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Speaker 1: Hey, this is Sam. This is a John your og

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Speaker 1: Okay Storytime podcast host, and we got some great stories

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Speaker 1: coming up. Before that, we have a quick two minute

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Speaker 1: break from the sponsors that keep the show a lot.

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Speaker 2: My best friend secretly planned her wedding the day before mine.

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Speaker 3: Ah, there's so many other days that you could choose

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Speaker 3: from girl.

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Speaker 2: You could have done that, and we could have not

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Speaker 2: praying to you. But it's April freaking fools.

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Speaker 3: April flippity flipp and fools.

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Speaker 2: So there you freaking go. So I'm getting married in

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Speaker 2: a few weeks. And about a month ago, one of

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Speaker 2: my best friends, who I've known since college and I've

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Speaker 2: kept in regular contact with, dropped the that she was

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Speaker 2: getting married. I didn't even know she was seeing anyone.

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Speaker 2: By the way, this comes from Tiny birds Nest, and

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Speaker 2: if you want to submit your own stories, go to

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Speaker 2: Arsasha Okay Storytime. So she then drops lot that she's

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Speaker 2: marrying a guy in our friend group and that her

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Speaker 2: wedding is going to have to be the day before

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Speaker 2: mine because her father in law can't get time off

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Speaker 2: from work on any other time that month, and essentially

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Speaker 2: gave a few other half bootied reasons about why other

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Speaker 2: weekends were impossible. One weekend would be a few days

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Speaker 2: before her period started, so she'll be bloated, okay o.

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Speaker 2: The other she's on her period. The other is Valentine's

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Speaker 2: weekend and ugh, that's cringey. And then the other one

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Speaker 2: is too close to Ramadan so she can't go on

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Speaker 2: her honeymoon straight away. Some backstory about the person she

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Speaker 2: is marrying. She is someone that we always thought she

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Speaker 2: had a thing with, but she would always deny it

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Speaker 2: and say that she saw him like a brother. We

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Speaker 2: used to argue a bit over her prioritizing him over

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Speaker 2: me back in college, especially because this guy and I

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Speaker 2: didn't really get along that much.

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Speaker 3: Her and I were so close.

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Speaker 2: Example, me and her had brunch plans once and she

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Speaker 2: spent the entire time texting him. After graduation, though, I

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Speaker 2: felt like we all matured and put differences behind us,

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Speaker 2: to the point where her husband to be was actually

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Speaker 2: invited to my wedding as my friend, and my knucklehead

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Speaker 2: reaction to her telling me she was engaged was crying

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Speaker 2: tears of joy for her. I truly was happy for her,

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Speaker 2: but when I went home to think about it, felt

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Speaker 2: really itchy. All year since I've been wedding planning, she's

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Speaker 2: been asking me really specific questions about my planning process.

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Speaker 2: She complained to me that as my best friend, she

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Speaker 2: didn't feel involved enough in my planning process and said

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Speaker 2: that she wanted to come dress shopping with me, which

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Speaker 2: I invited her to because of her expressing this. But

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Speaker 2: then for her to turn around and tell me that

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Speaker 2: she's been dating this guy on and off for a

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Speaker 2: year while also keeping it secret, making her feeling left

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Speaker 2: out of my stuff comes across as hypocritical. And then

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Speaker 2: there's a question of why rush since she's known him

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Speaker 2: a decade, and why specifically my wedding weekend When I

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Speaker 2: sent out my Save the dates back in March, so

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Speaker 2: she's had a lot of time to plan and leave

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Speaker 2: some time in between ours. It's not about me having

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Speaker 2: all the attention on me. It's just how can she

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Speaker 2: expect me to be fully present at her wedding the

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Speaker 2: day before her own, and how selfish she must be

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Speaker 2: to expect me to fit her into an already stressful weekend.

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Speaker 2: When I told her this, she doubled down on the

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Speaker 2: weekend that she chose being the only one available, that

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Speaker 2: she specifically chose that one because she knew I'd be

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Speaker 2: available since I'd booked a few days off of work

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Speaker 2: before the wedding, and that she needed me at her wedding.

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Speaker 2: She said that I would embarrass her around her future

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Speaker 2: in laws since she made such a point of needing

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Speaker 2: to pick a date that I could attend, even though

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Speaker 2: I had no clue she was even seeing this guy,

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Speaker 2: nor did she check in if the day was a

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Speaker 2: good fit for me before picking it. I then also

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Speaker 2: expressed how upset I was that she kept the relationship

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Speaker 2: hidden from me, to which she said she thought I'd

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Speaker 2: cut her off because of my history not getting along

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Speaker 2: with this guy.

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Speaker 3: Again.

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Speaker 2: We all moved past that stuff years ago and are

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Speaker 2: a far cry from the kids we were when we

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Speaker 2: all met back in freshman year. When I told her

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Speaker 2: I didn't think I could make her wedding, she was

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Speaker 2: so upset she cried and said she never thought I'd

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Speaker 2: do that to her and skip her wedding. She's been

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Speaker 2: telling other friends in the friend group that I'm coming

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Speaker 2: to the wedding when they've asked if the date was

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Speaker 2: doable for me. We haven't spoken sense up. My conversation

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Speaker 2: about how upset with her I was a month ago.

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Speaker 2: I'm not trying to be a bridezilla, and I know

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Speaker 2: people are entitled to be private. My issue is that

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Speaker 2: she should have extended that privacy with me and not

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Speaker 2: ask so many questions about my life, knowing she was

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Speaker 2: being so tight lipped with hers. This is where I

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Speaker 2: now need advice. I feel so bitter and like the

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Speaker 2: whole friendship was a lie. I can't make it to

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Speaker 2: her wedding, and honestly having her mind feels disingenuous. She

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Speaker 2: has been telling friends she is still coming to mind.

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Speaker 2: Is it rude for me to not go to her wedding?

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Speaker 2: Should I go to her wedding? Since this is a

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Speaker 2: decade long friendship, part of me wants to disinvite her

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Speaker 2: and her husband to be from my wedding because of

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Speaker 2: the lies.

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Speaker 3: Is that rude?

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Speaker 2: And is there a polite way to disinvise someone from

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Speaker 2: your wedding without coming across like the villain so many questions.

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Speaker 3: I'd think if their wedding is the day before yours,

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Speaker 3: they're probably not going to your wedding either.

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Speaker 2: I mean, allegedly we haven't gotten like a explicit. It

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Speaker 2: seems like she's implying that she would make it to

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Speaker 2: her wedding too.

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Speaker 3: I think a liar. That is such a lie. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: but we have an update.

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Speaker 2: A few people in the original post were asking about

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Speaker 2: rehearsal dinners and all that stuff. I'm Middle Eastern and

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Speaker 2: we don't really do that in our culture. Some people

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Speaker 2: also said I needed to get over myself and that

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Speaker 2: I don't own the whole weekend, which is true.

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Speaker 3: I don't.

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Speaker 2: My issue was the lying, and also the expectation for

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Speaker 2: me to drive a total of five hours two and

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Speaker 2: a half hours each way there and back the day

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Speaker 2: before my wedding, and to attend another when I had

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Speaker 2: so many things to finalize.

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Speaker 3: I also just.

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Speaker 2: Needed tovent being lied to and having something that felt

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Speaker 2: so calculated happened and what I thought was one of

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Speaker 2: my closest friendships is strange. Oh and I don't think

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Speaker 2: it was a pipew wedding, which a lot of people

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Speaker 2: were suggesting. Anyways, had my wedding, it was perfect and

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Speaker 2: I wouldn't change a thing. I didn't go to her

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Speaker 2: wedding because I genuinely didn't have the time. I did

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Speaker 2: see some videos posted of her wedding. She didn't copy mine,

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Speaker 2: which a lot of people were worried about, considering she'd

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Speaker 2: been asking me for all of the prep, so I'll

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Speaker 2: give her flowers. Though her wedding was gorgeous, uh, definitely

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Speaker 2: not a two month planned wedding like she was making

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Speaker 2: it out to me. In the end, she ended up

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Speaker 2: coming to my wedding about three hours late. I was

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Speaker 2: too busy being in our newly married bubble to notice

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Speaker 2: her or anything, but I did get feedback from people

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Speaker 2: who were sat at her table. Like people said she

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Speaker 2: would in my original post, she spent the whole time

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Speaker 2: talking about her wedding.

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Speaker 1: In our culture, the bride receives a heavy piece of

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Speaker 1: gold jewelry at her wedding. She made a show of

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Speaker 1: her having her new husband take a piece of the

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Speaker 1: jewelry out of her bag and putting it on her

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Speaker 1: at the table just after my husband and I feel

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Speaker 1: so nice, saying that did our outfit change.

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Speaker 3: She was also showing off other.

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Speaker 2: Pieces of jewelry that she received, making a point to

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Speaker 2: emphasize that she received real soophiles and real domo.

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Speaker 3: That's so cool that you have human suffering generals.

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Speaker 2: Nice congratulations, grats her and her husband also spent the

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Speaker 2: whole time texting each other, which means they were probably

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Speaker 2: saying not very nice things that they didn't want our

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Speaker 2: mutual friends overhearing, and she frequently would turn to him

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Speaker 2: and say, don't worry, we're leaving soon. They were also

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Speaker 2: packing on the PDA with neck kisses. She also then

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Speaker 2: cried to my mom and brother about how she doesn't

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Speaker 2: understand why I've not been taught talking to her and

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Speaker 2: how I've been so cold to her.

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Speaker 1: This wasn't true. I had only told her how much

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Speaker 1: her actions and lives had hurt me, and to be honest,

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Speaker 1: she was the one who didn't respond to my last message.

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Speaker 1: My mom, being the classic mom she is, brought her

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Speaker 1: to me and tried to make us hug it out.

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Speaker 1: We have a very awkward exchange caught on care.

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Speaker 4: I really wish we could get that.

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Speaker 3: I want to see angry tp hug.

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Speaker 2: My mom did tell my friend that she shouldn't have

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Speaker 2: lied to me for a whole year, though, so it's

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Speaker 2: nice to know that she had my back, even if

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Speaker 2: she pulled the typical mom move of just trying to

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Speaker 2: make everyone happy. Now our mutual friends are all on

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Speaker 2: my side, No one really thinks she's hit the right.

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Speaker 2: Thank God most of them didn't go to her wedding.

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Speaker 2: With the invites being so last minute and her wedding

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Speaker 2: being on a weekday, a lot of people.

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Speaker 3: Could take the cim off and get childcare. Of course, no.

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Speaker 2: One else knew about the wedding, which is crazy nobody.

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Speaker 2: I do believe that her truth is that she doesn't

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Speaker 2: think she's done anything wrong, and she really does think

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Speaker 2: that she considered me, an my situation in her wedding place.

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Speaker 2: She's kind of like not assuming what we are, Like,

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Speaker 2: she's not in the wrong.

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Speaker 3: Well, I think in a way, it's like, yeah, she

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Speaker 3: did consider you in her wedding plan, and she just

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Speaker 3: considered that she should be inconsiderate about it. Like, yeah,

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Speaker 3: she considered I'm I'm not going to care that her

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Speaker 3: wedding is tomorrow. It's too fishy. There's there's too many things.

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Speaker 2: You didn't care, There's too many things.

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Speaker 4: She just wants to party. Dude's like, you know, double

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Speaker 4: the double the fun, double the party, double the love.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, double it. She's like, I'm just trying to double

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Speaker 3: it and give it to the next purse. Yeah, she's

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Speaker 3: gonna get it.

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Speaker 2: She's gonna have another secret marriage in like a month.

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Speaker 4: Just inspiring you.

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Speaker 3: Op, he's got a twin. He's got a secret twin

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Speaker 3: nobody knows about. Oh, no, no, please.

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Speaker 2: Unfortunately, I think it's one of those friendships where we

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Speaker 2: no longer really line and I have taken a step

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Speaker 2: back and distanced myself from her. I do you appreciate

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Speaker 2: that she came to my wedding? However, I think she

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Speaker 2: did it to make a point more than out of

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Speaker 2: the goodness of her heart and respect for our friendship

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Speaker 2: considering what she pulled.

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Speaker 3: No, she showed up to your wedding to upstate. You like,

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Speaker 3: I appreciate that she came to my wedding. You shouldn't

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Speaker 3: she came to make it about her. Yeah, you don't

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Speaker 3: have to do that.

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Speaker 2: You don't have to do that, honestly, edited to adds

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Speaker 2: the more information that people were asking, and apparently it's

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Speaker 2: already in there.

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Speaker 3: It was already in there. They had edited it. Wow earlier.

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Speaker 3: That's crazy. Yeah. I don't know if OP is like

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Speaker 3: a sweety pie or if they're just like completely delusional

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Speaker 3: about this. Yeah, it's like not a whole lot to

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Speaker 3: be appreciative about. Her presence at your wedding.

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Speaker 2: I feel like she can she can be more almost

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Speaker 2: being like a hole to herself, like yeah, you deserve

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Speaker 2: to be I mean, you know, and she's like it

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Speaker 2: seems like she's politely distancing herself, which fair enough, fair enough?

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Speaker 5: Yeah, wow, like a weekday wedding one that's just like

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Speaker 5: crazy to me, Like surprise wedding, weekday, wedding day before

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Speaker 5: ope's wedding. Nobody goes like not everyone goes, yeah, what

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Speaker 5: do you expect, like two plus two equals four.

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Speaker 2: Nor her two plus two equals fish.

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Speaker 3: Yeah that's what this lady. Oh yeah, dude, Yeah, Aaron's

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Speaker 3: tell you how to make that work. My friend asked

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Speaker 3: me need to pick up his relatives across the country

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Speaker 3: on his wedding day. Well that's too far. And on

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Speaker 3: my wedding. My male thirty one friend, let's call him John,

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Speaker 3: male thirty five, is engaged to Alma, female thirty and

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Speaker 3: we'll have their wedding in May of twenty twenty five.

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Speaker 3: By the way, this comes from user am I the

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Speaker 3: a whole friendly throw and if you want to submit

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00:10:22,880 --> 00:10:26,400
Speaker 3: your own stories, go to the r slash Okay storytime subreddit.

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Speaker 3: John and I have been good friends for five years,

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Speaker 3: but we are a part of a larger friend group

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Speaker 3: that often travels, goes camping, spends weekends together, plays board games,

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Speaker 3: and just generally hangs out. We used to be a

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Speaker 3: tight knit group, or at least we were before John

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Speaker 3: met Alma two years ago. In this friend group, there's

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Speaker 3: also my girlfriend female twenty eight, and a couple Joseph

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Speaker 3: male thirty six and Anita female thirty four, who aren't

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Speaker 3: married but have been together for fourteen years. They come

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Speaker 3: from another city where they also met John and got

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Speaker 3: him into the friend group. Around ten years ago. John

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Speaker 3: and I became friends through a weird situation where he

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Speaker 3: was thrown out of his flat by an ex friend

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Speaker 3: who's female, but unrelated to this issue. We ended up

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Speaker 3: moving in together and became really good pals. John may

256
00:11:11,200 --> 00:11:14,720
Speaker 3: not be the best looking, chubby guy, but his charisma

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Speaker 3: and joking skills are very high. He has always tried

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Speaker 3: to flirt with waitresses or cashiers in hopes of landing

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Speaker 3: a serious, long term relationship. His experience has mostly been

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Speaker 3: with younger girls, and his relationships have always lasted only

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Speaker 3: a few months or less than a year. Then he

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Speaker 3: met Alma and fell head over heels. They seemed compatible,

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Speaker 3: and at least he was beaming with joy. However, we

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00:11:38,080 --> 00:11:40,560
Speaker 3: soon found out at a party when Alma went to

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Speaker 3: bed that John, in a wasted state, confessed that Alma

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Speaker 3: didn't like Anita because of the friendly relationship Anita and

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Speaker 3: John had. This seemed unreasonable, since we all know their

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Speaker 3: relationship is purely platonic and we're all loyal to our

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Speaker 3: other halves. After this, we started meeting John and Alma

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Speaker 3: less frequently, only for big cell like Christmas, in our

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Speaker 3: annual camping and boating trips, just events that are integral

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00:12:04,640 --> 00:12:07,559
Speaker 3: to our friendship. For any other event John was invited to,

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Speaker 3: we always got a decline, too tired, too busy, we

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Speaker 3: need to do something for Alma's family, or again, just

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Speaker 3: too tired. He never calls or texts either. At this point,

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Speaker 3: it's gotten so bad that we stopped inviting him, and

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Speaker 3: we feel bad about it. However, he only reaches out

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Speaker 3: when he needs something like a favor of some sort,

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Speaker 3: or to get stuff from our jobs for free, or

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Speaker 3: just to drop something off. Currently, John and Alma live

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Speaker 3: in a flat in the same building as Joseph and Anita,

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Speaker 3: and even then they are too tired to take the elevator.

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Speaker 3: We do miss our friend and would help him when necessary,

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Speaker 3: but at this point the lack of communication and the

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Speaker 3: rise and requests just makes me feel used. Now to

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Speaker 3: the situation at hand. Last week, John visited Joseph and

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Speaker 3: Anita unannounced to talk about the wedding and asked them

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Speaker 3: for help. Joseph is the best man, and he agreed

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Speaker 3: to be the driver for the groom and bride, taking

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Speaker 3: them from their home to the courthouse, then to the

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Speaker 3: venue and back home the next day. However, the maid

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Speaker 3: of honor is Alma's cousin, Mary, female twenty five, who's

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00:13:06,040 --> 00:13:09,199
Speaker 3: a cool and active person. She's joined us for camping

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Speaker 3: and other celebrations. John used his speech asking Anita to

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Speaker 3: undertake the task of decorating the whole venue with Mary's boyfriend.

296
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Speaker 3: After Anita questioned him for more details, it was clear

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Speaker 3: that nothing was planned. The venue would allow decorating to

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Speaker 3: start at two pm, but guests would arrive at five pm.

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Speaker 3: That is not enough time to decorate the whole place alone,

300
00:13:31,440 --> 00:13:34,960
Speaker 3: not even with two or four people. That's an impossible task.

301
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Speaker 3: Anita accepted, even though she feels like it's a crazy task.

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Speaker 3: From that conversation, they also understood that John believed I

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Speaker 3: had agreed to drive halfway across the country on the

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Speaker 3: day of the wedding to pick up four of his

305
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Speaker 3: relatives and drive them back, about a two hour drive

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Speaker 3: one way. However, my car isn't suitable for this, as

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00:13:51,840 --> 00:13:54,480
Speaker 3: it is a four seater, including the driver. John said

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00:13:54,520 --> 00:13:56,680
Speaker 3: that he would give me his car to drive, except

309
00:13:56,760 --> 00:13:59,160
Speaker 3: it has a different transmission and I have no experience

310
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Speaker 3: with driving it. I may have only ever tried reparking

311
00:14:01,760 --> 00:14:04,120
Speaker 3: a colleagues car, and that wasn't a great experience. My

312
00:14:04,200 --> 00:14:07,199
Speaker 3: girlfriend could do it, and she would accept if asked.

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00:14:07,360 --> 00:14:09,840
Speaker 3: Maybe she was asked during the Christmas party, but I

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00:14:09,920 --> 00:14:11,960
Speaker 3: have no memory of it. I'm not planning to spend

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00:14:11,960 --> 00:14:13,880
Speaker 3: the day driving, though, when I could help with the

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00:14:13,920 --> 00:14:16,800
Speaker 3: decorations or other smaller jobs. More than that, I feel

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00:14:16,800 --> 00:14:18,719
Speaker 3: like it's not okay for him to ask this when

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00:14:18,760 --> 00:14:21,960
Speaker 3: we are so distanced as friends and are barely even

319
00:14:21,960 --> 00:14:26,400
Speaker 3: acquaintances anymore. But here comes the peace day. Resistant there

320
00:14:26,520 --> 00:14:29,280
Speaker 3: is no wedding party and the invitations are not yet sent,

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00:14:29,400 --> 00:14:32,360
Speaker 3: so no guest really knows the date, time or place,

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Speaker 3: and John hasn't even reached out to me personally in

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00:14:35,240 --> 00:14:38,440
Speaker 3: any way, hasn't told directly of his plans for me

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00:14:38,760 --> 00:14:41,480
Speaker 3: or my girlfriend in this at all. So he's like, yeah,

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00:14:41,640 --> 00:14:43,400
Speaker 3: h you're gonna pick up five my family members or

326
00:14:43,400 --> 00:14:45,920
Speaker 3: four my family members. I don't have space, yea, don't worry.

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Speaker 3: And then one day I'll maybe I'll tell you what

328
00:14:47,560 --> 00:14:49,640
Speaker 3: day it is. One day. It's the Firefest of wedding.

329
00:14:49,720 --> 00:14:52,320
Speaker 3: This is Firefest wedding. This is Firefest two point zero.

330
00:14:52,320 --> 00:14:55,560
Speaker 3: All the information laid in the previous paragraph was a

331
00:14:55,720 --> 00:14:58,960
Speaker 3: retelling from Anita, And now I'm dreading the moment when

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00:14:59,040 --> 00:15:01,880
Speaker 3: John appears by my doorstep with this me denying his

333
00:15:01,960 --> 00:15:05,240
Speaker 3: requests will set him off, as he has seemed tense

334
00:15:05,320 --> 00:15:07,920
Speaker 3: and tired of wedding planning, if you could even call it.

335
00:15:08,040 --> 00:15:10,240
Speaker 3: That also feels like there's going to be an update

336
00:15:10,280 --> 00:15:12,240
Speaker 3: in the next two weeks since his birthday's coming up,

337
00:15:12,240 --> 00:15:14,600
Speaker 3: and Anita believes he will want to talk then, which

338
00:15:14,680 --> 00:15:18,160
Speaker 3: again probably will include booze and bad decisions. So please

339
00:15:18,160 --> 00:15:20,800
Speaker 3: suggest on how to better deal with John's request? And

340
00:15:20,840 --> 00:15:23,800
Speaker 3: am I the a hole for considering denying his request?

341
00:15:23,880 --> 00:15:26,120
Speaker 3: In driving across the country to pick up his relatives

342
00:15:26,160 --> 00:15:28,720
Speaker 3: while the rest of the wedding planning is in shambles.

343
00:15:28,920 --> 00:15:32,000
Speaker 3: There is an update. It has been a week since

344
00:15:32,000 --> 00:15:36,000
Speaker 3: the original post, and the update is he's visiting tomorrow

345
00:15:36,000 --> 00:15:38,360
Speaker 3: after work, as he offered it. When I met him

346
00:15:38,360 --> 00:15:40,920
Speaker 3: in the grocery store yesterday. He asked, how's it going,

347
00:15:41,080 --> 00:15:44,760
Speaker 3: and I told him truthfully see point four below. I

348
00:15:44,840 --> 00:15:47,720
Speaker 3: was hoping and was right that he wouldn't start the

349
00:15:47,760 --> 00:15:51,720
Speaker 3: whole conversation in the store, and so he kindly asked

350
00:15:51,800 --> 00:15:54,640
Speaker 3: if he could visit tomorrow to deliver the wedding invitations

351
00:15:54,680 --> 00:15:57,600
Speaker 3: by hand and stuff, but didn't specify, so I'm afraid

352
00:15:57,680 --> 00:16:01,320
Speaker 3: what the stuff is possibly to talk about chores he

353
00:16:01,400 --> 00:16:04,200
Speaker 3: wants us to do. Meanwhile, I thought i'd make an

354
00:16:04,280 --> 00:16:07,400
Speaker 3: edit update, not sure exactly how it works. Point number

355
00:16:07,400 --> 00:16:10,360
Speaker 3: one for those wondering. We were close friends back in

356
00:16:10,440 --> 00:16:13,080
Speaker 3: the day. When John was evicted from his flat, I

357
00:16:13,120 --> 00:16:15,360
Speaker 3: helped him by allowing him to stay at my parents'

358
00:16:15,360 --> 00:16:17,200
Speaker 3: place for a few weeks while he was looking for

359
00:16:17,280 --> 00:16:20,720
Speaker 3: a new place, and consequentially, this is what led us

360
00:16:20,800 --> 00:16:23,640
Speaker 3: to become roommates. As I was also fresh out of

361
00:16:23,640 --> 00:16:25,920
Speaker 3: a relationship back then and looking for a new place.

362
00:16:26,080 --> 00:16:29,560
Speaker 3: Long story short, we know pretty well each other's allergies

363
00:16:29,800 --> 00:16:32,920
Speaker 3: are close family members, et cetera. Point number two. Since

364
00:16:32,960 --> 00:16:36,080
Speaker 3: I have no living grandparents and only one aunt, uncle

365
00:16:36,120 --> 00:16:38,760
Speaker 3: and cousin, it's quite impossible to make up a reason

366
00:16:38,840 --> 00:16:41,720
Speaker 3: several months in advance for us not attending. Culturally speaking,

367
00:16:41,800 --> 00:16:44,320
Speaker 3: we don't have such big family gatherings unless there's a

368
00:16:44,320 --> 00:16:47,800
Speaker 3: wedding or a funeral. Number three regarding the time spent

369
00:16:47,840 --> 00:16:50,520
Speaker 3: while driving, this is Europe and it's a small country.

370
00:16:50,560 --> 00:16:53,760
Speaker 3: It literally takes seven to eight hours to drive across

371
00:16:53,800 --> 00:16:57,520
Speaker 3: the whole country, so casual Sunday drivers I even walk

372
00:16:57,600 --> 00:17:00,400
Speaker 3: to my work as it's so close, like me, are

373
00:17:00,440 --> 00:17:03,600
Speaker 3: not used to driving such distances. Also, no other guest

374
00:17:03,640 --> 00:17:05,920
Speaker 3: would be traveling as much as I would that day

375
00:17:06,000 --> 00:17:08,359
Speaker 3: by going back and forth. I appreciate all the comments

376
00:17:08,359 --> 00:17:11,399
Speaker 3: from the friendly Americans. However, this topic is fifty to

377
00:17:11,440 --> 00:17:14,719
Speaker 3: fifty of question of principle and the normality of driving

378
00:17:14,760 --> 00:17:18,080
Speaker 3: long distances in our country. And here's point number four.

379
00:17:18,160 --> 00:17:20,679
Speaker 3: As for not going to his birthday party, we for

380
00:17:20,800 --> 00:17:24,520
Speaker 3: sure will not as life happens. To preface. Last year,

381
00:17:24,560 --> 00:17:27,639
Speaker 3: we booked a vacation to Spain for February with Joseph

382
00:17:27,760 --> 00:17:31,040
Speaker 3: and Anita and another couple. Flight and apartments are paid

383
00:17:31,080 --> 00:17:33,800
Speaker 3: for already, but at the New Year's party, my girlfriend

384
00:17:33,840 --> 00:17:37,520
Speaker 3: had an ACL tear and has now scheduled an operation

385
00:17:37,640 --> 00:17:39,800
Speaker 3: for the end of February. I know it sounds weird

386
00:17:39,840 --> 00:17:41,840
Speaker 3: going on a trip right before the operation, but the

387
00:17:41,880 --> 00:17:44,439
Speaker 3: other option is to lose all of the spent money,

388
00:17:44,480 --> 00:17:46,560
Speaker 3: as I would not go as well to support her

389
00:17:46,880 --> 00:17:49,320
Speaker 3: if she chose not to go. The operation itself costs

390
00:17:49,320 --> 00:17:52,040
Speaker 3: two months wages, and it takes a toll on our

391
00:17:52,080 --> 00:17:55,960
Speaker 3: mental health to figure out our financial situation. Additionally, girlfriend's

392
00:17:55,960 --> 00:17:58,280
Speaker 3: grandma was brought to the hospital and has been in

393
00:17:58,280 --> 00:18:01,040
Speaker 3: intensive care for more than a week. It hasn't been easy.

394
00:18:01,119 --> 00:18:03,440
Speaker 3: Sorry for rambling, but I feel like this is all

395
00:18:03,480 --> 00:18:06,119
Speaker 3: relevant as the drama with John's wedding is making us

396
00:18:06,160 --> 00:18:09,560
Speaker 3: even less empathetic towards him. Now. To sum up, tomorrow,

397
00:18:09,720 --> 00:18:12,360
Speaker 3: I think he's going to give us not only the invitations,

398
00:18:12,440 --> 00:18:15,639
Speaker 3: but also to have a serious conversation, reminding you he

399
00:18:15,720 --> 00:18:18,879
Speaker 3: still hasn't actually talked to us. This is all just assumptions.

400
00:18:18,920 --> 00:18:22,920
Speaker 3: I would be starting with the least offensive or serious issues,

401
00:18:22,960 --> 00:18:25,760
Speaker 3: going up step by step if necessary, That is, if

402
00:18:25,760 --> 00:18:27,359
Speaker 3: he doesn't take the hint as I don't want to

403
00:18:27,400 --> 00:18:30,360
Speaker 3: burn down all of the bridges. First would be his

404
00:18:30,400 --> 00:18:32,760
Speaker 3: car with the adition I'm not familiar with, like the

405
00:18:32,840 --> 00:18:35,320
Speaker 3: learning curve and the sense of responsibility for his property,

406
00:18:35,560 --> 00:18:37,879
Speaker 3: the distance, no offense, but I feel like we are

407
00:18:37,920 --> 00:18:41,080
Speaker 3: not that close anymore. Wish us luck? Yeah, I mean, honestly,

408
00:18:41,320 --> 00:18:44,359
Speaker 3: I think you can just be like no, yeah, it

409
00:18:44,400 --> 00:18:46,200
Speaker 3: doesn't even have to be like a fair x Y

410
00:18:46,240 --> 00:18:48,439
Speaker 3: and be like no, I don't wanna know is a

411
00:18:48,440 --> 00:18:51,840
Speaker 3: complete sentence. Your cousins are gonna have to figure out

412
00:18:51,880 --> 00:18:55,920
Speaker 3: another way to get to your wedding. Yeah, or maybe

413
00:18:56,200 --> 00:18:59,600
Speaker 3: plant a little bit longer hold on. Maybe we could

414
00:18:59,600 --> 00:19:03,000
Speaker 3: push the wedding back a little bit so we can

415
00:19:03,160 --> 00:19:05,199
Speaker 3: have it planned out properly.

416
00:19:05,640 --> 00:19:08,000
Speaker 2: But but but what if I want to have a

417
00:19:08,040 --> 00:19:10,399
Speaker 2: wedding but no time to start it? What if I

418
00:19:10,400 --> 00:19:14,600
Speaker 2: want to have a wedding but no invitation sent What

419
00:19:14,640 --> 00:19:15,159
Speaker 2: if I want that?

420
00:19:15,240 --> 00:19:17,520
Speaker 3: Then you just do exactly what you're doing, like you

421
00:19:17,560 --> 00:19:19,719
Speaker 3: stay exactly on the course of the year at and

422
00:19:19,760 --> 00:19:21,800
Speaker 3: then you let me know how it goes later because

423
00:19:22,080 --> 00:19:24,120
Speaker 3: I'm not going to be there. But that is the end.

424
00:19:24,119 --> 00:19:27,600
Speaker 1: Of that story, my friend turned on me over a

425
00:19:27,680 --> 00:19:29,600
Speaker 1: rumor despite knowing the truth.

426
00:19:29,840 --> 00:19:32,800
Speaker 3: Maybe they just couldn't handle the truth. So this is

427
00:19:32,880 --> 00:19:34,840
Speaker 3: long and I'm sorry, but a bit of backstory.

428
00:19:34,960 --> 00:19:37,360
Speaker 2: So I, thirty two female, have had this best friend

429
00:19:37,440 --> 00:19:40,480
Speaker 2: thirty two female I'll call her Stacy since my freshman year,

430
00:19:40,680 --> 00:19:43,400
Speaker 2: year nine of high school, so eighteen years of friendship.

431
00:19:43,440 --> 00:19:43,600
Speaker 4: Now.

432
00:19:43,600 --> 00:19:46,400
Speaker 2: We met at school and quickly became inseparable. By the way,

433
00:19:46,400 --> 00:19:48,960
Speaker 2: this comes from cam one nine and seven thirty five

434
00:19:49,000 --> 00:19:50,800
Speaker 2: on the r slage. Okay story times I burnt it

435
00:19:50,800 --> 00:19:53,160
Speaker 2: to Over the years, we have remained best friends even

436
00:19:53,160 --> 00:19:55,439
Speaker 2: when life took us in different directions and life paths,

437
00:19:55,760 --> 00:19:58,679
Speaker 2: such as me being single, traveling, just focusing on myself

438
00:19:58,680 --> 00:20:01,159
Speaker 2: and her becoming a wife and and focusing on that,

439
00:20:01,200 --> 00:20:04,320
Speaker 2: we remained absolute best friends. She had met her soon

440
00:20:04,359 --> 00:20:06,960
Speaker 2: to be husband, thirty two male I'll call him Matt,

441
00:20:07,119 --> 00:20:10,200
Speaker 2: in high school. They broke up many times over the years,

442
00:20:10,320 --> 00:20:12,840
Speaker 2: dated other people, but always wound.

443
00:20:12,560 --> 00:20:13,640
Speaker 3: Up back together.

444
00:20:13,840 --> 00:20:16,920
Speaker 2: Eventually, they got married after she became pregnant with their

445
00:20:16,920 --> 00:20:19,840
Speaker 2: oldest around a summer of twenty fifteen, and they were

446
00:20:19,840 --> 00:20:21,760
Speaker 2: doing great. Then they split in like twenty seventeen and

447
00:20:21,800 --> 00:20:24,600
Speaker 2: she filed for divorce, but they never officially finished it,

448
00:20:24,680 --> 00:20:27,280
Speaker 2: so it was closed and they got back together maybe

449
00:20:27,359 --> 00:20:30,680
Speaker 2: a month or two later. Eventually they had two more children. Eventually,

450
00:20:30,720 --> 00:20:33,280
Speaker 2: a couple of years ago, she randomly texted me asking

451
00:20:33,320 --> 00:20:34,800
Speaker 2: if I was interested.

452
00:20:34,400 --> 00:20:36,560
Speaker 3: In a new job working from home.

453
00:20:36,760 --> 00:20:39,960
Speaker 2: Coincidentally, I had just found out the day before then

454
00:20:40,080 --> 00:20:42,479
Speaker 2: that I needed knee surgery, and given that I at

455
00:20:42,520 --> 00:20:45,639
Speaker 2: the time was a retail store manager, I was panicking

456
00:20:45,680 --> 00:20:48,040
Speaker 2: about how I would work while recovering from surgery. I

457
00:20:48,080 --> 00:20:50,359
Speaker 2: decided to take the leap and say yes to the

458
00:20:50,440 --> 00:20:53,080
Speaker 2: job offer from my best friend to work for her

459
00:20:53,119 --> 00:20:55,520
Speaker 2: and her then husband's company in the construction industry. I've

460
00:20:55,560 --> 00:20:57,879
Speaker 2: been with him then husband for two years and have

461
00:20:58,000 --> 00:21:00,600
Speaker 2: absolutely loved every moment working from him. That is, I

462
00:21:00,640 --> 00:21:04,159
Speaker 2: sincerely love my job. He's a fantastic boss, and he

463
00:21:04,200 --> 00:21:06,280
Speaker 2: has helped me with things that he didn't need to

464
00:21:06,680 --> 00:21:08,560
Speaker 2: just to show how he appreciates me.

465
00:21:08,680 --> 00:21:09,000
Speaker 3: I e.

466
00:21:09,200 --> 00:21:11,119
Speaker 2: He sent me seven hundred bucks at one point to

467
00:21:11,119 --> 00:21:13,879
Speaker 2: help me settle a medical debt with my psychiatrist because

468
00:21:13,920 --> 00:21:16,680
Speaker 2: my health insurance had lapsed because I was misled by

469
00:21:16,680 --> 00:21:18,800
Speaker 2: my insurance agent. And he told me just don't worry

470
00:21:18,800 --> 00:21:21,399
Speaker 2: about paying it back. He also gave me a raise

471
00:21:21,560 --> 00:21:24,320
Speaker 2: of ten K on my one year anniversary, and I

472
00:21:24,480 --> 00:21:27,760
Speaker 2: cried and thanked him because that would cover the increase

473
00:21:27,840 --> 00:21:30,119
Speaker 2: in my health insurance. And then he texted me that

474
00:21:30,200 --> 00:21:32,919
Speaker 2: he raised me another five K so I could enjoy

475
00:21:32,960 --> 00:21:34,960
Speaker 2: the raise and not have it all go to my

476
00:21:35,000 --> 00:21:37,360
Speaker 2: health insurance. And he brought me a brand new i've

477
00:21:37,359 --> 00:21:39,439
Speaker 2: had in my favorite color, just because he knew I

478
00:21:39,440 --> 00:21:41,639
Speaker 2: had wanted one. He even helped me get a second

479
00:21:41,760 --> 00:21:44,080
Speaker 2: job with another company he works for. I get to

480
00:21:44,119 --> 00:21:47,200
Speaker 2: do both jobs simultaneously, both bosses know about the other,

481
00:21:47,320 --> 00:21:50,200
Speaker 2: obviously in a forty to forty five hour work week

482
00:21:50,280 --> 00:21:52,840
Speaker 2: working from home, and I love both jobs, both what

483
00:21:52,960 --> 00:21:56,160
Speaker 2: I do and who I work with. I feel extremely fortunate,

484
00:21:56,240 --> 00:21:59,240
Speaker 2: especially considering I now make more than double what I

485
00:21:59,320 --> 00:22:03,000
Speaker 2: made at my very physically and mentally demanding job as

486
00:22:03,040 --> 00:22:06,280
Speaker 2: a retail manager after being there twice as long as

487
00:22:06,320 --> 00:22:08,520
Speaker 2: I've been with my current companies. I obviously have a

488
00:22:08,560 --> 00:22:11,640
Speaker 2: relationship with her soon to be ex husband as not

489
00:22:11,680 --> 00:22:14,240
Speaker 2: only her spouse and my boss, but as a friend

490
00:22:14,280 --> 00:22:17,560
Speaker 2: who I've known since she met him. And most importantly,

491
00:22:17,800 --> 00:22:21,719
Speaker 2: I consider him a friend because they have children together.

492
00:22:21,920 --> 00:22:25,040
Speaker 2: Once my best friends have children with someone, I'll try

493
00:22:25,119 --> 00:22:27,920
Speaker 2: everything I can to be friends with both parties because

494
00:22:27,960 --> 00:22:30,160
Speaker 2: I grew up in a split house and understand how

495
00:22:30,160 --> 00:22:33,000
Speaker 2: harmful picking sides can be to the kids. So unless

496
00:22:33,000 --> 00:22:36,440
Speaker 2: one parent is absolutely awful or once they have kids together,

497
00:22:36,480 --> 00:22:38,439
Speaker 2: their kids are the most important thing to me, and

498
00:22:38,480 --> 00:22:41,960
Speaker 2: I will love each parent equally. Now onto the DRUMA.

499
00:22:42,400 --> 00:22:44,880
Speaker 2: Stacey texts me out of the blue one day here

500
00:22:44,920 --> 00:22:47,679
Speaker 2: a couple of weeks ago, going off on me about

501
00:22:47,680 --> 00:22:50,480
Speaker 2: how I went on a girls trip with Matt's new.

502
00:22:50,320 --> 00:22:53,600
Speaker 1: Girlfriend question Mark. I was completely lost as to what

503
00:22:53,640 --> 00:22:56,160
Speaker 1: she was talking about. She was cussing at me, calling

504
00:22:56,200 --> 00:22:59,120
Speaker 1: me names, saying I did not truly care about her

505
00:22:59,240 --> 00:23:01,960
Speaker 1: or her kids because I had chosen a friendship with

506
00:23:02,040 --> 00:23:05,159
Speaker 1: the new girlfriend over her Stacy. Up to this point,

507
00:23:05,400 --> 00:23:08,320
Speaker 1: Stacy has been very back and forth on wanting to

508
00:23:08,320 --> 00:23:10,720
Speaker 1: get back together with Matt. Basically, if she had a

509
00:23:10,760 --> 00:23:13,200
Speaker 1: new guy interested in her, or she was dating someone

510
00:23:13,320 --> 00:23:15,440
Speaker 1: they had been living separately for over a year. At

511
00:23:15,440 --> 00:23:19,040
Speaker 1: this point, she was all about the divorce if nobody

512
00:23:19,119 --> 00:23:21,359
Speaker 1: was giving her attention. At the moment, she was all

513
00:23:21,400 --> 00:23:24,359
Speaker 1: about saving the family and getting Matt back.

514
00:23:24,680 --> 00:23:29,960
Speaker 3: That's so exhausting. Save the family, pick a lane and

515
00:23:30,200 --> 00:23:31,160
Speaker 3: stay in it.

516
00:23:31,400 --> 00:23:34,160
Speaker 2: I texted her back, asking what are you talking about,

517
00:23:34,200 --> 00:23:36,400
Speaker 2: and she said that she had been told by a

518
00:23:36,520 --> 00:23:39,480
Speaker 2: trustworthy source that I had gone on a girl's trip

519
00:23:39,520 --> 00:23:43,000
Speaker 2: with MAT's new boyfriend. She was not backing down on

520
00:23:43,080 --> 00:23:46,840
Speaker 2: me being a terrible person and friend, despite me absolutely

521
00:23:46,920 --> 00:23:51,040
Speaker 2: denying those rumors, because it isn't true. I had texted

522
00:23:51,040 --> 00:23:54,080
Speaker 2: with his new girlfriend a bit only to organize a

523
00:23:54,119 --> 00:23:57,879
Speaker 2: surprise birthday dinner for Matt, but that was still a

524
00:23:57,920 --> 00:24:00,520
Speaker 2: few days away. I had never even met this girl

525
00:24:00,560 --> 00:24:03,239
Speaker 2: in person. Eventually, I just said, okay, fine, if this

526
00:24:03,320 --> 00:24:06,080
Speaker 2: is how you want to end a eighteen year friendship,

527
00:24:06,200 --> 00:24:09,800
Speaker 2: so be it. It shows how much you value our friendship.

528
00:24:09,880 --> 00:24:12,480
Speaker 2: Fast forward, like three weeks we haven't spoken. She texts

529
00:24:12,520 --> 00:24:15,679
Speaker 2: me some upsetting news about her family. Because obviously I

530
00:24:15,720 --> 00:24:17,879
Speaker 2: love them after being around them for eighteen years. I

531
00:24:17,880 --> 00:24:20,119
Speaker 2: expressed my gratitude for her keeping me in the loop

532
00:24:20,160 --> 00:24:23,080
Speaker 2: and say they'll be on my mind. Basically, she apologizes

533
00:24:23,200 --> 00:24:25,359
Speaker 2: for everything. She says she shouldn't have flashed out, that

534
00:24:25,440 --> 00:24:27,280
Speaker 2: she's under a lot of stress with the divorce and

535
00:24:27,320 --> 00:24:30,240
Speaker 2: the kids and maintaining the house and fighting out life now,

536
00:24:30,320 --> 00:24:32,840
Speaker 2: et cetera, et cetera, How she misses me and regrets

537
00:24:32,920 --> 00:24:35,560
Speaker 2: lashing out. And I said that I understand how that

538
00:24:35,600 --> 00:24:38,959
Speaker 2: could be, but that isn't a great excuse for acting

539
00:24:39,000 --> 00:24:41,880
Speaker 2: that way. That I would have simply asked her if

540
00:24:41,880 --> 00:24:45,000
Speaker 2: it was true. But she tells me the person's name

541
00:24:45,160 --> 00:24:48,280
Speaker 2: who told me this room. It was a fellow employee.

542
00:24:48,320 --> 00:24:52,080
Speaker 2: I'll call her Beatrice, Oh, of the company I work for,

543
00:24:52,720 --> 00:24:53,879
Speaker 2: Matt's company, talk to me.

544
00:24:54,000 --> 00:24:56,199
Speaker 3: I was so stressed because I was waiting for it

545
00:24:56,240 --> 00:24:58,359
Speaker 3: to be like Matt was the one who did that.

546
00:24:58,520 --> 00:25:00,560
Speaker 3: I was waiting it for it to be like, yeah,

547
00:25:00,560 --> 00:25:03,800
Speaker 3: and me and Ope and my new girlfriend, like we

548
00:25:03,880 --> 00:25:05,600
Speaker 3: all went on a trip and it was great and

549
00:25:05,640 --> 00:25:07,680
Speaker 3: we all talked about how we don't like you, and

550
00:25:07,760 --> 00:25:09,520
Speaker 3: like I was waiting for that. I was like, and

551
00:25:09,600 --> 00:25:12,440
Speaker 3: now Matt is not the cool guy. But Matt, he's

552
00:25:12,440 --> 00:25:14,920
Speaker 3: still cool, still a cool guy. I told cool guy.

553
00:25:15,000 --> 00:25:18,160
Speaker 2: I'm I'm ninety percent like I feel like I feel

554
00:25:18,160 --> 00:25:20,040
Speaker 2: like Matt's gonna gonna gonna take the thing home.

555
00:25:20,080 --> 00:25:22,879
Speaker 3: Yeah, he's genuinely being genuine good boy. Yes, And now

556
00:25:22,920 --> 00:25:25,200
Speaker 3: we've got a whole b situation due or should I

557
00:25:25,240 --> 00:25:26,879
Speaker 3: say the Beatrice situation beeatrits.

558
00:25:27,160 --> 00:25:30,480
Speaker 2: Beatrice had recently started being super aggressive towards me for

559
00:25:30,880 --> 00:25:34,120
Speaker 2: no reason, to the point that two other employees approached

560
00:25:34,119 --> 00:25:37,320
Speaker 2: me about how her aggression towards everything I say was

561
00:25:37,359 --> 00:25:40,680
Speaker 2: making them feel uncomfortable on virtual company meetings. Matt had

562
00:25:40,680 --> 00:25:43,080
Speaker 2: offered to talk to her, but I said no because

563
00:25:43,119 --> 00:25:44,320
Speaker 2: I'm not confrontational.

564
00:25:44,480 --> 00:25:45,520
Speaker 3: I just ignore stuff.

565
00:25:45,600 --> 00:25:48,720
Speaker 2: I had basically become Matt's right hand by this time.

566
00:25:48,840 --> 00:25:51,640
Speaker 2: We felt very comfortable discussing business topics with each other.

567
00:25:51,760 --> 00:25:54,520
Speaker 2: He runs everything for his company by me. It's a

568
00:25:54,560 --> 00:25:56,919
Speaker 2: small company, but still comes to a lot of decisions,

569
00:25:56,960 --> 00:26:00,240
Speaker 2: and we discussed dang near everything before He made makes

570
00:26:00,280 --> 00:26:03,640
Speaker 2: the big decisions, so naturally he tells me lots of things,

571
00:26:03,800 --> 00:26:08,320
Speaker 2: and Beatrice had been warning him that I was embezzling

572
00:26:08,400 --> 00:26:12,400
Speaker 2: money and legitimately not doing any work. Now there's two

573
00:26:12,480 --> 00:26:14,800
Speaker 2: problems with this I can think of many. One, I

574
00:26:14,880 --> 00:26:17,960
Speaker 2: didn't even have access to her company's finances. I knew

575
00:26:18,040 --> 00:26:20,480
Speaker 2: numbers because Matt tells me pretty much everything, but I

576
00:26:20,520 --> 00:26:23,040
Speaker 2: didn't have direct access to the money, so how would

577
00:26:23,080 --> 00:26:26,119
Speaker 2: I have embezzled? And Two, as I mentioned before, I

578
00:26:26,200 --> 00:26:29,480
Speaker 2: have two jobs, one working for Matt and one working

579
00:26:29,480 --> 00:26:32,280
Speaker 2: for him. In both jobs, he's my boss, so he

580
00:26:32,400 --> 00:26:35,120
Speaker 2: knows what I'm doing, when and why I text him

581
00:26:35,240 --> 00:26:37,440
Speaker 2: any time I'm not at my desk between the hours

582
00:26:37,440 --> 00:26:39,639
Speaker 2: of nynam to five pm. He doesn't even care what

583
00:26:39,720 --> 00:26:41,920
Speaker 2: hours I work as long as the work gets done loll.

584
00:26:41,960 --> 00:26:44,439
Speaker 2: He asked me to please stop texting him by every

585
00:26:44,520 --> 00:26:46,639
Speaker 2: move because it makes him feel like he doesn't trust me.

586
00:26:46,760 --> 00:26:49,200
Speaker 2: So I am working, just none of what Beatrice wants

587
00:26:49,240 --> 00:26:51,600
Speaker 2: me to be working on. So Beatrice is known to

588
00:26:51,640 --> 00:26:55,240
Speaker 2: be a liah and Stacy knows this, but she chose

589
00:26:55,320 --> 00:26:57,800
Speaker 2: to lash out at me anyways. I tell Stacy that

590
00:26:57,840 --> 00:27:00,280
Speaker 2: I accept her apology and I appreciate it, but I'm

591
00:27:00,359 --> 00:27:02,719
Speaker 2: not sure if things will ever go back to how

592
00:27:02,720 --> 00:27:05,159
Speaker 2: they used to be because it sincerely.

593
00:27:04,680 --> 00:27:07,480
Speaker 3: Hurt me that she thought that little of me that I.

594
00:27:07,400 --> 00:27:10,200
Speaker 2: Would hurt her like that, and since then things haven't

595
00:27:10,240 --> 00:27:12,199
Speaker 2: really been the same. I don't feel the urgency to

596
00:27:12,200 --> 00:27:14,480
Speaker 2: text her back like I used to, or find myself

597
00:27:14,560 --> 00:27:16,600
Speaker 2: missing hanging out with her. So am I the a

598
00:27:16,720 --> 00:27:19,720
Speaker 2: hole for limiting, slash changing this friendship dynamic?

599
00:27:19,840 --> 00:27:21,880
Speaker 3: After she laughed lashed out, we have.

600
00:27:21,840 --> 00:27:23,959
Speaker 2: An update, but just super quick checking in.

601
00:27:24,160 --> 00:27:27,159
Speaker 3: Is Sop the a hole? No, I mean it's I think,

602
00:27:27,240 --> 00:27:29,640
Speaker 3: if anything, it just kind of that when you take

603
00:27:29,680 --> 00:27:32,840
Speaker 3: a really passive stance, things just kind of happen around you.

604
00:27:32,960 --> 00:27:35,320
Speaker 3: And it seems like Op has chosen that kind of

605
00:27:35,400 --> 00:27:38,760
Speaker 3: passive yes approach of like instead of talking it out

606
00:27:38,960 --> 00:27:41,199
Speaker 3: or confronting the issue, just kind of kind of let it,

607
00:27:41,280 --> 00:27:43,440
Speaker 3: let it ride, and then like how I feel about

608
00:27:43,480 --> 00:27:45,600
Speaker 3: it is gonna affect me. And then yeah, it makes

609
00:27:45,640 --> 00:27:48,400
Speaker 3: sense that you're not texting them back that fast update.

610
00:27:48,640 --> 00:27:50,879
Speaker 2: Adding this in for some context. We've had issues in

611
00:27:50,920 --> 00:27:53,520
Speaker 2: the past. I've caught her in many lives about weird

612
00:27:53,520 --> 00:27:55,920
Speaker 2: stuff over the years, cross checking some stuff that she's

613
00:27:55,920 --> 00:27:59,280
Speaker 2: told me on some stuff by talking with people involved casually,

614
00:27:59,400 --> 00:28:02,800
Speaker 2: and a lot of times they acts like I'm crazy

615
00:28:02,840 --> 00:28:06,000
Speaker 2: because of what I'm saying. AKA, what Stacy has told

616
00:28:06,040 --> 00:28:09,760
Speaker 2: me is just way off from the truth. Between conversations

617
00:28:09,840 --> 00:28:12,359
Speaker 2: she's had with Matt to things happening with mutual friends,

618
00:28:12,480 --> 00:28:15,200
Speaker 2: I've been shown proof even of some stuff she says

619
00:28:15,400 --> 00:28:18,480
Speaker 2: happening not being true, but I've always just ignored it

620
00:28:18,520 --> 00:28:20,800
Speaker 2: because I love her and just figure that she likes

621
00:28:20,840 --> 00:28:21,440
Speaker 2: the attention.

622
00:28:21,720 --> 00:28:21,800
Speaker 6: Now.

623
00:28:21,840 --> 00:28:24,679
Speaker 2: I've heard her tell stories to people about situations I

624
00:28:24,800 --> 00:28:27,439
Speaker 2: was with her in and she embellishes a lot of

625
00:28:27,520 --> 00:28:29,920
Speaker 2: random things. Made up a whole story once about us

626
00:28:29,920 --> 00:28:32,679
Speaker 2: being pulled over that never happened, but she did it

627
00:28:32,720 --> 00:28:35,880
Speaker 2: because she was late to something and made that as

628
00:28:35,880 --> 00:28:38,280
Speaker 2: an excuse. I guess, But as far as Beatrice goes,

629
00:28:38,320 --> 00:28:40,920
Speaker 2: I completely agree about her being toxic. She was let

630
00:28:41,000 --> 00:28:43,640
Speaker 2: go a week after Stacey blew up on me. Firing

631
00:28:43,720 --> 00:28:46,000
Speaker 2: was unrelated to the Stacy situation. She was let go

632
00:28:46,080 --> 00:28:48,400
Speaker 2: for many reasons relating to work, even outside of her

633
00:28:48,400 --> 00:28:49,240
Speaker 2: attitude towards me.

634
00:28:49,440 --> 00:28:51,240
Speaker 3: Only reason it took a few weeks was.

635
00:28:51,240 --> 00:28:53,240
Speaker 2: Because Matt and I were making sure that we had

636
00:28:53,320 --> 00:28:56,680
Speaker 2: proof of everything. The two employees who expressed discomfort at

637
00:28:56,680 --> 00:28:59,040
Speaker 2: how she was speaking to me. But please don't think

638
00:28:59,080 --> 00:29:01,880
Speaker 2: we don't value their feelings in being uncomfortable the two

639
00:29:01,880 --> 00:29:05,040
Speaker 2: employees we did. We actually stopped virtual meetings altogether for

640
00:29:05,080 --> 00:29:07,520
Speaker 2: a while to avoid having them play in a situation

641
00:29:07,640 --> 00:29:10,000
Speaker 2: while Beatrice was still with us. The only reason I

642
00:29:10,040 --> 00:29:12,560
Speaker 2: told Matt not to confront her when he asked me

643
00:29:12,640 --> 00:29:15,080
Speaker 2: the other two employees not express concerns yet, or I

644
00:29:15,080 --> 00:29:17,320
Speaker 2: would have chosen to address. It was because I thought

645
00:29:17,320 --> 00:29:20,320
Speaker 2: maybe I was just overreacting or being too sensitive, like

646
00:29:20,520 --> 00:29:23,040
Speaker 2: maybe she was just having a bad week or something.

647
00:29:22,760 --> 00:29:24,600
Speaker 3: And it would get better or something like that.

648
00:29:24,640 --> 00:29:28,280
Speaker 2: I saw some comments asking if Beatrice had access to finances.

649
00:29:28,320 --> 00:29:30,400
Speaker 2: The answer is no, no company card or access to

650
00:29:30,400 --> 00:29:32,520
Speaker 2: see the accounts. She didn't know what anyone was paid

651
00:29:32,560 --> 00:29:34,719
Speaker 2: or anything like that. I have no idea where this

652
00:29:34,880 --> 00:29:37,680
Speaker 2: embezzling thing comes from. I don't know how she figured

653
00:29:37,680 --> 00:29:40,160
Speaker 2: that one up. It was genuinely a mystery to Matt

654
00:29:40,160 --> 00:29:42,280
Speaker 2: and I both. And that's the end of the story.

655
00:29:42,360 --> 00:29:44,840
Speaker 2: Kind of a cliffhanger there. It's it's okay to have

656
00:29:44,880 --> 00:29:48,000
Speaker 2: a conversation, Like if we're giving op any note here

657
00:29:48,000 --> 00:29:49,560
Speaker 2: in the story, I think that it is like it

658
00:29:49,640 --> 00:29:52,040
Speaker 2: is okay to talk and communicate and express the things

659
00:29:52,080 --> 00:29:54,560
Speaker 2: that you maybe don't feel good about or you're.

660
00:29:54,440 --> 00:29:56,800
Speaker 3: Like trying to work through and all that jazz. Yeah,

661
00:29:56,840 --> 00:29:58,160
Speaker 3: have the confrontation.

662
00:29:59,320 --> 00:30:01,680
Speaker 2: Hey it's Johnny here. We're gonna get back to the stories.

663
00:30:01,680 --> 00:30:03,320
Speaker 2: But here's a quick three minute break of ass from

664
00:30:03,320 --> 00:30:03,920
Speaker 2: our sponsors.

665
00:30:04,480 --> 00:30:08,240
Speaker 1: My sister disrespected my kid free wedding rule.

666
00:30:08,240 --> 00:30:10,240
Speaker 3: So I had a removed that's a lot.

667
00:30:10,440 --> 00:30:13,920
Speaker 1: So I twenty eight female. I'm getting married next month

668
00:30:14,680 --> 00:30:16,560
Speaker 1: and I've been planning this wedding for almost a year.

669
00:30:16,800 --> 00:30:19,440
Speaker 1: My fiance, thirty one male, and I both agreed we

670
00:30:19,520 --> 00:30:23,800
Speaker 1: wanted an adult only event, mostly because we envisaged a

671
00:30:23,880 --> 00:30:26,840
Speaker 1: more formal wedding. Have you been to an adult's only wedding?

672
00:30:27,040 --> 00:30:28,080
Speaker 7: Yeah, it's lit.

673
00:30:28,640 --> 00:30:31,440
Speaker 1: Also, the venue is small and very upscale, not really

674
00:30:31,440 --> 00:30:33,520
Speaker 1: the best place for young kids to be around. By

675
00:30:33,520 --> 00:30:36,320
Speaker 1: the way, this comes from Stranger Danger four four for

676
00:30:36,400 --> 00:30:38,600
Speaker 1: four and if you want to submit your own stories,

677
00:30:38,600 --> 00:30:40,720
Speaker 1: good to our slash Okay storytime subburt it. So the

678
00:30:40,800 --> 00:30:44,600
Speaker 1: problem is my sister, thirty two female, who has two kids,

679
00:30:45,000 --> 00:30:47,720
Speaker 1: five and seven. When I first mentioned the no kids policy,

680
00:30:47,960 --> 00:30:50,200
Speaker 1: she didn't seem too upset, but as we got closer

681
00:30:50,240 --> 00:30:54,000
Speaker 1: to the wedding, she started dropping little hints about how

682
00:30:54,040 --> 00:30:56,360
Speaker 1: hard it would be to find a sitter. Totally get

683
00:30:56,360 --> 00:30:58,760
Speaker 1: that it's tough, but I did offer to pay for

684
00:30:58,840 --> 00:31:01,600
Speaker 1: a local sitter to stay with their kids at her

685
00:31:01,600 --> 00:31:03,760
Speaker 1: hotel for the night. That's a whim so she could

686
00:31:03,840 --> 00:31:07,280
Speaker 1: tend the wedding without worrying. Well, she didn't like that suggestion.

687
00:31:07,720 --> 00:31:11,840
Speaker 1: She says it's unfair because our other sister's wedding three

688
00:31:11,920 --> 00:31:14,959
Speaker 1: years ago was family friendly and allowed kids. But they

689
00:31:15,000 --> 00:31:18,120
Speaker 1: are different weddings. But at the time, our niece and

690
00:31:18,160 --> 00:31:22,520
Speaker 1: nephew were much younger and much quieter. At this age,

691
00:31:22,520 --> 00:31:24,920
Speaker 1: they're really energetic and love running around, and they tend

692
00:31:24,960 --> 00:31:27,160
Speaker 1: to get cranky at night, which isn't what I want

693
00:31:27,200 --> 00:31:30,320
Speaker 1: on my wedding day. It's become a point of contention.

694
00:31:30,760 --> 00:31:33,920
Speaker 1: She's now saying that if her kids aren't invited, she's

695
00:31:34,000 --> 00:31:36,440
Speaker 1: not sure she'll attend, which honestly hurts your bit. Do

696
00:31:36,480 --> 00:31:37,360
Speaker 1: you think that's too much?

697
00:31:37,520 --> 00:31:40,520
Speaker 7: I think so. I mean it's like your sister's wedding, she's.

698
00:31:40,320 --> 00:31:42,880
Speaker 1: On sureci'll attend, which honestly hurts a bit. My mom

699
00:31:42,920 --> 00:31:45,760
Speaker 1: have told me it's our choice, our wedding, our rules,

700
00:31:45,840 --> 00:31:48,080
Speaker 1: since we are the ones getting married, and I feel

701
00:31:48,080 --> 00:31:50,200
Speaker 1: like I've been flexible and offered a good solution. But

702
00:31:50,240 --> 00:31:53,800
Speaker 1: she's making me feel guilty for not bending this rule

703
00:31:53,840 --> 00:31:56,760
Speaker 1: for family. So am I the a hole for sticking

704
00:31:56,880 --> 00:31:59,640
Speaker 1: to the no kid's rule and potentially making my sister

705
00:31:59,680 --> 00:32:00,640
Speaker 1: feel well unwelcome.

706
00:32:00,680 --> 00:32:01,360
Speaker 3: But we got an edit.

707
00:32:01,440 --> 00:32:03,440
Speaker 1: So a lot of people have asked if I know

708
00:32:03,600 --> 00:32:06,000
Speaker 1: the sitter and I do okay. She lives in her

709
00:32:06,000 --> 00:32:09,720
Speaker 1: neighborhood and has a lot of our kids, neighbors or

710
00:32:09,800 --> 00:32:12,640
Speaker 1: our neighbors kids. She is a very responsible young woman,

711
00:32:12,640 --> 00:32:16,000
Speaker 1: around twenty two to twenty four, can't remember her exact age.

712
00:32:16,160 --> 00:32:19,080
Speaker 1: I do, of course, understand that my sister might not

713
00:32:19,120 --> 00:32:21,440
Speaker 1: be comfortable leaving the kids to a person she doesn't know,

714
00:32:21,640 --> 00:32:23,840
Speaker 1: but I just wanted to offer her a solution. Her

715
00:32:23,960 --> 00:32:26,400
Speaker 1: husband also has a family who I don't think would

716
00:32:26,400 --> 00:32:29,280
Speaker 1: have anything against sitting the kids for one night. But

717
00:32:29,320 --> 00:32:31,360
Speaker 1: I will let her decide if she wants to show them.

718
00:32:31,600 --> 00:32:34,400
Speaker 1: I just hope she does, since I do care about

719
00:32:34,440 --> 00:32:37,280
Speaker 1: her and would love to have her there. Another reason

720
00:32:37,800 --> 00:32:40,640
Speaker 1: is we don't want kids there because there's open bar

721
00:32:40,760 --> 00:32:43,640
Speaker 1: and we don't want kids and wasted people around each other.

722
00:32:43,840 --> 00:32:46,680
Speaker 1: And my fiance's family loves the party with a nice

723
00:32:46,720 --> 00:32:48,560
Speaker 1: amount of wine and beer, Like, why would you even

724
00:32:48,560 --> 00:32:51,000
Speaker 1: want your kids there? Thank you for all the nice

725
00:32:51,000 --> 00:32:53,320
Speaker 1: words and advice. I will give an update after the

726
00:32:53,360 --> 00:32:55,720
Speaker 1: wedding and we will be keeping the no kids rule,

727
00:32:55,800 --> 00:32:58,520
Speaker 1: but we are thinking about letting kids be there for

728
00:32:58,600 --> 00:33:03,000
Speaker 1: the ceremony like some people suggested. Sorry has taken so

729
00:33:03,160 --> 00:33:05,400
Speaker 1: long to write the update. To be honest, I totally

730
00:33:05,400 --> 00:33:08,320
Speaker 1: forgot about my post between the wedding, the honeymoon, and

731
00:33:08,360 --> 00:33:10,880
Speaker 1: the family drama. It just slipped my mind. But better

732
00:33:11,000 --> 00:33:11,840
Speaker 1: late than never.

733
00:33:11,960 --> 00:33:12,120
Speaker 3: Right.

734
00:33:12,320 --> 00:33:15,640
Speaker 1: Well, the wedding happened, and let's just say it wasn't

735
00:33:15,680 --> 00:33:19,280
Speaker 1: without its moments. Buckle up because this is a ride.

736
00:33:19,400 --> 00:33:22,040
Speaker 1: So after the last post, me and my now husband

737
00:33:22,080 --> 00:33:25,520
Speaker 1: decided to allow kids at the ceremony, but kept the

738
00:33:25,560 --> 00:33:29,240
Speaker 1: reception adults only. My sister wasn't thrilled, but said she

739
00:33:29,240 --> 00:33:31,040
Speaker 1: would figure something out. I took that to mean she

740
00:33:31,120 --> 00:33:33,760
Speaker 1: was actually going to find someone to take the kids

741
00:33:33,760 --> 00:33:36,400
Speaker 1: after the ceremony. No, it wasn't that ha cute of

742
00:33:36,480 --> 00:33:38,560
Speaker 1: me to assume. And it's not like I don't like

743
00:33:38,640 --> 00:33:40,640
Speaker 1: my nephew and niece. They're adorable and sweet when we

744
00:33:40,760 --> 00:33:43,920
Speaker 1: babysit them because they know we set rules. But when

745
00:33:43,960 --> 00:33:47,800
Speaker 1: my sister is there, they don't listen to anything because

746
00:33:47,840 --> 00:33:50,920
Speaker 1: she and her husband let them do whatever they want. Okay,

747
00:33:50,960 --> 00:33:52,240
Speaker 1: So I feel like these kids are going to be

748
00:33:52,320 --> 00:33:54,040
Speaker 1: let loose on this wedding. I think it's not gonna

749
00:33:54,040 --> 00:33:57,080
Speaker 1: go well, little children. The ceremony was beautiful, My niece

750
00:33:57,120 --> 00:33:59,760
Speaker 1: and nephew had their iPads, so they were still and

751
00:34:00,040 --> 00:34:03,440
Speaker 1: well behaved for a moment, For a beautiful moment, I

752
00:34:03,480 --> 00:34:07,520
Speaker 1: thought everything would go smoothly. How naive I was. After

753
00:34:07,520 --> 00:34:11,120
Speaker 1: the ceremony, me and my newlywed husband stayed to take

754
00:34:11,160 --> 00:34:13,920
Speaker 1: some more photos, and then we moved to the reception.

755
00:34:14,520 --> 00:34:17,400
Speaker 1: Guests were already mingling, drinks were being poured, and I

756
00:34:17,520 --> 00:34:20,040
Speaker 1: was feeling great, and out of the corner of my

757
00:34:20,160 --> 00:34:23,840
Speaker 1: eye I saw my sister, her husband, and the kids.

758
00:34:24,160 --> 00:34:26,839
Speaker 1: The one thing I told you not to bring, you'll

759
00:34:26,840 --> 00:34:29,719
Speaker 1: bring these little rugrats in. Come on, How hard is

760
00:34:29,760 --> 00:34:31,839
Speaker 1: it to leave your kids somewhere? People do it all

761
00:34:31,880 --> 00:34:34,600
Speaker 1: the time. I thought she was just waiting for someone

762
00:34:34,640 --> 00:34:36,960
Speaker 1: to come pick them up, and didn't think much of it.

763
00:34:37,120 --> 00:34:41,840
Speaker 1: Then about twenty minutes later, my nephew bolted across the

764
00:34:41,960 --> 00:34:46,040
Speaker 1: room and in between the tables, nearly colliding with my stepfather.

765
00:34:46,280 --> 00:34:48,360
Speaker 1: I looked at my maid of honor and we both

766
00:34:48,440 --> 00:34:51,160
Speaker 1: walked over to my sister. Keeping my voice low, I

767
00:34:51,239 --> 00:34:54,640
Speaker 1: reminded her that the reception was adults only. I feel

768
00:34:54,680 --> 00:34:56,560
Speaker 1: like she's doing this and her like, I just want

769
00:34:56,560 --> 00:34:57,319
Speaker 1: to remind you.

770
00:34:57,600 --> 00:34:59,160
Speaker 7: As the kids are like running around.

771
00:34:59,400 --> 00:35:00,880
Speaker 3: Yeah, causing a ruckus.

772
00:35:01,000 --> 00:35:05,240
Speaker 1: She sighed dramatically like I was personally ruining her life,

773
00:35:05,239 --> 00:35:07,960
Speaker 1: and said, we couldn't find a sitter last minute, so

774
00:35:08,560 --> 00:35:10,880
Speaker 1: we'll just keep them for a little while.

775
00:35:11,160 --> 00:35:13,320
Speaker 7: Last minute, y'all had time to prepare.

776
00:35:13,640 --> 00:35:16,840
Speaker 1: I calmly told her that I had given her multiple options,

777
00:35:16,840 --> 00:35:21,640
Speaker 1: including a fully vetted, well recommended sitter and her own

778
00:35:21,680 --> 00:35:25,160
Speaker 1: in laws, but she thanked no to the sitter and

779
00:35:25,239 --> 00:35:28,160
Speaker 1: apparently didn't ask her in laws. So she refused the

780
00:35:28,200 --> 00:35:30,200
Speaker 1: sitter and didn't ask the in law, So this is

781
00:35:30,280 --> 00:35:34,720
Speaker 1: weaponized in competence. Well, she just shrugged and said, well,

782
00:35:34,840 --> 00:35:37,719
Speaker 1: we're already here and they're behaving just fine. At that

783
00:35:37,880 --> 00:35:42,600
Speaker 1: exact moment, glass shattered, My heart dropped. The entire room

784
00:35:43,000 --> 00:35:45,839
Speaker 1: passed away silent. I looked around trying to figure out

785
00:35:45,880 --> 00:35:48,080
Speaker 1: what happened, and saw my aunt, God bless her, I

786
00:35:48,120 --> 00:35:51,200
Speaker 1: love her so much, lifting my nephew and handing him

787
00:35:51,200 --> 00:35:53,800
Speaker 1: over to my stepdad. He was fortunately okay because he

788
00:35:53,800 --> 00:35:56,279
Speaker 1: didn't step in glass. Because my lovely aunt were close

789
00:35:56,360 --> 00:35:59,400
Speaker 1: enough to control the situation, My dad and husband cleaned

790
00:35:59,440 --> 00:36:03,840
Speaker 1: all the glasses up. Apparently my nephew had been crawling

791
00:36:03,920 --> 00:36:07,440
Speaker 1: under the tables, which is why. Maybe a sister was like, oh, yeah,

792
00:36:07,480 --> 00:36:09,399
Speaker 1: they're not causing any troublecause you couldn't see them. They

793
00:36:09,400 --> 00:36:12,480
Speaker 1: were doing a covert operation to flip over the tables

794
00:36:12,560 --> 00:36:14,520
Speaker 1: and mess up the wedding. You must have pulled a

795
00:36:14,560 --> 00:36:17,640
Speaker 1: cloth by accident, making a plate and a few glasses

796
00:36:17,680 --> 00:36:21,800
Speaker 1: fall and shatter. Thankfully, nobody got hurt and the glass

797
00:36:21,840 --> 00:36:24,400
Speaker 1: got cleaned up. My maid of honor helped find some

798
00:36:24,440 --> 00:36:27,080
Speaker 1: new glasses and a plates, and when the chaos was

799
00:36:27,120 --> 00:36:29,719
Speaker 1: taken care of, I went back to my sister and

800
00:36:29,800 --> 00:36:35,000
Speaker 1: told her she needed to get the kids home now. Yeah, leave, leave,

801
00:36:35,440 --> 00:36:40,960
Speaker 1: get out of here, and she lost her mind again,

802
00:36:41,000 --> 00:36:44,600
Speaker 1: this is at op's a wedding. My sister started yelling.

803
00:36:44,840 --> 00:36:47,799
Speaker 1: She said stuff like, I can't believe you're choosing a

804
00:36:47,880 --> 00:36:52,520
Speaker 1: stupid rule over your own family. You're being a total bridezilla,

805
00:36:52,800 --> 00:36:55,720
Speaker 1: and you're literally punting out your own niece and nephew

806
00:36:55,840 --> 00:36:59,560
Speaker 1: like their stray dogs. Heck, yeah, you deserve to be

807
00:36:59,560 --> 00:37:02,880
Speaker 1: punted out. At this point, people were staring. My husband

808
00:37:02,960 --> 00:37:05,960
Speaker 1: came over to back me up, and my sister's husband

809
00:37:06,000 --> 00:37:08,480
Speaker 1: came to calm her down. She said she couldn't drive

810
00:37:08,520 --> 00:37:10,880
Speaker 1: them home since she already had something to drink. My

811
00:37:10,960 --> 00:37:13,600
Speaker 1: brother in law, her husband said he would drive them

812
00:37:13,600 --> 00:37:17,760
Speaker 1: to his parents' place. Why was it that option used

813
00:37:17,880 --> 00:37:21,160
Speaker 1: from the beginning? They literally had that option the whole time.

814
00:37:21,360 --> 00:37:23,200
Speaker 3: I'm a little mad the audacity.

815
00:37:23,480 --> 00:37:26,320
Speaker 1: She got even more mad and said that she couldn't

816
00:37:26,400 --> 00:37:28,480
Speaker 1: leave her kids just to be at the wedding. My

817
00:37:28,600 --> 00:37:32,600
Speaker 1: mom then told her that she could leave to them,

818
00:37:32,920 --> 00:37:35,160
Speaker 1: and then my sister stormed out while muttering about how

819
00:37:35,200 --> 00:37:38,759
Speaker 1: I was selfish and heartless. My brother in law her

820
00:37:38,840 --> 00:37:43,040
Speaker 1: husband just stood there looking so embarrassed, before awkwardly getting

821
00:37:43,040 --> 00:37:46,359
Speaker 1: their kids, apologized to me and my husband, and then

822
00:37:46,520 --> 00:37:49,120
Speaker 1: following her outs. The rest of the night went really nice.

823
00:37:49,320 --> 00:37:52,040
Speaker 1: After the kids are gone, we had so much fun.

824
00:37:52,120 --> 00:37:54,120
Speaker 1: It was genuinely a good night. My husband and I

825
00:37:54,160 --> 00:37:57,160
Speaker 1: took a taxi to our hotel around three. The party

826
00:37:57,280 --> 00:37:59,719
Speaker 1: didn't end till around five or six, but we were

827
00:37:59,760 --> 00:38:02,640
Speaker 1: tired and just decided it was enough for us. We

828
00:38:02,760 --> 00:38:05,319
Speaker 1: fell asleep right away, and it was honestly the best

829
00:38:05,360 --> 00:38:07,080
Speaker 1: sleep ever. I thought the drama was over.

830
00:38:07,400 --> 00:38:09,120
Speaker 7: Oh God, I thought it was too.

831
00:38:09,480 --> 00:38:11,680
Speaker 1: I thought we were wrapping up. No, there's more drama.

832
00:38:11,800 --> 00:38:13,640
Speaker 1: These kids are gonna crawl back. They're gonna be like

833
00:38:13,680 --> 00:38:16,440
Speaker 1: little kid zombies. I thought the drama was over, but nah,

834
00:38:16,600 --> 00:38:19,560
Speaker 1: that would be too boring, right, Honestly, I wouldn't mind

835
00:38:19,560 --> 00:38:22,560
Speaker 1: some boring moments. The next morning, I say morning, but

836
00:38:22,600 --> 00:38:25,000
Speaker 1: it was after one pm. We were both pretty hungover

837
00:38:25,080 --> 00:38:27,400
Speaker 1: and decided to just order some pizza since we didn't

838
00:38:27,400 --> 00:38:29,000
Speaker 1: want to go down and eat with a whole lot

839
00:38:29,080 --> 00:38:31,480
Speaker 1: of people in a cafe in the hotel restaurant. I

840
00:38:31,560 --> 00:38:34,040
Speaker 1: checked my phone while he ordered pizza and saw my

841
00:38:34,160 --> 00:38:37,439
Speaker 1: mom had written me to not pay attention to the post.

842
00:38:37,560 --> 00:38:40,440
Speaker 1: She would take care of it. Our people just putting

843
00:38:40,440 --> 00:38:42,839
Speaker 1: their family drama on Facebook again, because I think that's

844
00:38:42,840 --> 00:38:43,400
Speaker 1: what's happening.

845
00:38:43,760 --> 00:38:47,320
Speaker 7: That's not surprising. Facebook is so weird.

846
00:38:47,880 --> 00:38:50,840
Speaker 1: I was so confused and didn't know what she was

847
00:38:50,880 --> 00:38:55,080
Speaker 1: talking about. But then I saw my sister's post on Facebook.

848
00:38:55,480 --> 00:39:00,640
Speaker 1: My sister had posted a full on rant about how

849
00:39:00,640 --> 00:39:05,120
Speaker 1: I humiliated her in front of everyone and made her

850
00:39:05,239 --> 00:39:08,880
Speaker 1: choose between her kids and her family. She claimed I

851
00:39:08,960 --> 00:39:11,840
Speaker 1: was targeting her for having a fancy wedding and excluding

852
00:39:11,840 --> 00:39:15,040
Speaker 1: her kids, and she heavily implied that I had disinvited

853
00:39:15,040 --> 00:39:21,080
Speaker 1: her because I hated being an aunt and hated her kids.

854
00:39:20,520 --> 00:39:23,359
Speaker 1: What Some of our distant relatives who weren't even at

855
00:39:23,360 --> 00:39:26,560
Speaker 1: the wedding started calling me out. One of my cousins commented, Wow,

856
00:39:26,600 --> 00:39:29,520
Speaker 1: some people take weddings way too seriously. It's just one night.

857
00:39:29,760 --> 00:39:32,080
Speaker 1: What the heck, it's your wedding night. It's not just

858
00:39:32,120 --> 00:39:32,800
Speaker 1: any night.

859
00:39:32,719 --> 00:39:33,520
Speaker 7: It's your night.

860
00:39:33,880 --> 00:39:36,680
Speaker 1: And also, op, he gave so many weeks.

861
00:39:36,920 --> 00:39:37,520
Speaker 7: Also, it's like.

862
00:39:37,480 --> 00:39:40,080
Speaker 8: You're spending that much money on your party, Like you

863
00:39:40,120 --> 00:39:41,320
Speaker 8: can make your own rules.

864
00:39:41,719 --> 00:39:44,160
Speaker 1: We're having a little bull party right now. We're not

865
00:39:44,239 --> 00:39:45,239
Speaker 1: inviting kids.

866
00:39:45,120 --> 00:39:47,440
Speaker 7: And guess what the rules are. Be a cowgirl and

867
00:39:47,520 --> 00:39:49,960
Speaker 7: a cowboy, not a cow kid. And we listened to

868
00:39:50,000 --> 00:39:50,480
Speaker 7: the rules.

869
00:39:50,800 --> 00:39:54,560
Speaker 1: But luckily, my god sent mom and dad were not

870
00:39:55,280 --> 00:39:58,799
Speaker 1: having it. They had both jumped into the comments to

871
00:39:58,920 --> 00:40:01,920
Speaker 1: set the record straits, saying I'd given her plenty of

872
00:40:01,920 --> 00:40:05,839
Speaker 1: options and she was fully aware of the rule months

873
00:40:05,840 --> 00:40:06,600
Speaker 1: in advance.

874
00:40:06,920 --> 00:40:08,480
Speaker 7: Must we belabor the point?

875
00:40:08,680 --> 00:40:11,000
Speaker 1: If it was a point, it's just being like stabbed

876
00:40:11,000 --> 00:40:13,440
Speaker 1: into the ground and made very dull. I given her

877
00:40:13,480 --> 00:40:15,960
Speaker 1: plenty of options and she was fully aware of the

878
00:40:16,040 --> 00:40:18,400
Speaker 1: rule months in advance. I literally offered to pay for

879
00:40:18,440 --> 00:40:22,320
Speaker 1: a sitter and she refused to use it. I didn't

880
00:40:22,360 --> 00:40:24,400
Speaker 1: want to get into it and just turned off the phone.

881
00:40:24,840 --> 00:40:27,960
Speaker 1: A few days after the wedding, my brother in law,

882
00:40:28,200 --> 00:40:32,359
Speaker 1: my sister's husband, called me to apologize. He admitted that

883
00:40:32,440 --> 00:40:35,440
Speaker 1: he had begged my sister to either accept my offer

884
00:40:35,520 --> 00:40:37,720
Speaker 1: of a sitter or leave the kids with his parents,

885
00:40:37,960 --> 00:40:40,880
Speaker 1: but she refused because she thought I'd cave at the

886
00:40:40,960 --> 00:40:44,600
Speaker 1: last minute. So basically, the sister was planning this whole

887
00:40:44,640 --> 00:40:46,560
Speaker 1: thing and be like, no, I'm not going to get

888
00:40:46,560 --> 00:40:48,399
Speaker 1: a sitter because I want my kids there.

889
00:40:48,520 --> 00:40:50,560
Speaker 7: That's so silly. That's just rude.

890
00:40:50,840 --> 00:40:54,160
Speaker 1: I mean, it's super rude. He was mortified by how

891
00:40:54,200 --> 00:40:56,279
Speaker 1: she acted and told me he had no idea she

892
00:40:56,320 --> 00:40:58,319
Speaker 1: was going to make a scene like that. Apparently they

893
00:40:58,360 --> 00:41:01,239
Speaker 1: got into a huge fight about it afterwards because he

894
00:41:01,320 --> 00:41:03,879
Speaker 1: was embarrassed that she made a scene. I didn't really

895
00:41:03,880 --> 00:41:06,200
Speaker 1: say much. We had planned her honeymoon to be from

896
00:41:06,239 --> 00:41:08,920
Speaker 1: the third of January to the twelfth of January so

897
00:41:08,960 --> 00:41:11,840
Speaker 1: that we could hold Christmas and New Year's with our families,

898
00:41:12,120 --> 00:41:14,640
Speaker 1: and the temperature is better in January for a skiing track.

899
00:41:14,680 --> 00:41:16,640
Speaker 1: We held Christmas at my husband's parents and it was

900
00:41:16,680 --> 00:41:19,400
Speaker 1: really nice. We then spent New Years with some of

901
00:41:19,400 --> 00:41:21,719
Speaker 1: our friends. My sister did not speak to me at

902
00:41:21,760 --> 00:41:24,600
Speaker 1: all since the wedding. She did take down the post, though.

903
00:41:24,960 --> 00:41:27,560
Speaker 1: We went on our honeymoon and it was so much fun.

904
00:41:27,640 --> 00:41:30,680
Speaker 1: We both snowboard, though on total different skill levels, him

905
00:41:30,719 --> 00:41:33,760
Speaker 1: being just a teeny didy bit better. My sister called

906
00:41:33,760 --> 00:41:36,359
Speaker 1: to apologize during the trip, but it really just ended

907
00:41:36,400 --> 00:41:39,480
Speaker 1: up with her belittling me for punting her out of

908
00:41:39,520 --> 00:41:42,200
Speaker 1: the wedding. So that's funn I guess. Do I regret

909
00:41:42,280 --> 00:41:45,560
Speaker 1: punting her out? Absolutely not. My wedding was so much

910
00:41:45,600 --> 00:41:48,960
Speaker 1: better after she left. No drama, just perfect nights. Amen,

911
00:41:49,400 --> 00:41:51,760
Speaker 1: throw people out that deserve to be thrown out? Well,

912
00:41:52,080 --> 00:41:55,080
Speaker 1: no drama, just a perfect night with the people who

913
00:41:55,120 --> 00:41:58,040
Speaker 1: I love. There's another relevant updates, but I feel like

914
00:41:58,080 --> 00:42:00,640
Speaker 1: we've ever good ground. Hopefully no more drama.

915
00:42:00,680 --> 00:42:00,960
Speaker 3: Well.

916
00:42:01,120 --> 00:42:03,360
Speaker 1: Am I mad about the Facebook post? Not really? My

917
00:42:03,400 --> 00:42:05,480
Speaker 1: mom and dad dragged her so hard in the comments

918
00:42:05,560 --> 00:42:06,719
Speaker 1: that she eventually deleted it.

919
00:42:06,800 --> 00:42:07,080
Speaker 3: Good.

920
00:42:07,560 --> 00:42:10,000
Speaker 1: Am I still talking to my sister? Do you think

921
00:42:10,000 --> 00:42:11,400
Speaker 1: this deserves no contact?

922
00:42:11,760 --> 00:42:11,960
Speaker 3: No?

923
00:42:12,040 --> 00:42:15,680
Speaker 8: I feel like this shouldn't lead to that, Like, why

924
00:42:15,680 --> 00:42:17,800
Speaker 8: can't people just have good conflict resolution?

925
00:42:18,160 --> 00:42:20,200
Speaker 1: How would you resolute this conflict?

926
00:42:20,560 --> 00:42:22,239
Speaker 7: I mean literally just have a conversation.

927
00:42:22,400 --> 00:42:24,520
Speaker 8: Hey, this was my wedding, Like, it wasn't fair for

928
00:42:24,600 --> 00:42:27,759
Speaker 8: you to not listen to this request that I had

929
00:42:27,800 --> 00:42:30,839
Speaker 8: that I have like full rights to make and then

930
00:42:30,880 --> 00:42:33,000
Speaker 8: to like make a scene and make her seem.

931
00:42:32,760 --> 00:42:33,560
Speaker 7: Like a bad guy.

932
00:42:33,600 --> 00:42:36,920
Speaker 8: It's just disrespectful, Like you can just tell people.

933
00:42:36,680 --> 00:42:39,360
Speaker 1: That I would be way more reticent to invite sister

934
00:42:40,000 --> 00:42:42,440
Speaker 1: to a big event later if like this is the

935
00:42:42,480 --> 00:42:43,279
Speaker 1: kind of stuff she pulled.

936
00:42:43,520 --> 00:42:45,520
Speaker 7: I don't think this warrants no contact.

937
00:42:45,560 --> 00:42:48,440
Speaker 8: I think this warrants like a serious conversation with your

938
00:42:48,480 --> 00:42:49,400
Speaker 8: family member.

939
00:42:49,440 --> 00:42:52,440
Speaker 1: Serious conversation and then caution on the next events. She

940
00:42:52,480 --> 00:42:55,440
Speaker 1: has yet to actually apologize and still acts like I

941
00:42:55,760 --> 00:42:58,360
Speaker 1: was the unreasonable one at this point. I'm just letting

942
00:42:58,400 --> 00:43:00,879
Speaker 1: her stew in her own bad decisions. Oh yeah, hope

943
00:43:00,920 --> 00:43:03,120
Speaker 1: you enjoyed the read, even though the update is a

944
00:43:03,160 --> 00:43:06,640
Speaker 1: bit late. And that is where this story ends.

945
00:43:06,920 --> 00:43:11,319
Speaker 3: And I hired a house sitter from an app and

946
00:43:11,360 --> 00:43:13,160
Speaker 3: she ended up stealing from me.

947
00:43:13,400 --> 00:43:16,520
Speaker 7: Oh, why you can't trust someone on the internet. That's crazy.

948
00:43:16,800 --> 00:43:19,759
Speaker 3: Hired a sitter on Rover over a month ago for

949
00:43:19,840 --> 00:43:22,600
Speaker 3: a trip this week from last Saturday through Friday to

950
00:43:22,680 --> 00:43:25,320
Speaker 3: house sit at my house we did a meet and greet.

951
00:43:25,400 --> 00:43:28,000
Speaker 3: I liked her. She had eight five star reviews over

952
00:43:28,000 --> 00:43:29,920
Speaker 3: the last year and a half, with the last several

953
00:43:29,920 --> 00:43:33,920
Speaker 3: months of verified stays booked through Rover. We did exchange

954
00:43:33,960 --> 00:43:36,040
Speaker 3: WhatsApp numbers because I'm out of the country on this

955
00:43:36,120 --> 00:43:39,640
Speaker 3: trip and do not have an international calling plan. By

956
00:43:39,680 --> 00:43:43,319
Speaker 3: the way, this comes from user dragon master Ash and

957
00:43:43,360 --> 00:43:45,279
Speaker 3: if you want to submit your own stories, go to

958
00:43:45,280 --> 00:43:48,160
Speaker 3: the r slash Okay storytime subredit. She sent messages the

959
00:43:48,200 --> 00:43:51,000
Speaker 3: first few days. Wednesday, at three am, she sent a

960
00:43:51,000 --> 00:43:53,279
Speaker 3: message that she had been sick with the stomach bug

961
00:43:53,360 --> 00:43:55,560
Speaker 3: but was feeling better. She asked a question about one

962
00:43:55,600 --> 00:43:58,759
Speaker 3: dog's behavior, sitting in the bathroom and barking, and I responded,

963
00:43:58,840 --> 00:44:01,319
Speaker 3: she probably wants fresh woe he's asking to drink from

964
00:44:01,360 --> 00:44:03,560
Speaker 3: the toilet. I didn't hear anything, so I sent several

965
00:44:03,560 --> 00:44:06,560
Speaker 3: messages checking in on WhatsApp and Rover. No response. I

966
00:44:06,640 --> 00:44:08,440
Speaker 3: checked my smart lock on my door and there was

967
00:44:08,600 --> 00:44:11,759
Speaker 3: very minimal locking and unlocking, and always from the inside.

968
00:44:11,760 --> 00:44:14,880
Speaker 3: I checked my camera outside that door. My dogs happened

969
00:44:14,880 --> 00:44:17,319
Speaker 3: to be outside, so I watched them. Then I hear

970
00:44:17,400 --> 00:44:21,200
Speaker 3: a man, a man I don't know, say, okay, one

971
00:44:21,280 --> 00:44:23,799
Speaker 3: last shot. Then the man whistles for the dogs to

972
00:44:23,800 --> 00:44:27,719
Speaker 3: come inside, and she wobbles into the doorway. They walk out,

973
00:44:27,800 --> 00:44:30,239
Speaker 3: and she falls over and he catches her. They leave

974
00:44:30,320 --> 00:44:33,680
Speaker 3: together in I assume his vehicle. She was barefoot and

975
00:44:33,920 --> 00:44:37,840
Speaker 3: obviously heavily indoxicated. That was four PM on Thursday. I

976
00:44:37,880 --> 00:44:40,440
Speaker 3: sent my friend over around midnight check on the dogs

977
00:44:40,440 --> 00:44:43,120
Speaker 3: and let them out. She found my bottles of liqueur

978
00:44:43,280 --> 00:44:46,719
Speaker 3: all empty all over the dining table. They were all

979
00:44:46,760 --> 00:44:49,759
Speaker 3: either brand new or over half full. A handful of

980
00:44:49,880 --> 00:44:53,080
Speaker 3: Seltzers empty and in the trash, and a container of

981
00:44:53,440 --> 00:44:55,880
Speaker 3: corotum on the table and several more in the trash.

982
00:44:56,000 --> 00:44:59,200
Speaker 3: A couple empty bottles of a THHC drink with more

983
00:44:59,200 --> 00:45:01,640
Speaker 3: in the fridge that are not mine. A vape pen

984
00:45:01,719 --> 00:45:03,960
Speaker 3: on the table, loose pills in the bottom of her purse,

985
00:45:04,120 --> 00:45:07,799
Speaker 3: methyl carbonol five hundred milligram that matches the prescription my

986
00:45:07,880 --> 00:45:10,319
Speaker 3: dog has, but she had more than what my dog

987
00:45:10,400 --> 00:45:13,760
Speaker 3: was prescribed, so either none or only some were stolen

988
00:45:13,800 --> 00:45:16,560
Speaker 3: from my dog. My boxes where I keep medications were

989
00:45:16,600 --> 00:45:19,399
Speaker 3: taken down from the cabinet in the bathroom and set

990
00:45:19,440 --> 00:45:21,680
Speaker 3: on the counter and back of the toilet. I won't

991
00:45:21,680 --> 00:45:23,440
Speaker 3: know if any are missing until I get home, but

992
00:45:23,520 --> 00:45:26,080
Speaker 3: I have the things worth stealing with me, and the

993
00:45:26,120 --> 00:45:28,560
Speaker 3: toilets clawed. The second toilet has a towel under it,

994
00:45:28,640 --> 00:45:30,560
Speaker 3: like it was leaking, which it has never done before.

995
00:45:30,680 --> 00:45:33,880
Speaker 3: My dogs free feed. I keep food in their bowls

996
00:45:33,880 --> 00:45:36,759
Speaker 3: at all time. Both bowls were empty, their water, a

997
00:45:36,800 --> 00:45:39,680
Speaker 3: two gallon bowl with a fountain was empty. My friend

998
00:45:39,719 --> 00:45:41,319
Speaker 3: put two and a half cups of food in both

999
00:45:41,320 --> 00:45:43,480
Speaker 3: bowls and they immediately ate all of it. Then she

1000
00:45:43,520 --> 00:45:46,400
Speaker 3: put another five cups in both bowls and they kept eating.

1001
00:45:46,640 --> 00:45:48,880
Speaker 3: They never do this, so they hadn't been fed in

1002
00:45:48,960 --> 00:45:51,560
Speaker 3: a long time. Thank you for reading this far. I

1003
00:45:51,640 --> 00:45:54,040
Speaker 3: want to know what is every single step I should

1004
00:45:54,080 --> 00:45:56,680
Speaker 3: take next. I've already made a report to Rover. I

1005
00:45:56,719 --> 00:45:59,080
Speaker 3: can't call their number until I'm back in the country.

1006
00:45:59,120 --> 00:46:01,879
Speaker 3: At my layover around six thirty pm today, I sent

1007
00:46:01,920 --> 00:46:04,360
Speaker 3: them all the pictures from my friend and the video

1008
00:46:04,400 --> 00:46:06,759
Speaker 3: from my camera of her falling over. They're sending it

1009
00:46:06,920 --> 00:46:09,759
Speaker 3: to their trust and Safety team and said I should

1010
00:46:09,760 --> 00:46:12,359
Speaker 3: get a response within twenty four hours. They've offered no

1011
00:46:12,480 --> 00:46:15,160
Speaker 3: alternatives to pet care. In the meantime, my friend spoke

1012
00:46:15,200 --> 00:46:18,440
Speaker 3: with the police and they said her stuff is abandoned property,

1013
00:46:18,600 --> 00:46:20,960
Speaker 3: so have her car towed and do whatever with her

1014
00:46:20,960 --> 00:46:23,239
Speaker 3: things inside my house. If she comes back, I can

1015
00:46:23,320 --> 00:46:25,239
Speaker 3: keep her stuff until I'm home and make sure she

1016
00:46:25,280 --> 00:46:28,240
Speaker 3: only leaves with her things. I've deactivated her door code

1017
00:46:28,280 --> 00:46:30,560
Speaker 3: so it won't work and all doors are locked, but

1018
00:46:30,640 --> 00:46:33,399
Speaker 3: I'll see if she attempts to come back and use

1019
00:46:33,440 --> 00:46:35,759
Speaker 3: her code. Her car is still in my driveway. My

1020
00:46:35,800 --> 00:46:39,640
Speaker 3: friend peeked inside and saw synthetic urine inside. I have

1021
00:46:39,800 --> 00:46:43,839
Speaker 3: not had any communication since the message Wednesday how much

1022
00:46:43,960 --> 00:46:47,160
Speaker 3: liability is on Rover? And there's some comments Yeah, I

1023
00:46:47,200 --> 00:46:49,879
Speaker 3: feel like this op doesn't have any questions other than

1024
00:46:49,960 --> 00:46:52,160
Speaker 3: who do I need to sue and how hard can

1025
00:46:52,200 --> 00:46:54,799
Speaker 3: I sue them? Bulky District twenty seven to fifty seven

1026
00:46:54,840 --> 00:46:58,719
Speaker 3: says this is insane. I'd imagine Rover will refund you

1027
00:46:58,880 --> 00:47:02,240
Speaker 3: and then ban this. Opie says, I do also feel

1028
00:47:02,280 --> 00:47:04,759
Speaker 3: like that much is guaranteed. I'm not sure about the

1029
00:47:04,800 --> 00:47:08,080
Speaker 3: several one hundred dollars in drink she has consumed. Is

1030
00:47:08,120 --> 00:47:10,279
Speaker 3: that a civil suit? Can I even get her info

1031
00:47:10,400 --> 00:47:12,200
Speaker 3: from Rover to be able to file that? And I

1032
00:47:12,239 --> 00:47:14,960
Speaker 3: have no idea the cost of the toilet repair. Scooty

1033
00:47:15,000 --> 00:47:18,160
Speaker 3: Duty says, Hey, so she got really effed up and

1034
00:47:18,200 --> 00:47:20,719
Speaker 3: a man came and took her away, and she never

1035
00:47:20,760 --> 00:47:22,799
Speaker 3: returned for her car or any of her stuff. Am

1036
00:47:22,800 --> 00:47:25,520
Speaker 3: I the only one actually concerned for the sitters well being?

1037
00:47:25,600 --> 00:47:28,239
Speaker 3: What if she's been kidnapped? She had good reviews and

1038
00:47:28,360 --> 00:47:29,960
Speaker 3: one and a half years of them to boot. This

1039
00:47:30,040 --> 00:47:32,399
Speaker 3: is really abnormal behavior from what I can see. Opie

1040
00:47:32,440 --> 00:47:34,600
Speaker 3: says she definitely knew the man who showed up. He

1041
00:47:34,640 --> 00:47:36,880
Speaker 3: seemed concerned when he first got there, and he stayed

1042
00:47:36,880 --> 00:47:38,840
Speaker 3: for a while before they left together. He was helping

1043
00:47:38,840 --> 00:47:40,839
Speaker 3: her to the car. It seemed like he came to help.

1044
00:47:40,920 --> 00:47:44,560
Speaker 3: Opie replies, I was also wondering how someone with this

1045
00:47:44,840 --> 00:47:47,719
Speaker 3: level of substance use could have passed the background check.

1046
00:47:47,800 --> 00:47:50,040
Speaker 3: I have her last name because she has business cards

1047
00:47:50,040 --> 00:47:53,160
Speaker 3: in her purse. In a vague address from the Rover profile,

1048
00:47:53,239 --> 00:47:56,520
Speaker 3: Anna x D says, none of the substances that were

1049
00:47:56,560 --> 00:47:58,680
Speaker 3: being used or illegal, So as long as the sitter

1050
00:47:58,760 --> 00:48:03,160
Speaker 3: hasn't committed a crime adject to regular using theft, dui,

1051
00:48:03,440 --> 00:48:05,920
Speaker 3: et cetera, there's no reason why they would not pass

1052
00:48:05,960 --> 00:48:08,080
Speaker 3: a background check. Sounds like the sitter is smart, enough

1053
00:48:08,120 --> 00:48:10,920
Speaker 3: to have a designated driver if they left their vehicle

1054
00:48:10,960 --> 00:48:13,760
Speaker 3: in Ope's driveway. However, it seems like their sticky finger

1055
00:48:13,840 --> 00:48:17,160
Speaker 3: will eventually land them a theft chart. Op says, well,

1056
00:48:17,239 --> 00:48:20,319
Speaker 3: it's theft now. All the liquor bottles were mine, and

1057
00:48:20,400 --> 00:48:22,960
Speaker 3: the seltzers and there's an update. After going through the

1058
00:48:23,000 --> 00:48:26,400
Speaker 3: whole house. There were methyl carba maol pills scattered everywhere

1059
00:48:26,400 --> 00:48:29,640
Speaker 3: throughout her things, as well as a few pseudo fed amoxicillin,

1060
00:48:29,680 --> 00:48:31,759
Speaker 3: another vape, and many, many, many, many many of those

1061
00:48:31,840 --> 00:48:35,800
Speaker 3: little boxes of crowd inside her box of cosmetics, inside

1062
00:48:36,000 --> 00:48:39,280
Speaker 3: her box of yarn and crochet supplies, inside multiple pockets

1063
00:48:39,320 --> 00:48:41,759
Speaker 3: of her purse. I threw all of it away. She

1064
00:48:41,880 --> 00:48:44,920
Speaker 3: has a prescription bottle for certraline. It was on the

1065
00:48:44,960 --> 00:48:47,319
Speaker 3: floor in a bag, and thank god my dogs didn't

1066
00:48:47,320 --> 00:48:49,560
Speaker 3: get into it. My custom built gaming table, the floor

1067
00:48:49,640 --> 00:48:51,640
Speaker 3: under it, and the chair that was on that end

1068
00:48:51,680 --> 00:48:54,840
Speaker 3: of the table are all incredibly sticky and nasty. Multiple

1069
00:48:54,880 --> 00:48:57,120
Speaker 3: towels were in the washing machine. The towel on the

1070
00:48:57,120 --> 00:49:00,600
Speaker 3: floor of the spare bath smells like wrap her clothes

1071
00:49:00,640 --> 00:49:02,920
Speaker 3: in the spare room. The main bath was clogged because

1072
00:49:02,960 --> 00:49:05,160
Speaker 3: the tank was empty, because the water was shut off.

1073
00:49:05,160 --> 00:49:08,000
Speaker 3: It appears to be flushing now, hopefully that's functional. The

1074
00:49:08,080 --> 00:49:12,160
Speaker 3: toilet is stinky, nasty. The spare bath is stinky nasty.

1075
00:49:12,280 --> 00:49:14,120
Speaker 3: The dogs were happy to see me. I brought them

1076
00:49:14,200 --> 00:49:17,120
Speaker 3: chicken nuggets I turned my back, and a guinea ate

1077
00:49:17,239 --> 00:49:20,799
Speaker 3: half my burger bun two that countersurfing goon. Both are

1078
00:49:20,840 --> 00:49:23,160
Speaker 3: currently napping on either side of me. I'll investigate the

1079
00:49:23,239 --> 00:49:25,200
Speaker 3: yard in the morning, given that I found some empty

1080
00:49:25,400 --> 00:49:28,520
Speaker 3: hands and a cigarette butt on the front porch. Her

1081
00:49:28,520 --> 00:49:31,840
Speaker 3: car is still out front. It's parked entirely off the street,

1082
00:49:31,920 --> 00:49:34,320
Speaker 3: with all four wheels in the grass between my yard

1083
00:49:34,360 --> 00:49:36,680
Speaker 3: and my neighbor's yard. I'm still going through all the

1084
00:49:36,719 --> 00:49:40,040
Speaker 3: camera footage, and there's more. The man was there longer,

1085
00:49:40,080 --> 00:49:43,000
Speaker 3: and she stumbled into the house at nine am Wednesday.

1086
00:49:43,120 --> 00:49:45,799
Speaker 3: I think they were gone all Tuesday night. I will

1087
00:49:45,880 --> 00:49:48,239
Speaker 3: update once I can finish reviewing all that No new

1088
00:49:48,280 --> 00:49:52,760
Speaker 3: responses from Rover. Update two five days later. I finished

1089
00:49:52,760 --> 00:49:55,319
Speaker 3: reviewing all of the camera footage. Took most of the

1090
00:49:55,320 --> 00:49:58,279
Speaker 3: Saturday and Sunday. After arriving home, the sitter arrived at

1091
00:49:58,280 --> 00:50:01,280
Speaker 3: my home at ten thirty am Saturday. I hadn't requested

1092
00:50:01,360 --> 00:50:03,440
Speaker 3: her to start until the afternoon, but she said she

1093
00:50:03,520 --> 00:50:05,440
Speaker 3: happened to be off work but would show up early.

1094
00:50:05,560 --> 00:50:08,560
Speaker 3: She started drinking the Seltzers on the front porch at

1095
00:50:08,640 --> 00:50:11,880
Speaker 3: eleven am that day. She notices the camera and tries

1096
00:50:11,960 --> 00:50:14,320
Speaker 3: to hide the cans in her dress as she drinks

1097
00:50:14,360 --> 00:50:18,960
Speaker 3: them outside. Saturday and Sunday, she also smokes outside those days.

1098
00:50:19,120 --> 00:50:22,680
Speaker 3: I found an empty box of the Devil's letters and

1099
00:50:22,719 --> 00:50:25,080
Speaker 3: saw her bring that into the house. Plus I found

1100
00:50:25,120 --> 00:50:27,719
Speaker 3: a lighter. I assume that's what she was smoking. Her

1101
00:50:27,719 --> 00:50:30,440
Speaker 3: boyfriend starts showing up on Tuesday and shows up every

1102
00:50:30,520 --> 00:50:33,200
Speaker 3: day after that, usually twice a day. I've never met

1103
00:50:33,239 --> 00:50:36,200
Speaker 3: him and never agreed to allow him in my house.

1104
00:50:36,280 --> 00:50:39,800
Speaker 3: She appears wasted while leaving Tuesday at six thirty pm,

1105
00:50:39,840 --> 00:50:42,879
Speaker 3: and no one returns until she comes back Wednesday at

1106
00:50:42,880 --> 00:50:46,120
Speaker 3: eight thirty am, also stumbling. She sent me an update

1107
00:50:46,200 --> 00:50:49,520
Speaker 3: at three thirty am while not even at my house,

1108
00:50:49,600 --> 00:50:51,920
Speaker 3: to say she had a stomach bug and ask about

1109
00:50:51,960 --> 00:50:54,760
Speaker 3: my one dog barking in the bathroom. I responded saying

1110
00:50:54,960 --> 00:50:57,719
Speaker 3: she was asking for water. That was the last communication

1111
00:50:57,800 --> 00:50:59,920
Speaker 3: I had from her until Friday morning, when her boy

1112
00:51:00,080 --> 00:51:02,080
Speaker 3: friend tried to get into the house with her code

1113
00:51:02,120 --> 00:51:05,279
Speaker 3: I sent several messages and requests for updates via rover

1114
00:51:05,400 --> 00:51:07,839
Speaker 3: and WhatsApp, but didn't hear back. First time my door

1115
00:51:07,880 --> 00:51:11,000
Speaker 3: opens on Thursday is at three forty five pm, when

1116
00:51:11,040 --> 00:51:13,760
Speaker 3: her boyfriend shows up. It's possible she let the dogs

1117
00:51:13,800 --> 00:51:16,319
Speaker 3: out in the backyard, but until then they had been

1118
00:51:16,360 --> 00:51:19,640
Speaker 3: going out the side door with the camera quite often,

1119
00:51:19,760 --> 00:51:21,960
Speaker 3: so I suspect they weren't let out at all that day.

1120
00:51:22,040 --> 00:51:24,560
Speaker 3: Watching the full video, her boyfriend has a moment of

1121
00:51:24,640 --> 00:51:28,640
Speaker 3: breaking down crying, facing the outdoor camera with his back

1122
00:51:28,680 --> 00:51:31,359
Speaker 3: to her after finding her, so I don't think he

1123
00:51:31,400 --> 00:51:34,600
Speaker 3: was encouraging her to drink. His full comment after listening

1124
00:51:34,719 --> 00:51:38,160
Speaker 3: very closely, is take one last shot and then we'll go.

1125
00:51:38,280 --> 00:51:41,560
Speaker 3: And there's another quieter we got to get out of here.

1126
00:51:41,640 --> 00:51:43,879
Speaker 3: I think he was just trying to convince her to leave.

1127
00:51:43,960 --> 00:51:46,640
Speaker 3: I do think it's possible she was actually in the hospital.

1128
00:51:46,760 --> 00:51:48,839
Speaker 3: I never saw anyone else show up to the house,

1129
00:51:48,840 --> 00:51:51,520
Speaker 3: so given how much she drank, she absolutely should have

1130
00:51:51,560 --> 00:51:54,080
Speaker 3: been in the hospital. In general, the videos were a

1131
00:51:54,120 --> 00:51:58,080
Speaker 3: lot of just the dogs being outside, barking to come in,

1132
00:51:58,280 --> 00:52:02,719
Speaker 3: wandering around, and Ginny begging for someone to throw her frisbee.

1133
00:52:02,760 --> 00:52:05,040
Speaker 3: It was so hard to watch them be ignored like that.

1134
00:52:05,120 --> 00:52:07,319
Speaker 3: I feel guilty for not keeping a closer eye on

1135
00:52:07,360 --> 00:52:10,280
Speaker 3: my camera. I normally watched the door locking and unlocking

1136
00:52:10,360 --> 00:52:13,000
Speaker 3: and use that to check the camera, but she wasn't

1137
00:52:13,040 --> 00:52:15,800
Speaker 3: locking it even overnight or when she left the house.

1138
00:52:15,880 --> 00:52:17,880
Speaker 3: I know I wouldn't have caught the early signs of

1139
00:52:17,960 --> 00:52:20,520
Speaker 3: drinking the seltzers unless I was watching every single video.

1140
00:52:20,600 --> 00:52:23,760
Speaker 3: But I'm feeling the parent guilt over everything my babies

1141
00:52:23,800 --> 00:52:26,360
Speaker 3: went through. I've written out a full timeline of events,

1142
00:52:26,480 --> 00:52:30,200
Speaker 3: saved all relevant videos, saved screenshots of all conversations on

1143
00:52:30,239 --> 00:52:33,560
Speaker 3: WhatsApp and Rover, printed all emails with Rover, included a

1144
00:52:33,560 --> 00:52:36,960
Speaker 3: copy of my dogs sitting instructions, and collected every photo

1145
00:52:37,000 --> 00:52:40,120
Speaker 3: from myself and my friends. I updated the itemized list

1146
00:52:40,239 --> 00:52:42,839
Speaker 3: to include the actual amount of time my friend spent there,

1147
00:52:42,920 --> 00:52:46,680
Speaker 3: screenshots of ubercosts and things like that, plus court costs.

1148
00:52:46,760 --> 00:52:49,279
Speaker 3: I ordered all photos to be printed to bring to court.

1149
00:52:49,360 --> 00:52:51,600
Speaker 3: I'm not sure how to share the videos other than

1150
00:52:51,640 --> 00:52:54,080
Speaker 3: bring my tablet court with me, but I took the

1151
00:52:54,120 --> 00:52:57,239
Speaker 3: most damning screenshot from every video and added that to

1152
00:52:57,280 --> 00:52:59,920
Speaker 3: the printed photos. I officially filed paperwork for a civil

1153
00:53:00,160 --> 00:53:02,839
Speaker 3: suit against her and the sheriff has everything to serve her.

1154
00:53:02,880 --> 00:53:05,480
Speaker 3: After double checking all the costs of everything, getting the

1155
00:53:05,520 --> 00:53:08,880
Speaker 3: total from the housekeeper, and adding the court related costs,

1156
00:53:08,960 --> 00:53:11,480
Speaker 3: I'm suing for eleven hundred and twenty four dollars. If

1157
00:53:11,520 --> 00:53:13,919
Speaker 3: all goes well, court will be mid May. I'm sorry,

1158
00:53:13,960 --> 00:53:16,320
Speaker 3: I hate to say this. OP. Maybe I'm just a cynic.

1159
00:53:16,360 --> 00:53:18,920
Speaker 3: You're not getting that money. You're You're not going to

1160
00:53:19,000 --> 00:53:23,800
Speaker 3: get that money from her until the government garnishes her bank.

1161
00:53:24,200 --> 00:53:26,960
Speaker 3: I searched public records in my area for her, and

1162
00:53:27,000 --> 00:53:29,800
Speaker 3: she has no records for crimes or probation that I

1163
00:53:29,840 --> 00:53:32,680
Speaker 3: could find. I'm guessing the synthetic urine was to pass

1164
00:53:32,760 --> 00:53:34,879
Speaker 3: a substance screen for work. I was able to get

1165
00:53:34,880 --> 00:53:37,200
Speaker 3: a housekeeper to come Monday to help with the sticky

1166
00:53:37,239 --> 00:53:40,160
Speaker 3: mess and gross bathrooms. I've been doing laundry for days

1167
00:53:40,200 --> 00:53:43,520
Speaker 3: in between all the documentation. Everything in my house feels

1168
00:53:43,560 --> 00:53:47,120
Speaker 3: gross and violated. The pups are acting relatively normal, maybe

1169
00:53:47,160 --> 00:53:50,000
Speaker 3: a little more tired than usual. The Independent hound dog

1170
00:53:50,200 --> 00:53:53,640
Speaker 3: is definitely clingier than usual and actually listening when I

1171
00:53:53,640 --> 00:53:56,120
Speaker 3: tell her to come. The Carolina dog couldn't possibly get

1172
00:53:56,120 --> 00:53:59,040
Speaker 3: more clinge than she already was, and she's acting perfectly normal.

1173
00:53:59,040 --> 00:54:01,960
Speaker 3: The vet said after six days without it, the prozac

1174
00:54:02,120 --> 00:54:04,359
Speaker 3: is basically out of Jenny's system and it could take

1175
00:54:04,400 --> 00:54:06,600
Speaker 3: another six to eight weeks to see full effects again.

1176
00:54:06,640 --> 00:54:08,440
Speaker 3: There's also a chance it will not work at all

1177
00:54:08,480 --> 00:54:11,520
Speaker 3: anymore after suddenly stopping it. So far, it does seem

1178
00:54:11,560 --> 00:54:14,040
Speaker 3: she's calmer, so I'm hoping she's feeling better to be

1179
00:54:14,120 --> 00:54:17,320
Speaker 3: back on it and home safe with Mama. Relevant comments,

1180
00:54:17,600 --> 00:54:20,960
Speaker 3: super Crush says, I've been waiting for this update. I

1181
00:54:21,000 --> 00:54:24,000
Speaker 3: cannot imagine how someone could do this while responsible for

1182
00:54:24,040 --> 00:54:27,399
Speaker 3: someone else's babies, slash in another person's home. I wish

1183
00:54:27,440 --> 00:54:29,080
Speaker 3: you all the best with your case and hope to

1184
00:54:29,080 --> 00:54:31,960
Speaker 3: get more updates. As the sitter said, anything else to you,

1185
00:54:32,040 --> 00:54:34,360
Speaker 3: OPI says, not sure if you read all the updates

1186
00:54:34,400 --> 00:54:37,120
Speaker 3: on the other post. So she apologized for making me

1187
00:54:37,200 --> 00:54:39,520
Speaker 3: uncomfortable and leaving my house a mess and said she

1188
00:54:39,560 --> 00:54:43,040
Speaker 3: hadn't drank in nine years, then threatened me for keeping

1189
00:54:43,120 --> 00:54:45,719
Speaker 3: her things. I said that her things were in her

1190
00:54:45,760 --> 00:54:48,080
Speaker 3: car and it had been towed, and if she wanted

1191
00:54:48,120 --> 00:54:50,480
Speaker 3: to settle things out of court, here's the itemized list.

1192
00:54:50,640 --> 00:54:53,520
Speaker 3: I listed out all of the drink cleaning fees and

1193
00:54:53,719 --> 00:54:56,520
Speaker 3: extra sitters for three check ins. After she left, she

1194
00:54:56,560 --> 00:54:58,759
Speaker 3: said she'll have her lawyer call me, and this is

1195
00:54:58,800 --> 00:55:01,120
Speaker 3: a cease and desist. I haven't heard anything from her

1196
00:55:01,160 --> 00:55:04,000
Speaker 3: since then. So when discussing what costs to add to

1197
00:55:04,040 --> 00:55:07,279
Speaker 3: the civil suit, mind over Enterpie says, you're the time

1198
00:55:07,320 --> 00:55:09,879
Speaker 3: you spent cleaning the vet costs and the time there

1199
00:55:09,920 --> 00:55:12,040
Speaker 3: should also be included. And I hope they were prior

1200
00:55:12,120 --> 00:55:14,279
Speaker 3: talk seventy seven to twenty six says, and you said

1201
00:55:14,320 --> 00:55:16,880
Speaker 3: you hired a house cleaner, include that too, Ope replies,

1202
00:55:16,960 --> 00:55:18,880
Speaker 3: I included the house cleaner with a receipts signed by

1203
00:55:18,920 --> 00:55:21,200
Speaker 3: both of us. I haven't included my time spent cleaning.

1204
00:55:21,239 --> 00:55:22,799
Speaker 3: I can bring that up in court and see what

1205
00:55:22,880 --> 00:55:25,960
Speaker 3: they say. Shrinking Nadia said, And the time your friend

1206
00:55:26,000 --> 00:55:28,280
Speaker 3: took to go over and check things out and consider

1207
00:55:28,360 --> 00:55:31,080
Speaker 3: a lawyer OPI says, Yes, I included Uber for friends

1208
00:55:31,120 --> 00:55:33,359
Speaker 3: and the time they spent there for the three check

1209
00:55:33,400 --> 00:55:35,200
Speaker 3: ins until I could get home. And we have a

1210
00:55:35,239 --> 00:55:38,560
Speaker 3: third update. So I showed up at the most recent

1211
00:55:38,719 --> 00:55:41,279
Speaker 3: court date. I tried to have the sheriff serve her

1212
00:55:41,400 --> 00:55:45,880
Speaker 3: paperwork returned as multiple failed attempts, I sent certified mail

1213
00:55:45,960 --> 00:55:49,479
Speaker 3: to her home and returned undeliverable. I sent certified mail

1214
00:55:49,480 --> 00:55:52,120
Speaker 3: to her business and someone not her signed for it,

1215
00:55:52,160 --> 00:55:54,040
Speaker 3: and that was returned to the court as well. The

1216
00:55:54,120 --> 00:55:56,360
Speaker 3: judge said that I have to continue to attempt and

1217
00:55:56,400 --> 00:55:58,600
Speaker 3: they cannot hear the case until she is served. My

1218
00:55:58,719 --> 00:56:01,480
Speaker 3: only allowed options for serve her are via sheriff or

1219
00:56:01,480 --> 00:56:04,120
Speaker 3: certified mail. So I need help. How do I find

1220
00:56:04,120 --> 00:56:06,400
Speaker 3: her and get her served? The sheriff in post office

1221
00:56:06,480 --> 00:56:08,960
Speaker 3: left notes that they attempted to reach her, so she

1222
00:56:09,040 --> 00:56:12,040
Speaker 3: knows I'm after her. I have the following information on

1223
00:56:12,120 --> 00:56:14,600
Speaker 3: her because of everything she left in my house, which

1224
00:56:14,600 --> 00:56:17,120
Speaker 3: has since been returned. Her full name address at the

1225
00:56:17,120 --> 00:56:19,799
Speaker 3: time of events, her frequently used user names from her

1226
00:56:19,840 --> 00:56:22,800
Speaker 3: cash app, credit card, her social Security number, Her card

1227
00:56:22,920 --> 00:56:25,400
Speaker 3: was in her things, prent and former driver's license, her

1228
00:56:25,400 --> 00:56:29,960
Speaker 3: past workplaces, and her now expired car dealership seller license number.

1229
00:56:30,080 --> 00:56:33,400
Speaker 3: It's not searchable. Unfortunately, I found her Facebook page that

1230
00:56:33,400 --> 00:56:36,160
Speaker 3: has minimal public info, Instagram that is barely used in

1231
00:56:36,200 --> 00:56:39,320
Speaker 3: a reddited account frequently used, but nothing on this subredit.

1232
00:56:39,360 --> 00:56:41,080
Speaker 3: Based on what I have, it looks like she moved

1233
00:56:41,080 --> 00:56:42,960
Speaker 3: to another city two and a half hours away, but

1234
00:56:43,120 --> 00:56:45,160
Speaker 3: in the same state. I'm not sure if it's allowed

1235
00:56:45,160 --> 00:56:47,720
Speaker 3: to post the state, but that's super relevant because legal

1236
00:56:47,719 --> 00:56:50,480
Speaker 3: issues vary so wildly from state to state. So I'll

1237
00:56:50,520 --> 00:56:52,319
Speaker 3: put it in a comment in case that needs to

1238
00:56:52,320 --> 00:56:56,759
Speaker 3: be deleted irrelevant comments. Op says the state is North Carolina.

1239
00:56:56,800 --> 00:57:01,239
Speaker 3: Why not hire someone to serve her hilarious individuals aren't

1240
00:57:01,280 --> 00:57:03,439
Speaker 3: allowed to serve in my state, unfortunately, or I would

1241
00:57:03,440 --> 00:57:05,600
Speaker 3: absolutely be down for such antics. And that is the

1242
00:57:05,680 --> 00:57:06,400
Speaker 3: end of that story.

1243
00:57:06,480 --> 00:57:08,920
Speaker 7: Oh wow, wow, it's over just like that.

1244
00:57:09,160 --> 00:57:10,880
Speaker 3: So this is what you need to do is a

1245
00:57:10,880 --> 00:57:13,520
Speaker 3: good old fashioned public shaming. People need to know that

1246
00:57:13,600 --> 00:57:16,360
Speaker 3: they can't trust this person to come into their homes.

1247
00:57:16,360 --> 00:57:18,600
Speaker 3: They can't trust this person in their place of business.

1248
00:57:18,880 --> 00:57:20,720
Speaker 3: People need to know that they cannot trust this person

1249
00:57:20,760 --> 00:57:22,240
Speaker 3: around their medication, at their pets.

1250
00:57:22,440 --> 00:57:25,440
Speaker 7: Yeah, like, I mean, if this is bad press website, like,

1251
00:57:25,600 --> 00:57:27,000
Speaker 7: but that's not our fop.

1252
00:57:28,200 --> 00:57:30,240
Speaker 1: Hey, it's Sam, your ogi host here. Bring it back

1253
00:57:30,280 --> 00:57:32,400
Speaker 1: to the stories. But here's three minutes bads from our sponsor.

1254
00:57:32,960 --> 00:57:35,880
Speaker 6: My neighbor left her kids on my porch for me

1255
00:57:35,960 --> 00:57:40,720
Speaker 6: to babysit without any notice. For context, I seventeen female

1256
00:57:40,800 --> 00:57:43,640
Speaker 6: live with my dad and his mother. My grandma adores kids,

1257
00:57:43,680 --> 00:57:46,120
Speaker 6: and they love her too. Whenever we go to family gatherings,

1258
00:57:46,160 --> 00:57:47,280
Speaker 6: they all swarm her.

1259
00:57:47,400 --> 00:57:48,240
Speaker 7: I am the opposite.

1260
00:57:48,360 --> 00:57:50,200
Speaker 6: I don't like being around kids and avoid them at

1261
00:57:50,240 --> 00:57:51,960
Speaker 6: all times if possible, as.

1262
00:57:51,800 --> 00:57:53,320
Speaker 7: They worsen my anxiety.

1263
00:57:53,360 --> 00:57:56,520
Speaker 6: By the way, this comes from your mother's secret lover

1264
00:57:57,000 --> 00:57:58,680
Speaker 6: and if you want to sum in your own stories,

1265
00:57:58,720 --> 00:58:00,520
Speaker 6: go to the our slash Okay story time separad it.

1266
00:58:00,720 --> 00:58:03,080
Speaker 6: So it's been made clear to my family that I

1267
00:58:03,080 --> 00:58:05,680
Speaker 6: am not a babysitter unless it is a genuine emergency,

1268
00:58:05,960 --> 00:58:08,160
Speaker 6: and I am the last resort.

1269
00:58:08,360 --> 00:58:09,760
Speaker 7: Call me selfish for that ifty one.

1270
00:58:09,840 --> 00:58:12,520
Speaker 6: But being around little kids causes anxiety attacks due to

1271
00:58:12,560 --> 00:58:15,200
Speaker 6: some past situations with my mother that I won't dive into.

1272
00:58:15,400 --> 00:58:18,040
Speaker 6: Despite that, my grandma told my neighbors, not sure if

1273
00:58:18,080 --> 00:58:21,080
Speaker 6: their ages I'll call them Stacy and John, that if

1274
00:58:21,120 --> 00:58:24,560
Speaker 6: there was ever an emergency or their preferred sitter canceled,

1275
00:58:24,600 --> 00:58:26,560
Speaker 6: she would watch their two daughters.

1276
00:58:26,280 --> 00:58:29,560
Speaker 7: I believe around six female and nine female.

1277
00:58:29,560 --> 00:58:32,560
Speaker 6: This luckily doesn't happen very often, and I've never argued

1278
00:58:32,560 --> 00:58:34,760
Speaker 6: about this because it's my grandma's house.

1279
00:58:34,560 --> 00:58:36,520
Speaker 7: And I can simply stay in my room until the

1280
00:58:36,600 --> 00:58:37,160
Speaker 7: kids leave.

1281
00:58:37,240 --> 00:58:40,400
Speaker 6: This past Friday, John had a stroke and Stacy dropped

1282
00:58:40,400 --> 00:58:42,320
Speaker 6: everything to rush him to the hospital. But at the

1283
00:58:42,360 --> 00:58:45,040
Speaker 6: time I didn't know this, seeing as Stacy dropped the

1284
00:58:45,080 --> 00:58:47,000
Speaker 6: two girls off on our porch and didn't wait for

1285
00:58:47,000 --> 00:58:49,400
Speaker 6: anyone to answer the door before rushing off. The only

1286
00:58:49,440 --> 00:58:51,680
Speaker 6: issues that my dad was in another state to celebrate

1287
00:58:51,720 --> 00:58:54,440
Speaker 6: the fourth and my Grandma was multiple cities over and

1288
00:58:54,480 --> 00:58:56,960
Speaker 6: wouldn't be home until later that night. I couldn't call

1289
00:58:57,000 --> 00:58:59,280
Speaker 6: her as her location tracking app said that her phone

1290
00:58:59,320 --> 00:59:02,440
Speaker 6: passed away, and when I tried calling the family she

1291
00:59:02,720 --> 00:59:04,120
Speaker 6: was with that they didn't pick up.

1292
00:59:04,160 --> 00:59:04,960
Speaker 3: I don't know what to.

1293
00:59:04,920 --> 00:59:07,520
Speaker 6: Do with little kids, seeing as I don't babysit and

1294
00:59:07,640 --> 00:59:09,440
Speaker 6: haven't been around a child willingly in.

1295
00:59:09,480 --> 00:59:11,720
Speaker 7: Years, so I did my best with what I had.

1296
00:59:11,880 --> 00:59:14,800
Speaker 6: I made them chicken nuggets and fries, turned on Disney,

1297
00:59:14,800 --> 00:59:17,040
Speaker 6: and sat on the couch watching them, waiting until someone

1298
00:59:17,080 --> 00:59:19,400
Speaker 6: else got home. The girls didn't complain, but I was

1299
00:59:19,520 --> 00:59:22,720
Speaker 6: very uncomfortable the entire time, seeing my neighbor's car wasn't

1300
00:59:22,760 --> 00:59:25,520
Speaker 6: in the driveway, and knowing about their prior agreement with

1301
00:59:25,560 --> 00:59:28,160
Speaker 6: my grandma. I would have felt guilty turning them away,

1302
00:59:28,320 --> 00:59:29,640
Speaker 6: so I decided to just suck it.

1303
00:59:29,720 --> 00:59:30,880
Speaker 7: Up despite the anxiety.

1304
00:59:30,920 --> 00:59:32,760
Speaker 6: When my grandma came home, she told me that she

1305
00:59:32,800 --> 00:59:35,000
Speaker 6: had charged her phone in the car on the way,

1306
00:59:35,040 --> 00:59:37,600
Speaker 6: and Stacy had called her, letting her know about John's

1307
00:59:37,600 --> 00:59:39,919
Speaker 6: stroke and why she gave my grandma no notice about

1308
00:59:40,000 --> 00:59:42,280
Speaker 6: leaving them, to which my grandma replied she hadn't been

1309
00:59:42,320 --> 00:59:44,640
Speaker 6: home all night. I explained everything to my grandma, and

1310
00:59:44,680 --> 00:59:46,680
Speaker 6: she apologized for putting me in that position, but I

1311
00:59:46,760 --> 00:59:48,920
Speaker 6: told her it wasn't her fault and just asked that

1312
00:59:49,000 --> 00:59:51,000
Speaker 6: she tell the neighbors to make sure she or my

1313
00:59:51,080 --> 00:59:53,360
Speaker 6: dad is home in the future to avoid this happening again.

1314
00:59:53,480 --> 00:59:56,240
Speaker 6: I also said this situation was an exception, as it

1315
00:59:56,280 --> 00:59:58,440
Speaker 6: was an emergency, but I did feel a certain kind

1316
00:59:58,440 --> 01:00:00,640
Speaker 6: of way about her leaving her kids on the poor unintended.

1317
01:00:00,720 --> 01:00:02,920
Speaker 6: All the lights, rob and my parents' cars were gone,

1318
01:00:03,040 --> 01:00:05,680
Speaker 6: no indication that anyone was home. She said she understood,

1319
01:00:05,720 --> 01:00:07,840
Speaker 6: and I thought the situation was done and over with.

1320
01:00:08,080 --> 01:00:10,040
Speaker 6: That was until my neighbor came.

1321
01:00:09,960 --> 01:00:12,480
Speaker 7: Knocking on my front door while my parents were both working.

1322
01:00:12,560 --> 01:00:15,160
Speaker 6: She did not yell at me, but very passive aggressively

1323
01:00:15,240 --> 01:00:17,480
Speaker 6: stated that she was sorry her kids made me so

1324
01:00:17,560 --> 01:00:19,840
Speaker 6: uncomfortable and so that I shouldn't have fed the kid's

1325
01:00:19,920 --> 01:00:22,400
Speaker 6: chicken without consulting her first, as they were trying to

1326
01:00:22,400 --> 01:00:25,880
Speaker 6: go vegetarian. Nine female had watched some kind of documentary

1327
01:00:25,880 --> 01:00:27,600
Speaker 6: and didn't want anyone in the house eating meat.

1328
01:00:27,680 --> 01:00:28,760
Speaker 3: Probably just was like.

1329
01:00:28,840 --> 01:00:31,720
Speaker 7: I don't want to hurt animals, and then and then

1330
01:00:31,840 --> 01:00:32,959
Speaker 7: was like we all have just dot.

1331
01:00:33,080 --> 01:00:35,760
Speaker 6: I apologized, but stated how exactly she would expect me

1332
01:00:35,840 --> 01:00:38,360
Speaker 6: to know that, seeing as I don't regularly interact with

1333
01:00:38,400 --> 01:00:40,560
Speaker 6: her john and that the kids didn't mention it to me.

1334
01:00:40,640 --> 01:00:43,280
Speaker 6: Nine female didn't eat the chicken, but didn't say anything

1335
01:00:43,280 --> 01:00:45,480
Speaker 6: to indicate that she was uncomfortable with her or her

1336
01:00:45,520 --> 01:00:47,720
Speaker 6: sister eating it. I will admit my tone was rude.

1337
01:00:47,760 --> 01:00:50,480
Speaker 6: I tend to get snappy and irritated during confrontations. She

1338
01:00:50,520 --> 01:00:52,680
Speaker 6: said she was surprised my grandma didn't tell me, and

1339
01:00:52,720 --> 01:00:54,880
Speaker 6: said that next time she'd make sure to give me

1340
01:00:54,920 --> 01:00:57,000
Speaker 6: a heads up when her husband had a stroke and

1341
01:00:57,080 --> 01:00:59,720
Speaker 6: I'd have to suffer with her children. I understand how

1342
01:00:59,720 --> 01:01:01,600
Speaker 6: hard it is when a loved one has a stroke.

1343
01:01:01,720 --> 01:01:03,640
Speaker 6: My dad had one last year, so I don't expect

1344
01:01:03,680 --> 01:01:06,200
Speaker 6: her to be completely rational right now, and I understand

1345
01:01:06,200 --> 01:01:08,480
Speaker 6: the frustration when my grandma got home from work. She

1346
01:01:08,480 --> 01:01:10,680
Speaker 6: showed me messages from Stacy saying that she and John

1347
01:01:10,720 --> 01:01:13,440
Speaker 6: had been appalled by my behavior, that I shouldn't be

1348
01:01:13,520 --> 01:01:17,200
Speaker 6: left around kids, just like I've been preaching for years,

1349
01:01:17,720 --> 01:01:21,080
Speaker 6: and suggested to my grandma I get some kind of lessons.

1350
01:01:21,200 --> 01:01:23,040
Speaker 6: I'm not sure if she meant a parenting class or

1351
01:01:23,080 --> 01:01:25,920
Speaker 6: something else on how to responsibly watch children should this

1352
01:01:26,000 --> 01:01:29,080
Speaker 6: happen again. My grandma politely declined the lessons, but said

1353
01:01:29,080 --> 01:01:31,000
Speaker 6: that she would talk to me after showing me the text.

1354
01:01:31,080 --> 01:01:33,120
Speaker 6: She says she understood my anxiety, but that I shouldn't

1355
01:01:33,120 --> 01:01:35,000
Speaker 6: have been so rude and it wasn't a big deal

1356
01:01:35,040 --> 01:01:36,640
Speaker 6: to watch the girls for a few hours. My dad

1357
01:01:36,680 --> 01:01:38,640
Speaker 6: sided with my neighbors and said that I should probably

1358
01:01:38,720 --> 01:01:40,920
Speaker 6: learn a bit because I can't avoid being around kids forever.

1359
01:01:41,000 --> 01:01:43,320
Speaker 6: I didn't think I did anything wrong, and had Stacy

1360
01:01:43,400 --> 01:01:46,040
Speaker 6: stayed around see if my grandma was there, this could

1361
01:01:46,040 --> 01:01:48,919
Speaker 6: have been avoided. And furthermore, I didn't complain much about

1362
01:01:48,920 --> 01:01:51,640
Speaker 6: watching them, just that it made me anxious, like all

1363
01:01:51,760 --> 01:01:54,000
Speaker 6: kids do. I do feel guilty for snapping on a

1364
01:01:54,000 --> 01:01:56,200
Speaker 6: woman whose husband just had a stroke, but I feel

1365
01:01:56,200 --> 01:01:57,920
Speaker 6: like she shouldn't be allowed to accuse me of being

1366
01:01:57,920 --> 01:02:00,400
Speaker 6: irresponsible because she didn't like how I handled her kids

1367
01:02:00,440 --> 01:02:03,200
Speaker 6: with zero notice and little experience with children. Am I

1368
01:02:03,240 --> 01:02:07,760
Speaker 6: wrong for not responsibly watching kids I never agreed to watch?

1369
01:02:07,880 --> 01:02:10,680
Speaker 7: And there is comment or there are some comments.

1370
01:02:10,760 --> 01:02:14,200
Speaker 9: No, you're like you did, like the best thing you

1371
01:02:14,200 --> 01:02:17,160
Speaker 9: could do is, uh, come on in, let's watch some TV.

1372
01:02:17,760 --> 01:02:20,840
Speaker 9: I have at least the fact that you offered them food, right,

1373
01:02:21,000 --> 01:02:22,960
Speaker 9: and you're like, this is the that's all you need

1374
01:02:23,000 --> 01:02:25,280
Speaker 9: to do, Give them food, water, let them do their thing,

1375
01:02:25,400 --> 01:02:25,840
Speaker 9: and like.

1376
01:02:25,840 --> 01:02:27,479
Speaker 4: Okay, you guys are good, good. Great.

1377
01:02:27,520 --> 01:02:29,960
Speaker 7: Comment number one says, not the a hole, but she is.

1378
01:02:30,160 --> 01:02:32,480
Speaker 6: Tell her the next time you'll call the police for

1379
01:02:32,600 --> 01:02:35,080
Speaker 6: child abandonment since she dropped them off on a porch.

1380
01:02:35,160 --> 01:02:37,400
Speaker 6: Comment number suit says, not the a hole. I understand

1381
01:02:37,400 --> 01:02:39,360
Speaker 6: she had a legit and scary emergency, but she left

1382
01:02:39,400 --> 01:02:41,320
Speaker 6: her kids on a porch with no evidence of anyone

1383
01:02:41,360 --> 01:02:43,720
Speaker 6: being home, and you put your own comfort aside and

1384
01:02:43,760 --> 01:02:46,479
Speaker 6: made sure her children were safe and fed, I might add,

1385
01:02:46,520 --> 01:02:48,920
Speaker 6: which is the only thing that matters in situations like that.

1386
01:02:48,960 --> 01:02:51,960
Speaker 6: She should have apologized and thank you and paid you,

1387
01:02:52,360 --> 01:02:55,160
Speaker 6: like one does with teenage babysitters. Oh he says, I

1388
01:02:55,240 --> 01:02:57,240
Speaker 6: kind of understand why she didn't pay me, since she

1389
01:02:57,400 --> 01:02:59,680
Speaker 6: was going off the assumption that my grandma would be there,

1390
01:02:59,720 --> 01:03:02,320
Speaker 6: who watches them for free. I'm really mostly upset about

1391
01:03:02,320 --> 01:03:04,920
Speaker 6: the vegetarian thing because I'm not sure how I was

1392
01:03:05,000 --> 01:03:07,040
Speaker 6: meant to ask if they could eat meat, which she

1393
01:03:07,200 --> 01:03:10,360
Speaker 6: left them without a word or any instructions. Someone responds,

1394
01:03:10,440 --> 01:03:12,600
Speaker 6: once she found out that you got stuck babysitting, she

1395
01:03:12,640 --> 01:03:14,600
Speaker 6: should have paid you, or got you a gift card

1396
01:03:14,680 --> 01:03:17,360
Speaker 6: or done something nice for you. You are not your grandmother.

1397
01:03:17,440 --> 01:03:20,320
Speaker 6: Regardless of your attitude. You kept her kids safe. It

1398
01:03:20,360 --> 01:03:25,040
Speaker 6: goes back to Maslow's hierarchy of needs when there's an emergency, food, shelter, safety,

1399
01:03:25,160 --> 01:03:28,120
Speaker 6: all of which you provided. I don't eat any animal products,

1400
01:03:28,120 --> 01:03:29,920
Speaker 6: and I'm on your side here with the chicken nuggets.

1401
01:03:30,000 --> 01:03:31,400
Speaker 3: You had no way of knowing.

1402
01:03:31,600 --> 01:03:34,520
Speaker 6: Nuggets and French fries are standard kit Fair, and you're

1403
01:03:34,560 --> 01:03:37,120
Speaker 6: a teenager, and that would be something that you would cook.

1404
01:03:37,200 --> 01:03:39,240
Speaker 6: And those children are old enough to tell you if

1405
01:03:39,240 --> 01:03:41,880
Speaker 6: they don't eat something. You are still not the a hole.

1406
01:03:41,960 --> 01:03:44,919
Speaker 6: But she coming number three, says that you did nothing wrong.

1407
01:03:44,960 --> 01:03:47,680
Speaker 6: I would have gone off on old stacy as far

1408
01:03:47,720 --> 01:03:50,400
Speaker 6: as I read you answered more politely than many people

1409
01:03:50,440 --> 01:03:52,920
Speaker 6: would have. If you are female, please don't feel that

1410
01:03:52,960 --> 01:03:55,120
Speaker 6: you should have some natural tendency to be able to

1411
01:03:55,120 --> 01:03:57,760
Speaker 6: care for children. You get anxious around them, fine, don't

1412
01:03:57,800 --> 01:03:59,560
Speaker 6: be near them. I get anxious with heights.

1413
01:03:59,600 --> 01:04:04,600
Speaker 7: Nothing wrong. There is an update. It is an overage.

1414
01:04:04,760 --> 01:04:06,959
Speaker 4: I mean those comments were really pretty much what we said.

1415
01:04:07,200 --> 01:04:09,720
Speaker 7: We all agree here, so onto the update.

1416
01:04:09,800 --> 01:04:11,720
Speaker 6: I ended up waiting for my parents to calm down

1417
01:04:11,760 --> 01:04:13,560
Speaker 6: from work and decided to bring it up again, and

1418
01:04:13,600 --> 01:04:16,080
Speaker 6: they were a lot more receptive. I explained my side

1419
01:04:16,080 --> 01:04:18,040
Speaker 6: again and said that I would no longer babysit for

1420
01:04:18,080 --> 01:04:20,920
Speaker 6: Stacy under any circumstances, and next time this happened, I

1421
01:04:20,920 --> 01:04:23,560
Speaker 6: would be calling CPS for abandonment. My dad apologized for

1422
01:04:23,600 --> 01:04:26,320
Speaker 6: insisting that I take a parenting course, but reiterated the

1423
01:04:26,360 --> 01:04:29,160
Speaker 6: situation was an emergency and I should give Stacy more grace,

1424
01:04:29,200 --> 01:04:32,360
Speaker 6: and my grandma said that she would talk to Stacy. Unsurprisingly,

1425
01:04:32,640 --> 01:04:35,440
Speaker 6: Stacy didn't react well. She again said that she was

1426
01:04:35,480 --> 01:04:37,520
Speaker 6: disgusted by how I treat people in a time of

1427
01:04:37,600 --> 01:04:40,080
Speaker 6: need and criticize my grandma for raising me to be

1428
01:04:40,120 --> 01:04:42,640
Speaker 6: so selfish. My grandma said that if she had an

1429
01:04:42,680 --> 01:04:45,680
Speaker 6: issue with how she raised her grandchildren, Stacy shouldn't want

1430
01:04:45,720 --> 01:04:47,760
Speaker 6: my grandma around her own kids either, and that she

1431
01:04:48,080 --> 01:04:50,920
Speaker 6: was taking back the babysitting offer. Stacy didn't send a

1432
01:04:50,960 --> 01:04:53,280
Speaker 6: text reply and came back to our porch and began

1433
01:04:53,400 --> 01:04:56,160
Speaker 6: banging on the door demanding to talk to me. My

1434
01:04:56,240 --> 01:04:58,520
Speaker 6: dad opened the door we have a glass screen which

1435
01:04:58,640 --> 01:05:02,000
Speaker 6: was closed, and and said that if she didn't leave,

1436
01:05:02,040 --> 01:05:04,680
Speaker 6: he would call the police and report her for pestermint

1437
01:05:04,960 --> 01:05:07,760
Speaker 6: and child neglect. That was enough to get her to

1438
01:05:07,880 --> 01:05:10,160
Speaker 6: leave after spitting on the glass screen.

1439
01:05:10,320 --> 01:05:10,800
Speaker 7: Bros.

1440
01:05:10,880 --> 01:05:13,320
Speaker 6: But Okay, a few hours have passed since then and

1441
01:05:13,360 --> 01:05:16,000
Speaker 6: nobody has heard from or seen Stacy, So I think

1442
01:05:16,000 --> 01:05:18,200
Speaker 6: this was finally done and overwidth and there are some

1443
01:05:18,320 --> 01:05:19,440
Speaker 6: quick comments.

1444
01:05:19,080 --> 01:05:21,000
Speaker 4: He's one of those. He's a spitter.

1445
01:05:21,320 --> 01:05:26,680
Speaker 6: Spitter Yeah, actually the comment probably chicken, some chicken on

1446
01:05:26,720 --> 01:05:27,040
Speaker 6: her door.

1447
01:05:27,200 --> 01:05:29,840
Speaker 4: Well, but we could take it on the kids. But

1448
01:05:30,560 --> 01:05:33,840
Speaker 4: that's crazy, Gosh, that's crazy.