Speaker 1: Episode four forty eight influencers are lying to you about
Speaker 1: their lifestyle.
Speaker 2: Welcome to the Frugal Friends podcast, where you'll learn to
Speaker 2: save money, embrace simplicity, and liver your life. Here your
Speaker 2: hosts Jen and Jill.
Speaker 1: Welcome to Frugal Friends Podcast. My name is Jen, my
Speaker 1: name is Jill, and today news flash. Yeah, influencers are
Speaker 1: not telling you the truth on social media, so we're
Speaker 1: gonna dive it's not malicious. I like to assume it's
Speaker 1: not malicious, but we will talk about why they're doing it.
Speaker 1: We will talk about how to identify it and then
Speaker 1: make your own decisions on whether you are influenced by
Speaker 1: it or not.
Speaker 3: You have a softer place in your heart for marketing
Speaker 3: than I do, so well, you'll probably get a flavor
Speaker 3: of that throughout.
Speaker 1: I think there are a lot of great influencers out
Speaker 1: there with a lot of great intentions and hacks and
Speaker 1: things they want to teach people. And I also think
Speaker 1: there are the opposite sure, so I want to not
Speaker 1: generalize all of it is bad, but inform people how
Speaker 1: to think for themselves.
Speaker 3: Absolutely. But first, this episode is brought to you by
Speaker 3: the whole truth, not straight up lies or even partial truths. Nope,
Speaker 3: We're giving you the whole truth about the best place
Speaker 3: to put your emergency fund, and that's in a high
Speaker 3: YELD savings account, one that gives you an annual percentage
Speaker 3: yield of say four point sixty five percent, and nothing
Speaker 3: less Like ciit, who is offering just that. Go to
Speaker 3: frugal friendspodcast dot com slash ciit to open your account,
Speaker 3: start putting money in there, start earning four point sixty
Speaker 3: five percent back on that money. APY, back on that
Speaker 3: money to experience the whole glorious truth about how amazing
Speaker 3: it is when your money makes money.
Speaker 1: And the whole truth is that there is probably a
Speaker 1: time limit on this APY. The FED just lowered rates
Speaker 1: by half a percent, and so that will result in
Speaker 1: a lot of HIGHILD savings accounts lowering their APY. So
Speaker 1: if you're thinking about starting an extra HIGHILD savings account,
Speaker 1: or just your first one in general, you should do
Speaker 1: that immediately and capitalize as much on these high rates
Speaker 1: as we can. So frugal friendspodcast dot com slash c
Speaker 1: there is some urgency to this now, yes, and that's
Speaker 1: the whole truth.
Speaker 3: So we asked you all in the friend letter for
Speaker 3: those of you who are subscribed to that. For those
Speaker 3: of you who aren't, it's a free newsletter three times weekly.
Speaker 3: We give you all sorts of goodies Frugal friendspodcast dot com.
Speaker 3: We asked you all how often do you buy something
Speaker 3: because you saw someone online talking about it or just
Speaker 3: having it, And the majority of you did say rarely,
Speaker 3: it rarely happens. But then the rest of you said
Speaker 3: about one time a month or maybe a few times
Speaker 3: a year. Yeah, so this is happening.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean everyone said that some you know, rarely
Speaker 1: isn't never, right, so there were there was not an
Speaker 1: option for never, but I.
Speaker 3: Wouldn't believe other people they said never never.
Speaker 1: Uh so, but I think there there's two sides to
Speaker 1: this coin, right, Like, as frugal people, we can often
Speaker 1: be very judgmental at people who are influenced to buy
Speaker 1: things on social media. And on the other hand, people
Speaker 1: who are influenced like once a month or several times
Speaker 1: a year or maybe even more can feel really guilty
Speaker 1: about it and say and label themselves I'm easily influenced.
Speaker 1: I'm influenced by anything, And that's a label we want
Speaker 1: you to take off yourself, no matter how many times
Speaker 1: you're buying something from social media because the way people
Speaker 1: are influencing it's intentional, it's backed with psychology, and so
Speaker 1: it's not that you are easily influenced, though you can
Speaker 1: increase your aptitude to be more resilient against that, but
Speaker 1: it's not a label. It's not you inherently being easily influenced.
Speaker 1: Resisting social media influencing is a skill that you can learn,
Speaker 1: just like spending, just like what we teach in our
Speaker 1: book Buy what you Love without going broke at buy
Speaker 1: what youlovebook dot com. Shamus, right, So this is something
Speaker 1: that you can learn. So whether you are somebody who
Speaker 1: never does this and you're just here for the salacious
Speaker 1: title to find out how influencers are lying to you.
Speaker 3: Don't worry, you will get what you came for.
Speaker 1: Or you're somebody who is easily influenced and you feel
Speaker 1: some shame about that. Take that label off and I
Speaker 1: think you'll get a lot out of this episode.
Speaker 3: Agreed.
Speaker 1: So first we want to introduce you. We usually start
Speaker 1: out with a article, but we want to introduce you
Speaker 1: to a YouTuber because really, these YouTube videos were the
Speaker 1: inspiration for this episode. Her name is Hannah Alonso, and
Speaker 1: honestly I follow her for her anti MLM content. So
Speaker 1: if you are an anti MLM junkie and you love
Speaker 1: anti MLM like spicy.
Speaker 3: Or you or you're not, you don't know about MLMs
Speaker 3: and some of the darker sides elacious, yeah, and maybe
Speaker 3: why it's important to think twice thrice about participating in
Speaker 3: an MLM or purchasing through MLMs. This would also be
Speaker 3: a helpful resource to understand a little more.
Speaker 1: So that's why I subscribe to her. But she started
Speaker 1: this year doing a series on influencer insanity because she saw,
Speaker 1: just like all of us, how influencer marketing is just
Speaker 1: draining us of our disposable income and it is increasing
Speaker 1: our impulse spending at a higher rate than I think
Speaker 1: any other form of marketing. And it's progressed from this
Speaker 1: like you know, sponsored content, brand deal sort of thing,
Speaker 1: into a more I would say it's definitely a little darker.
Speaker 1: It's capitalizing on on our almost like our inferiority are
Speaker 1: not inferiority, like our feelings of inadequacy, that's the word,
Speaker 1: our feelings of inadequacy to buy solutions to problems that
Speaker 1: are fabricated they're manufactured and essentially solutions can't be bought,
Speaker 1: and so she does these. She has about ten of
Speaker 1: them out, but we're going to talk about episodes one
Speaker 1: and four specifically.
Speaker 3: Yeah, so episode one of Hannah Alonso's YouTube channel within
Speaker 3: this vein of kind of debunking what it is about
Speaker 3: influencers that we should just be aware of and the
Speaker 3: ways in which we can't trust implicitly. This one's titled
Speaker 3: the Unhinged Consumerism of Restock Influencers So unrealistic and shows
Speaker 3: all different types of restock influencers. One of the things
Speaker 3: that I do appreciate about Hannah's approach in these videos
Speaker 3: is recognizing that, or at least stating it's not her
Speaker 3: goal to rip apart these specific influencers, but to look
Speaker 3: at the underlying trends, what's happening, what's being supported or encouraged,
Speaker 3: and how we can be equipped to push back against that,
Speaker 3: not necessarily the individual influencer, but against the trend itself
Speaker 3: and maybe what it might be stirring inside of us.
Speaker 3: But she does say there can be room to appreciate
Speaker 3: some of the beauty that we see in these videos.
Speaker 3: Maybe the satisfaction of seeing organized drawers and things perfectly restocked,
Speaker 3: but to also enjoy that while realizing it's not real life.
Speaker 3: It is one hundred percent curated for social media consumption.
Speaker 3: It is therefore your viewing pleasure and for the creator
Speaker 3: to make money from the sponsors and the products that
Speaker 3: they're showing. So these restock of ice drawers, the restock
Speaker 3: of your pantry. There was even a restock of a
Speaker 3: junk drawer video, which is absolutely the most unrelatable restock. Yeah.
Speaker 1: Well, they're capitalizing on the fact that these are very
Speaker 1: low cost items. So we've got the the we've all
Speaker 1: seen some kind of restock video, so like ice drawer,
Speaker 1: Like these individual silicone molds are not that expensive. Of course,
Speaker 1: you're not going to spend two hundred dollars on all
Speaker 1: of the ice molds. But this is a thirty second
Speaker 1: to one minute clip displaying like twenty seven ice molds
Speaker 1: in the hopes that everyone watching will just buy one,
Speaker 1: and that's very profitable for the creator, and people will
Speaker 1: be mad about it, so they'll comment more on it,
Speaker 1: like who's going to spend all this money on all
Speaker 1: these things? And that's never the goal of the.
Speaker 3: Video.
Speaker 1: The video is a little bit rage baby, and then
Speaker 1: also in hopes of if you just buy one ten
Speaker 1: dollars product out of the ten to twenty they've pictured,
Speaker 1: then that was worth it for them. And so we
Speaker 1: love to watch these. They're like esthetically pleasing, but knowing
Speaker 1: that that's the goal of these. It's not to get
Speaker 1: you to buy everything or drink fridge, thinking that, oh wow,
Speaker 1: a drink fridge is a really great idea. That's cool,
Speaker 1: I should get one of those, Like you could just
Speaker 1: buy a drink fridge and not get any of the
Speaker 1: organizing things or the wasteful plastic, all the single use cans,
Speaker 1: and like they've made their money back on that video tenfold, And.
Speaker 3: So that's the It is so extreme, and like we've
Speaker 3: talked about in the past, we can be drawn to extremes.
Speaker 3: And and I will say I do enjoy some of
Speaker 3: those those restocking of the ice. They're they're just pleasing.
Speaker 3: I love hearing the.
Speaker 1: Ice like clings to all the restocks have this like
Speaker 1: ASMR component.
Speaker 3: Right, But I think I'm not even fully aware of
Speaker 3: all the other ways that it is kind of infiltrating
Speaker 3: my mindset and what I think is normal. So even
Speaker 3: while I could watch that and know, I Am not
Speaker 3: going to buy a separate freezer to just have ice in.
Speaker 3: I don't even like ice that much. But what it's
Speaker 3: doing to normalize this level of luxury, and how over time,
Speaker 3: as I see more and more of this, how much
Speaker 3: I might end up assuming they're a good amount of
Speaker 3: people who do these things, who have who make these
Speaker 3: special drinks, and they have these parties and they're making
Speaker 3: all this different ice, and they're restocking their drawers and
Speaker 3: they always have what they need, and like you said, Jen,
Speaker 3: kind of those feelings of an adequacy that I think
Speaker 3: it's cumulative. It's not an entire all at once type
Speaker 3: of impact. It's this over time that I think is
Speaker 3: important for us to keep a pulse on, because we
Speaker 3: are now, with the rise of social media, being exposed
Speaker 3: to things that we didn't even know could exist or
Speaker 3: know to even desire. And so what it's creating in
Speaker 3: us of the things that we want, whether or not
Speaker 3: we can actually attach it to a specific social media video,
Speaker 3: but recognizing the whole of it, the whole of watching
Speaker 3: these people live luxurious, insanely over consuming lifestyles. What will
Speaker 3: that end up doing to us if we're not aware
Speaker 3: of this reality and some of the underlying current and
Speaker 3: the mindset that it could lead to. Similar to arming
Speaker 3: ourselves with understanding of marketing tactics so we can push
Speaker 3: back against impulse purchases. Same thing here, Recognizing the realities
Speaker 3: of influencing culture and these insane extreme over consumption, luxurious lifestyles,
Speaker 3: what it's eventually eroding in us, and how we can
Speaker 3: be just more mindful.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and I think Hannah does a really great job
Speaker 1: of wrapping up all these videos and really highlighting the
Speaker 1: danger in them in how it glorifies the perfect esthetic,
Speaker 1: this thing that people should be striving for to get
Speaker 1: to the income bracket where you can have a freezer
Speaker 1: just for ice, and a separate drink fridge and a
Speaker 1: curated a fridge scaped fridge with all these different kind
Speaker 1: of plastic containers. It's this aspiration thing that a gets
Speaker 1: us to, little by little, you know, by one thing
Speaker 1: at a time, to try and piecemeal together this whole
Speaker 1: set that was curated in an Instagram video or a
Speaker 1: TikTok video. But it also it reinforces those feelings of
Speaker 1: inadequacy and not enough and gives the idea that other
Speaker 1: people are doing this. There's so many of these restocking videos.
Speaker 1: They have become so popular, and influencers are capitalizing on that.
Speaker 1: It's not that we see all these videos so everyone
Speaker 1: must be doing it. It is just a social media
Speaker 1: influencer thing because of how profitable it is, because of
Speaker 1: how viral it is, because it has the esthetic and
Speaker 1: that ASMR component. That's what gets people to watch it,
Speaker 1: and so of course influencers are going to flock to
Speaker 1: what's working. But the Hannah does a really good job
Speaker 1: of re like re emphasizing that the majority of people
Speaker 1: are not doing this. Yeah, like the majority of people.
Speaker 1: We have a normal looking fridge, white black, stainless steel whatever.
Speaker 1: We've got normal looking countertops, no bins in our fridge.
Speaker 1: The only ice is from the ice maker in the
Speaker 1: drawer in the door or in the plastic container. Yeah,
Speaker 1: you know, two plastic containers of ice that store. We
Speaker 1: don't have a guest bathroom maurice stock because we don't
Speaker 1: have guests because we have too many children, you know.
Speaker 3: Like, yeah, that I mean speaking of the ways in
Speaker 3: which we come across lies, or at least miss lee
Speaker 3: information and lifestyles. If it if it looks too good
Speaker 3: to be true. It is too good to be true.
Speaker 3: I think often we don't allow ourselves to kind of
Speaker 3: think beyond the video too much because we're just over
Speaker 3: consuming our social media content. But even that one restock
Speaker 3: of ice, it wasn't an elaborate kitchen that this person
Speaker 3: was in. They opened their one cabinet, it was full
Speaker 3: of all of the syrups, and then they put all
Speaker 3: of the ice into their freezer drawer in their kitchen.
Speaker 3: You know that's not how they live life like. I
Speaker 3: don't even have to do a deep dive on their
Speaker 3: lifestyle to know that that is a very misleading video there.
Speaker 3: If it doesn't work for me to give an entire
Speaker 3: cabinet to all syrups, it doesn't work for her.
Speaker 1: And it doesn't work.
Speaker 3: For me to give my entire freezer drawer to ice,
Speaker 3: it doesn't work for her. What she's doing is pulling
Speaker 3: everything out, putting the syrups into the cabinet, making it
Speaker 3: look like it's all there because she was paid by
Speaker 3: the syrup company to do this and make it look
Speaker 3: like her entire kitchen is dedicated to ice making, and
Speaker 3: you know it's not. Is a very average the middle
Speaker 3: class kitchen. And if it looks like there's no way
Speaker 3: you could live this way, there's no way she's living
Speaker 3: this way.
Speaker 1: And I will tell you when I record videos for
Speaker 1: social media. Even so, my at home, my podcasting setup
Speaker 1: is I share an office with my eighteen month old,
Speaker 1: so my background it's his office too.
Speaker 3: It's off too.
Speaker 1: We go, yeah, well we share. I don't work when
Speaker 1: he's in there. Oh yeah, we really do trade off.
Speaker 1: But the background if I am recording, is a crib
Speaker 1: and a dresser that has eighteen thousand stickers on it,
Speaker 1: and that's that's it. So if I am doing a
Speaker 1: podcast that I know has a big YouTube following, I'll
Speaker 1: bring my setup into the kitchen onto the kitchen counter
Speaker 1: and have my dining table be the backdrop. And I
Speaker 1: have to move all the stuff on the counter, put
Speaker 1: it right in front of me, and then move all
Speaker 1: the stuff on the table onto the bench so it's
Speaker 1: all still there but you just can't see it. So
Speaker 1: and then everything that's in that in that video, I
Speaker 1: just move it out of the way. That's what everyone's doing. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's everyone doing.
Speaker 3: So it's out of frame.
Speaker 1: You're seeing five percent if that, of of what's really
Speaker 1: going on. That leads us to the next video of
Speaker 1: Hannah's that we want to talk about, which is my
Speaker 1: favorite and it was the true inspiration for this episode.
Speaker 3: Such a deep dive. I got lost in this video.
Speaker 1: Catching influencers lying about their lifestyle.
Speaker 3: And she was.
Speaker 1: Inspired by one video and she plays it at the
Speaker 1: top of the video, and it's about a woman in
Speaker 1: I think New York City. It's like what I spend
Speaker 1: in a day. And we love these as personal finance creators,
Speaker 1: we love these videos.
Speaker 3: Yeah, a stay at home mom with no.
Speaker 1: No budget, right, no budget in New York City, and
Speaker 1: so she is doing this. It's supposed to be an extreme, right,
Speaker 1: extremes go viral. So it's what I spend in a day,
Speaker 1: no budget, big money sort of video. That's what she's
Speaker 1: going for. She's going for the virality. And Hannah noticed
Speaker 1: she's showing the receipts to all these places she went
Speaker 1: in a quote unquote day, and they're all from different
Speaker 1: days because the date and time is on the receipt
Speaker 1: and even if it was one of those days, is
Speaker 1: the day she's talking about. She said that she went
Speaker 1: to Costco I think, our wholesale store in the morning,
Speaker 1: like after breakfast, you know, which is typically around what
Speaker 1: eleven twelve, I don't know, whatever time you eat breakfast.
Speaker 1: The receipt said six pm. So like even the times
Speaker 1: were a lie.
Speaker 3: Right, Yeah, the days were a lie, The times were
Speaker 3: a lie. The whole timeline was a lie. And in
Speaker 3: some ways you could think, okay, whatever, she's just stringing
Speaker 3: together a story. But the whole story was what I
Speaker 3: spend in a day, and so it wasn't an accurate picture.
Speaker 3: Maybe it would have been more accurate what I spend
Speaker 3: in a week the stores that I visit. But so
Speaker 3: much of what we're being fed is so that they
Speaker 3: can gain the virality of these videos. And so to
Speaker 3: recognize that it's not it's not accurate, it's for the
Speaker 3: benefit of the person posting it or the benefit of
Speaker 3: the company that is sponsoring these videos. And again to
Speaker 3: be so aware of the impact that it's having on us,
Speaker 3: to think that this is accurate, what that's going to
Speaker 3: make us believe we should or shouldn't be doing, when
Speaker 3: in reality they're not doing it either. They just want
Speaker 3: you to watch it, and they want the likes and
Speaker 3: they want the money.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and these posts specifically are. They're not typically sponsored
Speaker 1: by anybody. They're not to get you to buy something
Speaker 1: off of that. They're to go viral, get more followers
Speaker 1: from the oh, I want to live vicariously through this
Speaker 1: quote unquote rich person follow so that subsequent videos can
Speaker 1: sell you things like the restocks do. Yeah, so that's
Speaker 1: another even if it's not directly like and so many
Speaker 1: people are showing up in our feeds now that we
Speaker 1: don't follow, like it's almost worse, Like I wish I
Speaker 1: saw more of the people that I followed versus every
Speaker 1: other post is someone I don't follow, and it's these
Speaker 1: viral videos and these are before you click follow on someone,
Speaker 1: or even if you don't click follow on them, if
Speaker 1: you watch it long enough, it'll keep popping up in
Speaker 1: your feed even if you don't follow the person. So
Speaker 1: being mindful of what you're watching and you can actually
Speaker 1: go like Instagram will sometimes ask you do you want
Speaker 1: to see more or less of this and just say
Speaker 1: less if that if you've decided that's not the type
Speaker 1: of person that you want to be like or mold
Speaker 1: your algorithm around, then be intentional in how you answer
Speaker 1: that question. Living vicariously only goes so far. I think
Speaker 1: it's more of like, we need to look at our
Speaker 1: own lives and our contentment there if we desire to
Speaker 1: live vicariously through these influencers that are lying about their lives.
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, I think the selling of a lifestyle is
Speaker 3: equally as dangerous in my estimation, maybe if not more
Speaker 3: than just trying to get you to buy a product.
Speaker 3: She uses another example at one point of this influencer
Speaker 3: who is giving a day in their life as part
Speaker 3: of the five Am Club and so selling this idea
Speaker 3: that they are very disciplined and rigorous in their hustle
Speaker 3: and they're getting up at five am and they're emptying
Speaker 3: the dishwasher, and they're reading a book, and they're journaling,
Speaker 3: and they're working out and they're saunaing, and it's all
Speaker 3: happening before seven am. And she Hannah took a way
Speaker 3: way deep dive into the time that the sun rises
Speaker 3: where this influencer lives, because in different parts throughout the
Speaker 3: video you see sunlight coming through the windows, and she
Speaker 3: realized where this person was. Even if they had filmed
Speaker 3: the content a month prior, the sun still would not
Speaker 3: be up until about seven am. So either this person
Speaker 3: just isn't doing it, isn't actually showing their routine. There's
Speaker 3: some sort of lie happening in all of it. That is,
Speaker 3: but it's being portrayed as if you are seeing exactly
Speaker 3: what I'm doing here in this morning. And what I
Speaker 3: think is could it could be that, Okay, they just
Speaker 3: went back and redid some of the things that they
Speaker 3: were doing throughout their day to now show us, and
Speaker 3: that I guess can be somewhat acceptable, but still a
Speaker 3: little unnerving that you're gonna lie like that. I feel
Speaker 3: like there still could be a disclaimer of this is
Speaker 3: a reenactment of a day in the life. But even
Speaker 3: more potentially malicious is he's not doing any of it
Speaker 3: and making it seem like he's this super successful, grinding
Speaker 3: type person and almost making us feel bad for not
Speaker 3: doing that. Get on my level, be better, do what
Speaker 3: I'm doing. Is the underlying message of these things, and
Speaker 3: what I think can happen with that is not just oh,
Speaker 3: you told me to buy this sauna, so I'm going
Speaker 3: to buy this sauna. But I'm not feeling great about
Speaker 3: myself as a result of feeling less then, because that's
Speaker 3: clearly what you want me to feel. Because you know,
Speaker 3: you're living a lifestyle that most people aren't, or at
Speaker 3: least projecting that you're living a lifestyle, and so that
Speaker 3: could produce in me, I need to now go buy
Speaker 3: things to feel better about myself. It might not even
Speaker 3: be connected to this guy's video, just what we do
Speaker 3: when we're feeling in that state of inadequacy less than
Speaker 3: like our lives are never going to be in order
Speaker 3: the way that other people are portraying them to be.
Speaker 3: And the financial decisions across the board that I may
Speaker 3: make as a result of these lies, manipulation, misleading content.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I think, and I think the point that Hannah
Speaker 1: makes in this video is that these influencers are willing
Speaker 1: to lie about such small, meaningless things. What else are
Speaker 1: they willing to lie about? The last two videos are
Speaker 1: super interesting. The first is a woman who is trying
Speaker 1: to get across that her husband did this like athletic competition.
Speaker 1: Was the kids were proud of him, and she said,
Speaker 1: you know, daddy didn't come in first place, he came
Speaker 1: in second. What do you think? And the kids all
Speaker 1: they took away was that Daddy's strong, you know, and
Speaker 1: that was great until it was Hannah that looked it
Speaker 1: up or somebody else. He actually got like thirty second place.
Speaker 3: Yes, he came in thirty second, bar right.
Speaker 1: Such a small difference, like it was still a really
Speaker 1: great feat like what he did even if he came
Speaker 1: in thirty second, But the influencer said second. And then
Speaker 1: the last one, this lady was making a DIY craft
Speaker 1: project and she said, we saved all our honeybears from
Speaker 1: the month to make this craft project. And it was
Speaker 1: ten honeybears, and you like they came. They came from
Speaker 1: a bag, and Hannah looked it up, and you can
Speaker 1: buy all those honey bears in that bag for twenty
Speaker 1: bucks on Amazon. So she could have just said, I
Speaker 1: bought some honeybears on Amazon to do this cool project
Speaker 1: where I put all of our paint in these honeybears
Speaker 1: so it looks like gummy bears instead of just ugly
Speaker 1: paint bottles. Right there, get the same point across, But
Speaker 1: it was just that little lie, right, you know, So
Speaker 1: if they're lying about this, if they're selling a course
Speaker 1: or a product, or they're selling something for an affiliate commission,
Speaker 1: like you just lose all trust in them, and or
Speaker 1: you should lose all trust. But It makes you think
Speaker 1: a certain way about these people. And Hannah makes fun
Speaker 1: of the honeybear one is like all our honeybears from
Speaker 1: the month, and that's like ten honey bears. Like what
Speaker 1: are you eating a cup of honey a day?
Speaker 3: Yeah? Right, there's no way someone would go through that
Speaker 3: much honey. Yeah, insane.
Speaker 1: So I think the point we've talked about these videos
Speaker 1: probably a little longer than we should have.
Speaker 3: But it's too wild, it isn't. I think it's something
Speaker 3: that needs to be unearthed more and for us to
Speaker 3: be more aware of so that we can feel more
Speaker 3: armed against some of these ways that we spend money.
Speaker 3: We don't want to be.
Speaker 1: Yeah, so let's talk about what we can do. So
Speaker 1: that's the state of the union. Now where do we
Speaker 1: go from here? And we're going to look at a
Speaker 1: an article from medium dot com about why you shouldn't
Speaker 1: fall for the fake lives of so called that the
Speaker 1: so called Instagram influencers sell. And we agree with some
Speaker 1: of it. We don't agree with all of it, but
Speaker 1: we're going to cover some of it and give our
Speaker 1: action steps like how you should process.
Speaker 3: Yeah. The article is a lot more comprehensive than what
Speaker 3: we'll cover here, but I think some of the key
Speaker 3: reasons that influencers might be, you know, misleading us and
Speaker 3: what we can do as a response. But again, I
Speaker 3: want to say that influencer perfection. Here's a qu quote
Speaker 3: from this article that I really loved. Influencer perfection is
Speaker 3: a carefully crafted illusion. And so a lot of what
Speaker 3: they are crafting, the illusion that they're selling is again
Speaker 3: because of brand deals and sponsorships. That's why a lot
Speaker 3: of them are doing it or like you said, Jen,
Speaker 3: to increase the following to eventually have brand deals and sponsorships.
Speaker 3: So for many this is a job. They are marketing,
Speaker 3: they are advertising. The whole thing is an ad and
Speaker 3: it's working because there's some degree of human connection that's happening.
Speaker 3: They may have given great tips in the past, they
Speaker 3: may be a person you great tips, you love their personality.
Speaker 3: You just connect with them, and so your your desire
Speaker 3: to purchase from them, that your desire to want to
Speaker 3: take a recommendation from them is increased in these brands
Speaker 3: and sponsor sponsorships. Know, that's why they are targeting so
Speaker 3: many influencers to sell to us, because we feel so
Speaker 3: connected to the influencers.
Speaker 1: So yeah, I would say, know that these people online
Speaker 1: are not your friends, like that's they're very nice people,
Speaker 1: but this is their job or not even job, this
Speaker 1: is their business and they're doing this for themselves to
Speaker 1: put food on their table. And so you may want
Speaker 1: to support them, and that's great. You can find ways
Speaker 1: to support them that don't cost you money and that
Speaker 1: hopefully don't like cost other people money that don't need
Speaker 1: to be spending.
Speaker 3: It, yeah, or don't cost money that you weren't already
Speaker 3: planning on spending. Yeah. Yeah, sometimes those discount codes are great.
Speaker 1: Absolutely, I like on this list that so she says
Speaker 1: she gives a very generous ratio here, but she says
Speaker 1: only ninety five percent of their lives are displayed. The
Speaker 1: remaining five percent remains hidden. And I would absolutely invert
Speaker 1: that only five percent of their lives are displayed. The
Speaker 1: other ninety five percent are for sure hidden. And so
Speaker 1: that makes me think of Nara Smith, who is the
Speaker 1: og tradwife and she makes everything from scratch. You know,
Speaker 1: her sister just comes in town and wants some bubble gum.
Speaker 1: And this is in one of Hannah's videos. I think
Speaker 1: on the she has a tradwife video, and she just
Speaker 1: happens to have the really rare, unique ingredient that makes
Speaker 1: bubblegum bubblegum, and she just whips up some bubblegum for
Speaker 1: her sister that that was planned, curated, bought those things
Speaker 1: in advance because you cannot get that ingredient at a supermarket.
Speaker 3: You have to order it online.
Speaker 1: And she's i mean a successful model outside of her
Speaker 1: Instagram presence, Like this is very much a business and
Speaker 1: very much something you should not be aspiring to. It's
Speaker 1: a TV show, is what she's doing. Many TV, many
Speaker 1: cooking shows. That's what we should really be thinking of
Speaker 1: these videos as just many HGTV shows, many cooking shows,
Speaker 1: all of this. But the collection is a season of
Speaker 1: a show, not a display of a life.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I think. Also recognizing they point out that many
Speaker 3: of the top tier influencers, the one who have the
Speaker 3: biggest following, who are portraying the most luxurious lives, many
Speaker 3: are from backgrounds of privilege. They are able to go
Speaker 3: homestead on a farm and create all this content and
Speaker 3: seeming not have any other jobs because they have trust
Speaker 3: funds because money is coming in from somewhere else. So again,
Speaker 3: if it looks too good to be true. It most
Speaker 3: likely is any of these things that we're watching if
Speaker 3: they make us feel like, why can't I do that?
Speaker 3: Why doesn't what they're saying works for them work for me?
Speaker 3: Because there's some other thing layer happening that they're not
Speaker 3: showing that we don't have access to. And so you're
Speaker 3: not you're not crazy, you're not odd, you're not the
Speaker 3: exception that it's just not working for you, are just
Speaker 3: being sold something that isn't true. And so I think
Speaker 3: with that being able to identify that this is entertainment,
Speaker 3: I can look in on some of the experiences of
Speaker 3: other people because of the access to wealth that they
Speaker 3: may have or resources that they may have that I
Speaker 3: just don't. But to also keep a pulse on is
Speaker 3: it is it entertaining me? Or is it really impacting
Speaker 3: my emotional health, my mental health, my financial health, And
Speaker 3: are there shifts that maybe I need to be making
Speaker 3: and how I'm curating my own content and consumption of
Speaker 3: that content. And that's why you and I have already said, Jen,
Speaker 3: there are great influencers to follow. I know a lot
Speaker 3: of times the advice can be get off as social media.
Speaker 3: I just don't think that's realistic, but instead choose who
Speaker 3: you follow on social media. You don't have to just
Speaker 3: let the algorithm dictate where you go in any given
Speaker 3: doom scroll session. You can choose who you're following, whose
Speaker 3: accounts you're going to, what you're picking and choosing from them,
Speaker 3: and just more mindful of the purchases that you make
Speaker 3: as a result.
Speaker 1: Yeah, So the action step for this episode, I would
Speaker 1: say is if you have done a ninety day transaction
Speaker 1: inventory yet, do one. If you have one, go back
Speaker 1: through it. Also, if Amazon is your vice, you could
Speaker 1: probably just go back through your Amazon orders, see the
Speaker 1: things that you are impulse buying, and note which influencers
Speaker 1: you're most susceptible too, and stop following them just for
Speaker 1: a season. You don't have to permanently stop following them.
Speaker 1: Stop following them for a season until you can detox,
Speaker 1: get a grasp on whatever verbiage you want to use,
Speaker 1: but get control of how social media is influencing you
Speaker 1: and how these videos are influencing you.
Speaker 3: And you can.
Speaker 1: Always go back, but for now, it may be wise
Speaker 1: to stop following the ones that have the most impact
Speaker 1: on you. I might be creating the most fomo. So
Speaker 1: that would be the action step to take away or
Speaker 1: if you already know who those are without checking your
Speaker 1: Amazon orders or ninety day transaction inventory, then you go
Speaker 1: ahead and you go on follow.
Speaker 3: I have another action step, and that would be gratitude journaling.
Speaker 3: What gratitude, The fruit of gratitude is often contentment. And
Speaker 3: when we can experience contentment, that is the armor, the shields,
Speaker 3: the barrier between us and making these impulsive decisions because
Speaker 3: influencers told us to, or feeling less then because our
Speaker 3: lives don't look as luxurious or aesthetic as somebody else.
Speaker 3: So even if you just practice this for seven days,
Speaker 3: every day try to write down five things that you're
Speaker 3: grateful for, it's actually pretty shocking the impact that that
Speaker 3: starts to have on the way we're thinking, what the
Speaker 3: rest of our day looks like. How impenetrable we can
Speaker 3: start to become to some of these other messaging So
Speaker 3: gratitude journaling and allow it to cultivate contentment in you.
Speaker 1: Are making a barrier to entry before you get on
Speaker 1: social media. Just go in your notes app and create
Speaker 1: a gratitude note and before you're able to scroll on
Speaker 1: social one thing that you are grateful for in that
Speaker 1: day or in your life. One thing, just one thing,
Speaker 1: and then you're allowed to get on social media. Just
Speaker 1: reposturing your mindset before you go into that space can
Speaker 1: make a big.
Speaker 3: Difference habit stacking. One thing I'm grateful for today is
Speaker 3: something we get to do on every single episode. Yes,
Speaker 3: the bill of the week.
Speaker 4: That's right, it's time for the best minute of your
Speaker 4: entire week. Maybe a baby was born and his name
Speaker 4: is Williams. Maybe you've paid off your mortgage, maybe your
Speaker 4: car died and you're happy to not have to pay
Speaker 4: that bill. More bills, but falo bills, bill claim. This
Speaker 4: is the bill of the week.
Speaker 5: Hi, Jen and Jill. This is Natalie calling from Denver, Colorado.
Speaker 5: I realized that listening to the most recent episode where
Speaker 5: Katherine paid off twenty seven K of student loans and
Speaker 5: a few months that I actually have a bill of
Speaker 5: the week, which is essentially a non bill. I this
Speaker 5: past week paid my last large lump sum payment towards
Speaker 5: student loans. I had about thirty five thousand dollars of
Speaker 5: student loans since June of twenty twenty three, when I
Speaker 5: got my master's in clinical mental health. Counseling, and as
Speaker 5: Jill probably knows, you don't make a ton as a
Speaker 5: free licensed therapist or really a licensed therapist in the US.
Speaker 5: But I was able to really continue my other part
Speaker 5: time job and just work really hard to finish paying
Speaker 5: off that in one year. And it feels really weird
Speaker 5: to say that I won't have massive student loan payments
Speaker 5: going out every single month and be able to like
Speaker 5: put my money towards other bills and things that I
Speaker 5: actually enjoy and want to save to tur So that
Speaker 5: is my bill of the week.
Speaker 1: Thank you go, Natalie.
Speaker 3: We are so thrilled to hear this. What a good
Speaker 3: feeling to no longer have that bill, that student loan
Speaker 3: debt hanging over you, and now all the possibilities of
Speaker 3: where you can be putting that money towards. Even though
Speaker 3: you're right, it's not gonna be a ton of money
Speaker 3: that you get to choose all the different places you
Speaker 3: can put it, but I'm so thrilled with you. Congratulations. Yeah,
Speaker 3: And if you all listening, have a bill you want
Speaker 3: to submit, if it has to do with your non
Speaker 3: bills or your bill bills or your person named bill.
Speaker 3: Frugal Friendspodcast dot com slash bill for leaving us your bill.
Speaker 3: We can't wait, And now it's time for the line around.
Speaker 1: All right, what's a popular social media trend everyone seems
Speaker 1: to love but you just don't get the hype, all
Speaker 1: of it, all of it.
Speaker 3: Oh my gosh.
Speaker 1: I don't really look at the ones. I guess I
Speaker 1: don't know the ones that I don't like, because I
Speaker 1: only the algorithm only serves me things that I tend
Speaker 1: to look at. And I will also be honest that
Speaker 1: I have deleted Instagram off of my phone for the
Speaker 1: time being, just for this season. It's a detox I
Speaker 1: take every roughly four years around October. It's just random
Speaker 1: time that I just set. So I would say, I
Speaker 1: don't know, Jill, you, what do you give me some time?
Speaker 3: I do not care for the POV trend. I just
Speaker 3: I don't get it. I mean I get it, I
Speaker 3: get what they mean point of view. I'm out here
Speaker 3: with my person and we're eating burgers. It's just it
Speaker 3: feels so silly to me and also out of context.
Speaker 3: A lot of times it'll be POV and it wouldn't
Speaker 3: make sense to have said point of view. It's just
Speaker 3: like whose point of view is it you're writing pov
Speaker 3: it just it gives me the there you go to
Speaker 3: use a term that is not from my generation, Okay,
Speaker 3: it gives me the ick.
Speaker 1: My least favorite is when people are talking to themselves
Speaker 1: when it's going back and forth and they just change
Speaker 1: their shirt and b yeah, I've done it before and
Speaker 1: it gives me the ick, so I don't do it anymore.
Speaker 1: But it is I'm like, you're how how do you
Speaker 1: record it without just cringing at yourself and cracking up?
Speaker 1: And because I'm cringing and cracking up.
Speaker 3: My exception to that one is comedians if they're doing
Speaker 3: it for a comedic, because then you're supposed to be
Speaker 3: cracking up, right, Yeah, they're plenty different characters exactly. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 3: that makes sense. Yeah, which, to be fair, that is
Speaker 3: mostly who I follow. I have a role for myself
Speaker 3: with social media and scrolling. I just scroll until I
Speaker 3: laugh and then I'm done, truly, like I just I'm
Speaker 3: I'm on there to be entertained and mostly to laugh.
Speaker 1: And I know when you finished, because you send me
Speaker 1: whatever reel that is I get.
Speaker 3: And then that is your yes, you can you guaranteed laugh,
Speaker 3: I send it and I close it. Yeah, that's so true. Yeah,
Speaker 3: I was done after that reel that I sent you
Speaker 3: so true. I love it.
Speaker 1: Thank you so much for listening. I hope this maybe
Speaker 1: gave you some insights that you are always questioning the
Speaker 1: motive for what you're seeing on social media, even with
Speaker 1: good social media influencers, Always be questioning the motive, Always
Speaker 1: be questioning what's behind the video and yeah, and then
Speaker 1: really making decisions for yourself on what you are influenced
Speaker 1: to purchase. And we love, love love reading your kind reviews,
Speaker 1: and we especially love this one from Flaggirl three twenty six.
Speaker 1: My favorite weekly podcast five stars. Frugal Friends podcast should
Speaker 1: be part of everyone's weekly routine. My husband and I
Speaker 1: try to live below our means and love learning more
Speaker 1: about frugality and investing, so this podcast is perfect for us.
Speaker 1: There's an episode for everyone because Jen and Jill are
Speaker 1: so diverse in what they talk about and who they
Speaker 1: have on the show. Please keep up the great work.
Speaker 1: You ladies are awesome.
Speaker 3: Thanks fly Girl, Wow Fly you are flying some fly words,
Speaker 3: some fly encouragement. Thank you so much, and thank you
Speaker 3: all for listening. If you are also enjoying this show,
Speaker 3: We would be so honored if you would give us
Speaker 3: a moment to leave a rating and review. It really
Speaker 3: helps us. It helps new listeners find this show to
Speaker 3: know what it's all about. And we are just indebted
Speaker 3: to you for that very free thing you can do
Speaker 3: to help us.
Speaker 1: Yes, we will see you next time. Frugal Friends is
Speaker 1: produced by Eric Sirianni.
Speaker 3: Jen. Have you ever lied? Yes? No, you want to
Speaker 3: come clean about it now. I want to clear the air,
Speaker 3: give us the whole truth, no one of my yeah,
Speaker 3: oh wow, okay. Have you ever lied to me? Oh?
Speaker 3: I don't know.
Speaker 1: I mean, I don't want to say no, just in
Speaker 1: case I have and I don't remember.
Speaker 3: Because you wouldn't want to lie about that. You wouldn't
Speaker 3: want to lie about having lied. No, I wouldn't.
Speaker 2: I don't know.
Speaker 3: I have to think about it.
Speaker 1: Maybe you've lied to me though I can see no, no, no, no, no, no.
Speaker 3: I've not lied. You've just inserted your own thoughts on
Speaker 3: what you think is truth, only for me to clarify situations.
Speaker 3: You create your own stories, beau to you of my information.
Speaker 1: That's so true. I create my own narrative based on
Speaker 1: half perspectives.
Speaker 3: We recently Eric, and I went out on a friend's boat,
Speaker 3: and Jen took that information to believing it just came
Speaker 3: out this morning because she because I was saying, oh,
Speaker 3: I'd love to be out on a yacht, and she's like,
Speaker 3: I was shut your mouth. You were just out on
Speaker 3: a yacht like a when she's like, with your friends,
Speaker 3: you were out on a yacht, and I'm like, nope, okay,
Speaker 3: out on a jet boat, a boat owned by a rapper.
Speaker 1: When you hear that, you think, oh, a yacht, because
Speaker 1: that's how it was portrayed to me. We're going out
Speaker 1: this this friend has access to a boat owned by
Speaker 1: a rapper. And so you can see how my half
Speaker 1: perspective just I did not jump.
Speaker 3: I did not make you think that your own brain
Speaker 3: made you think that that's so true. Huh, that's so true,
Speaker 3: and now you think I lied to you. To me, No,
Speaker 3: it was a very very average sized jet boat. Still great,
Speaker 3: still fun, Still something I could never afford, or wouldn't
Speaker 3: wouldn't afford. Yeah, definitely can't afford and wouldn't afford.
Speaker 1: Let's not pretend you're man. One day, well, one day
Speaker 1: we'll make it to a yacht. Won't be ours but no,
Speaker 1: we'll make it there.
Speaker 3: Although you only aspire a cruise ships, So who do
Speaker 3: love cruise ships? Yeah, that doesn't mean I hate yachts.
Speaker 3: If we found ourselves on one, that'd be so good. Yeah,
Speaker 3: maybe we'd be real influencers.
Speaker 1: You got to meet more rappers.