1 00:00:00,920 --> 00:00:05,160 Speaker 1: Welcome to Fitness Disrupted, a production of I Heart Radio 2 00:00:09,320 --> 00:00:12,920 Speaker 1: Welcome to Fitness Disrupted. I am Tom Holland let's talk 3 00:00:12,960 --> 00:00:18,239 Speaker 1: about kids specializing in sports at an early age. Early 4 00:00:18,800 --> 00:00:24,599 Speaker 1: sports specialization. Now, I personally have a connection to this. 5 00:00:24,720 --> 00:00:27,000 Speaker 1: I have two boys, ten and twelve. They both play 6 00:00:27,120 --> 00:00:31,360 Speaker 1: hockey at a pretty high level. So I get it. 7 00:00:32,040 --> 00:00:34,320 Speaker 1: I get it. And when we'll read you a quick 8 00:00:34,400 --> 00:00:38,360 Speaker 1: quote when you're kind of looking into the specializing at 9 00:00:38,360 --> 00:00:41,479 Speaker 1: sports at a young age, here's a quote I pulled. 10 00:00:41,520 --> 00:00:46,040 Speaker 1: Youth sports have become adult lead, professionalized and focused on winning, 11 00:00:46,720 --> 00:00:49,760 Speaker 1: which has led an increasing number of children, some as 12 00:00:49,840 --> 00:00:55,240 Speaker 1: young as seven to eight, to specialize early to better compete. 13 00:00:56,040 --> 00:00:58,480 Speaker 1: So we're gonna talk with one of the best of 14 00:00:58,520 --> 00:01:02,480 Speaker 1: the best when it comes to sports performance, Mike Boyle. 15 00:01:03,680 --> 00:01:07,600 Speaker 1: He's my guest, and he has kids as well, and 16 00:01:07,680 --> 00:01:11,680 Speaker 1: his kids a little older than mine, and they are 17 00:01:11,720 --> 00:01:17,440 Speaker 1: thriving in sports, not because he did what other coaches 18 00:01:17,959 --> 00:01:21,479 Speaker 1: and strength and conditioning coaches will tell you you need 19 00:01:21,520 --> 00:01:26,000 Speaker 1: to do. Not even close, all right, but let's put 20 00:01:26,040 --> 00:01:31,480 Speaker 1: it really simply, adults are ruining kids sports. The statistics 21 00:01:31,560 --> 00:01:34,760 Speaker 1: are overwhelming. They weren't fun to begin with. For many 22 00:01:34,840 --> 00:01:38,000 Speaker 1: kids because of the competitiveness, and and I would say 23 00:01:38,080 --> 00:01:42,760 Speaker 1: bad coaches and kids are dropping out like crazy. Thirteen 24 00:01:43,120 --> 00:01:45,680 Speaker 1: vast majority kids at age thirteen aren't playing any sports 25 00:01:45,680 --> 00:01:48,880 Speaker 1: at all, and they're just ruining it. And I see 26 00:01:48,920 --> 00:01:53,200 Speaker 1: it with my own kids ten and twelve, so competitive, 27 00:01:54,280 --> 00:01:56,680 Speaker 1: and I'm trying to pull them back. I'm trying to 28 00:01:56,720 --> 00:01:59,680 Speaker 1: do the right thing, and it's and it's challenging. As 29 00:01:59,680 --> 00:02:02,640 Speaker 1: I say almost every show, I get it, I get it, 30 00:02:03,760 --> 00:02:06,080 Speaker 1: but I'm doing a lot of things with them that 31 00:02:06,240 --> 00:02:08,840 Speaker 1: all the other kids aren't doing, even at the high level. 32 00:02:09,200 --> 00:02:11,760 Speaker 1: Because I also get it, I see the big picture. 33 00:02:12,080 --> 00:02:15,799 Speaker 1: I am so willing to lose the battles to win 34 00:02:15,840 --> 00:02:19,400 Speaker 1: the war. I am an endurance guy. All the cliches 35 00:02:19,480 --> 00:02:23,360 Speaker 1: hold true. A marathon, not a sprint. So we're gonna 36 00:02:23,400 --> 00:02:26,800 Speaker 1: talk about should kids specialize in sports at a young age. 37 00:02:27,880 --> 00:02:30,120 Speaker 1: And I know many of you have kids that do 38 00:02:30,160 --> 00:02:33,760 Speaker 1: that one sport. And you say, I'm not gonna fall behind. 39 00:02:33,840 --> 00:02:37,520 Speaker 1: Johnny is gonna be the best. Johnny's gonna play year round, 40 00:02:37,560 --> 00:02:41,200 Speaker 1: if if not almost year round, because he will fall behind. 41 00:02:41,680 --> 00:02:46,880 Speaker 1: He or she Jenny will fall behind. And they're really good, 42 00:02:46,919 --> 00:02:49,639 Speaker 1: and and it's ten thousand hours and they got to 43 00:02:49,639 --> 00:02:52,400 Speaker 1: put in the time and why wasted on other sports? 44 00:02:52,400 --> 00:02:55,320 Speaker 1: And to get good they have to play, play, play, 45 00:02:55,520 --> 00:02:59,280 Speaker 1: and guess what you have the best person to set 46 00:02:59,320 --> 00:03:02,960 Speaker 1: the record straight and why he'll tell you you're a 47 00:03:03,000 --> 00:03:06,440 Speaker 1: hundred percent wrong, and you know it's crazy and obvious. 48 00:03:06,760 --> 00:03:12,160 Speaker 1: The statistics don't support that at all. But that's not 49 00:03:12,160 --> 00:03:14,520 Speaker 1: what you're being told by your coaches if you're in 50 00:03:14,560 --> 00:03:20,320 Speaker 1: that world. But wait till you hear Mike Boyle his 51 00:03:20,400 --> 00:03:26,320 Speaker 1: take on it. Mike Boyle's strength and conditioning just guru 52 00:03:26,800 --> 00:03:31,400 Speaker 1: out of Boston, Boston Bruins, Boston Red Sox, Olympic Hockey 53 00:03:31,480 --> 00:03:36,280 Speaker 1: Soccer Collegiate, Boston University. This guy trains them all. And 54 00:03:36,920 --> 00:03:40,800 Speaker 1: he's again the only type of guests I'm gonna bring 55 00:03:40,880 --> 00:03:43,280 Speaker 1: on this show. We don't have time to waste. I'm 56 00:03:43,280 --> 00:03:45,160 Speaker 1: bringing you the people who know what they're talking about, 57 00:03:45,200 --> 00:03:48,280 Speaker 1: not only and it's always both sides of the coin, 58 00:03:48,560 --> 00:03:54,040 Speaker 1: not only from an educational perspective, but from real world. 59 00:03:54,560 --> 00:03:58,520 Speaker 1: And Mike has it on three levels education, real world, 60 00:03:58,560 --> 00:04:01,160 Speaker 1: with professional athletes and and and all of the above, 61 00:04:01,200 --> 00:04:03,960 Speaker 1: Olympic collegiate, and he's also done it with his kids, 62 00:04:04,640 --> 00:04:07,120 Speaker 1: and that is so rare. It's one thing to say, sure, 63 00:04:07,160 --> 00:04:10,160 Speaker 1: here's what you should do. Do as I say, not 64 00:04:10,240 --> 00:04:13,880 Speaker 1: as I do. But Mike actually follows the principles he's 65 00:04:13,880 --> 00:04:17,719 Speaker 1: gonna put out there. And when you specialize in sports 66 00:04:17,720 --> 00:04:20,880 Speaker 1: at a young age, a bunch of bad things happen. 67 00:04:21,600 --> 00:04:24,560 Speaker 1: You feel good, the parents feel good. Oh Johnny's you know, 68 00:04:25,080 --> 00:04:26,919 Speaker 1: his team is winning all the time. He's on quote 69 00:04:26,960 --> 00:04:29,400 Speaker 1: unquote the best team, and that feels good in the 70 00:04:29,400 --> 00:04:31,640 Speaker 1: short term. But what's Johnny gonna be doing when he's 71 00:04:31,640 --> 00:04:36,560 Speaker 1: sixteen eighteen. We're gonna talk about that enough with me. 72 00:04:37,839 --> 00:04:39,680 Speaker 1: We gotta make time, and we're gonna make a lot 73 00:04:39,680 --> 00:04:41,839 Speaker 1: of time because this is so important. I'm in the 74 00:04:41,880 --> 00:04:44,080 Speaker 1: thick of this right now. Many of you are as well, 75 00:04:44,520 --> 00:04:49,480 Speaker 1: and I love this topic. And where I live, I'm 76 00:04:49,520 --> 00:04:52,560 Speaker 1: the outlier. I'm not doing all the things that all 77 00:04:52,600 --> 00:04:55,280 Speaker 1: the other parents are doing because I know the end 78 00:04:55,279 --> 00:04:58,839 Speaker 1: game and it's not about my ego. It's about my 79 00:04:58,920 --> 00:05:01,680 Speaker 1: kids being happy and healthy and enjoying what they do. 80 00:05:01,760 --> 00:05:04,680 Speaker 1: And guess what, those things are not mutually exclusive, As 81 00:05:04,720 --> 00:05:07,480 Speaker 1: so many coaches will tell, you can't be happy and 82 00:05:07,480 --> 00:05:11,360 Speaker 1: you need to do more to succeed not true. When 83 00:05:11,360 --> 00:05:14,440 Speaker 1: we come back from the break, Holy smokes. Kids in 84 00:05:14,520 --> 00:05:19,680 Speaker 1: sports from the pre eminent expert on the topic, strength 85 00:05:19,720 --> 00:05:22,839 Speaker 1: and conditioning coach, one of the best in the world, 86 00:05:23,440 --> 00:05:27,360 Speaker 1: Mike Boyle out of Boston. He's gonna tell you if 87 00:05:27,400 --> 00:05:31,040 Speaker 1: you have kids and you want them to be happy 88 00:05:31,120 --> 00:05:34,360 Speaker 1: and play sports and enjoy it and be really good 89 00:05:34,400 --> 00:05:37,400 Speaker 1: at it. If you want all of those things, he's 90 00:05:37,400 --> 00:05:40,240 Speaker 1: the guy to listen to. Mike Boyle. We come back, 91 00:05:48,680 --> 00:05:51,719 Speaker 1: all right. Could not be more excited interviewing Mike Boyle. 92 00:05:52,200 --> 00:05:54,120 Speaker 1: And this is the guy. If you don't know who 93 00:05:54,120 --> 00:05:55,720 Speaker 1: he is, let me give you his quick bio. And 94 00:05:55,960 --> 00:05:58,880 Speaker 1: he's an internationally recognized strength and conditioning expert. He's got 95 00:05:58,920 --> 00:06:01,520 Speaker 1: like well over thirty years experience in the industry, and 96 00:06:01,560 --> 00:06:03,599 Speaker 1: he trains the best of the best. All right. Uh. 97 00:06:03,600 --> 00:06:06,039 Speaker 1: He brings a depth and breadth of knowledge that's unmatched 98 00:06:06,040 --> 00:06:09,040 Speaker 1: in sports performance training. This guy knows how to train 99 00:06:09,600 --> 00:06:11,760 Speaker 1: the top athletes. But he does it with real people too. 100 00:06:11,800 --> 00:06:14,279 Speaker 1: And it's always weird to say real people. Um, you 101 00:06:14,320 --> 00:06:17,000 Speaker 1: know his client list is is everybody in Boston who 102 00:06:17,320 --> 00:06:19,359 Speaker 1: wants to train with the best. They basically go to 103 00:06:19,400 --> 00:06:22,800 Speaker 1: Mike all Right and his Jim Mike Boyle Strength and Conditioning. 104 00:06:23,160 --> 00:06:26,040 Speaker 1: You know, one of the most comprehensive performance training places 105 00:06:26,040 --> 00:06:27,960 Speaker 1: in the in the world, I would say, And it 106 00:06:28,040 --> 00:06:30,120 Speaker 1: was voted the number one gym in America by Men's 107 00:06:30,120 --> 00:06:33,080 Speaker 1: Health magazine. He's got books, he's got DVDs. Listen. If 108 00:06:33,080 --> 00:06:35,360 Speaker 1: you're a fitness person and you don't know of Mike, 109 00:06:35,400 --> 00:06:37,920 Speaker 1: you're not doing your homework. And if you're someone who 110 00:06:38,000 --> 00:06:40,599 Speaker 1: is into just getting the most out of your workouts 111 00:06:40,600 --> 00:06:43,160 Speaker 1: in your health and who isn't, go to strength coach 112 00:06:43,240 --> 00:06:46,440 Speaker 1: dot com the greatest resource, I would argue, for just 113 00:06:46,520 --> 00:06:49,880 Speaker 1: the latest exercise science on the stuff that you're reading 114 00:06:49,920 --> 00:06:51,880 Speaker 1: about from people who don't know what they're talking about. 115 00:06:52,000 --> 00:06:54,680 Speaker 1: Mike clarifies all that stuff on that site. And he's 116 00:06:54,680 --> 00:06:58,279 Speaker 1: got a book, Functional Training for Sports, the two editions awesome. Again, 117 00:06:58,320 --> 00:07:00,240 Speaker 1: if you're a fitness person, you need to have in 118 00:07:00,279 --> 00:07:03,200 Speaker 1: your library. And so what I want to talk about today, 119 00:07:03,240 --> 00:07:07,360 Speaker 1: Mike is sports specialization at a young age, something we 120 00:07:07,440 --> 00:07:10,000 Speaker 1: both have a little bit of experience with Right personally 121 00:07:10,000 --> 00:07:13,800 Speaker 1: as well as professionally. Yes, I always said skinning the 122 00:07:13,840 --> 00:07:16,200 Speaker 1: game in this one. Yeah, and and so you have 123 00:07:16,240 --> 00:07:18,880 Speaker 1: two kids, is that right, my kids. Yeah, I have 124 00:07:19,000 --> 00:07:24,160 Speaker 1: daughter who is uh, she's a red shirt sophomore at 125 00:07:24,240 --> 00:07:27,720 Speaker 1: Robert Morris University and she right now I think is 126 00:07:28,000 --> 00:07:30,120 Speaker 1: I think she's twelfth of the nation and goals in 127 00:07:30,200 --> 00:07:33,080 Speaker 1: Division one. Wow. Good to have you as a dad. 128 00:07:34,280 --> 00:07:36,000 Speaker 1: Doesn't hurt, right, But she had to put the work in, 129 00:07:36,120 --> 00:07:38,040 Speaker 1: so let me. I just want to start with this 130 00:07:38,080 --> 00:07:41,480 Speaker 1: because I have two boys, Mike ten and thirteen, my major, 131 00:07:41,520 --> 00:07:43,600 Speaker 1: and they both play hockey and they actually are doing 132 00:07:43,600 --> 00:07:46,040 Speaker 1: a lot of the the stuff, stupid stuff I can't 133 00:07:46,080 --> 00:07:47,920 Speaker 1: control because I have a hockey wife who's a total 134 00:07:47,960 --> 00:07:50,840 Speaker 1: won and that's that's a real problem for me. She 135 00:07:51,000 --> 00:07:53,560 Speaker 1: loves it to no end. Uh, we'll talk about that. 136 00:07:54,320 --> 00:07:56,520 Speaker 1: Hopefully she won't listen to this show. But what I 137 00:07:56,600 --> 00:07:59,760 Speaker 1: pulled from your site strength coach dot com is and 138 00:08:00,320 --> 00:08:03,040 Speaker 1: I would say, of this industry and kid sports in particular, 139 00:08:03,440 --> 00:08:05,880 Speaker 1: here's an email from a coach. Okay, and this is 140 00:08:06,000 --> 00:08:08,400 Speaker 1: advice for a seven year old. Remember that it's a 141 00:08:08,440 --> 00:08:10,400 Speaker 1: seven year old, people, and this is from a coach. 142 00:08:10,680 --> 00:08:12,960 Speaker 1: A lot of parents have asked me what their child 143 00:08:13,000 --> 00:08:15,480 Speaker 1: can do to become a better player. It starts in 144 00:08:15,480 --> 00:08:18,600 Speaker 1: the spring. In the summer, hockey is a twelve month sport. 145 00:08:18,920 --> 00:08:21,200 Speaker 1: If you put the bag away, I can guarantee you 146 00:08:21,480 --> 00:08:23,920 Speaker 1: to expect being at the bottom level of whatever team 147 00:08:23,960 --> 00:08:27,240 Speaker 1: your child makes next year. Kids get better by playing more. 148 00:08:27,600 --> 00:08:30,080 Speaker 1: If anyone tells you otherwise, they do not know the game. 149 00:08:30,280 --> 00:08:32,400 Speaker 1: I'm proud to be a part of program that offers 150 00:08:32,440 --> 00:08:34,800 Speaker 1: as many opportunities as this one does to have your 151 00:08:34,880 --> 00:08:38,800 Speaker 1: child on the ice as much as possible. What do 152 00:08:38,800 --> 00:08:42,800 Speaker 1: we think about that, Mike, Absolutely one to complete lie 153 00:08:43,360 --> 00:08:47,880 Speaker 1: and not based on any fact at all. So that's 154 00:08:47,920 --> 00:08:49,760 Speaker 1: the biggest thing when we look at this. One of 155 00:08:49,760 --> 00:08:51,640 Speaker 1: the things that I've been saying to day. You know, 156 00:08:52,000 --> 00:08:54,720 Speaker 1: I've been banging this drum now for going on twenty years. 157 00:08:55,440 --> 00:08:57,680 Speaker 1: And as I said, I went through with my daughter. 158 00:08:57,720 --> 00:09:01,520 Speaker 1: My daughter had a full scholarship at fifteen to Clarkson, 159 00:09:02,080 --> 00:09:05,960 Speaker 1: which was the at that time defending national champion. Won 160 00:09:05,960 --> 00:09:09,240 Speaker 1: the national championship at Clarkson her freshman year as a 161 00:09:09,280 --> 00:09:13,839 Speaker 1: through eighteen year old. So and she played soccer until 162 00:09:13,880 --> 00:09:15,959 Speaker 1: she was fifteen. I made her player last year a 163 00:09:16,040 --> 00:09:20,920 Speaker 1: view fifteen soccer and every summer she she's done judo, 164 00:09:21,240 --> 00:09:23,640 Speaker 1: she did swimming and diving. She actually was like the 165 00:09:23,760 --> 00:09:26,800 Speaker 1: U twelve diving champion of our little country club league 166 00:09:26,840 --> 00:09:30,360 Speaker 1: that we had in something. And every year people would 167 00:09:30,360 --> 00:09:32,120 Speaker 1: say that, oh, you know, she's not gonna play the summer, 168 00:09:32,160 --> 00:09:33,960 Speaker 1: she's gonna fall behind, and I was like, I don't 169 00:09:34,000 --> 00:09:37,280 Speaker 1: think so. And every September would come around and she'd 170 00:09:37,320 --> 00:09:39,679 Speaker 1: still be the best player, and that it was that 171 00:09:39,720 --> 00:09:43,160 Speaker 1: way every year, and every she would cry about not 172 00:09:43,200 --> 00:09:45,280 Speaker 1: being able to go to summer tournaments and why can't 173 00:09:45,280 --> 00:09:47,200 Speaker 1: I play in the summer. Why don't you let me 174 00:09:47,280 --> 00:09:51,160 Speaker 1: do this? And I always I said, because what all 175 00:09:51,200 --> 00:09:54,000 Speaker 1: these people are telling you just isn't true. That it's 176 00:09:54,080 --> 00:09:56,880 Speaker 1: not There is not a relationship of more being better. 177 00:09:56,920 --> 00:09:59,480 Speaker 1: There is a relationship of being a good athlete and 178 00:09:59,559 --> 00:10:02,120 Speaker 1: being better. And I think that's the part that people miss. 179 00:10:02,520 --> 00:10:04,400 Speaker 1: I don't think you should not play sports, but I 180 00:10:04,400 --> 00:10:07,000 Speaker 1: feel like young kids should play as many as they can. 181 00:10:07,760 --> 00:10:10,240 Speaker 1: So you're you know, you said at an eleven year old, 182 00:10:10,360 --> 00:10:11,840 Speaker 1: you know, you're eleven year old should be in three 183 00:10:11,920 --> 00:10:15,000 Speaker 1: or four sports. I think when when you do get 184 00:10:15,000 --> 00:10:18,240 Speaker 1: to the point where you want to be a college player, 185 00:10:18,600 --> 00:10:21,640 Speaker 1: you may need to specialize. But that specialization is probably 186 00:10:21,640 --> 00:10:26,000 Speaker 1: gonna come at like ages fifteen, sixteen, seventeen, not at 187 00:10:26,080 --> 00:10:30,640 Speaker 1: ages seven. And that's the problem that we're running into now, 188 00:10:30,760 --> 00:10:34,600 Speaker 1: is that people are telling people who've never done this, 189 00:10:34,640 --> 00:10:37,080 Speaker 1: but in their lives are telling people how to do it. 190 00:10:37,360 --> 00:10:39,200 Speaker 1: And I look at and think, I have kids that 191 00:10:39,240 --> 00:10:42,360 Speaker 1: I've seen come to me at twelve years old become 192 00:10:43,040 --> 00:10:44,880 Speaker 1: NHL players. They have a really good picture of two 193 00:10:44,880 --> 00:10:47,080 Speaker 1: of our twelve year old who are just getting ready 194 00:10:47,080 --> 00:10:49,679 Speaker 1: to retire. One kid is I believe he's thirty two. 195 00:10:49,760 --> 00:10:51,480 Speaker 1: He's been training with me for almost twenty years, and 196 00:10:52,480 --> 00:10:56,080 Speaker 1: it was captain at Boston University. Probably played, he played 197 00:10:56,080 --> 00:10:58,680 Speaker 1: a decent number of games in the NHL, is now 198 00:10:58,679 --> 00:11:00,560 Speaker 1: in the h L again, finished out his career in 199 00:11:00,559 --> 00:11:02,560 Speaker 1: the NHL, and other guys in Europe finishing out his 200 00:11:02,600 --> 00:11:05,719 Speaker 1: career played Probably he's the other kid, probably played four 201 00:11:05,800 --> 00:11:08,719 Speaker 1: or NHL games played at the University of Name, was 202 00:11:08,800 --> 00:11:11,360 Speaker 1: captain University of Naming. I saw these kids start at 203 00:11:11,360 --> 00:11:15,320 Speaker 1: twelve and become pros. And the people that are giving 204 00:11:15,320 --> 00:11:19,199 Speaker 1: out the advice, I would be willing to bet strongly 205 00:11:19,520 --> 00:11:22,360 Speaker 1: that they do not have one of these people on 206 00:11:22,400 --> 00:11:24,400 Speaker 1: their resume that they can look at and say, yes, 207 00:11:24,440 --> 00:11:27,160 Speaker 1: I gave this kid, this advice play as much as 208 00:11:27,160 --> 00:11:30,160 Speaker 1: you possibly could, as often as you possibly could, and 209 00:11:30,240 --> 00:11:33,640 Speaker 1: that kid became an NHL player. Yeah, and and and 210 00:11:33,679 --> 00:11:36,240 Speaker 1: that's that's a huge part of it, right, Mike, is 211 00:11:36,280 --> 00:11:40,319 Speaker 1: that the people that they didn't play, they're not fitness people. Um. 212 00:11:40,480 --> 00:11:45,080 Speaker 1: And is part of it the ten thou hours, Malcolm Gladwell, 213 00:11:45,120 --> 00:11:47,720 Speaker 1: you know, oh yeah, you gotta start really young. And 214 00:11:48,160 --> 00:11:50,160 Speaker 1: I knew a guy, Mike who made his kid. His 215 00:11:50,200 --> 00:11:53,320 Speaker 1: kid was shooting two thousand pucks a day. Yeah. Well, 216 00:11:53,400 --> 00:11:55,959 Speaker 1: I think part of it is we misunderstand. Sports Team 217 00:11:56,080 --> 00:11:59,000 Speaker 1: is a really good book for people to read. David 218 00:11:59,000 --> 00:12:02,640 Speaker 1: Epstein goes into out of detail about Anderson's research and 219 00:12:02,679 --> 00:12:05,160 Speaker 1: about Gladwell's book and about a lot of that stuff. 220 00:12:05,480 --> 00:12:10,360 Speaker 1: And what I tell people is that soccer, lacrosse, gymnastics, 221 00:12:10,559 --> 00:12:12,720 Speaker 1: all these things are part of the ten thousand hours 222 00:12:12,920 --> 00:12:16,400 Speaker 1: for developing an athlete. You don't want ten thousand hours 223 00:12:16,400 --> 00:12:18,880 Speaker 1: of hockey, you want to build it. I always said, 224 00:12:18,880 --> 00:12:21,000 Speaker 1: you want to build a pyramid, and the base of 225 00:12:21,080 --> 00:12:23,880 Speaker 1: that pyramid is a base of athleticism. So you want 226 00:12:23,880 --> 00:12:25,760 Speaker 1: a kid. It's really interesting. People would always watch my 227 00:12:25,880 --> 00:12:28,320 Speaker 1: daughter play and say she picks up Puck's great in 228 00:12:28,360 --> 00:12:31,040 Speaker 1: her skates. She's really good with the seat. And I'm like, yeah, 229 00:12:31,120 --> 00:12:33,600 Speaker 1: she's a good soccer player. You understand sr to use 230 00:12:33,640 --> 00:12:35,520 Speaker 1: your feet. You know your kid is gonna play soccer. 231 00:12:36,080 --> 00:12:37,360 Speaker 1: You know, if it doesn't hit him in the stick, 232 00:12:37,360 --> 00:12:40,040 Speaker 1: he's in trouble. But you know my daughter, if it 233 00:12:40,080 --> 00:12:41,800 Speaker 1: hits her in the skate, she kicks it under a stick. 234 00:12:42,320 --> 00:12:44,720 Speaker 1: And people would look and they say, oh, she's really strong, 235 00:12:44,760 --> 00:12:46,840 Speaker 1: and I'm like yeah, because she loves weights and you 236 00:12:46,880 --> 00:12:49,160 Speaker 1: know what I mean. It's like all these things that's 237 00:12:49,160 --> 00:12:53,160 Speaker 1: all part of the ten thousand hours. But I always think, 238 00:12:53,200 --> 00:12:56,040 Speaker 1: and this is what I saying, we as adults, we 239 00:12:56,080 --> 00:12:59,480 Speaker 1: apply adult values to youth activities because, for I said, 240 00:12:59,520 --> 00:13:02,040 Speaker 1: for most people, if you're a doctor, or you're a lawyer, 241 00:13:02,120 --> 00:13:05,560 Speaker 1: or your account or whatever it is you specialize, you 242 00:13:05,600 --> 00:13:08,800 Speaker 1: don't look and say, I'm thinking about being a doctor, lawyer, accountant. 243 00:13:09,440 --> 00:13:10,920 Speaker 1: You think about I'm going to be one of those 244 00:13:11,480 --> 00:13:13,400 Speaker 1: and then I'm gonna study everything there is to know 245 00:13:13,440 --> 00:13:16,720 Speaker 1: about that, which again from my NHL clients, that's what 246 00:13:16,720 --> 00:13:19,079 Speaker 1: they do. And I'm hockey played. This is what I do. Okay, 247 00:13:19,200 --> 00:13:22,200 Speaker 1: I got it. I understand that but that doesn't apply 248 00:13:22,920 --> 00:13:25,880 Speaker 1: at seven or eight years old. And that's the problem now, 249 00:13:25,960 --> 00:13:28,800 Speaker 1: is that we have adults applying what works for us 250 00:13:29,480 --> 00:13:33,240 Speaker 1: to their children, assuming that it's the same process, and 251 00:13:33,280 --> 00:13:35,400 Speaker 1: it's not. And it's it's so well put, and I 252 00:13:35,440 --> 00:13:37,520 Speaker 1: love that. Like the ten tho hours, everybody, if you 253 00:13:37,559 --> 00:13:40,960 Speaker 1: didn't hear that, it's not one sport. It's ten thousand 254 00:13:41,000 --> 00:13:44,319 Speaker 1: hours of of strength training, of free play that we're 255 00:13:44,320 --> 00:13:46,120 Speaker 1: gonna talk about of playing a bunch of sports. My 256 00:13:46,160 --> 00:13:49,120 Speaker 1: kids actually do, like their their lacrosse and soccer and 257 00:13:49,120 --> 00:13:51,040 Speaker 1: and swimming and all those things too. And I remember 258 00:13:51,040 --> 00:13:53,480 Speaker 1: when they first started playing lacrosse, the coach was like, wow, 259 00:13:53,480 --> 00:13:55,360 Speaker 1: these kids are hockey players, aren't they right, And it 260 00:13:55,520 --> 00:13:57,199 Speaker 1: was they were doing certain things and then they picked 261 00:13:57,280 --> 00:13:59,280 Speaker 1: up stuff and then the next season they played hockey. 262 00:13:59,320 --> 00:14:02,400 Speaker 1: They had skills from lacrosse body positioning and things like 263 00:14:02,440 --> 00:14:04,839 Speaker 1: that that were so helpful and across the board. So 264 00:14:05,240 --> 00:14:07,640 Speaker 1: the ten thousand hours, as as Mike just talked about, 265 00:14:07,800 --> 00:14:11,480 Speaker 1: is not sports specialization. And there's a movie, so you 266 00:14:11,600 --> 00:14:13,640 Speaker 1: got to read that book everyone, if you're really into this. 267 00:14:13,720 --> 00:14:16,480 Speaker 1: The sports gene is just awesome. And he is also, 268 00:14:16,520 --> 00:14:19,520 Speaker 1: by the way, Mike in that documentary that if you're 269 00:14:19,520 --> 00:14:21,800 Speaker 1: into this, in Search of Greatness, so he's all over 270 00:14:21,800 --> 00:14:25,000 Speaker 1: that Epstein is as well, and the In Search of Greatness, 271 00:14:25,000 --> 00:14:27,600 Speaker 1: if You're into this is a documentary by a Yale 272 00:14:27,640 --> 00:14:29,480 Speaker 1: hockey guy who actually didn't do that well, Mike, which 273 00:14:29,520 --> 00:14:31,400 Speaker 1: is so interesting and he didn't even have kids when 274 00:14:31,440 --> 00:14:34,760 Speaker 1: he did it. It's really interesting documentary. And he interviews 275 00:14:34,760 --> 00:14:39,120 Speaker 1: Wayne Gretzky and Jerry Rice and Pelee and the takeaway 276 00:14:39,320 --> 00:14:42,040 Speaker 1: is is pretty obvious and it's about what we're talking 277 00:14:42,080 --> 00:14:44,520 Speaker 1: about here. And one really cool thing Mike is he 278 00:14:44,560 --> 00:14:46,840 Speaker 1: actually said and they he let the cameras roll like 279 00:14:47,080 --> 00:14:50,880 Speaker 1: way longer than the normal documentary filmmakers, and at one 280 00:14:50,880 --> 00:14:52,680 Speaker 1: point he asks Wayne Gretzky, he said, you want the 281 00:14:52,800 --> 00:14:55,200 Speaker 1: questions up front. Most people do like, let let me 282 00:14:55,240 --> 00:14:56,800 Speaker 1: ask what are the questions you're gonna ask me? And 283 00:14:56,800 --> 00:14:59,600 Speaker 1: Wayne Gretzky said no, And his takeaway was, you know 284 00:14:59,680 --> 00:15:01,720 Speaker 1: that when Griski wanted to be able to react, to 285 00:15:01,880 --> 00:15:04,600 Speaker 1: just be natural and be in the moment, and that's 286 00:15:04,640 --> 00:15:06,840 Speaker 1: what people don't do. And that's what playing a bunch 287 00:15:06,880 --> 00:15:09,480 Speaker 1: of sports that is one of the things you learned, right, 288 00:15:09,880 --> 00:15:13,280 Speaker 1: is just reaction. You don't need all the answers right away, 289 00:15:13,560 --> 00:15:16,880 Speaker 1: four questions, and yeah, there's so much to it, Like 290 00:15:16,880 --> 00:15:18,880 Speaker 1: I said, you know with Gretzky. With Gretzky, there was 291 00:15:18,880 --> 00:15:22,440 Speaker 1: a huge amount of time spent by himself on the 292 00:15:22,960 --> 00:15:25,200 Speaker 1: and he was not He did not come from money 293 00:15:25,480 --> 00:15:28,040 Speaker 1: they had, you know, they had to budget for skates 294 00:15:28,120 --> 00:15:30,560 Speaker 1: and for sis and he didn't travel all over the 295 00:15:30,560 --> 00:15:33,760 Speaker 1: place to tournaments. I've read a lot about about in 296 00:15:33,760 --> 00:15:37,680 Speaker 1: that particular situation. And you just realized, as you said, 297 00:15:37,680 --> 00:15:40,600 Speaker 1: I have another friend, um Jamie Monroe, who's a really 298 00:15:40,600 --> 00:15:43,000 Speaker 1: good lacrosse coach who has started the program at Denver, 299 00:15:43,360 --> 00:15:45,800 Speaker 1: and he's a huge proponent of just what you said, 300 00:15:45,880 --> 00:15:48,600 Speaker 1: the free play idea we need. And this goes into 301 00:15:48,600 --> 00:15:50,560 Speaker 1: another really book, good book, Genius and all of Us. 302 00:15:51,080 --> 00:15:53,520 Speaker 1: Um Shank wrote Genius and all of Us and Genius 303 00:15:53,520 --> 00:15:54,560 Speaker 1: and all of Us. One of the things he talked 304 00:15:54,560 --> 00:15:57,120 Speaker 1: about is one of the things that's really important for 305 00:15:57,120 --> 00:16:01,600 Speaker 1: a kid to be successful, passion. Keith has to like 306 00:16:01,640 --> 00:16:03,040 Speaker 1: I always one of the the thinks someone said to me, 307 00:16:03,360 --> 00:16:05,440 Speaker 1: what's the number one thing you can teach your kids? 308 00:16:05,880 --> 00:16:10,160 Speaker 1: And I told him to like practice, because you gotta 309 00:16:10,200 --> 00:16:12,600 Speaker 1: like to practice. My kids love. My kids like to 310 00:16:12,600 --> 00:16:14,840 Speaker 1: go to practice. They don't miss practice. They will tend 311 00:16:14,880 --> 00:16:16,680 Speaker 1: to go to extra practices. Again, my daughter and I 312 00:16:16,800 --> 00:16:18,680 Speaker 1: got to talk about my kids law because I'm product her. 313 00:16:19,120 --> 00:16:21,080 Speaker 1: My daughter would generally go like she'd go to her 314 00:16:21,080 --> 00:16:23,960 Speaker 1: skill sessions and she'd go to one and then she'd 315 00:16:23,960 --> 00:16:25,320 Speaker 1: stay for the next one. She was like, I'm gonna 316 00:16:25,320 --> 00:16:27,320 Speaker 1: go to you fourteen skills and then I'm gonna stay 317 00:16:27,320 --> 00:16:30,280 Speaker 1: and do the U sixteen one. I'd like, fine, you know, 318 00:16:30,320 --> 00:16:32,920 Speaker 1: I never told her, I think you should stay and 319 00:16:32,960 --> 00:16:35,120 Speaker 1: do the U sixteen ones. And she'd go to the 320 00:16:35,200 --> 00:16:37,200 Speaker 1: rink and hang around, and if no one had players, 321 00:16:37,280 --> 00:16:39,960 Speaker 1: she played. He'd be like, yeah, I think the U 322 00:16:40,080 --> 00:16:42,760 Speaker 1: nineteens aren't gonna have enough players, and they'll let me play. 323 00:16:43,120 --> 00:16:45,160 Speaker 1: It was twelve she was playing in the U nineteen games. 324 00:16:45,200 --> 00:16:47,440 Speaker 1: Because she'd be hanging around and she'd be like, you know, 325 00:16:47,480 --> 00:16:49,680 Speaker 1: people like, oh, we only have two lines, and she's like, 326 00:16:49,680 --> 00:16:52,080 Speaker 1: I'll let and they let her play in the U 327 00:16:52,120 --> 00:16:55,120 Speaker 1: nineteen games. She played, I mean, and it's terrible some weekends, 328 00:16:55,240 --> 00:16:58,320 Speaker 1: you know, some Sundays she played five games because she 329 00:16:58,480 --> 00:17:00,400 Speaker 1: just stay at the rink and to be like, you know, 330 00:17:00,440 --> 00:17:02,720 Speaker 1: it's almost like our old pickup basketball days when we 331 00:17:02,720 --> 00:17:04,119 Speaker 1: were kids. We'd go to Parker and play pick up 332 00:17:04,160 --> 00:17:07,480 Speaker 1: basketball all day. My daughter would go play pick up hockey, 333 00:17:07,640 --> 00:17:09,520 Speaker 1: except it wasn't. She just look around and she'd be 334 00:17:09,600 --> 00:17:12,959 Speaker 1: like teams, you know, who needs players. Narrow was like, oh, 335 00:17:12,960 --> 00:17:14,720 Speaker 1: there's a good little kid. It's a good you twelve kid. 336 00:17:14,960 --> 00:17:17,399 Speaker 1: You know she'll be able to she'll fit in. And 337 00:17:17,440 --> 00:17:20,919 Speaker 1: she played all day because she wanted to, because you know, 338 00:17:20,960 --> 00:17:23,600 Speaker 1: she wasn't getting pushed to never because I wanted her to. 339 00:17:24,040 --> 00:17:26,000 Speaker 1: And I would be tough like I was always other 340 00:17:26,080 --> 00:17:28,720 Speaker 1: thing to be honest, don't bull smoke up your kids, 341 00:17:28,720 --> 00:17:30,800 Speaker 1: asked right now, right now? A word we sho. My 342 00:17:30,840 --> 00:17:33,320 Speaker 1: daughter's always said with me. Yeah, I like the fact 343 00:17:33,320 --> 00:17:35,040 Speaker 1: that you're honest. She said. The other parents aren't honest. 344 00:17:35,119 --> 00:17:38,000 Speaker 1: They they don't they lie and uh, And I said no, 345 00:17:38,040 --> 00:17:39,320 Speaker 1: I'll always tell you the truth. You know. Do you 346 00:17:39,359 --> 00:17:41,280 Speaker 1: ask me if you played well, I'll tell you yes, 347 00:17:41,359 --> 00:17:44,200 Speaker 1: no or in tween and so you know, the kids 348 00:17:44,640 --> 00:17:47,240 Speaker 1: they like to practice. They get honest feedback about whether 349 00:17:47,240 --> 00:17:48,840 Speaker 1: they were good or bad. I get and I always 350 00:17:48,840 --> 00:17:50,560 Speaker 1: tell them all I care about his effort. I'd said 351 00:17:50,560 --> 00:17:52,440 Speaker 1: the same thing, you know, I'd never goals and assist 352 00:17:52,640 --> 00:17:55,600 Speaker 1: care less effort, care about you know. It's even like 353 00:17:55,640 --> 00:17:57,560 Speaker 1: my son now is turning into a better cross player 354 00:17:58,040 --> 00:18:01,880 Speaker 1: then he is a hockey player, and he's good at both, 355 00:18:01,920 --> 00:18:04,440 Speaker 1: but he's better at lacrosse. But I always don't. All 356 00:18:04,480 --> 00:18:07,720 Speaker 1: I care about is, you know, go to practice, dry hard, 357 00:18:08,560 --> 00:18:11,280 Speaker 1: everything else take care of itself. Yeah, and so you'll 358 00:18:11,280 --> 00:18:13,639 Speaker 1: appreciate and understand. And you've been doing this for a 359 00:18:13,680 --> 00:18:15,240 Speaker 1: really long time. We just got so I do have 360 00:18:15,280 --> 00:18:17,720 Speaker 1: the two boys talked about who play hockey, and they 361 00:18:17,720 --> 00:18:20,359 Speaker 1: do go to Canada. And we were just in Canada 362 00:18:20,400 --> 00:18:22,880 Speaker 1: recently and got blown at. So is my second son. 363 00:18:22,920 --> 00:18:25,160 Speaker 1: Now I've gone through with my first, and so this 364 00:18:25,200 --> 00:18:27,960 Speaker 1: one is ten and we got blown out, and all 365 00:18:28,000 --> 00:18:30,560 Speaker 1: the pairs are really angry, Mike, and I'm like really happy, 366 00:18:30,680 --> 00:18:33,000 Speaker 1: and they're like, why are you like, we're coming up 367 00:18:33,040 --> 00:18:36,080 Speaker 1: here to play the best of the best. We're coming 368 00:18:36,160 --> 00:18:38,200 Speaker 1: up here. You know, I'm spending a lot of money 369 00:18:38,240 --> 00:18:40,120 Speaker 1: in a lot of time. And truthfully, Mike, you how 370 00:18:40,119 --> 00:18:41,920 Speaker 1: many times I've gone up there with the older son 371 00:18:41,960 --> 00:18:44,679 Speaker 1: and we end up playing teams from Massachusetts and like, 372 00:18:44,760 --> 00:18:47,400 Speaker 1: why are we here? We're playing the team from New 373 00:18:47,480 --> 00:18:49,600 Speaker 1: Jersey that we could have played at home and save 374 00:18:49,720 --> 00:18:53,000 Speaker 1: two grand But again, like I don't care about the scores. 375 00:18:53,119 --> 00:18:55,840 Speaker 1: I don't. I want my kids to play hard, play 376 00:18:55,880 --> 00:18:58,960 Speaker 1: against some really good talent and learn right. I don't 377 00:18:59,000 --> 00:19:03,119 Speaker 1: care about the scores. No, obviously like that, you know that. 378 00:19:03,160 --> 00:19:05,119 Speaker 1: I get the same thing, the same reaction from parents. 379 00:19:05,400 --> 00:19:06,720 Speaker 1: I want the games to be close, Like I don't 380 00:19:06,720 --> 00:19:07,720 Speaker 1: want to go to some place. I don't want to 381 00:19:07,760 --> 00:19:09,200 Speaker 1: pay money to go get blown up. Like we never 382 00:19:09,240 --> 00:19:11,080 Speaker 1: did that. My daughter did the candid thing when you 383 00:19:11,160 --> 00:19:13,920 Speaker 1: get older. She was playing for a girl's junior team 384 00:19:13,920 --> 00:19:16,240 Speaker 1: and most of the good competition was in Canada. But 385 00:19:16,359 --> 00:19:17,960 Speaker 1: you know, when the kids, we go to Lake Classic 386 00:19:18,000 --> 00:19:20,000 Speaker 1: once a year, to one of those tournaments for the 387 00:19:20,080 --> 00:19:22,080 Speaker 1: kids to have fund. But I saw have friends who's 388 00:19:22,080 --> 00:19:24,320 Speaker 1: the same thing. Like when someone said, you know, you know, 389 00:19:24,359 --> 00:19:26,040 Speaker 1: if you want to go, you want to put market 390 00:19:26,040 --> 00:19:27,960 Speaker 1: on a team, We're gonna go up and play, you know, 391 00:19:27,960 --> 00:19:29,560 Speaker 1: in some tournament in Quebeca, I'm like, do you what 392 00:19:29,600 --> 00:19:33,840 Speaker 1: do you mind? Possibly? Because the other thing, though, is 393 00:19:33,880 --> 00:19:37,800 Speaker 1: that's what I said. We're complicit because we don't say no, right, 394 00:19:37,800 --> 00:19:40,639 Speaker 1: where we are that the problem. Another great book, Inside 395 00:19:40,640 --> 00:19:43,920 Speaker 1: of Coaching, Joe Rman calls parenting the most competitive sport 396 00:19:43,920 --> 00:19:47,320 Speaker 1: in America. And and if you're in then I'm gonna 397 00:19:47,359 --> 00:19:50,359 Speaker 1: bet you're in one of those higher income southern Connecticut communities. 398 00:19:50,560 --> 00:19:53,439 Speaker 1: You know, in that probably you're probably in Fairfield County. 399 00:19:53,720 --> 00:19:55,719 Speaker 1: And again I won't name names, but I could tell 400 00:19:55,760 --> 00:20:00,000 Speaker 1: you exactly where you live. You're with a bunch of 401 00:20:00,119 --> 00:20:03,080 Speaker 1: type A hyper competitive parents who you know, my it's 402 00:20:03,359 --> 00:20:05,000 Speaker 1: you know, my kids gotta have the best, gotta be 403 00:20:05,040 --> 00:20:06,960 Speaker 1: against the best. Now you've got kids were freaking four 404 00:20:07,000 --> 00:20:08,880 Speaker 1: in a doll sticks. You know, you can't even bend 405 00:20:08,960 --> 00:20:14,080 Speaker 1: them and uh, they could be using wood and um, 406 00:20:14,119 --> 00:20:17,520 Speaker 1: you know, it's crazy. Like we kept our kids. My 407 00:20:17,720 --> 00:20:20,680 Speaker 1: daughter stayed in town hockey till she played boys town 408 00:20:20,720 --> 00:20:24,880 Speaker 1: hockey until she was eleven, right and um, and then 409 00:20:24,920 --> 00:20:26,159 Speaker 1: at twelve she was like, I want to play for 410 00:20:26,200 --> 00:20:27,920 Speaker 1: a girl's team. We took her. Everybody's like take her. 411 00:20:28,080 --> 00:20:29,920 Speaker 1: You know, they named off the top five teams and 412 00:20:29,960 --> 00:20:31,840 Speaker 1: I was like, I have to drive too far to 413 00:20:31,920 --> 00:20:36,640 Speaker 1: go to there's a fifteen minutes from here. It's gonna 414 00:20:36,640 --> 00:20:38,120 Speaker 1: play to the Islands, and they were like, oh, they're 415 00:20:38,119 --> 00:20:40,960 Speaker 1: not very good. I'm like, I don't care. She's fine, 416 00:20:41,080 --> 00:20:43,800 Speaker 1: she'll she'll do Okay, it won't make any difference. And 417 00:20:44,760 --> 00:20:46,320 Speaker 1: they gotta be on the best team. They've got to 418 00:20:46,320 --> 00:20:49,080 Speaker 1: play the best competition. It's all bullshit, excuse my language, 419 00:20:49,119 --> 00:20:54,760 Speaker 1: but all so incredibly unimportant and in reality probably counterproductive. 420 00:20:54,800 --> 00:20:57,439 Speaker 1: Because this is another great thought. My friend Kevinn'll use 421 00:20:57,440 --> 00:20:59,959 Speaker 1: the Bruins strength condition coach said once when we were 422 00:21:00,040 --> 00:21:02,320 Speaker 1: talking about this. He said, if your kid isn't one 423 00:21:02,359 --> 00:21:05,199 Speaker 1: of the five best players on their team, move them 424 00:21:05,280 --> 00:21:09,040 Speaker 1: to a lower team, because what you really want is 425 00:21:09,040 --> 00:21:11,800 Speaker 1: for your kid to be on the ice in critical situations. 426 00:21:11,840 --> 00:21:13,040 Speaker 1: I mean, if you're a kid, if you're if you 427 00:21:13,080 --> 00:21:15,240 Speaker 1: have a young kid and you're not playing on a 428 00:21:15,240 --> 00:21:17,000 Speaker 1: team that rolls lines, like if you're on a team 429 00:21:17,240 --> 00:21:20,320 Speaker 1: that has power play or a penalty kill, or that 430 00:21:20,520 --> 00:21:23,040 Speaker 1: shortens the bench. Like I love that when people say, oh, 431 00:21:23,160 --> 00:21:25,119 Speaker 1: we shortened the bench, and like, are you kidding me? 432 00:21:27,480 --> 00:21:29,640 Speaker 1: You four team, you shorten the bench. You some kids 433 00:21:29,720 --> 00:21:34,480 Speaker 1: don't play in critical situations. You tend, Yeah, you tend. 434 00:21:34,720 --> 00:21:38,880 Speaker 1: And that's parents should immediately go someplace else and be like, Okay, 435 00:21:39,040 --> 00:21:42,320 Speaker 1: I'm playing with insane people. I need to get out 436 00:21:42,320 --> 00:21:45,200 Speaker 1: of here because it is so ridiculous. Like I said, 437 00:21:45,200 --> 00:21:47,520 Speaker 1: and we never let our kids do that. We put 438 00:21:47,520 --> 00:21:50,560 Speaker 1: our in club settings where they were with people who 439 00:21:50,600 --> 00:21:53,880 Speaker 1: understood coaching. And if someone said to me, oh, hey, 440 00:21:54,040 --> 00:21:56,320 Speaker 1: you know your your kid may not play in the 441 00:21:56,400 --> 00:21:59,480 Speaker 1: third period of big games, I'd be like, Okay, this 442 00:21:59,520 --> 00:22:01,479 Speaker 1: probably isn't the right place for us to be. Then 443 00:22:01,480 --> 00:22:04,040 Speaker 1: I would like, because how do you learn to respond 444 00:22:04,040 --> 00:22:05,520 Speaker 1: to pressure? How do you learn to score a big goal? 445 00:22:05,560 --> 00:22:07,719 Speaker 1: How do you learn you know, how do those skills 446 00:22:07,760 --> 00:22:10,680 Speaker 1: get developed? If someone says you and you tend oh, 447 00:22:10,720 --> 00:22:13,480 Speaker 1: by the way, you're not good enough, imagine you exact 448 00:22:13,520 --> 00:22:16,920 Speaker 1: that kids and he knows I'm not good enough. I've 449 00:22:16,920 --> 00:22:20,439 Speaker 1: been told, coaches established that I'm not good enough to 450 00:22:20,520 --> 00:22:23,720 Speaker 1: be on the ice right now. That should never ever 451 00:22:24,080 --> 00:22:27,000 Speaker 1: happened to a child ever. So we'll put my holy 452 00:22:27,040 --> 00:22:30,359 Speaker 1: cow and yes, you're right by Fairfield County thing right 453 00:22:30,400 --> 00:22:32,560 Speaker 1: on the money, and I'm gonna take it one step 454 00:22:32,600 --> 00:22:34,679 Speaker 1: even for so I have five brothers, so total crazy 455 00:22:34,720 --> 00:22:37,280 Speaker 1: six boy family, and I have one brother completely not 456 00:22:37,400 --> 00:22:39,040 Speaker 1: to sound very good, I'm gonna throw I'm not gonna 457 00:22:39,080 --> 00:22:41,200 Speaker 1: name him, but you know they could figure it out. 458 00:22:41,280 --> 00:22:45,720 Speaker 1: He literally has as his coach Marty St. Louis. Okay, 459 00:22:45,960 --> 00:22:48,480 Speaker 1: literally the coaches. So at one point the team doing 460 00:22:48,520 --> 00:22:51,520 Speaker 1: really well, and you know, so Marty decided, Hey, I'm 461 00:22:51,520 --> 00:22:53,960 Speaker 1: gonna switch up the positions forwards. R D. Dear Ford's 462 00:22:54,240 --> 00:22:57,600 Speaker 1: my brother went nuts. My brother actually walked into Marty's 463 00:22:57,640 --> 00:23:01,239 Speaker 1: office to complain, and of course my brother prefaces as 464 00:23:01,240 --> 00:23:02,920 Speaker 1: he's telling me the story by saying, oh, by the way, 465 00:23:02,920 --> 00:23:04,360 Speaker 1: you know, I said to Marty, I'm not that dad, 466 00:23:04,520 --> 00:23:08,040 Speaker 1: and I go when you say that, you are by 467 00:23:08,200 --> 00:23:11,600 Speaker 1: definition that father, and I was like, I can't, I 468 00:23:11,640 --> 00:23:14,720 Speaker 1: can't even I can't fathom what you're gonna tell me 469 00:23:14,800 --> 00:23:16,399 Speaker 1: right now that you walked into Marty St. Louis and 470 00:23:16,400 --> 00:23:18,400 Speaker 1: can put and it was all about winning because they start, 471 00:23:18,440 --> 00:23:20,240 Speaker 1: you know, it took a little a while. He can 472 00:23:20,280 --> 00:23:22,840 Speaker 1: play well. It's funny. So Mike Sullivan, who coaches the 473 00:23:22,840 --> 00:23:26,119 Speaker 1: Penguins now two times Stanley Cup winning Mike Sullivan played 474 00:23:26,160 --> 00:23:28,480 Speaker 1: for me at bu and when he coached the Bruins, 475 00:23:28,840 --> 00:23:32,840 Speaker 1: he gets fired from the Bruins and coached his um 476 00:23:33,080 --> 00:23:36,119 Speaker 1: brother's youth hockey team and I remember seeing one day 477 00:23:36,119 --> 00:23:38,080 Speaker 1: and he said, he said, you can't be goes. I'm 478 00:23:38,119 --> 00:23:41,800 Speaker 1: taking more grief from parents right now, he said. And 479 00:23:41,840 --> 00:23:44,160 Speaker 1: I'm looking at these people thinking I was just the 480 00:23:44,160 --> 00:23:48,160 Speaker 1: head coach of the Boston Bruins telling me I can't 481 00:23:48,280 --> 00:23:51,600 Speaker 1: coach because you're not happy the way it's going for 482 00:23:51,680 --> 00:23:54,080 Speaker 1: your kid. But this is, I mean, the insanity I 483 00:23:54,160 --> 00:23:57,960 Speaker 1: can tell you. I think I've had one conversation with 484 00:23:58,000 --> 00:24:02,639 Speaker 1: a coach and it was very simple. You're putting too 485 00:24:02,720 --> 00:24:04,879 Speaker 1: much pressure on my kid. You know, this is my daughter. 486 00:24:05,119 --> 00:24:06,719 Speaker 1: So again, and I can talk about that as an 487 00:24:06,720 --> 00:24:08,560 Speaker 1: eighth grade is she let her team, her high school team, 488 00:24:08,560 --> 00:24:11,320 Speaker 1: and score. And so I said, you know it's too 489 00:24:11,359 --> 00:24:13,720 Speaker 1: much pressure for her. You can't tell her she has 490 00:24:13,760 --> 00:24:16,840 Speaker 1: to score. You know she's she's cries when she comes home. 491 00:24:16,880 --> 00:24:19,600 Speaker 1: You know, she's just not you know, she's thirteen years old. 492 00:24:19,640 --> 00:24:21,520 Speaker 1: You've got eighteen year old girls on your team. You 493 00:24:21,600 --> 00:24:23,280 Speaker 1: know you need to relax. And that was the only 494 00:24:23,359 --> 00:24:25,960 Speaker 1: the only coach conversation I've ever had. And I was 495 00:24:26,000 --> 00:24:27,760 Speaker 1: even lows. I was like, oh, I hate to even 496 00:24:27,800 --> 00:24:30,159 Speaker 1: call and speak to this woman and say this to her, 497 00:24:30,160 --> 00:24:34,439 Speaker 1: But I was like, you gotta kind off because this 498 00:24:34,560 --> 00:24:39,600 Speaker 1: is my little girl who's sad because she's scoring the 499 00:24:39,720 --> 00:24:43,040 Speaker 1: goals on high school team when she's an eighth grade right, 500 00:24:44,000 --> 00:24:46,800 Speaker 1: you know, but I mean realistically, like as soon as 501 00:24:46,920 --> 00:24:49,720 Speaker 1: and again we've all had I have had my parents 502 00:24:49,720 --> 00:24:52,560 Speaker 1: when struck, I am by no means and my uh, 503 00:24:53,480 --> 00:24:56,760 Speaker 1: you know, free of sin. But you're right when you 504 00:24:56,840 --> 00:24:58,560 Speaker 1: do when you walk in and you start telling a 505 00:24:58,560 --> 00:25:00,600 Speaker 1: guy like PARTI, Sandy that you're in the hall. I 506 00:25:00,880 --> 00:25:06,760 Speaker 1: get it. You're a good player, yeah right, yeah, you 507 00:25:06,840 --> 00:25:10,600 Speaker 1: don't understand what kids need at this picular point time 508 00:25:10,800 --> 00:25:13,360 Speaker 1: when you're having that conversation. You really need to turn 509 00:25:13,400 --> 00:25:16,600 Speaker 1: yourself back around and get outside thinking. All right, and 510 00:25:16,880 --> 00:25:20,000 Speaker 1: I become the definition of the insane. Insane And let 511 00:25:20,040 --> 00:25:21,679 Speaker 1: me just throw him under the bus one final time, 512 00:25:21,680 --> 00:25:25,080 Speaker 1: because he plays perfectly in our topic. So his argument 513 00:25:25,600 --> 00:25:27,400 Speaker 1: not with Marty but with me. So I said, Dan, 514 00:25:27,520 --> 00:25:30,200 Speaker 1: you know we're talking about there's all the specialization playing 515 00:25:30,200 --> 00:25:33,280 Speaker 1: different sports. And he says two things, Mike. So if 516 00:25:33,280 --> 00:25:36,199 Speaker 1: you talk about Wayne Gretzky, the people will just dismiss him, say, well, 517 00:25:36,200 --> 00:25:38,080 Speaker 1: he's different. You go, of course he is. But then 518 00:25:38,080 --> 00:25:41,520 Speaker 1: they'll say it's a different time. That's this new excuse, right, 519 00:25:41,520 --> 00:25:44,720 Speaker 1: why the kids should specialize. It's a different time that 520 00:25:45,119 --> 00:25:47,320 Speaker 1: now if they want to be really good, they have 521 00:25:47,400 --> 00:25:49,040 Speaker 1: to do that. I go, what does that mean? What 522 00:25:49,119 --> 00:25:51,240 Speaker 1: has changed things? And this is where I always go 523 00:25:51,320 --> 00:25:55,520 Speaker 1: back to look at the evidence, right, look at the 524 00:25:55,520 --> 00:25:59,119 Speaker 1: evidence Canadians. If you go back Canadians at one point 525 00:25:59,119 --> 00:26:03,359 Speaker 1: where I believe eighty five of the National Hockey League, 526 00:26:03,880 --> 00:26:09,120 Speaker 1: they have clung strictly to the major junior Mini NHL 527 00:26:09,280 --> 00:26:13,440 Speaker 1: eight game system, all the while losing fifty of their 528 00:26:13,480 --> 00:26:18,040 Speaker 1: market share to Europeans who played forty game seasons, an 529 00:26:18,040 --> 00:26:22,040 Speaker 1: American collegiate players, even America, even Canadian kids who went 530 00:26:22,080 --> 00:26:24,119 Speaker 1: to college in the US and elected to play forty 531 00:26:24,160 --> 00:26:27,040 Speaker 1: games a year versus a d but fifth like a 532 00:26:27,080 --> 00:26:30,200 Speaker 1: thirty five percent shift in market ship. And you look 533 00:26:30,240 --> 00:26:31,800 Speaker 1: at that and say, I always look it would be like, 534 00:26:32,080 --> 00:26:34,680 Speaker 1: you know, PEPSI is saying, hey, by the way, Coke 535 00:26:34,760 --> 00:26:38,680 Speaker 1: has gone in the tank, Coke's dound, we're thinking about 536 00:26:38,760 --> 00:26:41,359 Speaker 1: hiring their marketing people and having them put together a 537 00:26:41,359 --> 00:26:43,959 Speaker 1: campaign for us at PEPSI, because our goal is for 538 00:26:44,040 --> 00:26:46,520 Speaker 1: us to lose our market ship. Do you know what 539 00:26:46,560 --> 00:26:48,679 Speaker 1: I mean? This is the problem when people say it's 540 00:26:48,680 --> 00:26:51,000 Speaker 1: a different time, It is a different time, and it 541 00:26:51,040 --> 00:26:55,520 Speaker 1: makes it easier, not harder, because all you fools are 542 00:26:55,600 --> 00:26:58,239 Speaker 1: ruining your kids at a young age, not looking at 543 00:26:58,280 --> 00:27:00,320 Speaker 1: the statistics and realizing that your kids in a quit 544 00:27:00,359 --> 00:27:03,119 Speaker 1: at thirteen and fourteen because it was no fun and 545 00:27:03,119 --> 00:27:06,879 Speaker 1: because there was a lot of pressure, I mean the statistics. 546 00:27:06,920 --> 00:27:09,359 Speaker 1: And this is the thing. There is a huge body 547 00:27:09,400 --> 00:27:13,800 Speaker 1: of evidence out there saying that this isn't true. But 548 00:27:14,440 --> 00:27:19,520 Speaker 1: all you need is one kind of entrepreneurial parent saying 549 00:27:19,520 --> 00:27:22,040 Speaker 1: that it is true. Oh no, no, it's absolutely true, 550 00:27:22,520 --> 00:27:24,960 Speaker 1: and everybody else because they wanted what do we want confirmation? 551 00:27:25,040 --> 00:27:27,320 Speaker 1: Bis right, we want someone to tell us that what 552 00:27:27,400 --> 00:27:30,160 Speaker 1: we believe is true is in fact true. So when 553 00:27:30,240 --> 00:27:33,760 Speaker 1: someone does, you said, see, I told you, you know, 554 00:27:33,760 --> 00:27:36,760 Speaker 1: I talked to him, so he said he agrees with me. Yeah, yeah, 555 00:27:36,960 --> 00:27:39,760 Speaker 1: Jack Parker Vio. It's funny. He's one of the funniest, 556 00:27:39,880 --> 00:27:43,160 Speaker 1: smartest guys that I have had that had the pleasure 557 00:27:43,200 --> 00:27:45,600 Speaker 1: to be around. And he used to always say that, yeah, Mike, 558 00:27:45,960 --> 00:27:48,480 Speaker 1: don't talk to people on the phone. They call for agreement, 559 00:27:48,480 --> 00:27:52,400 Speaker 1: not for advice. And I was like, yeah, you're probably right, 560 00:27:54,160 --> 00:27:58,840 Speaker 1: really well put. And yeah, it's uh, it's amazing to 561 00:27:58,960 --> 00:28:01,520 Speaker 1: me when it comes to kids. As you're saying that, 562 00:28:01,560 --> 00:28:03,639 Speaker 1: people don't look at the statistics. You know, what was 563 00:28:03,640 --> 00:28:06,160 Speaker 1: it Norway where they talk about like, it's not about 564 00:28:06,160 --> 00:28:09,119 Speaker 1: playing games, it's about practices and the number of games 565 00:28:09,160 --> 00:28:10,800 Speaker 1: that are played. That's not where you get good, Mike, Right, 566 00:28:10,840 --> 00:28:12,760 Speaker 1: you get good in practice and then the games are 567 00:28:12,840 --> 00:28:15,359 Speaker 1: you know, a game data Like you know, we have 568 00:28:15,400 --> 00:28:17,080 Speaker 1: parents who was still fighting. They want to play full 569 00:28:17,080 --> 00:28:20,560 Speaker 1: ice games at you ten right, and you know, I 570 00:28:20,600 --> 00:28:23,320 Speaker 1: mean there's so many of these things that are just 571 00:28:23,560 --> 00:28:26,119 Speaker 1: absolutely People say, oh, the kids don't learn offside, they 572 00:28:26,160 --> 00:28:28,520 Speaker 1: don't learn positions, and I'm like, no, they just learned 573 00:28:28,560 --> 00:28:30,040 Speaker 1: to be good at skill. They get good skills and 574 00:28:30,080 --> 00:28:31,880 Speaker 1: get good at the game. Oh yeah, we can teach 575 00:28:31,920 --> 00:28:35,960 Speaker 1: him off sides in five minutes. Right, you know what 576 00:28:36,160 --> 00:28:38,000 Speaker 1: they learned from the video games, Mike, they know at 577 00:28:38,000 --> 00:28:42,320 Speaker 1: the play NHL two. Funny, I was at a seven 578 00:28:42,360 --> 00:28:45,200 Speaker 1: hour in Germany at UH One of my friends is 579 00:28:45,640 --> 00:28:48,520 Speaker 1: I was director of the German National Ice Hockey Federation, 580 00:28:48,600 --> 00:28:50,280 Speaker 1: so invited to be able to speak over there on 581 00:28:50,320 --> 00:28:54,080 Speaker 1: off ice training. But I went to his talk and 582 00:28:54,200 --> 00:28:56,080 Speaker 1: one of the things that he said, which was really interesting. 583 00:28:56,120 --> 00:28:59,680 Speaker 1: So he's got, you know, he's uh the offensive scheme 584 00:28:59,720 --> 00:29:01,880 Speaker 1: up on a board and he's got F one, F two, 585 00:29:01,880 --> 00:29:05,560 Speaker 1: F three and he said, basically, what you gotta understand, 586 00:29:05,600 --> 00:29:08,720 Speaker 1: he said, is that there's two positions in hockey, the 587 00:29:08,760 --> 00:29:10,520 Speaker 1: guy with the puck and the guy without the puck. 588 00:29:11,800 --> 00:29:15,320 Speaker 1: He said, if you're center left ring, left wing, right wing, 589 00:29:15,400 --> 00:29:18,040 Speaker 1: left defense, right defense, he said, you need to understand 590 00:29:18,160 --> 00:29:19,600 Speaker 1: are you the guy with it or the guy without? 591 00:29:19,680 --> 00:29:21,000 Speaker 1: You said, if you're the guy without it, you gotta 592 00:29:21,000 --> 00:29:22,280 Speaker 1: figure out how to get where you can get so 593 00:29:22,360 --> 00:29:26,880 Speaker 1: you get it. I'm thinking you're thinking, this is freaking brilliance, 594 00:29:27,760 --> 00:29:30,560 Speaker 1: hockey brilliance right here. And yet some people are like, 595 00:29:30,600 --> 00:29:32,080 Speaker 1: oh no, you gotta be sad. You know, you gotta 596 00:29:32,120 --> 00:29:33,600 Speaker 1: get down lower, you gotta stay in the middle. You 597 00:29:33,600 --> 00:29:35,240 Speaker 1: gotta do this. And and then you look at your 598 00:29:35,280 --> 00:29:38,040 Speaker 1: kid and he's completely out of position and crowding the 599 00:29:38,040 --> 00:29:40,400 Speaker 1: guy with the puck because someone told me he needs 600 00:29:40,600 --> 00:29:43,640 Speaker 1: this is where you stand. And then you know, people don't, well, 601 00:29:43,640 --> 00:29:45,360 Speaker 1: the kids don't have hockey sense. They don't have hockey 602 00:29:45,360 --> 00:29:48,440 Speaker 1: sense because stupid parents beat it out of him in 603 00:29:48,480 --> 00:29:52,000 Speaker 1: the right. But Scotty Gomez is a good friend of 604 00:29:52,040 --> 00:29:55,400 Speaker 1: mine and we were at a We're talking about a 605 00:29:55,400 --> 00:29:57,560 Speaker 1: seminar at one time, and he said, yeah, I did 606 00:29:57,560 --> 00:30:01,000 Speaker 1: a hockey camp with these kids and the coach was 607 00:30:01,280 --> 00:30:03,200 Speaker 1: we had a dumped in the pucket, he said, And 608 00:30:03,240 --> 00:30:04,920 Speaker 1: I was on ice coach, you know what, on ice 609 00:30:04,960 --> 00:30:06,920 Speaker 1: guest or whatever he sit, and I was like, no, 610 00:30:07,680 --> 00:30:11,040 Speaker 1: never dumped the pucking, never carried across the blue line, 611 00:30:11,080 --> 00:30:13,640 Speaker 1: he said, because at some point someone's gonna tell you 612 00:30:13,720 --> 00:30:16,840 Speaker 1: can never do it again. You know what that goes to. 613 00:30:16,920 --> 00:30:19,160 Speaker 1: I begrudge it, like I will not. I coached right 614 00:30:19,200 --> 00:30:21,360 Speaker 1: at a Boston college for a year whatever, and it 615 00:30:21,400 --> 00:30:23,320 Speaker 1: was so crazy and nuts, I said, I'm not there's 616 00:30:23,360 --> 00:30:26,320 Speaker 1: there's no upside disagrees of losing for me. But I 617 00:30:26,360 --> 00:30:28,760 Speaker 1: was swinging the door, you know, one year and so 618 00:30:28,800 --> 00:30:30,840 Speaker 1: they asked me to take the coaching certification. One of 619 00:30:30,880 --> 00:30:33,040 Speaker 1: the greatest guys I've ever heard, similar to you, like 620 00:30:33,080 --> 00:30:35,880 Speaker 1: same philosophy, whatever, really smart, and he talked about exactly 621 00:30:35,880 --> 00:30:37,160 Speaker 1: what you're talking about. He says, what are you hear 622 00:30:37,200 --> 00:30:39,560 Speaker 1: in youth hockey? Dump it in and then get it out. 623 00:30:39,600 --> 00:30:42,400 Speaker 1: So no, one's carrying the puck. It's jumping in and 624 00:30:42,480 --> 00:30:44,640 Speaker 1: get it out and just throw the puck around. That's 625 00:30:44,680 --> 00:30:48,280 Speaker 1: not how you get good, right, it's crazy someone who's 626 00:30:48,360 --> 00:30:51,360 Speaker 1: encouraging your kid carry the puck in makeup play make 627 00:30:51,440 --> 00:30:54,360 Speaker 1: up coach Parko would always say, make a hockey play. Yeah, 628 00:30:54,400 --> 00:30:55,400 Speaker 1: that's what I want to do. I want you to 629 00:30:55,440 --> 00:30:58,400 Speaker 1: make a play. Yeah, yeah, And he wanted guys that 630 00:30:58,440 --> 00:31:00,920 Speaker 1: could make plays, like you know, the guy's the best players, Well, 631 00:31:00,920 --> 00:31:03,000 Speaker 1: guys that can make plays like yeah, obviously we had 632 00:31:03,000 --> 00:31:05,040 Speaker 1: a fourth line of guys whose job was to get 633 00:31:05,040 --> 00:31:07,880 Speaker 1: it in and get it out. But but are really 634 00:31:07,920 --> 00:31:10,320 Speaker 1: good players. You know when we had the Tony Montes 635 00:31:10,360 --> 00:31:12,480 Speaker 1: and the mcgheckers and the Joe Sackos and all these guys, 636 00:31:12,720 --> 00:31:14,160 Speaker 1: you know, you want the guys that could make plays. 637 00:31:14,160 --> 00:31:16,160 Speaker 1: And the best guys were the guys who could see 638 00:31:16,160 --> 00:31:18,840 Speaker 1: if the guys would vision, the guys that understood what 639 00:31:18,880 --> 00:31:20,080 Speaker 1: was and that's what like you talk about, you know, 640 00:31:20,080 --> 00:31:23,280 Speaker 1: people talk about Gretzky. You know, it's like playing it. 641 00:31:23,280 --> 00:31:26,920 Speaker 1: It's really interesting. By the cross friend Jamie was evaluating. 642 00:31:26,920 --> 00:31:29,160 Speaker 1: He evaluates players, and one of the things he evaluates, 643 00:31:29,160 --> 00:31:32,600 Speaker 1: which is a Premier League soccer term number of head 644 00:31:32,840 --> 00:31:37,760 Speaker 1: terms interesting, interesting, they said, because the best players in 645 00:31:37,800 --> 00:31:41,320 Speaker 1: the Premier League are constantly turning their head. They're constantly 646 00:31:41,360 --> 00:31:44,320 Speaker 1: scanning the field to know where everybody is, where the 647 00:31:44,320 --> 00:31:47,640 Speaker 1: defenders are, where their players are. And so if you 648 00:31:47,680 --> 00:31:49,280 Speaker 1: look at a kid and think you don't get a 649 00:31:49,320 --> 00:31:51,200 Speaker 1: lot of head turns, you've got a kid without a 650 00:31:51,240 --> 00:31:53,200 Speaker 1: lot of awareness. You know, if you've got a kid, 651 00:31:53,360 --> 00:31:58,800 Speaker 1: and what do we tell kids? Focus right? Focus right? 652 00:31:58,920 --> 00:32:00,800 Speaker 1: You have been good at hockey if you focus. Yeah, 653 00:32:01,320 --> 00:32:03,240 Speaker 1: I want you he turn. I want you looking around 654 00:32:03,240 --> 00:32:06,000 Speaker 1: and figuring out who's here? Where are all the other people? Yeah, 655 00:32:06,600 --> 00:32:08,320 Speaker 1: we have guys. It's funny. We gotta We always talk 656 00:32:08,360 --> 00:32:10,480 Speaker 1: about power plays and I'm like, the first lesson in 657 00:32:10,480 --> 00:32:14,400 Speaker 1: the power places should be okay, five is more than four, 658 00:32:14,480 --> 00:32:17,560 Speaker 1: it's one more than four, which means we should have 659 00:32:17,600 --> 00:32:21,040 Speaker 1: an open person all the time because it's ez you 660 00:32:21,080 --> 00:32:22,720 Speaker 1: want to get on the park play and then shoot 661 00:32:22,720 --> 00:32:26,280 Speaker 1: it right, And you think, um, did you not understand 662 00:32:26,320 --> 00:32:29,000 Speaker 1: the part where we're going to have one openers? Right? 663 00:32:29,160 --> 00:32:32,000 Speaker 1: We have an advantage. You gotta understand that theory, you 664 00:32:32,080 --> 00:32:34,560 Speaker 1: know what I mean. But that's the stuff like game 665 00:32:34,640 --> 00:32:36,800 Speaker 1: sense wise, know, you watch down in the power play 666 00:32:36,800 --> 00:32:39,360 Speaker 1: and take a shot and you're thinking, you know, how 667 00:32:39,440 --> 00:32:42,400 Speaker 1: dumb is that? No hockey sense? And then his kids 668 00:32:42,440 --> 00:32:45,320 Speaker 1: get older, you start to the kids with hockey sense. 669 00:32:45,360 --> 00:32:48,680 Speaker 1: That's why sometimes you know late bloomers. And I mean, 670 00:32:48,680 --> 00:32:51,040 Speaker 1: we could get into we get sure this week, two 671 00:32:51,040 --> 00:32:54,560 Speaker 1: store um two more podcasts. But there's something called relative 672 00:32:54,600 --> 00:32:58,560 Speaker 1: age effect, and relative age effect is huge and hockey. 673 00:32:58,600 --> 00:33:01,720 Speaker 1: So my son is a relative age effect guy in hockey. 674 00:33:01,840 --> 00:33:04,520 Speaker 1: December twenty three, so he's eight days. He always said, Dad, 675 00:33:04,560 --> 00:33:06,920 Speaker 1: I would have been an unbelievable old right back to 676 00:33:07,040 --> 00:33:10,440 Speaker 1: Malcolm Gladwell, right, screwing everyone up. Mamma just laid still 677 00:33:10,480 --> 00:33:13,240 Speaker 1: for eight more days. You know, I might have been 678 00:33:13,280 --> 00:33:17,000 Speaker 1: like the best kid at my age, craptic. But as 679 00:33:17,000 --> 00:33:20,720 Speaker 1: a result he was always a little behind. And even 680 00:33:20,720 --> 00:33:24,880 Speaker 1: now fourteen going on fifteen, he's just catching up because 681 00:33:25,240 --> 00:33:26,880 Speaker 1: there are kids that he plays against. You know, when 682 00:33:26,880 --> 00:33:30,040 Speaker 1: we were playing in town hockey two year blocks he 683 00:33:30,200 --> 00:33:31,800 Speaker 1: was ten, there were kids in the team. They were twelve, 684 00:33:31,960 --> 00:33:34,600 Speaker 1: right right, like Dad, these kids are so much better 685 00:33:34,600 --> 00:33:37,120 Speaker 1: than me. And I'm like Mark, they're gonna be juniors 686 00:33:37,760 --> 00:33:41,920 Speaker 1: when you're a freshman, right, right, that's crazy, especially as 687 00:33:41,920 --> 00:33:44,560 Speaker 1: a boy, right, as a boy. But when you look 688 00:33:44,600 --> 00:33:46,280 Speaker 1: at that and think, you know, in town hockey and 689 00:33:46,320 --> 00:33:49,160 Speaker 1: two year blocks, it can be a massive difference and 690 00:33:49,240 --> 00:33:51,960 Speaker 1: even one year twelve months in a ten year old 691 00:33:52,120 --> 00:33:56,280 Speaker 1: life or eleven months massively and you can take soccer 692 00:33:56,320 --> 00:33:59,600 Speaker 1: has actually started to look at doing half years or 693 00:33:59,600 --> 00:34:02,959 Speaker 1: not if it's seem how strong like if you look 694 00:34:02,960 --> 00:34:04,760 Speaker 1: because that's why you look at Gladwell and stuff. Gladwell 695 00:34:04,800 --> 00:34:07,280 Speaker 1: was right on that in terms of relative age effect. 696 00:34:07,360 --> 00:34:11,800 Speaker 1: Someone posted a Canadian roster for like a a Canadian 697 00:34:11,840 --> 00:34:14,400 Speaker 1: a pretty good Canadian youth team, and it was it 698 00:34:14,480 --> 00:34:17,560 Speaker 1: was sev first quarter. Frightening, right, I mean, it's it's 699 00:34:17,560 --> 00:34:20,120 Speaker 1: just true. That's the stat right, and makes sense. The 700 00:34:20,200 --> 00:34:22,680 Speaker 1: alternates were third and fourth quarter kids, the kids that 701 00:34:22,760 --> 00:34:26,040 Speaker 1: didn't quite make it. We're kids that were born basically 702 00:34:26,080 --> 00:34:30,520 Speaker 1: from June on and and so you realize, you know, 703 00:34:30,600 --> 00:34:32,160 Speaker 1: there's all of this stuff, and this this is the 704 00:34:32,200 --> 00:34:35,120 Speaker 1: stuff that parents don't factor in, you know, this early maturation. 705 00:34:35,160 --> 00:34:36,960 Speaker 1: You know your kids sometimes obviously you get the kids 706 00:34:36,960 --> 00:34:38,120 Speaker 1: you know we used to laugh, you know, the Greek 707 00:34:38,120 --> 00:34:40,520 Speaker 1: and the Italian kids, you know who we're shaving, you know, 708 00:34:40,560 --> 00:34:43,319 Speaker 1: when they're in seventh grade, and you know that they 709 00:34:43,360 --> 00:34:46,399 Speaker 1: tend to physically, if you've got early maturing kids, they're 710 00:34:46,440 --> 00:34:49,840 Speaker 1: gonna be physically way ahead of everybody else, but the 711 00:34:49,880 --> 00:34:53,560 Speaker 1: fields because the play fields gonna level in that fifteen 712 00:34:53,640 --> 00:34:57,279 Speaker 1: sixteen age bracket, and suddenly those kids are not going 713 00:34:57,320 --> 00:35:01,520 Speaker 1: to have that incredible sort of match dr rational advantage 714 00:35:01,600 --> 00:35:05,680 Speaker 1: that uh that that some people get. And then if 715 00:35:05,680 --> 00:35:07,719 Speaker 1: they didn't acquire those skills, and he goes to like 716 00:35:07,760 --> 00:35:10,520 Speaker 1: football to Mike, especially when you have the heavier kid 717 00:35:10,560 --> 00:35:13,440 Speaker 1: at ten, twelve thirteen, you know, he's alignment. He doesn't 718 00:35:13,440 --> 00:35:15,719 Speaker 1: get to do touch the ball, he doesn't get any 719 00:35:15,719 --> 00:35:17,000 Speaker 1: of that stuff. And then all of a sudden, at 720 00:35:17,000 --> 00:35:21,200 Speaker 1: sixteen seventeen, he shoots up to six four five. And 721 00:35:21,239 --> 00:35:24,160 Speaker 1: he spent his entire life blocking kids, right because he 722 00:35:24,160 --> 00:35:27,400 Speaker 1: didn't play those sports or or play One of my 723 00:35:27,440 --> 00:35:31,840 Speaker 1: son's friends is five to eighty pounds and he's he 724 00:35:31,840 --> 00:35:33,880 Speaker 1: played high school football this year as a freshman. And 725 00:35:33,880 --> 00:35:36,840 Speaker 1: I asked him, you know, because he played guard in linebacker, 726 00:35:37,320 --> 00:35:38,399 Speaker 1: and I said, you know, what, do you think you're 727 00:35:38,400 --> 00:35:41,360 Speaker 1: gonna do it? It's cool, Matt, And he said they're 728 00:35:41,360 --> 00:35:44,399 Speaker 1: gonna let me try running back at school, And I thought, 729 00:35:44,520 --> 00:35:45,879 Speaker 1: have you ever done I said, have you ever done 730 00:35:45,880 --> 00:35:47,760 Speaker 1: that before? And he just looked at me very serious. 731 00:35:47,800 --> 00:35:49,399 Speaker 1: He said, no, I'm too big. I've never been allowed 732 00:35:49,400 --> 00:35:52,440 Speaker 1: to run the ball. Yeah, because they have like a 733 00:35:52,440 --> 00:35:54,880 Speaker 1: weight limit in terms of if you wait over a 734 00:35:54,880 --> 00:35:57,640 Speaker 1: certain amount, Even though and his kid was incredibly athletically, 735 00:35:57,640 --> 00:36:01,160 Speaker 1: he would have been an absolute wrecking machine. Prof they 736 00:36:01,280 --> 00:36:04,160 Speaker 1: let it carry the ball, which is why they don't rule. 737 00:36:05,400 --> 00:36:07,839 Speaker 1: But in that case it actually, you know, this kid 738 00:36:08,640 --> 00:36:12,640 Speaker 1: never gets any reps carrying the ball, right, which is crazy. Right. 739 00:36:13,320 --> 00:36:15,399 Speaker 1: So there's just so much, I mean, there's so much 740 00:36:15,440 --> 00:36:17,520 Speaker 1: wrong with you sports. I mean I could, I could, 741 00:36:17,560 --> 00:36:19,680 Speaker 1: literally I could do this. I've done a three hour 742 00:36:19,760 --> 00:36:21,600 Speaker 1: lecture on this. I could go on for more than 743 00:36:21,680 --> 00:36:25,399 Speaker 1: three hours talking about the problems. But the big thing 744 00:36:25,520 --> 00:36:28,160 Speaker 1: is is we just have to make you know, parents 745 00:36:28,200 --> 00:36:31,160 Speaker 1: have to step back and think, Okay, am I really 746 00:36:31,200 --> 00:36:34,120 Speaker 1: doing what's best for my kids? And that, like I said, 747 00:36:34,640 --> 00:36:36,880 Speaker 1: if your kid, if you're not on a team that 748 00:36:36,960 --> 00:36:40,000 Speaker 1: rolls lines, you should be moving to a different organization. 749 00:36:40,040 --> 00:36:42,719 Speaker 1: You should just be like, Okay, it doesn't matter that 750 00:36:42,800 --> 00:36:49,399 Speaker 1: I'm on the a team in unnamed town in Fairfield County. 751 00:36:50,080 --> 00:36:51,400 Speaker 1: You're better off having your kid you on the B 752 00:36:51,520 --> 00:36:54,919 Speaker 1: team and play every second or third shift and get 753 00:36:54,960 --> 00:36:58,880 Speaker 1: better at hockey. Then suddenly realize, oh, go games on 754 00:36:58,920 --> 00:37:01,719 Speaker 1: the line. It's sorry, Mike, take a seat over there 755 00:37:01,719 --> 00:37:04,719 Speaker 1: and watch learn something here while you see your your 756 00:37:04,760 --> 00:37:08,080 Speaker 1: peers played. Because we realize kids are disappearing at thirteen 757 00:37:08,440 --> 00:37:11,160 Speaker 1: because it's not fun. Who's gonna be the first kid 758 00:37:11,160 --> 00:37:15,200 Speaker 1: to quit? Kid doesn't play right, he's gonna look at things. 759 00:37:15,400 --> 00:37:17,200 Speaker 1: Why would I bother? Why am I going to go 760 00:37:17,239 --> 00:37:19,520 Speaker 1: back out again next year when I and this is 761 00:37:19,560 --> 00:37:22,400 Speaker 1: the thing from a self esteem standpoint, when I've already 762 00:37:22,480 --> 00:37:25,319 Speaker 1: been told by the adults whose opinion I value so 763 00:37:25,480 --> 00:37:30,120 Speaker 1: highly that I'm not good enough and you can't you know, 764 00:37:30,160 --> 00:37:31,960 Speaker 1: Patson to coach, I didn't say he wasn't good enough. 765 00:37:32,320 --> 00:37:35,000 Speaker 1: It's like, well, you didn't let him play, Okay, that's 766 00:37:35,040 --> 00:37:37,160 Speaker 1: like putting a freaking stamp on his head that says 767 00:37:37,160 --> 00:37:39,279 Speaker 1: not good enough. You know what I mean. You've been 768 00:37:39,360 --> 00:37:41,800 Speaker 1: sat on the bench in the third period of a 769 00:37:41,880 --> 00:37:46,759 Speaker 1: U twelve hockey game and you gotta put that kid out. 770 00:37:46,960 --> 00:37:49,879 Speaker 1: You know, live with the mistake. Whatever happens happens, because 771 00:37:49,920 --> 00:37:52,040 Speaker 1: again what happens, that's why what happens in a U 772 00:37:52,080 --> 00:37:55,360 Speaker 1: twelve game, like what is the what is the ramification 773 00:37:55,400 --> 00:37:58,040 Speaker 1: of the loss? Right, well, that's what I say. Right 774 00:37:58,120 --> 00:38:02,000 Speaker 1: when you're eighteen and whatever, you know, collegiate level, they're 775 00:38:02,040 --> 00:38:03,279 Speaker 1: not gonna look back and say, you know, how did 776 00:38:03,320 --> 00:38:05,279 Speaker 1: you do when you were a scort major? What was 777 00:38:05,320 --> 00:38:10,680 Speaker 1: your record pewee one of the Quebec Peeweet tournament. I'm like, well, 778 00:38:10,719 --> 00:38:13,319 Speaker 1: what other tremendous accomplishments did you have at twelve? Because 779 00:38:13,320 --> 00:38:16,160 Speaker 1: I'd really love to spend some time talking to you 780 00:38:16,200 --> 00:38:18,920 Speaker 1: about what an awful childhood you had, because that's the 781 00:38:19,000 --> 00:38:22,319 Speaker 1: high point of your life was some peewee tournament that 782 00:38:22,400 --> 00:38:26,640 Speaker 1: you won at twelve years old. I mean, that's just miserable. 783 00:38:26,719 --> 00:38:29,040 Speaker 1: And that kid, I've always said that, you know you're 784 00:38:29,239 --> 00:38:32,440 Speaker 1: I don't want my kids to be the star at eight, ten, twelve, fourteen, right, 785 00:38:32,440 --> 00:38:34,160 Speaker 1: I want them under the radar. I want them having fun. 786 00:38:34,640 --> 00:38:36,600 Speaker 1: And many of those kids who win tournaments, so that 787 00:38:36,600 --> 00:38:39,520 Speaker 1: you just described, Uh, if you were a betting person, 788 00:38:39,600 --> 00:38:42,600 Speaker 1: you are going to be who they think we're gonna be. 789 00:38:42,600 --> 00:38:46,399 Speaker 1: Come and again, if you're because if you're a betting person, 790 00:38:46,440 --> 00:38:50,759 Speaker 1: you're betting is statistically you're right. Yeah, because they're not. 791 00:38:50,960 --> 00:38:54,359 Speaker 1: It doesn't end up that way. It just it never has. 792 00:38:54,360 --> 00:38:56,640 Speaker 1: And people will always point to you know, they love 793 00:38:56,719 --> 00:38:58,560 Speaker 1: to point to the outli or to the exception. You know, 794 00:38:58,600 --> 00:39:01,080 Speaker 1: they'll point to Sydney Crosby are the point. But even 795 00:39:01,120 --> 00:39:02,920 Speaker 1: like jack I I remember Jackson and be like, oh, 796 00:39:03,040 --> 00:39:06,080 Speaker 1: you know, I wasn't that good. I didn't be like fourteen, 797 00:39:06,120 --> 00:39:07,960 Speaker 1: I really get good. I had a big growth spirit 798 00:39:08,320 --> 00:39:09,880 Speaker 1: and I was just, you know, all of a sudden 799 00:39:10,160 --> 00:39:14,640 Speaker 1: at fourteen he jumped on the radar. He wasn't you know, 800 00:39:14,719 --> 00:39:17,440 Speaker 1: all the way coming up. You know, people weren't. There 801 00:39:17,480 --> 00:39:19,359 Speaker 1: are other kids that people thought were gonna be better 802 00:39:19,400 --> 00:39:20,880 Speaker 1: than him, and now you look, you know in New 803 00:39:20,880 --> 00:39:22,600 Speaker 1: England it may not have been anybody that's ever been 804 00:39:22,600 --> 00:39:27,440 Speaker 1: better than him, you know, from this area. And you know, 805 00:39:27,480 --> 00:39:30,719 Speaker 1: it's the same type of situation. You want your kid 806 00:39:31,400 --> 00:39:33,799 Speaker 1: to be in a competitive situation. You want them to 807 00:39:33,840 --> 00:39:38,040 Speaker 1: be getting good coaching, being around good people, being treated positively. 808 00:39:38,160 --> 00:39:41,359 Speaker 1: These are the things that you want. Not not being 809 00:39:41,360 --> 00:39:44,160 Speaker 1: on the best team, not having the best record. Those 810 00:39:44,200 --> 00:39:47,480 Speaker 1: things don't matter. I constantly was looking at what kind 811 00:39:47,480 --> 00:39:49,240 Speaker 1: of people do I want my kids to be around? 812 00:39:50,160 --> 00:39:52,239 Speaker 1: Who do I want coaching them? Who do I want? 813 00:39:52,280 --> 00:39:55,040 Speaker 1: Because again, I know how important coaches were for me 814 00:39:56,000 --> 00:39:57,799 Speaker 1: as a kid in terms of molding the type of 815 00:39:57,840 --> 00:40:00,759 Speaker 1: person that I became. And I think that's what I want. 816 00:40:00,760 --> 00:40:03,680 Speaker 1: And like I said, when when you're the person who's 817 00:40:03,680 --> 00:40:05,759 Speaker 1: telling I had a friendly other day, are not the 818 00:40:05,800 --> 00:40:08,040 Speaker 1: other day last year? Whose telling your daughter got cut 819 00:40:08,080 --> 00:40:11,080 Speaker 1: from her youth four teen team. They needed a better defenseman, 820 00:40:12,160 --> 00:40:14,920 Speaker 1: so they cut her. And she's like, how can an adult? 821 00:40:16,000 --> 00:40:17,279 Speaker 1: It was kind of like, hey, these are the kids 822 00:40:17,320 --> 00:40:18,640 Speaker 1: on your team, These are the kids on your team. 823 00:40:18,680 --> 00:40:22,360 Speaker 1: Kick cut kids at fourteen? Yeah? And I looked and 824 00:40:22,360 --> 00:40:26,400 Speaker 1: I saw Jeff Blash, the Detroit coach, talking to clinic 825 00:40:26,440 --> 00:40:27,600 Speaker 1: one time too, and one of the things that he 826 00:40:27,600 --> 00:40:29,879 Speaker 1: said that stuck with me. He said, the best way 827 00:40:29,920 --> 00:40:32,760 Speaker 1: to get your team better is to get your players better. Yeah, 828 00:40:33,280 --> 00:40:35,120 Speaker 1: that should be your focus. Your focus should be on 829 00:40:35,200 --> 00:40:39,239 Speaker 1: making your players better. Right, And and I sat there 830 00:40:39,239 --> 00:40:41,480 Speaker 1: and thought he's right. And he was talking about it 831 00:40:41,480 --> 00:40:45,239 Speaker 1: more in the NHL mode of you need to He said, 832 00:40:45,280 --> 00:40:46,799 Speaker 1: you know, if you trade, he said, you know you're 833 00:40:46,800 --> 00:40:48,759 Speaker 1: gonna trade a four million all defenseman for a four 834 00:40:48,760 --> 00:40:51,040 Speaker 1: million dollar defenseman, he said, you know you're gonna trade 835 00:40:51,080 --> 00:40:53,600 Speaker 1: light parts for light parts. You can't, really, you can't 836 00:40:53,640 --> 00:40:56,120 Speaker 1: just upgrade your team in the salary cap era by 837 00:40:56,120 --> 00:40:58,920 Speaker 1: swapping out players, he said. But what you can do 838 00:40:58,960 --> 00:41:02,480 Speaker 1: is get your players better. And you know you don't 839 00:41:02,480 --> 00:41:06,080 Speaker 1: get players better by telling them they're not good. And 840 00:41:06,120 --> 00:41:09,720 Speaker 1: I love and again, yeah we could do ten hours. Uh, 841 00:41:09,760 --> 00:41:11,880 Speaker 1: you know, it's so simplistic. But as as we've been 842 00:41:11,880 --> 00:41:16,240 Speaker 1: talking about, the answers quite often are the opening of Miracle, 843 00:41:16,640 --> 00:41:19,399 Speaker 1: when he's he's putting the team together right and her 844 00:41:19,480 --> 00:41:22,360 Speaker 1: Brooks hands the piece of paper after that first, I 845 00:41:22,400 --> 00:41:25,440 Speaker 1: love this too. We have three tryouts, Mike, three for 846 00:41:25,640 --> 00:41:28,880 Speaker 1: this hockey team that y'll go named. They know before 847 00:41:29,080 --> 00:41:30,960 Speaker 1: that anyone steps on the ice who will be on 848 00:41:31,000 --> 00:41:33,600 Speaker 1: that team. These coaches know they were you know, they 849 00:41:33,640 --> 00:41:37,400 Speaker 1: call the kids in. Uh. So you know the beginning 850 00:41:37,400 --> 00:41:39,600 Speaker 1: of Miracle where he says, they say these aren't the 851 00:41:39,600 --> 00:41:41,040 Speaker 1: best players, and he goes, I don't want the best players. 852 00:41:41,080 --> 00:41:43,200 Speaker 1: I want the best team. You know, again, so simple, 853 00:41:43,280 --> 00:41:48,560 Speaker 1: it's so powerful, and parents don't get that. Yeah, you know, Uh, 854 00:41:48,600 --> 00:41:50,800 Speaker 1: So let's quick wrap up. So for those of you 855 00:41:50,840 --> 00:41:54,920 Speaker 1: who we made really angry good. So the show's about 856 00:41:54,960 --> 00:41:57,479 Speaker 1: disruption and fitness and listen, you're gonna say yeah whatever, 857 00:41:57,520 --> 00:41:59,400 Speaker 1: and you're gonna have your kids. Mike Boyle is a 858 00:41:59,400 --> 00:42:02,160 Speaker 1: guy who trained, He's be doing it forever. And listen 859 00:42:02,160 --> 00:42:04,640 Speaker 1: to you want happy kids and if you truly, if you, 860 00:42:04,719 --> 00:42:06,799 Speaker 1: if you're a smart person, that's what pulls me away, Mike. 861 00:42:06,840 --> 00:42:09,680 Speaker 1: As many of these people are, you know, accomplished executives, 862 00:42:09,680 --> 00:42:11,399 Speaker 1: as we talked about, but they're not going to there 863 00:42:11,440 --> 00:42:14,279 Speaker 1: there the confirmation bias. They want to do what they want. 864 00:42:14,320 --> 00:42:16,000 Speaker 1: When it comes to fitness people, more is not better, 865 00:42:16,320 --> 00:42:19,359 Speaker 1: More is not necessarily better. Variation is better, right, And 866 00:42:19,400 --> 00:42:21,560 Speaker 1: when you have a kid that's playing a bunch of sports, 867 00:42:21,560 --> 00:42:24,120 Speaker 1: they are learning so many different things. And let's let's 868 00:42:24,160 --> 00:42:26,680 Speaker 1: end up with this. So the unstructured play, we were 869 00:42:26,680 --> 00:42:28,680 Speaker 1: talking about it really quickly. But you know, I grew 870 00:42:28,760 --> 00:42:31,080 Speaker 1: up playing pond hockey. I grew up playing with someone 871 00:42:31,120 --> 00:42:33,279 Speaker 1: we have in common, Mike. We talked about talked about 872 00:42:33,320 --> 00:42:35,520 Speaker 1: a J. Molesco. She was like your daughter at the 873 00:42:35,520 --> 00:42:37,560 Speaker 1: New Canaan Winter Club. We should have a thing called 874 00:42:37,560 --> 00:42:40,399 Speaker 1: partition called a tish and it was basically they would 875 00:42:40,440 --> 00:42:42,919 Speaker 1: take a bunch of hockey sticks third of the ice 876 00:42:43,160 --> 00:42:45,400 Speaker 1: and if you were two years old or twenty two 877 00:42:45,480 --> 00:42:48,040 Speaker 1: years old, you went in there and you played, and 878 00:42:48,160 --> 00:42:50,280 Speaker 1: you got really good because they were pucks flying around 879 00:42:50,280 --> 00:42:53,719 Speaker 1: your head and it was just free play, unstructured and 880 00:42:53,800 --> 00:42:56,160 Speaker 1: to your point again for another show, like if teams 881 00:42:56,160 --> 00:42:58,960 Speaker 1: are lopsided as kids, you know what kids do, they 882 00:42:59,000 --> 00:43:02,200 Speaker 1: make them even because kids don't want to win tendon. 883 00:43:02,280 --> 00:43:05,839 Speaker 1: It's not fun to win tend nothing. So what Mike 884 00:43:05,920 --> 00:43:08,120 Speaker 1: and I talked about is two takeaways, right, Michael, real 885 00:43:08,200 --> 00:43:10,759 Speaker 1: quickly play a bunch of different sports and have a 886 00:43:10,760 --> 00:43:12,520 Speaker 1: lot of free time to play and get good on 887 00:43:12,560 --> 00:43:15,880 Speaker 1: your own pretty sacer like set up. I said, the 888 00:43:15,960 --> 00:43:18,080 Speaker 1: number one thing you can do for your kids set 889 00:43:18,120 --> 00:43:20,400 Speaker 1: up your backyard as a play area. Have them. You know, 890 00:43:20,440 --> 00:43:22,200 Speaker 1: I constantly I have a shooting area with the net, 891 00:43:22,320 --> 00:43:24,600 Speaker 1: I have a across net I have and I'm constantly, 892 00:43:24,600 --> 00:43:27,160 Speaker 1: you know, trying to set up situations where the kids 893 00:43:27,200 --> 00:43:31,520 Speaker 1: can play and have fun and still be doing sports stuff. 894 00:43:31,520 --> 00:43:36,960 Speaker 1: But play means no parents. Let's leave it at that. 895 00:43:36,960 --> 00:43:39,279 Speaker 1: That's the perfect ways to uh, thank you, so much. 896 00:43:39,320 --> 00:43:41,600 Speaker 1: I mean again, we gotta do this again. But you know, 897 00:43:41,680 --> 00:43:43,920 Speaker 1: super helpful for people if if you truly want your 898 00:43:43,960 --> 00:43:46,120 Speaker 1: kid to not only be a good kid, but a 899 00:43:46,160 --> 00:43:48,880 Speaker 1: good athlete and the two let's be honest, hopefully you're 900 00:43:48,920 --> 00:43:54,439 Speaker 1: not mutually exclusive. Uh. Another show, but thank you so much, 901 00:43:54,440 --> 00:43:56,439 Speaker 1: and I definitely have you back, Mike. Thanks for taking 902 00:43:56,440 --> 00:43:59,600 Speaker 1: the time. You're welcome out here, all right, I have 903 00:43:59,640 --> 00:44:03,080 Speaker 1: a great take it easy, have a great day. Thanks, Mike. Thanks. 904 00:44:10,920 --> 00:44:13,200 Speaker 1: I think I say it's just about every show, and 905 00:44:13,239 --> 00:44:16,080 Speaker 1: it's usually after an interview with someone like Mike Boyle 906 00:44:16,600 --> 00:44:21,320 Speaker 1: how much I love my job. And guess what started 907 00:44:21,320 --> 00:44:23,080 Speaker 1: the show by talking about my two boys. Am I 908 00:44:23,200 --> 00:44:27,120 Speaker 1: perfect with them? Nope? Do I need to make some changes? Absolutely? 909 00:44:28,880 --> 00:44:33,759 Speaker 1: And that's okay. That's what this show is supposed to do, 910 00:44:33,920 --> 00:44:36,840 Speaker 1: is make us all uncomfortable. I'm not perfect, Mike Boil 911 00:44:36,920 --> 00:44:40,520 Speaker 1: is not perfect talked about that too. But we should 912 00:44:40,719 --> 00:44:43,879 Speaker 1: be trying to seek out the best information this show. 913 00:44:44,400 --> 00:44:49,239 Speaker 1: We should be open to other ways of thinking so 914 00:44:49,280 --> 00:44:51,040 Speaker 1: we can all be the best. I've said that so 915 00:44:51,120 --> 00:44:54,080 Speaker 1: many times in my career. I don't want to be right. 916 00:44:54,120 --> 00:44:57,000 Speaker 1: I want to be the best I can be. And 917 00:44:58,200 --> 00:45:01,960 Speaker 1: listening to a guy like Mike Boyle is the way 918 00:45:02,000 --> 00:45:06,719 Speaker 1: to do it, and sure makes us his parents uncomfortable, 919 00:45:06,719 --> 00:45:08,359 Speaker 1: but well, I'm not quite doing all those things. It's 920 00:45:08,440 --> 00:45:11,319 Speaker 1: that's okay now, you know, if you didn't know, if 921 00:45:11,320 --> 00:45:15,400 Speaker 1: you're surprised and these we're not just making this. This 922 00:45:15,440 --> 00:45:19,200 Speaker 1: isn't our philosophy quote unquote. It's actually if you study 923 00:45:19,520 --> 00:45:22,279 Speaker 1: professional athletes what they did when they were kids, if 924 00:45:22,280 --> 00:45:26,440 Speaker 1: you actually look at countries like Norway where teams thrive 925 00:45:26,719 --> 00:45:30,240 Speaker 1: without playing and keeping score until you know the teens, 926 00:45:30,920 --> 00:45:33,400 Speaker 1: it's not about winning. It's not about games. It's about 927 00:45:33,640 --> 00:45:41,160 Speaker 1: skill acquisition. It's about making the kids better people players 928 00:45:41,960 --> 00:45:44,560 Speaker 1: and not just winning. And it's not about specializing at 929 00:45:44,600 --> 00:45:47,520 Speaker 1: a young age. That's not that. That's not if you say, oh, yeah, 930 00:45:47,520 --> 00:45:49,400 Speaker 1: well that would be easier. It would actually be easier. 931 00:45:49,440 --> 00:45:51,680 Speaker 1: If that were the secret, most people would do that. 932 00:45:51,760 --> 00:45:53,719 Speaker 1: Think about it. This is not playing the guitar, and 933 00:45:53,760 --> 00:45:57,120 Speaker 1: even then skill acquisition, there's there's so much more involved. 934 00:45:57,520 --> 00:46:00,279 Speaker 1: You burn your kid out pretty easily, pretty quickly, and 935 00:46:00,360 --> 00:46:03,719 Speaker 1: most many, many parents are doing just that. So I 936 00:46:03,800 --> 00:46:07,320 Speaker 1: love my job. I love this show. I love talking 937 00:46:07,360 --> 00:46:10,200 Speaker 1: to people like Mike Boyle. Now, obviously I'm biased because 938 00:46:10,200 --> 00:46:12,279 Speaker 1: I have the same exact philosophy as him, much of 939 00:46:12,320 --> 00:46:16,600 Speaker 1: it because I started off learning from him and then 940 00:46:16,760 --> 00:46:20,920 Speaker 1: developed my philosophy that's very similar to his, almost exact. 941 00:46:21,000 --> 00:46:24,480 Speaker 1: It is exactly because we look at the science, we 942 00:46:24,560 --> 00:46:27,399 Speaker 1: look at the statistics, and we take all of these 943 00:46:27,440 --> 00:46:31,120 Speaker 1: different things into play and take our biases out and 944 00:46:31,160 --> 00:46:35,160 Speaker 1: take our our our egos out, because it's not about us. 945 00:46:35,160 --> 00:46:38,000 Speaker 1: If it's a kids sports, it's about the kids. And 946 00:46:38,040 --> 00:46:39,840 Speaker 1: I was honest, you know, it was a little extreme 947 00:46:39,840 --> 00:46:42,320 Speaker 1: when I said, you know, we're in Canada and got 948 00:46:42,760 --> 00:46:45,320 Speaker 1: killed and my kid, you know, didn't win a game. 949 00:46:46,280 --> 00:46:48,399 Speaker 1: And obviously it wasn't happy that we want you never want. 950 00:46:48,440 --> 00:46:50,800 Speaker 1: You can't lose by too much, and that will obviously 951 00:46:51,040 --> 00:46:54,560 Speaker 1: degrade a child self esteem. But it wasn't that way. 952 00:46:54,719 --> 00:46:57,560 Speaker 1: Just it was a little less extreme than that. My 953 00:46:57,640 --> 00:47:00,879 Speaker 1: point was, it's not about ding, it's about the kids 954 00:47:00,880 --> 00:47:04,759 Speaker 1: getting better. And my son just happens to be someone 955 00:47:04,760 --> 00:47:07,960 Speaker 1: who loves the competition. He doesn't care about the score 956 00:47:07,960 --> 00:47:09,640 Speaker 1: by and large. Yes, of course he wants to win, 957 00:47:09,960 --> 00:47:13,480 Speaker 1: but he gets it, he understands because God knows, we 958 00:47:13,520 --> 00:47:17,320 Speaker 1: talked about it enough smart, and he wants to be 959 00:47:17,360 --> 00:47:18,960 Speaker 1: the best player he can be, and he trusts me. 960 00:47:19,160 --> 00:47:21,239 Speaker 1: And you know what, it's a great way to wrap 961 00:47:21,320 --> 00:47:23,560 Speaker 1: this show up because it's about trust. I used to 962 00:47:23,560 --> 00:47:25,400 Speaker 1: say that to my clients when I was a personal 963 00:47:25,400 --> 00:47:27,879 Speaker 1: trainer and coach, the to trust me when you read 964 00:47:27,920 --> 00:47:30,160 Speaker 1: my books, and a lot of people read the books. 965 00:47:30,200 --> 00:47:33,120 Speaker 1: They goes, isn't enough. They don't trust me, they don't 966 00:47:33,160 --> 00:47:39,560 Speaker 1: trust the process. And this show we're gonna have people 967 00:47:39,600 --> 00:47:41,600 Speaker 1: like Mike Boyle was thinking about this. We have a 968 00:47:41,640 --> 00:47:46,239 Speaker 1: handful of shows now and there's the same theme emerging 969 00:47:46,280 --> 00:47:48,479 Speaker 1: people from people who are really good at what they do. 970 00:47:49,239 --> 00:47:52,520 Speaker 1: What it might say, show up, consistency. It's not about 971 00:47:52,560 --> 00:47:57,279 Speaker 1: these fancy workouts, are fancy diets or crazy supplements or 972 00:47:57,520 --> 00:48:04,160 Speaker 1: crazy recovery techniques, show up, do the work, keep it simple. 973 00:48:04,440 --> 00:48:08,640 Speaker 1: And that goes for our kids, even more so than ourselves. 974 00:48:09,840 --> 00:48:15,759 Speaker 1: So I've said enough what and just honor and privilege, 975 00:48:15,800 --> 00:48:18,840 Speaker 1: and and you know what, I'm that much better today 976 00:48:19,120 --> 00:48:22,000 Speaker 1: having spoken with Mike Boyle, and you are that much 977 00:48:22,000 --> 00:48:26,239 Speaker 1: better having listened to him. And now let's all try 978 00:48:26,239 --> 00:48:31,840 Speaker 1: and apply the principles that will help our kids and 979 00:48:31,920 --> 00:48:37,640 Speaker 1: not our egos, it's delayed gratification. And if you truly, 980 00:48:37,680 --> 00:48:40,360 Speaker 1: if you have a kid who's showing promise and passion, 981 00:48:40,400 --> 00:48:43,160 Speaker 1: as Mike said in a Sport, the best thing you 982 00:48:43,200 --> 00:48:47,080 Speaker 1: can do is apply the information and the knowledge that 983 00:48:47,360 --> 00:48:51,800 Speaker 1: Mike just gave you. That's what you should do. Awesome. 984 00:48:52,280 --> 00:48:56,560 Speaker 1: I am Tom Holland. Thank you for listening. Please, if 985 00:48:56,560 --> 00:49:00,759 Speaker 1: you have some extra time, rate the show. We've some comments. 986 00:49:01,840 --> 00:49:07,239 Speaker 1: I appreciate it. Share the show with your friends. Thank 987 00:49:07,280 --> 00:49:11,000 Speaker 1: you for listening and hopefully trusting. And I'm just here 988 00:49:11,040 --> 00:49:14,759 Speaker 1: to help you have your best life. I'm here to 989 00:49:14,840 --> 00:49:17,560 Speaker 1: help us all enjoy it as much as we can. 990 00:49:18,719 --> 00:49:21,960 Speaker 1: Look better, feel better, live longer. Thank you for listening. 991 00:49:22,040 --> 00:49:31,520 Speaker 1: I'm Tom Holland and believe in yourself. Fitness Disrupted is 992 00:49:31,560 --> 00:49:35,040 Speaker 1: a production of I Heart Radio. For more podcasts from 993 00:49:35,040 --> 00:49:38,759 Speaker 1: my Heart Radio, visit the I heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, 994 00:49:39,040 --> 00:49:41,200 Speaker 1: or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.