Speaker 1: Welcome back Barbie Adler from Selective Search. She is a
Speaker 1: matchmaker and dating expert. So we are going to get
Speaker 1: all the free information.
Speaker 2: And not have to pay several hundred thousand dollars.
Speaker 1: Okay, hello, Hello, Hello, So you brought up something amazing,
Speaker 1: which is so let's say you have oral sex with someone,
Speaker 1: or you have actual intercourse with someone, or your top
Speaker 1: is off or whatever your version is of something that
Speaker 1: you may not want to do again, or maybe that
Speaker 1: night you were lightheaded, you were topped off, you drank
Speaker 1: too much. How do you reset it? I know it's
Speaker 1: your body, but how do you have like those types
Speaker 1: of conversations with someone you don't know that well? So
Speaker 1: now you're having like a deep conversation about like what
Speaker 1: I want and I really don't usually do that in this.
Speaker 2: So what are you saying?
Speaker 3: I think that's part of the whole like conundrum, is
Speaker 3: you're somewhat setting a pattern. It doesn't have to be
Speaker 3: you don't want to have this deep conversation because that
Speaker 3: might not be appropriate either. So I think the biggest
Speaker 3: thing is there's nothing wrong with keeping it a little light,
Speaker 3: whether you're using humor or you're just being a straight
Speaker 3: shooter the next time you're with that person by being
Speaker 3: like I love that we did that, but I also
Speaker 3: want to just really get to know you and not
Speaker 3: have to be where there's expectations, and but don't use
Speaker 3: sex as a weapon where then you're making like it's
Speaker 3: just it's part of the mind playing scenario, because that
Speaker 3: is going to work against you as well. I think
Speaker 3: the biggest thing is just lead with your confidence. If
Speaker 3: you have to vent or seem insecure and be vulnerable,
Speaker 3: talk to your closest friends about that.
Speaker 4: And there's a time and.
Speaker 3: Place where you might want to talk to that person
Speaker 3: about it, but in person, not via text, not via phone.
Speaker 3: It's like a playful conversation like hey, that was really fun.
Speaker 3: But if you can't handle the unknowns afterwards, then it's
Speaker 3: not worth it.
Speaker 1: I think a person's a lot to say I need
Speaker 1: to my emotions need to catch up to where my
Speaker 1: body is one hundred percent.
Speaker 4: But that said, I'm wildly attracted to you.
Speaker 3: I'm attracted to you because I think I kind of
Speaker 3: compliment where they don't feel like your friend z owning
Speaker 3: them is important to do that, but there's one hundred
Speaker 3: percent can say Okay, take this a compliment. What I
Speaker 3: love to just take off my clothes and you know,
Speaker 3: get with you one hundred percent. But I'm just not
Speaker 3: not yet. I want to get to know you better.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you could also say, you could say, you know what,
Speaker 1: I actually like you, which is why I want to wait.
Speaker 3: That's period, and you could cheer that while you're drinking
Speaker 3: saying whatever it might be, you can make it playful
Speaker 3: and cute. And it's also okay to have sex one
Speaker 3: night and then the next to say, you know what,
Speaker 3: I want to continue gangs to know you better, whatever
Speaker 3: it might be. But the biggest thing is no game
Speaker 3: playing and no using is a is a weapon.
Speaker 1: Okay, no dangling it and not making it like it's
Speaker 1: a You signed a contract because you you did it.
Speaker 2: Okay that that.
Speaker 1: Yeah, people probably are like, well, you slept with me
Speaker 1: and then you didn't calm exactly. That's a great note.
Speaker 1: That's what you mean by not using it as a
Speaker 1: Oh that's a good one. Most people don't talk about
Speaker 1: that because every girl that I know has said, no,
Speaker 1: he slept with me, that I didn't hear from him
Speaker 1: for two days.
Speaker 2: Okay, well you slept with him, right.
Speaker 3: You're using his weapon, and now you're getting you're getting
Speaker 3: mad at him, but it was your actions and now
Speaker 3: you're playing yes, And now you're playing a game silent contract.
Speaker 4: He didn't sign that contract, and you're acting like the victim.
Speaker 3: When you have to realize take responsibility, be your main
Speaker 3: character and be happy, Like, don't always beat yourself up
Speaker 3: by these decisions that you make. I also think in
Speaker 3: life we learn the most important lessons through the mistakes,
Speaker 3: Like the failures, not the successes, is where the most
Speaker 3: growth happens. But actually could turn you into a kinder,
Speaker 3: better person because you have more empathy and compassion for
Speaker 3: those around you when you've happened things have happened to
Speaker 3: you in the past that you have a better understanding
Speaker 3: and deeper appreciation for it.
Speaker 2: Yeah, okay, that's a stute.
Speaker 4: You can't have anger in your heart for men. That
Speaker 4: does my other thing, it's.
Speaker 2: Like, right, the whole guys suck. I hate that.
Speaker 4: Yeah, you can't.
Speaker 3: Guys don't as so, like when you're talking about on dates,
Speaker 3: men's and tenas are up, how are they talking about
Speaker 3: their path about the father of their children? How are
Speaker 3: they talking about the current relationship and the dynamics is
Speaker 3: there is there a lot of volatile viatility around the relationship.
Speaker 3: What am I stepping into? Am I stepping into toxic land?
Speaker 3: Am I stepping into?
Speaker 4: Wow?
Speaker 3: She it's peaceful, and she speaks highly about her children.
Speaker 3: She speaks highly about her former or ex or her late.
Speaker 3: The thing is is it doesn't have to eat rainbows
Speaker 3: and unicorns. But until someone knows you save the you
Speaker 3: can save more of the realness and put things into
Speaker 3: context when you have future dates, but the initial date.
Speaker 4: Make sure that you're just speaking with warmth and love.
Speaker 3: And even if you there's so many negative thoughts you
Speaker 3: could say about your ex, you could say, I don't
Speaker 3: speak negatively about what the bother my children. There's so
Speaker 3: many blessings that came out of that. When I know,
Speaker 3: when you're better, I'll tell you more. But just know,
Speaker 3: like so hat like I have person my kids are
Speaker 3: great and great, and just couch it where you're not lying.
Speaker 4: You're being authentic, but you're not.
Speaker 3: It's not a therapy session where you're venting about all
Speaker 3: the things you don't like in your life.
Speaker 2: No, and it can be it can slip in.
Speaker 1: It doesn't even have to be so overt as you're saying,
Speaker 1: someone asks you a question, how is it with your family?
Speaker 1: And like somehow you're on a road. You have to
Speaker 1: be like, you're in an interview. I've done this through
Speaker 1: the media. Yeah, you have to divert to something else.
Speaker 1: You're like, listen, is anything perfect? Now? He's great, it's
Speaker 1: my My daughter has a great relationship with him, and
Speaker 1: I would never say anything negative.
Speaker 4: Yeah, and I'm happy with where him today.
Speaker 3: And have like an elevator speech where its two sentences
Speaker 3: and it's almost like you know a gymnastics routine. You
Speaker 3: do the round off flip flops, then you stick it
Speaker 3: and you stop and you not over talk.
Speaker 4: You just answer the question and smaya.
Speaker 1: It's so true because I remember literally dating is like
Speaker 1: reality TV because you're the game is moving fast. You
Speaker 1: might have had something to drink, You've been asked a question.
Speaker 1: The person doesn't know you. If you're already in a relationship,
Speaker 1: it's your husb. When you could say something stupid, it
Speaker 1: doesn't matter. But you're now on a job interview and
Speaker 1: you're saying something and you're in your head about what
Speaker 1: you've just said, but you got to correct it because
Speaker 1: it's your on live television right now, So and you
Speaker 1: got to just you know, regroup so you don't fuck
Speaker 1: it up worse and people, I mean, it really happens
Speaker 1: with alcohol.
Speaker 3: Absolutely, And that's why I went back to let's first
Speaker 3: talk about did you eat before your date? Did you
Speaker 3: take supplements or medications on an empty stomach? Because you
Speaker 3: you're nervous and you want to make sure you eat
Speaker 3: on your date. You have to know yourself like do
Speaker 3: you need a little bit of food before you go
Speaker 3: on your date and and eat like pre eater that
Speaker 3: tempe of a thing, or do you need to have
Speaker 3: a glass of wine so that you're just not so
Speaker 3: nervous and you actually a little more verbal.
Speaker 1: Or like you're wearing something itchy and you start sweating
Speaker 1: like crazy, stuff does happen like you like your hair
Speaker 1: frizzes out. You're feeling self conscious, like stuff does happen
Speaker 1: on dates. It's like reality TV.
Speaker 4: Yeah I've got a stomach rip.
Speaker 3: But I think the biggest takeaway is keep it positive,
Speaker 3: keep it light.
Speaker 4: It's not a therapy session.
Speaker 3: And then also is how you people are aware of
Speaker 3: how you treat weight staff right so, and it's not
Speaker 3: gender specific, it's are you bossy, Are you negative? Are
Speaker 3: you complaining? It's like those little things that add up.
Speaker 3: So it's just be mindful of how you are on
Speaker 3: the day. Because it is a job interview, it's also
Speaker 3: people are being mindful. Is this someone I want to
Speaker 3: get to know and spend my precious time with. I
Speaker 3: constantly hear that type of feedback.
Speaker 1: I can see that men get irritated when they've told
Speaker 1: you something and you don't remember because you weren't listening.
Speaker 1: I've like seen that, like, oh yeah, I mentioned it,
Speaker 1: and you just inside feel like you want to die
Speaker 1: because you missed it. They don't like that, or.
Speaker 3: You're questioning interrogating them about who else they're dating or
Speaker 3: their love life. It's it's don't everyone has a pass
Speaker 3: and everyone should be quality dating until you meet the
Speaker 3: right person that you choose.
Speaker 4: To be exclusive with.
Speaker 3: So the biggest thing is don't talk about who you're
Speaker 3: dating or go into the whole thing. Just enjoy who
Speaker 3: you're with, knowing that everyone has had a pain and
Speaker 3: it's okay if they're dating, but they're going to feel
Speaker 3: on the defense if you're just pressing questions.
Speaker 1: Right like you like them and you're asking them about
Speaker 1: who else they're dating on the date, like let them
Speaker 1: they're dating, like you're dating, so they could sleep with
Speaker 1: four other people.
Speaker 2: It's like you're just meeting them.
Speaker 4: You're just meeting them, and they don't owe you anything.
Speaker 3: But the biggest thing is use your opportunity to shine
Speaker 3: and be playful and be so interesting and captivating that
Speaker 3: they don't remember anybody else, no matteryone else they're dating,
Speaker 3: because at the end of the day, you always think
Speaker 3: you remember how that person makes you feel and how
Speaker 3: you feel by your experience. It's not what you the
Speaker 3: words are initially what you say. It's more about how
Speaker 3: do I feel when I'm with this person, and how
Speaker 3: does like the vibe that you get from that experience,
Speaker 3: Like oh my gosh, like that, I feel so good
Speaker 3: about myself and wow, like I really like her, I
Speaker 3: want more, Like I'm just interested by her.
Speaker 1: I had something recently that happened, And ninety nine point
Speaker 1: nine percent of the time, if I leave something in business,
Speaker 1: it's the same way that I walked into it. And
Speaker 1: I've seen the people who come in with the greatest
Speaker 1: integrity and seem like the most prince charming class acts
Speaker 1: exit with a whimper, like really just cowardly enders of relationships.
Speaker 1: Even if you've ended it, they've ended it. Just the
Speaker 1: way they act is so small picture and I've seen
Speaker 1: it and it's just like it could you could have.
Speaker 1: It could be the most amazing Michelin star meal, it
Speaker 1: could be a ten year relationship, and the way it ends,
Speaker 1: you're just like, wow, that's so Recently, there was someone
Speaker 1: who liked me. They made it very clear that they
Speaker 1: liked me, and I don't want to It was borderline
Speaker 1: love bombing. There was like an expectation that I was
Speaker 1: supposed to be responding in the same way that they
Speaker 1: were speaking to me, and it was a little bit
Speaker 1: like drippy for me, and I just wasn't. I don't
Speaker 1: like that feeling of feeling like I have to like
Speaker 1: say something back that I don't feel.
Speaker 2: And I just don't like that.
Speaker 1: So anyway, the person was a lovely person and they
Speaker 1: were very forthcoming about how they liked me. And instead
Speaker 1: of texting, and I don't know them that well, I've
Speaker 1: only been on the phone with them maybe once or twice,
Speaker 1: I called them up and I just said, you know,
Speaker 1: I don't think.
Speaker 2: It's a fit.
Speaker 1: It could be you, it could be me, it could
Speaker 1: be where I am right now. I just don't feel
Speaker 1: like this is a fit. I don't want to lead
Speaker 1: you on. I know you like me, and I just
Speaker 1: don't want you to waste any time. I said it
Speaker 1: in a more eloquent manner, but it was like that,
Speaker 1: and he said, you are a lady.
Speaker 2: You are a class act.
Speaker 1: Like I was literally dumping him, and he was like,
Speaker 1: you are a class act. I've never had someone call me.
Speaker 1: The fact that you didn't text me. We don't really
Speaker 1: know each other that well. And I said, well, I
Speaker 1: have a personal rule that if I if someone turns
Speaker 1: you off, like right in the very beginning, you can
Speaker 1: just blow them off and ghost them. But if I
Speaker 1: feel like someone's been a kind, thoughtful, respectful person and
Speaker 1: I know how they feel about me, I'm going to
Speaker 1: take responsibility for not only my feelings, but theirs and
Speaker 1: the guy someone I work. I thought it was too much,
Speaker 1: but actually sent me like flowers to say thank you
Speaker 1: for the way you handle that. I thought it was nice.
Speaker 3: Look, I think how you closed the door is so
Speaker 3: important because even though he's not for you, the fact
Speaker 3: that he recognized and complimented you. You might think of
Speaker 3: him for somebody else, knowing like, wow, what a gentleman.
Speaker 1: By the way I thought of it already exactly and
Speaker 1: vice versa, and also reputation.
Speaker 3: You might think of someone for you because you didn't
Speaker 3: make a white lie and say I'm back with the
Speaker 3: boyfriend or I'm dating somebody else or it's like those
Speaker 3: type of things bite you. And it's so much better
Speaker 3: to be to end on a class act and just
Speaker 3: kind of wow as you're you know, with a beautiful
Speaker 3: bow by being like you're awesome. I just don't feel
Speaker 3: like our spark has grown, but I wish you the
Speaker 3: best of luck, and whoever's with you is like a
Speaker 3: lucky person and be just a class act about it.
Speaker 3: And that speaks folumes about you and your security and
Speaker 3: the fact that it was so well received by him
Speaker 3: and that he didn't say whatever and he allowed himself
Speaker 3: to be vulnerable and compliment you just speaks volumes that
Speaker 3: he's a nice guy, but maybe not for you.
Speaker 4: There's a lid for every pot could be for somebody.
Speaker 1: Else, right, And also basically like you know, do unto
Speaker 1: others think about how we feel and we're twisting in
Speaker 1: the wind. Like, don't twist people in the wind. And
Speaker 1: the other thing is the second best answer is no,
Speaker 1: maybe is the worst for us, it's the worst for them.
Speaker 1: So if you put it out into the universe like
Speaker 1: and do that, you know that's what you expect.
Speaker 4: Way kinder.
Speaker 3: I mean we always you know, women complain with they
Speaker 3: are ghosted, but then they ghost just as much.
Speaker 2: Totally.
Speaker 3: I think the biggest thing is treat people how you
Speaker 3: want to be treated, and that maybe more people will
Speaker 3: learn the lesson, like, oh, that's how you're supposed to
Speaker 3: do it.
Speaker 4: But it has to start somewhere.
Speaker 3: And I always encourage people that if it's not the
Speaker 3: right connection, to close a loop.
Speaker 4: And it's hard.
Speaker 3: Some people don't want to hurt someone's feelings and it
Speaker 3: feels hurtful, but it is so nice to close the loop,
Speaker 3: have the closure, and it brings that other person so
Speaker 3: much closer to finding their person that then they're like, wow,
Speaker 3: I'm setting a different kind of text and saying, oh
Speaker 3: my gosh, when can I see you next. I have
Speaker 3: clients that we talk about packing patients that were so
Speaker 3: anxious and now they're a relationship and they're like, I
Speaker 3: feel like the luckiest person because I did.
Speaker 4: I waited for the right person.
Speaker 1: I love that. I don't think anyone's talking about the patients.
Speaker 1: No one talks about the patients. Everyone I'm ready, I
Speaker 1: want to. I mean like, I think the patience is
Speaker 1: critical because otherwise you end up buying the wrong thing
Speaker 1: and then you wait. Then you literally could take yourself
Speaker 1: off the market for years and then be like, why
Speaker 1: did I do that? It's the car I talked to
Speaker 1: you about getting in the wrong car. I think it's huge.
Speaker 3: What happens is society pushes you, that wants you to
Speaker 3: get into another relationship quick, and then you feel bad
Speaker 3: that you're not, Like, what's wrong with me?
Speaker 4: I'm not I don't I'm not with anyone.
Speaker 3: So then you feel like other people are judging you
Speaker 3: because you're not with someone, and it's such a couple
Speaker 3: society you live in. That then you feel like, I
Speaker 3: can't go up with my friends because I'm not a wee,
Speaker 3: and then you make bad.
Speaker 4: Decisions the holidays and then Valentine and all.
Speaker 3: That, and then you realize, Okay, now I'm in a
Speaker 3: full fledged relationship with the wrong person. But my friends
Speaker 3: are happy, my family's happy. But if you're not happy,
Speaker 3: it's not worth it. And by the way, your friends
Speaker 3: might be like, what is she going to lose that
Speaker 3: person that's not her guy?
Speaker 4: So don't lie to yourself.
Speaker 3: Just be true to yourself and be Sometimes the best
Speaker 3: relationship is just the one you're making with yourself, and
Speaker 3: realize that in the meantime is such it could be
Speaker 3: such a happy place.
Speaker 4: It doesn't have to be doom and gloom.
Speaker 3: It could be I'm in the era where I'm doing
Speaker 3: what brings me joy and happiness. It maybe because with
Speaker 3: somebody else, I'm gonna be, you know, get in great
Speaker 3: shape for myself, not for anybody else.
Speaker 4: I'm gonna do things to bring me joy. And then
Speaker 4: when you feel.
Speaker 3: Love about yourself, that is going to be a magnet
Speaker 3: to somebody else because they're gonna pick up on your
Speaker 3: happy energy knowing that, Oh my gosh, she's so interesting. Right.
Speaker 1: How often do you see a woman goes out with
Speaker 1: a great guy. You've set them up with a great guy,
Speaker 1: it's teed up for success and the woman fumbles the
Speaker 1: ball like she had it going good, and the guy's like, wow,
Speaker 1: that would have been How often what percentage do you
Speaker 1: see this is for my women out there, because I
Speaker 1: bet you this is a real number. How often do
Speaker 1: you see women fumbling the ball it's theirs to lose?
Speaker 3: I think it's real. I think I would say a
Speaker 3: good thirty percent. I mean I see it ongoing. Where
Speaker 3: someone connects the dots inaccurately is quick because they listen
Speaker 3: to their friends and their critics, either in their mind
Speaker 3: or their friends that haven't been single in a very
Speaker 3: long time and are giving them more advice. Where are there,
Speaker 3: like I said, it could be through alcohol or an
Speaker 3: unhealed heart where they're leading with their insecurities versus is
Speaker 3: everything that's beautiful about them.
Speaker 1: And you're trying to clean up the damage because then
Speaker 1: the guy's like, no way, I don't want to deal
Speaker 1: with this, and then the girl's calling you. He's not
Speaker 1: calling me, and you're like The takeaway is that women
Speaker 1: don't realize by catastrophizing, by being in their own head,
Speaker 1: by making up scenarios, by crowd sourcing information sometimes from
Speaker 1: archaic sources that dated and you know, the the eighties,
Speaker 1: that we are self sabotaging because you're saying you've seen
Speaker 1: it about thirty percent of the time where you have
Speaker 1: teed somebody up. They've got a great guy, you got
Speaker 1: the woman and the guy, and the woman blows up
Speaker 1: the deal because of either drinking, over sharing, catastrophizing, panicking
Speaker 1: too much texting, or being a disaster.
Speaker 3: That's the other thing I always say to it to
Speaker 3: people like sometimes because they don't have the patience, they'll
Speaker 3: run to an app, they'll quickly get on with an
Speaker 3: unhealed heart, and they'll just start dating volume like a
Speaker 3: Vegas buffet. Oh, now they're needing all the you know,
Speaker 3: any kind of equality of man that and they already
Speaker 3: just met them when they or not in a good
Speaker 3: place to meet this person, and they didn't.
Speaker 4: That's not what they should be doing. They should be
Speaker 4: first working in no.
Speaker 1: And then you can get in your own head too,
Speaker 1: Like a person who's had a bunch of bad golf
Speaker 1: games or matches is not his head gets messed up.
Speaker 1: So if you go and you're not prepared to go date,
Speaker 1: and you start just blindly dating as a value business,
Speaker 1: you might get in your head and think think it's you,
Speaker 1: no guy likes you, You're not getting anyone to call
Speaker 1: you back, and then you don't want to do it
Speaker 1: anymore because you just think you're bad at it, but
Speaker 1: it might because you weren't ready one hundred.
Speaker 3: Percent, and so now you don't have the bearer's entry
Speaker 3: or low because you could go on an app and
Speaker 3: meet someone, but you set yourself up for a failure
Speaker 3: because you're not emotionally ready or something about that you're
Speaker 3: not you're the best version of yourself. So that's why
Speaker 3: it's better to wait and be patient and make sure
Speaker 3: that if if you're a ten, you could be looking
Speaker 3: for a ten. If you're a four and you want
Speaker 3: a ten, work on yourself so you are the map
Speaker 3: energy what you're looking for in return. It's almost like
Speaker 3: if I was a stock, what I bet on myself?
Speaker 3: What I pick myself? And if you're like, no, I
Speaker 3: wouldn't because I have these things I have to work on.
Speaker 3: Make sure that you work on them both internally and
Speaker 3: externally to be the person that you want to be with.
Speaker 1: From what I'm hearing Barbie saying, Okay, you're ready to
Speaker 1: date or you want to meet someone, then you decide, Okay,
Speaker 1: what do I need to do to get ready because
Speaker 1: I'm going to the super Bowl. Like I'm going to
Speaker 1: the super Bowl, I'm going to put myself out there
Speaker 1: and I'm going to meet amazing men. I'm going to
Speaker 1: have a quality versus quantity models.
Speaker 2: So what are the rules.
Speaker 1: I want to get myself in emotional shape. I want
Speaker 1: to know my plan ahead of time, meaning I'm not
Speaker 1: going to drink too much. I'm not going to overshare.
Speaker 1: I'm going to be a full person. I'm going to
Speaker 1: be feeling fit, feeling healthy, dressed for the occasion. I'm
Speaker 1: not going to overdate. So I get exhausted and miserable,
Speaker 1: and then you're going to step up to the you know,
Speaker 1: to the plate or show up to the game. I
Speaker 1: think that's great, and people don't do that. You're preparing
Speaker 1: for dating.
Speaker 3: I think if you think about it professionally, everyone knows
Speaker 3: there needs to be a strategic game plan of what
Speaker 3: you need to do to be successful professionally in the
Speaker 3: real world. But when it comes to your personal life,
Speaker 3: you have no plan, no strategy, and no one teaches
Speaker 3: these type of skills that literally it's a skill.
Speaker 4: You have to realize that it does take preparation.
Speaker 3: We put more preparation in you know, throwing a dinner party,
Speaker 3: or in you know, what our betting is going to
Speaker 3: look like then we do in our hearts in terms
Speaker 3: of what we're looking for. And I think the biggest
Speaker 3: thing is silencing the noise, doing an audit of your
Speaker 3: own self, realizing, let be honest with yourself, what do
Speaker 3: I need in a partner?
Speaker 4: What am I looking for? And am I ready physically,
Speaker 4: emotionally mentally?
Speaker 3: What do I need to do? Do I have to
Speaker 3: say no to work more? Do I need to create
Speaker 3: get a babysitter for the kids. But you do need
Speaker 3: to create a game plan of what you need and
Speaker 3: that does include, like you said, physical health, emotional health,
Speaker 3: knowing your limit when it comes to alcohol, knowing what
Speaker 3: you need to do before the date, and knowing like
Speaker 3: listen to yourself in terms of okay, am I happy?
Speaker 3: Happy with myself? And if am I gonna project to others?
Speaker 3: And if you're online, you don't want to. You know,
Speaker 3: you're looking for something really really specific, And there's four
Speaker 3: of those online.
Speaker 4: Don't meet them all until you know, like do one
Speaker 4: at a time.
Speaker 1: And we're saying this, yeah, exactly, be prepared the temperature,
Speaker 1: How am I being received?
Speaker 4: Is this going well? Already just blowing it up?
Speaker 3: And then you're gonna have battle fatigue, and you're gonna
Speaker 3: have a negative attitude and it'll continue.
Speaker 1: I agree, Barbie, that was amazing, so much good information,
Speaker 1: like different information too.
Speaker 2: It's like training