1
00:00:07,240 --> 00:00:11,080
Speaker 1: Welcome back to Bachelor Happy Hours Golden Hour. Thank you

2
00:00:11,280 --> 00:00:13,920
Speaker 1: so much for joining us again. We're so excited to

3
00:00:13,960 --> 00:00:15,160
Speaker 1: be bad Ray Kathy.

4
00:00:15,560 --> 00:00:18,720
Speaker 2: We are so excited. And folks, if you haven't done

5
00:00:18,720 --> 00:00:20,960
Speaker 2: it yet, I don't know. I don't know what you're doing.

6
00:00:21,320 --> 00:00:24,959
Speaker 2: But now it's the time. Follow our podcast so you

7
00:00:25,000 --> 00:00:28,000
Speaker 2: don't miss an episode. All you have to do is

8
00:00:28,040 --> 00:00:32,400
Speaker 2: search for Bachelor Happy Hour in the podcast app and

9
00:00:32,479 --> 00:00:34,120
Speaker 2: make sure to hit the follow button.

10
00:00:34,720 --> 00:00:37,559
Speaker 1: Yes, it's super important you follow the podcast so you

11
00:00:37,600 --> 00:00:41,680
Speaker 1: get notified every time there's a new episode. Also, while

12
00:00:41,680 --> 00:00:45,560
Speaker 1: you're there, leave us a review or ask us a question.

13
00:00:46,240 --> 00:00:50,000
Speaker 2: And please check out all our past episodes. Susan and

14
00:00:50,040 --> 00:00:53,120
Speaker 2: I have been having so much fun answering all of

15
00:00:53,159 --> 00:00:57,560
Speaker 2: your questions and comments, so keep them coming at Bachelornation

16
00:00:57,760 --> 00:00:59,840
Speaker 2: dot com slash Golden Hour.

17
00:01:00,440 --> 00:01:04,839
Speaker 1: And today we have a very very special guest. Our friend,

18
00:01:05,360 --> 00:01:10,640
Speaker 1: pro aging coach and Golden Bachelor fan favorite, Natasha Hardy

19
00:01:10,760 --> 00:01:11,080
Speaker 1: is here.

20
00:01:11,280 --> 00:01:14,040
Speaker 3: Hi Natasha, thanks so much for joining us.

21
00:01:14,400 --> 00:01:19,240
Speaker 4: Hi Natasha, Hi, I love it. I love what you

22
00:01:19,400 --> 00:01:23,240
Speaker 4: ladies are doing. And we are former roommates. Remember that,

23
00:01:23,840 --> 00:01:24,600
Speaker 4: Yes we are.

24
00:01:25,480 --> 00:01:27,759
Speaker 2: Yes, I remember, Natasha, you and I had to fight

25
00:01:27,800 --> 00:01:28,760
Speaker 2: for closet space.

26
00:01:29,200 --> 00:01:32,000
Speaker 3: You remember that bunk bed, Natasha, you were a good sport.

27
00:01:32,040 --> 00:01:32,760
Speaker 3: I can tell you that.

28
00:01:34,920 --> 00:01:37,039
Speaker 4: Yeah, yes, indeed, so.

29
00:01:36,959 --> 00:01:39,000
Speaker 3: Tell me about life in New York City.

30
00:01:40,319 --> 00:01:44,920
Speaker 4: Life in New York City is very exciting. I have

31
00:01:45,000 --> 00:01:50,760
Speaker 4: to say. My most recent escapade was going to pick

32
00:01:50,800 --> 00:01:56,720
Speaker 4: up my granddaughter from boarding school last weekend. And what's

33
00:01:56,800 --> 00:01:59,960
Speaker 4: so interesting. I had asked one of my ex boyfriend

34
00:02:00,040 --> 00:02:03,840
Speaker 4: and to uh drive me up to pick her up

35
00:02:03,880 --> 00:02:07,760
Speaker 4: from boarding school, and that went really well.

36
00:02:13,080 --> 00:02:13,920
Speaker 5: On this planet?

37
00:02:13,960 --> 00:02:16,720
Speaker 2: What reason did you have to call an ex boyfriend

38
00:02:16,919 --> 00:02:19,560
Speaker 2: to go pick up your granddaughter at boarding school? Because

39
00:02:19,600 --> 00:02:22,080
Speaker 2: I know she goes to go to boarding school in Massachusetts.

40
00:02:22,240 --> 00:02:23,440
Speaker 5: That's not around the corner.

41
00:02:24,520 --> 00:02:28,080
Speaker 4: No, and h to be quite honest with you, there's

42
00:02:28,120 --> 00:02:31,400
Speaker 4: a number of my ex boyfriends I keep in contact with.

43
00:02:31,520 --> 00:02:34,760
Speaker 4: I have a good relationship. We have a good friendship

44
00:02:34,919 --> 00:02:41,560
Speaker 4: right after our relationship, well situationship.

45
00:02:42,400 --> 00:02:43,080
Speaker 3: I do too.

46
00:02:43,400 --> 00:02:45,960
Speaker 4: I'm with you, and there's a couple of them that

47
00:02:46,040 --> 00:02:48,040
Speaker 4: I have really good relationships with.

48
00:02:48,520 --> 00:02:50,640
Speaker 5: Are there any that Susan and I might be interested in.

49
00:02:53,200 --> 00:02:55,280
Speaker 4: We'll tell you what someone told me. There's a reason

50
00:02:55,280 --> 00:02:59,000
Speaker 4: why they're in next That's what you're saying.

51
00:03:00,360 --> 00:03:01,080
Speaker 5: Go there.

52
00:03:01,200 --> 00:03:02,880
Speaker 3: I want to know how was the drive up, What

53
00:03:02,960 --> 00:03:04,120
Speaker 3: did you talk about?

54
00:03:05,160 --> 00:03:08,280
Speaker 5: Are you reconsidering dating him? Yeah?

55
00:03:08,440 --> 00:03:10,720
Speaker 4: I am not reconsidering dating him.

56
00:03:11,360 --> 00:03:12,880
Speaker 3: Is he reconsidering you?

57
00:03:15,760 --> 00:03:15,799
Speaker 2: That?

58
00:03:16,000 --> 00:03:21,520
Speaker 4: I don't know. That did not surface in the conversation. However,

59
00:03:21,880 --> 00:03:25,720
Speaker 4: I can say that ten years ago we broke up,

60
00:03:25,760 --> 00:03:29,040
Speaker 4: we separated, and I don't think we had closure, and

61
00:03:29,320 --> 00:03:36,000
Speaker 4: that time we spent together gave us closure in our relationship.

62
00:03:36,360 --> 00:03:39,960
Speaker 4: And even though we've been speaking and connecting over the

63
00:03:40,040 --> 00:03:43,240
Speaker 4: last ten years, I didn't realize and I don't think

64
00:03:43,360 --> 00:03:46,400
Speaker 4: he also didn't realize that we didn't have closure. We

65
00:03:46,520 --> 00:03:50,800
Speaker 4: spoke about that, we didn't really have closure, and there

66
00:03:50,920 --> 00:03:55,600
Speaker 4: was a whole thing that went on and between us

67
00:03:56,400 --> 00:04:01,680
Speaker 4: where we spoke about things and shared and really connected

68
00:04:01,880 --> 00:04:05,960
Speaker 4: in a way that allowed us to heal. And I

69
00:04:06,160 --> 00:04:11,920
Speaker 4: do honestly believe that has opened up something for me

70
00:04:12,800 --> 00:04:19,760
Speaker 4: away for me to now start dating in a full capacity.

71
00:04:19,800 --> 00:04:21,720
Speaker 5: Like wait a minute, Wait a minute, Natasha.

72
00:04:22,080 --> 00:04:24,400
Speaker 2: All this happened on an hour and a half drive

73
00:04:24,560 --> 00:04:26,840
Speaker 2: to western Massachusetts.

74
00:04:26,880 --> 00:04:27,680
Speaker 5: Give me a break.

75
00:04:27,800 --> 00:04:30,919
Speaker 4: Come on, excuse me, excuse me. Let me tell you

76
00:04:31,040 --> 00:04:35,479
Speaker 4: it's four hours away, because it's four field right, it's

77
00:04:35,600 --> 00:04:41,760
Speaker 4: way over it's beautifour hours away. And because he came

78
00:04:41,839 --> 00:04:46,159
Speaker 4: from Virginia to come here, I asked him to come

79
00:04:46,279 --> 00:04:49,719
Speaker 4: the day before we were leaving, and then we drove

80
00:04:49,920 --> 00:04:53,200
Speaker 4: up the day before Dana got out of school.

81
00:04:53,520 --> 00:04:56,120
Speaker 5: Where to spend the night before? Right?

82
00:04:56,400 --> 00:05:00,919
Speaker 4: He here? Okay, stay here. That's why we were able

83
00:05:00,960 --> 00:05:02,599
Speaker 4: to talk and connect a lot.

84
00:05:02,920 --> 00:05:04,800
Speaker 5: Right And I bet you did connect.

85
00:05:05,279 --> 00:05:12,799
Speaker 4: Yeah. Well, I'm going to use your use just saying

86
00:05:13,200 --> 00:05:14,239
Speaker 4: I don't kiss in town.

87
00:05:15,040 --> 00:05:20,880
Speaker 2: Oh interesting, So some Natasha, let me ask you something here?

88
00:05:21,800 --> 00:05:24,080
Speaker 5: I mean for me, I don't get all this for me.

89
00:05:24,200 --> 00:05:28,120
Speaker 2: You know, closure takes like thirty seconds goodbye, so you

90
00:05:28,160 --> 00:05:32,680
Speaker 2: know four hours. I don't know, like whatever. I'm glad though, seriously,

91
00:05:32,760 --> 00:05:35,279
Speaker 2: I'm happy for you that you guys had closure and

92
00:05:35,320 --> 00:05:37,400
Speaker 2: you can move on and you want to date, which

93
00:05:37,520 --> 00:05:40,919
Speaker 2: brings me to my question, what's dating like?

94
00:05:41,200 --> 00:05:43,480
Speaker 5: Are you dating? Give us the scoop?

95
00:05:45,520 --> 00:05:50,640
Speaker 4: I feel like dating in New York is challenging the men.

96
00:05:51,600 --> 00:05:56,200
Speaker 4: The female to male ratio is very high, and I

97
00:05:56,279 --> 00:06:00,400
Speaker 4: do feel like men are here in New York are

98
00:06:00,760 --> 00:06:04,479
Speaker 4: playing the field. I don't really find men who are

99
00:06:05,000 --> 00:06:12,159
Speaker 4: who seriously want to settle down. And my goal is

100
00:06:12,240 --> 00:06:15,840
Speaker 4: my next within the next two years, I plan to

101
00:06:15,960 --> 00:06:19,159
Speaker 4: leave New York and I really feel that I will

102
00:06:19,440 --> 00:06:22,600
Speaker 4: find someone outside of New York. However, I'm going to

103
00:06:22,640 --> 00:06:26,400
Speaker 4: get my dating chops and effect between now and the time.

104
00:06:26,480 --> 00:06:29,000
Speaker 5: I will tell you, Yeah, I'll tell you.

105
00:06:29,080 --> 00:06:32,640
Speaker 2: Natasha, my daughter lived and worked in New York for

106
00:06:32,800 --> 00:06:35,960
Speaker 2: several years, and she said the same thing that you know.

107
00:06:36,040 --> 00:06:39,640
Speaker 2: She's she's she dated, she had a great job, she's beautiful,

108
00:06:39,720 --> 00:06:42,080
Speaker 2: she's smart, all of that. She said she would date

109
00:06:42,600 --> 00:06:46,120
Speaker 2: a guy and then you know he'd be But what

110
00:06:46,200 --> 00:06:49,200
Speaker 2: else is out there? Like the commitment thing was a

111
00:06:49,200 --> 00:06:51,359
Speaker 2: big thing she said in New York. All right, I

112
00:06:51,360 --> 00:06:54,120
Speaker 2: have a question for you, Natasha. I know you're a

113
00:06:54,200 --> 00:06:57,000
Speaker 2: dating pro, life aging coach and all that. What's one

114
00:06:57,000 --> 00:07:00,719
Speaker 2: thing that you wish people knew about dating? As you know,

115
00:07:00,800 --> 00:07:01,599
Speaker 2: as we age.

116
00:07:03,000 --> 00:07:06,880
Speaker 4: I wish people knew how to date. The biggest thing

117
00:07:06,960 --> 00:07:10,960
Speaker 4: I'm realizing is we were never taught how to date

118
00:07:11,520 --> 00:07:15,520
Speaker 4: as young women as adult women. And when we go

119
00:07:15,640 --> 00:07:18,840
Speaker 4: back in the dating pool in this stage, we're going

120
00:07:18,920 --> 00:07:23,120
Speaker 4: back into the dating, the dating scene with those teenager

121
00:07:23,600 --> 00:07:26,760
Speaker 4: skills we had, and who the heck goes through their

122
00:07:26,840 --> 00:07:31,720
Speaker 4: life without re upping their skills as they grow. We

123
00:07:31,800 --> 00:07:34,160
Speaker 4: don't normally do that. And if you're in the marriage,

124
00:07:34,280 --> 00:07:38,200
Speaker 4: you're you're doing that, or you know, when you're separating

125
00:07:38,280 --> 00:07:41,440
Speaker 4: from your husband or your partner, and now you go

126
00:07:41,520 --> 00:07:43,800
Speaker 4: back in the pool. You don't have the skills. I

127
00:07:43,880 --> 00:07:49,960
Speaker 4: really feel like I wish we had skills and taught

128
00:07:50,000 --> 00:07:50,880
Speaker 4: how to date.

129
00:07:51,080 --> 00:07:53,280
Speaker 5: Okay, give me the one skill, give me the one

130
00:07:53,320 --> 00:07:56,200
Speaker 5: skill we need. What's the skill, Susan? And I need.

131
00:07:58,560 --> 00:08:04,559
Speaker 4: To go on chat GPT and download questions to ask

132
00:08:04,800 --> 00:08:10,480
Speaker 4: your partner and what chat GPT and find out dating questions,

133
00:08:10,520 --> 00:08:12,680
Speaker 4: which is what I did before I went on The Bachelor.

134
00:08:12,800 --> 00:08:16,280
Speaker 4: I had questions the correct questions that ask People are

135
00:08:16,320 --> 00:08:19,400
Speaker 4: asking questions that are way too deep and not asking

136
00:08:19,480 --> 00:08:23,640
Speaker 4: shot questions that are that are get to know you questions.

137
00:08:24,160 --> 00:08:24,880
Speaker 4: They have more.

138
00:08:25,760 --> 00:08:27,800
Speaker 2: You mean, I shouldn't ask the guy on the first

139
00:08:27,880 --> 00:08:30,200
Speaker 2: date how many zeros are in his bank account?

140
00:08:30,240 --> 00:08:31,040
Speaker 5: Is that going to deep?

141
00:08:31,520 --> 00:08:33,000
Speaker 4: No, that's him.

142
00:08:33,040 --> 00:08:34,440
Speaker 5: That's my problem, Susan.

143
00:08:34,920 --> 00:08:39,800
Speaker 4: You really get to ask somebody like, what's your favorite

144
00:08:39,880 --> 00:08:41,199
Speaker 4: vacation you've been on?

145
00:08:43,559 --> 00:08:46,040
Speaker 3: You know, if I've said that one?

146
00:08:46,480 --> 00:08:50,160
Speaker 5: Yeah, if you have meals, yeah, if.

147
00:08:50,080 --> 00:08:54,080
Speaker 4: You had a magic wand and you could and you

148
00:08:54,120 --> 00:08:55,400
Speaker 4: had all the time in the world and all the

149
00:08:55,400 --> 00:08:57,679
Speaker 4: money in the world, what is it that you would do?

150
00:08:58,160 --> 00:08:59,280
Speaker 3: Oh, I like that.

151
00:08:59,280 --> 00:09:03,720
Speaker 4: That's a great question. These are like the questions get

152
00:09:03,760 --> 00:09:07,480
Speaker 4: to be deep, but they get to know you, questions

153
00:09:08,559 --> 00:09:10,640
Speaker 4: to know a friend. And I don't think we do that.

154
00:09:10,679 --> 00:09:13,800
Speaker 4: We we kind of get too carried away in the process,

155
00:09:14,000 --> 00:09:18,000
Speaker 4: and that's that's where we go go wrong. Women. You know,

156
00:09:18,080 --> 00:09:20,520
Speaker 4: we kind of go in and like we already got

157
00:09:20,600 --> 00:09:30,040
Speaker 4: at the altar with the guy.

158
00:09:31,480 --> 00:09:35,199
Speaker 1: I have a question, So is it not cool when

159
00:09:35,240 --> 00:09:37,439
Speaker 1: you're getting to know someone to ask them if they

160
00:09:37,480 --> 00:09:38,880
Speaker 1: know what their love language is.

161
00:09:41,440 --> 00:09:44,000
Speaker 4: I think it's too early, maybe by a third date.

162
00:09:44,640 --> 00:09:48,280
Speaker 4: You just getting to know the person. Knowing someone, wanting

163
00:09:48,360 --> 00:09:52,200
Speaker 4: to know someone's love language takes takes time. And I

164
00:09:52,400 --> 00:09:55,320
Speaker 4: also feel that it's not a cut and dry thing.

165
00:09:55,800 --> 00:09:59,160
Speaker 4: It's not like cookie cutters. Some people could have multiple

166
00:09:59,200 --> 00:10:01,240
Speaker 4: love languages is depending on.

167
00:10:01,040 --> 00:10:02,320
Speaker 3: You're looking at it.

168
00:10:02,480 --> 00:10:05,880
Speaker 4: I can't pass that test because I'm like, all of

169
00:10:05,880 --> 00:10:08,480
Speaker 4: these things are different from me, depending on day to

170
00:10:08,600 --> 00:10:10,079
Speaker 4: time of year or whatever.

171
00:10:10,400 --> 00:10:13,200
Speaker 2: Again, for me, Susan and I we've talked about this,

172
00:10:13,200 --> 00:10:15,640
Speaker 2: this whole love language thing. I'm like, what do you

173
00:10:15,679 --> 00:10:17,000
Speaker 2: want to know my love language.

174
00:10:17,000 --> 00:10:19,160
Speaker 5: What's your like? What you want? What I want?

175
00:10:19,160 --> 00:10:22,840
Speaker 2: The whole question confuses me, but I absolute agree with you, Natasha.

176
00:10:23,040 --> 00:10:26,160
Speaker 2: You you have to just sort of get to know

177
00:10:26,320 --> 00:10:30,960
Speaker 2: somebody first, and so with that in mind, tell me

178
00:10:31,040 --> 00:10:32,240
Speaker 2: what's your ideal.

179
00:10:32,000 --> 00:10:35,600
Speaker 4: Date, my ideal date or partner?

180
00:10:36,080 --> 00:10:38,640
Speaker 5: No, like you're going on a date. What's your idea

181
00:10:38,679 --> 00:10:38,960
Speaker 5: to date?

182
00:10:39,120 --> 00:10:42,560
Speaker 1: Drinks, dinner, Netflix, chilling at home? What do you think

183
00:10:42,640 --> 00:10:43,600
Speaker 1: an activity to.

184
00:10:43,559 --> 00:10:45,800
Speaker 4: Get to if I want to get to know someone

185
00:10:46,080 --> 00:10:51,400
Speaker 4: first date, first date, coffee and maybe like a light

186
00:10:51,600 --> 00:10:55,200
Speaker 4: of brunch or something like. There's some very simple coffee

187
00:10:55,280 --> 00:10:56,880
Speaker 4: because if I don't like the person, I want to

188
00:10:56,880 --> 00:10:58,040
Speaker 4: be able to get up and go.

189
00:10:58,480 --> 00:10:59,440
Speaker 3: I agree with that.

190
00:11:00,200 --> 00:11:03,800
Speaker 4: If they're good, if I'm good with them, then we

191
00:11:03,800 --> 00:11:05,800
Speaker 4: can order a little nache.

192
00:11:05,679 --> 00:11:07,360
Speaker 3: Or something to have a little notch.

193
00:11:07,679 --> 00:11:10,320
Speaker 1: So are you looking for something different in a partner

194
00:11:10,400 --> 00:11:11,880
Speaker 1: at this stage of your life?

195
00:11:12,640 --> 00:11:16,439
Speaker 3: Then you thought you were way back when and what hell?

196
00:11:16,840 --> 00:11:20,319
Speaker 2: Yes, I'm going to take that as I'm going to

197
00:11:20,400 --> 00:11:22,840
Speaker 2: take that as affirmative. Yes, tell us, tell.

198
00:11:22,760 --> 00:11:28,840
Speaker 4: Us I am looking for someone who has the ability

199
00:11:29,000 --> 00:11:35,079
Speaker 4: to be having emotional intelligence, like a level of sensitivity

200
00:11:35,160 --> 00:11:39,920
Speaker 4: that we can relate communication is key, and I would

201
00:11:40,000 --> 00:11:43,840
Speaker 4: like to have someone who can be intimate. And I'm

202
00:11:43,840 --> 00:11:51,080
Speaker 4: talking about intimacy, not physical intimacy that's gonna come. I'm

203
00:11:51,120 --> 00:11:56,320
Speaker 4: talking about an intimacy of connection. Being able to pay

204
00:11:56,360 --> 00:11:59,360
Speaker 4: attention and notice, oh you you seem like you may

205
00:11:59,400 --> 00:12:04,079
Speaker 4: be upset or bothered or are you okay? And being

206
00:12:04,120 --> 00:12:09,199
Speaker 4: able to hug, being able to sit quietly or hold

207
00:12:09,280 --> 00:12:13,480
Speaker 4: hands or go for a walk in the park. Intimacy, connection,

208
00:12:14,640 --> 00:12:18,600
Speaker 4: eye gazing, really getting to know someone. And I feel like,

209
00:12:19,080 --> 00:12:22,880
Speaker 4: back to the love language question, when you do that,

210
00:12:23,400 --> 00:12:26,320
Speaker 4: you'll know what the person's love language is. When you

211
00:12:26,360 --> 00:12:29,240
Speaker 4: get to know someone, it won't you know. It doesn't

212
00:12:29,280 --> 00:12:32,720
Speaker 4: have to be quote unquote their love language. You'll know

213
00:12:33,000 --> 00:12:36,000
Speaker 4: and you'll get to know. And having intimacy allows a

214
00:12:36,040 --> 00:12:39,839
Speaker 4: person to feel safe, for them to drop their guard

215
00:12:40,000 --> 00:12:42,320
Speaker 4: and you to drop your guard, so that there's a

216
00:12:42,360 --> 00:12:46,600
Speaker 4: connection where you can actually be your authentic self.

217
00:12:47,360 --> 00:12:52,800
Speaker 2: And that, Susan, Susan, that's the problem for us. You,

218
00:12:52,800 --> 00:12:55,600
Speaker 2: you and I have not been our authentic self.

219
00:12:55,920 --> 00:12:59,719
Speaker 5: Yes we have, I know, I was kidding. That's that's

220
00:12:59,760 --> 00:13:01,080
Speaker 5: why we don't have anybody.

221
00:13:01,160 --> 00:13:06,040
Speaker 2: That's why because we are authentically authentically ourselves.

222
00:13:05,360 --> 00:13:07,920
Speaker 1: And I'd like to be with somebody that You're still

223
00:13:08,080 --> 00:13:09,760
Speaker 1: comfortable in silence.

224
00:13:11,200 --> 00:13:12,479
Speaker 3: You're comfortable.

225
00:13:12,880 --> 00:13:15,360
Speaker 4: You heard me say that, be silent, being able to

226
00:13:15,400 --> 00:13:21,480
Speaker 4: be quiet together is The thing is, Kathy, is you

227
00:13:21,960 --> 00:13:26,440
Speaker 4: have to understand that sometimes being your authentic self is

228
00:13:26,480 --> 00:13:29,920
Speaker 4: a form of a defense mechanism, and the way it

229
00:13:29,960 --> 00:13:34,160
Speaker 4: comes across can be very brash or abrasive to someone.

230
00:13:34,440 --> 00:13:37,600
Speaker 4: So there's a level of being your authentic self where

231
00:13:37,600 --> 00:13:43,640
Speaker 4: you're soft and receptive with its guys, reciprocity going on,

232
00:13:43,800 --> 00:13:48,040
Speaker 4: where you're giving and receiving in exchange between the person.

233
00:13:48,640 --> 00:13:56,760
Speaker 4: So sometimes being able to fall back allows and be

234
00:13:57,240 --> 00:14:00,440
Speaker 4: having space for the person to be even s else

235
00:14:01,520 --> 00:14:04,280
Speaker 4: is not really so much about you showing who you are,

236
00:14:04,400 --> 00:14:09,080
Speaker 4: but being yourself in a space of flow.

237
00:14:09,200 --> 00:14:13,480
Speaker 1: If that makes sense, and comfort right, be comfortable in

238
00:14:13,520 --> 00:14:17,600
Speaker 1: your own skin. What I've learned later in life was

239
00:14:17,760 --> 00:14:24,640
Speaker 1: to relax and listen because they tell you see and

240
00:14:24,800 --> 00:14:26,680
Speaker 1: sometimes when you're nervous you go.

241
00:14:28,440 --> 00:14:29,560
Speaker 3: And I'm not.

242
00:14:30,080 --> 00:14:33,760
Speaker 1: I don't have to do that anymore now, It's just like, Okay,

243
00:14:33,880 --> 00:14:34,800
Speaker 1: show me who you are.

244
00:14:35,480 --> 00:14:38,840
Speaker 4: Men are problem solvers, so men like to solve problems.

245
00:14:39,960 --> 00:14:43,760
Speaker 4: The key thing is, like you said, Susan, is to

246
00:14:43,840 --> 00:14:47,280
Speaker 4: be a listener. Be a listener. Listening is a skill.

247
00:14:48,080 --> 00:14:48,680
Speaker 5: It is a skill.

248
00:14:48,760 --> 00:14:50,800
Speaker 2: And you know, Natasha, I make a lot of jokes,

249
00:14:50,800 --> 00:14:53,040
Speaker 2: but seriously, on the dates that I have, I am

250
00:14:53,320 --> 00:14:57,880
Speaker 2: very good at asking the questions and listening, and that's

251
00:14:57,880 --> 00:15:01,160
Speaker 2: how I find out pretty down quickly whether I'm interested

252
00:15:01,240 --> 00:15:04,000
Speaker 2: or not. I think it's we talk all the time

253
00:15:04,000 --> 00:15:07,640
Speaker 2: about red flags. If you go out with someone and

254
00:15:07,680 --> 00:15:11,120
Speaker 2: they're not asking you questions and you're not having an

255
00:15:11,200 --> 00:15:15,320
Speaker 2: equal conversation, that is a red flag. That is never

256
00:15:15,360 --> 00:15:17,880
Speaker 2: going to become a white flag. So you know, may

257
00:15:17,880 --> 00:15:20,400
Speaker 2: I make a lot of jokes, but I absolutely know that.

258
00:15:20,560 --> 00:15:22,240
Speaker 1: And you give them the benefit of the doubt for

259
00:15:22,280 --> 00:15:24,560
Speaker 1: the first few minutes because people are nervous.

260
00:15:24,880 --> 00:15:27,040
Speaker 5: Do you say first few minutes or first few dates?

261
00:15:27,200 --> 00:15:30,880
Speaker 5: No minutes sinceans in a hurry, that's it.

262
00:15:31,880 --> 00:15:35,440
Speaker 4: No, I definitely agree with what you're saying. Both of

263
00:15:35,480 --> 00:15:39,920
Speaker 4: you are saying the key thing here is to find

264
00:15:39,920 --> 00:15:42,600
Speaker 4: a happy medium, and of course if no one is

265
00:15:42,640 --> 00:15:46,680
Speaker 4: someone is not talking or communicating, you know, that's a

266
00:15:46,760 --> 00:15:51,080
Speaker 4: red flag. I agree wholeheartedly with that. I feel like

267
00:15:51,880 --> 00:15:54,880
Speaker 4: a game. I feel like at this stage of the game.

268
00:15:55,120 --> 00:15:58,760
Speaker 4: Your assessment can be so quick because we've lived long

269
00:15:58,880 --> 00:16:03,280
Speaker 4: enough to you know, snuff out the nonsense. So that

270
00:16:03,360 --> 00:16:05,680
Speaker 4: makes it easier. You don't have to waste your time

271
00:16:06,320 --> 00:16:08,400
Speaker 4: with a knuckle dragger, you know what I mean?

272
00:16:09,080 --> 00:16:12,280
Speaker 1: Have you met anyone that has these things that you're

273
00:16:12,280 --> 00:16:15,080
Speaker 1: looking for or some of them, some of the qualities

274
00:16:15,120 --> 00:16:15,640
Speaker 1: that you like?

275
00:16:17,640 --> 00:16:18,440
Speaker 4: Not yet?

276
00:16:18,680 --> 00:16:18,840
Speaker 5: Not?

277
00:16:18,880 --> 00:16:21,160
Speaker 2: All right, Well she hasn't. But well, I want to

278
00:16:21,200 --> 00:16:23,600
Speaker 2: talk about Joan for a minute. We know she's going

279
00:16:23,640 --> 00:16:26,400
Speaker 2: to be the Golden Bachelorette.

280
00:16:25,520 --> 00:16:26,840
Speaker 3: And we're all excited.

281
00:16:26,880 --> 00:16:31,040
Speaker 2: We're so excited, So come on, tell us what do

282
00:16:31,080 --> 00:16:33,080
Speaker 2: you think about her being the Golden Bachelor.

283
00:16:32,760 --> 00:16:39,440
Speaker 4: At I think it's awesome. I love Joan. She first

284
00:16:39,440 --> 00:16:43,760
Speaker 4: of all, she's very beautiful woman. We all are, and

285
00:16:43,800 --> 00:16:48,600
Speaker 4: she's a beautiful woman who does not allow her beauty

286
00:16:48,840 --> 00:16:53,640
Speaker 4: to impact who she is. And I feel like a

287
00:16:53,720 --> 00:16:56,280
Speaker 4: lot most of us in the house were like that.

288
00:16:56,320 --> 00:17:00,640
Speaker 4: We did not allow our gifts to ope with shadow

289
00:17:01,120 --> 00:17:03,760
Speaker 4: who we were. And I feel like joon o'll be

290
00:17:04,200 --> 00:17:08,760
Speaker 4: is very even killed and she has her her brain

291
00:17:08,960 --> 00:17:15,920
Speaker 4: is you know good, She'll make her assessments is spot on.

292
00:17:16,880 --> 00:17:21,919
Speaker 4: She's a lot of fun and I feel like Joan

293
00:17:22,520 --> 00:17:26,840
Speaker 4: has great discernment in this process. I wish her all

294
00:17:26,880 --> 00:17:29,639
Speaker 4: the best. I know she's going to do, be excellent

295
00:17:29,720 --> 00:17:33,760
Speaker 4: in the role, and I don't Joan has three.

296
00:17:33,680 --> 00:17:35,680
Speaker 5: Children, I believe four.

297
00:17:36,040 --> 00:17:39,359
Speaker 4: I think she has four, four children and grandchildren, so

298
00:17:39,400 --> 00:17:41,520
Speaker 4: she's not going to be up for the Shenanigans.

299
00:17:43,200 --> 00:17:46,960
Speaker 1: Do you have any advice for the bachelors that are

300
00:17:47,040 --> 00:17:48,359
Speaker 1: going on her show?

301
00:17:48,520 --> 00:17:51,520
Speaker 3: What would you tell them if they asked you for advice?

302
00:17:52,160 --> 00:17:58,880
Speaker 4: I would tell them to be their authentic self, to

303
00:17:59,200 --> 00:18:03,880
Speaker 4: take their time. I'm in how they present to her,

304
00:18:05,240 --> 00:18:11,440
Speaker 4: be honest, right, and they get to do a little

305
00:18:11,480 --> 00:18:14,600
Speaker 4: research and find out what is it that she's looking for.

306
00:18:14,680 --> 00:18:17,560
Speaker 4: I'm sure it's out there. We we you know, all

307
00:18:17,600 --> 00:18:21,040
Speaker 4: our information is out there. So they get to do research,

308
00:18:21,200 --> 00:18:24,400
Speaker 4: figure out what she wants. And don't don't come half

309
00:18:24,440 --> 00:18:27,480
Speaker 4: step in because that's our sister and we we will

310
00:18:27,520 --> 00:18:32,080
Speaker 4: come if you try to play a trick on her,

311
00:18:32,200 --> 00:18:33,320
Speaker 4: laugh a little bit.

312
00:18:33,160 --> 00:18:35,760
Speaker 5: To make her laugh and and have a good time.

313
00:18:35,680 --> 00:18:37,560
Speaker 3: Exactly all right.

314
00:18:37,640 --> 00:18:39,120
Speaker 5: So wait, I have a question, Natasha.

315
00:18:39,600 --> 00:18:43,320
Speaker 2: Everyone, your your ear rings, your your comments on chairs

316
00:18:43,480 --> 00:18:46,480
Speaker 2: is is infamous. It goes down in history and the

317
00:18:46,560 --> 00:18:48,600
Speaker 2: earring Yo, she's got on her chair earrings.

318
00:18:48,600 --> 00:18:50,200
Speaker 5: Look at that all right?

319
00:18:50,680 --> 00:18:54,680
Speaker 2: Other than chairs at the rows ceremonies, Are there any

320
00:18:54,720 --> 00:18:58,879
Speaker 2: other accommodations for these for this season that you'd like

321
00:18:59,000 --> 00:19:02,119
Speaker 2: to see the upcoming Golden Bachelorette?

322
00:19:04,520 --> 00:19:09,640
Speaker 4: Uh? I don't know. If men would need chairs, definitely

323
00:19:09,920 --> 00:19:13,520
Speaker 4: no women would need chairs. And I would actually request

324
00:19:13,560 --> 00:19:15,760
Speaker 4: that Jones sits in a chair while she.

325
00:19:19,640 --> 00:19:21,960
Speaker 3: Cushion those wooden things that you stand.

326
00:19:23,160 --> 00:19:28,000
Speaker 4: Yeah. I would tell these guys to to really just

327
00:19:28,000 --> 00:19:32,040
Speaker 4: just be friends. I mean I think that that is so.

328
00:19:33,280 --> 00:19:35,800
Speaker 4: I know it's competitive, and men are way more competitive

329
00:19:35,840 --> 00:19:41,240
Speaker 4: than women. I feel like as a coach they definitely

330
00:19:41,760 --> 00:19:45,400
Speaker 4: we have been given advice forever. And of course that

331
00:19:45,440 --> 00:19:46,360
Speaker 4: goes without.

332
00:19:46,040 --> 00:19:50,960
Speaker 1: Saying so, let's let's go back to people midlife Golden

333
00:19:51,800 --> 00:19:55,080
Speaker 1: who feel discouraged in the dating scene, like some people

334
00:19:55,080 --> 00:19:58,160
Speaker 1: aren't comfortable with dating apps, and how do you feel

335
00:19:58,160 --> 00:19:58,640
Speaker 1: about that?

336
00:19:58,800 --> 00:20:01,720
Speaker 4: Or then I talked about that a couple of weeks

337
00:20:01,760 --> 00:20:04,680
Speaker 4: ago on a show. I would basically say to them,

338
00:20:04,760 --> 00:20:07,160
Speaker 4: don't give up. You still have a lot of life

339
00:20:07,160 --> 00:20:10,159
Speaker 4: to live. You got to kiss a lot of frogs

340
00:20:10,240 --> 00:20:14,399
Speaker 4: before you get your prints, and you know, in our life,

341
00:20:14,880 --> 00:20:19,119
Speaker 4: right in our life. We go on, we try, try

342
00:20:19,240 --> 00:20:25,440
Speaker 4: and try again and that one time or twice that happened.

343
00:20:26,840 --> 00:20:30,680
Speaker 4: Find a way. If dating apps don't work for you,

344
00:20:31,080 --> 00:20:35,080
Speaker 4: then find like find a way to interact. There's so

345
00:20:35,160 --> 00:20:39,440
Speaker 4: many ways. You can learn a language, start a new hobby,

346
00:20:40,680 --> 00:20:43,720
Speaker 4: you can take a class, all these places you'll meet

347
00:20:43,920 --> 00:20:48,440
Speaker 4: people in your effic to start dating. It doesn't matter

348
00:20:48,640 --> 00:20:52,240
Speaker 4: me dating or oriented. It could be you're putting yourself

349
00:20:52,280 --> 00:20:56,280
Speaker 4: in different environments or joint organizations where you get a

350
00:20:56,400 --> 00:21:01,119
Speaker 4: chance to meet people, even organizations from your your past

351
00:21:01,400 --> 00:21:06,920
Speaker 4: working experience or careers. Right Heep added, I know it's discouraging,

352
00:21:07,280 --> 00:21:10,280
Speaker 4: and it's okay. We get discouraged a lot, but it

353
00:21:10,320 --> 00:21:12,760
Speaker 4: doesn't mean we get to sit down and stop living.

354
00:21:13,320 --> 00:21:13,640
Speaker 4: You know.

355
00:21:23,480 --> 00:21:25,520
Speaker 3: What about the self love?

356
00:21:25,640 --> 00:21:29,119
Speaker 1: That how everybody starts seeing the image that they don't

357
00:21:29,119 --> 00:21:32,240
Speaker 1: want to see in their older years, golden years. Their

358
00:21:32,280 --> 00:21:37,040
Speaker 1: bodies change, their lives change, their work changes, or they're

359
00:21:37,119 --> 00:21:40,120
Speaker 1: retired and they don't go out like have.

360
00:21:40,160 --> 00:21:45,040
Speaker 4: You been on my Instagram page? Well, you know this

361
00:21:45,200 --> 00:21:48,679
Speaker 4: is part of here's what I have to say, and

362
00:21:48,720 --> 00:21:51,560
Speaker 4: I'll say it very quickly. This is a long, big topic.

363
00:21:52,720 --> 00:21:57,840
Speaker 4: I feel that from birth to about thirty nine. We're taught,

364
00:21:57,960 --> 00:22:00,760
Speaker 4: and we understand that there's a lot of losses and

365
00:22:01,440 --> 00:22:06,320
Speaker 4: grieving through that part, right We grieve toddlerhood to childhood,

366
00:22:06,400 --> 00:22:10,639
Speaker 4: to teens, to twins, to adulthood. We know about pregnancy,

367
00:22:10,720 --> 00:22:12,720
Speaker 4: we know about marriage, we know about all of that.

368
00:22:12,880 --> 00:22:16,680
Speaker 4: Nobody tells us about what's happening after you hit forty.

369
00:22:17,119 --> 00:22:20,159
Speaker 4: And because a lot of us don't understand or know

370
00:22:20,400 --> 00:22:30,880
Speaker 4: about menopause, peri menopause, empty nesting, possibly divorced, career changes, parenting, caretaking,

371
00:22:30,960 --> 00:22:33,040
Speaker 4: all that stuff, no one talks about it. So we

372
00:22:33,080 --> 00:22:41,000
Speaker 4: can depress to this, you really, because the reality is

373
00:22:41,000 --> 00:22:43,760
Speaker 4: is that this is what happens. And if we were

374
00:22:44,320 --> 00:22:47,320
Speaker 4: educated about it, we would know that we're not going

375
00:22:47,400 --> 00:22:50,240
Speaker 4: to keep that slim, trim body and it's okay to

376
00:22:50,280 --> 00:22:53,480
Speaker 4: get a little belly or gain some weight and get

377
00:22:53,560 --> 00:22:57,119
Speaker 4: used to seeing the hair. You're going to have these changes.

378
00:22:57,640 --> 00:23:00,000
Speaker 4: And imagine if you got pregnant and didn't know your

379
00:23:00,040 --> 00:23:02,600
Speaker 4: belly was gonna get big, how that would freak you out?

380
00:23:02,800 --> 00:23:05,200
Speaker 4: If you educated to know your head is gonna get grid,

381
00:23:05,240 --> 00:23:07,399
Speaker 4: you're gonna get this belly, You're gonna have these things.

382
00:23:07,600 --> 00:23:08,600
Speaker 4: It's okay.

383
00:23:08,800 --> 00:23:12,080
Speaker 3: You know, how do we tell them to love themselves? Again?

384
00:23:12,200 --> 00:23:16,080
Speaker 3: I mean exactly, it's acceptance.

385
00:23:16,600 --> 00:23:21,199
Speaker 4: Acceptance comes in increments, right, So you must accept a

386
00:23:21,240 --> 00:23:24,119
Speaker 4: little at a time, a little at the time.

387
00:23:24,680 --> 00:23:26,120
Speaker 5: But don't know, Tasha, don't you think?

388
00:23:26,200 --> 00:23:32,320
Speaker 2: Also sort of as we age, building uh self love

389
00:23:32,440 --> 00:23:35,679
Speaker 2: means building some and changing some of our habits to

390
00:23:35,800 --> 00:23:40,200
Speaker 2: adapt to how we are aging. So it's maybe, as

391
00:23:40,240 --> 00:23:42,400
Speaker 2: you say, maybe you have to move a little more,

392
00:23:42,560 --> 00:23:44,760
Speaker 2: or you have to change what you eat, and it's

393
00:23:44,840 --> 00:23:48,159
Speaker 2: you know, pasapasa, step by step. You gotta you can't

394
00:23:48,200 --> 00:23:51,280
Speaker 2: make a million changes at one time, but a little

395
00:23:51,400 --> 00:23:53,320
Speaker 2: change can have a dramatic effect.

396
00:23:53,960 --> 00:23:57,879
Speaker 4: Absolutely, And that's the acceptance part. It's like, oh, I

397
00:23:58,200 --> 00:24:02,199
Speaker 4: noticed I'm putting on some Let me start exercises, or

398
00:24:02,400 --> 00:24:04,640
Speaker 4: let me change my diet, or let me go meet

399
00:24:04,680 --> 00:24:09,880
Speaker 4: with a nutritionist. These small steps of accepting, and you're

400
00:24:10,040 --> 00:24:16,159
Speaker 4: loving yourself in the process. And it happens like you

401
00:24:16,280 --> 00:24:19,520
Speaker 4: start saying, I get like I'm tired of taking care

402
00:24:19,560 --> 00:24:22,880
Speaker 4: of everybody else. We as women, mothers, do that it's

403
00:24:22,880 --> 00:24:25,840
Speaker 4: time to turn the focus on me. What is it

404
00:24:25,880 --> 00:24:29,040
Speaker 4: that I get to do to love myself? Maybe I

405
00:24:29,080 --> 00:24:32,400
Speaker 4: need to make regular doctor's appointments, go to the dentist,

406
00:24:32,880 --> 00:24:36,639
Speaker 4: do a facial once a month, Start exercising, change my

407
00:24:36,720 --> 00:24:39,679
Speaker 4: eating and it takes excise.

408
00:24:41,880 --> 00:24:45,000
Speaker 5: How many times did I tell you? Yeah, finally started exercising.

409
00:24:45,680 --> 00:24:48,960
Speaker 1: However, I can't change the way I eat yet.

410
00:24:49,400 --> 00:24:50,120
Speaker 4: That's fine.

411
00:24:50,320 --> 00:24:54,240
Speaker 2: That's one step, dude. It's one step at a time,

412
00:24:54,359 --> 00:24:56,720
Speaker 2: and you get changed. Susan, you gave up champs, so

413
00:24:56,960 --> 00:25:00,359
Speaker 2: I did good on you. Yes, all right, Well, Tasha,

414
00:25:00,440 --> 00:25:03,600
Speaker 2: I'm a little afraid to ask us, but we're gonna

415
00:25:03,880 --> 00:25:06,920
Speaker 2: close out this part of our lovely time with you.

416
00:25:08,960 --> 00:25:10,360
Speaker 5: Okay, natashauld be kind.

417
00:25:10,440 --> 00:25:12,760
Speaker 2: You know I come across as brash, but really I

418
00:25:12,760 --> 00:25:14,880
Speaker 2: can break down in tears at a moment to notice.

419
00:25:15,280 --> 00:25:18,399
Speaker 2: What's your dating advice for us? Don't hold back? Come on,

420
00:25:18,560 --> 00:25:19,080
Speaker 2: what is it?

421
00:25:19,359 --> 00:25:21,600
Speaker 5: Give it? Harry?

422
00:25:21,640 --> 00:25:26,919
Speaker 4: I say, you both have a great sense of humor.

423
00:25:27,640 --> 00:25:32,520
Speaker 4: Keep that up. I would say to take your time,

424
00:25:33,600 --> 00:25:39,320
Speaker 4: hold back, fall back and really go on chat ep

425
00:25:39,560 --> 00:25:44,359
Speaker 4: and find out ten questions that you can ask that

426
00:25:44,440 --> 00:25:47,400
Speaker 4: will support you in dating to get to know someone,

427
00:25:48,080 --> 00:25:52,840
Speaker 4: and that will allow you to put that question out

428
00:25:52,880 --> 00:25:56,280
Speaker 4: there and then get the flood of information you get

429
00:25:56,359 --> 00:26:00,199
Speaker 4: to have so that you can make a choice you

430
00:26:00,280 --> 00:26:03,600
Speaker 4: both are very loving and kind women. I know. I

431
00:26:03,640 --> 00:26:05,840
Speaker 4: was in a room with you all and you have

432
00:26:06,040 --> 00:26:10,280
Speaker 4: both have big hearts, and you have a big you have.

433
00:26:10,840 --> 00:26:15,040
Speaker 1: A big big man, comedy, big comedy, big fun.

434
00:26:15,240 --> 00:26:18,119
Speaker 4: You both love to have fun, and I think you

435
00:26:18,200 --> 00:26:22,119
Speaker 4: have everything you need. We get to have men, I say, we,

436
00:26:22,359 --> 00:26:25,920
Speaker 4: including me, who are not intimidated by women who are

437
00:26:25,960 --> 00:26:27,960
Speaker 4: so self assured as we are.

438
00:26:28,400 --> 00:26:30,679
Speaker 1: And you know, they always say they want a woman

439
00:26:30,760 --> 00:26:34,560
Speaker 1: that's self sufficient, that's self you know, and they really don't.

440
00:26:34,600 --> 00:26:38,200
Speaker 4: I don't think I don't think they know what that means.

441
00:26:38,000 --> 00:26:40,639
Speaker 3: When you're a strong, independent woman.

442
00:26:40,760 --> 00:26:44,359
Speaker 1: Men. So I want an independent woman, and we are independent.

443
00:26:44,440 --> 00:26:47,000
Speaker 1: We take care of ourselves. We're doing our own lives

444
00:26:47,480 --> 00:26:49,280
Speaker 1: and we want to share it with someone.

445
00:26:49,600 --> 00:26:52,120
Speaker 3: And that's intimidating to a lot of men.

446
00:26:53,400 --> 00:26:55,000
Speaker 5: We just got to find the ones that's not.

447
00:26:55,240 --> 00:26:58,080
Speaker 4: At the same time, we've been doing this so long.

448
00:26:58,200 --> 00:27:01,720
Speaker 4: We it's not only them. We have to learn to

449
00:27:02,080 --> 00:27:05,919
Speaker 4: fall back. We have to learn to have some allowing

450
00:27:06,080 --> 00:27:08,720
Speaker 4: in the process. We have to learn not to be

451
00:27:08,800 --> 00:27:12,439
Speaker 4: so stuck in our ways where we begin to allow

452
00:27:12,520 --> 00:27:14,719
Speaker 4: them to be who they are and not want them

453
00:27:14,760 --> 00:27:18,480
Speaker 4: to conform to our way. This way.

454
00:27:19,720 --> 00:27:20,960
Speaker 3: That was my problem.

455
00:27:21,000 --> 00:27:23,800
Speaker 1: I would conform to all their ways, and then six

456
00:27:23,840 --> 00:27:24,320
Speaker 1: months in.

457
00:27:24,320 --> 00:27:27,600
Speaker 4: I'm like, communication is key, that's.

458
00:27:28,119 --> 00:27:29,120
Speaker 3: That's our middle word.

459
00:27:29,280 --> 00:27:30,720
Speaker 5: Yes, yeah, yeah.

460
00:27:30,760 --> 00:27:33,680
Speaker 1: So we have a question from one of our fans

461
00:27:33,840 --> 00:27:37,159
Speaker 1: and they'd like some advice with all of us. And

462
00:27:37,320 --> 00:27:41,680
Speaker 1: this one is from Saphina. She's seventy one and she's

463
00:27:41,720 --> 00:27:46,080
Speaker 1: from Atlanta. I love the Golden Hour podcast.

464
00:27:46,359 --> 00:27:46,840
Speaker 3: Thank you.

465
00:27:47,400 --> 00:27:50,679
Speaker 1: Finally a podcast from some people I can relate to.

466
00:27:51,560 --> 00:27:54,280
Speaker 1: I thought i'd write in because I've been struggling with

467
00:27:54,359 --> 00:27:57,959
Speaker 1: my self confidence lately and it's holding me back from dating.

468
00:27:58,520 --> 00:28:01,639
Speaker 1: When I see pictures of my from twenties, thirties, forties,

469
00:28:01,720 --> 00:28:04,680
Speaker 1: I look so beautiful when I look in the mirror. Now,

470
00:28:05,280 --> 00:28:08,080
Speaker 1: I fear my best days are behind me, and it's

471
00:28:08,119 --> 00:28:11,520
Speaker 1: been holding me back from putting myself out there. I

472
00:28:11,720 --> 00:28:14,720
Speaker 1: never imagine being single at this age, and I wish

473
00:28:14,800 --> 00:28:18,560
Speaker 1: the younger version of me could be what my potential

474
00:28:18,640 --> 00:28:22,199
Speaker 1: suitors were seeing. I really want to meet someone, but

475
00:28:22,320 --> 00:28:24,879
Speaker 1: all the men my age and older are dating much

476
00:28:25,160 --> 00:28:29,200
Speaker 1: younger women, and I'm beginning to feel discouraged. Would love

477
00:28:29,240 --> 00:28:31,800
Speaker 1: to hear your thoughts on this and if you have

478
00:28:31,960 --> 00:28:36,119
Speaker 1: any advice for me. Love you ladies all, Sephina, and

479
00:28:36,200 --> 00:28:38,280
Speaker 1: thanks for writing in. And you know what, we all

480
00:28:38,320 --> 00:28:40,880
Speaker 1: look back at our pictures. I was hot once upon

481
00:28:40,920 --> 00:28:41,320
Speaker 1: a time.

482
00:28:42,360 --> 00:28:44,280
Speaker 2: What do you think, Natasha? Come on, what do you

483
00:28:44,280 --> 00:28:46,560
Speaker 2: think for Safina? Give some gold here.

484
00:28:47,240 --> 00:28:51,360
Speaker 4: Confidence has nothing to do with your with what you

485
00:28:51,480 --> 00:28:55,520
Speaker 4: look like or what you wear. Confidence is an inside job,

486
00:28:55,680 --> 00:28:59,640
Speaker 4: like happiness, like love, like joy. And she gets to

487
00:29:00,000 --> 00:29:05,480
Speaker 4: look at who she's become over these years and she

488
00:29:05,720 --> 00:29:10,600
Speaker 4: still is that young version of herself and bring that forward,

489
00:29:10,640 --> 00:29:14,640
Speaker 4: bring the youthful energy of who she is to the

490
00:29:14,720 --> 00:29:19,120
Speaker 4: foreground and live in that space and stop worrying about

491
00:29:19,480 --> 00:29:23,560
Speaker 4: what people think and worrying about who's.

492
00:29:26,560 --> 00:29:28,800
Speaker 5: Yeah, you know it's funny, so beautiful.

493
00:29:28,960 --> 00:29:33,240
Speaker 4: She's still beautiful spring herself and comparison will kill you.

494
00:29:33,600 --> 00:29:35,400
Speaker 5: Yeah, because you know what I have done.

495
00:29:35,720 --> 00:29:39,800
Speaker 2: I'm sitting here looking at this and thinking, Sephena, you

496
00:29:39,840 --> 00:29:45,280
Speaker 2: have matured you. I don't want to be my younger self.

497
00:29:45,760 --> 00:29:49,840
Speaker 2: I have gained so much knowledge and experience and have

498
00:29:50,280 --> 00:29:52,800
Speaker 2: had the highest of highs. I've had the best love,

499
00:29:52,880 --> 00:29:56,160
Speaker 2: I've suffered the greatest losses. All of those things have

500
00:29:56,280 --> 00:29:59,640
Speaker 2: made me who I am today. That's who I want

501
00:29:59,680 --> 00:30:02,760
Speaker 2: someone to fall in love with, not some picture of

502
00:30:02,840 --> 00:30:06,480
Speaker 2: me when you know I was twenty or twenty five. So, Sophia,

503
00:30:06,560 --> 00:30:10,600
Speaker 2: I think you need to rethink what it is you're

504
00:30:10,680 --> 00:30:13,720
Speaker 2: looking for and what you think men are looking for,

505
00:30:14,040 --> 00:30:15,200
Speaker 2: because you don't want a guy.

506
00:30:15,720 --> 00:30:17,320
Speaker 5: You don't want a guy that's looking for a twenty

507
00:30:17,400 --> 00:30:17,960
Speaker 5: year old.

508
00:30:18,160 --> 00:30:21,440
Speaker 1: Sephina, there's one thing you said that I'm going to

509
00:30:21,600 --> 00:30:25,840
Speaker 1: disagree with. Your best days are behind you? Oh no

510
00:30:26,080 --> 00:30:30,480
Speaker 1: they're not, Sweetie. This is the best chapter ever. Go out,

511
00:30:30,680 --> 00:30:34,600
Speaker 1: be you, be you, enjoy you, and someone else will too.

512
00:30:36,680 --> 00:30:38,640
Speaker 5: Natasha, do you think it takes a lot of courage.

513
00:30:38,720 --> 00:30:39,680
Speaker 5: I mean, that's the thing.

514
00:30:39,720 --> 00:30:42,760
Speaker 2: I think people our age sometimes they think we think

515
00:30:42,800 --> 00:30:45,600
Speaker 2: we're the only ones dealing with this. And I think

516
00:30:45,880 --> 00:30:48,640
Speaker 2: you know, when you were talking earlier about going out

517
00:30:49,000 --> 00:30:52,480
Speaker 2: and going to, you know, different venues to meet people,

518
00:30:52,720 --> 00:30:55,440
Speaker 2: I think we all need to remember right that we're

519
00:30:55,480 --> 00:30:58,160
Speaker 2: all scared. We're all in that same boat. So it's

520
00:30:58,320 --> 00:31:02,360
Speaker 2: just being you. And do you agree with that or not?

521
00:31:02,840 --> 00:31:05,720
Speaker 4: I agree practice makes perfect. The more you go out,

522
00:31:05,840 --> 00:31:09,640
Speaker 4: the more you get to know people and go into

523
00:31:09,800 --> 00:31:12,920
Speaker 4: different venues for dating or getting to know people, it

524
00:31:12,960 --> 00:31:16,360
Speaker 4: becomes easier. It's when you rarely do it, and you

525
00:31:16,600 --> 00:31:18,440
Speaker 4: it's you don't.

526
00:31:18,640 --> 00:31:19,360
Speaker 5: It's the word.

527
00:31:19,480 --> 00:31:23,800
Speaker 4: Yeah, it's weird, it's awkward. You're socially awkward. And I

528
00:31:23,880 --> 00:31:26,400
Speaker 4: know it's taken me years to be able to step

529
00:31:26,440 --> 00:31:31,520
Speaker 4: into new environments confidently. However, you must do it. I

530
00:31:31,640 --> 00:31:34,480
Speaker 4: notice the more I go out, the more I'm circulating,

531
00:31:34,800 --> 00:31:37,120
Speaker 4: the easier it comes.

532
00:31:36,960 --> 00:31:40,240
Speaker 1: Or temper the troul about yourself. Take a little trip

533
00:31:40,280 --> 00:31:42,480
Speaker 1: by yourself. It doesn't have to be long, it doesn't

534
00:31:42,520 --> 00:31:45,440
Speaker 1: even have to be far. Just go be with yourself.

535
00:31:45,440 --> 00:31:49,880
Speaker 1: You never know who you're going to meet, and that's okay.

536
00:31:50,000 --> 00:31:52,000
Speaker 1: If you didn't meet anybody you did you.

537
00:31:52,680 --> 00:31:55,200
Speaker 4: Sit right down and see what is she want? Like,

538
00:31:55,280 --> 00:31:57,280
Speaker 4: sit down and write on the paper. She may not

539
00:31:57,320 --> 00:32:00,120
Speaker 4: even know who she's looking for because she hasn't even

540
00:32:00,160 --> 00:32:03,360
Speaker 4: evaluated what am I looking for? The question you all

541
00:32:03,400 --> 00:32:05,240
Speaker 4: ask me what am I looking for in a partner?

542
00:32:05,320 --> 00:32:08,240
Speaker 4: Right now? What are the what are my pros? And

543
00:32:08,280 --> 00:32:10,120
Speaker 4: what are my cons? And if you have a long

544
00:32:10,200 --> 00:32:15,240
Speaker 4: list of negatives and not enough positive you got you

545
00:32:15,360 --> 00:32:16,400
Speaker 4: got a lot of work to do.

546
00:32:17,640 --> 00:32:21,720
Speaker 1: Natasha, you are absolutely fabulous and you're spot on. Thank

547
00:32:21,760 --> 00:32:24,720
Speaker 1: you so much for coming and talking with us today

548
00:32:24,840 --> 00:32:28,400
Speaker 1: and just sit out some great advice ladies and gentlemen.

549
00:32:28,440 --> 00:32:32,440
Speaker 1: That does it for today's episode of Bachelor Happy Hours

550
00:32:32,480 --> 00:32:33,200
Speaker 1: Golden Hour.

551
00:32:33,320 --> 00:32:35,840
Speaker 3: Thank you so much, Natasha.

552
00:32:36,160 --> 00:32:38,160
Speaker 5: We have loved catching up with you. Natasha.

553
00:32:38,200 --> 00:32:42,160
Speaker 2: As always, you always have great advice and we hope

554
00:32:42,160 --> 00:32:45,360
Speaker 2: that you all will follow us on Bachelor Bachelor Happy

555
00:32:45,400 --> 00:32:48,560
Speaker 2: Hour as we have new episodes coming out every week.

556
00:32:48,760 --> 00:32:52,000
Speaker 2: If you enjoyed today with Natasha, you're gonna love what's

557
00:32:52,040 --> 00:32:52,680
Speaker 2: coming up.

558
00:32:52,560 --> 00:32:56,520
Speaker 1: Next, and make sure to submit those questions because we

559
00:32:56,760 --> 00:32:59,400
Speaker 1: do want to answer them. You can go to Bachelor

560
00:32:59,680 --> 00:33:03,360
Speaker 1: niche dot com, slash Golden Hour, or hit us up

561
00:33:03,400 --> 00:33:05,800
Speaker 1: on social at Bachelor Happy Hour.

562
00:33:05,960 --> 00:33:09,680
Speaker 2: Thanks again, and be sure listen to Bachelor Happy Hours

563
00:33:09,760 --> 00:33:13,680
Speaker 2: Golden Hour on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you listen

564
00:33:13,720 --> 00:33:14,640
Speaker 2: to podcasts.

565
00:33:14,920 --> 00:33:17,080
Speaker 5: We'll see you next week. Take care,