought. But all right, Um, I have the

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<v Speaker 1>four units in the coin to has to be Tales

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<v Speaker 1>per fading Shay last week Tales ever fails, and then

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<v Speaker 1>two units. Patrick Mahomes Super Bowl m v P plus

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<v Speaker 1>one quarterbacks who have won MVPs thirty one out of

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<v Speaker 1>fifty six Super Bowls. Yeah, I mean it's really just

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<v Speaker 1>gonna pretty much be either him or Jalen hurds. Okay, um,

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<v Speaker 1>and I'm putting one unit on. I'm gonna butcher this.

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<v Speaker 1>Emir smith Mark said anytime touchdown score plus three thousand.

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<v Speaker 1>I know. He was literally just the last guy on

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<v Speaker 1>the list of touchdown scores with the longest odds. He's

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<v Speaker 1>a return specialist, slash receiver. They picked up off like

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<v Speaker 1>waivers like name. I figured, why not, it's a Super Bowl.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah yeah, thank you. Un what else do you have?

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<v Speaker 1>I know you're just bullshitting, but um, Gatorade purple plus nine.

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<v Speaker 1>We've got my purple crocs on right now. It's got

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<v Speaker 1>to be purple. Um. Any kick to hit the upright

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<v Speaker 1>or a crossbar plus four fifty. This would have been better.

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<v Speaker 1>Actually if the Cowboys were playing in maher was kicking.

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<v Speaker 1>But you can see I could see a joint happening

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<v Speaker 1>at some point in the game. That's a shot at

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<v Speaker 1>Shay right there with the cowboy. Yep, you talked about

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<v Speaker 1>an octopus in the Super Bowl, of course. Um. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>so that's the player scores a TD and then scores

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<v Speaker 1>the two point conversion subsequently. Okay, and I actually I

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<v Speaker 1>think Pauli actually said it's called an octopus because it's eight. No,

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<v Speaker 1>I did was that you? Yeah? Okay? Then someone told me, yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>I did, I told you, and then it was obviously

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<v Speaker 1>I was like, yeah, that makes perfect sense. Um. And

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<v Speaker 1>then obviously to dan nerd um waste management open this weekend. Okay, yeah, um.

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<v Speaker 1>So I'm taking there to be a hole and one

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<v Speaker 1>on six team during the at any point during the

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<v Speaker 1>tournament plus two hundred. Okay, and that's a wrap for me. Okay,

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<v Speaker 1>hopefully makes some magic. Alright, Let's go to Shay Shay

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<v Speaker 1>and Irving. He has a great podcast on his own

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<v Speaker 1>called Shay and Irving wherever you get your podcast. All right, Shay,

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<v Speaker 1>your bets are going to be what yeah, buckle and

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<v Speaker 1>y'all bumble loss from the second half? Yes, plus one?

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<v Speaker 1>Ten safety happens in the game, Yes plus ten forty

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<v Speaker 1>Either team, wait, wait, will slow down so people can

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<v Speaker 1>absorb this, Danny. They're gonna absorb it all day. Listen,

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<v Speaker 1>either team kicks a walk off winning field goal plus

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<v Speaker 1>a thousand. Okay, by the way, a safety hasn't occurred

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<v Speaker 1>in eight Super Bowls. Okay, it happened when Kirk Warner

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<v Speaker 1>played the Steelers. And I'll never not bet it, do

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<v Speaker 1>you understand? Okay, so safety to be recorded, either team

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<v Speaker 1>to kick a game winning field goal, Yeah yeah, that's one.

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<v Speaker 1>And then first yeah, these are all one units until

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<v Speaker 1>we get weird. The first team to enter the opponent's

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<v Speaker 1>red zone Eagles minus one. First touchdown rushing plus one

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<v Speaker 1>sixty longest third down conversion over twelve and a half yards,

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<v Speaker 1>that's minus one tenth. And then what happens first a

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<v Speaker 1>touchdown or a sack? The answer is sack minus one

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<v Speaker 1>oh five. Kansas City's first play is a pass plus

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<v Speaker 1>one ten a sign Reddick over point to five stacks.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm stealing money here, Danny minus two units. Jalen Hurts

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<v Speaker 1>m v P plus one thirty on the Phillies first

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<v Speaker 1>drive of the game. Player to catch a pass Miles

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<v Speaker 1>Stander plus Dick's fifty heads on the coin toss four units.

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<v Speaker 1>Opening kitch kick touchback minus one sixty, and I got

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<v Speaker 1>the over in the national anthem, Chris Stapleton come home, buddy. Wow. Wow,

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<v Speaker 1>that's a lot. Okay, I'm gonna add more to Oh okay,

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<v Speaker 1>what else do you got? Well, not yet, I mean

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<v Speaker 1>I gotta go drink some of them. We're gonna get weird.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm gonna add something. I'm gonna take Hassan Reddick under

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<v Speaker 1>the corner of a sack? You would you would? Half? Okay? Yeah? Wait,

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<v Speaker 1>what is it? A half a sack? Half a sack?

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<v Speaker 1>Then it hits the over? Okay, so I'm going under it. Okay,

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<v Speaker 1>you have bad Larry. Yeah, I just pulled over the

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<v Speaker 1>side of the road. Here Dan, five units the Eagles?

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<v Speaker 1>What is that line? Minus one or minus one and

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<v Speaker 1>a half? One and a half? I thought we weren't allowed.

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<v Speaker 1>I thought we weren't allowed to go over four? What's

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<v Speaker 1>happened to? Now? What's that? It's always been five? I

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<v Speaker 1>don't always been one head, five on head on head. Okay,

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<v Speaker 1>you can do five, five units on heads, all right?

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<v Speaker 1>So five years on the Eagles, five units on over

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<v Speaker 1>the national anthem, And I want to know what numbers

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<v Speaker 1>you're giving me country singers. It's gonna be like it's

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<v Speaker 1>gonna be over by a mile by the way, Okay,

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<v Speaker 1>the over? Okay, I got one nineteen and a half. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>I might. I might have to just take the under

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<v Speaker 1>if you two idiots have the over. Because Billy Joel

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<v Speaker 1>had the shortest. That was one everything out, Dan were

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<v Speaker 1>angles sing the national anthem? It's gonna be over. It's

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<v Speaker 1>over by a mile. So you've got the over in

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<v Speaker 1>the national anthem. Why are you fighting me? My job

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<v Speaker 1>is just to be a moderator. Okay, I'll just tell

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<v Speaker 1>trying to help you there, that song's gonna be over

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<v Speaker 1>by I want to almost say fifteen seconds, but I'm

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<v Speaker 1>not gonna say that. Okay, alright, So five units on

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<v Speaker 1>the Western singer, that's what gives me the idea. Five

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<v Speaker 1>units on the egos. What else do you have? Lair,

0:12:16.280 --> 0:12:20.079
<v Speaker 1>five units over the national anthem, four units on the under,

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<v Speaker 1>fifty or fifty one whatever, four units on that and

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<v Speaker 1>I always bet heads, but I only gonna go three

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<v Speaker 1>units on heads. Okay, now I got Now, I got

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<v Speaker 1>two units on the under in the first quarter. I

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<v Speaker 1>need to know what line you're nin on that nine

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<v Speaker 1>and a half playing that to me, under for the

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<v Speaker 1>game is fifty one and a half and the under

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<v Speaker 1>for the first quarter is nine and a half. Anybody

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<v Speaker 1>anybody know anything about math, and it's still under. But

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<v Speaker 1>so two units on under for the first quarter, two

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<v Speaker 1>units on over. J Allen Hurts rushing yards Okay, that's

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<v Speaker 1>that's fifty and a half. Okay, two units on any

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<v Speaker 1>time t D for Jalen Hurts and two units on

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<v Speaker 1>any time t D for Travis Kelsey. What's the line

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<v Speaker 1>of the hurt what's the line of the Hurts? Minus

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<v Speaker 1>one fifteen? He's gone crumb. They're gonna do that scrumb

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<v Speaker 1>for the one and get a touchdown off it. Hurt.

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<v Speaker 1>Hold on, He's a rush for over fifty yards in

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<v Speaker 1>a game seven times this season, in case you care,

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<v Speaker 1>and the any time touchdown scores minus one fifteen as well. Okay,

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<v Speaker 1>so and you got two times on any time for

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<v Speaker 1>Kelsey and then I went three units on yes for

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<v Speaker 1>Gronk to kick that field goal at half time? Oh wow,

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<v Speaker 1>what line you give me? He's been practicing until like

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<v Speaker 1>two months and he's thirty some years old. He's got

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<v Speaker 1>to be able to kick a yard field goal. That's

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<v Speaker 1>plus four fifty. I want to let me. Let me

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<v Speaker 1>knock that down. Let me knock that down to one

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<v Speaker 1>unit down. Wasn't he gonna like parachute in or some

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<v Speaker 1>ship too? I don't know anything about it, um. I

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<v Speaker 1>think Van Duel's running some kind of promotion on it

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<v Speaker 1>and if he's been practicing, how can you not kick

0:14:21.080 --> 0:14:24.160
<v Speaker 1>a yard field hole? I can't. Maybe that'll be where

0:14:24.160 --> 0:14:26.720
<v Speaker 1>the donk comes from. He'll ring it off the uprights

0:14:26.720 --> 0:14:28.760
<v Speaker 1>and I'll hit my bet. You guys, would that be

0:14:28.800 --> 0:14:34.400
<v Speaker 1>a going if it's wrong? Okay, anything else bad, Larry

0:14:34.440 --> 0:14:37.720
<v Speaker 1>that you would like to offer? They're there, they're my picks.

0:14:38.160 --> 0:14:41.960
<v Speaker 1>A little research on these two. Uh shay, did you

0:14:42.000 --> 0:14:44.600
<v Speaker 1>have anything else get? You said you wanted to get

0:14:44.640 --> 0:14:51.160
<v Speaker 1>a little weird? Yeah, well, Danny, what day is today? Thursday?

0:14:51.800 --> 0:14:54.760
<v Speaker 1>All right, Thursday. That's no big deal for me. Uh.

0:14:54.800 --> 0:14:59.840
<v Speaker 1>The super Bowl is going to happen on a Sunday, right, yes, Okay,

0:15:00.160 --> 0:15:03.360
<v Speaker 1>after church, after praying, after talking to God, I'll have

0:15:03.400 --> 0:15:07.960
<v Speaker 1>more bets. Well, but we we can only take those

0:15:08.000 --> 0:15:13.200
<v Speaker 1>bets for this podcast today. Well that's not fair. Ain't

0:15:13.200 --> 0:15:15.680
<v Speaker 1>going to church today, Danny? We can, we can, we

0:15:15.680 --> 0:15:17.760
<v Speaker 1>can put them out on social media. We should shoot

0:15:17.760 --> 0:15:21.200
<v Speaker 1>you in the confessional making your picks now, just being

0:15:21.280 --> 0:15:25.120
<v Speaker 1>in churn. I'm a Protestant. I'm a Protestant. Alright, alright, alright,

0:15:25.160 --> 0:15:29.680
<v Speaker 1>there's a like are you going to church on Sunday?

0:15:30.200 --> 0:15:35.480
<v Speaker 1>Absolutely that I didn't think you went. You sounded like

0:15:35.520 --> 0:15:39.280
<v Speaker 1>that could be in doubt that you went to church. No,

0:15:39.520 --> 0:15:41.320
<v Speaker 1>I definitely go to church. It's just a matter of

0:15:41.360 --> 0:15:43.920
<v Speaker 1>what they let me in or not. I hold up

0:15:43.960 --> 0:15:50.280
<v Speaker 1>taking the under But okay, you're going to Larry? Yeah,

0:15:52.240 --> 0:15:55.480
<v Speaker 1>absolutely not for me. Okay, is there anything else that

0:15:55.520 --> 0:16:01.600
<v Speaker 1>we could all? I will shay, there is no way

0:16:01.680 --> 0:16:05.440
<v Speaker 1>you're going to heaven. I'll be selling air conditioning units

0:16:05.440 --> 0:16:08.360
<v Speaker 1>in hell right next to Lucifer, Danny. Nobody off me.

0:16:08.600 --> 0:16:12.920
<v Speaker 1>You are not going to heaven, and you know that

0:16:12.920 --> 0:16:16.280
<v Speaker 1>that's your parties in hell anyways. Dylan, do you think

0:16:16.280 --> 0:16:21.560
<v Speaker 1>you're going to heaven? Okay? Uh? God, Larry, do you

0:16:21.560 --> 0:16:24.440
<v Speaker 1>think you're going to heaven? There is no heaven or hell.

0:16:29.240 --> 0:16:33.520
<v Speaker 1>There's no afterlife. That's enough. That's enough. I'm not a

0:16:33.560 --> 0:16:39.560
<v Speaker 1>part of this anymore. You started this Catholic which was

0:16:39.640 --> 0:16:41.960
<v Speaker 1>Christmas and Easter only, but now I'm just never. I

0:16:42.000 --> 0:16:45.400
<v Speaker 1>don't mean, it's not even worth going fun, have fun

0:16:45.440 --> 0:16:53.320
<v Speaker 1>there up on burning? Burning? Huh Um. I will bet.

0:16:53.400 --> 0:16:54.840
<v Speaker 1>I will bet a hundred to one that you're going

0:16:54.880 --> 0:16:59.360
<v Speaker 1>to hell and burning. I'll do that right now. Maybe

0:16:59.360 --> 0:17:03.920
<v Speaker 1>you could parlor all three of us. Oh, I know,

0:17:03.960 --> 0:17:05.880
<v Speaker 1>I don't know if Bad Larry, if there is a Hell,

0:17:05.960 --> 0:17:09.399
<v Speaker 1>I don't think he's going to Hell Purgatory bank. Where's

0:17:09.440 --> 0:17:13.480
<v Speaker 1>he going then? Where's he going? Probably the track with

0:17:13.560 --> 0:17:18.160
<v Speaker 1>his good friend Jack Steymels, or going up to Providence,

0:17:18.240 --> 0:17:20.800
<v Speaker 1>or he's going to uh, some kind of regatta I

0:17:20.840 --> 0:17:23.080
<v Speaker 1>think is what he's gonna. I'm going straight, damn straight

0:17:23.119 --> 0:17:28.119
<v Speaker 1>to heaven. Well, he can't. He can't do what I

0:17:28.160 --> 0:17:31.720
<v Speaker 1>do for my community. It's not even it's not even regatta,

0:17:32.160 --> 0:17:36.760
<v Speaker 1>pumpkin regatta in the Lake of Fire. Have fun. Dylan

0:17:36.880 --> 0:17:39.840
<v Speaker 1>just said that Bad Larry can't go to uh how

0:17:39.920 --> 0:17:51.119
<v Speaker 1>he already lives in the Jersey Shore. I can't. I'm

0:17:51.119 --> 0:17:53.080
<v Speaker 1>gonna get you down here. Say I don't get you

0:17:53.119 --> 0:17:59.680
<v Speaker 1>both down here. During the summer. I'll be there, Larry.

0:17:59.520 --> 0:18:03.160
<v Speaker 1>See this, This is where it just gets tiring. Larry.

0:18:03.280 --> 0:18:06.280
<v Speaker 1>Just you drag it out. Game. I'm not sure if

0:18:06.280 --> 0:18:08.520
<v Speaker 1>I'm coming on Friday night now or Saturday morning. We're

0:18:08.520 --> 0:18:14.040
<v Speaker 1>debating that right now. I'm not here. You guys can

0:18:14.119 --> 0:18:19.239
<v Speaker 1>get tickets soft. The game was supposed to be two

0:18:19.280 --> 0:18:23.000
<v Speaker 1>o'clock on Saturday. Now it's four thirty on Saturday. We

0:18:23.040 --> 0:18:26.280
<v Speaker 1>don't know what I will be there. I'll be there.

0:18:26.480 --> 0:18:29.200
<v Speaker 1>We're coming for you, Larry. I can't. I hope. I

0:18:29.200 --> 0:18:32.080
<v Speaker 1>would love to see you, guys, that's honest. I would

0:18:32.080 --> 0:18:36.159
<v Speaker 1>love you. There's no way, there's no way. You don't

0:18:36.760 --> 0:18:39.840
<v Speaker 1>no no way they would go. But you'll get up

0:18:39.840 --> 0:18:41.920
<v Speaker 1>there and that you got to go to the game.

0:18:43.520 --> 0:18:48.080
<v Speaker 1>I'm absolutely probably they're bringing. They're bringing the fiftie anniversary

0:18:48.119 --> 0:18:50.920
<v Speaker 1>of seventy three Team Dan. You remember that team. Oh god,

0:18:51.520 --> 0:18:56.440
<v Speaker 1>everyone's coming back wild party. Okay, all right, well I

0:18:56.480 --> 0:18:58.840
<v Speaker 1>don't know what we accomplished, but we're done. And uh,

0:18:59.080 --> 0:19:02.600
<v Speaker 1>by the way, Shay and Irving has his own podcast.

0:19:02.720 --> 0:19:05.760
<v Speaker 1>It's uh Shannon Irving. That's the title of the podcast.

0:19:05.800 --> 0:19:08.280
<v Speaker 1>Wherever you get your podcast. So we were good. Anybody

0:19:08.280 --> 0:19:10.800
<v Speaker 1>else want add anything? I got just got one thing

0:19:10.840 --> 0:19:12.800
<v Speaker 1>for say say. I will text you the winners when

0:19:12.840 --> 0:19:15.760
<v Speaker 1>we get to the track. Yeah, I need a track.

0:19:15.920 --> 0:19:17.720
<v Speaker 1>I need a track. I need a track layer. I

0:19:17.800 --> 0:19:20.119
<v Speaker 1>need it bad. I'll send you guys a picture on

0:19:20.160 --> 0:19:23.400
<v Speaker 1>the on the screen. Good luck, good luck this weekend, everybody,

0:19:23.600 --> 0:19:27.200
<v Speaker 1>and thanks for joining us on Dan Patrick Takes Gamble.

0:19:28.480 --> 0:19:39.320
<v Speaker 1>Thanks ye