WEBVTT - Second Date Update PODCAST: Set the Bar Low

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<v Speaker 1>Five, rooking Jubels second date update. You know, there's an

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<v Speaker 1>art to dating. When you go out with somebody and

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<v Speaker 1>you enjoy your time together, you kind of hang back

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<v Speaker 1>after the date and don't text right away because you

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<v Speaker 1>don't want to seem over eager. Now I hate that rule. Well,

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<v Speaker 1>it's a rule that people abide by. And Jason, who's

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<v Speaker 1>on the phone to do a second date update today,

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<v Speaker 1>is hardcore at that rule because he hasn't talked to

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<v Speaker 1>the girl he wants to call in two months. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>he's doing the two months slow play, which I think

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<v Speaker 1>is a little too long. But Jason, I don't know, man,

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<v Speaker 1>I don't know exactly what your goal is here. But

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<v Speaker 1>you want to call her now for a second date update?

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<v Speaker 1>Why wait two months? Well? Okay, so I think I'm

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<v Speaker 1>in a little bit of a unique situation here. See

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<v Speaker 1>I went out with this girl, Kathy two months ago,

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<v Speaker 1>and we went to a dinner and it was it

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<v Speaker 1>was you know, hey, oh great. So now you're just

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<v Speaker 1>reading that, it's okay. I waited two months, it was okay,

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<v Speaker 1>figured I couldn't find anything better. So now I'm going

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<v Speaker 1>to call Kathy back. Is that in the plan? Oh? No? No. I. Yes, yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>it sounds like that's the plan, Jason. Is that the

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<v Speaker 1>plan is that horrible? Yes? I just think that maybe,

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<v Speaker 1>after you know, all this time, I came to a

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<v Speaker 1>realization that this was actually what a date maybe is

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<v Speaker 1>more supposed to look. Like what does that mean, Jason?

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<v Speaker 1>Because if I didn't call somebody back for two months

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<v Speaker 1>and then I was like, all right, look, I gotta

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<v Speaker 1>get ahold of them. Even though it's been a long time,

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<v Speaker 1>I really liked them. I wouldn't describe them the way

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<v Speaker 1>you just describe the girl that you want to call.

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<v Speaker 1>What's her name, it's Kathy, Kathy. I wouldn't describe them

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<v Speaker 1>the way that you describe Kathy and be like, hey

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<v Speaker 1>it was you know, it's good. Well, let me let

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<v Speaker 1>me tell you about our date. So we go to

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<v Speaker 1>dinner and things are going okay. You know, there were

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<v Speaker 1>no like awkward surprises in the first ten minutes, and

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<v Speaker 1>I'm trying to facilitate conversation and like, you know, talk

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<v Speaker 1>about ourselves, and every single step of the way to

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<v Speaker 1>conversation just dies, you know. And it's not like it's

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<v Speaker 1>the worst date in the world, but it's like that

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<v Speaker 1>there are these long stretches of silence where like you

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<v Speaker 1>just want to squirm in your seat and you don't

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<v Speaker 1>know what you're supposed to do. It sounds like a

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<v Speaker 1>fabulous date, no wonder you want to call her back? Well, see,

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<v Speaker 1>that's sort of what I thought. I thought things were

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<v Speaker 1>not going well because about thirty minutes and she starts

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<v Speaker 1>check on her phone. So it doesn't sound like Kathy

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<v Speaker 1>wants to date you either, So okay, that's what I believed.

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<v Speaker 1>And then the next morning she texts me and says, hey,

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<v Speaker 1>thanks so much for last night. It really meant a

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<v Speaker 1>lot to me. Okay, if you're out with her, there's

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<v Speaker 1>a lot of lulls in the conversation. She's checking her

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<v Speaker 1>phone thirty minutes in, and you find out that she

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<v Speaker 1>actually had a great time. So I mean, I get

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<v Speaker 1>that text and I sort of look at it for

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<v Speaker 1>a few minutes, and then I think, like, no way,

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<v Speaker 1>there's no way I'm going out on another day with

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<v Speaker 1>this Carol Like it was bad, yeah, bad day. It

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<v Speaker 1>was so weird. Yeah, And you're like, if that's your

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<v Speaker 1>definition of fun, we have two different definitions of fun obviously, exactly,

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<v Speaker 1>So what made you change your mind? So It's been

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<v Speaker 1>two months and I've been on dates since then, trying

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<v Speaker 1>to sort of figure out what is actually good for me,

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<v Speaker 1>And every single date has been so much worse than

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<v Speaker 1>that day, so much so you want to call her

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<v Speaker 1>after two months. Not because she was so fantastic, she

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<v Speaker 1>just wasn't a psychopath. Well, she wasn't a psychopath. And

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<v Speaker 1>like I didn't have a bad time, I hadn't. It

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<v Speaker 1>wasn't great, But like, you know, maybe maybe they say that,

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<v Speaker 1>like you know, marriage is like a partnership, sort of

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<v Speaker 1>like the boring married couple, right well, like you know,

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<v Speaker 1>maybe this is that right off the bat, and I

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<v Speaker 1>can know what to expect all the way down the line,

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<v Speaker 1>you know, comfort. Normally I would be really against this,

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<v Speaker 1>but I feel like online dating has given people too

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<v Speaker 1>many choices that you don't ever know what was good.

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<v Speaker 1>Like if it was pre online dating, maybe you would

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<v Speaker 1>have given her a second chance and the second time

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<v Speaker 1>it would have been fantastic. And this date wasn't It

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<v Speaker 1>wasn't a bad date. You know. I enjoyed my meal

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<v Speaker 1>and the company was Okay, this is amazing. No, I'm

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<v Speaker 1>starting to think that okay is what I need, you know,

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<v Speaker 1>And you know, I listen to your show to second

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<v Speaker 1>Date Update, and I've heard some of the people that

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<v Speaker 1>are on here before, and I know how bad things

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<v Speaker 1>can be, and I, you know, this isn't that, you know,

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<v Speaker 1>I think, I think this is this is way better

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<v Speaker 1>than that. Yeah, just a little lagging conversation when you

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<v Speaker 1>guys went out and she didn't like mess her pants

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<v Speaker 1>and throw up on it. Honestly, it could be so

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<v Speaker 1>much worse for me, so much worse. I love that

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<v Speaker 1>our show is like taking a low bar and lowering

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<v Speaker 1>it even further. Yes, well, lets you know it, lets

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<v Speaker 1>you know how bad things can get. But that should

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<v Speaker 1>be our new show slogan. Yeah, brook at Jubil in

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<v Speaker 1>the morning, let's you know how bad things can get.

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<v Speaker 1>But honestly, Jason, she's probably not going to be super

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<v Speaker 1>excited that you haven't called her for two months. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>I realize that may be a problem. I did text

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<v Speaker 1>her um like a day ago and said, like, you know,

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<v Speaker 1>long time, no talk, stranger, Like I just trying to

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<v Speaker 1>like ignite like a conversation, and I have not gotten

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<v Speaker 1>a response, which I don't blame her for, but you know,

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<v Speaker 1>I really do want to like reach out and at

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<v Speaker 1>least try to get a second Okay, all right, Well

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<v Speaker 1>we'll play a song come back, and then call Kathy

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<v Speaker 1>and see if she's willing to go out with you again,

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<v Speaker 1>since she's not the worst option. Yeah, all right, thanks guys,

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<v Speaker 1>probably will get your second date update right after this

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<v Speaker 1>brooking jubil in the morning. Second update. If you're just

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<v Speaker 1>tuning in for today's second date update, we have Goldilocks

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<v Speaker 1>on the phone. Goldilocks goes by the name of Jason.

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<v Speaker 1>He's been in the dating world and most of his

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<v Speaker 1>dates have either been too hot or too cold, and

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<v Speaker 1>he wants us to call Kathy for him right now.

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<v Speaker 1>And Kathy is well, she's not even just right, she's

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<v Speaker 1>just okay, and that's why he likes her. He actually

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<v Speaker 1>went out on a date with her two months ago

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<v Speaker 1>and hasn't talked to her since. But now he wants

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<v Speaker 1>to call her to get another date because, according to him,

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<v Speaker 1>all of his other dates have been so bad that

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<v Speaker 1>he's thought about it and he's like, yeah, this one

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<v Speaker 1>was actually probably the most decent date I've had in

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<v Speaker 1>two months, so why not give it a shot and

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<v Speaker 1>see if she'll go out with me? Jason, I feel

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<v Speaker 1>like you should tell her or we should tell her

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<v Speaker 1>that you want to give it another shot, because hey,

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<v Speaker 1>the first one wasn't so great, but first dates are hard,

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<v Speaker 1>and maybe the second date would be better. Yes, I

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<v Speaker 1>think that's part of what I'm hoping. Okay, that's the

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<v Speaker 1>message you're trying to get out, not like, well she

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<v Speaker 1>was good enough, that's a little bit. I mean, I

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<v Speaker 1>think I'm a little worried that it's going to come

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<v Speaker 1>across as because you know, I texted hers two in

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<v Speaker 1>two months. So the fear is that, you know, she'll

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<v Speaker 1>think what I what I said. Yeah, okay, all right,

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<v Speaker 1>she'll understand the truth. But I wouldn't I wouldn't even

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<v Speaker 1>call out how bad the date was. I mean, it

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<v Speaker 1>was on your end, you said it was boring, but

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<v Speaker 1>she texted you the day after, right, Yeah, So I

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<v Speaker 1>think I think I'll say something like I wasn't ready

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<v Speaker 1>at the time. I liked you too much and I

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<v Speaker 1>didn't know how to do it, so I went away

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<v Speaker 1>for two months. Yeah it might work. All right, I'm

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<v Speaker 1>gonna doll her phone of her right now, Jason, here,

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<v Speaker 1>we are you ready? Yeah? Thanks? Good? Hello? How can

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<v Speaker 1>I speak to Kathy please? And this she Hey, what's up, Kathy?

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<v Speaker 1>How are you? This is Jewil from Brook and Jewil

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<v Speaker 1>in the Morning. From what Brook and Jewil in the Morning.

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<v Speaker 1>It's a radio show. A radio show, yeah yeah, like

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<v Speaker 1>the kind that you hear when you're listening to the

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<v Speaker 1>radio and then they're people doing a show on their

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<v Speaker 1>good description. We do one of those. Yeah, okay, and

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<v Speaker 1>I'm calling you today because we actually got an email

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<v Speaker 1>from one of our listeners about you. Oh okay, I

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<v Speaker 1>know this is weird, but we do a segment on

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<v Speaker 1>our show called the second Date Update. That's where if

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<v Speaker 1>you go out on a date with somebody and then

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<v Speaker 1>end up not calling them back after they email us

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<v Speaker 1>to see if we can get you on the phone

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<v Speaker 1>and find out what went wrong. Okay. Your situation is

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<v Speaker 1>a little different though, because the guy that wanted us

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<v Speaker 1>to call you actually kind of blew you off, but

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<v Speaker 1>he's regretting it now. His name is Jason. Jason, like

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<v Speaker 1>a few months ago, Jason. Yep, I think we're talking

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<v Speaker 1>about the same Jason. He's calling to get in touch

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<v Speaker 1>with me now. Yeah. He emailed us and said that

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<v Speaker 1>he really enjoyed your date and he doesn't really know

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<v Speaker 1>why he took so long to get back to you,

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<v Speaker 1>but he tried to actually the other day. Now you

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<v Speaker 1>haven't texted him back, so he thought he didn't. Lest

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<v Speaker 1>our help to see if we can get you on

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<v Speaker 1>the phone and find out if you would like to

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<v Speaker 1>see Jason again or if you enjoyed your time with him.

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<v Speaker 1>That's actually pretty funny. Um, that was actually a pretty

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<v Speaker 1>big night for me. Weirdly enough, the date you had

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<v Speaker 1>with Jason was a big night. Yeah, kind of. It's

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<v Speaker 1>just weird that he's asking now. I mean, like, why wait,

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<v Speaker 1>like two months, that's okay, that's what we said. Well,

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<v Speaker 1>what was so big about that night for you? Um? Well, honestly, uh,

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<v Speaker 1>that night I kind of came to the conclusion that

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<v Speaker 1>I was more interested in women than men. Whoa wow,

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<v Speaker 1>Like you came out of the closet that night. Well,

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<v Speaker 1>I mean that came like, you know, like a week

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<v Speaker 1>or so later, But like I that night I realized,

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<v Speaker 1>you know what it was that I actually wanted good

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<v Speaker 1>for you? Wow, way to find your truth? How did

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<v Speaker 1>that hit you all of a sudden while you're out

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<v Speaker 1>with Jason. I just kind of felt like the whole

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<v Speaker 1>time on our date, I was just kind of bored,

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<v Speaker 1>Like I felt like I was really grasping at things

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<v Speaker 1>to talk about, and they just, you know, nothing was

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<v Speaker 1>really landing. And over the course of the evening, I

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<v Speaker 1>just kind of felt like I was more interested in

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<v Speaker 1>like looking at our waitress than I wasn't Jason, was

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<v Speaker 1>this something you were thinking about like prior or? It was?

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<v Speaker 1>Literally everything happened that night. I think I had some

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<v Speaker 1>a little bit of confusion, But I just had been

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<v Speaker 1>dating men my whole life, and I just, you know,

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<v Speaker 1>I felt like this was what I was supposed to

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<v Speaker 1>be doing, and then it was just that night, I

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<v Speaker 1>was just like, what am I doing clearly and continually

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<v Speaker 1>date guys that I'm not interested in? Why am I

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<v Speaker 1>not interested in them? Maybe because I'm not interested in

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<v Speaker 1>men in general. Good on you, Kathy, But I'm confused though,

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<v Speaker 1>because he said that you texted him the next morning

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<v Speaker 1>like praising your night with him. Well, I honestly just

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<v Speaker 1>wanted to thank him, Like I really woke up that

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<v Speaker 1>next morning just feeling like a whole new person, and

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<v Speaker 1>I wanted to thank him because I feel like that

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<v Speaker 1>was the turning point for my life. Like I feel

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<v Speaker 1>like I know who I am Now, that's amazing. He

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<v Speaker 1>read your text completely wrong. He thought you were texting

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<v Speaker 1>him saying how much fun you had on the date,

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<v Speaker 1>not that your date was so boring it made you

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<v Speaker 1>switch teams. Oh my god, he thought that I meant

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<v Speaker 1>like that I had a good time. Yeah. Yeah, Oh,

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<v Speaker 1>I meant like, thank you for helping me figure out

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<v Speaker 1>my life, right, thank you for helping reveal my truth.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm sure he'd be shocked to know that that's what

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<v Speaker 1>that text meant. And you might be shocked to know

0:11:44.559 --> 0:11:46.480
<v Speaker 1>that he's on the other line listening and wants to

0:11:46.480 --> 0:11:56.920
<v Speaker 1>talk to you. Oh no, Jason, Yeah, shocked. Oh season,

0:11:57.000 --> 0:12:02.360
<v Speaker 1>I'm sorry. I just I can't believe this. You're telling

0:12:02.400 --> 0:12:05.560
<v Speaker 1>me that that I like because you went on a

0:12:05.640 --> 0:12:08.559
<v Speaker 1>date with me, you realize that, you know, I mean,

0:12:08.600 --> 0:12:12.040
<v Speaker 1>if there was anything wrong with you, well there is.

0:12:12.120 --> 0:12:14.640
<v Speaker 1>There's a big thing wrong. Well there's a thing wrong

0:12:14.640 --> 0:12:17.839
<v Speaker 1>with Jason. You've been with guys before, though, I don't

0:12:17.920 --> 0:12:20.400
<v Speaker 1>understand why, you know why it was your night with

0:12:20.440 --> 0:12:23.480
<v Speaker 1>me that changed everything? Like, what was I doing so wrong?

0:12:24.400 --> 0:12:26.200
<v Speaker 1>You didn't do anything wrong. I think it was just

0:12:26.240 --> 0:12:29.040
<v Speaker 1>the culmination of a lot of dating of men and

0:12:29.120 --> 0:12:32.360
<v Speaker 1>realizing that I wasn't enjoying myself, and I guess you

0:12:32.400 --> 0:12:34.360
<v Speaker 1>were just the last date that I didn't enjoy that.

0:12:34.400 --> 0:12:36.880
<v Speaker 1>I kind of went, well, maybe it's because I'm not

0:12:36.920 --> 0:12:41.000
<v Speaker 1>ago men. Yeah, but then why would you text me

0:12:41.120 --> 0:12:43.400
<v Speaker 1>the next morning like that is only something that you

0:12:43.440 --> 0:12:46.439
<v Speaker 1>would do if you were interested in me. If I recall,

0:12:46.480 --> 0:12:49.000
<v Speaker 1>I texted you that, you know, just thanking you for

0:12:49.040 --> 0:12:51.079
<v Speaker 1>a great night. I didn't ask to see you again.

0:12:51.200 --> 0:12:54.360
<v Speaker 1>I mean, you didn't text me back, so I figured, oh, great,

0:12:54.400 --> 0:12:56.960
<v Speaker 1>wrong with your age? Yeah that would still I mean,

0:12:57.000 --> 0:12:58.760
<v Speaker 1>that was still kind of a lie. Then, right, you

0:12:58.800 --> 0:13:02.120
<v Speaker 1>didn't have a great night with me? What, Jason, are

0:13:02.160 --> 0:13:07.880
<v Speaker 1>you actually but her about this? Yeah? Of course I am, Like,

0:13:08.160 --> 0:13:10.240
<v Speaker 1>I was not the reason that it was a boring date.

0:13:10.440 --> 0:13:12.440
<v Speaker 1>I don't buy that as the reason she texted me

0:13:12.480 --> 0:13:15.120
<v Speaker 1>that in the morning. I think she's you know, I

0:13:15.120 --> 0:13:19.520
<v Speaker 1>think you're trying to get back at me. If I'm honest, Jason,

0:13:19.559 --> 0:13:23.280
<v Speaker 1>are you accusing Cathy of lying? I mean, I don't

0:13:23.280 --> 0:13:25.440
<v Speaker 1>believe that that was the night she decided that she was,

0:13:25.559 --> 0:13:27.679
<v Speaker 1>you know, playing for the other team. I don't believe it.

0:13:27.840 --> 0:13:31.520
<v Speaker 1>So Jason, you're saying that you are just God's gift

0:13:31.559 --> 0:13:35.480
<v Speaker 1>to women, And there's absolutely no way that I could

0:13:35.520 --> 0:13:40.280
<v Speaker 1>not be interested in you that I'm saying. I think

0:13:40.320 --> 0:13:42.480
<v Speaker 1>that maybe you're upset that I didn't text you back,

0:13:42.520 --> 0:13:44.480
<v Speaker 1>and so now you're trying to embarrass me on the

0:13:44.600 --> 0:13:49.200
<v Speaker 1>radio and that's the set. How are you turning her

0:13:49.320 --> 0:13:52.440
<v Speaker 1>moment of truth into something that's about you, dude? I

0:13:52.480 --> 0:13:55.480
<v Speaker 1>just think it's it's a pretty good story, you know

0:13:55.480 --> 0:13:58.080
<v Speaker 1>what I mean, Like she was on her phone the

0:13:58.120 --> 0:13:59.920
<v Speaker 1>whole night, and you're telling me that was the turning

0:14:00.040 --> 0:14:03.240
<v Speaker 1>point of her life. No way testing my best friend

0:14:03.440 --> 0:14:07.080
<v Speaker 1>because we had been having this conversation about you know,

0:14:07.240 --> 0:14:09.760
<v Speaker 1>am I interested in women? I don't know, I don't

0:14:09.800 --> 0:14:13.200
<v Speaker 1>know how I feel. And I had, you know, just

0:14:13.360 --> 0:14:16.480
<v Speaker 1>such an epiphany on our date that yeah, I texted

0:14:16.559 --> 0:14:20.160
<v Speaker 1>her and it really still was appropriate to share with you.

0:14:20.680 --> 0:14:24.640
<v Speaker 1>I think would have been if you shared it with him. Like, hey,

0:14:25.000 --> 0:14:27.360
<v Speaker 1>by the way, half an hour into this date with you,

0:14:27.480 --> 0:14:30.080
<v Speaker 1>I just figured out that I am a lesbian. All right,

0:14:30.160 --> 0:14:33.440
<v Speaker 1>let's finish up. Do you want dessert? I mean maybe

0:14:33.440 --> 0:14:35.440
<v Speaker 1>he could have been my wingman for the waitress. I mean,

0:14:35.480 --> 0:14:40.240
<v Speaker 1>I don't know, yeah, Jason, I mean, you guys could

0:14:40.240 --> 0:14:43.400
<v Speaker 1>still be friends. You did help her in a big

0:14:43.480 --> 0:14:46.800
<v Speaker 1>moment of her life. It was very pivotal. Yeah. Yeah,

0:14:46.840 --> 0:14:48.680
<v Speaker 1>I did introduce you some of my friends, like, I'm

0:14:48.680 --> 0:14:51.840
<v Speaker 1>open to that. Well, Kathy, what would you say to

0:14:51.920 --> 0:14:54.040
<v Speaker 1>going out on another date with Jason? We will pay

0:14:54.040 --> 0:14:55.600
<v Speaker 1>for it? Would you go on a second date with Jason?

0:14:56.680 --> 0:15:01.560
<v Speaker 1>I would say, if he wants a wingman to help

0:15:01.640 --> 0:15:04.200
<v Speaker 1>him find women and you guys want to pay for that,

0:15:04.280 --> 0:15:08.360
<v Speaker 1>I would love to help him in that situation. So, Kathy,

0:15:08.480 --> 0:15:10.040
<v Speaker 1>is that a knowe? Or will you go out with

0:15:10.120 --> 0:15:13.360
<v Speaker 1>Jason and help him find chicks? I mean, I do

0:15:13.480 --> 0:15:15.480
<v Speaker 1>have some friends, but I could probably set him up

0:15:15.520 --> 0:15:19.040
<v Speaker 1>with You're saying you might have some straight friends who

0:15:19.080 --> 0:15:22.880
<v Speaker 1>who who would be interested in me to they actually

0:15:22.880 --> 0:15:26.000
<v Speaker 1>go out on a date Jason. No, I mean, honestly,

0:15:26.080 --> 0:15:29.360
<v Speaker 1>at this point, I'll just take any date with anyone

0:15:29.360 --> 0:15:33.680
<v Speaker 1>who wants to go out with me. Oh my gosh, well, congratulations,

0:15:33.800 --> 0:15:38.720
<v Speaker 1>Jason deserves you might have got a second date. I

0:15:38.840 --> 0:15:40.560
<v Speaker 1>just I hope I don't bring anyone else to any

0:15:40.600 --> 0:15:45.840
<v Speaker 1>big realization on my next date. Broken up in the morning,