Speaker 1: Hello, Hello, Welcome to the Unofficial Expert Podcast.
Speaker 2: Hi guys, it's Marie and Sydney.
Speaker 3: What up girl? Are you doing?
Speaker 2: Oh? You know, I'm a little tired, but I'm getting through.
Speaker 2: I wanted to say that you look tired. You got
Speaker 2: a lot of nerve with your headscarf on. Wow, you
Speaker 2: left your house with your house face and came.
Speaker 3: To my house.
Speaker 2: This is my house. Okay, that couch. Welcome to my house.
Speaker 3: Oh my god, I hate that song where it's Marie's house.
Speaker 3: Welcome to my house.
Speaker 4: Sydney s leaves on my.
Speaker 3: In tie. Who Finney, what the hell are you an
Speaker 3: expert in this week?
Speaker 2: What's okay? I was an expert in being there for
Speaker 2: a friend. That sounds like something you've been an expert
Speaker 2: in several times.
Speaker 1: Okay, well it's not my fault if I'm a good
Speaker 1: shelter to cry on and lean on. Okay, don't be
Speaker 1: mad because nobody be calling you up. Save the no better.
Speaker 2: My phone is on do not disturb. Oh my god,
Speaker 2: you picking up?
Speaker 1: She I am your dearest friend and you have me
Speaker 1: on do not disturb And I'm like.
Speaker 4: You've been calling me at inconvenient times, like like Batman hours,
Speaker 4: Like when the bats are up, I'd be like, you know, today,
Speaker 4: I'm not doing this with you today.
Speaker 2: This is what happens. I will call you, text you nothing.
Speaker 3: Right. Then I'll see you on Instagram like like la
Speaker 3: la la la la.
Speaker 2: You'll be liking should just just sold you so I
Speaker 2: know that you're on I got interact with my fans anyway.
Speaker 3: You were like, hey girl, some people you.
Speaker 4: Don't even know I copy and paste coming, you know,
Speaker 4: let me not say that because people that's what some
Speaker 4: of the people.
Speaker 2: Listening I comment too.
Speaker 3: You're like, yes, squee, and.
Speaker 2: It'll be like a picture of somebody's like funeral pamphlet. Yes,
Speaker 2: And they'd be like.
Speaker 1: So, anyway, I was an expert at being a good friend.
Speaker 1: A friend was in some some real desperate time. I
Speaker 1: will not but I had to put a friend in
Speaker 1: my over account. Oh yeah, I usually don't do that
Speaker 1: because one time I did that and a friend threw
Speaker 1: us spilled his Hennessy out out of his Coca Cola can,
Speaker 1: and then they charged me one hundred dollars for the.
Speaker 2: It smells disgusting. They put hen set in a Coca
Speaker 2: Cola cane. Yes, they did don't was this friend going
Speaker 2: brought me? What friend this is? But just know it
Speaker 2: starts with a J and it was ends with an S.
Speaker 2: Jonas Jons.
Speaker 1: His name is Jonas and we work together and he
Speaker 1: doesn't he your boss?
Speaker 2: No, damn girl. Oh I'm thinking of the other. Okay,
Speaker 2: all right, well never mind. You know what, Mari, Well,
Speaker 2: don't you know what white Jonas and a black Jonas I.
Speaker 3: Do in my phone?
Speaker 1: In my phone it's a W Jonas and a B
Speaker 1: Jonas well, black Jonas because it's Tennessee, right.
Speaker 2: So I had to put a friend and my uber.
Speaker 1: I didn't put them in an uber pool because that's
Speaker 1: how great I am. The problem is the cab was
Speaker 1: fifty dollars in thirty three cents, girl, And I was like,
Speaker 1: why do you think that for myself?
Speaker 3: Oh? I walk my friend to the train and give
Speaker 3: them a swipe.
Speaker 1: Make when you wait, Marie, when you were high on edibles,
Speaker 1: when you were fucked up, you didn't even want to
Speaker 1: put yourself in your own cab.
Speaker 2: Jef, you were like, I walk home, It's fine.
Speaker 3: I was like, what is this? So?
Speaker 2: How many how many blocks? Sonnets? Yeah?
Speaker 3: They get home?
Speaker 1: So I put him in my cab and then I'm
Speaker 1: watching the thing because I need to see when he
Speaker 1: gets out so I can get in because I don't
Speaker 1: care about my money, right, I got a couple of
Speaker 1: checks that cleared bits.
Speaker 3: I was like, let's do this uber x v I P.
Speaker 2: You just got yourself security money. Okay, So he gets in.
Speaker 1: I'm thinking the whole time, I'm like, fifty dollars thirty
Speaker 1: three cents? Should I send him a Venmo request for
Speaker 1: at least half Yes. He gets out halfway through the trip,
Speaker 1: and I'm upset because I'm like, yo, you're supposed to
Speaker 1: be going home.
Speaker 3: But the other side, I was like, well.
Speaker 1: I'm going to pay thirty dollars instead of fifty dollars
Speaker 1: and thirty to thirty cents.
Speaker 3: Yeah, you're mad, but.
Speaker 1: I'm a good friend, Like you would never give your
Speaker 1: Uber account to any not even me.
Speaker 4: I'd be like, let me log out of my phone
Speaker 4: so you can log into your account on my poe.
Speaker 1: I shouldn't say this on the podcast because now people
Speaker 1: are gonna be pretending that they're in desperate need of
Speaker 1: an Uber and they're gonna be using my damn account.
Speaker 3: Well that just makes you.
Speaker 2: Dumb, right, no, you wouldn't do that.
Speaker 3: You gotta do it.
Speaker 2: If your friend is in need, you got to help them.
Speaker 3: I'd be like, give me your phone for me. That's
Speaker 3: what I said to you.
Speaker 2: That's exactly what you did to me. So don't act
Speaker 2: like the other person is more your phone. Shut up, friends,
Speaker 2: and I put you in an uberpool though. I was like,
Speaker 2: you know what, at least somebody else will take care
Speaker 2: of you. Shut up.
Speaker 4: I remember that day too, because I woke up in
Speaker 4: the uber and I was like, I've been in this
Speaker 4: uber for legit two hours, and I was like I
Speaker 4: was by myself with the driver. I didn't know where
Speaker 4: I was. And I was like, Sydney, why did you
Speaker 4: leave me? When I called you? And you were like
Speaker 4: I was never in the uber with hues. Those were
Speaker 4: all little white women. And I was like, wow, she
Speaker 4: sounded a lot like you. And then remember I threw
Speaker 4: up in.
Speaker 2: The uber you did and turned and the driver pulled
Speaker 2: over to get some tissue or condoms or whatever, and
Speaker 2: I was like, Sydney, I don't know where I am.
Speaker 3: I told him that you were a famous comedian.
Speaker 2: I was like, get that money, boot, and then I uh,
Speaker 2: the driver was like we're on Myrtle Ave or whatever.
Speaker 3: And I looked up and we were right in front
Speaker 3: of my ex boyfriend's house. Wow.
Speaker 2: And then I was like, yeah, it's not the location
Speaker 2: that I had put in, but maybe that's where your
Speaker 2: heart was trying to take you.
Speaker 3: That's just where I threw up.
Speaker 1: Your heart was trying to take you there, girl, shut up,
Speaker 1: it was meant to be.
Speaker 2: I have no heart, a little a little black stone.
Speaker 3: In my chest. Sure.
Speaker 2: What were you an expert in this week?
Speaker 4: Mainly I was an expert for not being prepared for
Speaker 4: doing this, But I I feel like I was an
Speaker 4: expert at.
Speaker 3: I had it and then it went away. Are you
Speaker 3: talking about a baby?
Speaker 4: No, man, I'm not talking about no baby. You said
Speaker 4: I was an expert at not having a baby. Okay,
Speaker 4: I had not having children, living my best life, you
Speaker 4: know what I mean? Uh, staying out all day and
Speaker 4: not eating because I have food in my fridge.
Speaker 3: And I'm one of.
Speaker 4: These people that's like, I'm not paying for outside food
Speaker 4: when I have inside food.
Speaker 3: That's true. I was an expert at saving I.
Speaker 2: Don't know twelve dollars this week.
Speaker 4: I don't know how much money I saved but I
Speaker 4: feel like I've been spending a lot more money on
Speaker 4: food and drinks and stuff because you're my biggest fear
Speaker 4: of spending money outside.
Speaker 1: First of all, listeners, Marie does not pay for drinks.
Speaker 1: Just want you to know that she pays for food
Speaker 1: but not drinks, Sydney.
Speaker 3: Sometimes I be paying for my own lemonades.
Speaker 4: Okay, I don't pay for my alcohol, right, but I
Speaker 4: paid for my non alcohol beverages.
Speaker 2: They'd be like, you're drinking ginger beer. Okay, well here
Speaker 2: here it's five dollars and I'm like, somebody here to
Speaker 2: add some room to this.
Speaker 1: You'll have a Coca Cola can of rum like my
Speaker 1: friend jonas a road Hennessy.
Speaker 4: Yes, Sidney, this is this is is getting too black
Speaker 4: for me uptown.
Speaker 3: Okay, sorry, I don't like Hennessy is disgusting.
Speaker 2: Well, an expert at you know that.
Speaker 1: So that's it just saving money.
Speaker 2: I guess next week I'll be more prepared with what
Speaker 2: I was an expert at. I was, Listen, I was
Speaker 2: an expert at greasing my scalp mussage in my edges,
Speaker 2: which that's a really dry Sidney.
Speaker 3: Your faull lock is falling in definitely is. It's legit
Speaker 3: London Bridge, but it's really dread.
Speaker 2: My dread bridge is falling down.
Speaker 1: For your locks are I'm taking them out tomorrow and
Speaker 1: I hope you be a good friend and help me
Speaker 1: take them out.
Speaker 3: I'm probably not going to be a good friend.
Speaker 1: That's fine, speaking of a great friend. I love the
Speaker 1: yes that we have today. I mean literally all over
Speaker 1: your TV screen, everywhere, all over the country, all over
Speaker 1: the world.
Speaker 4: I feel like his passport got some stamps in it.
Speaker 2: No, and weren't you in Australia.
Speaker 5: No, I just Italy and France. That's what I went
Speaker 5: to France because.
Speaker 3: We're doing guess we didn't even introduce you, Lja Manelli.
Speaker 2: He's a comedian, he's a writer. Uh you're what else?
Speaker 3: Faggot?
Speaker 1: Oh no, we don't say that word on this pogaying
Speaker 1: here for the next three hours.
Speaker 4: We'll go ahead and say that. Do you live your truth?
Speaker 4: He is our diva expert. It's a mateo Lane mitail Lane.
Speaker 3: Hey, guys to say fagot.
Speaker 4: I mean whatever you want, Maia, don't let this lesbian
Speaker 4: censor you.
Speaker 3: I mean I wouldn't. I wouldn't have cared either.
Speaker 2: I know you don't.
Speaker 3: You don't give any damn I would.
Speaker 1: All right, you got your best four arms out right now,
Speaker 1: you don't care what I have to say.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 4: Wait, so but you do a lot of things. You're
Speaker 4: a comic, yeah, but you also are an artist.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 5: I was a fashion illustrator and storyboard artists for television
Speaker 5: commercials for years. And I say that I lived in
Speaker 5: Italy painting, yeah, like portraits and landscapes, and I was.
Speaker 3: Like a full blown working artist.
Speaker 5: That was my whole life, and everything was built for
Speaker 5: that career. And then just one day it was like,
Speaker 5: I think I'd rather tell some jokes in a basement
Speaker 5: and than in the blink of an eye, I am
Speaker 5: now killing jokes.
Speaker 2: That's great. You gave up all that for this.
Speaker 5: I still do it, you know, Like I wrote my
Speaker 5: own cartoon show that I'm pitching next month, and.
Speaker 3: Bob the drag Queen and I are going to do.
Speaker 5: A comic strip about like a drag queen superhero, and
Speaker 5: so I still incorporate it, but just in ways that
Speaker 5: it's more useful to me.
Speaker 3: Now, that's beautiful. Well, listen, when you're work looking for.
Speaker 5: A storeboard artists, it's cool, but Also it's like you
Speaker 5: just have like some gay art director being like.
Speaker 3: It's like, all right, fine.
Speaker 5: It was for GSW Sky, which I'm sure is not
Speaker 5: his birth name.
Speaker 1: You've never met a Sky, a man, and I'm met
Speaker 1: a guy named Sky. My manager at Dinosaur Barbecue in
Speaker 1: Harlem was named Scott Dinosaurbee.
Speaker 3: Yesterday was going to go to Dinosaur Barbecue. They were like,
Speaker 3: We're gonna go to Dinosaur Barbecue and I was like,
Speaker 3: I was like, well, that's easy to remember because it's
Speaker 3: a ridiculous name.
Speaker 4: It's like the Flintstones. Yeah, Sidney, you used to work
Speaker 4: at Dinosaur Barbecue. I don't really tell people that I
Speaker 4: was a host.
Speaker 5: I used to work at Michael's and I was fired
Speaker 5: and the store. You're stealing everything everything. That's what you
Speaker 5: should do.
Speaker 2: If you're an employee, you should steal.
Speaker 3: Michaels was asking for it though, free job I've ever had.
Speaker 2: I stole something when I was bargaining too.
Speaker 3: Then like a part of the job. When I was bargaining,
Speaker 3: I was stealing bottles.
Speaker 2: Of grey Goose, like I was taking like the big
Speaker 2: bottle of things.
Speaker 1: Don't work out in comedy. You really funding it up
Speaker 1: right now? People are gonna be like, uh.
Speaker 3: She steals, yes, but I don't steal jokes though.
Speaker 2: I won't name names, but whisper initials.
Speaker 1: Just writing on a piece of paper for us the
Speaker 1: record in French.
Speaker 2: I'm gonna say you also speak a bunch of languages too.
Speaker 4: You mad cultured, you really are, I know. But I
Speaker 4: like you because you like what we like. Like you
Speaker 4: like messy?
Speaker 3: Uh? Two women celebrities, Yeah, divas, messy divas.
Speaker 2: Who's your favorite diva?
Speaker 5: Well, my favorite is an opera singer named Maria Kallas
Speaker 5: who don't know who it is. I know, no one
Speaker 5: knows who is unless you're a real old gay. But
Speaker 5: she was like the ultimate cunt and the ultimate diva.
Speaker 5: I mean, she was amazing.
Speaker 3: She had the makeover, she had the voice, she had,
Speaker 3: the drama. She had. The early death, Yeah.
Speaker 2: The early death.
Speaker 3: I need that. Died at fifty three.
Speaker 5: Once her love of her life, Aristotle NASAs, who left
Speaker 5: her after she got an abortion for him for another woman.
Speaker 5: Once he died, she never left her Paris apartment again
Speaker 5: and was taking ups and downs and died of a
Speaker 5: heart attack.
Speaker 2: That's scandalous. That's such a like a she.
Speaker 5: He was being interviewed because she was the world's greatest singer,
Speaker 5: like technically, there's no one better than her ever. And
Speaker 5: she was being interviewed and someone goes, what do you
Speaker 5: think of your rivals? And she goes, oh, I don't
Speaker 5: mean to correct you, but I don't have rhymes. I
Speaker 5: was like, all right, gay icon right there, that's all
Speaker 5: it takes to be a gay icon.
Speaker 2: Why do you get people like people like that so much?
Speaker 5: A men love a lot of women with attitude because
Speaker 5: I think there was a long time we weren't represented
Speaker 5: in television or media or anything, and so I think
Speaker 5: it's the closest thing to seeing ourselves and also women
Speaker 5: being oppressed, especially Black women who are very, very, very
Speaker 5: strong in the gay community. I think we just saw
Speaker 5: a lot of ourselves in them, and that was the
Speaker 5: only way we could see ourselves. Also, something about like
Speaker 5: being able to mimic like stry Sand and Liza Minelli
Speaker 5: and you know, Patty and Whitney, like they're easy to mimic,
Speaker 5: and so there was almost like a I don't know,
Speaker 5: they're like a kind.
Speaker 3: Of a caricature. You can you can mimic Patty.
Speaker 5: Okay, go get me a giant eyelash. I'll put it
Speaker 5: on my head and I will sing somewhere over the.
Speaker 2: Rainbow to can you sing a Little Give Me a
Speaker 2: Little Sand?
Speaker 3: That's every Patty song. Patty starts at a ten and plateaus.
Speaker 5: I mean, it's like she's the only, like, honestly, and
Speaker 5: I have to say, getting into divas, Patty is the
Speaker 5: only besides her and stry Sand, They're the only consistent divas,
Speaker 5: you know what I mean, Like Whitney Houston. Mariah has
Speaker 5: disappointed me more than Whitney Houston and Whitney Easton died.
Speaker 5: You know, It's like it's like all these divas just
Speaker 5: go tumbling and Patty has maintained it.
Speaker 2: Patty, did you have any of the Patty Pies?
Speaker 3: I've never had a Patty pie.
Speaker 1: First of all, you should. And Patty has cobbler, and
Speaker 1: the cobbler is.
Speaker 3: All thief che where god a blueberry piece?
Speaker 1: Where is there's peach and then there's peach and then
Speaker 1: there's like an apple one?
Speaker 4: Yes, but did the pie dude do a video on
Speaker 4: the cobbler, because otherwise.
Speaker 2: The cobbler came after. The cobbler came after.
Speaker 5: Okay, See, I think I love Patty because she actually
Speaker 5: she's been saying forever that she cooks.
Speaker 3: She loves cooking. Like that's not some bullshit she pulled out.
Speaker 5: She's like, I cook and someone throws like a cookbook
Speaker 5: with her. Like since the sixties, she's been talking about
Speaker 5: her macaroni and cheese.
Speaker 3: She's been talking about all her food, crabcakes.
Speaker 5: Oh yeah, I said, I unfortunately know everything about these
Speaker 5: fucking divas.
Speaker 4: But Aretha's like, well, I'll make a croissant, you know, Aretha,
Speaker 4: get over here.
Speaker 5: Aretha is the biggest fucking shadiest woman on the face
Speaker 5: of the planet.
Speaker 2: Should be shady though, keyword being biggest.
Speaker 3: First of all, her eyes.
Speaker 1: Her eyes are very snuffles okay, very drowsy eye.
Speaker 3: She's you ever seen in her fur coat? It is
Speaker 3: snuffle up.
Speaker 4: Against she performed at like the White House or something.
Speaker 5: Yeah, Kennedy's not her honor and then she just rips
Speaker 5: it off, which with those arms and the confidence to
Speaker 5: have them screaming.
Speaker 3: Natural woman. But I have to say, lock.
Speaker 2: On, major Woma, you better do it. Sydney sound great.
Speaker 5: Did you ever see the one that Kelly Clarkson did
Speaker 5: where she jumped into a whistle tone.
Speaker 3: No, no, oh, it's really good.
Speaker 2: Do you feel about Kelly Clarkson.
Speaker 5: I actually think she's one of the few people who
Speaker 5: can still sing.
Speaker 1: I mean, was she's still big, that's why, uh when
Speaker 1: she lost weight, when she got to skinny, the skinny Kelly,
Speaker 1: I will people weren't really fucking with her like that.
Speaker 2: They were like, nah, you gotta get some more weight
Speaker 2: on you.
Speaker 5: And then she's like you got I will meet you.
Speaker 5: There's like she ran.
Speaker 2: Red in Patty's house.
Speaker 5: But Kelly can sing in chest tones up into like
Speaker 5: a F and a G those notes and then that's high.
Speaker 3: A G five is super.
Speaker 5: High, the highest note that you could hear, the highest
Speaker 5: note in your chest tones, like the highest. Probably Patty's
Speaker 5: gotten her voice up to like a bee without mixing,
Speaker 5: which is like wildly high. But Patty and Wretha both
Speaker 5: have like a kind of mix in their belt. So
Speaker 5: like an actual belter, like a G and A are.
Speaker 2: Like super actual belter.
Speaker 3: Barbara is like a belter.
Speaker 5: I don't know a single Barbara stand is like her belting,
Speaker 5: especially when she was like in her twenties.
Speaker 3: Is Patty the bell said the other?
Speaker 5: Was it Patty the bell or someone else was doing
Speaker 5: an interview about how they were saying back in the day,
Speaker 5: no white woman could sing and her mother goes, no
Speaker 5: white woman could sing it except for streisand.
Speaker 2: Like she Barbara still hold that right now?
Speaker 3: Yeah, she's seventy four and sounds great. What about something?
Speaker 5: I love that cuckoo, messy French Canadian whirlwind of a ride.
Speaker 3: I mean that cuckoo. She is the she is.
Speaker 2: That's fair, that's fair.
Speaker 3: No, she was cuckoo from day one.
Speaker 5: First of all, she's the most uncomfortable person to watch
Speaker 5: on an interview because she doesn't understand American humor, so
Speaker 5: like when you're trying to talk to her, she's she's
Speaker 5: constantly like its great fun me Like it's like like Celene,
Speaker 5: you know, it's like really uncomfortable. And then she had
Speaker 5: like the thing is, she had that son a long
Speaker 5: time ago, who like literally started off as one of
Speaker 5: the ugliest things I've ever seen.
Speaker 3: And then okay, no he was good looking. I mean,
Speaker 3: who is this for?
Speaker 5: And you've seen him when he's now look him up.
Speaker 5: Now he is one of the most beautiful. He is
Speaker 5: so beautiful. Oh yes, But there was also Selene's fault
Speaker 5: She's like, I'll let my chot, my four year old
Speaker 5: boy's hair grow to the ground and wear like white blankets.
Speaker 5: He looks like the ring, like a clean a clean
Speaker 5: ring though a cleaner cleaner, cleaner, cleaner ring.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 2: I like Celine Dion.
Speaker 3: Oh.
Speaker 5: I love her because she maintains her voice, so you say,
Speaker 5: but oh yeah. He gave her an award for like
Speaker 5: American Music Awards, like a couple months ago, and it
Speaker 5: was so sweet. I actually really love her because she
Speaker 5: really is like a good mother, a good person, and
Speaker 5: she was crying and I can't say enough good things
Speaker 5: about it.
Speaker 1: He looks like a step below one direction, like if
Speaker 1: he got a little bit of work done, he would
Speaker 1: be very one.
Speaker 5: He's also eighteen when he looks like you need some
Speaker 5: Chris White trips.
Speaker 3: This is all that I'm gonna say about him.
Speaker 2: Yeah, he's cute.
Speaker 4: He do kind of look like he looks like like
Speaker 4: a Jared Letto lights.
Speaker 3: Yeah, very Jared Letto as That's very true.
Speaker 5: So Selene, I'm four, Selena, I'm fo Patty, I'm for Mariah.
Speaker 5: I am so upset, speak on it, speak on this
Speaker 5: Mariah seven hours. I don't know where to begin First
Speaker 5: of all, get rid of your manager Stella, she's running
Speaker 5: your career. Number two, get yourself cleaned up and fire
Speaker 5: everybody around you.
Speaker 3: What do you think that Mariah's on. I think she's
Speaker 3: on pills, weed and drinking.
Speaker 1: She's on pills heavy, Yeah, because she's heavy pills.
Speaker 5: Sleepy sleeps when she's in interviews and she just can't
Speaker 5: sing anymore. She was singing Vision of Love and it
Speaker 5: was like this like a week ago, and oh my god,
Speaker 5: it was atrocious. I thought, you're one of the most
Speaker 5: renowned singers in the world, and now you're forty five
Speaker 5: wearing a Keith Signierra dress. She's struggling. It's like, girl,
Speaker 5: we know you have. First of all, I don't know
Speaker 5: who she's dressing sexy for. I've been her concerts seven times,
Speaker 5: felt nothing every time, and every one of that concert
Speaker 5: is a gay man or a black woman. Who is
Speaker 5: she trying to fuck? I was like, no one here
Speaker 5: is interested in you just want to hear you sing. Well,
Speaker 5: she's not doing a.
Speaker 3: Good she will don't want to still feel it.
Speaker 2: She will saran wrap that body, throwing a waist trainer.
Speaker 3: And she's wearing a fruit roll up put on a.
Speaker 1: I'm surprised she hasn't done those tummy tea little things
Speaker 1: on Instagram.
Speaker 3: What's that a tummy tea?
Speaker 2: You drink the tea and it's supposed to flatten your tummy,
Speaker 2: but it just.
Speaker 3: Makes you like, it just makes you hours and days
Speaker 3: and years.
Speaker 5: Oh that sounds horrible. So it just gets rid of
Speaker 5: some bloating, is what it does. It doesn't actually do ship.
Speaker 5: She's super blood because she need it. She didn't drinking
Speaker 5: retaining water. And that's what Wendy says. You know, I
Speaker 5: know Mariyah loves.
Speaker 3: To have a splash of champagne.
Speaker 2: But Maria, you are crazy girl, Wendy champagne.
Speaker 5: Oh yes, oh yes, oh yes, Mariah is known to
Speaker 5: enjoy a splash.
Speaker 3: Yeah. I mean, first of all, Wendy like when he's
Speaker 3: always like, you know, people say that I don't like Maria,
Speaker 3: and that's not true. But it feels like she hates Mariah. True.
Speaker 4: It doesn't sound seem like she likes Beyonce at all either.
Speaker 4: Wendy doesn't like anybody think Beyonce is a diva.
Speaker 5: Like, oh yeah, she's definitely classified as a diva for sure,
Speaker 5: and diva not in the sense of added diva is
Speaker 5: like how gays view their divas, like she's a hundred
Speaker 5: like diva, but Beyonce as a diva, Like you don't
Speaker 5: really hear much about Beyonce being a bit.
Speaker 3: She don't hear her about being.
Speaker 2: Well people don't talk like you can't talk.
Speaker 3: No, they don't.
Speaker 2: People know.
Speaker 3: It's not that this is not me saying it. This
Speaker 3: is Wendy saying it.
Speaker 4: No, but I'm saying, like the confidentiality clause at the
Speaker 4: Nole's compound must be like iron clad because people do
Speaker 4: not talk.
Speaker 2: Nothing that Beyonce does leaks well.
Speaker 3: Bob the Dragreen is a great joke.
Speaker 5: He's like the most confrontation you've ever seen Beyonce do
Speaker 5: is stand in the elevator while watching someone else fight
Speaker 5: for her, like she doesn't you know. Wendy's always like,
Speaker 5: you know, Beyonce doesn't do any interviews because she's got
Speaker 5: the speaking level of a fifth grader. And it's like,
Speaker 5: I'm not saying that, so don't come after me, beehive,
Speaker 5: but bey I, but Beyonce is like I was talking
Speaker 5: to John Early about this once and we were talking
Speaker 5: about like divas that really do a like Beyonce will
Speaker 5: be successful for the rest of her lize, but for
Speaker 5: the rest of her life, I don't know if she had.
Speaker 3: The same like flash that Whitney Houston.
Speaker 5: Like, Beyonce has just been good, consistently and rising up
Speaker 5: all the way through her career. I mean, she's done
Speaker 5: all the right moves. She looks amazing, she sounds great,
Speaker 5: she's got good music.
Speaker 2: Remember that one photo when she fell out of the
Speaker 2: car drunk.
Speaker 4: Do you remember that, yeahs sitting in the car dress on.
Speaker 2: Ye.
Speaker 3: Good for her, though she pars or something.
Speaker 2: That's what I want to see.
Speaker 3: Want to see more.
Speaker 5: But like Whitney and Mariah were like gigantic, huge flashes
Speaker 5: that like like took the world.
Speaker 1: They have a huge personal I don't think Beyonce has
Speaker 1: a big person outy, but they both work.
Speaker 5: But the thing with Mariah Whitney is they flash big
Speaker 5: and then goes. You know, it's hard, it's.
Speaker 3: Hard to keep up with that. It is hard to
Speaker 3: keep is a lot. Yeah, Yeah, that's.
Speaker 2: Why she's had tous. She doesn't want to do this forever.
Speaker 2: She have these babies finally.
Speaker 3: Well she had that baby.
Speaker 2: She know the twins, you kind of them as one
Speaker 2: baby Maria is saying that she didn't have that. Technically,
Speaker 2: she didn't have.
Speaker 3: A blue eye.
Speaker 5: She lip synced to her birth Now I think agrees. Yeah,
Speaker 5: did you first of all crush thank you crush them.
Speaker 5: And we made my aunt Cindy, who has had four children,
Speaker 5: watch that video and she was like, she pointed out
Speaker 5: something to me besides the crushing part. She goes, when
Speaker 5: you're pregnant, you do not crouch down like this. You
Speaker 5: have to have your back back because you're eight months Pregnanty,
Speaker 5: you cannot sit down like that.
Speaker 3: She's like, I've had four kids. Never once was I
Speaker 3: able to.
Speaker 4: Do right because pregnant women will put their hand back
Speaker 4: and writes, smush down, not this, Sydney.
Speaker 1: I feel like that one video and that's all I need.
Speaker 3: You, baby, I only need that one video.
Speaker 4: Why do you believe that she had because she showed
Speaker 4: a video of like the stomach to the side, like
Speaker 4: she ate a.
Speaker 3: Burrito once and was like, quick, snap a picture.
Speaker 1: And no, I think that that one video. Some people
Speaker 1: want their bumped. Some people bump doesn't develop until really late.
Speaker 2: Until the squishy bumps.
Speaker 3: Shut up.
Speaker 2: No, it's I have a friend who had abs and
Speaker 2: six months pressure.
Speaker 5: Do you have to admit that it's strange with these
Speaker 5: twins that this woman was running around as naked as
Speaker 5: she possibly.
Speaker 2: Because I think she wants to prove to people now,
Speaker 2: she wants to prove that she's no.
Speaker 4: She was taking first time mother photos the entire time
Speaker 4: she was springing it.
Speaker 1: This time it was like flower crown, blue suit. Okay,
Speaker 1: But she's also a different Beyonce. She has evolved. She's
Speaker 1: actually talking about things in musical.
Speaker 3: She don't even Lemonade. She wouldn't even write period. Did
Speaker 3: she not write her music?
Speaker 2: No, Beyonce doesn't write anything.
Speaker 3: So she didn't write Lemonadeon, don't write nothing. She can't
Speaker 3: even read all. I love that girl.
Speaker 2: When the Beehive come for the unofficial expert, please leave
Speaker 2: me out of make sure you subscribe.
Speaker 5: And then I just want to say I've been very
Speaker 5: careful in what I've said so far.
Speaker 2: You have, I just want to say, has the Rehive
Speaker 2: so she's fine?
Speaker 5: If someone sent me a bunch of behives, I'd just
Speaker 5: be fabulous someone's paying attention to me at all.
Speaker 2: This is great.
Speaker 5: But all the be ives you want, I'll still still
Speaker 5: filter my photos and put them up.
Speaker 3: Do you know the only people do you think? Do
Speaker 3: you think I have grind her? What do you think
Speaker 3: I need Instagram for.
Speaker 2: The only people who came after me was Azalea Banks
Speaker 2: is Mermaid fans because what is that? I don't know,
Speaker 2: but they were. She and I were beefing and they
Speaker 2: were leaving.
Speaker 3: Eve and Azalea Banks were beefing.
Speaker 4: Yeah, because I said that she was she shouldn't be
Speaker 4: allowed to speak for herself because she's crazy.
Speaker 3: You don't know anything about her, So there you go.
Speaker 2: She's not even like stirring up drama. Nicey, what does
Speaker 2: she do? She she called me a house slave.
Speaker 3: Is she a comedian or a singer?
Speaker 4: She was a rapper? She calls you a house lave.
Speaker 4: And she was like, I'm free and I could talk
Speaker 4: about whatever I want to talk about. And I was like,
Speaker 4: she talks.
Speaker 1: About race a lot, but I feel like she doesn't
Speaker 1: some of the things she has valid points in and
Speaker 1: then the rest of it is just mass in all
Speaker 1: her craziness.
Speaker 2: She's nuts.
Speaker 4: Well, she just she likes to stir up controversy, like
Speaker 4: she was beefing with Rihanna. She was beefing with Zane
Speaker 4: from one direction she called she called them a sand
Speaker 4: niggas what she.
Speaker 2: Called sing.
Speaker 3: She was beefing with Russell Crow.
Speaker 1: Well, it's all the bleach that's going into her brain
Speaker 1: because she was bleaching her.
Speaker 3: I have to see a picture of this woman. No
Speaker 3: you don't. I can't believe I've never Okay, it's better that.
Speaker 2: Little girl from the Disney Channel who like roasted her.
Speaker 1: Remember she's like like child, she's like fourteen years old.
Speaker 1: She came to like rid with all the points.
Speaker 2: She had a bullet point PowerPoint presentation on Azilia Banks.
Speaker 3: It was beautiful as to watch. She was trash. The
Speaker 3: reads were awesome because it is I love that. Do
Speaker 3: you guys watch RuPauls Drag Race or anything or no
Speaker 3: we don't.
Speaker 2: I'll look at clips on YouTube or do you know?
Speaker 3: Have you been to drag shows?
Speaker 5: Have been to drag culture and so okay, yeah, we
Speaker 5: have to go to Money Exchange show in New York.
Speaker 5: Okay we'll take us yea yeah, yeah, Monday night's Barracuda
Speaker 5: and Wednesday at Therapy at eleven pm.
Speaker 3: We should all go.
Speaker 2: We performed at Therapy before.
Speaker 5: Yeah, miss Cracker sometimes you'd miss Cracker. Yeah, yeah, of
Speaker 5: course they do.
Speaker 4: Okay, I love cracker crackers, fabulous with them.
Speaker 5: Sorry on it's just like go with my group of
Speaker 5: gay friends where it's all reading Shane and I'm sitting
Speaker 5: here it's all reading Shane and I was like, you
Speaker 5: guys need to come to a drag show.
Speaker 2: I've seen you with your group group of gays. You
Speaker 2: have a good group of games.
Speaker 3: Oh my crew, I love them so much. Everyone's tall
Speaker 3: and like everyone's tall.
Speaker 5: And Patty, my friend Patty he is five four and
Speaker 5: has bright red hair and mustache and walks around Washington
Speaker 5: Heights in a fur coat. And Verry Joeyanne the scammer Hunt,
Speaker 5: and then there's Bob the drag queen. And Bob it
Speaker 5: was his birthday the other day and we went to
Speaker 5: like when it was his apartment and he was wearing
Speaker 5: he was walking around his name with a crown and
Speaker 5: like a cheetah print vests. And we went over to
Speaker 5: this one place and this woman's like, oh my god,
Speaker 5: I love your crown.
Speaker 3: He's like, oh, thank you so much.
Speaker 5: He's like, oh, I was gonna take it, and he goes,
Speaker 5: oh you want my crown? She goes yeah, it goes
Speaker 5: bitch I'm not giving it to.
Speaker 3: You and keeps walking like in Washington Heights. Yeah, it's great.
Speaker 5: I mean, I love my friends, my friend Alfredo, who's
Speaker 5: mean to everybody.
Speaker 2: My friend Alfredo's the tall, cute one.
Speaker 3: It's super hot and just mean and we love them.
Speaker 2: Do you think the crews are harder than ever?
Speaker 1: Like they the pack is stronger, Like I feel like
Speaker 1: the gays are coming together to trans everything is just
Speaker 1: people want to stick together now because there's Trump in office.
Speaker 4: Yeah, wow, Sutar beat political hot do that in there?
Speaker 2: You know you don't even vote.
Speaker 3: People don't need to know my business, Marie.
Speaker 5: I also think it's like, you know, you just get
Speaker 5: to a certain point where, like you meet people and
Speaker 5: you connect. It is harder to make friends when you
Speaker 5: get older, too, unless you're a comedy.
Speaker 3: That's a weird that's a weird world.
Speaker 2: I want to make friends when you're older.
Speaker 5: No, I don't even want to like try new foods.
Speaker 5: I don't want to do anything new. I'm like a
Speaker 5: bitter old queen and I'm like, everyone get away from me.
Speaker 5: And I listened to like the nineties and nineteen fifties
Speaker 5: opera But yeah, are we just all sort of connect
Speaker 5: and love each other and it's.
Speaker 4: You know, so, how important do you think entourage is
Speaker 4: for a diva?
Speaker 2: Because like Beyonce ain't got.
Speaker 1: No friends, right, Beyonce Angie her cousin, right, But she
Speaker 1: has Solange.
Speaker 5: My cousins are my best even hang out. No Solange,
Speaker 5: I don't even think has ever met Beyonce.
Speaker 4: Shit, she Beyonce has that light skin security guard that's
Speaker 4: in all the photos with her.
Speaker 3: Yeah, big one.
Speaker 2: And then like Rihanna has, Rihanna's got friends.
Speaker 5: Rihanna's seems like she's got friends, has a good time
Speaker 5: as in enjoying her fame. She seems like she She's like,
Speaker 5: you know what, my voice can sometimes sound like beef jerky,
Speaker 5: but I don't give a shit.
Speaker 3: I'm gonna dance, I'm gonna look great.
Speaker 1: I feel like Rihanna doesn't have anybody telling her no though.
Speaker 3: Ever.
Speaker 5: Yeah, but also Beyonce or Beyonce, Rihanna she's like, I
Speaker 5: don't know, she came out not so precious, so I
Speaker 5: think she's forgiven.
Speaker 3: All these things.
Speaker 5: Like Beyonce was like like pitch to us is like,
Speaker 5: so yeah, a precious, don't like it's like a you know,
Speaker 5: jewelry or something, so it's harder to maintain that.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Rihanna was like, I'm messing my titties out. Let's
Speaker 2: put on the thought, let's go to Barbados.
Speaker 3: Let's smoke.
Speaker 2: We would have brown dude in a chacua.
Speaker 5: From the beginning, it would if she would have a
Speaker 5: whole different career. But she came out as like you know,
Speaker 5: everyone was like, oh, Whitney, like a young innocent girl.
Speaker 5: And then she married Bobby Brown.
Speaker 2: No, but they said that she was. She was doing
Speaker 2: drugs before she even met She.
Speaker 5: Was, but not to the extent like Bobby pushed it.
Speaker 5: She was a lesbian. She also was oh yeah, yeah,
Speaker 5: did you see the interview with Sissy Houston without her
Speaker 5: and Robin with Whitney's friend Robin. They were her best
Speaker 5: friend who is a lesbian. They were rumored to be together.
Speaker 5: And then wasn't she there when she died?
Speaker 3: She was not there when she died.
Speaker 5: But she said, Sis Houston wrote a book and I
Speaker 5: wrote quotations. I have a friend who ghost wrote that book.
Speaker 5: But she you think sis Houston is sitting down at
Speaker 5: chapter one?
Speaker 3: I mean no.
Speaker 5: So Oprah went to go visit her in her apartment
Speaker 5: in New Jersey and they were talking and then she
Speaker 5: got to the topic of Robin and she said, in
Speaker 5: quotations of what Sissy wrote, she goes, whatever Robin's relationship
Speaker 5: was with Whitney, it was one that I didn't like.
Speaker 5: I didn't really like Robin blah blah blah. And then
Speaker 5: you know, I don't know if that relationship was anything
Speaker 5: more than friends, but I know I didn't like it.
Speaker 5: And then so Oprah goes, so do you think that
Speaker 5: they were together? And she goes, I don't know, and
Speaker 5: then she goes, would you have approved? And she goes no.
Speaker 5: And then Oprah was like shocked. Oberah goes, you wouldn't
Speaker 5: have approved, and she goes no. So it's body would
Speaker 5: have at that time in the nineteen eighties to have
Speaker 5: a Whitney fucking Houston be a lesbian way, No.
Speaker 2: And the she had like a big Christian following.
Speaker 3: No, she did. But isn't the mom like a pastor?
Speaker 5: Well she had, yeah, she she that woman should no
Speaker 5: longer be allowed to sing on television. But did you
Speaker 5: see her when she's sang back up for Retha Franklin
Speaker 5: on David Letterman, And.
Speaker 3: She was like rolling her eyes literally and Noriy Davis
Speaker 3: and I have talked about this for he was join.
Speaker 3: All the other women were like dancing and like Sissy's
Speaker 3: just standing there. I'm like, why did you even come?
Speaker 3: Why did you just wanted to be there? She went
Speaker 3: to make show.
Speaker 2: Face she had on that be on Arthur Blazer.
Speaker 5: Well, Ritha also was singing an Adele cover like this
Speaker 5: is just sitting there like just so pissed us is
Speaker 5: Sissy had some time on All PM. She wasn't really
Speaker 5: there for them.
Speaker 3: Sissy has some day. Will Lean is just a really
Speaker 3: grumpy woman.
Speaker 2: I mean she's old and black. Of course she's grumpy. Yeah,
Speaker 2: you're allowed to be grumpy.
Speaker 5: I'm not begrudging her for that, but I'm just saying,
Speaker 5: just girl, every time you're on TV, it's like, oh Cissy,
Speaker 5: Like no one's ever walked away from Mississy Houston in
Speaker 5: and you're like, what a pleasant woman?
Speaker 3: Wonder what do you expect? Yeah, we should put Whitney
Speaker 3: through a lot, that's for sure.
Speaker 4: What is something about Whitney's life that you feel like
Speaker 4: most people don't know but should know.
Speaker 5: This was probably a lesbian suffering or at least by
Speaker 5: or at least fluid or something.
Speaker 3: You know.
Speaker 5: I think she got a lot of backlash in the
Speaker 5: beginning from the black community because they thought that she
Speaker 5: was too white.
Speaker 2: Right.
Speaker 5: There was like videos of her at the those are
Speaker 5: the b et Wars in the eighties, and they were
Speaker 5: booing her when they played like her music and stuff.
Speaker 3: So she had a lot of identity. Well that's how
Speaker 3: we start. We boo you first to see if you
Speaker 3: could take it, and then we're like, okay.
Speaker 5: You got it, and there is it's similar to gays. Gays,
Speaker 5: we bring you in and then we just make fun
Speaker 5: of you, love you for the rest of your life.
Speaker 5: Like there was a drag show when Whitney died. Someone
Speaker 5: came out in a coffin and they played a Whitney
Speaker 5: Huston song and it was just like a finger and
Speaker 5: they had like bubble like drowning music and and that's
Speaker 5: like but that's like gays honoring her because like gays,
Speaker 5: you know, like if a straight person was like I
Speaker 5: hate Whitney, the same gays laughing and that would be.
Speaker 3: Like, oh damn you, she's our queen.
Speaker 5: So gays do we're very strange in a coffin, like
Speaker 5: was the draft. It was a coughin like rolled out
Speaker 5: stop it tae, yes.
Speaker 2: I hate gay people would have yes't say yes? Have
Speaker 2: you not?
Speaker 3: Is there any clips on there or YouTube? There was
Speaker 3: one drag queen who did like what was that song?
Speaker 5: Like taking a splash and then they would like play
Speaker 5: Whitney's music and then they would play like a toilet
Speaker 5: swirling and something.
Speaker 2: Oh wow, they're really elaborate with their shows, aren't you.
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, exact queen show. It's a real show. Yeah,
Speaker 3: I want to perform. You gotta step it up. I mean,
Speaker 3: you know, it's a lot better than Hamilton.
Speaker 5: It is, Honestly, I went so I went to go
Speaker 5: see my friend Monett's show, and then I went to
Speaker 5: go see a Broadway Show'd never seen a Broadway show.
Speaker 5: When I saw Cats, I got free tickets. Long story, okay,
Speaker 5: yeah I was. I was like, oh, I'd rather go
Speaker 5: back and watch the drag show like this.
Speaker 2: Cats wasn't good.
Speaker 5: Do you think Cats was good? As is embarrassing to
Speaker 5: say out loud. Do they have new costume? No, they
Speaker 5: look like they have height.
Speaker 2: They don't look those good Will costumes that they had
Speaker 2: twenty years ago. Cats the the animal version of Rent
Speaker 2: like all the.
Speaker 5: No, I would have preferred that someone I had feline
Speaker 5: ates and died. Nothing happened. Nothing happened in that show.
Speaker 5: It's just the cats going down like we're cats, We're cats.
Speaker 5: I'm like, I know, I bought the ticket. And then
Speaker 5: you know it's like they like keep talking about the
Speaker 5: other cats, like.
Speaker 3: I'm Gusti's the cat not the thief to the door.
Speaker 3: I'm like, is a dog gonna show up or something?
Speaker 3: And then Grizabella comes out and they don't like her,
Speaker 3: and then I think she got abducted by an alien.
Speaker 3: It was really a weird play. Nothing. How long was
Speaker 3: this dam play? Oh like two and a half hours,
Speaker 3: I mean too long, too long. I had to I
Speaker 3: was there for like a gay night or whatever, like
Speaker 3: it was like gay influencers. I was sitting and I
Speaker 3: also saw cats with my friends Alfredo and Milk Milk.
Speaker 3: I saw just that one time.
Speaker 2: You have a friend named Milk.
Speaker 3: I have a friend in Milk. I have a weird life,
Speaker 3: I think, Oh, yes, later, Sorry, do I sound a mess.
Speaker 2: It?
Speaker 3: I do not hurt your feelings?
Speaker 2: No, you know, sound like the past people that we've
Speaker 2: had real mess really.
Speaker 3: Yes, Okay, yeah, my life is I have I'm pretty together.
Speaker 2: Yeah, how's your life?
Speaker 3: Fine? I am alone.
Speaker 5: I've been single for seven years. I'm trying to trap
Speaker 5: this Dominican. It's never gonna happen when you.
Speaker 3: Say alone, are you not having sex or like what?
Speaker 3: I don't have a lot of sex.
Speaker 5: I have a guy who comes over who's like Mary,
Speaker 5: and he and I just every once in a while,
Speaker 5: I have a fuck and then he leaves.
Speaker 2: He's he's married to a man or a woman to
Speaker 2: a man.
Speaker 3: Oh ye yeah yeah, yeah, yeah yeah, keep.
Speaker 2: It in the family.
Speaker 3: It's fine. Yeah, so wow, that's pretty much. I'm very like.
Speaker 5: It's so funny because I the my last relationship I
Speaker 5: had was seven years ago, was for two years. It
Speaker 5: wasn't a great one, and after that I just sort
Speaker 5: of dove into like, yeah, I was dorinking.
Speaker 3: I was well.
Speaker 5: First I wanted to perform, because I've been doing comedy
Speaker 5: five years now, so before then I wanted to perform,
Speaker 5: and when I was dating him, I never got a
Speaker 5: chance to. So I joined this cabaret group in Chicago.
Speaker 5: And the reason I did it is because I said
Speaker 5: I could pick my own music. So like, oh, you
Speaker 5: don't even know that half of it. We performed at
Speaker 5: only gay strip clubs in Chicago every week, and then
Speaker 5: we had really shitty burlesque dancers and really bad drag queens.
Speaker 3: So I was in the minister club in a strip club.
Speaker 5: So I would perform while the strip we were in
Speaker 5: a basement that Anne Frank wouldn't hide in, and there's
Speaker 5: like a stripper in a corner trying to get hard
Speaker 5: while drag queen is powdering her nose for the eighth time.
Speaker 3: And then like the cabaret dancer was like one two
Speaker 3: step one, do you want too? No? I said what
Speaker 3: I mean, everyone's drinking. We got smashed. And then I
Speaker 3: would go on stage.
Speaker 2: And be like mam means all alone, and.
Speaker 5: They would just be like throwing peanuts at me. But
Speaker 5: I like peanuts or peanut peanuts, peanuts. No, I wasn't stripping,
Speaker 5: but I so there was no sh the strippers stripped.
Speaker 5: I came out to sing serious music and they hated it.
Speaker 2: Well, what were you wearing while you were singing?
Speaker 3: Like literally what I'm wearing right now?
Speaker 2: Was it a strip club talent show?
Speaker 3: Like this just was a strip club bird.
Speaker 5: Then we would have our burlesque shows, so they would say,
Speaker 5: like the burlesque group I won't want to say the
Speaker 5: name of the group is coming to perform, and also
Speaker 5: entertainment from you know whatever, Jose And it was just
Speaker 5: a big mess, but I loved it. I did that
Speaker 5: for two years and then I got into comedy and
Speaker 5: I was like, okay, and that's why I MIC's. I
Speaker 5: was like, oh, these are very that's quite glamorous, cause
Speaker 5: I was used.
Speaker 2: To a very different side of performance, said that open
Speaker 2: mics are glamorous. What have you been through, sir?
Speaker 3: When you're performing for strippers and old people and drunks
Speaker 3: and gays, and all of a sudden, it's just a
Speaker 3: roomful of like nerdy white dudes. I'm like, this is
Speaker 3: wildly different.
Speaker 2: Four weird white men listening, yeah, looking.
Speaker 3: And just barely listening. But yeah, so I don't know.
Speaker 5: But you don't even You just need bodies in the
Speaker 5: in the I just see bodies. I don't care who's
Speaker 5: in those seats. I don't give a ship. I don't
Speaker 5: want to talk to you used to do.
Speaker 2: Some really terrible shows, and then it was appreciative if
Speaker 2: you saw cats and hated it. What's the worst show
Speaker 2: you've ever been.
Speaker 3: I got booed by two hundred gay men in Chicago
Speaker 3: at an AIDS event. Why because oh, well, did you
Speaker 3: make an AID joke? No? No, no, but not looking back,
Speaker 3: I should have. But I.
Speaker 5: They opened the show by having First of all, it's
Speaker 5: a place that used to be called manhole, and they
Speaker 5: have a sign in the bathroom says no crystal math.
Speaker 5: So this is already red flag for me. They called
Speaker 5: it crystal math, and not like they said no use
Speaker 5: of meth. They were flagging a patchure of it and everything,
Speaker 5: and so I was like, all right, And so what
Speaker 5: they did the show, The dragcreen host sing was really great,
Speaker 5: Dixie Krt right, I think it is her name.
Speaker 3: She was really funny.
Speaker 5: But this is in Chicago, and they flew me out
Speaker 5: there to do this, and they had porn stars wearing
Speaker 5: crocheted jox traps, which I have no clue if that
Speaker 5: had anything to do the HIV affiliated but they just
Speaker 5: had women sewing these jockstraps. And then the men came
Speaker 5: out did all this dance and then like immediately brought
Speaker 5: me out, which like, you can't have sex first and
Speaker 5: then comedy. You gotta have comedy first and then sex.
Speaker 5: So they brought me out and there's two hundred gay men.
Speaker 5: They're drunk talking. No one's listening to me. I literally
Speaker 5: was on stage for about a minute and a half,
Speaker 5: and in comedy that is a long time where everyone
Speaker 5: was talking and and like at the level I'm talking
Speaker 5: right now, obnoxious fag level, and I'm just.
Speaker 3: Like, I'm like, hello, hi, is anybody? No, anybody? And
Speaker 3: no one listened, and I saw I go, is anybody
Speaker 3: gonna listen? And one guy turns around, thinking he's funny
Speaker 3: and goes, yeah, well listen if you put on a
Speaker 3: jock strap. So I lost it. I was like, oh,
Speaker 3: I get it. You people, which is never good to
Speaker 3: call my own people. You people. I was like, you
Speaker 3: people won't support your own performers, but you will support
Speaker 3: that weekend at Bernie Is called Britney Spears in Vegas.
Speaker 3: And they.
Speaker 5: Turned so quickly, and then someone was like they started booming.
Speaker 5: I was like, oh, yeah, you're booing. Sorry, I'm not
Speaker 5: Kathy Griffin of the Ghost of Drone Rivers. You're all
Speaker 5: pieces of shit and Christina Aguilera is a cun And
Speaker 5: then literally one guy was like trying to rush the stage.
Speaker 3: And then coming yeah, queen. He set him off, and
Speaker 3: then I said this is how I left.
Speaker 5: It was six minutes, and I go, I'm sure you're
Speaker 5: all mask tops, but I've been watching you mince and
Speaker 5: prance for the past fifteen minutes. Everyone hears a piece
Speaker 5: of shit, and I left two booze and then I
Speaker 5: went to the back room, where seven porn stars looked
Speaker 5: at me like, I made the wrong choice in life,
Speaker 5: But did.
Speaker 3: You get paid? Though?
Speaker 5: Yes, it's a win, Yeah, it's a win, but I
Speaker 5: mean it's a it's a strange sound to hear, babe,
Speaker 5: But I've told that story since the gay shows and
Speaker 5: they laughed.
Speaker 3: So it works.
Speaker 2: You got a story out of it, that's what matter.
Speaker 2: I did a charity show for like kids that don't
Speaker 2: have money for vaccines or something, and they showed this
Speaker 2: super sad video of Julia Roberts in.
Speaker 3: Like her for Mother's Day.
Speaker 4: In like the congo or something where like watching a
Speaker 4: baby die. Because he didn't get.
Speaker 3: Like, Jue Roberts, why are you in the congo? Right?
Speaker 2: And then it was like and you know, she's like,
Speaker 2: this is so sad. And then they were like and
Speaker 2: now comedy I know.
Speaker 5: And I was like, every time you do an event
Speaker 5: that's not a comedy club, they don't know how to
Speaker 5: do comedy.
Speaker 3: Show, how to do it.
Speaker 5: You never get a proper host, no, and they never
Speaker 5: get a proper stage or people don't know what they're
Speaker 5: there for.
Speaker 1: We don't fucking light I'm like, first of all, I'm black,
Speaker 1: they won't see me, so I'm just talking and teeth floating,
Speaker 1: like come on.
Speaker 3: They had together forming on like a trampoline and you're like,
Speaker 3: I do.
Speaker 4: Not even that.
Speaker 5: They're like, well, there's a utility closet over there if
Speaker 5: you want to. That's kind of a stage.
Speaker 2: And then they'll have people service dogs walking around.
Speaker 3: It's like what the fuck.
Speaker 4: And then you're like, you're gonna light me at some
Speaker 4: point and they're like, just do this much time. It's
Speaker 4: like I'm just gonna do what I feel comfortable to.
Speaker 5: I will say to them, I said, that's great, you
Speaker 5: should light me at ten minutes, and they'd be like,
Speaker 5: I'm kind of mean at those events. I've actually walked
Speaker 5: into event once and said this isn't I'm I'm gonna go.
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, oh yeah. Because they it was like this
Speaker 3: woman was like begging me through Twitter and Instagram to
Speaker 3: do this show is in Brooklyn, blah blah blah, gay show,
Speaker 3: this and that. I was like, all right, I'll go,
Speaker 3: I'll show up. And then I show up and it's
Speaker 3: like her and two musicians and an empty, empty bar.
Speaker 3: And I was like, when is the show going to start?
Speaker 5: She goes, well, the way we'll do it is like
Speaker 5: you just get on the microphone and start talking and
Speaker 5: hopefully people will like show up.
Speaker 3: Oh yeah yeah.
Speaker 5: And I said okay, I said that's not what I do.
Speaker 5: I said, so have an I stay and I literally
Speaker 5: walked out. It was fine, I'm where she understands.
Speaker 3: I don't know if she did. She seemed a little spectrum.
Speaker 3: How deep in Brooklyn was the show? It was long
Speaker 3: island no no, no, no, no, no no no.
Speaker 1: I was like, you might as well just stay. Your
Speaker 1: train is another hour, so you might as well do
Speaker 1: some time.
Speaker 5: Well, there was there was a show I did two
Speaker 5: days ago that was like a gay show. And I
Speaker 5: walked in and there was one person in the audience
Speaker 5: and she said, you know, you can do time if
Speaker 5: you want to, And I said, actually no, I said,
Speaker 5: there's just one you know, but Taylor just saying nah,
Speaker 5: because I was like, I was like I was, She's
Speaker 5: like I'm so, I'm like, that's okay. She she really
Speaker 5: apologized and she wanted to pay me. I was like,
Speaker 5: you're not paying me. I was like, this totally happens.
Speaker 5: She was new in comedy. I was like, this totally happens.
Speaker 5: Don't worry about it.
Speaker 3: I'm like to know that money. But like, okay, taking
Speaker 3: that money.
Speaker 5: I know.
Speaker 3: That's what Bob says. He's like, white people have a
Speaker 3: really difficult time with money.
Speaker 5: It's like anytime of like if a white person is
Speaker 5: like I will pay other white people like throw their
Speaker 5: credit cards down, every black person will just sit there
Speaker 5: and smile and saying, Okay, you got it.
Speaker 2: Bob needs to be the money expert. The next time
Speaker 2: he's Bob is.
Speaker 3: I love Bob. We'll be in a cab and I'll
Speaker 3: say sorry something. Bob was like, you're not why are
Speaker 3: you saying sorry? Wow?
Speaker 5: And the cab driver can hear us, and I'm like like,
Speaker 5: you're right, You're right, I'm not sorry. It's like you
Speaker 5: say excuse me, so but yeah, but yeah, I told
Speaker 5: that girl. I was like, yeah, I was like, sorry,
Speaker 5: this is just not enough people, and that's can you
Speaker 5: keep your money?
Speaker 2: How many people do you need for it?
Speaker 5: At least five? I mean, what are we talking about here?
Speaker 5: Do you think I'm gonna stand there for one person?
Speaker 5: That's the most embarrassing thing ever.
Speaker 3: And I was like fine. I didn't come across as
Speaker 3: a bitch or anything. I was.
Speaker 5: I was like, keep your money, and I was like,
Speaker 5: this happens and blah blah blah. But how much are
Speaker 5: you going to pay you forty? I was like, but
Speaker 5: I said, is this coming out? Is this coming out
Speaker 5: of your own pocket? Or you getting refunded? And she goes,
Speaker 5: it's coming out. I'll take the hit and I said no.
Speaker 5: I was like, how about you keep it?
Speaker 3: And I go, you know this was a hit for
Speaker 3: me definitely. I know, bitch.
Speaker 5: I had to come out to the Decalp stop and Bushwick.
Speaker 5: I'm coming from the Upper east Side.
Speaker 3: Can you uber helicopter me back home instead?
Speaker 1: I mean I was faking exactly. I'm like, Yo, you
Speaker 1: could just give me a car, don't carmel it, just
Speaker 1: give me like a real.
Speaker 3: Car, like Matteo.
Speaker 2: I feel like you give good show and you like
Speaker 2: there are people who are really bad performers, and people
Speaker 2: will come out to see them in droves, right, Like
Speaker 2: people will come out in waves to see somebody like Mariah,
Speaker 2: like Mariah or Britney Spears in Vegas or you know,
Speaker 2: just a lot of these women and Rihanna people. Rihanna
Speaker 2: is not somebody who can sing live.
Speaker 3: She is fine.
Speaker 2: She's fine.
Speaker 3: She's and I say fine with like real hesitance. Tickets
Speaker 3: are two.
Speaker 2: Hundred and fifty dollars. I don't want a fine.
Speaker 3: Well, that's why I feel. That's what I say.
Speaker 2: The date it is hell when she's performed.
Speaker 5: And I also say, though, that's why I get so
Speaker 5: mad at maybe you guys will back me up. I
Speaker 5: hate like when I say, like, oh yeah, I'm Miley
Speaker 5: Cyrus does nothing for me and like neither just like
Speaker 5: you know, like the standard at one point was was
Speaker 5: like such good singing and now everyone just sounds.
Speaker 2: What about Lady Gaga?
Speaker 3: Oh I love her, Okay, oh I love her. She
Speaker 3: can really sing, No, she can really sing.
Speaker 5: I do appreciate her too, because she reminds me very
Speaker 5: much of my Italian grandma, where it's like just too
Speaker 5: much all the time, Like she's my grandmother's living room.
Speaker 3: It's the most she'll wear a couch on her shoulders
Speaker 3: and she literally when she came with the meat, I
Speaker 3: was like, girl, she's next to Sharon Shares like, I
Speaker 3: don't know who this meat locker is next to me?
Speaker 3: My daughter's a man. That's what Share sounds like she does,
Speaker 3: doesn't she? I don't know? You tell me I really
Speaker 3: know who this woman is.
Speaker 5: That's a really good Share make her sound like a
Speaker 5: nerdy Jewish dude.
Speaker 3: I don't know who this is. Well, when I met
Speaker 3: Lady Gaga had strength zazz and also getz twice like
Speaker 3: actually fun.
Speaker 2: Lies. Wait, I have a question.
Speaker 1: So in terms of divas and like the drinking and drugs,
Speaker 1: do you think it goes hand in hand? There's not
Speaker 1: many divas that don't be getting fucked up because I.
Speaker 5: Think it's hard. We put a lot of like gay
Speaker 5: men are just enabling these women to mental disorders. But
Speaker 5: I think that's it's really hard to maintain. But the
Speaker 5: thing is is when you see someone who here, it
Speaker 5: goes both ways, all right. So there's too much pressure
Speaker 5: on the audiences side to expect Mariah to be dream
Speaker 5: lover days.
Speaker 3: It's never gonna happen.
Speaker 5: But at the same time, Mariah, stop also trying to
Speaker 5: pretend you're that. Stop lip syncing, stop dressing that way.
Speaker 3: You have to evolve.
Speaker 5: Like, if you're not evolving artistically as an artist and
Speaker 5: as a singer, your audience is gonna grow frustrating you. Because, bitch,
Speaker 5: I'm gonna pay two hundred dollars to can watch you
Speaker 5: lip sync.
Speaker 3: I will go watch a drag queen to the same.
Speaker 3: But that's what they want from Britney Spears. Britney Spears
Speaker 3: is a whole other topic.
Speaker 2: They want her to think, but they don't even want
Speaker 2: her to be there. They're like, can you just bring
Speaker 2: your voice and don't come.
Speaker 3: Yeah, well, Christina Aguilera is insufferable, but yeah, she's the
Speaker 3: other one. She's the worst. She's yes, yet of course not.
Speaker 3: She was gonna say I made an entire career out
Speaker 3: of judging things I know nothing about. I thought.
Speaker 2: I was like, well, what happened. She's definitely a foot excuse.
Speaker 3: Me, no, she she's there's yeah, she's not.
Speaker 2: Sorry.
Speaker 3: When her Christmas album is offensive, I don't even.
Speaker 2: Know what song it is.
Speaker 3: Merry Christmas, Josh, oh, that's it.
Speaker 5: She's adding words into words. She was singing, have yourself
Speaker 5: my little Christmas and I hang a shining star up
Speaker 5: on the highest bar, and right is the word. She goes,
Speaker 5: hang a shining star shot upon that.
Speaker 1: Listeners, that's not there, she said, listeners, have you still
Speaker 1: have ears after this?
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's embarrassing. It's embarrassing.
Speaker 2: Who's your favorite person to watch that's like.
Speaker 3: A train wreck Lindsay Lohan?
Speaker 2: No, I mean perform like perform, Yeah, I mean Lindsay
Speaker 2: is a train rag. She's not fun to watch, though
Speaker 2: I've served her many times.
Speaker 3: And I was like, girl, you smell like an you
Speaker 3: thought it was Susan Boyle in a red wig.
Speaker 1: She smelled like an ass tray in an old school
Speaker 1: New York taxi.
Speaker 2: Yeah, She's like she was like Taxi Cab Confessions.
Speaker 3: She was that show.
Speaker 2: And she was mad that she was like the bartender
Speaker 2: as like he doesn't.
Speaker 3: Imagine she has Rachel Ray boys like.
Speaker 2: The tosk, like he doesn't know me, he should respect.
Speaker 3: And I was like, she said that to you, like,
Speaker 3: have you seen your career in the past ten years?
Speaker 2: I was like, you don't even look like you used
Speaker 2: to look. Has she done anything after mean Girls?
Speaker 3: Or was that was her a lot of.
Speaker 2: She was a lesbian for a couple couple of years.
Speaker 3: Oh that was the best.
Speaker 5: She was interviewed on Alan Carr Show in Britain. He
Speaker 5: was like, so, oh, your author a Matha and she's like,
Speaker 5: that's rude. And he's like, I don't know all you
Speaker 5: back in the cock? Are you back into cock? Nobody
Speaker 5: has asked me that before.
Speaker 2: Wasn't she a Muslim woman?
Speaker 3: For a minute?
Speaker 5: Two guys, All right, I'll fill you in, all right.
Speaker 5: Her Instagram this is my bed. Her Instagram is better
Speaker 5: the Game of Thrones. She lost a finger and a
Speaker 5: boating accident in Grease and then had it sewn back on.
Speaker 3: Literally was like I found it.
Speaker 5: And then she erased all her Instagram after she wrote
Speaker 5: a poem to Isis and then resurfaced in a surfing
Speaker 5: wetsuit with a hijab and is now campaigning herself to
Speaker 5: be the Little Mermaid for Disney's live version of Little Mermaid,
Speaker 5: which by the time she gets to Ursula Artha is
Speaker 5: gonna be like, you know what, you keep the voice.
Speaker 5: But because she lost that finger, she has her own
Speaker 5: dingle hopper.
Speaker 3: Now stop it why doesn't Why don't they just get
Speaker 3: these people their help, the help they need. They need
Speaker 3: to be in like those who are surrounded by a
Speaker 3: lot of yes people. And that's why you have to
Speaker 3: be careful.
Speaker 5: Like the more we do this, if we become famous
Speaker 5: or bigger, you have to watch who's surrounding so because
Speaker 5: people will just agree with you because they want to
Speaker 5: live off you.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but my mother would never just say yes to me.
Speaker 3: Oh, neither would my mom or my aunt Cindy, or
Speaker 3: my cousins.
Speaker 2: My mother would shut me down every day.
Speaker 4: And you you know, my mom will call me every
Speaker 4: day and be like, I don't smoking you in three days,
Speaker 4: And I'm like, my mom does that too.
Speaker 3: Today.
Speaker 1: Me and Marie keep each other humble, Like as soon
Speaker 1: as I think I'm killing it, she's like, girl, your
Speaker 1: ankles are ashy.
Speaker 3: But yeah, but your legs are dry. We keep each
Speaker 3: other grounded. My friend leaves a trigger, keeps me roll grounded.
Speaker 2: She's outstanding how she's.
Speaker 5: A Russian refugee, Jewish crazy kunt I love her so much.
Speaker 2: She always looks like she doesn't like you, but I
Speaker 2: feel like, you know, the thing I love.
Speaker 5: About Lisa is that she's so brutal. She can be
Speaker 5: nothing but honest, and she craves authenticity. And so when
Speaker 5: you're with her, you find yourself like working on your
Speaker 5: own character in person because you want to make sure
Speaker 5: you're being as authentic as you can for her.
Speaker 4: Okay, So going through the list of the devas, then
Speaker 4: right the top divas, who needs and we can even
Speaker 4: throw Little Kim in there because she needs one to No,
Speaker 4: Little Kim needs somebody to hit him with the naw
Speaker 4: Mariah yes?
Speaker 3: And then who else Mariah?
Speaker 5: And then I would probably say, oh, you know, Christina,
Speaker 5: actually she really needs someone to be like, you're unlikable
Speaker 5: and someone else has to write your music because you
Speaker 5: have You're a classic, you have, you have a great voice,
Speaker 5: You're very beautiful.
Speaker 3: You have terrible music and a terrible attitude. People don't
Speaker 3: like you.
Speaker 2: Okay, so what about Jennifer Lopez.
Speaker 3: Trema Lopez is just fine waiting for tonight.
Speaker 2: Jennifer Love and her thin ass voice. She got a rod,
Speaker 2: She do fine and she crushes it in Vegas.
Speaker 5: Yeah, she's she listens, she knows she's not a singer,
Speaker 5: she knows she's a dancer. She knows she looks good.
Speaker 5: She knows she's lucky as fuck. Like, I'm fine with
Speaker 5: Jennifer Lopez.
Speaker 2: Jennifer Lopez voices thinner than Jenet Jackson.
Speaker 3: Jennifer Lopez's voice is thinner than the tallest mountain, and.
Speaker 2: Jennifer Lopez voices thinner than my edges.
Speaker 3: Y'all, So Jennifer Lopez is not thinner than me.
Speaker 1: Oh, I have one more question. That was like pretending
Speaker 1: to Jessica Simpson. Did you see her on Ellen?
Speaker 3: Oh? Yeah, I saw lesbian question.
Speaker 1: No, no, no, not only just the lesbian question. She
Speaker 1: seemed percocet out her mind.
Speaker 5: She did a truck commercial or a car insurance commercial.
Speaker 5: I was like, girl, you are a billionaire. Why are
Speaker 5: you doing?
Speaker 1: That's what Ellen asked. She's like, Ellen was basically, you're
Speaker 1: so dumb. How are you a billionaire? She's like, I know,
Speaker 1: I mean literally can happen to anybody in here.
Speaker 4: It's closed everybody, like everybody's wearing those Jessica Simpsons do
Speaker 4: good shoes.
Speaker 2: She got a good shoe.
Speaker 1: But Jessica Simpson actually her reality show with Nick is
Speaker 1: kind of like the sex take to Kim Kay.
Speaker 3: Because well it's different though she did pop off.
Speaker 1: At because of that show MTV was making mad but
Speaker 1: when their marriage ended because of that show, because it
Speaker 1: was fine and her career, her career career as a singer.
Speaker 3: She like watches a game man design shoes and she's
Speaker 3: like love she love it.
Speaker 2: She got shoes, she got an active wear line. Now
Speaker 2: she got an athleisure wing. It's called the warm Up.
Speaker 2: It's our comedy. Is it really called the warm Up?
Speaker 2: It's called I'm not joking.
Speaker 3: It's in Macy's.
Speaker 2: Is it called ivy across.
Speaker 3: The street from It makes me like, I guess she's
Speaker 3: doing it right though you know if you know you're
Speaker 3: not that talented because you were seeing her sing, it's
Speaker 3: embarrassing for everyone. Is this no she sings?
Speaker 5: Yeah, like that's where she she thinks she's like this
Speaker 5: belt like Mariah, but she really it just sounds like
Speaker 5: a wet seal.
Speaker 3: She sounds like what seal. That's when they set her
Speaker 3: close to baby.
Speaker 2: Is it baby or biby?
Speaker 3: I always thought it was baby, but I read things
Speaker 3: like an Italian, so well we say it would be
Speaker 3: baby and French too, madrig well because.
Speaker 2: No, no, yeah, yeah, well are you talking about my Vagina.
Speaker 3: Well just a little, but I I do. Do you
Speaker 3: really speak French? Yeah?
Speaker 2: My mom and dad are from Hate.
Speaker 3: Oh that's so cool.
Speaker 5: You know, the most handsome aount the face of the planet.
Speaker 5: Look clerk, uh like so hot, but he knows uh
Speaker 5: he he speaks friends right there, just well that's wet.
Speaker 3: I met his mom the other day. We were just
Speaker 3: like walking on the street and I bumped into him
Speaker 3: and he was with his mom.
Speaker 5: So I immediately turned to her and started speaking French,
Speaker 5: and she was so sweet and nice. Yeah, they were great,
Speaker 5: my friend again and with the mother, You're like French,
Speaker 5: it's a lot of work. I mean, oh, thank you,
Speaker 5: But I yes, fluent Italian and I speak Spanish. But
Speaker 5: then my French is like it's like your fourth favorite.
Speaker 5: Well it just like comes in some It's just like
Speaker 5: I'm literally using Italian.
Speaker 3: But you are a powerhouse.
Speaker 2: You know, they're right like you you got it together,
Speaker 2: you got.
Speaker 3: The lat Today I look exhausted and feel exhausted. City
Speaker 3: might have a face mask in her purse for you.
Speaker 3: She just did a mask is going to make my
Speaker 3: face not puffy. I need sleep, I need I was.
Speaker 5: Like I got about two hours sleep I was like,
Speaker 5: I need because I got home around like two, and
Speaker 5: then my friend Patty, who came from Fire Island was
Speaker 5: staying with me, and so he him and I probably
Speaker 5: got to sleep around like two thirty, and then I
Speaker 5: woke up at like I couldn't sleep because I'm not
Speaker 5: used to someone else in my bed, so I was
Speaker 5: like kind of tossing. He woke up screaming in a fight.
Speaker 5: He goes and that's another and then he like stopped
Speaker 5: and I was like, oh my god, Pati you Okay's
Speaker 5: like sorry, it's like get into a fight, and then
Speaker 5: fell back to sleep.
Speaker 1: Matello, I feel like you are. I feel like we
Speaker 1: need another episode, which you would something.
Speaker 2: Completely different too. I do also feel like that before
Speaker 2: we go, we.
Speaker 3: Have like a little quiz right, No, I felt we've
Speaker 3: been quizzing him. I want to know how you feel
Speaker 3: about to do okay. So I saw Adele twice.
Speaker 5: I saw SNL and I was like twenty feet away
Speaker 5: from her and it was beautiful. And then I saw
Speaker 5: her concert with Liza and we cried the whole time.
Speaker 5: I like Adele because I think she's she sticks to
Speaker 5: her brand. She's like I'm gonna sing and I'm going
Speaker 5: to release music and that's it. And I was right here,
Speaker 5: I'm not going to fucking sell out a perfume to
Speaker 5: commercials or clothing. She's like, I'm going to sing and
Speaker 5: that's it. And I feel like people were really connected
Speaker 5: to her. One thing about the concert, God, she wouldn't
Speaker 5: shut up. I mean it was just like I swear
Speaker 5: she sang two songs and everything was like Sevendy Vines.
Speaker 2: I'm like, I got my loll they have a stomach.
Speaker 5: But like, why don't you sound like mister Bean because
Speaker 5: Bean doesn't even talk.
Speaker 3: No, mister Bean doesn't even talk.
Speaker 2: But that's how mister Bean would talk if he spoke.
Speaker 3: But she's a great singer, and I I love that.
Speaker 5: I love people who are like, you know what, I'm
Speaker 5: just gonna sing because then I don't feel like I'm
Speaker 5: being lied to, you know what I mean. It's like
Speaker 5: Mariah and Selene and uh, you know Beyonce, Like.
Speaker 3: Really you need a perfume? You don't like how s
Speaker 3: the dairy all wrong? That's a dairy wrong? Do it
Speaker 3: all wrong?
Speaker 2: Tina Knowles originals.
Speaker 5: You do not hear tins stealing like drag queens like
Speaker 5: gang houses from the eighties.
Speaker 3: Okay, girl Tina knows she'd be trying like a witch.
Speaker 3: The house is like a mean witch.
Speaker 2: How yo, when the Hive come after you, my man, yo.
Speaker 3: I'm out. I'm out for the record. Everybody in the
Speaker 3: room to nodded. Yo.
Speaker 2: The Hive is going to come strong on neute. Okay,
Speaker 2: I have no ones who do this podcast. I hope
Speaker 2: that Janet Jackson will lose the weight in time for
Speaker 2: this concert in September.
Speaker 5: Of course she will, but I'm so mad at her
Speaker 5: right now because I bought checkets to go see her
Speaker 5: last concert and then she Oopsy got pregnant.
Speaker 3: I was like, bitch, you're like in your early hundreds.
Speaker 5: There's no Oopsy that has a one hundred thousand dollars
Speaker 5: for her No, because why would you do like, why
Speaker 5: would you just say you don't want to do the concert?
Speaker 5: Janet Jackson went in doubt will cancel a show. So
Speaker 5: I was like, I don't want to go back to
Speaker 5: see her lips in her ass off this time. I'm
Speaker 5: mad her because I love her so much. I love
Speaker 5: that song again, I love Runaway, I love Escapade, I
Speaker 5: love Together, I love I am such a big thing.
Speaker 2: What about her new music? She had like this song
Speaker 2: called like if.
Speaker 5: I could just throw myself out that window right now,
Speaker 5: I would new music, new music.
Speaker 3: I know she did and like it.
Speaker 5: No, what didn't like I'm with Wendy on this one,
Speaker 5: Like you know, Jenna, I don't.
Speaker 3: I don't want to watch you do new music. I
Speaker 3: don't want to hear it. Just go do the old hits.
Speaker 2: But she just said an artist got to evolve.
Speaker 3: Yeah, but she is well.
Speaker 5: She also stopped lip syncing because I watched her at
Speaker 5: that on YouTube at that last concert singing again, it
Speaker 5: was like a bad drag queen and it's like, oh,
Speaker 5: that's nothing.
Speaker 3: She's so wispy. Also, she laughs in all of her songs.
Speaker 3: Are you talking to?
Speaker 5: She's always gonna Tremaine Dupree and also may I say,
Speaker 5: jan Jackson hasn't said a funny thing in her life.
Speaker 3: She has never laughed ever. She has zero except a humor.
Speaker 3: Ha ha.
Speaker 2: I thought she was laughing. I thought she was laughing
Speaker 2: because Jermaine Dupris was in her mooning her, like tickling
Speaker 2: her clip her.
Speaker 3: She was like, you're always doing that, always doing that.
Speaker 4: Germaine is also the person who was making bomb ass music,
Speaker 4: Mariah Carrey.
Speaker 3: We below job up. Yeah, I know, always been my baby.
Speaker 3: We belong together. They had some great music together. And
Speaker 3: then Mariah's like.
Speaker 2: And he's like, I'm just.
Speaker 3: Gonna go do welcome to it. N It's like, shut up, Jamaine,
Speaker 3: you short. Jermaine is kind of embarrassing where he gets.
Speaker 3: He was like, ha, you know what is it? Shut
Speaker 3: up Jamaine?
Speaker 4: But is there anything that you want to leave the
Speaker 4: listeners with about divas or how to be a better diva?
Speaker 3: Just tell someone to date me? Okay, what are you
Speaker 3: looking for?
Speaker 2: Tell us right now?
Speaker 3: Well, right now, I'm.
Speaker 5: Obsessed with this beautiful Dominican man who just really doesn't
Speaker 5: give a shit.
Speaker 2: But you've been talking about him for months now.
Speaker 3: I feel you need to let that comes in.
Speaker 5: It comes out, comes in and comes out. I mean,
Speaker 5: he's not interested in you, Like, he's like not obviously
Speaker 5: that I'm looking for a handsome man that hates me.
Speaker 2: Why do people do that?
Speaker 3: The listening to the podcast is like, well, I like, MITTEO,
Speaker 3: what what's your ideal? Man?
Speaker 2: Just describe this person to us.
Speaker 3: I'm trying to think of what you want? Money Brown?
Speaker 2: Yeah, of course, okay, brown, we got we got brown listeners.
Speaker 3: We have definitely had Brown listeners. What else? Someone nice?
Speaker 3: You money?
Speaker 2: He needs money. You gotta have money. Nice means money and.
Speaker 3: Worry about money because you got your own. Nor listen
Speaker 3: for one person I'm gonna do my Lindsay Lohan Joe
Speaker 3: how embarrassing. I don't know.
Speaker 5: I guess I really don't know someone who is self,
Speaker 5: who's confident in themselves, who works out, not like crazy
Speaker 5: muscle buff or whatever, but not like a pig, you.
Speaker 1: Know, but tell you you need somebody who wants confidence
Speaker 1: and that doesn't work. You don't need somebody with you
Speaker 1: need somebody who to bow down and just like love
Speaker 1: you and be upset.
Speaker 3: No, I would hate that. Yeah, I didn't like that.
Speaker 3: I would hate either when I had that.
Speaker 1: YO, when you when you turn up missing, I'd be like,
Speaker 1: I know why, I don't think he listened to this
Speaker 1: podcast he hates me. Well, well, look, we'll we'll look
Speaker 1: for this guy for you. If I see one, I'll
Speaker 1: let you know. All right, material, where can people listening
Speaker 1: catch you?
Speaker 3: Yes?
Speaker 5: Uh, I'm probably at Starbucks begging for adult pio that's
Speaker 5: not burned.
Speaker 2: Mateo, your Instagram or Twitter thinks.
Speaker 5: Instagram and Twitter it's all the same handle. And then
Speaker 5: Matteo Lane m A T t e O l A
Speaker 5: any my Instagram AM just completely naked.
Speaker 2: Oh it's so fucking good out always. Oh you have
Speaker 2: a nice crack.
Speaker 3: I thank you. You must have suitors that yeah, must
Speaker 3: have like a doyen I have, like you know, people
Speaker 3: are like a butler. I feel like a matre d.
Speaker 2: You definitely got like gnomes that's ready to get up
Speaker 2: in it.
Speaker 5: Oh, there's a few guys I'm sexting, but one lives
Speaker 5: in like New Orleans. That's the problem with Instagram is
Speaker 5: you get guys who don't live here, like one in
Speaker 5: Brazil and one traveling.
Speaker 3: I don't like Minneapolis.
Speaker 2: Yay, you're not going there, but like there could be
Speaker 2: this nice There could be like a little Dominican Minneapolis.
Speaker 3: Dude, you and I both know that's not true. They don't.
Speaker 2: They don't do that.
Speaker 5: I was the most ethnic person in Minneapolis, and that's
Speaker 5: a problem. Yeah, but like you're a quarter Mexican. All right,
Speaker 5: someone get call Ice?
Speaker 2: All right, Sydney, where can people listening find you? You
Speaker 2: can find me on Instagram.
Speaker 1: Adjued BW and then you can catch me on Twitter
Speaker 1: just sid in ycuh and I am freezy r e
Speaker 1: e e z y unless you're the Beehive, in which
Speaker 1: case I'm not even on Twitter.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Then we have two more shows left for the warm up, Yes,
Speaker 1: July eighth and then August twelfth.
Speaker 4: Yes, we will see you. There is the second Saturday
Speaker 4: of every month. But you know the decks too, are
Speaker 4: those eight?
Speaker 2: Maybe Mittaya will come say hello.
Speaker 3: Yeah, maybe he'll swing by and maybe will come sing.
Speaker 2: Bring all your sexy Dominican friends please better.
Speaker 5: Yes, your guys show is the ship. By the way,
Speaker 5: Oh that was so much fun I had. I had
Speaker 5: the most f you and then you dashed.
Speaker 3: You could you could. I went to the Dominica's house
Speaker 3: to get fucked and then he didn't do that. That's
Speaker 3: what I did. That's the last. Oh my god, that's right.
Speaker 3: I was like, my gods, I gotta go.
Speaker 2: I should have turned down the Michael that wow, that's im.
Speaker 3: Sorry. I love to get fucked. What I loved. I
Speaker 3: just said I got fucked. I was like, girl, that
Speaker 3: was I had to go. He left us, So I
Speaker 3: did you We're gonna talk to me about this Dominican
Speaker 3: dud a little bit further, but you guys can go.
Speaker 3: Thanks Samurai, thanks so much. You'll always be a part
Speaker 3: of me. No, no, no, no, ineviinitely Boy. Did you
Speaker 3: know you can't escape man because you've always be my baby?
Speaker 5: Know?
Speaker 3: Okay? All right? By boy,