Speaker 1: My colleagues will stop commenting on everything I get my
Speaker 1: assistant roles at people and meeting Why does my coworker
Speaker 1: keep taking credit for all my ideas? Have any wisdom
Speaker 1: for me? Hi'm Alison Green. Welcome to the Aska Manager Podcast.
Speaker 1: Right answer questions from listeners about life at work, everything
Speaker 1: from what to say if you're allergic to your coworkers
Speaker 1: perfume to what to do if you drink too much
Speaker 1: at the company party. Let's get started, Hi, and welcome
Speaker 1: to the show. Today. We have a bunch of shorter
Speaker 1: questions from people to answer, and our first question is
Speaker 1: from someone who is managing people for the first time
Speaker 1: and wondering what the hell she's supposed to talk about
Speaker 1: with them when she does one on one meetings. Hi, Allison,
Speaker 1: I'm a new department director, promoted to my position a
Speaker 1: little over a year ago. I manage a team of
Speaker 1: around fifteen, out of whom are direct report staff. When
Speaker 1: I took over this department, it was a train wreck,
Speaker 1: and even our company president would agree with that assessment.
Speaker 1: I've spent my time trying to get everything back on track,
Speaker 1: meeting deadlines and getting some more in depth regulatory training
Speaker 1: for all of us, and now I'm pleased to say
Speaker 1: that the department is significantly improved. We're moving in the
Speaker 1: same direction, deadlines are being met. I feel like I
Speaker 1: can take a step back and the entire department can
Speaker 1: take a breath. And one of your podcasts, The Talkative
Speaker 1: Intern from July eight, two thousand eighteen, you talked about
Speaker 1: the importance of regular one on one meetings with employees,
Speaker 1: and it was like someone turned the lights on for me.
Speaker 1: I haven't been doing that. You see, my background is
Speaker 1: project management, and this is the first time that I've
Speaker 1: managed humans. So I had to do an internet search
Speaker 1: about what these meetings should look like, and of course
Speaker 1: I started with ask a manager. I literally have no idea.
Speaker 1: So I went ahead and started these meetings this week,
Speaker 1: even though I'm still fumbling in the dark sum But
Speaker 1: I would love your thoughts on what a typical check
Speaker 1: in meeting would look like. About how long should it last?
Speaker 1: Is there a standard length of time that we should
Speaker 1: spend in these meetings? Is there anything that should be
Speaker 1: covered in every single meeting with each employee? Is there
Speaker 1: a good standard on frequency or does that totally depend
Speaker 1: on your staff and your business and what everyone does
Speaker 1: and what projects you have going on, etcetera, etcetera. I've
Speaker 1: learned so much about managing employees since i started listening
Speaker 1: to the podcast and reading your blog, and so I'm
Speaker 1: really looking forward to your input on these very important meetings. Thanks.
Speaker 1: I'm really excited to get this question because doing check
Speaker 1: in meetings well. Doing them well can make a huge
Speaker 1: difference and how effectively you're managing your team and how
Speaker 1: much your employees themselves feel like they're on track. I
Speaker 1: know it might not sound like the most exciting topic
Speaker 1: to people listening, but I think it kind of is
Speaker 1: because doing these right can be the entire backbone of management.
Speaker 1: It's really really key, and so many people don't really
Speaker 1: do them effectively if they do them at all. The
Speaker 1: idea is that having a regular time to touch base
Speaker 1: one and one with each of your staff people about
Speaker 1: their work keeps you both focused on the results that
Speaker 1: they're getting and creates a place for you to check
Speaker 1: on how projects are coming, serve as a resource to them,
Speaker 1: agree in priorities, and give feedback. They're really your core
Speaker 1: forum for management. They're the primary place where you do
Speaker 1: the work of managing. You asked how often to have them.
Speaker 1: For most people, meeting weekly works well, but if you
Speaker 1: have more experienced staffers, or if you have people whose
Speaker 1: work just doesn't require weekly conversation, you could do every
Speaker 1: other week most of the time, though I wouldn't do
Speaker 1: less frequently than every other week, and usually they're going
Speaker 1: to be thirty to sixty minutes somewhere in there. I
Speaker 1: would start in the beginning scheduling them for an hour
Speaker 1: and see how they go. If you keep finding that
Speaker 1: you don't need that much time, you can always cut
Speaker 1: them down. And something that's really key is always use
Speaker 1: an agenda so that you're both clear ahead of time
Speaker 1: and how you're going to be using the time. You
Speaker 1: can ask your employee to prepare that agenda and send
Speaker 1: it to you ahead of time, and you can ask
Speaker 1: that it includes specific sections each week, so things like
Speaker 1: a section for key project updates, a section for priorities
Speaker 1: for the coming week, a section for items that need
Speaker 1: your feedback, a section for anything that the person is
Speaker 1: waiting on you for. And then don't just use their agenda,
Speaker 1: I mean use it, but add your own things to it.
Speaker 1: Jot down your own items that you want to raise,
Speaker 1: and actually before the meeting it's a really good idea
Speaker 1: to just take a few minutes and kind of reflect,
Speaker 1: ask yourself, what are you the most war worried about
Speaker 1: as it relates to this person or to their work.
Speaker 1: What do you really want to use the time to
Speaker 1: focus on. It sounds obvious, but making yourself do that
Speaker 1: every time can make sure that you're focusing on the
Speaker 1: right things. For example, you might realize one day, Oh,
Speaker 1: the thing that I'm most worried about in Jane's realm
Speaker 1: is the question of what more we need to do
Speaker 1: to generate ticket sales for our upcoming event. So I
Speaker 1: want to spend some time with her brainstorming other approaches
Speaker 1: we could use. Or you might realize Jane has seemed
Speaker 1: kind of off her normally very good game lately, so
Speaker 1: I want to ask her if she's doing okay and
Speaker 1: if there's anything going on that I can support her with.
Speaker 1: So it might be the stuff that you're most worried
Speaker 1: about that you most want to talk about, might be
Speaker 1: the day to day work, or it might be something
Speaker 1: a little bit more big picture when you step back
Speaker 1: and really think about it. It's also helpful to keep
Speaker 1: a running list throughout the week of things that you
Speaker 1: want to raise at the check in, which could be
Speaker 1: like a piece of feedback that you want to give,
Speaker 1: or a reminder to yourself that the staff person was
Speaker 1: supposed to check into topic X, but you haven't heard
Speaker 1: any update, and so you want to follow up on
Speaker 1: it or so forth. By keeping a running list all
Speaker 1: week long, that way, you won't forget anything when the
Speaker 1: check in comes around, and you also won't be bugging
Speaker 1: people throughout the week about things that can wait for
Speaker 1: your time together, and that can be helpful in making
Speaker 1: sure that people don't feel like you're sort of hovering.
Speaker 1: I would also consider having a section on the agenda
Speaker 1: for reflecting on what has gone well recently and what
Speaker 1: could have gone better, and you can ask the employee
Speaker 1: to bring their own thoughts on that. You can make
Speaker 1: it part of the agenda that you're using every week.
Speaker 1: You can ask them to come prepared to share their
Speaker 1: thoughts on that, and you'll offer your own. And doing
Speaker 1: that is so useful because it makes feedback just a normal,
Speaker 1: regular part of your meetings, and it's super helpful. When
Speaker 1: you normalize feedback like that, it doesn't feel so scary
Speaker 1: to people, and you ensure that there's this constant flow
Speaker 1: of both positive and developmental feedback, which is a really
Speaker 1: awesome thing to have. Now, what you don't what to
Speaker 1: do with these meetings is have them turn into just
Speaker 1: a big list of project updates where the person just
Speaker 1: runs down everything they're working on and where it stands,
Speaker 1: and then the meeting ends. The point of these meetings
Speaker 1: is not to make the person document where their time
Speaker 1: went that week. It's to see how the person is
Speaker 1: progressing towards their big goals, ask probing questions, spot any
Speaker 1: areas of concern, serve as a resource to them, help
Speaker 1: problem solve if needed, help balance priorities, debrief projects, and
Speaker 1: give feedback. So make sure that you're not letting these
Speaker 1: just turn into like a report on how the person
Speaker 1: spent their time in the last week. That's not what
Speaker 1: you're doing here. And actually you can even ask people
Speaker 1: to include short, bulleted updates in the agenda that they
Speaker 1: send you ahead of time, so that you can read
Speaker 1: those before the meeting, and then that way that's out
Speaker 1: of the way and you can spend your face to
Speaker 1: face time on the stuff that really requires conversation. And
Speaker 1: then I'm also going to point you to my book
Speaker 1: and management, because there is a whole chapter in are
Speaker 1: on how to do check in meetings. Well. So the
Speaker 1: book is called Managing to Change the World, The Nonprofit
Speaker 1: Manager's Guide to Getting Results, and as you can tell
Speaker 1: by the title, it is written for nonprofit managers, but
Speaker 1: like of what's in there is going to apply in
Speaker 1: any sector, so hopefully that will be a good resource too.
Speaker 1: We will take a quick break here and come right back. Hi, Alison.
Speaker 1: First off, thank you for your great podcast on work
Speaker 1: questions in the like. I found myself off in relating
Speaker 1: to a lot of the issues that come up in
Speaker 1: somewhere or another, and it has definitely helped me navigate
Speaker 1: my office culture, so thank you. I wanted to email
Speaker 1: you about an issue that has come up often in
Speaker 1: my career in regards to doing the right thing. I'm
Speaker 1: a late twenties male who has been working in a
Speaker 1: technical environment for the entirety of my career. I don't
Speaker 1: know if it has just been the companies that I've
Speaker 1: worked for, but there seems to be a prevailing issue
Speaker 1: of image versus actions in guards to people's behavior when
Speaker 1: working in an office environment. When things go wrong, which
Speaker 1: they inevitably will, because nobody is perfect, there tends to
Speaker 1: be a flurry of finger pointing and claims of innocence
Speaker 1: with no accountability of the issue. Accountability has brought up
Speaker 1: a lot, and what I mean by accountability is the
Speaker 1: person holding themselves accountable for their own quality of work.
Speaker 1: I find myself to be a person with integrity who
Speaker 1: does not like throwing people under the bus. I will
Speaker 1: also readily admit when I have made a mistake. The
Speaker 1: thing I have an issue with is that if I'm
Speaker 1: the only one who does these things, I end up
Speaker 1: looking like a screw up instead of building a reputation
Speaker 1: as someone who is honest with themselves. Even worse, those
Speaker 1: with machavelli in tendencies can achieve a lot before someone
Speaker 1: sees the person behind the curtain if at all, and
Speaker 1: will steamroll over people like me if I wait for
Speaker 1: the higher ups to quote unquote see through what is happening.
Speaker 1: Office environments are full of these types of people who
Speaker 1: will kick and claw and tear others down to look
Speaker 1: useful to their boss or others. I want to succeed,
Speaker 1: but I want to do so honestly, and I want
Speaker 1: to earn it. Am I just not cut out for
Speaker 1: working in an office. Thanks. I wish I knew what
Speaker 1: field you work in, because I don't actually think that
Speaker 1: this is typical. There are certainly people everywhere who are
Speaker 1: just out for themselves and who are willing to step
Speaker 1: on other people in order to advance, but they usually
Speaker 1: stand out as pretty unusual. They're not typically the majority
Speaker 1: of people in an office, unless you're in a dysfunctional
Speaker 1: office or a dysfunctional field. So I'm very curious about
Speaker 1: what work you do, because some fields are definitely more
Speaker 1: populated by jerks than others. But so often this kind
Speaker 1: of behavior is because the organization's culture allows it. You
Speaker 1: don't find it in offices that prioritize transparency and integrity
Speaker 1: and where leaders are modeling those things themselves. If I
Speaker 1: were in your shoes, I would try to get a
Speaker 1: read on is this just your industry or have you
Speaker 1: worked at particularly bad companies. One way to do that
Speaker 1: is to seek out a mentor someone who works in
Speaker 1: your field but is a bit more experience than you
Speaker 1: and talk to them about what you're seeing. Ask if
Speaker 1: they think it's just the nature of the work that
Speaker 1: you're doing, or if it sounds off to them, or
Speaker 1: if you have friends who also work in your field
Speaker 1: at different companies, you can bounce this off them as well.
Speaker 1: My hunch is that it's about the companies that you've
Speaker 1: been at. You said you're late twenties, so that's probably
Speaker 1: something like one to three companies, I'm guessing, and that's
Speaker 1: not a huge sample size to draw conclusions based off of.
Speaker 1: But certainly by the time you're seeing it for the
Speaker 1: third time in a row, you're naturally going to start
Speaker 1: to wonder. So talk to someone who's in the same field,
Speaker 1: who has a more senior vantage point on it, and
Speaker 1: see what they say. But to answer your broader question, no,
Speaker 1: this is not just the way offices work. It might
Speaker 1: be the way your offices have worked so far, but
Speaker 1: it's not a normal thing. So the next time that
Speaker 1: your job searching, I would really dig into the culture
Speaker 1: of anywhere that you're can that are in taking a job,
Speaker 1: and really prioritize cultures that do emphasize transparency and learning
Speaker 1: from mistakes, and try to talk to people who work
Speaker 1: there before you take your next job so that you
Speaker 1: can figure out if it's just going to be the
Speaker 1: same thing all over again. And actually, one other thing
Speaker 1: that can help with this is having a really good
Speaker 1: relationship with your manager. I would really lean into developing that,
Speaker 1: like building trust and credibility with your boss, because that
Speaker 1: will pay off in two different ways. One, you say
Speaker 1: that you feel like being really upfront about your mistakes
Speaker 1: is making you look like you're a screw up because
Speaker 1: no one else is doing it. But if you have
Speaker 1: a really good, strong relationship with your boss, that is
Speaker 1: less likely to happen because your boss will know you
Speaker 1: and will know that you're very upfront about that kind
Speaker 1: of thing, and if they're at all a decent boss,
Speaker 1: they should respect or at least understand that. And then
Speaker 1: the second way that it can help is if you
Speaker 1: develop a good enough for poor with your boss, potentially
Speaker 1: you can ask her about this too, and she will
Speaker 1: be really well positioned to talk to you with much
Speaker 1: more nuanced than I can about what you're seeing in
Speaker 1: your company and whether you're reading it right. So I
Speaker 1: would really work on building that relationship. Good luck. Okay,
Speaker 1: here is our next question. Hi, Alison, thanks so much
Speaker 1: for taking my question. I am a teacher who started
Speaker 1: a new program with another teacher last year. We worked
Speaker 1: together really well and we're generally thought to be successful
Speaker 1: by the administrator supervising the program. There is one issue
Speaker 1: I had, though, that I'm curious about how you would
Speaker 1: suggest I approach. Part of this program requires frequent record
Speaker 1: keeping about his progress. One agreement that my colleague and
Speaker 1: I came to is that we would split up the
Speaker 1: work to make it easier to great students and to
Speaker 1: keep up with all the paperwork. However, my colleague often
Speaker 1: waited over a month to update his share of the paperwork.
Speaker 1: At one point I offered to do it if he
Speaker 1: was having trouble peping up with it, but he insisted
Speaker 1: that he could do it and wanted to handle it
Speaker 1: and didn't want to place an unfair burden on me.
Speaker 1: I also feel a little weird about continuing to make
Speaker 1: that offer, as I'm worried about gender dynamics. I'm a woman,
Speaker 1: he's a man, and I know often in these situations
Speaker 1: women get stuck with the clerical work. On the other hand,
Speaker 1: to measure our progress, it's important that the records are
Speaker 1: kept up to date, and I'd rather do it myself
Speaker 1: and have access to the information we need than to
Speaker 1: wait for him. We're about to finish our training process,
Speaker 1: with our new set of students, and I'm worried about
Speaker 1: this happening again once the paperwork increases. The hope and
Speaker 1: goal is that our program is going to expand, which
Speaker 1: means that the record keeping will only get more intense.
Speaker 1: We don't have hard deadlines for this, which I think
Speaker 1: maybe makes him feel like it's fine if he puts
Speaker 1: it off. However, there is an expectation that we are
Speaker 1: keeping our records up to date in a timely fashion.
Speaker 1: Am I being a control freak about this? How do
Speaker 1: you suggest I approach him about it again? Since the
Speaker 1: last time I tried I wasn't successful. I do not
Speaker 1: think you're being a control freak about it. It sounds
Speaker 1: like the record keeping has to be done. I think
Speaker 1: it's good, though, that he did not take you up
Speaker 1: in your offer to do it for him, because he
Speaker 1: really should be doing it himself, and because you're right
Speaker 1: about the gender dynamics where women often step in and
Speaker 1: do more than their share of the sort of office
Speaker 1: housekeeping type work, because we're socialized to care about it
Speaker 1: more and to be bothered by it more when it's
Speaker 1: not done, and to be somewhat comfortable with just stepping
Speaker 1: up and doing it so that it is done, even
Speaker 1: if we're annoyed that we have to do it. So, yeah,
Speaker 1: it's not good for anyone when you step in and
Speaker 1: do that because someone else isn't pulling their weight. The
Speaker 1: exception to that can be if you agree upfront to
Speaker 1: divide the work that way, and in exchange he takes
Speaker 1: on something roughly equivalent in terms of time and energy
Speaker 1: that you would prefer not to do. But even then
Speaker 1: you have to be careful that you don't get the
Speaker 1: short end of the stick there, because if the thing
Speaker 1: that he takes on in exchange is more high profile
Speaker 1: or is seen as more valuable, then you're at a disadvantage,
Speaker 1: even if you would otherwise be pretty happy with the arrangement.
Speaker 1: So it's important to think about that aspect of it too. Anyway,
Speaker 1: as far as what to do here, I think you've
Speaker 1: got to get really clear in your own mind about
Speaker 1: exactly what the impact is on you if he doesn't
Speaker 1: do the paperwork in a timely way, if it's mainly
Speaker 1: annoying but doesn't actually have a real impact on you
Speaker 1: and your ability to do your job. I would try
Speaker 1: very hard to let that go, and believe me, I
Speaker 1: am all about being annoyed by things that are just
Speaker 1: annoying on principle but don't actually affect me. So I
Speaker 1: would get it if that was what was happening, But
Speaker 1: you would be better off forcing your brain to accept
Speaker 1: that it's not your problem to solve. But it doesn't
Speaker 1: sound like that's the case from what you're saying. It
Speaker 1: sounds like you really do need his records up to
Speaker 1: date because need access to that information. If that is correct,
Speaker 1: then that's the piece of this to focus on. Now.
Speaker 1: When you talk to him last time, it's not clear
Speaker 1: to me if you talked through why this is a
Speaker 1: problem and how it's impacting you, or if you just
Speaker 1: made the offer to take it off his plate. Form.
Speaker 1: My hunch is that you might have focused more on
Speaker 1: that second piece, just offering to do it, because that
Speaker 1: is often what people do. So I would go to
Speaker 1: him this time and say something like, you know, last
Speaker 1: year I had trouble getting information like X, Y, and
Speaker 1: Z because you aren't updating on our records very frequently,
Speaker 1: and I really want to be able to do blank.
Speaker 1: So can we agree that we'll both update at least
Speaker 1: every week or whatever? I'm just making up a time
Speaker 1: period there, but whatever makes sense. The idea is to
Speaker 1: be really clear about why it matters, what the impact
Speaker 1: is if he doesn't do it, so that it doesn't
Speaker 1: sound like you just care about paperwork for paperwork's sake.
Speaker 1: And I say that because when you're someone who is
Speaker 1: really on top of the stuff and you're nudging someone
Speaker 1: who isn't, there can be this dynamic where it starts
Speaker 1: to feel to both of you like you're just the nag.
Speaker 1: You know, you're just nagging the other person to do
Speaker 1: some pitoly thing that you only care about because you
Speaker 1: love order and you love paperwork. So the more that
Speaker 1: you can ground this in the actual impact that it's
Speaker 1: having on you or on your students, the better. And
Speaker 1: then if he agrees to that but still ends up
Speaker 1: not doing it, then you can approach him about it
Speaker 1: again at that point and again ground it in the impact.
Speaker 1: So at that point you could say something like, hey,
Speaker 1: I was looking for X piece of information yesterday and
Speaker 1: I couldn't find it. Could you get your records up
Speaker 1: to date sometime this week so that I've got access
Speaker 1: to that stuff? So again it's not do this because
Speaker 1: you're supposed to be on top of it, even though
Speaker 1: that's true, it's do this because it's causing this specific
Speaker 1: work related issue that we need to take care of.
Speaker 1: We'll do one ware break here and come right back.
Speaker 1: This next color is someone who wanted to respond to
Speaker 1: a previous episode of the show, the episode called My
Speaker 1: Boss is a Jerk to Me, where the color on
Speaker 1: that show had a boss who was really snippy with
Speaker 1: her and constantly seemed frustrated with her. The person we're
Speaker 1: about to hear from is a manager who feels like
Speaker 1: she's in that situation, but from the boss's side, she
Speaker 1: is the boss who is annoyed with her employee. Hi, Allison,
Speaker 1: I want to start by saying I just discovered this
Speaker 1: podcast and I love it. I have many questions that
Speaker 1: I will get to email into you, but I wanted
Speaker 1: to start with some feedback from the My Boss is
Speaker 1: a Jerk to the episode. While I don't condone being
Speaker 1: snappy or short with someone, I have to share that
Speaker 1: I'm sharing a sort of similar experience from the boss's side.
Speaker 1: I'm sort of a manager slash supervisor to the person
Speaker 1: who filled my last position. I've explained many times since
Speaker 1: you started, and during the interview process that the site
Speaker 1: has not done a good out of documenting job processes.
Speaker 1: But I tried documenting as much as I can while
Speaker 1: I was doing this position, which was a lot. I'm
Speaker 1: pointing her in the direction of those to learn, but
Speaker 1: also explaining things that are not documented and encouraging her
Speaker 1: to edit the script or create a new one. Take
Speaker 1: as many notes as possible so that it makes sense
Speaker 1: to you the next time you do it. Review the
Speaker 1: notes you took a day or two after you completed
Speaker 1: the tests, refer to them when something similar happens. No
Speaker 1: matter what, though, I'm getting the same exact questions about
Speaker 1: things that are simple and that I would have expected
Speaker 1: her to learn by now. One interaction that stands out
Speaker 1: to me is that after her return from a vacation day,
Speaker 1: she stopped in my office. When she got in and
Speaker 1: asked me what I wanted her to do. It wasn't
Speaker 1: the end of the month or anything where we would
Speaker 1: need to prioritize those activities. I said, she can carry
Speaker 1: on with her normal day. When she left my office,
Speaker 1: I wanted to screen It's made four months that she
Speaker 1: in here. I expect that you have working, know that
Speaker 1: you should be doing, and that you as are working professional,
Speaker 1: instructured your day around anyway, this is a moment where
Speaker 1: I could have been short with her, like the caller's boss,
Speaker 1: I just wanted to share the feedback and I look
Speaker 1: forward to asking more questions. I really appreciate this Color
Speaker 1: sharing this because I think that we don't hear enough
Speaker 1: from the manager's side of these types of interactions, and
Speaker 1: managers aren't always self aware enough to realize when they
Speaker 1: are being short with someone. So it's good that this
Speaker 1: person is spotting it. I know this Color isn't asking
Speaker 1: for advice, is she's just sharing her perspective, but I
Speaker 1: want to offer them anyway. I think as a manager,
Speaker 1: when you are at the point where you're really frustrated
Speaker 1: with an employee, and definitely when you're at the point
Speaker 1: that where you can tell that you're on the verge
Speaker 1: of snapping at someone, that's a flag to you that
Speaker 1: there's a problem that you have to address. You're the boss,
Speaker 1: after all, you say what goes and what doesn't, And
Speaker 1: in this case, it sounds like it's tie him to
Speaker 1: sit down with her and have a hard conversation. Tell
Speaker 1: her that you're concerned that she's not retaining the training
Speaker 1: that you've given her, that she's asking the same questions
Speaker 1: over and over and that she's not picking up the
Speaker 1: job as quickly as you need her to, and ask
Speaker 1: her what's going on, because who knows, there may be
Speaker 1: something she will share with you that will give you
Speaker 1: some context that you didn't have before. But either way,
Speaker 1: the important thing is to start talking about it. Let
Speaker 1: her know what you need to see her doing differently,
Speaker 1: and let her know that the issues are serious ones,
Speaker 1: and see if you can come up with a plan
Speaker 1: together for how she'll approach the work differently, and that
Speaker 1: might help, But if it doesn't help, and sometimes it won't,
Speaker 1: then you will know that you have been very upfront
Speaker 1: and straightforward and given clear feedback and that she wasn't
Speaker 1: able to make the improvements that you said you needed,
Speaker 1: And at that point you'll have enough information to conclude
Speaker 1: she's not the right person for the job and you
Speaker 1: can make a change and get someone in who is
Speaker 1: and know that you were upfront and candid with her
Speaker 1: and gave her the chance to meet those expectations. But
Speaker 1: it sounds like you're at a point where you're really frustrated,
Speaker 1: and understandably so, but that you haven't yet done this
Speaker 1: step of having the serious conversation and moving toward resolving
Speaker 1: it one way or the other. And always when you're
Speaker 1: this frustrated, it's a sign that you've got to sit
Speaker 1: down and address it, whatever it is that's going on.
Speaker 1: Sometimes managers get stuck in the part of the process
Speaker 1: where they're seeing the problems and they're frustrated by them,
Speaker 1: but they haven't moved on to the part where they
Speaker 1: talk about them. You don't want to forget that you're
Speaker 1: the manager here and you have the authority, and really,
Speaker 1: I would argue the obligation to say, hey, this isn't
Speaker 1: going the way that it needs to. Let's sit down
Speaker 1: and talk about what's happening and what I need to
Speaker 1: see you doing differently. And then if you don't see
Speaker 1: those changes, you have the ability to decide that you
Speaker 1: need to make a change. And I know that's hard
Speaker 1: to do, but it's definitely no kindness to the person,
Speaker 1: or to you or to your other employees to stay
Speaker 1: my heard in this place where you're really frustrated, with
Speaker 1: good reason for that frustration, but not to speak openly
Speaker 1: about it anyway. I know that's a lot In response
Speaker 1: to a call that was just intended as a comment
Speaker 1: on a previous episode, but I wanted to get into
Speaker 1: that a little bit because I think that type of
Speaker 1: frustration is so common as a manager, and it doesn't
Speaker 1: need to be Before we wrap up, I want to
Speaker 1: put out a call for office holiday stories. I am
Speaker 1: working on an upcoming holiday themed episode, and I want
Speaker 1: to include your stories about holidays at work. Gift exchange
Speaker 1: has gone terribly wrong, holiday party disasters, the time your
Speaker 1: boss got drunk at the Christmas potluck and passed out
Speaker 1: on the copier. Whatever funny or weird stories you have
Speaker 1: about holidays at work, I want to hear them, and
Speaker 1: also any questions that you have about holidays at work,
Speaker 1: whether or not to give your boss or your coworkers
Speaker 1: a gift, how to get out of working New Year's Eve,
Speaker 1: whether you really have to attend the office holiday party,
Speaker 1: whatever your one ring about. Send it in. There are
Speaker 1: two different ways to submit your stories and questions. You
Speaker 1: can record them on the show voicemail by calling eight
Speaker 1: five five two six work That is eight five five
Speaker 1: four two six nine six seven five, or you can
Speaker 1: record a sound file on your phone and just email
Speaker 1: it to podcast at aska manager dot org. That is
Speaker 1: it for today, Thanks for listening and I will be
Speaker 1: back next time with more questions. M