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Speaker 1: Dating questions? Me giving dating advice? Yes, me giving stay

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Speaker 1: in relationship and choose a good, viable partner for the

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Speaker 1: long haul. No. Can people give advice that are not

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Speaker 1: good at the thing themselves? Yes? Did I write a

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Speaker 1: book called I Suck at Relationships so you don't have to? Yes?

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Speaker 1: So can I get a guy? Can I get the

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Speaker 1: guy bag, the guy bag, the elephant? Yes? Have men

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Speaker 1: bought me gorgeous gifts and worshiped me and treated me

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Speaker 1: like a princess and wanted to marry me over and

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Speaker 1: over and over again. Am I good in bed? Yes?

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Speaker 1: Doesn't mean I'm an expert. Doesn't mean I'm giving stay

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Speaker 1: married for thirty years advice that is not me. You

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Speaker 1: can ask me, but you'd be a fool. But it

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Speaker 1: also doesn't mean that a person who can do it themselves,

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Speaker 1: or hasn't been able to do it themselves, or is

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Speaker 1: blind when it comes to themselves can't give advice. Thank you,

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Speaker 1: you're welcome. Is it ever okay to text your ex's

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Speaker 1: new girlfriend asking for a friend. No, this is psychotic,

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Speaker 1: This is sociopath This is insane, This is giving disperado

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Speaker 1: mental No, how do you know the difference between love

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Speaker 1: bombing and actual enthusiasm. It's disproportionate to what's going on.

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Speaker 1: You first meet someone, they're a stranger. After the first date,

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Speaker 1: they're still a stranger. After the third date, they're an acquaintance.

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Speaker 1: Doesn't matter if their penis has been inside your vagina.

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Speaker 1: You still don't know them. You don't know how they operate, function, morals, values, kids, therapy, money, politics, parents,

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Speaker 1: where they're going to live, private school or public all

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Speaker 1: the things. Okay, no, you don't know. So they are

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Speaker 1: a stranger. So if there is a disproportionate way that

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Speaker 1: they are doting on you, assigning to you, you need

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Speaker 1: to know it. And you could be a love bomber.

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Speaker 1: You could be a love bomb receiver. You could love

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Speaker 1: it because you're so needy and desperate and in a

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Speaker 1: low point and insecure that you just want to absorb it.

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Speaker 1: But it's not real and it won't work. It has

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Speaker 1: to be layered in and you have to get to

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Speaker 1: a certain age to realize this. So learn from other

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Speaker 1: people's mistakes, because I've been there, and you want someone

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Speaker 1: and like them and they're hot and whatever, and it

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Speaker 1: crashes and it burns because it's not based on reality.

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Speaker 1: It is frosting, no cake. It is a house with

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Speaker 1: gorgeous drapes and no foundation. You cannot get to a

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Speaker 1: trusting place with someone until you get to a trusting

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Speaker 1: place with someone. So yes, in the beginning, you would

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Speaker 1: be infatuated. You could have the oxytocin, you could have

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Speaker 1: the endorphins going, all of it. But no, it is

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Speaker 1: not real. You don't need to put twenty five pounds

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Speaker 1: of shit in a five pound bag and do everything

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Speaker 1: right away. If a guy says he's emotionally unavailable, he's

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Speaker 1: not interested in you at this time. You can't change that.

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Speaker 1: That will not change now. If he met the right person,

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Speaker 1: he'd become completely emotionally available. So piece the fuck out,

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Speaker 1: Do not go for scraps. Do not be a beggar.

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Speaker 1: You could be in love with him. Keep it to yourself.

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Speaker 1: Look hot, glow up, do what you gotta do. If

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Speaker 1: he wants you, he'll find you. Do not waste time.

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Speaker 1: Do I think ghosting is worse than bread crumbing. No,

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Speaker 1: ghosting is better than bread crumbing. When he's feeling low

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Speaker 1: and he texts you, he knows that you're still there,

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Speaker 1: right there, nipping at the bottom of the hook to

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Speaker 1: the little piece of bread because you're a desperado. You

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Speaker 1: do not tolerate bread crumbing whatsoever. You know what the

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Speaker 1: ironic thing is, you get bread crumbed, you ghost and

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Speaker 1: I don't know what coward behavior is. Ghosting is usually

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Speaker 1: based on something where the guy doesn't owe you anything

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Speaker 1: you decided. He owes you something you decided because you

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Speaker 1: made out with him, because that night was fun, because

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Speaker 1: you decided to sleep with him with your body and

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Speaker 1: your choice, which is difficult, so difficult that it's hard

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Speaker 1: for me to tell my daughter and her friends how

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Speaker 1: to navigate this in the future because adults have a

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Speaker 1: problem with it. That being said, just because you did

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Speaker 1: something doesn't mean someone owes you something. If you've been

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Speaker 1: dating someone for three months and they don't call you

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Speaker 1: one day, they are a sociopath. But ghosting is overused

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Speaker 1: by people who are sad that someone didn't act the

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Speaker 1: way that they wanted them to act, based on false

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Speaker 1: promises when you were drinking, when you were out, when

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Speaker 1: everyone was feeling the fantasy of we're going to have

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Speaker 1: this together, We're going to do that. Oh my god,

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Speaker 1: let's go there, let's go. I want you to meet

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Speaker 1: my mom we're going to do it. Yes, we should

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Speaker 1: go there together. None of it's true. None of it's true.

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Speaker 1: So you have to wait, You have to be patient,

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Speaker 1: you have to stick with it, and something can become something,

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Speaker 1: but you cannot rush what it is. And in the

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Speaker 1: very beginning, the person is a stranger. And if they

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Speaker 1: don't call you because they were super nice to you

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Speaker 1: and pretended they were in love with you, it isn't

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Speaker 1: really ghosting. It's the fact that they're a man. It's

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Speaker 1: the fact that they're immature. It's the fact that they

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Speaker 1: were feeling it in the moment and they change their

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Speaker 1: mind the next day. It's the fact that they have

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Speaker 1: five other things going. It's the fact that they're good

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Speaker 1: compartmentalizers and they can easily have an affair and with

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Speaker 1: their wife act like they're madly in love and the

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Speaker 1: best family guy ever, because they're super charming, and they

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Speaker 1: can say to you on a date night out, how

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Speaker 1: beautiful you look and how they can't wait to get

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Speaker 1: together with you and have Fourth of July plans and

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Speaker 1: meet your parents, and then the next day they can

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Speaker 1: forget you ever existed. They're missing an emotional chip that

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Speaker 1: we have, so breadcrumbing and ghosting both suck, but know

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Speaker 1: the definition of both and tolerate none. But ghosting is ghosting.

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Speaker 1: It's over. Someone doesn't talk to you, they don't want

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Speaker 1: to talk to you. Someone wants to talk to you,

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Speaker 1: they want to talk to you. That's so easy. You

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Speaker 1: put a pair of shoes on, it doesn't fit, it

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Speaker 1: gives you blisters, Do not buy it. Toss it to

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Speaker 1: the side or at your house. You wear them and

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Speaker 1: it rubs and it hurts. Get rid of it. Somebody

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Speaker 1: is not acting in a way that's absolutely rational and normal.

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Speaker 1: Piece the fuck out, or if you're at a certain point,

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Speaker 1: you can express yourself on a confident, secure way what

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Speaker 1: you will or won't tolerate. Let's see what they do.

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Speaker 1: That's completely mature. That's not immature. Just to sit there

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Speaker 1: and like wait to see. Oh, but he did, but

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Speaker 1: he texted me. But he did do that. He brought

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Speaker 1: me one flower last time, though, so it's weird that

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Speaker 1: he's not. It's not weird. He could bring you one flower.

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Speaker 1: He can also ghost you. None of this is weird.

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Speaker 1: And also, there are many selfish pieces of shit out there,

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Speaker 1: so don't assume somebody something that you assign on them.

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Speaker 1: They could all be pieces of shit. You could be

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Speaker 1: dating five pieces of shit at the same time. So

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Speaker 1: dump the pile of shit and hopefully you'll get one

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Speaker 1: good fish on the line. Men in their fifties are

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Speaker 1: they're a different breed of dating. Okay, I've been through

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Speaker 1: all the errors of dating sadly, but truly, men in

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Speaker 1: their fifties fit into two categories. Okay, one is bread crumbing.

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Speaker 1: They bread crumb. They like you, They send messages, they

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Speaker 1: want penpals. They lob a call, not a call. There's

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Speaker 1: never a call. They're like infants with calling. They've completely

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Speaker 1: lost their entire sense of communication skills because they have

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Speaker 1: been married, they've been working the corporate ladder. They've had

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Speaker 1: to deal with their kids and activities and vacations and

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Speaker 1: the sports and the wife and the this, and like

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Speaker 1: all they do is just like run on the same

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Speaker 1: program all the time. They're almost like robots. They're in

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Speaker 1: the same whole program, and they don't have any capability

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Speaker 1: of working to communicate or connect because they've totally disconnected.

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Speaker 1: Presumably their wives have done everything, handled everything, and they

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Speaker 1: just really have like disconnected emotionally, so they have no

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Speaker 1: ability to date and really like connect on any version

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Speaker 1: of an emotional level. And I've seen this with like

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Speaker 1: ten guys. And so they'll send you a text, hey,

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Speaker 1: how are you doing. You're like, I'm doing great, how

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Speaker 1: are you? And then you may not hear from them again,

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Speaker 1: and then there could be like a little back and

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Speaker 1: forth and then you might see them. But it's like

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Speaker 1: they literally want pempals and you have to tell them

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Speaker 1: to get the fuck out of here, and they won't

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Speaker 1: even notice if you did. They won't even notice if

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Speaker 1: you ignore them. They won't be like, is everything okay?

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Speaker 1: Because they're disconnected. They don't care. They're fucking bread crumbers,

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Speaker 1: and it's so for the birds. The bread crumbs are

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Speaker 1: for the birds, okay. But the other men in their

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Speaker 1: fifties trait and habits being a love bomber. They're insecure

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Speaker 1: pussies who have also been married and their relationship people.

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Speaker 1: They need to be in a relationship. So the minute

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Speaker 1: they meet you, if they like you at all, they

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Speaker 1: want to chea, pet you and take you to a

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Speaker 1: ten and like all of a sudden, you're instant relationship.

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Speaker 1: But like nothing that's actually gone on has supported that

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Speaker 1: you're already in a relationship. Like it's like they want

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Speaker 1: to put the frosting on the cake when there's no cake.

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Speaker 1: They want to put the drapes on the house when

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Speaker 1: there's no foundation to the house. Like what are you doing?

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Speaker 1: Why are you facetiming met after us meeting one night

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Speaker 1: and connecting? Like why are you facetiming me with no clothes?

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Speaker 1: Why are you sending me a picture of yourself every day?

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Speaker 1: And why are you sending me pictures of your kids?

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Speaker 1: Why you saying high beautiful be Why are you saying

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Speaker 1: how gorgeous my eyes are? I don't fucking know you.

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Speaker 1: You're a stranger and you're freaking me out. And the

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Speaker 1: ick is at a twenty and the bread crumb is ick. Also,

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Speaker 1: it's just a different The bread crumb is fuck you,

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Speaker 1: the love bomb is dick. I don't care. I'd rather

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Speaker 1: be single for the rest of my life than date

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Speaker 1: a breadcrumber or a pen pallor get out of here.

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Speaker 1: So the other thing about Lauren and Jeff Bezos as

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Speaker 1: far as dating, is like he who makes the gold,

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Speaker 1: makes the rules, he's running the program, like he's the

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Speaker 1: one who has the public company, the hundreds of billions

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Speaker 1: of dollars. And while a woman having a certain amount

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Speaker 1: of power in a relationship and holding in many cases

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Speaker 1: the sexual bank account, the relationship to a big billionaire,

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Speaker 1: powerhouse guy has to be I've spoken to enough people

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Speaker 1: about this has to be that the woman has made

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Speaker 1: him her king. It's really his program. There are some

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Speaker 1: categories that she gets to be in charge of, but

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Speaker 1: ultimately he's the king. He's in charge. Don't fucking forget

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Speaker 1: it for a minute, okay, And you have to sort

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Speaker 1: of be in that role. There is a role that

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Speaker 1: you're performing in because he's the big swinging dick and

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Speaker 1: she has to travel with him, be there, support him,

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Speaker 1: treat him like a king, and that has to be

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Speaker 1: something that would be okay with you. And I don't

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Speaker 1: think that I would be good at that. You know,

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Speaker 1: I would not be good at being a member of

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Speaker 1: the royal family. I would not be good at being

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Speaker 1: with a billionaire type that like has to be in

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Speaker 1: control and it's his program and we're like just traveling

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Speaker 1: around and my kids have to get on the program

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Speaker 1: and I just have to like do what he wants

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Speaker 1: me to do, and not in a controlling way. He

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Speaker 1: could be a lovely, wonderful person. It could be the

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Speaker 1: greatest life of all time, and it could be the

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Speaker 1: best program ever, by the way, But you know, the

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Speaker 1: best program, ladies, is our own and you make your

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Speaker 1: own money and you get to make your own rules.

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Speaker 1: So that's just something that I've noticed in these types

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Speaker 1: of dynamics. In meeting enough sports team owners wives, in

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Speaker 1: meeting enough billionaires wives, they all tell me there are

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Speaker 1: many rules that they really need to abide by because

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Speaker 1: of the public nature of their husband's businesses, and they

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Speaker 1: can't just say what they want. They're not allowed to

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Speaker 1: be outspoken. They kind of have to play by a

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Speaker 1: rule book, a playbook, and I don't think that I'd

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Speaker 1: be very good at that. So the other day I

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Speaker 1: did a post about men in their fifties, basically saying

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Speaker 1: that they are the worst era to date. And I've

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Speaker 1: been through all the eras except for like the ninety

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Speaker 1: eighty and seventy or one hundred. But the fifties, men

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Speaker 1: have been married, have made a little dough, have a job,

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Speaker 1: a career, have like I said, some money, work out,

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Speaker 1: they've had a glow up like Jeff Bezos adjacent. They

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Speaker 1: might have a sports car, they have children. They've been

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Speaker 1: used to being married and planning trips and transacting and

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Speaker 1: being doctor hero by going in the morning to the

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Speaker 1: sports practices or going on the weekend to the club volleyball.

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Speaker 1: And they think they're mister Dad, et cetera, because they're

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Speaker 1: good dads and they're very involved dads. But their wives

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Speaker 1: have done mostly everything in the relationship and taken care

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Speaker 1: of most things, and the men have been in like

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Speaker 1: the Austin Powers freezer. They've been frozen in time and

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Speaker 1: they have no ability to emotionally connect. So they want

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Speaker 1: a fucking pen pal. So they lob in these texts,

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Speaker 1: how's your day, how's it going, love to see you,

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Speaker 1: want to get together, blah blah blah. But then you

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Speaker 1: either get together or you're just texting with them, and

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Speaker 1: they want a fucking pen pal. They lobbed the call.

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Speaker 1: You respond in a very normal way like I'm doing great,

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Speaker 1: how are you? And then you could like not from

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Speaker 1: them for a couple of hours, or you could go

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Speaker 1: out with them and not hear from them for a

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Speaker 1: couple of days. And I had shown my friend like

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Speaker 1: ten examples of this, like ten examples of very engaged,

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Speaker 1: interested people in their fifties that just check the fuck

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Speaker 1: out and dissolve like a balloon floating, and they think

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Speaker 1: that we think they're hot shot cool. Like it's one

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Speaker 1: thing if you're like a bro in your thirties doing that,

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Speaker 1: and that's different, Like you're kind of sleeping with a

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Speaker 1: girl and you get drunk and you have fun and

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Speaker 1: like you're that dick. But like being your fifties, people

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Speaker 1: are like, are you an infant? Do you suck your thumb?

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Speaker 1: You fucking loser, Like we think they're the biggest losers.

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Speaker 1: And after I posted a post about this, women like

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Speaker 1: and women on TV and famous women and normal women

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Speaker 1: and men and famous men and men that I know

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Speaker 1: and men that I've dated, reached out in droves, Like

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Speaker 1: I got so many texts like wait, I think this

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Speaker 1: is me? Or is this me? Or I'm not like that?

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Speaker 1: Such defensiveness. One man, Hey, how you doing? Are you

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Speaker 1: in X City? And I'm like, no, I'm not, How

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Speaker 1: are you anyway? Are you texting me as a single

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Speaker 1: man or a merryman? Dissolve Like there's that too, that's

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Speaker 1: the scumbag adjacent version, But like these guys are losers

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Speaker 1: and they think we think they're cool. And the guy

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Speaker 1: that sent it to me and said he thought it

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Speaker 1: was him, who is like a good looking guy and

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Speaker 1: his successful guy. I said to him, no, we don't

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Speaker 1: think you're cool. We think you're losers, and we want

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Speaker 1: to piece the fuck out. And we also only tolerate

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Speaker 1: it for a certain period of time because we're bored too,

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Speaker 1: and we're like not dealing with it. But the minute

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Speaker 1: we realize or we have something better, we're piecing the

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Speaker 1: fuck out because we think you're losers also, And you

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Speaker 1: are hanging out with those girls who are dangling there

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Speaker 1: waiting for a Chanelle bag. You don't even realize that

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Speaker 1: you don't respect those women. How could you respect a

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Speaker 1: woman who's willing to accept a pen pal? Like? What

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Speaker 1: do better? I guarantee Laurence Sanchez didn't accept a pen pal.

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Speaker 1: And the other one is a love bomber. That's the

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Speaker 1: other needy motherfucker that's in their fifties. It's the opposite.

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Speaker 1: That's the guy who also has been in a relationship

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Speaker 1: and been married and is sucking his thumb and so

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Speaker 1: needy because he can't be alone for a minute. Someone

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Speaker 1: has dealt with everything for him and whether he was

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Speaker 1: cheating or not. He liked the feeling of just having

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Speaker 1: someone for the holidays when he felt low. When you know,

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Speaker 1: it's the scraps, it's the Sunday night, it's after the

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Speaker 1: golf game, it's after he's dehydra he doesn't feel well,

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Speaker 1: he's played golf and he wants someone to cook him

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Speaker 1: a meal, or he's hung over and he just wants

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Speaker 1: to lay in bed and like treat his wife nicely,

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Speaker 1: or it's the vacation, or like I said, you know

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Speaker 1: that shit. That guy then clings on to the next

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Speaker 1: person in a disproportionate way to what's going on. That's

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Speaker 1: the guy that will look just out of nowhere just

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Speaker 1: FaceTime you when you didn't even like agree to, like, Hi,

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Speaker 1: I'm facetiming you now, would you like to FaceTime someone

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Speaker 1: just lobbing in a facetiming you out of your fucking mind,

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Speaker 1: you sociopath. Or they're sending you pictures of them like

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Speaker 1: shirtless pictures are in a bathing suit, or pictures of

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Speaker 1: their kids when you basically don't even know them. You're like,

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Speaker 1: you're a love bomber weirdo. That's strange too. We don't

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Speaker 1: trust that you're so beautiful you're stunning, or like, what

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Speaker 1: do you have a fever you coming town with like

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Speaker 1: fucking bird flu. Relax, I'm a woman over fifty. Like,

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Speaker 1: I'm not stunning. Take it easy. I look pretty good,

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Speaker 1: but relax with the fucking staggeringly stunning