Speaker 1: Forever.
Speaker 2: Oh, hello, hello Marie. Oh wow, the voice and you
Speaker 2: have every year. Once a year your voice changes very deep.
Speaker 3: Oh is that just the season?
Speaker 2: Tis the season? Yeah?
Speaker 3: Well no, this is this is not seasonal. This is
Speaker 3: you know. I just I was out the other day
Speaker 3: screaming at me and it's okay, So me and Sydney went
Speaker 3: to we outside, okay, we went to a rooftop thing
Speaker 3: where everybody was very hot. All the men were tall
Speaker 3: and their beards connected all the way around.
Speaker 2: Marie couldn't believe it. I text her at me. I said, Marie,
Speaker 2: you need to get here right now. She's like, Sis,
Speaker 2: I'm ten minutes away. I was like, everybody's cute. Every
Speaker 2: single person was hot.
Speaker 3: Right forty eight minutes later I arrived right and everybody
Speaker 3: was so attractive and like young and the skin. It
Speaker 3: was like it was like I said to Sydney, I
Speaker 3: think I'm gonna write my number on the wall and
Speaker 3: whoever calls me, you just can't call me.
Speaker 2: Man, woman or child.
Speaker 3: Yes, well no children, but there.
Speaker 2: Were some kids on the roof too, and they were
Speaker 2: cute kids.
Speaker 3: But yes, there were kids on the roof, and it
Speaker 3: was like people really just be bringing their kids with
Speaker 3: them to stuff.
Speaker 2: Me as a as a childless woman, you don't understand.
Speaker 3: I don't have to have children to understand that kids
Speaker 3: don't need to be nowhere. Actually, me being childless, I
Speaker 3: understand it better. I understand it better.
Speaker 2: But sometimes it's sometimes it's hard to get a nanny.
Speaker 2: Sometimes it's hard to get a babysitter. Sometimes you don't.
Speaker 3: Have the Sydney also a childless woman, what's you talking about?
Speaker 2: The cats? It's yo. You'd be surprised how many people
Speaker 2: are like, I'm allergic. I'm not gonna be in town.
Speaker 2: I can't do it. I could do one cat, I
Speaker 2: can't do both. So like I feel for the women
Speaker 2: who have to bring their animals or children to a party.
Speaker 3: Mm hmm, Sidney, if you ever pull up to any
Speaker 3: place that I'm at and you got the cats in
Speaker 3: a little bass in it, I'm gonna roast you until
Speaker 3: you go home. I'm gonna roast you until you leave.
Speaker 3: I was. I just read this thing today. This girl
Speaker 3: was like, my sister doesn't want my newborn baby at
Speaker 3: her wedding. Should I be upset? And because her sister's
Speaker 3: having a no a childless wedding and she was so upset,
Speaker 3: and it was like, girl, you gonna have a newborn
Speaker 3: at a six month old at a wedding. We definitely
Speaker 3: don't want that.
Speaker 2: I mean, what's the return policy on a six month
Speaker 2: old baby? It's still brand new you. I don't think you.
Speaker 2: Babies are so unpredictable. Unpredictable, so like people could be
Speaker 2: doing that vows and everything and then they're just like screaming.
Speaker 3: Babies are predictable. They crying, they're sleeping, they're pooping, that's it.
Speaker 2: But you don't know when they're gonna cry.
Speaker 3: It could be right when she's doing her her vows,
Speaker 3: she got tears in her eyes and she's like, right,
Speaker 3: you know, I never and now your baby is teething
Speaker 3: or whatever. I don't know what babies do with.
Speaker 2: Something annoying or or if the pastors, like, does anybody
Speaker 2: object to them getting there? I mean, I understand when
Speaker 2: you're saying, Marie, but the kids were fine on the roof.
Speaker 2: I was too busy looking at everybody's moisturized foreheads and
Speaker 2: beautiful hairlines. M hm hmm.
Speaker 3: It's the summer of the hairline, I think. So if
Speaker 3: you're listening to this, get them plugs, get them sharpies,
Speaker 3: get the that brown lip liner pencil. Just do what
Speaker 3: you need to do to get the edges to look
Speaker 3: how we want them to look.
Speaker 2: Yeah, they and they have lace fronts beards for men,
Speaker 2: so y'all could try those out as well. Do what
Speaker 2: you need to do, honey.
Speaker 3: If you gotta do that, then make sure you use
Speaker 3: the gorilla glue to really hold it to the face.
Speaker 2: Because imagine, Marie, you take a guy back and if
Speaker 2: the lights are off and he's like busy taking his
Speaker 2: beard off and laying it on the.
Speaker 3: Side, he's folding it. Oh my god, I got it
Speaker 3: to pee in the middle of the night and I
Speaker 3: see it and I think it's a mouse and I
Speaker 3: step on it.
Speaker 2: Yeah, because that's happened with me with my lashes or
Speaker 2: my wig, so it could definitely happen to a lace front.
Speaker 3: You stepped on your wig, Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2: Sometimes it just slides off because I don't have a
Speaker 2: like a little mannequin head.
Speaker 3: So it just Sidney takes her wig off and she
Speaker 3: folds it and she puts it on the couch and
Speaker 3: jam Be sitting on it.
Speaker 2: Speaking of Jam, our our guest today is my jam
Speaker 2: One of my favorite, one of my favorite people in
Speaker 2: the whole wide world. So special all the way on
Speaker 2: the West West coast, thriving mare, we would say, thriving,
Speaker 2: living and thriving.
Speaker 3: The skin looks good. I see the stainless steel refrigerator
Speaker 3: in the back. The beard is fully connected all the
Speaker 3: way around.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, he's he's one of my most successful friends.
Speaker 2: That is very humble, and I think it's because of
Speaker 2: his background. Give it up for Garrick Bernard and he
Speaker 2: is child of an immigrant or child of immigrant parents, child.
Speaker 3: Of we can just say immigrant parent. Experts Like what word.
Speaker 4: Am I writing?
Speaker 1: Internet parent? Sorry?
Speaker 3: Immigrant parent? Immigrant parent? He Hi, how you doing, Grek?
Speaker 1: I'm good? How are you up chilling?
Speaker 3: We're good? Your teeth are very white? What what's that
Speaker 3: this is?
Speaker 1: I use baking soda. I use what is that?
Speaker 5: Three D white, the cress or Colgate D white.
Speaker 2: The strips. You don't use the strips to you, No.
Speaker 5: I don't use the strips, just the brush because.
Speaker 2: They take off they take off the.
Speaker 1: Enamel, the enamel. Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, But he really needs,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean, all of it. Honestly, you
Speaker 1: need every single like every drop gram, every drop I'm
Speaker 1: sorry her baking soda, and I was like, oh, let
Speaker 1: me put in like the Grams drug.
Speaker 3: We get it.
Speaker 2: He's a very smart guy. He's a very smart guy. Now, Garret,
Speaker 2: do you have anything to say about like men wearing
Speaker 2: lace front beards air lines connecting?
Speaker 1: All right? Hey, guys, stop it, don't do it, chill out.
Speaker 1: Don't just just embrace the baldness. Embrace the fact that
Speaker 1: your beard doesn't connect. I don't have those problems, but
Speaker 1: I will say, if you know, if my hair goes
Speaker 1: and all that stuff, I'm gonna get those plugs.
Speaker 5: Probably I'm gonna get like ten grand or some shit.
Speaker 1: Get that.
Speaker 3: You wanna let them go and let them put pubes
Speaker 3: on your hairline.
Speaker 5: It's the back of your head.
Speaker 1: It's they take they take hair from the back of
Speaker 1: your head, put it on the top and you just
Speaker 1: you're chilling. Why not?
Speaker 3: But I feel like you would look good as a
Speaker 3: bald person because you could look the fact that you
Speaker 3: have facial hair. You could be completely bald and just
Speaker 3: get like a red rouse just like yeah, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 3: James Harden well moisturized moment.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't want to find out if I'm being honest,
Speaker 1: I don't want to. I just want to.
Speaker 2: Well, Grek, you're also very young, so you're fine, Like
Speaker 2: you're not even thirty yet.
Speaker 1: Right, No, I turned thirty in September. September what fifth?
Speaker 3: Okay, happy birthday.
Speaker 5: I'm sorry. I apologize.
Speaker 3: Birthday is on the twenty third. I don't know why
Speaker 3: I got so September. Wow, yeah, somebody else that was
Speaker 3: conceived in January.
Speaker 1: Okay at the beginning the beginning.
Speaker 3: Okay, go ahead. Sorry.
Speaker 2: I was gonna say, so, you guys have never met
Speaker 2: each other in real life. This is your first time speaking.
Speaker 2: But I was, like, I told Yerk, like, oh, you
Speaker 2: and Marie are going to get along very well because
Speaker 2: you have some of the same uh backgrounds in terms
Speaker 2: of immigrant parents, except she's Haitian and your Nigerian Timid daddy.
Speaker 3: And I was also going to guess Nigerian Sydney night Yearian.
Speaker 3: Well his name is Bernard, Yeah, Bernard, I guess that's
Speaker 3: not Nigerian cist. It would have more sorry consonants and vowels.
Speaker 1: Yeah. Everybody's like, hey, you Nigeria, you darkest fun like
Speaker 1: it's it's it all goes there, and I'm like, hey, man,
Speaker 1: you need to reevaluate your biases or whatever.
Speaker 3: I would not have Trinidadian you know, neither. Yeah, I've
Speaker 3: canceled Trinidadians in my life numerous times.
Speaker 1: Oh oh wow, okay, what happened? Well, if you don't mind.
Speaker 3: Me as Trinidadian men being Trinidadian men, and that's okay,
Speaker 3: all right, And that's basically it.
Speaker 2: So I can't say I can't say anything specific, but
Speaker 2: I just know that Caribbean men men from the West
Speaker 2: Indies there, it's too much ego involved, too much ego,
Speaker 2: too much cheating. I just I can't be bothered. Also,
Speaker 2: they're men, so I just also can't be bothered with
Speaker 2: that as well.
Speaker 1: Fair enough, Yeah, fair enough. I think I lucked out
Speaker 1: a little bit. My dad has been married to my
Speaker 1: mom for I don't know, thirty years plus, so he was,
Speaker 1: I guess, quote unquote one of the better ones. I
Speaker 1: don't know if he's one of the good ones, but
Speaker 1: he's one of the better ones.
Speaker 3: I don't know if they have a side family in Trinida.
Speaker 1: He doesn't have a side family. I'm hoping he doesn't
Speaker 1: have a side family. And if he does, kudos for
Speaker 1: keeping that a secret.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Honestly, you can't be mad at a dad that
Speaker 2: was able to keep a whole family secret for the
Speaker 2: whole duration of having a Yes you can. You can.
Speaker 3: You have a funeral and you're like, who are these
Speaker 3: other people? These must be cousins with the same exact
Speaker 3: faces us. You can fully be mad at a dad
Speaker 3: that has family on the side.
Speaker 2: The only time I would be mad at a dad
Speaker 2: for not telling you about their other family is if
Speaker 2: I just so happened to meet, you know, a daughter
Speaker 2: of his, and I'm like, damn, she find his fuck
Speaker 2: and we meet up and we link up and now
Speaker 2: we dating, and now I'm like, wait, that's my stepsister, right,
Speaker 2: that's doing up?
Speaker 3: Since this sounds like the plot line of all the
Speaker 3: soap operas.
Speaker 1: That have ever existed, Yeah, truly with.
Speaker 3: The gay twist, with a twist. So Garrick tell us
Speaker 3: about growing up as Trinidaddian America. Are you first generation?
Speaker 5: First generation? Yeah, born and raised in LA.
Speaker 1: It was weird because a lot of a lot of
Speaker 1: them go to New York.
Speaker 3: Say Trinidadians are in l a A.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I never heard of that when I.
Speaker 3: When I lived in LA, I was one of two
Speaker 3: Haitian people who lived there.
Speaker 1: And I was like, wow, yeah, there's no West Indians
Speaker 1: out here. I think like the only ones we really
Speaker 1: met were like through church, so you know, big church
Speaker 1: family LA.
Speaker 2: I would never go to.
Speaker 1: Congratulations congratulations on that. Don't do it. There's there's not
Speaker 1: enough praise dancing, you know. But yeah, like it was.
Speaker 1: It was normal ish. You know, you don't really know
Speaker 1: anything different, you know, so like I went Seventh day
Speaker 1: Adventist church. Uh went to church on Saturdays. That was
Speaker 1: the first like off thing I would. I remember bringing
Speaker 1: curry go to school and I want to say like
Speaker 1: third grade and I got destroyed.
Speaker 3: You just bought like a plate of curry.
Speaker 1: Go a plate a curry goat and they're like, oh
Speaker 1: what is that? That looks great. I'm like, let's goat
Speaker 1: and they're like, nigga, you weird, like for the rest
Speaker 1: of my life because because you know, you go to
Speaker 1: you go to an A any L A U.
Speaker 4: S D.
Speaker 1: School and most of them you know, know each other.
Speaker 1: There's about like, you know, the sixth degrees of separation there.
Speaker 1: So like that was you know, I was goat boy
Speaker 1: for years.
Speaker 3: No, yeah, boy, So that's why you.
Speaker 1: You know, you do stand up and try to become
Speaker 1: famous so you can be like, who's got boy now, nigga,
Speaker 1: the gonna be like, oh my.
Speaker 3: God, still you?
Speaker 1: Still you? Yeah, it's still you.
Speaker 2: So you're telling me that they didn't even try the goat.
Speaker 1: No, they didn't even try it, because it's excellent. It's
Speaker 1: fucking incredible, curry goat.
Speaker 2: It's delicious. But that has it.
Speaker 3: I don't love it. I don't love goat.
Speaker 1: That's fair.
Speaker 2: Yeah, well, they have to make it, they have to
Speaker 2: make it right. It's not always if it's made, you.
Speaker 1: Know, relax, yeah, and if it's like real hard and
Speaker 1: whatnot and not. You don't want that. You don't want
Speaker 1: a tough piece of goat. You want it to be succulent,
Speaker 1: you know.
Speaker 2: And you also don't want it gummy. You don't want
Speaker 2: to like, you don't want a gummy.
Speaker 5: That's one of the worst I go, right, yes, exactly
Speaker 5: did you?
Speaker 3: I was talking to somebody about this the other day.
Speaker 3: Did you go to school ever? And people would say
Speaker 3: you smell like your house?
Speaker 1: No? So we didn't have that problem, thank got because uh,
Speaker 1: middle class, that's I think that's it. We errated the
Speaker 1: home very often.
Speaker 3: I just like, sometimes my mom would cook stuff, like
Speaker 3: she'd like fry fish, or she'd like cook something that
Speaker 3: was like really and it would be like in my coat,
Speaker 3: and I'd go to school and people be like, what
Speaker 3: is that smell? And I'd be like, what smell? Because
Speaker 3: you don't you smell it. It's all your nose hairs, right.
Speaker 2: People would say that I smelled like my home, But
Speaker 2: my home smelled like larks cigarettes. My mom would smoke
Speaker 2: a whole pack like a day, So I always smell
Speaker 2: like cigarettes and hair grease. So I don't know if
Speaker 2: that's a cultural thing or just I mean, my mom thing.
Speaker 2: I don't know.
Speaker 1: I would just call you sick as fuck honestly smoking already. Damn,
Speaker 1: that's pretty dope, that's pretty wow.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 1: But like if you come if you come in the
Speaker 1: house like smelling like curry, are you coming to school
Speaker 1: coming smelling like curry? That's you know, that's a big
Speaker 1: that's a big problem, I think, because that's a very
Speaker 1: pungent smell, you know. But luckily my family only did
Speaker 1: that on the weekends. They only cooked like wowd spicy
Speaker 1: stuff on the weekends or at night to where you know,
Speaker 1: the smell would dissipate by the time we woke up
Speaker 1: in the morning.
Speaker 3: For scores looking at night and the windows not open.
Speaker 3: It's in the sheets.
Speaker 2: Yes, it's literally in you.
Speaker 3: It's in your poor yes, the cloth, it's on the
Speaker 3: bath man, it's on that little rug that goes on
Speaker 3: the back of the toilet. In old black.
Speaker 5: Homes, it's oh my god, it's.
Speaker 3: In the daytime. They like have the cross breeze.
Speaker 1: Yeah, mm hmmm.
Speaker 2: Here's your personal question. So what did your mom and
Speaker 2: dad do for a living.
Speaker 1: So my mom was a PA, a physician's assistant, and
Speaker 1: then my dad was a contractor. So, uh, bottom hills
Speaker 1: were up there, you know.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 3: Oh, for those that are not in the know, that's
Speaker 3: like black people. That was the hills for black folks.
Speaker 5: It was a hills with black black people. Laguna Beach
Speaker 5: or like that was like their their take on it.
Speaker 2: Well, Garret, so it sound like I mean you you
Speaker 2: you said immigrant parents, but I mean it seems real
Speaker 2: simply black to me.
Speaker 1: I don't know, It's okay. So this is where this
Speaker 1: is where the explanation must come. Yes, we were still
Speaker 1: poor for the most part. They got the house they
Speaker 1: got the house up there because they're just like, oh, well,
Speaker 1: let's put all of our funds into this thing to
Speaker 1: keep our kids from the surrounding areas. And then we
Speaker 1: would get sent home or sent to school with like
Speaker 1: hand me downs or with fucking all of the regular
Speaker 1: There was a whole year where I wore a uniform
Speaker 1: when the school didn't require a uniform, just because.
Speaker 3: Paying for these days.
Speaker 1: I'm not paying for these clothes, you know, we gotta
Speaker 1: we got a mortgage to the uniform.
Speaker 2: Still looks good, and she is she's sewing, she's imming
Speaker 2: the stuff, making sure all the tattered shorts are still
Speaker 2: like looking neat what.
Speaker 1: Was then a white shirt with a navy bottom.
Speaker 3: And in the winter time it was like slacks, and
Speaker 3: in the summer time it was like little school uniform
Speaker 3: booty shorts.
Speaker 5: No, no, no booty shorts.
Speaker 1: It was pretty much la It's the same temperature the
Speaker 1: whole time, right right, Yeah, yeah, thats a weird thing.
Speaker 2: Was there a lot so seasons there wasn't a lot
Speaker 2: of Trinidadians in your school?
Speaker 1: Absolutely not. I was the only one.
Speaker 2: You were the only for.
Speaker 5: My entire life, probably the entire school career.
Speaker 2: What any other ethnicities just.
Speaker 1: I mean there were there were a couple of Nigerians,
Speaker 1: I guess, and like Persian folks, uh.
Speaker 3: Pers a couple of Persian folks in l A.
Speaker 1: Couple, yeah, mostly yeah, and in high school. Yeah, but honestly,
Speaker 1: I was the only Caribbean kid in school for sure.
Speaker 3: When you came home from your first day of school,
Speaker 3: would your mom ask you about the kids in your class?
Speaker 5: No, she don't give a fuck.
Speaker 3: That was my mom, My mother's go to anytime I
Speaker 3: came home from school, she'd be like, how many black
Speaker 3: kids in your class? How many? How many that? And
Speaker 3: I would I would, I would count. I'd be like,
Speaker 3: it's me Jazz Maine, Like I would count them out,
Speaker 3: and she'd be like, okay, okay, okay, it's black kids
Speaker 3: in the class. And it was like, there's always gonna
Speaker 3: be black kids in the class. This is New York.
Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, yeah, so there was.
Speaker 1: Yeah, they were very adamant about putting us in black
Speaker 1: schools up until high school, like all black schools pretty
Speaker 1: much until ninth grade, when they shipped me out to
Speaker 1: fucking Palisades to go to school there.
Speaker 2: Why did they do that?
Speaker 3: College reasons?
Speaker 5: College reasons.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you get into better colleges and I didn't, so
Speaker 1: it didn't work. All of my friends that stayed in
Speaker 1: like black high schools got into better schools than I did.
Speaker 1: And I was like, why didn't you just keep me
Speaker 1: with my friends? Kept shifting me around?
Speaker 3: You should have stayed at east Side High with Morgan Freeman.
Speaker 2: But.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, I should have. Marie. What did you did
Speaker 1: you move schools a lot? Did you like switch? No?
Speaker 2: Not really.
Speaker 3: And my parents were like, the bus runs right here,
Speaker 3: You're gonna take that bus to that school?
Speaker 1: Okay.
Speaker 3: It was like, no, that's it, I'm going to I
Speaker 3: know they knew the route for the parent teacher conference,
Speaker 3: that's where they were going, all right. But my parents
Speaker 3: were big on parent teacher conferences. Like my dad as
Speaker 3: as an immigrant, you know, everything that he wears is
Speaker 3: tucked into his pants. Yes, I don't know if you
Speaker 3: have one of those dads, but like he'll took a
Speaker 3: sweater into some swim pants and on a.
Speaker 2: Dress shoe, put a hard bottom on with the bottom.
Speaker 3: But my dad, I home a couple of months ago.
Speaker 3: He still like buffs and shines his shoes. He is
Speaker 3: like a brush and a polish and he is shining
Speaker 3: them to go. It's like you want an errands, like
Speaker 3: you can't throw a dad new balance on No, because
Speaker 3: they always.
Speaker 2: Want to look good they I think, I don't know,
Speaker 2: I don't know if it's just like immigrant parents, but
Speaker 2: it's also just like older parents. They always want to
Speaker 2: make sure that they're looking their best, even when it's like,
Speaker 2: is it I think your best? But like I understand
Speaker 2: the notion of like polishing your shoes, but I don't
Speaker 2: get that. I don't get that.
Speaker 1: This is this is why Monique is coming for you
Speaker 1: with the hair, with the hair ship. It's just like, yo, chill, Monique, chill.
Speaker 1: Let me wear my fucking hat. You know. I'm sorry.
Speaker 2: It's a bondy.
Speaker 3: Same thing. But Monique is from a different time as well.
Speaker 1: She's there, you know.
Speaker 3: I mean, I don't know how old Onnique is, but
Speaker 3: she is from a time when people actually cared about
Speaker 3: what they looked like, and people were tucking in things
Speaker 3: and ironing.
Speaker 2: Things, ironing things such thing as steaming. They were having
Speaker 2: an ironing board and iron the fucking I mean, they
Speaker 2: would hit those corners so.
Speaker 3: Fucking the pleats on the pants be.
Speaker 1: Christy Christy, Yeah, I can iron the fuck out of
Speaker 1: some clothes, honestly, just from learning from my parents, just
Speaker 1: from them being like, you're not going outside with the
Speaker 1: wrinkley shirt. Absolutely not. I remember when I started wearing
Speaker 1: I started wearing like straighter suits, you know, like more
Speaker 1: slim fitting suits, and they immediately were just like, what's
Speaker 1: going on, boss, Like are you okay? The whole they
Speaker 1: wanted to have a whole conversation just because I was
Speaker 1: wearing tighter bluffs.
Speaker 2: They thought you were gay.
Speaker 5: They thought I was gay, Yeah, hundred percent.
Speaker 1: They sat you down and though, uh huh yeah, it's
Speaker 1: just like so your your your clothes are fitting a
Speaker 1: little bit more nicely snug. It's more snug, yeah, right,
Speaker 1: And I was like, come on, you guys, can we
Speaker 1: can do better?
Speaker 3: Like it's the European cut. They're like the.
Speaker 1: European cut, right, Okay, Okay.
Speaker 2: That's the style. It's a truly style. But I have
Speaker 2: to understand that, like they have been through so much,
Speaker 2: and so if they want to be really particular about
Speaker 2: what we're wearing, I'll let it slide. Sometimes. Like me,
Speaker 2: growing up, my skirts had to be so long, yes,
Speaker 2: because my arms were long. They're like, no lady should
Speaker 2: have a skirt. And you know, my family is not immigrants,
Speaker 2: but they are very like old fashioned and very church going.
Speaker 2: You know, no lady should have a skirt shorter than
Speaker 2: where her her middle finger hits on the leg. And
Speaker 2: I was the one had long as I could hit
Speaker 2: the top of a shelf, so long.
Speaker 1: They weren't encounting. They weren't accounting for the reach.
Speaker 3: No Sydney, because Sydney can dunk. I've seen it.
Speaker 5: Yeah, I believe it.
Speaker 2: They had me looking like a Mormon every single day.
Speaker 2: I was like, why is the skirt? This is not
Speaker 2: a skirt. You might as well put me in pants.
Speaker 2: Oh no, no, no, No lady would wear pants. No, no, no,
Speaker 2: young ladies should wear pants. That's for the men.
Speaker 3: So your your great aunts and stuff didn't wear pants.
Speaker 2: No, she never wore pants. She always wore skirts. It
Speaker 2: didn't matter what the weather was, It didn't matter if
Speaker 2: her like vericose veins were popping and she was wearing
Speaker 2: her skirts and they she would hit. They would be
Speaker 2: so fucking long. I'm like auntie gowns and the beautiful
Speaker 2: girl she would have, she would have a slip underneath
Speaker 2: the skirt. She would never wear a dress without a.
Speaker 3: Slip and you could see the slip.
Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker 3: When I was little, my mother wore skirts, and I
Speaker 3: remember when she shifted back to pants, because I have
Speaker 3: pictures of her in like Europe in short ash jeans
Speaker 3: and booty shorts. But when we were young, she only
Speaker 3: would wear dresses or skirts, and I used to complain
Speaker 3: about it because she will put me in them for school. Like,
Speaker 3: my mom's big thing was the first day of school
Speaker 3: every year, right, So on the first day of school,
Speaker 3: we had to wear a skirt or a dress, no pants. Yeah,
Speaker 3: And that was until I got I think until I
Speaker 3: got to high school. It was like, Babe, I'm putting
Speaker 3: on these jeans today, and you gotta let me wear
Speaker 3: these jeans.
Speaker 1: You gotta let me fly, let me put these jeans,
Speaker 1: all that.
Speaker 3: But she wasn't picking my clothes out. I think after
Speaker 3: kindergarten I told her I wanted to dress myself and
Speaker 3: she let me, but it had to be a skirt
Speaker 3: on the first day. That was like, yeah, there was
Speaker 3: no negotiating that. Yeah, And now.
Speaker 1: So I will I will say I just started wearing
Speaker 1: shorts three years ago. Really like, yeah, because of because
Speaker 1: of like, wearing like that was the move. You gotta
Speaker 1: have it either longer or under your knees, uh, your
Speaker 1: shorts under your knees, or just wear pants or whatever,
Speaker 1: because parents would always be like, well, what's going on here?
Speaker 1: Your shorts are a little high recently? Yes, yes, it was.
Speaker 1: It's masculinity. Ship is so toxic, dog, I can't even
Speaker 1: I can't even lie. I've been I've been hating humidity
Speaker 1: my entire life. And then I just realized I just
Speaker 1: needed to wear shorts. That's all I needed. Just wear
Speaker 1: shorts and you'd be fine. I'm out. I'm out here
Speaker 1: in that letter right now, and I'm just like, oh,
Speaker 1: this is nice. What the fuck? I'm moving through the
Speaker 1: you know, moving through the humidity.
Speaker 3: Fine, you got shorts?
Speaker 1: Really realizing I got short.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Garrett, Garrett has good legs, he's got a good vie.
Speaker 1: I gotta I gotta high, I gotta high fucking high
Speaker 1: thigh short on.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Grek is solid, Like you know, he's not that tall,
Speaker 2: but body.
Speaker 5: Is not tall at all. You can say I'm not tall.
Speaker 2: I didn't want to, you know, I wanted to give
Speaker 2: you the benefit of the babe. You know I didn't
Speaker 2: want to sell you under Yeah, that's not it.
Speaker 3: You did kind of anyway. You said he's solid, he's
Speaker 3: not that tall.
Speaker 1: You're right right, you didn't even as soon as you
Speaker 1: bring it up. It's just like, all right, I gotta
Speaker 1: I gotta mention it.
Speaker 2: He's he's a long five eight, that's what he is.
Speaker 3: He's a long longer than the skirts we had to wear.
Speaker 2: We love Oh god baby. Okay, so let's get into finances.
Speaker 2: Did you have an allowance? And immigrants immigrant parents are
Speaker 2: very about saving but also super cheaper, not cheap, not cheap, frugal.
Speaker 1: Bogle frugal. Absolutely not absolutely. I didn't get an allowance
Speaker 1: at all. I didn't know what that meant. I kept
Speaker 1: on hearing the kids at school saying like, oh, what
Speaker 1: are you spending your allowance on? And I got that
Speaker 1: whole like corny conversation about like you want an allowance,
Speaker 1: I allow you to live under my roof and blah
Speaker 1: blah blah blah blah. Yeah, classic classic, but not never
Speaker 1: never in life. I think I would get like one
Speaker 1: hundred dollars to get close at the beginning of the
Speaker 1: school year in high.
Speaker 3: School, Wow, that's actually kind of guess I think. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 3: I mean they were giving you the money and you
Speaker 3: could buy what you wanted.
Speaker 1: You can buy it you want it.
Speaker 2: Yeah, what can you get with one hundred dollars?
Speaker 1: I think you can buy a gene? Like one gene.
Speaker 3: No, listen, you go to Pretty Girl, you go to Strawberry,
Speaker 3: you go to Jimmy Jazz, you go to v IM.
Speaker 3: These are I don't know if those are in La.
Speaker 2: Yeah, none of those places I knew you were in LA.
Speaker 3: You can get more than one pair of jeans for
Speaker 3: one hundred dollars. I mean, you can't get no shoes.
Speaker 3: You can get a pair of sneakers.
Speaker 1: So I'm just I'm just the jeans nigga at this point,
Speaker 1: you know, just walking around with like three pairs of jeans,
Speaker 1: I guess.
Speaker 3: But they're they're ironed.
Speaker 5: They're very ironed, smooth, very very crisp.
Speaker 3: You know.
Speaker 1: No, I never I never got an allowance. I started
Speaker 1: working at like sixteen, Yeah, and just went from there.
Speaker 3: I was at the pool yesterday and this lady was
Speaker 3: talking to her kid, and she said she gets her
Speaker 3: twenty dollars a week in allowance. I said, are y'all
Speaker 3: rich twenty dollars a week. I didn't even have many
Speaker 3: dollars a week in college. That is crazy to me. Yeah,
Speaker 3: but yeah, I think my parents try to give us
Speaker 3: an allowance, like for like a summer, and it lasted
Speaker 3: like three weeks or maybe less than that. Probably we
Speaker 3: were getting five dollars right, and then it was I'm.
Speaker 1: Still getting if if I ever gave or if I
Speaker 1: ever asked mom for money, like once I moved out
Speaker 1: of the house, she's still hounding me for that, like
Speaker 1: two hundred dollars that I might have borrowed a couple
Speaker 1: of years ago.
Speaker 2: Give your mother her money back. You're making so much money, Garrett,
Speaker 2: give her your mother her money back.
Speaker 5: I'm never giving it back.
Speaker 1: She owed me this two hundred dollars.
Speaker 3: What's your mother's name? Don don Right.
Speaker 1: Yeah, one strikes fear in a weird way.
Speaker 5: She wasn't nice.
Speaker 1: Neither of my parents were nice. That's the other course. No, no, no, no,
Speaker 1: no no.
Speaker 2: They just started like, did you get hugs, I love
Speaker 2: you kisses?
Speaker 1: No no no, no, no, I mean I told you
Speaker 1: this over the phone.
Speaker 5: My dad and I just started saying I love you
Speaker 5: to each other.
Speaker 2: Last year. W Why why is that?
Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't know. I think I just started saying
Speaker 1: it in conjunction with when I was saying it to
Speaker 1: my mom. I would be like, love you guys, and
Speaker 1: then he would be like he would like or whatever.
Speaker 3: He'd be like what. They sat you back there. They
Speaker 3: were like, we need to talk about this. Your clothes
Speaker 3: are tight?
Speaker 1: You you saying I love gods? What is alright? Alright,
Speaker 1: Hollywood didn't change immediately that way.
Speaker 3: We need to have another intervention here. This is crazy.
Speaker 2: Oh my god, Derek, was that so hard for you?
Speaker 2: Like it's just saying I love you to your friends
Speaker 2: or your girlfriends, Like because Chrius Marie is who she's
Speaker 2: a tough cookie, I mean, my god, tough.
Speaker 1: I mean, I mean my genuinely my friends, Uh, try
Speaker 1: to come up with a theory that I was gay
Speaker 1: because of how hard it was for me to say
Speaker 1: I love you to my friends. They're like, what's going
Speaker 1: on there? Why? Why do you? Why do you hesitate
Speaker 1: in all this stuff? And it was just like a
Speaker 1: really wild situation. And then I had to like look
Speaker 1: back and it was like, I don't think I've ever
Speaker 1: said I love you to my dad before. Which is
Speaker 1: the first man you should say I love you too.
Speaker 1: And then I just went to my home left one
Speaker 1: day and I was like yelling out, oh, I love
Speaker 1: you Dad, and he's like, oh, I love you too.
Speaker 1: And then it's just it's just been like that ever.
Speaker 3: Since I said to my dad, Poppy, I love you.
Speaker 3: He would say, all right, all right, close the door.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I love you. Turns every immigrant father into Steve Harvey.
Speaker 1: He's just like, oh right, yeah right, where's your accent?
Speaker 3: Okay?
Speaker 2: Well, interesting, Well you have no problem now saying I
Speaker 2: love you. I mean, I think maybe it just rolls
Speaker 2: off my tongue too much. But I've definitely said I
Speaker 2: love you before to Gerk and I don't know if
Speaker 2: you said it back, but I felt I felt that
Speaker 2: you felt you felt it.
Speaker 1: I gave I give you a strong pat on the back. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's there, it is. Yeah, it's just.
Speaker 3: Now, Sidney. Did people say I love you to you
Speaker 3: a lot or do you a lot?
Speaker 2: No? Not? Not rarely really, Like my Auntie would like
Speaker 2: late night, like right before we're going to bed, before
Speaker 2: like she has nodded off reading the Bible and stuff
Speaker 2: like that. But she said whenever she would feel like
Speaker 2: I got in trouble and I was internalizing how bad
Speaker 2: I am. She's like, now you know I love you.
Speaker 2: You know you know I love you. That that's when
Speaker 2: she would reassure me that she loves me. But she
Speaker 2: wasn't just saying I love you, not like not before.
Speaker 2: I would leave the house to go, you know, to school,
Speaker 2: or leave the house at all, and I think.
Speaker 3: That's foreign to me. You would be eating yourself up,
Speaker 3: and she would say, now you know, I love you.
Speaker 3: My mother would just let me sit there, shut.
Speaker 1: There in the closet with my arms.
Speaker 3: Throng, and I couldn't. I remember one day I got
Speaker 3: in trouble and I wrote on the wall next to
Speaker 3: my bed I hate mummy, like I hate my mom,
Speaker 3: and I forgot about it. I wrote it in pencil.
Speaker 3: I walked through it like and she found it and
Speaker 3: she was like, oh what is this? And I was like,
Speaker 3: I don't even know. Everything's misspelled. It's height level with
Speaker 3: my pillow. But I'm like I don't Yeah, yeah, damn
Speaker 3: sis All right, well look.
Speaker 2: I said I say it. I say it a lot.
Speaker 2: I say it a lot because you know, you never
Speaker 2: know what's gonna happen. But also it's it's okay to
Speaker 2: say that if that's what you really feel, you know,
Speaker 2: but what is too much?
Speaker 1: Because yeah, what if it loses it's me? What if
Speaker 1: you don't even know what you're saying, just doing a
Speaker 1: call and repeat.
Speaker 2: It's well, I am thirty six years old, so I
Speaker 2: know what the fuck love is. I've been in love,
Speaker 2: I have. I have tons of friends, you know, but
Speaker 2: I do know that the love that I have, I
Speaker 2: have abundance of it. I know that I'm good at
Speaker 2: I'm great at giving. And when I say something, I
Speaker 2: mean it, you know, unless I'm being shady and talking
Speaker 2: to Marie about somebody.
Speaker 3: But other than that, when you're being shady, you mean that.
Speaker 3: Two sis, don't do that.
Speaker 1: But what do you mean when you say you mean it?
Speaker 1: Like you're just like, oh, I just mean it, you know,
Speaker 1: Like can you put that into words?
Speaker 5: Can you describe the love in the words?
Speaker 2: Yes? If if you needed something, I would try to
Speaker 2: do what I can to provide. Yeah, somebody that if
Speaker 2: something happened to you, I would be very affected. Yeah,
Speaker 2: even though very affected, I would I would absolutely be
Speaker 2: affected if something happened to geth Right.
Speaker 5: Now, yes, exactly.
Speaker 3: It would be very affected.
Speaker 2: Oh God, like me and Garrick. I met him when
Speaker 2: I went to when we were at San Francisco for
Speaker 2: the up Next Comedy Central, and me and Garrick talked
Speaker 2: at the after party for most of the time and
Speaker 2: we just like clicked or whatever. And then I always
Speaker 2: made sure I kept in contact with him, and you know,
Speaker 2: I felt like, oh man, I'm really good at keeping
Speaker 2: in contact with people. But he could have been shady
Speaker 2: and been like, I'm busy. You know, I'm in these writers' rooms.
Speaker 2: I don't have time. But he was always cool and
Speaker 2: he took me out to lunch, got me ramen.
Speaker 1: Yeah, soak, I think Okay, So I think that the
Speaker 1: barometer for me is if someone were to kill you
Speaker 1: and I saw them in a courtroom and I didn't
Speaker 1: go like fucking crazy or buck while like in like
Speaker 1: those SBU episodes, that means.
Speaker 5: That I love you or that means that I don't
Speaker 5: love you.
Speaker 1: If I can just watch them walk past and be like, oh, yeah,
Speaker 1: that's crazy that they killed my friend. But I mean
Speaker 1: I got to be a witness, you know.
Speaker 2: Well, if you.
Speaker 3: Happened in front of you, I think maybe you would
Speaker 3: be more emotional. But my thing is this. We hung
Speaker 3: out in San Francisco. We've had ramen together a couple
Speaker 3: of times. I'm saying I love you.
Speaker 4: Wait, yeah, Sidney, did you say I love you after
Speaker 4: that first meeting at the end of that first no, no, no, no.
Speaker 2: This is like years later, that's that's been hours ago.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: I probably said I love you, like you know, two
Speaker 2: years after our friends.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's still it's weird to me, babe. I mean
Speaker 3: I would watch sid Can Cook and you would say
Speaker 3: love you to everything.
Speaker 1: Everything. You can't do that. It was like, you can't
Speaker 1: do that.
Speaker 4: You brought me, you brought me on for a second
Speaker 4: for sid Can Cook, and at the end of it,
Speaker 4: you say I love you and I just left. I
Speaker 4: was like, and then people in the chat were like,
Speaker 4: he didn't say it back, and I was like, I don't.
Speaker 4: I don't know, I don't know what to do, right,
Speaker 4: But like that's I'm kind of stuck in a bye.
Speaker 1: Yeah, but it's very funny.
Speaker 3: Pressure on other people to say it back, and it's like,
Speaker 3: that's not that Andrew. I don't know what your background is,
Speaker 3: but I feel like you got one of those moms
Speaker 3: that didn't say it a lot, or she didn't say
Speaker 3: it yeah right, So like everybody is not as free
Speaker 3: with saying the words I love you. But it's also
Speaker 3: different when you say love you as opposed to I
Speaker 3: love you, right, or sometimes somebody throw back like a
Speaker 3: love you, and then you be like love you, and
Speaker 3: you're like love you.
Speaker 1: But it's very nice. I don't want to sound unappreciative.
Speaker 2: All your niggas about you.
Speaker 1: Next next time you say love you, I'm just gonna
Speaker 1: say why.
Speaker 3: I'm going to say, prove it.
Speaker 1: Prove it I did right?
Speaker 5: Now, would you avenge me? It's a real question.
Speaker 3: How much would you set the limit to my goal fundme?
Speaker 2: Well, I would want it to be realistic, So I
Speaker 2: don't want to say, you know, one hundred thousand dollars
Speaker 2: if I know, if I know, your followers ain't got
Speaker 2: it like that. But Maria is you know, very verified,
Speaker 2: and she has people who are obsessed, so I know
Speaker 2: that she would get the money. And Garrick, I mean,
Speaker 2: you know nothing but successful people in LA, so they.
Speaker 1: Would would still not give one hundred thousand dollars to my.
Speaker 3: Let's set at the thirty six thirty six fields so.
Speaker 1: Yeah, enough, because it's enough to cover.
Speaker 5: The funeral costs. You know, we like that's all I need.
Speaker 3: We hold that casket? Is how much? How much is
Speaker 3: a casket?
Speaker 2: I want my friend. I want my friends going home,
Speaker 2: going away party, dope, Okay. I don't want to skim.
Speaker 2: I don't want to be cheap. I don't want to
Speaker 2: get you a regular old box. You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 2: I want you to get to get you nice flowers.
Speaker 2: I want to be a good funeral.
Speaker 3: Home top shell, embodied fluid.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I want that. I want the embombing fluid to
Speaker 2: have dul Say in it, you know what I mean?
Speaker 1: Like I just put put me in the ground raw,
Speaker 1: like I don't need.
Speaker 3: Garbage bags?
Speaker 2: Are you serious? No way No.
Speaker 3: I think I want to be cremated.
Speaker 1: But that's expensive too, isn't they up the.
Speaker 2: Car thousands of dollars?
Speaker 3: I want to be I want to be cremated, and
Speaker 3: I want people to be able to follow along with
Speaker 3: the body's journey like a Domino's pizza. Like I want
Speaker 3: them to be like they putting they putting the toppings on,
Speaker 3: the the lashes on, like I want yeah to be
Speaker 3: like Davante is working on the booty neck, like just
Speaker 3: that's what I want.
Speaker 2: His funeral is a big deal in like like parents
Speaker 2: who are immigrants.
Speaker 3: I'll tell you, I'll tell you what a big deal
Speaker 3: was for me. Church school, That was it. Church and school, Church,
Speaker 3: church and school, school, church, family, that's it.
Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, I've never seen a group of people more
Speaker 1: upset about the separation of church and state than immigrants,
Speaker 1: you know, like they want they want church to govern
Speaker 1: the rest of everybody else's lives.
Speaker 5: So like church was the biggest deal.
Speaker 3: I feel like you guys went to Sunday school.
Speaker 2: No, you went to school on Saturday, Saturday, Saturday school,
Speaker 2: Saturday school.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it sucks, I'm sorry. Like it called it Sabbath school.
Speaker 1: So we observed the Sabbath like Jewish people do. So
Speaker 1: Friday nights everything had to be cut off. No secular
Speaker 1: activity until suns It was secular noun, secular, no fun, nothing,
Speaker 1: nothing at all until Saturday night. So that period of
Speaker 1: time sunset to sunset, we were just.
Speaker 5: Miserable.
Speaker 1: Honestly, y'all were reading what just anything, watching TBN, watching
Speaker 1: children's uh fucking Christian activity movies or whatever that details.
Speaker 1: Mister bean, we couldn't even watch mister Bean though. I like,
Speaker 1: we couldn't do anything.
Speaker 2: And when did y'all when were you able to.
Speaker 1: Escape Saturday night?
Speaker 2: No? I mean, I mean like when you didn't have
Speaker 2: to do you didn't have to observe any sun down.
Speaker 1: I was out, I was gone. I stopped going fucking
Speaker 1: when I moved out twenty three, So all.
Speaker 3: Through high school to go to parties on Friday nights.
Speaker 1: No Friday night parties. So like when everybody was like,
Speaker 1: oh man, I can't wait for the weekend, you know,
Speaker 1: all that shit, nothing that I was not even excited.
Speaker 3: It was just like, well, I got to buy candlelight.
Speaker 1: I've gotta be yes exactly, just like reading the Bible
Speaker 1: and just trying not to get the candle on the
Speaker 1: page and so just burst into flames.
Speaker 2: Derek, how are you so cool now? Like you I'm not.
Speaker 2: I am not. You've only had a short period to
Speaker 2: like get your swag together, get close like you have style,
Speaker 2: you know how. I'm sure you lost your virginity late
Speaker 2: in the game.
Speaker 1: Late in the game. Oh god, I was twenty one, but.
Speaker 3: You were so you were still so but you lost
Speaker 3: your virginity on Thursday because.
Speaker 1: I couldn't. Yeah, I couldn't go out right, I couldn't
Speaker 1: go out, So.
Speaker 2: You were losing your virginity like during the working.
Speaker 1: It sucks. Yeah. It wasn't even like a party situation.
Speaker 1: It was like in a park, fucking I was upset.
Speaker 3: You were upset?
Speaker 1: Was she? She was upset as well.
Speaker 2: She didn't have a bed to land. What was this
Speaker 2: on a park bench?
Speaker 1: What this was?
Speaker 4: Like?
Speaker 1: We're we're both at home, so it was either her
Speaker 1: place or my place, or her parents place or my
Speaker 1: parents place.
Speaker 5: We were just like, what about this park?
Speaker 1: And in a in our car, and it's like, let's
Speaker 1: make this as special as possible. And she wasn't. She
Speaker 1: wasn't a virgin.
Speaker 2: I was so so a thirty five year old woman?
Speaker 2: Were you?
Speaker 3: I was taking an I was Oh did she know
Speaker 3: you were a virgin before?
Speaker 1: I mean I mean yeah, yeah she did. After she
Speaker 1: was just like, oh, why are you? Why are you
Speaker 1: moving like that? Why are you so robotic? What's going on?
Speaker 3: Because we're in a Toyota Corolla. That's why I'm moving.
Speaker 1: To use the car as an excuse with.
Speaker 2: The seat all the way back, so like that's moving
Speaker 2: weird m.
Speaker 3: Hm in their acted.
Speaker 1: Please just think there's a backseat of a Pontiac G five.
Speaker 1: So it was a two door and we both had
Speaker 1: to like scrunch into the back and just like that
Speaker 1: sounds try try hard.
Speaker 2: You are odd. I'm gonna say that you're odd.
Speaker 1: I I'm glad you're I'm glad you're getting to know me.
Speaker 2: Every time I like have hung out with you, or
Speaker 2: like I see the stuff that you post him, Like
Speaker 2: you know, he's a very reserve person but fun, but
Speaker 2: like nobody knows your business like that and then they
Speaker 2: know it now, well that's listen to this. Yeah, but
Speaker 2: I think that makes you human. I don't like people
Speaker 2: who are too secretive and make things like such a
Speaker 2: big deal. And I think that's the problem with like parents.
Speaker 2: Sometimes they're like they keep things so secretive. So I
Speaker 2: know nothing about my mom. I know nothing nothing, how
Speaker 2: she grew up, barely know how my grandmother like came
Speaker 2: about of even getting pregnant and having my mom. It's like,
Speaker 2: tell your story. Your story is important.
Speaker 3: Honestly, I don't know. Before you said that, I never
Speaker 3: even thought about my pregnant.
Speaker 1: Yeah. Wow, I just had to sit here and think
Speaker 1: about what my grandma's first name. Was like, it's like,
Speaker 1: what is it? Is it?
Speaker 5: It's Elaine.
Speaker 2: I was like, Oh, it's beautiful and she's Trinidadian. Yeah,
Speaker 2: do you speak Trinidadian to your it?
Speaker 1: The sing the sing song comes out when I'm at home.
Speaker 2: Can you give us an example?
Speaker 3: Absolutely, Pretend you're talking about the garret to the store.
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna I'm not gonna do that for my
Speaker 1: your fucking thousands of followers.
Speaker 3: It's not for you. It's actually it's for us.
Speaker 1: I'm so sorry, undreds of thousands of followers. I can't
Speaker 1: do this. I'm so sorry. I can't be that guy.
Speaker 1: I can't be that person.
Speaker 2: I just I don't know any Triadian people. So I
Speaker 2: just want to know.
Speaker 1: I mean, I mean, you can google it.
Speaker 5: You gotta know trities. I think, well, they'll let you
Speaker 5: know if they're also any.
Speaker 2: Well you didn't, you didn't, you didn't. This is the
Speaker 2: first time.
Speaker 1: I mean, well, if they're if they're from there, I'm
Speaker 1: from I'm born Los Angeles, so like, I'm not. I'm
Speaker 1: not going to come out here and be like, yo,
Speaker 1: I'm dad. I've been in the fucking bad lands all
Speaker 1: that ship. It just doesn't work. It doesn't work. It's
Speaker 1: like you're you're a coon. Do that, you know, say
Speaker 1: you're from where you're from and then let people have,
Speaker 1: uh have their origin. You know.
Speaker 3: Do you have siblings?
Speaker 1: I do.
Speaker 5: I'm the youngest of three of an older sister, older brother. Yeah.
Speaker 2: Oh and they're proud of you, they have to.
Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, they're the ones who were like you should
Speaker 1: probably I dropped out of school. I dropped out a.
Speaker 5: Yeah, I know that was a big.
Speaker 3: Tim that was trinidaddy, And you dropped a seven day advances.
Speaker 2: You Yes, Okay. We're forty seven minutes in the podcast
Speaker 2: and Garrett just dropped the bomb on us that he
Speaker 2: did not finish school.
Speaker 5: Didn't finish from an.
Speaker 1: College, from an immigrant home. Kept it a secret until
Speaker 1: I moved out.
Speaker 2: What happened?
Speaker 1: So I was I was going to school for two
Speaker 1: years doing like mechanical engineering, and that's like you know,
Speaker 1: the thing that can get your parents love or whatever.
Speaker 3: Yes, yes, yes, doctor lawyer, engineer.
Speaker 1: That's engineering.
Speaker 5: That's it's only the three Yeah.
Speaker 3: Doing that.
Speaker 1: Went to the Improv and just like sat there at
Speaker 1: their open mics on Tuesdays and I was just like,
Speaker 1: maybe I should fucking try doing this and I would
Speaker 1: just go every Tuesday. And then one time I remember
Speaker 1: bringing up that maybe I wanted to switch to be
Speaker 1: a lip major so that I can get like, you know,
Speaker 1: the pen game down and all that shit, and they
Speaker 1: were like no, and so I uh, I was like,
Speaker 1: all right, let me go back to school. And then
Speaker 1: they were like, you have to apply for loans now
Speaker 1: because you're about to declare a major and all that stuff.
Speaker 1: And I was like, I don't think I want to
Speaker 1: do that, and I left and then I lied about
Speaker 1: it for two or three years.
Speaker 3: Not two or three years. Yeah, yeah, so how long
Speaker 3: were you in school? For a year?
Speaker 1: No, like two years?
Speaker 2: It's fine, that's fine. It took me four years to realize, Yeah,
Speaker 2: this shit ain't for me. I mean, my school kicked
Speaker 2: me out, but.
Speaker 1: It took me four years, fair enough.
Speaker 2: And it took me four years, and we're like, you know,
Speaker 2: maybe this is not really for me at all.
Speaker 3: You got a doubt for your last semester.
Speaker 2: No, I got kicked out. No, not my last semester.
Speaker 2: It was the first semester of my senior year. But
Speaker 2: I don't even know if I had enough credits to
Speaker 2: be a senior. But I got kicked out for plagiarism.
Speaker 5: Oh shit, yeah.
Speaker 3: Everybody plagiarizes, but you got caught.
Speaker 2: I got caught. I was so bad at it. I
Speaker 2: had never plagiarized before. This was my first time out
Speaker 2: the gate, out in the game of plagiarizing, and I
Speaker 2: immediately got caught. And my professor was furious. He's like,
Speaker 2: what do you think I'm fucking stupid? Then he said
Speaker 2: I was like. I was like, I said, I hope
Speaker 2: I can go to the dean and let them know
Speaker 2: and maybe this will let me stay here. But no,
Speaker 2: they were like, it doesn't matter that he cursed at
Speaker 2: you have you have to get the.
Speaker 3: Fun curse because you did something wrong. Yeah, that is
Speaker 3: so wild. Plagiarizing. You know, you gotta switch some words around.
Speaker 3: You gotta look up synonyms and antonyms, and then if
Speaker 3: you google something, you can't go to the first page,
Speaker 3: first result. You gotta squaw.
Speaker 2: First result. Bitch. Just I was desperate. I just needed
Speaker 2: to turn something in.
Speaker 3: You know how many people have turned in that exact
Speaker 3: paper that you turned in.
Speaker 2: That's what he said. He said, I've been doing this
Speaker 2: for twenty years. You think I don't know about this,
Speaker 2: I said, sir, I've I was in a really bad place.
Speaker 2: I was like, I'm depressed. And that was the first
Speaker 2: time a white person just had no response to depression.
Speaker 3: They were like, that is insane. So, Garrett, where were
Speaker 3: you going for those three years you were leaving the
Speaker 3: house to pretend to go to school. Where was you going?
Speaker 1: Yeah? I was working at j C. Penny trying to get.
Speaker 5: Enough money to fucking bove out and wine.
Speaker 3: Yeah, so you heeded, but you were still going to
Speaker 3: You were going to work.
Speaker 1: Yeah. I was like, I was like, oh, mom, I'm
Speaker 1: i'm'a fucking work just to like get enough for the
Speaker 1: for school and all this stuff and to live and
Speaker 1: buy clothes and any excuse I could think of. And
Speaker 1: then I was just doing like hell of shifts at
Speaker 1: jac Fenny or Cole's or anything that would hire me
Speaker 1: for like the season or something like that. A seasonal
Speaker 1: work ac seasonal? Yes, Yes, well, absolutely.
Speaker 2: Well, from j C Pennies to shooting a freaking pilot
Speaker 2: in Atlanta. You're like, you're doing great.
Speaker 1: I looked out. Yeah, yeah, yeah, what are you working
Speaker 1: on now?
Speaker 3: And how your parents feel about it?
Speaker 1: They feel great right now? They're They definitely have brought
Speaker 1: up that I should have stayed in engineering school. I mean,
Speaker 1: you would have been great at it, right, And I
Speaker 1: was like, Mom, I'm I could buy the house right now,
Speaker 1: like I can, I can finish the more you like,
Speaker 1: we can't listen, But.
Speaker 2: Is that so garys okay?
Speaker 1: Well no, no, no, no, no, not at all.
Speaker 3: I was.
Speaker 1: I was one hundred percent trying to flex on my
Speaker 1: on my mom and she's like, I don't give a fuck.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't know why school is so important to
Speaker 3: our parents. I don't know they from a different time.
Speaker 3: But like I was talking to my dad about I
Speaker 3: think Beyonce didn't finish high school and my dad was like, unbelievable,
Speaker 3: she should go back and finished. And I was like,
Speaker 3: she's worth half a billion dollars and he was like,
Speaker 3: she don't know nothing, and I was like, whoa to
Speaker 3: be high? He's gonna come catch it up.
Speaker 1: Yeah, they're coming, and now that they know that, they're
Speaker 1: coming hard.
Speaker 2: But like, good, it's a good thing that she doesn't
Speaker 2: know anything because she doesn't say much either, So she's fine.
Speaker 2: Y'all really left me out there to drive.
Speaker 3: Y'all about to drive? I mean, lots of people didn't
Speaker 3: finish school, and they're they're all richer than us. They're
Speaker 3: richer than most of the population. Actually, they're smarter than
Speaker 3: most of the population. Because staying in school and taking
Speaker 3: out unnecessary loans and stuff that you're paying until you're
Speaker 3: fifty sixty seventy years old is dumb. Which is why that,
Speaker 3: which is why I do not pay. I ignore them
Speaker 3: every I got them on the do not call list.
Speaker 2: Well, before we get out of here, Garrick, if you
Speaker 2: have like three things that are like misconceptions about like
Speaker 2: immigrant parents or children of immigrant parents, I would love
Speaker 2: to hear misconceptions.
Speaker 1: Now, y'all got it right for the most part. You
Speaker 1: guys got it right. It's fine.
Speaker 5: No, I uh, gold is great, it's real good.
Speaker 1: Go eat it ship. We're not lame. I guess do
Speaker 1: y'all cheat?
Speaker 2: Do they cheat? Y'all cheat a lot. Stop it.
Speaker 5: My niggas cheat. I don't, I don't, he said his nigga.
Speaker 3: Well, you know you are the company.
Speaker 5: My career be niggas.
Speaker 3: Oh, oh, here's I have a question for you before
Speaker 3: you go. Yeah, as as the child of immigrants, did
Speaker 3: you get money from the tooth fairy and how much
Speaker 3: were they giving you because these white kids and some
Speaker 3: of these black kids are getting like they.
Speaker 1: Cannot I cannot believe that that ship is still going
Speaker 1: on they were immediately or that's just fake. God is
Speaker 1: the only thing that's real, Santa Claus, all of it.
Speaker 1: I remember my dad because he's in construction. He made
Speaker 1: me take a tape measure, go to the chimney, measure
Speaker 1: the chimney and say do you think a man could
Speaker 1: fit down there? He put you on the roof and
Speaker 1: its just no, no, no, no underneath yeah, yeah.
Speaker 3: You on the roof.
Speaker 1: He's like, nobody could fit in here. So of course
Speaker 1: that's not.
Speaker 3: Too fat to fist.
Speaker 1: It was nine. It was nine asking for cookies. So
Speaker 1: to you know, it's like I bought this ship, you know,
Speaker 1: I bought all of this.
Speaker 3: Yo, that's funny. So you didn't get any money. You
Speaker 3: didn't get like a quarter under the pillow or nothing
Speaker 3: like that like that.
Speaker 1: I didn't get a quarter. I didn't get any of that.
Speaker 1: And a lot of my teeth fell out at the
Speaker 1: same time. So they were going to give you a
Speaker 1: quarter for anyway.
Speaker 3: They said that looked like that, like at least a
Speaker 3: dollar fifty right there, yeah, right right.
Speaker 5: Now, that's going to the mortgage again.
Speaker 3: With my tooth under the pillow. And I woke up,
Speaker 3: the tooth was still.
Speaker 1: That's real ship like, that's exactly what yo.
Speaker 3: They give me nothing. I was like, ohh and I
Speaker 3: think they had that move where she looked at my
Speaker 3: dad and he looked at her. But both of them
Speaker 3: knew they weren't going to give me money, so nobody
Speaker 3: went into the room to take the.
Speaker 2: Tooth I got. I got money from like my great
Speaker 2: aunt and uncles, but the quarters were so dingy. It
Speaker 2: was like it was like it had been in their
Speaker 2: pockets for years. It was no new money, no new
Speaker 2: money at all. It's just like if they did give
Speaker 2: me a dollar, it was something that had written numbers
Speaker 2: written on it, maybe somebody's address, just real fucked up.
Speaker 2: They would have like their medication prescription on there. It's
Speaker 2: just real messy with the with the coinage and the dollars.
Speaker 2: But at least I got more money than y'all.
Speaker 1: So that's very true.
Speaker 3: And that's why you're able to live in the lap
Speaker 3: of luxury now, sis, and you can afford all those
Speaker 3: cats that live in your house and for that, I'm
Speaker 3: proud of you. Sis.
Speaker 2: Thank you here, thank you, thank you Grek for being
Speaker 2: such an amazing guess if you have anything a plug
Speaker 2: plug plug away where people can catch your ass.
Speaker 1: Yeah, oh I'm I'm a garb r on Instagram, Twitter,
Speaker 1: all that whatever, Watch Solar Opposites and Star Trek Lower
Speaker 1: dex when you ever get a chance. Solar Opposites is
Speaker 1: on Hulu, Start Lord dex Is on Paramount Plus.
Speaker 3: Yes, Sam okay, booked, busy, blessed, blick, Okay. Well, I
Speaker 3: think it's time for you to go to work, so
Speaker 3: I guess we'll let you go. What do we say
Speaker 3: to Garret before he leaves?
Speaker 1: Thank you?
Speaker 3: No, Andrew, that's the wrong answer.
Speaker 2: I love it.
Speaker 6: I love you, my guy forever.
Speaker 1: This has been a Forever Dog production. The Unofficial Expert
Speaker 1: is Executive.
Speaker 3: Produced by Brett Bohem, Joe.
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