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Speaker 1: Cooking Yummy Food Seasons, Yummy Yummy Wrestle because you simply

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Speaker 1: don't have the ingredients to the podcast about cooking become Mysteries. Hi, everyone,

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Speaker 1: welcome to Cooking Sideways. We're changing things up a little

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Speaker 1: bit because we ran out of mysteries. So no, it's

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Speaker 1: kind of sad, but yeah, the internet is officially dry mysteries.

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Speaker 1: So here we are. So this this week, we're we're

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Speaker 1: gonna do the cooking show. Are you guys ready to

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Speaker 1: start cooking? I totally am. Yes, we got our studio,

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Speaker 1: I'm all ready to go. So I am Devin Um

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Speaker 1: and I'm joined by my two assistants, Joe and Steve. Great. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: well I should say excuse me to cook Joe and Um.

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Speaker 1: I think I think this week we're going to just

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Speaker 1: started off right. We're gonna start out with a favor

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Speaker 1: goat blood soup. I've always wanted to try this. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: good old Choopy, really good reviews of it. He really

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Speaker 1: loves this dish. So I think we're gonna try to

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Speaker 1: make him happy after running out of mysteries to um,

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Speaker 1: you know, deflect suspicion. Suspicion from him so un times. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: So um. Well, and there was that whole incident with

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Speaker 1: the mm hmmm mmm. Yeah, so we really need to

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Speaker 1: make him happy. So we're going to go ahead and

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Speaker 1: get started, all right, you guys ready, So we're gonna

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Speaker 1: make some blood soup. Yeah. Chippy asked us too, and

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Speaker 1: while he didn't really ask us to, but we decided

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Speaker 1: it would be healthy. Uh, and you get to be

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Speaker 1: the taster. By the way, So it's Choppy Supy super Cobra.

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Speaker 1: Where'd you get to Wrispy? It's from this book? Actually

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Speaker 1: I found it um at Powells and uh it's it

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Speaker 1: was in the occult section. Uh, there was a there's

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Speaker 1: this shelf in there that some of you may be

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Speaker 1: familiar with. It's it's it's labeled cursed. Please take um

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Speaker 1: it was free. Yeah, I love for stuff. That's awesome. Okay,

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Speaker 1: so m can you guys go get the stuff from

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Speaker 1: the goat. We need the blood, both intestines big and little,

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Speaker 1: the heart, the liver, and the pancreas. So let's go

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Speaker 1: where's the goat out back? Let's go get Okay, let's

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Speaker 1: go see Billy. And if you can't slaughter your own

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Speaker 1: goat store bodies is fine. Um, While they're doing that,

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Speaker 1: you'll also need half of an onion yellow as best,

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Speaker 1: four cloves of garlic more if you want. I personally

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Speaker 1: think there's no such thing as too much garlic. So

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Speaker 1: more is enough, more more than four is fine. Vinegar

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Speaker 1: just just white vinegar. White wine vinegar is fine. Um,

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Speaker 1: but I prefer apple cider vinegar, and then of course

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Speaker 1: salt and pepper to taste. Well, that was fun. Hey

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Speaker 1: we're back. Okay, So Steve, can you clean the intestines

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Speaker 1: and the pancreas really really well? And then Joe, can

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Speaker 1: you start chopping the onions and garlics? Yeah? Yeah, so

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Speaker 1: we want what about the head? Is that just for garnish?

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Speaker 1: Chuck it? Yeah, you can chuck it. You should not

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Speaker 1: have brought that in here. Actually, um, decorative Actually, so

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Speaker 1: we want a nice Julianne on. The onions and the

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Speaker 1: garlic can just be sliced. It doesn't need to be

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Speaker 1: diceter or anything like that. Um. So, well you guys

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Speaker 1: are doing that. I'm going to bring a big pot

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Speaker 1: of water to a boil. Um. So here, Steve, I

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Speaker 1: think it's so um. Now can you clean the rest

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Speaker 1: of the inners, the heart all that stuff. Thanks. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: doing good, buddy, I'll chop from stuff over here. Yeah. Um,

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Speaker 1: so now I'm just rubbing the oil um all over

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Speaker 1: the intestines and the pancreas to kind of extra clean though. Yeah, um,

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Speaker 1: ideally you would use coconut oil, but I'm allergic to

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Speaker 1: coconut oil, so I'm gonna just gonna use veggie oil. Um,

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Speaker 1: but coconut oil is the ideal or um. And then

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Speaker 1: we're just going to toss these into the pot to

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Speaker 1: clean them. Okay, and this stuff is clean finally great.

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Speaker 1: Can you guys get to work cutting all the rest

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Speaker 1: of the stuff up, um, all of the other innards

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Speaker 1: up and into um, I think one inch pieces is

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Speaker 1: probably fine. Okay, check it out. I spelled my name

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Speaker 1: with his intestines. Uh so these are these actually looking good? Um,

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Speaker 1: so we're gonna pull them out. I'm gonna have you

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Speaker 1: guys cut the intestines and the pancreas up as well.

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Speaker 1: All right here we are shopping away, you guys being

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Speaker 1: pretty good of them. I have never seen anywhere he

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Speaker 1: was so bad with a knife. My finger off my

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Speaker 1: up No okay, okay, no, you don't want to back

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Speaker 1: up to a guest. Jove, dude, So, Joe, you're bleeding

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Speaker 1: a lot, which is okay because this is blood soup,

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Speaker 1: so I'm not really that worried about it. But Steve

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Speaker 1: has just burned off part of his arm. Hello, I

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Speaker 1: think you guys really need to go to the emergency room.

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Speaker 1: Is one of you going to be okay to drive?

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Speaker 1: I guess him not. Man, I'll let you guys fight

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Speaker 1: it out. Yeah, get get out of here. Get just

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Speaker 1: get thank you, thank you. We'll be back. They're idiots, jeez. Okay,

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Speaker 1: it's actually we're almost done here anyhow, So this is

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Speaker 1: this is fine, and like I said, it is blood soup,

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Speaker 1: so I'm not really worried about Joe's blood getting in

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Speaker 1: it a little bit. I think Choopy will kind of

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Speaker 1: like that. So we're just gonna put all of the

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Speaker 1: good bits into a large pot over high heat and

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Speaker 1: just saute it a little bit and then add about

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Speaker 1: three tablespoons of vinegar, about one teaspoon of pepper, and

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Speaker 1: about a tablespoon of salt. But really to taste, you guys,

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Speaker 1: are you should know how to cook? You guys? Um? No,

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Speaker 1: just add to taste, and then we're gonna toss the

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Speaker 1: onions and the garlic in and start to combine. Oh,

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Speaker 1: those are smelling great actually, really um meaty, kind of

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Speaker 1: like a barnyard's. It's really nice. Um. So now the

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Speaker 1: tricky part to do alone, but I'm going to try

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Speaker 1: it anyway, is to add the blood. Um. It's really

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Speaker 1: important that you stir constantly at this point because if

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Speaker 1: you don't, if the blood isn't moving constantly, um, it's

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Speaker 1: going to clot into a big ball, and you'll be

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Speaker 1: in a really bad spot. Your whole people are going

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Speaker 1: to be ruined. So um, here we go. Wow, okay,

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Speaker 1: yeah that um yep, okay, uh don't oh man, okay,

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Speaker 1: it's smelling really good actually, um, and it's it's coming

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Speaker 1: together nicely. Just um. I really love the smell of iron,

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Speaker 1: don't you. Yeah. Um. So once the blood turns black, um,

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Speaker 1: you can stop ring and we're gonna let that cook

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Speaker 1: for about thirty to thirty five minutes. Um. And you

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Speaker 1: know what, actually, since the boys aren't here, I have

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Speaker 1: been waiting for years. I have this little set of

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Speaker 1: bloopers and just really clips of them being total idiots

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Speaker 1: like normal, but even more so so I think I'm

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Speaker 1: gonna play that because Steve's our editor and I actually

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Speaker 1: don't know how to edit things. So we're just gonna

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Speaker 1: play that wall this soup cooks and then um, I'll

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Speaker 1: come back. Um, I'll just play as long as it

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Speaker 1: takes to cook and then and then we'll come back

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Speaker 1: and we'll finish up this soup. Okay, right, So here's

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Speaker 1: some stuff. Okay, Um, I don't remember how these things work.

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Speaker 1: How does that fit? Okay? Yeah, okay, great, and here

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Speaker 1: we go. There you go. If you push it too much,

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Speaker 1: it goes click click, and it considers it a double clock. Okay,

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Speaker 1: that's what I did. Okay, yeah, apple him, Yeah, I know.

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna go to Adele work. Do not move to Adele.

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Speaker 1: I have adel at work. It Sucks's start recording. We're

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Speaker 1: not talking about Adele the singing artist. By the way,

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Speaker 1: us angry emails. Because this is going someplace. Let's go.

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Speaker 1: Let's do it, okay. John Signer, he wrote an article

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Speaker 1: and of course the the FBI immediately show up at

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Speaker 1: his doorstep when they figure out that this article is

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Speaker 1: out there. Sorry, you know, when you're ready. When they

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Speaker 1: figure out this article is out there, they talked to him.

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Speaker 1: They you're good. You've gotta that was my favorite ghost. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: you sound like a stupid ghost. I almost lost it.

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Speaker 1: I really almost lost it. You Ready, No more sneezes.

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Speaker 1: He's not ready, I don't think so. I'm good. Keep drinking.

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Speaker 1: I'll tell you that joke in an hour when we're

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Speaker 1: almost done with this story. Oh my god, if you

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Speaker 1: would stop talking, we could start huh huh okay what

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Speaker 1: mm hmmm? Where are we? Don't break it anything. I

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Speaker 1: can't make those promises. I can't make it. That's why

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Speaker 1: we have a little puppy guy. So theories. You're the

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Speaker 1: one who has it's you. You're the one who has

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Speaker 1: to edit this whatever. Her headphones were unplugged the whole time,

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Speaker 1: and she had no idea. The mixer was off. There

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Speaker 1: you go. Yeah, I just I just took a look

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Speaker 1: at our mix just to make sure we've definitely never

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Speaker 1: done that. Yeah, oh no, never Yeah. Okay, so all right, sorry,

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Speaker 1: very much like that. M hmm, have no idea, yeah, brainfest. Okay, Ready,

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Speaker 1: this is why he's not drinking. To me, he's already drunk,

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Speaker 1: already hammered. I think just being with you guys are

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Speaker 1: sipping stuff and carbonated. My body is just getting drunk alcohol. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I would say Anita. Okay, it's Anita. That's my massage therapy. Okay, okay, alright, alright,

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Speaker 1: find wait for that to be in the episode. Yeah, okay,

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Speaker 1: let me clear the throat one more time. It wasn't

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Speaker 1: just me podcasters throat. There we go, podcaster. Yeah, we

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Speaker 1: haven't had a new one, a new illness. I'm so

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Speaker 1: gonna go. Yeah for benefits that yeah, yeah, put your

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Speaker 1: cel bell. Yeah, I have podcasters show the black love. Alright, good, okay, ready, good, okay,

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Speaker 1: I know I'm an idiot here. Let me just fix

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Speaker 1: yourself so that we can all be in like a

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Speaker 1: big perfect By the way, I just tossed the chairs,

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Speaker 1: so if you want to readjust to well, Joe just

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Speaker 1: turned so he's more circly, and so I figured I'll

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Speaker 1: be more circly too. I like to we pointed that

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Speaker 1: way because anyone wasn't doing this to me this. Yeah, no,

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Speaker 1: no more pocket pool. So let's keep an ear out

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Speaker 1: for a me owing cat. I think people are crazy.

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Speaker 1: Nod was this in the train episode The sunset limited

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Speaker 1: So it's like it's like an hour and one minute

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Speaker 1: and twenty some seconds in and I'm talking it all

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Speaker 1: of a sudden you just here underneath my voice. It's

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Speaker 1: totally it was wonderful. But it's like, I think nothing

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Speaker 1: else there's I think that I I saw it happened

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Speaker 1: and thought, no when you here, because I was talking

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Speaker 1: over it and it must have just totally get picked

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Speaker 1: up by your mike. I'm sorry about that. That's okay.

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Speaker 1: We can always record. We can't at least we can't rerecord. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I just dust, you know. I think that I think

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Speaker 1: my allergies with the dosas allergy to be a lot better.

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Speaker 1: He just totally want when I was are you talking about? Okay,

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Speaker 1: I get it now. But it was job hunting a

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Speaker 1: couple of years ago. Um, there was like a post

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Speaker 1: on Craigslist that was like, I would like, I'm hiring

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Speaker 1: a housekeeper. I can't pay you, but I'm a young,

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Speaker 1: attractive man in my twenties, I'm fit, and also i'll

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Speaker 1: provide your uniform and I have a room that you

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Speaker 1: can live in. And it was like, well, that does

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Speaker 1: not what are you know? No, that's how people get murdered.

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Speaker 1: What Well, there's that whole damn daddy complex that crap.

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Speaker 1: That's that's the beginning, is that I'll just take care

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Speaker 1: of you. Remember I told you about that weirdo couple

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Speaker 1: I saw when we were in Jamaica, the Brazilian woman

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Speaker 1: who had the giant boobs with the fifty year old

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Speaker 1: man that she did not want to be with, and

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Speaker 1: he was like, he took her to Jamaica so she

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Speaker 1: hung out with him. You want to play this back.

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Speaker 1: So they always sounded already listened to the headphones. We

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Speaker 1: were fine, it's it's coming through my speaker. Sounded weird,

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Speaker 1: are you because I wasn't there. No, it's fine. You

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Speaker 1: always sound weird. Yeah, that's true. And you say like

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Speaker 1: like every third word. You can't even do it. You

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Speaker 1: can't even make fun of it. That's so funny. You

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Speaker 1: can't even make yourself if they like that. Many times,

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Speaker 1: like I'm it's like, okay, you guys ready to go? Yeah,

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Speaker 1: like let's get going. Yeah, it's just like let's just go.

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Speaker 1: Hey there, welcome to another episode of like thinking sideways. Okay,

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Speaker 1: let's start that again. Hey there, welcome to another episode

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Speaker 1: of thinking like ways. Okay, all right, now stop the

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Speaker 1: damn recording. Oh my god, we're fine, we're so funckey

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Speaker 1: Mickey McKey, Hey, Mickey, you're not going to start your

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Speaker 1: album here? You don't know, I don't know. I edited.

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Speaker 1: We didn't need to sing a song. Sometime I'll play

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Speaker 1: the guitar. I sing songs all the time. What are

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Speaker 1: you talking to? But yeah, so'll be thinking about what

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Speaker 1: song you want to saying? Come on, lesbian seagull, let's

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Speaker 1: go all right, let's do it? Okay, where was I

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Speaker 1: thatchly come through? I'm waiting? Yeah? Are they being abducted though? Like,

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Speaker 1: do we need go save a child? Don't anymore? Regardless,

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Speaker 1: not my child. You guys are the worst. Okay, Um,

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Speaker 1: the pronunciation Nazis are going to get us again. Well,

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Speaker 1: I don't want to do you guys want to record

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Speaker 1: a quick chuopy song? What is it? Chroop chop chop

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Speaker 1: chop chop tup chuper cubp? Is it like around? Is

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Speaker 1: it like ro ro row your boat? I don't think so.

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Speaker 1: It was a seventies song, Yeah, yeah, I mean you

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Speaker 1: chop familiar? Yeah, choop chup chop all together now right,

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Speaker 1: chop chop tupper cho cho cho. Hey, guys, welcome again

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Speaker 1: to another episode of thinking Sideways the podcast I am

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Speaker 1: Devin this year week, even years. Let me try New

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Speaker 1: Year somewhere. Yeah, I remember that one of sld on

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Speaker 1: did you hear did you ever hear that thing of

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Speaker 1: there's the one with the ants trying to take the

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Speaker 1: baby down the ant hill. Yeah, you've seen that one.

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Speaker 1: They realize it's not going to fit well with the

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Speaker 1: first revision of that, or the first version of that

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Speaker 1: was he was they were carrying an old man, and

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Speaker 1: everybody rejected it because it's not fair that seniors are

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Speaker 1: old and can't defend themselves. So he changed it to

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Speaker 1: a baby and they accepted it. Okay, Joyce, I really

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Speaker 1: want you to put that into the next year's bloopers

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Speaker 1: reel so that people can hear that you guys are

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Speaker 1: kind of lame sometimes. Yeah, definitely deleting this ready, Okay, okay, fine, Hey,

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Speaker 1: let's go co we start now. This is my dog,

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Speaker 1: it's his normal voice. That's right. I think at the

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Speaker 1: rest of the time, we're ready if you would let

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Speaker 1: me go. Where's my ball? Oh god, hey, guys, we are.

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Speaker 1: We've got to get through eight pages tonight, Jesus. It's okay.

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Speaker 1: I'm willing to stay up late, let's go. Did you

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Speaker 1: mention her nickname shark bait? Oh my god, Oh my god,

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Speaker 1: you're gonna roll immediately into what do you call a guy?

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Speaker 1: When we can't do that? We really can't do that.

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Speaker 1: I really can't do that. Well, I'm gonna imagine sharks

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Speaker 1: later on. Just okay, but we can't choke about it.

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Speaker 1: I really can't joke about it. Um, you said before,

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Speaker 1: I said before, Okay, what I know, I wrote it

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Speaker 1: that way, but that's not what I meant. Take better

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Speaker 1: than I can write that one. Sorry, I read it

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Speaker 1: the math after I wrote my script. I don't know

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Speaker 1: what you want for me. Let's do it, but m don't,

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Speaker 1: don't don't. Okay, yeah, okay, ready, so did you were

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Speaker 1: you going to ask something specific regarding just okay? No, no, yeah,

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Speaker 1: it's a I'll go ahead, just continue. What what are

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Speaker 1: you doing? And keep telling your story? Devin? Thank you?

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Speaker 1: It's okay? Are you just sitting there? You you had

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Speaker 1: all the time. You're always like, let's ask a funny

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Speaker 1: question and let Steve try to like add lib something.

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Speaker 1: But I'm not recording, so it's just gonna be amazing

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Speaker 1: and hilarious and avoid I don't. I just don't want

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Speaker 1: to start too early, because then Steve has to edit

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Speaker 1: it all out. Steven doesn't care. He cares, He loves me,

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Speaker 1: cares for me, looking out for me. What got my back?

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Speaker 1: What's that look? I'm sorry that I'm the evil child

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Speaker 1: of this family. Yet to do pause for buses, suil

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Speaker 1: suids palm sentence Palm. Saspree is a small village in

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Speaker 1: southern France. Uh as of the two thousand twelve cents

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Speaker 1: is as of the two thousand twelve sentence sent okay,

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Speaker 1: as of the two thousand and twelve sentence Okay, all right,

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Speaker 1: I'm sorry. Did you not hear Joe just say don't

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Speaker 1: eat old nuts? Sorry, I'm not twelve at the moment.

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Speaker 1: Apparently this time there's certain old old nuts that you

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Speaker 1: can eat. But other than that, stay away in the shade.

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Speaker 1: So far good, they work. Well, yeah, we all see

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Speaker 1: that I'm napping while yeah we we won't know. I

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Speaker 1: don't snore like everybody who snore says. It does kind

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Speaker 1: of look like, no, take this out, you're freaking me out.

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Speaker 1: All right, you're ready snore source a right, Apparently I'm

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Speaker 1: not the one you have to be concerned about. I

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Speaker 1: knew that was coming. I could see the look on

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Speaker 1: your face. I'm like, I'm just gonna wait, all right, ready,

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Speaker 1: by the way, I look, I know I look a

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Speaker 1: little frowsy, but it's because my hairdresser is retired from

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Speaker 1: the profession and so I have to find a new

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Speaker 1: That was a thing, but I don't know. So I'm

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Speaker 1: that's that's gonna be just tired of taking Joe as

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Speaker 1: a client. That could be she's tired of having you

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Speaker 1: at her house. That could be that. Yeah, she's just

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Speaker 1: scared because you're always talking about guns and I'm always

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Speaker 1: saying like Republican things. Yeah, I'm always saying, oh, yes,

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Speaker 1: you have that's nice hair. It's just beautiful skin, nice hands.

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Speaker 1: Wash my hair again? Would you touch me here? Yeah? Okay,

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Speaker 1: we gotta start this episode. Yeah, I actually love me out. Okay, Sorry,

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Speaker 1: I look on your face like you were going to

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Speaker 1: say something while you're positive legs though theory number one.

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Speaker 1: Theory numbers one is that a man that this is have.

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna go get Fred fence Stone because that makes

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Speaker 1: just as much sense as what I just said. True.

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Speaker 1: We need a theme song for the theory machine. That's

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Speaker 1: a good What does Scooby do do do? Do? Do? Do? Do? Do? Do?

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Speaker 1: Do do do? Right? I like I'd like something like

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Speaker 1: like out of like a commercial from the from the

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Speaker 1: City where a much of high based voices go, I

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Speaker 1: know you like that? Yeah, I think, I think? I think?

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Speaker 1: Actually there was what was that? There was that mystery

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Speaker 1: that was folding around for a while of um, who

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Speaker 1: were the Bad Crown singers of this one obscure album?

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Speaker 1: Does this sound familiar to not even a little? Maybe anyway,

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Speaker 1: we'll figure something out. Let me go ahead and try

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Speaker 1: this over again. Okay you guys ready, no, no, you

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Speaker 1: know this story kind of breaks my heart? Why oh

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Speaker 1: I like Paul Fault. How do you know you like Paul?

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Speaker 1: Were you alive when Paul was alive? Oh? Damn it?

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Speaker 1: Times I forget Okay, you guys ready, yeah, So Devin,

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Speaker 1: what do you think we need to balance out the

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Speaker 1: light situation in here? Should that be on or should

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Speaker 1: be off? Okay, kidding, kidding, broom read line and everything. Okay,

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Speaker 1: you have misspellings all over the place, dropped letters, my grandma,

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Speaker 1: I do drop words a lot, duys me crazy, even

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Speaker 1: you can drop words. I probably do I know you

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Speaker 1: started to say my grammar, but she stopped in the

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Speaker 1: middle and it was just my grand ball there you

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Speaker 1: I mean, you don't really want devon On Absen talking

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Speaker 1: about hookers? Do you maybe murdered hookers? Maybe? Do you?

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Speaker 1: We can we can start being like the last podcast

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Speaker 1: on the left. Um. When I was little, I didn't

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Speaker 1: know how to read until I was like in third grade.

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Speaker 1: It was like true, I didn't know how to read.

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Speaker 1: I had to work with a tutor because I couldn't

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Speaker 1: read for whatever reason. No, I didn't even really fake it.

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Speaker 1: I just would be like no, I's hired. Um. And

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Speaker 1: my mom was a special ed teacher, so she was

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Speaker 1: trying her tactics on me. It didn't work, but she

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Speaker 1: would always say, just, um, look at the shape of

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Speaker 1: the word, and guests and go. Those were the two

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Speaker 1: ways that she tried to get me to learn how

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Speaker 1: to read. So to this day, I'll look at the

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Speaker 1: shape award and I'll guess it go and I just

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Speaker 1: and I guess and go, and that's like it, like

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Speaker 1: I guess what that word is without even like paying

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Speaker 1: attention to it. I'm like, I don't know, that's a

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Speaker 1: general shape of that word. I think it's going to

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00:27:13,160 --> 00:27:15,280
Speaker 1: be I've guessed it's that one. It's that one from

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Speaker 1: now on. So acquired savants turned to cerns into servants,

359
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Speaker 1: no matter. I used to do that when I read

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Speaker 1: as a teenager. Yeah, yeah, I mean it's fine when

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Speaker 1: you have contextual clues right when you're reading prose, it's

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Speaker 1: totally fine, because then you'll go back and be like,

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Speaker 1: that doesn't make sense. You read again, you're like, oh,

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Speaker 1: that's why it doesn't make sense. But when you've got

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00:27:34,480 --> 00:27:42,040
Speaker 1: g macrony because macaron I think that's how most people

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Speaker 1: read is they don't actually you know, they actually just

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Speaker 1: recognize the word partically self correct because they actually look

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Speaker 1: at it versus me just being like, nope, that's what

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Speaker 1: it is. Deal with it. It's funny. Our science is

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Speaker 1: so bad. Actually, I took a science as an online

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Speaker 1: science quiz just today and I scored high. You scored

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Speaker 1: as being high. Yeah, get rode back. You've been smoking

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Speaker 1: the earth a star wars. Damn it? Okay? Is it

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Speaker 1: okay for me to say damn it? We've we've slowly

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00:28:18,920 --> 00:28:23,200
Speaker 1: started swearing more and more, so it's yeah, we've we've

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Speaker 1: we used to be really tight. And then we're like, yeah,

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Speaker 1: can we say fudge sticks? Can we say so fucking?

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Speaker 1: Can we say fuck him? It's a restaurant, you know,

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Speaker 1: probably I don't give a lot of fox Fox. Do

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Speaker 1: you want to alternate that's reading these off or do

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Speaker 1: you want to just read it all yourself? I think

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Speaker 1: I'll read it myself. But I'd like you guys to

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Speaker 1: react to the things. I'm perfects. It's like I paid

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00:29:01,320 --> 00:29:08,080
Speaker 1: you to say that. Thank God, please this year? Can

385
00:29:08,160 --> 00:29:17,479
Speaker 1: we release unedited? Please this year? Holy cat scratch. Tricky

386
00:29:17,680 --> 00:29:23,240
Speaker 1: dating sites? Do they have such things? They have farmers only,

387
00:29:23,440 --> 00:29:26,160
Speaker 1: a dating site for only farmers. That's a thing in

388
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Speaker 1: this world. They have cat owners. You should sign up.

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Speaker 1: I should you get a lot of tail? I hope

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00:29:32,760 --> 00:29:37,160
Speaker 1: I would get a lot of tail. It's like cats

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00:29:37,200 --> 00:29:39,960
Speaker 1: as cats are so awesome that women want to date me.

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Speaker 1: Just be around my cats. Yeah? About that. The North

393
00:29:44,840 --> 00:29:51,080
Speaker 1: American Marlon Brando look like association. No oh, no, excuse me, sorry,

394
00:29:51,440 --> 00:29:55,440
Speaker 1: the North American Marlin The North American Martlin Brando look

395
00:29:55,480 --> 00:30:02,400
Speaker 1: alike association. No, no, no, the North the North American

396
00:30:02,480 --> 00:30:10,520
Speaker 1: Marlon Brando lookalikes over back or overton? Oh? Okay, you're

397
00:30:10,560 --> 00:30:13,280
Speaker 1: right over back. I did it. Oh my god, you

398
00:30:13,360 --> 00:30:15,400
Speaker 1: were all over the map right now. I'm getting my

399
00:30:15,480 --> 00:30:19,360
Speaker 1: names wrong here over back? Yeah, what is my name? Devin?

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Speaker 1: H m hm. Hey, I just want to say you guys,

401
00:30:24,120 --> 00:30:31,000
Speaker 1: they're naming beer after me, not after you guys. That's true, right,

402
00:30:31,320 --> 00:30:41,680
Speaker 1: because I'm so hot? Yeah, got it? Okay, that's clear

403
00:30:42,400 --> 00:30:48,400
Speaker 1: to continue. Where are we at here? Store salt stares.

404
00:30:49,040 --> 00:30:50,560
Speaker 1: It just seems to be like they've been skipping on

405
00:30:50,600 --> 00:30:55,800
Speaker 1: the salt they have, but you evidently need a lick apparently.

406
00:30:56,120 --> 00:30:59,440
Speaker 1: I think they sell those at the Meta Salt Lick.

407
00:31:00,160 --> 00:31:01,520
Speaker 1: I just put it out in the living room and

408
00:31:01,560 --> 00:31:03,800
Speaker 1: we'll just get them all fours and look at it.

409
00:31:03,840 --> 00:31:16,320
Speaker 1: Sounds like, okay, I'm gonna slip on that and fall. Yeah,

410
00:31:16,520 --> 00:31:18,880
Speaker 1: we've been had to break tast Steve. We've been trying

411
00:31:18,880 --> 00:31:22,880
Speaker 1: to replace you. Here. We got Justin on the hook. Yeah,

412
00:31:23,040 --> 00:31:26,000
Speaker 1: he's ready to move out here. Yeah, it's perfect. We're

413
00:31:26,000 --> 00:31:31,480
Speaker 1: gonna make that three fans so happy, Mike's going to

414
00:31:31,600 --> 00:31:35,120
Speaker 1: join our podcast. We're all going to make a hundred

415
00:31:35,200 --> 00:31:38,240
Speaker 1: thousand dollars a year, a lot more than that for

416
00:31:38,400 --> 00:31:41,360
Speaker 1: a three person to a four person square table story. Yeah,

417
00:31:41,400 --> 00:31:45,880
Speaker 1: that's perfect. Can you start talking? Mike's like, I'm not

418
00:31:46,160 --> 00:31:55,160
Speaker 1: done getting the story. I'm not done. Sorry, Yeah, we're

419
00:31:55,200 --> 00:32:04,160
Speaker 1: just kidding, Mike. Please don't come kill Oh my god,

420
00:32:08,360 --> 00:32:15,400
Speaker 1: fat cat, silly cat, digging little box. Oh, smelly cat.

421
00:32:16,480 --> 00:32:22,080
Speaker 1: What are they feeding the smelly cat? Oh? Smelly cat?

422
00:32:22,840 --> 00:32:33,880
Speaker 1: Why don't they care? Ready? No, no, cats, still in

423
00:32:33,920 --> 00:32:36,800
Speaker 1: the box. Cat is going to keep going, cat in

424
00:32:36,840 --> 00:32:44,440
Speaker 1: the box. Okay, yeah, he goes, wasn't I wasn't making

425
00:32:44,440 --> 00:32:57,680
Speaker 1: it up. Hmmm mm hmm. Okay, ready three freedom, alright, ready, okay,

426
00:33:01,680 --> 00:33:08,560
Speaker 1: So Samora Michelle Samosa, not Mimosa. He is not a

427
00:33:08,720 --> 00:33:13,760
Speaker 1: champagne drink Samosa. Nope. Deep fried potato dish, no, dang it, nope,

428
00:33:13,840 --> 00:33:20,000
Speaker 1: I'm hungry. Hey there and welcome to another episode of

429
00:33:20,160 --> 00:33:24,880
Speaker 1: Thinking Sideways. I am Steve, as always joined by and

430
00:33:25,080 --> 00:33:27,840
Speaker 1: dev and once again we have a mystery for you,

431
00:33:29,040 --> 00:33:33,040
Speaker 1: which is, why does that prince keep sending me emails

432
00:33:33,120 --> 00:33:37,480
Speaker 1: when there isn't actually any Nairobian princess. I thought they

433
00:33:37,520 --> 00:33:41,719
Speaker 1: were like Nigerian Nigerian. They have been deposed. That's why

434
00:33:41,760 --> 00:33:44,800
Speaker 1: they're emailing is because they're you know, they're not have

435
00:33:44,880 --> 00:33:46,600
Speaker 1: to flee the country, but you can't take suitcases of

436
00:33:46,680 --> 00:33:49,200
Speaker 1: cash with him, so he's got to transfer to you. Okay, Okay,

437
00:33:49,240 --> 00:33:51,520
Speaker 1: well then we probably shouldn't do that. Mystery um, okay.

438
00:33:51,800 --> 00:33:54,520
Speaker 1: This week's mystery is why is porn so focused on

439
00:33:54,600 --> 00:34:03,040
Speaker 1: butt sex? That's a good question because humans are focused

440
00:34:03,080 --> 00:34:07,320
Speaker 1: on who doesn't like it up the ass? Actually? I

441
00:34:07,360 --> 00:34:10,160
Speaker 1: don't really like it up the ass? Have you tried it?

442
00:34:10,880 --> 00:34:16,960
Speaker 1: I tried it the other direction, but medically I hyetically administered.

443
00:34:19,880 --> 00:34:23,680
Speaker 1: Hang on, I'm gonna get a little closer to Mike. Alright, ready,

444
00:34:23,800 --> 00:34:25,520
Speaker 1: Why don't you have to get closer to Mike? That

445
00:34:25,600 --> 00:34:30,399
Speaker 1: makes Mike uncomfortable? No? Sorry, I'm like touch him down here,

446
00:34:32,400 --> 00:34:36,040
Speaker 1: like shaft alone. I don't even talk about his cables.

447
00:34:36,200 --> 00:34:37,800
Speaker 1: I don't know what it is my it's a wavelength

448
00:34:37,840 --> 00:34:39,279
Speaker 1: of my voice. But it does sound like you know,

449
00:34:39,400 --> 00:34:42,160
Speaker 1: it's harder to hear than your guys voice voices you

450
00:34:42,200 --> 00:34:48,480
Speaker 1: guys sound because it's lower. And then he um, and

451
00:34:48,560 --> 00:34:50,200
Speaker 1: then he takes off all his clothes because he doesn't

452
00:34:50,200 --> 00:34:52,400
Speaker 1: want to get his clothes bloody, right, And then he

453
00:34:52,480 --> 00:34:55,239
Speaker 1: calls her inside and jumps here and scripts her and

454
00:34:55,360 --> 00:34:57,800
Speaker 1: strangles her and cuts her body into pieces. But he

455
00:34:57,920 --> 00:35:00,040
Speaker 1: put all this whole stuff in lure detail in to

456
00:35:00,120 --> 00:35:03,400
Speaker 1: a letter to the little girl's mother, and it's just

457
00:35:03,920 --> 00:35:05,640
Speaker 1: just reading about it, you know. But luckily that was

458
00:35:05,680 --> 00:35:07,839
Speaker 1: his downfall because they managed to trace the letter back

459
00:35:07,880 --> 00:35:09,920
Speaker 1: to him and he got arrested and think he got

460
00:35:09,960 --> 00:35:12,520
Speaker 1: fried in the electric share for it. But if I

461
00:35:12,560 --> 00:35:15,080
Speaker 1: feel so much better for you having shared that story

462
00:35:15,160 --> 00:35:19,280
Speaker 1: with you. It really is just an uplifting way to start.

463
00:35:20,520 --> 00:35:23,760
Speaker 1: I just had to hit record here because I wanted

464
00:35:25,680 --> 00:35:29,640
Speaker 1: documentation of like what we talked about before we record episodes.

465
00:35:31,480 --> 00:35:33,600
Speaker 1: It was an interesting little articles. So there was interference

466
00:35:33,600 --> 00:35:36,239
Speaker 1: and they're sorry, I was walking around and stuff. Now

467
00:35:36,280 --> 00:35:38,000
Speaker 1: that's okay. Do you want to talk about this boil

468
00:35:38,080 --> 00:35:41,520
Speaker 1: I've got. Yeah, let's hear it. How about my hemorrhoids? Yeah,

469
00:35:42,160 --> 00:35:45,640
Speaker 1: this is a t m I episode. Everybody before warned

470
00:35:46,800 --> 00:35:52,279
Speaker 1: we've changed the initials of our podcast for ye tom I. Hi,

471
00:35:52,560 --> 00:35:54,600
Speaker 1: Hi there, welcome to another episode of t M I.

472
00:35:55,040 --> 00:35:59,800
Speaker 1: This week we're gonna talk about my hemorrhoids. It inscrutiating,

473
00:36:00,120 --> 00:36:05,560
Speaker 1: robbing detail. Yeah. Hey, well, if we ever run out

474
00:36:05,600 --> 00:36:06,960
Speaker 1: of mysteries, I think t M I would be a

475
00:36:07,000 --> 00:36:10,759
Speaker 1: good podcast. I don't think I really don't think it would.

476
00:36:11,920 --> 00:36:14,239
Speaker 1: There's a lot of people that want to share. That's

477
00:36:14,280 --> 00:36:19,600
Speaker 1: the problem. Yeah, there's a lot of theories in this story,

478
00:36:19,719 --> 00:36:23,120
Speaker 1: and I intend to drag out every single one. You

479
00:36:23,160 --> 00:36:26,160
Speaker 1: don't know how long I've been awake this morning. It's

480
00:36:26,200 --> 00:36:28,880
Speaker 1: not morning anymore. I know that's the side of how

481
00:36:28,920 --> 00:36:37,640
Speaker 1: long you've been awake? Okay, do you want me to

482
00:36:37,680 --> 00:36:40,040
Speaker 1: do it in Australia accent? No? I think that's good enough,

483
00:36:40,200 --> 00:36:42,319
Speaker 1: because well, unless you can think you can pull it off.

484
00:36:44,640 --> 00:36:47,440
Speaker 1: But it's going to use an an appropriate word. I'm sorry.

485
00:36:49,719 --> 00:36:54,399
Speaker 1: Could they call everybody? Oh? Yeah, you can't word in there?

486
00:36:54,960 --> 00:37:02,000
Speaker 1: That's fine, it's fine. You've never made you actually before?

487
00:37:02,000 --> 00:37:09,600
Speaker 1: It still gross? Continue on, all right, hang on, jitterbugging McKinley,

488
00:37:09,920 --> 00:37:14,120
Speaker 1: a break Newtonian inferring cop Update Co and their collaborative

489
00:37:15,000 --> 00:37:19,239
Speaker 1: excuse me, collaborate. Yeah, okay, all right? Is this better?

490
00:37:19,239 --> 00:37:22,440
Speaker 1: It would be like more sort of morimotow jitterbug McKinley,

491
00:37:22,480 --> 00:37:25,440
Speaker 1: a break tony An inferring cop Update Co and their

492
00:37:25,680 --> 00:37:49,839
Speaker 1: collaborate roof fine bitches. You Devin take one, Devin take three?

493
00:37:51,040 --> 00:37:58,440
Speaker 1: Okay you ready? Are you going back to the one

494
00:37:58,480 --> 00:38:00,400
Speaker 1: that you skipped, which is out for ja oh yea,

495
00:38:00,400 --> 00:38:04,080
Speaker 1: I'm gonna get to him in a second. Yeah, yeah, yeah,

496
00:38:04,080 --> 00:38:06,040
Speaker 1: I'm going out of order or anywa. That's why I'm

497
00:38:06,680 --> 00:38:09,759
Speaker 1: I just mentioned watching you trying to hand signal. It's

498
00:38:09,920 --> 00:38:15,239
Speaker 1: Joe has been a treat where you're just like, because

499
00:38:15,280 --> 00:38:20,680
Speaker 1: he doesn't he's not totally totally missing the whole thing. Usual.

500
00:38:21,200 --> 00:38:26,279
Speaker 1: I reminded that scene from Airplane, Remember that scene he's going,

501
00:38:28,320 --> 00:38:37,319
Speaker 1: it's exactly that. Yeah, totally okay, alright. Stylist Jane may

502
00:38:37,440 --> 00:38:39,279
Speaker 1: have rung about for some of you because he's kind

503
00:38:39,320 --> 00:38:44,640
Speaker 1: of famous in the Chicago area. Slash connected and implicanted. Implicanted.

504
00:38:45,480 --> 00:38:50,240
Speaker 1: I like it. I love it when you make good jokes.

505
00:38:50,320 --> 00:38:52,239
Speaker 1: But you realize we haven't been recording, and you go

506
00:38:54,040 --> 00:38:55,680
Speaker 1: and then you turn it on like you think you're

507
00:38:55,680 --> 00:38:58,840
Speaker 1: going to be able to recreate that moment, just like

508
00:38:59,000 --> 00:39:01,960
Speaker 1: sex premut surely ejaculated. I'm like, I'm gonna make it

509
00:39:02,040 --> 00:39:05,480
Speaker 1: like it was better. I'm just gonna roll over, go sleep,

510
00:39:06,239 --> 00:39:08,280
Speaker 1: just gonna cry in the fetal position for three hours,

511
00:39:10,000 --> 00:39:12,239
Speaker 1: silently in the shower. Oh I wondered to do is

512
00:39:12,360 --> 00:39:17,879
Speaker 1: give you a sorry, you gotta just the magic words

513
00:39:17,920 --> 00:39:19,759
Speaker 1: to get yourself out of that. Just say, look as

514
00:39:19,840 --> 00:39:23,560
Speaker 1: much time as I did, I think we've discovered the

515
00:39:23,600 --> 00:39:29,880
Speaker 1: reason that Joe's single. All Right, we're ready, all right,

516
00:39:29,960 --> 00:39:32,640
Speaker 1: let's get this, uh this little show but rocking and rolling.

517
00:39:35,680 --> 00:39:41,279
Speaker 1: So and she did a suicidal tendencies, not giving self immolation,

518
00:39:41,480 --> 00:39:44,439
Speaker 1: nothing like that, nothing that would indicate that you would

519
00:39:44,440 --> 00:39:47,799
Speaker 1: have brought something down like this upon herself. So yes,

520
00:39:48,200 --> 00:39:52,240
Speaker 1: no self immolation at all. Not given to just burning

521
00:39:52,320 --> 00:40:06,440
Speaker 1: herself self burning tendencies here, okay, not predisposed to longest

522
00:40:06,560 --> 00:40:16,600
Speaker 1: throat clearing enough history. Some of the meals available in

523
00:40:16,840 --> 00:40:20,960
Speaker 1: February are roasted pork with apple walnut and fra ro

524
00:40:21,160 --> 00:40:24,280
Speaker 1: salad and crispy I'm not doing that one. I cannot

525
00:40:24,320 --> 00:40:29,640
Speaker 1: say half of these freaking words. All right, let's talk

526
00:40:29,680 --> 00:40:34,439
Speaker 1: about a lizard scaly story. I mean, that's that cell

527
00:40:34,520 --> 00:40:39,160
Speaker 1: phone picture of the lizard. We're going. We'll talk him.

528
00:40:39,200 --> 00:40:56,040
Speaker 1: Let's talk about when the time comes, okay, right, lezard, Okay, okay,

529
00:40:56,600 --> 00:41:03,560
Speaker 1: he's ready, see signor? Am I a senora at this point?

530
00:41:04,160 --> 00:41:07,719
Speaker 1: I don't know my Spanish? Okay, I know taco and

531
00:41:07,800 --> 00:41:14,200
Speaker 1: burrito and Enchilada. You know more than that. Yeah, say

532
00:41:14,360 --> 00:41:21,200
Speaker 1: sensitive about these things. Okay, Hey, yeah, you're just sitting

533
00:41:21,239 --> 00:41:23,600
Speaker 1: there staring at the computer For a minute. He kept

534
00:41:23,640 --> 00:41:26,759
Speaker 1: trying to get it to push. Okay, No, Well, I

535
00:41:26,840 --> 00:41:29,319
Speaker 1: see whenever I go anywhere, I see people staring at

536
00:41:29,360 --> 00:41:31,920
Speaker 1: computers and stuff. So I just assume this what you do?

537
00:41:32,160 --> 00:41:37,080
Speaker 1: You just stare at that? Yeah, I mean is that

538
00:41:37,239 --> 00:41:39,399
Speaker 1: not what you're supposed to know? You usually do something

539
00:41:39,480 --> 00:41:42,239
Speaker 1: on them, you interact with them. I know this is

540
00:41:42,280 --> 00:41:46,640
Speaker 1: a hard concept for you. Yeah, as an old man,

541
00:41:46,719 --> 00:42:02,440
Speaker 1: I understand. Hang on a second to any farm. Okay,

542
00:42:02,560 --> 00:42:23,399
Speaker 1: there we go. Steve's voicemail is broken. This is his refrigerator.

543
00:42:23,880 --> 00:42:26,759
Speaker 1: Please speak very slowly and I'll stick your message to

544
00:42:26,920 --> 00:42:31,960
Speaker 1: myself with one of these magnets. Hey it's me. It's

545
00:42:32,239 --> 00:42:35,600
Speaker 1: uh sonny morning. I'm heading up to the Platinus River

546
00:42:35,680 --> 00:42:38,120
Speaker 1: to do a little RAPTI. I'm going to do the

547
00:42:38,200 --> 00:42:40,440
Speaker 1: upper Clatumus, which is a little more well a lot

548
00:42:40,520 --> 00:42:43,920
Speaker 1: more dangerous than the lower Claquinus. But yeah, so if

549
00:42:43,960 --> 00:42:50,239
Speaker 1: I drowned, um I um. Katie is my cat's godfather

550
00:42:50,640 --> 00:42:52,400
Speaker 1: god mother. I guess she's try to fight it to

551
00:42:52,480 --> 00:42:56,160
Speaker 1: a new good home, so yeah, please let her know. Um,

552
00:42:56,320 --> 00:42:59,480
Speaker 1: and also you're gonna need to replace me on the show.

553
00:42:59,760 --> 00:43:04,320
Speaker 1: And second will be a good queshment. That's got it

554
00:43:07,480 --> 00:43:11,120
Speaker 1: through the magic of me editing, figuring out how to

555
00:43:11,280 --> 00:43:15,080
Speaker 1: edit in the studio. We're back. Um so oh actually, um,

556
00:43:15,120 --> 00:43:17,080
Speaker 1: I think I just heard a car door slam that

557
00:43:17,239 --> 00:43:28,840
Speaker 1: was actually good timing. Oh hey, um, no crap they

558
00:43:28,880 --> 00:43:30,719
Speaker 1: were asking about at the R. I guess I'm gonna

559
00:43:30,760 --> 00:43:32,960
Speaker 1: have to just do with that. That's okay, it's you know,

560
00:43:33,320 --> 00:43:36,560
Speaker 1: gives you a good story or something. The guy who's

561
00:43:36,600 --> 00:43:40,840
Speaker 1: complaining he lost a finger chip, I'm one giant boil

562
00:43:40,920 --> 00:43:42,759
Speaker 1: on the right side of my ball, I know. But

563
00:43:42,840 --> 00:43:45,160
Speaker 1: you know what, that fish skin looks like. It's gonna

564
00:43:45,360 --> 00:43:53,640
Speaker 1: heal that right up? Yeah for weeks. Yeah, so you

565
00:43:53,719 --> 00:43:56,600
Speaker 1: guys actually came back. It's it's perfect. Um, I'm just

566
00:43:56,640 --> 00:43:59,040
Speaker 1: gonna add I'm just gonna put the finishing touches on

567
00:43:59,160 --> 00:44:03,160
Speaker 1: this and then um, we should be good. So the

568
00:44:03,320 --> 00:44:05,360
Speaker 1: soup has been cooking for it's been cooking for about

569
00:44:05,400 --> 00:44:07,840
Speaker 1: thirty five minutes. Um, do you guys smell that? It

570
00:44:07,880 --> 00:44:10,239
Speaker 1: smells really good? Right, Yeah, So I'm just gonna add

571
00:44:10,280 --> 00:44:14,080
Speaker 1: a little bit of water, about a cup of cold water,

572
00:44:14,320 --> 00:44:16,239
Speaker 1: and then let that come up to heat just for

573
00:44:16,280 --> 00:44:21,479
Speaker 1: about one minute. Um, how's the e er good? Oh god,

574
00:44:23,000 --> 00:44:25,400
Speaker 1: it was good time. Trouble with the rs is it?

575
00:44:25,520 --> 00:44:28,279
Speaker 1: Let just anybody in there. That's why we're back so fast.

576
00:44:28,320 --> 00:44:31,719
Speaker 1: They kicked him out because he was complaining about next time,

577
00:44:32,120 --> 00:44:35,360
Speaker 1: next time, bring the frigging fingertip. Yeah, okay, okay, so

578
00:44:35,600 --> 00:44:38,040
Speaker 1: this is this is perfect temperature. Um, so we're just

579
00:44:38,040 --> 00:44:40,719
Speaker 1: gonna pull it off the heat. And traditionally we would

580
00:44:40,719 --> 00:44:43,160
Speaker 1: serve this over rice, but I'm kind of thinking that

581
00:44:43,239 --> 00:44:47,719
Speaker 1: Choopy is not going to care. Um. And one one

582
00:44:48,080 --> 00:44:53,239
Speaker 1: last note here. It looks like it was handwritten in here.

583
00:44:53,280 --> 00:44:57,960
Speaker 1: It says, yeah, it says the summon the chuop a

584
00:44:58,080 --> 00:45:01,919
Speaker 1: cobra by seeing his knee three times over the soup.

585
00:45:02,680 --> 00:45:06,120
Speaker 1: So whatever you do, don't say chippy cheepy Chuopy. I

586
00:45:07,000 --> 00:45:09,239
Speaker 1: really wish you had just not been standing over the

587
00:45:09,280 --> 00:45:35,440
Speaker 1: pot right now. Oh um, watch how he cut a cigar.

588
00:45:55,320 --> 00:45:58,160
Speaker 1: Oh don't. Will it never end war