1 00:00:09,640 --> 00:00:12,840 Speaker 1: I started to realize that not being an expert isn't 2 00:00:12,880 --> 00:00:15,200 Speaker 1: a liability, it's a real gift. 3 00:00:15,560 --> 00:00:18,200 Speaker 2: If we don't know something about ourselves at this point 4 00:00:18,239 --> 00:00:20,919 Speaker 2: in our life, it's probably because it's uncomfortable to know. 5 00:00:21,640 --> 00:00:24,520 Speaker 2: If you can die before you die, then you can 6 00:00:24,560 --> 00:00:29,040 Speaker 2: really live. There's a wisdom at death's door. I thought 7 00:00:29,040 --> 00:00:31,840 Speaker 2: I was insane. Yeah, and I didn't know what to 8 00:00:31,920 --> 00:00:34,760 Speaker 2: do because there was no internet. I don't know, man, 9 00:00:34,880 --> 00:00:38,479 Speaker 2: I'm like, I feel like everything is hard. 10 00:00:40,120 --> 00:00:42,920 Speaker 1: Hey, y'all, my name is Kat. I'm a human first 11 00:00:42,960 --> 00:00:46,519 Speaker 1: and a licensed therapist second. And right now I'm inviting 12 00:00:46,520 --> 00:00:49,760 Speaker 1: you into conversations that I hope encourage you to become 13 00:00:50,200 --> 00:00:54,240 Speaker 1: more curious and less judgmental about yourself, others, and the 14 00:00:54,280 --> 00:00:59,680 Speaker 1: world around you. Welcome to You Need Therapy. Hi, guys, 15 00:00:59,680 --> 00:01:02,200 Speaker 1: and while come to a new episode of You Need 16 00:01:02,240 --> 00:01:03,320 Speaker 1: Therapy Podcasts. 17 00:01:03,400 --> 00:01:04,240 Speaker 2: My name is Kat. 18 00:01:04,280 --> 00:01:07,400 Speaker 1: I am the host, and quick reminder before we get 19 00:01:07,440 --> 00:01:11,640 Speaker 1: into today's episode that although I'm a therapist and this 20 00:01:11,680 --> 00:01:15,040 Speaker 1: podcast is called You Need Therapy, and you might need therapy, 21 00:01:15,200 --> 00:01:19,400 Speaker 1: this podcast does not serve as a replacement or a 22 00:01:19,480 --> 00:01:23,520 Speaker 1: substitute for any actual mental health services. However, we hope 23 00:01:23,520 --> 00:01:25,440 Speaker 1: that it can help you at some point wherever you 24 00:01:25,480 --> 00:01:28,759 Speaker 1: are on your journey and wherever you're going now today, 25 00:01:29,000 --> 00:01:32,640 Speaker 1: this week, we are doing something I think is fun. 26 00:01:33,040 --> 00:01:36,520 Speaker 1: For other people, this topic can come as a bit 27 00:01:36,560 --> 00:01:40,800 Speaker 1: more of a complicated situation, and since we are in 28 00:01:40,880 --> 00:01:44,039 Speaker 1: the season of giving. Plus, if you are listening to 29 00:01:44,120 --> 00:01:47,240 Speaker 1: this on Monday, December fourth, the day that it comes out, 30 00:01:47,640 --> 00:01:50,000 Speaker 1: you are listening to this on my birthday. So I 31 00:01:50,040 --> 00:01:54,720 Speaker 1: thought it would be appropriate and also maybe necessary to 32 00:01:54,800 --> 00:01:59,600 Speaker 1: do another gift minded episode. And I say another because 33 00:01:59,760 --> 00:02:03,120 Speaker 1: la year I did one that was more about gifts 34 00:02:03,160 --> 00:02:06,560 Speaker 1: that give back, and this year I thought about doing 35 00:02:06,640 --> 00:02:08,960 Speaker 1: that again, and I even started making the list, and 36 00:02:09,000 --> 00:02:11,600 Speaker 1: I still have that list that I can send out 37 00:02:11,720 --> 00:02:15,960 Speaker 1: to anyone, but I actually opted to focus on this 38 00:02:16,080 --> 00:02:19,799 Speaker 1: year gifts that are good for our mental health. Now, 39 00:02:19,800 --> 00:02:24,079 Speaker 1: if you are someone who suffers from gift purchasing paralysis 40 00:02:24,680 --> 00:02:28,440 Speaker 1: like I sometimes do, this topic might not be as 41 00:02:28,480 --> 00:02:31,960 Speaker 1: exciting and enjoyable as it is to some people. Some 42 00:02:32,000 --> 00:02:34,720 Speaker 1: people just love giving gifts. They get so much joy 43 00:02:34,760 --> 00:02:36,360 Speaker 1: out of it. They can do it all day. They 44 00:02:36,400 --> 00:02:39,440 Speaker 1: don't struggle with what to choose and they just do it. 45 00:02:39,880 --> 00:02:43,240 Speaker 1: But for some people, gift giving can be really overwhelming, 46 00:02:43,880 --> 00:02:47,560 Speaker 1: and searching for the in quote perfect gift can be 47 00:02:47,880 --> 00:02:52,920 Speaker 1: paralyzing for many people, and this can end up leaving 48 00:02:53,200 --> 00:02:56,359 Speaker 1: us waiting until the last minute to buy a gift, 49 00:02:56,960 --> 00:02:59,440 Speaker 1: or overthinking it so much that you don't even allow 50 00:02:59,480 --> 00:03:02,240 Speaker 1: yourself to give what you really want to give, and 51 00:03:02,320 --> 00:03:05,600 Speaker 1: so you lose some of the specialness in what makes 52 00:03:06,160 --> 00:03:09,880 Speaker 1: it important coming from you, because you get so wrapped 53 00:03:09,919 --> 00:03:12,480 Speaker 1: up in how somebody's going to receive it, if they'll 54 00:03:12,520 --> 00:03:14,600 Speaker 1: like it, if it's enough, if it's too much. There's 55 00:03:14,600 --> 00:03:17,360 Speaker 1: just so much that goes into that. Now, I really 56 00:03:17,400 --> 00:03:20,680 Speaker 1: do love giving a meaningful gift. I love a sentimental gift. 57 00:03:21,040 --> 00:03:24,200 Speaker 1: I like to get sentimental gifts as well. I also 58 00:03:24,280 --> 00:03:28,079 Speaker 1: like to get silly gifts, simple gifts, And I also 59 00:03:28,200 --> 00:03:29,560 Speaker 1: love giving gifts that. 60 00:03:29,520 --> 00:03:31,480 Speaker 2: People truly, truly, true, truly love. 61 00:03:31,720 --> 00:03:33,560 Speaker 1: I don't know anybody who doesn't like the feeling of 62 00:03:33,720 --> 00:03:36,120 Speaker 1: giving a gift to somebody and knowing that it's really 63 00:03:36,200 --> 00:03:40,680 Speaker 1: really appreciated. But we put I think, way too much 64 00:03:40,720 --> 00:03:44,640 Speaker 1: pressure to obtain that experience and to get that experience, 65 00:03:45,080 --> 00:03:46,800 Speaker 1: and we put a lot of pressure on ourselves and 66 00:03:46,800 --> 00:03:49,600 Speaker 1: forget that for a gift to be meaningful and thoughtful. 67 00:03:49,680 --> 00:03:54,960 Speaker 1: It doesn't have to be perfect now, especially if your 68 00:03:55,000 --> 00:03:59,240 Speaker 1: love languages gifts. This topic has a lot to unpack, 69 00:03:59,280 --> 00:04:00,800 Speaker 1: and we're not gonna be able to unpack all of it, 70 00:04:00,840 --> 00:04:02,720 Speaker 1: but I did think it was important to at least 71 00:04:02,720 --> 00:04:06,200 Speaker 1: mention it and touch on this stuff, because if you 72 00:04:06,240 --> 00:04:09,280 Speaker 1: are like me, you can actually get really excited about 73 00:04:09,360 --> 00:04:11,680 Speaker 1: Christmas and buying gifts for people and shopping for people, 74 00:04:12,200 --> 00:04:15,120 Speaker 1: and you kind of get in your head about things, 75 00:04:15,240 --> 00:04:18,560 Speaker 1: and you take some of the joy away that you 76 00:04:19,000 --> 00:04:22,480 Speaker 1: deserve to experience during this year and during the experience 77 00:04:22,600 --> 00:04:24,240 Speaker 1: of buying gifts. 78 00:04:23,920 --> 00:04:24,800 Speaker 2: For people that you love. 79 00:04:25,440 --> 00:04:27,400 Speaker 1: Sometimes when you buy a gift for someone, it can 80 00:04:27,640 --> 00:04:30,839 Speaker 1: kind of indicate your feelings about that person. And I'm 81 00:04:30,880 --> 00:04:35,239 Speaker 1: thinking in that case, especially if it's involving a romantic partner, 82 00:04:35,680 --> 00:04:39,560 Speaker 1: especially if it's involving a new romantic partner, and I 83 00:04:39,600 --> 00:04:43,960 Speaker 1: think because of that, it can sometimes feel like it's 84 00:04:44,000 --> 00:04:48,920 Speaker 1: exposing feelings or it can feel like you're saying something 85 00:04:49,560 --> 00:04:52,280 Speaker 1: through a gift that you're giving, and you don't want 86 00:04:52,320 --> 00:04:53,880 Speaker 1: to say too much, but you don't want to say 87 00:04:53,920 --> 00:04:56,000 Speaker 1: not enough, and then you're like, what is this person 88 00:04:56,040 --> 00:05:00,720 Speaker 1: reading into this? What is the symbolize. And like I said, 89 00:05:00,720 --> 00:05:03,440 Speaker 1: this makes me think a lot about new romantic relationships 90 00:05:04,120 --> 00:05:07,240 Speaker 1: and how to decide what's appropriate or not, what says 91 00:05:07,279 --> 00:05:10,839 Speaker 1: too much or what says too little. And I find 92 00:05:10,839 --> 00:05:14,480 Speaker 1: it really helpful to be careful and aware of our 93 00:05:14,560 --> 00:05:20,200 Speaker 1: expectations when giving or receiving gifts. They can be saying something. 94 00:05:20,320 --> 00:05:24,000 Speaker 1: I think that's fair, but they are not always saying something. 95 00:05:25,040 --> 00:05:28,280 Speaker 1: Sometimes gifts can be really deep and there is a 96 00:05:28,320 --> 00:05:33,120 Speaker 1: big meaning and importance behind them symbolism. Sometimes they're not 97 00:05:33,279 --> 00:05:36,600 Speaker 1: that deep, and sometimes that's okay. We get to give 98 00:05:36,640 --> 00:05:39,120 Speaker 1: a gift just for the sake of giving it, and 99 00:05:39,160 --> 00:05:41,000 Speaker 1: it doesn't have to mean anything other than I thought 100 00:05:41,000 --> 00:05:44,119 Speaker 1: you would like this. If my love language is gift 101 00:05:44,120 --> 00:05:48,400 Speaker 1: giving and my friends is not, I have to it 102 00:05:48,400 --> 00:05:51,320 Speaker 1: would be important. Now my love language is not gift giving, 103 00:05:51,360 --> 00:05:54,080 Speaker 1: but if it was, I would really need to recognize 104 00:05:54,080 --> 00:05:56,200 Speaker 1: that no matter what reaction I get from my friend, 105 00:05:56,640 --> 00:05:59,920 Speaker 1: I'm still expressing love. I'm still allowed to express love 106 00:06:00,160 --> 00:06:03,159 Speaker 1: through my action and through my gift, regardless of their 107 00:06:03,680 --> 00:06:07,120 Speaker 1: reaction to it. Because if let's say my friend struggles 108 00:06:07,160 --> 00:06:11,480 Speaker 1: receiving gifts, the reaction she offers in the moment might 109 00:06:11,560 --> 00:06:17,160 Speaker 1: not be about her appreciation or your ability to express 110 00:06:17,200 --> 00:06:18,040 Speaker 1: love through your gift. 111 00:06:18,720 --> 00:06:19,520 Speaker 2: It's really just. 112 00:06:19,480 --> 00:06:23,040 Speaker 1: About her and her own internal working model. People sometimes 113 00:06:23,120 --> 00:06:27,600 Speaker 1: really struggle receiving gifts from people. And if somebody struggles 114 00:06:27,640 --> 00:06:30,680 Speaker 1: receiving the gifts from somebody, it doesn't mean they struggle 115 00:06:30,960 --> 00:06:34,880 Speaker 1: receiving your love from them. And sometimes we write too 116 00:06:34,960 --> 00:06:37,720 Speaker 1: much into that story, and we make up too many 117 00:06:37,760 --> 00:06:40,640 Speaker 1: stories about that. And that's why I say it's important 118 00:06:40,680 --> 00:06:44,480 Speaker 1: for us to be careful and aware of our expectations, 119 00:06:45,040 --> 00:06:48,800 Speaker 1: because I could be setting myself up for failure when 120 00:06:48,800 --> 00:06:52,240 Speaker 1: I don't have to do that. A helpful question to 121 00:06:52,360 --> 00:06:55,799 Speaker 1: ask when we are working ourselves up around choosing gifts, 122 00:06:55,920 --> 00:06:59,800 Speaker 1: is is my fear around or about me or the 123 00:06:59,800 --> 00:07:03,000 Speaker 1: per that I'm buying for. It's about creating an impression 124 00:07:03,279 --> 00:07:06,560 Speaker 1: or a narrative that can be really good information for 125 00:07:06,600 --> 00:07:09,359 Speaker 1: you to have. If you want somebody to have a 126 00:07:09,400 --> 00:07:12,400 Speaker 1: certain impression or story or thought about you based on 127 00:07:12,440 --> 00:07:15,360 Speaker 1: this gift, that is something that is really important and 128 00:07:15,360 --> 00:07:18,280 Speaker 1: good information for you to have, because we can't make 129 00:07:18,360 --> 00:07:21,320 Speaker 1: someone think or feel something about us. 130 00:07:21,800 --> 00:07:23,920 Speaker 2: So if we are aware of that. 131 00:07:23,880 --> 00:07:27,200 Speaker 1: If we're aware that we're wanting to create an impression 132 00:07:27,320 --> 00:07:31,080 Speaker 1: or wanting to force a thought from somebody else, then 133 00:07:31,280 --> 00:07:34,120 Speaker 1: there can be some work done around wanting to control 134 00:07:34,200 --> 00:07:39,200 Speaker 1: perceptions and judgments from others, because we really don't have 135 00:07:39,280 --> 00:07:42,120 Speaker 1: the ability to do that, and when we try super 136 00:07:42,120 --> 00:07:45,200 Speaker 1: hard to make someone think something about us, we end 137 00:07:45,280 --> 00:07:47,400 Speaker 1: up not truly being our authentic selves. 138 00:07:48,240 --> 00:07:49,600 Speaker 2: And if gift giving. 139 00:07:49,400 --> 00:07:54,040 Speaker 1: Wasn't a game in that way, how would your experience change? 140 00:07:54,120 --> 00:07:57,280 Speaker 1: Then we also have to look at in gift giving 141 00:07:57,720 --> 00:08:01,080 Speaker 1: how the paradox of choice sets us up to struggle here. 142 00:08:01,920 --> 00:08:04,120 Speaker 1: I'm sure a lot of you are like me and 143 00:08:04,200 --> 00:08:07,400 Speaker 1: have been stuck on websites like Etsy for hours and 144 00:08:07,480 --> 00:08:11,720 Speaker 1: hours and hours and hours on end, searching for something 145 00:08:12,360 --> 00:08:16,080 Speaker 1: and maybe adding about forty five different things in your 146 00:08:16,120 --> 00:08:18,120 Speaker 1: cart and then ordering nothing. 147 00:08:18,720 --> 00:08:20,440 Speaker 2: I done that countless times. 148 00:08:20,440 --> 00:08:23,200 Speaker 1: I've done that, more than I have actually purchased something 149 00:08:23,240 --> 00:08:27,160 Speaker 1: from Etsy. And the truth and the reality is that 150 00:08:27,200 --> 00:08:30,240 Speaker 1: when we don't know exactly what we're looking for, the 151 00:08:30,240 --> 00:08:32,880 Speaker 1: more options we have, the harder it is for us 152 00:08:32,920 --> 00:08:35,560 Speaker 1: to make a decision. When I was searching for a 153 00:08:35,559 --> 00:08:40,080 Speaker 1: white dress for bridal events earlier this year, I don't 154 00:08:40,080 --> 00:08:42,400 Speaker 1: even want to know how many hours I spent because 155 00:08:42,679 --> 00:08:45,880 Speaker 1: it would bring sadness into my life. I spent so 156 00:08:46,000 --> 00:08:50,320 Speaker 1: many hours on websites like revolve in, like Lulu's looking 157 00:08:50,360 --> 00:08:53,440 Speaker 1: for what I wanted to be the perfect dress. I 158 00:08:53,520 --> 00:08:56,679 Speaker 1: mean hours, and these websites have pages and pages and 159 00:08:56,679 --> 00:09:00,920 Speaker 1: pages and pages, a bajillion pages, one hundred of options, 160 00:09:01,920 --> 00:09:04,800 Speaker 1: and needless to say, I never bought anything from any 161 00:09:04,840 --> 00:09:09,160 Speaker 1: of those stores. I became really, really overwhelmed, and at 162 00:09:09,200 --> 00:09:12,000 Speaker 1: one point I was not even able to distinguish if 163 00:09:12,040 --> 00:09:15,760 Speaker 1: I liked something or not, and then I couldn't choose 164 00:09:15,800 --> 00:09:18,440 Speaker 1: because there are so many options that ended up in 165 00:09:18,440 --> 00:09:19,920 Speaker 1: my cart that I would just click out of the 166 00:09:19,920 --> 00:09:24,360 Speaker 1: website and not go back. And similarly, I was at 167 00:09:24,400 --> 00:09:27,120 Speaker 1: the mall a couple of weeks ago and we walked 168 00:09:27,200 --> 00:09:30,640 Speaker 1: past Aritzia, and Patrick didn't know what that store was, 169 00:09:30,679 --> 00:09:32,560 Speaker 1: and I think he may have been liked, you want 170 00:09:32,559 --> 00:09:34,120 Speaker 1: to go in there? And I said, no, I cannot 171 00:09:34,120 --> 00:09:37,040 Speaker 1: go even go into that store, because stores like that 172 00:09:37,200 --> 00:09:40,960 Speaker 1: have so many options of basically the same thing, but 173 00:09:41,040 --> 00:09:46,360 Speaker 1: with like an iota of a differentiation of it, like 174 00:09:46,400 --> 00:09:47,920 Speaker 1: if you want a white T shirt, they have five 175 00:09:48,000 --> 00:09:53,280 Speaker 1: hundred different kinds, And again it creates that analysis paralysis 176 00:09:53,320 --> 00:09:55,720 Speaker 1: where you can't decide what you want. I need to 177 00:09:55,720 --> 00:09:58,040 Speaker 1: go into a store that has two white T shirts 178 00:09:58,240 --> 00:09:59,640 Speaker 1: and I could decide which one I want. 179 00:09:59,720 --> 00:10:00,160 Speaker 2: That's it. 180 00:10:00,800 --> 00:10:04,040 Speaker 1: And that plays into gift giving, right, So if that's 181 00:10:04,040 --> 00:10:06,720 Speaker 1: happening with me and my experience of buying things for myself, 182 00:10:06,720 --> 00:10:09,079 Speaker 1: it's going to play out into my experience of buying 183 00:10:09,080 --> 00:10:10,080 Speaker 1: things for others too. 184 00:10:10,679 --> 00:10:11,719 Speaker 2: So when we're searching for. 185 00:10:11,679 --> 00:10:14,360 Speaker 1: A gift for someone else and we aren't exactly sure 186 00:10:14,400 --> 00:10:17,840 Speaker 1: what we want to give them, or we just know 187 00:10:17,880 --> 00:10:20,520 Speaker 1: we want it to be perfect, it basically makes it 188 00:10:20,559 --> 00:10:23,880 Speaker 1: impossible to choose and be satisfied because there are so 189 00:10:24,200 --> 00:10:26,840 Speaker 1: many options. They're endless, and so how do I know 190 00:10:26,880 --> 00:10:29,480 Speaker 1: if this is the right one? And knowing that and 191 00:10:29,520 --> 00:10:33,160 Speaker 1: thinking about that brings up memories that I have. 192 00:10:33,960 --> 00:10:35,200 Speaker 2: They feel ridiculous. 193 00:10:35,240 --> 00:10:37,320 Speaker 1: But when I was younger, when I was a kid, 194 00:10:37,440 --> 00:10:41,719 Speaker 1: I would make these extensive Christmas and Birthday lists from 195 00:10:41,760 --> 00:10:45,760 Speaker 1: my parents and they were so exact. I told them 196 00:10:45,760 --> 00:10:49,440 Speaker 1: exactly what I wanted. And at the same time, I 197 00:10:49,600 --> 00:10:52,400 Speaker 1: want to honestly text my parents and be like, you're 198 00:10:52,440 --> 00:10:56,200 Speaker 1: welcome for making buying me gifts so easy as a child, 199 00:10:56,360 --> 00:10:58,959 Speaker 1: because there was no second guessing I would go ahead 200 00:10:59,000 --> 00:11:02,600 Speaker 1: and make my on diliaz dot com, print it out 201 00:11:02,640 --> 00:11:04,800 Speaker 1: and hand it right to them directly. This is what 202 00:11:04,880 --> 00:11:06,560 Speaker 1: I want for Christmas, this is what I want for 203 00:11:06,600 --> 00:11:10,560 Speaker 1: my birthday. There was no confusion and that was really 204 00:11:10,600 --> 00:11:12,360 Speaker 1: great for them back then, other than the fact that 205 00:11:12,440 --> 00:11:16,720 Speaker 1: I probably asked for too much money's worth of items, 206 00:11:17,400 --> 00:11:19,120 Speaker 1: but they knew if they picked something off that list, 207 00:11:19,600 --> 00:11:22,800 Speaker 1: I would be happy. And if you have somebody on 208 00:11:22,840 --> 00:11:24,760 Speaker 1: your list this year, or just in your life in 209 00:11:24,760 --> 00:11:28,200 Speaker 1: general buying gifts at any moment, and they haven't been 210 00:11:28,240 --> 00:11:30,400 Speaker 1: gracious enough like I was as a child, to hand 211 00:11:30,440 --> 00:11:32,600 Speaker 1: you a detailed list of things they would like to receive, 212 00:11:33,120 --> 00:11:38,520 Speaker 1: it is okay to make things simple. And what I 213 00:11:38,559 --> 00:11:41,600 Speaker 1: really want people to hear this year and their gift 214 00:11:41,640 --> 00:11:46,240 Speaker 1: giving is that extravagant, expensive and time consuming doesn't make 215 00:11:46,400 --> 00:11:49,640 Speaker 1: a gift better. I actually have two things that I 216 00:11:49,679 --> 00:11:53,600 Speaker 1: think about when I am buying gifts for people that 217 00:11:53,679 --> 00:11:56,640 Speaker 1: have made it really easy for me to choose things 218 00:11:56,720 --> 00:12:00,640 Speaker 1: at times, and that is I think about products that 219 00:12:00,720 --> 00:12:04,960 Speaker 1: I love, so gifting somebody a product that has been 220 00:12:05,000 --> 00:12:08,959 Speaker 1: helpful for me or I just liked or has meant 221 00:12:09,040 --> 00:12:12,080 Speaker 1: something to me, I go down that route and I 222 00:12:12,160 --> 00:12:15,000 Speaker 1: think of things that just make me think of them, 223 00:12:15,200 --> 00:12:17,640 Speaker 1: and that might not be the most expensive thing, that 224 00:12:17,720 --> 00:12:19,800 Speaker 1: might not be the most original thing, that might not 225 00:12:19,920 --> 00:12:23,520 Speaker 1: be the most personalized thing, but it's something that made 226 00:12:23,559 --> 00:12:27,240 Speaker 1: me think of them. I bought a deck of cards 227 00:12:27,720 --> 00:12:30,200 Speaker 1: they were called like how to Speak in cat for 228 00:12:30,280 --> 00:12:33,720 Speaker 1: a friend this year because I was just walking through 229 00:12:33,760 --> 00:12:35,560 Speaker 1: a gift shop and I saw them, and I also 230 00:12:35,640 --> 00:12:38,280 Speaker 1: knew that their birthday was coming up, and they were 231 00:12:38,280 --> 00:12:41,480 Speaker 1: probably like twelve bucks or something like that, but it 232 00:12:41,520 --> 00:12:43,800 Speaker 1: was a gift that I immediately thought of that person. 233 00:12:43,880 --> 00:12:45,600 Speaker 1: I was like, Oh, this is what I'm getting for them. 234 00:12:46,360 --> 00:12:48,640 Speaker 1: Now do I know if this person is using those 235 00:12:48,679 --> 00:12:52,400 Speaker 1: cards every day? No, they probably shoved in a door somewhere. However, 236 00:12:52,720 --> 00:12:57,400 Speaker 1: it feels really good to receive something that wasn't just 237 00:12:57,480 --> 00:13:00,520 Speaker 1: something random that they picked out of a bag, but 238 00:13:00,600 --> 00:13:03,559 Speaker 1: it was a Oh that is for so and so 239 00:13:04,360 --> 00:13:07,840 Speaker 1: and so, I am going to offer you a gift 240 00:13:08,360 --> 00:13:12,600 Speaker 1: this year, and that is a list of products that 241 00:13:12,640 --> 00:13:16,320 Speaker 1: I love, specifically a list of products that I love 242 00:13:16,520 --> 00:13:20,599 Speaker 1: that also promote mental health, well being, and healthier relationships. 243 00:13:21,520 --> 00:13:23,760 Speaker 1: So these are gifts that could be great for anyone 244 00:13:23,880 --> 00:13:26,360 Speaker 1: regardless if you know the status of their mental health 245 00:13:26,480 --> 00:13:30,040 Speaker 1: or not. And I actually made a tab on my 246 00:13:30,080 --> 00:13:32,880 Speaker 1: Amazon storefront page where you can go and find a 247 00:13:32,880 --> 00:13:34,720 Speaker 1: lot of these gifts and the ones that are not 248 00:13:35,040 --> 00:13:38,240 Speaker 1: on Amazon. I'm going to just link the websites to 249 00:13:38,280 --> 00:13:41,400 Speaker 1: those gifts in the show notes, so if anything speaks 250 00:13:41,400 --> 00:13:44,160 Speaker 1: out to you, you can just easily access them there. 251 00:13:44,840 --> 00:13:47,720 Speaker 2: And these, again, are all things that I. 252 00:13:47,679 --> 00:13:50,880 Speaker 1: Appreciate and I like. They're not random things that I googled. 253 00:13:51,080 --> 00:13:54,080 Speaker 1: They are things that I've either received, things that I've used, 254 00:13:54,200 --> 00:13:56,520 Speaker 1: or things that I have given to others. A lot 255 00:13:56,520 --> 00:13:58,960 Speaker 1: of things that I actually have in my office or 256 00:13:59,120 --> 00:14:02,480 Speaker 1: at my house. So hopefully this list helps simplify gift 257 00:14:02,480 --> 00:14:04,560 Speaker 1: giving for you this year and allows it to be 258 00:14:04,679 --> 00:14:07,240 Speaker 1: less about making sure you get the perfect gift for 259 00:14:07,280 --> 00:14:10,800 Speaker 1: somebody and making sure you leave the perfect impression, and 260 00:14:10,880 --> 00:14:13,040 Speaker 1: allow it to be more about just doing something kind 261 00:14:13,080 --> 00:14:15,480 Speaker 1: for somebody and letting somebody know that you care about 262 00:14:15,480 --> 00:14:18,160 Speaker 1: them by going out of your way and getting something 263 00:14:18,200 --> 00:14:20,800 Speaker 1: for them like that alone is meaningful and thoughtful. 264 00:14:21,080 --> 00:14:22,600 Speaker 2: So here's my list. 265 00:14:28,720 --> 00:14:30,680 Speaker 1: The first thing on my list is probably going to 266 00:14:30,720 --> 00:14:33,400 Speaker 1: be no surprise to anybody if you have been a 267 00:14:33,400 --> 00:14:36,000 Speaker 1: long time listener because I'm sure I've mentioned these multiple times, 268 00:14:36,320 --> 00:14:39,920 Speaker 1: but conversation cards, so the past couple of years, conversation 269 00:14:40,040 --> 00:14:42,360 Speaker 1: cards have really really taken off. And what I mean 270 00:14:42,400 --> 00:14:45,800 Speaker 1: by conversation cards are these decks that have been created 271 00:14:45,800 --> 00:14:49,360 Speaker 1: by different people, various people that can be used with 272 00:14:49,800 --> 00:14:53,280 Speaker 1: friends or partners or dating or just really in any 273 00:14:53,280 --> 00:14:57,080 Speaker 1: scenario to help prompt conversations and ask questions that might 274 00:14:57,120 --> 00:15:01,360 Speaker 1: not naturally come up in every day conversation and really 275 00:15:01,360 --> 00:15:04,840 Speaker 1: allows your brain to start thinking differently and can take 276 00:15:04,880 --> 00:15:07,920 Speaker 1: you down different tangents that you might not naturally would go, 277 00:15:07,960 --> 00:15:10,360 Speaker 1: and just it's just fun. I think for a lot 278 00:15:10,360 --> 00:15:14,680 Speaker 1: of times these cards. I have a deck called Concrete Conversations, 279 00:15:14,920 --> 00:15:19,160 Speaker 1: and they have different kinds of decks, like ones for friends, 280 00:15:19,240 --> 00:15:22,080 Speaker 1: one for relationships, so you can pick which one would 281 00:15:22,080 --> 00:15:24,800 Speaker 1: be appropriate based on the person you're giving. I really 282 00:15:24,880 --> 00:15:27,720 Speaker 1: like those cards, and they are things that I have 283 00:15:27,880 --> 00:15:31,320 Speaker 1: used on vacations, just border around the house. I've used 284 00:15:31,320 --> 00:15:35,800 Speaker 1: them with clients to help prompt them with certain things, 285 00:15:36,080 --> 00:15:40,560 Speaker 1: and I really love those. So Concrete Conversations for a friend. 286 00:15:40,600 --> 00:15:43,280 Speaker 1: I'm also a big fan of the Friendship deck, which 287 00:15:43,480 --> 00:15:47,760 Speaker 1: was created by a former guest of the podcast Blake 288 00:15:48,160 --> 00:15:51,400 Speaker 1: Blake and Beckler, who has a tongue twister of a name, 289 00:15:52,120 --> 00:15:54,760 Speaker 1: but she created the Friendship Deck as a way to 290 00:15:54,800 --> 00:15:58,800 Speaker 1: deepen friendships and really allow friendships to become more vulnerable 291 00:15:58,960 --> 00:16:01,720 Speaker 1: and just get places that you would normally go to 292 00:16:01,800 --> 00:16:05,880 Speaker 1: create more meaningful relationships. And I love them, so I'm 293 00:16:05,880 --> 00:16:08,520 Speaker 1: gonna link those as well. I'll also link the episode 294 00:16:08,520 --> 00:16:10,160 Speaker 1: that Blake was in in case you guys want to 295 00:16:10,160 --> 00:16:13,400 Speaker 1: listen to that. And if you're looking for more of 296 00:16:13,440 --> 00:16:18,400 Speaker 1: a game type feel, you can also get Where Should 297 00:16:18,440 --> 00:16:23,320 Speaker 1: We Begin, which is a storytelling slash conversation game created 298 00:16:23,360 --> 00:16:28,280 Speaker 1: by Esta Perell who's a relationship couple's therapists, and that 299 00:16:28,600 --> 00:16:31,600 Speaker 1: makes these conversations more into a game which can at 300 00:16:31,600 --> 00:16:34,600 Speaker 1: a different element and be really fun. So my first 301 00:16:34,680 --> 00:16:38,040 Speaker 1: idea conversation cards. They could be good for anybody, and 302 00:16:38,120 --> 00:16:40,760 Speaker 1: I love them for myself as well. Moving on to 303 00:16:41,120 --> 00:16:45,600 Speaker 1: number two affirmation cards, So I'm talking about more cards. 304 00:16:46,080 --> 00:16:49,240 Speaker 1: This is similar to conversation cards and that one it's 305 00:16:49,240 --> 00:16:51,560 Speaker 1: a deck of cards, but two there's a million of 306 00:16:51,560 --> 00:16:54,160 Speaker 1: these kinds of things to choose from. So I'm going 307 00:16:54,240 --> 00:16:57,080 Speaker 1: to make this easy for you, Like I said, my 308 00:16:57,680 --> 00:17:02,800 Speaker 1: favorite type of affirmation cards will always be affirmators. I 309 00:17:02,840 --> 00:17:05,040 Speaker 1: have given these to so many people that I can't 310 00:17:05,080 --> 00:17:06,840 Speaker 1: give them to people anymore because I don't know who 311 00:17:06,880 --> 00:17:09,600 Speaker 1: I've already gifted them to. But they are just these 312 00:17:09,640 --> 00:17:13,359 Speaker 1: affirmation cards that also are a little silly, and so 313 00:17:13,920 --> 00:17:16,160 Speaker 1: they can brighten your way intwo. For example, I'm gonna 314 00:17:16,160 --> 00:17:19,919 Speaker 1: pull a couple of them. So here's one. It says power, 315 00:17:20,880 --> 00:17:24,439 Speaker 1: and underneath the word power, it says, I am strong, 316 00:17:24,600 --> 00:17:27,480 Speaker 1: I am grounded, I am powerful. I am like a 317 00:17:27,520 --> 00:17:31,040 Speaker 1: cross between a dinosaur and a tank, but not a 318 00:17:31,040 --> 00:17:34,280 Speaker 1: tank that is used for war. I am like a peaceful, 319 00:17:34,480 --> 00:17:37,879 Speaker 1: loving dino tank who feels so strong and it doesn't 320 00:17:37,920 --> 00:17:41,640 Speaker 1: need to do anything but be. And then here's another one. 321 00:17:41,760 --> 00:17:45,119 Speaker 1: This one says don't take it personally, and underneath that 322 00:17:45,400 --> 00:17:48,680 Speaker 1: it says, if someone starts to speak unkindly to me, 323 00:17:48,840 --> 00:17:51,800 Speaker 1: I'll remember that they've got something going on that has 324 00:17:51,880 --> 00:17:54,600 Speaker 1: nothing to do with me, Like maybe they just poop 325 00:17:54,680 --> 00:17:55,240 Speaker 1: their pants. 326 00:17:55,600 --> 00:17:57,040 Speaker 2: Yeah, that's probably it. 327 00:17:58,200 --> 00:18:00,919 Speaker 1: So you see, they're just like silly, but also they 328 00:18:01,240 --> 00:18:03,440 Speaker 1: will bring a smile to your faith. But also they're 329 00:18:03,520 --> 00:18:06,639 Speaker 1: helpful and they say things that actually are true and 330 00:18:06,680 --> 00:18:10,320 Speaker 1: that we need to hear sometimes if affirmators are not 331 00:18:10,480 --> 00:18:13,840 Speaker 1: your jam. You can also get the you Got This cards, 332 00:18:14,359 --> 00:18:16,679 Speaker 1: which is a deck of cards with different quotes on 333 00:18:16,960 --> 00:18:19,399 Speaker 1: each card, and that one is a great gift, I 334 00:18:19,440 --> 00:18:22,800 Speaker 1: think for anybody who's going through something really tough, or 335 00:18:22,920 --> 00:18:25,679 Speaker 1: somebody who's starting something new. It's just an encouragement. You 336 00:18:25,760 --> 00:18:30,879 Speaker 1: got this Our next gift number three weighted blanket. So 337 00:18:31,240 --> 00:18:33,399 Speaker 1: I have had one of these in my office since 338 00:18:33,880 --> 00:18:37,120 Speaker 1: literally forever, and I love having it as a resource 339 00:18:37,119 --> 00:18:39,600 Speaker 1: for clients when they're feeling anxious or having a hard 340 00:18:39,640 --> 00:18:42,960 Speaker 1: time just grounding themselves in whatever. 341 00:18:42,680 --> 00:18:44,200 Speaker 2: We're doing in session. 342 00:18:45,080 --> 00:18:47,159 Speaker 1: And then I never had one in my house, but 343 00:18:47,320 --> 00:18:49,120 Speaker 1: a couple of years ago, my mom bought me one 344 00:18:49,720 --> 00:18:53,000 Speaker 1: for my birthday randomly. I didn't even give her a 345 00:18:53,000 --> 00:18:54,359 Speaker 1: list of things they wanted, and she bought it for 346 00:18:54,480 --> 00:18:57,400 Speaker 1: me randomly, And it's honestly one of the best things 347 00:18:57,440 --> 00:19:00,640 Speaker 1: she's ever given me. And if you struggle with sleeping 348 00:19:00,680 --> 00:19:01,920 Speaker 1: in general, it's amazing. 349 00:19:02,560 --> 00:19:06,639 Speaker 2: Plus it's just like cozy and like everything else. 350 00:19:06,720 --> 00:19:10,440 Speaker 1: There are a million different kinds, brands, styles all of that. 351 00:19:11,000 --> 00:19:14,360 Speaker 1: I have a large knitted one and I love that 352 00:19:14,440 --> 00:19:18,960 Speaker 1: because one it looks nice in the home, and it 353 00:19:19,000 --> 00:19:20,959 Speaker 1: also doesn't make you super hot because there's a lot 354 00:19:21,000 --> 00:19:22,680 Speaker 1: of holes in it, so you. 355 00:19:22,640 --> 00:19:23,840 Speaker 2: Can use it anytime of the year. 356 00:19:23,880 --> 00:19:25,240 Speaker 1: I can use it in the summer, or I can 357 00:19:25,280 --> 00:19:28,160 Speaker 1: just put it over top of my blanket in the winter. 358 00:19:28,920 --> 00:19:31,320 Speaker 1: Mine is about fifteen pounds and I wouldn't really want 359 00:19:31,359 --> 00:19:35,040 Speaker 1: anything heavier than that. But you can also get heavier ones, 360 00:19:35,080 --> 00:19:37,840 Speaker 1: and you can also get lighter ones for kids, and 361 00:19:37,880 --> 00:19:40,040 Speaker 1: I have linked the one I have on my Amazon page. 362 00:19:40,600 --> 00:19:43,720 Speaker 1: They're a little bit more pricey than affirmation cards, but 363 00:19:43,880 --> 00:19:46,560 Speaker 1: if you are buying a gift, and more expensive gift, 364 00:19:46,600 --> 00:19:50,840 Speaker 1: I really do strongly suggest this as something that you 365 00:19:51,040 --> 00:19:55,560 Speaker 1: look for. Now number four we're going back down in 366 00:19:55,680 --> 00:19:59,480 Speaker 1: the expensive category because number four is just cozy socks. 367 00:19:59,560 --> 00:20:02,679 Speaker 1: And to some people this might seem like the lame gift. 368 00:20:02,960 --> 00:20:06,920 Speaker 1: But I actually asked for socks this year, not specifically, 369 00:20:06,960 --> 00:20:09,879 Speaker 1: but I just said randomly to Patrick, which she has 370 00:20:09,880 --> 00:20:11,840 Speaker 1: a list of things when I say things, which I 371 00:20:11,880 --> 00:20:13,600 Speaker 1: think is really cute. But when I mention things that 372 00:20:13,640 --> 00:20:16,440 Speaker 1: I want or that I need, he writes it down 373 00:20:16,440 --> 00:20:18,359 Speaker 1: in his phone so he can go to that later 374 00:20:18,440 --> 00:20:24,400 Speaker 1: when he is getting paralysis from gift giving, but I 375 00:20:24,440 --> 00:20:26,560 Speaker 1: told him I wanted socks this year. I was like, 376 00:20:26,560 --> 00:20:29,080 Speaker 1: if you ever just want to buy me something, give 377 00:20:29,119 --> 00:20:32,080 Speaker 1: me some socks. And there are two kinds that I 378 00:20:32,160 --> 00:20:37,000 Speaker 1: specifically love, Barefoot dreams socks and Bomba socks. I like 379 00:20:37,040 --> 00:20:40,720 Speaker 1: the Barefoot dreams for lounging at home with my weighted blanket, 380 00:20:41,400 --> 00:20:44,240 Speaker 1: and then the bombas for like every day and for 381 00:20:44,280 --> 00:20:47,280 Speaker 1: like working out and stuff. And a big part of 382 00:20:47,359 --> 00:20:50,159 Speaker 1: taking care of our mental health is finding comfort, and 383 00:20:50,200 --> 00:20:53,840 Speaker 1: this is a very practical, inexpensive, and easy way to 384 00:20:53,880 --> 00:20:57,160 Speaker 1: do that. I think we need to put more respect 385 00:20:57,240 --> 00:20:59,879 Speaker 1: on the gift of socks. We need some more justice 386 00:21:00,119 --> 00:21:04,320 Speaker 1: or the gift of socks, because I personally love getting 387 00:21:04,440 --> 00:21:07,560 Speaker 1: a pair of socks, a pair of good socks. They're 388 00:21:07,600 --> 00:21:08,960 Speaker 1: one of those things that you don't really want to 389 00:21:08,960 --> 00:21:12,000 Speaker 1: spend a lot of money on yourself, but you like 390 00:21:12,080 --> 00:21:16,280 Speaker 1: to get from other people. So you know, when in college, 391 00:21:16,440 --> 00:21:18,600 Speaker 1: I remember when I had to like buy shampoo or 392 00:21:18,640 --> 00:21:20,320 Speaker 1: toilet paper or any of those kind of things that 393 00:21:20,359 --> 00:21:22,639 Speaker 1: you're like annoyed having to spend your money on. I 394 00:21:22,640 --> 00:21:24,960 Speaker 1: would get like literally the cheapest thing I could get. 395 00:21:25,240 --> 00:21:28,359 Speaker 1: But when like my mom was in town taking me 396 00:21:28,840 --> 00:21:31,480 Speaker 1: shopping for things that I need, I would like splurge 397 00:21:31,480 --> 00:21:34,159 Speaker 1: and get the good stuff. And that was mostly not 398 00:21:34,200 --> 00:21:36,760 Speaker 1: because I was taking advantage of her, but because I 399 00:21:36,800 --> 00:21:38,600 Speaker 1: actually did not have the money to spend on any 400 00:21:38,640 --> 00:21:41,440 Speaker 1: of that stuff at the time. Maybe I was taking 401 00:21:41,480 --> 00:21:44,359 Speaker 1: it a little bit advantage of her kindness, but we 402 00:21:44,400 --> 00:21:48,040 Speaker 1: can process that later anyway. It's the same thing with socks, 403 00:21:48,080 --> 00:21:49,960 Speaker 1: Like it's one of those things. If you need new socks, 404 00:21:50,000 --> 00:21:53,440 Speaker 1: you're like, oh, okay, I'll just get these. Are socks 405 00:21:53,440 --> 00:21:56,160 Speaker 1: that important? But if somebody's like, what kind of socks 406 00:21:56,160 --> 00:21:58,120 Speaker 1: do you want, You're like, oh, I want the kind 407 00:21:58,119 --> 00:22:00,880 Speaker 1: that are twenty dollars a pare. And I don't necessarily 408 00:22:00,960 --> 00:22:03,080 Speaker 1: think that Bambas are twenty five dollars of pair. I'm 409 00:22:03,119 --> 00:22:05,960 Speaker 1: not sure exactly how much they are. However, I do 410 00:22:06,119 --> 00:22:09,520 Speaker 1: know that they have a giving back initiative where every 411 00:22:09,520 --> 00:22:13,320 Speaker 1: item that is purchased, they actually donate an item to 412 00:22:13,359 --> 00:22:17,120 Speaker 1: somebody in need. Plus right now as I am saying this, 413 00:22:17,720 --> 00:22:19,280 Speaker 1: so I don't know if it's still going on, they 414 00:22:19,280 --> 00:22:21,320 Speaker 1: are doing a sale on their website and it's twenty 415 00:22:21,359 --> 00:22:24,080 Speaker 1: percent off of your entire purchase when you use the 416 00:22:24,119 --> 00:22:27,160 Speaker 1: code that's on their website, which is Comfort twenty. And 417 00:22:27,520 --> 00:22:29,040 Speaker 1: I'm just saying that has nothing to do with me. 418 00:22:29,119 --> 00:22:31,600 Speaker 1: I just googled the website and it was on the website. 419 00:22:32,160 --> 00:22:35,159 Speaker 1: So hopefully that's still happening. When you guys, listen to 420 00:22:35,200 --> 00:22:38,720 Speaker 1: this and you can take advantage of that, because they. 421 00:22:38,560 --> 00:22:40,680 Speaker 2: Are really the best socks. 422 00:22:41,280 --> 00:22:43,359 Speaker 1: And if you know, you know, and if you don't know, 423 00:22:43,760 --> 00:22:45,679 Speaker 1: maybe you can get some and then you will be 424 00:22:45,720 --> 00:22:47,199 Speaker 1: in the know, and then you'll want to gift them 425 00:22:47,240 --> 00:22:57,000 Speaker 1: to people in the future. Number five coloring books and pens. 426 00:22:57,400 --> 00:23:00,119 Speaker 1: And yes, if you are like, what is this for 427 00:23:00,160 --> 00:23:02,800 Speaker 1: our children, sure you can get that for your children. Also, 428 00:23:02,840 --> 00:23:05,320 Speaker 1: adult coloring books are a thing, and they are such 429 00:23:05,400 --> 00:23:10,120 Speaker 1: a helpful self soothing tool and something that a lot 430 00:23:10,119 --> 00:23:11,880 Speaker 1: of times people don't know that they need or want 431 00:23:11,960 --> 00:23:14,760 Speaker 1: until they have them as well. And they are also 432 00:23:14,840 --> 00:23:18,440 Speaker 1: great when you're traveling and if you're someone who either 433 00:23:18,480 --> 00:23:22,119 Speaker 1: doesn't like to read or somebody who can't read while moving. 434 00:23:22,720 --> 00:23:25,320 Speaker 1: I know I can't read while in like a bus 435 00:23:25,400 --> 00:23:27,679 Speaker 1: or a car or anything like that, but I can color, 436 00:23:27,800 --> 00:23:29,960 Speaker 1: and it is something that can be. 437 00:23:29,880 --> 00:23:31,520 Speaker 2: Really helpful to one past time. 438 00:23:31,560 --> 00:23:35,560 Speaker 1: But also it's a really good resource for people who 439 00:23:36,200 --> 00:23:39,359 Speaker 1: need to create some self soothing practices in their lives, 440 00:23:39,440 --> 00:23:42,200 Speaker 1: so coloring books and pens. I have some of those 441 00:23:42,240 --> 00:23:46,560 Speaker 1: in that Amazon page as well. Next, a diffuser, and 442 00:23:46,920 --> 00:23:50,760 Speaker 1: I found this year the cutest diffuser. It looks really nice. 443 00:23:51,040 --> 00:23:52,640 Speaker 1: It's not like an eyesore. I think some of them 444 00:23:52,680 --> 00:23:55,240 Speaker 1: can just like be bulky and take up space. But 445 00:23:55,280 --> 00:23:58,159 Speaker 1: I found one that I really liked and I have 446 00:23:58,240 --> 00:24:00,560 Speaker 1: that in my office. I tried out the pure diffuser, 447 00:24:00,600 --> 00:24:02,640 Speaker 1: which is the one that plugs into the wall and 448 00:24:03,040 --> 00:24:06,080 Speaker 1: you can control it from your phone, and I like 449 00:24:06,119 --> 00:24:09,480 Speaker 1: the sense, but it's not as exactly like an essential 450 00:24:09,520 --> 00:24:13,800 Speaker 1: oil diffuser, where you get to actually have the experience 451 00:24:13,840 --> 00:24:18,119 Speaker 1: of the light and the steam and the real essential 452 00:24:18,119 --> 00:24:20,200 Speaker 1: oil is coming out of it. It just feels very different 453 00:24:20,359 --> 00:24:24,280 Speaker 1: and creates a different vibe. So I highly recommend a 454 00:24:24,520 --> 00:24:28,200 Speaker 1: essential oil diffuser. There are tons of those on Amazon. 455 00:24:28,400 --> 00:24:31,080 Speaker 1: I again, to make this easier for you, have put 456 00:24:31,320 --> 00:24:33,119 Speaker 1: the one that I got in my office on that 457 00:24:33,200 --> 00:24:35,679 Speaker 1: page and then the next one. 458 00:24:35,840 --> 00:24:36,080 Speaker 2: Seven. 459 00:24:36,200 --> 00:24:38,320 Speaker 1: This is going to be a weird idea, but I 460 00:24:38,359 --> 00:24:41,160 Speaker 1: also think it's a really good idea at the same time, 461 00:24:41,280 --> 00:24:46,359 Speaker 1: and it is a cute medicine pill case. And I 462 00:24:46,480 --> 00:24:50,520 Speaker 1: like this because it normalizes medication and it's very unexpected. 463 00:24:51,119 --> 00:24:53,159 Speaker 1: So this might be a gift that you give to 464 00:24:53,200 --> 00:24:57,119 Speaker 1: somebody that you maybe know takes medication, and also can 465 00:24:57,160 --> 00:24:58,879 Speaker 1: be a gift for somebody who struggles to remember to 466 00:24:58,920 --> 00:25:02,040 Speaker 1: take their medication too, because that can help them kind 467 00:25:02,080 --> 00:25:04,360 Speaker 1: of remember if they did or didn't do it that day, 468 00:25:04,400 --> 00:25:05,040 Speaker 1: because that can. 469 00:25:04,960 --> 00:25:05,360 Speaker 2: Be a thing. 470 00:25:06,280 --> 00:25:07,879 Speaker 1: But it also I just like the idea that it 471 00:25:07,920 --> 00:25:11,320 Speaker 1: normalizes it, and it's okay to want to make your 472 00:25:11,400 --> 00:25:14,560 Speaker 1: pillcase fashionable. It makes it a little bit more fun 473 00:25:14,600 --> 00:25:15,639 Speaker 1: if it feels like a drag. 474 00:25:16,200 --> 00:25:17,000 Speaker 2: So cute. 475 00:25:17,040 --> 00:25:21,320 Speaker 1: Medicine case number eight, which is the second to last idea, 476 00:25:22,080 --> 00:25:28,480 Speaker 1: is essentially a tea slash, teapot and other temperature soothing things. 477 00:25:28,880 --> 00:25:30,480 Speaker 1: And what I mean by that is one of the 478 00:25:30,480 --> 00:25:32,399 Speaker 1: things that I recommend to clients, or some of the 479 00:25:32,400 --> 00:25:35,520 Speaker 1: things that I recommend to clients often for ways to 480 00:25:35,560 --> 00:25:40,440 Speaker 1: self soothe and regulate heavy or overwhelming emotions and feelings 481 00:25:40,560 --> 00:25:44,840 Speaker 1: at home include things like face masks that have a 482 00:25:44,840 --> 00:25:49,399 Speaker 1: cooling effect, ice rollers, or hot tea. And the tea 483 00:25:49,440 --> 00:25:52,080 Speaker 1: is helpful because it's a warm sensation that you can 484 00:25:52,160 --> 00:25:56,440 Speaker 1: kind of move your brain from emotional to physical sensation 485 00:25:56,560 --> 00:25:59,320 Speaker 1: and focus on that and help you stay present. It 486 00:25:59,400 --> 00:26:03,200 Speaker 1: also has aromatherapy Part two, so it's creating two physical 487 00:26:03,200 --> 00:26:06,160 Speaker 1: sensations that can pull you out of that really emotional spiral. 488 00:26:06,960 --> 00:26:10,800 Speaker 2: So I love it. I've linked a couple teapots on 489 00:26:10,840 --> 00:26:14,480 Speaker 2: that page. One of them is the one that I. 490 00:26:14,440 --> 00:26:17,160 Speaker 1: Was actually gifted a year ago as a housewaring gift, 491 00:26:17,280 --> 00:26:20,119 Speaker 1: and it is really cute. It has like one of 492 00:26:20,119 --> 00:26:22,600 Speaker 1: these long spout neck things. I don't know what you 493 00:26:22,720 --> 00:26:25,080 Speaker 1: call that, but it kind of makes making tea fun, 494 00:26:25,480 --> 00:26:28,960 Speaker 1: you know, because the little spout thing is cool to 495 00:26:29,000 --> 00:26:29,480 Speaker 1: pour out of. 496 00:26:30,160 --> 00:26:32,680 Speaker 2: I think I like to find joy in the little things. 497 00:26:32,760 --> 00:26:36,080 Speaker 1: And then I've also linked a couple face mass and iemass, 498 00:26:36,080 --> 00:26:38,000 Speaker 1: but really, any of those kinds of things, it doesn't 499 00:26:38,040 --> 00:26:41,760 Speaker 1: matter which one it is. If it cools, then that's great. 500 00:26:41,880 --> 00:26:45,240 Speaker 1: If the teapot gets hot, then that's great. That's really 501 00:26:45,240 --> 00:26:46,760 Speaker 1: all we're looking for. We don't have to make it 502 00:26:46,800 --> 00:26:52,080 Speaker 1: super complicated. So temperature regulating things is number eight on 503 00:26:52,760 --> 00:26:56,200 Speaker 1: my list. And then my last thing, I've combined two 504 00:26:56,280 --> 00:26:59,840 Speaker 1: things kind of and really there are two companies that 505 00:27:00,359 --> 00:27:04,160 Speaker 1: both have missions that I really love and can stand behind, 506 00:27:04,760 --> 00:27:07,600 Speaker 1: and I group them together because the gift idea is 507 00:27:07,720 --> 00:27:11,959 Speaker 1: very similar. So the companies are the Giving Keys and Able, 508 00:27:12,520 --> 00:27:14,000 Speaker 1: and I'm not sure if they are both on the 509 00:27:14,040 --> 00:27:16,240 Speaker 1: list last year because they both give back and they 510 00:27:16,280 --> 00:27:19,840 Speaker 1: both have really strong missions that I believe in. The 511 00:27:20,119 --> 00:27:25,800 Speaker 1: Giving Keys started as stamped keys with words like strong, brave, believe, etc. 512 00:27:26,680 --> 00:27:31,320 Speaker 1: And the goal behind these was to gift a necklace 513 00:27:31,440 --> 00:27:34,480 Speaker 1: to somebody that had a word that might mean somebody, 514 00:27:34,520 --> 00:27:37,400 Speaker 1: that person that you think that person might need, and 515 00:27:37,880 --> 00:27:41,560 Speaker 1: eventually that person then would give that necklace to somebody else, 516 00:27:41,640 --> 00:27:44,560 Speaker 1: so it just continues to cycle through people that need it. 517 00:27:45,240 --> 00:27:47,800 Speaker 1: And I really like that they actually use like real 518 00:27:47,840 --> 00:27:50,959 Speaker 1: old keys that they find and stamp those words on. 519 00:27:51,520 --> 00:27:54,280 Speaker 1: So it's like the gift that keeps giving, except it's 520 00:27:54,560 --> 00:27:57,120 Speaker 1: much better than the Jelly of the Month club from 521 00:27:57,440 --> 00:28:00,840 Speaker 1: Christmas Vacation. Hopefully you guys have all se that movie 522 00:28:00,960 --> 00:28:02,760 Speaker 1: aluse you have no idea what I'm talking about. But 523 00:28:02,920 --> 00:28:05,200 Speaker 1: that's the gift that keeps giving that I'd actually want 524 00:28:05,200 --> 00:28:07,360 Speaker 1: to be a part of. And that's also coming from 525 00:28:07,359 --> 00:28:09,239 Speaker 1: somebody who doesn't like Jelly. So maybe we should put 526 00:28:09,280 --> 00:28:11,359 Speaker 1: Jelly of the Month Club on here. As an idea 527 00:28:11,880 --> 00:28:16,159 Speaker 1: that can just be our honorary number ten. Now, The 528 00:28:16,200 --> 00:28:19,520 Speaker 1: Giving Keys actually has a really expansive collection on their website. 529 00:28:19,520 --> 00:28:21,520 Speaker 2: Now they offer a lot more items. 530 00:28:21,520 --> 00:28:24,600 Speaker 1: But I am really again to make this easier for 531 00:28:24,640 --> 00:28:29,560 Speaker 1: you guys, really suggest going with that original item, the 532 00:28:29,560 --> 00:28:32,760 Speaker 1: original pieces as an easy way to celebrate or encourage somebody. 533 00:28:33,400 --> 00:28:37,119 Speaker 1: And then able which is another company that has I 534 00:28:37,119 --> 00:28:38,920 Speaker 1: mean they have tons of stuff. They do leather goods, 535 00:28:39,000 --> 00:28:41,000 Speaker 1: they do clothing, now, they have some home goods, they 536 00:28:41,000 --> 00:28:44,160 Speaker 1: have shoes. They also have a jewelry line. Now, this 537 00:28:44,320 --> 00:28:47,480 Speaker 1: jewelry line was actually started a long time ago by 538 00:28:47,560 --> 00:28:51,960 Speaker 1: Gracie Moekler who is now the founder of Emergency Confetti, 539 00:28:52,440 --> 00:28:55,280 Speaker 1: And if you haven't heard of Emergency Confetti, it's definitely 540 00:28:55,320 --> 00:28:58,200 Speaker 1: worth checking out and also has a wonderful mission behind it. 541 00:28:58,840 --> 00:29:03,320 Speaker 1: And able Able's jewelry line has jewelry that you can 542 00:29:03,360 --> 00:29:10,160 Speaker 1: also personalize. And their company helps give job opportunities to 543 00:29:10,680 --> 00:29:16,200 Speaker 1: women who are coming out of less than desirable situations, 544 00:29:16,360 --> 00:29:21,840 Speaker 1: whether that's sobriety or just dangerous living situations or incarcerations 545 00:29:21,880 --> 00:29:24,320 Speaker 1: stuff like that. They help get women back on their 546 00:29:24,320 --> 00:29:27,480 Speaker 1: feet and allow them to do some meaningful work. That 547 00:29:27,520 --> 00:29:31,400 Speaker 1: can create some self esteem, some sense of self and 548 00:29:31,960 --> 00:29:35,360 Speaker 1: all that good stuff that we really need to be successful. 549 00:29:36,080 --> 00:29:38,640 Speaker 1: And so I love the mission behind it. And like 550 00:29:38,680 --> 00:29:41,960 Speaker 1: I said, they have jewelry that you can personalize. And 551 00:29:42,720 --> 00:29:46,120 Speaker 1: last year for Christmas, I gave the three quarts Therapy 552 00:29:46,160 --> 00:29:51,120 Speaker 1: Therapists bracelets that said both slash and on them if 553 00:29:51,120 --> 00:29:54,680 Speaker 1: you know you know again. And recently I got one 554 00:29:54,680 --> 00:29:57,320 Speaker 1: of their necklaces. It's like a long bar and it 555 00:29:57,400 --> 00:30:00,840 Speaker 1: has four sides to it, and I put on the 556 00:30:00,840 --> 00:30:03,040 Speaker 1: the person's name, and then on each side I put 557 00:30:03,080 --> 00:30:06,160 Speaker 1: a word that describes them stamped a word that describes 558 00:30:06,200 --> 00:30:09,040 Speaker 1: them on there. And that's just a fun way to 559 00:30:09,040 --> 00:30:11,680 Speaker 1: celebrate somebody and at the same time pretty simple. 560 00:30:12,440 --> 00:30:14,280 Speaker 2: So there you guys have it. 561 00:30:14,840 --> 00:30:19,200 Speaker 1: There is my short but long list of easy gift 562 00:30:19,320 --> 00:30:23,800 Speaker 1: ideas that honestly are more than just gifts. And I 563 00:30:23,800 --> 00:30:25,520 Speaker 1: feel like I've said this a million times, but I 564 00:30:25,560 --> 00:30:27,800 Speaker 1: will link all of those things so you can find 565 00:30:27,800 --> 00:30:31,200 Speaker 1: them for yourselves easily. We're in the spirit of ease 566 00:30:31,800 --> 00:30:33,760 Speaker 1: in the show notes, so you can find that there 567 00:30:33,840 --> 00:30:37,120 Speaker 1: and you can grab whatever speaks to you, if anything does. Also, 568 00:30:37,520 --> 00:30:41,120 Speaker 1: feel free to gift something to yourself because that is 569 00:30:41,160 --> 00:30:45,960 Speaker 1: always okay and always encouraged by me. So I hope 570 00:30:45,960 --> 00:30:48,680 Speaker 1: that this year you get to, like I said earlier, 571 00:30:48,960 --> 00:30:53,800 Speaker 1: really enjoy this time where we get to celebrate each 572 00:30:53,840 --> 00:30:57,560 Speaker 1: other and celebrate our relationships and we allow energy to 573 00:30:57,560 --> 00:31:02,920 Speaker 1: spend more on celebrating then making sure we're celebrating exactly 574 00:31:02,960 --> 00:31:08,360 Speaker 1: perfectly right and getting the exact perfect impression or feedback 575 00:31:08,480 --> 00:31:11,000 Speaker 1: or reaction that might get in the way of the 576 00:31:11,040 --> 00:31:14,040 Speaker 1: actual experience that is going to do it for me. 577 00:31:14,240 --> 00:31:17,400 Speaker 1: And before I sign off, I said this last week, 578 00:31:17,440 --> 00:31:19,520 Speaker 1: I'm going to say it again because in the spirit 579 00:31:19,560 --> 00:31:21,760 Speaker 1: of giving, if you would like to gift me something 580 00:31:22,120 --> 00:31:25,440 Speaker 1: that costs you zero dollars but maybe thirty seconds to 581 00:31:25,520 --> 00:31:28,640 Speaker 1: a minute of your time, I would love, love, love, love, love, 582 00:31:28,640 --> 00:31:31,680 Speaker 1: love love love for my birthday for you guys to 583 00:31:32,000 --> 00:31:34,160 Speaker 1: rate and review the podcast. If you have not done 584 00:31:34,200 --> 00:31:36,719 Speaker 1: so yet, you can do that on Spotify. You can 585 00:31:36,760 --> 00:31:38,520 Speaker 1: do that on Apple. If you do it on Apple, 586 00:31:38,520 --> 00:31:40,920 Speaker 1: I would really love if you wrote a little note 587 00:31:40,920 --> 00:31:43,560 Speaker 1: that just shares with me and the people that might 588 00:31:43,600 --> 00:31:47,640 Speaker 1: be checking this podcast out what resonates with you, because 589 00:31:47,800 --> 00:31:52,880 Speaker 1: that oftentimes is helpful because it shows me what I 590 00:31:53,040 --> 00:31:57,160 Speaker 1: should continue to do and also might speak to somebody 591 00:31:57,160 --> 00:32:00,720 Speaker 1: who's contemplating listening, so they might get to actually hears 592 00:32:00,760 --> 00:32:04,560 Speaker 1: something that is meaningful for them. So I always encourage that, 593 00:32:04,880 --> 00:32:07,040 Speaker 1: especially on my birthday. I would love for that to happen. 594 00:32:07,560 --> 00:32:09,280 Speaker 1: If you guys want to send me a note or 595 00:32:09,280 --> 00:32:11,840 Speaker 1: a question for couch Talks, the episode where I answer 596 00:32:11,880 --> 00:32:14,720 Speaker 1: your questions, you can send that to Katherine at You 597 00:32:14,800 --> 00:32:18,000 Speaker 1: Need Therapy podcast dot com and if you want to 598 00:32:18,040 --> 00:32:21,520 Speaker 1: follow us at cat dot Defada at you Need Therapy Podcast, 599 00:32:21,640 --> 00:32:24,080 Speaker 1: and at three Quarts Therapy if you want to follow 600 00:32:24,200 --> 00:32:27,600 Speaker 1: my therapy practice. So now I'm going to go enjoy 601 00:32:27,680 --> 00:32:29,760 Speaker 1: my birthday and I will be back with you guys 602 00:32:29,760 --> 00:32:31,400 Speaker 1: on Wednesday for couch Talks