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Speaker 1: Hello the Internet, and welcome to this episode of Pokey

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Speaker 1: Trend Shaped Cheeto in honor of our first story.

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Speaker 2: My name is Jack O'Brien. That over there is Miles Bred.

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Speaker 1: Oh thank you, Oh my god, thank you, thank you,

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Speaker 1: thank you, thank you for thanking me. Oh thank you,

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Speaker 1: right off the bat, Miles. Yep, let's be heard about

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Speaker 1: the rock pipe theory. Shout out Connor O'Malley. Great video

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Speaker 1: that we'll be talking about in a moment probably forever,

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Speaker 1: but forever, for now and forever. But first we got

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Speaker 1: to get to the top story of the day, which

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Speaker 1: is that a Pokemon shaped cheeto sold for nearly ninety

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Speaker 1: thousand dollars according to CNN dot com. At first, I

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Speaker 1: was skeptical, you know, how.

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Speaker 2: Could a cheeto possibly look like a Pokey Maine exactly?

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Speaker 3: But so it looks like charizard it do.

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Speaker 1: So I went, it's in a It's in like a

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Speaker 1: glass case that you would like keep a baseball card in.

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Speaker 1: That's also inside another glass case that you would keep

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Speaker 1: like the crown jewel inside of. So this is a

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Speaker 1: fucking dead stock cheeto. Yeah, this shit never saw the

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Speaker 1: outside of a bag.

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Speaker 2: They were just like gloves. Yeah, exactly dead stock cheeto

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Speaker 2: dust on there bro no dust transfer, no dust transfer

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Speaker 2: even when this thing was being set. Yeah, but so.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, skeptically first when I went and saw it though,

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Speaker 1: So it has this combination of, uh, it actually looks

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Speaker 1: like charzard, but it also looks like a cheeto enough

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Speaker 1: that it looks accidental, you know. Yeah, So that combination

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Speaker 1: makes it one of the finest specimens I've seen. I

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Speaker 1: still think they slightly overpaid it ninety thousand. I'd probably

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Speaker 1: put the value closer to seven dollars and fifty cents,

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Speaker 1: but a remarkable specimen nonetheless.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, you know, yeah, I mean, I'm currently bidding on

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Speaker 2: a cheeto that shaped like the Persian princess Shaherazad, and

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Speaker 2: it's not going about fifteen bucks, right, I think a

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Speaker 2: much more seminal figure. But yeah, whatever, dude, if that's

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Speaker 2: your shit and you have that much money, to fucking

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Speaker 2: piss away and I don't know nothing, nothing means anything,

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Speaker 2: So yeah, buy your ninety thousand dollars.

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Speaker 1: For it really matters. Got I'm a good singers. That's

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Speaker 1: the second story. I'm a really good singer.

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Speaker 2: Third story story this nothing nothing really matters to me.

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Speaker 1: Oh, that was all the same note I was sinking.

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Speaker 1: Maybe it's the same note. All right, big news for us,

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Speaker 1: I guess not us. Right, So there's a new generation here,

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Speaker 1: like starting right now, babies born going forward. So babies

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Speaker 1: up to this point have been JEN Alpha Alpha alf

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Speaker 1: this generation they've decided to just go straight up Gen beta. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: they're calling them jen beta, which that's it feels like

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Speaker 1: they're going to like to watch other babies nursing on

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Speaker 1: their mom like that whatever the cuck equivalent of a

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Speaker 1: baby is.

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Speaker 3: You know, I think that's what.

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Speaker 2: Weird too. Yeah, and they're buying too much avocado toast

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Speaker 2: and not buying enough engagement rings, so they're off.

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Speaker 1: The engagement ring market has fucking collapsed. Things generation started

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Speaker 1: being born. Yeah, they don't have as much disposable wealth

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Speaker 1: as past babies.

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Speaker 2: Uh, it's there. We're so the generation. I'm so sorry.

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Speaker 2: I'm so sorry. And it was like that's what this

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Speaker 2: one's going to be called, more and more screwed. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: these are the people that are like and like the

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Speaker 2: younger Gen Alpha are the people that may live to

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Speaker 2: see the twenty second century, you know what I mean,

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Speaker 2: Like this is this is the way people.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, they should all things. I mean, I think

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Speaker 1: on average they will at this point, born in twenty five,

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Speaker 1: they should, they should get to seventy five, I hope.

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Speaker 2: So, I hope.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, because, as we've seen, healthcare in this country is

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Speaker 1: progressive and just keeps getting better and better. So yeah,

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Speaker 1: surely lifespans will. Oh wait, what's this about nobody regulating

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Speaker 1: air pollution anymore?

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Speaker 2: Never mind, we're all fucked. Good boy, Jen Beta though, Hey,

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Speaker 2: good luck out here.

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Speaker 3: It's tough, Jim Beta, Jim.

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Speaker 1: Beta, you come to me on this day of my

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Speaker 1: daughter's wedding.

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Speaker 3: I don't know. Does it sound does it sound like

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Speaker 3: it could be Jim Beta?

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Speaker 2: I like more bib Fortuna from Star Wars. Ah they

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Speaker 2: want gen Beta and like then Jaba is like, yeah,

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Speaker 2: sounds like a thing, sounds like something.

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Speaker 1: That is what we have figured out. We figured out

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Speaker 1: that I'm a good singer. And Jim Bade sounds like something.

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Speaker 2: It sounds like bid for tuna, talk bib.

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Speaker 1: For tuna, that I need a big fortuna. That's how much.

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Speaker 1: That's how much I'm gonna be housing these fucking poke balls.

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Speaker 1: And dang bib, dang bib, what a stupid joke.

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Speaker 2: You try and tell like some Star Wars fans and

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Speaker 2: like Dode, shut the fuck up. They just try and

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Speaker 2: tell on your podcast.

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Speaker 1: You're tired of talking about Donald Trump, so we're just

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Speaker 1: doing anything to fucking well.

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Speaker 2: Look, there is some news. The Supreme Court did basically

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Speaker 2: say like, sorry, assholes, you got to pay that two

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Speaker 2: billion dollars that you thought you didn't have to pay.

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Speaker 2: So that's that's that's a that's a bit of niceness.

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Speaker 2: What what. They denied Trump's request to block the two

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Speaker 2: billion dollars for an aid payment, so they held up

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Speaker 2: a lower court decision five to for a vote. That's

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Speaker 2: where Amy Coney Barrett and John Roberts flipped on him

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Speaker 2: to get that one to squeak by it. But a

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Speaker 2: lot of it too, is just slip.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: I do call Amy Cony Barrett and John Roberts the

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Speaker 1: flip mode squad. Yeah yeah, you did always say that.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. John Roberts is like the spliff star of the

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Speaker 2: Supreme Court.

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Speaker 1: Slow down shot of Trump, Tony Barrett and her being like, god,

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Speaker 1: damn it it is. Now here's here's my outside theory though,

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Speaker 1: Pardy chess. No, she's praying for him. That would be

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Speaker 1: because so in the clip, she looks at him and

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Speaker 1: then closes her eyes in a pained way, looks directly ahead,

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Speaker 1: closes her eyes again in a pained way.

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Speaker 3: I think a lot of people are.

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Speaker 1: Like that is how I would act if I was

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Speaker 1: like this fucking asshole.

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Speaker 2: But but you think she was trying to most people, I.

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Speaker 1: Think she's just like, dear Lord, please protect him with

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Speaker 1: the Holy Spirit.

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Speaker 2: Your Lord, please protect your lord.

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Speaker 1: Donald Trump, Yes, exactly, Please protect your father.

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Speaker 2: To your father God, please protect your fad they're Donald.

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Speaker 1: And then uh, there's some question on whether he's holding

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Speaker 1: up the tariffs. This is a genre of news story

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Speaker 1: I'm not crazy about where it's like they're trying to

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Speaker 1: go Trump into doing something that's gonna fuck everybody over

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Speaker 1: where they're like, WHOA, well, I thought you were tough

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Speaker 1: with the tariffs, bitch, what do you you know what

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Speaker 1: I mean?

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Speaker 2: Like, I know you have to report on it, But

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Speaker 2: like the thing where.

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Speaker 1: They're like, oh, not such not such a tough guy

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Speaker 1: anymore about the tariffs, or about like the deportation fucking

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Speaker 1: police coming through and they're like, wow, looks like he's

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Speaker 1: not deporting as many people as Biden was. It's like, well, yeah,

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Speaker 1: Biden was a fucking monster. What do you Yeah, we're yeah, anyway, that's.

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Speaker 2: The other thing he was. Well, the other thing too,

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Speaker 2: is like they're talking about potentially taking away Temporary protected

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Speaker 2: status for Ukrainian refugee in the US. Yeah, And then

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Speaker 2: someone asked him in the Oval office. He's like the

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Speaker 2: what like PPS? He said, you said GPS, and they're like, bro,

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Speaker 2: he has my grasp of all the shit, like just

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Speaker 2: sorry GPS.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, are you talking about GPS?

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Speaker 1: Yeah?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, real bad, real bad stuff there.

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Speaker 3: I hate it.

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Speaker 1: Can't even tell me where to go when I say

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Speaker 1: where's toilet when I'm just walking around.

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Speaker 2: This is definitely a bit of pump facing Trump facing

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Speaker 2: on the This is like everything just like the last time.

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Speaker 2: He's like I got them to agree to a great

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Speaker 2: border deal, where they're just like, yeah, we're just doing

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Speaker 2: the same shit. What are you talking about? Like you

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Speaker 2: didn't get anything out of us. And now the talks

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Speaker 2: are that the tariffs will be delayed for about a

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Speaker 2: month on a lot of exports to the United States

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Speaker 2: coming out of Canada Mexico because they will exempt traded

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Speaker 2: goods under the rules of the US Mexico Canada Agreement

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Speaker 2: that trade packed the USMCA from his first term, and

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Speaker 2: it's just all it's just a bunch of fucking.

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Speaker 1: Cho It's my favorite mid major basketball college basketball tournament USMC.

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Speaker 1: He does seem to be like backing down. He's like

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Speaker 1: I'm doing I'm extending this nicety to Mexico because me

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Speaker 1: and shine Bomb are tight. She's cool, she gets me,

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Speaker 1: so I don't know. She continues to be good at

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Speaker 1: her job, so that's cool.

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Speaker 2: So we'll see.

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Speaker 1: I have also been enjoying the meming of jd Vance's

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Speaker 1: big cabbage patch ass face.

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Speaker 3: Uh, that's awesome.

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Speaker 2: Wind milling on him. These memes are some of them

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Speaker 2: are like fucking me. Like visually, they're hard to kind

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Speaker 2: of digest. The JD Vance's pumpkin face.

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Speaker 1: He's just such a like easy canvas to like, you know,

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Speaker 1: with the catch fucking with just so many like now

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Speaker 1: a chairlift can't get off a chairlift because as he

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Speaker 1: was fucking the chairlift like this one. Now, I'm like,

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Speaker 1: I can't picture him. I can only picture the big

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Speaker 1: puffy face him. Uh huh, you know that's all I see.

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Speaker 3: Another one like a minion. Yeah, go with.

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Speaker 2: The whole old school Kate Gosslin, Can I speak to

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Speaker 2: the manager haircut? It all just works. He should have

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Speaker 2: been an actor. This guy could have been, could have

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Speaker 2: done such a chameleon, you know, he could look like

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Speaker 2: the greatest performer, senator, a vice president, a piece of shit, like,

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Speaker 2: whatever you want, he can do it.

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Speaker 1: Well, you're welcome, I guess on the internet's muse. Okay,

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Speaker 1: so yeah, you're welcome for all the memes. All right,

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Speaker 1: let's take a quick break and we'll come back and

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Speaker 1: talk about the pipe rock theory aka the curse of conspiracy.

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Speaker 3: We'll be right back, and we're back.

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Speaker 2: And we're bad.

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Speaker 1: The right is a bit into cursive these days, which

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Speaker 1: feels counter to their whole shit, like that seems like

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Speaker 1: the sort of thing I don't even fucking believe in cursive, dog, Like,

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Speaker 1: I know.

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Speaker 2: Why don't they say? It's like, like, I'm surprised they

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Speaker 2: never went around to like that cursive as woke because

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Speaker 2: they can't do it. It's like, I'm bad at cursive,

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Speaker 2: so that's woke.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: No, they are fucking screaming about cursive handwriting constant because

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Speaker 2: recently the Idaho Senate introduced a bill that would require

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Speaker 2: students to quote be proficient at reading and writing in

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Speaker 2: cursive by the end of fifth grade. But it's already

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Speaker 2: talked in schools in Idaho. But it's now declared an

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Speaker 2: emergency so they can assess students cursive next year. What why?

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Speaker 1: Yeah?

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Speaker 2: Man, but you already do it.

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Speaker 1: We got to address this crisis. Wait, it sounds like

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Speaker 1: have you not heard cursive conspiracy?

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Speaker 3: Piper?

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Speaker 1: All right, we keep referring to this conorill Malley. You're

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Speaker 1: talking about cursive.

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Speaker 2: Theory, you're talking about pipe rock theory.

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Speaker 1: This is a great Connor O'Malley video that you guys

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Speaker 1: just need to go watch.

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Speaker 2: Go to his instagram. It's it's one of the first

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Speaker 2: posts he has.

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Speaker 1: They just nail the tone of ninety percent of podcasts

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Speaker 1: or just.

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Speaker 2: That like pseudo intellectual Broach Bull Show. Yeah, where it's

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Speaker 2: like it's always like, have you heard of this thing?

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Speaker 1: What?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, dude, I just checked it out. Anyway, I can't

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Speaker 2: look at pipe obviously, pipe obviously sitting rock.

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Speaker 1: So this one holds together about as well as well

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Speaker 1: as the fictional pipe rock theory. Their theory is so

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Speaker 1: Obama's common core uh, you know, the like federal rules

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Speaker 1: around public education that still leave like a ton of

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Speaker 1: leeway up.

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Speaker 3: To the states to determine, like, you know, what their per.

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Speaker 2: What the Civil War was about, right exactly.

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Speaker 3: But they did not require cursive at a time when

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Speaker 3: people were starting to communicate almost exclusively through keyboards. Hold

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Speaker 3: on what.

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Speaker 2: They're not required to learn cursive and soma.

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Speaker 1: I'm just saying. I'm just saying. That caught my attention.

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Speaker 3: Uh huh. So now we're thinking about what does Obama

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Speaker 3: want to do? What does he want to do?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, wants to tear up the Constitutionstitution country.

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Speaker 2: So it's the Constitution written in.

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Speaker 1: Fucking English English.

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Speaker 2: Okay, that's true, bro, But like the style of writing

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Speaker 2: on the old paper, the old cop the old printer paper,

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Speaker 2: they wrote on what kind.

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Speaker 1: I've never seen it. I've only That's the thing. I

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Speaker 1: just use it to justify my transphobia. It assumes that

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Speaker 1: people only read the Constitution at the Smithsonian, Like the

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Speaker 1: Constitution has been translated from its original cursive into uh,

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Speaker 1: you know, text on the internet, text on you can

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Speaker 1: get it as a book, notably not written in cursive.

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Speaker 2: And they are still like we got.

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Speaker 3: We got the shit figured out the whole.

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Speaker 1: They're just trying to shut down the Constitution by keeping

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Speaker 1: us from reading the original document in the Smithsonian.

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Speaker 2: That's true because if you can't write cursive, then you

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Speaker 2: can't read cursive constitution incursive. Therefore you do not know

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Speaker 2: about the Constitution, and there's no other way to read

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Speaker 2: it except for going up to the little glass case

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Speaker 2: and reading it through there.

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Speaker 1: So it does like tie into a part of conservatism

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Speaker 1: where they just like to I don't know, they like

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Speaker 1: rules that they like to be like told they're being

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Speaker 1: like bad or good and like, you know, fuck free thought,

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Speaker 1: Let's just learn how to like make these shapes, you know.

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Speaker 1: So they're like, yeah, this is cool. Let's let's focus.

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Speaker 3: On cursive again and again.

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Speaker 2: And the thing that people were it wasn't really being taught.

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Speaker 2: It's like, I, man, have you tried to write cursive?

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Speaker 2: I know we were taught cursive, you know, but you

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Speaker 2: what's what's the last time you actually wrote in cursive?

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Speaker 3: I tried up Billy Madison. I'm Billy Madison. Man, We're rude.

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Speaker 2: I am you.

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Speaker 1: You asked me to. If anybody hasn't seen Billy Madison,

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Speaker 1: he's asked to write uto in cursive and.

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Speaker 3: His cursive Z is just uh.

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Speaker 2: Quigly like this. It's so hard to do.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, they're really a lot of work.

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Speaker 2: I hate it, right because I could. I couldn't nail

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Speaker 2: an upper case like a capital G incursive and that's like,

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Speaker 2: you know, fundamental to writing my name. And I just

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Speaker 2: hate the way it looked. It looked like a weird

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Speaker 2: I don't asks character or something. Yeah, is this shiit?

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Speaker 1: No, it's like got curls in all four corners kind

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Speaker 1: of yeah.

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Speaker 2: No, it's tough. It's tough, so I don't know. It's

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Speaker 2: also weird.

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Speaker 1: Wait is the no the uppercase b's alright, yeah, that's

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Speaker 1: one's easier. Yeah, but there's there is something you hit

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Speaker 1: Q you fucking talking about?

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Speaker 3: All right?

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Speaker 2: WHOA do it? Please?

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Speaker 3: Please thank you?

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Speaker 1: Why did they make it? Why did they make the

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Speaker 1: queue so complicated?

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Speaker 2: Yep, I'm just saying, Actually, it's not that I should

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Speaker 2: look like it too. Never mind, it just looks like

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Speaker 2: it too.

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Speaker 1: But that's confusing, And what who's the second parties.

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Speaker 2: Were getting stupid or even trying to even think about

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Speaker 2: how it's fucking connected.

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Speaker 3: Have you heard of biproctery.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I heard a biproctery.

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Speaker 1: It does seem like the Republicans have been trying to

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Speaker 1: make this one of their cultural war causes for a while.

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Speaker 1: In twenty thirteen, North Carolina Republicans brag that they had

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Speaker 1: reinstated cursive in a list of accomplishments that also included

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Speaker 1: tax cuts, abortion restrictions, and the right to carry a

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Speaker 1: gun into a bar or restaurant.

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Speaker 2: And cursive fulk.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, because kids need a little discipline.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean that there again, there's like just study

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Speaker 2: after study shows there's no fucking difference when you learn

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Speaker 2: how to write in which one doesn't. There's no advantage

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Speaker 2: to either. Uh, and I don't know. I mean, like

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Speaker 2: we writing evolves over time. I mean I remember in

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Speaker 2: an era where there was no cursive.

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Speaker 3: I think when what was that?

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Speaker 2: You remember an era? I don't know, No, man, I

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Speaker 2: don't think so. Man, Yeah, I think that's been interested. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: you're right, I guess I should keep it.

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Speaker 1: My mom has beautiful handwriting. I just want to say,

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Speaker 1: a beautiful cursive ship. Yeah, cursive, all cursive.

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Speaker 2: It is interesting to see because like you can almost

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Speaker 2: you can see it's funny I can tell like a

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Speaker 2: Japanese person's handwriting in English, because everyone learns to write

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Speaker 2: in English the same way that like I can look

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Speaker 2: at I go, this is a Japanese person writing in English,

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Speaker 2: because like, neither to. It's just the way. It's just

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Speaker 2: the way the shapes of the letters are and things

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Speaker 2: like that. It's not necessarily that it's like beautiful, but

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Speaker 2: it has like a distinct style. But it's also funny.

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Speaker 2: I think, like, when I think of my grandmother's cursive handwriting,

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Speaker 2: it looks like the fucking Constitution, right, how the fuck

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Speaker 2: are you? I'm like, I can barely write this fast.

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Speaker 1: Or yeah, my mom's penmanship is beautiful and completely impenetrable.

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Speaker 3: I don't know what any of it says.

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Speaker 2: It's not that I'm illiterate, it's that this curse it's

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Speaker 2: all fucking weird.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, all right, two quick stories here, okay, close

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Speaker 1: to my I thought of you. I thought of you

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Speaker 1: when I saw this, all right, So on the Yeah.

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Speaker 1: The Academy Museum groupid Trip announced that they have coming

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Speaker 1: for the fiftieth anniversary of a little film called Joels.

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Speaker 1: As my cousin said it, They have the Jaws exhibition

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Speaker 1: Jaws the exhibition.

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Speaker 3: I mean, it's.

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Speaker 1: Got everything, it's got everything, it's got the the fin

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Speaker 1: I think was the one thing I see.

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Speaker 3: Fin up there.

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Speaker 2: I can't wait to see the news article about local

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Speaker 2: man tries to get his whole ship bit by an

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Speaker 2: electronic Jaws exhibit.

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Speaker 1: But they do have Jaws hanging in the museum already. Yeah, so,

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Speaker 1: I mean I've already been pretty Uh.

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Speaker 2: You had your eye on that thing Horny on.

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Speaker 1: Maine while touring that touring that museum act Jacked.

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Speaker 2: Why are you looking at that? Let's just go, let's

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Speaker 2: go see the original Rosebud?

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Speaker 3: Why are you sweating so much?

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Speaker 2: Nothing? When I saw that sled from Citizen Kane? Is

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Speaker 2: that real?

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Speaker 3: They have the sled from Citizen?

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Speaker 2: There's like two Yeah, apparently they made two rose Buds.

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Speaker 2: Is Rosebud the sled?

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Speaker 3: Yay? Miles fucking spoiler dude.

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Speaker 2: So I don't give a fuck, And I don't know

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Speaker 2: what the fuck that is. I ain't watching this shit. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: I just know. I just know what I was lying.

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Speaker 2: But I remember it was there, and I just remember, like,

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Speaker 2: all right, another, I mean, I guess it just shows

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Speaker 2: you how different people attach meaning to film like where

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Speaker 2: I know it just sort of as a cultural thing.

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Speaker 2: Never seen it. Not interested it's black and white. Sorry, can't.

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Speaker 1: Sorry that movie isn't a movie.

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Speaker 2: That's a historical doc. There's only one black and white movie.

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Speaker 2: I know. It's called eraser Head, Okay, and I will

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Speaker 2: then I'm sticking to that.

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Speaker 1: But they showed you that before you had seen the

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Speaker 1: color ones, So.

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Speaker 2: You're like, is this what movies are? I guess all

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Speaker 2: black and movies are like, but yeah, I don't know.

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Speaker 2: This looks like I don't know. Just from the ad

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Speaker 2: for it, it looked like they had so much of the

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Speaker 2: original props and objects that.

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Speaker 1: They Like the Godfather exhibit that they had was really solid,

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Speaker 1: Like they had that really good footage of like people

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Speaker 1: trying out for the various roles the different.

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Speaker 2: Sets they rebuilt inside.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, really cool.

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Speaker 1: So like this is gonna be fucking level three gush

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Speaker 1: for this bogs.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, where he's like, I'm about to fucking hide in

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Speaker 2: the Academy Museum Night at the Museum, folks, Me and Jaws. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: September fourteenth. Anyway, that's it. That's just like the most

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Speaker 2: la thing that we could have said right now, Like

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Speaker 2: do the jaws exhibit Jaws EXHIBI jowels. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: And then also Taco Bell had so they do like

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Speaker 1: a parody of tech conference keynotes where they announce upcoming.

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00:21:31,359 --> 00:21:32,560
Speaker 2: Products so funny.

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Speaker 3: So they did one.

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Speaker 1: It's so funny, you guys, get god, why this one?

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Speaker 1: They're like stvery shitting on their old like chicken products

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00:21:41,280 --> 00:21:44,199
Speaker 1: while introducing some that like don't seem better than the

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Speaker 1: old chicken product. Like they're like the they made fun of,

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Speaker 1: like the chicken biscuit taco. They're like, why why would

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Speaker 1: we have done this? I'm like, I don't know that

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00:21:55,040 --> 00:21:57,440
Speaker 1: shit sounds good. I just like didn't have time to

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Speaker 1: eat it.

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Speaker 2: The new biscuit chicken taco just crispy chicken in a burrito.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I love it.

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Speaker 2: Well anyways, won't try it because I only eat the

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Speaker 2: same four things. Sorry, Taco Bell, you won't get me.

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Speaker 2: You're sorry, you can't do it.

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Speaker 3: That's good.

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Speaker 1: That's gonna be their next move. It's gonna be the

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Speaker 1: equivalent of the like forced obsolescence that Apple does where

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Speaker 1: the food goes bad really quickly, right.

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Speaker 2: Where you're like, oh I can't eat this, I better

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Speaker 2: get the new thing. Sure, all right.

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Speaker 1: That is the episode for today, Thursday, March sixth. We

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Speaker 1: are back tomorrow with a whole last episode of the show.

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Speaker 1: Until then, be kind to each other and be kind

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Speaker 1: to yourself. Get the vaccines while you still can, get

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Speaker 1: your flu shots while you still can. Don't do nothing

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00:22:46,480 --> 00:22:49,240
Speaker 1: about white supremacy, and we will connect to you at tomorrow.

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Speaker 2: Bite peace,