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Speaker 1: This is John, This is helmed the m Okay Storytime

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Speaker 1: podcast hosts, and.

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Speaker 2: We have some.

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Speaker 1: Good story is coming up for you.

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Speaker 2: That's right, but before that, we have a little more

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Speaker 2: sol of a two minute outbreak from the sponsors keeping

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Speaker 2: the show delicious.

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Speaker 1: H Strange things started happening after I trusted someone I shouldn't.

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Speaker 3: Don't trust them, and Sophia, it's I'm Not Afraid of

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Speaker 3: a Scary Story Week on Okay Storytime podcast, where we're

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Speaker 3: uncovering the most bone chilling encounters with weird neighbors and

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Speaker 3: obsessive stalkers, Tales.

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Speaker 1: That will have you wondering if that friendly face next

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Speaker 1: door is hiding something. If you're new here and looking

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Speaker 1: for the story, I live below a cult leader and

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Speaker 1: I fear I've angered her, just click the link in

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Speaker 1: the show notes or description or search I'm Not Afraid

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Speaker 1: of a Scary Story Week on Okay Storytime wherever you

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Speaker 1: get your podcast. Let's dive into this one. Here's a

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Speaker 1: list of strange things that have been happening to me

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Speaker 1: over the core of the last six months. The first

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Speaker 1: thing that happened to me was a message received from

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Speaker 1: a family member, or so I thought, who I got

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Speaker 1: a message through Facebook from a great aunt. I don't

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Speaker 1: talk to her often, but she is pretty close with

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Speaker 1: other members of my family that I'm close to, so

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Speaker 1: I wasn't surprised that she would reach out. I recently

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Speaker 1: graduated college, so she asked me what I was up

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Speaker 1: to now, questions about my job, where I live, my boyfriend,

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Speaker 1: et cetera. By the way, this comes from you user

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Speaker 1: ab zee one eight three three, and if you want

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Speaker 1: to submit your own stories, go to the rt slash

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Speaker 1: Okay storytime suburn it.

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Speaker 2: I'm Dakota, I'm Sophia, I'm Carly.

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Speaker 1: And op says. I answered all of her questions as

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Speaker 1: detailed as I could and tried having a good conversation

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Speaker 1: with her. I gave like a brief area of where

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Speaker 1: I live within my city, but obviously didn't give her

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Speaker 1: my address. I talked to her for a few days

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Speaker 1: while she continued to ask about my personal life. Then,

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Speaker 1: out of the blue, I try sending a message to her,

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Speaker 1: but the messenger app won't let it go through. I

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Speaker 1: assumed maybe she deleted her account because it got hacked,

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Speaker 1: or she decided to stop using social media. I saw

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Speaker 1: this already happen once with my uncle's account. I talked

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Speaker 1: it up to just that and moved on. Then a

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Speaker 1: couple months later, I'm scrolling through my messages and I

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Speaker 1: see those old messages like they are faded through, like

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Speaker 1: Facebook showing the account is no longer around. I figured

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Speaker 1: I wouldn't need them anymore, so I just deleted them.

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Speaker 1: This is when I stumbled on another account with the

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Speaker 1: same great aunt's name. You got scammed, buddy, scam, you

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Speaker 1: got scamed.

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Speaker 2: Scamme alerts.

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Speaker 1: You know what your great aunt sounds like?

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Speaker 4: Yeah?

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Speaker 2: I guess not.

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Speaker 1: Oh, and what is your social Security number? And what

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Speaker 1: are some other identifying traits about?

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Speaker 2: What remind me? What was my daughter's maiden name?

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Speaker 1: Yeah?

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Speaker 2: What is my last name? Please tell me?

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Speaker 1: I got confused and wondered if maybe she made a

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Speaker 1: new account.

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Speaker 2: Oh boy.

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Speaker 1: But then I look at the messages and realized she

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Speaker 1: had sent me a happy birthday message a month before

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Speaker 1: the other account messaged me asking about my life. I

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Speaker 1: realized there are two different accounts in her name. I

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Speaker 1: clicked on the happy birthday message and it brought up

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Speaker 1: her account. There are pictures on there from over ten

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Speaker 1: years ago. I messaged her and she told me that

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Speaker 1: she has always had that account and has never used

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Speaker 1: another one.

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Speaker 2: It's hacked.

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Speaker 1: You got hacked.

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Speaker 2: He got phished, yees, saying she didn't use that other one.

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Speaker 2: But folks got no, you were just scammed.

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Speaker 1: We need basic Internet literacy. Okay, it's always it pays.

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Speaker 1: It pays extra interest to do just the tiniest little

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Speaker 1: bit of leg work, a little bit, just a little bit.

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Speaker 1: When estranged relatives start reaching out to you, it's time

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Speaker 1: to make sure they're really your relatives. So I had

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Speaker 1: told a bunch of personal details about my life to

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Speaker 1: a fake account that was using her name. Oh boy,

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Speaker 1: Even if it was a simple case of fraud, like

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Speaker 1: they wanted to rip off my credit cards or something,

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Speaker 1: then why did they not ask any questions or even

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Speaker 1: hint at something like that? All they wanted to know

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Speaker 1: was personal details about my life. Fast forward a couple

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Speaker 1: months later, and I decided to rent a garage from

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Speaker 1: my landlord, which is next to my apartment building. I know,

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Speaker 1: it's stupid that we have to rent a garage stall

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Speaker 1: separate from renting our apartment. I start parking my car

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Speaker 1: in it, and a few days after I start using it,

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Speaker 1: I wake up one morning to find my garage door

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Speaker 1: is open. For about the next month, I wake up,

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Speaker 1: get ready and go down to my garage and the

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Speaker 1: door is wide open. This happens about once a week

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Speaker 1: for a month. It's random days, and usually in the

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Speaker 1: middle of the night it happens, so I don't notice

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Speaker 1: it until I walk down in the morning. I also

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Speaker 1: want to add that I haven't accidentally hit a button.

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Speaker 1: And after this started happening, every time I closed my

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Speaker 1: garage door, I watched it go down to make sure

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Speaker 1: it's stayed down.

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Speaker 2: Are you kidding, dude?

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Speaker 1: So what's breaking into your garage? Once a week and

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Speaker 1: you're like, here, I don't know what's happening.

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Speaker 2: I don't know what's going on.

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Speaker 1: I know the bus should not be impressed.

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Speaker 2: It's happening in the middle of night. Let's go call

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Speaker 2: someone about this. Let's go fix your garage. I don't know,

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Speaker 2: do something come on.

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Speaker 1: I've ruled out most logical explanations. The third time I

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Speaker 1: found my garage door open, I realized that the light

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Speaker 1: on my rear view mirror inside of my car was on,

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Speaker 1: like someone had turned it on and went through my car.

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Speaker 1: I have no sympathy for you.

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Speaker 2: You're big touchill.

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Speaker 1: I have no sympathy for you at this point, big

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Speaker 1: touchill insane. The whole month this was happening, I never

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Speaker 1: once found anything missing from my car or my garage.

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Speaker 1: It hasn't happened now for two weeks. My boyfriend at

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Speaker 1: one point lost his keys. About three weeks ago, he

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Speaker 1: was getting ready for work and realized his keys were gone.

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Speaker 1: He ended up walking to work and had to leave

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Speaker 1: our apartment door unlocked because he didn't have a key

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Speaker 1: to lock up and I was already at work. When

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Speaker 1: we got home that night, I made sure we looked

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Speaker 1: all over the apartment to make sure nothing was missing,

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Speaker 1: and also for his keys. Everything seemed fine. My boyfriend

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Speaker 1: had found his keys in the garage after looking a

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Speaker 1: little bit longer. I don't know how they could have

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Speaker 1: gotten there, but they did. After watching TV for a

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Speaker 1: few hours that night, I realized we hadn't checked the balcony.

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Speaker 1: I went to check the balcony door. Couldn't see the

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Speaker 1: lock on the door at first, because our screen door

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Speaker 1: is in front of the sliding glass door, the closest

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Speaker 1: to the inside of our apartment. So I slide open

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Speaker 1: the screen door, which doesn't lock and noticed right away

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Speaker 1: that the lock is unlatched on the sliding glass door.

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Speaker 1: I slid the door open a crack and peeked on

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Speaker 1: the balcony because I got nervous. I couldn't see anything,

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Speaker 1: so I closed the door and locked it.

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Speaker 2: Oh pee, there's someone in there. Someone's in there. Someone's

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Speaker 2: breaking in your house. Opee, let's call someone, ring ring ring.

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Speaker 2: Someone's breaking in my house.

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Speaker 1: It is probably the definition of like, you are too chill.

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Speaker 1: You're too chill for being way too not. You're taking

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Speaker 1: no action about this, and it's not okay.

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Speaker 2: Let's get some shalants up in here.

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Speaker 1: You need to get schalanted immediately, immin. I just want

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Speaker 1: to mention that my boyfriend and I have a rule

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Speaker 1: to always lock that door. I have never left it

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Speaker 1: open unless it was in the summertime.

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Speaker 2: I believe you right, someone's breaking in your house.

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Speaker 1: You need to like beat cameras. You need to be armed,

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Speaker 1: you need to be protected. You need something because someone's

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Speaker 1: trying to actively break into your house and to do something.

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Speaker 1: I don't know. Check your car's like a tracker on

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Speaker 1: it or something. I don't know what's happening, but there's

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Speaker 1: someone's up to no good. I also want to mention

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Speaker 1: that it is winter now and we probably haven't opened

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Speaker 1: that door in a couple months. I know I didn't

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Speaker 1: leave it unlocked. I know these things could all be

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Speaker 1: a coincidence, but it is just odd to me. It

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Speaker 1: makes me feel uneasy. I don't know if anyone has

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Speaker 1: had similar experiences. I've read a lot about stalking situations

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Speaker 1: and learned about stalking in general while in school, so

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Speaker 1: I know that victims oftentimes know their stalker, but I

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Speaker 1: honestly can't pinpoint a particular person, which is why I'm

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Speaker 1: not sure what to think about this situation. If you

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Speaker 1: made it through this story and have any advice at all,

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Speaker 1: I'd be so appreciative, even if you think it's nothing.

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Speaker 1: I just don't know what to think. I'm currently writing

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Speaker 1: this to see if any of you can help me

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Speaker 1: determine if I'm being stalked. Sometimes I think I might

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Speaker 1: be overreacting. Sometimes I think these things could all be

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Speaker 1: a coincidence, but I still feel uneasy about it. I'm

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Speaker 1: hoping if I post this on here that someone might

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Speaker 1: be able to give me an explanation, or maybe someone

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Speaker 1: has gone through similar circumstances and can offer advice. I

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Speaker 1: couldn't really find much about a situation where the stalker

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Speaker 1: wasn't known, and there are comments Comment one. One thing

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Speaker 1: that I've learned and is always trust your gut. If

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Speaker 1: it's saying you're possibly being stalked, prepare instead of being

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Speaker 1: sorry for it later. A camera would be a good

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Speaker 1: first steps, along with getting the locks changed. Yes, comment too,

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Speaker 1: those things sound suspicious. I would also add to your

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Speaker 1: patio sliding door a long block of wood put in

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Speaker 1: the sliding side so when it's shut and someone tries

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Speaker 1: to move the door, it won't slide. That way, you

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Speaker 1: don't have to rely on just a little metal lock.

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Speaker 1: And I would ask your landlord if he gave out

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Speaker 1: the same key to previous renters of that garage. If

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Speaker 1: he says yes, then ask if he can change the lock,

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Speaker 1: because there could also be a previous renter using the

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Speaker 1: same key. Also ask if he went into your garage

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Speaker 1: or apartment. Comment three says a dozen thoughts for you.

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Speaker 1: Op set your social media to private, change your passwords

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Speaker 1: for everything. If someone has been in your apartment, they

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Speaker 1: may have been on your computer. Ask your landlord to

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Speaker 1: rekey your door. Lock. Those missing house keys may have

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Speaker 1: been duplicated. Reset the garage door code. Always lock your

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Speaker 1: car even when you part work in the garage. Set

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Speaker 1: up surveillance in your garage with a hidden camera inside

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Speaker 1: the unit. Place a bar on that patio door so

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Speaker 1: it stays shut. Consider setting up a surveillance cam inside

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Speaker 1: your apartment. Break up your routine. You do not want

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Speaker 1: to be predictable. Tell your neighbor's, landlord, family, friends, and

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Speaker 1: coworkers to be on the lookout for strange activity and

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Speaker 1: unknown people. Also find out if anyone has been asking

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Speaker 1: questions about you. Keep your head up and your eyes open.

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Speaker 1: Notice who is around you at all the time, wherever

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Speaker 1: you are. If you do have a stalker, it may

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Speaker 1: or may not be a stranger, but it's definitely somebody

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Speaker 1: with a creepy side. Remain open to the possibility that

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Speaker 1: this could be someone that you've had contact with past

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Speaker 1: or present. Trust your gut. If someone or something feels off,

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Speaker 1: leave immediately.

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Speaker 2: Thank Gosh for this commenter who knows what to do.

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Speaker 1: Yes, thanks for saying all the things this person should do.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, Op, you listen to that commentary. That's all my advice.

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Speaker 2: Listen to that commentary, get cameras.

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Speaker 1: Get cameras yesterday, change your locks.

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Speaker 2: Today, yesterday, all of that, all of that everything.

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Speaker 1: There's an edit here. This is kind of an update

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Speaker 1: from the past week. Another thing has happened that I

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Speaker 1: need to mention. None of the other things seemed to

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Speaker 1: have continued on. I completed some of the security measures

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Speaker 1: you guys mentioned, and I appreciate you all so much.

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Speaker 1: But yesterday I was dog sitting alone at my mom's

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Speaker 1: house and I got a phone call. I looked down

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Speaker 1: at the phone and it said no caller ID. Oh no.

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Speaker 1: I often get calls from random numbers, but not calls

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Speaker 1: like that. I usually never answer either, because it's usually telemarketers.

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Speaker 1: I got this bad feeling in my gut, but had

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Speaker 1: to know who it was, so I picked up. It

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Speaker 1: was a man on the other end, and at first

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Speaker 1: he was just breathing for a long time. But after

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Speaker 1: I had said alone a couple of times, he said,

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Speaker 1: Aloe back, but in this really quiet, creepy voice. It

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Speaker 1: was almost like he was surprised that I answered, yeah,

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Speaker 1: he probably is. He's doing like the creepy voice.

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Speaker 2: Like from the first scene with Drew barrymore. What's up

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Speaker 2: from scream.

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Speaker 4: Do you like scary?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, she's just like what huh huh?

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Speaker 2: Are you talking about it?

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Speaker 4: Yeah?

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Speaker 1: First it's like, oh wow, she hasn't hung up. You're

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Speaker 1: just like Hello.

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Speaker 2: Who didn't think I'd get this far?

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Speaker 1: I asked who was calling? And he started like creepily

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Speaker 1: chuckling and asked me, who are you? Like he was

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Speaker 1: mocking me. I asked again who it was, and that's

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Speaker 1: when he said something really creepy and disturbing to me,

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Speaker 1: And that's when I hung up. This is the only

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Speaker 1: phone call I've ever gotten like that. It just scared

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Speaker 1: me to think how he could have gotten my number.

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Speaker 1: But I just have a bad feeling that this could

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Speaker 1: be related to the other incidents.

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Speaker 2: What it is?

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Speaker 4: Oh, p oh, he's like that number, cell provider, It'll

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Speaker 4: show up. No colorities still show up.

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Speaker 1: Oh, get the number contact or cell provider. Get that

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Speaker 1: phone number. Our report to the police. Oh, pe, have

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Speaker 1: some common sense, For the love of God.

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Speaker 2: Please, my wife got pregnant while I was away for work.

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Speaker 4: Oh it could it be yours? Isn't anyway?

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Speaker 2: My wife two female and I twenty four male, have

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Speaker 2: been married for two years together for four I work

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Speaker 2: on a river barge, so I spend about a month

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Speaker 2: away from home at a time for work, followed by

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Speaker 2: two weeks off. I've been doing this for the last

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Speaker 2: years since I got laid off from my other job.

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Speaker 2: By the way this comes from literally sounds legit. And

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Speaker 2: if you want to submit your own stories, go to

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Speaker 2: the r slash Okay story time severed at I'm Sophia, I'm.

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Speaker 5: Carly, I'm Keon, and we're here to give good.

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Speaker 2: Advice goofully, But we don't have all the answers. We

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Speaker 2: only know what we do, so let us know what

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Speaker 2: you would do in the comments, and Op says, I

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Speaker 2: just got back from a job and found out that

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Speaker 2: my wife has been having an affair with an old

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Speaker 2: boyfriend that recently came back to town. Ouch. I asked

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Speaker 2: her how many times, and I wish I didn't. She

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Speaker 2: said she wasn't sure. You never want to hear that.

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Speaker 5: Yep, Nope, that's bad.

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Speaker 2: And that it had been a continual thing. They started

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Speaker 2: talking on Facebook a few months ago, but it had

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Speaker 2: only been innocent catching up until this last time I left.

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Speaker 2: This time, they agreed to meet up and had basically

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Speaker 2: been sleeping together all month. While I was away. She

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Speaker 2: said that she had planned to end it when I

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Speaker 2: got back and knew she had to come clean. You

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Speaker 2: let me look at her Facebook messages, inbox and text

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Speaker 2: messages for proof, and the messages were consistent with her

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Speaker 2: story and timeline. My initial reaction was that the marriage

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Speaker 2: was over. I felt betrayed, hurt, and didn't think I'd

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Speaker 2: ever be able to trust her again. I work my

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Speaker 2: butt off so that she doesn't have to work while

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Speaker 2: she's in school. I felt like being faithful was the

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Speaker 2: least she could do for me. She knew what marriage

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Speaker 2: meant to me long before we took our vows. Both

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Speaker 2: of us are Catholics. We aren't perfect Catholics by a

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Speaker 2: long shot, but were deeply religious. I stressed to her

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Speaker 2: that for me, marriage is a forever commitment in sickness

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Speaker 2: and in health, and till passing do us part means

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Speaker 2: something to me. I told her that I knew I

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Speaker 2: wanted to be with her for the rest of my life,

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Speaker 2: but only if she could promise me that she wanted

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Speaker 2: the same thing. I stayed at a friend's place for

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Speaker 2: a few days and thought it over. First, I talked

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Speaker 2: to our priests. He reminded me what I signed up

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Speaker 2: for and believed in. I don't like that she cheated

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Speaker 2: on him. Yeah, I just don't think about it. I

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Speaker 2: don't think about it. You signed up for insickness and

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Speaker 2: in health. He didn't sign up to be cheated on.

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Speaker 4: Cheating and in.

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Speaker 2: Literally one of the commandments adultery no, no, big bad.

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Speaker 4: It's a big no no.

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Speaker 2: Marriage is a forever commitment, and that means being able

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Speaker 2: to forgive and work past problems. She's been cheating for.

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Speaker 4: So long that she doesn't remember how many times.

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Speaker 2: This is terrible advice.

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Speaker 5: Get a new priest, get a new wife.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, wife, and a new priest.

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Speaker 2: He recommended that for now I find work close to

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Speaker 2: home so I can be with my wife and keep

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Speaker 2: an eye on her. What kind of ad ice is this?

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Speaker 2: And that we seek marriage counseling, either through the church

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Speaker 2: or with the therapist.

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Speaker 5: Did he cheat with the priest?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, you say, I.

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Speaker 4: Think you should just stay with her.

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Speaker 2: I also talked to some of the older guys I

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Speaker 2: work with, and it gave me some perspective. A lot

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00:15:07,040 --> 00:15:09,280
Speaker 2: of them have gone through the same thing. Some of

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Speaker 2: their marriages survived, and a lot of them didn't. But

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00:15:12,440 --> 00:15:15,280
Speaker 2: all of them agree that spending long periods away from

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Speaker 2: home at times can be rough on any marriage, but

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Speaker 2: especially tough for young marriages. I understand that feeling constantly

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00:15:22,840 --> 00:15:25,640
Speaker 2: lonely and being by yourself in an empty house is hard.

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Speaker 2: We talked and she assured me that she loved me.

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Speaker 2: She promised me that the affair meant nothing to her,

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Speaker 2: that she just felt alone, and that she would cut

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Speaker 2: off all contact with the guy. She understood that she

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Speaker 2: would have to work to earn my trust back. Agreed

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Speaker 2: to give me access to her Facebook and to check

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Speaker 2: her phone randomly until I can trust her again. She

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Speaker 2: also agreed to go to marriage counseling. On my end,

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Speaker 2: I have agreed to find a local job so that

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Speaker 2: I can be with her and focus on our marriage.

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Speaker 2: We aren't having spicy sleep right now, and haven't since

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Speaker 2: she came clean to me. I wanted to take it

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Speaker 2: slow getting intimate again, and she respected that. We've been kissing, cuddling,

359
00:16:01,760 --> 00:16:04,320
Speaker 2: and sleeping in the same bed more recently, she has

360
00:16:04,360 --> 00:16:08,400
Speaker 2: been insisting on giving me other spicy stuff, which I'm

361
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Speaker 2: okay with. She says she just wants to know that

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Speaker 2: I still want her and that she wants to please me.

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00:16:14,240 --> 00:16:16,760
Speaker 2: I do want her, and I appreciate her efforts to

364
00:16:16,800 --> 00:16:22,400
Speaker 2: say okay, oh boy, still no spicy sleep though it's

365
00:16:22,440 --> 00:16:24,680
Speaker 2: not her, it's me, it's not you.

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Speaker 4: She cheated on you, it's you because of what she did.

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Speaker 4: She cheated on you makes total sense.

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Speaker 2: I still find her attractive, but I think it's going

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00:16:35,000 --> 00:16:37,120
Speaker 2: to take at least a little while before I feel

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00:16:37,200 --> 00:16:39,720
Speaker 2: like having spicy sleep with her again. I guess I

371
00:16:39,760 --> 00:16:42,160
Speaker 2: still feel grossed out by the prospect of it, like

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Speaker 2: she's unclean or something. She understands how I feel and

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Speaker 2: is okay with it. She offered to let me cheat

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00:16:48,160 --> 00:16:50,840
Speaker 2: on her to get even Why is that always the

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Speaker 2: cheaters thing?

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Speaker 4: Why is that what we go to.

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00:16:53,440 --> 00:16:55,840
Speaker 2: Yeah, they're like, oh, you can cheat on me. I

378
00:16:55,920 --> 00:16:58,640
Speaker 2: don't want you to cheat on me. I don't want

379
00:16:58,640 --> 00:16:59,400
Speaker 2: to cheat on you.

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00:17:00,200 --> 00:17:02,800
Speaker 4: That's two wrongs. Is not making right here?

381
00:17:03,440 --> 00:17:07,520
Speaker 2: Or get some physical release you? But I declined, I

382
00:17:07,560 --> 00:17:10,040
Speaker 2: don't want to screw somebody else. I want to be

383
00:17:10,119 --> 00:17:12,399
Speaker 2: with my wife and I just want things to go

384
00:17:12,480 --> 00:17:16,240
Speaker 2: back to normal. Two weeks later, we find out she's pregnant.

385
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Speaker 4: A ah, I don't know if y'all can get through this.

386
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Speaker 2: Gonna be honest.

387
00:17:23,400 --> 00:17:25,040
Speaker 4: What's your priest gotta say?

388
00:17:25,080 --> 00:17:28,520
Speaker 2: Now? Yeah, the priest is like, well, you gotta get

389
00:17:28,800 --> 00:17:33,320
Speaker 2: so if you have a baby together. If Joe, He's

390
00:17:33,359 --> 00:17:37,240
Speaker 2: like trying to do the math. You're both the father,

391
00:17:37,960 --> 00:17:41,440
Speaker 2: you both marry. I don't that's another religion, Dan, Yeah,

392
00:17:41,720 --> 00:17:44,720
Speaker 2: obviously the other guy is the father. I'm the only

393
00:17:44,760 --> 00:17:48,359
Speaker 2: person she's told so far being religious. Not continuing the

394
00:17:48,359 --> 00:17:50,720
Speaker 2: pregnancy was off the table for us from the start.

395
00:17:51,200 --> 00:17:52,840
Speaker 2: I told her that I want her to put the

396
00:17:52,880 --> 00:17:55,399
Speaker 2: baby up for adoption. I'm willing to forgive her and

397
00:17:55,520 --> 00:17:58,760
Speaker 2: repair our marriage, and I can look past an awful lot.

398
00:17:59,119 --> 00:18:00,800
Speaker 2: When I know that I cannot do is go through

399
00:18:00,840 --> 00:18:04,000
Speaker 2: every day looking at a reminder of her infidelity and

400
00:18:04,080 --> 00:18:07,920
Speaker 2: having this other guy intertwined in our lives in some capacity.

401
00:18:08,520 --> 00:18:10,720
Speaker 2: I can't do it. I know that probably makes me

402
00:18:10,760 --> 00:18:14,679
Speaker 2: a poor Christian. Give yourself a break, my guy, But

403
00:18:14,800 --> 00:18:17,399
Speaker 2: I've got to believe that God understands that I'm not

404
00:18:17,520 --> 00:18:21,760
Speaker 2: perfect and forgives me. Yeah, she wants to keep the baby.

405
00:18:21,880 --> 00:18:23,760
Speaker 2: Who says that the other guy never asked to know

406
00:18:23,800 --> 00:18:27,119
Speaker 2: about it. Yikes, you're what We've gotta tell that guy?

407
00:18:27,320 --> 00:18:30,600
Speaker 2: Come on, and that she understands that our marriage cannot

408
00:18:30,600 --> 00:18:33,679
Speaker 2: survive with him in our lives, but her opinion is

409
00:18:33,720 --> 00:18:36,760
Speaker 2: that it isn't the baby's fault. The baby didn't ask

410
00:18:36,840 --> 00:18:39,919
Speaker 2: to be born out of an adulterous relationship, and that

411
00:18:39,960 --> 00:18:43,040
Speaker 2: we would be unnecessarily causing the baby to suffer by

412
00:18:43,040 --> 00:18:45,280
Speaker 2: putting it up for adoption. She also said that the

413
00:18:45,280 --> 00:18:46,879
Speaker 2: baby is a part of her and that she would

414
00:18:46,920 --> 00:18:49,280
Speaker 2: like me to be able to love and accept the

415
00:18:49,400 --> 00:18:52,120
Speaker 2: child as a part of her instead of the other man.

416
00:18:52,520 --> 00:18:54,800
Speaker 2: I understand where she is coming from, and I get

417
00:18:54,840 --> 00:18:56,720
Speaker 2: that it would have to be terrible to carry a

418
00:18:56,720 --> 00:18:59,720
Speaker 2: baby and have it grow inside of you for nine months,

419
00:18:59,760 --> 00:19:01,480
Speaker 2: knowing that you've got to give it away as soon

420
00:19:01,520 --> 00:19:04,200
Speaker 2: as it's born. But I can't do it. I really

421
00:19:04,240 --> 00:19:06,600
Speaker 2: don't know what else to say. She has agreed to

422
00:19:06,640 --> 00:19:08,560
Speaker 2: go talk to our priest about it with me, but

423
00:19:08,720 --> 00:19:11,480
Speaker 2: regardless of what he says, I can't see either of

424
00:19:11,560 --> 00:19:14,320
Speaker 2: us budging on it. My marriage might be over, and

425
00:19:14,400 --> 00:19:17,360
Speaker 2: all I feel like doing is drinking until I pass out.

426
00:19:17,600 --> 00:19:19,800
Speaker 2: I barely think about it. But we haven't even talked

427
00:19:19,800 --> 00:19:23,679
Speaker 2: to our families about the infidelity yet, let alone the pregnancy.

428
00:19:24,320 --> 00:19:27,200
Speaker 2: The whole thing is embarrassing, and I don't want the attention.

429
00:19:27,680 --> 00:19:29,920
Speaker 2: I don't want people telling me that we're in their

430
00:19:30,000 --> 00:19:33,080
Speaker 2: prayers but judging our marriage and guessing how each of

431
00:19:33,160 --> 00:19:35,359
Speaker 2: us failed. I just want it all to go away.

432
00:19:35,720 --> 00:19:38,520
Speaker 2: Thank you for reading this. If anyone else has gone

433
00:19:38,520 --> 00:19:40,840
Speaker 2: through something like this and has had their marriage survive,

434
00:19:41,000 --> 00:19:43,320
Speaker 2: I'd love to hear from you. I could use some

435
00:19:43,400 --> 00:19:45,960
Speaker 2: optimism about now, and there isn't edit.

436
00:19:46,320 --> 00:19:49,760
Speaker 4: But what do you think your wife sucks?

437
00:19:50,080 --> 00:19:53,920
Speaker 2: Yeah? I think honestly, I understand that you want to

438
00:19:54,000 --> 00:19:56,720
Speaker 2: keep this, you know, marriage together because of your faith

439
00:19:57,040 --> 00:20:00,200
Speaker 2: for sure. However, I do just want to point out

440
00:20:00,240 --> 00:20:05,280
Speaker 2: something you clearly cannot get over this right now at least. Yeah,

441
00:20:05,560 --> 00:20:08,800
Speaker 2: seems like this is really rightly so affecting you. You

442
00:20:08,800 --> 00:20:12,280
Speaker 2: can't even you know, have any like physical stuff going

443
00:20:12,280 --> 00:20:15,080
Speaker 2: on with your wife because of what she did. She

444
00:20:15,400 --> 00:20:18,639
Speaker 2: wants to keep the baby, which I think personally she

445
00:20:18,680 --> 00:20:21,119
Speaker 2: has a right to. Of course, she's carrying this baby,

446
00:20:21,119 --> 00:20:22,560
Speaker 2: it's her kid. She has a right to want to

447
00:20:22,600 --> 00:20:26,640
Speaker 2: keep it. You don't, and I feel like that those

448
00:20:26,680 --> 00:20:29,639
Speaker 2: are at odds, And if you don't she does.

449
00:20:29,720 --> 00:20:32,639
Speaker 4: Then maybe I don't think you need to be raising

450
00:20:32,680 --> 00:20:33,440
Speaker 4: this baby. With her.

451
00:20:33,560 --> 00:20:36,600
Speaker 2: I agree, I agree. There's yeah, you have no obligation

452
00:20:36,760 --> 00:20:37,439
Speaker 2: to this baby.

453
00:20:38,000 --> 00:20:40,800
Speaker 4: The other dude does. The other she does, and so

454
00:20:40,880 --> 00:20:43,480
Speaker 4: does she, and the other dude deserves to know that

455
00:20:43,560 --> 00:20:45,000
Speaker 4: it's his baby.

456
00:20:44,760 --> 00:20:48,280
Speaker 2: Big time, big time. Yeah. So I feel like at

457
00:20:48,280 --> 00:20:52,560
Speaker 2: this point maybe marriage is not strong enough to survive this.

458
00:20:52,680 --> 00:20:55,600
Speaker 2: But there is an edit. Thank you to everyone for

459
00:20:55,680 --> 00:20:57,800
Speaker 2: your replies. I'm going to go ahead and see if

460
00:20:57,800 --> 00:20:59,760
Speaker 2: I can meet with an attorney tomorrow and find out

461
00:20:59,760 --> 00:21:01,640
Speaker 2: what I need to do to ensure that I won't

462
00:21:01,640 --> 00:21:05,080
Speaker 2: be financially responsible for the child. I expect that she

463
00:21:05,119 --> 00:21:07,640
Speaker 2: will probably be angry and see this as some sort

464
00:21:07,640 --> 00:21:10,480
Speaker 2: of power move to force her into adoption. It's clear

465
00:21:10,520 --> 00:21:12,480
Speaker 2: to me that I could not be happy raising another

466
00:21:12,520 --> 00:21:15,960
Speaker 2: man's child. It's just too much to ask. I plan

467
00:21:16,040 --> 00:21:17,639
Speaker 2: to talk to her and tell her that while I

468
00:21:17,720 --> 00:21:20,959
Speaker 2: forgive her for the adultery itself, the marriage is doomed.

469
00:21:21,320 --> 00:21:23,159
Speaker 2: We're at an impasse where one of us has to

470
00:21:23,240 --> 00:21:26,480
Speaker 2: lose in order for the other one to win. There

471
00:21:26,600 --> 00:21:29,640
Speaker 2: is no half baby. It's all in or all out,

472
00:21:29,680 --> 00:21:32,400
Speaker 2: which I think is true. Yeah. Moreover, it isn't fair

473
00:21:32,440 --> 00:21:34,560
Speaker 2: to deny the father's child the chance to know he's

474
00:21:34,560 --> 00:21:37,200
Speaker 2: a father, or the child a chance to know who

475
00:21:37,280 --> 00:21:40,720
Speaker 2: his father is. I don't personally fault him for what happened.

476
00:21:41,080 --> 00:21:43,840
Speaker 2: I don't know him, he doesn't know me. I question

477
00:21:44,000 --> 00:21:46,359
Speaker 2: his morals in sleeping with the married woman, but it

478
00:21:46,400 --> 00:21:49,119
Speaker 2: isn't as if he had any duty or pledged loyalty

479
00:21:49,200 --> 00:21:51,840
Speaker 2: to me. It's my wife I should be angry with.

480
00:21:51,960 --> 00:21:55,400
Speaker 2: If anything, I can't even manage that. I just want

481
00:21:55,440 --> 00:21:58,000
Speaker 2: to get this over with and move forward. Thanks again,

482
00:21:58,160 --> 00:22:01,359
Speaker 2: everyone I guess I'm looking for. And there is an

483
00:22:01,440 --> 00:22:04,360
Speaker 2: update truthfully. Yep, he's taking this really well.

484
00:22:04,440 --> 00:22:05,800
Speaker 4: He's taking it really well.

485
00:22:05,880 --> 00:22:07,440
Speaker 2: Yeah, he's like, I'm not going to be married to

486
00:22:07,480 --> 00:22:08,400
Speaker 2: this guy. I don't know him.

487
00:22:08,640 --> 00:22:10,679
Speaker 4: Yeah, and he seems like he's on the right track

488
00:22:10,720 --> 00:22:12,040
Speaker 4: and kind of said everything you said.

489
00:22:12,119 --> 00:22:14,720
Speaker 2: Mm hmm. I think you're doing great, dude, and it's

490
00:22:14,720 --> 00:22:19,040
Speaker 2: a really terrible situation. But I think that don't listen

491
00:22:19,160 --> 00:22:24,560
Speaker 2: to your priest's advice about staying in this marriage. Like you,

492
00:22:24,600 --> 00:22:28,000
Speaker 2: guys made a promise and she broke that promise. Therefore

493
00:22:28,560 --> 00:22:30,640
Speaker 2: you are no longer held to that promise.

494
00:22:31,000 --> 00:22:31,400
Speaker 1: Update.

495
00:22:31,960 --> 00:22:34,520
Speaker 2: I've spoken to a good friend and attorney about it

496
00:22:34,640 --> 00:22:37,080
Speaker 2: this morning and he has offered to represent me and

497
00:22:37,119 --> 00:22:41,280
Speaker 2: work with me on cost I'm deciding to move forward

498
00:22:41,359 --> 00:22:44,919
Speaker 2: with initiating divorce. As I've said, I have forgiven her

499
00:22:44,960 --> 00:22:47,800
Speaker 2: for what she did, but I've also realized that forgiveness

500
00:22:47,840 --> 00:22:50,000
Speaker 2: doesn't mean that it would be healthy for either of

501
00:22:50,040 --> 00:22:53,040
Speaker 2: us to remain in the marriage. I can't raise this child.

502
00:22:53,320 --> 00:22:55,639
Speaker 2: I don't blame the child, but I know that I

503
00:22:55,680 --> 00:22:57,960
Speaker 2: would resent it every day. But there is a little

504
00:22:57,960 --> 00:23:00,000
Speaker 2: bit left to this story, any final.

505
00:23:01,280 --> 00:23:03,200
Speaker 4: I have no more thoughts. I think he's right on track.

506
00:23:03,600 --> 00:23:05,760
Speaker 4: Get a new priest agreed.

507
00:23:06,040 --> 00:23:09,560
Speaker 5: Opie seems like a genuinely good guy, and I think

508
00:23:09,560 --> 00:23:11,120
Speaker 5: he was. Even at the beginning of it, you could

509
00:23:11,119 --> 00:23:13,440
Speaker 5: tell he was just like he was taking a lot

510
00:23:13,480 --> 00:23:16,240
Speaker 5: of the brunt of like, no, I can't blame.

511
00:23:16,240 --> 00:23:18,159
Speaker 4: He took all the blame for something he didn't He

512
00:23:18,200 --> 00:23:18,919
Speaker 4: didn't do anything.

513
00:23:19,040 --> 00:23:21,080
Speaker 5: Yeah, literally, he was just a good husband.

514
00:23:21,359 --> 00:23:23,800
Speaker 2: Yeah, he was like, I'm sorry, I can't love you,

515
00:23:23,880 --> 00:23:25,919
Speaker 2: like as if it was his fault, as if he

516
00:23:25,960 --> 00:23:29,320
Speaker 2: did that. But OPI not your fault, not at all.

517
00:23:29,600 --> 00:23:31,639
Speaker 2: But there is a little bit left. Even if my

518
00:23:31,680 --> 00:23:34,680
Speaker 2: wife agreed to adoption, I know that she would resent

519
00:23:34,760 --> 00:23:37,199
Speaker 2: me for pressuring her to do it. The fact is

520
00:23:37,280 --> 00:23:40,239
Speaker 2: she has made her choice emotionally. We both know what

521
00:23:40,280 --> 00:23:42,760
Speaker 2: she wants the outcome to be, and the best thing

522
00:23:42,800 --> 00:23:44,400
Speaker 2: I can do for both of us in the long

523
00:23:44,520 --> 00:23:47,560
Speaker 2: term is to stick to my puput. If I'm able

524
00:23:47,600 --> 00:23:50,720
Speaker 2: to get an annulment through the church, fantastic. If not,

525
00:23:51,160 --> 00:23:53,520
Speaker 2: so be it. I've got a hard time believing that

526
00:23:53,560 --> 00:23:56,440
Speaker 2: God will not forgive me for this. Yeah, I think

527
00:23:56,480 --> 00:23:59,119
Speaker 2: you're all right. You're good for now. My attorney has

528
00:23:59,119 --> 00:24:01,840
Speaker 2: advised me not to tell my wife and instead collect

529
00:24:01,960 --> 00:24:04,840
Speaker 2: all evidence I have of the affair. First. I'd like

530
00:24:04,880 --> 00:24:07,840
Speaker 2: to believe that my wife wouldn't try to destroy the evidence,

531
00:24:08,160 --> 00:24:10,280
Speaker 2: but given what has happened and what is at stake,

532
00:24:10,440 --> 00:24:12,840
Speaker 2: I'm not going to take the chance. I'll speak to

533
00:24:12,880 --> 00:24:15,080
Speaker 2: her sometime this week and we'll ask her to leave,

534
00:24:15,440 --> 00:24:17,840
Speaker 2: and that is the end of that story. Folks. But

535
00:24:18,000 --> 00:24:20,000
Speaker 2: I think you are on the right track. O. Yeah.

536
00:24:20,480 --> 00:24:24,040
Speaker 4: Does the church like because I know nothing about this, Guys,

537
00:24:24,320 --> 00:24:27,080
Speaker 4: if he can prove cheating, will they like give him

538
00:24:27,080 --> 00:24:30,640
Speaker 4: an annulment instead of a divorce? Yeah?

539
00:24:30,680 --> 00:24:32,280
Speaker 2: In some cases you can do that.

540
00:24:32,440 --> 00:24:36,000
Speaker 4: Because it's like she broke the vows that she promised yeah.

541
00:24:35,560 --> 00:24:36,240
Speaker 2: That is an option.

542
00:24:36,280 --> 00:24:38,280
Speaker 4: It's not like every I just didn't know if that

543
00:24:38,359 --> 00:24:39,800
Speaker 4: was like a thing that happens sometimes.

544
00:24:39,880 --> 00:24:42,240
Speaker 2: I think that you can get an annuyment in depending

545
00:24:42,240 --> 00:24:43,520
Speaker 2: on the church that you belong to.

546
00:24:43,680 --> 00:24:44,879
Speaker 4: Maybe not with that priest.

547
00:24:45,359 --> 00:24:48,920
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, don't know about that priest. Red bull Rana says,

548
00:24:48,960 --> 00:24:51,520
Speaker 2: the baby is all the evidence you need, my guy.

549
00:24:51,640 --> 00:24:51,880
Speaker 4: True.

550
00:24:51,920 --> 00:24:55,879
Speaker 2: Yeah, literally, being like rude, do you have proof of unaffair?

551
00:24:56,520 --> 00:24:58,440
Speaker 2: You go, well, here's when.

552
00:24:58,240 --> 00:25:03,200
Speaker 4: We got married, here, here's the way work, here's the DNA,

553
00:25:04,040 --> 00:25:06,240
Speaker 4: and here's mine don't match.

554
00:25:06,560 --> 00:25:10,200
Speaker 2: I think that's pretty solid proof. But we've got another story,

555
00:25:10,240 --> 00:25:12,040
Speaker 2: folks who coming ride up.

556
00:25:12,480 --> 00:25:16,639
Speaker 4: I snitched on my mother's married boyfriend and lost everything.

557
00:25:17,160 --> 00:25:18,400
Speaker 2: That's their fault.

558
00:25:19,080 --> 00:25:22,960
Speaker 4: My mother started having an affair with a married man, Bruce,

559
00:25:23,320 --> 00:25:27,160
Speaker 4: over ten years ago. My dad left her over it,

560
00:25:27,200 --> 00:25:30,040
Speaker 4: but she stayed with Bruce with the promise of him

561
00:25:30,080 --> 00:25:35,160
Speaker 4: divorcing his wife soon. Spoiler alert, it never happened. By

562
00:25:35,200 --> 00:25:39,359
Speaker 4: the way, this comes from Throwaway My Life, And if

563
00:25:39,400 --> 00:25:41,040
Speaker 4: you want us to make your own stories, go to

564
00:25:41,040 --> 00:25:42,800
Speaker 4: the r slash Okay storytime subreddit.

565
00:25:42,960 --> 00:25:45,080
Speaker 2: I'm Carly, I'm Sophia.

566
00:25:44,760 --> 00:25:48,240
Speaker 6: And I and we're here to give good advice, Goofi ye,

567
00:25:48,400 --> 00:25:50,200
Speaker 6: but we don't have all the answers.

568
00:25:50,280 --> 00:25:53,000
Speaker 4: We only know what we do, So let us know

569
00:25:53,040 --> 00:25:55,760
Speaker 4: what you would do in the comments and Op says.

570
00:25:56,440 --> 00:25:59,600
Speaker 4: After ten plus years of knowing my mother was the

571
00:25:59,680 --> 00:26:04,520
Speaker 4: other woman, and after stalking Bruce's wife's socials, I couldn't

572
00:26:04,560 --> 00:26:08,360
Speaker 4: take it anymore. He's a creepy man that no one

573
00:26:08,359 --> 00:26:12,760
Speaker 4: in my family can stand, including my three other siblings.

574
00:26:13,040 --> 00:26:16,199
Speaker 4: We've been tasked all these years to keep her dirty

575
00:26:16,240 --> 00:26:19,600
Speaker 4: secret and treat Bruce as if he's not an adulterer.

576
00:26:19,640 --> 00:26:24,440
Speaker 4: That is insane. I took one for the team and

577
00:26:24,560 --> 00:26:27,960
Speaker 4: sent some anonymous emails out to some contacts I found

578
00:26:28,000 --> 00:26:32,720
Speaker 4: through social media. Bruce's wife responded to me and asked

579
00:26:32,760 --> 00:26:35,919
Speaker 4: to speak, as she had no idea any of this

580
00:26:36,080 --> 00:26:40,119
Speaker 4: was going on, which I highly suspected despite Bruce's lies

581
00:26:40,160 --> 00:26:43,560
Speaker 4: all these years. So I sat down and phoned her.

582
00:26:44,119 --> 00:26:47,440
Speaker 4: We talked for almost three hours. She's a nice woman

583
00:26:47,520 --> 00:26:50,240
Speaker 4: who was nothing but kind to me. She's been married

584
00:26:50,240 --> 00:26:54,439
Speaker 4: to Bruce for thirty years. OHO had no idea he

585
00:26:54,480 --> 00:26:58,200
Speaker 4: had a double life. His job allows him to travel frequently.

586
00:26:58,760 --> 00:27:02,320
Speaker 4: I answered all her questions during this conversation, though I

587
00:27:02,400 --> 00:27:05,280
Speaker 4: knew my relationship with my mother was over.

588
00:27:05,240 --> 00:27:08,240
Speaker 2: Which you know, that's not your fault. Your mother was

589
00:27:08,520 --> 00:27:11,600
Speaker 2: asking you to keep such a terrible secret of her

590
00:27:11,720 --> 00:27:16,040
Speaker 2: own wrongdoings ten years. That's not a good relationship anyway.

591
00:27:16,280 --> 00:27:18,680
Speaker 4: Yeah, I knew the details would get back to her

592
00:27:18,760 --> 00:27:22,480
Speaker 4: and would pinpoint to me. Bruce's wife thanked me over

593
00:27:22,600 --> 00:27:26,520
Speaker 4: and over and shared she would be divorcing Bruce once

594
00:27:26,560 --> 00:27:29,640
Speaker 4: she got her finances in order. It was a very

595
00:27:29,680 --> 00:27:33,080
Speaker 4: emotional conversation, and I'll never forget the sound of her

596
00:27:33,200 --> 00:27:35,560
Speaker 4: cries as I told her all the details.

597
00:27:35,840 --> 00:27:39,080
Speaker 2: That's just crazy. Ten years of cheating on your partner,

598
00:27:39,200 --> 00:27:41,000
Speaker 2: like you're a psychopath. Yeah.

599
00:27:41,080 --> 00:27:43,879
Speaker 4: The next day I was completely cut off from my mother.

600
00:27:44,080 --> 00:27:47,240
Speaker 4: I had no way of contacting her, and shortly after

601
00:27:47,320 --> 00:27:51,840
Speaker 4: that the intimidation from members of my family came, flooding

602
00:27:51,880 --> 00:27:56,520
Speaker 4: in messages of disgust towards me and support towards my mother.

603
00:27:57,119 --> 00:28:00,120
Speaker 4: Everyone turned on me and will no longer speak to me.

604
00:28:00,560 --> 00:28:02,720
Speaker 4: I can't imagine she's telling them the truth of what

605
00:28:02,800 --> 00:28:07,360
Speaker 4: I did. I told on her married boyfriend. I'm shocked

606
00:28:07,359 --> 00:28:10,960
Speaker 4: my family has chosen her side and abandoned me. Sometimes

607
00:28:11,040 --> 00:28:13,760
Speaker 4: regret washes over me but in the end, all I

608
00:28:13,800 --> 00:28:16,679
Speaker 4: did was speed up the inevitable, and I did it

609
00:28:16,680 --> 00:28:20,439
Speaker 4: for my siblings who couldn't stand his presence anymore. I

610
00:28:20,520 --> 00:28:23,080
Speaker 4: thought it would get rid of him, but it backfired.

611
00:28:23,560 --> 00:28:26,800
Speaker 4: Not only are Bruce and my mother getting married, but

612
00:28:26,840 --> 00:28:30,280
Speaker 4: my siblings chose her side and have cut me off.

613
00:28:30,560 --> 00:28:33,320
Speaker 4: This weighs heavy on my chest. It did for the

614
00:28:33,359 --> 00:28:36,720
Speaker 4: last ten years, and now because of what I did,

615
00:28:36,880 --> 00:28:39,960
Speaker 4: it will continue. Thanks for reading and letting me get

616
00:28:40,000 --> 00:28:42,960
Speaker 4: it out. And we haven't edit, but I mean, oh pee.

617
00:28:43,560 --> 00:28:47,040
Speaker 2: When you do something like that, there will be consequences. However,

618
00:28:47,040 --> 00:28:48,600
Speaker 2: that does not mean that you shouldn't.

619
00:28:48,240 --> 00:28:50,000
Speaker 4: Do it, and I think that there was a positive

620
00:28:50,040 --> 00:28:51,120
Speaker 4: consequence of his.

621
00:28:51,400 --> 00:28:55,320
Speaker 2: Wife wife wife probably really thanks you for really know that.

622
00:28:55,760 --> 00:28:58,920
Speaker 4: Yeah, So even though you lost a toxic relationship with

623
00:28:58,960 --> 00:29:01,240
Speaker 4: your mother, you say that other woman from.

624
00:29:01,200 --> 00:29:03,440
Speaker 2: Yeah, and you're gonna be around a lot better. You're

625
00:29:03,440 --> 00:29:06,240
Speaker 2: gonna find a lot better people. We're not gonna want

626
00:29:06,240 --> 00:29:08,640
Speaker 2: to keep secrets like this and force you to keep

627
00:29:08,680 --> 00:29:11,840
Speaker 2: those secrets and side with adult you know, cheaters.

628
00:29:12,160 --> 00:29:12,760
Speaker 4: Yeah.

629
00:29:13,000 --> 00:29:13,160
Speaker 2: Edit.

630
00:29:13,520 --> 00:29:16,240
Speaker 4: Thank you to all the supportive comments. I have a

631
00:29:16,240 --> 00:29:18,800
Speaker 4: few people in my corner rooting for me, but these

632
00:29:18,840 --> 00:29:22,640
Speaker 4: comments have been comforting and therapeutic. The number of family

633
00:29:22,680 --> 00:29:26,160
Speaker 4: that turned on me. I truly started to worry I

634
00:29:26,360 --> 00:29:29,680
Speaker 4: was the problem and made a mistake to answer some questions.

635
00:29:30,200 --> 00:29:32,960
Speaker 4: Money is a huge factor in all of this, which

636
00:29:33,000 --> 00:29:35,680
Speaker 4: is why my mother and siblings are so angry and

637
00:29:35,760 --> 00:29:40,000
Speaker 4: not thinking me. I am my mother's oldest daughter. Only

638
00:29:40,000 --> 00:29:43,360
Speaker 4: my youngest sibling lives with her. We are all adults.

639
00:29:43,760 --> 00:29:46,120
Speaker 4: I have two young children. My mother has thrown to

640
00:29:46,200 --> 00:29:49,480
Speaker 4: the curb for Bruce. They will never know who she is.

641
00:29:49,880 --> 00:29:52,440
Speaker 4: I am in contact with the wife. She is a

642
00:29:52,560 --> 00:29:55,960
Speaker 4: lovely woman who is aware of how this all unfolded

643
00:29:56,080 --> 00:29:58,720
Speaker 4: and has been so kind to me. I like to

644
00:29:58,760 --> 00:30:01,400
Speaker 4: think in another life you would be friends. I mean

645
00:30:01,920 --> 00:30:04,440
Speaker 4: be friends in this life, dude. I've spent a lot

646
00:30:04,440 --> 00:30:06,880
Speaker 4: of time putting together proof for her so she can

647
00:30:07,000 --> 00:30:10,280
Speaker 4: get what she deserves out of the divorce. Keeping in

648
00:30:10,320 --> 00:30:13,239
Speaker 4: touch with the wife angered Bruce and my mother so

649
00:30:13,480 --> 00:30:17,680
Speaker 4: much that they told my family I was pestering the wife. Wow,

650
00:30:17,720 --> 00:30:21,120
Speaker 4: that fueled the fire more for my family to hate me.

651
00:30:21,560 --> 00:30:23,760
Speaker 2: I mean, if there's anyway that you can be like, hey,

652
00:30:24,200 --> 00:30:27,560
Speaker 2: here's proof, here's my good relationship with the wife. She's

653
00:30:27,640 --> 00:30:31,000
Speaker 2: pretty thankful, pretty grateful that I sent this to her.

654
00:30:31,400 --> 00:30:34,240
Speaker 4: To the few that have commented, I should have minded

655
00:30:34,280 --> 00:30:37,480
Speaker 4: my own business, I wish this never was my business.

656
00:30:37,680 --> 00:30:40,200
Speaker 2: What a laugh. She made it your business when she

657
00:30:40,360 --> 00:30:42,360
Speaker 2: told you that you had to keep the secret for

658
00:30:42,520 --> 00:30:43,160
Speaker 2: ten years.

659
00:30:43,680 --> 00:30:47,040
Speaker 4: With some relevant comments. Comment to one, Wait, why is

660
00:30:47,200 --> 00:30:50,440
Speaker 4: she mad? If you didn't tell the adulterer would still

661
00:30:50,480 --> 00:30:53,960
Speaker 4: be married and wouldn't be marrying your mom. Shouldn't she

662
00:30:54,040 --> 00:30:57,360
Speaker 4: be thanking you unless he never intended to marry your

663
00:30:57,400 --> 00:31:01,200
Speaker 4: mom and even she knows this lol. Commenter two. I'm

664
00:31:01,200 --> 00:31:04,240
Speaker 4: willing to bet the mom is pissed because Bruce stands

665
00:31:04,280 --> 00:31:07,280
Speaker 4: to lose a lot of assets and will possibly have

666
00:31:07,320 --> 00:31:10,200
Speaker 4: to pay alimony. Hard to say for sure, since we

667
00:31:10,240 --> 00:31:13,480
Speaker 4: don't know the details of Bruce's marriage, but money is

668
00:31:13,520 --> 00:31:16,320
Speaker 4: the only thing I can imagine being the reason he

669
00:31:16,360 --> 00:31:19,440
Speaker 4: didn't leave his wife earlier, and why mom would be

670
00:31:19,480 --> 00:31:22,160
Speaker 4: so mad. I'm no legal expert, but this is my

671
00:31:22,240 --> 00:31:26,440
Speaker 4: best guest, and op said bingo yeah. Commenter three, why

672
00:31:26,520 --> 00:31:29,360
Speaker 4: isn't your mother happy about what you did? She finally

673
00:31:29,360 --> 00:31:32,000
Speaker 4: got the man that will cheat on his wife. Crazy

674
00:31:32,280 --> 00:31:34,200
Speaker 4: that this woman's like, I can't wait to marry the

675
00:31:34,240 --> 00:31:36,560
Speaker 4: man that Yeah, he was married, cheated with me?

676
00:31:36,680 --> 00:31:40,320
Speaker 6: Yeah, how could you tell his wife?

677
00:31:40,480 --> 00:31:40,720
Speaker 4: Yeah?

678
00:31:41,120 --> 00:31:43,480
Speaker 2: And now he's marrying me. I'm so upset at you.

679
00:31:43,920 --> 00:31:46,800
Speaker 4: I wonder how shocked she'll be when she chats her.

680
00:31:46,760 --> 00:31:49,280
Speaker 2: Someone else, probably person.

681
00:31:49,480 --> 00:31:52,880
Speaker 4: Yeah, Opi says she feels I betrayed her. I'm sure,

682
00:31:53,040 --> 00:31:56,680
Speaker 4: and I've ended her lavish lifestyle with his money. Commenter four,

683
00:31:56,880 --> 00:31:59,000
Speaker 4: why not reach out to a relative to see what

684
00:31:59,080 --> 00:32:01,480
Speaker 4: story your mom is telling telling them? I think you're

685
00:32:01,560 --> 00:32:04,600
Speaker 4: right to suspect she is telling a very slanted version

686
00:32:04,640 --> 00:32:08,120
Speaker 4: of events. Opie says, I tried with many of them.

687
00:32:08,600 --> 00:32:11,640
Speaker 4: They won't tell me. And where's Opie's dad and all

688
00:32:11,680 --> 00:32:14,480
Speaker 4: of this? Opie says, not a good relationship with him,

689
00:32:14,520 --> 00:32:17,479
Speaker 4: and he's annoyed. I did this, thinks I cause drama.

690
00:32:17,800 --> 00:32:21,840
Speaker 4: Some additional information from OPI after reading comments. Opie says,

691
00:32:21,840 --> 00:32:24,800
Speaker 4: my family still won't talk to me. It's been almost

692
00:32:24,840 --> 00:32:27,640
Speaker 4: six months of no contact for my mom. I have

693
00:32:27,760 --> 00:32:30,560
Speaker 4: tried many times to reach out. As far as I know,

694
00:32:30,800 --> 00:32:33,440
Speaker 4: Bruce and my mother are still wanting to get married.

695
00:32:33,600 --> 00:32:38,160
Speaker 4: They're waiting on their divorces. I talked to Bruce's wife Monthly,

696
00:32:38,400 --> 00:32:41,440
Speaker 4: who is still devastated by all of this, and she

697
00:32:41,560 --> 00:32:44,920
Speaker 4: continues to be nothing but kind to me. She's expressed

698
00:32:44,920 --> 00:32:47,640
Speaker 4: her desire to meet in person to thank me. She

699
00:32:47,840 --> 00:32:52,240
Speaker 4: hired a forensic lawyer and found twenty two hidden credit

700
00:32:52,320 --> 00:32:52,960
Speaker 4: card Oh.

701
00:32:54,040 --> 00:32:57,640
Speaker 2: Dad, he keeps getting worse.

702
00:32:59,240 --> 00:33:00,480
Speaker 5: I don't know about you.

703
00:33:00,840 --> 00:33:03,600
Speaker 4: But I'm feeling twenty two counts of credit card fraud.

704
00:33:03,920 --> 00:33:04,640
Speaker 2: Yoicks.

705
00:33:05,000 --> 00:33:08,080
Speaker 4: I helped her build a timeline with all evidence I had,

706
00:33:08,200 --> 00:33:11,400
Speaker 4: so she'll be getting what she deserves from the divorce. Yeah,

707
00:33:11,440 --> 00:33:14,280
Speaker 4: it's been hard without my family, but I have to

708
00:33:14,280 --> 00:33:16,600
Speaker 4: hold on to the fact that I helped the stranger

709
00:33:16,960 --> 00:33:20,440
Speaker 4: and stayed true to my own morals. I know I

710
00:33:20,480 --> 00:33:21,680
Speaker 4: did the right thing. You did.

711
00:33:22,040 --> 00:33:25,200
Speaker 2: You literally you have solid proof that you did, because

712
00:33:25,240 --> 00:33:26,440
Speaker 2: this woman is coming to you and.

713
00:33:26,440 --> 00:33:29,960
Speaker 4: Saying yeah, thank you, over and over yeah.

714
00:33:29,640 --> 00:33:32,720
Speaker 2: And finding out more and more information. So you absolutely

715
00:33:32,760 --> 00:33:33,600
Speaker 2: did the right thing.

716
00:33:33,840 --> 00:33:36,440
Speaker 4: And I love that you're helping her with her It's.

717
00:33:36,280 --> 00:33:40,440
Speaker 2: Like, Okay, Mom, fine, bye, I'm gonna ruin your new

718
00:33:40,600 --> 00:33:45,040
Speaker 2: husband financially. Have fun, deal with it, my mom.

719
00:33:45,640 --> 00:33:50,040
Speaker 4: Update fourteen point five months later, Okay, I told on

720
00:33:50,120 --> 00:33:53,320
Speaker 4: my mom's married boyfriend and ruined my life. One point

721
00:33:53,360 --> 00:33:57,040
Speaker 4: five year later, update, it has been eighteen months since

722
00:33:57,040 --> 00:33:59,600
Speaker 4: I blew my family life up by tattling on my

723
00:33:59,640 --> 00:34:02,800
Speaker 4: mother for being the other woman for twelve plus years,

724
00:34:03,280 --> 00:34:06,600
Speaker 4: so it was even longer than ten eighteen months of

725
00:34:06,640 --> 00:34:09,319
Speaker 4: a smear campaign against me that has turned all of

726
00:34:09,320 --> 00:34:13,920
Speaker 4: my family except one sister and close family friends against me,

727
00:34:14,440 --> 00:34:18,440
Speaker 4: even my grandparents who basically raised me. Bruce's wife and

728
00:34:18,480 --> 00:34:21,160
Speaker 4: I still keep in touch every few months. She has

729
00:34:21,200 --> 00:34:24,040
Speaker 4: gone through way worse than I have. Her life was

730
00:34:24,040 --> 00:34:27,279
Speaker 4: a lie, and she struggles daily to comprehend everything that

731
00:34:27,320 --> 00:34:30,359
Speaker 4: has happened. I feel so much shame that my mother

732
00:34:30,560 --> 00:34:34,160
Speaker 4: is half responsible for this woman's heartbreak. She still has

733
00:34:34,239 --> 00:34:36,680
Speaker 4: been nothing but kind to me. The big question that

734
00:34:36,719 --> 00:34:40,800
Speaker 4: remained unanswered for eighteen months, why did my family alienate me?

735
00:34:41,280 --> 00:34:44,520
Speaker 4: What lie did my mother and Bruce tell that made

736
00:34:44,520 --> 00:34:46,840
Speaker 4: them not even give me a chance to speak? The

737
00:34:46,920 --> 00:34:49,440
Speaker 4: truth is that I told on my mom's married boyfriend

738
00:34:49,520 --> 00:34:53,399
Speaker 4: and blew up their vacation mode relationship. But we all

739
00:34:53,440 --> 00:34:56,280
Speaker 4: know that couldn't be what she was telling people. Every

740
00:34:56,400 --> 00:34:59,239
Speaker 4: night I would lay awake wondering what it was that

741
00:34:59,320 --> 00:35:02,520
Speaker 4: was said about me, and I finally got the answer

742
00:35:02,760 --> 00:35:06,400
Speaker 4: a year and a half later. My mother told everyone

743
00:35:06,640 --> 00:35:09,640
Speaker 4: that I was a substance regular user.

744
00:35:09,920 --> 00:35:12,919
Speaker 2: I mean, it's just so crazy when people who do

745
00:35:13,160 --> 00:35:16,680
Speaker 2: bad things like this, yeah, have to make up these

746
00:35:16,719 --> 00:35:20,480
Speaker 2: outrageous lies because other they know that no one would

747
00:35:20,520 --> 00:35:21,919
Speaker 2: defend their action.

748
00:35:22,440 --> 00:35:25,720
Speaker 4: It's still crazy to me that despite your whole family

749
00:35:25,760 --> 00:35:27,439
Speaker 4: getting that lie, none of them.

750
00:35:27,440 --> 00:35:30,920
Speaker 2: Like I'm checked, one of them checked. Yeah, we should go.

751
00:35:30,960 --> 00:35:35,000
Speaker 4: Help you, that I was effective cognitively from substance use.

752
00:35:35,480 --> 00:35:37,239
Speaker 4: None of you know me, but I am not a

753
00:35:37,280 --> 00:35:41,720
Speaker 4: substance regular user. My family believed that lie without question,

754
00:35:42,040 --> 00:35:44,600
Speaker 4: because who would lie on their own child like that.

755
00:35:45,200 --> 00:35:47,560
Speaker 4: She had to say a lie so far from the

756
00:35:47,600 --> 00:35:49,480
Speaker 4: truth that no one would question her.

757
00:35:49,680 --> 00:35:50,600
Speaker 2: So there it is.

758
00:35:50,920 --> 00:35:53,960
Speaker 4: The damage is done from all ends. Also, don't you

759
00:35:54,040 --> 00:35:55,839
Speaker 4: have a sister that's still talking to you though? How

760
00:35:55,960 --> 00:35:56,920
Speaker 4: is she not going back?

761
00:35:56,960 --> 00:35:57,440
Speaker 2: I don't know.

762
00:35:57,719 --> 00:36:00,040
Speaker 4: She said that she had one sister on her side still.

763
00:36:00,200 --> 00:36:03,080
Speaker 2: Yeah, I don't know how that sister's not. Like Ah, guys,

764
00:36:03,239 --> 00:36:04,520
Speaker 2: the oldest sister's fond.

765
00:36:04,600 --> 00:36:08,160
Speaker 4: When my family thinks I'm a substance regular user, and

766
00:36:08,200 --> 00:36:11,240
Speaker 4: I'll never forgive my family for believing that and turning

767
00:36:11,280 --> 00:36:14,319
Speaker 4: on me. I pled with so many of them. I

768
00:36:14,400 --> 00:36:17,319
Speaker 4: sent them the entire story from start to finish, and

769
00:36:17,400 --> 00:36:20,000
Speaker 4: no one broke and came to my side. I will

770
00:36:20,040 --> 00:36:23,160
Speaker 4: never forgive my mother. So much has happened these past

771
00:36:23,160 --> 00:36:26,520
Speaker 4: eighteen months and it's all her fault. She almost broke me.

772
00:36:26,640 --> 00:36:29,439
Speaker 4: But thankfully I have an amazing family of my own.

773
00:36:29,640 --> 00:36:33,800
Speaker 4: I created a husband and two daughters and amazing in laws.

774
00:36:34,040 --> 00:36:36,560
Speaker 4: My sister and I have never been closer. We are

775
00:36:36,600 --> 00:36:39,360
Speaker 4: healing together. The only thing I wish now is for

776
00:36:39,480 --> 00:36:42,680
Speaker 4: my mother to stop smearing me. My husband deployed for

777
00:36:42,760 --> 00:36:46,440
Speaker 4: six months, and she actively lied on me to people

778
00:36:46,840 --> 00:36:49,160
Speaker 4: that would come and help me during that time to

779
00:36:49,160 --> 00:36:52,759
Speaker 4: try to isolate me further. There is no limit to

780
00:36:52,800 --> 00:36:56,759
Speaker 4: her mental torment. My mother will always be my biggest bully.

781
00:36:57,320 --> 00:37:00,280
Speaker 4: Going no contact with a narc parent is so hard.

782
00:37:00,640 --> 00:37:03,000
Speaker 4: Don't let any old hag out there and tell you

783
00:37:03,080 --> 00:37:06,480
Speaker 4: it's their first time living too, it's your parent. At

784
00:37:06,520 --> 00:37:09,239
Speaker 4: the end of the day, I am her child, and

785
00:37:09,280 --> 00:37:13,000
Speaker 4: she chose an ugly balding man over me and two

786
00:37:13,040 --> 00:37:17,440
Speaker 4: amazing granddaughters. Will always be her loss. Thanks again for

787
00:37:17,520 --> 00:37:19,799
Speaker 4: letting me get it off my chest. There's a little

788
00:37:19,840 --> 00:37:22,000
Speaker 4: bit more some comments.

789
00:37:21,560 --> 00:37:25,560
Speaker 2: But I'm sorry. There's just I think even if my

790
00:37:25,680 --> 00:37:29,239
Speaker 2: mom goes around and tells a little family like, hey, yeah,

791
00:37:29,320 --> 00:37:32,719
Speaker 2: don't listen to whatever Sophia says, she's got a substance, right,

792
00:37:32,719 --> 00:37:36,120
Speaker 2: hey problem. My family would absolutely, I would.

793
00:37:35,880 --> 00:37:38,560
Speaker 4: Hope, immediately communitly go to me and.

794
00:37:38,440 --> 00:37:39,880
Speaker 2: Be like, are you okay?

795
00:37:40,040 --> 00:37:40,200
Speaker 4: Right?

796
00:37:40,640 --> 00:37:43,680
Speaker 2: What help can we get you? I know you have kids?

797
00:37:44,160 --> 00:37:46,120
Speaker 2: Do we need to get them somehow?

798
00:37:46,360 --> 00:37:46,560
Speaker 4: Right?

799
00:37:47,200 --> 00:37:49,480
Speaker 2: But none of that. I wouldn't forgive them either. I'd

800
00:37:49,520 --> 00:37:52,640
Speaker 2: be like, wow, you not only believed my mother, you

801
00:37:52,719 --> 00:37:54,319
Speaker 2: also didn't even check up on.

802
00:37:54,360 --> 00:37:58,279
Speaker 4: Me, right? How it like only one sister coming out

803
00:37:58,360 --> 00:38:00,000
Speaker 4: to be like and what really happen?

804
00:38:00,440 --> 00:38:00,720
Speaker 2: Yeah?

805
00:38:00,760 --> 00:38:05,000
Speaker 4: Crazy? Yeah weleven't comments commenter one, Wow, the way you

806
00:38:05,040 --> 00:38:08,160
Speaker 4: were treated is absolutely horrible. I do not blame you

807
00:38:08,239 --> 00:38:11,480
Speaker 4: for having resentment against your family members who abandon you

808
00:38:11,600 --> 00:38:14,040
Speaker 4: like that. Do you still have a relationship with your

809
00:38:14,040 --> 00:38:16,920
Speaker 4: father and his side of your family? Opie says. My

810
00:38:17,000 --> 00:38:19,640
Speaker 4: father was upset at me at first because it caused

811
00:38:19,680 --> 00:38:21,879
Speaker 4: a lot of headache for him. He and my mother

812
00:38:22,000 --> 00:38:25,520
Speaker 4: were only separated, not divorced. He didn't want to give

813
00:38:25,600 --> 00:38:30,000
Speaker 4: up his pension, and he was also told the BS version.

814
00:38:30,480 --> 00:38:32,640
Speaker 4: So it honestly took about a year to get him

815
00:38:32,640 --> 00:38:36,160
Speaker 4: to truly understand the truth. We've never had a great relationship,

816
00:38:36,280 --> 00:38:39,320
Speaker 4: but we are growing closer now. Comment or two says,

817
00:38:39,680 --> 00:38:42,160
Speaker 4: have a lawyer send her a cease and assist letter.

818
00:38:42,280 --> 00:38:43,480
Speaker 4: It's a great idea.

819
00:38:43,280 --> 00:38:46,000
Speaker 2: Yeah, say like hey slander yeah.

820
00:38:45,680 --> 00:38:48,640
Speaker 4: Bible stating if she does not stop lying, there will

821
00:38:48,640 --> 00:38:51,400
Speaker 4: be a lawsuit. Opie says, I'm a stay at home mom.

822
00:38:51,640 --> 00:38:54,040
Speaker 4: Bruce has got a lot more money than me, and

823
00:38:54,120 --> 00:38:56,759
Speaker 4: there's an added layer of complication with me living in

824
00:38:56,760 --> 00:39:00,240
Speaker 4: Canada and Bruce and now my mother living in the U.

825
00:38:59,960 --> 00:39:02,919
Speaker 4: S I think about it all the time though, and

826
00:39:03,080 --> 00:39:06,640
Speaker 4: OPI on are the divorces finalized for the mother and

827
00:39:06,800 --> 00:39:10,279
Speaker 4: Bruce and have they gotten married? Opie says divorces for

828
00:39:10,360 --> 00:39:14,000
Speaker 4: both of them have only just finalized, so no, not yet,

829
00:39:14,440 --> 00:39:17,280
Speaker 4: but only a matter of time, especially with her trying

830
00:39:17,280 --> 00:39:19,520
Speaker 4: to reside in the US with him when we are

831
00:39:19,560 --> 00:39:23,920
Speaker 4: from Canada. And Opie responding to a downvoted commenter about

832
00:39:23,960 --> 00:39:27,880
Speaker 4: if Bruce's ex wife deserve to know what happened. Yeah,

833
00:39:28,120 --> 00:39:30,440
Speaker 4: Opie says, you don't think Bruce's wife had a right

834
00:39:30,480 --> 00:39:34,040
Speaker 4: to know. When this all started, my youngest sibling was six.

835
00:39:34,600 --> 00:39:37,440
Speaker 4: We have been dealing with this for twelve plus years,

836
00:39:37,480 --> 00:39:40,279
Speaker 4: and I couldn't take it anymore. Yes, I thought they

837
00:39:40,320 --> 00:39:42,920
Speaker 4: would break up. No, I don't regret telling.

838
00:39:43,360 --> 00:39:47,080
Speaker 2: Yeah, no you should. You literally helped her and she

839
00:39:47,239 --> 00:39:50,400
Speaker 2: thanked you, so clearly you did the right thing. Yeah,

840
00:39:50,440 --> 00:39:53,000
Speaker 2: but that is the end of that story. And we've

841
00:39:53,040 --> 00:39:56,600
Speaker 2: got another one. Come right up. My married friend confessed

842
00:39:56,680 --> 00:40:01,120
Speaker 2: his attraction to me runaway. I hate that I'm here,

843
00:40:01,880 --> 00:40:04,920
Speaker 2: but this has been messing with my head. My friend

844
00:40:04,960 --> 00:40:07,399
Speaker 2: twenty six male and I twenty five female, have been

845
00:40:07,440 --> 00:40:11,520
Speaker 2: friends since the sixth grade. We've always been pretty close.

846
00:40:12,000 --> 00:40:14,000
Speaker 2: He asked me out once or twice in high school,

847
00:40:14,000 --> 00:40:17,520
Speaker 2: but I said no once or twice, mostly because I

848
00:40:17,560 --> 00:40:19,839
Speaker 2: wasn't allowed to date. By the way, this comes from

849
00:40:19,880 --> 00:40:22,040
Speaker 2: Clementine eighteen twelve. And if you want to submit your

850
00:40:22,040 --> 00:40:24,359
Speaker 2: own stories, good to your slash Okay storytime subured at

851
00:40:24,400 --> 00:40:27,600
Speaker 2: I'm Sophia, I'm Carly, and I'm Keon, and we're here

852
00:40:27,640 --> 00:40:29,600
Speaker 2: to give good advice. Goofully, But we don't have all

853
00:40:29,600 --> 00:40:31,520
Speaker 2: the answers. We only know what we'd do, So let

854
00:40:31,640 --> 00:40:33,880
Speaker 2: us know what you would do in the comments, and

855
00:40:34,040 --> 00:40:38,520
Speaker 2: op says there was never any romantic implication of interest

856
00:40:38,640 --> 00:40:42,200
Speaker 2: after that. Fast forward to now, we've both been married

857
00:40:42,239 --> 00:40:45,839
Speaker 2: for about two years, attended each other's weddings. I hang

858
00:40:45,840 --> 00:40:48,719
Speaker 2: out with his wife regularly. He hangs out with my

859
00:40:48,840 --> 00:40:52,600
Speaker 2: husband regularly. We go on double dates. It's always been

860
00:40:52,960 --> 00:40:55,400
Speaker 2: super fun and normal. He and his wife have been

861
00:40:55,440 --> 00:40:57,400
Speaker 2: open with my husband and me that they are hoping

862
00:40:57,400 --> 00:41:00,440
Speaker 2: to have kids next year. A few nights ago, my

863
00:41:00,600 --> 00:41:03,720
Speaker 2: friend and I were both up late texting, which isn't

864
00:41:03,840 --> 00:41:06,240
Speaker 2: unusual for us since we've been friends for a decade

865
00:41:06,280 --> 00:41:09,160
Speaker 2: and a half. He generally works the graveyard shift at

866
00:41:09,160 --> 00:41:12,440
Speaker 2: his job, and I've had insomnia my whole life. We

867
00:41:12,440 --> 00:41:14,440
Speaker 2: were talking about a show we both like, and I

868
00:41:14,480 --> 00:41:16,399
Speaker 2: was like, oh, dude, you need to see my new

869
00:41:16,440 --> 00:41:19,040
Speaker 2: themed after the show sweatpants had just got and sent

870
00:41:19,160 --> 00:41:21,360
Speaker 2: him a photo just at the sweats because I was

871
00:41:21,360 --> 00:41:24,080
Speaker 2: wearing them. He then asked if there was a matching shirt,

872
00:41:24,120 --> 00:41:26,759
Speaker 2: to which I said nope, and he asked me to

873
00:41:26,800 --> 00:41:30,880
Speaker 2: show what top I was wearing anyway, simmer down, buddy,

874
00:41:31,280 --> 00:41:37,640
Speaker 2: why simmer down married? It wasn't appropriate, so I declined.

875
00:41:38,160 --> 00:41:41,040
Speaker 2: Now at that point, that's like a full on converce.

876
00:41:41,040 --> 00:41:41,759
Speaker 2: That's not just like a.

877
00:41:42,040 --> 00:41:44,600
Speaker 4: No, that's like what are you doing.

878
00:41:45,200 --> 00:41:46,880
Speaker 2: I'm going to marry I'm going to talk to my

879
00:41:47,040 --> 00:41:49,839
Speaker 2: husband about this and your wife, why did you think

880
00:41:49,880 --> 00:41:52,480
Speaker 2: that was an acceptable comment to make? Back in twenty eighteen,

881
00:41:52,560 --> 00:41:55,280
Speaker 2: I went through a really rough breakup this is relevant,

882
00:41:55,280 --> 00:41:58,279
Speaker 2: bear with me, and was just generally making a lot

883
00:41:58,320 --> 00:42:02,600
Speaker 2: of crappy decisions, one of which directly impacted him. I

884
00:42:02,640 --> 00:42:05,319
Speaker 2: don't have any memory of this, although I believe him,

885
00:42:05,680 --> 00:42:07,799
Speaker 2: but he randomly brought up that I sent him a

886
00:42:07,840 --> 00:42:10,440
Speaker 2: certain type of photo back then and that he rode

887
00:42:10,480 --> 00:42:13,759
Speaker 2: that high for a month. He told me this after saying, well,

888
00:42:13,800 --> 00:42:16,000
Speaker 2: it's not like I haven't already seen it. And that's

889
00:42:16,040 --> 00:42:19,719
Speaker 2: when we stop the friendship and say, oh, sorry, can't

890
00:42:19,719 --> 00:42:22,919
Speaker 2: be friends with you anymore because you keep violating boundaries.

891
00:42:23,360 --> 00:42:26,719
Speaker 2: That's so icky, And asked me again to share what

892
00:42:26,840 --> 00:42:30,200
Speaker 2: top I was wearing, and again I said no. At

893
00:42:30,200 --> 00:42:32,400
Speaker 2: that point, he told me that he's essentially been in

894
00:42:32,400 --> 00:42:34,680
Speaker 2: love with me since middle school and that he's happy

895
00:42:34,760 --> 00:42:37,719
Speaker 2: in his marriage and knows I'm happy in mine, but

896
00:42:37,840 --> 00:42:41,000
Speaker 2: that he's always wondered deep down what would have happened

897
00:42:41,040 --> 00:42:42,000
Speaker 2: if we got together?

898
00:42:42,560 --> 00:42:45,880
Speaker 5: Did oh tell your wife that? Did tell your wife that?

899
00:42:46,000 --> 00:42:46,319
Speaker 5: Right now?

900
00:42:46,520 --> 00:42:49,560
Speaker 2: It threw me for a loop. I've never had any

901
00:42:49,600 --> 00:42:52,600
Speaker 2: indication of this, or maybe I'm just oblivious, And he

902
00:42:52,640 --> 00:42:55,400
Speaker 2: went on to tell me how much he's fantasized about

903
00:42:55,400 --> 00:43:02,960
Speaker 2: me and things like that. Ah ah. I didn't want

904
00:43:03,000 --> 00:43:05,400
Speaker 2: things to get more awkward than they were. So it

905
00:43:05,520 --> 00:43:09,400
Speaker 2: was a lot of that's crazy, dude.

906
00:43:09,640 --> 00:43:12,400
Speaker 4: No, it's a lot of Hey, I have your wife's

907
00:43:12,600 --> 00:43:13,800
Speaker 4: phone number.

908
00:43:13,719 --> 00:43:16,239
Speaker 2: I'm texting your wife. Yeah, it shouldn't just be dang it,

909
00:43:16,360 --> 00:43:19,160
Speaker 2: that's crazy. Yeah. The next day he texted me and

910
00:43:19,200 --> 00:43:22,560
Speaker 2: asked how I was doing, but I told him I

911
00:43:22,600 --> 00:43:25,120
Speaker 2: felt a little weird and that he had come very

912
00:43:25,120 --> 00:43:30,360
Speaker 2: close to cross the line. But cross its What do

913
00:43:30,480 --> 00:43:31,960
Speaker 2: you mean crossed it?

914
00:43:32,480 --> 00:43:33,920
Speaker 4: He fully crossed.

915
00:43:33,640 --> 00:43:38,960
Speaker 2: Across that line, danced over that line? What are you

916
00:43:39,120 --> 00:43:39,840
Speaker 2: talking about?

917
00:43:39,840 --> 00:43:40,040
Speaker 1: Op?

918
00:43:40,360 --> 00:43:44,080
Speaker 2: If I was Ope's partner and found out that Op's

919
00:43:44,120 --> 00:43:47,920
Speaker 2: friend had sent this to her and she didn't tell me,

920
00:43:48,600 --> 00:43:51,920
Speaker 2: oh oh, I'd be like, oh, sorry, what do you mean?

921
00:43:51,960 --> 00:43:54,880
Speaker 2: That line wasn't crossed? That rot?

922
00:43:55,000 --> 00:43:56,480
Speaker 5: What's the line from surfs up?

923
00:43:56,600 --> 00:43:59,520
Speaker 2: Step Tommy Step Dommy. He was practically dancing on me.

924
00:44:00,080 --> 00:44:02,600
Speaker 2: That's what you were doing on that line? Nice, he said.

925
00:44:02,600 --> 00:44:05,160
Speaker 2: He agreed and apologized and said he didn't want anything

926
00:44:05,160 --> 00:44:08,920
Speaker 2: to change in our marriages or our friendship too freaking bad.

927
00:44:09,280 --> 00:44:12,919
Speaker 5: I guarantee you if Opie said no, let's do it, Yeah,

928
00:44:13,120 --> 00:44:14,399
Speaker 5: he'd be like, let's do that, urge.

929
00:44:14,480 --> 00:44:15,800
Speaker 2: You can be okay.

930
00:44:15,880 --> 00:44:18,520
Speaker 4: Do you think that the wife knows that OPI had

931
00:44:18,560 --> 00:44:21,560
Speaker 4: previously sent him a photo in their past?

932
00:44:21,640 --> 00:44:25,239
Speaker 2: I don't know. And to just leave it that night

933
00:44:25,680 --> 00:44:28,640
Speaker 2: and move on, y'all? Are both the a holes now

934
00:44:29,080 --> 00:44:30,080
Speaker 2: to your partners?

935
00:44:30,200 --> 00:44:30,399
Speaker 4: Yeah?

936
00:44:30,600 --> 00:44:34,640
Speaker 2: Tbh? I agreed, And then to end the conversation, he

937
00:44:34,719 --> 00:44:36,359
Speaker 2: told me that if I ever wanted to hear more

938
00:44:36,400 --> 00:44:38,480
Speaker 2: about his private thoughts about me, to let him.

939
00:44:38,320 --> 00:44:41,720
Speaker 4: Know he's still He's on the other side.

940
00:44:41,760 --> 00:44:45,000
Speaker 2: This is you, this is you. The line he's been

941
00:44:45,040 --> 00:44:46,960
Speaker 2: over here for the whole story.

942
00:44:47,000 --> 00:44:49,000
Speaker 5: He went past you over here.

943
00:44:49,760 --> 00:44:51,680
Speaker 2: He's like, hey, if you ever want to hear about

944
00:44:51,719 --> 00:44:53,560
Speaker 2: my thoughts, and you're like trying to talk to him

945
00:44:53,600 --> 00:44:57,880
Speaker 2: over here, but he's behind you. He has passed this line.

946
00:44:57,960 --> 00:45:00,200
Speaker 5: He's behind me, isn't He's right behind me?

947
00:45:00,320 --> 00:45:02,880
Speaker 2: Is any Obviously I don't plan to take him up

948
00:45:02,880 --> 00:45:04,600
Speaker 2: on that, but I don't really know how to move

949
00:45:04,600 --> 00:45:07,760
Speaker 2: forward with this information. Hell, your husband, husband, I still

950
00:45:07,800 --> 00:45:11,040
Speaker 2: really value the friendship. He's one of my longest lasting friends.

951
00:45:11,160 --> 00:45:14,280
Speaker 2: I've never been in a situation like this. That's not true,

952
00:45:14,719 --> 00:45:17,080
Speaker 2: and it's weird. I'd love to get some advice you

953
00:45:17,200 --> 00:45:20,200
Speaker 2: have been a situation like this, because he's done it before.

954
00:45:20,920 --> 00:45:23,640
Speaker 4: And also he fully just threw away this friendship. It

955
00:45:23,680 --> 00:45:26,799
Speaker 4: wasn't like he is ending it. And you know, I.

956
00:45:26,960 --> 00:45:30,759
Speaker 2: Really said that he's done this once or twice, which

957
00:45:30,840 --> 00:45:33,200
Speaker 2: you know how many times he's done it, it's probably

958
00:45:33,239 --> 00:45:36,160
Speaker 2: three times. Yeah, we're being honest, So you already know

959
00:45:36,320 --> 00:45:38,680
Speaker 2: that he'd probably do this again, or you know that

960
00:45:38,719 --> 00:45:39,279
Speaker 2: he felt like this.

961
00:45:39,600 --> 00:45:41,800
Speaker 4: At this point, I'm thinking you have the same feeling

962
00:45:42,239 --> 00:45:43,880
Speaker 4: and they want this to go that way.

963
00:45:44,000 --> 00:45:46,800
Speaker 2: If you sent him something allegedly.

964
00:45:46,640 --> 00:45:49,440
Speaker 4: Also not gonna lie. Even before we went on the

965
00:45:49,520 --> 00:45:53,200
Speaker 4: fact that the way she described the pajama pants photo,

966
00:45:53,680 --> 00:45:56,560
Speaker 4: I was already immediately like, that's weird. Yeah, even my

967
00:45:56,640 --> 00:45:58,359
Speaker 4: guy friends that I've had for ten plus years would

968
00:45:58,400 --> 00:45:59,760
Speaker 4: never get a picture of the pants.

969
00:46:00,520 --> 00:46:02,040
Speaker 2: Yeah, he's John Oge Host.

970
00:46:02,080 --> 00:46:03,560
Speaker 1: We don't get back to the stories, but a quick

971
00:46:03,560 --> 00:46:04,799
Speaker 1: free minute break of ads from our.

972
00:46:04,680 --> 00:46:08,279
Speaker 2: Sponsors comment one must be really weird thinking of him

973
00:46:08,280 --> 00:46:11,319
Speaker 2: alone in his bedroom, thinking of you. Personally, I had

974
00:46:11,400 --> 00:46:13,960
Speaker 2: step back from late night texting, as it would appear

975
00:46:14,040 --> 00:46:17,040
Speaker 2: this just seems to encourage him, and as you're both married,

976
00:46:17,080 --> 00:46:20,120
Speaker 2: I put strict boundaries up so he's clear exactly where

977
00:46:20,120 --> 00:46:22,640
Speaker 2: you stand. I literally would tell him that he needs

978
00:46:22,680 --> 00:46:24,680
Speaker 2: to tell his wife he loves you.

979
00:46:25,160 --> 00:46:28,359
Speaker 4: Yeah, tell your husband, and then together you guys can

980
00:46:28,400 --> 00:46:31,360
Speaker 4: all go tell the white Yay yay reply.

981
00:46:31,520 --> 00:46:34,120
Speaker 2: I really don't understand how some people are so naive

982
00:46:34,160 --> 00:46:37,040
Speaker 2: that they think that doing this is just innocent and normal.

983
00:46:37,400 --> 00:46:40,080
Speaker 2: There is one person who I text late at night,

984
00:46:40,120 --> 00:46:43,399
Speaker 2: and that is my girlfriend reply. I text my brother

985
00:46:43,440 --> 00:46:45,640
Speaker 2: and sister in law late. I text my cousin late,

986
00:46:45,680 --> 00:46:48,160
Speaker 2: and I text several of my friends, both men and

987
00:46:48,160 --> 00:46:51,000
Speaker 2: women late. I'm a night owl, so are some of

988
00:46:51,000 --> 00:46:53,120
Speaker 2: the people in my circle. I also have four kids,

989
00:46:53,120 --> 00:46:56,520
Speaker 2: so focusing on conversations at normal times is next to impossible.

990
00:46:56,840 --> 00:46:59,200
Speaker 2: There are plenty of reasons to text night that aren't

991
00:46:59,239 --> 00:47:01,839
Speaker 2: trying to f someone. I agree with that, I will say,

992
00:47:01,920 --> 00:47:05,919
Speaker 2: I don't think the time is the problem. Yeah, it's

993
00:47:06,000 --> 00:47:06,680
Speaker 2: the content.

994
00:47:06,800 --> 00:47:10,280
Speaker 4: Those conversations could be more like catching up or planning stuff,

995
00:47:10,280 --> 00:47:13,080
Speaker 4: not Yes, show me what your top looks like.

996
00:47:13,719 --> 00:47:16,359
Speaker 2: Yeah, the time has really nothing to do with it.

997
00:47:16,360 --> 00:47:20,719
Speaker 2: It's the content of the message. Yeah, comment too, he

998
00:47:20,920 --> 00:47:25,040
Speaker 2: definitely crossed a line. Reply says right, I'm just sitting

999
00:47:25,120 --> 00:47:28,520
Speaker 2: here like, how did he not cross a line? He's

1000
00:47:28,640 --> 00:47:30,880
Speaker 2: openly inviting her to have an affair, and the only

1001
00:47:30,960 --> 00:47:34,880
Speaker 2: reason it hasn't gone there is because OPI declined his

1002
00:47:35,160 --> 00:47:39,800
Speaker 2: blatant invitations to spicy text a mess waiting to happen.

1003
00:47:40,160 --> 00:47:42,399
Speaker 2: If either spouse finds out about this on their own,

1004
00:47:42,520 --> 00:47:45,959
Speaker 2: it's gonna blow up in both of their faces. Reply says,

1005
00:47:46,040 --> 00:47:48,479
Speaker 2: I was curious what the line is in Op's mind?

1006
00:47:48,800 --> 00:47:50,600
Speaker 2: Such an unfair place for her to be put in,

1007
00:47:51,000 --> 00:47:53,000
Speaker 2: and she still didn't want to hurt his feelings. She

1008
00:47:53,120 --> 00:47:56,319
Speaker 2: let him down, assured him he didn't cross the line,

1009
00:47:56,400 --> 00:47:59,440
Speaker 2: told him how much she valued him. Gently. Letting a

1010
00:47:59,520 --> 00:48:02,319
Speaker 2: guy down means in his mind that it's okay to

1011
00:48:02,400 --> 00:48:06,440
Speaker 2: keep going. It will happen again. Yeah, dang, that's crazy.

1012
00:48:06,600 --> 00:48:10,240
Speaker 2: Isn't shutting someone down? He is hoping OPI is curious

1013
00:48:10,280 --> 00:48:12,080
Speaker 2: and if she keeps him in her life, he will

1014
00:48:12,120 --> 00:48:15,680
Speaker 2: try and try again until she forces it to stop.

1015
00:48:15,960 --> 00:48:18,480
Speaker 2: Such an unfair position for a friend to put someone in.

1016
00:48:18,960 --> 00:48:21,719
Speaker 2: And edit from Ope for clarity, because I wrote this

1017
00:48:21,760 --> 00:48:23,360
Speaker 2: in the middle of the night when I was exhausted.

1018
00:48:23,960 --> 00:48:26,840
Speaker 2: I'm frequently up late at night. This wasn't some weird,

1019
00:48:26,920 --> 00:48:29,840
Speaker 2: one off, sneaky thing. I work long days, so most

1020
00:48:29,840 --> 00:48:32,480
Speaker 2: of my interactions with people happen at night. When I

1021
00:48:32,520 --> 00:48:34,640
Speaker 2: was eighteen and twenty eighteen, I was kind of throwing

1022
00:48:34,640 --> 00:48:37,560
Speaker 2: myself at everyone. My friend wasn't special.

1023
00:48:37,719 --> 00:48:38,040
Speaker 1: Lol.

1024
00:48:38,400 --> 00:48:41,439
Speaker 2: There's never been any indication of interest from him since

1025
00:48:41,520 --> 00:48:44,200
Speaker 2: high school until a few nights ago. He is not

1026
00:48:44,400 --> 00:48:47,640
Speaker 2: repeatedly said things like this, and I had honestly forgotten

1027
00:48:47,719 --> 00:48:51,160
Speaker 2: he'd even asked me out in high school until this conversation.

1028
00:48:51,600 --> 00:48:53,560
Speaker 4: You said he does repeatedly do this. Also, I just

1029
00:48:53,560 --> 00:48:57,040
Speaker 4: realized that OPI is my age. She was eighteen and

1030
00:48:57,040 --> 00:48:57,720
Speaker 4: twenty eighteen.

1031
00:48:58,200 --> 00:48:59,160
Speaker 2: That's my age.

1032
00:48:59,200 --> 00:49:01,759
Speaker 4: I'm like, how are you I'm doing this at this

1033
00:49:02,440 --> 00:49:03,960
Speaker 4: right age of mid twenties.

1034
00:49:04,560 --> 00:49:07,760
Speaker 2: Yeah. I have never seen him as more than a friend,

1035
00:49:07,800 --> 00:49:10,719
Speaker 2: despite my crazy phase as an eighteen year old. I

1036
00:49:10,760 --> 00:49:14,319
Speaker 2: don't really care, Ope, because he sees you as more

1037
00:49:14,360 --> 00:49:17,080
Speaker 2: than a friend, and you're not putting a stop to it,

1038
00:49:17,200 --> 00:49:20,279
Speaker 2: so it doesn't really matter what you think. Yes, he

1039
00:49:20,320 --> 00:49:22,479
Speaker 2: did ask me out in high school. Most high school

1040
00:49:22,520 --> 00:49:25,719
Speaker 2: crushes don't last a full lifetime. And since he never

1041
00:49:25,760 --> 00:49:27,880
Speaker 2: brought it up again after high school, even when I

1042
00:49:27,920 --> 00:49:31,480
Speaker 2: was vulnerable, I trusted him. This all happened over Snapchat?

1043
00:49:31,840 --> 00:49:34,120
Speaker 4: Why of course it did.

1044
00:49:34,480 --> 00:49:36,440
Speaker 2: Of course it did, which is the main way I

1045
00:49:36,480 --> 00:49:41,480
Speaker 2: communicate with everyone. Weird. I'm calling all Snapchat users, including

1046
00:49:41,480 --> 00:49:43,200
Speaker 2: my many multiple friends. You use Snapchat.

1047
00:49:43,560 --> 00:49:46,480
Speaker 4: I use Snapchat, but not to have your conversation weird.

1048
00:49:46,560 --> 00:49:48,400
Speaker 4: You want to know what I use it for? To

1049
00:49:48,520 --> 00:49:50,520
Speaker 4: snapchat the man sitting over.

1050
00:49:50,360 --> 00:49:53,719
Speaker 5: There, Oh, I like seeing videos of my cat.

1051
00:49:53,760 --> 00:49:57,120
Speaker 4: I said, a videos of hi, and like maybe some

1052
00:49:57,360 --> 00:49:59,319
Speaker 4: high school like my best friend met Home sends me

1053
00:49:59,480 --> 00:50:01,560
Speaker 4: videos for her Safari job.

1054
00:50:01,640 --> 00:50:02,520
Speaker 2: Yeah, you guys are weird.

1055
00:50:02,600 --> 00:50:04,240
Speaker 4: I would never have a conversation.

1056
00:50:04,120 --> 00:50:06,960
Speaker 5: Main form of communication. I don't call on Snapshet'd be like,

1057
00:50:06,960 --> 00:50:08,160
Speaker 5: all right, right, I wouldn't have.

1058
00:50:08,160 --> 00:50:10,040
Speaker 4: A conversation there. To be honest, the only reason I

1059
00:50:10,040 --> 00:50:14,200
Speaker 4: haven't gotten rid of it fully is because the memory experts, Okay,

1060
00:50:14,280 --> 00:50:15,640
Speaker 4: you can use it, no, but I'm with you that

1061
00:50:15,640 --> 00:50:16,840
Speaker 4: it's this is weird.

1062
00:50:17,239 --> 00:50:19,799
Speaker 5: Weird Using snapshot is your main form of communication is weird.

1063
00:50:19,920 --> 00:50:20,520
Speaker 5: That's just a weird.

1064
00:50:20,560 --> 00:50:23,680
Speaker 4: Flag And the fact that this happened over snapchat makes

1065
00:50:23,719 --> 00:50:25,960
Speaker 4: it like so much sketchy, worse.

1066
00:50:25,920 --> 00:50:27,840
Speaker 2: So much worse. Yeah, I do agree with that. So

1067
00:50:27,920 --> 00:50:31,920
Speaker 2: Unfortunately none of the conversation is there anymore so suspicious,

1068
00:50:32,560 --> 00:50:35,319
Speaker 2: which I do feel bad about being the case. I

1069
00:50:35,360 --> 00:50:40,160
Speaker 2: should have been clearer with that in my original post. Apologies. Yikes,

1070
00:50:40,520 --> 00:50:42,719
Speaker 2: the photo of my sweatpants was close enough you could

1071
00:50:42,760 --> 00:50:45,160
Speaker 2: only see the fabric pattern. If that's something that would

1072
00:50:45,200 --> 00:50:47,759
Speaker 2: turn you on, perhaps my situation isn't where your main

1073
00:50:47,760 --> 00:50:50,320
Speaker 2: focus should be. My friend and I have not spoken

1074
00:50:50,360 --> 00:50:53,320
Speaker 2: since that second conversation, and the more time that passes,

1075
00:50:53,800 --> 00:50:56,520
Speaker 2: the ick year. I feel about it and don't desire

1076
00:50:56,560 --> 00:50:59,960
Speaker 2: for the situation to happen again, and plan to enforce

1077
00:51:00,080 --> 00:51:03,600
Speaker 2: stricter boundaries with my friends when I feel comfortable enough

1078
00:51:03,600 --> 00:51:06,879
Speaker 2: to initiate contact with him. Yes, I should have shut

1079
00:51:06,920 --> 00:51:09,600
Speaker 2: it down rather than let him keep talking, but I

1080
00:51:09,640 --> 00:51:13,040
Speaker 2: also avoid awkward situations like the plague, and was reeling

1081
00:51:13,080 --> 00:51:17,160
Speaker 2: from realizing one of my longest friendships wasn't what I

1082
00:51:17,200 --> 00:51:19,759
Speaker 2: thought it was. As for telling my husband, while I

1083
00:51:19,800 --> 00:51:23,040
Speaker 2: normally would agree and we do have excellent communication, I

1084
00:51:23,239 --> 00:51:25,719
Speaker 2: genuinely don't think i'd want to know if he was

1085
00:51:25,800 --> 00:51:29,640
Speaker 2: in this situation. If he also wasn't reciprocating, I'm worried

1086
00:51:29,680 --> 00:51:32,279
Speaker 2: it will just cause unnecessary anxiety and drama. I have

1087
00:51:32,360 --> 00:51:35,600
Speaker 2: no plans of leaving my husband bad bad.

1088
00:51:35,760 --> 00:51:39,000
Speaker 4: He might want to know. Also, that's good communication would

1089
00:51:39,040 --> 00:51:41,680
Speaker 4: be telling him, Yeah, most definitely tell them I'm.

1090
00:51:41,560 --> 00:51:46,360
Speaker 2: Sorry causing a necessary drama. His friend and your friend

1091
00:51:46,719 --> 00:51:51,759
Speaker 2: mutual friends just confessed love to you. Yeah, yeah, that's

1092
00:51:51,800 --> 00:51:55,719
Speaker 2: something he needs to know. What do you mean, Oh, p,

1093
00:51:55,880 --> 00:51:57,719
Speaker 2: you're an ahle too. You guys are both the ale.

1094
00:51:57,840 --> 00:51:58,799
Speaker 2: This is everyone sucks here.

1095
00:51:59,080 --> 00:52:02,160
Speaker 4: I should say, we're not giving that much crap to

1096
00:52:02,680 --> 00:52:05,200
Speaker 4: the other guy, but that's because it's like we know

1097
00:52:05,280 --> 00:52:07,799
Speaker 4: that he's like, he's so clearly in the wrong. Yeah,

1098
00:52:07,800 --> 00:52:10,400
Speaker 4: we're also just now saying like, dude, tell your husband.

1099
00:52:10,480 --> 00:52:12,600
Speaker 2: Yeah, come on, Dutch just Becazana says, Okay, so the

1100
00:52:12,640 --> 00:52:14,800
Speaker 2: photo is less weird now. I do agree with that update.

1101
00:52:15,680 --> 00:52:19,600
Speaker 2: I talked to my husband about it. I really all

1102
00:52:19,640 --> 00:52:21,600
Speaker 2: the comments were like, dude, what are you talking about?

1103
00:52:21,600 --> 00:52:23,520
Speaker 2: Talk to your husband, talk your your husband. You told

1104
00:52:23,600 --> 00:52:27,319
Speaker 2: me it was weird, but seemed like a complimentary thing

1105
00:52:27,400 --> 00:52:30,200
Speaker 2: from the guy and to shut things down fast if

1106
00:52:30,200 --> 00:52:33,280
Speaker 2: it ever happens again. My hesitation with telling my husband

1107
00:52:33,320 --> 00:52:36,160
Speaker 2: was exactly this. You didn't really want to hear about it.

1108
00:52:36,640 --> 00:52:37,560
Speaker 2: I don't like you.

1109
00:52:38,080 --> 00:52:40,680
Speaker 4: I mean sure, if he doesn't want to hear you

1110
00:52:40,680 --> 00:52:43,080
Speaker 4: said you wouldn't want to hear. Maybe that's your guys's

1111
00:52:43,800 --> 00:52:45,759
Speaker 4: relationship and that's how it works. Maybe you did no

1112
00:52:45,840 --> 00:52:49,680
Speaker 4: better on that front, but ultimately, had this happened again,

1113
00:52:50,200 --> 00:52:52,640
Speaker 4: I think it's good that this isn't his first time

1114
00:52:52,680 --> 00:52:55,120
Speaker 4: hearing about it, and he can already have the information

1115
00:52:55,160 --> 00:52:57,759
Speaker 4: that he needs to help you however you need. And

1116
00:52:57,760 --> 00:52:59,520
Speaker 4: it's not like oh and by the way, like also

1117
00:52:59,600 --> 00:53:01,040
Speaker 4: too much to go this happens.

1118
00:53:01,040 --> 00:53:03,840
Speaker 2: He's been in love with me and I didn't really

1119
00:53:03,880 --> 00:53:05,719
Speaker 2: tell him to stop saying that.

1120
00:53:05,880 --> 00:53:07,600
Speaker 4: Right. I feel like maybe you spun the story to

1121
00:53:07,640 --> 00:53:11,320
Speaker 4: your husband a little bit, but at least he knows.

1122
00:53:11,520 --> 00:53:13,200
Speaker 2: I don't like that.

1123
00:53:13,520 --> 00:53:15,640
Speaker 4: Does the other guy's wife know yet?

1124
00:53:15,920 --> 00:53:16,280
Speaker 1: Yeah?

1125
00:53:16,480 --> 00:53:17,719
Speaker 4: Is she okay with important?

1126
00:53:17,920 --> 00:53:19,719
Speaker 2: That's what I'm saying, Like y'all are friends with all

1127
00:53:19,800 --> 00:53:20,160
Speaker 2: of them?

1128
00:53:20,320 --> 00:53:20,560
Speaker 6: Right?

1129
00:53:20,600 --> 00:53:22,600
Speaker 2: She Opie said that she was friends with the wife.

1130
00:53:22,760 --> 00:53:27,759
Speaker 2: I'd be devastated to learn that my friend knew that

1131
00:53:27,840 --> 00:53:30,840
Speaker 2: my partner confessed love to her, right, And then she

1132
00:53:30,880 --> 00:53:33,000
Speaker 2: didn't tell me, I'd be devastated.

1133
00:53:33,840 --> 00:53:36,000
Speaker 4: It's a hard conversation, but it needs to happen.

1134
00:53:36,560 --> 00:53:38,719
Speaker 2: Ysked if I felt the same way, which I do not,

1135
00:53:39,360 --> 00:53:41,200
Speaker 2: then asked if I was planning to hook up with

1136
00:53:41,200 --> 00:53:44,320
Speaker 2: my friend. I said no, and he said cool. Well, uh,

1137
00:53:44,360 --> 00:53:46,520
Speaker 2: I want you didn't have to tell me about all that,

1138
00:53:46,600 --> 00:53:49,280
Speaker 2: but I'm sorry you put you in that position before

1139
00:53:49,320 --> 00:53:53,200
Speaker 2: you salty people have another heyday. Yes, I was honest

1140
00:53:53,200 --> 00:53:54,480
Speaker 2: with them and told them everything.

1141
00:53:54,840 --> 00:53:55,200
Speaker 4: Okay.

1142
00:53:55,280 --> 00:53:57,680
Speaker 2: We've also discussed boundaries that both of us will be

1143
00:53:57,760 --> 00:54:01,000
Speaker 2: enforcing moving forward. The guy told me he talked to

1144
00:54:01,080 --> 00:54:02,080
Speaker 2: his wife about it.

1145
00:54:02,320 --> 00:54:03,360
Speaker 4: Good okay.

1146
00:54:03,719 --> 00:54:06,080
Speaker 2: She reached out to me, asking me out for coffee

1147
00:54:06,400 --> 00:54:09,200
Speaker 2: to discuss further, which we will be doing tomorrow. I

1148
00:54:09,280 --> 00:54:12,120
Speaker 2: don't think I'll be posting any more updates, but thank

1149
00:54:12,160 --> 00:54:15,440
Speaker 2: you to everyone who provided helpful advice. Sorry to everyone

1150
00:54:15,440 --> 00:54:18,440
Speaker 2: who has enjoyed tearing a stranger to shreds, and I

1151
00:54:18,440 --> 00:54:20,239
Speaker 2: hope your day improves significantly.

1152
00:54:20,480 --> 00:54:21,080
Speaker 4: Thanks.

1153
00:54:21,520 --> 00:54:22,960
Speaker 2: That's the end of that story.

1154
00:54:23,000 --> 00:54:25,280
Speaker 4: It's wild behavior crazy.

1155
00:54:25,360 --> 00:54:26,600
Speaker 5: I need to see if there's an update.

1156
00:54:26,760 --> 00:54:30,200
Speaker 2: I'm like kind of shocked, how there everyone in this

1157
00:54:30,320 --> 00:54:33,920
Speaker 2: freaking story has been about everything? Are y'all still friends?

1158
00:54:34,360 --> 00:54:37,319
Speaker 2: Great that he told her husband. Eventually, well, are we

1159
00:54:37,440 --> 00:54:39,680
Speaker 2: still gonna be friends with the guy who said that

1160
00:54:39,719 --> 00:54:40,799
Speaker 2: he's in rew with you?

1161
00:54:40,920 --> 00:54:42,200
Speaker 4: We're just like okay with.

1162
00:54:42,080 --> 00:54:44,920
Speaker 2: This and he's just gonna wait around until you change

1163
00:54:44,920 --> 00:54:47,440
Speaker 2: your mind. I don't understand y'all.

1164
00:54:47,520 --> 00:54:50,719
Speaker 4: And are we still talking over Snapchat? Yes?

1165
00:54:51,960 --> 00:54:53,840
Speaker 2: And are we still talking over snapchat?

1166
00:54:53,920 --> 00:54:56,080
Speaker 4: Maybe we should be switching to texting if clearly the

1167
00:54:56,120 --> 00:54:57,480
Speaker 4: photos can't be controlled.

1168
00:54:57,640 --> 00:55:01,080
Speaker 5: Yeah, I didn't want to jump to anything. Okay, there's

1169
00:55:01,080 --> 00:55:01,680
Speaker 5: no updates.

1170
00:55:01,840 --> 00:55:04,560
Speaker 2: Oh do you think it's like a swapperoo white swap.

1171
00:55:04,360 --> 00:55:04,879
Speaker 5: The white day?

1172
00:55:05,200 --> 00:55:06,920
Speaker 4: Like, oh you think the other wife is fine with it?

1173
00:55:06,920 --> 00:55:09,759
Speaker 5: And once like yes, exactly, Like no, I'm into this,

1174
00:55:10,080 --> 00:55:12,200
Speaker 5: Like we're all into this except for you.

1175
00:55:12,560 --> 00:55:13,960
Speaker 2: Yeah, she just didn't know.

1176
00:55:14,320 --> 00:55:17,200
Speaker 4: Boy man, she was into it. She didn't really seem

1177
00:55:17,200 --> 00:55:17,840
Speaker 4: that concerned.

1178
00:55:18,000 --> 00:55:20,359
Speaker 2: No, no one seemed concerned about anything. And I don't

1179
00:55:20,400 --> 00:55:22,680
Speaker 2: understand them, but I guess good for you guys. But

1180
00:55:22,719 --> 00:55:24,040
Speaker 2: we're going to get into this next story.

1181
00:55:24,120 --> 00:55:24,719
Speaker 1: Hey it's Sam.

1182
00:55:24,760 --> 00:55:25,920
Speaker 5: We're going to get back to the stories.

1183
00:55:25,920 --> 00:55:27,719
Speaker 1: But here's three minutes bads from our sponsors.

1184
00:55:28,360 --> 00:55:32,799
Speaker 4: My summer fling is married and with a family, uh oh,

1185
00:55:32,880 --> 00:55:36,960
Speaker 4: fling him away from you. And this comes directly from

1186
00:55:36,960 --> 00:55:40,279
Speaker 4: the Okay Storytime subreddit. I am traveling in Italy for

1187
00:55:40,360 --> 00:55:43,279
Speaker 4: the summer, working at a hostel in exchange for free

1188
00:55:43,320 --> 00:55:46,520
Speaker 4: accommodation and food. I will be here for a couple

1189
00:55:46,600 --> 00:55:50,319
Speaker 4: of months and have made some amazing friends and connections.

1190
00:55:50,880 --> 00:55:54,040
Speaker 4: By the way, this comes from Okay membership seventy seventy

1191
00:55:54,200 --> 00:55:55,440
Speaker 4: And if you want us to meet your own stories,

1192
00:55:55,480 --> 00:55:57,200
Speaker 4: go to the r slash Okay storytime subreddit.

1193
00:55:57,280 --> 00:56:01,000
Speaker 6: I'm Carly, I'm Sophia, and I'm Keon, and we're here

1194
00:56:01,040 --> 00:56:03,560
Speaker 6: to give good advice goofully, but we don't have all

1195
00:56:03,560 --> 00:56:04,200
Speaker 6: the answers.

1196
00:56:04,320 --> 00:56:07,120
Speaker 4: We only know what we do, So let us know

1197
00:56:07,160 --> 00:56:09,760
Speaker 4: what you would do in the comments. And op says

1198
00:56:10,400 --> 00:56:13,080
Speaker 4: anyone who has been to Italy knows that if you

1199
00:56:13,200 --> 00:56:15,879
Speaker 4: are a beautiful woman, you will get looked at by

1200
00:56:16,040 --> 00:56:21,080
Speaker 4: so many men, including married men holding hands with their partners. Okay,

1201
00:56:21,239 --> 00:56:23,040
Speaker 4: I haven't been there Italy.

1202
00:56:23,080 --> 00:56:26,879
Speaker 2: It's like just really for most women, it's just they're

1203
00:56:26,920 --> 00:56:29,359
Speaker 2: like they just shout at you as you're walking by,

1204
00:56:29,600 --> 00:56:32,759
Speaker 2: and they're like beautiful, like one chawbela, yeah, yeah, and

1205
00:56:32,800 --> 00:56:34,960
Speaker 2: like where are you from? Well, like me and my

1206
00:56:35,000 --> 00:56:37,080
Speaker 2: friend when we were there, like we're walking, He's like,

1207
00:56:37,080 --> 00:56:39,040
Speaker 2: where are you from? And we don't respond, where are

1208
00:56:39,080 --> 00:56:41,719
Speaker 2: you from? And we're like Jesus. And then when I

1209
00:56:41,760 --> 00:56:44,480
Speaker 2: was in a club in Italy, some like like grabbed

1210
00:56:44,560 --> 00:56:47,080
Speaker 2: my arm and I was like no, and he was

1211
00:56:47,160 --> 00:56:49,319
Speaker 2: like trying to talk to me and I was like no,

1212
00:56:50,239 --> 00:56:50,920
Speaker 2: and they got to push it.

1213
00:56:51,000 --> 00:56:54,440
Speaker 5: Yeah, so they're they aren't forward in Italy, forward in Italy,

1214
00:56:55,000 --> 00:56:55,600
Speaker 5: chow Bela.

1215
00:56:55,760 --> 00:56:58,719
Speaker 4: I am from the United States, so I am absolutely

1216
00:56:58,719 --> 00:57:01,600
Speaker 4: clueless about the culture here. And this is my main

1217
00:57:01,640 --> 00:57:04,759
Speaker 4: reason for posting, because I need advice from people who

1218
00:57:04,880 --> 00:57:08,040
Speaker 4: understand this culture. Maybe you guys can Underson.

1219
00:57:08,320 --> 00:57:11,080
Speaker 2: I don't know if I understand the culture, but I'll.

1220
00:57:10,640 --> 00:57:15,919
Speaker 4: Give that much poet. I met a man who owned

1221
00:57:15,920 --> 00:57:18,760
Speaker 4: a restaurant near my hostel, and I have been eating

1222
00:57:18,800 --> 00:57:21,480
Speaker 4: there three or more times a week because the food

1223
00:57:21,560 --> 00:57:25,200
Speaker 4: was incredible and the price was amazing. The owner started

1224
00:57:25,200 --> 00:57:28,080
Speaker 4: giving me free food because I was returning so often,

1225
00:57:28,600 --> 00:57:31,560
Speaker 4: and it blossomed into a really nice friendship between me

1226
00:57:31,640 --> 00:57:34,360
Speaker 4: and his staff. He would invite me to private dinners

1227
00:57:34,880 --> 00:57:37,720
Speaker 4: with his staff in the back, and I bonded with

1228
00:57:37,800 --> 00:57:39,600
Speaker 4: all of them. To the point where I have all

1229
00:57:39,640 --> 00:57:43,560
Speaker 4: their contacts on WhatsApp, a much more reasonable app than Snapchat.

1230
00:57:43,680 --> 00:57:45,600
Speaker 2: I mean, everyone uses that when you're bad.

1231
00:57:46,120 --> 00:57:48,200
Speaker 4: I can't lie when I say I really liked the

1232
00:57:48,280 --> 00:57:52,200
Speaker 4: owner beyond friends, and he looked young enough that I

1233
00:57:52,240 --> 00:57:54,720
Speaker 4: didn't think he would have a wife and kids, maybe

1234
00:57:54,720 --> 00:57:57,440
Speaker 4: a girlfriend. But this guy looked like he was in

1235
00:57:57,520 --> 00:58:00,600
Speaker 4: his mid to late twenties. I'm twenty two. Although I

1236
00:58:00,720 --> 00:58:03,640
Speaker 4: never asked, he was always flirting with me in front

1237
00:58:03,680 --> 00:58:07,280
Speaker 4: of everyone, so I assumed he was single. Bad assumption.

1238
00:58:07,520 --> 00:58:09,560
Speaker 4: I know, I'm a dumb American.

1239
00:58:09,760 --> 00:58:10,080
Speaker 2: Lol.

1240
00:58:10,440 --> 00:58:12,680
Speaker 4: He asked me out on a date a month ago

1241
00:58:13,000 --> 00:58:16,120
Speaker 4: and I said yes immediately after knowing him for a week.

1242
00:58:16,560 --> 00:58:18,880
Speaker 4: Very soon for me, but some of the girlfriends I

1243
00:58:18,920 --> 00:58:21,760
Speaker 4: have met in the hospital told me this is slow

1244
00:58:21,880 --> 00:58:25,640
Speaker 4: for an Italian man. I'm not sure, but I decided

1245
00:58:25,680 --> 00:58:28,280
Speaker 4: to take things very slow. The dates we went on

1246
00:58:28,360 --> 00:58:31,760
Speaker 4: were magical, and I am not delusional. I saw him

1247
00:58:31,800 --> 00:58:35,080
Speaker 4: as a summer fling, but that didn't stop feelings from

1248
00:58:35,120 --> 00:58:38,880
Speaker 4: creeping in. We went to Spas, the beach, small beautiful

1249
00:58:38,920 --> 00:58:42,840
Speaker 4: towns outside of Florence, and many lovely excursions, but we

1250
00:58:42,960 --> 00:58:46,520
Speaker 4: never went anywhere private until yesterday. First of all, I

1251
00:58:46,560 --> 00:58:49,480
Speaker 4: didn't want to go anywhere private, and I know Italian

1252
00:58:49,520 --> 00:58:52,320
Speaker 4: men can be quick to want intimacy, but he was

1253
00:58:52,400 --> 00:58:55,400
Speaker 4: the opposite. We had been intimate a few times in

1254
00:58:55,480 --> 00:58:58,880
Speaker 4: locations I don't want to talk about, but intimacy is

1255
00:58:58,920 --> 00:59:02,000
Speaker 4: incredibly personal to me because I had only had it

1256
00:59:02,080 --> 00:59:05,200
Speaker 4: four times before him. Second, I'm staying in a six

1257
00:59:05,280 --> 00:59:09,280
Speaker 4: bed hostel room. Yeah, so I was not inviting anyone

1258
00:59:09,360 --> 00:59:11,520
Speaker 4: over and I never wanted to go over to his

1259
00:59:11,680 --> 00:59:13,000
Speaker 4: place for my own safety.

1260
00:59:13,080 --> 00:59:15,520
Speaker 2: I just want to say real quick, Yeah, people in

1261
00:59:15,600 --> 00:59:18,560
Speaker 2: hostels are crazy. I never had an experience.

1262
00:59:18,680 --> 00:59:21,840
Speaker 5: Sometimes I've made some great friends through hostel Oh no.

1263
00:59:21,840 --> 00:59:24,840
Speaker 2: No, To be clear, I had across the board excellent

1264
00:59:24,960 --> 00:59:27,800
Speaker 2: experiences in hostels. I don't I'm not saying that everyone

1265
00:59:27,800 --> 00:59:29,000
Speaker 2: in a hostel is crazy.

1266
00:59:28,760 --> 00:59:29,840
Speaker 4: But I've heard a lot of hostels.

1267
00:59:29,960 --> 00:59:32,640
Speaker 2: But and this never happened to me personally. I have

1268
00:59:32,760 --> 00:59:36,400
Speaker 2: like long term friends still from hostels. But my friend,

1269
00:59:36,560 --> 00:59:39,680
Speaker 2: this long term friend told me that in one of

1270
00:59:39,720 --> 00:59:42,360
Speaker 2: the hostels that she was staying in, someone was having

1271
00:59:42,400 --> 00:59:44,240
Speaker 2: a minels flaw.

1272
00:59:44,520 --> 00:59:45,400
Speaker 1: In the room.

1273
00:59:45,680 --> 00:59:46,160
Speaker 5: That's crazy.

1274
00:59:47,000 --> 00:59:48,880
Speaker 2: There are people, I was going to say, I was

1275
00:59:48,920 --> 00:59:49,160
Speaker 2: going to.

1276
00:59:49,160 --> 00:59:51,560
Speaker 5: Say, not the Minaja Twa, but there were people in

1277
00:59:51,680 --> 00:59:53,720
Speaker 5: our hostel who were doing it in the room. It

1278
00:59:53,760 --> 00:59:55,480
Speaker 5: was the last night for us for our group, but

1279
00:59:55,480 --> 00:59:57,720
Speaker 5: we were like, did everyone hear that last night? Did

1280
00:59:57,760 --> 00:59:59,920
Speaker 5: everyone sleep okay? And everyone's like no, we all woke

1281
00:59:59,920 --> 01:00:01,520
Speaker 5: go y yeah.

1282
01:00:01,240 --> 01:00:04,760
Speaker 2: Yeah, No. People think they're sneaky. There's a curtain separating it.

1283
01:00:04,800 --> 01:00:05,960
Speaker 5: I think they're definitely into it.

1284
01:00:06,160 --> 01:00:09,160
Speaker 4: Yeah, that was a big red flag I now realize,

1285
01:00:09,200 --> 01:00:11,960
Speaker 4: but at the time I didn't ask many questions about

1286
01:00:11,960 --> 01:00:15,040
Speaker 4: his personal life. His English is not great, so it's

1287
01:00:15,080 --> 01:00:19,120
Speaker 4: hard to engage in deep conversations on to what happened yesterday.

1288
01:00:19,600 --> 01:00:22,080
Speaker 4: He asked me to come over to his apartment after work.

1289
01:00:22,360 --> 01:00:24,960
Speaker 4: I agreed and we went there. When we arrived, it

1290
01:00:25,000 --> 01:00:28,800
Speaker 4: was a gorgeous place with lots of beautiful greenery and flowers.

1291
01:00:29,080 --> 01:00:31,720
Speaker 4: I immediately asked him why he never invited me over,

1292
01:00:32,240 --> 01:00:34,640
Speaker 4: since I make it very obvious to everyone I meet

1293
01:00:34,720 --> 01:00:38,080
Speaker 4: that I love gardens and nature. He brushed that comment

1294
01:00:38,120 --> 01:00:40,680
Speaker 4: off by saying he wanted to take me out to explore.

1295
01:00:41,120 --> 01:00:44,040
Speaker 4: When we got inside, it was everything I expected for

1296
01:00:44,120 --> 01:00:48,240
Speaker 4: a young restaurant owner, beautifully decorated, not rich by any means,

1297
01:00:48,320 --> 01:00:51,960
Speaker 4: but definitely not cheap either. He took me upstairs and

1298
01:00:52,040 --> 01:00:57,920
Speaker 4: I immediately saw children's toys and froze. No. I asked

1299
01:00:57,960 --> 01:01:00,800
Speaker 4: him whose toys they were, and he did not hesitate

1300
01:01:00,840 --> 01:01:04,880
Speaker 4: to tell me he has children, which it's not I

1301
01:01:04,920 --> 01:01:06,320
Speaker 4: could divorce.

1302
01:01:06,720 --> 01:01:11,040
Speaker 2: Yeah so true, or just yeah find out. I was shocked.

1303
01:01:11,200 --> 01:01:14,560
Speaker 4: Once again. I don't know anything about Italian culture, but

1304
01:01:14,800 --> 01:01:17,880
Speaker 4: it came as a surprise because neither he nor anyone

1305
01:01:17,920 --> 01:01:20,600
Speaker 4: from the restaurant had ever mentioned his kids to me.

1306
01:01:20,960 --> 01:01:23,439
Speaker 4: I asked him if he has a wife, and once

1307
01:01:23,480 --> 01:01:26,480
Speaker 4: again he did not lie to me. I was in

1308
01:01:26,560 --> 01:01:29,480
Speaker 4: tears immediately and told him to take me home.

1309
01:01:29,960 --> 01:01:33,640
Speaker 7: Yikes. He really was just like. She was like, do

1310
01:01:33,720 --> 01:01:36,720
Speaker 7: you have kids? Who was like, she was like, do

1311
01:01:36,800 --> 01:01:41,840
Speaker 7: you have a wife? He's like me, is that not obvious?

1312
01:01:41,320 --> 01:01:42,600
Speaker 7: That's crazy?

1313
01:01:42,760 --> 01:01:45,680
Speaker 4: And I'm not from Italy, but I feel like that

1314
01:01:45,760 --> 01:01:46,400
Speaker 4: is still bad.

1315
01:01:46,920 --> 01:01:47,800
Speaker 2: It is still bad.

1316
01:01:49,640 --> 01:01:51,760
Speaker 4: I don't think that's an Italian culture thing. I think

1317
01:01:51,880 --> 01:01:56,120
Speaker 4: that's still cheating, he said, and I quote, why go home?

1318
01:01:56,360 --> 01:01:59,080
Speaker 4: She is gone for ten months, so it doesn't matter.

1319
01:01:59,520 --> 01:02:01,760
Speaker 4: As I can kept crying. I told him how wrong

1320
01:02:01,800 --> 01:02:04,600
Speaker 4: it was to do everything he did, spending money on me.

1321
01:02:04,720 --> 01:02:07,320
Speaker 4: That should be going to his wife and kids and

1322
01:02:07,600 --> 01:02:10,920
Speaker 4: doing things his wife would most likely dislike. He showed

1323
01:02:10,960 --> 01:02:13,520
Speaker 4: me to his bedroom for tissues, and that's when I

1324
01:02:13,600 --> 01:02:17,720
Speaker 4: saw her. A wedding picture on the wall with a

1325
01:02:17,760 --> 01:02:22,040
Speaker 4: butcher was there. Yeah, gorgeous Iranian woman who looked like

1326
01:02:22,080 --> 01:02:25,439
Speaker 4: she could be a model. I'm a beautiful, blonde young

1327
01:02:25,480 --> 01:02:29,280
Speaker 4: woman with tattoos, but this woman was seriously breathtaking, me

1328
01:02:29,400 --> 01:02:32,680
Speaker 4: beautiful and is way prettier than me. I continue to

1329
01:02:32,680 --> 01:02:35,560
Speaker 4: ask him many questions about his wife, kids and why

1330
01:02:35,640 --> 01:02:38,720
Speaker 4: he never told me. We both started using translators at

1331
01:02:38,720 --> 01:02:41,280
Speaker 4: this point because the language barrier made it hard for

1332
01:02:41,360 --> 01:02:44,360
Speaker 4: him to understand me. Here is everything I asked. Why

1333
01:02:44,360 --> 01:02:46,640
Speaker 4: wouldn't your wife be upset about you having another woman?

1334
01:02:46,960 --> 01:02:50,040
Speaker 2: Jess the mother? I have a children and nothing more.

1335
01:02:50,800 --> 01:02:53,280
Speaker 4: Why would you cheat on your beautiful wife when I

1336
01:02:53,320 --> 01:02:54,560
Speaker 4: am half as beautiful?

1337
01:02:54,840 --> 01:02:58,480
Speaker 2: She is as ugly than you know. This photo was

1338
01:02:58,880 --> 01:03:00,880
Speaker 2: from the Bibe years ago.

1339
01:03:02,040 --> 01:03:04,560
Speaker 4: That doesn't make it okay to sheat But how would

1340
01:03:04,600 --> 01:03:05,600
Speaker 4: she feel about this?

1341
01:03:05,800 --> 01:03:08,160
Speaker 2: She and I never see Chather.

1342
01:03:09,040 --> 01:03:12,360
Speaker 4: We have kids together, then shouldn't you be spending your

1343
01:03:12,400 --> 01:03:14,000
Speaker 4: money on your kids and not me.

1344
01:03:15,280 --> 01:03:16,600
Speaker 2: About my children?

1345
01:03:17,200 --> 01:03:20,160
Speaker 4: At my job How did you expect me to be

1346
01:03:20,240 --> 01:03:20,960
Speaker 4: okay with this?

1347
01:03:21,480 --> 01:03:23,800
Speaker 2: If you want to go, we gonna go.

1348
01:03:25,080 --> 01:03:28,760
Speaker 4: At this point, I was in full flowing tears and

1349
01:03:28,960 --> 01:03:30,840
Speaker 4: he took me back to the hospital.

1350
01:03:31,480 --> 01:03:33,360
Speaker 2: I don't know how to do an Italian accent.

1351
01:03:34,360 --> 01:03:34,680
Speaker 1: Wow.

1352
01:03:34,960 --> 01:03:38,400
Speaker 2: Yeah, this guy is so not apologetic. He's like, I

1353
01:03:38,440 --> 01:03:46,320
Speaker 2: don't know, she's just my wife. She is you can go.

1354
01:03:46,560 --> 01:03:48,800
Speaker 2: I can't do that either. Yeah.

1355
01:03:48,880 --> 01:03:50,000
Speaker 4: I think he just sucked.

1356
01:03:50,200 --> 01:03:51,320
Speaker 2: Yeah, I know, he just sucks.

1357
01:03:51,400 --> 01:03:52,439
Speaker 4: Is an Italian thing.

1358
01:03:52,680 --> 01:03:54,680
Speaker 2: I mean, you've only known him for a little bit.

1359
01:03:55,360 --> 01:03:58,000
Speaker 2: Is really sucky situation that he puts you in. If

1360
01:03:58,040 --> 01:04:00,240
Speaker 2: you can find a way to tell his wife this.

1361
01:04:00,200 --> 01:04:03,160
Speaker 5: Is not your fault. I think he just cut him off.

1362
01:04:03,160 --> 01:04:06,600
Speaker 5: This was a learning, you know situation. Now, you know,

1363
01:04:06,640 --> 01:04:08,760
Speaker 5: when you meet a guy, double check. I'm like, hey,

1364
01:04:08,760 --> 01:04:10,120
Speaker 5: do your kids see your family?

1365
01:04:10,280 --> 01:04:10,480
Speaker 4: You know?

1366
01:04:10,640 --> 01:04:12,800
Speaker 2: Yeah, I've told the story on the pond, but to

1367
01:04:12,840 --> 01:04:15,720
Speaker 2: a much lesser extent. I was in London with Sam

1368
01:04:16,200 --> 01:04:18,920
Speaker 2: a couple of years ago and we met these Belgian

1369
01:04:18,960 --> 01:04:20,640
Speaker 2: boys and one of them was like flirting with me

1370
01:04:20,680 --> 01:04:23,880
Speaker 2: all night and we exchanged Instagrams and he's like, do

1371
01:04:23,880 --> 01:04:25,560
Speaker 2: you want to like hang out? Because I was only

1372
01:04:25,560 --> 01:04:26,600
Speaker 2: there for a week, He's like, do you want to

1373
01:04:26,600 --> 01:04:28,440
Speaker 2: hang out on these other day? And I look at

1374
01:04:28,440 --> 01:04:31,200
Speaker 2: his Instagram and the first thing him and a girl,

1375
01:04:31,480 --> 01:04:33,120
Speaker 2: and I'm like looking through it, I'm like, I think

1376
01:04:33,160 --> 01:04:34,640
Speaker 2: he has a girlfriend. And I tell Sam, I'm like,

1377
01:04:34,680 --> 01:04:36,160
Speaker 2: I think he has a girlfriend. He's like, well, you

1378
01:04:36,160 --> 01:04:38,120
Speaker 2: don't know that, like, don't assume blah. And I'm like, no,

1379
01:04:38,120 --> 01:04:40,000
Speaker 2: I think he has a girlfriend. So I just kind

1380
01:04:40,000 --> 01:04:42,720
Speaker 2: of like respond nicely, but I'm like, oh, I can't,

1381
01:04:42,920 --> 01:04:46,640
Speaker 2: I can't hang out. Sorry. And then months later I

1382
01:04:46,680 --> 01:04:49,840
Speaker 2: get a request from a random girl and I am

1383
01:04:49,920 --> 01:04:51,520
Speaker 2: like looking at it and like I see the little

1384
01:04:51,520 --> 01:04:53,640
Speaker 2: blurb of the message, and I accept. And it's basically

1385
01:04:53,760 --> 01:04:56,520
Speaker 2: her being like what happened with you and this boy?

1386
01:04:57,400 --> 01:05:00,120
Speaker 2: Or like my boyfriend did anything? Like did he do anything?

1387
01:05:00,160 --> 01:05:02,480
Speaker 2: Did you guys look up blah blah blah, And I'm like,

1388
01:05:02,560 --> 01:05:05,680
Speaker 2: nothing happened, but he did truck. I just said, like

1389
01:05:05,960 --> 01:05:08,680
Speaker 2: I only met him once, uh, and nothing happened.

1390
01:05:08,760 --> 01:05:11,400
Speaker 4: I also liked that he was like she's old and

1391
01:05:11,680 --> 01:05:14,120
Speaker 4: uglier now and at the beginning we found out they

1392
01:05:14,160 --> 01:05:16,080
Speaker 4: were like mid to late twenties.

1393
01:05:16,240 --> 01:05:17,840
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm like, there's no way that this girl is

1394
01:05:17,880 --> 01:05:19,400
Speaker 2: not like still gorgeous.

1395
01:05:19,520 --> 01:05:22,440
Speaker 4: Yeah, we didn't speak a word on the ride home,

1396
01:05:22,680 --> 01:05:26,200
Speaker 4: but he said sorry, you feel so bad as I

1397
01:05:26,200 --> 01:05:29,840
Speaker 4: got out of this car. I have no idea what

1398
01:05:29,920 --> 01:05:33,640
Speaker 4: to do. I'm incredibly distraught, not for myself but for

1399
01:05:33,720 --> 01:05:37,120
Speaker 4: the children and wife, who are most likely clueless to

1400
01:05:37,200 --> 01:05:40,880
Speaker 4: this whole situation. I witnessed my mother's affair as a

1401
01:05:41,040 --> 01:05:43,800
Speaker 4: very young child and was forced to keep it a

1402
01:05:43,840 --> 01:05:47,440
Speaker 4: secret until my mom left my dad for her affair partner.

1403
01:05:48,120 --> 01:05:51,240
Speaker 4: This is really eating at me. I was five when

1404
01:05:51,280 --> 01:05:53,920
Speaker 4: that all happened, and I assume his kids are that

1405
01:05:54,080 --> 01:05:57,440
Speaker 4: age or younger. So I feel completely distraught about this

1406
01:05:57,640 --> 01:06:01,640
Speaker 4: entire situation. Advice is needed because I am so uneducated

1407
01:06:01,680 --> 01:06:04,880
Speaker 4: on Italian culture in this aspect and have no idea

1408
01:06:04,880 --> 01:06:06,600
Speaker 4: what to do. I get the end of that.

1409
01:06:06,600 --> 01:06:09,280
Speaker 2: Story again if you can figure out a way to

1410
01:06:09,320 --> 01:06:12,240
Speaker 2: tell his wife, but otherwise just block, move on, don't

1411
01:06:12,320 --> 01:06:13,160
Speaker 2: see this guy again.

1412
01:06:13,240 --> 01:06:15,840
Speaker 4: Hopefully the comments were already telling you that that's not

1413
01:06:16,040 --> 01:06:16,800
Speaker 4: it's not your fault.

1414
01:06:16,880 --> 01:06:19,680
Speaker 5: I think you're also you were like so enamored into

1415
01:06:19,720 --> 01:06:23,600
Speaker 5: the culture and the city itself that you're.

1416
01:06:23,400 --> 01:06:25,320
Speaker 2: Like, I mean, this can happen anywhere, it.

1417
01:06:25,280 --> 01:06:28,400
Speaker 5: Can happen anywhere Italian thing exactly.

1418
01:06:28,480 --> 01:06:31,600
Speaker 2: But we've got some comments from another video. My sister

1419
01:06:31,680 --> 01:06:34,360
Speaker 2: wants to steal my mom's house and this was posted

1420
01:06:34,400 --> 01:06:38,120
Speaker 2: September eighteenth, twenty twenty five, and the TLDR says Opie's

1421
01:06:38,120 --> 01:06:40,960
Speaker 2: sister has always been clear she doesn't like babies and

1422
01:06:41,000 --> 01:06:45,520
Speaker 2: won't babysit, but his wife kept pushing her boundaries anyway.

1423
01:06:45,720 --> 01:06:48,400
Speaker 2: When their babysit are canceled last minute for a fancy

1424
01:06:48,440 --> 01:06:52,200
Speaker 2: dinner reservation, Opie's wife demanded the sister watch the five

1425
01:06:52,200 --> 01:06:54,840
Speaker 2: month old and freaked out when she said no. Things

1426
01:06:54,880 --> 01:06:57,480
Speaker 2: exploded when OPI left at eleven PM to take his

1427
01:06:57,560 --> 01:07:00,479
Speaker 2: sister to the hospital for an emergency, and his wife

1428
01:07:00,520 --> 01:07:04,520
Speaker 2: woke up furious that he helped someone who won't help them.

1429
01:07:04,680 --> 01:07:07,360
Speaker 2: Now she's threatening to leave him unless he completely cuts

1430
01:07:07,400 --> 01:07:10,520
Speaker 2: off his sister, and OPI is stuck between his wife's

1431
01:07:10,600 --> 01:07:14,800
Speaker 2: ultimatum and his family loyalty. And if you're curious to

1432
01:07:14,840 --> 01:07:16,920
Speaker 2: know the full story, you can go watch the full video.

1433
01:07:17,240 --> 01:07:20,000
Speaker 2: And we have some comments from that story. And I

1434
01:07:20,040 --> 01:07:21,120
Speaker 2: do remember that one as well.

1435
01:07:21,200 --> 01:07:24,640
Speaker 5: Common Number one. I think it's by Jody or Yody Yodel,

1436
01:07:25,000 --> 01:07:26,960
Speaker 5: just because you have a baby, doesn't mean others have

1437
01:07:27,000 --> 01:07:29,360
Speaker 5: to babysit. Others don't have to do anything for you

1438
01:07:29,440 --> 01:07:32,040
Speaker 5: if they don't want to. And the sister may be

1439
01:07:32,160 --> 01:07:35,080
Speaker 5: very uncomfortable being responsible for a baby and doesn't know

1440
01:07:35,080 --> 01:07:37,400
Speaker 5: what to do if it's crying, and it could be

1441
01:07:37,480 --> 01:07:39,320
Speaker 5: dangerous to leave a baby with a person that doesn't

1442
01:07:39,360 --> 01:07:41,480
Speaker 5: want to take care of it. This whole thing is

1443
01:07:41,600 --> 01:07:44,960
Speaker 5: crazy to me. The baby's mom maybe having postpartum depression,

1444
01:07:45,000 --> 01:07:47,120
Speaker 5: which may be why she is having a hard time

1445
01:07:47,200 --> 01:07:50,040
Speaker 5: understanding the sister's point of view and why she is

1446
01:07:50,080 --> 01:07:53,480
Speaker 5: so upset about it. She should seek treatment, agreed.

1447
01:07:53,840 --> 01:07:57,280
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean, you can't force anyone who is not

1448
01:07:57,440 --> 01:08:02,040
Speaker 2: the parent to babysit your child. Not their responsibility. If

1449
01:08:02,040 --> 01:08:04,360
Speaker 2: you can't find a person to watch a kid so

1450
01:08:04,400 --> 01:08:05,920
Speaker 2: you can go on your fancy dinner date, then you

1451
01:08:05,960 --> 01:08:07,160
Speaker 2: can't go on your fancy dinner day.

1452
01:08:07,240 --> 01:08:07,400
Speaker 5: Yeah.

1453
01:08:07,400 --> 01:08:09,160
Speaker 4: I think they're coming with them. Come on.

1454
01:08:09,240 --> 01:08:11,320
Speaker 5: I think we need to plan a little bit better there.

1455
01:08:11,520 --> 01:08:13,480
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean in this case, I think it was

1456
01:08:13,560 --> 01:08:16,920
Speaker 2: just like person canceled, Yeah, last minute.

1457
01:08:16,280 --> 01:08:19,519
Speaker 5: But I think you always need a plan by yeah,

1458
01:08:19,640 --> 01:08:20,440
Speaker 5: or a plane.

1459
01:08:20,720 --> 01:08:22,600
Speaker 4: You at least can't assume that your plan B is

1460
01:08:22,600 --> 01:08:24,120
Speaker 4: the one that said no already.

1461
01:08:24,240 --> 01:08:26,440
Speaker 2: Yeah, why said I never want a babysit.

1462
01:08:26,080 --> 01:08:28,800
Speaker 5: Your kids always have a couple other plans after a

1463
01:08:29,600 --> 01:08:32,120
Speaker 5: We have a second comment here by the Sharona ten.

1464
01:08:32,680 --> 01:08:35,120
Speaker 5: They say it boggles my mind when parents insist of

1465
01:08:35,200 --> 01:08:38,320
Speaker 5: leaving their kids with someone who does not want to

1466
01:08:38,360 --> 01:08:38,960
Speaker 5: be around them.

1467
01:08:39,240 --> 01:08:41,439
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, it doesn't seem like I don't know why.

1468
01:08:41,479 --> 01:08:43,960
Speaker 2: Yeah the kids, I got that fun. No, it's gonna

1469
01:08:43,960 --> 01:08:44,639
Speaker 2: be pretty obvious.

1470
01:08:44,840 --> 01:08:48,439
Speaker 5: And another comment here is like Chris through Glass, I'm

1471
01:08:48,439 --> 01:08:51,360
Speaker 5: not a kid slash baby person. I would never watch

1472
01:08:51,360 --> 01:08:53,920
Speaker 5: a baby if it wasn't or isn't an emergency. I

1473
01:08:53,960 --> 01:08:55,920
Speaker 5: didn't know how to change a diaper, how to feed

1474
01:08:55,920 --> 01:08:58,360
Speaker 5: a baby, how to hold it, how is it supposed

1475
01:08:58,400 --> 01:09:00,880
Speaker 5: to lie, how warm it has to be, how much

1476
01:09:00,880 --> 01:09:03,679
Speaker 5: crying is normal, et cetera. That's their comment. Yeah, that's fair.

1477
01:09:04,400 --> 01:09:06,559
Speaker 2: Into watching the pay so much that goes into watching

1478
01:09:06,560 --> 01:09:08,280
Speaker 2: a baby. And if you just don't know how to

1479
01:09:08,320 --> 01:09:11,160
Speaker 2: do that and never wanted to learn, yeah, tricky.

1480
01:09:11,640 --> 01:09:16,320
Speaker 5: And a last comment here by Taylor Keechu forty six

1481
01:09:16,400 --> 01:09:19,120
Speaker 5: eighty three. As somebody who's child free, this stuff gets

1482
01:09:19,120 --> 01:09:22,400
Speaker 5: so tiring. So many people are convinced you just never

1483
01:09:22,439 --> 01:09:24,639
Speaker 5: want to be around children or their children could change

1484
01:09:24,640 --> 01:09:27,880
Speaker 5: your mind. I personally do not hate kids. I just

1485
01:09:27,920 --> 01:09:30,600
Speaker 5: don't want them around all the time. I love my

1486
01:09:30,680 --> 01:09:33,880
Speaker 5: nieces and nephews, including my friend's kiddos, I just have

1487
01:09:33,960 --> 01:09:36,519
Speaker 5: never felt the want for them, and I'm even happier

1488
01:09:36,560 --> 01:09:38,840
Speaker 5: with that decision as I get older. I also I

1489
01:09:38,840 --> 01:09:41,400
Speaker 5: am not comfortable holding you borns. I don't hold them

1490
01:09:41,439 --> 01:09:44,080
Speaker 5: until they're three months old because they are less fragile

1491
01:09:44,080 --> 01:09:44,400
Speaker 5: by then.

1492
01:09:44,880 --> 01:09:48,439
Speaker 2: Lowell, Yeah, everyone's got different desires and you know, plans

1493
01:09:48,479 --> 01:09:50,320
Speaker 2: for the life, and you can't force your plan on

1494
01:09:50,400 --> 01:09:53,640
Speaker 2: someone else exactly. But those are the ends of the

1495
01:09:53,640 --> 01:09:56,160
Speaker 2: comments and that is the end of the episode. So

1496
01:09:56,439 --> 01:09:58,400
Speaker 2: if you love us, make sure to subscribe.

1497
01:09:58,479 --> 01:10:01,080
Speaker 4: We love you and see you tomorrow.